#hilarity ensues

[enumchase]

not sure why a sports writer is doing signings at a rare book store but from what it seems like divine intervention the book is selling stupidly well

[britcision]

Alright I’m on a Dead On Main kick but I’m also permanently in house “Danny Should Adopt Connor For Proper Clone Parenting”

So let’s combine those for crack purposes!

Timelines are fake and so are trees

Jason and Danny are both technically younger than Connor’s supposed to be, and both actually older than Connor is

There’s some fight in Gotham big enough to justify both Superman and Superboy showing up, Red Hood’s willingly working with the bats, mass hysteria

Jason Todd knows more than enough about forcing a working relationship with shitty parents enough to have Suspicions about how Man and Boy are interacting

He knew them before he died and knew it was a bad relationship then, it’s clearly no better

But it’s shooty shooty guns time so we’ll get to that later

Eventually he has to call in the bf because the JL are getting their asses kicked and Danny shows up and joins the fight

Even he can spot the tension and he and Jason exchange Big Gay Looks

But as the fight goes on, Connor’s pinned

In Big Danger, going down, Superman’s closest and doesn’t even glance twice

Just turns away

In comes Danny with the steel chair and if some flying fragments of goon nearly hit Supes, well, pure coincidence

Danny helps Connor to his feet and they get back into it, Connor gets to be in on the big plan which is Get Danny To The Middle

One ghostly wail later, that’s it that’s the fight

Everyone’s wondering what happened, how all the baddies disappeared, Danny gives Connor a pat on the shoulder

“I’m retired kid, and couldn’t have done it without you, so do me a favour and you take this win”

Danny’s gone, Connor’s confused, Jason INSTANTLY backs him up

If Bats is wondering who the unknown fighting alongside them was, well, Superman’s making his biggest constipated faces about congratulating his clone

Jason promises to explain everything if Connor comes by for coffee, Connor has no social life so post debrief they go and pick up enough for 3

Connor’s a little surprised cuz yeah, Jason’s different from when he was Robin, but way less angry and violent than Dick’s led him to believe

Jason explains it’s because of his new bf Danny, the explainer in this case

They get back to Danny in his human form, he’s all gushy and happy to meet Connor cuz whether he went to space or not Connor is technically an alien

Connor gets very quiet about his dna donors

Danny gets Instantly Suspicious and remembers that moment in the fight

Jason rats out the incidents he knows about where Superman’s been a shit

Connor insists we are Not Talking About This It’s Fine

Danny stares him in the face

“Hey wanna meet my clone? Her name’s Danielle, her creator made her try to murder me to replace me. She’s my sister and best friend and I love her dearly and You’re My Clone Now Too.”

Connor, befuddled, is instantly adopted by Dani as well because Clone Sibling, who cares about genetics

Jason tells Connor they’re always like this, but yeah, if he doesn’t wanna put up with Supes’ shit he can go his own way

He doesn’t even have to go full Red Hood style, but they’ll take care of him if he wants to break off on his own

Connor doesn’t believe Supes would ever allow this and would kill Connor the second he showed any hesitance

Danny goes Full Eldritch Horror

Jason:

“Oh hey I don’t think I formally introduced you, Connor this is my boyfriend Danny, the King of the Infinite Realms, you just watched him melt a guy who was kicking Clark’s ass. What were your concerns again?”

And that’s how Connor ends up adopted by his friend’s baby brother and his eldritch boyfriend, complete with happy family jokes

Jason and Danny both call him their baby incessantly and Connor will never admit he kinda loves it, not least for the faces Dick makes

Superman does predictably kick up a stink about Connor not living on base, Batman can’t control Jason but Jason isn’t a world ending threat

Jason smiles extremely sweetly and demonstrates exactly what a world ending threat looks like by texting Danny, who shows up again in full Eldritch Horror

And then Danny texts JAZZ and the Justice League learn the true meaning of fear from a 6’9 redhead therapist who went to the Harley Quinn school of “Sit Down And Shut Up While I Read You For Filth”

Danny pinky swears not to end the world if the JL leave Jason and Connor alone, they can even still be on call for the league and MAYBE so will Danny

