#how bad is this gonna fuck me up on a scale of 1-10

[glove23]

me instantly crying the moment Gerard asks for his story to no longer be his, for it to be elodys

[angel-noaxod]

Even more incorrect quotes with the Shaw pack

.

.

darlin: there's no need to be afraid. i don't bite!

literally anyone: yeah but do you stab?

darlin:

darlin: i don't bite :))

----

davey: and if you're gonna call me cute, then, you be-

angel: *giggle*

davey: i-

angel: pubby

davey, agressively inhales, desperate not to be flustered: stop. it.

----

sweetheart: sam can't be good at everything, maybe he's a bad kisser or something?

darlin: no he's good at that too.

sweetheart: oh, i see.

sweetheart:

sweetheart: wait what-

----

asher: on a scale of "dammnn daniel" to "free sha vaca do", how you feelin'?

angel: i'm between "it's an avocado, thanks" and "how you defeat captain america", but as a solid answer i would have to say "i don't need a degree to be a clothing hanger". how 'bout you milo?

milo: prob'ly road work ahead.

davey: i speak many languages and this is none of them-

----

*post more davey character development*

angel: is that your hand on my ass??

davey: it's an accident.

angel: your fucking hand is still on my ass davey

davey, smirking: it's still an accident.

----

angel in literally every comfort video: i'm fine.

angel:

angel: *passes out*

----

sam: i ain't sayin' shit.

darlin: do it cowboy.

asher: fuckin' do it.

sam: *sigh*

sam, rapping: i'm a i'm a i'm a i'm a farm booy

----

christian: *snort* nice onesie, does it come in mens?

asher: i think you come in men enough for all of us

christian:

davey:

milo:

amanda:

----

*when they first found darlin at age 18*

davey: rate your pain, 1-10

darlin, who has a broken leg, bruises, and cuts: pi. minimal but never ending.

davey: dad what kind of fucked up hellhole did you find them in?

----

sam: shit darlin! you alright?!

darlin: . what?

sam: didn't that hurt?!

darlin: yeah? and?

----

marie: you look like your father in that suit

davey who's about to host something very important and is sweating not visibly but violently: so i look like a dead man? great-

----

angel with their cat: ma'am, it has been reported lately that you do, in fact, have little paw-paws and a meow-meow button nose. would you like to add a comment to this?

their cat: meow.

angel: riveting.

davey, who just walked in their bedroom to get socks: am i interrupting something-

----

asher: -and this is a baby jumping spider :)

angel, being deadly afraid of spiders already: you're telling me this shit jumps babies??!!

----

asher: ughhhh, wifi's down.

sam: modern technology is really somethin' else. in my ol' days, we didn't have all this new shit

milo: well yea' but you had other cool shit

asher: yeah! like dinosaurs and Moses!

sam:

davey:

----

christian who just told a very not-funny joke: must be hard not being able to laugh

angel, basically hating christian to their very core: i am able to laugh

angel: i've just never heard you say anything funny.

the pack: YYAAOOOWW

----

random kid in the pack being babysitted by their alpha, about to go to bed: goodnight moon

kid: goodnight trees

kid: goodnight ghosts that only i can see

davey: you've been spending way too much time with asher

kid: he's my favorite babysitter

davey: not anymore he's not-

[kennysboxergf]

Attractiveness scale

Im trying to sleep at the moment but the sleep just ain’t coming ya know so im gonna post this and dip but I wanted to rate the Beta Squad members and a few of the guests by attractiveness for fun 🤷‍♀️

this is personal so like not who’s conventionally attractive but who is to me 🤭

the ten ppl I will be ranking are Sharky, Kenny, Chunkz, AJ, Niko (obvs) and then Darkest, Filly, Gib, HP and Johnny Carey cus i cant remember no one else

also no one talk about the spelling mistakes in this it’s late and i dont wanna spell check rn

Coming in on Number Ten its

10 - Harry Pinero

his hairlines reached the base of his skull at this point and he’s just never really been my fav guest so he gets last place unfortunately 😕😕 i think this is only bcus he violates my faves and I stand up against bullying thank you very much

9 - Yung Filly

ok yall gonna get mad at me for this one but he’s very bf material i cant lie just not very attractive for me? There’s some vids and photos where he’s like FINNEEE but then most of the time he’s mad funny and cute just not that attractive ya know and he looks like he’s 4’3”, like I KNOW he’s taller but he dresses and the way he moves idk he moves short af

8 - AnesonGib

ok so I had him 6th originally but I acc looked at pics of him and changed my mind, I have not seen a single Gib vid like from his own channel, ive seen gib in the Mafia vid, some old Chunkz vids and ive seen his fights but he’s so FINE and underrated as fuck like?? Appreciate this man?? And he seems mad kind. I <3 Gib. I do not know anything about him tho but I recently saw a vid of Chunkz from like 6 years ago with him in it and Young gib? Mad fine but also he looks almost child entertainer ish so do with that what you will

7 - Chunkz

aight ya ok, my BAD, im SORRY but like he’s just not it for me, he’s leng i wont lie but like he’s so authoritative and i cant with that ya know? Like I need a chill man for me im somehow worried this man gonna slap my neck if I talk back and im not tryna get treated like toddler im tryna be your girl? calm ur ass down and we talk

6 - AJ

ok SO I know, I know, im going to get absolutely dragged and maybe even jumped for how low this is but like once again he’s very aggressive and sh and I cnat deal with that, he MAD fine tho he’s so Hahrhdhhfbdnsk but like I rate the others better he is taller then me tho so he can have that

5 - Johnny Carey

YALL SLEEP ON THIS MAN, YALL ARE SNORING AND DROLLING AND EVERYHTING CUS THIS MAN IS SO FINE like I cnat deal with him he’s so fine to me? Like yeah he looks a little wonky and asymmetrical but like? Have you seen the wya he looks at people? Omgmgmmgmg

4 - Kenny

considerably low considering my username but ive developed as a person dont judge me but he mad mad good looking, when he boxes?? 10/10 in a track suit?? 10/10 this entire man is one big SMASH like ❤️

3 - Niko

this man is so cute but also hot its weird to believe he exists like?? I want to climb him like a tree, nuff said and maybe he IS a little lanky but he’s MY sorta lanky (ive always been this way, the nickname for my crush in middle school was lanky tree like taht legit what he called him and looking back he WAS lanky af)

2 - Sharky

Sharky, Sharky, Sharky where do I even start? I think the Sharky girlies on here have said enough for me, he’s hot, he’s cute, he’s nice, he’s funny what more do you even want? And he dresses so NICE and his smile is so SWEET and he’s CARING like omg I might fall in luv and his Hands. Thats it. Look at his hands my Lordy lord.

1 - Darkest Man

my bae, my love, I will defend his bald head for life, Aaliyah has SPOILED me by mentioning how fine he was cus now i cant Stop watching every video ever with him in it, ive watched FootAsylum, his own channel, Chunkz Channel, Sharky’s Channel, even JD sports just to watch him on my screen like he’s so funny I’m cracking up every other second and he looks good doing it too and the faces he makes and HIS HANDS omg dont even get me started heiwkwkskfb I cnat even he’s my no. 1 🫶🫶

Done

ok so taht was my list and now im gonna nominate my mutuals to do this too, you can go for the same guests or choose your own its entirely up to you but I wann see some more opinions so please do it 🫶🫶

Taglist- @b4tasquad @allygatcr @shuuuuush @vctrvn-ls

Sadly that is all my moots, I thought I had more but thats it I guess, I hope yall can find time to do this otherwise its fine 😭🫶

[starglow-xx]

𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘺 ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

(𝘯.) 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘵

the nakajima atsushi collection of “the love of an older brother” series

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ synopsis: he’s had a terrible childhood, and is in no condition to take care of himself much less a newborn, but he’ll do everything it takes to make sure you’ll have the childhood he’s never had

having a baby sister pt. 2 !!

(platonic!) older brother! nakajima atsushi x baby sister! reader

characters: fukuzawa yukichi, edogawa ranpo, yosano akiko, kunikida doppo & dazai osamu | type of work: head canons | pt. 1 | pt. 2 |

a/n : oops i have no excuses

parental guardians time ✧˖*°࿐

atsushi was absolutely done with these people

why the heck did they think that bringing him (who’s obviously the guardian of a month old little girl) to a bombing hostage situation was a good idea

honestly

can’t a guy get a break?

we don’t talk abt it but he started to cry too

but then the bomb didn’t go off?? (ಠ_ಠ)

but then the bomb didn’t go off?? (ಠ_ಠ)

so he was just there on the ground in an awkward position going “h u h” in his head

note that he was still crying and so were you, but not as loud as a few moments ago

when he realized that the bomb wasn’t going to go off, he practically leaped off the bomb and snatched you from dazai’s arms shushing you shakily, trying to calm you and himself down

after you had done so, you cozied back up into your blanket like nothing ever happened

oh the life of a month old baby, how relaxing you must have it

it took a good minute or two to understand what the fuck was happening

the job that dazai-san recommended = job at armed detective agency

the test involved = the ada’s entrance exam

he passed the exam = job at armed detective agency

yeah no he felt like he was gonna pass out (ಠ_ಠ)

fast forwarding to happier times, let’s say that life at the agency was...eventful to say the very least, but luckily there are some very…competent adults to help atsushi out

fukuzawa yukichi ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

#1 cat grandpa

pls you’re now added onto his list of weaknesses

everyone knows it

ranpo’s not a happy camper

...

but he likes you too so you get a free pass ig

one of the best at getting you to settle down only second to atsushi

he’s very calm on the outside, but on the inside at times he’s freakin out a little bit

bc yes he has his crazy stupid lunatic children but a kid this young?

this smol?

yeah no it’s first time too give him a break

so yeah a little awkward at times but he means well and he’s getting the hang of it

atsushi trust scale a solid 12/10

definitely trustworthy to leave you in his care

bonus points bc he knows he won’t get a migraine

edogawa ranpo ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

...

questionable but he’s ranpo-san so he’s reliable to a degree

in life and death situations and supposed to be impossible cases that need solving? 

oh yeah def trusts

but ranpo-san with a...baby?

hm

atsushi is skeptical

but like i said, he likes you so the reliableness factor increases

but actually unbeknownst to atsushi and some other agency members, he does knows the dos and don’ts of what to do when taking care of a baby

he just likes the reactions he gets when doing something he isn’t supposed to

“ah (y/n)! my soon to be protege! lemme take you on a murder case with me!”

“RANPO-SAN SHE’S A BABY???”

“WAIT GET BACK HERE WITH HER STROLLER—”

and actually his favorite victim isn’t your older brother but kunikida

freaking him out is one of the highlights of his day tbh

now he really understands the kick dazai gets whenever he does it

one time he tried to give you a lollipop but kunikida who wasn’t even in the room burst out of the president’s office and started screaming abt danger and choking hazards

atsushi trust scale 7/10

not bad with all the obvious/technical stuff but he gives him heart attacks on purpose so yeah

bonus!

kunikida trust scale 2/10

bad but can’t be worse than dazai

yosano akiko ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

she scares atsushi but said scary lady is the closest thing to a maternal figure you’re gonna get

for atsushi, yosano has more of a scary big sister vibe but since you’re nearly two decades younger than him, he’s sure that when you get older you’ll probably see her like a mother

if you’re not with atsushi then you’re in her office

usually napping tbh

bc yk, you’re a baby so there isn’t much you can do at the moment

she talks to you while working and just doing other mundane tasks in her office

one time atsushi and tanizaki overheard and all tanizaki could do was pat atsushi on the back in sympathy

“...and this is a scalpel! it comes in handy for a lot of these operations, though i prefer other things like chainsaws and the like”

*cue giggles*

*cue atsushi fainting*

you don’t really have much hair yet but she’s been eyeing some cute butterfly clips to match the one in her hair for when you can wear them

atsushi trust scale 8/10

also pretty good at taking care of you but loses points trying to teach you about chainsaws

kunikida doppo ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

...

hmm

where to start

he’s competent but he’s awkward

will give yosano-sensei a run for her money as your maternal figure bc boy is the mother henning bad

“DAZAI! don’t you get another step closer!”

“but kunikida-kun! i need to get my headphones!”

“i can’t have you infecting her with your...you!”

“kunikida-kun she’s in atsushi-kun’s arms like 10 feet away!”

“and you’re about to be 10 feet too close!”

but like i said

he’s awkward

“here kunikida-kun! hold (n/n)-chan for a minute would you? yay! bye!”

“wAIT DAZAI YOU—...”

“...hm? what’s wrong kunikida-kun? you look awfully stiff there.”

“...”

“...kunikida-kun?~ gasp! are you...nervous? (¬‿¬ )“

“dazai if i could yell at you right now i would but for the sake of everything holy and otherwise, i can’t believe im saying this but get the baby out of my arms and take her right. now.”

BUT

he’s only awkward if it’s a surprise like the scenario i played out right now

usually though, he’s pretty composed

unless you’re crying

but that’s a different scenario that’ll we’ll get into next time

dreads when ranpo is in the vicinity bc AGH

yeah that’s the best i can describe it

knows he causes chaos on purpose but he can’t ignore it bc what if he’s being serious

atsushi trust scale 9/10

very good but can afford to be a little more relaxed

babies can smell fear

dazai osamu ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

i started laughing when i typed his name if that means anything

besides your brother, he’s your favorite and it absolutely kills kunikida

he cannot for the life of him comprehend how that happened

sobs about it every now and then

“how could we have let this happen?!?”

“ne ne kunikida-kun!~ sounds like you’re just jealoUSACK—”

has “staring contests” with you

by staring contests i mean he just stares at you in your car seat carrier thingy while you shake a rattle

he’s curious okay!

all babies do is eat, poop, cry, play, sleep repeat AND other people pamper you and cater you to your whim

basically his dream life!

also uses you to torture kunikida bc as i said

he’s your favorite (¬‿¬ )

“DAZAI GIVE ME BACK MY WALLET”

“ah ah ah kunikida-kun! you can’t get me if i’m holding (n/n)-chan! what if she gets hurt due to your violent tendencies?! GASP you’re gonna risk that?!”

but like there are times where he’s had enough of you, bc there are times he wants “me time” yk?

