#honestly i don't know if i am going to continue with incorrect quotes this just inspired me

[anakinh]

endless ffvii → (29/∞): crisis core incorrect quotes edition

[nobody-nexus]

TADC Incorrect Quotes

(With have Ragatha/Pomni, Jax/Zooble if you squint, and maybe like ONE Jax/Bubble for shits and giggles)

Ragatha: As your best friend— Gangle: Zooble's my best friend? Ragatha, holding a knife: As your best friend—

====

Ragatha: Pomni is at that very special age where an adult only has one thing on their mind Caine: Boys? Pomni: Homicide

====

Pomni: You know what? When I join this friend group, I thought you guys would be dealing with my bullshit Caine, Zooble and Kinger continue screaming about mold water Pomni: Not the other way around! Bubble: I dunno, sounds like you need to drink the mold water :)

====

Gangle: How do Zooble and Jax usually get out of these messes? Ragatha: They don't. They just make a bigger mess that cancels the first one out

====

Ragatha: Just be careful, Pomni! Pomni, heading out the door: I'm always careful, Ragatha! Pomni: It's everything around me that's careless

====

Caine: I truly believe that water can solve all your problems! Gangle: Weight loss? Drink water Ragatha: Clear skin? Drink water Jax: Want to get rid of someone? Drown them.

====

Zooble: Hold on, I can explain Caine: Really? Can you now? Zooble: I can if you give me a minute to think of a convincing lie

====

Caine: You have to apologize to them Jax Jax: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

====

Gangle: I came out here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now

====

Ragatha: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance? Zooble: No. Jax: No. Ragatha: Didn't think so

====

Pomni: Hostage or not, sometimes it’s nice being held Ragatha: Are you okay

====

Zooble: When I get Doordash I order 20 Cheeseburgers at a time and heat them up throughout the week so that I don’t have to pay the delivery fee multiple times Ragatha: I hope you understand how food poisoning works Zooble: I hope food poisoning understands how I work. I never met a burger I couldn’t eat

====

Ragatha: Wake me up- Pomni: Before you go go Gangle: When September ends Caine: WAKE ME UP INSIDE

====

Ragatha, smugly, after security arrives to escort Jax and Pomni out: So, do you wanna walk out of here or do you wanna be carried out? Jax, in defeat: Let’s go Pomni: Wait. Jax: What? Pomni: I’d kinda like to be carried out...

====

Gangle: We have fun, don’t we, Pomni? Pomni: I have never been more stressed out in my entire life

====

Kinger: Hey Ragatha? Ragatha: Yeah? Kinger: What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false? Ragatha: Ragatha: ...What.

====

Jax: How high are you? Pomni: Mm, I don’t know how to say it in feet. Zooble: No, he's asking what drugs are you on Pomni: Oh, antidepressants, why?

====

Caine: It is 6:09 . Caine: I am wondering why I’m still alive. Caine: Send Wendy’s. Pomni: The whole restaurant?!

====

Zooble: I’m the smartest person in this group.... Jax: Really? Then why is your hand stuck in a vending machine? Zooble: I paid for my Mars Bar, I’m getting my Mars Bar.

====

Pomni: Which one of you was going to tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water?? Jax: Y- you were putting it in cold water?? Zooble: Pomni. Answer the question, Pomni. Pomni: Yeah??? I thought people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process. didn't realize there was an actual reason. Pomni: Plus, you think I have the patience to boil water? Jax: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes?? Zooble: Why are you putting it in the microwave to boil it? Jax: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove? Zooble: It takes less than a minute. Jax: Is your stovetop powered by the f#%king sun??? Zooble: How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove? Jax: Like seven minutes?? Gangle: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like 2 minutes... less than that if you use a saucepan! Zooble: Why are you putting the whole mug on the stove?? On medium heat?? Gangle? Your stove is enchanted! Pomni: Every single person here is a f#%king lunatic. Ragatha: Do none of you own a f#%king kettle?

====

Gangle: Guess what I'm about to get! Jax: On my nerves.

====

Zooble: Jax has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all they say now. Everything is deez nuts. They simply can't stop. Zooble: I asked Jax where he learned that joke. He made me promise him wouldn't get in trouble if he told me. I agreed. Zooble: So, he leans in and whispers, "deez nuts."

====

Pomni: HELP! I TOLD RAGATHA I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK! Jax, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

====

Jax: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter A. Ragatha: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory Pomni: F$%k you.

====

Zooble: New challenge! Don't say stupid sh!t for 24 hours!

====

Pomni: Coca Cola is a health potion, Pepsi is a mana potion Ragatha, amused: What’s grape soda? Pomni: It’s f#%king purple baby!!!

====

Zooble: It doesn’t have a bone Jax: Then why is it called a boner?

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Pomni: Can I get a waffle? Caine and Bubble: *fighting and yelling at each other* Pomni: Can I p l e a s e get a waffle?

====

Jax: I committed all 7 deadly sins in 30 minutes Zooble: Wow, I've gotta hear this Jax: I was angry and envious of my neighbor, so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and didn't share Ragatha: You forgot pride Jax: No, I'm pretty proud of this

====

Ragatha, trying to be cute: WOW, Pomni, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How AWFULLY lewd of you. Pomni, confused: We literally slept together yesterday? Ragatha: Eh- sweetie no that's not-

====

Caine: Can we talk about that mass email you sent? Pomni: Why? It was important Caine: All it says is, "I'm back on my sh!t". Jax, shrugging: The people need to know

====

Jax: We’re getting married, bitches! Bubble: And we're about to make it everybody else's problem

[dragons-and-cake123]

PJO Incorrect Quotes

Percy: I have met some of the most insufferable people. But they have also met me.

——

Percy: *trying to buy a Father's Day card at Hallmark*

Percy: Excuse me, do you have any that just say "You are my dad?"

Associate: Well, I-

Percy: How about "You banged my mom?"

Associate: No...

Percy: You know what, I'll just get a blank one.

Percy: *writes* You are a father. This is a day. Here is a card.

——

Percy: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

——

Percy: I have yet to encounter a problem where a sword didn't factor into the solution at least in some way.

——

Percy as a child: I can't wait to grow up and have cool adventures!

Percy now: I can't wait to go to bed.

——

Percy: Of course I have a lot of pent-up rage, you fool! I've been the same height since I was twelve!

——

Percy: Hey, quick question. How petty am I allowed to be?

——

Percy, tearing up the room: Where are they?

Percy, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children?

