#honestly I don't feel qualified to give any advice

[seherstudies]

Hi Seher-senpai,

I take it you study Japanese at university?

Feel like sharing what it's like?

I only took a course back when I was a uni student at a uni of applied science. Since then, I've been dabbling in self-studying but that is kind of hard to keep up at times... I'd like to get back into "proper" studying, so I would like to ask whether you have some tips?

Anyways, thanks for your blog, I just found it and scrolled a little through it. Always cool to meet other JP learners 😊

Sending some good vibes from Bavaria

-Bee

Sorry that it took me some time to get back to you. Life is busy at the moment, oh and servus aus Österreich! :)

I take it you study Japanese at university?

I do! I am a Japanese studies major, so they come in the bundle haha

Feel like sharing what it's like?

Sure thing! Beforehand, I have two types (?) of Japanese classes, Japanische Theorie (Theoretical Japanese), which is held in German, and Japanische Praxis (Practical Japanese), which is entirely in Japanese

The pace can sometimes be a bit too fast for me, sometimes we would do an entire chapter in one lesson.... But overall, I enjoy most parts of my classes!

In Theory, we learn about grammar passively and you could also say about how to translate Japanese into German and it's also profs way to check if we understood the grammar. The exams of the class kill me though. In a semester we have two kanji and two translation exams and I don't know which one is worse lmao The first two few years we only worked with textbooks (we used Bunka Shokyu Nihongo 1+2 and now we use the Advanced Tobira) but now, I am in my last year, we moved on to different types of texts like song lyrics, essays and learn more about slang, spoken Japanese and that sort. I am grateful for that because Tobira can be quite dry at times. It’s definitely my favourite out of the two simply because the prof makes it a heap of fun with his random, while educational, rambles or anecdotes.

Praxis we should learn how to apply the grammar studied in Theory, so we do a lot of grammar exercises (complete the sentences mostly). It certainly helped with building a strong foundation, but I do wish we would… actually use the language in class more ya know. The only “speaking” we do is by reading sentences out loud and I am not sure about my peers, but it certainly doesn’t help me learn how to speak Japanese. We are not learning Japanese to be able to communicate but simply for class where we cover topics you will most likely never have a conversation about. At least I know I will never talk about robots. But I have the feeling that is an issue with most language classes...

I'd like to get back into "proper" studying, so I would like to ask whether you have some tips?

Good question. I had to think about it a bit ngl and I hope some things will be useful to you in a way.

Build discipline while you still have a lot of motivation. The first one or two weeks use apps like Duolingo or Lingodeer simply to build the habit of daily learning. Even better if you can set a specific time every day. For example, every day after dinner it is Anki/Memrise/Lingodeer/etc. o’clock. You HAVE to do a bit every day - even if it's just for 3 minutes. If you teach your brain that sometimes you can skip, then it will try to find excuses to skip another day and soon you will slip.

Have different activities for different levels of energy/attention. This kind of latches on to the previous point. Have core activities you do every day for the sake of progress and on days where you are more motivated and alert, do something that requires more effort and have a set of relaxing activities for your low days to keep your TL floating around in your head.

consistency > efficiency. The best method is not the most optimized one or what someone says is more efficient but the one you actually enjoy and stick to. This also goes when you choose media to consume, read/watch what you enjoy. Keep a healthy mix though: Each medium has it's own speaking style. You won't learn everyday Japanese if you only watch dramas or anime, so include a variety like drama, anime, podcasts, Youtube videos, news etc.

Choose a resource for grammar, vocab etc. and stick with it until the end unless you really don't like it. This video (~12min) by Robin McPherson goes more into depth of the 'Paradox of Choice' and what it means for language learners in this day and age and how you can counter choice paralysis. Japanese is a popular language. Therefore there are many resources out there and it’s easy to start doubting our decision. You see the next shiny thing and want to try that out and often we don’t even think twice about purchasing another textbook because you have heard something good about it. I highly recommend the video!

I can also recommend you this video by Livakivi on how to learn Japanese but it's a general guide. His videos are great! The most important part though is having fun with the language though. Best of luck!

[candiid-caniine]

Hey! Long time no see, i know i said id send you a fantasy i thought you'd like but now ive forgotten almost all of it, oop!

Life happened, and uh, i saw that you mentioned your libido being a bit low, which definitely is my case too (im recovering from depression, now that im okay id love to get my FULL libido back, or at least a good percentage of it) do you have any tips on that?

Also any recs of blogs writing in the same vibe as you? (same-ish kinks would be nice but im specifically looking for queer inclusive stuff!) it makes me 10x hornier than the regular video/photo porn!

Hope you're well, you pathetic little thing!

💫

hi friend!! ugh i feel you. sorry i haven't got any advice on regaining ur libido...we just let mine wax and wane as it will, though denial has been a big help in keeping it steady!

i've heard good things abt ginseng and some other herbs. obvs use at your own risk, mind that some herbal treatments can cross-interact with certain medications, remember that pre-packaged supplement pills are often unregulated and may contain toxins, and be aware that some herbal remedies work better on pw certain anatomy than others, and finally that many herbal remedies considered to increase libido are largely untested on trans folx!

finally, sorry it's taken so long to answer this ask...i'm autistic and have been cataloguing lol. i present to you a list of other blog recs under the cut, organized by general vibe! i've tried to primarily include blogs that do their own posts rather than those who primarily reblog :)

note that my headings may provide some context as to what to expect, but you read at your own risk and each blog will typically have its own trigger warnings addressed in the header/pinned. additionally, i've not tagged some of the ppl below because they prefer that "Men DNI" blogs not interact, and idk if "no cis men" qualifies ahah!

all blogs below are queer- and/or trans-inclusive, if not exclusive! there is no detrans/misgendering, at least I don't think - i don't tend to follow those blogs.

hard kinks (blood, knives, etc; includes primarily-cnc blogs):

@puppy-mommy , who also does general t4t kink content, but does state untagged hard kinks!

