#i dont actually know if hes the worst president in my opinion but i HATE him for being like

[prosk8r]

Andrew Jackson WORST president for a fucking million reasons but my personal bone to pick is stewardship theory

[totallypathet]

Episode Nine

Is it just me, or is anyone else less of a Jeff Goldblum fan after that show? Very bizarre. Speaking of bizarre, can we talk about Roople's wardrobe this season? Theres been a few looks I've absolutely hated, but that look he wore on the main stage was actually heinous. I mean honestly, what is he spending that fracking money on? Bc it ain't wardrobe, hair or makeup.

Let's chat quickly about the mini challenge as well. Remember when mini challenges were fun, light entertainment sketches instead of straight up advertisements? Greed ain't a good look Roop.

The main challenge this week was a really great concept. It worked well in season 4 (except for PhiPhi, but that's to be expected), it makes sense to bring it back for another election year. I also think it was a great choice to bring it back this year, it opens the door for really important political conversations - like the struggles of being LGBT+ in conservative states, being black or a POC in the US in general, being an immigrant... I'm so glad that the space was given for the queens (Widow and Jackie in particular) to have those conversations. However, I think there was too many queens to make that debate coherent. They didn't give it enough time, the editing was bizarre, and it was really tough to follow what was actually happening and who did well/didn't do well.

All that said, let's jump into the breakdown...

1. Crystal Methyd

Crystal makes me proud every week, and this week was no exception! She just jumps from strength to strength and I love her more and more each week! Her debate was pretty good, I love that she really leant into the drag aspect, and (obviously) her mullet, and she made me laugh! I enjoyed her. And her loooooook on the runway!! She was giving me lifeee, I just absolutely loved it! I didn't get what carson was saying about it being too much at all - it was very Alyssa Edwards, like it should be too much but it just works. The hat, with the blue hair, and her make-up, I loved all of it. Great night for Crystal!

2. Gigi Goode

Gigi suffered from the edit I think this week. I get that she was going for this robotic character, but she didn't really get the time to build, it was too fast paced. But also I definitely get what the judges were saying, she's clearly not very politically engaged, which is a shame. I think in these times we all have to be a little bit politically aware - I'm not saying you have to know every detail and get news alerts every 5 seconds, but you just have to know a bit, yknow? I'm not even American and I feel like I probably know US politics better than Gigi does.

Also, we've seen the robotic character before. Show us something new.

I didn't live for her runway either. It seemed like a less good version of her entrance look. It felt lazy somehow, and I just wonder if Widow had worn it would the judges have gagged over it so much? Or did it only work bc Gigi is a skinny white queen? I dont know. I think Gigi should have been lip syncing this week - but I guess the producers know they can't pit her against Widow because Widow would wipe the floor with her.

I feel like Gigi is coasting, and it's a shame. She's better than this. I wonder if maybe she might have needed another couple of years just to really solidify her star power.

3. Heidi N Closet

The thing that confused me most about Heidi this week was that in the work room she had that really great slogan "no more closets" that she was toting, then she didn't say it once in the challenge? I didn't get it. Regardless, I thought Heidi was great in the challenge! She looked the part, she gave me that conservative Southern Belle character with her (literal) pearl clutching, I enjoyed it. She looked like she was having fun, and that's my favourite thing on this show; when I watch a queen have fun, I have fun. Loved it.

Her look on the runway was cute, she did the assignment, she looked great. It wasn't particularly creative, but I enjoyed it. Really strong night for Heidi.

4. Jackie Cox

Jackie was so so so important this week. Of course, as Persian LGBT+ representation, she's always important, but this week really opened the door for her to delve deeper into her story, and talk about how important it is to be politically aware, how affected immigrant families are under Tr*mp's presidency, how affected Muslims are, the importance of voting, what the word "American" means... so so so important. I'm so glad she told her story, and I'm so proud of her for representing her heritage.

Having said that, she wasn't great in the debate. I thought the Canadian thing was funny, but it didn't develop, it just sort of flat lined. And it was a shame, because she fully looked the campaign trail part.

Her runway look was perfect. It was so powerful, and so beautiful, and it will have touched so many LGBT+ muslims around the world.

