Married Sanuso won't leave my mind.
A 50 y/o Sanji running the Baratie after Zeff's death while his 48 y/o husband Usopp is the one helping him cultivate most of his ingredients and also tells all the clients about their past adventures with Monkey D. Luffy. They're all always captivated and entertained by Usopp's way with words and storytelling skills, so Sanji lets him do whatever he wants as long as he doesn't keep the clients too distracted. They don't always stay there, of course, they use any chance they can get to go on trips too and visit all the people they love, even if Sanji doesn't seem to be capable (physically) of leaving the restaurant for long (he's always worried somebody might need food urgently, and who is Usopp to keep Sanji from following his passion? As long as he doesn't overwork himself...). They're all doing their own stuff, but the crew comes by regularly to eat there and have a good time together, always staying past closing time and having a private party only for them. For old times' sake.
Sanji has longer hair now. Wavy. Reaches past his shoulders and he often needs to wear a ponytail to cook, but Usopp just loves it way more when it's undone and messy after a long day of working. His goatee is longer now but it still isn't a beard, he just styles it so he can braid it like his father used to do. Zeff would call him sentimental, but Sanji thinks it's nice to remember him this way. He might look like he's more exhausted than ever, but he has never been more relaxed and happier in his entire life. His whole body is covered with scars from his past. Scars he doesn't regret and remembers fondly and others he would rather forget but, knowing he won't, he just lets the future do its thing and leave them behind. When the future is being a bit of a bastard and attacks him back with nightmares and memories, Usopp is always there to hold him and bring him back to the present. So it's alright, even if the scars still hurt, because Usopp is always there to catch him if they bring him down. He wears his wedding ring in his left hand and he's always staring at it while cooking. Sometimes he considers wearing it as a necklace instead because he often gets distracted by it, but he wouldn't have it any other way and he knows that the only right place for his ring to rest is on his fingers, protecting his hands and, at the same time, his heart.
Usopp now wears dreads like his father, but longer. Way longer hair than he used to. Sanji keeps lending him hair ties because he forgets how bothersome it can get to have such long hair, and somehow he always loses them in between all of his inventions (in the workshop Sanji asked Franky to make connected to the Baratie so Usopp could do his own things too). He wants to grow a beard but it always seems too short for him and he can't make it grow longer, but his husband says he looks extremely hot anyway and it'd be bothersome to kiss otherwise, so Usopp is happy like this. Usopp has never been more motivated to work. He spends his day at the workshop, telling stories to the clients or helping Sanji in the kitchen (because he now knows a few things about cooking). It's a dream come true, being able to rest but keep creating and going on adventures whenever they want. Nami has helped him tattoo some stuff on his arms and chest. Nothing too eccentric but cool enough to catch people's attention (his own designs!). Most people ask about them, and if you're one of the lucky ones, he'll tell you what each tattoo means, usually leading to one of the Strawhat's most crucial adventures. His ring is something everybody knows about because he won't shut up about it. He keeps showing it to everybody who passes by and dares to say something about him or his husband. And then he always mentions Franky and how he was the one to make their wedding rings.
They live peacefully. Kind of. Sort of. It's hard to do so when you're from the crew of the King of the Pirates. A lot of people come by to challenge them to duels, and even if Usopp really wants to show off sometimes, Sanji is just a bit too done with that because they always make such a mess in his restaurant... Whatever. It's not like the fights last long anyway. Poor souls that try to fight them. A lot of girls, actually, try to get in between them too, and Sanji hasn't changed a bit. He's aged like fine wine and he's one of Luffy's wings, not to mention he's also the best cook known and he was the one to find the All Blue. So... A lot of women are into him (his money. His status. His reputation. His abilities. His past) and he's too weak to say no to them, so Usopp has to keep an eye on him sometimes. He's easily manipulated by women and the only girl Usopp allows to do that is Nami. But it's alright, really. They live a very calm life, despite the small details like random fights and women trying to break their relationship (impossible. Even if Usopp wasn't there to stop them, Sanji has his limits and he would never disrespect his husband like that). Sanji cooks. Usopp creates. All the paintings around the restaurant were painted by Usopp, and Sanji couldn't be prouder, always telling customers about it with the brightest of smiles.
They love the word "husband". "Mari". Whatever they're in the mood for. They keep loving each other like the first day, and arguing like they were still teenagers. But the way they love has so many years behind (years of longing. Of desperation. Of friendship. Of growth) that every year it feels warmer. Like home. Sanji plays with Usopp's ring when they're going to bed. It helps him fall asleep. Usopp holds his hands close to his chest to keep them safe. He's still not taller than Sanji but he's wider now. A bit bigger. And Sanji wants to melt and sleep in between his arms forever, even if he knows they'll wake up tangled up and snoring, with Usopp's feet hanging from the bed while Sanji's hair gets in his mouth in the middle of the night.