@visciousest is someone whose blog i scroll when i'm in a Certain Mood ahah,, i won't elaborate

@hell-hound-bites: just. fuck. would drool on his knife blade.

@snuff-fag: its username should give you fair warning as to how wild its content tends to get, so please browse responsibly.

@condor-bait is taking a break right now, and all my love is with him as he takes care of himself. he made me feel so valid and so fuckable as a young trans person learning to love myself in a new way, and i've always been too shy to tell him how much his content meant to me one-on-one (yes, despite its often-extreme themes!), and he deserves as much time as he needs to heal!

@unwillingfvckpuppy for mostly cnc and medical kinks! if you like his style, but not so much their harder content, he also has a more-tame main blog--i just mainly follow/scroll this one!

@vampvictim: top-tier cnc/intox stuff, plus some great knife/bloodplay :)

@cryptidtid is wonderful and holy shit i follow a lot of hard kink blogs lol. incredible

@cnc-pet: i have been following her for a long ass fucking time lol. they post a lot of really good cnc and stories, but you'll also find a lot of aftercare tips and advice on her blog! i really admire blogs who try to balance horny content with best practices

@dollobotomy

general kinky content:

@excessively-queer . just plain old good shit :) there's a good amt of edging and degradation.

@clouded-king was honestly one of my earlier introductions to the queer/t4t kink community on here and how fucking euphoric it can be :) he posts some hard kinks, but generally it's a balance of a lot of different kinks so read his pinned at your leisure!

@ / cottontailx : just good kinky nsft posts :)

@ / digitalpenetration: often specifically t4t which i love!!

@femmelovefemme can step on me :)

@bigothteddies: could not build this section w/o mentioning him :) they had a big influence on my fantasies for a long time!

@hazelj-xoxo: bigtime want her to cuck me. have followed her across multiple blog deletions lol

@transpidered is forever an icon!

@subspaceemo

@writefinch for great stories and text posts

edging and denial, specifically:

@6irlpet is 1 of my go-to hands-down-pants scroll sessions :)

@droolkink is my inspiration!

@flustersluts does exactly what the name implies lol. a good helping of other kink content too :)

@puppycvnt is a 10/10!

@barkwoofbarkwoofbark: we r denial friends imo!!

@strawbrrysub

@blyssful-abyss

@urhighnessbitch is a big fav <3

non-detrans genderplay:

@butchviolence does amazing butch supremacy stuff and i,,, fucking hell. even just seeing their username puts me in a Particular state of mind ahah. they also post hard kinks so be aware as you proceed!

@mtfdomme: i literally just reblogged from her today lol. tbh i want to be their little stupid pupthing. it's not all transfem supremacy undertones/overtones, but that's what i mainly follow her for, plus just general t4t goodness! also, their general personality? and the way she shuts down people who disrespect their boundaries? huge inspiration for me!

@cuntboydestroyer: take me to the animal shelter and neuter me. good lord.

@the-kind-of-dame is the main inspiration for my recent genderplay post lol

@terfbreaking-tgirl (be warned of dykebreaking if that's an issue for you)

@barbarian-lesbian is my other inspiration for the recent genderplay post

@superiorineveryway

weird asf (/complimentary; my favorite type of shit. robots, ND-focused posts, etc):

@specksizedgoddess has introduced me to things i didn't know, like...existed, and that's saying a lot as one of my special interests is kink! never knew how down bad i was to be a tiny buggirl, nor how much i wanted to be someone's stupid little robot... BIG tw tho: there is snuff and gore content here, so proceed with caution if you don't wanna see that!

@sapphling fucked me up real good with some bird!sub bondage posts awhile back lol

@nobelisha: found them through their ghost cnc post so that's why they're in this category ahah! they don't have a pinned so proceed w awareness :)

@devout-cleric: hierophilia/religion kink, and i'm something of an acolyte of hers :) if you've read this far down you may as well know i'm her Little Lamb anon lol

piss/omo:

@latenightomo

@pissheartmybeloved - their URL makes me crack up every time, plus good content!

@hold-it-a-little-longer - good scenarios/imagines!

@ohmyrashi - (i think) my original intro to omo!

monsterfucking/terato:

@septimus-moonlight was my first real introduction to trans-positive terato and i've never settled for half-fun cis-oriented terato ever since :) mind tags!

@eggedbellies as well!

@bredpun doesn't appear to be active lately but still good for a scroll!

@steamandcream

@of-mutts-and-men

[vergess]

A work friend of mine's daughter has recently developed (?) schizophrenia. He seems to like my advice in general, and in particular thinks I gave him helpful advice about handling traumatic experiences he's had, and so talks to me about this a lot. I've tried to give advice along the lines of prioritizing her comfort/well-being/calmness over her "connection to reality" (his words), like not picking arguments over things she says in pursuit of correcting her, similar to taking care of someone with dementia.

Do you have any points I can focus on or resources I can look up to support him and by extension his daughter better? I'm not very familiar with the subject but do know that in looking this up I'm wading through a lot of stuff that's not very supported or with the schizophrenic person's well being and agency in mind.

You're exactly right about the comparison to dementia. Although not nearly as severe an illness, schizophrenia is one of those "redirect not reinforce" conditions.

So, one of the big things you can suggest, especially while the person is in the early period of onset (which can happen over the course of a year at any age, but usually between 20 and 30), is try to help them make plans for the future. Which sounds big and scary, but it mostly consists of honestly going through with them to make lists of the things they enjoy, the things that stress them out, etc. Because there is going to come a time, and it's sooner than anyone wants, where remembering what she finds relaxing will become impossible on her own (at least, during periods of high stress; she may always be able to self regulate in normal conditions).

Schizophrenia often makes people feel deeply afraid and out of control of their own thoughts, which is really scary!!

But your friend's daughter is likely still able to remember what things she enjoyed before the onset of her illness. Whenever she gets too wound up in a fearful delusion, rather than trying to combat the delusion, I suggest redirecting her to one of the things she enjoys, whatever that may be. A hobby, a movie, etc.