BECAUSE

just recently you’ve started crying when you get passed to someone who isn’t him or atsushi

“okay (n/n)-chan! time to go kunikida-kun so your favorite—”

“don’t push it dazai!”

“—can rest his arms!”

this is when he’d pass you on to the blonde and he and said blonde would walk away literally three steps in the opposite direction before freezing

because you’d start blubbering and fussing and without exchanging words kunikida would pass you back to dazai where you a) start to giggle b) settle down and go back to being quiet or c) fall back asleep

tbh tho, he’s kinda impressed

not even he can trigger that face of despair from kunikida

but he fears the day (if it ever comes) when you start crying when you’re given back to atsushi

atsushi trust scale a solid…

5/10

yeah it can go either way

bonus!

kunikida trust scale -2/10

has his reasons but also very petty

realistically, probably around 1-3 depending on the day

pt. 3 w/ the “kids” of the agency next time ⸜( ˙˘˙)⸝

and as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize, repost, or translate on here or any other sites!

tag list : @alfangel13 @linthebinbag @glitch-magic @soba-mija @classisass @moomoo-mochi @missrown @ghosts-and-animals @reginahillary @themonsterinyourcloset @shy-socially-awkward-intovert @eren-jaeger-seijuurou21 @a6r6o6k @summerxdepression @irethepotato​

join the tag list here !!

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[deep-space-lines]

Rating Mass Effect 1 Planets (A Tourist's Guide)

Are they boring? Yeah, kind of. Did I get tired of them really fast during my first playthrough? Yeah, kind of. After 860 hours in the game, am I now spending hours just driving around the boring planets in the Mako, absorbing the vibes, exploring the desolate wasteland, and taking nice screenshots? Perhaps.

Allow me to take you on an autism-fueled guided tour of the galaxy and recommend some wonderful travel destinations for the next time you want to take a relaxing vacation in the mountains. (Because it's always fucking mountains.)

___________

Tuntua: 10/10

I genuinely love Tuntua. This is the planet that I just drove around on for fun during my first playthrough. There's just something about driving over the salt flats and seeing the landscape around you sparkle that fills me with joy. I love the weird inexplicable pyramids. I love how snowy it looks, even if it isn't actually cold. I appreciate a good human-friendly temperature, as I'm sure most tourists will, but I kind of wish it was colder because I want to go ice skating here so, so bad. I can skate pretty fast but I am not good at turning or stopping, which is just what this landscape was made for, baby! I am going to set a new land speed record on these sparkly salt flats in this stupid wonderful brick of a tank.

___________

Asteroid X57: 8/10

I'm kind of torn on this one because I'm not a huge fan of how grey most of the place is, but on the other hand, yeah, that's a solid asteroid. You get what you pay for. Something about the atmosphere (or rather lack of), the looming planet in the background, the multitude of structures in relatively close proximity, make it feel more claustrophobic yet exposed than the other locations you can visit. The northernmost part of the map offers a truly breathtaking view of Terra Nova. Vacation-wise, I think you have two main options. You can lie in the dust and stare up at the sky and ponder your mortality and how small you are in the grand scheme of the universe for as long as your oxygen supply will allow, or you can explore a variety of abandoned structures if that's more your cup of tea. Why are they abandoned? Not relevant to your vacation! It's not trespassing if the owners are dead! ...I think.

___________

Rayingri: 7.5/10

While it seems pretty boring upon first inspection, I think it deserves a pretty high score anyway.

Some of the points are for fascinating rock formations. You've got these extremely steep, strangely pillar-like mountains, plateaus, and cliffs; the terrain is a lot more interesting than most other planets. Maybe not everyone's cup of tea for relaxation, especially considering the earthquakes and all, but I'd love to visit Rayingri with a geologist and just hear them talk about it. How old are these mountains? I wonder if they're really young and their formation was spurred by the tectonic disturbances caused by the looming planetoid that's about to crash into it? Look I dunno how this works, my degree is in astrophysics not geology.

But on the topic of the planetoid... The real draw here, I think, is impermanence. This planet will be obliterated by another planet within a few hundred years. A blink of an eye, on a galactic scale. You might not have the most fun here, but it's a cool place to visit just to say you have- especially if you're a krogan or asari and will live long enough to see it destroyed. There's something profound about that, I think, even if the planet itself is rather boring. Rayingri: experience impending doom today!

Also, my sister wants me to add that orange is a good color. So, bonus half point for good color.

___________

Antibaar: 10/10

I'm gonna be upfront: this place is snowy and cold as balls. If you don't like your vacation spot snowy and cold as balls, you should probably vacation elsewhere. However, I'm a huge fan of snowy wastelands (doing research in Antarctica is at the top of my bucket list), so if you are like me and have a rapturous enjoyment of snow and winter sports, you'll be pleased to learn that Antibaar is just warm enough to enjoy the great outdoors. Bring your sleds, your skis, your skates, we are HAVING A SNOWBALL FIGHT UNDER THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SKY IN THE GAME. Don't let the haters' talk of "low temperatures, high speed surface winds, and low visibility" stop you from having a jolly good time. High speed winds just means your sled will go faster.

___________

Casban: 3/10

I'm going to be real with you: unless your vacation goal is to isolate yourself like a monk and wreak havoc upon future generations of algae, any experience you can have on Casban, you can experience better on Earth, with the added bonus of vacationing on Earth not being illegal. Don't get me wrong, it's a stunning planet- it's just that I don't particularly enjoy sitting in the lush grass, watching a beautiful sunset, and thinking about how nice it would be if the air was breathable and I could have a picnic here. Not that I've ever done that, of course. That would be illegal.

However, if you're a rogue ecologist with no moral qualms about disturbing a delicate ecosystem, this would probably be a really cool place to hang out and do some illegal rogue ecologist research. I won't stop you, I'm not a cop.

___________

Maji: 4/10

Maji is, I think, mostly just a place to stop for a cool selfie. The sky is beautiful, but I mean, there's really only so long you can stare into the suns before you either get bored or sustain eye damage- and if you do want to look at the binary, you'll probably get a better view from space anyway. Given all this, I'd rate the planet a 3/10; however, I'm tacking on an extra point for excitement. Terminus pirates sometimes dump people here and make them fight to the death to be rescued, so if you enjoy blood sports, this may just be the perfect vacation spot for you.

___________

Solcrum: 10/10

If you want to feel like you're back in the early days of human space travel, when everything was new and alien and deadly, when we thought we were alone in the galaxy, when other planets were dreary and uninhabitable yet fascinating wastelands- Solcrum might be just the place for you. The roiling behemoth of a star looming over the horizon like some kind of eye and casting eerie blue light over a fragmented barren landscape... Solcrum is another good place to feel small. With the mass relays making travel across the galaxy near-instantaneous, it can be easy to forget that most of the Milk Way is vast, unexplored, empty, and impersonally hostile to life. Solcrum is a humbling reminder of that reality. You're going to want to bring your SPF 3000 sunscreen and a lot of cold water, because this moon sits at a balmy 351 °C. It isn't an easy vacation spot- but then, you're not vacationing to Solcrum because it's easy.

___________

Agebinium: 9/10

This was actually the last planet I visited, but it felt right to place it here, as the renegade to Solcrum's paragon. Blue giant, red giant. I love a planet with some mood lighting, and the mood here is a little bit evil in a sexy way. I'm into it. I'm putting it a point below Solcrum because Solcrum just has this memorable eerie dark vibe that Agebinium doesn't quite replicate, but in terms of atmosphere, it's up there. It's a bit colder, a bit flatter and easier to drive around, and kind of reminds me of a forlorn desert. An evil desert. In a good way. It's not really a place you go to do things as much as a place you go to be there, you know? Like the woods or something. I don't really go into the woods to do things, I go into the woods to be in the woods. Look, something about the vibe here just makes me want to be evil and sexy while doing it. I don't need to explain myself to you.

___________

Edolus: 1/10

Honestly, there's just not enough on Edolus to justify the risk of visiting. As you can see above, meteor impacts are disturbingly frequent, and I don't know if just another windy desert is worth the risk of being instantly snuffed from existence by a loose boulder. On the bright side, they might name the crater after you.

___________

Sharjila: 4/10

To start with the positives: Sharjila is one of a handful of explorable worlds with higher animal life, and the only visitable world we know of that supports silicon-based life! Sick! And I can guess what you're thinking; wow, silicon-based life sounds cool! Would love to see some someday! Unfortunately, the silicon animals are elusive, and I've never been able to glimpse them for myself. Even if you did come across wildlife, you probably won't be able to leave your vehicle for a closer look, as the high atmospheric pressure is deadly to everyone who isn't a volus.

The main drawback to this world, however: it's full of ammonia and sulfur. Assuming you can get your hands on the equipment necessary for a visit, your stuff is going to smell like total ass for weeks.

___________

Eletania: 9/10

Animal life, lush meadows, beautiful landscapes, a delicate ring system AND a moon, stunning skies- Eletania has it all. Which is unfortunate, because it wants to kill you so bad. It would be an easy 10/10 if the local microscopic critters would just chill the fuck out, but NO, I have to sit in my tank and gaze wistfully at the beautiful scenery and think about how much I want to frolic out there.

Look at that view. Don't you want to take a hike here? Don't you want to climb to the top of one of those mountains and have a romantic starlit picnic under the rings? Don't you want to just roll around in the grass for a bit? Imagine playing fetch with your dog here. It would be nice, right? Well you CAN'T, at least not for very long, because then you and your dog would both be DEAD. You gotta stay in your car and play safari while you watch the pyjaks roam around aimlessly in your place. Undignified. Why do THEY get to be free and I, the clearly superior ape, have to sit in the Mako like I'm in time-out?!-- Anyway, it's a nice planet.

___________

Mavigon: 7/10

"Let me guess, you like the-" YEAH I LIKE THE FROZEN WASTELAND PLANET!!! AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT MAKE YOUR OWN POST!

Some points taken off for having less general whimsy than Tuntua and Antibaar, and for the fact that the great outdoors cannot be enjoyed by virtue of the planet being negative 8 billion degrees. But like. I wanna look outside the window and see that howling storm while I sit nice and cozy by a fireplace, bundled up in a sweater and a blanket, drinking hot chamomile tea. Either that, or I want to sit in my tank and watch the snow and listen to melancholy music. NOT sad music by the way. It NEEDS to be melancholy. This is a planet that will give you seasonal depression.

My favorite part is just at the edge of the map though (see above screenshot), where the mountains disappear completely and give way to a flat plain that stretches out as far as the eye can see. Makes me wonder if the whole area is covered by an ice sheet and the mountains we see are just the very tips of a massive mountain range buried beneath kilometers of ammonia ice. Cool and spooky. I think if I had to pick a planet to die on, this one would be up there. Very atmospheric.

___________

Trebin: 0/10

I wish I had something nice to say about Trebin. I really don't. I don't have anything all that terrible to say about it either- which is kind of worse. This is a planet defined by what it lacks. Water. Life. Redeeming qualities. There are more dangerous places you can visit, but at least danger is its own kind of excitement. Trebin is just... eh.

You may be wondering why it is that I praise some planets for being empty and desolate, while condemning others. This is based purely off the vibes that I can objectively sense with my giant brain. I hope this answers your questions.

___________

Klensal: 8/10

I was going to give this one a 7/10 like Mavigon until I realized the entire map seems to be covered distinctly with glaciers, rather than snow. There's ripples where you can see the ice has been flowing, and valley glaciers flowing between the mountain peaks. I helped out with a little bit of glaciology research in undergrad and this tiny aspect of a planet sparked joy for me ok? The way the ice flows just feels so natural! Maybe it's on Antibaar too and I was too distracted by the beautiful sky to notice? But the other ice worlds I've seen so far are kinda just. White and snowy. But on Klensal the surface is tinted blue and looks almost iridescent. The whole landscape is awash with pastel blues and purples and greens as you drive, it looks more like blue glacial ice rather than a thin layer of snow over rocks. There's just a bunch of teeny tiny details that come together to make a subtly awesome planet.

___________

Presop: 1/10

So y'know how I mentioned Solcrum feeling like the early days of space travel? This is like that but without the glamor. The fact that you can actually see the stars and that it reminds me of Luna gives it a marginal point over Trebin, but there's just no tourist attractions here. If you're stopping at Presop, it's gonna be less for tourism and more like stopping at a gas station to use the bathroom on a long road trip.

___________

Amaranthine: 1/10

So... Amaranthine is not a particularly fun place to visit. However, my main gripe with this "tourist destination" is that it is advertised as purple. "Under the dim light of the red dwarf Fortuna, the surface of this world is lit in rich twilight blues and purples even at midday"- is what the brochure said. It was named after this supposed purple-ness. Amaranthine is supposed to be a purplish-red color, right?

Now look at my photo. I know that lighting can sometimes look different in photos vs real life, and you may be tricked into thinking the same thing I did, that surely it must look better in person. It does not. Allow me to personally assure you that this thing is blue and gray. Blue and gray are fine colors, but the important point here is that they are not reddish-purple. Needless to say, I was a little disappointed when I landed down here. Surely we could've saved a pretty name like that for a purpler planet? I'm actually trying to get in contact with the International Astronomical Union, see if I can propose a name change to something more appropriate. Cobalt? Indigo? Sapphire? Iris?

However, I'm going to give it a single point for a rather befuddling atmosphere. For some reason it reminds me of how alien planets in Star Trek TOS just looked like a bunch of fake rocks with an unnaturally colored sky in the background? Good planet to dissociate on.

___________

Xawin: 3/10

I feel like I'm betraying some personal principle by saying this, but... I'm getting a little tired of snowy wastelands. I forgot how many there are. How many planets. I have 10 more to go. I should've counted them before I started tbh. I'm running out of unique ways to get excited about the cold.

Xawin. It's cold and snowy. Not in an unrestrained winter fun way, but in a way that kills you. You want an average surface temperature of 140 Kelvin? We got it. You want ice storms? We got it. And that's about it. This world just makes me think about how Antarctic researchers supposedly get so bored that they just fuck all the time. If I were a mercenary hanging out on this rock, I'd probably do the same, and I'm asexual.

