#i can be such a sap but truly getting back on tumblr wasn’t on my bingo card for 2023 but im so grateful

[daddy-long-legssss]

happy new year to all the lovely and amazing folks on here. coming onto this space and sharing pictures of am, tlsp, miles and reading the hilarious tags is a highlight in my day. i also wanted to say a HUGE thank you to all the insanely talented fic writers and artists in the fandom. reading fic has been an escape for me and a pocket of joy amidst all the craziness of life. i hope 2024 brings love, happiness and peace for each and everyone of you 💞💖

[jadegrey711]

I Wasn’t Expecting That (Part 2)

Eric Northman X Fem!Reader

A/N: Hello my loves! So a while back I posted the first part of this oneshot with Eric Northman and I got a few comments saying they wanted a part two which I definitely wasn’t planning on doing but in one of my insomnia episodes I came up with the plot for part two! Be warned it’s super angsty which is a rarity coming from me. 

*NOT MY GIF*

Word Count: 1487

If you like my stories you can check out my sideblog @jadegreywriting​ to see all of them and my masterlist without filtering through my main blog.

Soundtrack Inspiration: 

-Cruel World: Active Child 

-Cold: Aqualung, Lucy Schwartz

- I wish I knew: Shron Van Etten

I own all rights to this story and do not give permission for my stories to be published, translated or reposted anywhere else. The only places I have published my stories is here on Tumblr and on my AO3 account (LadyAuthor711)

Everything around you was dark. Dark and suffocating. You felt like you were coated in that darkness as it laid heavily over every inch of your skin, over your mouth suffocating you, and your eyes as it blinded you further. You felt the fear get the best of you as you started to claw your way out of the darkness, you felt it as it clung under your fingernails. You tried to blink it away as it got in your eyes but there was no use, you let your panic guide you through the cloying darkness as you finally broke free and saw the face of your own personal heaven; Eric.

You felt your chest relax a bit at the site of his smooth face, his blue eyes wide with worry. Maybe this truly was heaven and even here in this heavenly place, they let you have your monster.

He held his hand out for you to take, a small smile starting to form on his face at the sight of you.

“Eric.” You whispered, hearing just how rough your voice sounded to your own ears and reached your hand out to take his. But when you did you were startled at how solid it felt under your hand. With your hand still in his you turned his hand around examining it, his touch felt so real like he was actually here. Then you felt it.

Hunger.

A deep chest aching hunger rushed through you, you shook your head in confusion and watched as the small smile on Eric’s face faded as he watched you put the pieces together.

“Y/N.”  He whispered softly, like you were a frightened animal he was trying to coax from falling over a ledge.

You let go of Eric’s hand and turned your head to look back at what he had just pulled you out of. A hole.

“No.” You whispered. Looking at the massive hole where you just clawed your way out of and then back to Eric. And you finally saw the dirt he was covered in.

“Y/N. I can explain but first you have to eat.” He said in a firm but still soft voice and pulled a blood bag from behind his back.

“Oh God, Eric.” You whispered, feeling tears coming to your eyes. And the memory of your final moments came back to you. The feel of the bullet tearing through your chest, your heart slowing, and Eric’s voice roaring as you faded into that sweet darkness.

You looked down at yourself and saw the blood that coated your shirt right where your heart was. You felt that panic washing over you again in waves as you frantically tried to find the bullet hole. You teared open your shirt and clawed at your chest trying to find it, hoping that this was some sort of sick joke.

Eric reached his hands out to stop you. But you slapped him away. “Y/N. Let me explain, please.”

“You didn’t Eric!” You shouted, feeling the tears stream down your face as all the pieces came together.

Shame crossed Eric’s face.

“Please Eric, tell me you didn’t. That you didn’t do this to me!” You screamed, rubbing the tears from your eyes but stopped cold as you looked at your fingers. They were covered in blood. You truly were vampire now, blood tears and all.

“Y/N.” He said, reaching for you again and this time not letting you stop him as he enveloped you in his strong arms. But you couldn’t stop looking at your fingers.

“Oh my God.”

“You couldn’t understand why I did it.” he said softly against your dirt covered hair. “One minute you were by my side and then the next you were jumping in front of me, taking a bullet in the heart. Pam told me you were too far gone, but-”

You cut him off, pushing at his chest and surprising yourself when you were able to push him away. “You were selfish.”

Eric looked pained at that. “I couldn’t just let you die Y/N! You had so much life left to live and… and I just couldn’t bear the thought of it being ripped away from you.” “And you call this living? Feeding off of people and living in darkness?” You watched as Eric ground his teeth. “I died saving you!” You shoved at his chest again and felt a small amount of satisfaction at watching him stumble. “I took a bullet for you and this is what you do!” You shouted and shoved at Eric again and he let you. He let you get all of your anger out as you continued shoving and punching his chest.

“I died a hero’s death and then you turn me into a fucking monster!” You screamed, giving Eric one last punch hard enough to knock him to the ground. You felt your shoulders sag and then you fell to your knees, letting your blood tears fall to the ground. You felt like all your energy had been sapped out of you, you knew it was the hunger but you dreaded knowing that you’d have to feed.

Eric was already back on his feet and standing in front of you. “I know I was selfish. But, there is no life for me without you, Y/N. There never will be and even if it takes years for you to forgive me I will be right there until you do.”

“What if I never forgive you?” You asked your voice calm and even as you looked up at his pained face.

“Then that’s your choice. I’ve taken enough of your choices.”

Both of you were silent as you stewed over your choices.

“Before you decide to hate me forever can you please just eat. You maybe vampire now but you’ve had nothing to eat and you're weak.”

You shook your head. “I don’t want that.”

“Y/N.” he said in a firm voice.

“Fuck Eric! Lay off! I’m covered in blood and dirt and I’m going to retch at the idea of drinking that right now. I just want to wash everything off of me. Okay?”

Eric just nodded and held out his hand again for you to take.

**** You sighed softly at the feel of the shower washing off all the dirt and blood that was still on you from last night. You watched as the blood swirled down the drain, the last remnants of your human life being washed from you.

You turned the shower up, feeling that your skin was still cold but you still didn’t feel the warmth of the shower seep through your skin. So, you turned it up hotter and hotter. But still you felt nothing as you stood there under the scalding water but you were still cold on the inside.

You don’t know how long you had been standing here in that shower, but without realizing it you saw Eric’s hand reach past the shower curtain and turn down the water before he stepped inside himself. He was naked but there was nothing sexual between you as he climbed into the shower and grabbed the shampoo and started washing the dirt from your hair.

He was gentle as he covered your eyes and washed the soap from your hair then grabbed the conditioner and began to repeat the process. All the while he whispered to himself in another language but you couldn’t be bothered to find out what he was saying.

There was a time when you dreamt about your life with Eric and how it didn’t matter how happy you were with each other there would always be a time when you’d have to say goodbye to one another. Whether it was a few years down the line or in death. But, now there would be no goodbye unless you decided to leave him and you were pretty sure that even if it would kill him he would let you go this time. Like he said, he had taken enough of your choices.

You were tired of being angry, tired of thinking about what your life would be like now. You knew why he did it, and honestly you couldn’t say that you wouldn’t do the same for him, you did take a bullet for him. You just wanted to enjoy the feel of Eric’s hands on you again, wanted to enjoy the fact that you could hold him again.

So, you turned in his arms and wrapped your arms around his waist holding him tight. You heard his small sigh as he wrapped his hands around your head and held you as he stroked your wet hair.

You both had a lot to discuss for the future and maybe that future didn’t include Eric but right now you wanted to enjoy the first spark of warmth in your chest you felt all night.

[oasis-hunter]

This one took me a bit! I’m not the most well versed in regards to Azul or Riddle, but I tried my best to properly represent how I think they would handle the situation (the same can be said for Rook, but I’m a bit more familiar with him).

These ended up being a bit more like scenarios with bullet points, but hopefully they will suffice!

Edit 7/28: Had to repost cuz tumblr didn’t want it in the tags..

-- Mod Spitz

▷  Yandere Azul, Rook, and Riddle w/ a Darling that avoids them out of fear

▷ Content Warning: Obsessive behavior, Stalking, Intentions of Abuse(?)

------

▷▷ Azul Ashengrotto

Azul was not initially interested in Darling. In fact they were rather uninteresting to him. No magic, no exceptional skills, no athletic prowess. Certainly not the type of person who would cross his mind more than once. Yet somehow they managed to slowly draw him in.

Maybe it was the way they looked at him with such disdain upon their first encounter. They saw him as nothing more than a spineless con man, getting by in life through cheap tricks.

It certainly made the taste of victory that much sweeter as he watched the realization of their hopelessness spread further across their face with each failed attempt at besting him.

And it made him all the more ravenous in his desire to see more. He wanted to toy with them. Have them rely on him for a feeling of confidence and security only to have it torn down once more. Break their spirits over and over.

However, his toy gave him little thought following his overblotting. Why would they want to return to the Mostro Lounge, especially to see him?

He needed to draw them in once more, but his busy schedule allowed little time for chase. Fortunately for him, Jade and Floyd were eager to assist.

It was rather obvious to Darling they were being watched. It was hard not to notice the two large eels in their peripheral, especially after they had so many unpleasant encounters with the two mere weeks prior.

It seemed with every minor inconvenience one of them slid to their side, inquiring in an eerily casual way only to lead to suggesting Azul’s assistance in the matter. Darling rejected them at every turn, but their persistence was unyielding.

Sometimes they would take further measures that forced Darling’s hand. Late into the night they would have to cautiously enter the lounge in order to retrieve Grim, who had been bribed into staying with the promise of complimentary snacks. Like clockwork, Azul would corner them.

Darling would fidget nervously, desperately trying to pull Grim out as quickly as possible. Azul attempted light conversation, his sultry voice sending a chill through their spine as he feigned surprise at their arrival.

Their responses would be short -- if they even responded at all. This was irritating, but it was nothing too concerning. A measure of respect for his power was needed to instill a reliance after all. Why would they come seeking aid if they didn’t think he could give them something significant in return?

As they hastily retreated, he let out a sigh, slightly disappointed but satisfied. While they had left him once more, the initial barrier of getting them to return again was overcome. Now the true pursuit could begin.

▷▷   Rook Hunt

Rook had never had the pleasure of being formally introduced to Darling, and for any other typical human, he would not have felt any reason to pursue them. However, after discovering the unique conditions of their arrival, how could he stay away?

A mysterious individual brought to the school with no recollection of themself or their origin. Perhaps they weren’t even from this world. How mystifying! How intriguing!

Rook longed to analyze them, but from afar there was nothing to be seen. They blended in with the crowds so easily, the cat-like monster perched on their shoulder being the only part that made them stand out.

If Rook were more naive -- more careless -- he would have dismissed them, but his hunter’s blood boiled hot in his veins. He knew there was something more. Something deeper.

Had Darling been his prey, he would simply capture them and inspect them thoroughly by hand, inside and out. Truly the temptation burned in the back of his mind as he took every free opportunity to shadow them from afar.

Yes, he had become rather obsessed. More so than with any other creature he had pursued, but how could he not? Never before had someone like this existed, and that in itself was the truest embodiment of beauty.

It was not Darling who first realized they were being followed. It was Jack subtly warning them of the continued pursuit that had made them fully aware of the piercing eyes that had tracked them from every angle.

They had heard of Rook in fleeting conversations, and each victim of his interest had the same horror story to tell. From what they could gather, his observations were harmless, but the chill of anxiety they felt under his eyes told them a different tale.

They threw a glance over their shoulder, feeling his ever present gaze immediately falling upon them as they left the classroom. Their eyes locked for the first time, and a wide smile stretched across his face, Rook disappearing into the mass of students filing into the hallway. With the warmth sapped from their body, Darling realized at that moment they were most definitely not safe. But what fun was the chase if there was no fear mixed in?

▷▷   Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle was no stranger to being dodged. Aside from a handful of friends, his presence was often met with fear. Students fled at the possibility of losing their head for any misstep. While he had improved, he still needed to maintain some semblance of order lest his dorm fall into chaos.

Darling was no exception. As he entered the dorm’s common area, he saw them, sitting with Ace and Deuce, chatting away merrily. With one glance he could note every flaw in their posture, their tone, their grammar...Everything was in need of adjustment, and it festered inside of him like a desperate itch he couldn’t scratch.

It was Ace’s face slightly faltering that caused them to look his way. Seeing their eyes widen with worry and their smile wither away was always painful. They had such a lovely smile. Riddle couldn’t help but frown bitterly, which surely didn’t help him appear any more welcoming.

He resented how unpleasant he had become to them. His first impression wasn’t ideal, and it seemed even in his improved state there was tension.

Riddle simply wanted to help them. Oh, how he longed to help them. Fix them and turn them into the perfect being. One that followed every rule with flawless execution and could serve as the partner to his queenship. He had imagined it everyday, and with each averted glance and snuffed bout of laughter, he felt his heart chip away.

By instinct the words fell from his mouth. “Sit properly!” “The study period is for studying, NOT socializing!” “Properly enunciate! How do you expect me to hear you if you’re mumbling!” He felt so cruel, but the desire to correct was overwhelming. Increasingly so with them.

He could not overcome the irritation that gnawed at him incessantly as he witnessed what he believed could be the perfect companion conduct themself so poorly, and with each criticism, he could feel them further slipping from his grasp.

Riddle had to realize that if he truly wished to have his Darling, he would need to find a gentler means of easing them into his world. Only when they trusted him -- felt safe around him -- could he begin to mold them into his ideal. It just took a pinch more patience.

[tsrookie]

Alright, so today’s the three-year anniversary of Reputation a.k.a the greatest album of all time, my baby, the light of my life, the album that deserved a Grammy (trying desperately not to think about the scene from Miss Americana😭), the album that introduced us to the most beautiful couple ever, the album that shut Kimye up, and I better stop now, or else I’m not gonna shut up.

So in honour of this momentous occasion (and the fact that I reached 200+ followers! Thank you so much you guys!🥺 Love you all 3000💙), here’s a loooooong post on why Reputation is the Ethan and MC album.

1. ...Ready For It?

No one has to know

Throwback to MC saying the exact same words back in Miami.

In the middle of the night, in my dreams

You should see the things we do, baby, mmm

In the middle of the night, in my dreams

I know I'm gonna be with you

So I take my time

Remember back when MC asked for Ethan to get into bed right away during their first time? Ethan told them that he had dreamt about the moment for months, so he wasn’t going to rush it.

2. End Game

Big reputation, big reputation

Ooh you and me would be a big conversation

These two dating would be the talk of the hospital, and they know it.