It's important that the idea for the redirection initially come from the schizophrenic person themself. This way, you can honestly say, "hey, remember when you said you like X, why don't we try some X together," and it be something reaffirming to the person's sense of control rather than fighting it.

Of course, if the delusion isn't fearful/scary/stressful, the best thing to do is to accept that it is her genuine reality right now, and just work around that belief. No need to start a fight and make it stressful.

Another thing is, and this is MUCH more controversial in the west but I'll go ahead and say it. Another thing is, if the daughter's voices are friendly or kind, to support her engaging with them (if she so chooses). This way if/when her voices become mean she can choose to "disengage" with them as a conscious change. In practical terms, this means if his daughter is ever having conversations with her voices that seem to be in good spirits, to treat that more like she is talking on the phone with someone you don't know, than to treat it as a scary hallucination.

Then, if the voices ever get mean, she can "give them the silent treatment" to help establish a sense of control over them and help her feel like she doesn't have to listen to them.

In a way, it can be good to conceptualize her voices as "influential strangers" and just encourage her to listen to good influences and ignore bad ones.

Finally, depending on where the daughter lives and her support needs, it might be good to get her registered with the healthcare service in your area sooner than later. In the US, a young person with schizophrenia automatically qualifies for medicaid and can also qualify for disability. Both will need to be applied for, and the application process is a byzantine mess.

Especially regarding disability, it is best to hire a lawyer to make your application (they will be paid out of your benefits not your pocket).

As such, if your coworker's daughter is unlikely to be able to live entirely on her own, including job, hygiene, travel, etc it's a good idea to get there registrations started ASAP. That way if the coworker ever becomes sick or when he eventually dies, etc the daughter can be supported.

If the daughter has low support needs and is likely to be able to live on her own (which can and does happen sometimes!! Even with schizophrenia), one of the biggest challenges she's going to face in the long term is going to the doctor.

Not only are doctors deeply, deeply scary to the mentally ill in the west (for good reason!), which makes doctors a prime target for delusions of fear and abuse. But also delusional thinking can interfere with a person's ability to identify their own body sensations.

EG, it is very common for schizophrenics to "be really angry and not know why" and it turns out it's because they have a UTI but couldn't feel it due to delusions. In fact, it's so common that one of the first things we do at work when a client is very upset like that, is ask them if they have been peeing more often (the answer is usually 'yes').

A huge part of the reason people with schizophrenia die young is the inability to tell when they are sick, followed by feeling unsafe going to the doctor.

Ultimately, the biggest thing to remember is that no matter how stressed or scared you are as a carer, the person with the illness is just as of more stressed. They aren't fighting you, they're fighting terror. Remembering that can make the intense demands of caring for someone with higher support needs less draining.

The second biggest thing is to remember to take time for yourself, because if you burn out as a carer, then you've left your kid without support for potentially months or years, and that's pretty bad compared to having them go to a fun adult program like a summer camp every day for a month while you recover.

Finally: there are more programs for schizophrenia support than you think. Even in my rural bumfuck town of 3000, we have two (2) different programs, including a year round day program that operates 5 days a week and takes walk ins.

Your coworker does not have to take care of his daughter alone. Support exists.

[melbatron5000]

Mr. Beck

When I was a kid, my favorite class was art class. My second favorite was English, but I didn't like hand-writing "complete" sentences. (i.e. if the question was "Why did the chicken cross the road?" we weren't allowed to write "to get to the other side." We had to write "The chicken crossed the road to get to the other side." In neat writing. By hand. When I tell you I nearly had writing and reading beaten out of me through boredom at school, I want you to believe me.)

At any rate, art. I loved it. It was free-flowing, it was creative and imaginative, we learned new techniques for making stuff look cool. And my very favorite art teacher was Mr. Beck.

Most days, we had an art class taught by the usual teacher. But on Wednesdays, Mr. Beck came to our classroom. Like most schools, ours had started to skimp on the humanities budget, so Mr. Beck traveled around and went to different schools each day, and taught a different classroom each hour. Wednesdays were my favorite day.

Mr. Beck clearly loved what he did, and he enjoyed the kids, and he also especially loved me. I didn't recognize it then, but he loved my questions and enthusiasm, he loved that I loved art. (I still do.) I just knew I loved him.

My questions often involved whether or not I could change the assignment somehow. Mr. Beck always listened to my ideas, nodded, and then said, "Yes, that sounds cool, try it." Well, I thought my ideas sounded cool, too, but I wanted to know if I was allowed to try them.

One day, in second grade, I went to Mr. Beck with an idea to change the assignment. He listened, and then he said, kindly but seriously, "You know, Melody, you don't have to ask permission to change the assignment. If I explain something and you have an idea how to do it differently, you can just do whatever you want. In fact, you don't ever have to ask anyone's permission to do any art however you want. Okay?"

And I nodded quietly and went back to my desk, and did the stuff I wanted without asking permission first, and Mr. Beck smiled approvingly at me gave me As on all my artwork and I loved him.

One day in fourth grade, we had an art assignment. I had been living by Mr. Beck's words since the day he spoke them, and I never asked permission from anyone to change an art assignment. I just did what I wanted. For reasons unknown to me -- still to this day -- my fourth grade teacher hated my guts. I seem to randomly inspire that in a few people for no reason that I can discern -- every once in a while, I meet someone and they just despise me as soon as I say hello. Their problem, not mine, but it's mysterious to me. Been that way since I was little.

At any rate, my fourth grade teacher was one of those random people. So when I went wild with this art assignment she gave us -- as per Mr. Beck's instructions -- not only did she give me an F for not following directions, she refused to hang it on the wall for parent-teacher day. I was devastated. My mom went to bat for me, and to this day will tell people what a cool piece of art I made. I honestly don't recall the details of the assignment or what I made instead.

What Mr. Beck failed to tell me when he gave me those excellent instructions was: Sometimes people will try to make you conform and do as they say instead of what you want, but that doesn't change the fact that you don't have to ask anyone's permission.

