#i can't have these men lying to me like that... i don't accept deceit from most but especially not from the Danish

[weebsinstash]

I'm not typically a fan of pregnancy au stuff for hazbin because it introduces a hell lotta new questions, but anyways, I DO find it absolutely entertaining thinking about a Reader who did the nasty with Alastor and had kind of a friends-with-benefits situation with him and he does his whole 7 year disappearing act without warning you or telling you anything at all (assumedly because he did not have a choice or opportunity) and he comes back, knocking on your front door, "say, doll! What's say we mosey on over to our old favorite jazz club to catch up on old times?"

and suddenly peeking out from behind your back is just the cutest little fawn with a head full of curls who is very clearly Alastor's son, clutching at your apron, "Mama, isn't he the man you listen to those old recordings of? He sounds the same"

Alastor feeling this, this WARMTH in his chest as you invite him inside your home and it's completely different from the last time he was there, filled with everything your son could need, his drawings and report cards from that nice school you break your back to afford stuck lovingly on the fridge and a hot home-cooked meal currently cooling on the stove as Alastor's invited for some food... if he feels comfortable. You and him discuss privately where your son can't hear as you get all weepy, "I'm sorry, but when you disappeared, I couldn't... ASK you what you would have wanted... I didn't want to have some kind of, of PROCEDURE and you hate me for it... and even from the very first scan, I loved him so much... he's my entire world... I couldn't even CONSIDER... getting rid of him. He's my beautiful smart baby boy and i would die for him"

Genuinely I think it would be real funny if Alastor is initially quite jealous actually for having to share you with a CHILD, but the more time he spends around the young boy, the more he realizes, oh, this is quite the upstanding young fellow! His mama raised him right and he likes to help around the house, likes to read lots of books, loves all kinds of music, helps his mother on all the crosswords and word searches and puzzle books, and he's smart enough to suss out pretty quickly, "sir are you my father"

and the second your son receives an answer, just, KICKING THE RADIO DEMON IN THE SHIN, "You're a horrible man!! You call yourself a gentleman but you left my mama to raise a baby all by herself!! You're terrible! Incorrigible! Disrespectful! Untoward!--" Your young son is breaking out the goddamn dictionary and synonyms on this man, "you lying, deceitful, devious, DEPLORABLE--"

And Alastor is watching this little kid threaten to beat his ass and not even caring that he's up against The Infamous Radio Demon, just shouting at Alastor until the young boy is absolutely changing colors in the face, getting SO SO upset for his mama that he's ready to FIGHT OVER IT, and Alastor is just, essentially, breaking out into laughter, "oh, so you ARE my son!! Aren't you a gutsy one!! Put JUST a little force behind that next one and it might actually sting a bit!" and pats the boy on the head. That settles it; he's accepted as Alastor's son like THAT

Of course, Alastor now caring for this boy does not come without its... complications. There might be some 'incidents' if you, for example, have other positive role models for your son, other men who are regularly coming around, making Alastor's new position as the boy's father and your not-quite-husband (yet) feel threatened and unstable and encouraging the Radio Demon to 'act out'. You're so happy to have Alastor back in your life that you don't even notice things are a little off until your son starts mentioning things like "Mama where did Mr Thomas go? He used to come by every Thursday to play chess but I don't remember seeing him for a while?" "Mama I know Benson has bullied me and pushed me down and stolen my things but I saw his mom crying outside the bookstore earlier saying he's gone missing and I think we should help look for him" "Mama I know Mr Alastor said we don't need her and he can teach me but I also like my old piano teacher. Could I have some lessons with her and some with Mr Alastor instead of just all of them with him? I miss Ms. Mason"

But like... you don't want to deny Alastor a relationship with his child after they both have already lost so much time and you don't want to deprive your son of his father without a good reason, so you stifle some of your suspicions. It's all for your son's sake, isn't it? And you can't help but, get a little selfish when Alastor insists on taking you and your boy out, going to see live bands, going to local events, taking your son to the county fair and you feeling tears in your eyes as, your boy finally gets to spend time with his father. It's like... it's like you're a real family... you've always wanted something like this, for him, for them, for yourself--

But... Alastor doesn't... see you THAT way, does he? He displays his emotions much differently than you, and there were even times in the past where Alastor himself drew the line in the sand that, oh yes you two were quite close friends, he has such a deep affection for you, but... romantically? Sorry, sweetheart, but no

... or so he thought. Now that he's back, he sees how deeply you love his son and sacrifice so much for him amd how much your son absolutely adores you and how, completely by yourself, without any of Alastor's help, you raised him into a fine young man that... the Radio Demon could see himself helping raise, a boy he can't help but feel a little pride in helping make and, can't help but feel a little sad he missed all sorts of important milestones for. And of course, of course of course of course, he missed YOU ever so much, and when Alastor looks up from his paper to see you at the stove, hair all out of place and your hands messy as you cook a meal for your son and his father, your little boy dutifully helping clean as you go, he can't help wish that THIS was how he spent his last 7 years.