Even when we'd argue, we don't do it for long

And you understand the good and bad, end up in the song

For all your beautiful traits, and the way you do it with ease

For all my flaws, paranoia, and insecurities

Think these lines are pretty self-explanatory😌

I hit you like bang

We tried to forget it, but we just couldn't

*gets war flashbacks of the ‘reset’ phase*😭 They tried to make it work, but we all know how Ch 8 of book 2 went😌

I swear I don't love the drama, it loves me

Perfect for our chaotic MC😌

3. Don’t Blame Me

Do I... really have to explain this one?

For you, I would cross the line

I would waste my time

I would lose my mind

They say she's gone too far this time

Do we need a recap of our rule-breaking MC?

And baby, for you, I would fall from grace

Just to touch your face

If you walk away

I'd beg you on my knees to stay

He was willing to risk his (mostly) rule-abiding reputation for being with MC. And there’s no way he wouldn’t beg for MC not to leave him if he ever screwed up🤷‍♀️

4. Delicate

This ain't for the best

My reputation's never been worse, so

You must like me for me

Ethan stood by MC’s side throughout the Ethics hearing, when her reputation was completely smeared, and people only saw her as a patient murderer. He didn’t know about the sabotages, but he would’ve definitely supported her if he had known.

We can't make

Any promises now, can we, babe?

Commitment-phobia🙃

Sometimes I wonder when you sleep

Are you ever dreaming of me?

Sometimes when I look into your eyes

I pretend you're mine, all the damn time

They spent so much of time apart, not able to be with each other, so the least they could do was dream of being with each other all the time.

5. So It Goes (an underrated af bop)

What can I say... it’s a sex song, okay? Don’t make me go into the details😂 Just listen to the lyrics, and all will be clear.

6. Gorgeous (Tumblr won’t let me put any more links)

MC’s eternal anthem to Ethan.

Whisky on ice, Sunset and Vine

You've ruined my life, by not being mine

We all know Ethan loves Whiskey, and the second line? C’mon!

You're so gorgeous

I can't say anything to your face

'Cause look at your face

And I'm so furious

At you for making me feel this way

But, what can I say?

You're gorgeous

Ethan Ramsey is famous for two reasons. One: his smart brain, I guess😒 Two: HIS LOOKS!!! HE’S GORGEOUS, AND DON’T DENY IT.

And you should think about the consequence

Of you touching my hand in the darkened room (dark room, dark room)

Ah, the olden days of hand holding in the diagnostics office🥺

Ocean blue eyes looking in mine

I feel like I might sink and drown and die

No explanation required.

You make me so happy, it turns back to sad, yeah

There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have

You are so gorgeous it makes me so mad

The wonderful will-they-won’t-they saga. The frustrating hot-and-cold behaviour. The ‘We can’t’, ‘It’s unethical’ and ‘It’s complicated’. MC deserves an award for her patience😓

7. King Of My Heart

I'm perfectly fine, I live on my own

I made up on my mind, I'm better off bein' alone

Ethan ‘I don’t believe in soulmates and nobody’s waiting at home’ Ramsey.

And all at once, you are the one I have been waiting for

King of my heart, body and soul, ooh whoa

And all at once, you are all I want, I'll never let you go

King of my heart, body and soul, ooh whoa

This could be from both Ethan and MC’s perspectives. The love they share isn’t something that you get easily. It’s something that MC has waited for her whole life, and something Ethan never knew he needed, but now can’t live without🥺

Late in the night, the city's asleep

Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep

Change my priorities

The taste of your lips is my idea of luxury

This was definitely Ethan throughout book 2, after he finally gave in. He let go of his previous rules and regulations, especially during the time of the attack. He was clearly affected, and once MC was alright, his main priority was her, and her alone.

Is the end of all the endings?

My broken bones are mending

With all these nights we're spending

Ethan’s been burnt a lot in the past. But all those wounds are now healing thanks to MC.

Up on the roof with a school girl crush

Drinking beer out of plastic cups

They act like lovesick teenagers around each other, like, that’s literally their description if you choose to kiss Ethan for the first time in Chapter 14 of book 2!😅

Say you fancy me, not fancy stuff

Baby, all at once, this is enough

We all know about his initial fear of his mother reaching out to him for the sake of his money. To him, MC not talking advantage of him is a pretty big deal, even though it’s never mentioned. You just know, you know?🥺

8. Dancing With Our Hands Tied

My, my love had been frozen

Deep blue, but you painted me golden

Again, Ethan doesn’t have the best experience with love. But MC changed that.

I'm a mess, but I'm the mess that you wanted

This could go both ways, cause they’re both piping hot messes😬 (but love each other anyway🥺)

The rest of this song could have made so much more sense for them if we had gotten some sort of a secret relationship storyline. But oh well, I’m definitely not complaining about the gala😌 (and definitely not believing any of the supposed cancelled storylines)

9. Dress

Our secret moments

In a crowded room

They got no idea

About me and you

I mean... pretty obvious😌

Even in my worst times, you could see the best of me

And I woke up just in time

Now I wake up by your side

My one and only, my lifeline

This is practically Ethan’s train of thought, and you can’t convince me otherwise.

As for the rest of the steamier lyrics... I’ll um... let you guys listen to it yourselves😁

10. Call It What You Want

I wrote an entire fic inspired by this song, so excuse me for the shameless self-promo, but go give it a read?🥺👉👈(totally fine if you don’t! I’ve probably made so many posts about this song that y’all know the meaning anyway😅)

11. New Years Day

Don't read the last page

But I stay when you're lost and I'm scared and you're turning away

I want your midnights

But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day

MC has always stayed by Ethan’s side, even when he’s pushed her away. These lines perfectly explain how she wants his worst times, and his best, the midnights they spend staying up together, and the moments where it’s just the two of them, when everyone else has left, like the aftermath of a New Years party (still mad at the fact that we didn’t get to see the gang celebrate New Year together😭)

I'll be there if you're the toast of the town babe

Or if you strike out and you're crawling home

The above explanation for these lines as well.

Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere

Becoming strangers to each other would be their worst nightmares. Knowing that the other was out there in the world somewhere, but not being in their lives would kill them.

You and me forevermore

These two are each other’s soulmate, they know it, even if they haven’t said it yet. Forever wouldn’t be enough for them to shower each other with they love they hold for each other. But it’s a good start.

——————————

If you guys made it this far, then I honestly love you more than words can ever express🥺💙 Thanks for putting up with my Swiftie-Directioner-Ethan stan ass, cause I dunno if I’d ever be able to handle someone like myself. And if you read all the above stuff, then I hope you wanna know why this album means so much to me.

Reputation is perceived as a dark album, when in reality it’s truly about finding love amongst all the noise. This album, and Taylor and Joe’s story, taught me what true love actually is, and Ethan and MC cemented that. This album and these two couples (quite literally) saved my life.

The most beautiful part about both these relationships is that even though they never showed it openly, for the sake of their relationships, both Ethan(in the story) and Joe stood by the side of the one’s they loved, despite half of the people who they knew hating on them, or betraying them. And I think that’s what’s truly important. Forming a true relationship like that, be it platonic or romantic, is long lasting, and I hope everyone finds those kind of people to fill their hearts with. Sending much love, and sorry for being a huge sap😅💙

Tagging a couple of my Swiftie homies: @swiftlydarcy @nikki-2406 @dxnicaramsey @kaavyaethanramsey @caseyvalentineramsey @drariellevalentine @justanotherrookie

[bellamyblakru]

this was requested by a friend on tumblr!! they sent me a very detailed prompt and asked if i would be willing to write a full-fledged fic for it (i was willing LOL). the main premise is all credit to them, and i appreciate them being so chill with my little additions and writing style.

it was an honor to write this for you, thank you so much for asking :') i hope you like it!!

here it is on ao3 and under the cut!! :) enjoy!! (hopefully lmfao)

Merlin didn’t want to go hunting—no surprise there. He had a bad feeling about this trip, but when he told Arthur about it, he just got a scoff in return and a “Sure, Merlin. We’re leaving at dawn.”

So, that brings Merlin, who was freezing in the bright winter morning, huddled near their horses, Honey and Llamrei, shivering from head to toe waiting for King Prat to come down. He would use magic to warm himself up a bit, and he would if he was going alone, but it would be too suspicious if Arthur was also going to freeze his arse off.

He was told to pack for a three day trip as Arthur wanted to get away from the castle for as long as was allowed. Merlin understood the need to escape—truly, he did, but he would be more sympathetic if it wasn't in the dead of winter. Merlin sighed at the thought, wanting this to be over with.

Arthur came galloping down the stairs of the castle, already giddy at the prospect of leaving the cage behind. Merlin couldn’t stop the smile forming at Arthur’s excitement. I guess I can suck it up, Merlin thought defeatedly, for Arthur.

Everything is always for Arthur—and Merlin wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Perk up, Merlin! This will be good, I know it,” Arthur beamed at him, taking Llamrei from him.

“Of course, sire, I can’t wait to kill frozen little innocent animals,” Merlin said sweetly under his breath.

Arthur rolled his eyes but didn’t respond, hopping on his horse, looking up at Leon, who was on the top step smiling at them and waving.

“I trust you will take good care of my kingdom, Sir Leon,” Arthur smiled at the man who bowed deeply.

“Of course, Sire,” and then Leon looked at Merlin, “Take care of our King, Merlin. Though, you never disappoint.”

Merlin heard Arthur mutter under his breath, “never disappoint, pff,” but Merlin gave Leon a true smile, “Of course, Sir Leon! I know you’ll do great here.”

Leon nodded at him, a small smile on his face at the praise, and went back into the warm castle.

Merlin heard Arthur go towards the gate, and with one last long suffering look at the warm castle begging him to stay, he went off after his King.

~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours in and Arthur was still radiating excitement. Being away from Camelot always scared him a little, but it was necessary. Sometimes it felt too much like a dungeon with no room to breathe. But here, in the brisk, winter air, it felt like he was flying.

He did feel a little bad about dragging Merlin in the cold, but he knew if he told Merlin to stay home, then he would have just followed anyway. Said man was prattling on about what patients he helped Gaius with this week, and Arthur smiled. He wouldn’t say it out loud, but having Merlin with him was always exciting.

Merlin never made anything dull. Arthur didn’t want to bring the roundtable on this trip, wanting to go back to the good old days—adventuring with his best friend at his side.

Arthur wanted to go to a specific clearing a few more hours away, but the journey was also part of the fun. Merlin was currently joking about what Gwaine did at training yesterday, but then they hit the river that Arthur had forgotten about.

They both stopped short, staring at the frozen water.

“Oh, yeah, I might have forgotten about this,” Arthur stated as innocently as he could, I’ll cross first without my horse to see if it’s stable enough.”

But as he got off his horse, Merlin beat him to it. Of course Merlin felt the need to go first, Arthur sighed internally, thinking about how Merlin always shows little to no self-preservation.

He gaped at the man, who just stepped on the ice.

Merlin turned around and smiled at Arthur, “See, everything will be okay. I’ll make sure it’s safe enough for us, just wait there.”

Arthur reluctantly nodded, “Be careful, Merlin.”

Merlin gave a small laugh, facing the other side that looked to be about twenty feet away, “Woah, Arthur. That almost sounded like you care for me, sire.”

Arthur tried to smile at the attempt at humor but it fell short—especially when he could hear the ice cracking a little.

Merlin makes it about halfway when he turns around to face him, “See! I knew it was strong enough, sire, you should trust me more.”

Arthur let out a rough laugh, “Yeah...yeah, you’re right Merlin. Hurry up, I want to get there soon.”

He meant it to sound annoyed, but it definitely came across more nervous, scared that their good luck wouldn’t last.

He was right.

Three more steps forwards, and Merlin fell through the ice—tumbling fast into the cold, unforgiving water without a sound.

He stared numbly where Merlin just plummeted. Time felt like it slowed, everything freezing in its tracks.

No, no, no, no. No.

Violently, time began once more when he saw Merlin’s head bob out of the water.

“MERLIN?!” Arthur took a fast step forwards, shaking with his palpable fear. He saw Merlin flick a terrified glance his way when Merlin’s frozen, wet arms started flailing on the broken ice around him—the panic obvious in his movements. Even from here, Arthur could see how shakey Merlin’s arms were, how little of his strength remained after it was sapped out of him when he fell.

Slowly now, terrified that Merlin would hurt himself more, Arthur started advancing onto the ice—carefully placing his feet to balance out the cracking. Merlin, still flailing in his panic, was almost blue, his body slowly draining of any color. He tried to heave himself up once more, but failed again when holding himself used too much energy that he didn’t have.

“Merlin, stop, look at me,” Merlin reluctantly listened, holding onto a piece of floating ice to stay stable, “You have to stop doing that. You’re wasting too much energy, I’m coming. Don’t worry, I’m coming.”

As he said that, he didn’t, wouldn’t, break eye contact with Merlin. Arthur steadied himself, trying to emit the strength and stability Merlin needed.

“Ar-Ar-tur, d-don’t,” Merlin stammered out, face draining even more.

Arthur faked a scoff, “You forget I’m the king, right? You can’t order me.”

Stepping slowly, Arthur reached the edge of the broken ice.

“Merlin, swim to me. We’re almost there, we’re going to be fine, and you’ll be cleaning my room in no time.”

Merlin obeyed and swam sluggishly towards his king. Arthur mumbled small praises the whole time, “That’s it, Merlin. You’re almost there.”

Arthur uncliped his cloak and bent down at the edge of the water. When Merlin reached him, Arthur didn’t hesitate. He grabbed Merlin from under his arms and heaved him out onto the unstable ice around them—crackling at the weight.

Arthur breathed a stream of curses, picking Merlin off the ground, covering him with his cloak, and ran to the horses. Once he reached Llamrei, he dropped to his knees, rolling Merlin towards him.

“Merlin?! Merlin. Come on, wake up,” he hit Merlin’s blue face slightly. They were both shaking so hard that Arthur couldn’t tell if Merlin was breathing or not. Raising a shivering hand, he touched Merlin’s throat, looking for a pulse.

He felt nothing.

“No,” Arthur shook his head vehemently, “No, you’re not dead. I don’t allow it. No, no, no, no.”

Arthur didn’t feel his tears through his frozen exterior as he started banging on Merlin’s chest.

“Please, please,” Arthur rambled, “please save him, please.” He repeated it, again and again, his tears blurring his eyes, “I’ll do anything, please, no, no.”

Arthur wouldn’t stop trying, and when he lifted up his fist again, a soft golden gold violently encompassed both of them.

Arthur stopped, and looked at the light in shock. It felt peaceful, safe, and warm. It was so warm.

He looked everywhere around them before landing on Merlin himself—a gasp escaping him.

Merlin was radiating the light. Did someone answer my prayers? Arthur wondered in pure awe, putting his fingers back to Merlin’s pulse when his shaking subsided enough.