+10 points for snowiness. -7 points for being boring.

___________

Ontarom: 10/10

FINALLY A FUCKING PLANET I CAN HAVE A PICNIC ON!!!! We got everything we need. Breathable atmosphere. Livable temperature. Soft grass-equivalent. Docile space cows that you can pet, or that can provide a nice cow steak if you forgot to bring picnic food. Space beetles big enough to ride on, not that I condone or recommend it.

It's not all sunshine and rainbows- in fact it is very stormy almost all the time- but joke's on you, I'm a slut for a good thunderstorm. The terrain is shit. Getting up to the plateaus is quite a hike. It's hot as balls. But I can have a picnic. I wanna take my girlfriend on a date here so bad.

My only concern is that I seem to have lost all my credits?

___________

Chasca: 8/10

Chasca is basically Ontarom minus the beetles. 30C is a bit hot for my taste, but compared to the other planets we've seen so far, it's extremely comfortable for humans. There's some really cool pyramids for any archaeology enthusiasts!

The terrain is a bit rougher than Ontarom, perhaps a better hiking destination than a picnic one, which is great because I LOVE a good hike. There's these valleys that are basically just perfect paths through the landscape, and if you're lucky you might run into some space cows here. I wonder how aliens feel about the human habit of naming everything 'Space _'? I mean, space cows, space beetles, space hamsters... come on guys, we're better than this...

___________

Nodacrux: 4/10

This is just Chasca but it kills you. Chasca is right there. It's right next door. Just go to Chasca.

___________

Altahe: 8/10

YEAAAAA!! Look at this place. It feels like an evil wizard should live here. Or a dragon. Or a space vampire. This feels like the setting of a sci-fi horror movie. Every aspect of this planet LOOMS. Like what ARE those mountains? They look more like hydrothermal vents than mountains.

The fact that it's a double planet is incredibly cool. I did a bit of lazy digging (which is frustrating when most of the 'literature' on the subject seems to be one admittedly cool-sounding sci-fi book from 1982 (Rocheworld by Robert Forward) and a few reddit posts), and it seems like a system of two planets orbiting so close that they share an atmosphere without breaking apart falls under the umbrella of 'sort of kind of barely physically possible maybe?' Like theoretically it checks out, it sounds possible for there to be a window where the tidal forces are enough to rip the atmospheres away before the actual rocky parts fall apart, but how narrow is that window? Sadly I don't know, and I'm not quiiiite confident enough in my physics knowledge to do that kind of math, and it's going to bother me for the next 2 weeks to 12 years of my life.

So if either spooky landscapes or witnessing the laws of physics doing something really weird sounds like your kind of thing, this planet might be up your alley.

___________

Nepmos: 6/10

Is it safe? No. Is it beautiful? For the most part, not really. If you've ever looked at an active volcano and thought, 'wow, I wish I was there!', Nepmos might be the place for you. (The fact that I have thought that is why it scores as high as it does.)

The sky is absolutely stunning. Cool volcanic rock, you can see the flow of lava and some places where you can see the rock is only a thin layer with magma flowing just beneath the surface. Explore at your own risk; assuming you don't lose a limb to stepping in some rock soup, your friends will think you're either an idiot or a total badass.

___________

Binthu: 0/10

I'll just save myself the trouble and quote the travel brochure here: "Data about the world is surprisingly brief and generic, painting a picture of an unpleasant and uninteresting place." Sadly for this vomit-colored world, we are after pleasant and/or interesting.

___________

Nepheron: 9/10

I forgot this one existed, probably because I usually only come across it relatively late into a playthrough, which is a damn shame because it's really cool. The mountains sparkle. Bitch the mountains sparkle! And there's salt flats! It's like Tuntua but with cooler mountains and a complimentary color scheme, which I'm a big fan of. The only thing separating Nepheron and Tuntua by a point is personal preference, honestly- I like the brighter atmosphere of Tuntua- and the fact that it's a bit difficult to drive around, with much less opportunity to enjoy setting land speed records on salt flats. The travel brochures weren't kidding about geological beauty though. If I had a geologist with me to talk about the cool mountain ranges (and they are quite cool- most planets seem to have hills or disconnected mountains, but the landscape here is very much mountain ranges) I would probably have a really fun time here.

___________

Aaaand that's it ladies and gentlemen. This took me like? 4 days? Ish? I had to do Noveria, Feros, and some of the Cerberus side quests in order to unlock all the planets (except Chohe or Nonuel, the ones you get once you get a certain paragon/renegade score, I'm just too lazy), and speedrunning the main missions to get to the boring side quest planets was certainly a unique experience. Not one I'd recommend. I DIDN'T EVEN TALK TO GARRUS. It was weird. But fun! The apocalypse can wait. We were busy sightseeing, bitch!

[applestorms]

GOOD OMENS.

CLENCH UP BITCHES WE'RE DOING THIS. SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS READ WITH CAUTION my hands are still shaking from finishing season 2 approximately 13.420 minutes ago so everybody clam the fuigk up/down. we're getting IN to this one. 10 sections.

okay, before i get into anything specific, i just wanna say: this series has had some of the best writing i've seen in a tv show & it's really fucking gratifying to watch. this season in particular had some really clear, distinct themes that were evolved upon and executed pretty much perfectly imo, to the point that i almost feel like i can guess what a good deal of season 3 is probably gonna look like (see section 12). this is great!! it means the writers are really paying attention to what the story is doing & what the characters are feeling/going through at any given moment in the story, & it just makes the series that much stronger on a rewatch. this season in particular really hits that sweet spot for me of being overt & clear w/ its themes w/o treating its audiences like idiots, it just. works.

i'm not going to touch on season 1 as much here since it's not as fresh as s2 for me rn, but hopefully this post can help bring some additional analysis/reflection to the new season. not sure how much of this will be totally crazy wild & new, but perhaps some interesting points will come outta the process. hope you enjoy the read!! there's 13 sections so feel free to skip around.

1. aziraphale as the beautiful execution of a flawed protagonist (ft. crowley's pining)

one of the best parts of this season by far comes from the character writing, particularly for the main two & especially for aziraphale. aziraphale was my personal favorite to watch for this entire season actually, he & crowley are both such a fucking mess but aziraphale in particular hides it in such a fascinating way to me. it's not just like watching a car crash, it's like sitting on a park bench watching a man drive a bus into a stoplight, like full on crunch the vehicle in half squish, and then just get out & carry on walking like nothing is wrong & he isn't dripping blood & scraping broken bones across the concrete.

on a broader scale, there is something incredibly appealing about how aziraphale & crowley are presented, even at a very base level. even w/o the fantastic acting of michael sheen & david tennant specifically, it's a pretty common thing that fandom will default to shipping Narrative Foils, & these two are the epitome of that. a demon who can't stop being a nice guy & an angel who keeps cutely being an asshole- this is a great base to work off of, & again the execution thus far has been excellent.

what i like about aziraphale in particular is how complex his character ends up being while still fitting into a very particular role. while crowley to some degree fits into an already pretty popular & well-loved character model (that of the grumpy nice guy), aziraphale has to hit a couple of very important & precise traits, being both outwardly very likeable & endearing while simultaneously constantly fucking up & doing increasingly egregious shit. i really can't commend michael sheen enough for his acting in helping to get the balance right- it would be STUPIDLY easy to make aziraphale the most obnoxious character to ever grace the screen if performed or written incorrectly, the kind of outwardly-kind asshole that does horrific shit w/o reflecting since the show runners seem incapable of seeing the character for what they are & it all just ends up driving viewers up the wall (e.g. emily in paris).

what i think makes aziraphale work is the fact that he is just genuine enough in his actions that when he does something legitimately horrible, it's both so subtle you almost don't even pick up on it, too distracted by the emotions you feel in following his perspective, & just motivated enough that it's easy to write him off w/o thinking any deeper. as much as crowley calls aziraphale out for being a bad magician, i think it's spot on that the one thing he is quite skilled at is misdirection. you spend a lot of time in this show following very closely with either aziraphale or crowley's POV, but in s2 especially the contrast between those two views is quite overt. while crowley's perspective is often a lot quieter, more reflective & also overtly anxious as he throws himself into stressful situations purely for the sake of supporting az, aziraphale's POV is always very loud & chaotic as he runs around, finding pubs & fighting demons & doing whatever the fuck else he wants to at any given moment.

the main flaw of aziraphale in this season is, imo, selfishness, a direct contrast to crowley's continual self-sacrifice when it comes to aziraphale. in both cases though, this is (pushed to become) a flaw that i think ultimately leads to their inability to connect at the end of the season. but in order to understand that more, we're going to have to take a closer look into the circumstances that have thus far shaped both aziraphale & crowley's characters.

2. denial as a defense mechanism: heaven & hell as life threatening danger

if there's one thing s2 has not forgotten when it comes to a&c, it's the circumstances of s1 that led them to their current emotional/mental states.

slight tangent to lead back into this point: in my work as a librarian, i end up dealing w/ a very particular set of clientele when it comes to the kinds of people that regularly use a public library. parents w/ young children, older gentlemen & ladies looking to escape the more extreme weather, and (for my city, at least) lots and lots of people who no longer have stable housing. since an often forgotten about goal of a public library (well, to the general population) is social services, as a part of my training i've recently been working through a book on what is essentially trauma-informed customer service, which has led to a lot of insight.

one point in particular that i want to highlight here is the idea that traumatic instances are both common & intensely significant in how they can change a person's behavior. defense mechanisms that may make sense in the context of a traumatic event will often stick w/ people even as the context they're in changes & the instincts are no longer useful, instead making the individuals' life even more difficult.

if there is one trauma that defines a lot of the current problems that a&c are going through, it's the fear that originates from the constant surveillance and, in turn, threat of complete eradication that comes from both heaven & hell.

significantly, crowley & aziraphale both respond to this threat in distinctly different ways: where crowley clings to the idea of escape, of creating a place where it's him and aziraphale against the world (alpha centauri), in part idealizing aziraphale as both his only friend ("friend") & the only person he could ever truly trust (crowley also likely has some trauma from the fall but we'll get to that), aziraphale viciously denies that they even have a relationship, all the while simultaneously relying on crowley heavily to do a lot of his dirty work for him. (see this post for the endgame twist on that idea.) it's significant to me that a good chunk of aziraphale's earliest morally dubious actions involve lying- since he's been doing it for so long, it's probably one of the easiest things for him to write off as not that bad, so it's natural that he would default to it as a defense mechanism here too.

to clarify, crowley does engage in denial too, though it's obvious from the emotional climaxes of both season 1 & 2 that he is much less committed to it, likely doing it for the sake of easing aziraphale's mind and/or giving himself something to fall back on so he doesn't attract too much attention from the people that can really hurt them. overall though, these are both basically just fight/flight responses- crowley ultimately wants to run away from or fight everyone that can hurt them (& betrayed him by letting him down in the past) and aziraphale ultimately just wants to deny that the problem even exists.

if we see aziraphale's later stated goal of, "Let's change heaven for the better," as an evolution off of his earlier mindset, this is also basically what their final argument in ep6 comes down to: crowley wanting to run away and aziraphale wanting to go & fight for change. what's so aggravating about this conversation is that they also want the exact same thing: EACH OTHER. (idiots.) (maggie & nina were spot on, of course. it's not just nightingales missing in that silence.) this is not even to mention the fact that they are utilizing these defense mechanisms not just in an attempt to protect themselves, but ultimately to protect one another. think about that one late at night if you wanna get up the motivation to key mr. gaiman's car.

it's also interesting to note that in s1 crowley basically wins this argument, getting the chance to settle down (albeit, still under pretty questionable circumstances) as he & aziraphale (supposedly) create their own little corner of the world away from everyone else. it still doesn't work though as neither of their solutions really get at the core of the problem, which is 1. the horrific bureaucratic systems of heaven & hell that Don't Give a Shit about People at all, and 2. their own unspoken fears & feelings (romantic & otherwise).

3. good, evil, & narrative foils: crowley edition

since i extrapolated on aziraphale's character in section 1 and a&c's relationship in 2, i think it's only right that i look into crowley more for 3.

for all the pain & agony & tears that it brings, i really do think that ep6 is the best ep of s2. specifically, i think that ep6 is the one that shows the primary issues of a&c that have been plaguing them throughout the season (& even previously in s1) the most overtly, and this is especially true of crowley.

there are two things that aziraphale gets wrong about heaven in their final argument: 1st, the idea that heaven is necessarily better than hell, & 2nd the idea that crowley would ever want anything to do w/ it again.

i've seen some people talking about crowley like he's the voice of reason this season, but i don't necessarily agree, or at least not entirely. he's completely right when he says that heaven & hell is toxic in their final argument, yes, but i don't think his motivation in saying that is purely from observation either. remember that point i mentioned earlier, about crowley also having trauma from his initial fall? where aziraphale naturally trusts people to a fault (see: gabriel, but also picking up shax, the graveyard, etc.), crowley is plagued by a complete inability to trust anyone around him, & it's my opinion that a lot of this comes from the trauma of his initial fall.

the one exception to this is, of course, aziraphale, who we can see attempting to be a friend to crowley both before & long after his fall, but aside from him crowley Does Not trust anyone else around him & honestly for good reason. while we can write off hell as just being Like That, even if crowley didn't initially want to fall (as is heavily implied in a few flashback scenes), he certainly doesn't want to be dragged back into a supposedly great position that he knows he could lose again at any wrong comment. this is also (in part) why i think crowley reacts so strongly to aziraphale's "Nothing lasts forever," comment- after going through the horror of losing his divinity & all the stress of the last few seasons, the one thing crowley probably wants is stability, & he's been relying on aziraphale as the source of that. you're both doing the dance for this one, boys.

to reiterate: don't forget the graveyard scene when it comes to crowley doing absolutely anything for aziraphale to the point that it hurts him, both in terms of the supposed punishment he got from hell (that az skips over real fast in his narration) & how aziraphale continues to deny both the reality of their relationship & how much his denial hurts crowley.