I was definitely a little beaten down by my fourth grade teacher's response to my art. But I remembered what Mr. Beck said, and I knew that he was a real artist, and my fourth grade teacher was not an artist. I knew that she didn't understand, and wasn't qualified to judge, even if she had judged and tried to make me feel bad about it. She made me feel bad, but not about following Mr. Beck's instructions, and not about my art.

I wish I could find Mr. Beck today and tell him what a deep impact he had on me and on my life. His instructions -- I wouldn't call it advice, because he didn't give it to me that way; he told me, "here is the rule" -- have stayed with me since that day. Even in the face of adversity, even as a kid still, I knew he had it right. I don't have to ask permission to do whatever I want with my art.

I would like to pass that rule on to anyone and everyone who wants to make art of any kind; written, visual, performance, you name it. You don't need anyone's permission to do it how you want. No one's. Even if they don't like it. Even if they think they have some kind of power to make you conform. Even if they try to make you feel bad.

You don't need anyone's permission to do what you want.

Ever.

[ambrossart]

I decided to write my own it fanfiction because of you!! ive read some of your and other critics about bowers gang stories and im trying my hardest to take those in consideration, but i also feel like im late lol the it fandom is almost non existent 😔😔 do you have any advice or tips?

First off, I love that you’re working on your own fic. That’s so awesome!

Second… gosh, I don’t even know if I’m qualified to be giving advice. My writing is so niche, and I feel like there are better people to ask about this kind of thing. I mean, there has to be, right? Or maybe the fandom is that dead. 😬 😂 I dunno, I’m kind of an outsider when it comes to the IT fandom. Apart from writing Paper Men, I don’t interact with it much… or at all, honestly. I’m like a kid playing alone in the sandbox. Sometimes other kids stop by, say hi, compliment my sandcastle, but for the most part I’m just entertaining myself.

So here’s my generic, cliched advice:

Write the fanfiction you wanna read.

Seriously, do whatever you want.

When I started Paper Men, I stopped caring about what everyone else is doing.

This is truly the best advice I can give you: do whatever you want.

Now, to get more Bowers gang specific (I'm assuming you're writing about the Bowers gang. If not, some of these still apply):

Accept these characters for what they are: 🗑️🗑️🗑️ and 🔥🗑️

You can't fix them. You can't change them. I don't care how special your character is. I don't care how "in love" these boys claim to be. These guys are horrible people and partners, and nothing is gonna change that. Nothing.

This is especially true for Henry and Patrick. Henry's way too damaged and Patrick can't magically grow a conscience, so embrace that or stay the hell away from them.

With Belch and Vic, you have a lot more flexibility, especially if you’re going the romance route.

That doesn’t mean you can’t have Henry and Patrick in relationships. You just have to tread carefully and understand your limitations. The rules are different with those two.

Book!Patrick and movie!Patrick are separate characters, so if you wanna make Patrick a little softer, go with his movie portrayal. Since he had such little screentime, you can give him whatever personality you want.

Don't romanticize their violent/abusive/toxic behavior. Seriously, don't.

Avoid the New Kid trope at all costs. It's been done to death at this point.

And no, the Bowers gang won’t be nice to the new kid. Ever.

At best, they’re just gonna ignore them.

Odds are your character isn't going to be close friends with both the Losers club and the Bowers gang. These groups are natural enemies and, more importantly (and especially if you're following the movie canon), they're in completely different age groups. The Bowers gang are all 15-16 and the Losers are 12-13. These groups rarely mix.

If you’re gonna have all the canon characters be drawn to your character, you better give her/him/them one helluva magnetic personality. Otherwise, it’ll seem forced.

Don't have invisible parents. Yes, I realize Derry is full of abusive/neglectful parents, but I feel like many writers go this route simply because it's more convenient. No parents means no rules. But it also isn't very realistic.

Please, please, please, don't ignore Belch and Vic, especially Belch.

Better yet, write about Belch! Nobody ever does 🥺

If you haven't already, read the book.

Sorry, it's hard to give advice without knowing more about your story. I don't know if you're writing a romance or not. I don't know what characters you're focusing on. I don’t know if you’re creating an original character. So if you want more specific advice, you can always DM me or shoot me another Ask. My inbox is always open. 😊

[wickerfemme]

Sorry I don't wanna make it a whole conversation to go thru I just wanted to clarify that I do find plenty of trans women attractive! AND hot even! But idk I guess I'm just sort of turned off by masculinity and it's hard to ignore. It makes me feel like a bad person :( I honestly want to be attracted to her because I love my friends and would love to be comfortable expressing all sorts of love for her even in a platonic way. Idk I don't want to make her feel bad about looking masculine is moreso the issue

That's great to hear! I was putting out there as food for thought, in case there were some unchecked biases at work that would be good to think through.

Like you say, I don't want to make this a whole conversation (also I'm truly so barely qualified to give any sound advice; I'm just some woman), but it sounds like you're just in the spot anyone is in when it comes to an imbalance of attraction. The one piece of advice I'd like to give is: you can have whatever reasons inside yourself for not feeling attraction to someone else, but it's ultimately a chemical thing that doesn't need overexplanation to the party on the other end. It can be "I'm not into like that" and not "I'm not into you like that for [very specific reason]", and that's OK! And where the rationale has a high chance of being very hurtful for the other person and going right to the very most sensitive parts of her psyche, maybe better left to yourself.

[youraverageaemondsimp]

Any tips or something to start writing a fanfic?The truth is I have several ideas but I don't really know how to start. Thanks in advance for responding. I love your stories 💟

I'm not sure if I'm qualified enough to give professional writing tips yet but here's what I do personally:

I gather the ideas of what I want to write in a document first and choose which I feel as if I want to write more.

Honestly fanfics are just an elaboration of an idea, I mostly begin to build the world around it first, like let's say I wanna write an aemond x niece!reader fic, I decide which "niece" the reader is gonna be, whether she's aegons daughter (results in a big age gap between aemond and her) or rhaenyra's daughter and then decide what the situation between the greens and the blacks are like, whether I want it be canon relationships or whether I didn't want the whole usurping to happen.