He sobbed out in relief—it was there, weak but fast. He gathered Merlin in his arms, not fearing the power surrounding his servant, and put Merlin on Llamrei before he followed behind him. Grabbing Honey’s reins, he searched for a cave. They needed to recover, and Merlin needed time to heal.

And Arthur needed time to figure out what just happened.

It was still snowing, and Arthur growled at the sky because of it. Merlin was still unconscious laying against him, no longing glowing, and Arthur wished he would wake up—at least once. He should’ve stopped Merlin from going to sleep, he knew sleeping was never a good sign...we need Gaius, his brain added unhelpfully. First, they need shelter. Camelot was too far a journey with Merlin in this condition.

That strange light saved his life for now, but Merlin was still shivering and blue. Arthur couldn’t stop replaying that scene in his head: Merlin tumbling into the frozen waters without a sound, time stopping and beginning, and that light that saved their lives—Merlin’s light. He was terrified when he realized that Merlin might not make the night. But that wouldn’t happen...he wouldn’t let it happen. Never—not on his watch.

After what felt like hours, he found a cave large enough for the four of them, and he raced towards it.

Quickly, he built a fire inside—rather difficult when everything is soaked, but he managed to find some dry wood—placing Merlin directly next to it, then he made sure the horses were comfortable enough for the long night before he returned to Merlin.

The man in question was still soaking wet, and Arthur frowned at Merlin’s shaking. Deciding that he would be warm enough quickly by the fire, he took off Merlin’s shirt and the cloak wrapped around him, placing them on the other side of the fire to dry, and gave Merlin his own shirt—the quality much better than the strings holding together Merlin’s shirt.

I’ll buy him better clothes, Arthur thought grimly, he should have warmer clothes. He mentally kicked himself for forgetting how little Merlin spends on himself, and he stared at the shivering man, who was turning less blue every second.

The light replayed in his head, and without the adrenaline and panic flooding his system, he truly thought about it. And it stopped him dead.

Magic. That was obviously magic. He couldn’t help but back away from Merlin, years of lessons at the forefront of his mind. No, Merlin couldn’t have magic. Magic was evil, wasn’t it?

He wasn’t so sure, especially not now. What he felt, it wasn’t cruel, or menacing, or dangerous. It was pure, warm, and light—similar to the light that led him out the cave all those years ago. It felt like a hug from someone you love dearly. This went against everything his father taught him, but then again, don’t I already think magic isn’t wholly evil? He pondered that thought with a small frown.

Before the purge, magic was used to heal—Gaius being the prime example—and used to grow crops and help others. But, it was also used to aid in people’s greed, for fighting, for gaining the upper hand...but didn’t swords do that, too? A tool to be used by those who knew how to wield it, and in the wrong hands, it leads to destruction—no different than someone who masters a sword with expert skill and ability.

That Dragonlord was magic as well, Arthur thought back to that adventure focusing on how distraught Merlin was when the man died. Maybe they had a connection through their magic? But that brought the thoughts back to the man in front of him. How long has he practiced magic right under Arthur’s nose? For what purpose?

Merlin isn’t evil, but why lie to me? And that’s what hurts the most. The lying. Arthur thought they told each other everything. Merlin was his brother in everything except blood—they were stronger together, always. Arthur knew Merlin kept secrets, especially by the way Merlin’s moods would drastically shift one day to the next. Arthur knew that Merlin was hiding something, but why did it feel so bad?

Thinking back on their adventures, Arthur could clearly see now that Merlin had magic. The branch that would accidentally hit the bandit behind Arthur’s back when he wasn’t looking, the creatures that can only be killed by magic dying unexpectedly, the way Arthur sometimes healed faster than he thought was possible. All things that aided Arthur.

His mind suddenly flashed the scene in his head of him almost killing his father after finding out what his father did to his mother, and to magic users, and Arthur paused this time on Merlin. Merlin didn’t deny the vision of his mother during the long journey back...he almost seemed saddened by the whole thing, taking it to heart. But the minute Arthur was going to kill Uther, Merlin was the one to stop him. Merlin, who has magic, stopped Arthur from killing the man who spent his reign committing a genocide of a whole group of people—Merlin’s people.

He did it for Arthur, he had to—just like everything else Merlin did and continues to do. That confused Arthur even more, if he was being honest. Why protect the son of the King who murdered innocent people for a decade? What does Merlin get from that?

As if Merlin could feel Arthur’s inner turmoil, he groaned and tried to open his eyes. Blearily, he managed to open them and he stared at Arthur, a confused look adorning his features. He tried to sit up, but failed miserably, groaning from the exertion.

Arthur rushed to him, placing his hand on Merlin’s, helping him sit up more, “Stop moving, you dollophead.”

Merlin didn’t retort back, making Arthur frown again, and asked, his voice gruff with pain, “Ar-Arthur. What happened?”

Arthur leaned slightly away from Merlin, sitting on his heels facing the fire still burning brightly, “You fell in the water, and I got you out.”

“Thank you, Arthur,” Merlin breathed, eyes filled with nothing but gratitude, but then, at the thick silence, he narrowed his eyes at the king, “That’s not all, is it?”

Arthur, still watching the flames, answered quietly, “No.”

Merlin’s breathing went into short, fast puffs, and he eyed Arthur’s sword at his side, moving back from Arthur as nonchalantly as he could, “No?”

Arthur missed nothing. He saw the panic, the pure, unadulterated fear flooding through Merlin—almost a tangible thing in the air. Arthur sucked in a quick breath when he realized that Merlin thought Arthur would kill him. Arthur threw his sword to the other side of the cave, and put his hands towards Merlin like a wild animal being tamed.

“Merlin. Merlin, look at me,” Merlin, whose tears were already falling, did so slowly, “I would never hurt you. I promise.”

He heard Merlin’s breathing hitch, but he continued, “I don’t know why or how, but you saved us from dying out there. When I brought you back to land, we were both shivering so bad that I couldn’t even check your pulse. We were going to die, but we didn’t. You...you emitted this golden glow, and it felt like you. So you, Merlin. It felt familiar, warm, and safe. I’ve never felt safer.”

Merlin’s eyes never left Arthur’s, and Merlin sobbed once more, and stuttered out, “Arthur, I’m so, so sorry.”

Arthur started shaking his head, but Merlin plowed on, “I was born like this. I was able to do m-magic longer than I knew how to walk. I-I wanted to tell you for so long, but I didn’t know h-how you would react. For a while I thought you would kill me, but then I thought y-you would send me away. But I need to protect you, to save you, to serve you. It was the reason I was put onto the Earth. My magic is yours, Arthur, only yours—as it always has been.”

Arthur was speechless, staring at Merlin like he was a puzzle that was just solved.

“I believe you,” Arthur said softly, moved beyond comprehension. They had a connection, Arthur already knew this, but to this degree? To this loyalty? Arthur smiled at Merlin, “I don’t know why you place such loyalty in me, but, thank you Merlin. For protecting me.”

Merlin gave Arthur a small nod, still crying softly. Arthur saw Merlin look down, with his face going red in embarrassment at what he saw.

“Arthur, you shouldn’t have,” Merlin said gently, pulling on Arthur’s shirt, “I’m supposed to be saving your sorry arse, not the other way around.”

Arthur scoffed, “Right. I should’ve let you, what? Drown and shiver to death...no thank you, I am a King for a reason, Merlin. I am supposed to help the helpless.”

Merlin’s face went beet red again, apparently not used to being saved. Arthur would help fix that, before Merlin ended up killing himself by his self sacrificing ways.

Arthur retrieved some food that was packed in their bags and came back to Merlin, who refused at first at being served, but then he obliged after Arthur didn’t move.

“You know, Merlin,” Arthur started, still feeding them both, “getting help every once and awhile is a good thing. It’s okay to ask for help when you need it. No one should go through life alone—especially when there are people willing to be there for you.”

Merlin, still shaking from the fall, looked up at Arthur, “Yeah?”

Arthur sat back, next to Merlin, again looking at the fire, “Yeah. You scared me pretty badly out there Merlin. I thought I lost you.”

Merlin slouched inwards, upset at himself as well, but didn’t respond. Arthur knew that Merlin knew that he (Merlin) had reckless tendencies, that he threw himself at danger all the time without any self preservation—they’ve talked about it before, actually.

Instead of addressing his continued self-sacrificing actions, he squared his shoulders and looked at Arthur, “Thank you again, Arthur. You saved my life today, and I will never forget it. It was also dangerous for you to go on the ice to get me, but you did it anyways. So, thank you, and,” he added softly, “thank you for not hating me.”

Arthur smiled at him and gave him a small nod, “Well, someone had to save your sorry arse from dying, and Honey wasn’t about to jump in the river to save you...and,” he paused slightly, tilting his head, “I don’t think I could ever hate you.”

Merlin tried to smile but he coughed and moaned a bit in pain, and Arthur rushed back to his side.

“Are you okay? Do you need anything?” Arthur asks, nerves spiking through him.