4. beelz & gabe the weirdest couple imaginable. good for them. good for them. also: heaven & hell as two equally controlling/toxic sides of a bureaucracy

the Big Bads of the last few seasons took more of a backseat for this one which makes sense considering the focus on a&c and all of the parallel couples, but i do think the one point that was emphasized for them is very important, and that's the ways in which both heaven & hell parallel each other as shitty bureaucratic pyramids of power.

if we consider this meme to be true, i think crowley really is right when it comes to his analysis of heaven & hell, though we're probably just gonna have to wait until s3 to see the exact route the show decides to take.

a big running thread w/in either of these two groups is the fight for promotions, both in terms of people clawing their way up to get more power & in terms of people being replaceable. crowley & gabriel getting kicked out of their positions is just a vacancy of power to the companies that are Good Omens Heaven & Hell, and there is a very clear parallel between shax & michael & their desire for control. what's notable is how that parallel might also now extend to aziraphale what w/ his new promotion. all very fitting concepts to cover in a post-covid, writers-strike context, which i have seen our resident mr. gaiman posting about.

5. yuri on ice, hannibal, & the beauty of acknowledged romantic tension

if there is ONE thing i am disgustingly grateful for in this show it's the fact that we finally have some concrete follow-through on the romantic tension between a&c that permeated through s1. there's only so many times a man can call his best bud "Angel" completely unironically before it gets fucking stupid (cough cough dean winchester cough). but also, to put it in the words of another text post around here: I love how the kiss was awful.

even if there wasn't a kiss, the fact that this fucking entire season fucking revolved around love & featured all kinds of parallel couples should be enough to clue you in on the romantic tension between a&c, if you somehow were blind enough to miss it before. that being said, i'm really glad that the kiss was executed the way that it was, essentially summarizing all of the tension & anguish that had been built up over the last few seasons in an explosion. the state of aziraphale & crowley's relationship hurts more because they kissed, because the tension finally overflowed & it still wasn't enough to stop him from getting in the stupid elevator & running away again.

sorry had to take a break to aggressively listen to the better call saul theme song again. anyways, while i know there are some other shows that have set precedent for this in acknowledging the romantic development between their leads, i can't stop thinking about two in particular in comparison to good omens: yuri on ice, for the literal cinematic parallels between the kiss, and nbc hannibal, for the creator acknowledgement & slow lead up to the climax.

what i am desperately hoping & praying for w/ good omens is season 3, since it feels like all too often when we finally get a good, Gay:tm: show it's always this big, flashy thing right at the end that everyone freaks out about & adores (around these parts, at least) but is never evolved upon. i think gomens has a good chance since we've got more precedent now, the creators/actors/etc are more open about it, & the season is clearly unfinished w/ a ravenous fanbase, but something something supernatural trauma i'll trust it when i see it. can't always believe these corporate fuckers. at the very least though they probably wouldn't write this kind of ending if they didn't think they had a good case for another season, so.

ok, a couple shorter sections cause i'm undoubtedly gonna run out of space if i keep at this pace:

6. the resurrectionists was a really good arc that i enjoyed a lot

exactly what it says tbh, the writing for this arc in particular really stood out to me.

i mentioned earlier that s2 has some really good character writing & i think that's in part because it's necessary as a kind of transition season, reflecting on the chaos that happened w/ the first go at armageddon & setting up for the next apocalyptic event that is likely planned for s3. it's for this reason that i think the resurrectionists arc is really strong, establishing in particular all the flaws of aziraphale's character that i went over previously in a very interesting way that still manages to weave into the previously established, albeit quite sparse flashback timeline established in s1. the morally dubious nature of grave robbing for the sake of science & medicine is the perfect context to put characters like a&c in, and the more overt look into class w/ a character like elspeth works really well in helping to ground the more abstract social commentary associated w/ heaven & hell.

7. ramblings about sequels & whatnot

it can be really difficult to write a sequel, especially when the first go at the story cleaned up its plot so well by the end, but where s2 is strongest imo is in establishing the ways that crowley & aziraphale still need to grow.

i almost think that this season had to end horrifically tragic, in a similar way that i think book 2 of the simon snow series wayward son had to end on a pretty dour note. in order for 1 & 3 to have decently high notes, 2 just often has to be pretty miserable to balance it all out.

this is also why i think the maggie/nina storyline is so important overall. not only do those two establish the most overt romantic parallel to a&c, helping to transition the story from s1 & set up for ep6, but they also end on a distinctly hopeful note that's in direct contrast to the scene that comes immediately after they leave. the parallel plants at least the tiniest seed of hope that a&c can sort their shit out if given some time & communication, similar to maggie & nina. it also makes a lot more sense in establishing why crowley chooses that moment of all times to bother w/ a love confession- i genuinely don't think the kiss would work if m&n didn't have a little sit-down intervention w/ him beforehand.

8. SPECULATION: aziraphale vs. crowley apocalyptic fight, dissolving of the current organization of heaven & hell, affirmation of the beauty of humanity & morality?

a list of my speculation about what may or may not happen in s3:

apocalypse part 2 only this time aziraphale & crowley are actually gonna be fighting each other & it's going to be fucking agonizing to watch especially in direct contrast to s1

there's probably going to be some sort of attempt to get crowley into an equal/parallel position to aziraphale in hell. whether or not he actually decides to take this position is kinda up in the air, but either way he's going to fight it at first out of a hatred of both sides. if he does eventually agree it'll be under some sort of condition to save aziraphale, and/or a fake out trick that also is to save aziraphale.

i just don't think i can see a happy ending where heaven & hell stay in their same structure. w/ such big characters as gabriel & beelzebub just fucking gone into the middle of nowhere there's gotta be some kind of re-establishment of the two sides & their relations. the only way it might not change is if the Religion Lore gets in the way, but w/ the established politics of this show & mr. gaiman i can't see an ending that just allows the status quo to continue on exactly as horrible as it's been.

crowley back in his apartment? (plsplspls.) also something really heart-wrenching & emotional related to the car & the bookstore after a&c have been separated from them because of course. personally requesting additional exploration of the car as a symbol of crowley himself/able to be influenced by aziraphale e.g. scooting towards az, yellow is so pretty, etc. etc.

more flashbacks, maybe more from crowley's pov this time? like something to do w/ that period where he was supposedly being punished for helping aziraphale, more about his experiences w/ hell & the fall, etc.

something something affirmation of the beauty of humanity & the world, ft. a&c bonding over their mutual love of it again. they were each others only real friend for how many thousands of years, if they're gonna be fighting OR attempting a romantic bond that's going to be significant.

when the actual romantic reconciliation happens is kinda up in the air, but it depends on what the Big Bad ends up being, an external force of heaven & hell or a&c themselves. personally, i think that heaven & hell are just gonna keep getting weaker but w/ aziraphale in charge maybe that'll change (or maybe it'll be the catalyst lolol). if it's external they'll probably get together earlier in the season, if it's more internal probably not til the end, though there might be a momentary reconciliation for the sake of fighting something else.

i'm a bit more up in the air about this one, but maybe something more w/ satan & god as the top of the pyramid when it comes to heaven & hell? good omens is all about that kind of contrast so it might make sense. this also assumes that s3 is the presumed end of the series, which may or may not be the case.

if this does end up being the end of the series: i really, really, really, would not be surprised if crowley & aziraphale end up fully human. it's quite the obvious answer but it just makes so much sense for their characters, w/ their love of the world & whatnot. then again a lot of their relationship has also been related to immortality, but also then again there's a lot of stories out there about immortals hating their long lives & wanting to just settle down like normal people so. ehh. oh speaking of settling down,

9. they're NOT married, that's the PROBLEM: thirteen seconds.

thirteen. full. seconds. of the Most Awful Kiss. known to contemporary tv.

they're not married that's th eentire fuckigngggng proble m.,,..,,..,.

10. "I forgive you."

this is such a nonsensical line it makes me so absurdly angry. what the fuck are you doing aziraphale. well, presumably the exact same thing crowley was trying to do by kissing you, but i digress.

bonus edit, i thought of this literal seconds before falling asleep & now i can’t get it out of my mind: crowley needs aziraphale for stability, aziraphale needs stability to have crowley. mic drop

[siliyis]

I am ready to make an enemy out of the communities here. I don't know if this is the most controversial take in tumblr (I doubt it is) but I don't care. Y'all can hate me.

Fandoms don't like female characters. Y'all really don't.

Let me tell you a little story before we jump in. I've made a comment, about a female character, that I don't give a fuck about, and said, if she was male, she would be aggressively shipped with this one male character. I've said it because she looked so hot as a guy (fanart) that I belive the ship would be popular. Mind you, I didn't watch the show. I just know she doesn't like the guy and always banter with him and that's a dynamic shippers eat it up only when it's M/M.

Someone came and said the popular M/M of that show would still be popular if one of the character is female therefore, I'm wrong.

Mind you, I didn't watch the show so I did a quick search on WHEN does the character dies (lmao) and that's all I needed to know to fucking say NO, IT WON'T. It won't be popular if it was a girl.

The ironic part? I'm aware that, statistically, M/M dominate in ships and in so many other areas. But that's not why I said it won't be popular. Rather because female character are NOT relevant in fandoms. They are not! There is no way, a female character, will play a big importance in ONE arc and dies in that same arc.... that would make a fandom sob, cry, hyperventilate the way it did to this fandom! It never WILL! The man dies too quickly. If it was a female, she will not be relevant. Female characters will never make any big impact the way male character do even if they are written the EXACT SAME WAY.

Hell, they can't even making it to the top 10 rankings of favorite character in their OWN series. You usually see 1 female then the rest of the 9 be male. And it's usually a character who is the main female with the rest of the cast. A side male character will always beat the side female character in these shows.

One of the things I've noticed with the way people treat female character is, if she have a crush/love interest and y'all would act like it's the biggest ICK about her character and she suddenly loses all support while simultaneously, thirsting, salivating, over the same character she likes and behave like animals.

I learned, by being in fandoms, that a female character should never show interests in males. That's the only way she can remain in y'all "good favor" otherwise, it's not going to work. Males can do bare minimum and we gonna dkride them so hard.

How many female characters, if they were male, would be MORE liked than they are now? How many male characters, if they were female, would be LESS liked than they are now?

Liking a female character is a fucking BATTLEFIELD while liking male character is the smoothest ride ever (except for Sanji but he doesn't count for obvious reasons).

Having a male character favorite is just easy if dumbasses aren't power scaling. I might find someone who hates my favorites once in a blue moon and all I can think about is, "THANK GOD someone hate him. I thought he doesn't have haters." I can move on from it because he gets an overwhelming love that it doesn't matter if someone dislike him.

The female characters, on the other hand, you need to get the gun ready to start shooting because you will defending her for days. The hate would show up on your FYP out of nowhere, there is a long discussion about why she suck, they are debates, there are people who don't think she is that great, people who undermine her importance to the plot, people talking about, "I don't care about her. Her story arc is not bad, she is just not it. (aka not a male) I just don't feel her, blah blah. I won't be saying this if she was male, blah, blah, blah."

So in conclusion, y'all hate females.

Or to be accurate, they are not relevant for y'all. Fandoms don't care about them.

Let's just acknowledge that and move on with our lives because I don't want to hear shit from someone who likes over 100 male characters but will struggle to pick 10 females they really like. If the number of females don't even make 20% of the amount of males you have liked, don't fake outrage under my post talking about how it's not true. I don't care if y'all don't like them. Just don't lie.

I know you gonna say, there is more male characters than female which is true but if we consider the overall medium, you have OPTIONS. I'm literally saying to not limit it. If you can't name 50 female characters across an ENTIRE medium but can for males? Don't bother arguing with me.

Anyway, it's a real shame to see that female characters aren't written that much in archiveofourown. There are so many female characters that could have made it to the rankings of the 2023... but like I said, female characters aren't relevant so I shouldn't be surprised they struggling to make the list for that too.

Feel free to tag if you think it applies. It doesn't matter if they are from other mediums like Harry Potter, Star Wars or anything like that. If it fits, it fits. I'm going to tag a few random anime fandoms because chances are, it's not your fandom (maybe it is) but I'm still tagging because it's common here.

If I'm loud and wrong then I'm loud and wrong. People hated Jesus for telling the truth.

[megaloldon]

not sure if you're still doing the ask meme but how about one evil ex of your choice?

i'm gonna do gideon because i think he's cute and i am a little gay pest

on a scale of 1-10, how ticklish are they?

solid 10. like a hard 10 dude is going through it

where is their most ticklish spot(s)?

under his arms + like the underside of his biceps are really really bad. like screaming in frequencies only every neighborhood dog in the province can hear. a single angelic note frequencies

which spots are they not ticklish?

n/a and i think he's the first one i'm putting n/a for because i am keen on the idea of fucked up smug assholes also being mad ticklish

what is their laugh like?

really high i could imagine. he's got that Guinea Pig Wheek Giggling

do they enjoy tickling? if yes, is it a fun platonic/familial thing, or kinky thing to them, or can it be both depending on the circumstance?

not really - only with people really close to him & even then, batman could not wrangle that information out of him. at all.

are they more often a lee or ler, generally?

usually neither / uninvolved but he absolutely does not engage in tickling someone first so anyone who manages to get their paws on him doesn't have to worry about retaliation. usually a lee in the rare cases someone CAN get their paws on them

who is someone in their life that they tickle often?

n/a :b (unless we're talking about the anime where he gets more silly with it. in that case julie or lucas)

who is someone in their life that they get tickled by often?

i can see roxie definitely. she gives me vibes where she'd like bump into him or something and he'd make some really un-gideon noise and she'd immediately be like "what was that". HOWEVER if we're talking about the anime i could see maybe lucas or julie

does the word “tickle” or any variation of embarrass them?

not particularly, unless you're directing it at him in some way

are they embarrassed about their ticklishness, and do they try to deny/hide it?

oh for sure. that's another thing you couldn't wring out of him if you tried - not that it's really hard to tell. if you somehow do manage to tickle him he will hound you over and over about Not Telling ANYONE !!!!!!!! EVER !!!!!!! I MEAN IT !!!!! not that you couldn't just like, shut him up by tickling him again lol. get his ass

would gentle tickling or rough tickling affect them more?

all of the above but i think if you're being gentle with him it's way harder for him to like. be distracted from what you're doing

is there a specific spot that they enjoy being tickled, either exclusively or more than other spots? what is it?

he's ok with people tickling his back moreso becuase it does kind of just feel like being petted but he'd never ask for it or admit it. he does kind of still flinch / make silly noises in which case he's going to lie to you and probably insult you if you ask why. he's such a dick man

is there a spot that they can’t stand to be tickled, either because it’s just too sensitive, or it’s uncomfortable/painful/etc? what is it?

he's like a horse don't touch this man's lower body at all lest you get kneed

would they ever purposefully bug a friend/partner/sibling into tickling them, and if so, how would they go about it?

absolutely not he has an image to keep up !!!! (he does kind of think about it sometimes in the anime. he's annoying as fuck to julie sometimes in hopes he gets Got. another one of his many Secrets)

does teasing affect them?

oh badly. absolutely. he will just tell you to shut up over and over but its rly hard to take him seriously when his voice is going up like 10 octaves each time

[noa-ciharu]

Hi

I'm sorry for so many asks but i'm feeling kinda down due to the nintendo 3ds eshop closure... ;-;

So gonna distract myself by asking how each of the tb/x characters would comfort themselves on a bad day (like talking to someone, eating comfort food etc.)