They never let go of each other's hands, though. That's something they won't allow even if they're asleep.
And they always wake up to the sound of their rings together. It doesn't matter who wakes up first, it's their way of telling the other they're there. They're safe. That they can wake up knowing they aren't alone. If Sanji wakes up first, he kisses Usopp's face while tapping on his ring with his own. And if Usopp is the one to wake up first, he does the same, except his kisses land on Sanji's hands instead.
They used to do this too when they were only teenagers aboard the Sunny, Sanji remembers. Just not with the rings. He kept imagining them there, though, every time, but they weren't there.
And now that they are, he can't imagine a world in which he doesn't wake up next to the stupid sniper he calls his husband.
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
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i've seen a couple people in the notes of this very good post about fictional polyamory by @thebibliosphere say things along the lines of "oh, i've been doing it wrong :(" or "how do i know if i did this right??" or "i should probably give up and start over, i wrote this badly :(" and. no!!!!
(i AM seeing far MORE people say "oh, this clarified and helped me so much, i think i know how to fix issues i've been having with my own story" which. YES!!!!)
listen. if you're a monogamous person who's writing a polyamorous relationship, and you've been focusing mainly on The Triad and All Three Together All The Time as the endgame, that's literally fine. that's a perfectly acceptable and strong starting point for your plotting, imo. you do not need to give up on a story that you've started like this.
but the things discussed in the post Can and Should improve your execution!
you can keep the same plot beats and overall relationship arc 100%. polyamorous relationships are infinite in their formations, every one is unique. "basically a monogamous romance but with three people" Does exist, as a relationship type. you're not hashtag Misrepresenting (TM) poly people with it
BUT i do think it will help to read up on some poly people talking about how their relationships Differ from monogamous ones.
so i have outlined some basic important concepts about polyamory.
MORE IMPORTANTLY though, i've broken down some questions that you can answer throughout the writing process to strengthen your individual dyad relationships, your individual characterization, & your characters' individual feelings/experiences. this is a writing resource have fun
future kitkat butting in to say i spent over two hours writing this and it definitely needs a readmore. it is also NOT comprehensive. but everything should be pretty simple to follow! feel free to reblog if you find it helpful yourself or just want to reward me for how gotdan long this took KSLDKFJKDL.
i've grabbed quick links for a couple of the important concepts, some have SEO pitches in them but the info largely seems to be good. (if i missed anything Egregiously Gross on these sites i should be able to update the links with better ones later, since they're under the readmore.)
sidenote: this is NOT meant to be overwhelming, despite the length. if you can't read all of this, that's Okay. you do not need to give up on your writing.
here we go:
compersion!
compersion is a BIG thing in a lot of polyamorous relationships. it's joy derived from seeing two (or more) of your partners happy together, or joy derived from seeing your partner happy with someone else.
compersion is really important as a concept because it highlights that every individual relationship within a polycule is different -- and that that's a GOOD thing. it's sort of the inverse of jealousy.
by the "inverse of jealousy," i mean that instead of feeling left out and upset and possessive, you feel happy/joyous/content.
i can use personal experience as an example: it's a Relief for me when my partners receive joy/support/sex/romance/etc that i can't (or prefer not to) give them. and i love seeing my partners make each other laugh and be silly together.
it's 100% okay for a poly triad not to be together 100% of the time, it doesn't mean that the third member is being left out or not treated equally when two people do things alone together.
(i have individual dates with my partners all the time! PLUS larger 3-and-4-person date nights.)
if the third member DOES feel jealous or left out, then the polycule can have a conversation to figure out what needs/wants aren't being met, and solve that. this happens semi-regularly in my polycule, as it will happen in any relationship (including monogamous ones)! it's just part of being an adult, sometimes you have to talk about feelings.
metamours!
a metamour is someone who is dating your partner, but ISN'T dating you. this may not be relevant for people writing closed three-person romantic sexual triads, but it's a super helpful term to know.
the linked article also lists different types of metamour relationships with some fun phrasing i hadn't heard before. the tl;dr is: sometimes you'll be domestic cohabitation friends, sometimes you'll be buddies with your own friendship, sometimes you might not interact much outside of parties, every relationship is different.
there's no one-size-fits-all requirement for metamour relationships. sometimes polyamorous people will end up dating their metamour after a while (has happened to me), sometimes polyamorous people will break up with one partner for normal life reasons, but remain friendly metamours.
the goal of polyamory is NOT for EVERYONE to fall in love. it is 100% okay if this happens in your story, it happens in real life too! but it is also 100% okay for characters to be metamours without ever becoming "more than friends."