Merlin just shook his head and gave Arthur a warm smile before quickly falling asleep again.

~~~~~~~~~~

Merlin woke up feeling better than he has in a long time. When his magic reacted to his fall, it healed him almost all the way. And throughout the night, his magic slowly knitted him back together.

He couldn’t believe Arthur knew about his magic and didn’t hate him for it, and he didn’t banish him, or kill him. Arthur even looked at him the same way, not fearing Merlin or thinking him weak in this state.

Merlin hated being helpless, but Arthur was right. It’s okay to get help when you need it, but Merlin needed to work on believing it more—especially since Arthur now knows about his magic, he should probably talk to the king now before secretly stopping someone evil, he mused.

Merlin smiled at the thought and looked down to see the King’s shirt still on him, with Arthur shirtless snuggling by the fire. Merlin quickly took it off, missing the nice tunic immediately, and spelled the shirt to be warm and fresh for Arthur once he woke up. Merlin slowly walked to the firepit, picked up his shirt that was now thankfully dry, and put it back on.

Arthur woke up with a groan, rubbing his eyes tiredly, but shot up when he saw Merlin cleaning up.

“What are you doing? How are you feeling? You should’ve kept my shirt, it would keep you warmer than yours.”

Merlin smiled at the rambling, and answered perkily, “I am cleaning up, I feel good, thanks to you, and it’s okay, sire. My shirt was nice and warm this morning.”

Arthur narrowed his eyes but nodded, and after a quick breakfast, they took care of the horses and rode off towards Camelot.

After a few minutes in comfortable silence, Merlin, with a curious look on his face, asked quietly in the slightly warming morning, “Everything is going to change now, won’t it?”

Arthur gave Merlin a true smile—a smile that had even destiny singing in the distance: “Yes, but I think it’s time for some change, don’t you think?”

[timextoxhajima]

YOU ARE LITERALLY SO FUN

without you i wouldn’t have been interacting with you and your other anons

AND OMG READ HOSTIS loml

and i swearr we would be such good friends if i didnt live like thousands of miles away from you

makes me regret not getting tumblr sooner bc twitter is like too soft for me

so glad to be part of the quintet

and even though i ahem with ahem, thanksss for forgiving me😇….now forgive him

you gave me advice on my hopeless romantics and extremely high standards, never truly shared with anyone before

and you constantly let me rant bout hostis ashjdjf

also, its absolutely ur fault, you spawned miraes and said “i’M iMmUnE tO hIm” well are you immune now?!?!?

and even though im renamed regina george…thats okay

and you wanna fedex me a slap? or hit me with a baguette? thats fine too

its all worth it to torment you till you become possessive over he who shall not be named

or you know do the opposite and then throw him away😒🙄

and i wish you would not gloss over hyunjae and just mention ju whenever i send something jujae🙄

thanks for letting me be a simp towards my boba baby

i hate being a sap and telling ppl they’re amazing cause its awkward,

so ily <3

FIRST OF FUCKING ALL I WROTE HOSTIS BASED OFF SOMEONE'S REQUEST OR LIKE A GENERAL SUGGESTION TO TRY WRITING AN E2L BECAUSE I DIDNT BUY THE TROPE AND SHE ASKED ME TO TRY I WASN'T PLANNING ON SPAWNING MIRAES AND THEN HAVE YALL DICKS UP MY ASSES EVEN AFTER A FUCKING YEAR AND THEN BULLYING ME INTO DITCHING JUBBY

SECOND OF ALL awwwwww you're so sweet <333333 i wish all my anons/friends on here weren't like a billion miles from me either uwu ive made so many friends idt i can go back to sch and think im popular anymore bec i think it's much cooler to have friends from other countries <3

THIRD OF ALL KINDLY leave THE DEMON ALONE since yall keep shoving him down my throat THEN ILL COLLECT HIM MYSELF stop trying to remove him from me TT

[marshmallowprotection]

You’ll be able to find all my MysticTober prompts here on Tumblr, or on AO3 daily @ lilacnightmares   !

Day 15: Galaxy

GALAXY

The sky was neverending and spoke to him like nothing else. When he felt like he was the only one in the universe, he would look up at the sky and let his worries cease. He wasn’t alone, nobody ever truly was because the sun was there, the stars were there, the planets were there, and there was an entire vast galaxy of things that existed out there!

You couldn’t feel lonely when you thought about how big the world was and how much bigger it could be.

Saeyoung was so happy when he thought about that.

Now, he wasn’t alone at all, not really. He had his brother back and not only that, he had gained an entire family over the past couple of years.

However, there were still moments where he found himself going outside to sit underneath the stars to reflect on his feelings and how happy he was. To think that a year ago, he had been alone, but now his house was bustling and he had more family than he could count on a single hand.

Did he deserve that, though?

After all, he had been the one to simply isolate himself in the first place from the rest of humanity and the stars had been his only company. Sighing, he laid back against the grass and searched for the familiar shapes and lines that built constellations.

Things had changed so much in a short amount of time and it was hard to believe. He was never no longer bound by the oppressive chains of the agency. Now, he could do whatever he wanted, and the opportunity handed to him was nothing that he took lightly. Sure there were limits to it but did that matter in the long run? This was more than he had ever had, more than Saeran had ever had, and he would do everything he could to ensure that this happiness existed forever.

As vast as the stars in this galaxy, so would their aspirations and hopes be.

“Are you going to stay out here all night in the cold?” He lifted his head back to see Lila staring at him from the doorway with a sweater wrapped over her shoulders. “Shouldn’t you be inside with those two at this hour?”

“I should,” Saeyoung said. He looked back up at the stars. “But, I couldn’t sleep. It’s that time of year where I get restless. I didn’t want to bother them. I can ask the same thing of you, princess. Why aren’t you with Saeran right now?”

Silence, then a sigh.

“Nightmares,” she admitted.

“...About that place?” he didn’t dare say the name. He knew that neither she nor Saeran wanted to be reminded of what happened at Mint Eye. They had suffered enough and he refused to hurt either one of them again.

“You could say that,” she said.

Lila took a stop nearby on the ground, another sigh leaving her mouth. She seemed to be plagued by the memories just as much as he was. Still, the good news to this suffering was that they didn’t have to deal with this alone. Nobody did. They had all each other, in this crazy mixed-up family that came together for no reason.

“I like to watch the stars,” he said. He could see where the lingering galaxy gave way to a blinding reflection of light from the moon. “You know, there may be millions of them, but they all illuminate the sky, showing us that we’re never alone… I’d like to think that we’re never alone, either, so if that may comfort you, I’m happy to share it.”

“...Has Saeran ever told you that you’re a sap?”

He chuckled, “A few times.”

[pernatius]

Lost in Space Part 9: Ch 1

Summary: Syco and the unnamed Space Explorer question their choices.

Lost in Space on Tumblr

Lost in Space on ao3

At the center, behind the looming figure, a single ray of moonlight shines on the spilled dark, nearly blood-red paint that came out of its sideways bowl. It looks as if the paint is glowing, illuminating this poorly lit and now stuffy room with a red tint, giving the room a sinister vibe. 

The figure before Syco has their right eye twitch. Pointy face gulps and bites their lip. One wide-eyed moment later and our captor bursts out laughing. The figures, the accomplices, circling us follow suit. To them, Syco is a comedian. To me, he’s a brick wall. Not a single funny bone in his body, yet they laugh as if he told the funniest joke ever. Saamuki blushes at this. 

From nervousness to amusement to returning to square one, attentive with a tad bit of annoyance, Pointy Face’s transitions are awkward. Maybe it’s because they’re no longer self-assured. No longer does pride escape their lips. Discomfort, instead, drifts from their hand gestures as they speak. “I’ll also admit how downright brilliant you’ve been throughout this war. Though, you can’t run forever. At some point, you need to stop. We must catch our breaths before we dare to think of that next step. You already know this before taking that first step. However, we don't know everything. We can't plan for things we don't know. It's impossible. We trip on that crack we didn’t see, and we scrape our knee. It hurts. Badly.” 

“We’ve known each other for years, Zeq, but merely knowing is different from friendship.” Pointy Face, or as Syco says is Zeq, raises an eyebrow. “Although, I wish I was wrong. I see I’m faced with more enemies rather than given allies.” That’s what’s been in those blue eyes of his. He’s regretful. 

“And that surprises you? I can no longer trade. Supplies are low. My village is dying. Again, my people suffer,” Zeq lowers their voice with the drop of Syco’s ears, “This isn’t personal, Syco. It’s diplomatic. It’s about survival. The sooner this war ends, the sooner I can save my people.” 

“How long until they get here?”

“Less than an hour.”

“Then, I have plenty of time to do this.” Out first comes a grunt, then out second comes Syco. The freed Tauvox has Zeq stumble backward and with their words. Those around us motion their hands in a way I’m familiar with. Transforming their fingers into blades, surprisingly sharp for leaves, they take a step forward. They’re halted from taking another when Syco encases Zeq’s neck with his thick fingers. Zeq’s hat falls. It rolls and goes in a little circular motion before stopping and pointing in my direction. 

It’s here I notice how tall Zeq is, almost as tall as Syco, but somehow looks several feet smaller than the actual height difference between the two. Zeq is lanky and wilting, so Syco’s hand easily wraps around it and can easily snap it. He’s imposing to them, but not to me. 

“You will let us all go, and in return, I’ll let your mayor go.”

“What are you doing? Let me go. Put me down. Don’t you see what I’m doing for you,” Zeq spoke up. 

“All you’re doing is delaying my plans.”

“No, Syco. I’m saving you from what’s to come as well. You’ve gone farther than your predecessor, yes, but you will fail just like him. Your, my people’s, and trillions of other’s suffering can end here.” 

That moment where our eyes met I thought he was going to do it. I thought he was going to end it all. To let Zeq go than to just squeeze Zeq’s throat until it ripped in half, cemented who Syco truly is. Time has truly lost its touch on him. It no longer means anything to him. He’ll take down those who are in his way. It also cemented their decision in attacking. A blade went through Syco’s chest. He elbowed them, causing the blade to slide out and the others now surrounding him to look at one another. Then, proceed. They slice into Syco’s skin, some of his furs break off from the cuts and scatter across their chests, and in turn, Syco stabs them with his horns. His horns go right through each of them, but all of them easily heal. I see veins stitch themselves back together and soon flesh as well. The same can’t be said about the lifeless, decapitated mayor. 

I try breaking free from my troubles, but all it does is tighten the sap around me. I see why the others haven’t succeeded as Syco has. I’m starting to sweat. Saamuki would’ve landed herself to be boiled alive. As for Shiitakee, well, he’s Shiitakee. 

The drooping mushroom says, “What I’d do to be lighting up a cigarette right now.” 

Three simple strokes of his horn between their swings and the three of us are freed. Syco catches one of their blades between his hands and throws them into the others before turning to us and shouting, “What are you waiting for? Get to the ship!”

Walking across the bridge made me anxious. Running and trying to balance while the bridge sways left to right because of the fight happening behind me still gives me anxiety, but now it's nauseating. At least now it's too dark to spot the ground between the wood making up this rickety path, but it’s too dark to make out what’s what. The bushy branches above let some, not enough, moonlight in. My crown’s fire isn’t enough either. I’d thank Saamuki for glowing on this hectic night if I wasn’t busy running and trying not to trip. 

Another obstacle stood in our way as Zeq’s aides don't know when to give up. They’re relentless. They don’t know when to fall. So, now we’re sandwiched between them and the scowled figure from earlier. I get out my blade, and Saamuki prepares to lunge, but it’s Shiittakee that challenges the figure who’s far larger than the three of us. Syco, if he wanted to, could crush Shiitakee just like he did with Zeq. This figure could crush Shiitakee and cause him to explode. I don’t want to see any more guts be sprayed out, so I take a step closer. I could hear Syco still deflecting, and his horns connecting with their blades as Shiitakee proves he’s more than just some whiny quitter. A yellowish gas sprays out of his cap, fuming all around us. The figure, Saamuki, and I cough. Its stench was sucked up by my nostrils and carried to my taste buds. I gag. It tasted like rotten eggs mixed with spoiled milk with a dash of a public toilet. When it finally escapes my senses, another bridge appears between us. The tree beneath us had magically, probably because of that rancid gas, had stretched one of its branches to the ground, puncturing through the ocean of darkness resting beneath our feet. What could’ve been our aggressor just watches as we escape to the makeshift bridge. We enter the darkness, and not a minute after, I hear Syco joining us. This bridge groans with his added weight as he continues to battle on with those several vengeful figures. 

Saamuki sends a blast their way. I hear someone slip. They plummet, but I don’t hear them land. So, definitely not Syco. Another blast, but it takes a moment longer before another one of them falls into the blackness below. There’s no third attempt. She turns back around, and I catch an ominous glimpse of the ones left watching us and the now caught up Syco walk the rest of the way. They watch us emotionlessly with their blades remaining.   

A wind glazed us once we set foot onto the ground. It's gentle, a feeling I haven’t felt in some time. 

Something new happens. Saamuki moves her hands in a circular shape. Little bolts of lightning shot out between her fingers. She breathed out and threw her hands apart. A small, glowing blue orb now floats above us, lighting everything around us within what I guess is a twenty-foot radius. Something scampers away, and Syco moves away from my awe, taking the lead. 

I walk by his side the rest of the way to the spaceship. I should feel equal to him now, but there’s still plenty of distance between us before that ever could happen. I feel like he noticed it too, or maybe I’m just thinking about it too much. It’s just strange that he asked me to join him in his meeting with General Knox, interrupting Saamuki and his second-in-command. Saamuki and I look at each other, as his second-in-command continues what he was saying before being cut off by his commander. The two of us know I can’t decline. General Knox has our friends wrapped around his thumb. The last I heard from Syco is that they were in Quadrant Forty. It’s been too long since then. Who knows which quadrant they’re in? After all, finding and having them regain control are the main reasons we’ve let ourselves be commanded by the sweaty Tauvox arguing with the non-sweaty Tauvox. Any information helps. Whatever is going to be said during the meeting definitely is.

I nod. He replies with, “Great. Follow me. The meeting is going to start soon.”

Again, I walk by his side. I steal a glance from Saamuki until she turns to look at the pondering Shiitakee. The second-in-command stalks off, cutting across the hallway and ending my glance at Saamuki. 

This room is new. Row by row across the walls, lights turn on. The room is large but not grand. Compared to the other rooms in the ship, even to the rented room shared between Saamuki and me, it’s small. On either side of the room sat two paintings. One of a man I know, Syco’s predecessor, and the other of a Tauvox with white fur. A scar stretches from their right eyebrow to the left side of their jawline. They’re just a picture, but I can sense they’re as much of a brute as The Commander, the terrifying presence instead of that corpse down below. 

“Only one other, besides us, has entered this room. You know of him quite well.” I follow the Tauvox to the center of the room. Resting there is a platform with etchings of alien writing. It’s similar to Sakhra’s quilt. Actually, I think it’s the same. It’s just upside down. 

I don’t have to look where he’s looking at it. Looking at that painting as long as I did was enough. So, I instead look at him. His expression is the same one he showed back in Zeq’s village. 

“Why did you ask me to join you?”

“Because I trust you.” Interrupting him is the platform before us blinking. “Stay out of his sight. Commander Knox does not know you’re here.” 

I move away as far as I can as the symbols on the platform float up and spin around Syco. Appearing in front of him is a hologram of that monkey-like commander. Would he and his people be considered cousins to humans? Human’s next evolution? Do they still count as humans? Besides the fur and metal parts, they still look human. I wonder what the Virmuses went through to look like that in the near millennia they split up from humanity. 

“Ah, Commander Knox you were able to make it today.”

“Quadrant Forty has been tedious, Commander Syco.”

“Oh?”

“This is not an admittance to the limitations of my intelligence.”

“I would hope not.”

“As of the last report, half an hour ago, we have taken control of half of the quadrant.”

“And what of the three?”

“Same as the last time. Nothing new. Although, they did help me in a tight squeeze this morning.” I imagine Syco to have raised an eyebrow because the other commander continued with, “Again, not me admitting my limitations.”

“Great. Casualties?”

A laugh. “None from my side, but hundreds from the enemy.”

A flinch. The very hand Syco used to kill Zeq flinched. It’s a subtle movement. Commander Knox doesn’t notice, but I do. From that seemingly small action, I now know why he asked me to be here.

[sketchguk]

