#hope to write for him more HOPE TO ALSO WRITE FOR RENO

[hoshiina]

pairing: hoshina soushirou x gn!reader (no prns)

summary: two secret admirers except he is actually insanely down bad for you its crazy

warnings: mentions the readers face 'flushing', it's kind of from hoshinas pov it's mostly his thoughts and voices, I cannot tell if hoshinas ooc but he's rather quiet with a whole ton of thoughts so idk if that's not it for you pls beware

Unlike one would expect, he was rather one to just sit back and admire. This is not to say he'd let a random guy just snatch you away, but he often couldn't do much more than just admire. It even surprised himself whenever he caught himself watching from afar again, but it really did make sense. He was one of hard work that no one would see, for as long as he could remember. Attention was not something he was used to, nor was it something he craved intensely. So what you had going on was fine for him, he was the happiest he's been just working with you every day.

However, sometimes at night, he'd wonder what it would be like if the one he loved, loved him back. What if he could make you smile and get you flustered? He wanted to know, but he convinced himself he didn't need to, nor could he.

Yet, one day those humble thoughts did a complete 180. He couldn't help it anymore, you had to be his.

It was no special day, at least not until you came along at least. It wasn't that big of a deal— it really wasn't, but the way your face flushed when his hand accidentally grazed your cheek would never be forgotten.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," he had said, immediately. He spun you around and touched the place he grazed, asking if you were okay.

"I'm, I'm perfectly fine, thank you," you said avoiding eye contact. You didn't mean to be rude but you knew your face was bright red and you couldn't dare see his expression.

But you should've. You absolutely should've. His heart clenched at the sight and his eyes widened, he was undeniably in love with you, anyone could tell. He didn’t know if he had any effect on you, or if you were just not used to people touching your cheek, but he couldn’t care less at the moment. He would be damned to let anyone see that look on your face, let alone cause it, so there was no choice but to make you his. He wanted you so badly, but he just didn't know how.

Now all through the day, he found himself thinking about you— he didn't think it could possibly get worse. He noticed everything you did more than ever. He noticed how your horrible sleep schedule was finally a little better, he noticed how you noticed everyone's new achievements and always remembered to compliment them, he noticed how you'd still sneak out in the middle of the night to train when you just couldn't fall asleep. He knew all these things, and yet he didn't know what to do.

A few weeks had passed and he was training late into the night again, but his thoughts were filled with you. It was getting late and he was finally going to call it a night, and that was when he finally noticed you by the door. When your eyes first met, he truly thought he was hallucinating— thought that the fatigue and the constant thought of you had made him go insane. Until you spoke, that was.

“I apologize,” you said in a hurry, your eyes shooting around until they slowly met his again. “I didn’t mean to stare.”

‘Didn’t mean to stare’? ‘Stare’? How long had you been there for? You were waiting for him to say something, but that was not even on his mind at the moment. As smart as he was, there were constantly thoughts flooding his head and all he had were questions. Why were you here? Why did you stay? Why were you still up? Were you having a hard time sleeping? Did he wake you up? Was he making a lot of noise? No, your room should be far enough away from the training room. Then why were you all the way here? Did you want to train too? Was he in the way? Were you—

“I’ll um, leave you to your training,” you said quickly, snapping him out of his flood of thoughts. “Sorry to bother you.”

You were turning away to leave when he reached out for your wrist. His mind was still blank but naturally the question he wanted answers to the most slipped right out of his mouth.

“Why…” he asked softly, eyes wide with surprise. “Why… were you here?”

You were just as surprised and you also didn’t know how to respond. “I couldn’t sleep, unfortunately,” you said slowly. It wasn’t a lie, you really were struggling to sleep— however you did turn the corner in the hall to see if the lights in the training room were on, and you did hope he was the one still up late. Yet, to your surprise his expression relaxed and he almost looked disappointed as he carefully released the grip on your wrist.

“But you need to get some rest as well,” you said, wanting to say something, anything, to keep you in this moment.

“You’re absolutely right,” he said. He was getting no rest tonight, he knew he was going to be up late just thinking about you or thinking about how he’s mildly heartbroken. He was tired of being stuck in his thoughts though and, maybe from the fatigue, it slipped out of him. “I wish you were here to see me.”

He only realized what he had said after he heard himself say it. Immediately the thoughts were back. Oh but it was quiet… perhaps you hadn’t heard it? Not a chance. What does he say next? Does he play it off? That would be such a scummy move. Oh, why would he do that? He had gotten so far keeping his feelings to no one other than himself, keeping quiet, admiring from afar, why now?

“I was!” you said, immediately. “I was here to see you!”

What did you say?

“I was hoping you were the one still training. I was hoping I’d see you tonight,” you said clearly.

He was about to embrace you when he caught himself right before he threw his arms around you. His hands were placed on your shoulders and his face was so close to yours. “Sorry, I’m literally drenched in sweat,” he said. “That would’ve been disgusting.”

“I don’t mind, I can always shower again,” you said, more eager for the hug than anything else.

“No, you need to sleep, it’s late,” he said, but he had to admit that pulled at his heart.

“Okay, then this will have to suffice,” you said and kissed him quickly.

He couldn’t believe his eyes. Not to be dramatic, but this was the moment he had been dreaming of for so long now.

His head was hanging, avoiding any eye contact— he didn’t want you to see his face flushed.

“I am so insanely in love with you.”

[ryescapades]

genre/warning: hoshina soshiro x gn platoon leader dazai!reader (can be both platonic or romantic), fluff

a/n: had a sudden burst of idea so here ya go :) can also be in the same universe as narumi’s version if you want it to be. up to yall!

narumi | extra

"oh, you're in charge this time too?"

tucking a pistol into the holster on your hips, you turn around at the sound of hoshina's voice, a teasing smile on your face. "you don't sound happy about that at all, vice-captain." you snicker.

your superior rolls his eyes lightheartedly. "last time you were assigned to this, one of the newbies almost blew up her drone," he points out, making you shrug. "not my fault they believed what i said about the kaiju hacking and taking control of our drones,"

"you shouldn't be giving out false information in the first place, platoon leader," he chides, and you give him a mock salute. “aye aye, sir. i promise i will only give away accurate information from now on,”

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

the grating sound of the massive gates sliding open fills the atmosphere, the new group of recruits waiting on standby as the kaiju beyond the gates prowl around.

"alright, the monthly evaluation will proceed as usual. neutralize kaiju, assist in whatever way ya can and we'll see how much your combat power has risen up since last time." hoshina says, looking over the recruits as you and another platoon leader from your division stand beside him.

with the ten minutes given as preparation, your eyes glint in a way that has hoshina suspiciously eyeing you as you approach one of the officers.

"how's the prodigy doing?" you greet, causing ichikawa to startle before he turns to you with a quick salute, a faint blush blooming on his cheeks at the nickname. "platoon leader y/n! i'm doing fine. i'm hoping my power release will improve today, since i've been working well with these freezing rounds," he beams.

"that's right! and i'll be right there with ya, reno! my combat power will definitely increase as much as yours, if not more!" furuhashi suddenly appears, slinging an arm around ichikawa’s shoulders with a wide grin. you smile as you watch them interact, before an idea comes to your mind.

"you guys remember the small armory hidden somewhere in the field, right? you see, extra points will be given if you manage to find it and use any of the big guns during the evaluation," you muse, a hand cupping the side of your mouth to not let the others around you listening in.

seemingly engrossed with the ‘hints', the two boys nodded eagerly. "so more points if we use the super secret weapons, huh?" furuhashi cheers excitedly as ichikawa puts a hand under his chin, thinking hard. "but the field is so big though, can we really find it while fighting kaiju at the same time?"

"sure can! you'll know when you see it. just run around near the garage area and it might be there right in front of you guys," you add, sounding all the more convincing. funnily enough, they start discussing several plans on how to quickly find the armory. "yeah, that's right. write it down, write it down." you insist, pleased that they don't notice your mischievous tone as you start to walk away, leaving them to their own devices.

"you'll immediately get zero mark if ya even so much as touch any of the weapons. those are only for your superiors to use,"

furuhashi and ichikawa yelp in surprise before they finally realize what their vice-captain had said. "wait, what?!" the former exclaims. the two of them swivel their heads towards you, looking betrayed at the expression you threw at them from afar; a tongue sticking out, a wink and two peace signs with a faint giggle of "teehee," coming out of your mouth.

"currently, the weapons in the armory are not fully loaded and it's our job— not the recruits'— to make sure they're always ready to be used in case of an emergency. your platoon leader over there," hoshina retorts, nodding his head towards your direction. "they knew fully well yall newbies won't ever find the armory given how hidden it is. although if ya actually do manage to find it and use the guns, it's not like they're going to fail ya. they're in charge of the marking systems this time," he explains.

"then why did they even mention about the armory in the first place?" reno questions, confusion taking over his face. "well, y/n is also in charge of loadin’ up the armory, unfortunately. you guys probably seemed like the perfect victims for them to use in bringin’ those weapons back to base for said maintenance," hoshina further clarifies, shaking his head exasperatedly at the thought of you slacking off at work.

well, technically you did convey the correct info… but still.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

you’re taken out of your reverie when there’s a light bonk on your head.

“stop loafin’ around on the job, y/n,”

rubbing on the spot hoshina had hit, you frown a little. “i’m not loafing around. it’s called taking a rest, vice-captain. something you’d hardly understand,” you mutter, tossing over on the couch in captain ashiro’s office.

the swordsman sighs almost fondly before placing a stack of papers in front of ashiro who has been working hard as ever. “reports for this month’s evaluation.”

“thanks, hoshina.”

“anytime, captain,”

ashiro glances at you from her seat behind the desk. “speaking of reports, i remember you saying you’re working on a new kaiju case, y/n?” she inquires with a perfectly raised brow, spinning the pen in her fingers mindlessly.

at that, your eyes dart over to the coffee table in front of you where a few papers were laid out, paragraphs of dark ink fully covering the surfaces. you’re about to grumble something again when a new voice catches your attention.

“this is all we’ve managed to find about the recent cases, captain ashiro.”

your head perks up, already sitting up as you turn towards the person just behind the couch you’re laying on. “ichikawa-kun! you’re a godsent, you know that? do you wanna write these reports for me?” you implore, eyes shining so brightly that there could’ve been sparkles floating around you with how extremely hopeful you look.

the mentioned officer blinks in surprise, not expecting you to suddenly make such a request. “e-excuse me?” he stammers awkwardly.

“stop makin’ the recruits do your work. it’s unethical. now scoot over,” you pout at hoshina’s scolding tone before doing what he instructed, making space for him to sit on the couch as well.

he pats his (sturdy and thick) thighs, and you happily plants your head on his lap as he reaches over to take your case papers, marvelling at how detailed and thorough your notes are. not a second after, the two of you immediately dive in to discuss about the facts and theories your brilliant mind had thought of.

ichikawa stares at your and hoshina’s interaction with a bewildered expression, sending a questioning look to his captain, which she only shrugs at.

“let them be. they’re in their own world right now,” she says with a small smile.

kind of gave up thinking how to end this so i just let it be at that lol

©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !

[biolumien]

Hello :)

It says your requests are open, and I wanted to know if maybe you could possibly write something for Reno from Kaiju#8. Maybe something really sweet and fluffy?? If not, that's totally fine, I just really like your writing style and would love some more of him 😊

notes: as per usual my writing took on a life of its own... i hope its still what you were looking for!

target practice

reno ichikawa x gn!reader description of just general gun anxiety. word count: 1018

you were never big on the competitive streak that all the other recruits seemed to have when it came to standard practice training. you watched on as iharu and reno fussed over their times down to the millisecond, alongside kaguragi and haruichi, before kikoru would obliterate all of their times anyway. there was also kafka, who was still struggling to maintain a sub-five-minute time on the training course, but he seemed good-natured about it all, despite his 1% compatibility rate with his suit.

to tell the truth, you were quite honestly terrified of wielding guns in general. you had decent compatibility with guns and decent compatibility with blades, too–nothing incredible, but not so bad that you’d fall behind. it’s just that your accuracy was completely off no matter what. firing blank was fine–anyone could do that. you were often even praised for how steady your hand was–but as soon as the ammo was loaded into the gun, it was like your mind would go blank, and you were reduced to a quivering, shaking mess unable to line up your reticle with the target, not to mention how badly you reacted to the recoil.

if kafka stayed at a steady five to six minute clear time for his training, you were at a solid seven to eight minutes–up to ten, depending on how badly you couldn’t recover from raising your gun. 

you look down at the rifle splayed across your lap.

you wanted to become stronger. reno, iharu, and the rest of them only kept getting stronger. you didn’t want to be left behind in the dust.

“you’re up,” hoshina says to you from his lofty perch above you all. “whenever you’re ready.”

you stand up, aware of everyone’s eyes on you. you swallow, your hands shaking as you raise your rifle to shoulder level. your heart pounds in your throat, and your fingers fumble as you load an ammo catrtridge into the gun, pulling the safety. you grit your teeth, trying to get the shaking to stop, but you almost drop the gun in the process, and you fly back, your limbs feeling weak.

“your vitals are showing an elevated heart rate,” hoshina says. “you can sit out of this today if you don’t want to–”

“no,” you protest. “i have to. i have to do this!”

“not if you pass out,” hoshina says, his voice sympathetic. “i get it, you know–i–”

“no, this is just–this is something wrong with me!” you protest. “i just–i keep–” you lower your gun, hating the way you already feel more relieved now that the gun has been lowered. “i can’t… i need to do this. i–” you raise a hand to your eyes, squeezing tightly. why couldn’t you just pull the fucking trigger?

“here. like this.”

you startle as reno walks up to you. behind him, iharu’s eyes are wide as haruichi and kaguragi are still arguing over something. kafka’s eyes are curiously staring at reno, too, but reno seems confident enough as he strolls over.

“i can help,” reno says. “if you’ll let me.”

“i… sure,” you say. 

reno’s hand crosses the distance and presses against yours, guiding your grip over the gun. your heart pounds in your chest again, but for a much different reason other than terror this time. reno was–just really warm. 

“don’t pull,” reno says softly, his violet eyes meeting yours. “squeeze. press the gun close to your chest, tight, like this.” he shifts his other hand, letting the gun press firmly into your elbow. your face flushes a bit as he maneuvers your body with deft hands. “it’ll help with the recoil. i notice you never brace yourself like this. so it’ll help. you’ve seen the training course many times already. don’t move your arms so much, that’s how you’ll tire yourself out. lead with your shoulder.”

as you raise the gun this time, you swallow, finding that your heart is already beginning to pound less.

“thank you, reno,” you say, smiling at him. 

reno’s face goes pink, and he raises his hand to his mouth, a short laugh leaving his lips.

“i… you don’t need to–” “alright, lovebirds, pack that up,” hoshina calls. “if you’re ready to start, then head to the start of the course.” 

reno stumbles backwards a bit out of surprise, and you stare up at where hoshina’s looking down at you all. his gaze is unreadable as usual, a small smile on his lips.

this time, your score is closer to kafka’s. you still startle when you pull the trigger, but this time you’re able to calm down, line up your sight with the targets, and hit them with decent accuracy. you think feel reno’s subtle grip against your hands, guiding your gun–but that was just a fleeting, silly thought.

“you did it!” reno says, standing up as you make your way back. “i knew you could do it.” he seemed to want to step forward in a move to hug you, or something–anything, but instead his hands dangled awkwardly in mid-air for a moment. 

“thanks to you,” you say sheepishly, feeling your face heat up again. you step forward, wrapping your arms around him in a hug, slotting yourself neatly against his body. “really. thank you so much, reno.”

reno stammers for a second, his hands shifting to settle around your waist.

“you don’t need to–thank me,” reno says. “i… you’re amazing.”

that seemed to bear a little more sincerity than any of his other words, and you laugh, feeling warm. 

“thanks,” you say. reno seemed to hold you a little tighter after that, bringing you closer.

“hey, you two.”

you immediately fly back from reno as iharu spoke up.

“the two of you are fucking gross!” he shouts.

reno sputters.

“hey–fuck you, actually!” reno exclaims. “we were having a moment!”

“what the fuck did you just say to me?” iharu shouts. “have your moment somewhere else! don’t just do it out here! you’re so fucking cringe–!”

“oh, like you’re one to talk–”

you watch fondly on as reno and iharu start arguing, a curling warmth in your chest.

[nightfal1n]

Thinking about Kafka and Mina: Where she's at

Maybe Kafka is now walking the path Mina has been through in past years,...

Manga spoilers up to the very recent chapters below including some panels as I rambling while figuring out how to write

not much romantic just in case that's what you're looking for (more like bromantic? i can't do much rereading...)

*reply, tagging that includes mina hate (or any form of hate in general) get instant block. i've seen too many on internet already*

having unknown power thusted on to them and feeling increasing responsibilities being placed on their shoulders

You're the only one who can put stop to all this, but you can't save all of them, in fact, many has died already...you need to act to obtain the best outcome, even that mean letting people dies in front of you

For Kafka he got Reno pulled up to handle the threat. but Mina...

...and she's been in this until she learned to step out and get a comrade who she can trust, all by herself. And tbh if Mina has more pettiness in her she can feels more resentment toward Kafka who decided to catch up to her after she finally convincing herself that she doesn't need him anymore

She does call him liar but she never let that out, and ever since Kafka joined the defense force, she never brought that up again

Then why she put a distance between her and Kafka? Aside from their difference in ranks, there's the fact that she remember what kind of person he is

If she let out that she wants him by her side, simply having him makes her feels invincible. Of course Kafka will rush to her side in heart beat, instead of admiring her from far away thinking wow Mina has made it big. If she decides to tell him how her power doesn't really feels like hers and she simply put a lot of effort to utilize it so people can rest assured, he will realizes that she is still the same Mina underneath the JAKDF idol everyone looks up to.Then why she refuse to show that? Why she maintain their distance, sticks to the military rule whenever she has to deal with him in front of people.

Because people who suported her...a good portion of them, ended up like this:

She knows even with her power that no one can explains that scared even Mina herself, Kaiju threats are bigger than she can carry alone. She's very objective about choosing Hoshina to be her next-in-command (There's some similarity between Hoshina and Kafka that might influence her decision but thats my headcanon for now). She still want Kafka, his presence alone can pull her out from the depth of despair she's in, but she learned hard way how great it cost to simply stay with her. Her childish self feels betrayed by his absent, calling him liar just to be strong enough to pull the trigger as people around her are dying, begging her to end the threat even a second faster so no more people dies.

Of couse she also respect Kafka's decision to chase after his dream. So she can only hope that when Kafka reached where she is, with helps of all people around him, he will still be the same Kafka she knows

[reidscanehand]

you’re the northern star

Inspired by this song by Dom Fera Pairing: Rockstar!Remus Lupin x fem!Reader (Modern AU) Category: Hurt/Comfort/Fluff TW: implied alcohol/drug use (really just overdoing it on Remus’ part)

Well, this is different, innit? I was rewatching the Taylor Swift Miss Americana documentary and I got an idea about a rockstar not sure of what to do with himself. Also, this is a really fucking stunning song that I’ve loved and wanted to use for a while. The other lyrics Y/N sings are another Dom Fera song called “Midnights in October”. 

Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he’d been And he held onto someone, and he sung out compelled “You’re why I was right to trust myself”

~~~

Being a rockstar was everything Remus ever dreamed of. The Marauders had kicked off when the boys had all finished school together. Peter had quickly left before they really took off  - unsurprising, really, but no less saddening - quickly replaced, though, by Frank Longbottom, who was, in fact, a better player anyway. With Frank on keyboards, Remus on bass, James on drums, and Sirius on guitar and vocals, the band really began to gel for the first time. Remus and Sirius wrote all the music and lyrics - mostly Remus, really. He could play piano, guitar, and bass, making it easier for him to arrange everything, but Sirius did his fair share. The addition of Frank seemed to symbolize a new beginning for everything, really. 

That and James and Lily finally getting together. If James wasn’t so head over heels for the girl, Remus could’ve sworn he’d asked her out just for her connections. 

With Lily installed as their manager, The Marauders started to play bigger venues, their songs started getting more streams, and, suddenly, they were releasing EPs, then an album released to stunning reviews and an enthusiastic and ever growing fan base. They were invited on Graham Norton, then played a UK tour, then a US tour, performing on Jimmy Fallon, and Saturday Night Live. Then the Grammys came - Album of the Year, Record of the Year, Best New Artist, and Best Rock Album, all in one fell swoop. 

And Remus suddenly realized that that was all he’d ever wanted. All he’d ever wanted...and now that he had it, what was he to do? He didn’t really know. He suddenly felt embarrassed and uncomfortable. He couldn’t write, he couldn’t sleep, he couldn’t do much of anything. He played with the group, but even Sirius got on him for how bummed out he sounded while singing backing vocals. He didn’t feel like he could talk to his bandmates. He started drinking...aggressively, really. When he couldn’t sleep, he would drink to knock himself out, sometimes popping pills to help in the endeavor. Then he’d take pills to wake up, take pills to energize himself to do a show. He knew it was bad, but he felt just numb. 

It was an unspoken problem with his bandmates. They knew something was wrong, especially Sirius, who was so furious with him after their last writing session - a session to which Remus arrived late and hungover - that he didn’t speak to him for almost a week unless he absolutely had to. This last leg of the US tour couldn’t be over quick enough in Remus’ opinion. Tensions were high and maybe...maybe he just needed a break? He wasn’t sure. Their Reno, Nevada shows had been sold out and with the weekend over, they’d leave the next morning for Los Angeles. Dropping his stuff at the bus and then going to his hotel room to pick up his wallet, he left the hotel without telling anyone, doubting they’d miss him. James and Lily were...canoodling in their room, Frank was facetiming back home with his girlfriend, Alice, and Sirius was seducing whatever groupie he’d brought back that evening. Remus had tried the groupie route, hoping that feeling something would bring him back to earth, but it just made him feel even more numb, really. 

So, he took off. Their hotel was near enough to a bar that he walked over pretty quickly. It was some local place, he didn’t pay the name too much mind, settling at the bar and hoping no one recognized him. It was pretty dark, anyway. There was a little group playing popular music covers on a small stage in one corner, but it wasn’t too busy. Remus asked for a rum and coke, heavy on the rum. The bartender seemed to get the message and Remus quickly chugged back a couple of drinks, asking for a third when the band caught his attention.

“This is a less popular song,” a young woman says while pulling a stool up to the mic, “but it’s one of my favorites. I hope you like it.” The opening chords of the song caught his attention. He watched, transfixed, as the young woman began to sing.

“Oh, oh, oh, oh. There’s a story I tell, really just to myself. Like a prayer I sing to empty shores, so how’s it sound just like yours? How’s it sound just like yours?” she sang wistfully, her pretty voice lilting around the lyrics. 

Remus hoped he wasn’t drunkenly imagining things...because he’d written this song. It was one of the first songs released by The Marauders back before...before anything, really. Before they’d turned to rock, even. It was one of the songs he’d recorded with Sirius when it was just the two of them. He’d recorded all the parts in his closet at university, sitting cross-legged on the floor to fit in there with his various instruments, and mixing the parts on his computer instead of writing a paper for his intro to philosophy course. 

“There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you and only you. So, how did I hear it too? How did I hear it too?” She continues to play on ukelele as the rest of the band comes in on piano, bass, and drum, but Remus remains focused on the young woman. Her eyes are closed, but she’s smiling to herself as she sings. She looks so...peaceful. He can’t believe it’s his song that’s made her so...so happy, so wistful. The fans loved the music, sure, but Remus hadn’t seen someone love someting he’d created like this before. He sips his drink slowly, methodically. He doesn’t want to get drunk for the first time in ages. He wants to speak to this beautiful girl. He wants to tell her...he doesn’t know, but he needs to be more put together to talk to her. 

“And if we try to say what we need we could be okay. We clearly believe in believing, baby, we’ll try slow, we’ll try slow. There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you, only you and now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too.” She finishes the song and there’s a small round of applause, led mostly by Remus. The guitarist steps up to the mic and thanks everyone, announcing the end of the set for the band. The group gets offstage and Remus tries not to seem creepy as the young woman crosses to bar, leaning over it and ordering a Jameson on the rocks. 

“I’ll get it,” he hears himself say. She turns to see him and her eyes widen. 

“Oh my God, you’re...you’re Remus Lupin,” she almost whispers.

“Yeah,” he shrugs unsure of what to say. He’s still not used to the fans. Thankfully, she doesn’t seem the type to freak out. In fact she looks almost embarrassed.

“I promise I had no idea you were here,” she says quietly, “I would never have played that if I’d known-”

“I loved it,” he cuts her off. “You have a beautiful voice.”

“Um,” she looks surprised, “thank you. I really...um, I’m not really a singer or-”

“Could’ve fooled me,” he teases. The bartender hands her her drinks and she seems to remember where they are. 

“What’s your name?” he asks. 

“Y/N,” she answers shyly. She looks down at her drink and opens her mouth, quickly closing it again, unsure of what to say. Remus feels the most sober he’s felt in ages. There’s something about this girl that’s warming him. He can feel his heart beating and it’s the most he’s felt in ages. 

“Well, Y/N,” he smiles, scooting over and sitting next to her. “Tell me more about yourself.”

“I...what?” Y/N looks at him quizzically. “Don’t you have a show or...groupies to...or something?”

“I don’t have anything to do,” he teases, “except talk to the pretty lady that sang one of my oldest and most favorite songs in a random bar in Reno. So how’s about you tell me everything about yourself, hm?”

She looks at him, head tilting slightly, “Can I get you a drink?”

“A water,” he answers quietly. Her eyes glance for the briefest second at the three empty glasses next to him, but she doesn’t ask any questions. She orders him a water and scoots closer. 

“So, my name is Y/N Y/L/N.”