From then on there I began to build the relationship between aemond and the reader, are they good friends? Or do they hate each other? Why do they hate each other? Any instance from childhood that caused them that? Etc etc

I think it's mostly just like, you have to begin writing first and then the flow will eventually come to you, I have been writing fics (with breaks inbetween) since I was 12 from wattpad, so it's a lot of error and trial.

You can take inspiration from how other authors start their fics, most of them begin with the world building before they get to the actual main part which was their idea, and I recommend reading a lot of fics and take note of it, However the way they begin it is also different, some start off with it directly and then deviate to how that situation occurred and build the plot around it, while some slowly lead up to it.

But honestly, the main thing is just you have to start it don't really overthink too much, and then you'll be put into a trance like state and at that point the story is just writing itself and you're just a vessel typing it haha

And you can also take inspiration from stories that aren't fanfics, like actual books that are written by famous authors and study how they write it too.

I'm not like a professional author, and the experience I have writing is mainly from wattpad 😭 as a kid, but then I didn't write for a few years and began writing again just last year.

And an additional tip I have is that if english isn't your first language, then you can google synonyms for the words you wanna use so you don't repeat them in a fic too often!

Once again, it's just personal experience of mine and not professional advice, I hope this helps 💗💗💗 sorry if this isn't the advice you wanted or for any typos!

And also thank you so much for liking my stories, it means a lot 😭😭😭💓💓💓💓

[woodswolf]

🌿🏜️🔪🪲?

writer's truth or dare ask game

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

honestly? just don't be afraid to step away. sometimes you're not in the right headspace for a project and that's okay. work with your brain, not against it - whether that's on a different WIP or just taking a break for a while. sometimes this means the WIP sits for a little while. sometimes this means you abandon it. roll with the punches, don't dodge into them.

like for example, i've been having One Of The Weeks Of My Life at my job recently and just feeling really burned out and depressed on the Major Fucking Crunch Time this project is getting into. i didn't feel like working on chapter 5 when i was feeling that terrible, but i was able to channel some of that energy into a side story. i've barely started it as of yet, but it's got a lot of potential, has required a lot of research, and just. it's helped burn off a lot of the negative emotion (because it involves a very similar kind of negative emotion and focuses on a kind of burnout recovery. lol)

🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

long analysis comments are like the #1 kind of comment to get in my good books. i get an excuse to talk about Fun Details whether intentional or not and just generally feed information to someone who isn't fully aware of all of the complexities of a project yet (usually my partner lol)

however.

i personally consider that the highest honor i could ever receive would be recursive fanfiction. fanart as well, yes, but fanfiction in particular. it's more or less a reflection of my own process in a way; i write a lot of recursive fanfiction relative to my output, but i only write recursive fanfiction about fanfiction that really, really resonated with me, or that often were incredibly formative to me in their own specific ways. it's not enough for it to be a good story - it has to change something about me, alter my perspective or open my eyes to an entirely new world. often these end up feeling like (or just being) treatises on a particular subject; there are fics on hope, on grief, on forgetting, on becoming monsters. and it's just.... it's powerful.

i could link all of these if anyone is curious.

🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

honestly all of the research i've done for DLD and other fics in the DLDCM (Dogs Leading Dogs Cinematic Multiverse) qualifies as really weird. outside of the semi-standard fanfiction-writer fare (e.g. symptoms of various injuries, or how to identify certain types of injuries like with that shoulder test), there are two broad categories of "what the fuck" research that i've gone into very extensively.

the first category, which i keep coming back to over and over, is all of the speculative biology shit. basically NONE of it is going to come up until more than halfway through catch/cradle at minimum, but at this point ive probably put close to ten hours of research into figuring out what the fuck is wrong with these things. (and that's just the research, not the processing that shit afterward.) i know what this guy breathes. i don't know exactly how his metabolism works, but i do have a general outline that seems approximately sound, and have a general principle for how it interacts with other metabolisms. i don't just know HIS metabolism by the way, i know like three other components' metabolic interactions and life cycles and to some extent their histories. and then we get into all of the other lore shit that is Very Present and Very Real and Very Probably Isn't Going To Be Written Down In Any Fics and also isn't strictly research based as much as vibes based but it doesn't have to be research based because my source is i made it the fuck up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but tl;dr there's a CRAZY amount of various kinds of biology lore and 90% of it is never going to see the light of day most likely

the second category which has generally come about more recently is primitive / historical technology. generally just a lot of how you would do certain things - such as making paper, or refining clay, or working metal or glass - if you were starting from (almost) nothing.

additional shoutout to when i did some brief research on akkadian for one of my recurive fic projects, that was fun but really overwhelming and i ended up not finishing it myself lol

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

from chapter 5:

The ship doesn’t need any additional explanation. “I’ll set the course,” it says. Brief and to the point. He can’t help but appreciate that right now. The controls shift ever-so-slightly under his hands as they start following a slightly different autopilot route. It’ll set them up for the approach path they discovered on the second day — one that doesn’t cut through as many of the giant trees.

thanks for the ask!! :D

[annawayne]

hi! how long does it take you to do your illustrations aprox? it seems you have a lot of patience rendering! any tricks / advices to other artists? :)

Oh, hello, anon!

First of all, thank you for your interest! I really appreciate your time for writing it (⁠｡⁠・⁠/⁠/⁠ε⁠/⁠/⁠・⁠｡⁠)

Answering your question, I guess, I'm quite patient person indeed, since I work on my arts several days, for a few hours, my rendering process, to be honest, distract me a lot and I totally concentrate on the process (and music/lectures I listen to while working on it).

And for the time, it all depends on the art! This recent art took me around 20 hours in total, for example.

As for advices, oh... Thank you for asking, and I don't know if I'm qualified enough to give someone advices + I'm self-taught and a lot I learn by myself with mistakes and a lot of experiments, but I'll try for you anon!