5. Jaida Essence Hall

Jaida was so good this week. I loved her character in the main challenge, it was so absurd that it was just hilarious! And she managed it being absurd and funny on the top layer, and underneath was this perfect satire and cynicism. And she was so quick! So witty! And she looked like she was having so much fun. I remember I said a few weeks ago that I felt a little bit disconnected from Jaida, but this week i felt like we were just seeing pure Jaida. She was just enjoying herself and I related to her so much. I was so happy watching her this week. She fully deserved her win.

However. I hated her runway. I dont know why! I just really hated it. Her hair and makeup was beautiful (of course!) but that outfit was just... I don't know, it confused me. Maybe that was the point, maybe it was an extension of her character in the challenge and I just didn't get that!

6. Widow Von Du

I'm so sad about Widow. I absolutely adore her, she was one of my absolute favourites from the beginning; watching her go right after Jan was so hard.

I do think she deserved to be in the bottom, which is kind of shitty because she didn't do a bad job at all! It's just that she wasn't that funny, and we all know that that's the trick to this show. She really looked the part, and she had some jokes, I just wonder if she was off rhythm because she was so tired. And then as soon as she got frustrated on the runway, we knew it was all she wrote. Which is also shitty! She was frustrated, and she had every right to be! It seemed like she couldn't do right in front of the judges. I felt like she was just airing her feelings and expressing her emotions. I don't know why the judges are so opposed to that on the main stage. Like it seems to be fine when they just demurely cry, but as soon as they have something to say about the critiques, no matter how valid it is, they get bashed for "not taking constructive feedback". I dont like that - she's upset, she should be allowed to be upset. If you dont like it that much, cut it out in the edit, but damn she's allowed to have feelings.

Also I loved her look this week. So powerful, so important, so beautiful.

I just hope she knows how incredible she is, and is able to recognise how great her work was throughout the show.

I do have a couple of other things to say about this episode (me? Have opinions? Unheard of!).

First of all, Jeff Goldblum was way out of line talking about Islam being homophobic/sexist. Jackie was making an important statement about how important representation is, and it was totally inappropriate to turn that into a religious debate. I do think it's so important to talk about LGBT+ rights and womens rights globally, but it's also really important to distinguish between culture and religion. And even more important to recognise the difference between governmental culture and social culture. It's an incredibly nuanced topic, and he clearly isn't well informed. To be honest though, even if he hadn't said it the way he said it; he shouldn't have been talking over her about issues that directly affect her. The whole thing was inappropriate. At worst, it was racist/islamophobic, at best it was tone deaf and misjudged.

Secondly, let's all just take a moment to think about how this episode dealt with politics, politically charged subjects and patriotism; and how interesting it is that the two queens who chose to represent black and Muslim empowerment were in the bottom two. Just something to think about.

[witchcraft-in-wonderland]

Highschool Au Moceit: Part One

-------------------------

Day One:

Patton wasnt the best with social etiquette, his smile was to wide, his eyes to shiny, people found him weird for being so happy. He wore dresses, to, lots of dresses, and he loved them. It didnt matter to him that none of his clothes quite fit like they should, or that his glasses were almost two sizes to big for his face, he liked it that way. He hoped the kids at his new school would like it to, he wanted to make friends quickly, friends made him even happier.

Patton put on a white long sleeved shirt and a light blue dress over it. He fixed a white bow in his hair and cleaned off his glasses before putting his shoes and backpack on and running out the door. His parents werent there to say goodbye, they were always busy. He didnt mind most days, it wasnt their fault they had to work after all!

He ran up to the bus stop and hopped onto the wall, swinging his legs back and forth as he waited.

"Hey, I dont think I've seen you around before, you new here?" Patton looked up. The person standing in front of him was tall, with short purple hair and a black hoodie.

"Yeah! My names Patton, he/him pronouns, you can call me Pat, nice to meet you!" Patton held his hand out for the kid.

"Virgil, he/him," said the boy, returning the hand shake awkwardly. Patton heard snickering from behind him.