~~~

He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are ‘Cause I followed this far Like I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star

~~~

“I need a ticket for tomorrow’s show, please,” Remus asks suddenly, not quite expecting the silence that follows. He looks up and sees everyone on the bus staring at him. “What?”

“For tomorrow?” Lily questions, clearly trying not to sound surprised.

“Yes, please,” Remus replies. 

“Who the hell do you know in LA?” Sirius asks far more aggressively than Lily.

“She’s not from LA,” Remus answers. “But she couldn’t get a ticket to the Reno shows, so I invited her to the LA one.”

“So there’s a she?” James teases, wiggling his eyebrows. Lily elbows him gently and then pulls her iPad over to her from the box it rests in on the bus. She opens it and clicks a few things. 

“VIP, I’d imagine?” she asks without looking at him.

“If you can, that’d be cool,” Remus tries to sound nonchalant. Lily nods and continues typing. 

“And what’s the name of this she?” Frank heckles, glancing at Sirius and James.

“None of your business,” Remus replies, trying to hide his smile.

“I will actually need her name,” Lily corrects.

“You can’t just put it under my name?” Remus almost whines.

“Not if you want her in the VIP area,” Lily looks at him mock accusingly. “And from the sounds of things, I assume you do.”

“Y/N,” he tells her, sighing exasperatedly. “Y/N Y/L/N.” He looks back down at his notebook, scrawling down a few ideas he’d had in his head since last night. He and Y/N had talked until the bar closed, then sat outside talking about everything and nothing until he’d had to leave for the bus. The couch shifts as Sirius plops down next to him.

“You writing?” he asks, trying to sound nonchalant.

“Maybe,” Remus shrugs, not looking at him. He can feel Sirius staring at him, but sees him nod out of the corner of his eye.

“You hungover?” Sirius asks quietly. 

“No,” Remus clears his throat, finally looking up at his friend. “I’m, um...thinking of taking a break from drinking for a bit, actually.”

“Cool,” Sirius nods, a small smile playing on his lips. “Pills, too?” Remus nods and Sirius practically beams, clapping him on the shoulder and nodding. He stands, heading back to his bunk before turning around, now facing everyone, a shit-eating grin on his face, “So, will you be dedicating every song to Y/N, or...”

Remus throws a pillow at him and pretends to be annoyed, but can’t ignore the genuine joy edging its way back into his numbed heart.

~~~

Three hours in to a three minute call Some gambler wondered if she’d just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, “I’ve seen the bright side my whole lovely life”

~~~

“How’s the writing going?” she asks, taking a sip of water from her Stanley cup that’s just off camera. Remus leans back against his headboard and groans in response. He’s thrilled when she giggles and he looks back at the screen to catch her smile. 

“It can’t be that bad,” Y/N teases.

“It’s not, actually,” Remus replies. “Album’s due to the label in about two months and we’ve finalized all but two songs in terms of lyrics. So that’s two left to record? Not too shabby since it took us so long to write the damn thing.”

“That’s amazing. More songs about...oh, what’s that new one I loved? Um...the one about Aperol?”

“’Spritz’ was more Sirius’ baby than mine, I’ll have you know,” Remus explains, “but I’ll tell him you like it, he’ll rub that in my face for ages.”

“Maybe he’ll hate me less for distracting his bassist,” she quips. 

“No one hates you, darling,” Remus assures her. “If anything they’re just happy I’m smiling again.” It’s getting dark outside his window and he leans over to turn his lamp on. 

“I’m sorry,” Y/N says suddenly. “I shouldn’t be keeping you up. I know the time difference is-”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he cuts her off, sitting up straighter, “I wouldn’t answer if I didn’t want to talk, love.”

“I know, but we were just going to say goodnight and then-”

“We both know,” he tilts his head teasingly, staring at her through the webcam, “that we weren’t going to just say goodnight.” 

Y/N rolls her eyes but smiles, “There are better ways of telling me I talk too much.”

“I’d love it if you could talk to me all day long,” Remus assures her. “And you know that.”

“I’d like that, too,” Y/N whispers, smiling gently at him through the webcam. 

“Really?” Remus asks, sitting up slightly. 

“Yeah, there’s all this stuff that I want to tell you throughout the day...and I’d text you, but then I feel dumb for texting you-”

“You can text me whenever, you know that,” he reminds her. She giggles and his heart soars. 

“I’ll keep that in mind when you finally get annoyed of me sending you pictures of my morning smoothies,” she teases. 

“Smoothie time? Babe, I’d be heartbroken if I missed it!” She laughs and he uses the warm feeling in his chest to talk about what he’s wanted to for a few weeks now. “But...but what if...what if you were able to talk to me all day?”

She freezes, eyes growing wide, “What do you mean?”

“I know that we...I know we haven’t been together all that long,” he begins. “But, I would...I’d really like it if you’d be my girlfriend. And I’d...I’d love it if you’d come here and just be with me. You can still pursue your music here...I know that you’re...”

“I’d do it,” Y/N replies quietly. 

Remus’ heart does that thing that it’s done since the moment he saw her. It feels like it’s expanding in his chest. 

“Really?” 

“How soon do you want me there, lover boy?”

~~~

Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain’t casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They’re just looking at dresses and rings that she likes

~~~

It’s warm in the Ed Sullivan Theatre, but Stephen Colbert is easily the nicest host Remus has ever had the pleasure to meet. Despite the fact that he agreed to letting them present the new song instead of playing the lead single, Remus is still nervous. 

“Three more weeks, dude,” Sirius whispers to him. 

“Yeah, I know. How’s James holding up? Ready to get married?” Remus jokes, leaning back so James can hear him, whispering even though they’re on a commercial break. 

James isn’t annoyed, though, he grins hugely, “Never been more ready, boys.”

“No, not that, I mean, yeah, but, you and your girl,” Sirius corrects. “One year, right?”

Remus beams himself, “Yeah, just about three weeks. Our anniversary’s, like, two days after the wedding.”

“You, um...you thinking about it?” Sirius hedges, passing side glances with Frank and James. 

“About what?” Remus asks with faux innocence. 

“Come off it,” Frank groans, rolling his eyes. He and Alice got married during their last break, just before the release of this new album, timing it perfectly before the madness kicked back up again. 

“You guys gonna be copying everything from me and Lily’s wedding?” James teases. The boys laugh, but Remus just smiles. He glances around and spots you talking to Lily, probably going over your set list. You’ll be opening for The Marauders in most cities during this next tour. You’re a bit more indie pop than The Marauders, but the boys genuinely wouldn’t have it any other way. And the fans will likely love how you close with one of Sirius’ and Remus’ oldest songs, bringing the boys onstage with a tune of their own. 

Seeing that you’re distracted, he turns back to his band, his oldest friends and whispers conspiratorially, “No...no, but, um...I mean, I’ve had the ring for about six months now.” 

All three men turn and face him, eyes widening, jaws dropping.

“Dude-”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”

“Six months?!?!?”

“Chill,” Remus whisper yells. “I’m gonna ask when we go to Paris after the tour’s over.” 

“That’s so romantic!” Frank whispers, turning away as a cameraman signals for them. James smiles and sends him a thumbs up.

Sirius stares at him for a moment longer and smiles. He mouthes, “Happy for you, dude” as Colbert introduces them.

“Back stateside for their new tour, the British rock band The Marauders is with us tonight. Originally they were going to perform the newest lead single from their new album, which Rolling Stone has called, ‘a near perfect sophomore album’, but their bassist, Mr. Remus Lupin, emailed about a week ago and asked if he could perform a bonus track. This is a bit different, isn’t it, Remus?”

Mr. Colbert looks to the band and a camera zeroes in on Remus, a kind PA holding a mic up to him. 

“Yeah, it’s not...not really a rock song, I guess,” he grins as the audience titters. 

“It’s called ‘Northern Star’,” Colbert says, smiling widely at him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Remus nods. 

“When we started writing, Sirius and I, we had a lot of songs that sounded like this. And it took someone very special,” Remus finds Y/N’s eyes and his smile deepens, “to remind me how wonderful it felt to write like this again.”

“Well, please take it away,” Colbert finishes. 

Remus nods and looks down at the piano, pulling the attached mic closer to his face as silence falls over the audience. He can feel Y/N staring at him, not expecting this at all. 

“Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he'd been And he held onto someone, and he sung out, compelled ‘You're why I was right to trust myself’

He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star

Three hours into a three-minute call Some gambler wondered if she'd just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, "I've seen the bright sides my whole lovely life"

She said Talk me up and talk me down Talk too long, I'll stick around Talk me into following you somewhere far Like I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure you're the Northern Star

La la la

Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain't casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They're just looking at dresses and rings that she likes

They said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star Oh, I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure And I'm sure that you're the Northern Star.”

Remus hits the last chords staring at Y/N, hearing his friends playing his beautiful song all around him, and knowing that he’s happier than he ever thought he could be. Rockstar be damned, this is what he’d always wanted. 

~~~

A/N: This is different, but I hope you liked it! 

Didn’t include my taglist because it’s been so long, plus this is a different fandom! Love you all xx 

[claudemblems]

Could you do a Reno X reader where the reader is like a law breaker

Sure, I can do that! A reminder that I've only played Final Fantasy VII Remake so that's all I have to go off of haha

Also to anyone reading, I'm not taking requests, but I decided to go ahead and write this one. Please be sure to read my pinned for further updates! Hope you enjoy 💖

Partners in Crime | Reno - Final Fantasy VII Remake

You break the law, and Reno enforces it. There's absolutely nothing strange about this picture, is there?

