#honestly im just rambling/venting

[rigelmejo]

Anyone else intimidated by the new HSK 3.0? https://goeastmandarin.com/new-hsk-levels/

Upon some digging, it appears the HSK will first add the new 7-9 levels for people who want it. Then afterward, gradually transition the original 1-6 levels from the old version to new version. So for now, HSK 1-6 are the same. And from what I'm finding, while HSK 4 and 5 maybe got a bit harder in the new version (more hanzi and words pet level), HSK 6 got a bit easier (less unique hanzi and words) so it evens out to probably around the same amount of content from HSK 1-6 just with a somewhat more even distribution of content between each level. So maybe that's good? Because I was not planning to purposely study 5000 words I hadn't considered before... outside of old (current) HSK 6 and below, I mostly learn words from media and conversations. If there's even more core HSK vocab to eventually study... I know there's like 11,000 words in rhe new HSK 1-9, so around 5,000 brand new words in HSK 7-9, and 1/3 of vocab in each level 1-6 seems to be new. So there's just.... a lot more vocab to learn to pass...

Another intimidating thing: the need to write characters, and translate, on the tests. As a self studier I did almost no writing practice beyond the first 5 months. If you take a chinese class you might be fine, as many Chinese classes require a lot of handwriting. I often can recognize characters but not recall their radicals/writing steps off the top of my head without reference (like 毁 强 岸 墙 愿 etc I am used to recognizing/typing words but not writing... writing I can only recall stuff like 我是，你知道，爸爸，妈妈，姐姐，哥哥，妹妹，弟弟，很好，不好， 没有 etc without a visual to remind me). While the new HSK at max seems to only need handwriting familiarity with like 900 hanzi (not that much), I would definitely need to purposely drill. :c honestly it's a fair expectation, for a language proficiency test (all the changes are), it's just something I'm severely lacking in lol.

Then the translating skill... I find translating to be a skill of its own, so one I'd definitely have to practice and improve in. To comprehend and chat is one ability, to listen to that chat and instantly translate AS you continue the chat in chinese/other language is a whole other skill.

[anadorablekiwi]

*puts on hoodie and turns on desk fan*

Hm? Yeah Im fine why do you ask?

[solarpunkani]

I hate needing backup jobs for my backup jobs

Like. Animation industry is kinda a bust rn. Local library and USPS branch aren’t hiring (unless I learn how to fix up cars and trucks REAL quick). Freelance writing implies I have articles out already, which I don’t. Anything I can find so far thats mildly naturey either pays 13 bucks an hour, involves chainsaws and bears, or both.

Like. What the fuck else do I do? Rot? *Retail?*

100 more reasons why capitalism sucks. How the hell am I supposed to get years of experience if no one’ll hire me and a MASTERS degree isn’t worth shit? How am I supposed to improve my portfolio if 75% of the jobs I apply to won’t even answer back? Why do I HAVE to have a job in order to even survive, let alone get my own place with a nice garden? And why is going back to school a near-impossible option because ~debt~ and ~loans~?

Why can’t we just have nice things

[kaiserkisser]

today is such a stark contrast to yesterday in how much i fucking hate today (vent/rant in tags bc i forgor to do it on my vent one)

[p4nishers]

remember obi wan kenobi?? man was he gay

[ryderdire]

One of These days I will claw my way out of my depression hole, but let me rest on the way up please.

[crabs-nonsense]

Accidentally gave myself exposure therapy! Results? Police report.

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

There's this dating show (on Netflix?) called Love Is Blind, where the entire premise is based around the question: can you fall in love with someone without ever seeing them?

And I hate that premise because the premise has to ignore the existence of blind people to work. Because you can fall in love with someone without ever seeing them because blind people fall in love every day and there are thousands upon thousands of blind people in loving relationships.

Hence, the existence of and experiences of blind people undermine the premise of the show. So the gimmick of the show doesn't work if you acknowledge that blind people exist.

So the show is, for lack of a better word, blind to the existence of blind people. And the show works because most of the viewers are also blind to it. The show doesn't even have to go out of its way to obfuscate it or distract from it; the word blind is in the title of the show.

And I find this incredibly frustrating because it's yet another example of how invisible the lives of disabled people are to the wider population.

It turns out, however, that when you voice any of this, a lot of people get upset and feel the need to explain to you that you're wrong, presumably because they liked the show and don't like that you're criticising it.

These explanations are incredibly ironic because they literally demonstrate your point, and also, they're all basically the same explanation. Said explanation being that the show isn't about blindness and/or the show isn't for blind people.

Like yeah no shit, the show isn't trying to evoke blindness with the title; if they did that, the premise of their show would fall apart like a clown car transformer.

Oh, "blind people will never see their partner/s" so the show isn't for them? Thanks, buddy, for exemplifying my point with your counterpoint. You clearly don't know anything about blindness or blind people since you don't even know that most blind people can see a little bit, and you could have easily learned that if disabled experiences weren't so damn invisible and ignored by abled people.

And as funny as it is to watch abled people tie themselves up in knots trying to defend a dating show, it is also infuriating because you can't even say "hey, I think it's kinda shitty that the premise of this dating show ignores the fact that blind people exist" without abled people coming out of the woodwork to explain how it's okay, actually, because it's not for blind people.

It's not okay, actually, because the entire point of the show is to ask "can you fall in love with someone without seeing their face?", as if blind people don't already do that every fucking day.

You can still like the show; you can still watch it; the disabled police aren't here trying to commandeer your reality TV show. It would just be good if you'd listen to disabled people, pay attention to our struggles and fights, and include us in your damn activism.

[sp1resong]

m. never really realized just how aro i am before

[tarpitbell]

11:23

I'm a damn leech. That's all I am

[princelydelinquents]

I need to stop telling myself every one is ignoring me -_-' sigh oh well anyway art time of my favorite silly! (i hate this bastard )/aff

I gotta draw him as a human istg he'd have an accent like rio's from across the spiderverse probably anyways recommend silly clothes please ! And I have a shit ton of blogs collecting dust if you'd like to check em out ! My favorite most notably is @cuttlefish-cabin ask about lore or something idk a tartar isntemperaroily up for grabs send an ask in ask anything dont be creepy ho thats his job!

Reblogs appreciated !

[aroacesigma]

.

[feralbeeast]

Sorry if I don't respond today/tomorrow. Yesterday has me feeling like absolute trash and a lot of people made it worse.

Anyways it's 4 am I should probably sleep

[rottingcompost]

the fact that at this point i dont even feel depressed or scared or anxious whenever i get reminded of my abuser and i instead get angry and start thinking and sometimes even saying the most venomous shit about her and wishing death on her. shes not really in my life much at all anymore but it still pisses me off and i still have to see her occassionally and at this point i feel like next time she tries to come to my apartment i wont even let her in and tell her to play in traffic or something.

[ascel-vibes]

aUGh- being dealt 10000 damage from a gen|der|bent poll i voted on....... *despair emote holding head in hands*