Lucifer have mercy on anyone who tries to disrupt his new utopia of peace and tranquility. Could you even imagine, could you even fucking imagine you and Alastor are walking with your son and nearby TVs snap on and it's fucking Vox, showing your family on TV, talking shit to Alastor, using HORRIBLE language in front of your son--

And Alastor feels his love for you grow all the more as you use your own magic to surge through the television and begin strangling the newscaster right on the air, "DONT YOU DARE SHOW MY SON'S FACE ON TV YOU FUCKING--" and Alastor starts lovingly conversing with his son about how important it is to stand up for your family and your values as the pair of them watch you throw Vox around his recording studio in a frenzied rage, "You and your disgusting Vees always trying to peddle your worthless garbage to kids, you CREEPS!! BABIES DON'T NEED IPADS, RETINOL CREAMS, SKEEYEE DANCE ROUTINES, AND ATHLEISUREWEAR LEGGINGS THAT GO UP THEIR ASS, YOU CONSUMERIST IMMORAL SHELL OF A HUMAN BEING--"

Snapcut to you rejoining your family on the sidewalk with your hair a mess and visible blood on you while Vox is facedown on the floor in his broadcast unable to move before it cuts to a "technical difficulties, please stand by" screen. Alastor is oh so genuinely joyfully smiling, "Now who wants to go and get some waffles? I say we should celebrate any victory over our enemies with some tasty grub!!" and he takes you and your son's hands and is all but skipping down the sidewalk while his hated rival is bleeding out in his tower somewhere. Oh, Alastor will give the Television Demon his own revenge for daring to try and shame the lovely beautiful mother of his child and his beloved boy on that disgusting show. What kind of degenerate uses children for content, let alone threatens their safety? Alastor will be back for him later and do much, MUCH worse than you did.

For now, though? Alastor just wants to enjoy the sight of you and his son sitting in a booth with him while you all scarf down some hotcakes. A family of his very own, huh? How wonderful. If only his own mom were here to see it...

[somedaytakethetime]

Hii, I hope you've been good. 🙂 Maybe I've finally recovered from the SerieA season by now, my sleeping schedule was fucked up for week because I kept watching stuff including this insanely long bus ride party. 😄 But I've never seen anything like it, people celebrating a football championship like that and I probably learned more about this club and what it means to Milan people in those few days than in all the months before! So in a way it was also good they didnt win like 2 years ago because no one would of been allowed to celebrate then. I also changed my mind about the trophy being ugly its actually pretty nice it looks like a giant golden martini glass and I'm almost sure Davide slept with it the night after they won it, he looked completely physically attracted to it. 😆😆 They all did tho and if they look likely to defend it next season I'll fly over and dress up as the trophy before it gets awarded.😊 Never thought I'd ever say this but maybe for once I'm grateful for my stupid deranged kink who got me into this mess, with your help. 😅

And just when I wondered what to do without the football stress the internationals started, I watched Italy vs Argentina but that wasnt fun. And I blame the italian manager, thats what you get for leaving all Milan players out of the squad! He ruined Chiellinis farewell match too and thats not nice. And now hes off to L.A., maybe I'll have to watch a bit more MLS now that so many Italians are joining! I also watched Portugal and then France v Denmark yesterday and that was alot more enjoyable even tho Simon still isnt playing but atleast he lopped the scary beard off and is looking so beautiful again! Both teams were playing well but I was so happy when Denmark won! How cool is the ginger striker? 🙂 Although I like Theo and would be okay with him winning but he also just won the italian championship so thats enough for a while. :D I didn't know he has a brother who looks almost like him and thought I was going crazy when I saw the two of them going on the pitch. 😅

And now Italy is playing again, I'm a bit worried but atleast there will be pretty players to look at. 😍 Hope your having a nice weekend! 🙂

~S.A.

Hello!! Welcome back!! I'm doing well, I hope you've been well too my love! Football is something else isn't it? One hell of a sport let me say... you laugh, you cry, you curse, you scream, and in the end you love these clubs all the same. The guys and the trophies are always hilarious to me because they look way into the cups, but bless I guess they work so hard and suffer so much for it that they deserve to make out with it a little. 😂 Dressing up as the trophy seems to be a recurring theme that we've all thought of.. when I see my favourite men kissing a tin cup I always feel jealous as hell of it which is ridiculous but also a vibe xD Isn't it nice to have off-the-beaten-path kinks now? See? Totally okay, what did I tell you? And also it got you into this mess with the rest of us and that's low-key a vibe I love for you 😌

I've had to miss Italy playing tonight because I was fighting my technologies but I need to peep on that tomorrow (it's past mid-night so it's already tomorrow but... you know xD) the only games I watched were my very own clowns because it's free on TV and then my Danish rolls! I was more than delighted with the match and the results but I don't know which striker is ginger? Kasper Dolberg? I always thought he was blonde but maybe he's red to some. 😅 I'm so damn happy Simon shaved off that bush off his face!! I am beyond relieved that his prince good looks are starting to come back, if he made me look at that beard for longer I would have lost the last of my nuts and bolts... Theo and his brother tend to scare me because they're not event twins... Lucas is older than Theo and yet I swear those dudes look the same to me... but at least Theo is a decent guy 😶