Thanks 👉👈

Oh, idk what that eshop closure thing means but *sends hugs*

Hmmm let's say some mundane daily issues stressed them out and nothing too grand. Ofc 300% serious per usual:

Kamui - goes into full 🥺 mode and waits to be comforted by men. His stress reliever is crying in man's arms or overal physical + emotional comfort. 6/10 on healthy scale and 🌈/10 on gayness one

Sorata - meme it all away. Deals with stress via humor. King. 9/10

Arashi - looks like a type to bottle up. May try some hot tea and meditation so 4/10

Yuzuriha - has no poker face whatsoever, can't keep stiff upper lip to save her life. Will end up bawling her eyes to someone and getting comforted (not in gay 🥺 way like Kamui does tho). Maybe will have Inuki comfort her a bit. Effective overall plus she's 14 so 7/10

Karen - will bottle up and put up a fake smile :< also do some self-deprecating and self sabotaging thing like drug her teammates and go out to fight and die alone :< although her style rocks so 4/10 on common sense scale but 🔥/10 on vibes and sexiness

Aoki - idk rly, guess go to soap lady's hotel room one late at night. To chat with her about protecting kekais duh, ofc no funny business. Happy family man with ounce of common sense yes but can he resist the temptation? 9/10 on he should deal with stress via hooking up with Karen scale

Kotori - cries herself out and gets comforted by her brother or slips into insanity and wants to get crucified no in between. 5/10

Good boy Fuuma - deal with stress by comforting and protecting Kotori and Kamui. Especially Kamui tho, the more touchy feely they are the better Fuuma is feeling. 8/10 on healthy scale since bottling up but 🌈/10 on gayness one

Antichrist Fuuma - I can't possibly state here post will get flagged as explicit. But let's just say it has to do with all kinds of explosions

Subaru - he doesn't deal with stress in any productive way possible, he mops around, smokes it out or sufferes in silence masochistically. That's how 🤕 kinks got as bad as they are, king tried to repress them. Alternatively he deal with stress by wanting to be stabbed. If he dealt with stress by getting railed I would have given him higher rating but this way 1/10 for the masochism and every BDSM-5 mental illness

Yuuto - he fucks it out, no questions. 10/10, Subaru this should be your role model

Kanoe - copes with stress via being sexiest person ever, flirting with absolutely everyone and having sex every day. Also while having them government salary and not doing jack shit beside dreaming in dick throne and having ominous prophecies. Dream coping mechanism 11/10

Hinoto - lies for funsies and makes false false prophecies. She sends seals into death for fun and apperently has a thing for making Kamui's life as hard as it can possibly be. Zero coping mechanism she gave into her dark side but at least we've seen some hinoto-cest pics so for that 2/10

Kusanagi - idk about him rly he seems like most rational one? So something about spilling sorrows to the bartender. Idk let's rate it 7/10

Keiichi - only boy with common sense in this manga he deals with problems resiliently but actually talks about them. 9/10

Nataku - guess they go out and die?? 0/10 on any scale

Kakyou - his coping mechanism is looking pretty and ominous ambiguous prophetic lines. Also I guess eternal pretty boy looks since how does he look the same in TB flashbacks and in X, Kakyou plz reveal me your secret?? 7/10 cuz of L'oreal hair

Satsuki - guess she either does carnage or gets all touchy with Kanoe. Also gets comforted by Yuuto from time to time. Girl has the range and taste so 8/10

Seishirou - god forbid something upsets him cuz he will try all of these, in this order:

Mental gymnastic

Staking Subaru

Manipulate

Mansplain

Manslaughter

Drown himself in cigarettes

"Shit I felt something?? Is this an emotion???"

Plot most manipulative non sensical scheme ever that will somehow turn out to work cuz 😎

Go die

[eldritchsurveys]

1145.

Last Best and Final Survey by foxandforest

Is there anything that you continue to do despite always regretting it/paying for it later? Why won’t you give it up? >> there really isn't anything like that for me and I don't think anything that truly felt awful after doing would be something I continued doing. like, I just don't have the impulse to do things that feel that bad, even if the badness is delayed. this sounds great but unfortunately the aversion applies universally -- so it also applies to having to do things that feel bad the whole time but do have a payoff, like, you know, chores

What was the last “unpopular opinion” you saw that gave you a visceral oppositional reaction? >> this happens to me so regularly that I don't even mark the occasion anymore so I have no idea. like even if I agree with the opinion sometimes my mind will be like "well now I'm gonna argue for the opposite opinion" for no reason except pettiness lol

Do you feel the need to do and see a lot of different things in life—as in having as much of a full and varied life as possible? >> hmm. sometimes, but like... as a reaction to feeling activated. like, when my nervous system is out of whack it just reaches for every possible thing to show me how my life is Bad and Sad and Not Enough, and "you need to Do More" is low-hanging fruit in that regard. but I don't actually believe I need to do and see a bunch of stuff in order to feel fulfilled, I just think that at the moment, I'm not getting the things I do need to feel fulfilled I do enjoy interacting with a lot of different art/media, though, I feel like that enriches my life

What was the last thing you lost your fucking mind over—something so awful or stupid you couldn’t believe it? .

What are some books you’re interested in reading soon? >> eh, idk. the most recent book I added to my tbr is Butcher & Blackbird by Brynne Weaver

What’s an item of clothing you think your wardrobe lacks and would benefit from? >> that's a question I've been asking myself repeatedly especially after having done the wardrobe cleanout (finally). the fact of the matter is I have a hard time actually envisioning what kind of clothes I want (aside from fantastical ass shit that I'd either have to make myself or pay someone oodles of money to make), I just know I definitely do not have enough for my comfort

What is an old person, out-of-touch, things were better in my day, etc. thought you’ve had? >> I had that feeling when Sparrow was telling me about the state of youth literacy these days (good reminder, I meant to do some research about that because what the fuck is going on) (ok I looked it up and this article elaborates more on it while also reassuring me that there's been backlash at least)

What is the worst (i.e., lowest paying, poorly compensated based on intensity of work, etc.) way you’ve ever made money? >> begging the government for pennies so I can avoid starving or freezing to death

Do you have anything going on that could be your signature look, such as always having the same go-to hairstyle or lip color or anything? >> my battle vest is my signature, I think

What is something that you used to put a lot of effort into but not anymore? >> bios/about pages/that sort of thing on social media

If you have children, what are some things you want to make sure they experience or have the chance to experience if they desire? .

On a scale from 1 to 10 how much confidence do you have in your country’s government? When was the last time this number was different? >> I have no confidence in the US government and I don't recall ever feeling otherwise

What is something that a lot of people do that you don’t find the value in? >> a lot of social rituals feel like this for me, like I just don't see the benefit. I don't mean like small talk and shit, I mean like going out to bars and drinking a lot and then feeling like shit the next day but you do it because your friends wanted you to or whatever

Do you ever think about quitting taking surveys? What about just quitting taking them on LJ? >> nah. I mean, I think about it in the abstract, because I've been taking them for literally half my life and that sometimes strikes me as pretty wild, but I know if I haven't gotten bored with the practice by now I probably won't any time soon. I think it would be real neat to be still taking surveys in my 50s, 60s... like, I don't keep diaries well, but I do have these! they serve a similar purpose, I think -- sometimes even better than just open-ended journalling as far as quitting taking them on LJ specifically -- yeah, lol, I was thinkin about that last week in fact. mostly because I am on the fringes community-wise and generally don't get much interaction so there's no real benefit to posting in one place vs another, so I tend to come and go at whim I was gonna just go back to my survey tumblr but I think I'll do the secret third thing and post in both places. I have no actual reasoning for this decision except "fuck it, why not" which is the best reason to do anything

[dratoba]

"The Deadly Nadder Hunt PT 2"

They followed Hunter into the cave. Hunter was following the noise of the small nadder noises. Then they saw it. "wow.." Hunter looked at it in amazement. It was sleeping but still so beautiful. He focused his attention on capturing the creature. "Alright Adrien do you have the net?" Adrien looked for the huge net in his bag. After a bit of digging he found it. "Ah yes here it i-" Then there was a thud. A loud one. When he pulled out the net he dropped a bunch of other stuff.

Unfortunately Nadders have very good hearing and the noise woke it up. They all slowly looked at the creature arising. It roared (???) and brought out its spiked tail. "TAKE COVER" Hunter and the other ran behind rocks to dodge it's spikes. Now the fight began. Hunter used his artificial staff. Darius used his abomination magic. Terra used her plants and Adrien used illustrations to confuse the nadder.

Adrien created fog around it to make it harder to see. They all got hit a few time but not too hard. "Darius!" The Nadder tried hitting him from the back but luckily Hunter warned him. Darius was about to kill the nadder with his scythe but Hunter pushed him. "Wait! Belos wants this thing alive! Don't kill it" "Gah don't do that! I could've killed you" The fight continued. Hunter used his famous magic fist and got into a higher place (The cave is huge btw) He turned his back to help Terra which was a huge mistake.

The Nadder hit him with it's tail which made Hunter go crashing down. A Nadder's strength is crazy. He hit the wall and fell to the floor. Now his head really hurt. He just had to ignore it and continue fighting. But it was hard. He was trying to keep consciousness. "Oh shit. Terra, Adrien keep going just to knock it out" Darius ran to the teen in the floor. "You ok? Hello? Keep your eyes open, Can you hear me?" He was unresponsive. Darius tried shaking him and it helped regain control.

"Yeah..yeah i'm...i'm fine" "good" He helped him up then continued. You may be thinking "It's a Nadder how bad could it be?" Go on boogle (google on the boiling isles) and search "Deadly Nadders" Then you'll understand. It had been about 8 minutes of attacking this thing but it just won't rest. Hunter wasn't at his best since his head just smashed into a huge rock. He tried taking from the air again. The beast actually started to surrender. It threw out its tail spikes. One of them was about to hit Darius. He didn't react quick but Hunter did.

He went to push him out of the way and the spike hit it right under his knee. It didn't go fully through his leg but it did go in a little bit. "Agh fuck!" Why does he always get hurt.."Oh no..ok it's ok try not to focus on the pain" Darius removed his mask so he could breathe better. "Ok on a scale from 1-10 how bad does it hurt?" He grabbed a cloth from bag and a glass bottle of water. "100" It hurt so bad he felt like sobbing. The beast finally went down after being hit in an extremely sensitive part under the chin.

"We got it! Wait what happened" Now Adrien was confused. "It seems the sapling got hit with a spike." Darius got another cloth and shoved it in Hunter's mouth. "I'm not going to lie. This is going to hurt really really bad" He touched the spike and already it caused Hunter a lot of pain. They couldn't imagine how bad this was gonna hurt. Darius placed the cloth on the floor and got the water. With one hand on the spike he looked and Hunter feeling bad then he counted in his head.

PT 3 COMING SOON



[doubleddenden]

Okay. I'm gonna do it. A full review of Scarlet and Violet where I break down everything good and bad I found with it. I'm not gonna hold back on either fronts, so there might be ranting and nitpicking and praise over the dumbest things.

If you disagree just scroll. I'm just a nobody and not worth arguing with. I'm making this, however, because we need real people's thoughts on this game since game reviewers are being paid to give it 8 or 9/10 while millions of players are pointing out the game crashing and game breaking glitches and rating as low as 3/10.

If a random nobody's opinion influences you, read on.

Now, more under the cut, and this may just be my lengthiest review yet:

I'm going to preface this by saying I have been a fan since gen 1, my first pokemon was Cyndaquil in Silver, my favorite game is Black 2, my least favorite game is BDSP, and my favorite pokemon is Corviknight. I loved pretty much every single pokemon game up until the Switch, where LGPE, base SwSh, and BDSP brought the franchise to absolute pathetic, soulless new lows- yet, Isle of Armor, Crown Tundra, and Legends Arceus renewed my love for the franchise.

That should tell you about the type of fan I am. You can trust I know what I'm talking about.

So how do I rate Scarlet and Violet? Basically I'd say that the best game in the franchise is being held back by... well, not being fucking finished. Bugs, glitches, clipping, slow downs- that's just on the programming angle btw. I still have things I dislike about it outside of those aspects.

Basically if it weren't for the glitches and if it were an actually finished game and not an over glorified beta/ desperate attempt to make that holiday cash, I could give it an easy and deserved 8 out of 10. But because of the very preventable errors that came from several companies deciding that the integrity of a game series much beloved by MILLIONS the world over was less important than lining their pockets, I have to give it a 5 until it's fixed.

That being said: I truly do enjoy the game. I really do. I think these truly could gave been my favorite games EVER if they just... just cared a little more.