"If you're a boy, why are you wearing a dress? Do your parents hate you or something?" said a snobbish voice. Patton felt his face flush, he shook it off.

"Mind your business Carol," said Virgil, shielding Patton from the view of the small group of people.

"Its ok, I'm used to it," Patton rubbed his arm and looked away slightly, Virgil sat down next to him.

"Being used to something doesnt make it ok, Pat," he said, pulling his hood over his head.

"You dont let people tell you what gender should define you, got that?" said the purple-haired boy. Patton simply nodded and smiled. He waited next to Virgil until the bus showed up, then hopped aboard and sat in the seat closest to the front. He watched the trees pass outside and drew hearts in the dew on the windows until they reached the school.

They reached the school after a few minutes of driving around to other stops. Patton skipped down the steps and was about to walk inside when he bumped into something tall and soft. He looked up to be faced with a pair of menacing eyes, one brown and one yellow.

"S-Sorry- didnt see you there," he said to the figure. They simply growled under their breath and walked in a different direction. Virgil got off the bus and grabbed Patton by the arm.

"That's Deceit, if you know what's good for you you wont talk to him, hes bad news," Virgil said. Patton stole one last glance at Deceit before walking into the school building. He didn't seem like a bad guy, But Patton supposed no one really did at first glance, after all, he'd only just gotten there.

He ran to homeroom and sat down in the seat closest to the teacher's desk. He ignored the snickers and murmurs behind him until the teacher walked into the room.

"Class, we have a new student today, he's going to introduce himself," she said, moving out of the way so Patton could stand up.

He fumbled around a bit trying to stand up on the table, and nearly fell off, which caused a snicker to ripple through the back of the room.

"Hi! My name's Patton Prescott! I use he/him pronouns, my favorite animal is cats, and my favorite food is cookies!" he smiled brightly, swaying from side to side a bit before getting back in his seat.

"Well, welcome to class Patton," said the teacher. Patton grinned, causing his eyes to close slightly. They waited in homeroom until the bell rang. He ran out of the class and upstairs to the science lab. It seemed as though most of the seats were taken in the front, so he decided to sit in the back.

"You're in my spot," said a voice, in what sounded like a low hiss.

Patton froze and turned around, only to come face to face with Deceit. He let out a small squeak before gathering up his own things and running off to another desk. He noticed Deceit watching him from the corner of his eye and buried his head into a book, hoping it could block his face enough.

"Hey girl, are you from Tennessee, because you're the only ten I see," said a voice from in front of Patton. He heard a groan from the other side of the room.

"Noooo- last time I checked I'm a boy from Florida," Patton watched as the expression on the face of the kid in front of him changed from one of smug flirtation, to mortified panic.

"What kind of guy wears bows and a dress! You look stupid!" he said angrily.

"The only stupid one here is you, he can wear what he wants, it's none of your business why," said the menacing voice of Deceit from across the room. The boy stormed back to his seat and Patton buried his face in his arms.

He waited out the rest of the class without speaking or looking at anyone before running through the hallway at top speed to escape the stares. He felt someone grab onto his shoulder and whipped around to face them. It was Deceit, he looked upset.

"I wanted to make sure you were ok, I know that cant be a fun experience for you," he said.

"Its fine, I'm used to it," Patton mumbled, shuffling his feet.

"Society just cant handle people having different tastes can they," Deceit's vibrant eyes seemed to stare into his soul. He shuffled his feet again and ran a hand over the back of his neck.

"Yeah, but they dont mean anything by it! People make bad choices some times," Patton said, his smile faltered slightly.

Deceit smirked slightly "you'll have to change that opinion eventually, optimism like that might get you hurt one of these days," he said. He ruffled Patton's hair slightly and continued down the hall. Patton frowned.

"Patton! Are you ok? What'd he do to you?" Virgil skidded to a halt next to him.

"I'm fine, he was just checking on me, someone mistook me for a girl in class today," Patton said. Virgil's eyes seemed to blaze with fire.

"People sometimes, it's like they think pronouns are a joke," he snarled.

"It really wasnt that big of a deal," Patton said. He was beginning to get tired of the subject. He and Virgil walked to their next class, talking about what they'd learned.