If they’re extremely lucky

Constantine assures them this is The Only Way Fucking Hell Superman What Did You Do

The only hiccup in the happily ever after is Dick deciding this makes him Connor’s uncle and being insufferable about it

Danny agrees and it only makes it worse

[opalinedaydreams]

😐

[y3t1cr4b54ndb4t5]

idea for an au.

cav and dakota somehow manage to save martin and bridget's lives, so they make them milo's godfathers

[binart]

👀✨

I WROTE ANOTHER WOLGRAHA THING BLEAS GIVE IT A READ

[italoniponic]

I had these memes in my head for so long about love triangle scenarios but I'm so up to comedy that it could actually turn out into a amusing situation rather than a mere cliché

so where what I could imagine Jack and Silver's rivalry in my head bc I love both of them (obviously applied to Yulia as well) VS what actually is

good Lord, I love two head empty silver-knight-ish loyal boys

also brief Endless Halloween spoilers (if you're from the en server) bc the last one turned out so good:

they're such an unexpected neutral-chaotic trio and I love it

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Zedaph is fully human, but he was raised by sheep like how you hear about how some people get raised by wolves or dogs. The first time he met Ren, he assumed that Ren was raised by wolves. But nope, Ren is a werewolf. Joe wasn’t raised by humans either, but he won’t say who he was raised by. No one is brave enough to ask. Except Cleo, but she won’t tell anyone

Meanwhile, Cleo is just itching for someone to ask who she was raised by. It's a very easy answer. She's got the necromancer's business card right here! They're having a sale, you know: buy two resurrection rituals, get one skeletal minion free! You should really go check it out, the fees are dead cheap. :)

~ Mod Shade

[snailboycal]

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE MAKE A DREAMLING FIC WHERE HOB COMES ACROSS A BLACK STRAY CAT AND IS LIKE “awww you poor thing arent you adorable” AND THEN DECIDES TO TAKE IT HOME AND IT TURNS OUT TO BE DREAM

[hiikohakiss]

university is kickin my ass

[unfamiliar-reference]

The facts are these: A string of supernatural phenomena is unfolding in Coeur d'Coeurs, where unrelated dead people are coming back to life. With the famous "Pie Hole" as a big bonus (ahem) brothers Sam and Dean Winchester from Lawrence - Kansas, hunters of things that go bump in the night, prepare to get to the pie heart of the matter. 

Suptober22, day 12: Crossover (Pushing Daisies)

[dammitperseus]

khaenri’ah oc brain damage

[shadowkira]

I don't really like jealousy in fics but there's just something about territorial!Falin that makes my brain go brrr. Probably that it doesn't normally fit her, but because it's a side effect of her not being entirely human, it makes for interesting plot. Especially if she isn't aware of it happening.

Bonus points if Laios is the one who realizes because of his interest in monsters. 👀

[sohannabarberaesque]

Just imagine this as the walk-in routine for The Banana Splits in concert

As the announcement "And here they ah--THE BANANA SPLITS!!" is made over the tannoy (via recording, know), each of the members, as their names are announced, comes on in a rather bombastic walking stylee calling to mind Monty Python's "Ministry of Silly Walks" sketch.

@warnerbrosentertainment @thebananasplitsblog @archive-archives @the-banana-splits-blog @warnerbrosent-blog

[iddybyddybee]

Fun little nothing activity

Here's an idea I came up with randomly yesterday to cure myself of boredom. This is the exact thing I wrote in my phone notepad.

Look up all the Fire Emblem: Awakening characters

Write them all down

Use the color wheel to spin two

Find the fanfiction of the pair.

So far? It's proving to be tickling how many pairings can have fanfiction, even if it's just one. I can't wait for the crack ships. The power of AO3!

[fairy-space]

Part of what makes dracula cool isnt just the blood sucking and turning into mist. No. It's professor van helsing and his clueless band of lucy groupies

[analogwriting]

my nap today had me waking up in a cold sweat. I had a dream - A VISION

sabo n a very tall n dom reader

that is all