Let's focus on the positives first:

The new Pokémon this gen are pretty great looking. Something I really disliked about Sword and Shield was that too many of their new Pokémon looked like canceled cartoons (Eiscue), scrapped Sly Cooper characters (Inteleon), non Pokémon like in general (Stonjourner), or just WAY TOO FUCKING HUMAN (Cinderace). Scarlet and Violet has designs that stretch across the board of being cool, cute, animal like, humanoid, and overall it's a very nice mix this go around. Even the humanoid ones look great because theyre just better designed and cool looking, and I can forgive the lack of natural or Pokémon aesthetics as long as it looks good- such as the case of Ceruledge, which looks so amazing to me despite definitely fitting in better in Megaman NT Warrior.

The starters I feel are way better than last gen and are just overall better quality than we've had in a long time- even though I didn't pick it, Skeledirge is the BEST fire starter we've had since Infernape, unless you count Hisuian Typhlosion. They're also way better balanced the likes we haven't seen since gen 4 with secondary types that actually allow them some wiggle room against their "stronger" rivals.

Not to mention the Pokémon have actual textures this go around that help make them look less plastic compared to past games. You'll see it in terms of fur or scales on some Pokémon- it's not perfect mind you, but it's a start! I think my favorite textures though are the Terrastilized textures. I LOVE Terrastilizing my Ceruledge to see that gorgeous red crystal wrap around it's ghostly blue flames.

Terrastilizing is also a pretty neat mechanic that doesn't really do too much besides change a Poke's type. I do miss some of the hyped designs of Megas and some Gmaxes, but we also didn't really need anything as complicated as those either. It works. It's not really my favorite and I'm not really a fan of silly hats, but I do like that it's pretty balanced overall.

Onto other things, let's get into the main draw: open world. Fans kept saying SwSh was open world- one Wild Area and several hallways in a very cramped and forced rail road progression do not make an open world. They said Legends Arceus was open world: a definite improvement, but you were still bound by progression to open sandboxes rather than them being a singular area.

This game is the real deal this time. Sure, levels aren't scaled with the player and you have to progress in the story to unlock certain Koraidon and Miraidon traversal abilities, but it really is a chance to do things how you want without annoying losers like Hop or Team Yell stopping you every 5 minutes to tell you you have to go left. I literally made my way to an area about level 40 to 45 while my team was around level 20 just so I could get items required to evolve my Ceruledge with just 2 badges- and I had more amazing times like this where I stumbled onto areas that were 10 to 15 levels higher than me and gave me thrilling challenges because of it.

An ice type gym leader, Grusha, actually gave me my first defeat in game in several years. Ice type. The glass cannons that go down if a feather touches them. And it was so satisfying to beat him not just by spamming A, but by actually requiring strategy and effective team work.

I encountered and CAUGHT a level 70 Terra Dragonite when I was still level 40 something, and definitely didn't have the badges to control it. But it was rewarding to just let me have a thrill like that! In SwSh, I could be 1 level shy and not be able to catch a Pokémon I can easily defeat because of its stupid system.

I think that the open world could have been done better and made more interesting, but for what it did, it did so, so fucking good. I love being hilariously unprepared for fights- it makes my victory much sweeter! I love being in areas I'm clearly not ready for and discovering weird things- I still am! And I'm in post game! I also love being presented with multiple routes I can take rather than 1 narrow hallway path- I could have gone to the Psychic gym town after getting the proper power ups for Miraidon, OR I could carefully map out and find a detour that let's me go another more accessible way.

It really does give me a sense of freedom I haven't felt from the games ever in my life like this. I sincerely hope that they don't abandon this style of world traversal, because this, I feel, is close to what I've always dreamed my ideal "BotW" Pokémon game would be. Close anyway. There's still leaps and bounds needed before I'm fully satisfied on that front, but it's a good start.

The stories in the game are also really fun and actually have effort put into them- I know I bash on SwSh a lot (and this won't be the last time because it was the last gen), but the fact they NAILED the ending and did not pull whatever tf Rose was up to was such a relief. Sure the gym challenge is pretty standard fair, but the Titan and Star stories were actually pretty neat. I genuinely thought Arven was going to be my least favorite character, but he ended up becoming one of my favorites because his motivations are very pure and understandable, and his background actually made me sympathize with him. I thought Team Star was just going to be another annoying Team Yell, but the fact that it wasn't even an evil team at all and the build up to the boss and reasonings for everything was actually very interesting and well handled- for Pokemon, anyway. And the final story? Suspenseful. I was literally on the edge of my seat. I actually cried a few times throughout Arven's story and the final one too.

And you know what? They somehow made me like an ass kissing weaker starter rival. All they had to do was sprinkle just enough yandere on Nemona to make her just a tad creepy and hilarious, and the dialogue options were GOLD. I even got attached to certain Pokémon like Miraidon, who really is just a large metal motorcycle doggo. It felt amazing watching him regain his strength and courage, and I finally care about a legendary as much as I do Nebby.

The photos of the badges are really fun, and I love that there's something for every type too. Maybe the gym leader was kinda eh, but the photos I have help keep it a memorable experience. The ending one especially had me smiling ear to ear.

As far as other things, I am glad to see they kept the move remember function from LA. It's so much simpler and easier than having to find a guy to do it for you, and that and the nicknames make sense anyway from an adventure stand point.

Another neat feature that isn't explained is the dex rewards. Not just from Jacq, but the pokedex itself will reward you for catching em all with more balls, items, etc. It's incredibly useful and motivating, and gives me a reason to capture all of those 300 Pokémon I already have

Lastly, the music- oh my god the music. Dynamic, diverse, fun! Explosive! Experimenting! I don't think there's a single track I dislike, and I still have Team Star's and the final boss battle stuck on loop in my head. The instruments sound like actual instruments this time and not just DS or 3ds holdover soundfonts like SwSh. Fuck it, I don't even like Ed Sheeran, but the song was still a lovely addition- still unclear how the lyrics fit, but it still sounded nice. Plus there's multiple fun wild pokemon themes.

And now that I've sung high praises... yep, time to absolutely tear the bitch apart. No mercy.

First, let's start with the things a patch will not fix:

Just like SwSh, a lot of things were removed.

Two options- Set and Battle Animations- were removed. I personally play with Set because I don't like having an unfair advantage, and I like the thrill of not knowing what's coming next. You could argue "lol just press B, stupid" but this is exactly the same issue that came with the forced EXP share in SwSh. "Just rotate your team" was the common phrase even by Ohmori, ignoring the bigger complaints- and although the EXP share is now somewhat balanced, I don't see how removing Set will ever benefit anyone, because now I always know what's coming next no matter what. I can't just ignore it either because my eyes do not work that way. Although I don't touch Battle Animations, I know plenty of people that like them off since battles can drag on with them on, and that's no exception here.

Although those are just two things so far, these things are just basic options in the settings menu. Now, most of Pokémon has been using the same system since around XY, with the biggest changes coming from LGPE and SwSh that bake in exp share. Moves are pretty much the same with a few exceptions, which means that the battle system is about the same too.

Why this matters is this: they *purposely* removed these features. This wasn't something just left out by accident, this was literally a purposeful choice. I can't personally see any reason this was done except to give a middle finger to certain people. I mean, SET especially. That's been a setting- not a feature, a SETTING since the gameboy days, and all it does is press B automatically on that front.

Now onto other things, they also removed a bunch of moves, abilities, and forms. Scald is now a signature move just for Volcanion instead of a convenient surf alternative. Greninja, while in the files, still has Battle Bonds, but the Ash Greninja transformation is gone. I really do not understand that because now it means the only games you can use it in are the Alola games. There's more obviously but I'd rather not list a book.

A big change was definitely the removal of actually being able to dress how we want. Disguise it as "lore appropriate" if you want, that doesn't really justify them SEVERELY limiting us to just 4 uniforms. Imo, only 1 looks good, and if you have Scarlet then you're stuck in that ATROCIOUS orange and white color scheme. Legends Arceus may not have had that much in terms of character customization besides period appropriate clothes, but there were options to experiment at the least. I'm just saying, it would have been nice to be able to mix and match and sort of defy dress code a little like Team Star does. Plus... I'm gonna be honest, I need someone to inform game freak that full length pants still exist and most of the world still has them. I hate exposed ankles and preppy shoes. It makes me look like a hipster dweeb.

As far as the rest, the "accessories" are pretty lukewarm tbh. I was expecting "accessories" to be like a hoodie underneath the uniform, some hair accessories, patches for clothes, etc, but it's really just an expanded gloves, shoes, hats, bags, and glasses option, like what SwSh had. Sure there's more on that front, like helmets, but with the four uniforms our options are still HARDLY unique.

I'm not going to forget the "most options we've ever had" for the face and hair, and honestly it still sucks. I found it very hard to find something that didn't outright make me look like a femboy or a small business lesbian. Nothing wrong if that's your vibe, but I prefer a vibe closer to the messy hair and boy options in SwSh. And don't get me wrong, it's great to be able to have all the same options girls do, but inclusion by omission isn't the way to go and more should be done on that front. Let boys wear skirts and short shorts and let girls have full length pants and boy hair cuts, and ffs let us have hair styles that aren't so... samey and plain. More eye options too, because I really do not like how our eyes look so big just to make us look even younger.

Imo the most likely reasons character customization is like this is either a time issue, a "lol its school so lore," issue they purposely set up to do less work, or they really, REALLY want to do away with CC all together and are using this as sort of a "soft" excuse to do it. "Oh, everyone hates it so they must not want it anymore lol" basically.

I have my nitpicks with the character design as well, but this is no longer about "things removed," and will be addressed in my nitpicks.

Now as for other things removed that affect actual gameplay, they removed the Shiny sparkle noise that was introduced in LA and made Shiny hunting much easier. I really don't understand this, especially considering some shinies like Cuphant and Garchomp are very hard to tell if they are shiny or not at a glance. This is doubly hard for Pokemon that are very small and hard to see without squinting. Another middle finger to fans of it? I really can't think of a reason except to artificially inflate the rarity of shinies again, and that's just shitty either way. One could argue that because of two separate teams, LA was the one that thought of it while it didn't come to the SV team- and yet the move relearning and free battle camera are exactly the same as LA. Therefore, there was a conscious decision, like Set, to remove it for reasons that are probably very stupid, dumb, and shouldn't have mattered when the jingle helped to identify one Garchomp from a shiny Garchomp and more.

Something else removed is the ability to just catch without having to initiate battle. Maybe it's just a Legends thing, but I somehow find it tedious to have to initiate battle with every single Pokémon I want to catch now. It's not entirely unforgivable, but it does slog on having to toss, battle, toss, battle instead of having to battle when you're caught.

Lastly, and definitely the biggest thing to me: the removal of the permanent TM. Sword and Shield (if I have to praise that pile of shit ONE MORE FUCKING TIME) at least had permanent TMs AND TRs that function as old 1 use TMs. The TM system they have now, imo, is just tedious. I have absolutely better luck just finding a random TM on the ground or just going by my team's natural moveset than I do actually saving up for these TMs that hardly benefit any of my team. LA had a better system of just being able to purchase the move to be tutored without the bs materials required. Plus just... it's pretty brutal when you think about it. Disgusting in others. Why tf do I need an entire bag pocket dedicated to carrying Shinx fangs, Drowzee fur, Etc? Why am I hitting these poor creatures hard enough to knock out teeth? If anything, I fucking hate that we've regressed from Gen 5's BEST contribution to the franchise. The simpler solution would have been to have TRs of any move you've seen be made into a single use TR for a reduced price OR a permanent TM for a higher price.

Let's move away from things removed. Let's just talk about things that aren't right or that i just don't like or find slightly annoying. We're not hitting bug territory yet.

Wtf is this game's obsession with SANDWICHES??? Sandwich stores, sandwich ingredients, sandwich mini game, your dragon loves sandwiches, your school sells sandwiches, your friends and teachers and NPCs talk about sandwiches so often, even the last photo in the game HAS A SANDWICH STICKER! And the thing is, there are other dishes in the game such as rice balls or ice cream- but MOTHER FUCKING SANDWICHES ARE THE END ALL BE ALL IN PALDEA! EAT SANDWICH! CONSUME SANDWICH! INTAKE THE SANDWICH!

On a mechanics note, I think the food mechanic is okay I guess, but they don't explain that you're selecting ONE SERVING and not just that many pieces of ingredients to put on the sandwich. This ends with a sandwich that's like BRICKS OF BACON BACON BACON CHORRITO BACON HAM HAM HAM BACON CHEESE CHEESE BACON CHEESE BACON. Plus, as my friend pointed out, WHY are we dropping these pieces onto the bread instead of carefully placing them? Why is an ingredient lost to the god damn void if it lands ON OUR PLATE??? Do our pokemon snatch it like untrained dogs? And the bonuses are hardly worth it in the end- least of all for wonky and very low effort animation that sometimes just doesn't work!

Speaking of picnics, I hate that they delegated the breeding mechanics to the picnic. I'm guessing GF is wanting to get away from it because they don't want to admit pokemon fuck or something, but they lay eggs, that's a thing that's been around for over 20 years at this point, and it's time to just accept it. But anyway, what's in the game sucks because of the WAITING. At least with past iterations of Nursuries, I could just ride my bike around and see the NPC make a gesture to tell me my pokemon laid an egg, and if it's taking a while, I could just leave them for a while while I fucked off to do something else for a bit. Here, you gotta make a picnic and wait for that to load, you probably should box your other 4 pokemon so they don't breed by accident (btw you don't just deposit the two you want to breed, you have to make room yourself for it), then you have to WAIT in the very small confines of your picnic table. This is so tedious and BORING. I could have hatched several eggs in the time it took to get ONE egg.

How would I fix this? JUST COPY AND PASTE THE NURSURY! They copied and pasted attacks and stuff, so they can do it. Why do we have to reinvent the god damn wheel? Just slap it in there! OR! Better yet, stream line it to have it delegated to a menu in a special box in the PC. Sort of like a battle box, but just for breeding. You could also go so far as to include incubator space for your eggs so you don't have to rearrange your team every time it's time to hatch. Put a Flame Body pokemon or something in there with it to help them hatch faster or something and to allow multiple, seamless hatches.

Moving on, the day and night cycle. I don't particularly hate the idea of in game days and nights going by faster, but I think it's just inconvenient as of right now. LA once again did it best by having the option to sleep through certain parts of the day so you don't have to wait for nightfall. Oh hey, another pointlessly removed feature.