Percy: Somebody moved my M&M's, and now I am going to start killing.

——

Percy: Sometimes, I don't realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

——

Percy: I love sarcasm! It’s like punching people in the face, but with words!

——

Percy: I'd roast you, but my mom says you can't burn trash.  Percy: *slow-mo walks out of the room*

——

Percy: Helpful grammar tip: “farther” is for physical distance, “further” is for methaphorical distance, and “father” is for emotional distance!

——

Percy, admiring a sleeping Annabeth: You’re so cute. 

Annabeth, sleepily: I could beat your ass. 

Percy, lovingly: I know.

——

Annabeth: If the thought of something makes any of you giggle for longer than 15 seconds, you are to assume you're not allowed to do it.

——

Annabeth: "Ladies and gentlemen" is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly, I'm falling asleep already. 

“Cowards" on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, to the point, and dramatic.

——

Annabeth: as a child, reading their school assignment out loud: I love my library because...  Annabeth, mouthing words while writing: I love reading, fuck you.

——

Annabeth: I keep a picture of all of us in my wallet. Whenever I face difficulties, I take it out and stare at the picture.  The Squad: Awwww-  Annabeth: And I tell myself "If I can deal with these idiots, then I can deal with anything."  The Squad: Oh.

——

Annabeth: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Annabeth lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

——

Annabeth: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

——

Annabeth, to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you’re doing it all wrong.

——

Hazel, playing a video game: How do I play?

*Hazel has drawn first blood!*

*Hazel is on a killing spree!*

*Hazel is on a rampage!*

*Hazel is unstoppable!*

*Hazel is dominating!*

*Hazel is godlike!*

Hazel: Don't worry guys, I figured it out.

——

Leo: No problemo!

Leo, internally: But it was all problemo.

——

Leo: *Plays Slender: The Eight Pages*

*Jumpscare*

Leo: *Jumps back* OH SHIT, IT'S A WHITE GUY!!!

——

Leo: Hello, McDonald's, I would like to purchase 130 chicken nuggets. Prepare yourselves.

——

Leo: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating.

——

Jason: Do you even, cuddle, bro? Do you even lift, bro… each other up with kindness? Do you tell your loved ones that you care about them regardless of who is listening? DO YOU EVER RESOLVE CONFLICTS, EMOTIONAL ISSUES THROUGH COMPROMISE AND COMPASSION RATHER THAN ANGER AND DENIAL?!

——

Jason, looking at the squad: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.

[victorluvsalice]

Valicer Not-Incorrect Quotes, Meet The Family Edition Volume II: Van Dort Visit

Victor: [knocking on the door to Smiler's apartment, fidgeting anxiously] S-smiler? Are -- are you ready to go?

Smiler: [from the other side of the door] Yeah, just a second!

Smiler: [opens the door to reveal that they're wearing -- a plain black suit, white shirt, and black tie]

Victor:

Smiler: ...you okay?

Victor: [blinking and shaking his head] Yes! I-I just -- didn't expect -- [gestures to the outfit] I d-didn't think you owned -- d-don't get me wrong, it is p-probably perfect for visiting Burtonsville and m-meeting my parents, it's only...it looks d-downright funereal.

Smiler: [really awkward smile] Ah -- there's a reason for that...

--

[Context: the trio are being driven by the Van Dorts' chauffeur through the streets of Burtonsville to the Van Dort mansion]

Smiler: [takes a picture of the town and sends it to their friends]

Thirteen: [texting back] Ha ha. Take one without the black-and-white-filter, will you?

Galactica: [texting back] Yeah, be fair, Smiler.

Smiler: [a minute later, texts a picture of themselves and Alice in front of the window, showing that they're in full color]

Galactica: [texting back] WTF???

Thirteen: [texting back] HOLY SHIT HE ACTUALLY LIVES IN A TIM BURTON MOVIE?!

--

[Context: at the mansion, Victor is showing Alice and Smiler around]

Smiler: [staring down another hallway] Sheesh, how many rooms does this place have?

Victor: I'm honestly not sure. More than we could ever need, that's for certain. [rolls his eyes] Have to have room for all of Mother's "treasures..."

Alice: Yes, your mother in particular does seem to be into the conspicuous consumption. [small smile] At least you don't have a gold toilet?

[smash cut to:]

Alice: [staring at a literal gold toilet] Oh my fucking god.

Smiler: [also staring] Is it -- can you --

Victor: Of course not -- do you think my mother would ever allow anyone to befoul her beloved toilet?

Smiler: Rita is going to kill your parents if she ever meets them.

Victor: Please tell her to do so in a way that allows me a proper alibi.

--

[Context: Nell is holding court at tea and complaining about "this modern world"]

Nell: People just don't know their place anymore! Why, just a little while ago, I had the displeasure of dealing with the rudest, most incompetent barista I've ever met!

Victor: [not really paying attention anymore] Did you?

Nell: Yes! Cheeky little bugger didn't seem to understand anything about his job! All I wanted was a few little extras -- the sort a customer is entitled to -- and he couldn't even pour the coffee right!

Victor: [sudden horrified realization] Uh --

Alice: [calmly sipping her tea] That must have been terrible for you.

Smiler: [nodding] I bet you didn't even leave a tip.

Nell: Oh, we never leave tips anyway -- we don't believe in them, isn't that right, William? [William gets half a nod in before she continues] But we paid good money for that coffee, and I expected it to be done right! Not by some half-wit with dyed hair rolling his colored contacts at me!

Smiler: [completely deadpan] How dare they.

Victor: [muttering] Still drank the entire thing, though.

Nell: Not the point! [shaking her head as she returns to her own tea] At least you're not spending all your time with those sorts, Victor. If I knew you were carrying on with a barista I'd die of shame.

Alice: [under her breath] Can we have that in writing?

Victor: [trying very hard not to laugh]

--

Victor: [deep sigh as they all climb in the Van Dort's car to go home] Thank you both for putting up with that.

Alice: It's fine, Victor. They are your parents, and we were going to have to do that eventually.

Victor: I know, just -- I'm sorry. About them. They're -- a-a lot, I know.

Alice: [squeezing his forearm] I imagine you do, yes.

Smiler: Yeah, really. [pause] So, how do you think it's going to take before she finally realizes who I am and dies of shame?

Victor: Considering how much attention she pays to "servants" -- the heat death of the universe.

Alice: I don't think I can wait that long.

Victor: Please don't murder my mother.

Smiler: Yeah, Rita already has dibs.