Hi, friends! I can honestly say that I’ve been on Tumblr for about 9 years, but only 7 of those months have been spent on this account. Being a part of this fandom means so much to me, and as cheesy as it may be, I’ve never felt so much love from a community like this. I think that I should spread a little love back to everyone through this festive follow forever post in the spirit of the holidays (there’s also a message for my beautiful followers at the very end, so bear with me). Although I may have not spoken to you all personally, you’ve made my experience here amazing!! Whether it’s seeing you on my dash or in my inbox, you’ve all made me smile one way or another!! I’ll admit right now that I’ve sent so many anonymous messages to you all because I’m really shy, haha. Not to mention, I follow so many amazing content creators, gif/gfx makers and fic writers alike, and I want to make you smile as much as you have made me!! Y’all are so lovely, and I’m not totally sure why anyone chooses to interact with me or to follow me nonetheless. Maybe you’ve read a fic of mine, or none at all, I appreciate you all the same 💕 I know some of you may be in and out of hiatus, but just know that I’m thinking of you!! And if this is the first time you’re coming across my blog, I guess this is a good time to introduce myself. Hi, I’m Teresa. It’s nice to meet you 😄

If you’re reading this, hopefully we can chat a little more. I would love to get to know such lovely people 😊  To my beautiful mutuals, I love you all sooo much 💓 I’m not the best at expressing my feelings, but I hope that this is a start! @190713 @95swifi ✩ @alwayschoosechocolate ✩ @aureumjeon ✩ @beebopboobop ✩ @boobearcupcake ✩ @btsaremyfaves ✩ @btssmutheaven ✩ @bwiq ✩ @engeljimin ✩ @ddaengwrld ✩ @emiyooa ✩ @geniuslab 💌 ✩ @gimmeyoon (@gimmeyoon-main) ✩ @girlwiththespecs ✩ @gukgalore ✩ @gukkheaven ✩ @guktwt ✩ @hobimygs​ ✩ @hoseoknysus ✩ @idiotscalledfriends ✩ @joonary ✩ @kitsutaes (@geniusguk) 💌 ✩ @littlemisskookie ✩ @llsanjoonie ✩ @lovehrs ✩ @magicshop-myg ✩ @map-of-yoongi ✩ @maptoyoongi ✩ @mercurygguk ✩ @minflix ✩ @minlexia ✩ @minyoongsueit ✩ @mygsii ✩ @outroguks ✩ @pjmskosmos ✩ @sdmnluv ✩ @softaellie ✩ @spookitokki (@spookitokkimain) ✩ @starrytete 💌 ✩ @syugasshi ✩ @taesseok 💌 ✩ @tokyoscript ✩ @ve1vetyoongi ✩ @vminary 💌 ✩ @vtbts ✩ @vxngguk ✩ @wthkook ✩ @yourdelights 💌 If your url is bolded, scroll down for some words of affirmation. ✨ If you have an emoji (💌) next to your url, scroll down for a special message. 😇🌟  And here’s a shoutout to some of my favorite fic writers, because you all allow me escape to my happy place !! Thank you so much for contributing to the writing community !! This online space is pretty hectic, especially as of late, but you all make it worth it. Even if you’re taking a break from writing, I am here cheering you on !! And to let you know that I’ll support you no matter what. I hope you never lose your spark for passion and creativity !! Sometimes life gets the best of us, and other times, things are not in our control, but I want to send my love and appreciation to you nevertheless. Your fics have inspired me to try my own hand at writing, and I’m forever grateful ✨ You’re spectacular, every single one of you, so never forget that! Kpop isn’t that serious, but I’ll probably think about your fics until the day I die. @bymoonchild ✩ @floralseokjin ✩ @foreverpark ✩ @geniuslab ✩ @gimmeyoon ✩ @gukgalore ✩ @gukkheaven ✩ @guktwt ✩ @jamaisjoons ✩ @gukyi ✩ @kookswife ✩ @kinktae ✩ @kpopfanfictrash ✩ @minflix ✩ @mygsii ✩ @personasintro​ ✩ @prolixitae ✩ @readyplayerhobi ✩ @spookitokki ​ ✩ @ubemango ✩ @ve1vetyoongi (yee, you might see some repeats because my moots are super talented) 💖  A love letter from me to you: 💌 @geniuslab Megan !! This might sound soo sappy, but you’re the very first person I followed when I made this blog !! It’s because I’ve read all of your fics (perhaps more than once on my old account), and you inspired me to start writing as well. You have no idea how happy I was when you said you would get back into writing fics. I guess I’ll expose myself right now, but I’ve sent a few anons to you on the matter haha (yes, I am a 7 Chances enthusiast, one of many). You’re so talented, and I admire you so much 🥺 A gif maker and fic writer ?? Nothing you can’t do !! Among other things, you’re such a kind-hearted individual. I’ve read plenty of your text posts, and there’s just something so warm about the way you carry yourself. You deserve the world, and I wish for nothing but the best for you !! I hope you have an amazing new year and that you have space for peace, love, and healing. Please know that I support you through and through, and that you are well-loved ❣️

💌 @kitsutaes (@geniusguk) Yas !! I know we just started chatting, but I love getting to know you !! It’s hard for me to reach out to people because I’m shy, but I’m really grateful that you hit me up 😊 It’s been so nice getting to know you, and I hope we can get closer 💕 I’m already learning so much about you because our chats just flow from one topic to another !! You said you wanna visit new york one day, so I’ll hold you to that 😉 I’ll be your tour guide, and the only exchange I’ll ever need is your friendship !! Some dried mangoes would be nice too 😚 haha jk … unless 😳 I hope you have an amazing year filled with lots and lots of love. May you receive everything you’re wishing for !! 

💌 @starrytete Mirelle !! I’m still getting used to your new url LOL. But how could I ever forget you?? You are quite literally the human embodiment of an angel. You’re always spreading positivity, and I adore you with all my heart. I wish that I could be as radiant as you !! All the emojis that I’m using in this post?? An homage to you 🌼☀️ I don’t think I can ever look at emojis the same way thanks to you haha. Sending you lots of love!! I hope we can speak more in the future!! May the new year bring you happiness and good fortune!! Please take care of yourself, ok?! Message me whenever because my inbox is always open 🥰 

💌 @taesseok Mia !! I just love seeing you on my dash. I’ll give you a quick run down: Teresa: :[ Mia: *posts* Teresa: :] It’s like the universe knows. You’re a light in this world, and I hope you never lose your spark !! May you smile as often as I do (all thanks to you) 💗 I wish for nothing but your happiness since you deserve it and more. In fact, it’s the world that doesn’t deserve you and your sparkle !! I hope this year was rewarding for you, but I already know that 2020 will be better and better. I’ll be sending you lots of positive energy for the new year hehe 💞 Hopefully we can talk more soon !! I’d love to be friends !!

💌 @vminary Kiara !! I’m so happy that you reached out to me all those months ago because you’ve become one of my closest online friends !! I can’t tell you how much you mean to me because the limit does not exist. It’s so easy to talk to you, and sometimes our conversations are big sis/lil sis -esque (I’ve always wanted a sister lol 🐣). I feel as if we’ve taught one another so much, especially because of our cultural differences and the tiny age gap that we share. I find myself missing you because of the time zones LOL. In the middle of the day, I’m wondering whether or not you’re sleeping well :’) Why do you have to live across the world?? 😔 I would totally send you a package if I wasn’t broke haha. I’m sending you all my love here though, and I hope that’s enough !! 💛

💌 @yourdelights Destinee !! You are SUCH a sweetheart. The messages that you send me are so kind, and I don’t know what I did to deserve you. Do let me know how you stumbled across my blog because I feel like you’re way too cool for me LOL. Your posts are always so hilarious, and the tags have me dying. Your sense of humor >> !! My love for you is immeasurable, and I hope you know that, ahh. I think it was truly solidified when I found out you’re a fan of day6 and the rose :’) I’m not really a multi-stan, but from that moment on, I was sold. That was the only time my instincts did not let me down 🌹💝 I swear I’m getting introduced to new fandoms because of you haha. And when you went on a lil hiatus, I really missed seeing you on my dash !! I hope that you’ll be with us for a long time though !! I really can’t wait for what’s in store for next year, because no pressure or anything, but I’m sincerely excited for your WIPs hehe. I’m rooting for ya, so make sure you make the new year your b*tch !!  Lastly, thank you so much to my followers !! I see y’all in my activity, and I wanna let you know that I love you from the bottom of my heart !! At this point, I’m more of an update blog than a fanfic blog LOL :’) And if you follow me because you’ve stumbled through my fics, I just want to say 🤯 what?! It blows my mind that anyone reads my work, let alone enjoys it. I never would have though that I’d find solace in reading and writing considering I’m a full on STEM nerd. In conjunction with that, I literally started writing fiction 7 months ago to this day. I didn’t even realize that it would lead me to such amazing connections. With so many lovely people, popping in and out of my dashboard, inbox/DMs, and activity page, my heart b u r s t s with love!! Your interactions mean the world to me, even the most minute things like reblogs make my heart flutter. I really do check the reblogs to see if anyone has left a tag. Single words and keyboard smashes mean the world to me too !! Before I was a fic writer, I was just a silent reader. I always admired writers for the worlds they craft, the characters they develop, and the plots they devise, all for it to come together in one cohesive work of literature. Now that I have a vague understanding of what that’s like, I know that it’s nothing short of strenuous. Words are so powerful, and although I’m a really sensitive sap, I’ve read so many things that hit me to the core, and now I’m sure to tell the authors how much I enjoy their fics. If they went through hours (perhaps days/weeks/months) of drafting, writing, editing, and formatting, a quick comment from the reader really doesn’t hurt !! It’s the most rewarding thing a writer could ever ask for. As an amateur author myself, being on the receiving end is the thing that keeps me going !! I promise you, I don’t take any of it for granted. Your words seriously resonate with me, and it’s a huge motivator for me !! I hope that in the new year, I can work on new pieces for you all (as much as I don’t want to make up excuses, juggling life is not easy as a student!!) I always say that I write for myself, and as true as that is, I want to share my stories with you lovely people !! I pour my heart and soul into my work, and the build up of excitement is nothing if it means I can’t share it with someone else. So, old supporters, new supporters, look out for new content in the future. I hope you’re as excited as I am for the new year!! Please take care, y’all, and remember that I love you. My inbox is always open 💌 So let’s be friends 😇

[princepestilence]

2020′s “worth it” things.

I think it’s pretty safe to say that 2020 was a uniquely bad year for everyone. There’s a lot of things that made this year even harder, though, not least of all the fact it was coming off the back of 2019, which was a deeply difficult year for me in many ways. I went into 2020 with high hopes for getting back on track with my life after being sick for so long, and things... did not go as anticipated. 

All this said, as I started compiling this list, I realised that despite everything else this year had going on, an incredible amount of really good, life-changing things happened for me too, and I want to celebrate that, so here it is: 2020 was Surprisingly Good, and Here’s Why. 

In no particular order:

health! I had surgery earlier this year and it fixed basically everything: the pain and nausea I was living with every day is gone now, and I feel so, so much better. I’ve been able to start getting back into a more normal kind of life throughout this year and hopefully, this won’t ever be a problem again. I’ll be able to live pretty normally going forward (apart from check-up tests now and then). I can’t ever take up kickboxing again, which is kind of disappointing, but in the scheme of things, that’s okay. This is a load-bearing change and because of it, so much else has been/will be possible for me, and I am so glad. 

holiday in Melbourne! Clair and I went on our first proper holiday together, before the plague. It was so much fun and it’s hard to believe that happened this year: the past is really feeling like a different country right now. But hopefully we’ll be able to do something like this again before too long, because I absolutely loved it. We saw a gallery, the aquarium, went to the theatre and night markets, swam in a pool by ourselves some fourteen stories above the city with a thunderstorm swirling outside the glass walls, and I’d love to do it all again. 

editing work. The project I’ve been working on has been finished and sent off for publishing, and I’ve been given a new contract and a new project, which is very nice. It feels great to be building up my resume--and it’s a huge compliment to be rehired so many times over. I’ve also been doing some editing work on the side, for various ttrpgs, etc. and I’m keen to do more of that too.

summer session teaching. I taught a summer session at the beginning of this year (back when the fires were happening), and now I’m teaching a different summer session again now. I really didn’t think I would ever teach again, after the collapse of academia this year, so it’s been delightful to have this chance. I’m hoping next year I’ll be able to do more, somehow. 

written over 70k+ words. I didn’t expect to be able to write nearly as much as I have this year, but I’m thrilled. It’s so nice to do and I’m looking forward to doing more of the same next year as well. 

got an apartment!! Finally! It only took about two deeply exhausting, stressful months where neither of us could support hobbies or mental health or general well-being because we were too busy trying to keep afloat while trying to find somewhere to live. But the important thing is that it’s done now. We get the keys in four days. I can’t wait. 

reconnected with a great friend. Last year I really struggled to maintain a lot of friendships. Being sick took most of my energy and attention, and sapped a lot of the cheerfulness and enthusiasm I wanted to have in relationships. This year, I’ve done a lot better, and I’ve been able to reconnect with a friend I’ve missed in a really positive, excellent way that brings me joy daily. 

joined a writing group! Connected to above, I’m now part of a regular weekly writing group of cool, talented people, and I’m hyped. It’s so fun and it feels so healthy to have this regular contact and conversation. It’s very much what I was missing and looking for, and I hope post-plague I’ll be able to find something similar in person too, so that I can have a local and international writing circle to bounce ideas and workshop with.   

ran a Dread game! It went so well and I had a ton of fun. I overprepared by a lot, but it was a terrific learning experience, and I’m itching to do it again soon. I’ve also got my hands on Monster of the Week (and am apparently getting Blades in the Dark as a late Christmas present from my little brother), and I’m very keen to get more into GMing, because I think this is where my passion lies. 

played D&D! And I’m loving it. I got hugely pulled into Dimension 20 this year and also finally played at the table properly for a campaign. I’m still very baby but it’s something I can definitely see myself getting into, and I hope we’re able to resume weekly games in the new year. I was very nervous before starting, but I’m getting my confidence more and more as we play. 

didn’t reconnect with some people from the past. At the beginning of 2019, I ended things with some friends I used to have, and it was hard to get to that year anniversary. Throughout the year there were some major temptations to reach out again, but I didn’t and I’m proud of that. They weren’t good relationships to be in, and I’m in a healthier, happier place without them. 

saw Six the Musical! And it was so great. I really wish I could have seen it again before the plague struck. I’m hoping it’ll come around again in the next few years, because once really wasn’t enough. 

I got a triple helix piercing! I’ve wanted this for years but this year I actually went and got it. I really love it. I’ve still got the plain titanium posts in while it heals 100% but I’m going to get hoops and fun ones soon and start switching them in and out for the thrill of it. 

backed some super exciting stuff on kickstarter! Kind of a weird entry but I’m so excited for it. There’s a gorgeous tarot deck coming from an artist whose work I’ve been following since I started on tumblr, and then Wanderhome is coming out about midway next year and I am very hyped to try it. We’re going to live that Beatrix Potter fantasy. 

saw my family. Earlier in the year I caught up with some cousins I haven’t seen since we were like twelve, and then for Christmas I saw the other side of my family, who I haven’t seen since Christmas 2018. It was really nice and I’m hoping we can keep in contact more, especially because my nieces and nephews are growing up so fast now. 

great year for games. Not really anything to do with me, but something I’m very grateful for. I’ve had such a good time with the titles that have come out this year: Hades, Monster Camp, Spiritfarer, Animal Crossing, Pokemon Sword, Megaquarium DLC, etc. Truly kept me sane (enough) at certain points. My switch also got fixed and returned to me recently, which is also very cool and good. 

started the program. Probably the single biggest, most impactful change this year, apart from surgery. It takes up a lot of my time and brainspace and energy, but it’s a lot better than the alternative, which did the same but in an evil way. I’ll be returning to it officially in exactly two weeks, and mostly how I feel about that is optimistic and happy. I’m excited to be well, which is an interesting feeling and mindset. I want to be doing better and I’m proud of myself for everything I’ve done this year to work towards that, because at no point so far has any of it been easy or fun. 

roller skating! I went roller skating (with Clair) for the first time in about ten years, and I didn’t stack it even once. There were a few close calls but it was a great time and I’m keen to go back and get good at it again. I’ve missed it all these years, and I think it’s going to be a super fun date night going forward. 

[alias-midnight]

Warm Mornings

This is my first one-shot for Tumblr :). Feel free to request!

Warnings: none

★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