They'd gotten separated somewhere along the way to the gym, but Patton found him again once they reached the actual gymnasium.

"Gods I hate gym class, dodgeball has got to be the worst thing society has ever come up with," Virgil said. He'd gotten benched within the first few minutes of playing, he didnt seem upset about that fact though. Patton couldnt focus completely on him as he was trying to dodge a few blows from a boy with black sunglasses.

He was knocked back by a sudden blow to the chest, and landed with a thud on the gymnasium floor.

"Point Remus! Told you I could beat you!" said a boy with brown hair and a poorly drawn mustache on his face.

"Remus! You could've seriously hurt someone!" another boy who looked like the first, with redder hair and no drawn-on mustache, held his hand out to help Patton up and guided him over to Virgil.

"You did good!" Virgil said, nudging him in the arm.

"Yeah- wasnt expecting that though," Patton giggled.

"Remus is a bit of a wild card on most days, not his fault though, hes related to a class president, gotta make a name for himself somehow," Virgil said, pointing between the twins.

By the end of the day, Patton had solidified himself friendships with Virgil and the Prince twins. He was glad, the three of them were. nice. Even if Remus was a bit off putting at times, but he guessed that wasnt his fault. He felt like he was going to like it here, and he was happy with that.

----------------------------------------------

Tag List:

@oceanart123

@youtuberswithalex

@misunderstoodshadowling

@hayden-going-insane

@imbasicallyshakespear

@spooky-scary-virgil

@id-rather-go-live-in-a-trash-can

@sidesgeek

@the-emo-nightmare-bean

[sometimesrosy]

ohhh i know, and these so called "fans" that sent u these nasty mesgs are repulsive. i am sorry u ever received that u dont deserve it ! the fandom is not great i know, its very toxic sometimes too. they jump to conclusions, they assume the worst out of JR (i am not his biggest fan tbh but i am not gonna deny he wrote one hell of a good story and good dynamics) and they are never satisfied when they're given what they asked for, so i totally get u being done with them. its valid !

thanks.

i don’t deserve it... but then nobody deserves it. 

i mean, if you like me, you feel like they’re wrong in sending that stuff, which is great and also true.

but like, if you didn’t like me or you didn’t agree with me, or didn’t follow me, or whatever, I STILL wouldn’t deserve it.

I think that’s how it happens, actually. People think they and their krus are deserving of respect and kindness and being defended and their opinion and their ships etc... but those people over THERE, they are wrong or [insert slur] so therefore DON’T deserve human respect, and DO deserve to be harassed.

A HUGE percentage of fandom thinks nasty or demanding or rude comments on JR’s twitter is deserved. For whatever reason. Like you say you’re not his biggest fan. A lot of people are angry at him. And they interpret their anger as just, and him as some version of evil. Therefore he’s deserving.

I don’t know, I’m trying to reconcile my distaste for internet harassment with this time of upheaval and people being DONE with racism, transphobia, misogyny etc and I saw three trends on twitter this morning.

One against Ivanka Trump. One against JKRowling. and one against Hillary Clinton. Ivanka is trying to portray herself as Princess Leia and twitter calls her out on her hypocrisy. JKR said some transphobic things and twitter calls her out for various unsavory concepts in her books. And twitter tells Hillary to stfu for...to be honest I haven’t seen why. I think it’s the berniebros who hate her and I think it’s mostly because she’s female and beat bernie. Just mean chuckling and quite a few lies about Hillary, just her existence.

Three privileged white women being targeted for internet hate. I’m sure they all have protections against harassment, between wealth and the secret service. But. And those three people are, for me, on that spectrum of hate/like. I hate ivanka and think it’s laughable she’s trying to portray herself as princess leia when she’s just her dad/darth vader’s little mini me dressed up in a white suit and blonde hair. And i like some of what JKR has done and some of it I dislike a lot. And I’m pro Hillary and am disgusted with the misogyny of this country and how it ripped her apart and left us with this evil cartoon villain for president. 

But it was A LOT of woman hate first thing in the morning. It was a lot to take in and left me feeling rather sick. Even if it felt righteous to me when it was about Ivanka, and I had to agree with the JKR terf stuff. 