[lover-boy-liam]

Dazai incorrect quotes

Dazai: Do not come over to my house. If the house is on fire you may knock once, if I don't answer assume set the fire and I want to burn to death.

Dazai: Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn't matter.

I'm going to burn your house down.

Dazai: You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon.

Dazai: It's me.

Shapeshifter: *transforms to look like Dazai*

Dazai: Okay, are you like BLIND? You look nothing like me. First off, l'm way taller. Secondly, I DO NOT look so sleep deprived and lastly, if you could drag comb through that hair you're like a 7 on a good day and I've been told I'm a constant 10.

Dazai: Just took a personality test and got an A+.

Dazai, to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you're doing it all wrong.

Dazai: God has let me live another day and I'm going to make it everyone's problem.

Dazai: I'm sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don't know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet.

Stop making assumptions. It's rude.

Dazai: The 'how the fucks' and 'why are you so dumbs' don't matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

Dazai: A fistfight CAN be romantic.

Dazai: Hello, McDonald's, I would like to purchase 130 chicken nuggets. Prepare yourselves.

Dazai: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating.

Dazai, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'II drink my sorrows away.

Dazai, writing in his diary with a glitter gel pen: I'm losing my sense of humanity. Nothing matters. God is dead. There's blood on my hands.

Dazai: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

Dazai: I warned you.

Dazai: I'm perfect.

Dazai: I'm naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Dazai: Sometimes, don't realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

Dazai: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you?

Dazai: If looking good was a crime, you'd be a law abiding citizen.

Dazai: Well you see, the explanation is perfectly simple and scientific. It was because shut up. Shut up is why.

Dazai: Is this a good idea?

Dazai: Probably not.

Dazai: Do I care?

Dazai: No.

Dazai: I am literally evil incarnate.

Dazai: I'm not actually, I just enjoy being evil.

Dazai: Which I think actually makes it even more evil because l'm making a conscious effort.

Dazai: I came out here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now.

Dazai: STOP!

*Everyone stops*

Dazai: wAiT a MiNuTe-

Dazai: I'm gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.

Dazai: The only straight I am is a straight-up badass.

Dazai, working at McDonald's: Sorry sir, we don't serve a McFuck here, so either you throw that one slice of pickle out or we're gonna have a McProblem.

Dazai: I know your having a panic attack, but get ready for a physical attack

[halfbakedspuds]

OC incorrect quotes

Cause why not. Most of these are mine, btw, the rest are from audio clips I thought fit well.

Adrian: Honestly, I was starting to think you'd sleep in and forget to meet me this morning...

Lyanni: Wouldn't have forgotten if I was sleeping with you.

Adrian: ...But look at thi- Jesus

Adrian: I don't know, hey. I've just had this massive recurring headache for a few weeks now.

Lyanni: *Literally just walks into the room

Adrian: And there she is...

Lyanni: I know two hundred ways of killing a man.

Adrian: You can tie a bucket filled with rats to their stomach and heat it up so that the only way the rats can escape is by eating through their guts.

Lyanni: ... two hundred and one, plus a mental note to never piss you off.

(Watching Lyanni in a tavern brawl against eight other people)

Evelyn: Should we perhaps go help her, Sir?

Adrian: *Getting his camera out* Why'd we do that?

Evelyn: Maybe 'cause it's about to go from a barfight to a bloody street brawl?

Adrian: *Starts filming* Nah, she's got this. Kick him in the balls, Blosjin!

Evelyn: Well that was horrifying. Has anyone got the number of a good therapist?

Evelyn: Wait, fuck, I'm the therapist, aren't I?

Adrian: Where are my fucking guns?

Lyanni: Language, Starman.

Adrian: My utmost apologies, but may I humbly request ascertainment as to the location of my fucking firearms?

Adrian: I'm bi, which means I'm 10% attracted to men, 10% attracted to women...

Adrian: *points at Lyanni over his shoulder* ...and 80% attracted to that dumbass over there.

Lyanni: Life is like a game of chess...

Adrian: ... We both suck at it.

Strax: I sleep with a Nucleic Destabiliser in my room.

Evelyn: I sleep with a Dahltech 308 special under my pillow.

Wilhelm: I sleep with a gravity rifle under my bed.

Adrian: Amateurs.

Evelyn: Alright then, boss, enlighten us to the deadly weapon you sleep with?

Adrian: *Smirking and taking a deep breath* Lyanni Sverik... and my revolvers.

Lyanni: I just don't understand why he's being such an arse about this mission.

Evelyn: *Fixing the gun on her warsuit* Well, maybe it's because deep down he cares about you and is afraid you'll get hurt or killed but is too emotionally repressed to know how to say anything about it.

Everyone:

Evelyn: Oh, was I... not supposed to say that out loud?

Wilhelm: I, for one, love that you did. Please, do continue.

Lyanni: And then he took his shirt off, and like my body had a reaction...

Evelyn: Please keep this to yourself, I don't need to hear about that.

Lyanni: I was just sitting there like "Boy, how in the hells are you still alive?'

Evelyn: ...

Evelyn: Okay, native, you have my attention now.

Adrian: *Showing Lyanni how to use a gun* in this line of work, you'll quickly see a lot of people become priests.

Lyanni: ...what?

Adrian: Extra holey.

Adrian: Let me be Frank-

Lyanni: Who's Frank?

Evelyn: Shush, I want to hear what Frank here has to say.

Adrian: Throne, give me patience instead of strength because I will strangle this lot if you give me strength...

Some random IUC guard: *To Adrian* Someone should put freaks like you in a mental hospital.

Lyanni: *Frothing at the mouth, barely being held back by Adrian* Someone should put you in a box floating down the river, grandma!

(Wilhelm and Adrian's first meeting in a nutshell)

Wilhelm: Who the fuck are you?

Adrian: Who the fuck am I? Who the fuck are you?!

Wilhelm: Better question, why the fuck are you?

Lyanni in her cell: I'll do both of you boys one better: How the fuck are ya'll and where the fuck am I?

Lyanni: I work fine under pressure.

Adrian: I mean no disrespect, Velsjen, but I've tread on landmines that handled pressure better than you do.

Lyanni: I want to wake up to your face every day for the rest of my life.

Adrian: You do realise that I'm up two hours before dawn almost daily, right?

Lyanni:...

Lyanni: I want to see your face at some point every day for the rest of my life.

Edit: posted without tags. Eto bleh

[justahumanmachine]

Incorrect Quote Tag!!!

I was tagged by @corethomas. Hello corethomas!!!