(I use Photoshop, so some of my advices are based on it)

1. Don't be afraid to experiment with angles and facial features. It's honestly very easy to fall into the infinite cycle of the "same face syndrome". Embrace the diversity of human beauty! It's definitely a challenge, but it would allow you to go further with other methods;

2. Take a look at the Layer Blending Modes - try all of them to see how it affect your drawing. I would also note that using Blending modes on separate layers and changing your brush setting with Bleeding mode give you two different effects, that can be used both! All you need just to find what works for you, but I adore Blending modes and I use it a lot, especially for the lightning and glowing effects;

3. Textures! I love using a lot of textures to give my arts some sharpness, some surface you can feel by looking at it - I usually use a lot of texture with Blending modes, above all the layers! Scratches, grains, some frames, brush strokes etc - everything may work for your art to make it more alive and breathing, the way you want to touch it and to feel under your finger tips. And, in my personal opinion, it gives the illustrationsl the additional volumes and it can highlit some nuances in your art;

4. Don't forget to flip your art and zoom out during your drawing process! Such a simple advice but it's honestly a saver to spot mistakes/some details needed to be adjusted;

5. Liqify tool is the best friend. If you have something to change the form but redrawing it also not option (too late, too much to adjust, will ruin the whole art) - Liqify is the true friend. I often use it to adjust some small details when I already further into the process, and it saves a lot of grey hair.

Well, that's not much but I hope it was a bit useful!

Thank you so much for asking and for the interest once again, I honestly appreciate it (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡

Have a nice timezone c:

[koifsssh]

do u have any art tips?

oh! ...like... in general? i'm not sure! I don't feel as if i am qualified to give such advice, as i am still learning myself! I can say this though- experiment! experiment as much as your heart desires! art is broad and vast, there are multiple mediums you can mess with! in general, i suppose anatomy would be a good start! having a proper handle on how the body is structured allows you to alter it! there's a saying my father told me once, "once you know the rules, then you will know how to break them" i am still trying to work on my realism/anatomy, but i do love having fun, so for me in all honestly i throw paint on a canvas and see what looks good.

i would say have fun most of all! in my personal experience, my art looks the best when i am having fun!

[oh-katsuki]

i have a boyfriend (dating for a little over a year) but i think im having a crush on one of my friend's friends—hes just more my type physically and he's a really nice person, but i still love my boyfriend. i just dont know how to feel ☹️ do you have any advice ?

hiiiiii so i may not be the most well versed in this subject, but i think feeling baseline human attraction to other people is somewhat normal even when you're in a relationship. like we're human. we'll see someone and think "oh that person is good looking" etc etc. it's natural to notice someone that we find attractive.

i will say though, that if you think you're starting to have a bit of a crush on this other person in the emotional sense, you owe it to your relationship to distance yourself from that person in the most polite way possible. finding them attractive isn't really wrong, but going out of your way to interact when you know you feel that way might be. set boundaries for yourself and acknowledge that while you may find this other person attractive, you are ultimately in love with ur bf and want to respect the boundaries of your relationship.

that being said, i do think that this is a bit of a touchy / nuanced subject that i don't particularly feel qualified to give advice in. honestly, the best way to go about it would be to think about how you would feel if the situation were reversed and make your decisions that way. if your partner did it and it would hurt you, don't do it, etc etc.

[multiplicity-positivity]

Hi there! I hope you guys are doing well.

I've been a questioning system on and off for the past long while, and was just wondering - is it normal to feel like it's difficult to think about? Not in an anxiety or "I don't want to think about it" way, but in a "I want to think about it and understand better but it feels like there is a physical barrier in my brain preventing me from thinking about it too hard or reaching out to any potential headmates?" It's starting to get really frustrating.

It takes a lot of concentration and effort to be able to reach out, and when I am able to, I rarely get responses, and they're normally just one-word replies where it's almost hard to tell if I got a reply at all or if I'm just psyching myself out.

I was just wondering if y'all had any advice or thoughts? Is this normal? Does this mean anything? I don't know what to do, or if I'm actually a system at all (I have all of the symptoms of PDID but can't tell if it's actually PDID or just a compound of a bunch if other symptoms from other stuff) and I'm really lost. Any advice that any of y'all have would be monumentally helpful.

Also, I just wanted to say thank you for the amount of resources y'all have on this blog. I've found so many of them so helpful, so, just, thank all of you so much. I hope y'all have a wonderful day :)

Hi! The short answer to your question is yes, this is very normal, especially for systems with dissociative disorders or those who have dissociative barriers between headmates.

Our host also seriously struggled to establish and build contact and communication between us at first - and that’s even just with our established core fronting group! It took a lot of effort, patience, and work in therapy for us to reach the level of communication we have today. Even now, there are quite a few alters in our system who many of us do not have access to. At this point, we’ve learned to take things slow and try not to rush to bring down those barriers. We’re focusing on moving forward a little bit at a time, and that’s honestly been quite effective for us!

We’d encourage you, if you haven’t already, to start journalling, and encourage other potential parts, alters, or headmates to write in the journal as well. Even if you can’t get in touch with them, reminding yourself that the journal is for everyone and leaving it in an easily accessible place might allow your headmates to start expressing themselves and attempt to get to know each other even if y’all aren’t able to contact each other well inside just yet.

We also have this post on establishing contact with headmates - maybe it’ll be helpful for y’all?

Please don’t stress too much if no one writes in the journal or you don’t hear back from any headmates straight away. Again, this process takes plenty of time and patience! Honestly we’d say give it a few months of attempts before you start to grow discouraged. Also, having access to a qualified therapist who you trust can be immensely beneficial for getting through to headmates, especially at first!

And if it turns out you’re not actually a system, remember that’s okay!! That is totally fine. You mentioned PDID, which means you might have PTSD or C-PTSD, both of which often come with dissociation as a symptom or trauma response. So as long as you’re prioritizing your health and getting the help you need, to us, that’s definitely most important!

We’re wishing you the best of luck with figuring this out. Feel welcome to reach out to us again if you need any more help in the future! We’re not experts or professionals, but we’re more than happy to help with advice and resources to the best of our ability.

