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dreamwritesimagines · 3 years

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Burn The Witch 23 - Haunted Heart [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, lovers to enemies, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Coming home can cause issues.

Series Masterlist

SIX MONTHS LATER

You flipped the knife in your hand as the guy tied to the chair glared at you.

“You know,” you trailed off, “I’ve had a really shitty couple of months, Johnny- can I call you Johnny?”

“No.”

“Rude,” you commented, “Fine. John. I’ve had a really shitty couple of months so you really don’t want to try me right now. Just tell me where I can find your boss.”

“You’ll never find him you stupid bitch.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Since I’m going to kill you in a couple of minutes I feel like I can share some things with you,” you said, “My best friend says I keep everything bottled and I should talk about my feelings.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“See, that’s exactly how I feel!” you pointed at him, “Thank you. I mean, I feel angry at myself. I kind of fucked up with the man I love.”

“Jesus Christ, just kill me already.”

“I’m waiting for a text to do that Johnny,” you pointed out, waving your phone at him. “So, I tricked him and used him and threw him to wolves. And then Accords 2.0 didn’t pass and he has been pardoned once again, and he’s a free man now. I have a strong feeling that he’s not the ‘forgive and forget’ type of guy. You know, assassin to assassin.”

“You’re the chattiest assassin I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, I’m trying to improve myself,” you said, “I mean what exactly should I do? I don’t even trust my agency at this point, my handler lied to me and I have been at this fucking place for six months now, hunting you down. Well, your boss but…”

“You’ll never find him.”

“We’ll see about that my friend,” you said, “So anyway, like what am I supposed to do? I lost the one guy I actually loved. How do you cope with that? Because drinking doesn’t work, sleeping with others doesn’t work…. Nothing seems to—“ you were cut off when your phone vibrated and you touched the screen to open the text message.

From: Julian

Go for it.

“Wait, no no no, I’ll talk—“

“Kind of too late,” you pointed the gun at him, “Nice to meet you Johnny.”

With that you pulled the trigger, silencer doing its job as there was no loud bang or anything. His body fell back with the impact, and you heaved a sigh.

“Maybe I need a therapist I can’t kill,” you mumbled and walked out of the warehouse to approach the car before opening the door to the passenger seat to get in.

“Is it done?” Julian asked and you nodded, rubbing at your eyes.

“Yep.”

“Are you hungry?”

You made a face, “Just because the General sent you here does not mean we’re going to become buddies.”

“I’m not trying to become buddies with you,” Julian stated, “I just want to eat fries and there’s a two for one deal.”

You eyed him up and down.

“Fine, I could eat fries.” You leaned back in the seat as he started driving, keeping your eyes on the road. Soon enough, you reached the city center and Julian got fries from a food truck, then sat across from you.

“So,” he said, “You do realize this whole thing would’ve been over by now if we actually worked together?”

“I’m not going on the field with you.”

“The General sent me here to help you.”

You dipped the fry into sauce, then popped it into your mouth, “You can help me by pretending you’re not here.”

“Y/N.”

“You know what they say Julian. Fool me once…”

“Don’t tell me you’re still holding that grudge.”

“You mean when you left me behind to die on the last mission we were together?” you asked back, “That grudge?”

“I told you—“

“I’m not going to talk about that with you,” you cut him off, “And I work better alone. Who told you we could waste the guy by the way?”

“The General.”

You grabbed the salt shaker to pour some salt on the fries, causing Julian to make a face.

“Are you kidding me? That was salty enough-“

“Why did he not text me?”

“No idea. Maybe he’s avoiding you because he promised you handler and here you are. Field spy.”

Your jaw clenched.

Or maybe he’s avoiding me because he fucking lied to me.

You had to give it to him, it was the perfect plan. The moment he had suspected you were getting too close to Bucky, he had come up with the one thing he knew that would make you switch sides.

And that-

That was below the belt yes, but that was also masterly.

But at the end of the day, you barely had two people to trust in the entire world, and you seriously doubted you could ever forgive the General for what he had done. You knew he held duty above all, above family and surely above you, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

You shook your head at yourself and grabbed another piece of fry.

“So um…” Julian shifted his weight, “Are you okay?”

You shot him a glare, arching a brow, “Peachy.”

“No I mean… About Barnes.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This whole Accords 2.0 failure, there’s no way we could go after him again.”

“I don’t want to go after him again.”

“You don’t want revenge?”

That made you straighten up your back and you put the fry down, “And why exactly would I want revenge?”

That made Julian fall silent and you nibbled on your lip.

“What exactly did the General tell you before you came here?”

“That there was a job here.”

“Bullshit,” you replied way too quickly, “Did he send you here to be my babysitter? He thinks I’ll go after Barnes myself is that it? That’s why they sent you here months after I left the country but right after Accords 2.0 didn’t pass.”

Julian licked his lips.

“Listen, the agency wants to keep you safe—“ he started but then his phone beeped. He grabbed it to take aa look at the screen, then cussed under his breath.

“What?”

“Check your texts.”

You touched the screen and frowned as your eyes skimmed the text.

From: General

Time to come home.

“Well,” you muttered, your heart dropping to your stomach, “Shit.”

***

Coming back home was harder than ever now. After catching up with Keith and Chloe, you were taken to your new apartment that was given to you by the agency as usual, and for the whole night you couldn’t sleep.

Even if there was no trace of Bucky in your new apartment –in your new life, you still couldn’t shake off this feeling. It was as if the moment you had entered the country, Bucky had entered your life in an instant.

Odds were, you wouldn’t really see him again. After all it was a big city, and Bucky wasn’t exactly the social type.

So your first week back in New York wasn’t exactly terrible. You were still waiting for your orders while getting to know to the city slowly, because after long missions it always took time for you to remember you had a real life there, real memories—

Well, as real as it could be, for a spy.

“Just see it as a vacation,” Chloe had said, “They threw you into another mission as soon as you got out of the country, it’s just a delayed vacation.”

As far as vacations went though, this one just sucked.

Maybe it was because you couldn’t keep away from places you and Bucky had been too, like this coffee place where you had first officially met.

You sipped your coffee, scrolling down on the news website as your eyes skimmed yet another article about Accords and whether you could trust superheroes or not, but you were soon distracted when someone pulled the seat across from you, making you look up from your phone.

And as soon as you did, your heart dropped.

You had to give it to the General, he was manipulative, he was a liar and he had betrayed your trust terribly but the one thing he had done right was training you well. Aside from that one second, you managed to adapt a look of nonchalance on your face, slowly putting your phone down.

“Hello Cap.”

Sam raised his brows and eyed you up and down.

“You’re back?”

You could swear he could hear your heartbeat and you shrugged your shoulders, looking around.

“Yeah,” you said, “Big apple and everything.”

“So much for the small town girl.”

“I have never been a small town girl,” you drawled, “Never been to Oregon either.”

“Yeah, I can tell.”

You turned your coffee cup on the table just so you could do something with your hands.

“Why?” he asked after a beat and you shifted your weight despite your whole training of feeling calm and collected, nervousness hitting you out of nowhere.

“You’re a veteran, Wilson,” you managed to say, “You don’t need me to tell you how the chain of command works. Army doesn’t care how we feel about orders.”

“I’m very familiar with how chain of command works,” he pointed out, “But you’re not a soldier, Y/N. You’re a spy.”

“That makes it even worse,” you stated, “I know it sounds like an excuse, but… you don’t know how my agency works. I don’t get to say no to orders, and I sure as hell don’t get to blow my own cover.”

“But you wanted to, didn’t you?”

Jesus Christ, Wilson was really good at this observation thing.

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” you said, “I’m no use to anyone if I develop a conscience.”

“But you did,” he insisted, “Why else would you come to help us? Why else would you warn him beforehand?”

“He told you about that?”

He shot you a look, “What do you think, Y/N?”

You scoffed a laughter. “I was feeling generous,” you said, “No other reason.”

He kept his gaze on you for a couple of seconds, as if trying to see whether you would cave before he took a deep breath.

“You know he was going to propose, right?”

That-

That was just too much. You could feel your jaw hanging as you stared at him in complete silence, his words echoing in your ears.

“No,” you said after a moment, then shook your head fervently, your nose in the air, “No you’re wrong.”

“I’m not,” Sam said, “Apparently he was looking for this… house painted in white with—a red door or something.”

Don’t cry.

Do not fucking cry.

Spies don’t cry over heartbreak.

You clenched your jaw and blinked back the tears, straightening your back.

“It’s a good thing he didn’t get to, then.”

“Y/N, he loved you.”

“No Sam, he loved someone who doesn’t exist,” you replied, “Sweet small town girl with sundresses and smiles and some house in the suburbs with kids and all that shit. Girls like me don’t get that ending, I have way too much blood on my hands.”

He pressed his lips together and you cleared your throat.

“How much does he hate me?”

“Why do you think he hates you?”

“Assassins aren’t good at forgiving,” you said, “I would know, we don’t have that talent.”

“That’s not a talent, that’s a choice.”

“It really isn’t,” you muttered, “So?”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

You let out a bitter laugh, “Yeah no. Actions have consequences and I’d rather not cross paths with the deadliest assassin in the world after double crossing him.”

“But you want him to forgive you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Intuition,” he said and pushed his chair back to stand up.

“He didn’t kill your father, Y/N.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I know,” you said, “Trust me, I would’ve walked away so much easier if he had.”

“Enjoy your coffee,” he said and walked out of the coffee house. You threw your head back, closing your eyes.

“Yep. I shouldn’t have come back.”

***

“I never thought I’d say this, but I kind of hate that we’re not living so close anymore,” you pressed the phone between your shoulder and your ear and opened the door to your apartment as Keith chuckled.

“I knew you’d miss me.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re a softie deep inside. Very very deep inside.”

“If you repeat that in front of anyone I swear to God…” you muttered and he groaned.

“Have I told you they’re putting me in the same team as Julian?”

“You guys have a new mission?”

“Not a long one probably.”

“Why the fuck am I—“

“Because you’re on a vacation,” he cut you off, “And also they’re probably going to make you a handler, that’s worth waiting for.”

“That or….”

“We’re not talking about that on the phone,” Keith said quickly, “Amateur.”

“Careful there, I’ll outrank you soon enough,” you said, walking to the bathroom to wash your hands. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Alright, see you later!” he said and hung up. You put your phone into your pocket, then washed your hands and made your way to the kitchen.

It was only when you put the wine bottle back into the fridge that you noticed something was off. Your body moved on its own accord, before you knew it you had already grabbed the knife in your boots and threw it to the figure in the dark corner of the room but he easily caught it, metal hitting what sounded like another kind of metal before he stepped out of the corner. Your breath caught in your throat, and for the first time in your life you froze, all the training leaving your mind.

You were supposed to be looking for a weapon, any kind of weapon but somehow, your body refused to move.

Bucky turned your knife in his hands, his gaze pinning you to your spot before he tilted his head.

“Hi honey,” he said, his voice way too cold. “I’m home.”

Chapter 24

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagines

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spidernerdsblog · 3 years

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Match made in Hell : Prologue

A/N : Well this series will be hella angsty. Hope you like this. Feedbacks and suggestions are always welcome.

Pairing : Mob! Tom Holland x Reader

Summary : you always wanted a simple life but to be born as the daughter of a dangerous mobster turned out to be a curse for you. Everything changes when your father gets your lover killed and forcefully marries you off to another mobster as a part of a deal. You hate your father and your husband the only thing you seek is now revenge. Will you ever be able to fall in love again or this burning hatred inside you will consume you?

Warnings : 18+,mentions of blood, murder, death, misogyny, implied sexual theme.

SERIES MASTERLIST

It’s the middle of the night as you sneak out from the backside of the dingy motel you and Ethan chose to hide for two days before catching a bus to Virginia. You were headed to the NY port bus terminus as you cautiously walked through the dimly lit alleyway. Both of you carrying a duffel bag in your hand as you briskly walk down to the main street.

"Ethan come on'' you whisper yell looking back to your boyfriend who was walking right behind you with whom you have planned to elope and start a new life away from your father's clutches who happens to be the mafia king of Northeast United States and wants to forcefully marry you off to another mobster of Europe to expand his territory and grab hold on their turf.

"Y/N are you sure your dad will not find us trying to flee right under his nose?" Ethan asks nervously. You smile softly as you put down your bag. Your hands reach up to his face cupping it gently.

"Don't you worry honey. I have a friend over there who has made all the necessary arrangements. In a few hours we will be in our paradise far from all of this. Just you and me, baby."

"But what if your dad already knows about us and sent his men to kill me."

"By the time daddy will come to know about us running away he will have nothing to do. He has no power in the southern states so we will be safe." You press your forehead on to his before stepping away from him and are about to turn around to resume walking but then the inevitable happens.

BANG! a gunshot was fired from a near distance.

You flinched at the deafening sound and felt something graze past you as some viscous liquid splattered on your face. You run your hand through your face to find blood stains and look at Ethan with horror in your eyes, a bullet has punched it's way right through his chest causing a hole in its wake as blood oozed out, his white shirt slowly turning scarlet red.

"Ethan!! oh my god!!" you gasped and rushed to him. Ethan felt dizzy, his vision going blurry as his body began to collapse. You quickly hold on to his weight slowly crouching down to kneel on the pavement placing his head on your lap.

"No! No! No, This can't happen!" You didn’t know what to do as you franctically pressed your hands together on the wound on his chest trying to stop the bleeding, tears running down your cheeks.

"Mija" your throat went dry at the deep voice. You turned your head to find your father standing all tall and powerful, face expressionless with his hands stuffed inside his pockets and right by his side is your step brother Julian. In no time his hunch men surrounded the area.

"Daddy he's dying do something please." you sobbed.

"You shouldn't have tried to run away Mija or else poor Ethan would have been alive to see tomorrow's daylight."

"C'mon now get up." He reached out his hand to you.

"What? No! Daddy please help him. He'll die. I'll do whatever you say, marry whoever you want but please save him." You begged him as fat tears rolled down your cheeks.

"It's too late for that Mija. You should have known well that after your engagement you are just a safe-keeping of the Holland's for us. Son-in-law is really upset with your behavior. He is the one who helped us track you down."

"Jules at least you try to understand." You turned to your step brother in despair.

"Enough sister we have to go, we don't want the whole NYPD chasing us for a petty collateral damage." he says sternly.

"You already are a big disgrace to the family. Thankfully my step brother-in-law is very generous to accept you even after all this."

"No I'm not going with you anywhere, either you shoot me like him or else I'll do it myself." You scrambled up back on your feet and with a swift move snatched the gun from the holster of one of his men standing near you. You pointed the gun to your head holding onto the trigger.

"Y/N Martinez enough is enough! Drop the gun now!" your father commands agitated.

"No!" you shakily press the trigger a little more as tears pricked your eyes.

"You'll not do that Y/N." your father warns again.

"Oh hell I'll do if I don't get to live with the love of my life then you will not get what you want." you spat trembling in rage.

"Y/N no.. No" Ethan croaked in pain, the angry demeanor you had softened at his voice.

"Ethan, honey.. " you dropped to your feet kneeling beside his weak body.

"if you die then I die too." You sniffled. Ethan threaded his fingers to yours.

"No, Y/N you - you have to live. For me. Promise me."

"No" you whimper.

"Promise me Y/N, this-this is my last wish" He took large gulps of air while he spoke. You screwed your eyes shut feeling helpless at the given moment.

"I-I promise Ethan." Your voice quivered.

"I love you Y/N.." he smiled weakly as his voice trailed off as it was becoming difficult for him to breathe.

"I love you too baby." You sniffled. Ethan's eyes were droopy as he struggled to stay awake. He was barely breathing.

"No, no Ethan, stay with me please." you clutched onto his hand desperately. He swallowed his last breath of air before succumbing to eternal sleep in your arms.

"Ethan?" you shake his lifeless body. "Ethan wake up!!" all was in vain as Ethan's limp body lay on the pavement.

"Ethaaan!!!" you wail.

"Take care of the body. I need to handle my ever rebellious daughter." your father ordered.

"Okay boss." one of his capos obliged.

"Now c'mon and let's get you prepared for your husband." your father grabbed on to your arm.

"No,no,no" you try to grasp onto Ethan's lifeless body. Your father ripped you apart from his body forcing you to stand up on your feet.

"It's your last week with us anyway, spend some time with your mother, make some happy memories, she will miss her only daughter the most."

"Happy memories?! You took every ounce of happiness from my life, you are a monster! You all are! I hate you!" you screamed struggling hard to free yourself from your father's firm grip.

"One day you'll know everything your daddy did was for your own good. So stop fighting and do as you are told like a good girl" Your father and brother Julian dragged you to the car. You were a walking dead when you reached your home which seemed a prison to you now. Your mother came rushing to you.

"Oh sweetie you're safe. Thank god I was so worried." she wrapped her arms around you in a hug.

"Mom.. Ethan.. He's gone." You broke down in her arms.

"It's ok sweetie. Don't worry everything will be fine. You are my strong girl I know you will get through this" she cradled your face pecking your forehead trying to console you.

"Ask your daughter to stop acting like a brat and learn how to be a good wife to her future husband and tend to his needs. Don't want the Holland's point fingers at us saying we didn't raise our daughter right."

"Why did you do this Victor?"

"After so many years are you questioning your husband Rosette?"

"No, I'm questioning a father and how could he do this to his only daughter?"

"She brought it upon herself." your mother was about to say something but was cut off by your father.

"No! I don't want to hear anything more about this. Just do what I said." he says sternly.

******

"The Martínez's will arrive in a week, start making all the necessary arrangements."

"Once the deal is done you will be taking over our family business son are you ready to sit on this throne?" The senior Holland asks his eldest son Tom in the presence of his younger twin sons Harry and Sam and Tom’s future consigliere and best friend Harrison as he stood in the middle of the spacious conference room patting on the big leather chair placed right in the middle of the wooden round table from where he has been running this empire all these years commanding men to do all his dirty work and sealing fate of people who didn’t comply by his wishes.

"Always ready dad." Tom stood tall.

"I know you are, my son. This is the day I have been waiting for all my life."

"Okay now enjoy your last few days of freedom of a bachelor before you are a married man." he pats his shoulder proudly and was about to leave the room but turned to him again.

"One more thing you need to keep a tighter hold on your woman from now on Tom. Her carefree days are over, she needs to be made aware of her responsibilities including giving the family an heir."

"Yes dad."

As his father leaves with the twins Tom slumps down on one of the chairs with Harrison beside him. He lets out a long sigh taking out his phone.