Anyway heres some incorrect quotes i have accumulated over the years. This will be your first introduction to my little guys. Have fun.

~~~

Azure: What doesn't kill me better start running, because now I'm fucking pissed.

~~~

Mara: I hope you know what you’re doing.

Azure: Nope, but I’m doing it anyway.

~~~

Virgil: Hey, I'm cool. I can be cool. Nothing gets through this rock hard exterior. I'm a tough dude, isn't that right, Azure?

Azure: The other day you cried because I punched a seagull.

~~~

Virgil: It’s really muggy out today.

Azure: If I go outside and all the mugs are on the lawn, I will kill you.

Virgil: (Sips tea from a bowl)

~~~

Azure: I have high standards. If I’m going to have a girlfriend, I want her to be strong, graceful, intelligent-

Pallas: (trips over her own feet and falls into a garbage can)

Azure:

Azure: I want that one

~~~

Virgil: The human body is seventy percent water. We’re basically cucumbers with anxiety.

Fey: Excuse you, with the amount fo salt and alcohol I consume, I’m more of an anxiety pickle.

~~~

Pallas: I’ve never smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once at a party. It was intense. It was kind of indescribable. I felt like I was floating. Turns out there was no pot in the brownie. It was just an insanely good brownie.

~~~

Octavian: Still don’t have the slightest clue what’s going on here, but I fully endorse this turn of events!

~~~

Felix: You may be asking, “Felix, how did you do this to yourself?”

Felix, struggling to get his leg out of a chair: Well, kids, Felix has no freaking clue either.

~~~

Felix: Octavian, you almost died!

Octavian: Don’t worry, Virge said all the bleeding was internal.

Octavian: That’s where the blood’s supposed to be.

~~~

Lyrian: I don't follow the rules. I follow dogs on social media.

~~~

Lyrian: Me? Well, I’m open to the idea.

Octavian: Why on earth would you be open to the idea?

Lyrian: Because I worship chaos.

~~~

Virgil: Sanyi, aren’t you supposed to be in hiding? Meaning you don’t go out randomly to buy hamburgers?

~~~

Sanyi: I am not a whore, and, not that I’ve done the math, but, if I were, I’d be the super classy kind that gets flown to Dubai to stay in an underwater hotel.

~~~

Tian, holding up her class notes: And then this doodle of a burrito because when I first read Aristotle, I thought it was pronounced like “Chipotle.”

Tian, in shock: Wait a minute, is it “Chip-o-tottle?”

~~~

Tian: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.

~~~

Mara: Did you tell anyone we’re married?

Fey: Yes, I have no self control and told the foreign ambassador we’re married.

Mara: Okay, no need to be sarcastic.

Winona: No, she actually told me you were married.

~~~

Rose: I came out here to attack people and I'm honestly having such a good time right now.

~~~

Lyrian: Yum, thanks!

Rose, who has kidnapped her: *puts more tape over their mouth* I said stop eating it.

~~~ Azure: I have no respect for Santa. Don’t sneak in through the chimney and undermine my authority by bringing my family presents. Walk in through the front door and fight me like a man.

~~~

Sanyi: Just took a personality test and got an A+.  ~~~

Octavian: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

~~~

Lyrian: The ‘how the fucks’ and 'why are you so dumbs’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new gun.

~~~

Rose: Get in, loser, we’re committing vehicular manslaughter!

~~~

Azure as a child, reading her school assignment out loud: I love my library because...