If it were anyone else, Reno would have had the culprit in handcuffs by now, resorting to some helpful "negotiation" tactics to extract information out of them.

Lucky for you, you're Reno's lover, and that also means you have the protection of the Turks. As long as you don't try to pull a fast one on Shinra, Reno can just pretend you don't have a warrant out for your arrest...

Is it a good look for Shinra to have a criminal involved with them? Maybe not, but they've participated in much worse, so just be glad you're not on their watchlist.

However, that doesn't mean Tseng won't keep a watchful eye on you. Many times he's urged Reno to reconsider who he "seduces", but it's a lost cause. Reno dates whoever he wants. If other people don't like it, that's their problem.

He also has to admit, he quite likes the thrill of the chase. Literally, in this sense. He's had to help you escape from crops and other criminals more times than he can count. But his aggravation eventually gives way to excitement. What are they gonna do, attempt to lock up one of the Turks? He'd like to see them try!

It's a familiar scene: you and Reno speeding away from a clearly angry gang on a motorcycle--one of theirs that you stole, of course. You'd been up in arms with their leader who had kept ruining potential money-making opportunities for you. So, to get revenge, you'd ripped his favorite hundred thousand dollar watch right off his hand, stealing his personalized bike for good measure.

"You're insane," Reno sneered, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist to keep himself steady. "When I agreed to go with you to 'settle some business,' I didn't think that meant making enemies with a well-known crime lord!"

"I just surprise you every day, huh?" you grinned, revving the bike for good measure. "That's why you cant get enough of me."

"Maybe I could stand to get a little less of you," he mumbled, but you felt his body shift closer to yours. "What you're doing is incredibly dangerous. I hope that realization hasn't escaped your head."

"But isn't your work dangerous, too? What's the difference?"

"I...I know what I'm doing. I can handle my work."

"Are you saying I can't handle things on my own?"

"No, that's not--! Look, would you listen to me the one time I'm trying to snap some sense into you? You could get killed out here. Shinra may have your back, but the rest of Midgar doesn't."

You went quiet for a moment, contemplating his words. If he wasn't in such a bad mood, you would have kept teasing him. But clearly he was worried--worried about you. And you knew better than to take Reno of the Turk's concern for granted.

"I'll be safe," you promised, turning your head to press a quick kiss to his cheek. "We still have lots of dates to go on, so I should probably make it out of here in one piece, right?"

"Hah, finally you're starting to sound reasonable." He pushed himself closer against your back, letting his breath hit your ear. "What would I do if my darling wasn't able to kiss me goodnight anymore?"

Your face flushed at his words, hands struggling to keep a steady grip on the handlebars. "Now is not the right time to flirt with me, darling."

"Hmph. Maybe it'll teach you a good lesson. If you'd listen to me more, you might get rewarded for it."

A yelp escaped Reno's throat as you did a quick wheelie with the bike, and you laughed knowing he must have glaring at the back of your head.

"Disobedience doesn't get rewarded."

"Maybe not, but perhaps I'd like the punishment better."

[cburambles]

Lil' analysis of the Rufus/ Elena scene crumbs in Rebirth

I'm doing this for fun but organize my thoughts and keep tracks of things I've noticed about them while also giving some food for thoughts if there's people interested in that ship.

Here's i'm gonna analyze the scenes.

I will later write about design & symbolism , their arcs, their personnalities, relationship & how they perceive each other ,what Rebirth add to the rest of the compilation as well what road can we can potentially expect for the story of Rufus & the Turks in part 3 in general.

The Mythril Mines scene:

Here, we get get a great way to establish her character. Elena is the one who is curious and asks questions while the others try to not think about their orders much. As someone new, she also has an unique POV as the mysteries unfold in front of her.

It's also a great way to show that her superiors don't tell her everything, which may cause problem in the future as Elena is a self-righteous & rather independant person who sometime disobey orders.

They also did a great job showcasing her ruthless side & also sublty hint what drives her.

The helicopter scene en-route for the Gold Saucer with Palmer:

Here, Elena is shown being not scared to use Rufus' authority to shut up a member of the Board. Despite the space program being shut down, we still have to remember that Elena is a new employee & that Palmer is her senior by decades & used to be a friend of Rufus' father. Despite the hierarchical difference, Elena's is pretty assertive for a new employee & doesn't hesitate to borrow Rufus' authority to have Palmer stop complaining & contesting Rufus' decision to send him there in a sassy manner.

The Gongaga proto-relic sidequest:

After you're done with one of the Gongaga VR mission in the Turks facility, Elena is shown without hesitation ushering Rufus & him acknowledging her. We see that she's not scared of him & both of seem to have a respectful & cordial relationship.

I noted the interesting composition of the shot tho.

First, they didn't have to animate this. They could just had have Rufus says his line about the player performance & then leave. But they still wanted to showcase that little moment between the two of them for some reason.

Second, the way the camera zoom-in on them while putting Rude on the foreground but almost push him out of the frame as he's watching them, as if the devs really want you to pay attention to that interaction.

Third, Elena is the rookie. Thus the one who should address Rufus directly should be her seniors. However, Rufus & Elena address each other directly, with the latter talking to him confidently.

This also happens right after we see Rufus complaining about Tseng wanting to assign him bodyguards & saying he didn't need any so you would expect he would be annoyed that the babiest Turk would try to usher him away or have him ignore her. We saw how he can get with Heidegger in Remake not calling him "Mr.President". But he doesn't.

Fourth, it's clear here there was a whole switcheroos between roles due to Reno's jpn VA passing away.

In this mission, Rude & Elena address you as if you were Reno (Rude call you partner & Elena reffer to you as "senpaï" .

Reno however, already has a lot of experiences after all this years working for the Turks. My guess is that originally, those VR missions were destined to Elena.

It makes more sense, to prepare her to what the Turks' life is. VR Rufus is also already president too. If you do well during that mission, Rufus is willing to offer you whatever you want. Would that mean he made such proposition to Elena at one point? (is this how she got her pink gun which has strangely a white belt on & black buttons & is studed with diamonds?)

The flight to the Gold Saucer with Rufus:

During that scene, we're shown that Elena is curious & independant, making her a great intelligence officer material. The second she learns about the Promised Land, she decide to study the subject in the hopes to understand it better & the significance for Shinra. She then admit that it was actually a good idea to let Aerith run around so they can follow her.

It immediately switch from her to Darkstar waking up & curiously looking at Rufus. People who played the game in english however may have missed out an interesting audio detail: In the japanese dub, you can understand the reason why Darkstar woke up as you can hear Rufus do his signature (satisfied) "hmph" and him chuckling to himself while looking at window. It's even more audible in the french version as well.

D waking up & looking at Rufus curiously make it feel like it's an unusual occurence. Maybe he's just thinking about something & laugh to himself but it's also likely the game is implying Rufus was silently listening to her.

It's interesting because he is rarely framed that way. Most of the time he's the center of the room & the conversation, leading it. He addresses his employees & doesn't give more info than what's necessary. Even with Tseng, he often has his back to him & only turn around when he needs to make a point or when something intrigue him.

Added to that, letting Aerith go to follow her was Rufus' plan. Elena basically indirectly complimented him, which could be the reason why he's chuckling to himself. We never got to see him reacting this way to someone until now. For comparison, Heidegger compliment him when he decide to fire Sister Ray during chapter 4 & he didn't get any reaction from Rufus. But he's seemingly happy to get Elena's approval?

The chapter 12 tussle & rumble with Elena, Rude & Rufus.

For a start, we have to talk about how stupid this plan is as the Turks & Rufus could have just stolen the keystone, either by using Rufus'authority or burglarize the place while Dio & Avalanche were looking away. Rufus didn't also have to be there. Shinra is on the brink of a war but he instead decide to go on a trip ( it probably took a least 1 or 2 days for them to go from Midgar & reach the GS) I may have my speculations on why he's acting this way tho.

Rude, Elena & Rufus have beef with Avalanche so we can assume they went with that plan to settle their grudge by beating the shit of each other. However, the plan at first seemed to be for only Rude & Elena to fight, not Rufus. During the battle, you can hear Rufus calling Dio. It's a scripted event that only happen when you stagger Rude or Elena during the second phase of the combat (and there's chances it is Elena due to her weaker constitution). Did Rufus get protective of the Turks, which is what pushed him to suddenly participate?

Then there's the scene where he appears in the arena. While the duel between Cloud & Rufus is the main event, it's interesting to note we just have a quick zoom out on Cloud's face to show his reaction while it lingers more on the Turks & in particular Elena. There's a quick scene where Tseng calm down an excited & likely worried for his master, D. Then it switch to Elena asking what he's doing. Rufus notice her as his head turns toward her.

Elena is the most on focus while Rude in the background is blurred.

And we get this kind of smile from Rufus who's still looking at her while waving to the public. He looks softer than usual.

Then his face immediately switch to this when he turns to Cloud.

He answering her by making a show of himself. And then it's switch again to an annoyed & worried Elena. Once again, she's the point of focus while Rude is blurred.

Rufus then tell them to go join Tseng. And here we can see that he's addressing Elena (when he should address Rude) directly as his eyes are turned toward her & then turns back to Cloud while Elena can't help herself but emit a defeated sigh.

Here we're seeing that she stays herself around Rufus, trying to contest his decisions & everything. Not scared of him & not scared to show her annoyance at her boss' dumbass behavior.

Added to that, Cloud is seen asking the two party members who fought with him until now to leave him for that 1 on 1 fight. One of these two party members always turns out to be one of his love interests.

Once again, we're shown he actually pays attention to Elena, thought Rebirth is actually not the only time this happens. That whole exchange remind me of that moment between Reno & Rude in TKAA:

Which could explain as well Rude's reaction to Cloud being like "oh, poor you!" when Rufus is revealed to be alive in Advent Children. The game weigh even more on the idea that Rufus is emotionnally immature and insecure. Like Evan.

And Rufus' attitude is pretty Evan like in the way he takes risks while Elena is often compared to Kyrie by the fandom. Elena & Kyrie are fierce, morally ambiguous women who cause trouble to their group but also can be shown to be level-headed at times. Kyrie also chide & tries to confront Evan about his reckless side. Both of them could almost be considered as darker versions of these two characters. If the brothers have similar tastes in term of potential partners, well…

I think it's also interesting to note that Rufus is far more pissed about losing than during the first duel in Remake, added with Cloud poking at his insecurities.

The departure to the temple of the ancients:

This is a really interesting scene as it's a great way to show the group dynamic & Elena's potential importance after the company's crumble post- Meteorfall. Here, Elena is shown openly critisizing Rufus' decision to send them & a nice chunk of the army to the Temple of the Ancients, knowing the risks.

Rude, Reno & Tseng are shown being fine going along with whatever orders Rufus give them while Elena has her doubts & interrogations and rightfully so. Sending so many people there is a reckless move & she ended up being proven right. ( I could go on a tangent on how Elena could be a great partner to him due to the way she questions things. There's a difference between loyalty & sycophanty. And from the first scene with the Board or even Sister ray, what he needs is loyal people with enough backbone to challenge & give him the right advices. Which is what Elena represents)

However this were my beef with the english localization is coming in & how people who rely on it may have missed some nuances to the whole exchange:

In the eng version, she goes on how Rufus accompagnying the expedition is a bad idea but on brand with his character.

However in the jpn & french localization when Rude tells her Rufus is coming with them, Elena ask what he means & Reno says it's expected of him/it's not surprising. Elena says it's dangerous but that also that she doesn't dislike Rufus' decision to come with them, which is peak tsundere attitude.

While I think her eng VA did a great job overall, the direction also constantly make her sounds aggressive, even during moments when she's not.

So yeah the first version is just a statement on Rufus' behavior.

The second version give nuance on how Elena perceive Rufus. Yes, it's dangerous for him to do that but it also help her settle down a bit. She likes the fact he is participating in this.