The first thing he does is open your Instagram page and go through your pictures which has turned out to be a habit for him for the last three years. Harrison was sitting beside him as he saw your pictures too. Some were with your college friends, some you attending one of your dad's galas in the prettiest designer dresses and some bikini clad sunkissed aesthetic pictures of you on vacation on some exotic island. Tom thought you looked unearthly in every picture but his mood would go sour seeing the comments below of several guys objectifying your body. He felt like hunting them down and chopping off their fingers with which they typed such lewd comments.

Though he himself wasn’t a man of high morals either drinking, gambling, bringing in girls every night in spite of being engaged to you though each night he wished it was you on his bed, not some random hooker he picked up from the bar. He is well aware that you don’t like him and despise this whole marriage. But he has nothing to worry anymore now because in a few days you are going to be his for lifetime. And he is confident that he will win you over eventually.

"I see why you are hell bent to marry her, she's a siren." Harrison remarked snarkly, breaking Tom from his thoughts.

"Hopefully she sounds like one too" Tom chuckles.

"But you really want to spend the rest of your life with her? She doesn't seem to be the one to follow rules."

"She's always been a wild horse since childhood that is why I like her even more and trust me wild horses are more fun to tame Haz. I can assure you in no time she'll be roaming around like a puppy around me."

"And how do you know you'll be able to tame a headstrong girl like her?"

"That will not be an issue because once I make sure that my child is inside her she will have nothing to do." He smirks. "Motherly instincts, you know how that works. After all, she's a woman. How much ever she hates me she will never separate her child from his father."

"And once I will have her father removed from the picture and taken over their empire she will have nowhere to go."

"You know she'll hate you more than she already does after you kill her father."

"Her father is no less than a monster. I will be doing her a favor actually." Tom once again glances at a portrait picture of you.

"Princess your kingdom eagerly awaits your arrival." he mutters to himself with a smug grin on his face.

.................................................................................

Taglist in bio or just send an ask or dm I’ll add you

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland imagine #tom holland and reader #tom holland angst #tom holland and y/n

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oldsmobile-hotdogs · 3 years

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Questions for crossover jatp ghosts crossover fic: I hope Julian and the sunset curve boys talk about the fall of the Berlin Wall and the Yugoslav wars that happened when they were alive + Bill Cilnton. I wonder what pat and the band would talk about considering that they would of been kids when pat died? Do you think Julie would think of Les Mis and Hamilton cos Thomas and Kitty are from about the same time period as those musicals? I hope Julie calls Fanny Mary poppins.

Anon, or "Mimi", or "Lulu", or, heck, maybe even "Carl Birtles": Update: Not Carl Birtles. Carl Birtles sent me an ask and is cool, actually.

Stop. Right now. I'd say stop while you're ahead, but you are so far away from ahead at this point it's laughable.

For everyone confused, this is that "commenter from AO3" I joked about making a 2017-esque story time video about.

A couple days ago I uploaded the first chapter of a Julie and the Phantoms/BBC Ghosts crossover fic.

You know what? I’m gonna promo it here bc it’s my callout post and I can shill if I want to: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30681704/chapters/76661471

It was generally very well received and I've had a blast interacting with readers.

Except for this.

Honestly, there's so much to get into, so I’m putting it under a cut:

This was their first correspondence (email notif bc I deleted the comment, the deletion to be explained later):

(Funnily enough, the links very much do not work on AO3, making the comment only more jarring)

I gave you *so much* benefit of the doubt when I saw this comment, and assumed that maybe you're an ESL user, just very enthusiastic to share ideas, and I pretty much said so in my reply, but know that at that point I'd already had friends- who fucking know about this, don't you dare think you're getting me alone- tell me that you were being very demanding.

Below was my reply (another email notif):

I'm gonna be honest, I think I responded really well to what I was given, and now that I'd replied, I was pretty certain the situation was dealt with. You, evidently, didn't agree, as shown by your reply to my reply:

A word of advice: when replying to someone, at least pretend like you read what they wrote.

At this point I'm left wondering two things:

What do they expect from me, if a general reply is not it?

How much more shit do they have waiting to tell me to put in my- reminder, JATP/BBC Ghosts crossover, rated T, comedic- fic?

In order to avoid finding out either, I freeze the thread on AO3. I'm liveblogging all of this on Discord.

It's then that I notice that the username on AO3 isn't clickable, so even if I wanted to block or report them I couldn't. I assume, therefore, that they've deactivated, and since them seeing their comments gone and getting angry was the only thing stopping me deleting the comments, I delete the comments.

It's also at this point I see "Mimi" never left kudos. I guess I don't deserve praise until I mention "Bill Cilnton".

There's relative calm for a short amount of time, until I get another comment:

This one is much kinder than the others and doesn't mention any specific, weird, historical events, so the extent to which I think this is "Mimi" is debatable, but bestie I'm weirded out enough that anything that even uses the enter bar unnecessarily and misses out conjunctive words like "because" and "and" is going to activate fight or flight. Update: Carl Birtles is not Mimi or Lulu. Carl was just being genuinely kind and I misinterpreted it and that's on me.

However, "Carl"'s case is not helped by the fact I can't click his account either, that AO3 offers me the ability to report it as spam, and that guess who replies to "Carl"'s comment: Update: Carl, having done nothing wrong as he has, is therefore also a victim in the situation that is being replied to by Lulu. It would seem Lulu is trying to correct??? some of Carl's commentary.

You must think I didn't get a 7 on my English Literature GCSE because you seem to underestimate my ability to compare two texts.

So clearly this is "Mimi", who has also just replied to "Carl". "Lulu" is also deactivated, and I've fallen off the end of my tether, let alone reached it, at this point so I mark it as spam. "Carl" gets to stay bc he said the idea for the crossover was good. Update: Carl also gets to continue to stay because I have it on good faith that he's a stand-up dude.

So at this point you've readily admitted through your inability to shake up your writing style to using at least one sockpuppet to convince me to talk about the "Yugoslav wars".

If "Carl Birtles" is the real(-est) of them, and "Mimi" and "Lulu" are the sockpuppets, by the way, I have questions and ideas about what you do on your free evenings and I want them neither confirmed nor answered. Update: This is slanderous and I want to apologise wholeheartedly to Carl for making assumptions about him and judging his character. Once again, he is not Mimi or Lulu. He's just a normal, cool guy.

And now you come to me, on the day of my daughter's wedding on a different platform, leave me an anon ask in the exact same format as you're so fond of, and expect any different ??

Well, yeah, then I guess I'll give you special treatment this time.

Here's exactly why I will never include anything you have told me to include:

Julian and the Phantoms discussing the Berlin Wall would be highly inappropriate for the largely fluffy, cracky tone of my fanfiction, especially given how recently the event occurred, how many Eastern Germans still experience prejudice to this day because they were born within the old borders of the DDR, and because of how nuanced this, essentially proxy war, was and how ill-informed a huge amount of the world is on the actual factors in play during this time and the Cold War in general.

Julian and the Phantoms will not discuss Yugoslavia dissolving, nor the fallout and conflict that resulted, because it was genocidal. There is nowhere I can fit Julian, pantsted, casually asking Luke “hey do you remember when the Herzegovinas were killed en masse by the Serbs?” Not gonna happen.

They won’t discuss Bill Clinton because all of them know who the current world leaders are: they don’t have amnesia, they’re ghosts. The fic is also rated T, so it would be inappropriate to make any explicit reference to “sexual relations”. None of them play saxophone.

Julie wouldn’t think of Les Mis or Hamilton because Thomas is Regency, not French Revolution, and Kitty is Georgian, not Colonial.

Julie won’t be calling Fanny Mary Poppins because she is perpetually stuck in a white dress, doesn’t wear a hat, doesn’t own an umbrella or a purse and was not the nanny or housekeeper of Button House.

The ghosts will not discuss the marvels of modern transportation or how long it would’ve taken to cross the Atlantic on dinghy because the ghosts have seen Friends. The house irl is on a flight path. They know airplanes exist. Alison and Mike pulled up in a car.

I will probably have the phantoms and Willie talk to Pat and Julian about being from the ‘80s and ‘90s. That I will actually probably do.

The Captain will not mention FD Roosevelt because, again, they all know who the current world leaders are, and I doubt he expects a ‘90s pop punk band to have any insider knowledge on the man.

It was interesting to think of the phantoms’ grandparents having been alive during WW2. I wasn’t lying. But there is nearly nothing I can do with this information.

But above all: both sets of ghosts have already adapted to modern life. Because the shows are shorter, and meant to actually be able to fit jokes in them.

If you want to see any of this, write your own damn fic. I don’t own the concept of a JATP/BBC Ghosts crossover.

What you will not do, “consonant-vowel-consonant-vowel”-nim, is hound me on multiple accounts and then change platform to hound me again. I’m absolutely not having it.

I have never received an interaction quite like this before, and I cannot help but wonder if this is because this is my first work in the Ghosts/HH/Them There/Six Idiots/Yonderland/Bill fandom: that this is where you primarily camp out.

So it’s at this point I ask the Them There/Six Idiots fandom if they have/if they know anyone who has had a run-in with this person or thinks they may have, or if anyone perhaps even knows who this is? Maybe I’m just one of many. Maybe this is a necessary fandom evil I was unaware of.

This experience has left me royally freaked out, as one might imagine, especially since my anxiety in general has been acting up due to it being exam season. I want to thank everyone who’s read my rambles on Discord and on here and even listened to them irl and offered support from the bottom of my heart.

I’ve enabled comment moderation on the fic. I will continue to write it, and I will put exactly what I, and only what I, want in it.

Believe it or not, I wanted to do literally anything else today.

Anon: Fucking Leave Me Alone.

Update: Just reiterating: Carl is not Mimi or Lulu. Carl is a cool dude and I want to sincerely apologise for having brought him into this mess, passing judgment on his character, and making him feel like he should stop practicing English online.

#ask #anon #callout post #ig #rant #parish notice #jatp #julie and the phantoms #bbc ghosts #ghosts #fic #fanfic #ao3 #literally any information about this would be helpful #six idiots #them there #horrible histories #yonderland #bill

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onthepageoftears · 4 years

Text

Kill Your Darlings Ch. 6 (Jaskier x Assassin!Reader) || Witcher

A/N: Hello everyone! I hope you are all taking care of yourselves as usual :) Here’s another chapter for ya in the meantime of self-isolation. Enjoy!

Your comments and feedback are always encouraged and mean a lot to me!

Summary: Making a plan was so much simpler when you were alone.

Warnings: language, mentions of death/killing, bickering bickering bickering!

Words: 2,180

Please Don’t Plagiarize My Work!

The walk back to the inn was much quicker this time. You still weaved your way through alleyways and avoided people’s eyes, while trying to make sure none of the assassins from the guild were following you. The last thing you needed right now was for them to track where the bard was staying.

Because of that, you decided it would be best to avoid going through the front of the inn. It would only bring attention to yourself, and you needed to lay low and not attract any suspicious eyes. You slid past a group of men who were just entering the tavern — they were seemingly already drunk, despite it being hardly past noon. You shrugged it off and went down the quiet and slim alleyway that lay just between the inn and another building. Your eyes scanned the side of the inn; from what you remembered, the bard was on the second floor in the room all the way to the left. That meant the third window from the right lead to his room.

Though the Kingfisher Inn was one of the best you had seen, the bricks that lined the walls stuck out in different places. It was an okay building structure, but an even better building for climbing.

Without hesitation, you grabbed at the bricks and hauled yourself up the building towards the bard’s window. You moved quickly, your eyes flicking to the bricks that were sticking out enough for you to grip them. You shifted your feet so they leaned on the other window frames, using that to push yourself further up the building. Finally, you reached the third-floor window; one hand gripped the window sill while the other pushed the window slightly, testing if it was open. It was.

You rolled your eyes and pushed it further, leaving enough room for you to slide in. With one swift motion, you pushed your body up with your hands, grabbed the top of the window sill, swung your legs — then body — through the opening, and landed in the room with barely a thud.

You smiled to yourself as you looked back out the window to the drop below. Not bad. Smile still on your face, you turned to look at the room.

The room was just as messy as when you first saw it — clothes were thrown over different objects, bottles of alcohol were now nearly empty. Despite the overt messiness, the evidence of your…experience there was now gone: the chair you were once strapped to was in the far corner, the bed was neatly made. Any indication of a struggle was gone, except for the struggle of choosing what to wear.

That still seemed to be an issue for the bard, since he was sitting in a chair facing away from you, wearing only an undershirt tucked into his pants. He strummed his lute lightly, a similar tune to the one you woke up to this morning. Seemingly, he hadn’t noticed your entrance.

“Your window is open.”

It was then that he jumped halfway out of his seat. He stood up quickly with a hand to his heart, only slightly calming down when he saw you. “How did you—“ He turned his gaze from you to the window, then back again. “Gods, you’re worse than Geralt!”

You raised your eyebrows. Worse than a witcher? You took that as a compliment.

Despite the twinge of pride that coursed through your body, you kept a straight face. “Your window was open.”

“Yes, I am well aware, thank you.” He placed his lute on the table beside himself, frown still painted on his face. He shook his head slightly and deepened his frown. “How did you even get to this floor?”

“I climbed.”

The bard blinked, his look of awe soon being wiped away with one of disbelief. “You know, there is a door. Multiple, actually. They might be useful to you sometime in your life.”

“I didn’t want anyone to see me.”

“But seeing you climb three stories isn’t suspicious at all?”

You tilted your head. He had a point.

Instead of letting him feel the satisfaction, you settled on a shrug. The bard rolled his eyes and poured himself a drink, then emptied the rest of the bottle into another glass. He picked one up and held it towards you, to which you only stared at him. He shrugged, poured the one cup into the other, and chugged it.

“You know,” he said once he finished his drink, “I don’t even know your name.”

You hesitated. It wasn’t what you expected to come out of the bard’s mouth. ‘How many people have you killed’, ‘what does it feel like to murder someone’…it was usually what someone would bring up as soon as they could. But this bard wanted to know…your name?

You pursed your lips. “Does it matter?”

“Yes. I think I deserve a proper introduction with the person who tried to kill me. Twice.” He placed his glass back on the table with a thud. For a second, he stood still, eyes flicking over your face — studying you. Then, he walked over to you and stuck his hand out. “Julian Alfred Pankratz.”

A lump formed in your throat as you stared down at the bard’s hand. A proper introduction was not something you were familiar with. Your introduction was typically one that started with a fist and ended with a corpse. But for some reason, you didn’t feel the need to withhold information right now. After all, it was just a name.

“Y/N,” you said, taking his hand.

Calloused, with a strong grip. You locked eyes with the bard — Julian — and were surprised when his eyes didn’t immediately tear away from yours. Only the brave will keep an unfaltering gaze with an assassin. You expected a witcher to maybe hold the eye contact, but a bard? You couldn’t help but feel impressed.

The sound of a key in the door made both you and Julian turn, ripping the gaze you held. You immediately stepped forward, releasing your grip from his and getting ready to slide your knife from its spot on your wrist. Soon, the door was open and quickly closed behind the witcher, who turned around to face you two and immediately stopped in his tracks. As you lowered your guard, his golden eyes flicked from you, to Julian, to the now open window.

“I leave you for one minute and someone still manages to catch you off guard.”

Julian scoffed. “I wasn’t caught off guard.” He lied, “And I was writing a song.”

“The witcher is right.” You crossed your arms over your chest, turning back to the bard. “You need to be more careful. If that was any other assassin you’d be dead.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” He sat back in his chair, turning it so he could face you. “You don’t pride yourself in your ability to kill people?”

You decided to ignore his jab. In a split second, it was as if the respect you had for him disappeared into thin air.

You turned to the witcher. “My employer is going to meet with the payer and figure out what is going on. But that won’t stop other assassins from trying to finish the job.”

“They would kill me even though I’m innocent?”

“They don’t know you’re innocent.” And even I don’t. You bit your tongue. You had to admit Julian was right — Rauf should have told the whole guild of the issue so you wouldn’t have to worry about the other assassins, but you guessed he didn’t want to admit a possible mistake until he was sure. Which is why you had to keep an eye on this imbecile until Rauf got back.

“So what does that mean? Am I on lockdown until further notice?”

“Kind of. But we need to relocate somewhere safer.”

“As long as I’m with him, he’ll be fine.” The witcher leaned against the door, his scowl more prominent than before.

“And what happens when you just leave him for a minute and another assassin sneaks in the window?” The witcher’s glare barely phased you. “It’s not safe here. We need to go somewhere else, somewhere smaller.”

“I think you forgot an important part of this situation.” He turned to you with both hands in the air. “We?”

“I can’t leave you alone. Not when I know the other assassins are thinking about killing you.”

“You don’t mind staying with us?” The bard leaned forward in his seat. “You do realize we tortured you, right?”

You shrugged. “I would have done the same.”

“How reassuring.” Julian clicked his tongue. “How do I know you don’t plan to kill me whenever Geralt turns his back?”

You pursed your lips and lifted your chin slightly. “I don’t enjoy killing people who are innocent. Or, might be.”

“Where do you suggest we go?” The witcher interjected, but before you could answer, Julian spoke.

“What could be safer than an inn with witnesses everywhere?”

“Exactly my point.” You didn’t wait for either of the men to respond. “With too much of a crowd, it can be easier to eliminate a target without being caught.”

“But when you tried to kill me you brought me to my own room. Which, I’d like to point out, is pretty upsetting on its own.”

“If I didn’t do that, you wouldn’t be alive now, would you?” You quirked a brow at the bard, who stuck his bottom lip out in a pout. The fact that he didn’t protest further allowed you to take a second before speaking again.“We can’t stay in the city. A smaller area is better, somewhere there isn’t a guild too close by.”

“Like?”

“Just outside of Novigrad. There are plenty of villages we can jump from.”

Julian sat up in his chair. “No, no, no. We can't leave the city.”

“And why is that?”

“Because we just got here!”

You scoffed at the bard’s excuse, rolling your eyes as he scrambled to come up with another reason.

He snapped his fingers and pointed at you once he thought of something. “And...it would be easier to kill me in an isolated area. With no witnesses.”

You took a sharp breath in, holding onto whatever patience you had left. “Like I said, assassins don’t care if there is a crowd or not.”

“But not is easier. Not as many witnesses, not as many worries.” You opened your mouth the argue, but found yourself speechless. If you had to admit it, he had a point. To be honest, either option was bad.

But of course you wouldn’t let them think you considered it.

”So, what do you suggest, bard? We stay in the inn and wait for someone to attack you?” Just when you expected him to not have a response, to give in and admit he had no plan, he perked up in his chair.