Azure, mouthing words while writing: I love reading, fuck you.

~~~

And that’ll be all! Everyone I know has already done this already so uh no tags I guess, but if @corethomas and @jasperygrace want to go for round two, hell yeah.

[damianwaynewife]

Incorrect Quotes Compilation

Warnings: contains swearing

A/n: This is a compilation of Incorrect Quotes I saved in my drafts and also Happy New Year. Happy reading

Damian: *walking around disappointed after visiting an aquarium* Y/n: Damian, what did you think a tiger shark was? Damian: A hybrid of a tiger and a shark Y/n: Yep, you need to be sent to a mental asylum

-

-

-

Jon: *coughs blood* Y/n: Don't die, Jon! Jon: Don't tell me what to do!

-

-

-

Clarke: Where's Y/n, Jon, and Damian? Bruce: They're playing hide and seek. Clarke: Where? Bruce: I don't think you get how this game works.

-

-

-

Y/n: Who the f*** broke the toaster? Tim: It was Jason. Damian: It was Jason. Bruce: Jason broke it. Jason: ... Jason: ...yOU PROMISED-

-

-

-

Damian: Uh, I think I got your lunch. *Holds up a note that says: ‘I am very proud of you. Love, Y/n’* Jon: Oh yeah. I don't think this was for me. *Holds up a note that says: ‘Be good. For the love of God, Please be good.*

-

-

-

Bruce: Can I have some water? Jason: *starts chugging their water bottle* Jason: *chokes from drinking too quickly* Jason: *spills water all over himself* Jason, coughing: I don't have any water.

-

-

-

Y/n: ARE YOU- Damian: F***ing. Y/n: KIDDING ME?! YOU- Damian F***ing. Y/n: IDIOT! Jon: …What was that? Damian: Father banned Beloved from swearing, so I’m helping her out.

-

-

-

Y/n, tearing up the room: Where are they? Y/n, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children? Y/n: Somebody moved my cookies, and now I am going to start killing.

-

-

-

Y/n: I'm going the fight the next person who insults Jon. Jon: I hate myself. Y/n: Alright, square up b*tch.

-

-

-

Kor'Í: But what about Y/n? Dick: Don't worry about them. Dick: I once watched her fall down 5 flights of stairs, stand up, and keep eating a hotdog like nothing happened.

-

-

-

Y/n: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!! Tim: N/n- Tim: It- it was just an ant-

-

-

-

Jason: Y/n... you've been cuddling with me for over an hour now. Y/n: *muffled* mm hmmm :) Jason: F***. I should be annoyed but you're freaking cute.

-

-

-

Y/n: You deserve a reward for putting up with me. Damian: You are my reward, Beloved *meanwhile* Dick: You deserve a reward for putting up with me. Bruce: True, you can be really difficult at times. Dick: Why you bully me?

-

-

-

Damian: Guys where did Todd go? Y/n: He got arrested. Damian: How the hell- Jason: *bursts in through the window* The cops are after me, I thought it would be fun to steal pie and throw them at people.

-

-

-

Y/n: Any idiot would know that. Dick: I knew that! Y/n: See? Dick: Wait wha-

-

-

-

Y/n: *comes up with an idea* Batman impressed: Huh, you've got something there! Nightwing, under their breath: Yeah, a lawsuit.

-

-

-

Y/n: Your future self is talking s*** about you right now. Joker: Jokes on them. I'll ruin their f***ing life.

-

-

-

Roy: What do rainbows mean to you? Jason: Gay rights *winks at Roy* Damian: There's money. Tim: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole Earth with a flood, *whispers to himself* I honestly wish he did Y/n: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops. Roy: English, please. Y/n: *sighs* Nevermind, you're too dumb to understand.

-

-

-

Damian: What’s your favorite color? Bruce: Stop asking such absurd questions. Ask me something logical and mature for once. Damian: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP? Bruce: My favorite color is blue.

-

-

-

Jon: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much. Damian: Oh, you’ve been? Jon: Once. In Monopoly.

-

-

-

Y/n: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it. Y/n: And I started thinking. Y/n: Like, it was just trying to get food. Y/n: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck? *starts to cry* Y/n: I am such a bad person. I'm a murderer Bruce: Is she ok? *looks at Damian* Damian: She's on her period.

-

-

-

Joker: Any questions? Y/n: Uh, yeah, WHAT THE F*** WAS THAT? Joker: Uh, a plan, duh... Harley: Y/n, chill, I know it’s weird, but Puddin' has a point. Y/n: Y/n: THAT WAS LITERALLY A PONY DOODLE WITH A HAT AND A F***ING CLOWN NOSE!!

-

-

-

Tim: Why does my arm shake and turn bright red when I’m eating dirt? Y/n: Y/n: Why are you eating dirt? Tim: Did I ask you if I should eat dirt? No, so answer my god damn question.

-

-

-

Y/n: If you water water, it grows. Damian: ...What. Tim: They've got a point.

-

-

-

Tim: We can’t tell you because you’re not a member of the club. Damian: What club? Y/n: The hating Damian club. Damian: …The f***? I should be the leader of that club!

-

-

-

Tim: We vegetarians love the environment. Carnivores are sick freaks. Y/n: How can vegetarians possibly love the environment... you keep eating all the f***ing plants.

-

-

-

Y/n: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your god damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Y/n lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

-

-

-

Y/n: Do you cook? Damian: I made a cake once. Tim: Yeah, it was good. Damian: Really? Tim: Don’t make me lie twice, Damian.

[justnerdthings]

Just a collection of Alex, Echo, and Jo incorrect quotes from a generator.

Jo: Some people are like slinkies. Echo: What? Jo: Not really good for much but bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs. Echo: Echo: Please don't push Alex down the stairs. Jo, pushing Alex down the stairs: Too late.

-------------

Alex: A party is a celebration of a life, bringing people together to let the guest of honor know how much they’re loved. Echo has done so much for us. This is our chance to do something for them. Jo: By forcing them to have fun at a party that they don’t want to be at? Alex: I knew you’d understand.

----------------

Alex: We're having a baby. Echo: Oh, congradu- Jo, slamming adoption papers onto the table: It's you, sign here.

----------------

Echo: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter a. Jo: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory. Alex: Fuck you.

----------------

Echo: *gets a text* Oh! It’s Alex. Jo, excitedly: Did they get me the stuff? Echo: Yeah, they say they got you the clown costume, the power drill, and 12 gallons of blood. Jo: Wow! Where’d they find 12 gallons of fake blood? Echo: You wanted fake blood? Jo: Echo: I’ll go call Alex.

----------------

Alex: Nice rock. Jo: Thanks, Echo gave it to me. Echo: I threw it at you! Jo: Aren't they the sweetest?

-----------------

Alex: Who wants to make fifty bucks? Jo: How? Alex: I need someone to take the fall. Jo: What did you do? Alex: I can't tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked. Echo, from the other room: Oh my god. Alex: ... Echo: OH MY GOD! Jo: Make it a hundred. Alex: Deal.

------------------

Echo: So, what is Jo to you? Alex: The reason I wake up every morning. Echo: ...That’s adorable. Jo earlier that morning, barging into Alex′s room, smacking pans together: WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!

------------------

Alex: I mean. Echo's just standing there now. Alex: Waiting for me, I guess. Alex: But it's okay, I think they've pretty much settled down. Jo: Settled down? Alex: Well, they only stabbed me once.

------------------

Jo: Can we go out to get icecream? Alex: Did you ask Echo? Jo: They said no. Alex: Then why did you ask me? Jo: They're not the boss of you. Alex, internally: It's a trap, it's a trap, it's a trap.