It's also a great way to show why he has so much sway with the Turks, as Reno, Rude & Elena enjoy some of thrills that come with the job and Rufus is the same.

The compilation always frustrated me with the way their relationship has interesting tidbits but was often glossed over. I was surprised with the way Rebirth depicted these two as I considered myself lucky if we actually got them together in the same frame but we instead got a few interactions & them reacting to each other in a way that is pretty informative about their own characters but also how their dynamic would work.

It's pretty close of the interpretation I had always had for Ruiri/Rulena/Rufena: the type of ship that belong in the power couple category, similar opposites who challenge each other in a way that support them due to their strong personnalities & position while navigating thru their professional & personnal life with a fun dynamic to boot.

[blackjack-15]

mmm no syd's never been here and she's drinking it in...not that there's much to drink in

this isn't like bachelor 'chic' this is depression: the apartment

but i love that the show is dedicated to shattering any illusions she might have had about Chef Carmen Berzatto but also building her up to knowing just Carmy -- his asshole moments, his good points, his traumas, his sense of humor, and his quirks

blue sharpie -- blue again -- but hey i hope it's a sharpie that works?

um. carmy. that hand on her lower back?? completely unnecessary, but i'm thrilled we've absolutely shattered the touch barrier...but it was completely unnecessary touching, she was already moving.

syd just absorbing the jeans being in the oven is hilarious. the bear is a comedy

"don't look them in the eyes" i love you ebra

that cut to carmy's chef whites as syd is talking? more foreshadowing i think -- does syd have a nice pair of chef whites? is carmy gonna give her one (which would be Ridiculous of him those are so expensive but ii can kinda see him doing it as a vote of confidence? he's not great with money we've seen that)?

"chaos menu but, um...thoughtful?" that's carmy in a nutshell XD

my gosh him staring at her. baby.

it's SUCH interesting body language -- syd is forward, focused, writing, and carmy's standing with one hand on the counter, posture open and angled towards her? watching her as he speaks? i think he's gonna find himself in deep by the time he realizes even a little of what he's feeling, and it's gonna be beautiful

syd smiling at the chef's whites, at his monogram. this is 100% being set up for later. they already foreshadowed it in s2e1 with tina calling her "the new carmy", i'm just putting 2 and 2 together

HIM SNORTING AT HER LOOKING AT THEM. THEY'RE GIGGLING TOGETHER. I'M DYING

wait those were in a box last ep and the box was by the window. carmy was looking at them, they had camera focus. so why are they by the kitchen now? did he move them? why'd he move them? why, carmy, why would you do that i wonder?

"i bet it felt really good wearing it." "yeah, it did" gosh they're really going for this huh. they're stealing looks at each other, carmy's opening up...see if they go on like this they're both gonna get to the Point of No Return too quickly. so this is going to stop, and i have an inkling why (it's the one thing i'm spoiled for!) but...my gosh

syd tucking her hair behind her ear before asking him a question? girllllll you're In It

"i doubt i'm gonna tell you to f//k off" him admitting he'd probably tell her whatever she wanted to know? absolutely groundbreaking i love it this is adorable

"when you got that call. that three-star call" "f//k off" HE'S LAUGHING AND THE DIMPLES AND THE SMILE ARE OUT IT'S SO CUTE they're straight up flirting at this point, like, full stop. damn flirterers they're too cute

and she asks the question anyway! and he answers it anyway! his answer being panic -> dread isn't great, but he answers it! and makes a joke at the end and she laughs and makes another joke and he laughs!! it's great!! it's intimate, it's funny, it's soft and honest...this is an amazing conversation and their relationship literally cannot continue forward from here or else they're gonna get to first base way faster than the show's paced for so...come on out, miss complication, i know you're waiting in the wings...

oh no. that's mold. not the complication i was thinking of, but definitely a complication

"mold is the death knell" yuuuup i effing knew it oh gosh this is horrible

fun side note: the crapbox college apartment i lived in with 5 other girls for 3 years was closed for reno for like 2 full years after i finally moved out b/c the walls were just apparently full on mold behind the drywall. i heard about that and was like oh that explains the breathing problems (mold allergy!) from 18-21. huh.

they're just full on calling natalie mom. the foreshadowing is not subtle

carmy and syd work so well together and i'm about to get Violent about it aren't i

also carmy's writing in blue, syd's in red. stability and passion, love and loyalty, boldness and serenity, aggression and passivity.

just a note, those two colors make purple, aka the color that represents creativity, wisdom, wealth, and enlightenment. just saying, you know, if they wanted to make purple or something

[starstruckpurpledragon]

Tagged by @icedteaandoldlace for the 15 Mutuals, 15 Questions meme

Are you named after anyone? My name is a family name on my mom's side, though specifically I'm named after my mom's favorite cousin. Different spellings, though. I absolutely adored her growing up and I missed her very much when she moved away.

When was the last time you cried? Given the wasps in my house and the ongoing renovation work... yesterday, late last night. Stress crying sucks and makes me more stressed because I can't really control it. That said, I feel a lot better about things today.

Do you have kids? Nope, but I have a nephew. Very adorable. Recently got a new stuffed animal during a trip to a cave. A bat, named Bat-Bat. His dad keeps hoping to convince him to go with Bruce instead. :D

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yes and no. It's situational, really. Who I'm with and what their tolerance for sarcasm is and what my mood is at the time.

What sports do you play/have you played? I played soccer and softball in elementary school. I was much better at soccer than softball but I didn't really enjoy it at the time.

What’s the first thing you notice about people? How they treat other people. I kinda suspect I'm a little face-blind so what people say and do make a bigger impression on me than physical appearance.

What’s your eye color? Green, except when they're blue

Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings

Any special talents? Fanfic writing. :D But I can also do some pretty silly muppet voices, all the better to entertain my nephew with. Or do impressions of Golem from LoTR with.

Where were you born? A hospital in Kentucky, of the blue grass and the fast horsies.

What are your hobbies? Aside from writing fanfic, there's playing video games and whatever fun craft has most recently caught my attention. Sometimes paint by number, cross stitch, etc... and when my piano isn't blocked in by boxes (thanks, reno) I'll play that.

Do you have pets? I have a dog named Estelle. She's a terrier and minpin mix who loves snuggles, snacks, and chasing squirrels.

How tall are you? About 5'8"

Favorite subject in school? English class, though my computer science courses were a close second.

Dream job? I wanted to be an author as a kid, which I kind of feel like I've fulfilled by writing fanfic. I am a software engineer, which I do really enjoy... but I think dream job would really have to be librarian. A school librarian, perhaps.

Tagging @goldheartedchaoticdisaster, @fezwearingjellybananas, @shrinkthisviolet, @vexic929, @incorrectcoldflashblog, @gender-luster, @a-redharlequin, @ageless-aislynn, @terrie01, @hawkstincan, @stars-are-just-ghosts, @autisticharrywells, @violetteatime, @sophiainspace, @bottom-of-the-riverbed

[systemic-stupidity]

https://www.tumblr.com/systemic-stupidity/756203930375143424/im-so-bored-someone-plz-send-me-asks-lol?source=share for this ask game

🩷 📻 ⚡️ 🌳 🍰

Omg our first ask!!! Thank you!!

🩷- do you have any subsystems?

Yup! We have one: Corvo is the host of a subsystem of two alters, himself and Orev.

Their existence and relationship to one another as well as the greater system is complicated; Corvo split due to our nightmare sleep disorder and one particularly stressful month of nightmares which all followed the same character (him) and storyline. So he came prepackaged with a backstory and abilities like shape shifting into a secondary form, which we referred to as his ‘nightmare form’. That nightmare form was a weird raven monster that was indeed just another shape for Corvo to take, and then… Well. Over time, they gradually became more and more distinct from one another until they split into a subsystem, with the human host Corvo and his nightmare form, now known as Orev. (I hope that all makes sense, I know it’s confusing- feel free to ask more questions about them and we can try to clarify!)

📻-does your system have any in-sys relationships? (Familial, romantic, platonic etc.)

Also yes! We have quite a few lol. Addy and Alex (who we don’t mention much since they’re purely internal nowadays) are a married couple who act as moms to the younger alters. Two of said young alters consider each other brothers. Ushejiel and Corvo are dating, and Ushejiel has a platonic relationship with Reno. I think that’s all of them?

(Damn we really need to make like. A master post of all of our alters so we don’t just throw names at you lol)

⚡️-what does switching feel like to you? Does it vary between alters?

Oh god, it varies between alters, between what triggered the switch, how tired we are… it changes a lot. Generally, it’s pretty subtle, like a very slow shift in hue between colors, where you can’t quite pinpoint *precisely* when that purple became green, but you can identify at the very end that yup, that was purple and this is green now. That or, for deliberate switches, we conceptualize of it as literally taking someone’s hand (or gently guiding them by their shoulder, waist, etc) and pulling them away from front and taking their place, a similar motion and sensation to helping someone through a doorway or stand from a sitting position. In those cases, we can quite literally feel the sensation of someone’s hand and our head feels a little like we did a half-turn, even if we’re completely stationary.

🌳-do alters have their own rooms/areas in the headspace?

Yup! We actually have a map of our houses around here somewhere… but our headspace is made up of a grouping of houses in the middle of a dense forest, plus a library. One home is for Addy, Alex, and the younger alters;Ushejiel, Corvo, and Reno share another home. Our gatekeeper, Simon, lives in the library. Everyone else either has their own homes or kind of float between guest rooms.

🍰-are you ‘out’ as a system to anyone?

Another yes! Some of our close friends know, as do our partners. Actually, so does one of our professors who is also our advisor for our master’s degree- we had to explain to her why we kept changing topics and why settling on a thesis was so difficult. We ended up actually writing an award winning essay about having DID, although remained anonymous when submitting it for safety.

Sorry this was so long 😅 evidently we have a lot to say today!

-M

[isabellehemlock]

Trick or treat!

Hi Bee!! Thanks for sending me this ✨️🎃💖

For those not familiar I've been informed that I am meant to reply "with anything that is making you happy these days." As I am always down for a Polyanna-style Glad Game, here we go, in no particular order:

Naturally for me, the list got long, putting the rest under the cut lol:

The fall season. It's my fave - though yes the MN weather is like brrrr, but some days it's that peak dark academia aesthetic and nourishes me like no other

Scorpio season!! Hello fellow one (gonna be real embarrassed if I managed to mix yours up with someone else's, I apologize now if i have!) ~ happy Scorpio to us and to all the other Scorpio friends I've managed to somehow find across fandom spaces (ironically I did a comparison chart in my personal server just to see, and sure enough most were Scorpios and Cancers lol, make of that what you will 😅)

Going to be Catholic on Main for a sec and share how much I feel interconnected to this time of the liturgical calendar and look forward to All Soul's/Saint's Day ❤️

My stress levels have gone way down thanks to no med forms or hospital visits for a while and fingers crossed for good test results in the spring (but I am hopeful and feeling lighter)

My children are heading into pre-teen age dynamics and it's a joy to see their personas and identieis emerging with beautiful expressions of their characters

We are half way through floor renos and hope the removal of wall to wall carpeting will be better for my lungs full time - the air purifiers have helped!

I get to take my passion for creativity and am currently helping on brochures for an apostolate in our province

My Godson was approved for SSDI which opens up so many more resources and consistency for him and I rejoice 🙏🏻

After an extended break due to real life events, after three MONTHS I'm currently writing the tail end of my dark fic, the last three chapters. I'm 12k+ in already and plan for about 20k to 30k total over the next three weeks. My hope is to post them back to back to back in 48hr intervals as a reward for people hanging in there for so long

October 2nd marked one year since I started a multi fandom mini server and it remains a highlight of my day ✨️

I wrapped all fandom projects - both ones I've modded, and participated in - with my last one going up tomorrow! - all save for one, the @tdvzine which is now in the creative stage! I'm going to making my biggest art piece to date - a two page spread in landscape format and I can't divulge two many details but honestly I'm certain it's going to take weeks and I can't wait. I also am so thrilled to have potentially over 100 submissions for this project! Like whoa!!