(sidenote: try to kill any internalized "more than" that you have when it comes to friendship. friends are just as important and special and vital as partners.)
of course there are a million ways for messiness to occur with metamours within a complex polycule, exactly like with close-knit platonic friend groups. however this post is not about that! there's enough "here's how polyamory can go wrong" stuff out there already, so i'm focusing on the positives here :)
open versus closed polyamorous relationships!
i'm struggling to find an online article that reflects my experience without directly contradicting at least SOME stuff. so i'll give a quick rundown
google has a bunch of conflicting definitions of open relationships and whether open relationships are different from polyamory. the general consensus seems to be that an open relationship prioritizes one partnership (often a marriage), but that each partner can have extraneous flings or long-term commitments (most often sexual in nature).
this is not typically how i use the term wrt polyamory. the poly concept is pretty simple. a closed polyamorous relationship is one with boundaries like a monogamous one. there are multiple partners in the polycule, but they are not interested in having anybody new join said polycule.
an open polyamorous relationship tends to be more flexible -- it just means that IF someone in the polycule develops mutual feelings for a new person, it's fine for them to become part of said polycule if they want to! the relationship/person is open to newcomers.
some groups will need to negotiate this all together, others will just go "haha, you kids have fun." just depends on the individuals!
with open AND closed polyamorous relationships, the most important thing is making sure that there's respectful communication and that everyone is on the same page. but there's no one-size-fits-all way to do that.
i wish i could give you guys a prescriptive "You Must Do It This Way" guide, but that's.... basically the opposite of what polyamory is about, HAHA.
feelings for multiple people!
i was gonna tack this on to the previous section but decided it warranted its own lil bit.
a defining feature (....i'm told?) of monogamous relationships is that a monogamous person only has feelings for One individual at a time. they only want a relationship with one individual at a time. or, if they DO have feelings for multiple people simultaneously, they're still only comfortable dating one person at a time & being exclusive with that one person.
this is perfectly fine!
the poly experience is generally different from this. but once again..... polyamorous people all have different individual perspectives on this.
for me, i have never been able to draw hard boxes around romantic vs sexual vs platonic relationships, & i love many people at once. my personal polycule lacks many strict definitions beyond "these are my chosen people, i want to forge a life with them indefinitely, whatever shape that life takes"
some poly people feel explicit romantic or sexual attraction to multiple people at once, some poly people feel almost no romantic or sexual attraction at all. i'd say that MOST poly people feel different things for different partners, which is not a bad thing!
some poly people are even monogamous-leaning -- they have just chosen one romantic partner who is themselves part of a larger polycule. (so this monogamous-leaning person has at least one metamour!)
or alternatively, they might have one romantic partner AND a qpr, or other ways of defining relationships. (this is a factor in my own polycule!)
i made this its own point because if you're writing a straightforward triad, this is unlikely to come up in the story itself -- but it's worth thinking about how your characters develop/handle feelings outside of their partnerships.
like, is this sort of a soulmateship, 'these are the only ones for me' type deal? in which they won't fall in love with anyone else, and can be fairly certain of that?
that's pretty close to typical monogamous standards but you Can make it work. just be thoughtful with it
alternatively, can you see any of these characters falling in love Again after the happily-ever-after? and how would the triad approach it, if so? what would they all need to talk about beforehand, and what feelings would everybody have about the situation?
it's worth considering these questions even if the hypothetical will never feature in your actual canon, because knowing the answers to these questions will help you understand all of the individuals & their relationship(s) MUCH better.
i've been typing this for nearly two hours and there's a lot more i COULD say because... there's just a lot to say. i'll close out with some quick questions that you can ask yourself when developing the dyad dynamics within your triad
first, take a page and create a separate section for each individual dyad. then answer these questions for every pair:
how does each pair act when alone?
how do they act differently alone compared to when they're with their third partner?
are there any elements of this dyad (romantic, sexual, financial, domestic, etc) that these two people DON'T have with the third partner?
if so, what are they?
are there any boundaries or hard limits within this dyad that aren't shared with the third partner?
if so, what are they?
partner 3 goes out of town alone for a few weeks. what are the remaining two doing in their absence?
(doesn't have to be anything special, it's just to get a sense of how the two interact on a day-by-day basis without the third there)
what is something that each partner in the dyad admires about the other -- that they DON'T necessarily see in the third partner?
what problem do These Two Specifically need to solve in the story before their relationship will work?
how is that problem DIFFERENT from the problems being solved within the other two dyads?
doing this for ALL THREE dyads is VITAL imo. that way, you develop complex and nuanced and different relationships that all have unique dynamics.
those questions should be enough to get you started, i hope
then After you've charted the differences in relationships, you can start to jot down similarities in the overarching triad. what does one person admire in Both of their partners? what are activities that all three like to do together? what are boundaries or discussions that all three share?
but the main goal is to figure out how to Differentiate each relationship!
a polycule is only as strong as the individual relationships within it. if two people are struggling with their own relationship, adding a third person won't fix that.