------------------

Echo: Would you slap Alex- Jo: Yes. Echo: I didn't even finish! Jo: Sorry, continue. Echo: Would you slap Alex for 10 dollars? Jo: I would do it for free. Alex: Rude...

------------------

Echo: Is this your plan B? Alex: Technically, this is plan P. Echo: Plan P? Is there a plan M? Alex: Yes, but I marry Jo in plan M. Jo: I like plan M.

------------------

Echo: The moon looks beautiful, doesn’t it? Alex, looking at Echo: Yeah… but do you know what’s more beautiful? Echo and Alex in unison: *sighs* Jo

------------------

Alex: So are you gonna explain how the hell you crashed my car? Jo: Well we were driving and there was a deer in the road, so I said "Echo, deer!" Alex: ...And what did Echo do? Jo: ...They said "Yes, Honey?"

------------------

Echo: Did Jo just tell me they loved me for the first time? Alex: Yeah, they did. Echo: And did I just do finger guns back? Alex: Yeah, you did.

------------------

Echo, at Jo: Would you like to stay for dinner? Alex, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!

------------------

Echo talking at Alex’s funeral: You do know we’re burying a great person today! Jo, shocked: Did someone else die?

------------------

Echo: Hey I just got a pet snake. What should I name him? Alex: A pet WHAT?! Jo: William Snakespeare.

------------------

Alex: Jo has no survival skills, their need to win has replaced them. Echo: That can't be true! Alex: Watch this. Alex: Hey Jo, race you to the bottom of the stairs! Jo: *Throws themself out a window*

-------------------

Alex: What are you guys doing? Echo: Like in life in general or- Jo: Not much. Why, what's up? Alex: I dunno, I’m bored playing AC. Jo: Assassins Creed? Alex: Animals Creed. Echo: Assassins Crossing.

-------------------

Echo: How are we supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Alex without them noticing? Jo: Hey, Alex, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny. Alex: *takes and swallows tracker* Pay up, loser. Echo: ...

-------------------

Alex: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed. Echo: Echo: I'm gonna tell them. Jo: Don't you dare.

--------------------

Echo: What time is it? Jo: I don’t know, pass me that saxaphone and we’ll find out Jo: *BLASTS the saxaphone* Alex: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXAPHONE AT TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING Jo: It’s 2 am

--------------------

Alex: Would you take a bullet for me? Echo: ...yes? *Jo angrily burst into the room* Alex: *running away* Great, thanks!

-------------------

Jo: What makes you think it's okay to watch Hannibal given its subject matter? Echo: Sometimes, I watch television shows for entertainment purposes. Alex: Because I condone murder and cannibalism.

-------------------

Alex: Welcome to Fucking Applebees, do you want apples or bees? Echo: Bees? Alex: THEY HAVE SELECTED THE BEES! Echo: Wait- *Jo approaches, shaking a jar of bees menacingly*

-------------------

Echo: Jo and I were crossing the street, and this man drove by and honked at us. Alex: What did you do? Echo: Jo chased him to the next red light, and reached into his window, and- Jo: *walking in* Who wants a steering wheel?

-------------------

Jo: I lost Echo. Alex: How did you LOSE Echo?! Jo: To be fair, they are very small.

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Echo: Who do we know that has handcuffs? Alex: Well Jo and I- Jo: *elbows Alex* Alex: ...wouldn't know.

-------------------

Jo: What’s it like being tall? Jo: Is it nice? Jo: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards? Alex: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb 4 chairs, 2 boxes, a small coffee table and 6 oddly placed stools to get what they want. Echo: It was one time!

-------------------

Jo: I told Alex that their ears turn red when they lie. Echo: Do they? Jo: No. Echo: Then why did you tell them that? Jo: Because I can do this. Jo: Hey Alex! Do you love us? Alex, with their hands over their ears: No.

-------------------

Jo: Is Alex always like this when they lose? Echo: Oh, yes. You should've been there for the Great Jenga Tantrum of 2015. Alex: You bumped that table and you know it!

-------------------

Alex: Goddamn it, the printer broke while printing out Echo's birthday invitations. Jo: Well, what are they supposed to say? Alex: "Echo's birthday". Jo: So, what do they say instead? Alex: "Echo’s bi". Jo: Jo: Works out either way.

------------------

Echo: Alex got into a fight. Jo: That’s bad. Jo: Jo: Did they win?

-----------------

Echo: I’ve never asked someone out. How do you even do it? Jo: Oh, what I do is, I look them up and down and I say: “Hey… how you doin’?” Alex, scoffing: Oh, please. Jo, to Alex: Hey, how you doin’? Alex: Alex: *giggles and blushes*

------------------

Echo: That shirt looks great, Alex. Alex: Thanks. Echo: But I bet it would look even better on Jo's floor. Jo: Are you hitting on Alex... for me?

------------------

Echo: Hey, do you know the password to Alex’s computer? Jo: Fuck you, Echo. Echo: Hey!! Jo: No, you misunderstood, the password is "fuckyouEcho". Echo: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

-------------------

Jo: Hi, sorry I’m late. I was doing a couple of things and got distracted. Alex: I’m “a couple of things”. Echo: I’m “got distracted”.

-------------------

*playing twister* Echo: Right hand red. Jo: *ends up on top of Alex* Alex: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you? Echo: I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice.

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Jo: Where are my fucking keys? Alex: Jo, Echo is around, can you say it a little nicer? Jo: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my FUCKING KEYS?!

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Alex: A sprite is anything not static. Echo: A sprite is a variable object, be it 2d or 3d. Jo: A sprite is a fucking soda. Jo: You god damn geekass bastards.

---------------------

Jo: Echo! What did I tell you about lying? Echo, looking down: ...That it only works on Alex.

---------------------

Echo: What are you writing? Alex: The government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. I'm letting them know it's private information. Jo, looking over Alex's shoulder: This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy.

--------------------

Echo: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?! Alex: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long line of violence. Echo: Oh... Jo, from across the room: I don’t understand how you keep forgetting that.

-------------------

Alex: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like... a lawyer to you. Ok? Echo: Okay. *later* Jo: Echo! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble. Alex, whispering: Deny everything. Echo, loudly: That isn't a chair.

------------------

Jo: Why do you let me win when we race up the stairs? You’re the faster one. Alex: Erm... it’s nice see your smile when you win! *later* Jo: They're probably just staring at my ass, aren't they. Echo: Yeah, probably.

-------------------

Echo: *speaking Spanish* Jo: I know, I know. Alex: You speak Spanish? Jo: No. I just know the phrase, 'this is all your fault' in every language Echo speaks.

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Jo: Alex, what are you doing? Alex: Making chocolate pudding. Jo: It's four in the morning, why are you making chocolate pudding? Alex: Because I've lost control of my life. Alex: Here's your pudding, Echo. Echo: Oh that's okay, I'm not hungry anymore.

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Alex: I know you love them. Echo: I am not in love with Jo! Alex, staring at Echo: I never said who... Echo: *realizes* Echo: Shit. Well, anyways-