I hope you have a nice weekend too darling! And I hope your sleeping schedule continues to improve while football is out for while! 💗

[takuyakistall]

a game? | jade leech

summary: jade has had enough of this little game.

tags: slight angst, fem!reader

author's notes: guess who wrote a fucking self indulgent fic at 3AM?? Yup, that's me!! Your local takoyaki stall owner is sobbing over this man called jade and this is unedited I did not read this the second time so eirjejkdbfkdcbdjbrjh yolo

"Stupid." Jade felt his cheek sting from the impact of her slap. Why was she crying? Was it not her fault that they were walking on a tightrope, one wrong step and they'll meet their doom? He loved her, he loved her so much to the point that he can't stand being with her anymore. And yet, he hated her. He wanted to make her cry and scream as he immediately wipes her tears away and whisper sweet nothings to her. Why? Why is he feeling like this towards her? He feels like his heart is being squeezed every time he sees her with another man, smiling as she engulfs them in hugs and pepper their face with kisses. He shouldn't have any problem with this kind of thing, he knew that she really didn't love him and her loyalty never stayed in one place.

People called her unfaithful. Jade knew that and yet- he allowed himself to be captivated by her and her charms. He was a fool for her and he knew it, he would keep finding himself forgetting about her faults and come back to her- it was like Jade was on a leash. He could never break through- even if he tried his best. "I don't love her." He desperately tried to convince himself, coming up with dozens of excuses. The tears were threatening to fall from the corner of his eyes as he crouched down, desperately trying his best to keep his composed persona. Did she ever mean those sweet words she told him under the moonlight? Was it all just a ruse? What kind of sick joke is this? Let him go, please.

He thought it was time to put their relationship to an end, he thought it was now or never. If he didn't do it now, he could never manage to do it ever again. He wanted to break free from her web of lies and deceit, that's all that he could think about, not noticing the longing in her eyes everytime she looked at Jade. "Why won't you look at me…?"

No matter what she did, he wouldn't spare her a second glance. Why is it that he'll only look at her when she's being unfaithful? Why did he even accept her confession if he's just going to act as if nothing happened between them? It hurt. Does she have to continue acting like this just to grab his attention? It was childish of her- she knows. She knows that it's so childish of her to do this and yet she continues to keep up this dangerous act. Why is she forcing herself to do this? Can't she just leave him be and move on instead of hurting herself more? No, wanted to cling on to that hopeless relationship she has with him. When Jade called her and asked her to meet him in the Mostro Lounge, she was beyond ecstatic. Did it go through? Her smile turned into a frown, or is it over?

When Jade told her the words she didn't want to hear- "Let's put an end to this game." She slapped him. "Y-You stupid eel!" Tears were forming at the corner of her eyes, she was about to break down. Driven to madness by her own emotions, she failed to notice the slight crack in Jade's voice. An angel, that's what people used to call her. Because no matter what she did- she was beautiful and kind beyond words. Now, they called her a slut. Going out with different men and eventually just throwing them away in a matter of seconds. It didn't matter what her labels were now- she was herself and she was a sobbing mess.

Jade was pissed. Why was he the one to blame here? What right did she have to slap him? "Oh? So I'm the stupid one here? Who was it that cheats on me with different men for almost each day?" His calm persona was close to breaking- she was pushing him to his limits. He grabbed her wrists and pinned them against the wall above her head. "Stop playing with my heart, please." He was shedding tears, he hated how he was being so vulnerable right now. Right in front of her- no less.

"...what did you say?" She stopped struggling for freedom when she heard those words leave from his mouth. No… he couldn't possibly…? "Let go of me, Jade." She demanded, her voice shaky and her face still stained with fresh tears. Jade reluctantly loosened his grip on her wrists, wiping away his own tears. It was over, or so he thought. She tackled Jade into a bone crushing hug- knocking the both of them down on the Lounge's carpets. "I love you." She pulled him in for a passionate kiss, her eyes closed as she savoured the moment. Jade's eyes widened in surprise, but eventually melting into the surprise kiss. The words 'I love you.' not leaving from his mind. Did she really mean it? Was he willing to give her another chance? Perhaps.

She pulled away, breathless as she tried to cover her face with her hands, shyly admitting her wrongdoings. "I-I did it to get your attention." Jade was beyond surprised, a small smile took over his face as he slipped his hand beneath her chin and tilted it up. "What else did you do wrong?" There was still evidence of tears on his cheeks and she couldn't help but feel guilty- did he really feel that way? "I guess I never really talked to you about it and went ahead with my bullshit." She admitted, Jade grinned even wider. His butler-like persona was long gone and was replaced with his raw emotions. "So you didn't lie about the part when you said you loved me, am I correct?" She gulped, suddenly nervous from the sudden question but she steeled herself and looked at him directly in the eye. "I wasn't lying. I do love you." Jade's expression softened. Perhaps, he could give their relationship another chance.