I'm about to start a spooky modern au piece for @zairaalbereo for OFMD - outlined, plotted, pinterest moodboard lol, it's happening!

A big thing is that just a few hours ago, I shared an invitation for a conversation with some friends on the server. If you're curious just let me know via DM, I'll pass it on to you as well 😘

And because it feels strange to end it with 13 points, I'll add one more:

To know that regardless of time, and space, there are people like you who are wishing me well and I hope you know I send that love right back in any way I can. Thank you for sending me this Bee, and I hope it brought a smile!

[wario-speedwagon]

"It's the summer of 1973, and Jack has nowhere else left to go. No one else left to turn to.

Peter is ridden with his own feelings of grief and betrayal. But he still has to answer the knock at the door."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Greetings, DSAF fandom. I come bearing a freshly microwaved angst one-shot, so come get it while it's hot!

Cuz as that one out-of-season movie said, "Never, ever let it cool!" Also, yes, I am drinking hot chocolate right now, no reason in particular. *disgusting slurp*

Jokes aside, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it! <3

Full text below the cut if links aren't your style :)

Hot Chocolate

He had nowhere else to go; his house was seized, he didn’t have his wallet on him–he must’ve pocketed it while he was out–he was wanted for some reason if the Reno Gazette headline was to be believed…

The long journey here was a hazy memory as he looked back on it, probably because he spent most of it lost in his own head.

But he made it. This was Peter’s address.

He eagerly knocked on the door in front of him, but instead of anticipating relief, he became self-aware: how would Peter even react to how scarred he was all over? He hadn’t even been able to shower–other than the heavy rain right now–he was still in his bloodstained uniform–

The door began to click open and Jack hadn’t even thought of what to say.

Peter appeared behind the door. He looked worn down himself, but his face became incredulous as he surveyed his visitor.

“Peter… I failed… I couldn’t save her.”

Peter still looked back at him like a stranger.

“I don’t know what to do. I… I need help.”

His voice had come back, but it was still quite inconsistent.

“...Jack…?”

The man’s humbled silence seemed to confirm it.

“Jack, why are you here?”

“I have nowhere else to go– I don’t know what to do–”

Peter was afraid of his answer, but he had to ask.

“What happened to you?” It came out with more disappointment than concern.

“I…”

Jack didn’t know how to start. He realized just how outlandish the words that came to him would sound if he said them out loud.

“I don’t think you’ll believe me…”

Peter didn’t know how he should feel. Should he want to believe what he has to say? Was it naïve to hope he’d say that none of this was true? Should he believe him if he did?

“Just try me.”

Jack again tried to conjure the words to explain.

“...I was– i-it was Henry–”  No, he should start with Dee– 

“I l-left her behind, I didn’t mean for–  S-So I– I got a job there to– to find her–  And then he– H-H-He– He– It was h-him– He–” Dizzying nausea and an involuntary hand over his own mouth stopped him from continuing. 

Peter was flabbergasted. This person was so unlike his brother; he’d never seen Jack even remotely nervous like this before. He didn’t know what the appropriate response should be.

“Come– Just come inside.”

Jack nodded, mouth still covered as Peter ushered him out of the rain with an arm around his back. He was drenched and cold to the touch. He was shaking, but given the sorry display he just witnessed, Jack probably wasn’t shivering from just the rain.

He sat Jack down onto the couch.

“Hold on…”

Peter disappeared around the corner.

Time had stopped as Jack sat in that living room alone. He took in his current situation. 

…He was home now. Or close enough to it. He was safe for the first time since...–even if just for now.

Peter came back with some towels.

“Dry yourself off. I’ll go make us some hot chocolate. Does that sound fine with you?”

“Yeah…” It unintentionally came out as a voiceless whisper, but his nod answered for him.

Peter disappeared again to the kitchen. He figured Jack would need time alone to settle his nerves. But honestly, he also needed it for himself.

You shouldn’t be doing this. That man’s a criminal!… right? You just let a wanted criminal into your home–!

Faith, Peter. Hear him out first, he’s your brother for Christ’s sake!

Jack felt bad. The pale grey towels were turning a sticky maroon where he wiped. Dear lord, he hadn’t even checked a mirror since… that. What did Peter see him like right now?  The deluge of thoughts was creeping back again.

Who was he right now?

I’m dead. I’m a dead man walking.

Jack felt deeply unsettled again. 

He remembered the still-searing lines outlining his body with persistent, sensitive pain. They had closed after just a couple days untreated but they still weren’t fully healed. Nor were a couple of his bones either.

After those nights, this is nothing.

He made the mistake of pulling up a sleeve. He was disturbed by a reddish purple line down the under- and outsides of his forearm, but the rest of his arm had also assumed an unsightly jaundice.

Fuck, this was reality, though, wasn’t it?

You’re like them now.  Dead.

No, this isn’t real.  None of this is! This is all just a dead man’s fantasy.

That voice, that conversation, Fredbear– Heh– Fredbear.

I’ve gone insane, haven’t I?

Am I really dead, then? What’s going on? What is all this?

Can you do this for us?

Stop that, Jack, not now.

I need you to promise that you’ll save everyone. Please. Make the world brand new.

Jack, you’re insane, that never happened! It couldn’t have. You’re not here anymore.

No, I chose this.  I chose this.

“Here we are–…”

His voice snapped him out of it, and a nostalgic aroma carried Jack back to the living room around him. Peter had walked in, mugs in both hands. 

Peter carefully handed one to Jack who took it with both hands. While Peter pulled the coffee table toward them, Jack contemplated the mug that he held on his lap. He could feel its intense warmth course throughout his hands and thighs. 

It felt nice.

Peter moved the bloodied towels aside for room to sit.

“S-Sorry about…”

“Oh. Don’t… worry about it. They were cheap.” Not especially, but whatever.

Peter seated himself, and then the two sat there in a moment of silence.

Peter thought of how to break the silence, but seeing that Jack was transfixed on the hot chocolate he wasn’t drinking, he figured he’d respect the quiet for a couple minutes until he seemed more at ease. 

Peter began to drink from his own mug which subconsciously inspired Jack to start drinking his as well.

He tried to resist the urge to steal rude glances at the person right next to him. Jack’s gaunt, beaten appearance was incredibly concerning, enough to warrant a call for the hospital if he weren’t a wanted fugitive. 

Peter wanted to ask a million questions about what he’d been through, but Jack was woefully unprepared last time he tried to answer.

He’d need to ask simple, specific questions, or else Jack would probably bite off more than he could chew again.

“Jack, I’m sorry, but I need to ask you this directly.  Don’t... explain yourself, just ‘yes’ or ‘no’:

Did you abduct Dee?”

“No, b-but–”  Peter stopped him there.

“So someone else abducted her then?”

“Yeah.”

Some of Peter’s tension was relieved.

“Good… good, I’m glad… Okay, now tell me–slowly. What happened the day she went missing?”

He could see Jack becoming visibly upset.

“Y-You’ll never forgive me…”

Peter considered carefully how to respond.

“I’ll never forgive myself.”

“...You made some mistake… and she got abducted because of it, is that the general idea?”

“I… I guess, yeah…”

“What was that mistake? You and Dee went to Fredbear’s for her birthday, right?”

“I left her there alone. I assumed it’d be fine–”

Jack was losing his cool again.

“–it’d be fine, her friends, the adults were all there, th-they told me it’d be fine–”

Jack remembered who “they” were.

“I just left her there with HIM!”

“Who?”

“Henry!”

“Henry?”

“Peter, what’s going on?”

Caroline was standing midway down the stairs, holding a sleeping baby in her arms.

“Sorry, did we wake you?”

“Who is this?”

“He’s a-an old friend of mine. He’s having a bit of a… crisis I’m trying to work him through.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.  I’ll leave you two in privacy. Holler if you need me for anything.”

“Thanks, hon. Good night.”

“G’night, love. Oh, and tell him he’s allowed to spend the night here if he needs.”

“Will do.”

She yawned back up the stairs.

“So… Henry?”

“...Henry Miller.”

“Miller. That’s right, he’s the owner, right? They kept getting statements from him on the news every so often.”

“It was him.”

This was serious. 

“You mean he abducted Dee?”

“Positive.”

“And how do you know this for sure?”

Jack didn’t respond. He looked deeply conflicted. Hesitant.

“…Jack, you’re my brother, but it’s still your word against the authorities’. I can’t just believe you if you don’t tell me what happened.”

That turned out to be the wrong thing to say, as Jack only retreated further from talking.

There was no way he could begin to explain what happened in that room.

“Okay…um…”

Peter tried to think of a different question.

“Then why don’t you explain how you got so banged up?”

He could see Jack’s brain trying to come up with something to say, but still no dice.

“Okay…then–”

“...He…”

“Hm?”

“He… killed me…”

“...What?”

Jack was afraid to elaborate.

“He… killed you?”

“...”

“O-Okay, how did he… kill you…?”

He was visibly unwell again. 

“... Springl–”

“...Spring?”

No, there was no way Peter would know what that was.

And he desperately didn’t want to explain.

Before he knew it, Jack’s left ankle felt warm and wet, and he realized the mug slipped out of his fingers onto the floor.

It wasn't unlike how his blood felt oozing down his impaled calves.

He couldn’t collect himself to apologize. He just stared blankly at the spill, barely registering how Peter rushed to get some paper towels.

When Peter entered his gaze to sop up the spill, Jack attempted an apology.

“I– I’m–”

“Don’t worry about it.” He said it through a sigh.

He didn’t know what the right thing to do was. Jack was clearly shell-shocked, so he felt bad wanting to get answers out of him that made more sense. 

But if he couldn’t believe in him without a shadow of a doubt, then he couldn’t in good conscience harbor him in his home.

No, what am I thinking? It doesn’t matter what I think; if the police ever find out I interacted with him without alerting them– 

“Jack… I have a family to think about. You– You know you’re wanted… F-For her murder.”

He barely responded.

“I want to have faith in you, but no matter what I think, it’s dangerous for us if you stay here for long.

…If you won’t explain anything more, th-then I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to leave now instead of later.”

He didn’t visibly react, but Jack was gravely considering Peter’s ultimatum.

“Here. Finish my hot chocolate, and if you’re not feeling up to it after then, then…”

“Can– …Can I at least spend the night…?”

Peter carefully calculated his request.

“...Fine.  But I’m dropping you off at a bus stop early in the morning, alright?”

“Could I borrow some money, too? Henry… took my wallet. When he killed… me…”

“Y-Yeah, sure.”

Jack was really insistent on saying that Henry “killed” him.  It was… disturbing. 

“Jack, if you’re up to it, could I still ask more about your injuries?”

“No, p-please… I’m tired…”

You won’t believe me anyway.  He couldn’t say that to him. Peter would always hear him out, and Jack couldn’t bear to be proven right.

*sigh*  “Okay, you’ve had a rough night. Why don’t I get you a change of clothes and a blanket and pillow? You can shower in the morning.”

Jack dreaded the idea of seeing all of his wounds bare, let alone putting soap to them. No, he’d also have to confront them tonight just to get changed.

For now, he just focused on finishing Peter’s lukewarm mug.

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: It Happened One Fight by Maureen Lee Lenker

3/5. Releases 7/11/2023.

For when you're vibing with... Old Hollywood, celebrity romance but make it vintage, oops! we're married, and light enemies to lovers.