  Nova woke up, feeling the warmth of the sun through the window. She stirred, stretching her legs and her arms. The sheets of the bed were crinkled, and the comforter was covering the bottom half of her body. She opened her eyes, surrendering to the morning. Adrian was still asleep beside her. He was practically glowing. Nova weighed her options, but she eventually decided to get out of bed. She only had on some shorts, and one of Adrien's pajama shirts. Nova thought about putting on a bra but decided against it.

  She walked to the kitchen, where she started brewing some coffee. Nova paced around the kitchen, grabbing ingredients for breakfast. She didn't cook often, but Adrien always enjoyed her meals; she wanted to surprise him. Nova decided on omelets. She diced peppers, added cheese, and crispy bacon to the eggs. Nova was too focused on cooking to notice a muscular pair of arms wrap around her middle. She wasn't even startled.

   Adrian kissed in between Nova's shoulders and rested his head on top of hers. 

   "Good morning, sunshine." He hugged her closer.

   Nova smiled, "Good morning, handsome. I hope you're hungry."

   Adrian hummed in response, kissing the top of Nova's head.

   The two stood like that until Nova was finished cooking. Adrain slipped away to get out plates and utensils. Nova would never say anything, but she missed his arms around her already.  Nova prepared their plates and brought them to the table. Adrian walked back into the kitchen, now wearing his glasses. He gave her a dorky grin when their eyes met. They both took their seats at the table.

   Nova glanced at Adrian; he had been working out more recently. His muscles were more defined; Nova would be lying if she said she didn't find it extremely attractive. Adrian caught her stare and smirked, Nova just rolled her eyes.

   "How's the food? Is there too much of anything?" She asked him.

   Adrian looked surprised, "Everything is just perfect. Thank you for making breakfast."

   Nova smiled softly, "It's not a huge deal, I like cooking."

   Adrian only smiled in return, "What do you want to do on our day off? Anything specific?"

   Nova thought about it for a minute, but she didn't want to go out today. She just wanted to stay home with Adrian. "I don't want to do anything specific today. I just want to stay home with you. If you want to go out we can though!" She didn't want to seem demanding. 

   Adrian blushed a little, "Of course we can stay home, cuddle, watch movies. Whatever you want."

   It was Nova's turn to blush. She truly felt like she didn't deserve this wonderful boy. She stood up from her chair, grabbing her plate and Adrians. They had both finished eating. "Thank you, Adrian." She kissed him on the cheek.

   "No thanks needed, I just like seeing you happy." 

   She happily rolled her eyes he was such a sap sometimes.

   She took the dishes and placed them in the sink. She then headed back to the bedroom, where Adrian was waiting with open arms. She found herself smiling again. She laid down on his chest and in return, he enveloped his arms around her.

   She looked up at his face. He looked so relaxed and calm, she couldn't help but grin again. Adrian smiled back at his beautiful girl. He kissed her lips softly. Nova nuzzled back into his chest and arms.

   "I love you, Adrian." She spoke against his skin.

   Adrian held her closer than before, "I love you too. More than you'll ever know."

[let-it-raines]

Catch Me If You Can (14/?)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

A/n: So I got the impression that you guys were excited about the last chapter? I didn’t think it was too slow of a burn until I realized how many words were in the first 13 chapters. lol. Anyways, here’s some more words and a lot more feelings shared. All my thanks to @resident-of-storybrooke ❤️

AO3: Beginning | Current

Tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |

Tag list: @galaxyzxstark @eala-captian @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings @thejollyroger-writer

-/-

Killian’s tracing the words “I love you” into Emma’s back. It’s a risky move, something he shouldn’t do, but he started doing this without truly realizing it. And then he couldn’t stop.

He loves her.

He loves her so much that he can feel it in every inch of his body, from the pounding of his heart to the emotion stuck in his throat and the way that his foot keeps tracing up and down her calves. Logically, he knew this was happening. There was no way that he couldn’t. He knew it was happening by the way that he spends his days wanting to see her, wanting to make her smile. He knew it was happening by the way that her laugh makes happiness settle in his stomach, and he knew that it was happening by the way that he’s wanted to tell her everything about his day and everything about the days where she didn’t know him.

All of the signs were there, all of the knowledge, but there’s nothing quite like when the moment hits you and you know that you’re in love.

Cheesy, sentimental sap that he is.

But Emma makes him feel in a way that he hasn’t in years, and while that should terrify him, all it does is make him smile to himself whenever he thinks about her.

Maybe he’s a sap because he’s sated, their lovemaking overwhelming and wonderful and so damn satisfying even if it was the first time with a new person, or maybe it’s because he’s got his girlfriend with him in his bed when he keeps missing her no matter how often they seem to run in the same circles.

Dating in secret is difficult when all he’d like to do is kiss her before a game and carry that kiss with him through every pitch.

He’s in love, and he can’t tell her, not yet. She’s not ready. That much, he can most definitely tell. Emma is the one who has to set the pace here, not him.

So he’ll carry it with him like he has from the moment that he realized he loved her when they were on the flight to Toronto four days ago. Emma was sitting two rows in front of him, the side of her face in his vision, and he kept watching he animatedly talk with her hands to Ruby, the two of them laughing so much that several of his teammates looked forward to see what was happening.

She was happy, the light evident on her face, and his stomach settled as he thought of her completely in her element and how nice that was to see.

That’s when it all clicked.

He loves her.

It’s funny how such a small moment could make him realize everything.

Asking her out, that first time, is still something he’s not proud of for how it negatively impacted Emma, but selfishly, he’s thankful for how it’s turned out for him…for the both of them.

Having her here in his arms is everything.

Soft lips (her lips are so damn soft) are pressed against his chest and up the hollow of his throat, and he feels the smoothness of Emma’s skin moving against his. Watching her move above him in the dim lighting of his room, firm muscles mixing in with the soft curves of her breasts and her hips, had been the most glorious sight he’d ever seen, and he most definitely plans on seeing it again.

Tonight.

And in the morning.

As much as he possibly can.

Her moving above him and him moving within her…magnificent.

“You’re comfortable,” Emma sighs into his shoulder, and he twists his head to look down at her as his fingers keep moving, this time in undetermined patterns instead of three specific words. “And your winter coat could keep a family of four warm.”

She pats his chest then, her fingers threading into the thick patch of hair, and he chuckles as his lips press into her nose.

“It’d be too bloody painful to wax all of that hair off, so it’s staying.”

“You would look weird without it.”

“Thanks, darling.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Aye, I do.” Her fingers mess with his hair some more, weirdly calming his heartbeat, and when she grabs onto the chain with his mother’s ring, he lets her, the silver reflected in the light. “What else would you be able to grab onto when you’re riding me like earlier?”

“Dirty,” she mock gasps, kissing his shoulder.

“I try.”

They lapse into a comfortable silence, one he wouldn’t trade for anything, and he wonders if he should dip his head and start kissing her again as his body hums with anticipation in what could be or if he should fall into sleep when Emma makes the decision for him by speaking.

“Did it…can I ask you about something?” Emma whispers.

“Anything.”

“You’re probably going to regret that.”

“I promise I won’t.”

Emma nods her head, her nose brushing under his collarbone, before she’s dragging her foot up his calf so that a shiver runs down his spine. He might regret talking when it means they can’t be doing other things. “Why haven’t you been pictured with a woman in so long when you used to get pictured with one every other night? I don’t mean to – it’s a dumb question. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“No, no,” he promises even as a heavy weight settles in his stomach, anchoring him to his spot as his mind races for an answer when he’s always known the truth. “It’s fine, love. You deserve to know.”

“Not if you don’t want to share,” Emma insists, her eyes pleading with him.

She’s nervous. She thinks she’s overstepped, but she hasn’t. He loves her, and she doesn’t know some of the biggest parts of his life. They have all of the time in the world to share, but he’s feeling so open tonight that he wants to share now.

There’s the chance that her mind could change after this, but he thinks that if anyone can understand a broken heart, it’s Emma. Or he at least has this hope.

“When I was twenty-two,” he starts, fiddling his fingers against his chest as he takes a deep breath to calm himself, “I met Milah. She was…she meant so much to me, and I very quickly fell in love with her. It was a whirlwind, I think. Looking back, it’s easy to see that, but at the time, it felt like I never could have enough moments with her. I – ”

He stumbles for words, his mind not sure how to tell the story. He’s never had to relay his heartbreak like this, and he thinks Emma knows from the way she threads their fingers together and then rests their joined hands on his chest.

“You okay?” She whispers the words, but he hears them loud and clear.

“Yeah, love. I’m fine.” He smiles down at her before looking at the ceiling, finding it easier not to have to look into those eyes of hers. “Milah was married. I didn’t – I didn’t know at first, and by the time that I did, I was so in love that I didn’t care. So, I made do with the fact that she had this other life for another year until she showed up at my apartment and told me that she was ending us so that she could focus on her husband and her son that I didn’t know about. It was…the hardest thing I’d been through after my mom and my father, and I just…I lost it, Emma. I thought we were going to get married. I had this foolish hope that things would work out for us, and I couldn’t even hate her for leaving me because who was I to keep a family apart when I would have given anything to grow up with happy parents? I don’t know – I hope she’s happy, that her son is happy too.”

“When did you two break up exactly?” Emma asks quietly, still very obviously unsure of how to act in this situation.

“Four years ago.”

He watches the lightbulb go off in Emma’s head, watches her eyes widen and her lips part, and he’s glad that she’s figured it out. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist.

“Killian, all of the partying and drinking and sleeping around – that was because you were heartbroken, wasn’t it? You were trying to cope?”

“Yes.”

And then Emma’s shifting, her body moving away from his, and his heart nearly shatters at the thought of her leaving him already when he sees that she’s simply moving on the bed, sitting with her back straight and her legs crossed over the other as she stares down at him, only half of her breasts covered with the white comforter. Something about that makes him chuckle. It’s like the fact that an hour ago his mouth was lavishing her there, and now she’s covering herself.

Funny how things change.

“I’m sorry,” she sighs, genuine remorse painted on her features. “That’s really fucked up, and I’m sorry for any remarks I’ve made about it in the past. That was…you should be able to do whatever the hell you want, and I’m sorry that you’ve been crucified for simply trying to live your life. I don’t – you didn’t deserve to have your heart broken like that.”

“I don’t think anyone deserves to have their heart broken.”

“Eh,” Emma scoffs as she pushes her hair back, the comforter falling around her waist. “I would say my exes most definitely deserve to have their hearts broken. Assholes can have their hearts broken.”

He can’t help but laugh at her and the casual way that she says this, a slight shrug of her shoulders. There’s something so effortless in the way that Emma acts even when he does know that she’s calculated and guarded. It’s a bit disarming, but then again, so is Emma.

“You want to share horror stories with me tonight? Or have I already dampened the mood too much?”

Her brows furrow together, lips pursing, and then she’s learning forward and taking both of his hands in hers, gently squeezing. “Hey, no. I know I’m not the best at words and feelings, but how you feel is how you feel. That’s not something to be ashamed about. You had what sounds like a really great love that had a bad ending for you, and it’s okay to be upset or hurt or sentimental. I think that’s pretty human actually.”

“And who said you weren’t good with words and feelings?”

“Every man I have ever dated.”

“I’ve never said that.”

“Just wait.” She holds her hands up before crawling over the mattress and standing on the floor, the curves on her backside on full display to him as she rummages through his bag to pull out his Vandy sweatshirt, the one that she seems to have a fondness for. He has a fondness for the way that it falls just below her ass. “Sorry, I was cold.” “You just wanted to steal my sweatshirt. You don’t have to lie.”

Emma winks before crawling back into bed and getting back under the covers with him, only the smallest bit of space between them. “Exactly. So, you want to hear about the shitty exes who broke my heart?”

The part of him that wants to know every part of Emma is desperate to know all of the things that make her tick, but he’s also not sure how he can hear about men mistreating Emma and breaking her heart. He can’t understand how anyone could do that to her.

But if they’re sharing tonight and she truly wants to…

“Only if you feel like sharing. We don’t have to do the whole tit for tat thing every time we share something dark.” Emma nods, her bottom lip tugged between her teeth. “I think I feel more comfortable doing it that way, if I’m honest. It makes me feel…less screwed up, I guess.”

“Share away then, Swan.”

“Okay,” she sighs, messing with the sleeves of his sweatshirt. “There’s this guy, Walsh. He’s actually, like, in a room on the floor below us because he works with me, and we dated for maybe a year.” Her brow raises like she’s doing the math in her head, and it’s cuter than it should be when he already knows that this story isn’t going well. “I’m not sure if I loved him, but I think I almost did. He went through so much of my career with me, was there when I got the job working for the Yankees, and I don’t know – it was such a happy time in my life that I didn’t see the signs when I should have.”

“Signs of what?”

“Cheating. And belittling me for my job, making me feel like I was less of a journalist or wasn’t good enough to do the job. And, I mean, obviously the fact that he was fucking someone else hurt me, but I think all of the little comments hurt worse because I’d already been through all of that before.”

This guy is a fucking bastard, and he doesn’t deserve Emma. No one who treats her like that does.

“From all of the asshole men who have demeaned you for your job?” he prods, trying to encourage her in her story.

“Yeah, kind of, but mostly just the one,” she mumbles, her eyes shying away from him. He doesn’t blame her for that. He did the same thing. He also knows that he felt infinitely better when Emma reached for his hand, so he does the same, twining their fingers together and resting them in the mattress between them, the both of them looking ahead as Emma talks. “There are a lot of reasons why I’m so passionate about being treated fairly in my job. For one, it’s because it’s what is right and fair. But also, it’s because when I was at NYU, I started dating Neal. I was still…I was struggling with accepting love from pretty much anyone other than David, so when he came around and treated me nicely and made me laugh and was just this really fun guy who made me feel good, I fell for him. I – ”

She takes a deep breath, and he squeezes her hand, trying to encourage her that it’s alright. They’re two people with complicated pasts, ones that never seem to be fully out there, and she’s not alone in all of this.

A part of him wants to tell her that he loves her and that it’s okay, but that would send Emma running all the way back to New York. She may have feelings for him and be in this with him, but there’s such a thing as heightened emotions and too much too quickly.

All the time in the world, he reminds himself. They have all the time in the world.

“I didn’t realize it first, you know? They say that love is blind, and I feel like this is what people mean by that. I didn’t realize that he was belittling me for my major or my job. I didn’t realize that he was telling me that my job wasn’t for women, that I couldn’t do it, that I wouldn’t be good enough for it. And then it spread into other aspects of my life. Neal told me that Ruth and David, that they weren’t my family, that they didn’t love me. He was the only one who loved me and could take care of me. I was with him for four years, and he has me so convinced that I was worthless that I believed it. Thinking back on it…God, I was a fucking idiot, and I hate that it still impacts so much of my life today. I still struggle with how I see Ruth despite the fact that I know that I love her. I still struggle every time someone thinks I only have my job because I’m attractive and that I don’t actually know what I’m talking about. I still – I’ve let Neal affect every aspect of my life, and he didn’t even stick around for me to break up with him. He just…he left one day and never came back like he was some kind of ghost.”

Fucking hell.

No. Just no.

Screw all of that. Emma doesn’t deserve any of that, doesn’t deserve to have been treated like shit by so many people. The fact that she still trusts anyone is most likely a miracle, and he can’t even believe what he just had to hear.

Every single bit of him is angry, furious really. So much about her clicked together for him just now. She’s never been given her credit, never been given her due, when it comes to her career, because she’s been belittled this entire time. He was someone who belittled her, even if he didn’t intend to, and of all of that added to everything she’s already gone through.