“We can move to a different inn, under a different name. I’ll keep this room as a...a misdirect. No one will know I’m at the other inn.” You shifted your eyes to the witcher, who shared the same unconvinced look.

Noticing this, Julian jumped from his chair. “Besides, you two will be there. I trust you to be my…bodyguards. Well, I trust Geralt.”

You stifled a laugh. “Bodyguard?”

“What? It is a very sophisticated job title.”

“For who?”

“Alright.” The witcher pushed himself from his position and took a few steps closer, still keeping his proximity to the door. “We’ll stay in the city, but if anything happens, we listen to the assassin.”

You scoffed. “If anything happens, he’ll be dead.”

But at this point, neither of the men listened to you. Julian was already getting his stuff together — his stuff being the clothes littered on the floor. While the witcher quietly returned to his spot blocking the door, you shifted your gaze between the two. They were pretty much complete opposites — one almost as silent as a shadow, and the other an actual ball of nonstop noisemaking.

You supposed it was easier to go along with the bard’s plan, at least for now. You would have to keep a sharp eye out for anything strange — at the slightest suspicion, forcing them to leave the city would be your only option. But for the time being, letting the bard think he was in control might be for the best.

You made your way over to the witcher, hoping it would signify the fact that you were ready to leave. You doubted that would be happening anytime soon — Julian continued picking up clothes from the floor at a leisurely pace, hanging each one over his arm with surprising delicacy.

“Not going to take the window this time?”

You snorted, only turning to look at the witcher from the corner of your eye, “Guess not.” You nodded to the bard, who was now mumbling to himself between random hums. “Is he always—“

“You’ll get used to it.”

———————————————————————————————————

Let me know your thoughts :)

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cilliansaccent · 4 years

Text

Class of Temptation - CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Leave a like, reblog or comment below to show your support and love! Enjoy…

PLEASE READ:

No mention of Cillian’s true family or relatives. All names are made up.

Cillian will act very differently compared to the Cillian we know.

This is a TEACHER x STUDENT fanfiction, it’s going to be kinky, dirty, nasty and extremely TABOO!

I will write whenever the mood grabs me, so I apologise if there are long breaks between chapters :)

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Background: Tessa is a twenty-three-year-old model from a broken-up family, living in London with her best friend and starting a course on Drama and Theatre. Though, when she gets closer to the super hot Mr Murphy who is her much older teacher, there is a battle of lust and love between them. They’ll have to figure out what to do with their tight relationship as other issues begin to rise and nip at their heels…

Word Count: 4,978

!!Warnings!!: Mention of sex before foreplay and whatnot at the end.

Chapter Name: My Pet

Brief Chapter Outline: Back to class, Tessa finds out that some of her classmates had attended the party Esther threw and some embarrassing videos. She is ready to knock some teeth out before it converts to murder when she hears two certain people together in a classroom after hours... Then it leads to her discovering something.

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Tessa knew she was screwed today. She would have to come to class and tell Cillian why she had not uploaded her assignment and she was so not looking forward to it. It was a fair chunk of her grade. She hoped the end of term assignment would boost her up, she was doing well in her other subjects for the course though.

"Why do you even bother putting make-up on?" Elijah asked, he was still naked in her bed and watched her.

"I need to look good. Happens when you are a female model." She smiled. She was seated at her table and applying lipstick on.

"I guess that's true." He laid back on his back, "Got work today. I should go home..." He trailed off.

"You can stay here as long as you want." She mused as she stood up and pulled off her dressing gown. She pulled on her thong and a simple black bodysuit, high waist black jeans and a delicate mesh sparkly top. She braided back her hair and tugged on a pair of white sneakers.

"Yeah I could but I need the money..." he let out a loud dramatic sigh.

"Aw, poor baby." She laughed as she sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over him, "Message me after you finish work?"

"I will. Want me to come over tonight?" He leaned up and kissed her chin gently.

"You can come over whenever you want." She played with a curl of his hair and smiled.

"Sweet. I'll make sure I climb up on the balcony and sneak through." He teased as he sat up and had a hand on her thigh, his thumb rubbing back and forth.

"Such a romantic. But you might hurt yourself and I don't want that." She reached out and touched his shoulders and ran her hands down his arms.

"Yeah, I guess I can't do that then. I'll just give you a call after work and see where you are at." He nodded.

"Alright. I gotta go now. I'll see you later. Love you." She kissed his cheek, leaving red lipstick behind and headed out. She drove to her uni, parked and headed up. Her nerves kicked in and she started to stress, how the fuck was she going to do this? She knew Cillian was kind and caring but when it came to work not being handed in he was quite hard about it.

She slipped into class with everyone else and took her spot next to Julian who was grim looking.

"You good?" She asked her best friend. He had kept his messages short and brief these past few days.

"Yeah. Peachy." He said giving her a sidelong look before he resumed reading.

She nodded and kept quiet. People came in and some stopped by to tell her this:

"Hey, crazy party on Wednesday night. Thanks for the invite."

"Yo, can't believe you kicked us out! You are so fucking crazy girl!"

"Oh my god," Victoria smirked as she stood in front of her desk as the rest of the group headed to their table. "That sex party at your apartment was so good. I had such a pleasurable night. Your toys were such an abundance, you love a lot of anal though. And BDSM."

Cillian had just walked in and heard what Victoria said to Tessa and only cleared his throat. "Victoria please sit. Class will start." He said with a stern tone.

Victoria laughed and went to go sit as Tessa sat there red-faced. The whole class heard it. Julian let out a soft choke as he glanced at Tessa.

"Sex party?" He whispered.

"Not my idea nor did I approve of such shit. Esther's fault." Tessa muttered.

"Right. I have to show you something after this." He said.

Tessa only grew more stressed.

"I have already begun going through the assignments and luckily enough I've finished them. I must say I am very happy with the work you guys have produced. I'm not the one to have favourites but... I do love the details and the extensive research you all have done. Well-done." Cillian beamed from his desk. "But I do want to express my admiration to Sofia who has done an exceptional job on her report. I will send you all a copy of her work so you may have it as a reference for how you can sort out your reports or for any type of assignment that requires research and using examples and paraphrasing. I thank you all for a pleasant read." Everyone clapped for Sofia who was sticking her nose up and enjoying the attention greatly.

She gave Tessa a cold and sly smirk before her eyes returned to Cillian, all just sex and lust in her eyes.

Tessa wanted to gag and she sunk further into her chair, her heartfelt like shattering as she heard the praise Cillian gave to the stupid bitch. No way was his dislike for her had to have changed so fast, she knew he hated her and how she always came on to him so strongly even in front of everyone. It made her want to rip her eyes out.

Class continued on as per usual and she worked on her script with Julian. She learned that Julian's parents were in town and he wasn't in a good mood as they were the ones who kicked him out of their home when he came out. He was to attend his sister's graduation and had to deal a night worth of shit from his parents. Tessa offered him advice and a safe place in her apartment if he needed a friendly face. He accepted it.

When class was over and people milled around Cillian to received back their marks, Sofia waltzed over and giggled, "Happy I got a great grade? Cillian is so all over me about it. I kinda thought you would've beaten me but hey, look at that. The queen arises higher than her dirty servants." She laughed, "Also, Victoria had such a blast. The videos I've seen really makes me question whether you are a disgusting freak too. Never seen so much leather in once place and such exotic creepy looking toys. You are so fucked in the head." She whispered and left Tessa boiling in her own anger.

"Shit." Julian sat there and saw Tessa watch Sofia as if she was about to rip her head off.

"Videos?" Tessa looked at Julian.

"That is the thing I wanted to tell you about. It's all over Facebook and Instagram." He took out his phone and showed it to her especially one where Victoria and some random two girls and guys were showcasing Tessa's wardrobe and the various sex items she had. Her name wasn't mentioned but Tessa had keen-eyed friends who could pinpoint her clothing and her bedroom.

"I'm gonna fucking kill her." She knew there was no chance those videos would disappear. Forever online.

"What are you gonna do?" Julian asked as he packed up his stuff.

"Nothing. I can't do anything," She whispered as she looked up, Cillian was saying good-bye to the last few students.

"You sure? You could do something." Julian frowned.

"Yeah? Like what? There isn't anything I can do, Julian. What happened has happened." She said.

"What is going on?" Cillian had come over and heard the discussion.

"Nothing," Tessa said quickly as she shoved her stuff into her bag.

Julian pressed his lips together, "I guess I'll see you later." He said and left her alone.

"What videos, Tessa? I've been hearing whispering all class about some... Party you held." Cillian was expecting an answer and he would get one from her. He wasn't too happy with her.

"I held no such party. My roommate held one without my knowledge. House was trashed. I had to clean, throw things out and buy everything again." She pulled her bag on her shoulder. "Now I want to go. I have no time in telling you anything." She turned to go.

"Now, hold up, Tess. What is this aggression suddenly? Why are you acting like this?" Cillian grabbed her arm.

She snatched her arm back and glared at him, "Cause I'm an actor and I'll behave in whatever way I want." She bit back.

Cillian crossed his arms, "You are no such actor. You are behaving like a child and ignored my questions today."

"And Sofia is any fucking better than me?" Oh, God, she was fuming. How dare he call her a child?

"Sofia has become a very respectful girl these past few weeks with my help on aiding her. She's really outshone herself despite her many doubts." Cillian stood his ground. But he knew he wished it would've been the opposite and for Tessa to be the best than that... Skank.

Tessa scoffed and let out an emotionless laugh, "Wow... You... Wow. And I thought you were smarter than this, Cillian. Didn't think fake tits and botox pumped face was what you liked. Maybe I should do the same? Pump my lips till they're like balloons, my tits heavier than a fucking elephant and take out part of my spine so I can snap forward to expose my plastic ass? Is that what it takes you to get your attention?" Her words were spilling out without a filter and she had no way to stop them. She hated the fact that he took so much interest in Sofia and he had private lessons with her. Despite not wanting to talk to him about her life, she enjoyed his gentle spirit and kind eyes. Not once did Elijah came to mind when she had her thoughts on Cillian.

Cillian was shocked to hear those words from Tessa. He only kept his attention on Sofia because... Because he wanted to get Tessa out of his head. The beautiful girl before him enraptured him so fast all he could think was taking her over his desk. And the tight clothing she always wore... Fuck.

"No words, huh? Damn. Your standards are so low, Cillian. I don't want no more lessons with you, I don't need them." Tessa stepped back.

"We need to discuss your assignment you failed to upload. You will come to my office at four this afternoon." He pulled his brain in and go back to teacher mode.

"Yeah. Sure. Fine." She rolled her eyes and stalked out of the room, feeling so much anger she wanted to stab something. But instead, she went for the music room that the music club had owned for themselves. Anyone part of the club could come in here. She was glad no one was here and she pulled out the cello and lost herself into the music.

Cillian was heartbroken when she left. He had no explanation to her about why he took an interest in Sofia. He couldn't just tell her he wanted her in ways that could cost him his job... But fuck, he WAS doing Sofia... What made the difference? Oh, right, he fucked Sofia so he could rid the thoughts of wanting to fuck Tessa. Fuck. He needs to pull himself together and get his damn morals right. He had to end it with Sofia. No more of this stupid shit. Today he would do it when she would come to him.

It came to the end of the day and Tessa had to work herself up to walk towards the office building. She really did not want to talk to Cillian or be near him other than be in class and do her work. It was clear she failed and she didn't want to hear it again. She already got an email. She ran a hand over her throat, then down her shoulder, a thing she would do if she was nervous. She paced back and forth in the hallway.

"Just go. Listen. Agree or disagree on whatever shit he has to say." She muttered to herself, "Then leave. Easy." After a few more minutes of hyping herself up, she headed down the hall past many classrooms.

But there was a sound like a laugh or something spiked her interest. She paused and listened closely... Another sound, a female sigh followed by what was like a... Moan? But it was too soft to really pick out what it was so she slowly backtracked to a room. She stopped in front of a door and could hear the sound of shuffling clothes and another soft sound, definitely a moan. She wondered if it was just some students who wanted to have some risky sex. But no, the next words made her feel like someone shot her.

"Mm, Cillian..." The female voice was none other than Sofia.

Tessa was still as she listened further, she could hear the familiar sounds when someone was thrusting, the creak of the table, the soft grunts of a man, and the sounds of skin to skin. He was going at it and Sofia was clearly trying to hold back her moans. But some loud ones did escape.

But he couldn't... No way. No way would he let Sofia get into his pants. He hated her. Did he not? Jealously slammed into her before she could fight it back. She didn't believe Sofia would do this... She heard the pair get close to their peak and Cillian let out a soft grunt as he finished up.

"Oh... Wow... That was a good one. I like it when you take me hard. Treating me for how good I did today?" She purred.

Shuffling of clothing, "No. I was not. This will be the last time, Sofia. No more." Cillian said with a hard tone.

"Liar. You said that last time and we've fucked like ten times now. You will always come back to me, babe. You like these tits and my tight pussy. I didn't get that surgery for nothing." She huffed.

Tessa wanted to gag but she continued to listen.

"I'm being serious, Sofia. Enough of this. I don't want it anymore." Cillian came by the door and Tessa tensed but he walked away. "You need to stop."

Sofia laughed, "Yeah, yeah. Come on Cillian. I know you love it. Besides, how else will you get that other bitch out of your thoughts?"

Now Tessa was very curious.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Cillian hissed and it sounded like Sofia came close to him.

"It's so fucking obvious. You watch that little skank every time in class. You've moaned her damn name, 'Oh Tessa!' into my ear four times now. Even just then you did it." Sofia said with a low purr.

Tessa couldn't believe that no way would Cillian...

"It's a mistake. Just like we are." Cillian replied.

"Again. You lie. You want her so badly but she's got no balls to ask you for that. Only I do. I mean, I am a bit pissed you think about her instead of me, but at least I get to ride your cock. Also, you won't have her any time soon, she's got a boyfriend. So, you are stuck with me." She giggled. "So, same time tomorrow? I'll wear your favourite panties."

Tessa stepped back from the door and walked away hastily, not wanting to listen any further. Cillian wanted her? Then why was he with Sofia? Was it really true he liked his girls to be naughty? To have the balls to approach him? Sofia just said that. He was calling it quits with Sofia and Tessa hoped he would stick to his word... Maybe... Just maybe...

She shook her head. She was so not thinking right. To try and get Cillian's sole attention on her? It made her aroused. She had thoughts the moment she saw him and she had caught his gaze on her many times, saw the heat and passion. She figured his wanting for her was true. Leaning against the elevator wall she had to come to a conclusion. Should she risk it and make an attempt? Or should she just forget about it all and spend a happy life with Elijah who had shown so many good qualities towards her?

Tess waited in the foyer, standing beside the window and watched the grey sky. Cillian came up eventually and looked over, "Hey, Tess. Sorry for the delay."

She looked over but didn't reply and gave him a curt smile. He guided her to his office and she sat down as he closed the door. She crossed her leg and sat with her arms loosely crossed in her lap as she kept her eyes downward as he sat down with a soft grunt.

He let in a breath and a short sigh, "I'm glad you could come here, Tessa." He said, "I can see you don't want to do this but we must."

"Let's make it quick, hm? I have no time to sit here and be reminded of being a failure." She said as she looked up, keeping her face neutral. Though she could not get the images out of Sofia all over him.

Cillian eased back in his chair in a low slouch, one arm supporting his weight as the other flicked a pen between his fingers.

Fingers that would be inside Sofia.

Tessa only got angrier.

Cillian could see that emotion in her eyes. He wondered why was she so pent up. "Fine. Well, I can skip the whole you not posting your assignment. Can I ask why?"

"My laptop was destroyed from a sex party my roommate hosted." Tessa said without hesitation, "And before you say it, yes, I know. I'm the dumbass who didn't save a second copy or somewhere else."

Cillian was totally dumbfounded, the aggression was pouring through her words and the way she sat. But holy fuck that look on her face... He was turned on. He gritted his teeth and leaned forward, "What is wrong with you Tessa? And don't give me a bullshit response. I know something is up." He snapped back. If she wanted to be like this he would give it right back to her, fuck being her teacher now.

Tessa leaned forward too, all she could see were those lovely lips upon Sofia's, his hands roaming her body and drawing her closer, "Nothing is fucking wrong with me. I'm the most okay person on this planet. Now, tell me I've failed so I can go." She said.

"What is it with you and constantly wanting to be degraded like this?" Cillian asked, "Huh? I cannot fathom such a beautiful girl like you to be beaten down like this. You are not a failure, Tessa. I can help you with this, look I can make an exception and give you until the end of this week to do the assignment. I've spoken to the board and I truly believe you are capable of so much." His voice lowered and he was gentler on her now.

Tessa frowned and looked away, clenching and releasing her hands in her lap. Cillian knelt before her now, his expression placid, "I want to know what I did to make you act like this." Cillian slipped his hand in hers.

She bit her lip and pulled her hand back, "I thank you for giving me an extra week. I will make you proud." She stood suddenly and he stood too.

"You already do, Tess. With your weekly work and good attention during class and moderate activeness to class, the discussion is wonderful. I can't ask you to do anymore. So please, tell me what have I done? Did I do something?"

Tessa wanted to tell him how angry she was that he was doing Sofia as she glared at him, "Why do you care?" She asked instead.

"I care-" He was at a loss for words, "I-" His brows furrowed as he looked at her. "It's because-"

The words fell out of her before she could bite them back, "Because you're fucking someone else."

Cillian stepped back as if the words slapped him, "What are you talking about?"

She rolled her eyes and scoffed, "Whispers tell me." Of course, Sofia wasn't in all her classes but the other girls were and she had caught a whiff of it today. And the fact she saw it unfold before her in that classroom to told her as much.

He shook his head, "Rumours are dangerous Tess-"

"I saw it." She said with a dead look, her tone matching it.

"S-Saw it?" Cillian whispered, "You must be mistaken. I am not like that, Tessa."

"I like it when you take me hard," Tessa did her best impression of Sofia and Cillian seemed to lose colour to his face. "Didn't actually see it but I heard it. Walked by the classroom and heard it all." She held his gaze.

Cillian tried to recover and shot back, "And why do you care? Is this what you are mad about?"

She scrunched up her nose, "No, gross. Why would I be jealous of some fake bitch? At least I got some real shit and not some plastic crap shoved into my body." She rolled her eyes. "You do whoever you like, Cillian. You like em with some balls to them. Plastic ones, it seems." She picked up her bag, "Anyway. Not my problem." Hurt was coursing through her and all she wanted was him for herself. "I'll get the assignment done-" She was pinned against the wall beside the door and Cillian was extremely close to her face.