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Echo: Coca Cola can remove rust from metal, imagine what it’s doing to your body. Jo: Pfff, getting rid of the rust, idiot. Echo: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS! Alex: Hmm... I've been drinking soda and my body's rust free... not sure where you're getting your facts from...

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Jo: Yo dumbass, get over here. Echo: Okay- Alex: *gleefully runs past* I’m coming! Echo, sadly: I thought... I was dumbass...

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Jo: But what about Alex? Echo: Don't worry about them. Echo: I once watched them fall down 5 flights of stairs, stand up, and keep eating their hotdog like nothing happened.

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Echo: I hope you have an explanation for this. Alex: We have three actually- Jo: Pick your favorite.

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Alex, to Echo: You know, Jo can be really aggressive, so it's important to take all the necessary precautions when approaching. Alex: *blows airhorn at Jo* GET FUCKED!

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Echo & Alex: *accidentally set the kitchen on fire* Echo: We need an adult! Alex: Echo, you are an adult! Echo: We need an adultier adult! Get Jo!

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Jo: Are you a painting? Alex: What-? Jo: Because I want to pin you to a wall. Echo: OH GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY YOU WANTED TO HANG THEM OR SOMETHING-

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Alex, bursting into the room: You two are having sex! Jo, not looking up from their book: Really? Echo, why didn’t you tell me? I would have put my book down.

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Alex, excitedly: Heeyy!! Echo: Hey, someone's excited. Jo, deadpan: Yeah, and it's making me sick.

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Echo: When Alex has daiquiris they get really into how beautiful they are. Alex: Hey, I dare you guys to dare us to make out. Jo: Hey Alex, you know that’s a mirror, right?

-------------------

@chadillacboseman @roofgeese

[dadtrap-the-nonbinary-pirate]

Have some incorrect quotes from my AU Zim, Tallest Red and Tallest Purple part 1.

Tallest Purple: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.

Tallest Red, used to Tallest Purple being dumb: Sure...

Tallest Purple: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.

Tallest Red: Okay?

Tallest Purple: Lasagna is just spaghetti flavored cake.

Tallest Red: ...

Tallest Purple: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio-

Tallest Red: Jesus, that last one is a little-

Zim, interested: No, no, Tallest Purple, keep going.

......

Tallest Purple: I dare you-

Tallest Red: Zim is not allowed to accept dares anymore.

Tallest Purple: Why not?

Zim: "I have no regard for my own or others personal safety", as some would say.

......

Tallest Purple: The odds of this happening by coincidence are vanishingly small.

Tallest Red: I would say infinitesimally.

Zim: And I'd say teenily-weenily. We all know words.

......

Tallest Purple: We need to open this locked door. Red, give me your credit card.

Tallest Red: Here.

Tallest Purple, pocketing it: Thanks. Zim, break down the door.

......

Tallest Purple: Zim, I am questioning your sanity...

Tallest Red: I never questioned it, I knew their sanity was missing from the start.

......

Tallest Red: Who knew getting in trouble would be so impossible?

Zim: I gotta give you credit, Tallest Purple. You make it look easy.

Tallest Purple: Years of practice.

......

Tallest Red: Okay, can we all stop saying stupid sh*t for a moment, please?!

Tallest Purple: Alright.

Zim: Hey, I-

Tallest Red: SHUT UP!

Zim: I HAVEN'T EVEN FINISHED MY SENTENCE!!

Tallest Purple: It was bound to be stupid.

......

*Tallest Red is casually searching around the room*

Zim: Hey Tallest Red, what're you looking for?

Tallest Red: My will to live.

*Tallest Purple walks into the room*

Tallest Red: Oh, there it is!

......

Tallest Purple: Guess what number I'm thinking of.

Zim: 420?

Tallest Purple: No, that's really immature of you. Someone else guess, and please take this seriously.

Tallest Red: 69.

Tallest Purple: Yeah it was 69.

......

Tallest Red to Zim: Me? I'm the bees knees, but, you? Your just...

Tallest Purple: Cockroach ankles!

Tallest Red: Ye- uh, what?

......

Tallest Red: Zim, what do you have?

Zim: A KNIFE!

Tallest Red: Okay, have fu-

Tallest Purple: NO

......

Tallest Red: Hey, Zim. Why did the chicken cross the road?

Zim: To get to the other side?

Tallest Red: You were supposed to say "I dunno, why?"

Zim: Uh... fine. I don't know. Why did it cross the road?

Tallest Purple: To get to the idiot's house.

Zim: ...Ok?

Tallest Red: Hey, Zim. Knock knock.

Zim: No.

Tallest Red: You were supposed to say "who's there?"

Zim: Fine... let's get this over with. Who's there?

Tallest Red: The chicken.

Zim: ...

Tallest Red: ...

Tallest Purple: ...

Zim: Listen here you tall shits

......

Tallest Red: How are you supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Zim without them noticing?

Tallest Purple: Hey, Zim, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny.

Zim: *takes and swallows tracker* Pay up, loser.

Tallest Red: ...

......

Tallest Purple: I think Zim is in trouble.

Tallest Red: Alright. Struggling to give a f*ck, if I'm honest.

......

(They've become more self aware of what I'm doing but will continue to follow the rules)

Tallest Red: I honestly feel like some of our conversations are almost word-for-word accurate to the generator.

Tallest Purple: Yup.

Tallest Red: Maybe the generator is watching us.

Zim: Wouldn't that imply this conversation will be added?

Zim: ...

Zim: Wait-

......

Tallest Purple: Would you take a bullet for me?

Tallest Red: ...yes?

*Zim angrily bursts into the room*

Tallest Purple: *running away* Great, thanks!

......

Tallest Red: Godd*mn it, the printer broke while printing out Tallest Purple's birthday invitations.

Zim: Well, what are they supposed to say?

Tallest Red: "Tallest Purple's birthday".

Zim: So, what did they say instead?

Tallest Red: "Tallest Purple's bi".

Zim: ...

Zim: Works out either way.

......

(Zim being the little sh!t he is)

Zim, grinning: Before you were what?

Tallest Purple: Before I was-

Zim: What?

Tallest Purple: Before I was inter-

Zim: Before you were interrupted?

Tallest Purple: Cut me off one more time I swear I'll-

Zim: What?

Tallest Purple: *makes a frustrated irken noise*

Tallest Red, nervously: Stop that. Before they hurt you.

(It's not pretty when Tallest Purple's buttons are pushed to the limit)

......

Tallest Purple: I told Tallest Red that their antennas turn blue when they lie.

Zim: do they?

Tallest Purple: No.

Zim: Then why did you tell them that?

Tallest Purple: Because I can do this.

Tallest Purple: Hey Tallest Red! Do you love us?

Tallest Red, with their hands over their Antennas: No.

......

Tallest Purple: Hey I got a pet snake. What should I name him?

Tallest Red: A pet WHAT?!

Zim: William Snakespeare.

......

Tallest Purple: What are you writing?

Tallest Red: The government wants to know what kind of weapons we have in the house. I'm letting them know it's private information.

Zim, looking over Tallest Red's shoulder: This just says 'f*ck around and find out' in calligraphy.

......

Tallest Purple: Why were you up yesterday until 3:00 am?

Zim: How did you know I was up until 3:00 am?

Tallest Red: We could hear you clapping to the F•R•I•E•N•D•S intro every 25 minutes.