Joan Davis has been unable to escape being paired with her screen partner, Dash Howard--no matter how much she hates him, they're box office gold together. She's hoping that her upcoming marriage to rising star Monty will give her a new image. Except, whoops, a prank gone wrong (by Dash) means that Dash and Joan are legally married. The only way to get a quick divorce is to star in one last movie with Dash in Reno, where they can split after six weeks. But during that six weeks... Joan begins to wonder if there's more to her irritating rival than what meets the eye...

I'm actually a really big fan of older cinema, and I love Old Hollywood. Unfortunately, while I think this is a well-done book and will definitely capture the hearts of certain readers, it didn't quite get me going.

Quick Takes:

--I really do love the premise here. The Reno divorce was something so many celebrities relied upon back in the day--and it's perfect for a romance novel. You can tell Lenker knows her shit about the tricks of the trade, too. Dash was just an everyguy until his first wife saw something in him and helped him remake his image, Joan's own image remaking with her engagement to Monty (who has quite the involved roommate)--those are all the beats of shit Old Hollywood used to pull all the time, and I like that.

--Where I think we're a little lost is in an uncertainty about the setting. It's definitely detailed like Old Hollywood should be, but it doesn't quite hit home for me. Some of it is in the dialogue, which is quite 21st century modern. There's a modern vibe throughout the book, and here's the thing: I normally don't care about that with historicals... To an extent. Very few historicals are truly accurate, you know? But it's easier to get a sense of a really well-tread setting like Regency and Victorian, I think--that's not Lenker's fault. What makes the 1930s, and especially 1930s Hollywood more challenging is that in the grand scheme? It's a lot more tangible. I can watch a movie and see... if not a depiction of how real people acted and talked, then at least how they wanted to be seen. It's more familiar, so it's easier for a book to feel not-quite-there, I think.

However, I also feel like there was a lot of grit taken out of the world, and I tend to wonder if 1930s Hollywood just might not be the right setting for a lighthearted historical romance. Perhaps a heavier historical romance would've made more sense. Maybe I'm just too aware. This reads more like a movie made in the 1930s than a book about people who made movies in the 1930s, if that makes sense, so perhaps my expectations were off in that sense. And to be clear, I'm fully aware that Regencies and Victorians gloss over the bad shit too--but I think there's a higher sense of stress in those I prefer, at least, and again this book suffers a little from being too recently-set.

--In that sense, I feel like it wasn't quite caustic enough for me. There's a sense of the screwball to this, which I think is easier to pull off onscreen than it is on the page, because you have charismatic actors doing hijinks and allowing you to suspend disbelief, whereas here I'm like "okay, this is a lot for a grown man to be doing". I just need to stay away from books where pranks are pulled--and that's on me.

--The writing is entertaining and it all makes sense. It hit all the right beats. I should have connected more than I did, and again, I feel like those who prefer lighter books will probably connect with it more. I just didn't get the sense that these two needed to be together, which is important for me as a reader.

The Sex Stuff:

There is one extended sex scene, which is good and covers a lot of the bases. But after that, you get a lot of closed door action, and I really don't understand why that is.

This is one of those books that I think could've been pushed an extra level; it almost had a thing, but for me, it didn't quite get there.

Thanks to Netgalley and Sourcebooks Casablanca for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[umbral-stigmata-unbound]

Meet the Writer

ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘɪᴄᴋ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛ ᴍᴜꜱᴇ(ꜱ) ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ?

(CANON MUSES) - Well, this blog started as a Sephiroth RP Blog, as my early partners know, and so to be honest, it was a long time coming. But start of the fandom is up and down with cause and level of interest, and my draw to Sephiroth was slow, but eventually I hit an age and a state of returned interest in the fandom where I'm like...damn I'd love to play him. I adored his character, his cool collected crazy villain nature and also his complicated beginnings and the tragedy. And I'd played a few complicated villain characters before so I hoped to be able to tackle him accurate. Tried it years ago, maybe...ten more or less? maybe less lol but...I was way too intimidated, guys. Granted, I was constantly trying to tackle AC Seph so, sure, but I just didn't feel like I could do him justice and I gave up. But the resurgence Remake brought finally brought me to give him a try and I have adored exploring him ever since. The good, the bad, the ugly, and all the relationships in between and I'm excited to continue exploring. I adore Sephiroth for the tragedy, and every level of it, and that is why I took him on. The rest? Well, Vincent was my original fave and adore him to similar yet different depths and I love exploring all his hurt and pain and layers as well. Our dark dramatic monster mash corpse is just too good not to partake in, and over the last few years, I've adored developing my fanon layers to add depth to factors of his history or nature. Kadaj? Short answer, I sympathize with the angry hurt child that he is and the rage he wants to spill on the world, and the darkness he can threaten to weild, and his need to be embraced at the end of the day. Reno? It started as shits and giggles and because I thought he'd be funny to play. Now? I'm in too deep and I love this fucker. My newest muses, as of me doing this, are Evan Townshend and Nero the Sable, and though I'm still working on developing my muse with them, especially the latter, I just...adore them. Babies. They are my babies. (OCs) - I haven't actually had in depth, ongoing chances to play my FF7 OC Aurelia, which is absolutely on me and my lack of development and confidence. She started from a self insert OC that was purely in my head and once drawn on paper XD she occupied my night time fantasies to play out fanfiction like fulfillment and she was basically made to ship with Vincent (please, judge away, I cringe hard now). However, with thanks to new inspiration and a lil help of an ex-friend, I'm proud of how I've remade her and I really do want to play into what she is now and develop her further, because i have a special love for Deepground, and I would adore a chance to play her in all her power but in all her weakness, too, and figure out how she connects and deals with the world around her.

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ?

Not that I can think of? I can't say I don't like writing what I'm about to say, I do, but lets define this as what do I occasionally have problem writing--angst. And my only problem, is chaotic home life has bred such a deep ingrained need to avoid conflict that sometimes I fumble that into RP replies (in ways that it may makes sense, but also in ways where it feels OOC and/or like they're far more self aware than they should be in that moment). So it's something I've been working on and getting better with!

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ?

Angst and Fluff in equal measure, even if one or the other border on self indulgent, so long as it's fun and satisfying for me and my partners. I like pushing our characters to strains and pains more than we've experienced so far, or in different ways and what it brings out of them. But I also adore those fluff moments where it can just be a tender embrace, a loving moment, or being told those words or given that care that they needed but were denied in canon. It pleases me deeply, both of them.

ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ?

They just happen. I don't often sit there and try to come up with something, it's just they pop up when writing, when thinking through the character, or more often through RPs and asks. If it feels like it really fits, especially if I can expand on it in a way that weaves well into the character, it becomes a satisfying headcanon.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ɪɴ ꜱɪʟᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴏʀ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴍᴜꜱɪᴄ?

Music, unless unable and/or I started without it and now I'm in a flowing writing zone and/or whatever I'm writing is short. I'm literally listening to music right now XD granted it's on repeat from me using it to answer asks but, still. Also yes, fanfics and sometimes specific threads or partners garner very specific music vibes or playlists.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇᴘʟɪᴇꜱ ᴏʀ ᴡɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ?

Hmm, this depends. I mean, I guess as a majority, I wing them. There will sometimes be planning out with a partner, and I will keep the plan in mind, especially if we're wanting the scene to end with a specific destination. But, for the most part, I wing them I guess? Like, I read a reply, I let my brain figure out if there's any automatic sparks of reaction from muse, and with or without that, I get to work.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ꜱʜɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ?

Hell yeah. When it's balanced, and not just smut (though I love me some smut), I adore shipping. Especially when we can work in all the complicated positives and negatives and the personal discoveries that the dynamics bring. And sometimes the ships are just so fdnsjkdnj bjnfajknfjks.

ᴡʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀʟɪᴀꜱ/ɴᴀᴍᴇ?

Ash, though only a few people use that. Real name is Jordan, which I'm sure I put in my mun bio, but I don't mind either XD Ash comes from my middle name which a friend suggested I take on if I ever decided to get a name change to go along with accepting my genderqueer identity but I'm fine with either. They're both me~

ᴀɢᴇ?

Freshly 29 ~

ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ?

March 31st

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ(ꜱ)?

Purple, red, black, gold.

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴏɴɢ(ꜱ)?

Eh, I can't say I have specific enough favorites. I like any song, old and new, that I've come across and collected, that can either have a nice beat, be devestatingly emotional and beautiful, or dramatic/epic movie level. Also a good guess for my current musical taste? Sleep Token is my every vibe right now with multiple muses, fics, and ships lmao.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

Can't remember the last movie i watched and finished, mostly rewatch shows these days. A tie between 'The Mummy Returns' and 'Frozen II' it is, I guess lmao.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

Mashle. I fucking love this crazy show. My Hero is a close tie, kind of been watching them back and forth.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱᴏɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪꜱᴛᴇɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ?

If my current one counts, Ado cover of Unravel by TK from Tokyo Ghoul.

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜰᴏᴏᴅ?

I can't choose??? How can you even make me. Too many options, between fast food options to home cooked meals. Going with the indulgent meal I keep getting a craving for and that never fails to be delicious, Yellow Curry with shrimp from this local place where I live. So good.

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ?

When it plays it's role properly, fall/autumn. I like the balance of the cold without it being too severe. The small of the cold earth, the fallen leaves. Summer is my enemy, I become a fat puddle.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ʙᴇꜱᴛ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ?

Not entirely, I'm pretty even with everyone, and I adore all my partners and friends in different ways, because they and I are all so individual! I love all you guys! Though sometimesrufus has damn near basically earned that title XD My Rufus~

Tagged by: no one, I STOLE IT

Tagging: anyone who wants!!

[final-fantasy-imagines]

Ah request are open! Im so happy!! :) can I request headcannons of cloud and reno getting their face peppered with kisses by the reader. Idk if you have seen that tiktok trend lol it’s adorable. Thank you^-^

Hey there! I'm so sorry for the long wait and I hope you're still interested in this because it was a really cute idea and I enjoyed writing it. Have a good day/night and stay safe! <3

Characters: Cloud Strife, Reno

Reacting to their s/o peppering their faces with kisses (gn!reader)

Cloud Strife

When you do it for the first time, watch him getting all flustered and embarrassed. He’s completely taken aback by your actions and has no idea how he should react, so he probably just stands there and stares at you for a few moments, his face red like a beetroot. It’s pretty easy to fluster him anyways but in a situation like that, he definitely can’t hide it, no matter how hard he tries.

Even if it becomes a habit of yours to pepper his face with kisses, for example when you’re particularly happy or something like that, it’s safe to assume that he’ll never get used to it. Like, it always takes him by surprise and he blushes like crazy every time because he’s simply not used to affectionate gestures like that.

One thing he’d definitely ask of you is to not do it in public. It’s not that he’s ashamed of showing that the two of you are incredibly close; it’s more about the act that he doesn’t want the others to constantly tease him about his flustered state. Especially Tifa and Aerith wouldn’t shut up about it, and it’s already enough that you tease him about it quite frequently.

Cloud isn’t an overly affectionate person, in the sense that he rarely initiates affection himself but he sure as hell enjoys receiving it, although he’d probably never admit it. With that being said, he definitely doesn’t mind you peppering his face with kisses because it’s just such an adorable gesture that makes him absolutely loved and appreciated.

Reno

Just like Cloud, Reno is a bit baffled when you cup his cheeks and start to press kisses all over his face out of the blue. There’s a slight blush on his cheeks and a hint of confusion in his eyes but he still can’t stop the smile that tugs on the corners of his mouth. It’s an adorable sight, to say the least, and probably the main reason why you do it quite frequently.

Don’t expect him to get overly flustered because of your actions though. He’s pretty self-confident and it’s not easy to catch him off-guard, so while he’s definitely a bit surprised when you just start to pepper his face with kisses he won’t turn into a blushing, stammering mess because of it. In fact, he might even tease you a bit because you’re obviously so in love with him that a simple kiss isn’t enough for you.