"It is your problem because you don't like who I fuck." He growled, his lips mere inches from hers.

"It is not, you dumbass. Why should I care? I don't own you." She bit back.

"It is. I know you want me. You think I'm blind to your gaze? I can see it right now you want me. I will admit I want you to, I don't want Sofia. I never did." His hands moved from her shoulders to her waist and he closed that gap between their bodies as their hips came together.

She felt a hard push against her crotch and bit back a moan, "Then why do you hurt me like this? Why must you fuck her?" She whispered as she gripped his arms.

"Because I-I wanted you so badly that I couldn't get you out of my head. All I could think is about you." He pressed his forehead to hers. Her heart fluttered at the words and the truth he spoke so clearly. "I used her to get you out of my head cause I did not wish to hurt you if things went wayward with us. But God... I'm an idiot. I should've... Approached you or said something. It might've ruined our relationship if you denied me but God... I should've taken that chance." He whispered intimately to her.

She was feeling all sort of things, a slam of emotions rolling through her and she leaned forward and kissed him softly. She felt his hesitation and pulled back, looking at him. "I- Forgive me-"

His lips came crashing back down on hers and they kissed hard and desperate. It was messy as teeth and tongues clashed, her fingers diving into his hair as his arms locked around her body and there was no room between them. She felt her leg being lifted and held to his waist, and she felt his driving hips into hers and the promise of something that leads to no clothing. She let out a moan as his hand came up to fondle her breast as his head dipped to her neck again and his mouth leaving a trail of heated kisses to her flushed skin. He then pulled out that mesh top and pulled it over her head and threw it aside alongside his jumper. He watched how Tessa worked to undo his tie and then unbutton his shirt.

Yes, He thought. He would finally claim her, have her perfect body under his. He chuckled when she pushed open his shirt and leaned in kissing his neck and down to his chest, her fingers brushing along his slides to the belt buckle of his pants. He let out a soft moan when she gave his nipple a teasing suck and came back to his lips.

"Like that?" She murmured and kissed him.

"Mhm." He pushed her back against the wall and saw the excitement in her eyes. "You like to be dominated?"

"I do. I'm your little pet to play with." She licked her lips as he attacked her neck again and kissed down to the neckline of the bodysuit she wore.

"My pet." He murmured with a smirk, "I like that. And what name would you call me?" He pulled down the thin shoulder straps and the neckline under her perfect breasts. They were absolutely perfect, bigger than a handful. Much bigger. But at least they were real.

Tessa loved that heated gaze on her bare chest, and she arched her back for him to really show off her assets. "Like what you see, sir?" She bit her bottom lip feeling his hands rest on her waist and slowly move up to just under her arms and move across to cover her breasts. She let out a soft moan.

"I love it." He rasped, "Love these nipple piercings. What if I did this..." He grabbed one and tugged on it.

Tessa covered her mouth and let out a soft whimper, her hips snapping forward. "Ah!"

"Ah, sensitive. Perfect." He leaned in and began to suck on one, rolling it over his tongue and teeth as he let his hand slide down the flat surface of her stomach and force its way between her jeans and her body. He felt her soaking core and her body trembled-

"Mr Murphy! I need to have a chat with you about one of the assignments you have marked. It concerns me." A woman called from the door as she knocked.

Cillian let out a soft curse, "Uhm... Okay. Give me a moment. Just with a student." He called out as he pulled his hand out-

Tessa gripped it and pushed it back in, "Touch me. Just for a quick moment." She whispered and began to rock her hips, needing to cum so badly from all the touching and kissing he gave her.

"I can't- Oh god." He mouthed and had her back against the wall and fingered her clit fast, feeling her grip on his shoulders tightened.

"Mr Murphy, how long?" The woman seemed impatient.

"One minute! Please." He replied as he pushed two fingers into Tessa, now fingering her fast and hard as her body rocked and trembled, he could feel how tight her walls were. She was so close.

"I am on a tight schedule, Mr Murphy." The woman urged just as Tessa made an 'O' face and let out soft delicate whimpers against his shoulder as she released over his hand. He stayed like that for a moment before he had to pull away. He looked at his fingers and his cock hardened before his eyes widened... He had come as well with her. He felt the wetness at his jeans and they both glanced down.

Tessa giggled and took his hand, cleaning his fingers by sucking on them and used her tongue. She stepped back and fixed her bodysuit as he shrugged on his jumper as he had no time when the door opened.

He had just thrown his shirt over the table as he made his way back to the chair to sit when the door swung opened, the female teacher glanced at the pair, "Sorry to intrude so rudely but this is of concern."

Tessa smiled as she slung her bag over her back, clutching her coat with her sparkly shirt underneath it, "That is okay. We are done here for today." She said.

"No worries. I just want to remind you of uhm... Your lipstick is... All over the place." When the woman had her eyes on Tessa, Cillian had ducked his head behind the desk to clean off his lips with a handy wet wipe he had and his neck before he sat up.

"I got some wet wipes." He offered a packet to Tessa.

"Thanks." Tessa smiled and took one, meeting his eyes and gave him a wink and mouthed, 'This isn't over yet' before she wiped her lips carefully.

"Poor girl, you didn't offer her earlier?" The woman scoffed as Tessa left them, shutting the door behind her. Once she was in the elevator, out of the Uni and in her car she sat there for a good moment. Eyes shut and just... Coming down from all of that happened in the office of her damn drama teacher. Was this just another one of her hot dreams? She reached between her legs and pulled her hand out. Wet as fuck. Not dreaming. He had made her cum for real. She licked them clean as she pulled on her sparkly top and her coat as she was cold but still felt hot in certain areas.

Cillian made her cum.

For real.

He kissed her, touched her breasts, fingered her...

Holy fuck.

She felt her phone ring and she jumped from her occupied thoughts. It was Elijah when she picked up. Fuck. And yet... She felt no guilt as she organised a movie night for tonight at her place. No guilt when she promised him an exciting night. And definitely, no guilt when she met him, kissed him and let him fuck her body when they got bored with the movie they watched in her room.

What the fuck has she gotten herself into?

#cillian murphy #thomas shelby #peaky blinders #teacher x student #fanfiction #cillian murphy fanfic

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itstheendofthegoddamnworld · 5 years

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Silver In The Sea (Julian Devorak! Pirate x Mermaid! Reader)

Summary: A year into his travels at sea, Julian Devorak is faced with the highs and lows of sailing across the southern sea; facing the dangers that come with it. As a physician, he is given many opportunities to live out the days in surviving for himself - especially against many things that want him dead.

Notes: I will try to get the character of Julian as best as I can. Mentions of blood, injury, near-drowning experiences. Julian likes to talk his way out of everything, nearly costing him to lose his tongue.

SUPPORT ME ON A03, MY USERNAME THE SAME AS HERE!!

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Silver In The Sea Prologue (Storms Swell)

The winds howled and blew with defiance, the chaos that swirled and twisted the world around it into its grasp; on set for destruction.

A storm bigger than the ones ever seen across the southern sea had set its course for havoc, creating an off-balance for all those that were in its way.

Screams and shouts for lack of order could barely be heard through the commotion and screams of the sea's revenge, and Julian's ears rang like bells playing its heavy toll in his mind.

He had heard those bells before, setting off the unknown memories of hearing the mark for dread: a dead monarch, a city under siege, he had been there for many.

Through the eye of the storm, the rain slashed and cut through men like they were fishes ready for gutting, and Julian had never seen such a storm so bad in the time he had been sailing for new adventures.

Eliana's Song - named after one of the old King's daughters aeons ago- was a highly treasured and hefty vessel; with high sails and large a hull wider than any of the other spice ships he had seen.

She was a mighty vessel, able to block off attacks and last through years without being destroyed from the weather, but Julian thought that the Gods must've been joking and acting cruelly for this day to finally see to both to bring it down. They were being under attack by both weather and men from another ship; looking to steal and kill and sink her to a watery grave.

How shameful. Julian thought, ducking as a collision from the pirate's cannon caved into the right side of the ship. I was wanting to see this beauty come back into port in the near summer.

"Devorak, you're needed." The quartermaster spoke over the screams that definitely told him that someone was injured: a man screaming more than just bloody murder. Julian didn't need to reply, stepping out with one weary look into the open as he ran with his supplies into the firing range.

The rain poured and nearly sent him flying to the ground, but he managed to plant himself in time to miss a rumble from the bowels of the vessel, sending over men to the floor.

"Hold on, old friend, stay with us." Julian's voice was borderline on calm for the entire situation, kneeled before the man as the rain-soaked and washed the injurer's blood away.

He didn't know why he was all so positive in this situation, he was risking his life for a man who already had his right foot blown off, laying in his own blood and those of his crew.

He had seen many deaths before, many during a crisis like this: failing to save another's life when he thought so little of his own. It made him wonder why he was so selfless, for being an unlicensed doctor was there to help others.

Following procedures like clockwork, Julian shut the man up with some cloth that he had ripped from his shirt, stuffing it in his mouth as he tried to concentrate over the sounds of other dying men and cannons flying in all directions.

He assessed his wound, using as much cloth to stop the bleeding, blood already seeping in through it and staining his gloved hands.

The smell of ash was strong in the air, and Julian had grown used to the smell of bodies around him but never was a smell so foul as a body caught on fire.

He looked over, the shouts of his name being called around him-- no- screaming at him to get on with helping another with lesser injuries. "He's a dead man." He had heard so often, he could know when it would be said.

Julian looked to the man as he was slowly succumbing to blood loss, and he moved on, sending a silent prayer to him as he crawled hands and knees through blood, guts and corpses. There was no time to pray for the dead, not like this. He thought.

"Sir, there are men needing help down in the gallery, shall I attend to them?" Julian leaned into a fallen piece of the mass, leant with the First Mate.

"They'll be dead before the sun even rises Devorak. Stay on deck and above. I'm not going to lose an idiot of a doctor like you. The Gods may be cruel, but they will be crueller if they take you with them."

Julian would've laughed at the comment, or perhaps compliment, laughter yet mirthless in the situation. "When this is over, I'll buy you a drink, how does that sound Doctor? Just to laugh and say we survived a shipwreck and pirate onslaught."

"A pint of salty bitters will suffice me, Sir." Julian had missed the taste of it, trying to remember when he had had it last. At 2 am in a pub during his time training. All there was on board was salty crackers and warmed rum lying in the sun, and that didn't serve him to satisfaction at all.

"Gods you may outrun your damn mouth, but one would have to be a half-wit to know of your skills." Praised the quartermaster, an unknown conviction and feeling to know what to mean of it.

A crash from the far end of the ship caught their attention, smoke rising as Julian thought the deck was beginning to feel unbelievably hot.

"Water is coming in from the hull Sir!" The physician heard from who knew where, as the vessel groaned with the knowledge of its end.

"Then let's give the fuckers a fight then! Do not cease fire!"

The sky cracked with a fire above and Julian saw how much it lit up the entire dark sky. A flash of the neighbouring vessel attacking them, smoke filling his lungs as well as sea salt.

He wasn't believing he was dying today, oh no-- Eliana's Song was a strong one, and she wouldn't go down without a fight. Another crash and a churn of something came from both ends, and Julian groaned with it. "Sir, most of our cannons have been destroyed or sunken!"

"Prepare to evacuate ship! She's a goner, gentlemen. Prepare the dinghy."

Rain and sea salt scratched at the side of Julian's face, as he blinked back the saltiness from his grey eye. He wasn't crying - the last time he believed he cried was when he was saying farewell to Pasha, and she had cried an ocean for him that day. So much so that he had cried with her in their embrace goodbye as she begged him not to leave:

"Don't leave me Ilya, please."

Only the Gods knew how long ago he had seen her last: way when he was setting off to begin a career as a doctor in Prakra when he was saying goodbye to his humble town of Nevivon.

They had both been young, too young to know of the consequences to life and what trauma would be followed. She had been young but would she recognised him now? Smiling brightly as he made his way back to port and hug and cry when they saw each other?

He had forgotten of the past life he once lived, where he lived with Pasha and they were both happy. But Julian wanted more to life and he wished to not look back, or else he would become lost.

A smiling younger sister is who I want to see again. He thought glumly, as the carnage continued to ensue around him. I'm not going to die today, not until I see her, or else I've failed her and me.

He toppled over abruptly when another cannonball hit the middle, a spray of bodies flying from the drastic hit as more things caught on fire.

Men were evacuating, some hoping that the sea would save them as they jumped overboard. There was a deafening cry from all around him, and Julian wished he had been smarter than to risk his life jumping overboard too.

He could hear his name being shouted at from those around him, those calling him for his aid, others screeching for him to get his dramatic hind off the now-sinking ship. He was useless to both he thought, standing to his height as he looked around with one of his good eyes.

The final strike from either the lightning or from the ramming ship was enough to cease the vessel's journey to beneath the waves, as she cracked merely in two if those could witness it from afar.

Her entire vessel shook, sending men over the rails as they were trying to get as many on the dinghy as possible. If Julian was to survive this, he was not thinking in Hell he would be surrounded by other men on a small crowded boat.

Even looking down, the waters were blackened, as if Hell was awaiting for every crew member and himself. He hesitated for a second before the ground split just below his feet.

An opening of an opportunity arose and Julian took it, leaping down as the gap grew larger and larger, water swelling into the cracks as men fell and burned. The fall was long and Julian could hear those of the crashing waves waiting to meet him as he landed, the cold taking over his body when it hit him.

He crashed beneath the waves in a frantic crawl, kicking and pushing as all he could see beneath the waves was darkness and sinking bodies.

There was debris falling in, large pieces of wood that he had to be careful of as he finally breached the surface, gasping as if it had been his first intake of breath in a long time.

Men are dying up there, and here I am, being a coward, not dying beside them. He thought, trying to attempt to swim as he watched in horror, the dingy that was coming down with the ropes caught fire, toppling those inside backwards as they fell into the water, crashing and not resurfacing.

He gulped wiping at his brow as he looked around him. A sea for a group of innocent men, not ready to die in the graveyard of water below.

"Oh gods, the mast! Watch out!" Julian gaped in horror as he stared up into the sky, the largest mast was caught alit with everything else, titling so closed off as the flames caught it to tilt.

The dread was something that made Julian Devorak's body kick into overdrive, scrambling to kick at all his long limbs as the mast grew exponentially closer and closer as it fell like a lead weight.

The doctor made a descent under, trying to pull his long body down and down as far as he could get himself to go, his head looking up to see just in time the massive piece to come crashing with a roar in the sea, sinking quicker than Julian could expect.

A piece snagged onto the corner of his shirt, and Julian would've groaned in the discomfort and pain when a long slash came to the back his lower back, his shirt ripping as he struggled to release himself.

No, I will not die. His mind was in two parts, tugging at his conscious as he was growing desperately short of breath the longer he was down there. His mind always went back to a smiling Pasha, awaiting him to see him, but her smile dropping quicker when there was no sign of him getting off.

He finally released himself from the piece of broken wood, his lungs feeling as if they had caught fire as he tiredly carried his body to the surface. His eye stung with salt, his throat burning as he spluttered and coughed.

"Anyone alive! Help me! Can anyone hear me?" His voice called over the water as the dying sounds of men quietened. Eliana's Song cried a final woeful tune as she began to sink beneath the black waves.

Julian gritted his teeth, kicking as he grabbed a piece of debris to use as a float, his hand going back and past the open skin, grunting in surprise as to what when he pulled back was blood stained on his fingers.

Oh, Gods. He barely panicked, but seeing himself injured gravely was one that made him think to what could be in the water awaiting him with an empty tomb for himself.

The sea was known for sharks and sometimes krakens- men were always creative in thinking of tales of the large creatures that could pull ships over and under. Sea dragons that belonged more in the northern sea, with breath colder than hot, able to freeze over a vessel on the spot.

It wasn't the krakens or the sea dragons that worried him- he had heard story after story told to him and he grew almost bored from them.

He looked down and surrounding him, and the black water had a reddish tint to it, staining his open and cut shirt as he tried to stay awake even when he knew he wasn't tried in that way.

He eventually decided it was better to try and see how far possibly he could've been from land, but there was no islands nor anything but open dark water surrounding him, the sky with litters of stars pouring in in his sight.

He blinked slowly, just staring up into the night sky with no thoughts coming to mind than to just make it out alive. Julian was desperately floating, his head pounding with an unknown headache that was appearing. He blamed it on the rum that night before the attack.

His head bobbing up and down in the water, as he thought maybe it was better to see whether he should let go. He was leagues away from land, with possible injuries that could get infected without proper treatment. He smiled a pained smile, chuckling at how worthless he felt in this moment.

Pasha... I'm sorry. He succumbed, his head falling beneath the waves as he sunk and sunk and sunk.

He waited for his death, blinking with red eyes in the water as he thought of how his sister would find out of the news, her reaction and whether she would mourn like how he would believe or not she would for him.

Movement caught him to turn, through the shadowy and onyx abyss, something silver flashed in his peripheral vision. So sharks did exist, excellent. He would've laughed at that moment as he was finding it harder and harder to breathe. Be gentle to me, and don't ruin my face to recognition, so they can at least bury me in a marked grave.

He shut his eye, blinking in and out of consciousness, and that night, Julian Devorak thought he had died. What awaited him in a dream-like euphoric state was a hangman that awaited with a noose in its grip.

"Traitor, murderer, and you call yourself a doctor. You practise and play roulette with other's lives instead of helping them."

He was swallowed into death's gullet, ravens and crows with humanoid features awaiting him, like the clawed and scratched at his flesh, screaming for him to die. "Awaits your truth worthy doctor. A special place in Hell for you."

He was burned, cut apart and eaten limb by limb as he watched, but he thought of it all as a worthy punishment. All for the crimes and tests that he failed in succeeding. All those lives, men who deserved a better chance at surviving. He was given chance after chance to help someone, and only did he get one out of a thousand casualties that lived.

When he had awoken, he wasn't in some seventh Hell, nor some version of it as punishment. He wasn't even in the sea anyone, drowning slowly as he waited to be feasted on by sharks.

He had awoken to a blinding light in his eye, causing him to grow in confusion and pain; a headache worse than any of the hangovers he had experienced before. He adjusted to the pain, questions tumbling through his head to make him question how the hell he ended up out of the water and was not in fact dead.

Was this some afterlife or reality he knew of already? He couldn't decide, even when everything he touched felt so real. There was warm sand beneath him, burning his flesh pink and stinging his back, almost forgetting about the wound that seemed so real.