Personally and professionally, Emma Swan has been demeaned, and he can’t decide if he’d rather hug her or go out and punch the daylights out of her ex-boyfriends and every other person who has hurt her.

But none of this is about him at the end of the day.

It’s about Emma.

Sighing a deep sigh, he brings Emma’s hand to his lips and kisses each knuckle before sliding down in the bed and encouraging her to move with him so that they face each other, their joined hands in between their chests and his right hand on her hip, thumb rubbing circles into her skin.

The tears in her eyes make them all the more green.

“You, darling,” he begins, his voice quiet even if he was intending for it to be louder, “are one of the bravest, strongest people that I’ve ever met. Seriously. You’re a badass, and you’re also kind and quite frankly, hysterical.”

“I mean, I am hilarious.”

“Exactly.” He winks at her, and a smile curves over her lips. It’s soft, but it’s there. “I don’t know how anyone could ever treat you like you’re not worth everything. It’s unfathomable to me. Those men, every single one who has hurt you, are in the wrong, and they never deserved you. The fact that you’re open to letting other people in your heart after all of that astounds me.”

“You did kind of have to convince me.”

“You asked me out, Swan.”

“Technically you asked first.”

That sobers him for a moment while his heart sinks. “I’m sorry about that again. It goes at the top of my asshole moments.”

“Hey, hey,” she soothes, inching a bit closer to him so that he can feel her warmth and smell the vanilla that’s still in her hair, “I forgave you for that. We’ve worked it out. I don’t know why I’m crazy enough to give you, us, a shot, but I am. You don’t have to apologize anymore. We’re moving past that, okay?”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Completely” There’s a squeeze of his hand, and it rights his heart. “I think we’re actually doing pretty good at this relationship thing, if I’m honest. Did you know we have all of our serious conversations when in a bed?”

“That’s the best place to have them.”

“Is it?”

“Mhm,” he hums, trailing his hand up her body so that he can run his fingers over her cheeks, feeling the soft skin there as she smiles, “because we can either go to sleep afterward or have sex or even have just a bit of a cuddle.”

“Why not all three?”

“I like the way you think, Swan.”

And then he’s leaning in to guide his mouth over hers, something soft and timid that quickly escalates into a rough and dirty kiss. This is not at all how he expected his night to go, but then Emma showed up at the pool when he was trying to work out some of the kinks in his shoulder, and everything has spiraled from there.

No part of him regrets it.

It’s been one of the most intimate nights of his life, physically and emotionally, and he’d like to stay wrapped up in it as his body climbs over Emma’s. His teeth drag across her bottom lip, enjoying the little sounds that she’s making, and their hips roll together. He’s still bare of clothes while she’s only in his sweatshirt, and his fingers mess with the hem, pulling it higher and higher so he can get that feeling of skin against skin.

He hasn’t had enough. He needs more.

Their first time, just under two hours ago, comes back to him in flashes, and while he knows that they were hurried and desperate, it also felt like the moment lasted forever. He got to explore her body as she got to explore his, but they need more and more time.

Not right now.

It doesn’t take long before he’s hard and wanting, desperate to feel Emma’s warmth wrapped around him again, and his fingers deftly toy with her, riling her up as she writhes underneath him, more keening whines escaping her lips until she tells him that she needs more, that she needs him.

He reaches over for the package of foil, ripping it open and sliding it on himself, before he slowly sheaths himself inside of her, biting onto the side of her neck hard enough to leave a bruise. It’s perfect, the way she feels around him, tight and warm and wet, and he has to center himself before he slowly starts rocking within her, pleasure already trickling up and down his spine.

“Divine,” he murmurs into her neck as his hips flex and his elbows move to steady himself all the while Emma’s nails dig into the skin of his back and her ankles hook just above his ass. He expects crescent moons to be tattooed on his skin by the time that it’s over. “You’re divine.”

“K-Killian,” she moans in response as he starts to get into a rhythm, one that seems to be working for the both of them.

“I know, love. I know.”

His hips thrust and roll into hers, and when she shifts, he slips that little bit deeper into her, heat covering his skin and making him sigh against Emma’s mouth as their tongues snake together. It’s messy and rough, and the sound of their skin moving against each other is all that he can focus on as he loses himself in the softness of the woman who he loves and the feel of his chain pressing between them.

There’s something about the coolness of the metal on their warm skin that does something to him.

When Emma’s hand moves between them to brush at where they’re joined, he knows that she’s close, knows that she’s coming apart in their desperate coming together, so he arches his hips up to give her more space and snaps into hers at a pace that has them both panting and falling apart one after the other.

Holy hell.

Nothing is ever going to be enough when it comes to Emma even though she is more than enough.

Always.

Later, after they’ve cleaned up and showered, washing the sweat and chlorine off of their bodies, they sprawl out on top of the bed, their feet stretched up across the headboard and their gaze toward the speckled ceiling. He’s not entirely sure how they got into this position. He thinks it was Emma who did it first, her legs obviously a little antsy, and she’d rolled around until she got comfortable.

It is actually pretty comfortable, and he wonders if they’re so exhausted and sleep deprived that everything would be comfortable to them.

But he’s not exhausted enough to fall asleep. Not at all. It’s been a rollercoaster of a night, but it’s one of those nights he’d never like to end.

Emma’s stomach rumbles, and they get into a conversation about how Graham usually cooks for she and Ruby, especially when they’re both traveling, and that he’s probably the only reason she doesn’t starve. She also reminds him that he promised to bake for her, and he rekindles that promise, his mind already trying to figure out when exactly they can do that. It’s a busy season, the two of them live full lives, but they’ll figure it out. They both want to make the effort, and they will.

She also tells him that David is thinking about helping her out by commentating on a game sometime this season, and he’s so damn proud of her that his heart could very well burst.

It’s relaxing and calming and absolutely everything just to be able to talk to someone about his day outside of baseball, even if they do naturally fall into shop talk, and she listens as he talks about Liam and Elsa and the ridiculousness of having them as his support system. He hasn’t truly had someone to talk to about his friends and family until now, and it’s still taking some getting used to.

But he loves her and keeps falling more in love with her, so he thinks that they have all of the time in the world.

That’s what he keeps telling himself because he has the hope for it.

All the time in the world.

[slowbladed]

you know with kh3 ended, the xehanort chronicles finished i have a lot of thoughts on my history, my experiences, my memories...

i got into the game in july of 2017. i got it on amazon, i sat down and just played it. it took me about a week to finish everything except 2.8. i normally dont really do that with video games. in fact, kingdom hearts is the first game that really pulled me in like that. and i always found it funny.

see, growing up, i didn’t have a ps2, or a gba, or a ds. but my godparents did, and my god brother wanted to desperately show me kh1. and i did. i played it and i couldnt get past any of the worlds. so i kind of just put it to the side and forgot about it. i was maybe 5. a year or so later, he tried again with kh2. i played it, and i would always play roxas’s story. i just loved roxas and loved doing skate tricks. but otherwise i watched him play it, and one day he gave me his gba+chain of memories to play for a bit. i got lost, but i met larxene and was big gay. and i remember, i remember my friend playing kh2, and getting stuck at demyx and beating it for him. i remember loading up my old ps2 kh2 save file that someone played on and fighting xemnas. for a long time i had a kh2 poster. kh1 was the first cd i ever got. simple and clean was something i listened to all the time, both the orchestra and the opening.

my memory is awful. i dont remember much of anything from my childhood because of severe abuse growing up. many memories, both good and bad, i oppressed because of how awful it was. but its funny, i still remember that feeling of happiness hearing sora talk about hearts and things. and i always found it funny that kh is one of the things that stick in my heart, and it wasn’t even the game that kept me together through my childhood (that goes out to halo). i still remember getting lost in agrabah in com. i still remember fighting xemnas for the first time. i still remember all these things, but most of my childhood is just gone. you can argue that the reason i focus so much on memories in my writing, that i think so much on this is because im trying to fill the hole of my childhood.

when i was 13, i met one of my long time friends on tumblr. he’d always say “please get into kh” and i would reply “maybe one day”. even funnier, i only bought kh because toy story was confirmed in it. i love toy story, and thats the thing that made me go “yeah, ill get into the series. ill do it for toy story”. i was 19.

of course my friends joked “pt youre finally getting into it!” “it only took you 15 years” “i think your favorite character will be xion, marluxia, etc” and i laughed at them. i told them “xion wont be my favorite” “im only doing it for toy story” but.. part of me feels like i wasnt. part of me feels like i was doing it to reconnect with my childhood. and this is the first time im really admitting it. that part of me missed that nostagia. 

i sat down and played it. and i dont know what happened, but i kept playing it. i kept playing it because, even if kh1 wasnt great, there was something to it. i fell in love with marluxias character, but there was one character that resonated with me the most: xion.

and it might sound so stupid, it might sound so fucking STUPID but my biggest fear is being forgotten. my belief is that, even if i die, if people remember me deep in their hearts that i wont die. that ill live on and once people have forgotten me that is when i’d truly will die. man, i even had this idea before i got into kh and i thought it was so DUMB growing up. but seeing xion, seeing her based so much on memories, eating ice cream, laughing with her friends, being abused by the organization, then being forgotten, it resonated so deeply inside me. people think i joke when i say i cried whenever xion comes on screen, but she means so much to me. i guess you could even say that i see her as a reflection of myself. that the reason i cry, the reason i resonate with her, is because i understand how she feels. and its so dumb! its so dumb but its how i feel.

and... then i beat all the games. i beat them and talked to my friends. i made this blog. i made new friends. i became even closer to friends i lost contact with. i reached out to them with kh and we fell back with our usual BS as if a day never went by. we laughed, we cried... one friend that was on call with me through KH2, one that i fell a little out of contact with, cried with me when i beat kh2.

i still remember... i still remember crying when roxas and axel sat on the clock tower. eating ice cream. i dont know why. i didnt even watch days yet. i didnt even like axel. i didnt even get roxas. but that scene always stuck out to me. something about it...

i still remember screaming “THATS NOT RIKU!” when kairi revealed ansem underneath the hood. i remember singing awfully out of tune simple and cleans. i remember joking with my friend “hey that looks like castle oblivion!” in the bbs opening and him laughing at me when that part was revealed. i remember dreaming of xigbar serving me food at a restaurant and my friend telling me something important is going to happen august 28th and sure enough lauriam is revealed

and, this has gotten so long. im a giant sap. im a giant emotional sap that has been so affected by kingdom hearts that watching the current one end and seeing a new one open makes me almost wish i could live in his bubble where i could always experience the first time playing it. im a big sap that wants to finally get all my thoughts, all my emotions down, but even i know that no matter what words i use it can never convey what i want to say. im that one guy who, at the end of kh3 cried so hard and for so long because its over, some of these characters ill never see again. im that idiot that cried midway writing this.

im genuinely sad its over. not in a bittersweet way but just outright sad. but i have to remember that even if i played those games all those years ago, that even if i wont be able to feel that feeling playing the games for the first time, that it gave me... some semblance of a childhood. i was able to experience new things like a kid would. to follow sora through the games and watch him grow up. and its dumb, maybe, but.... thinking about it.... i think thats why the game has made me feel this way. even if i didnt wait years between releases. even if i only waited 1 year for kh3... its still a valid experience and a valid emotion.

this has gotten so long but... a lot of this stuff i never really talked about, or even admitted to anyone or myself and having this small piece of media end makes me sad to no end but. BUT.... i kind of got back something that i was missing. even if artificial, its still real to me.

[meimikana]

This one was actually written as a prompt from @ruakichan and posted on here, but I don’t feel like combing my tumblr to find it. So here it is again!

Dissidia Didn't Want Them: AO3 Fandom: Tales of Vesperia, Final Fantasy XIII-2 Pairing: Yuri/Flynn, Hope/Noel Rating: Teen Summary: Four hapless saps traveling together with not much to do.

P.S. The fic is under the cut for people who don’t wanna go to AO3 for whatever reason. Cheers~

---

"We'll be right back!" Yuri called out, waving back towards Flynn and Hope before heading off after Noel.

Smiling wryly, Hope could only shake his head in fond exasperation. "Like clockwork."

"Without fail," Flynn spread his hands out and sighed heavily at the entire situation. "Just can't ever stay put, can they? I swear, one of these days I'm going to put a leash on Yuri and never take it off."

"It's not a bad idea," Hope said smoothly, his expression taking on a knowing light as he glanced over at Flynn out of the corner of his eye. "Assuming we ever find our way out of this strange, seemingly pointless land, and assuming we make it back to my world somehow, which is highly improbable with our current odds, I suppose I could let you borrow one of mine to try out on him."

Flynn very nearly tripped, but managed to right himself a few seconds later without too much trouble. "Very funny," he grumbled, but there was little heat to it. He was used to far worse teasing from other areas.

"So sure I'm joking?" Hope's smile quirked up in amusement. "You've already seen just how enthusiastic Noel can be when he feels like it. With that knowledge in hand, such a conclusion isn't too difficult to arrive at."

Flynn stayed silent for the next half-mile of their meandering journey, likely mulling over the possibilities in his mind, before finally speaking up. "No, you're right. I have no way of knowing for sure. And frankly, you never can tell with people. No matter how well you might know somebody, they can still surprise you at the oddest times."

Hope chuckled. "Well, to be fair, I've always taken the saying "It's always the quiet ones." a little too literally. It makes things interesting though."

Flynn couldn't help but snort in response. "It does at that." He was smiling now though, his steps a little lighter and his shoulders a little less droopy thanks to a joke that may not even be a joke. There really was no telling with Hope. When they'd first met up, Hope had come across as quite serious and well put together, so it had been easy enough for Flynn to decide to go along with them. The fact that Hope and Noel were the first - and only - people they'd run across in this... place had helped as well. And really, that first impression hadn't actually changed much, it had just... grown. Hope was a natural born leader, but he was also a nice person. But also a devious one, especially when he was paying Noel back for something inconsequential. So no, leashes didn't seem like they'd be too far out of the ordinary for someone like Hope Estheim. He probably had one for every day of the week. Designer ones at that. Hmmm.

"You don't have one in purple, do you?"

---

The beast was quite big, with tufts of hair haphazardly sticking out of the rocky protuberances dotting the creature's body. They weren't part of a shell either, that was the damn thing's skin. Not exactly what Yuri would call a good prospect for dinner, much less getting back in one piece after a fight with it. The fact that it smelled like a sewer from downwind wasn't helping its case one little bit. If Noel thought that he was going to help at all with anything involving that thing, well, he had another thing coming. Such a happy lunatic...

"So what do you think?" Noel asked conspiratorially, an almost infectious grin plastered across his face.

"It's ugly," Yuri deadpanned. No way, no how, was he going to help Noel take that beast down. He preferred to stay in one piece, thank you very much.

"Well yeah," Noel shot back sarcastically, "That seems to be the theme of this stupid world, but that's beside the point. The point is what you think it will taste like."

"I don't know and I don't care," Yuri said blandly as he shifted around and started heading in the opposite direction from that hideous creature.

"Oh, come on," Noel practically whined after him, "Where's your sense of adventure?"

Yuri resisted the urge to snort in disbelief. "Not in my stomach." Sometimes he wondered about Noel's sanity, then he remembered Hope and didn't wonder anymore. Some things were truly meant to be, and not because of romantic ideals. No, sometimes it just took a lunatic to look after and care for another lunatic. "And don't even think about taking it down on your own. You might be able to," Yuri said conversationally as he continued to crawl away from that thing, "But then you'd have no way to cart it back to camp, because I sure as shit am not going to help you with that."