It felt like the same kind of violence. It felt like violence. Even if it was just twitter. 

I didn’t post those nasty anons because I wanted attention or wanted people to feel bad for me. It wasn’t about me. It’s about US, and who we are and what kind of thing we think is okay-- even if only done to someone we don’t like. 

And I’m trying to reconcile that within myself. That the, actually funny to me, stuff towards Ivanka, who I think is part of the evil empire, is the same kind of stuff that is leveled at Hilary, who won the popular vote even WITH the media against her AND voter fraud, but is still being called more unpopular than Bernie, even though she beat bernie by a HUGE margin.

i don’t have any answers here. it’s just something i’ve been thinking about.

[fizzingwizard]

I don’t talk about politics with my dad. But I’m very unhappy with how the Tara Reade situation has been going down with Democrats, and he posted something about that. I figured this was something we’d actually agree on, given that he hates all Democrats, and I at least hate how they’re dealing with Tara Reade.

Instead he appears to not even have read what I wrote, which was purely about Biden and Reade and didn’t say a single bad word about Trump, and instead starting ranting about how Trump Is The Best and Obama Is a Traitor and told me I am Eating The Fake News. I asked him which part of what I wrote was fake news. He started talking more about Flynn - who didn’t mention! How can Flynn be the fake news in my post when he’s not even present?!?!

Since December, I’ve deliberately ignored everything my dad’s been posting about politics, including stuff about Flynn and Obama, which even if the whole world agreed about, he still wouldn’t be able to discuss rationally. I only commented on the completely unrelated article about Tara Reade, because it was an article singling out women for being silent. So I, as a woman, said “guess I won’t be silent!” and responded. My reward for that was 1) my posts not being actually read 2) my opinions being assumed based on my dad’s idea of my politics, despite the fact that we DONT. TALK. about it, 3) me having to read unrelated tangents about what my dad currently wants to talk about rather than what the article he posted was about, 4) him ignoring me saying clearly I don’t want to talk about Flynn, anf 5) him ignoring me when I said I was leaving and continuing to rant.

And my mom? Will most likely defend him. It’s my fault for thinking we could have a conversation about any socio-political issues that affects us both (that I really thought we must freaking agree on! what!) without getting into a fight. My whole life has been about not setting my dad off. We know it’s not ok that he goes off like this, and yet someone it’s always someone else’s fault. “You should have known better, how long have you known your dad?”

I have so so SO many memories of sitting at the dinner table silently because my dad wants to talk about politics and the rest of us don’t agree with him but if we say anything it will be A Thing.

He got better for a while. I think the reason was, my brother is not like me and mom. He doesn’t bite his tongue as well. The result was DINNER TABLE EXPLOSIONS!!!! every fucking night. Because they were so annoying and we women demanded a politics-free household as a result, he did start to curb it. What those fights taught me was to bite my tongue harder. But after doing that for a long time, I am starting to think that as EXASPERATING as those dinner table fights were, they were better than not fighting at all, because as soon as he got comfortable, my dad’s started right back up. He’s especially loud about it on Facebook. But even though he is constantly plugging articles from every far right and even conspiracy theory website he can find, I am not sure he actually reads them!! Because he won’t read my post even when it’s specially designed to avoid everything that seems to offend him! And he won’t admit to not reading it!

He’s not a bad person. He just Cannot Even with anyone who has slightly different opinions than him. Which, to be fair to him, is literally everyone he knows except for his best friend. He’s made a couple Facebook friends and reconnected with some guys he used to know who share his politics, but they are people on the outskirts of his circle. Everyone inside hates Trump. It’s hard to be the minority... how ironic is that.

In 2016, he said he didn’t even like Trump. He said he thought he wasn’t that smart and couldn’t talk well. Even after Trump became the official R nominee, he continued to say that. Even after Trump won, he said the reason he was happy was because it meant Hilary was out of the picture. (He HAAAATED Hilary. I mean, I get it, HER EMAILS. He didn’t seem to just think she shouldn’t be president, he was very vocal about HAAAATING her.) Then all of a sudden, Trump became a good president, then the “best president of my lifetime,” then “probably the best president ever!”