There was pain everywhere in his body, and when he stretched to prop himself up, he found himself surrounded by a white beach, water and tropic trees surrounding in the middle.

He had found himself onto an island, but wait? It had seemed that he was miles out from land, and unless he was loopy from blood loss or he had managed to swim unconscious, there was no believing he had managed to do this whilst badly injured.

They won't believe this story when I tell them this in pubs. He groaned silently, the clear blue water stretched and never-ending, nothing there for him to see. If I manage to make it back.

Standing up took longer than he expected, his legs were congealed like jelly, replacing his bones with paper as he crashed into the sand below on his first step. His entire body feels like it was on fire; drenched in flames that he couldn't get out from.

Tired grunts and moans came the back of Julian's throat, a moment to press his hand to the wound on his back. From the feel of it, it didn't seem too deep, but it was longer than he expected, managing to get him from all the way around just to the beginning of the band of his trousers.

When he pulled his hand back, his fingers were slick with fresh blood.

I've survived sieges and attacks, seen more dead than those alive. I've lived with pirates who threatened me with my own life and head. He told himself. A little blood will not kill me.

But he had to begin healing said wound, or else it could worsen and bring his health to something more life-threatening. Staggering halfway as best as he could on his feet then crawling, Julian dragged himself through the sand towards the edge of the water, clear and cold it felt as if it was cleansing his soul.

Step by step, he took it slow, knowing already of the even further pain he would feel once the water got to waist depth. But he thought of the outcome if he didn't as he lowered himself as the saltwater met the wound.

No amount of pain could amount to what he was experiencing, and now he understood what his patients felt when they were in pain. He barked out a laugh, airy as he hissed through his teeth.

For some reason, the pain made him think to Asra; the magician he knew from the years working in medicine before going off to explore. He would call me some sadistic bastard for liking the pain so much. He huffed, trying to shake his head away from the thought.

A splash came from behind him, as Julian wadded through the water to turn, looking outward towards the deep end. The water grew murkier from what he could see, and he didn't know what was possible out there watching.

Another splash came, and he squinted, a flash of clear silver slithered like a snake through the abyss of the water, not even that far from him.

He never got out of the sea as quick as that ever before.

For his wound, he tried to find simple things, for there were no balms to put into the wounds, but the saltwater had helped in cleaning it out thoroughly. He ended up gathering wet seaweed and wrapping it heavily around his entire waist.

By the time Julian walked back to the shore, his clothes were soaked, heavy and clung to him and the sun was setting low on the horizon. He would have to make a fire quickly before he caught a chill.

Looking for sticks and materials to start a fire was harder than he realised, and he rethought his career ideas in becoming a survivalist rather than a doctor. Stripping out of his cold clothes, he set up camp not too far from the water, starved from food and lack of water, he sat by the fire, rethinking his choices.

He would think there would be barely a few ships that would be passing through, but he could only hope there would be another spice ship that could pick him up and take him somewhere. And anywhere for it didn't matter where he went.

The cold had settled into his bone, a primal hunger for food had made him think he was going to begin to lose his mind, so he decided to try and calm himself, thinking of a nice cup of black coffee and a plate lobster claws.... hmmm. How his stomach rumbled for that luxury.

He laid outstretched like he had gotten shot, lying on his side as he stared idly into the dying flames. The same sound of something popping its head out of breaching the water came from not too far from him, making him shoot up more abruptly when he remembered the pain in his back.

A gurgle came from the water plopping and swishing, and he caught the same coloured silver fish's (?) tail turning over in the shallow sand bed to return to the depths of the water. It could've been a shark for all he knew, circling for him and waiting.

Whatever that thing was, it looked big, and Julian's mouth watered at the thought of eating a large silver shark or swordfish to feast on. Next time, you'll get it, and you'll regret dealing with Julian Devorak. He promised himself.

He went to sleep that evening sprawled on his side, blinking in and out of sleep as he finally came to stare out just into the shore, before he heavily shut his eye, missing the creature's head bob up and dive back out of sight, its tail silver and long, flickering out and disappearing.

Hope you liked this new project. I only just got really into The Arcana game on apps and I LOVE IT so much! Especially Julian.

#julian devorak #pirate julian devorak #julian the arcana #julian devorak the arcana #julian devorak x reader #the arcana au #mermaid au #portia devorak #asra alnazar #different timeline #a goodish ending #julian loses eye and already knows asra

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thecardsimagine · 5 years

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Of shipwrecks and seafoam

Summary: Let me tell you a story about a pirate and a merman, finding a love that goes beyond insecurities and death. Let yourself be taken away onto a journey about doubt and secrets, understanding and a bond that even goes beyond the deep blue of the ocean.

Pairing: Merman!Julian Devorak x Pirate!Reader (Nonbinary) Rating: Mature because of swearing and suggestive content Warning: Blood, Death, Killing Genre: Romance, Drama, Alternate Universe

ADDITIONAL WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: Vomit, Self-loathing/Self-Doubt, Angst, Mentioning of Death. Proceed with caution! ______________________________________________________________

a/n: Someone asked for suffering? That’s fine, it’s only just beginning. It’s not that bad yet. Everyone breathe out! Leave me a comment on what you thought about the new chapter! And always remember we only have 4 more Chapters and the Epilogue to go. Technically, I am already done and just procrastinating on the end lol. Please enjoy! ♥

Tagging: @julians-chest-hair / @sireennotsiren ______________________________________________________________

Chapter 8 - A Sister’s Duty

You had kissed him.

You had kissed Julian two times. And you had promised him to not hate him ever. He had returned your affection and then scurried off after hearing a loud shriek that sounded much like the way he had sounded when showing you his name in his language. Just like he asked you to, you hadn't gone into the water that night, instead, curled around the fire and fallen asleep on some point, but the thoughts were still working you when you woke up the next morning.

When you finally had enough of looming over what happened, you sat up, groaning as your head was spinning. Sleeping on the sand sure left its toll on you by now, your neck stiff and hurting. The fire next to you had burned down and the day didn't promise to be a very sunny one either, but again, it was neither cold nor warm. On some point of stretching your neck, you turned your head towards the water. Immediately your sight was greeted by two sparkling grey-blue eyes glancing back at you. Somehow the situation was familiar, but something seemed odd, and with the hints of panic rising in you, you slid further back into the direction of the thicket before you even had a grasp on what was happening.

It wasn't Julian. This creature had lighter hair than Julian, though it was just as wavy and unruly. The further you crouched away, the closer it got until a sudden body erected from the water, and you let out a surprised, "Oh!" Quickly, you avoided your eyes as you made out the naked woman's body. You were glad that most of herself was covered by wet hair, but you didn't want to be rude and stare for too long either

Unlike with Julian before, you weren't as afraid of her, though you still had respect of the situation, clearing your throat awkwardly. "H-Hi?" you asked, giving her a shy glance. "Oh, hi!" the mermaid chimed back chipperly. She sounded oddly joyful but still as pleasant as you were used to it by Julian's voice. "I brought you food!" she continued, dropping two fish into the sand next to the fireplace, headless and gutted, like you were used to it by now.

"I'm Portia, who are you?" she asked, sinking down into the sand and holding her head up by her hands. “I’m [Name]... Are you…?" Before you could finish your question, she nodded in agreement, humming a confirmation. "That idiot who comes up here every day is my brother," she confirmed your suspicion. Alone from how her tail and fins looked, she was relatively similar to Julian, aside from the light raise in color compared to him. "He asked me to bring you these. He can't come, and I am always up for an adventure!"

Perplex you shook your head, agreeing that you understood what she was saying, but it left questions open to answer. "Why can't he come? Did something happen?" Portia hummed thoughtfully before answering, searching for your eyes with hers before speaking up again. "He's… caught up in something you could say. Don't worry, I am sure he will come by sometime again, he's just like that, always disappearing somewhere."

She began slowly sinking back into the water, though you managed to call out to her before she disappeared. "Wait!" Facing you again, she eyed you questioningly, raising her eyebrow. "I-" you started. In reality, you tried to organize your thoughts, there were so many questions in your head, and you were unsure which one to ask first. Your mind was ringing in confusion, and it made it hard to process everything, so you spurted out the first thing you could.

"Can you stay for a while?"

Portia was different than her brother. Though you would say Julian was curious and always trying to find out more things, Portia sure was more likely to explore the things in a more straightforward way. It wasn't unpleasant, but for the first time, you realized how much effort Julian must have put into behaving like a human. At least, she would share a meal with you, something Julian hadn't dared before.

"You don't mind being close to the fire?" you asked her after a while, watching her slip another piece of fish into her mouth. "No, not really. I know I shouldn't touch it, but I see no harm otherwise," she explained calmly, unbothered by the flames flicking out into her direction. Apparently, she didn't even mind the cooked fish, though much like Julian with the water, she seemed indifferent about the taste.

"So, Julian… Is he alright? You said he got caught up in something?" you asked carefully, having noticed her hesitation before. "Oh, he's… Well, yeah. Don't worry about him, it's just how he is." She seemed thoughtful for a moment, pulling apart the flesh of the fish in her hand. "He's very important for our flock… And he works with our Leader."

"The same that got hurt by fire before?" you asked without thinking, seeing her eyes shine up in surprise. "Oh, did he talk to you about it?" For a moment, you hesitated. This was an excellent chance to gather some information, but at the same time, you felt like backstabbing Julian, who had been reluctant to tell you. "I mean, if he did, I guess there's no harm in telling you," Portia chimed, almost relieved at that.

"Yeah, Leader Lucio had this very nasty encounter with humans who tried to burn him. But it's his fault after all! That maniac wanted to be a human so bad, he would have done anything he could! But now, Julian has to take care of him and his moods, while he's treated like a lowly servant."

Letting out a small gasp, you were glad she didn't seem to notice while you worked through the information you had just received. A mermaid wanting to become a human sounded almost too much like a fairytale to believe it, and yet, you had no reason to doubt her words. "He thinks it's his fault the Leader got hurt when really, it's all that stupid Lucio's fault."

"Why's that?" you asked, curiously. "Well…" with her claws, she shredded the fish skin in small stripes while talking, her face grim. "After all, it was Julian who said he would make sure that Lucio would become human and be accepted into their society. How should he have known the serum he created would wear off when Lucio got in touch with water though? The serum just wasn't completed yet, but the Leader insisted on taking it, and now everyone blames Julian. It's quite ridiculous."

She sighed heavily and deeply. "He's my brother, but sometimes I wish he had gotten some of my thinking. Always putting himself below others, constantly worrying and making me clean up behind him. Like this morning, when he said, "Portia, my dear sister! Please go see the human and bring some food!" without leaving me any choice!" She let out an annoyed huff before looking up, seemingly remembering something. "Oh, it's nothing personal. It's just… No one knew you were up here, so it came as a shock that he again was trying to connect to this… other world."

Nodding slowly, your throat felt so dry when you finally swallowed a piece of fish you had kept inside of your mouth while listening. You were trying hard to follow her story, understand the meaning of it all, and piece together the information she was giving you. But it all seemed so out of place, and it left you with an uncomfortable knot in your stomach. "You know…" she picked up her words again, finally looking up at you.

"At first, I was really upset he'd make me do something as unreasonable as to meet a human, but you're really not half as bad as I expected." She giggled softly, and you smiled meekly in return. "What did you expect to happen then?" It was a question you were soon to regret. "Oh, you know. The usual. Spears, threatening me, trying to eat my flesh. Some really still believe it makes them immortal to eat a mermaid, even though-" she gave her tail a rough slap, giggling some more, "-we're just big fishies!"

With a short break, she took a deep breath before continuing. "After all, it's the other way around." At this, your attention peaked, and you quickly swallowed the piece of fish you had in your mouth again, eyes connecting with hers. "We eat humans to stay alive for so long. But don't worry, I wouldn't do you anything, you are precious to my brother after all, so it's my duty as a sister to keep you safe too!"

The last few sentences you were barely able to pick up, your head starting to spin frantically while the panic began to spread its wings inside of you again. So they did eat humans? But Julian had said they didn't! Had he really be lying to you the whole time? But why? Why would he… Except he had plans that he wasn't going to share with you. "Oh, look at the sun, I really should get going."

Portia heaved her body back into the water without giving you a second look over, flicking the fish shreds onto the surface where they drifted off. Maybe if she had looked back at that moment, she would have noticed how much your body shivered. "My brother might not be able to come by as often anymore. The Leader is impatient and really wants the new serum to finish soon. So he's tail-deep in trouble for disappearing so much the last few days." With a bit of a groan, she finally managed to slide back into the cool wet, leaving you behind speechless. "They need to make sure to use the amount of humans we only recently received properly and not let them go to waste. And they need his assistance more than ever."

Turning towards you, she gave you a toothy smile, before shouting out, "Call me, if you need something!" waved and disappeared, leaving you behind.

Before your mind could set its foot down, your body convulsed, and you rushed to get up, running towards the thicket. Your wound burned for the first time in days, tears falling freely from your eyes while you toppled over releasing a stream of vomit from your mouth. You had been wrong, with everything. Against the better judgment of your body, you had yourself be pulled in by a quite literal siren's call.

"Fuck!" you groaned, realizing what kind of mouth you had kissed, what words you had trusted. A murderer's words in a sense, though you couldn't even call it cannibalism after all. Those mermaids were killing humans like the tales spoke, luring them into wrecking their ships to eat them, to stay alive. To stay alive for centuries even. And though you barely wanted to believe it, Julian was no better than them, his confession of age being the best prove at that.

"They… They ate…" you stuttered slowly, feeling like your head was going to explode with all the feelings and thoughts. Clasping your hands over your eyes, you slumped down, letting out ugly screams of pain and overwhelming sadness. The thought had been there for a long time, but now it got so much more tragic, more than you could handle by yourself. Julian had saved you, fully knowing that his kind was slaughtering the others that had still be alive when the ship got wrecked. He damned you to live with the guilt of knowing that you had just been lucky to be spared by him.

In the end, he was nothing different from a monster.

He even assisted in salvaging whatever was left in the bodies for them to use! And it didn't matter to you if it was for weird potions or serums, or to simply consume them.

You couldn't help but lean forward once more, the rest of the fish and water leaving your body disgustingly. The imaginary in your head drove you insane, making you wish you had never thought about it. Pulling in your legs, you wept loudly, sure that there was no one to hear you now. You ignored the burning of your body, your wound upset with your position, and just kept on rocking back and forth, for as long as you needed to calm down, ignoring every sound and animal that was around you.

When you came back to your senses, hours must have passed. Either you had laid in the sand while being unresponsive or you really had passed out, your conscience unable to keep up with your thoughts and feelings and shutting itself down. Whatever it was, it didn't really matter. Again you felt the water rise in your eyes, the tears falling down and disappearing in the sand. "No, no, no…" you muttered, releasing the hold you had on your knees still, muscles and bones aching under the movement. Deep inside, you didn't want to believe it. But what really bothered you was a very specific thought.

Were you the next meal? The next experimental body? The reserve human in case something goes wrong, and they needed more?

You couldn't trust anyone anymore. Not Julian, who had lied to you more than once you were sure by now. Not Portia, who didn't seem to understand the heaviness that her words had on you. You couldn't even trust yourself, because you had been dumb enough to believe these creatures even though you very obviously had been fooled into safety, with your body trying to tell you to get away.

More and more overcome with self-loathing, you clasped your hands over your ears, hoping it would shut down the sounds of your own thoughts. Dumb, an idiot, ridden with feelings. You would have rather kissed that creature instead of finding out the truth. Be dependant on it, though you really just needed to get the fuck away from it. How stupid could one be? How unspeakable naive and empathetic? You had really thought your words hurt him? Even though it was he, who would be mercilessly taking what he needed from you?

Your whole body felt dirty when you remembered everything he had touched. And you had so willingly shared your feelings and thoughts on the tour around the island just the day before. Playing into his plan, that's what you had done. Let him patch you up so you would be an even better human to harvest or whatever they did with the humans.

"I have to get out," you mumbled, throat so dry it hurt to speak.

Without blinking, you stared at the water, its waves softly brushing against the shore like every day so far. If you wanted to have any chance of survival, even the smallest, you had to flee. You'd need a boat, and with the compass he brought you, you would sail into a direction, without looking back, just far far away. Too far for him to reach you. It was the only thing you could do. You owed it to the comrades that had passed in the monster's wrath. You owed them your life, so you had to keep living. See their families, tell them what happened.

You couldn't die here, through the claws of these monsters.

Wobbling, but filled with a sudden determination, you got up. Your body hurt, but you dragged it back to the fire, lightening it up with a new stack of wood and putting the water to boil on it. What you needed was a boat, food, water. It would take a while, but if you only put your heart into it, you could excel.

For the first time in days, you approached your lonely spear, which had waited for you in the sand. You should have used it so much earlier. Close to it, you also found the same stone you used to sharpen it with. Armed with those two, you started your journey into the woods. In your head, you already planned out exactly what you needed, finding alternatives for it and beginning to collect whatever you could already, making sure to hide them, just in case Julian would come back and tried to keep you from your plan.

You've come so far, he would not stop you now, or ever.

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waterlilyvioletfog · 5 years

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Top 3 Supernatural Episodes Per Season

Warning: Spoilers below the cut. I am SUPER biased. Take everything I say with a HEALTHY grain of salt.

Season 1: omg they look like INFANTS

1. “Home” 1x09. This episode is amaaaaaaaaaaaaazing AND it’s super important to the mytharch AND we get Winchester family drama. One of those early instances of “Wow we need to give Jensen Ackles an emmy like yesterday”. Mary turns up and foreshadows like??? so much??

2. “Scarecrow” 1x11. Super creepy, major “The Lottery” vibes, fuck I just. I love it.

3. “Hell House” 1x17. Close call between this one and “Something Wicked” but in the end, Harry and Ed and all the hilarity that ensues just. *chef’s kiss*

Honorable Mentions: “Something Wicked”

Season 2: ugh so many good episodes season 2 is SO good

1. “The Usual Suspects” 2x07. SAM GETS TO BE SO SNARKY IN THIS EPISODE AND I LOOOOVE IT. Also Diana is a bamf.

2. “Croatoan” 1x09. UGH YASSSSSSS. Close call between this and “In My Time Of Dying”, though

3. “What is And What Should Never Be” 2x20. Look man, I don’t know what to tell you. I’m cheap as all get out. Dean angst? Gimme gimme. Also it has WYNONNA EARP IN IT.

Honorable Mentions: “In My Time of Dying”, “Nightshifter”

Season 3: half of these episodes suck, the other half are perfect heeeelllppp

1. “Bad Day At Black Rock” 3x03. This episode it just hilarious from start to finish. Also, Bela vs. Dean.