Reno will sure as rain return the favor when you least expect it, maybe to wake you up in the morning or when you’re lounging around together. Soon enough, it becomes an actual habit, although he definitely doesn’t want you to do it when his colleagues are around – after all, he has a reputation to lose, and he doesn’t want them to tease him for acting like a lovesick fool.

He won’t ever admit it but it honestly makes him feel so loved when you kiss him like that. He can’t stop smiling at you, although he’s sure that he looks like an absolute idiot but he really couldn’t care less. Also, it’s obvious that it makes you happy to shower him with affection, so there’s no way he’d complain about it.

Taglist: @cosmicdarlingx, @thevoidwriting , @fandomatakeover18,@sixdaysofsilverashes, @theimaginaryheir, @randomfandomimagine

[slavghoul]

Interview from SLAM #120

With their fifth album "Impera", the Swedish rockers with an affinity for pop, herald a new, demonic age in their band history. The transition from the previous album "Prequelle", at the end of which Cardinal Copia was elevated to Papa Emeritus IV, is eerie, ghostly and flowing. We chatted with Tobias Forge, the mastermind behind this embodiment of an anti-church, about the concept of the current output and its connections to the predecessors. In addition, the prince of macabre rock shares his thoughts on the story with us, explains where he finds inspiration for his often mammoth artistic constructs and gives insights into the musical demands of the new diabolical mass. But first, even the GHOST frontman has to deal with a few technical challenges and worldly problems...

Are you all right?

Yeah, sorry I'm late, but there were some technical problems.

You must be doing a lot of interviews? 

No, not really, it's more about the technical aspect, so that everything works smoothly. We start our tour with Volbeat tonight, there are a lot of things to think about before the first show. Rehearsing, making sure everything is in place and everything works.

I can imagine that, but at least you are among the lucky ones who can already go on tour again!

Well, it takes a lot of confidence in the situation and we hope everything works out. Everything will be more relaxed as soon as we can play the first show today in Reno, Nevada, after that we know it's going as planned and everything is fine. Then in April and May we will be with you in Europe with the show, as long as nobody stops us.

Let's talk about the new album, but for that we have to go back in time to the last release "Prequelle". This was set in the 14th century at the time of the great plague. Now, a few years after it was released with that underlying theme, the world was and still is going through an all-changing pandemic. Was it witchcraft that you foresaw this development back then and tuned people in to the pandemic through the plague theme?

Possibly. Quite possible. Well, I don't know if that's really the right word for it now, but it was a stroke of luck. It was overwhelming. I really wish my new album isn’t so psychic, though.

When did the new material come into being and was it all written in one go or did you also use ideas that had been floating around in your head for some time? And what influence did the current pandemic have on your songwriting?

I tend to write all the time. A little something here, another one there, so when I write a new album, I ... (an incredibly loud voice from an oversized loudspeaker sounds and interrupts the conversation) I'm sorry, I'm already in the concert hall, they're doing line-check, but I can't get out and I have no place to retreat to. Hopefully it will be over soon. Where was I? Oh yes, I never start a new album with a blank sheet. There are always songs I can use. I actually always start writing new songs immediately after I finish an album. (The almost devilishly loud voice interrupts again). Goddamn motherfuckers! Okay, so as soon as I'm done with one album, I'm already planning ahead for the next one. So when the pandemic hit some of that .... (again the interruption by the infernally loud line-check) Ok, they'll be done soon. (Pause) In fact, I think they're done. So, the pandemic didn't really influence the album, the way the album was influenced by it was more from a practical point of view.

Aha, how so?

Actually, we wanted to record the album with a producer from the United States, actually make the whole album in the US. In the end, we had to move the production to Sweden, but at the time we were going to start recording, the travel restrictions came into effect. So the original producer couldn't come to Sweden from the United States and I couldn't fly to see him. There were a few things like that. But most of it was happy changes. For example, I went back to Klas Ählund as the producer, who had already worked with me on "Meliora". Making a new record together was a very nice reunion. So the changes due to the pandemic didn't really mean a negative influence. At least not on this album, it was the one before that that obviously caused a pandemic (laughs).

So it was more by chance that you decided to work with Klas Ahlund again, because you actually had other plans.

The decision to work with him was clearly mine, but actually something else was planned. Klas and I are friends, we hang out together, have dinners with our families and all of a sudden, when my intended producer dropped out, Klas mentioned that he surprisingly had a few months to spare. So I asked him if he wanted to produce the album and he said yes. That was pure luck, because normally he is very busy and would not have had time. Especially during this crisis, an incredible amount of albums were produced and so much music was made.

Yes, especially because most of the musicians couldn't go on tour, so many of them used the time to write and record an album.

Exactly. And we'll get to hear them all. All at once (laughs).

Okay, your explanations nip in the bud my thoughts of a grand plan to connect "Meliora" and "Impera". Especially when I saw the new artwork for the first time I was immediately reminded of the "Meliora" cover. Of course, both were created by Zbigniew Bielak, who has been designing your artwork since "Infestissumam". But especially these two were connected for me by the industrial aesthetics, the architecture, the mechanical devices and the fact that both have a big face in the centre of a big building and I wondered if this use of a whole series of similar motifs is an indication of the connection between the albums?

They are not connected in this way, (this time it is a deafening guitar that interrupts). I'm so infinitely sorry. I think I’m going to kill someone. The problem is: I just can't go anywhere else! No matter where I go, there are people everywhere who would overhear our conversation, but at the moment nothing is allowed to leak out. It's very strictly enforced, so I have to stay right here. Okay, looks like they're done again. So, it wasn't that just because we did another album with Klas, we went back to the old aesthetic, no, that wasn't the case. It was more that "Prequelle" was more in a pre-electronic, pre-industrialisation framework aesthetically. It was more medieval in a way. When I construct an album, I tend to conceive of the one that follows in an almost opposite way. It was more of a coincidence that it happened that way. I did a Klas album that was rocky, then I did something else and now I'm doing a rock album with Klas again. But I could just as well have produced a rock album with Rob Cavallo.

For me as an outsider, there were several coincidences and similarities between "Meliora" and "Impera". For example, you came back to the moniker Papa Emeritus instead of Cardinal Copia, who was active on "Prequelle". As you already mentioned, you worked with the same producer and the artwork is similar. But then again I read that "Impera" is supposed to be a seamless transition from "Prequelle". That the new album starts where the old one ends. I am confused. Please enlighten us a bit about the position of "Impera" and its connections within the Ghost universe.

With regard to Papa Emeritus, it was always the plan that Cardinal Copia would one day become Papa Emeritus IV. We never left the moniker Papa Emeritus behind, we simply saw in the Cardinal someone who was not yet ready to become a Papa. We experienced his journey to the point where he was anointed Papa Emeritus IV just at the end of the "Prequelle" tour.

The last album was set in the 14th century at the time of the great plague. "Impera", on the other hand, takes place in a much more modern age. Tell us a little more about the new setting and the concept behind it.

Well, as usual, it's all a bit ambiguous in the sense that it doesn't necessarily mean that the record now takes place exclusively in that particular time. It's not King Diamond, it's not that kind of story. It's more a symbol of something. "Prequelle" was about the plague, yes, but also about survival. It was an album about settling scores, the end, the potential annihilation of life. Whereas "Impera" is about the creation, the rise, the maintenance and the fall of an empire. I decided to portray this theme symbolically through a Victorian gothic industrial setting. But in doing so, it has more to do with modern times and modern life. But it simply results in similarities between the Victorian era with the Industrial Revolution and the here and now. In the sense that machines and computers make people completely superfluous. And once we have no task, no goal, no job, people don't feel very good. We need this sense of purpose, even if people don't like going to work. Work and having a purpose, a goal, that's essential for people. Sure, it's nice to take a sick day or two and sit at home and watch Netflix, but when you have nothing else in your life but sitting around thinking about what went wrong in your life, that's when things happen like the storming of the Capitol on 6 January 2021. Then shit happens, that's when people start burning books. So this time I'm highlighting more contemporary issues by showing pictures from the past.

Where does the inspiration for such large-scale themes come from? Do you just wake up one day and think to yourself: "Yes, this time I'm writing about a variety of problems of modern society in the mirror of its own past, which are repeated especially in the face of the age of the Industrial Revolution, and reconcile that with the rise and fall of an empire", or is there a longer process behind it that lets your motifs develop over a certain period of time?

A bit of both. The idea of writing a record around the central theme of empire came to me pretty specifically very soon. I was in Seattle, I think it was around 2014, and I went into this bookstore where I saw a book called "The Rule of Empires". The moment I saw the title, I knew what it was basically about. It's about the fact that every single empire that has risen in human history has fallen. That is inevitable. It always happens. This concept just spoke to me. Even then I knew that I would make an album about this theme one day. But then we did "Meliora", which had a slightly different theme, followed by "Prequelle". As soon as the latter was finished, I said to myself that the next album would be the one with the empire theme. Also because many of the things that happened politically in the world from 2017 onwards inspired me. A lot of the current events point to a certain reckoning, upheaval in many of the empires we know. But I also have a concept for the next album. But it's not crystal clear yet what exactly it will be until I actually realise it. It's never just about one particular thing. I will never make an album and say, "Oh, this is all about Martin Luther!" It will never be just about one person or be a historical account of one personality. I'm not interested in that. I'm more interested in a certain way of thinking, explaining things, painting a picture of something. But of course, for Ghost, everything has to fit together. It has to have some connection to something we've already done, it has to be something that is also graphically inspiring, it has to work with our stage show because we always want to take that to a new level as well. These and many more things are going around in my head when I'm making an album, preparing for it or even just creating the concept for it.

Your head seems very busy.

(laughs) Yes.

With regard to the music on "Impera", it seems more positive to me, almost optimistic in parts. Of course, it still has its spooky and sinister moments, but all in all it makes a brighter, less creepy and demonic impression. If you agree and I'm not imagining the evolution, explain why the music evolved in this direction and if you had any particular musical influences that inspired you during the writing process.

One thing I had in mind was that I wanted to write the songs, or at least some of them, in major instead of minor this time, because I always tend to write in minor. Actually, that came about because I said to myself, "Two of Iron Maiden's biggest songs are written in major keys." The Number Of The Beast and Run To The Hills are both written in the major key. I thought it would be exciting to see if I could do that. This then became especially apparent on the song "Kaisarion", which turned into a happy, uptempo, pep song. I'm not saying that song was inspired by "Run To The Hills", no, it was just inspired by the idea of an upbeat, uptempo major song because that's something I've never done before. Another thing I tried to change a little bit was that with slightly weirder songs I tend to either write them super proggy and very complex with lots of tempo changes and unusual tricks - or I write them more almost in a certain punk arrangement. A verse, chorus, verse, chorus and then chorus five more times. A very Ramones-like kind of arrangement. I was curious if I could write songs that didn't sound like Def Leppard but were in that style. Almost every song on their albums "Pyromania" or "Hysteria" consists of five different elements until they get to the chorus. Every track on "Hysteria" starts with a part, then comes a verse, then a kind of pre-chorus, which is followed by another pre-chorus and then another one and only then do they finally fucking arrive at the actual chorus. I experimented with that on the new album as well. You're supposed to think, "Oh, that's the chorus! No, that's the chorus now! Okay, but that's it now!" Not that it was meant to sound like Def Leppard, but it was a thought experiment where I was trying out how long I could let a song develop and develop before I get to the actual point. I didn't do that on every song, but on some. A good example would be "Spillways"; it's very fast and crunchy but has four parts before it gets to the actual chorus. It's very easy to repeat yourself and fans might quickly say, "Oh, that's what a Ghost song sounds like!" I think there's a very small section of our fans who would love it if I just wrote "Opus Eponymous" over and over again. Which of course I could do from a purely technical point of view, but it would be very bad for creativity. I try to avoid that and that's why I experiment. On some albums more, on others less. On some songs much more, on others much less and on some I just let it go.

/Original text by Christoph Höhl