🌸 Margo and 🖋 Cecil

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

heyy <3

can i get some writing tips??

like how to describe something without seeming too much?

oh and how tf do i write smut 😭 i always cringe and end up deleting it

thank you 💙🤍

p.s. have a lovely dayyy

Okay look i usually never answer these asks with any real advice because i just don't think i am qualified to teach anybody how to write. I'm so sleepy and tired rn so obviously I'm going to give you advice. I will tell you what i try to bear in mind while i write which is never haha. Please don't read this more than once:

When describing:

People:

Don't describe clothes/outfits in intricate detail unless the details matter/contribute to the story/plot. Or if the clothes themselves help describe something else (eg. Her blue shirt made hear eyes appear bluer than ever.)

While we're on a person's appearance, try to describe a character in a way that tells us more than just about what you're describing (eg. His sweet smile was directly at odds with the malevolence his eyes always gleamed with.) Two birds, one stone.

Please refrain from having character stand before a mirror and describe themselves in painful detail to the reader. Just please no. (Case in point: nicely separated breasts. iykyk)

Describe a person's nature/character using their actions. Actions similar in style/motive etc will go on to form the character's tendencies. This is how the reader can then go "ah shit, he's about to fuck around and find out isn't he thE IDIOT NOOO I KNEW IT!!!". Additionally, this can also be a way to surprise the reader "great she's gonna work late AGAIN and miss the— SHE JUST BROKE HER BOSS' FACE?!?!!?AHSHSJSJHSHS"

Setting:

Describe what is pertinent to the scene you're writing. If you describe one particular thing in rich detail, it's gotta play an important role at some point.

The curtains don't have to be blue if the character is sad. They can be any colour you want them to be. Use instant instinct to draw details; if you overthink you might end up pouring a whole lot of meaning into stuff that you never intended to and this might distract from the actual story.

The more details you provide, the clearer the picture in the reader's mind (also the more you need to remember if you're revisiting the room). It's a fucking gamble.

When providing descriptions in general, less is more. I struggle a lot with this because i want to tell the readers about every flower in the upholstery and every lamp post on the street. When you read the old classics you'll find all these detailed descriptions and they're just so charming. Something about the way literature has evolved since then has prompted professors to teach us not to bore the reader with too much or something. Like, honestly, i don't think any two writers can describe something in the same way. It all comes down to style i think??

On writing smut:

I am the opposite of an expert just please don't listen to me.

Please just say cock.

PLEASE DON'T SAY CUM.

Please let them sweat and smell like it; let them make dying whale noises instead of musical moans; sometimes people have kinda funny or weird sex faces and that's fine i think.

Body parts dangle and sag and bulge and jiggle.

Bodies have hair.

Write what you think would feel good. Chances are that others might think so too.

No he cannot last that long, make him come.

No she did not squirt like a fountain.

No he does not taste like fucking mango sorbet or some gourmet shit; his cock tasted like a dick because it is a penis.

No her vagina did not look like a rose spreading its petals and did not taste like a strawberry; it smelled and tasted like a vagina.

Sometimes sex is awkward.

Not everyone is an expert.

I think it's safe to say that one does not usually have fourteen consecutive orgasms.

Look i can go on and on. Keep smut real and stay in character and things will sound hot because the people having sex in scene think it's hot.

Everything i have just written is complete bullshit. Kisses!

[lawbyrhys]

The Britney Spears v. Halsey Legal Quasi-Threat

As I'm sure everybody is well aware of by now, Britney Spears has been in the news quite often in the last five years as it pertains to her messy conservatorship and associated legal battles. If you don't know, here's a brief summary: Britney Spears was placed under a conservatorship in 2008 and stayed in this arrangement until 2021, when she was freed for the entanglement by her all-star counsel, namely Mathew Rosengart.

What's new with Britney as it pertains to her legal affairs and conflicts? Let's get into the latest in a string of the pop star's situations.

This just occurred today, July 26, and I received requests to provide context and my qualified commentary based on on the facts at hand.

This is not legal advice. I am not the counsel for either party discussed here. This is merely legal commentary based solely on public records.

Since 2021, the pop star has been in and out of the legal news sphere, an example being the allegations that her 2023 memoir, "The Woman In Me," was too revealing and had to be sent back into editing to avoid legal ramifications.

Besides that, though, Spears has been relatively quiet as far as her professional output, having released only two singles and aforementioned book since her 14-year conservatorship ended.

Today, that changed when Spears tweeted and deleted a legal threat to peer pop singer Halsey. The latter's newest single, "Lucky," samples the 2000 Spears single of the same name, and the accompanying music video features many nods to Spears' iconic looks from throughout her career. Despite earlier reporting that Halsey had the veteran star's blessing on her new single, Spears took to X today to dispute those claims.

In her post, Spears claimed she felt “harassed, violated and bullied” by the portrayal of her as a "superficial pop star" in Halsey's music video. The former continued she was "speaking with [her] lawyers today to see what can be done on this matter. It feels illegal and down right cruel."

As mentioned above, Spears quickly deleted this post, writing in an update: "Fake news !!! This was not me on my phone !!! I love Halsey and that's why I deleted it !!!" She wrapped the post with a rose emoji—her text signature.

It's important to note that in order to sample one recording in another, you need two licenses. One is the use of the master sound recording or performance, as per a record label, and a license for the actual composition, usually controlled by a publisher or the songwriter. This means Spears more than likely had knowledge of the sampling beforehand, thus giving her the opportunity to provide her "blessing" as stated.

Those are the facts, so here's my opinions on it.

So what do I think? Honestly, I think there's nothing for me to add here. There's no tangible proof one way or another as it pertains to Spears' phone "hacking" insinuation, so I can't speak much to that beyond taking her word for it. As for the Halsey single itself, if it was cleared legitimately via the proper avenues, though, it does not really require a "blessing" after the fact. That said, there is no proof that Spears was against Halsey's single as it stands now, since the former has already countered her original claim on X and cleared up any objections she may have had to the aforementioned situation. With no concrete evidence either way—the musical release has been met with no legal repercussions for Halsey whatsoever—it is reasonable to believe there is no legal dispute here until when and if further evidence is presented by either side for the above matters.