2. “Mystery Spot” 3x11. A double whammy of HILARIOUS and OH FUCK THIS IS DEPRESSING.

3. “Jus In Bello” 3x12. It was real hard to decide between this and Ghostfacers but ultimately, Nancy Fitzgerald (aka Ella Lopez) and Victor Henrikson are the actual best and deserve all the love ever.

Honorable Mentions: “Ghostfacers”, “The Kids Are Alright”

Season 4: Somehow there is only one episode that is not stunningly amazing??

1: “On the Head of A Pin” 4x16. Cas becomes a main character and it is AMAZING and oh my god give Jensen ALL the emmys oh and ALSO we finally learn exactly what Sam and Ruby’s “extracurricular activities” entail. Feels like a movie. We get the reveal that the angels are working to break the seals. Anna is also amazing. Why is this episode so beautiful. I’m fucking crying and so is Dean. I could gush for hours.

2. “It’s a Terrible Life” 4x17. This episode is just a fucking delight. (Am I giving it such a high score on the basis of The Kink’s “Well Respected Man” alone? Maybe. Honestly I SHOULD be putting Rapture here but oh well. I’m biased.)

3. “Monster Movie” 4x05. It was hard to decide between this “In the Beginning” “Lazarus Rising” “The Rapture” and “Lucifer Rising” (which all deserve all the praise ever) but ugh ugh ugh this episode is ALSO perfect AND I love it a bajillion. It’s in black and white and the guest actress is SO pretty and also I think I’ve already gone into detail about how the MoTW is a Lucifer Parallel. Also Dean says he’s been rehymenated so TRANS!DEAN RIGHTS!

Honorable Mentions: “In The Beginning” “Lazarus Rising” “Lucifer Rising” “The Rapture”

Season 5: You want to be sad? You also want to watch really good TV? SEASON FIVE IS WHERE IT’S AT!

1. “Two Minutes To Midnight” 5x21. I know, I know. I should be putting “Swan Song” here but look,, I am easily bought with the promise of Julian Richings as Death.

2. “Free To Be You And Me” 5x03. Funny Destiel buddy cop film, Sam gets to be filtered through the eyes of an audience-stand-in in universe, also contains Castiel’s ICONIC line “but today you’re MY little bitch”.

3. “Dark Side of The Moon” 5x16. Narrowly beats out “My Bloody Valentine”, “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid”, and “The Song Remains The Same”. I am trash for any pieces of Sam and Dean’s childhoods and also this episode gives me SO MUCH material for beating up John with a baseball bat.

Honorable Mentions: “Swan Song” “My Bloody Valentine” “Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid” “The Song Remains The Same” “The End”

Season 6: We Don’t Talk About Season Six.

1. “The Man Who Would Be King” 6x20. Cas. Destiel. Ow.

2. “Mommy Dearest” 6x19. Eve! Sam Smith! idk, I just really like it.

3. “Appointment In Samarra” 6x11. As I said, I am easily bought with Julian Richings. Tessa the Reaper!!! Sam stop trying to murder your father.

Honorable Mentions: “You Can’t Handle The Truth” “My Heart Will Go On” “Weekend At Bobby’s”

Season 7: Terrible reputation given the fact that it has SO many great episodes. Sera Gamble? You’re mean.

1. “Slash Fiction” 7x06. Why is this episode so hilarious???? Robbie Thompson starting out with a BANG!

2. “Plucky Pennywhistle’s Magical Menagerie” 7x14. In the total goop of “thick. black. ooze.” of this season, 7x14 is a light in the darkness. Every inkling of joy, of spark, of color, of childishness, all of it, poured out into this one episode, wherein Sam totally loses his cool and I love it. Sam looks so pretty at the end. Dean is simultaneously an actual child and an actual Dad and I love it.

3. “Out With The Old” 7x16. I love me some levis, man, don’t know what to tell you. It’s just so fun!!

Honorable Mentions: All of Robbie’s episodes, “Hello, Cruel World” “Repo Man” “Reading Is Fundamental” “How To Win Friends And Influence Monsters”

(The ONLY reason I’m not including TBAI is bc @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs is slowly converting me to hating Megstiel enough to not watch Destiel episodes)

Season 8: That one season where we admitted that Crowley’s a DICK.

1. “Hunteri Heroici” 8x08. CAAAAS!!! Also the only episode where anyone watching actually gives a shit about the Sam x Amelia flashbacks.

2. “LARP And The Real Girl” 8x11. Super fun! CHARLIE RETURNS. Dean is a FUCKING NERD. Sam gets flirted with :) Real close tie between this one and Pac-Man Fever

3. “The Great Escapist” 8x20. Edlund really gave it his all for this last episode. Cas kicks SO much ass. Sam needs to be protected at ALL costs. Kevin ALSO kicks SO much ass. The actor who plays Sweet Pea on Riverdale is here??? Wow.

Honorable Mentions: “Pac-Man Fever” “As Time Goes By” “Everyone Hates Hitler” “Trial And Error”

(See note on The Born-Again Identity for why Goodbye Stranger is not on this list. Again, blame @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs )

Season 9: Sam is mad at Dean for not letting him go

1. “First Born” 9x11. No, I will not elaborate. Tim Omundson speaks for himself. There is nothing wrong with this entire episode and if you try to tell me there is I can and will gut you like a fish.

2. “Heaven Can’t Wait” 9x06. DESTIELLLLLLLLLLLL.

3. “Do You Believe In Miracles?” 9x23. Wow it’s the first Season Finale to make it to my top 3!! Metatron gets what’s coming, DEAN BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON.

Honorable Mentions: “Bad Boys” “Mother’s Little Helper” “Alex Annie Alexis Ann” “Meta Fiction”

Season 10: Dean is mad at Sam for not letting him go

1. “The Executioner’s Song” 10x14. See my comments on “First Born”.

2. “Angel Heart” 10x20. BRING YOUR DAUGHTER TO WORK DAY. DESTIEL. JIMMY X AMELIA. COOL UNCLE SAMMY. DEAN IS A NERD. DEAN IS CLAIRE’S DAD NOW SORRY NO TAKE BACKS. (also, “blue eyes crying” is just ugh ugh ugh)

3. “The Werther Project” 10x18. SAMWITCH RISE!!!!!!!!!!!

Honorable Mentions: “Hibbing 911″ “The Prisoner” “The Things We Left Behind”

Season 11: Ahh, yes. You. Lucifer. Get fucked.

1. “Don’t Call Me Shurley” 11x20. *slow clap* Robbie Thompson, you have served your country well.

2. “Red Meat” 11x17. This is gonna sound strange, but this episode is sorta my comfort food?? I’ve watched it literally so many times. I love it. So much.

3. “The Chitters” 11x19. Nancy Won wrote three episodes for SPN, all in season 11, they are all stellar. Chitters is GAY. She also wrote “Don’t You Forget About Me” and “Thin Lizzie” I’m putting them here so as not to crowd up the Honorable Mentions.

Honorable Mentions: “The Vessel” “Devil In the Details” “We Happy Few” “Baby” “Form And Void” “Into the Mystic” honestly just watch every non-bucklemming episode they are pretty much all amazing.

Season 12: I WILL DEFEND MARY WITH MY LIFE DON’T @ ME

1. “The Future” 12x19. DESTIEL. I would die for Kelly. Fetus!Jack. GOODBYE DAGON!! THE MIXTAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. “Who We Are” 12x22. JUST KILL ME WHY DON’T YOU, BOBO?! WE ALL KNOW YOU WANT TO.

3. “Stuck In the Middle (With You)” 12x12. Destiel love confession!!!!!! Drowley!! Mary will fight everyone willingly!! SAM GETS THE ORANGE JACKET

Honorable Mentions: Every. Single. Non-BL. Episode. Watch. Them. Now.

Season 13: JAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!

1. “Advanced Thanatology” 13x05. *inhales deeply* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Also, Steppenwolf.

2. “Beat the Devil” 13x21. DICK JOKES GALORE. Also, we must protect Sam at all costs. Gabena is perfect. Samwitch is also perfect. Sabriel is also good. Lucifer can go fuck himself.

3. “Breakdown” 13x11. It physically pains me not to put “Funeralia” here but alas, I must not show Steve Yockey too much favoritism. Anyways. DONNA!!! DOUG!! CREEPY!!! SAM’S HEART IS WORTH SO MUCH MONEY!! GIVE SAMMY A HUG!!

Honorable Mentions: “The Scorpion And The Frog” “Funeralia” “The Thing” “The Bad Place” “The Big Empty” “Lost And Found”

Season 14:

1. “Moriah” 14x20. Proof that Supernatural will go down in history as ALMIGHTY. GOD IS THE ULTIMATE VILLAIN.

2. “Peace of Mind” 14x15. I still haven’t recovered. Jared must have had literally all the fun in the world.

3. “Mint Condition” 14x04. Yay!! Very fun!!! (I wanted to put Optimism here, but again, I can’t show Yockey so much favoritism. It’s not my fault! he’s too good!!)

Honorable Mentions: “Optimism” “Ouroboros” “Unhuman Nature” “Byzantium” “Damaged Goods”

#spn #too many episodes to tag #supernatural #rankings

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ti-bae-rius · 5 years

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Pre-QoAaD release fic (Kitty) Part 2 of 2

(TW: The Cohort being assholes, mention of grief/death.) Obviously, LoS spoilers. This was kind of meant to be a fun little fic before QoAaD releases. Yes, I did leave this very late.

You can read part 1 here!

As soon as the portal guard checked their portal pass and marked it void with a stamp, handing it back to Ty, the two set off through the halls of the Gard. The moment they turned a corner, out o view and earshot, Ty stopped. “Okay, the meeting is in the basement. I scoped the room and I found a place we can listen in from. Come on.” The two of them hurried down some stone spiral stairs and when they reached a corridor at the bottom, Kit looked along the walls that were lined to the floor with tapestries showing important events in shadowhunter history. Halfway down the hall, Ty reached out and drew aside a tapestry emblazoned with a depiction of Jonathan Shadowhunter and his sister Abigail. He saw Ty’s eyes linger wistfully on the art before he beckoned Kit. Ty pulled a hairpin from his bag and shoved it into the lock of a door behind the arras. “Don’t you have a rune for this?” Kit hissed as Ty jiggled the hairpin in the door. “My track record with open runes isn’t great,” Ty shot back. Kit nudged him out of the way impatiently and took the pin from Ty’s hand. In the fifteen years living with his father, Kit had learnt to pick a lock. The mechanism gave and the door popped open, the boys dashing in and shutting themselves into the dark room as Zara’s familiar voice came on the other side, along with dozens of footsteps. “That was close,” Kit breathed. A ray of light tore through the dark room. Ty had a small torch in his mouth, held between his teeth. He motioned to a ladder attached to the wall and indicated for Kit to climb. When Kit was a few rungs up, Ty started climbing himself. Pulling himself onto the platform at the top, Ty removed the torch from his mouth and put a finger to his lips. Kit took the hint. “Where are we?” he whispered, shuffling nervously closer to Ty. “We’re in one of the box balconies. And down there,” Ty said, twitching aside the flag that hung over the balcony’s exposed side, keeping the boys hidden. Kit peeked through the makeshift curtain and saw the huge room below, a large circle of chairs dominating the space. A huge set of double doors creaked open and Ty readjusted the flag carefully. “Down there is the Cohort meeting,” Ty finished in a whisper, switching the torch off and casting the two of them into darkness, the space lit only by the half-light of the room below which was slowly filling with Cohort members. As Kit’s eyes adjusted, he could make out the vague shape of Ty beside him on the small balcony. Ty held his arm out and pointed to the rune he’d just drawn on his forearm by the minimal light of the main room below. He looked visibly uncomfortable and Kit understood why when Ty mouthed something: heightened hearing. Kit put his arm out and let Ty mark him with his second rune. It was strange, Kit thought, that all the runes he had were applied by Ty. No wonder Ty was uncomfortable; he was already way more sensitive to noise than Kit without runes. The burn of the stele as it touched his skin made Kit hiss in a breath and dig his nails into the meat of his palms. When the pain eased a little, the two of them focused their attention to the conversations of the meeting beginning below.

“My father being in charge is the best thing that’s happened to the shadow world for centuries,” Zara declared and a group mutter of assent rumbled through the echo chamber of a meeting. “Since Father has bigger issues to handle, I’ll be leading the meeting. Did you see he took the banner of that Downworld-lover, Alec Lightwood and put a photo of me up instead?” “It’s for the best. It’s not good for the shadowhunter children to see someone like that celebrated as a hero,” Samantha Larkspear said. Her twin, Dane, barked a laugh. “We could make a whole list of problems with that...I don’t even want to call him a shadowhunter.” “Well, he isn’t one. He’s with that Downworld whore, Bane, and one of his kids is a half-demon too,” Samantha said. “Gotta feel bad for the other kid though, the shadowhunter. He needs a real, shadowhunter family, with a mom and a dad. He needs saving from them.” Ty was boiling with rage. Magnus and Alec, and their sons, had come to look after them in London when Emma and Julian were in Cornwall, and they were the kind of family Ty had always kind of wanted. They were loving and affectionate and, regardless of the Cohort’s disagreement on Magnus and Alec’s child-rearing ability, Rafael and Max had two, doting and devoted parents, which is more than Ty had had in years. And the idea Alec didn’t deserve to be deemed a modern day Nephilim hero was so absurd Ty could hardly believe these people thought what they did. “We don’t have time to dwell on that mess of a family,” Zara said, though her voice seemed to communicate the fact she’d like to. “They’ve run off back to New York anyway. What I’m more concerned about is the fact that the Blackthorns have their tainted slut sister back.” She spat the words and they felt jarring and sharp, like venom flying from her lips. Ty wondered how many minds had already changed from that toxin, how many people had been poisoned. “I can’t believe Jia Penhallow is Consul. How can she possibly be in government and let her daughter marry that?” Jessica Beausejours spat, the French lilt identifying her to Ty even though he couldn’t see her. He could feel himself shaking with rage, felt Kit’s eyes on him. Helen - his beautiful, caring, empathetic, understanding sister - was not a ‘that’. He forced his breath to even out, even as Jessica went on. “The funeral was...something.” “Yeah, something great,” Dane added. These four or so voices seemed to be dominating the space, though Ty knew there were at least another dozen people there. “I’ll give the Blackthorns this: they put on a show.” “I still can’t believe that Ty kid climbed onto the pyre,” Samantha grinned. “I can’t believe he didn’t stay there,” a new voice replied. Ty’s head jerked up in recognition. “If the freak burnt, it’s not like we’d be losing a shadowhunter.” Paige Ashdown, only 15, was part of the Cohort. And she knew too much. Ty knew there was a reason Julian had kept them separate from the rest of the shadow world, knew he was different. He wasn’t stupid; he knew his siblings weren’t the same as him. But Paige knew him. Paige could tell everyone what she knew, could ruin everything. Kit looked across at Ty, who’d frozen. He was no longer shaking, just blanched and wide-eyed. Without a word, Kit shuffled closer to Ty and put a hand over Ty’s where it rested, braced on the ground, clammy and shaking. “Ty...” he began in a whisper. “Shh, I’m trying to listen,” Ty replied under his breath. He was moonlight pale but his jaw was set determinedly. If he was hurt - and Kit knew he was - he didn’t say anything, just focussed harder on the task at hand as the Cohort’s laughter died down and Zara spoke up. “We need to push for the Registry to pass. With my father being Inquisitor, we have the voice and clout in the Council we always should have. Families like the Blackthorns and now the Lightwoods prove that registering downworlders is necessary for maintaining pure, shadowhunter bloodlines. Honourable lines are being corrupted by tainted blood. As true, full-blood Nephilim, we can’t stand for it. It’s just simple facts; shadowhunters are superior warriors, so the purer the Nephilim blood, the better the warrior. It’s why I’m going to be the next Jace Herondale. I have pure blood. Father and I-” “Take a shot every time she says ‘father’,” Kit muttered and heard Ty huff a quiet laugh beside him that filled Kit with a strange sense of pride. When the two of them tuned back in, Zara was still talking. Shocker, Kit thought, rolling his eyes. “Why should we dumb ourselves down to fight alongside-” “Say, ‘mudbloods’,” Kit said, under his breath. “Please say ‘mudbloods’.” “-shadowhunters who don’t have the same Angel-given talent because somewhere in their line, one of their family screwed around with downworlders and brought shame on the whole shadow world? It’s ridiculous!” The others muttered their agreement and Zara turned to Dane Larkspear. “Dane, what have you found out about the so-called honourable shadowhunter families?” “Well, we know the Lightwoods are corrupt now, but did you know that not only was Isabelle’s fiancé a vampire before he was a shadowhunter, but their ancestor, Benedict Lightwood, died of demon pox.” “No wonder the Lightwoods are so messed up,” Zara said. “It’s in their genes to be downworlders’ bitches.” “The Herondale line too-” Dane continued before Jessica interrupted. “That’s not news, Dane. We all know that Tessa Gray bitch ruined their line. How Jace is still so amazing, I don’t know.” “I would totally kill that Clary for a chance with Jace Herondale,” Samantha giggled. Ty wondered how serious that death threat was. It was sinister paired with the playful laugh of teenage girls with crushes. “You wouldn’t struggle. She’s like 5-foot-nothing and basically a Mundie,” Zara commented. “She really doesn’t deserve Jace.” “Anyway,” Dane said, clearly impatient with the girls’ gossipy chatter about Jace. “I’m not talking about that. That Kit kid is hanging around with the Blackthorns, he’s the lost Herondale from that traitor Tobias’s line.” He seemed satisfied with the wave of noise that went through the room at this. The mention of his name had made Kit’s palm sweaty where it rested on Ty’s hand. “Not only that, he’s descended from the First Heir, Auraline.” He paused for effect before he said the words that made Kit’s hand spasm. “A faerie.” However, this revelation was nothing compared to what Dane followed up with, voice alive with glee. “The Lost Herondale line have a nasty little habit of ending up dead in suspicious circumstances. It turns out, a little group called the Riders of Mannan tend to be behind it and they’ve already tracked Kit down and almost got him but Bane interfered. But, what that means is that the Unseelie King’s bloodhounds, the most deadly assassins in the shadow world, have their sights on one untrained fifteen year old with blood weakened by Faerie interference.” Dane almost growled the last words. “Kit Herondale doesn’t stand a chance.”