I used to respond when he posted stuff on Facebook. Not all the time, but now and then. I never scoffed or told him he was stupid and I never talked about how I hate Trump, even though he wastes no time telling me how he hates people I like. I only ever commented on posts where his information was provably incorrect, in which case I said “this is inaccurate/outdated,” and linked to a reference. Thinking about it, he often responded with an unrelated rant back then too. I stopped doing it because of that sort of response and I went home last winter for the holidays, so for peace’s sake we all decided not to talk about politics at all. I still overheard some when my dad was talking with his best friend but. That’s host’s privilege I guess.

I kept up ignoring it literally until just now and this is the result.

It really REALLY bugs me that 1) I should have seen this coming but actually I didn’t, 2) my dad feels comfortable just assuming my opinions rather than bothering to find out what they are, 3) literally everyone will say this is my fault for opening the can of worms, because after all, my dad’s gonna post politics no matter what happens, I shouldn’t be provoked by it! Even though he’s the one who posted something provocative! AND I WASN’T EVEN PROVOKED. I THOUGHT WE AGREED ON TARA READE. That’s why I commented for fuck’s sake. The reason is, I don’t get fucking bent out of shape when someone disagrees with me. I can have a conversation like a normal human being. My dad can only rant.

The worst part is that the Democrats fucking suck too. I hate Trump but I don’t like being forced to defend Democrats! I don’t like who I don’t like regardless of party! Rrrgh!

[mars-the-4th-planet]

Renn? Never heard of that cryptid.

You sit your butt down on the uncomfortable wooden chair at the long table in the poorly lit room. You stare miserably at the faintly glowing slide in front of you. The stone brick walls are slightly moist and the only noise is the buzz of a small fan.

You were late, everyone else is already here. Including the Inquistitor. They are examining the slideboard to ensure everything was set.

"Excellent... Excellent. Now that you are all here, it is time to discuss our new findings on Renn. I know our picture is incomplete and blurry, but this is all we have to work with."

"What picture?" The Whisperer asked next to you.

"Figurative picture, good sir." The Inquistitor said.

The Whisperer was back on his phone, insulting the Traveler and calling him names.

"Can we move this along?" You think. After all, this is an important meeting.

"Now everyone, look at this. It may disturb you."

The Inquistitor turned on the first slide. And there was Renn, seen from behind.

"Looks normal right?"

Second slide.

Renns head had seemingly turned 180 degrees to face the camera with the rest of her body being the same. Her neck didnt seem to be straining at all, somehow.

Well, you knew how. But everyone else seemed shocked. The Whisperer in particular looked scared.

"Fascinating... Its almost as if her face is able to move around her head." The Emperor said, sitting back in his chair. He put his leg up on the table, and then crossed the other over it to seem casual. Then somehow crossed a third leg over that one. It was very casual looking but also strange. The Emperor was a strange man.

"Stop that." You say as you move your leg back off of his. You were a little annoyed that he grabbed your leg and put it on his.

"People, PLEASE! This is not over and we have a lot to get through." The Inquistitor said, showing the next slide. It was the Ask Sayori Blog.

"Oh I know about that." The Whisperer said. He had many good memories teasing his 'friend' for being unable to help, that you knew.

"We must understand the message of the blog, what it represents and what it means. I trust you have all gone through it. Any ideas, Renn enthusiasts?"

"I am more of a Renn critic." You say. "But I have an idea that it is about the miserable state of Renn and the world around her. A 'vent' blog I guess you guys would call it."

"I thought it was about healing and Renn wanting help with her problems?" the Whisperer said. At least that is what the Traveler always told him.

"That cannot be it," The Emperor chimed in. "everything always seems to go wrong no matter what and the author herself seems to think everything is hopeless. I like her (gesturing towards you) idea, that it is a vent blog. It is about the authors problems my research has shown. You are right about that."

"No, no no. You are all wrong." The President said. "This is a GIRL we are talking about. The blog has no intellectual, good, beautiful meaning. It is only a girl making cutsey drawings and nothing more. Any- no, dont interuppt me- meaning it does have is purely propaganda fake news made by the democrats who are funding it."