Now for some nitpicks:

I do not like the camera. It cannot decide where tf it wants to be in battle and zooms way too close while traveling.

This game is in DESPERATE need of voice acting. There's so many cutscenes that are awkward lip flapping and especially towards the end where the gang is just talking- I almost missed some of what they said because I didn't see the text pop up.

I hate how boring most of the gym leaders are here. I was hoping for some shenanigans at least with Iono outside her gym battle but nope

The character art style in 3d particularly is okay but I'd rather us go back to less Detective Pikachu and New Snap and more LA

I don't like how most buildings and shops are just menus now instead of letting us explore little areas

I still hate this inferior trading system. Stop trying to push Pokémon Home on us and bring back in game GTS dammit, you block heads. It wasn't good in LGPE, it wasn't good in SwSh, it wasn't good in BDSP, just give us back the fucking GTS so I can stop asking random people online for help. Trying to find a Quaxly is a nightmare (I am aware of the Austin John codes, that's not a good solution and although I appreciate his efforts, an artificial solution does not work). Everyone is offering Sprigatito for Sprigatito and it's annoying. The surprise Trade is also somehow slower and more tedious.

The main character design overall just feels weird, especially the default boy that looks like someone shoved their shota fetish in. Even then, they describe the academy as a place for all ages, but we're 12? Or something? You'd think this would be the prime of all times to allow us different body types to customize or something. Theres clearly older students as well going as far as grandmas.

The weather is just irritating tbh. Why is it raining in the canyon area constantly? Why does it always rain in the central city during import cutscenes and make the game lag more? Fuck you if you want to use fire types I guess, because it rains every 5 minutes

Some of the "new" Pokémon should just be new forms. Regional variants, Paradox forms- I'm sorry but I don't care that convergent evolution is a thing, that applies to Pokémon like Tauros and Bouffalant or Heracross and Pinser- white Diglett is just white Diglett and the Paradox Donphans are just Donphans. Also, Pawmo is a useless design because it's just Pawmi but slightly taller. Stop padding your dex with bullshit to meet a quota. The designs are cool mind you, implementation is not.

The map design could use work. There's some interesting locations but most are pretty plain looking. Some sprucing up by adding palm trees at beaches, beach goers, some areas with glowing pokemon and lights, flowers- more work needs done in the future.

Gliding does not need a timer. I want to glide for long distances without falling. I really don't understand why this was added because even Braviary didn't have this issue in LA.

Perhaps the biggest nitpick I have that is ultimately of no consequence whatsoever is the choice of ending song. Don't get me wrong, I think Celestial is a decent jingle and I personally have no beef with Ed Sheeran, but what does the song have ANYTHING to do with the game? Was it "written for Pokemon" or did Pokemon just so happen to buy a song that just so happened to be finished but not published at the time? I feel like reception would have been better if it were sung by singers with actual connections to the series, like the anime openings in general, or by well known poketubers or singers in general from YouTube that need way more exposure. Instead they paid out way more for a mid singer to make a decent song that doesn't match the theme of the game at all. Like seriously, why not have a song about the past and future or something? For that matter why Ed? Why not a Spanish singer for the Spain region? It just seems pretty fake for Pokemon as a company to keep getting these random celebrities that have nothing to do or say about the series at all until they're being paid to say OMG I LOVE POKÉMON PIKACHU IS MY FAVORITE. It's disingenuous basically. If Ed were like "oh yes I like pokemon, my favorite game is Platinum and my favorite Pokémon is Lucario" or "My favorite game is Black 2 and my favorite Pokémon is Slowpoke" or something, I'd be more inclined to believe the hype, but as it stands alongside all the other celebrities, it just screams fake fan.

Anyway, back to the game, I think that covers most of what I dislike that has nothing to do with glitches or performance. There's probably more, but for now this seems enough. Reminder that I still like the game, but I'm not going to hold back on what bothers me.

And now I talk about glitches and performance. Pretty much everyone and their grandma have, but it needs to be pointed out until it's fixed.

I'm going to list everything I HAVE PERSONALLY encountered. If you somehow haven't encountered a single thing anyone else is talking about, 1. You're lying, 2. You have and just don't realize it, and 3. You're some special miracle child that needs to go buy a lotto ticket because that is highly unlikely.

Now, what I have personally encountered while playing:

Slow downs- slowdowns to the point that it takes 20 seconds to finish a jump. Slow downs to the point that I feel like I'm trying to emulate X on my laptop. Slowdowns that drag on and on to the point that it's 3x slower than it should be.

Somehow the game works better in hand held- not by a lot, but better. This tells me that they probably didn't spend a lot of time optimizing it for docked mode and literally developed it for hand held.

The world flickers. You notice it a lot for far away locations but even indie games don't have this issue. Sometimes it flickers black or it flickers blue. It's so frequent that I really am convinced that the game wasn't finished.

Wall clipping. Pokémon sometimes spawn INSIDE walls. This makes hunting a specific one annoying or avoiding them annoying, as you're hugging a cave wall to get around a Diglett and WHOA WALL SALANDIT. It's jarring to say the least and is not only immersion breaking but super, super low quality. You'll especially notice it in those tube caves around the mines. If you're not careful you're liable to fall through the entire world.

Landmass... swelling??? I really don't know how to describe it, but there's areas where I guess land doesn't load in until you're RIGHT THERE like 20 yards away, and it makes rocks, islands, and mountains feel like they're inflating right before your eyes.

Falling forever. This... idk how this happens but it's happened a few times. You fall off a mountain or into a river, and instead of landing, your animation is locked into falling. You can't open any menus btw so you can't warp away. You just have to sit there and wait or restart and lose progress.

Black screen. My friend also experienced this, and it's just when the game won't load. No indication that it's loading, no timer or bar to indicate how far along we are, and it might just not load. I waited 8 minutes for a single cutscene to load one time out of curiosity when this happened to me. My friend ended up having to quit and reload.

The eating animations just don't work sometimes

My pokemon sometimes takes on the texture of a nearby building. It'd be cool if it were intentional, but it's not.

Pokemon clipping through the floor- especially noticeable in gym fights

Sometimes my pokemon won't fight in LG mode. It's not a shiny, because I swapped to a different pokemon and suddenly it's killing and mayhem again.

The PC. Just. Yeah. Takes forever to load one box, then if you go to another it has to load that one, and if you go back it has to load that one again. It makes organizing so fucking tedious.

Picnics take forever to load

Massive stuttering, especially while capturing. Yall know that clip of Psyduck being captured and the whole background unloads and reloads? Happened to me but in a different area all together.

And of course, game crashes. I had 3, one of which was after a HEAVY slow down.

And there's more of course out there. I personally haven't done co op yet, so I'm just curious how bad that is after everything I've seen online of Dick Wigletts and models just going crazy.

As far as non game breaking performance stuff I hate:

Draw distance is still stupidly low. Higher than SwSh, but I should not be seeing grass and trees growing before my eyes.

Low frame rate for objects in the same area. I'm sure we all know about our 10fps classmates, but this also affects Pokémon that are clearly loaded in but jutting around like action figures. Windmills are especially noticeable, not winding or just having abysmally low fps when very close to them. Honestly how do you fuck up a WINDMILL? Thats SUPPOSED to spin and be visible from a distance.

Reflections. Just... Game Freak, do you not know how reflections work? Because that's not it sweeties. At all. It's especially noticeable at the very pit of Area Zero.

My Switch gets VERY hot running this game. It has no issues with BotW or XBC2. It's not a model issue because of the low draw distance, and again, those games rendered way more complex objects at a distance in comparison. I'm reminded of how SwSh apparently fucked up Roku tvs at launch. Like wow, I was actually concerned for a bit. Game Freak just does not know how to optimize.

That's about all I can think of right now but I feel like I'm forgetting something.

All I can think of is what this game could of been. It could have been my favorite next to LA and BW2 if stupid fucking rich people in suits gave a damn about the game beyond their holiday cash in.

You can observe this from various angles, but this is my take on the issues present in the game:

The game reportedly took about 3 and a half years to make, starting production close to LA according to leaks and datamines. Most of us can agree that they should probably get about 5 or 6 years per game. We know GF works with multiple teams on a project: I theorize roughly 3. Team A is for new gens, Team B is for enhancements, and Team C is more of a fuck around team for games like Arceus or remakes. That's just on the Pokémon angle, because we know they have the Gear Project and like to work on other projects despite not having the manpower- because they really thought Little Town Heroes would be bigger than Pokémon. At the very least, it doesn't appear that we had a side project to blame for detracting from the main game like LTH did to SwSh.

But I'm going on a tangent. SV and LA clearly needed more time in the oven (and I'd argue more time debugging).

However, the belief is that GF is being bullied around by TPC and Nintendo to produce a new game every year and a new gen every 3 years to keep up with everything else going on around the franchise.

TCG

Anime

Manga

Plushies

Toys

Clothes

Merch

Music videos

And way more.

Each new gen serves as the spearhead for everything else the franchise does until the next gen- which for the last 9 years as of writing this has been consistently every 3 years.

In other words, the belief is that if Game Freak has to delay, TPC and Nintendo loses a LOT of money in delaying everything else and pisses off shareholders.

I somewhat buy into this theory, but I refuse to believe the people in charge of GF are being bullied into it. It's much more likely that someone in management, producing, and directing are writing checks their teams are struggling to cash. GF has a big turnover rate, and employees have described the environment as basically not being able to move up by merit alone while promotions go to people the higher ups like personally instead.

In other words, too many "yes men" are saying "yes we can make a huge game like Legends Arceus in 3 years. Oh, we also have to release a new mainline title? Yes, we can do that! No no no, don't worry, it'll be done by then!"

And again, this is just me guessing and theorizing and I by no means have inside information. However, this seems the most likely answer to me. Imo there was a significant drop in quality from one game to the next when we hit 3d, and especially in games directed by Ohmori where there's so many corners cut, he may as well be the antithesis to a Wendy's hamburger (their motto is no cut corners, hence the square patties- get the joke? Okay moving on). He's most likely not the sole person to blame here, but rather one of many "yes men" that do not want to give their higher ups a wrong answer.

I will say that LA (directed by Iwao of USUM fame) and SV are absolutely progressive for the franchise in so many ways, but most of the community agrees that they are not living up to their potential- and the sad thing is, they're probably already planning a Let's Go Johto game (like USUM, the words Let's Go! are directly in the game and there are many gold and silver items to buy) and eventually gen 10 to come out within the next 3 years already.

I could sit here and talk about or theorize all the ways they could give themselves more time, but the reality of it is this: pokemon is a product, not your neighbor you grew up with or the mom and pop shop you go to to support them, and they are definitely not indie (hasn't been since gen 3 I'd argue but I'm willing to push as far as gen 6). New gens especially are just commercials for merch for the rest of the franchise. No matter what, the games will make about 5 times their initial investments back- it literally sold 10 million copies in Japan in the first 3 days alone. Boycots don't work because it's literally too big to fail. Seriously, I saw a guy who literally went out of his way to collect multiple copies of each game from around the world for collection purposes- that alone gave TPC about $1k probably. Not to mention scalpers.

So the best thing people can do, imo, and especially reviewers, is to grade HARSHER on the games. The only way they'll learn is if there's enough back lash- remember dexit? That's how we got 250 pokemon added back in after the initial 400. Even if you love it, point out what could be better, no matter how small, and point out every glitch you encounter. They have to do something different for the next gen, because at this point the next gen will be even buggier on the next Nintendo console.

And again, I know nobody from GF reads this, but I'll say it anyway: NOW is the time to negotiate for more time. Not 2 months before release, NOW is while gen 10 is still in development. Push for 5 years minimum, and let some other studios fill in the gaps in the mean time. I know for damn sure a Colosseum 3 or a side game in a similar vein developed by another studio would more than keep me and the super fans occupied for a while.

But. Reviewing SV as they are now... 5/10 seems fair. Listen, I love the game and I think it is super duper ambitious and fun when it works- but the glitches and performance are so distracting that it breaks my immersion. The graphics are close to being good but NEED so much polish. Even with all of my nitpicks, I would have gladly given this an 8/10 if only it were FUCKING FINISHED.

But alas, it's not. It's released and I'm more than sure some business men who couldn't give a shit about the actual game or fans are saying it's perfect, but it's not finished. Several million people basically got a glorified beta game thinking they'd patch it day 1.

That being said, and I fully acknowledge I am a pessimistic POS that assumes the worst in everything, so this is surprising coming from me: a patch is most likely coming. This is THE new gen game, meaning this is what's going to go for competitive and World tournaments. Rn there's exploits to make OKO moves like Sheer Cold have 100% accuracy and it's not due to an ability like No Gaurd. That, and it's pretty much guaranteed that they're going to add DLC to expand on the story- too much in the game is pointing to that. Nintendo also has been forced to give out refunds- pokemon seemingly being one of the few games that make them break their no refund policy, something I'm sure they're unhappy about as publisher. It is within their best interest and ours that, especially for gameplay and tournament purposes, they patch and finish on the performance end. Visuals will probably still be fucked, but even SwSh got patched eventually. This isn't a situation they can run from like LA, it's something they are probably required to fix. Hell, a sound designer from the game found out about the E4 music glitch, so I think they have to be aware.

But pessimism aside, I do want to thank the people at Game Freak that tried their best to create something incredible. Behind all the business politics and corners cut by higher ups, there are solid ideas all around, and an amazing, heart felt attempt at a story and pokemon designs once more. This is by no means directed at the assholes that inflicted crunch times or approved of releasing the game in this state mind you. Those people deserve to be fired and never allowed near the franchise again.

So yes. 5 out of 10 for now, fix the performance and it'd be an easy 8.

Hopes for the next game: I know I said that the open world was a good "start" for the franchise, but GF has this issue where every game has a mediocre but good "start" to something they hardly improve on.

Oh, the graphics in LGPE were bland but its a good start for the next game!

The Wild Area is boring and lifeless- but it's a good start for the next game!

The DLCs vastly improved on the exploration- it's a great start for the next game!

LA gave us so much freedom to explore- it's a great start for-

You see my point. SV gave a great start for open world exploration, but I just really want them to NAIL it for once. There's clearly someone on the inside that gives a shit- maybe not the higher ups, but there is someone that does. I want them to keep trying their best to improve on what we have.