If I had to contribute something of substance, though, I'd probably say that the sample for Halsey's single could've been ckeared while the accompanying visuals were not. That said, it is possible Spears took issue with the visual emulations of herself portrayed in the music video and not the single itself—this is the issue taken up by Spears in her initial post. Being that the visuals are indeed emulations of Spears' own iconography, a legal argument could be made about her "likeness" and associated intellectual property rights being infringed upon. At least, that's the first thing that comes to my mind, and it is the most likely case an attorney would pursue out of all the possibilities presented and discussed in this situation.

What do you think of the situation? Let me know!

[unwilling-souls-if]

i've been having an itch to write an if game, do you have any tips? i feel like its a very bad idea to jump straight in head first yk?

Ooh 👀 Well, I don't think I'm the most qualified but I can share my experience! I discovered choicescript a few years ago and that's the only coding format I know (Twine makes me cry), but I've only started writing with it like ~2 years ago, and I did jump straight in.

It was, in fact, a bad idea lol 😭 This will be quite rambly so I'll put in under a cut!

I'd say first thing to do is not start out with the project you have in mind if you're not familiar with the format, because it might burn you out or you won't necessarilly find it easy to put it together. Play around with things, write even only a few random scenes, just to taste the waters. I lost interest in my first WIP because i sucked at writing and coding it and it made me lose motivation!

Also, if you're using choicescript, there's the COG forum to help with some specifics code lines! I personnally don't like the forum but you don't need an account to read it and there's a search option. That's a nice resort if you struggle. Reading the wiki and their introduction first is what I did so I had a (very fragile and wonky) base, and then I added to it depending on what I needed.

Also I started writing by following the kinda old instructions of choicescript, aka in a note logiciel on my computer, where lines went on forever 😭It was a pain, so I use CS-IDE now, it makes coding and testing much easier. Basically play around and find what works the best for you. If something doesn't work even after you use it for a bit, it may be worth to find another app/editor/organisation. Personally I write scenes in another app, when's there's a choice to make I outline the possible options and then I copy and paste it in CS-IDE to code.

If you want to use Twine, there are a lot of very talented authors that put up lists of ressources and help! I think you can find them easily on Tumblr. And the IF community is pretty nice, and most people are okay to give out help if you ask for it. Lots of supports around here.

And also, there's the basic advice for all kind of writers. Don't give into pressure, it's okay if things aren't perfect. If a choice branching gives you trouble, you can always leave a placeholder and come back after. Bugs are really common, and most readers understand it.

Honestly it's easier when you have fun with it. I like putting choices that don't do much but give a little insight about characters. I like writing prompts on Tumblr because I can write characters that don't appear for a while. When I get unmotivated I go on Pinterest or Spotify to make boards or playlists. I have lists of fun facts. I think that's why it's best to have a sort of "test" project, so that the struggle can be contained at least a bit and then you can have fun with the story you like most and whose characters you know best.

It'll flow easier. And if doesn't work out, you can give it a rest, revive it later or start anew with another story.

Well, that was a lot of words for not much! i'm half-dead right now, but maybe I'll reblog it later with some links if someone wants to?

In any case, have a lovely day 🌼

[eldritch-spouse]

Hi! I wanted to ask a few things as your art has made me pretty confident about posting mine (I'm getting there!) And I wanted to start drawing + writing yandere OCs of mine but I'm unsure how to start or introduce them (if that makes sense)

While you probably won't answer this or this will get lost in the hundreds of asks you have, I just wanna ask this as I need some suggestions for starters.

Whenever you get this, please make sure to stay hydrated and eat something 💕

This is silly, isn't it?

You've already started posting about your ocs (at least one of them I think). And it seems you've already gathered an audience by making a name for yourself in actual fandoms, so I'm not exactly sure what advice you could possibly want from me- Given I'm mostly just an oc blog, you'll surpass whatever reach I have on your own, automatically basically. People will tune into it much faster, it'll take them less to find you.

I know posting about your own characters can feel embarrassing or "cringe", and honestly, getting over it is something only time allows. Never go into it expecting the same amount of numbers you'd get from talking about mainstream characters, but that's not anything you don't know already.

The way I introduce my characters generally has a cheesy line like "Say hello to ___", a drawing of them, and then either a short fic or a sort of mildly humorous intro about them- But only because that's my style, a goofy side of teratophilia mostly. I think your introductions need to lay your style out first and foremost. I can't exactly tell you what type of information you should put in the intro, because I don't respect the usual "Name: Age: Height: Sexuality: Likes: Dislikes:" formula. It bores me. You seem like a person who enjoys having things very organized, and I feel bad, because my blog is a fucking swamp in comparison and I don't always introduce characters in the same way...

Again, you look like you've been around Tumblr longer than I have, and as such, you can probably write in a way that appeals to a broader range of people (if that's what you're aiming for) much more naturally. In fact, I'd go as far as to say that I'm an awful example to request advice from, because I know the stuff I put out puts me in a "niche". I don't write the more typical yandere things, so I won't get the attention of most. Plus, I have hard kinks. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I think what you need the most is to let things sit. But again, I don't feel qualified to give anyone any sort of advice, considering I often just throw shit at the wall and find out what happens to stick. With no professional/experienced input whatsoever.

I think most people should go into showcasing their ocs with below the ground standards for interactivity. I never did it for the engagement, even if I'm grateful and very surprised, I did it because I love these characters and I thought I should put them somewhere so people could look at them occasionally. Some peeps enjoyed it, and to this day, I don't know why. I wish I could give you a concise formula, but I'm unable to.

I'd say the worst thing you could possibly do is just show an image of them and say "Okay, now feel free to ask about them"- That doesn't seem to garner a lot of attention on its own (unless you already have a large-ish or very interactive following). Make them feel alive, make content on your own about them, don't wait for questions. They will come in their own time.

Good luck, and sorry if I sounded cynical.