"You're no fun," Noel grumbled from behind him. Good, at least he was being smart and coming with instead of staying back. Hope wouldn't hold it against him if Noel really did do something that monumentally stupid, but Yuri preferred for his friends to stay in one piece, regardless of their state of sanity.

"I suggest we find something to hunt that won't end up having the texture of rocks," Yuri suggested as he arched an eyebrow and cast a look back at Noel. "Because I don't think our better halves will be amused if we bring back crap again."

Noel grimaced at the reminder. "Yeah... yeah, you're right. There is that. He'd probably freeze my butt again if I brought that thing back." Noel heaved out a dramatic sigh as they headed further into the brush. "Pity though, I bet it would've been real interesting."

---

It wasn't that Hope was spoiled or anything. Certainly, he'd spent his formative years as a "little rich boy", but circumstances had changed his outlook rather permanently. And really, there was no point dredging up those ancient memories again, especially not over something this stupid. So no, it wasn't that he was spoiled, and he was always prepared to rough it if the situation called for it (which it had several times throughout his life). But seriously, did everything in this godforsaken world have to taste so terrible? Animals and plants, it didn't matter which, there was always something off about the taste. At best, the wildlife came off as bland when cooked. Unfortunately, it rarely was at its best. The rabbit type creatures - that were ever so common - were outright rancid and impossible for even Noel to stomach. All the tuber roots they'd dug up so far had an odd sour note to them, but at least they were somewhat palatable. The birds were a crapshoot, literally. Hard to hunt and even harder to tell whether they'd end up edible or not. Honestly, Hope was beginning to suspect that their mysterious kidnapping and subsequent relocation to this terrible world was just an experiment to see how quickly they'd turn cannibal from the horrible food. They still had so little information to go on, so it was a feasible enough conclusion to arrive at.

"You feeling okay, Hope?"

Glancing over at Flynn, Hope managed to muster up a reassuring smile before turning his attention back to his distasteful meal. "I'm fine, just the usual problems with enjoying our typical dinner."

"Oh? Hmmm." Flynn hummed in curiosity, took a bite, chewed it thoroughly, then swallowed it down. "I don't know, it seems pretty decent tonight to me."

Hope shot him a disbelieving look before understanding dawned upon him. "Oh right, I keep forgetting that you have no sense of taste. This junk probably does taste just fine to you. Too bad that isn't a shareable trait."

"I have a sense of taste," Flynn grumbled defensively. Hope gave him another look, this one even more disbelieving, and Flynn deflated slightly. "Okay, so it's not the best, but I can taste things. You guys didn't have to ban me from cooking, you know. It's not like I could ruin this stuff that badly."

Hope snorted. "Never rule out the possibility of things getting worse, because the instant you get complacent it will get worse. Without fail." Flynn scowled irritably, but didn't argue the point. Hope gave him an apologetic smile, then took another small, measured bite out of his food. It wasn't the worst they'd had up until now, but it wasn't anywhere near being the best either. Ugh. What he wouldn't give for a little taste of civilization right about now.

---

Noel wasn't entirely sure how they'd gotten to chatting about their latest subject. Well, no, that wasn't quite true, he knew why. He just didn't know why why. Or something. Whatever. Despite having known their traveling companions for only a few weeks, he felt comfortable around Yuri, like they'd known each other for a really long time and were just catching back up on their recent goings-on. They didn't, of course, had only just recently met for the first time, but it didn't change that base feeling. Instincts maybe? Did it even matter in the end what the why really was? Probably not.

They'd come across another stream, this one a bit more promising, and had set up for another attempt at fishing. The last one had been disastrous with vicious, spiny fish that had ended on an extremely low note of bloody hands and empty bellies. Here's hoping there wouldn't be a repeat of that this time around. And so far it had been peaceful, though granted, they still hadn't gotten a bite yet. It could still go either way. Hope and Flynn were off foraging for veggies that hopefully wouldn't taste like ass again. It wasn't that he cared either way, but after awhile, it was pretty hard to ignore the fact that this planet was a smorgasbord of shitty tasting plant life and even shittier tasting meat critters. The sooner they found a way back home the better, to be honest. Noel wasn't sure he'd survive Hope's growing irritation with the local diet if it went on for much longer.

"You really shouldn't feel guilty about it," Yuri said finally after several long moments spent shared in silence. "But I'm sure you do anyway. It's hard not to when it involves a friend."

Noel swallowed heavily and nodded. He should have been able to do something, anything. But nothing had worked in the end, nothing had gotten through. Caius had stopped being rational a long time ago, probably even before he'd been born. All that had been left in the end was an end.

"But that's just the way things work out sometimes," Yuri continued, his tone deadly serious as he cast his line back out again. "There's really no right answer to something like that. Every choice is wrong, no matter which way you look at it. But you can't just sit idly by and let shit happen either, you have to do something regardless of it being wrong."

Noel nodded in reluctant agreement. There really hadn't been a choice in the end. Caius had been a friend, regardless of whether the man had still considered him one or not. To ignore his suffering, to let him compound it with countless sins, that would've been so very, very wrong. No, it hadn't been the "right" choice in the end, but it had been the only one that had afforded either of them any sort of peace. He could shoulder that burden, at least.

"It just boils down to what you can live with," Yuri said somberly as he gazed out over the water, a sad smile quirking at his lips. "It will always haunt you, of course; but some choices, no matter how horrible they seem, are so much easier to bear than others."

Letting out a heavy breath, Noel nodded once again. "I know. I just... wish it really were easier."

"Me too."

[couchpotatoaniki]

Thank you @atozfic​ for the tag. Also, I’m not surprised by your answer AT ALL, especially from how much you hate on ateez & pe, but you are a wonderful writer sO HAVE SOME CONFIDENCE-- /g

For the original post, click here

"Which of your own fics do you like and dislike most, and why?"

OH BOI, OKAY. So, I'll be splitting this into two--fanfics that I've uploaded on all platforms (and am most likely in the process of transferring over onto Tumblr), and fanfics uploaded on Tumblr only.

✍︎ Fanfics on Tumblr:

☞︎︎︎ Like

For me, it'd have to be my headcanon story line for both BTS and ATEEZ 'cause they're essentially the same. I mean, they're not even proper full-on fanfics, but I'm so in-love with the storyline, how I've chosen to present it, the versatility of the entire concept (since they're literally just a bunch of headcanons but still tied together neatly by an overshadowing plotline). I also like how it challenges me as a writer since I do my best to never repeat the same story (and the situations and context between them help make it easier for me too). Really, it's a way to flesh out my creativity without having so many stories/series I need to keep up with. So, in short, I just love my Stories From Alternate Universes Series.

☞︎︎︎ Dislike

Pretty much everything--jk jk. If I had to chose one, then I'd say it would be my Jungkook fanfic, Gentleman. Idk why, but this was the most disappointing one for me. Initially, I adored the concept (if you know me, you'd know I'm an absolute sucker for the Greek/Roman mythos (since sources show that the story of Cupid (Greek name Eros) and Psyche is strictly a Roman myth) as well as writing some twisted shit) but this felt very... underwhelming. First of all, I don't think it was executed as well as it should have been, making the whole thing seeming very... bland. In fact, it was not only bland, but it was sTUPID. Going back and re-reading it gave me a nasty case of cringe and I truly am sorry for all of those poor saps whose eyeballs had to read it 'cause it was tRASH. Secondly, I'm not a very good smut writer, or even a suggestive one at that, so the ending was not only very basic and (again) stupid, but it was also just very bad writing. Don't try to justify this fic, 'cause in my eyes, you never will. IT BELONGS IN TARTARUS--

✍︎ Fanfics in general:

☞︎︎︎ Like

SWEET ESCAPE oh my god, I love Sweet Escape so much. If you've had a glance at my masterlist, then you'll find the blub/synopsis/description/whatever else you wanna call it. But the basic idea of this mini-series is that it's about being transported to an unknown land (in this case, a land of sweets), with a heavy influence of Alice in Wonderland themes (I say 'themes', but it's essentially just an AU). Rereading it, I like how I've paced myself, how the characters have developed a lot better since there's a lot less pressure to cram it all in. If you've already noticed, I don't write more than 8k in one chapter--this is because I prefer writing series rather than oneshots; it's more my style to break things up into small posts with many chapters than one massive post. I don't have the attention span or the patience to do it all in one go, which is probably why I prefer my series/mini-series than my oneshots.

☞︎︎︎ Dislike

*sigh* Oh, Silence and Observation, the bane of my existence. This one's also a Jungkook fanfic, which is a probs not a coincidence since in my other platform, there was a lot of pressure to write JJK ff. I mean, there still is here, but I care a lot less now. As you can probably tell, I don't do well under pressure, so trying to get perfection from me will most likely result in a hot mess. On top of that, it was one of the first ones I ever wrote so it was gonna be trash from the get-go with my lack of experience. Now, this one mentioned language barriers, which isn't really addressed in fanfics, so I wanted to have a crack at it: angst-style ('cause how else was I supposed to? Fluff???). Obviously, since it was one of my first ones, I was more concerned about the getting across the angst than I was writing it well and portraying it properly. So yes, all in all, it was pure garbage and deserves to burn in Hell. Whether I'll actually rewrite it will deffo be a matter of internal debate, but I doubt it'll happen. AND WHAT'S WORSE, IS THE FACT THAT IT GOT MORE READS AND COMMENTS THAN ANY OF MY OTHER (MUCH BETTER) ONESHOTS so I pretty much have the same issue as Hyde (the person who tagged me). It feels like a punch in the gut :((

Also, special shout-out to Talk, my Jongho fic, which was basically me angsting over my own situation and feelings towards a certain person (they were absolutely 'pErFeCt' in everything except their personality)--and the writing wasn't even any good. It was basically just a shitty rant, and I am 99.9% sure that won't ever see the light of Tumblr.

Tagging (y'all don't have to if you don't want to 💜💛💙): @lovesanmotion @xjoonchildx

[mikeswheeler]

Happy One Year, Gain Train!

I’ve been apart of this GC that started out as a place to talk about Stranger Things for a whole year, today marking the official one year anniversary that this GC was formed - I’ll be honest, I wasn’t expecting this chat to really last, I’ve been apart of them before in the past and they usually die out with time, but somehow we’ve managed to stay just as strong (if not stronger) and I find that... really fucking incredible ??? It’s not even JUST a ST GC anymore, we literally talk about our day to day lives and other interests and it’s just amazing how well we bond over just about anything and everything. 

I didn’t have the time or motivation to really gif or put together a video in honor of this day, but I figured I’d be a huge sap and write to y’all directly. 

@eddiekaspbraks - Aimee, I don’t even know where to begin... you were the first internet friend I met in real life and I feel like that really set off the bond we have with each other to this day. I honestly don’t have the words to express just how much I care about you, like I’m talking I’d-die-for-you kind of care. I genuinely love you so much and I always feel like I can be my complete self around you, which is very hard to find so thank you for allowing me that. I’ve never quite had a best friend like you before in real life. I can’t say I love you enough and I wish you saw how truly incredible you are - You’re too hard on yourself, give yourself some room to breathe. 

@bill-denbroughs - SHELLY... you are the unproblematic favorite. You are the Mom of the group, you have so much light within yourself that just radiates without you even trying. I truly wish I had the aura that you had - Wholesome, genuine, pure, ambitious, positive as hell. I don’t think I’ve ever had a friend that keeps me grounded quite like you do. Thank you for reminding me when I’m being irrational, thank you for the warmth you provide in this group. 

@shesavedus - Syd, I have so much respect and admiration for you. I truly look up to you, I like how utterly ‘you’ you allow yourself to be. I see a lot of strength in you and I see how much care you put into the things you do and I just know you’re gonna go so far in life. Hell, everyone in this chat is gonna go so far in life. I’m betting all my money on that. I hope you’re able to notice all the good you got going on in your soul because there’s a lot of it. Thank you for your honesty and humor you provide in this group. You are truly one of a kind.

@reallylikeseggos - Alli, you shine so bright, I feel like I’m around a got damn shooting star when you’re around. You have so much personality and light and you’re so funny and it’s like, wow, wish that were me !! Even though we lost you to the Weebs, I still love you and I still admire you so much. I’m glad you’re more active in the chat these days, I’ve really missed your presence ! Thank you for being such a pure, genuine human being. We need more people like you in this world. 

@themikewheelers - Tori, I hope you know that I care about you a lot and that you’re basically stuck with me - you know I’d like never leave your side. Sometimes life is shitty towards you and I hate that so much, I wish I could take away the bad things and give you only good. You’re so freaking funny and we always have a good laugh and there’s so many memes and inside jokes with you which I appreciate. I can’t wait for Season 2 where we’ll cry about Emo Mike Wheeler together, it’s gonna be great!

@protectmike - Cait, I swear, you are so powerful and sometimes it intimidates me but in the best possible way ?? Like it’s definitely not a bad thing, it’s a really, really good trait. I just admire you so much for your exuberant persona and I love how shameless you are and you’re HILARIOUS and I feel like I’m talking to the got damn SUN when you’re in the chat. You’re way too hard on yourself, I don’t know why you are but stop it! You’re seriously perfect just the way you are, never change for anyone. 

@flea-and-the-acrobat - Sam, you’re like never on Tumblr but I’m forcing you to get on the hecking app to see this! ANYWAYS,,, Sam, you’re such a genuine person like you are the epitome of friendly and you just want what’s best for everyone and you have such good morals and I’m like ??? This kid is way too mature for his age, I swear ! You’re such an amazing person and I know things have been rough lately but I have hope that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel and you are destined for such wonderful things. 

@stevenrogers - Marvin, I’m really glad you’re more active in the chat than you used to be (there was a period where you were not really there and I MISSED YA DUDE) - You always have the best freaking memes, I swear, like I can always count on you to lighten the mood of whatever is going on. You’re so blunt and funny and a really hecking good person ??? It’s really hard to come by people as real and genuine as you are, you’re definitely a diamond in the rough.

@cloeggo - CHLOE !!! I’m so glad you’re back in the chat and being active again, I’ve really missed having you around ! You are quite possibly one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met and you care so much about others, I’ve always loved how compassionate you are <3 I hope life continues to treat you well and you experience nothing but good things because that’s what you deserve ! <3

@the-weirdo-on-maple-street - Emma, you’re not very active in the chat these days, but I hope you know that I appreciate you so much and I love when you do pop in to say hi or to make a comment on something. I hope life is treating you well because I love ya so much and you’re such a lovely person and deserve the world! Maybe we’ll see more of ya when Season 2 drops, I hope so at least - I love having you around!!! <3

@eggogorgon - Dad, come home, we miss you... OKAY BUT SERIOUSLY, Blake where have you been ?? Y’all better be back for Season 2, if you ain’t there yelling about it with us I’m gonna be DISAPPOINTED ! But real talk, you’re a really cool dude and you make the best gifs wtf how do you have such a quality blog smh Talk about GOALS ! Anyways yeah, you’re really cool and I love seeing you on my dash and I just wish you were in the chat more smh WE MISS YOU !!! (also tbt when you unfollowed and refollowed me,,, thought we were friends...) 

@strangerwhee11ers - Adina, you’re never in the chat anymore and I see you occasionally in the other chat sometimes, but I MISS YA AND I HOPE LIFE IS TREATING YOU WELL ! I’m sure you’re just busy with life but yeah, I hope we see ya back for Season 2, we needa all yell together about the new content !! I love you so much !!! <3 

Overall, thank you to this group for providing me with some of the best memories of this past year and for always making my days lighter and brighter. Life would be a lot darker without them in it. Here’s to another year together! (I don’t even say hopefully, because I know we’ll still be kicking it for another year lmao we’re too ride or die for each other at this point!) Thank you all and I love you all so much, MWAH! <3