“Shit!” Ty looked across, about to shush Kit, but he stopped. Kit was rigid with fear, shaking like a leaf. From down below, a voice rung out. “Did you hear something?” “Kit, we need to go,” Ty said firmly, and flung his backpack onto his shoulders, turning the flashlight on and holding it between his teeth as he began to climb down the ladder. Kit didn’t move. “Kit,” Ty said awkwardly around the torch. Kit looked down and his fight or flight kicked in. He scrabbled to follow Ty and the two took off as a voice in the meeting hall confirmed knowledge of their eavesdropping. “I think we have a spy.” The two of them burst through the huge double doors of the Gard and out onto the crest of the hill, overlooking Idris in all its spacious greenery. Ty was mentally calculating. Kit was already breathing hard and Ty wasn’t sure the boy’s shaking limbs would hold out long enough for them to make it home before the Cohort reached them - they had horses after all. Diana’s weapons store was closer, but it wasn’t worth risking her not being in. Plus, seeking refuge there would mean having to explain what they’d been doing. Absolutely not. He could hear footsteps nearby. They were running out of time. If Livvy was here, she’d know what to do. Livvy. “Come on,” Ty said, and grabbed Kit’s hand, pulling him around the side of the Gard and into the private graveyard around the back. Most shadowhunters went to the Bone City when they died. That’s where Livvy was, Ty knew, part of the monument of shadowhunters who’d died serving the Angel. But some families buried their loved ones in the cemetery behind the Gard. Kit walked dazedly over to a grave marked ‘Celine Herondale’. He faltered, a hand atop the tombstone. It felt cold and almost wet to the touch, like it had held centuries of rainwater and family’s tears in the stone. “I know she wasn’t from my line, but it feels weird seeing my last name on a gravestone,” he admitted. His voice sounded shaky and uncertain, like he wasn’t sure of the words before they were hanging in the tense air. The low temperature seemed to freeze what he said in place between them. “So, what now? That’s just it? Fifteen years of pleasant ignorance and now I have a target on my back.” He gave a laugh that sounded harsh and insincere. “This shadowhunter stuff sucks, y’know?” “You’re safe in Alicante,” Ty pointed out, lingering back a little. “The Unseelie can’t walk on Idris ground.” “So I just hide here forever?” Kit questioned, exasperated. “I just...hang out here with the Cohort until I die of old age or stress, whichever comes sooner?” “I’d hazard a guess at stress,” Ty commented. “God, I feel like I could cry,” Kit said, rubbing a hand across his face with a noise somewhere between a laugh and a sob. “Then you should cry. I won’t let them hurt you.” Ty sat down on the bench behind them. “I let them kill Livvy. I won’t let them kill you.” “You didn’t let them kill her,” Kit said, sitting down beside Ty. The stone bench held the same cold, almost damp feeling. “It wasn’t something you could’ve stopped from happening. One moment everything was okay and then...” “Then it wasn’t,” Ty finished. “Then it wasn’t,” Kit agreed. Ty looked out at the graves and sighed, resting his chin on his hand. “Is it bad I kind of wish Livvy had a grave?” “I don’t think that’s bad. Why do you wish that?” “I wish I could come and sit with her,” Ty said. “I could come and tell her about what I’m doing, about missions, about you and the others.” Kit glanced across and felt horror grip his chest when he saw Ty’s eyes were glassy. There was nothing he could say that would make this better. “I miss her,” he said softly, voice splintering like wood. It was the first time Kit had seen him close to tears since Livvy had died. It felt so much worse than the recklessness, but Kit knew it was definitely healthier than bottling everything up. Uncertainly, Kit edged closer until their elbows touched. “I know,” Kit said. He was casting furtive glances across at Ty and rubbed his sweaty hands on his jeans before he put an arm around Ty’s shoulder. He felt Ty tense briefly, felt his own toes curl, then Ty relaxed and Kit felt the anxious knot in his stomach loosen a little. “I know you do,” Ty said simply, looking out over the crest of the hill, above the headstones and turned dirt and yellowing grass. “That’s why I told you. I knew you wouldn’t think it sounded weird. Your dad died too.” “He was all I had.” “But now you have us.” Kit smiled down at his feet despite himself, “Yeah.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I don’t care what the Cohort thinks of you, there’s a life out there for you, Ty. Maybe it’s a different one than it would have been if Livvy was here, but there is a life for you. I know it doesn’t seem like it, but your life can go on. She’d want your life to go on, Ty.” “Will you come too?” Ty asked. “Wherever ‘out there’ is?” Kit nodded and squeezed Ty’s shoulder. “Of course I will.” He knew those four words were a promise bigger than he could fully comprehend, a solemn vow. He knew that and meant it anyway. Perhaps his life wasn’t as secure as it had been a year ago, a fortnight ago, an hour ago. But it was still a life, and without it he wouldn’t have felt Ty’s head loll against his shoulder, wouldn’t have heard Ty’s breathing slow as his cheek brushed the material of Kit’s jacket. It was still a life worth living, for as long as he could get away with living it.

And that’s it! I hope everyone enjoys QoAaD. Once it’s released, I won’t be using tumblr too much but I’ll try and queue lots of posts (if I can remember how to queue after all this time!). I’ll still be online for a few more days, but I hope you enjoyed this fic. TDA means the world to me, and I’m so grateful to have journeyed through it with all of you. Here’s to TEC, TWP, and TLH. x

#kitty #KITTY FIC #ty and kit #kit and ty #kit herondale #Ty Blackthorn #tiberius blackthorn #tsc #tda #the dark artifices #QOOAD #queen of air and darkness #Fic #fanfic #cassandra clare

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jcmorgenstern · 5 years

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Rambly not-review of QOAAD

Lol so tumblr is on fire and so am I so here’s Some Thoughts on QOAAD, mostly about the not-crispy boy, not as annoying and bitter as I usually am:

Bottom line: CC did right by me, y’all. Whether or not she did right by everyone else I can’t really say, but half of the time reading this book I felt she was catering to me personally, and y’all know how esoteric ‘catering to me personally’ is. There is some Wild Fuckening Shit in this book, and I for the most part loved it. A lot of my old gripes still apply, but tbh? for a kid’s book CC has really delivered some absolute gems and as critical as I often am, I really enjoyed reading this book.

Spoilers for the entire TDA trilogy, especially QOAAD, below.

Okay so for those of y’all who have read the book: let’s just get that whole thing out of the way. Yes she did in fact write three chapters of an AU where Sebastian won, is shacking up with a deeply unhappy Jace, and yes, I did in fact die irl. Like honestly I understand that’s problematic, and that the whole situation was about as fucked up as it gets, but honestly? I don’t give a shit. I was Thriving and even though I had to read Seb’s dumb ass dying again it was totally worth it 10/10.

Also Ash? Dark Jace? Biggest nut.

Basically, my criteria for liking the book were: (1) Ash can’t be a carbon-copy of Sebastian (2) Kieran doesn’t die and gets with Mark/Cristina (3) Diana and Gwyn stay together and (4) Kit and Ty keep being adorable. Bonus points were for (1) Dru and Ash interaction (2) more Dru content in general (3) Aline and Helen (4) that hint of Sebastian content she kept teasing that I never believed would actually materialize and (5) Julian and Emma breaking up so I never had to read another word about their “true love” at age 16 ever again (I’m a bitter asshole).

I honestly expected to get pretty much none of these and I was shocked to get everything except (5) from the list and so much more. So without further ado:

The whole Thule thing was a lot, tbh, starting with Maryse’s execution (I won’t lie, when Sebastian says “I killed my mother for Jace, and now he can return the favor” my dumb ass did in fact squeal out loud in a public bookstore) and ending with Sebastian’s really, really, really bad parenting skills. As a side note, the show must have had an advance copy of the book, because you may recognize the song little Jace sings with Izzy in....whatever episode they go into Jace’s head as the song Maryse sings before she dies. As far as I recall, that hasn’t been mentioned before (as well as the Malachi Configuration) so clearly the show got confused with the book release date. I’m sure that made CC very happy.

Like honestly Thule!Seb is just COHF!Seb taken up to 11, which is honestly a terrifying and hilarious thought, complete with a still-kicking designer clothes fetish and an inability to dream up a setting that isn’t a club. Sebastian’s designer suit fetish never really made much sense to me in terms of his personality--it always seems to remind me that I am, in essence, reading The Draco Trilogy with the names changed. But there are a lot of little details that recall COLS, which is always a plus for me, but also seem to indicate that he’s never really progressed or ‘matured’ beyond that. The return to the club setting as a callback to club in COLS, dressing Jace like a paper doll. While Thule itself is an imaginative setting, Sebastian’s presentation and behavior hasn’t changed at all, which shows that ultimately CC’s view of him is one of being completely static and inhuman.

I always really hated that, but here it works--it gives the impression that even though he’s won and destroyed the world, he’s living in the past, attempting to recreate COLS best he can. That mind-controlling Jace, going for a romantic murder or two with him, and chatting with Clary about how much she hates him is the happiest he’s been, the closest thing to family he can conceive of. I think one of the most fucked up parts of COLS, and one of my favorites, is that the Magic House is a darkly genteel reflection of the warped view of family Valentine has, that Sebastian has symbolically completed.

Valentine’s wardrobe full of clothes he’s bought for Jocelyn for “when she returns,” all with the tags still on, is possibly the most chilling part of the entire book. He views his family--Jocelyn, Jace, Clary, as a thing to accomplish, to control, to collect and arrange in a seemly manner. He truly seems to think, or at least want to believe, that after he’s destroyed the entire downworld and the entire shadowworld government that they can all go play happy families. That his family would want to play happy families with him, or even be anywhere near him. It’s both terrifyingly cruel and self-aware and completely naïve, that he believes he can make his family love him, or at least pretend.

It’s that same mindset that Sebastian inherits--“I will bend him to my will and teach my sister to love me” pretty much sums it up, although he manages to be a bit more petulant about it. Although he seems to emphatically reject Valentine, he’s become Valentine, inherited his sword, his ring, his creepy shrine-to-Jocelyn house and his mindset and view of family. The same entitlement and sense of ownership Valentine displays to Jocelyn (and in a different way, Jace), Sebastian shows to Clary (and again, to Jace).

Valentine never saw his “vision” through, but Sebastian symbolically completes his father’s vision of their family, not as a son but by becoming his father, and Clary her mother. CC emphasizes and repeats this over and over, how Clary looks like her mother and Sebastian like his father, exactly like his father. Sister Magdalena even comments on it (“Why, you look just like your parents,” when Clary expects her to comment on their difference or wonder why Clary is in the company of a murderer). One can suppose that given his feelings towards Valentine and how he always resented Valentine’s lack of approval towards him, Sebastian craves “love” more than anything--or at least, his conception of love, which we all can agree is pretty fucked up. The completion of the “family” is thus probably what Sebastian sees as fulfilling, that control and coercion is as close to love and belonging as he can understand, or that he’s experienced.

There’s a very interesting sense in which in creating the Endarkened and going on a path of world destruction, Sebastian himself loses all sense of self or free will. It always bothered me that Lilith’s blood is used to abnegate free will in the Endarkened when Lilith herself is often interpreted as a symbol of free will (and feminism--that’s a rant for another day). But there is very much a sense that the Battle of Burren is Sebastian’s moral event horizon, that in trying to rape Clary or force all free will out of her and others he cements himself as ultimately irredeemable. I’ve often complained that his motivation for destroying the world is...well, non-existent, but in a sense it reflects an erosion of person-hood, that he is less a person in himself with his own self-directed wants and goals than a shadow or echo of Valentine embracing senseless (demonic?) destruction.

I know I’m going completely off the deep end, but I recently studied Milton and although it seems pretty clear that CC is more a Virgilian than a Miltonist (tbh I really don’t think she’s read Paradise Lost because if she had, she wouldn’t stop quoting it), Milton’s conception of Lucifer is really a prototype here. One reading of Satan in PL is that the personified Sin and Death (his “offspring” so to speak) are really just solipsistic echoes of himself and his hubris, and I think there’s a very interesting sense in which Sebastian could be read in a similar way to Valentine. In many respects, to me, Jonathan represents a sum of Valentine’s greatest sins--bigotry, hatred, cruelty, pride, and really bad use of the experimental method.

I get the impression that CC struggled with Seb’s characterization in COHF, and in large part that’s because he has no character, no motivation beyond destruction and a certain rapaciousness towards Clary. As I’ve derisively said before, wanting to fuck your sister is not a sound core personality motivation for a character. The way he’s written in the books, there’s not a lot of poignancy in his character, and although people do seem to feel sympathy for “green eyed Jonathan” (uwu), he doesn’t really exist any more than Sebastian does. Although CC claims through Clary that Sebastian wants to destroy the world to make it something that can love him, what she misses is that Sebastian in COHF is not really a character but an Endarkened version of himself--a shadow. He doesn’t seem to be much of anything.

Thule is the result of that hollow destruction, an Endarkened shadow of canon, and for that reason it completes COHF in that we truly see what CC means when she says there wasn’t enough good in him left for him to live--what I think she could also mean is that there isn’t enough of Jonathan left, or there never was. Valentine aborts his development (in...many ways: stay tuned for reports from the frontlines of developmental psychopathology, which I am taking) and what’s left is a solipsistic reflection or echo not of Jonathan’s demonic parentage but of his human father. And there’s something understatedly tragic about that cycle coming to a close with Ash, with Sebastian behaving the same way towards his son as his father did to him--with callousness and a desire to exploit. CC explicitly calls this possessive, which is of course a callback to how he treats Clary, but I think he’s more reflecting the father role he inherited from Valentine.

And Ash closes that cycle by killing Sebastian--just as, I would argue, that Sebastian in some sense wanted to kill Valentine. More and more I’ve been leaning towards a reading (and I hope with absolutely no confidence that the show leans towards this reading as well) where Sebastian’s obsession with Clary is at least partly due to the fact that she has done the thing that would symbolically complete him--kill Valentine. Sebastian hasn’t killed Valentine, literally or symbolically, and the cycle repeats; in this way, Ash as a Morgenstern takes more after Clary than he does his father.

Is this edgy, pseudo-academic, piss-poor, completely incoherent bullshit? Absolutely. The point is, god is dead and if I want to compare Paradise Lost, one of the eminent works of the English canon to a YA series based on fanfiction I can. Also, Thule may suck but Sebastian did canonically destroy the world financial system so is he really that bad? (Yes).

#i love a crispy boy #this is seb meta at it's best: rambly incoherent and complete and utter unsupported bullshit #just how we like it here at seb-verlacs!!#anyway uhh #qoaad spoilers #queen of air and darkness spoilers

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chrysanthmilk · 5 years

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a guide to being death: chapter 4

by staccato

“Death is very, very tired of its Master’s strange wants and whims. This is the last time it does something he wants.”

aka: a apocalypse fix-it, featuring a master of death who has been reincarnated into a winchester. things can only go up from here.

chapter 4: bobby is surprised

read it below, or on ao3

It took a long time for them to drive to Bobby’s place, and even longer for them to convince him that yes, Dean was back and no, he’s not a demon nor a shapeshifter nor a revenant. Harry liked to think that his presence helped, but he also gladly admits that he did nothing but laugh at the look on Dean’s face when Bobby splashed him with holy water.

That is, until he himself got soaked.

Still, it’s enough to persuade Bobby, and the man lets them inside, slamming the door shut behind them. He offered them towels to dry their faces and beers to drink, chuckling when Dean downed his immediately, before grabbing Harry’s for himself.

“It’s good to see that you haven’t changed one bit, boy,” he comments ruefully, shaking his head. He takes a sip of his own beer. “Still…this don’t make a lick of sense.”

“Yeah, you’re preaching to the choir,” Dean responds.

“Dean,” Bobby says, more insistent. “Your chest were in ribbons, your insides were slop. And you’ve been buried for four months. Even if you could slip out of hell and back into your own meatsuit—”

Harry winces at the word, but Dean doesn’t seem bothered when he interrupts, “I know, I should look like a Thriller video reject,” he says casually.

A beat. “What do you remember?”

“Not much. I remember I was a Hellhound’s chew toy, and then…light’s out. Then I come to six feet under, and when I crawled out, I found Harry. That was it.”

Harry immediately realizes that Dean’s lying, lying, lying. It probably wasn’t obvious to Bobby, who, despite his statue as their father, didn’t grow up around Dean. He wasn’t there when Dean came home with a bruised cheek and an unsteady gait, and lied about fighting with a gang and ‘you should see the other guys;’ he wasn’t there when Dean came home with a wad of cash stuck inside his underwear, and lied about his great success at hustling pool; he wasn’t there when Dean came home with bags of fast food and a rumbling stomach, and lied about having already eaten on the way back.

Dean has always lied to the ones he loved.

And Harry cannot begrudge him for it.

“Sam’s number isn’t working,” he says instead, smoothly changing the conversation topic. “Would you happen to know where he is?”

Bobby shrugged. “I haven’t talked to him in four months.”

Dean narrowed his eyes. “You let him go off by himself, too? Bobby, you should’ve been looking after him.”

“Dean, I told you,” Harry interjected, annoyed that Dean was directing his anger and frustration at Bobby. Unfairly, considering all the things the man had helped them with, “Sam was dead set on it. You couldn’t have stopped him if you had been here, either.”

“I would’ve at least tried.”

“I did try,” Bobby replies. “These last months haven’t been exactly easy, you know. For him or me. We had to bury you.”

Dean sighed, looking away. “Why did you bury me, anyway?”

“I wanted you salted and burned. Usual drill. But…Sam wouldn’t have it.”

“Well, I’m glad he won that one,” Dean replied weakly. He took a swig of his beer, swiping his mouth clean roughly with the sleeve of his shirt.

“He said you’d need a body when he got you back home somehow,” Bobby added.

Dean furrowed his brows, and leaned forward in his seat. “What do you mean?”

“He was quiet, real quiet. And then he just took off. Wouldn’t return any of my calls. I tried to find him, but he didn’t want to be found.”

Dean and Harry exchange a look, both of them coming to the same conclusion. “Oh damn it, Sammy.”

“What?”

While Dean explained his theory to Bobby, Harry excused himself outside to have a smoke—“it’s been a stressful day, Bobby. Just one stick, I promise”—and, unknown to them, have a little chat with Julian, who denied his suspicions.

“Oh, he definitely tried,” Julian reported, chuckling softly. “But the demons had their orders.”

Harry grimaced. Of course. Michael, Lucifer, Lilith, and whoever else are involved in this scheme must have predicted that Sam would try to bargain for Dean’s soul with his own, and would have forbade their underlings from allowing him to do so. The Righteous Man must spill the first blood for the Apocalypse to begin, after all. Dean Winchester couldn’t be rescued from Hell until after the fact.