(UNLESS the third person is the catalyst for those two to, like, Actually Communicate And Work Their Shit Out. i just mean that the old adage of "maybe if we just add a third-" works about as well to fix a miserable non-communicative marriage as, uh, "maybe if we have a baby-")
AND FINALLY.
if you're not sure whether your poly romance reads organically to poly people, you can hire a sensitivity reader with poly experience. if you can't afford that, you can read up on polyamorous resources like a glossary of terms & articles actually written by poly people. (and stories written by poly people!)
you can also just.... ask poly people questions, if they're open to it. i like talking about polyamory and my own relationships so you're welcome to send asks if u want, i just can't guarantee i'll answer bc my energy levels fluctuate a lot and i don't always have time.
polyamorous people are in an uphill battle for positive representation right now & so the LAST thing i want to see is authors giving up on their stories bc they're worried about getting things Wrong. well-meaning and positive stories that treat this kind of love as normal, healthy, & aspirational are So So So Needed. even if you guys end up with some funky-feeling details.
seriously, if you're monogamous then you probably don't have a full idea of Just How Nasty a lot of people can get about polyamory. i wish it DIDN'T mean so much for you guys to want to write nice stories about us, but it does mean a lot. and it means a lot that you want to do it WELL.
in conclusion. this is not a prescriptive guide, it's just a way to raise questions. and also, you all are doing FINE.
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I will never love any interpretation of Ghost, Hollow and Hornet more than I love the interpretation of them being ultimately good, fighting for peace for everyone around them, caring deeply for Hallownest (or what remains of Hallownest at least) and caring deeply for each other and peace for their family at last.
I love kind Ghost.
Ghost who goes out of the way to gift flowers to lonely bugs.
Ghost who will rescue Zote whenever given the opportunity, without thanks or any form of reward.
Ghost who rescues grubs because they are trapped and crying to be freed.
Ghost who despite having limited ability of expression, will find some way to convey appreciation for others. (Sitting beside them. Listening to them talk or sing. Bowing out of respect.)
Ghost who is excited when in the company of good friends.
Ghost who spares the life of the nailsmith.
Ghost who mourns the loss of those fallen.
Ghost who eventually remembers their past, remembers being abandoned by their sibling, and still chooses to fight, to do everything that it takes, to free the hollow knight. To put an end to their suffering. To take Hollow's place, or to die.
There is no reward for this. There is nothing to gain. Ultimately Ghost is willing to suffer forever or to die in order to give others peace.
Ghost makes many many mistakes, and can make selfish or reckless decisions, but ultimately, Ghost is forgiving and loving.
I love Hollow who genuinely wants the people of Hallownest to be at peace. (Ironically just wanting that alone made it impossible for Hollow to grant them that peace.
But still, Hollow wants that.)
Hollow who loves Hallownest. Who loves their father and who loves his kingdom.
Hollow who is relentless in protecting it. Who would suffer for over a hundred years protecting whatever there is that can possibly be saved.
Hollow who has had the radiance influencing it all that time. The radiance who hates the king, who hates his people. Who tried to convince it to hate them to.
Hollow who loves them regardless.
Who feels empathy for everyone. Who understands their suffering more than anyone and wants nothing more than for them to have peace.
Hollow who, after finally being freed, chooses to live a kind life. To be understanding and gentle.
Who has every right to be bitter and angry and closed off, but who, after finally receiving the opportunity to live, to actually live, chooses to find everything good left in the world that they fought so hard for.
Hollow who learns to love openly and to no longer be afraid.
Hollow who is eventually excited to be able to express love in small ways.
Hollow is stalwart and just. But kind.
Hornet who, despite everything that she went through, despite losing so much, nearly everything, continues to stand and to fight for life because it still matters to her.
Hornet who fights to honor those that she lost, especially her mother.
Hornet who is hesitant to be hopeful, but is hopeful anyway.
Hornet who is hesitant to form any friendships out of fear that she will lose them, But who longs for friendship, for family..
Hornet who is proud of her siblings, who loves them despite not wanting to, who feels guilt knowing that the fate of the kingdom must rely on them.
Hornet who will rush in to assist her siblings in their final battle, knowing that she may very well die.
Hornet who, after given the opportunity to be with her siblings again, wants nothing more than to help them heal. For them all to heal.
Hornet who loves and is loved in return.
Ghost and Hollow who love, and are loved in return.
A little broken family that understands each other, understands that nothing that happened to any of them was fair, and who forgive each other, who love each other because after all this time..
They finally can.
Not one of them is without their (sometimes severe) flaws. Not one of them isn't damaged after everything that has happened.
And still they choose love.
This quote by Mary Shelley captures my interpretations of the siblings perfectly.~
"Life, although it may only be an accumulation of anguish, is dear to me, and I will defend it”
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