......

Tallest Red: Hey, did you know as a kid I accidentally ate paper?

Zim: I feel like we've all done that at least once.

Tallest Purple: I ate it too-

Zim: See?

Tallest Purple: -on purpose...

Tallest Red & Zim: ...What?

......

Tallest Red: They can't make me admit France exists, right? Legally, that's not allowed.

Tallest Red: Sure, if France was REAL I'd say I liked it.

Tallest Red: But who's to say.

Zim: I think France isn't real.

Tallest Purple: Zim, you've been to France.

Zim: And???

......

Zim: I feel like Tallest Red is looking down on me.

Tallest Purple: That's because they're near the counter and you're short.

......

Tallest Purple: Bet you can't eat 15 crayons!

Zim: Bet you I can!

Tallest Red: *sips coffee, checks to make sure 911 is still on speed dial, and goes back to reading the paper*

......

Tallest Purple: I have a bad feeling about this...

Zim: What do you mean?

Tallest Purple: Don't you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if you're going to get into trouble?

Zim: No?

Tallest Red: That actually explains so much.

......

Tallest Purple: Without ugly, there would be no beauty in this world.

Tallest Red: Thank you for your sacrifice, Zim.

......

Tallest Purple: I lost Zim.

Tallest Red: How did you LOSE Zim?!

Tallest Purple: To be fair, they are very small.

......

*In the chip aisle at Walmart, doing a late-night grocery run.*

Zim: *Minding their own business, looking for tortilla chips*

Zim: *Finds tortilla chips*

Tallest Red, to Tallest Purple: See, they know what they're here for. They know what they're doing. Be more like them. Make a decision, Purple!

......

Tallest Red: Sometimes I like to place my hands on someone's cheeks, look into their eyes...

Tallest Red: ...And violently jerk their head until it snaps.

Zim: ... That took an unexpected turn.

Tallest Purple: So did their neck.

.......

Tallest Purple: Are you drunk?

Tallest Red: Only on the spirit of Christmas!

Zim: And the spirit of whisky.

[scoundrels-in-love]

Hey love !! was going to start with 12, but you just answered it... So 22, 24, (what fuck is it the 32?... o.O'), 56, 74 (I saw that you have some in the other ask that you answered ;D) , 75, 78 (since it's your favorite food), 82, 95, 116 (and what), 119, 133 (I know how much you care about them), 135 and 148 (do you even have one? It's okay if you don't)... sorry I'm a curious person :X

22. Where would you like to travel? 

Honestly, nowhere and everywhere. Like, I am anxious and just, I am not sure how I could handle flying, etc. But there are things I want to see. I want to see Venice, when it is crowded and blinding in summer sun and when the rush is over and I can wander through quieter corners and speak to the ancient walls. I want to see Canada, from its vast wilderness to its towns. I want to get to know New Zealand, how its magnificent nature shifts in hues through the seasons. I wish to fly over Lake Michigan... I want to see more of my own homeland, too. And to visit my friends. There is so much that sometimes it aches, so I tell myself that I don’t want it all anyway.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

I do not have a daily routine, which is probably part of all problems I have. But I like the time I can sit down and be with my mom or my friends. To laugh, to discuss world and life for all the bad and good of it, to make stupid jokes, just be myself. That’s best part of my day.

(Seriously what is the 32 LOL wow)

56. Favourite colour?

Black and purple on same spot, followed by silver and green, then blue. Never the neon shades, though.

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

A.... Lot. Too many than its sensible. 99% of them are second hand, so they were literally cents, especially in my early childhood. So, yeah, I actually have a huge collection of teddy bears. There’s bunch of owls too (mom’s and my favorite birds) and recently, I acquired cutest black panther plush I call Blueberry (since our word for the berry is more like Blackberry).

75. Favourite animal?

This is hard to narrow down, because I love all animals. But overall, cats always win. Big cats included. And from those, my very top fave is caracal.

It’s medium sized, lives in Africa, Middle East, Central Asia and India. They are incredibly expressive and amazing jumpers (can catch a bird midflight essentially, cause they can leap over 3 meters in air) and honestly, they’re just drop dead gorgeous in every aspect. Plus, they are very intelligent and can be tamed to be used like a hunting partner and are actually very gentle with nomadic tribe children, etc. Due to their adorable ear tufts, they’re often thought to be lynxes, but they’re completely different species and have eight subspecies of their own.

TL;DR - I love them a lot since first time I saw a picture of them.

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

I genuinely can’t pick. Any I will eat will be my favorite at that time, LOL. Though recently, local company released apple+plum ice cream on a stick with sweet coating and oh lord it’s absolutely divine.

82. Favourite movie?

This is a hard one, I can’t say I have one by default, but something that has stayed me since childhood and that later made special memories with my mom is Fly Away Home. And Rogue One is a strong contender, in a different way.

95. Last movie you watched?

Steel Rain, a kmovie that left be feeling both frustrated and just empty and sad.

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Absolutely. Brandi Carlile - Hard Way Home. A friend linked to me this as unlikely listening that they ended up digging, and honestly same.

119. Favourite book?

Answered here at very bottom!

133. Favourite lyrics right now? 

Booyyyy that’s such a hard pick. Such a hard pick.

But one of the top ones right now are Ten’s New Heroes

“Turn my mess into messagesLearn from the lessonsAnd keep on keep on keep on”

This is something I try to myself, something I try to keep to. Because it’s so hard to do, but so necessary.

The entirety of Halestorm’s I am the Fire for same reason.

And oh boy, I could share so much of Emilie Autumn’s and Nightwish’s lyrics.as well. I will refrain myself, though.

From Nightwish - Nemo“Oh how I wishFor soothing rainAll I wish is to dream againMy loving heartLost in the darkFor hope I'd give my everything“

Honestly, this really depends on my mood and time in my life, but nearly all of my favorite songs in a way have a favorite lyrics of mine.135. Dumbest lie you ever told?I genuinely hate lying and try not to lie, and if I do, it’s kind of white lies/trying to salvage situation or not to be as blunt as I can be. And I forget them really fast as it’s not something I have to keep in mind for continuity purposes. So, probably something along those lines! 148. What’s your favourite quote?Duuuuuuuude. I always end up reading things that I think, wow this is going to be a favorite quote of mine and then I forget it in a blink. I hate it, with passion. Something that’s more of a saying than quote that has stuck with me is “Better later than never” and I think that only shows how much of procrastinator I am. And boy, kdramas are riddled with amazing quotes. Like JBL with “Just because someone cries the loudest does not mean they suffer the most.” -  this is very from my memory and incorrect, but you get the gist. I think it encompasses just how much we like to sweep silent suffering under rug, because dealing with it - as the person suffering and as bystander - but it in no way is lesser, less painful or hard than someone’s who wails their heart out. It reminds to keep us empathy for everyone and just... Yeah.

Thank you again so much for asking!!