“But you already knew it was the angel, Master,” Julian continued, dipping an onion ring into his sauce.

“I just wanted to check he didn’t make any other deal,” Harry replied, answering the unspoken question. “Stopping the Apocalypse is already difficult enough. I don’t want to have to worry about my little brother’s soul on top of that.”

“You plan to stop it then, Master?”

“Of course.”

Julian hummed. “Humanity has changed you, Master.”

Harry rolled his eyes, aware of what Julian was referring to. When he had been Death, he hadn’t particularly cared about the Apocalypse. Angels and humans and Earth—those had all been Chuck’s creations. If he wished to preordain a battle between Lucifer and Michael, fought in their respective vessels and possibly destroying Earth in the process, well. That was entirely his business, not Harry’s. At most, he would have just grumbled about the extra work. But now…

“Dean and Sam are my brothers,” he said. “I can’t just stand aside and let them be killed.”

“Death is a natural part of life,” Julian pointed out. “One day, even you and I will die. Even God will die.”

“But none of this is natural!” Harry retorted. “Angels and demons have been interfering with their lives—with the lives of their ancestors—since the beginning of time! Even now, they’re going to play at God and force the Apocalypse to start.”

“As it was prophesized.”

“Screw prophecies,” Harry hissed, not bothering to hide the resentment in his tone.

Julian cocked his head. Ate another onion ring. “God will be quite angry with you for interfering with his plans.”

“Then he can come here and tell me himself,” Harry said. “Have you seen him anywhere, by the way?”

Julian shook his head. “Not since before you fell.”

Harry sucked his bottom lip in worry. “What the hell is that bastard doing?”

“Doing whatever is good, I suppose,” Julian said. “He is God, isn’t he?”

Harry frowned at him. “You know, Julian, I don’t think I’m the only one who’s changed.”

“How do you mean?”

“Before I fell, you would’ve never argued with me like this. Really, I remember you as being quite meek.”

There was pause. “I suppose,” Julian said slowly, “that you might be right.”

“Perhaps it isn’t humanity that changes us, but the experiences we had. My experiences as a human changed me, as did your experiences as Death.”

“An interesting proposition, Master. Alas, I’m afraid we’ll have to cut this conversation short. Your brother is coming.”

Julian disappeared just as Dean rounded the corner, Bobby following behind him. “Hey. You done smoking your cigarette yet?”

“Of course. Just taking a little breather before I have to go back and deal with you,” Harry responded. “Everything alright?”

“We tracked Sam down,” Dean said. “He’s in Pontiac, Illinois.”

Harry blinked. “Isn’t that where you were buried?”

“And right where I popped up. Hell of a coincidence, don’t you think?”

#harry potter #supernatural #apocalypse fix-it #fanfic #ao3 #agtbd

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miss-m-and-her-blog · 7 years

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He’s My Girl (Prologue)

TITLE OF STORY: He’s My Girl

CHAPTER: (Prologue)

AUTHOR: miss-m-and-her-blog

WHICH TOM/CHARACTER: AU Actor!Tom

GENRE: Romance, Action, Drama

FIC SUMMARY: He’s a guy, she’s a boy in disguise. He’s an actor, she’s a stuntman or -woman. How can it ever work when the famous Tom Hiddleston stars in an action film, with Charlie or Charlene as his stunt choreographer?

RATING: T

WARNINGS/TRIGGERS/AUTHORS NOTES: The character Charlene is a mixed-raced Korean (She’s part Chinese-Filipino and Korean), and her looks are inspired from actress Jessica Henwick, because look at her at the picture below, she’s just divine, isn’t she? ^_^

FEEDBACK/COMMENTS: The readers went through with me with Mr. Perfect, and now here’s another one ^_^ I hope that the readers will like it :D Thanks very much and always, lovelots! <3

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It is an unusually hot November day, and the sun has shone all day there on Lockley Studios. The pre-production of their newest action film titled, The Last Deal is ongoing and they are looking for stunt performers or choreographers that can keep up with the action sequences of the film.

Meanwhile, at the other side of the studio stands the trailers of the stars casted for the film; there at the end of the lane stood the trailer of the leading man, Tom Hiddleston.

He was re-reading the script as he is internalizing his character, John Hicks; a retiring assassin who has been hired to take one last job that will wedge him between a war with the Triads and the Yakuza.

The PA beside him heard him sigh, “Wow, this is some heavy stuff.”

His PA, a middle-aged woman named Angie asked, “Why so?”

Tom pointed at the script, “John’s backstory is just-- very heavy. I mean, he went on being an assassin when he turned 16, just after his parents were killed in front of him. All of the rage and angst, this guy has it.”

Angie patted his shoulder, “Be glad that’s he’s just a character.”

Tom chuckled and shook his head. Once again, he’s being so invested in a character that he forgets that he is not the person in the script.

Suddenly, a prod. assistant knocked and opened the trailer door.

“Tom? The stunt performers for audition, they’re here. You wanted me to let you know when they arrive.”

He stood up and replied giddily, “Oh yes. Where are they? Where’s the audition happening?”

“Studio 4. Are you coming?”

Tom looked back at Angie, “Yes. I’ll come with you. Maybe I could also choose a stunt trainer from them.”

The man nodded with a smile and Tom followed him out of the trailer.

He almost swore to himself for not bringing something to cover him because the Californian sun felt like it would melt his skin off. But as they trekked the mile long way to the studio, Tom didn’t bothered to think about the heat.

When they arrived at Studio 4, a very large warehouse that can contain two tennis courts or three basketball courts, stood mightily at the center of Lockley Studios. He was lead on at the main entrance, and the moment he entered, every crewmen or production assistant were in a large circle and are watching something in the middle.

“What’s happening?” Tom asked as he could also hear people cheering on what was happening at the center.

“You have to see this, Tom. It’s like a cage fight inside that circle.” A camera crewman encouraged him.

His eyebrow raised and he felt curious. Why does an audition for a stunt performer needed to be a cage fight?

The production assistant lead him closer to the circle and also up front so he could see what was happening. When he got there, he was offered a seat beside the film’s executive producer, Andy Lockley and the director, George Weissman.

Both men saw Tom and they shook his hand and he sat in the middle of them to watch the spectacle that had started in the audition.

“What’s really happening?” Tom asked again, now at George.

“An audition. But you have to watch this. These guys from the Philippines have prepared something cool for us to see.” He confidently pointed out to Tom.

Tom could only shake his head and turn his attention at the middle of the circle.

For a while, all was cheering when four tall and muscled men came out and stood out like they are the corners of a box. They looked so ferocious that Tom thought that he wouldn’t want to get in a fight with them. But what happened next was that a girl, also a Filipino, stood in the middle of them.

The crowd cheered louder as if they are in MMA fight that time and Tom couldn’t understand what was about to happen. He was worried that the girl might get hurt with this mock fight that they are going to do.

The girl nodded at the men around her, and there, the fight begun.

All at once, the men attacked her and with a swift motion, she ducked and evaded them. Tom felt so surprised as he saw the girl punch and kick the men as if she is as strong as them.

Her acrobatic moves were formidable and he just couldn’t believe his eyes that the girl who looked so fragile and innocent a minute ago is now battling those behemoth of men with her moves.

Once again, the crewmen roared with cheer and shouted everything when the girl was caught in a headlock by one of the men.

Finish her! One shouted, and Tom cringed.

What is this? A pit fight? Are you fucking kidding me? He thought to himself.

In all truth, Tom is rooting for the girl to come out of the mock fight unscathed or at least unhurt. Until then, the girl got out of the headlock and she effortlessly held the man in a leg lock which took the man down.

The other stuntmen didn’t dared move her or she will break the man’s arm joints, and so, he tapped the mat beneath them; surrendering to the girl.

Tom sighed in relief as the mock fight was done. But the glee in Andy and George’s face were still there. They are amused, but he could see something in Andy--something else.

The stuntmen lined up and took a bow as the crowd cheered at them. The noise only died down when Andy stood up to say something,

“You have done a good job, guys. That’s a very good showcase of your talents. All of you, can join the production-- except, you.”

And he pointed at the girl, and her eyes widened with shock. Tom was baffled, then the girl spoke,

“I’m sorry?” Her voice sounded delicate, just like how she looks.

“We’re not hiring you, babe.” Andy nonchalantly told her.

She was breathing heavily and she took steps forward to ask again, “Why? Have I done something wrong?”

Andy, brushed his whiskers and said, “We don’t hire women on this kind of job here in Lockley Studios. And anyways, you look like a toothpick that can be easily snapped into two-- how old are you anyway? 15?”

Tom saw the girl blush with embarrassment but she managed to reply, “I’m 24, Mr. Lockley. And I can do stunts just as much these guys can.” She replied defiantly but still with respect.

“Still no, baby girl. I’m sorry. Only the guys are hired.” And he gestured with his hands saying No.

With all of this happening, Tom had his jaw clenched. He couldn’t say anything at the moment, because Andy is the executive producer of this film.

Misogynist prick. Is he afraid that a girl can do it? He quietly thought to himself.

And with that, the audition ended.

“Let’s wrap up it, people. Congratulations to the men.” Andy spoke lastly.

The crowd left one by one, but the girl remained standing at the middle, still breathing heavily. One of the men gave her a sad look and tapped her shoulder. But she looked away from him.

George left and so did Andy, but Tom was left standing from his seat. He saw that the girl was about to sob but she only drummed her chest and turned away so no one would see her tears.

Tom wanted to run for her or at least say something to comfort her. He knows what it feels like to have a door shut at someone’s face, and he experienced it when he is just beginning in the show business.

But she walked away fast that he couldn’t chase her down anymore. Instead, he now wants to confront Andy for his rejection. He turned around and he walked briskly, trying to reach Andy amidst the crowd exiting the studio.

“Andy! Andy, wait!” He shouted, but suddenly, he felt a hand hold his arm and stop him.

It was Julian Tanner, his stunt double from previous films that he had done that eventually became his friend.

“Don’t, Tom. Andy will never listen to you.” He begged him.

“How would you know?” Tom spatted at him.

“I know. I’ve worked for him a couple of times and I just know that he doesn’t listen.” Julian tried to calm Tom down.

He inhaled sharply and scratched the back of his head. “When did you arrived, man?” Tom asked Julian.

“A little while, but I saw all of it.”

Tom tried to dismiss his frustration, then he replied, “Buy me a drink, will you? Just so I could forget this for a moment?”

“Sure. Come on, man.” Julian replied with a smile.

And then they left the scene to get out of the studio for a while.

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A black Chevrolet SUV pulled out of the parkway of the studios and the first person to come out of it is the leading lady of the film and also the director’s niece; the actress Paula Weissman.

She is the epitome of a Hollywood beauty; long blonde curls, perfect heart-shaped face and to top it off, a perfect body. But actually, underneath the face lies the attitude of a spoiled Primadonna that she carefully don’t show to her fans.

Her assistant, Gwen, stood quickly beside her with an umbrella on hand.

“Ugh, Gwen, the heat!” She complained to her assistant who scurried and opened the umbrella and enclose Paula inside the shade.

They started to walk towards the main building of Lockley Studios as her uncle would meet them there.

Then she asked Gwen something, “Where’s Tom? Did he said anything?”

Gwen struggled to talk as she held up the umbrella while holding four bags that Paula owns, “He just went out with his friend, Julian, but Angie told me that he would be here in 20.”

“Good. Keep up, girl, we don’t want to be late.” She barked at Gwen, and they continued walking into the main building.

At the other side of the building, the girl who was rejected in the audition is sitting at a quiet spot surrounded by tropical plants and a simple stone trail at the back of the main building.

Her name is Charlene Lee. And she had done every work possible all her life, because of her ailing father, Lee Bo-Gyeong, but he had unfortunately passed away a year ago.

She could feel the strain in her muscles as she sat with her knees up on her chest. The six-month training for that routine had almost killed her because of the rigorous effort that she had put on it; only to be rejected and even humiliated.

Somehow at this moment she is wishing again what she have wished all her life; that if only she was born a man, then all of her problems might be solved.

Charlene bowed her head on her knees and there she felt her tears fall down.

I’m sorry, Papa. I always let you down. She mournfully thought.

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Tom and Julian had just got back to the studio and Tom was informed by one of Gwen’s assistant that Paula has also arrived. When the PA left, Julian gave Tom a knowing look.

“What? Paula and I are friends.” Tom replied with a giggle.

Julian shrugged, “I’m not saying anything, man. But from what I saw from the tabloids, she’s cozy with you.”

Then Tom remembered that time they were photographed by the paparazzi; spotted holding hands in Venice Beach, two weeks ago.

“Well, what’s wrong with that? I’m single, she’s single. She’s been through a bad breakup-”

Then Julian continued, “And you’ve also been from a bad breakup.”

Tom laughed as it is true, and it has been a year ago since the last time he dated someone and it certainly didn’t end up well.

They went into the reception area of the building then into a lounge with a bar, where he saw Paula waiting and sitting over a couch. She was wearing a maroon dress with intricate lacing which brought up the honey color to her blonde hair. Tom smiled as soon as their eyes meet.

Julian then nudged him, “I’ll leave you to it, man.”

Tom went over her and the other people that she was talking to, noticed him. One of them is the scriptwriter then the costume designer for the film. They were just catching up with Paula and asking her if she is comfortable with her role for the film.

And her role, actually, is the person that the Triads and Yakuza are looking for because her character is a hacker who have stolen some important data from both parties and has set to have the two syndicate to go at each other.

Then, it would be Tom’s character to save Paula’s character only to have an intimate connection with her.

Tom sat beside Paula and they greeted each other with a kiss on a cheek.

“What took you so long?” Paula whispered to him.

“I’ve been with Julian. When did you get here?” He whispered back and they both looked like conversing with a secret that only the two of them knows about.

“An hour ago. Let’s talk somewhere more private. I’ll meet you at the back of the main building.” She insinuated, then Paula left the circle.

Before walking down the hall, she looked back at Tom to give him a very seducing side-eye.

Tom felt something jolt inside him, and thought, That’s a girl I want to date.

He followed her after a while; Tom saw her walking down a staircase ahead of him and now walking towards the back exit that leads to the outside garden.

When he also got to the exit, he saw the bushy part of the back of the main building, with a long shed and benches all over the lane. He saw her standing and waiting for him.

“Come, Tom. Walk with me. There’s no one else here.” Paula invited him.

Tom stood beside her but instead of taking her hand, he kissed her deeply.

Paula didn’t held back as she placed her arms around his neck and pulled him to give back kisses. But little did they knew, someone was witnessing that scene, and it was Charlene who had just wiped her tears away.

“What? Of all the place?” She muttered.

When they were done pecking each other, Charlene saw that they are going towards where she is, and if they saw her there; they might suspect her that she is snooping around.

And so, before they could walk further, she hid herself in the bush so they won’t see her.

Yeah, great, Cha. Nice work on hiding yourself. She thought as the leaves brushed on her mouth and face.

Tom wrapped his arm around Paula’s shoulder as they started to walk over the bushy lane.

“So how’s you weekend?” Tom asked Paula.

“It’s okay. I got my hair done, you see. I read the scripts, all that stuff. How about you?” Paula then turned to him.

“Me? I was thinking about you the whole time.” Tom whispered and Paula smirked.

But now, they are approaching the spot where Charlene is hiding. And of all the time that something unfortunate could happen, it happened right there and then to Charlene; she saw a centipede crawling over her shoes and was slowly making its way to the ends of her jeans.

Shit. NO! Go away! She panicked as she tried to shake away the centipede.

Right then, Tom and Paula are now standing directly in front of her and only the bush are concealing her from them.

Then, the most embarrassing happened; the centipede went inside her jeans and Charlene responded to what she can only do, to jump around and shake down the centipede.

But then, she jumped out of the bushes to which startled Tom and Paula.

Paula shrieked and then she fell down on her rear in the pavement while Tom was startled.

Charlene kept jumping around but she couldn’t see the centipede crawl out from her jeans. But, she was not ready when she saw both of them looking at her; Tom was puzzled but Paula’s eyes narrowed in anger.

“What the fuck were you doing, hiding in that bush?! Are you a paparazzi or a desperate reporter?” Paula shouted at her as soon as she got up.

Tom had his brows furrowed but he tried to restrain Paula from attacking the girl. Then for a while, he recognized her.

“You’re the girl earlier; on the audition.” Tom pointed.

“I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Charlene shyly mumbled.

“What were you doing there?” Tom asked calmly but Paula looked so angry that her cheeks and forehead were red.

“I saw the both of you walk towards here--and I didn’t wanted to interrupt, so I hid myself here... But a centipede got into my jeans.”

Paula placed her hands on her waist and tried to look tall, even though Charlene is actually a head taller than her.

“Ha-ha, what a very plausible excuse. You’re a paparazzi, show me where you hid your camera.” Paula accused her and she even went on frisking Charlene to which Tom stopped her.

“Paula, please. I’m sure she didn’t wanted to be rude so that’s why she hid herself.” Tom said to calm Paula’s nerves down.

Then he approached Charlene, not with anger or fierceness, but with gentleness that she felt something so strange.

“I’m also sorry if Paula scolded at you. But please, don’t do it again. You can go now.” Tom then looked at her sincerely in the eyes.

For a moment, Charlene wanted to go, but when she saw his big blue eyes; looking so serene and heart-stopping, she froze where she is standing. But she snapped out of it and Charlene ran away from the both of them.

She kept running until she reached the second studio that is beside the main building. There, she turned her back at the wall and breathed heavily from running.

“That guy-- who is he? He’s...” And her words trailed off and she remembered his eyes again.

Finally, the centipede crawled away from her ankle to which she kicked away from her.

Charlene was sure that her heartbeat is pounding fast because she ran, but she can feel butterflies in her stomach whenever she remembers that man.

He’s very handsome. And so-- kind. She thought.

She reached for her cheeks and she felt it to be so hot and flustered. Charlene assured herself that it is because she ran, but maybe, she is blushing and it is that man’s fault.

“No way.” She whispered.

Charlene could only wonder, would she ever meet him again?

TITLE OF STORY: He’s My Girl

CHAPTER: (Prologue)

AUTHOR: miss-m-and-her-blog

WHICH TOM/CHARACTER: AU Actor!Tom

GENRE: Romance, Action, Drama

RATING: T

FEEDBACK/COMMENTS: The readers went through with me with Mr. Perfect, and now here’s another one ^_^ I hope that the readers will like it :D Thanks very much and always, lovelots! <3

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