That's another thing: let's try to not regress and try not to come up with another useless gimmick. I say the next gen or next game just needs to focus on improving what we have now instead of trying to come up with what comes after Terrastilizing.

Seriously, just polish the graphics, no new gimmicks, get the game working and prioritize optimization. Do what went right with SV and LA again. That's all we need.

As far as other things, maybe base the next region in Australia? Prime candidate for open world with lots and lots and LOTS of unique pokemon species. I don't want to see it for 5 years though because I want it to be rich with diverse biomes and exploration and better graphics.

And ffs just give us better character customization. This was piss poor.

And for the next game- which I sincerely hope isn't just LG Johto because I HATED LGPE- just go ahead and delay. We know you want to come out in 2 years, make it 3 instead.

Honestly just optimize SV, add updates and FREE DLC to it (seriously, they owe us), expand the story, maybe add in a couple of new quests and pokemon, do something with that unused area in the NE area of the map or add in something like the Canary Islands, or hell, past and future versions of the region we have now, and that will keep us occupied.

Just. Finish your god damn games. This is inexcusable of the world's richest franchise. Finish your fucking games. SV were so fun but they aren't finished. FINISH THE FUCKING GAME.

[rufeepeach]

1/2 I'm a rumbelle shipper indeed! I actually made it through 3 seasons and I know it would hurt but the question is how much? (I mean I don't like to get hurt at all, but I used to be a game of thrones fan and a Jaime/Brienne shipper, so if no one ends up crying in the middle of a winter night in a nightgown while the other one leaves to die the stupidest death ever with his fucking twin sister - I probably could bear it (sorry it's been 3 years and I'm still fuming)).

2/2 Like, on the scale from 1 to 10 where 1 is a fluffy happy ending and 10 is something that makes you want to scream, throw things, wipe out your memory and regret coming across this show - how bad it is?

So as I've said to my mind you've already gotten everything you're going to get out of OUAT lol.

HOWEVER it sounds like you're gonna keep going despite it all which... it would be hypocritical of me to criticise that decision. So. You're probably aware season 7 is totally different to the others - it's set I think like 20(?) years later but also time fuckery generally means some characters are older and some stay the same age (i.e. we keep the actors who wanted to stay on and lose everyone else).

All this to say, there’s two endings: S6, which ends the series storyline started in the pilot, and S7, which tries to end all of it, only more and bigger and with more CGI WHEEE!!

The S6 finale, I will admit, is pretty fucking good. 6B had no right to pull it out of the hat the way it did after the absolute crap they’d been pulling for years by that point, but y’know what? It works. And if you decide that the whole of 6A was the villain of 6B fucking with everyone’s head with magic to get her way a-la Community’s ‘gas leak’ season you can even overlook some of the OOC melodrama. So, S6 ends pretty perfectly. You should stop there. That’s where I meant to stop. It is an unapologetically happy ending - they make a big deal, actually, out of it being a ‘happy beginning’. Nice subversion of the fairytale thing, you thought, nice way to say ‘the first day of the rest of their lives’ we all said.

And in my opinion, you need to stop there and accept S7 as the creators’ bad fanfic.

S7 then has one (1) Rumbelle episode where it crumples that nice hopeful ‘happy beginning’ into a ball and throws it into the saddest possible well it could find because what we really needed was to see the whole happy ending play out and somehow still end tragically for Rumple.

Some people love S7 - I’ll be clear that I only saw that one episode and the finale (which uh, also sucked imho?) - so I’ll let others clarify if it’s actually worth watching. No disrespect to anyone who did watch it! Weaver gets a lot of love and Hook seems better in that season but I really had had enough by then.

As you can tell, I have a lot of very bitter opinions about this show. Y’know since these responses get longer every time.

[8bit-mau5]

23 28 35 38 for reva

on a scale of 1-10, how cool do you think you are. do your friends agree?

"I'm cool as shit and I reckon my partners think so too. Don't listen to what Shay says though."

do you think the alternian empire’s rampant colonisation of alien planets for labor and resources is a worthwhile and valid use of troll technology or do you think it’s immoral.

"Wasn't prepared for a hard hitter. Whatever, I can talk shit. What are they gonna do? Kill me again? Ha! I don't think there's any fuckin use. You go out and conquer day in and day out and you're gonna wear the whole empire thin. Eventually they won't even be able to govern this god forsaken little planet and'll have to solely rely on propaganda to keep things in check. What's a queen to a planet she can't reach anyway? Waste of time. Waste of resources. Waste of lives.

There's better shit to do, maybe the ~empire~ will learn that once they see their clock's tickin."

if you were stuck in an elevator, what would you do?

"Waist a couple hours before I up n decide to break out through the roof."

and the least successful thing you’ve ever done? every troll has a bad day.

==> You shrug

"Runnin to the fleet. Could found somewhere else to fuck off to 'stead of that first."

» UNHINGED TROLL Q&A (ask meme) PART 1

[dilesxpressions]

Sean Vincent Batoon

1. Name, Year, Major, and Hometown

Sean Vincent Batoon, 3rd Year. Design Major (Tech Management Minor incoming), Hometown : Pacifica Ca

2. What’s your roman empire?

When I listen to rap music the first thing I do is dissect the instrumental mentally and imagine how it looks separately and how it would be laid out on a Digital Audio workstation.

3. What is the best compliment you have ever received?

The best compliment I ever received was when someone complimented my skin, I think that was a first for me and it actually stuck with me.

4. If your life was a movie what genre would it be (comedy, horror, drama, etc.) and what actor would play you?

Honestly I would say the genre it would be is an action movie, realistically I have a really calm lifestyle I have but when there's action, THERE'S ACTION.

5. What is something on your college bucket list?

Something on my bucket list would have to be meeting lifelong friends and connections during my time in college. And looking at it from here, I would check it off.

6. What’s your guilty pleasure? (song, movie, food etc.)

I refuse to absorb new media, I’ll listen to the same music, watch the same shows, eat the same food, I’m currently in a comfortable and stagnant phase that I’m hoping to get out of soon.

7. What are your bad habits?

Procrastination, Forgetfulness, and being too blunt.

8. What are your favorite song lyrics?

“I'm so-I'm so reborn, I'm movin' forward Keep movin' forward, keep movin' forward” - Reborn - Kid Cudi & Kanye West “Girl, don't play yourself, give me mental health You can't slay yourself, take off my Louis belt Bringing up my past like that's gonna help I could pay ourselves, I got plenty wealth” - Guillotine - Pi’erre Bourne “Let me hit it raw like fuck the outcome Ayy, none of us would be here without cum” - All Mine - Kanye West

9. Defend your unpopular opinion/ hot take

My take is that Kanye West made Taylor Swift famous, if we really think about it. Taylor Swift was popular but after the VMA incident she sky-rocketed in popularity because of Kanye West calling her out. I'm just saying to all the swifties, Kanye made y’all.

10. Describe a time where you had to step up and be a leader?

A time where I had to step up and be a leader is when I’m playing League of Legends and my team is feeding and saying how we should forfeit and move on to the next game, but me with a decent score and an attack damage carry, I tell my team to stop talking and listen to my callouts and we’ll win. I simply say in the chat with all the commotion “don’t worry we scale” after I typed this I proceeded to peep game and lock in playing like I was on an esports level. Showcasing A-class performance and making the most strategic calls to lead our team to victory. We had some bad fights and my team would complain saying I was wasting their time and saying how we should have given up a long time ago. But I would ensure their victory was closer to us than the opposite team. With the game now being an hour long the deciding fight was soon to approach. In the last fight I gave instructions on who to target, who to protect and what to secure. As the fight conclude we wiped their whole team and as we rushed down the lanes destroying the their base into shambles I proceeded to lay down the the ultimatum to the enemy team that was talking smack all game “GGEZ” as the game ended I talked so much mess in the post - game lobby and told my teammates how I ensured victory was in our hands.

[thequietmanno1]

Thelreads, MHA 273, Replies Part 2

1) “This is seriously fucked up, everything about how this quirk worked was revamped to the point of madness. Shigaraki was already terrifying with the raw power of it, but now- holy fuck, now I`m truly scared.”- Tomura was dangerous on an individual level when he first appeared, but it seemed laughable that his Quirk could be a threat to All Might if the later didn’t have several limiting factors in place to leave him vulnerable to his Bad Touch. Now, with Decay mastered to the point he can devastate a city with it alone, having the poer of AFO backing him up is just complete overkill. Tomura’s Decay is now potent enough he could theoretically stand a chance of killing All Might in his prime with it. 2) “Wait what the fuck- Are those the quirk erasing bullets? Oh jesus fuck I forgot that they even existed for a moment- Well, it was like, only one back then, right? Or aren`t those bullets, are they quirk flasks? Wait, did the doc managed to collect genetic material from Overhaul?”- He managed to duplicate the Bullets from the samples they retrieved from Overhaul- and it was technically Eri’s genetic material that was powering them – which means that, which Garaki’s capture and the machine being broken, those few remaining bullets Tomura’s salvaged are all that’s left of that game-breaking trump card. Dangerous in a long-term prospect, but as it stands, Tomura won’t really have any need of them to get the job done – their main threat was wide-scale distribution to the grunts of the PLF as a means of turning the odds against the more-skilled heroes they’d be contending with. Still, it means that X-Less’s actions weren’t entirely for naught, as he’s left Tomura with a still-limited number of available bullets to use. 3) “YEAH SHIGARAKI, WE NOTICED, BUT WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SERIOUSLY LET YOUR PHONE CHARGING RIGHT BY YOUR TANK?

WEREN`T YOU INSIDE THAT SHIT FOR MONTHS? SHIGARAKI PLEASE THAT`S GONNA FUCK UP YOUR BATTERY”-  Tomura’s rich now thanks to Re-destro’s resources, he can afford to burn through a few phones – and it also indicates that Tomura wanted to waste no time in enacting his ‘purge’ of hero society the second he got out of that tank. He wanted direct access to Machia and his troops from the word go, and that resolute lack of hesitation with getting shit done bodes poorly for everybody… 4) “Yes, but some moron with an X over his crotch ended up messing everything. Now we`ll have to make shit up on the fly.

God, this is gonna be fucked up”- Flying by the seat of our pants and making it up as we go. Time for Izuku’s moment to shine then. 5) “MACHIA GOT HIS SCENT SOME CHAPTERS AGO, I REMEMBER THAT, BUT NOW HE HAS DIRECT ORDERS TO ACT, AND SOMETHING TELLS ME HE`S GONNA TAKE IT REALLY SERIOUSLY

AND THIS IS HOW EVERYTHING SPIRALS OUT OF CONTROL, RIGHT?”- Two unstoppable monsters at either battlefield, and neither combatants facing them seem capable of even slowing them down, let alone defeating them. They call the Secret Weapon a ‘game changer’ for a reason… 6) ““A few moments before hell breaks loose“ you should add, because fuck me those people have no idea that they`re right over Yellowstone before it blows up.”- Nobody expects the secret Kaiju monster hiding in the basement…. 7) “Poor Fat, he ran so much to get here, just to have to run all the way back”- Fatgum will have burned himself back into Fitgum by the end of this from all the exercise. 8) “Alright, so Geten merely managed to throw them off the groove for a moment, but they are already back at it full strength, which is an actual problem, because that means they are getting closer and closer to Machia without knowing he`s up again.

Fuck`s sake”-  Genten was just a precursor to the absolute chaos Machia’s going to unleash – and the scariest thing is that the big lug is doing it all unintentionally, just following his orders without specifically caring about any immediate context around him. 10) “Didn`t that dude die-

…

OH GOD

THAT IS TOGA, ISN`T IT?”- I think we found the Imposter…. 11) “Yeah well, Dabi had… other things to handle… And funnily enough, if he had taken someone with him he probably could`ve have taken down Hawks back then, but he just disappeared without a word. Dammit Dabi.”- Dabi had something a little different in mind to what his ‘allies’ did when he went off to do his own thing. At the very least, none of them would have been ok with him risking Twice’s life like that, even to further his own goals. As Ironic as it is, Dabi’s efficiency makes him a boon to the League in spite of his absolutely horrible team player mentality. 12) “OH GOD SO IT IS HER DOWN THERE

JESUS CHRIST, TOGA IS ON A RAMPAGE RIGHT NOW, AND GOING BY WHAT COMPRESS SAID, IT DOESN`T LOOK LIKE SHE`S AS MENTALLY STABLE AS SHE WAS BEFORE”- Toga was an efficient and stealthy serial-killer back when she was Mrs Nice murderer. With Jin killed like that, she’s in no mood to play nice anymore. 13)  “OH GOD THE GROUND IS CRACKING, HE`S COMING

I KNEW HE WOULD COME OUT EXACTLY WHERE THEY WERE

BECAUSE WHY WOULDN`T HE, THAT`S WHERE THE MOST CHAOS CAN BE HAD”-Given that was just his hand emerging, it seems machia’s gone full giant underground to easily dig his way to the surface, so it doesn’t matter when they are, that whole Villa is about to get worn like a hat. 14) “OH AND HERE HE COMES TO FIGHT SHIGARAKI

HE THINKS HE HAS A SHOT- WHAT, YOU`RE GONNA THROW A FIRE TORNADO AT HIM? DID YOU EVEN SEE WHAT HE DID THE MOMENT HE WOKE UP?

YOU ARE WAY OVER YOUR HEAD HERE ENDEAVOR

THIS IS NOT A HUMAN ANYMORE, YOU`RE DEALING WITH A DEMON MADE FLESH. SHIGARAKI ALMOST RIVALED THE GUN DEVIL HERE

YOU`RE GONNA BE MADE INTO ASHES BEFORE YOU NOTICE”- Sadly, it’s either try and fight him now, even hopelessly outgunned, or let Tomura rampage over everybody and fight him later when the situation’s gotten even worse. Tomura’s become an implacable force of devastation that’s an enemy to heroes everywhere, and the best chance is to fight him before he’s used to his new bag of tricks, or else he’ll destroy everybody once he’s mastered them all… @thelreads