The Inquistitor pressed x to doubt with the last theory, but that did remind them of something. "Speaking of which, one factor we have yet to consider is this image we found."

The next slide appeared. On it was Yuri Gagarin.

"I knew it. The Democrat party has rigged the whole thing. Open your eyes America!" the President said.

"Oh! No that is actually fan art." You correct him. "It has nothing to do with renn other than that someone who liked Renn thought this was a good idea. And personally I think it is funny!"

"Whoever made that is definitely getting detained if they live in beautiful Japan." The Emperor said.

The Whisperer took this as an opportunity to bash someone. "The Traveler could never make something like that, he is too scaredy-cat."

The Inquistitor had more to say about it.

"In my opinion, it is ridiculous to think this ties Renn to communism... Allow me to explain. Not only can Renn draw better than this, but she is too depressed to care about the peoples revolution... Socialism of any kind can only be supported if you think people can get along and share their resources and power nicely. Renn hates people, and she more than anyone would know that it will never really work. Whoever controlled the economy would rule in favor of themselves, always. Not for everyone."

You nod. "They would abuse their power, anyone in any position of power would if they could gain from it. I know that and so does Renn. People are selfish."

The Emperor and the President, both being men in positions of power, looked offended. The President even muttered "Stupid millennial." in a voice just loud enough for everyone to hear.

The next slide popped up.

"As you can see here, as depressed as Renn is she does have her happy moments."

"Here she is on her positivity blog."

"Here she is making funny ask sayori posts."

"Here she is having fun with her friends."

"Here she is writing poems."

"Here she is looking at things her fans made for her."

"Wow, she does seem happy sometimes..." You say hesitantly. "But at the end of the day it doesnt matter, she will never be loved or anything."

"Are you sure?" Asked the Emperor. "Research shows that she is in fact loved. That is a good sign that someday somebody will love her whom she loves back."

"I doubt it. She will go through her life sad and alone."

"In an absolute worst case scenario maybe."

"That is all that happens! Did you learn NOTHING from the ask blog?"

"ENOUGH!" Said the Inquistitor. "You look awfully cute in your Renn mask... But who are you, really? Take it off!"

You take off your Renn mask, revealing your Renn face.

The End.

[wildfangz]

@liliithvatore tagged me in that simself thing thats been goin around DAYS ago but here it finally is! also thank you for the tag this was fun :-]

I tag @slythersim @thelurgoyf @seoulchii @weicyn @solitasims @daisydezem @raha-plays-the-sims if they want to do it & anyone that just wants to do it in general! message me and I’ll even @ u directly if u want. 

anyway lets DO THIS shitload of questions under the cut u’ve been warned!!!

1. what is your name?

julian

2. what is your nickname?

jewel, jules

3. birthday?

oct 26th

4. what is your favorite book series?

percy jackson and the olympians will probably always own my heart & soul

5. do you believe in aliens or ghosts?

yes & yes. tho i do think a lot of alien sightings and conspiracy theories and what not are bullshit

6. who is your favorite author?

maggie stiefvater probably? also cornelia funke but its been years since ive read anything by her so i cant be sure BUT i loved inkheart & the thief lord so much

7. what is your favorite radio station?

ummm when i listen to the radio at all i kinda just switch between two rock stations and our popular music station.

8. what is your favorite flavor of anything?

blue raspberry !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tasty and i love a blue tongue

9. what word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful?

cool. or bitchin’.  i play it simple

10. what is your current favorite song?

hands like houses - revive

11. what is your favorite word?

roulette and inhibition which i never get to use either as much as i want !

12. what was the last song you listened to?

emarosa - givin’ up ! its a bop!

13. what tv show would you recommend for everybody to watch?

the new she-ra on netflix its so good. and gay

14. what is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?

moana. its also like the only movie i dont have trouble getting thru despite how many times ive already seen it

15. do you play video games?

16. what is your biggest fear?

idk... being inherently unlovable i guess n ending up alone? also spiders !

17. what is your best quality, in your opinion?

im fairly open-minded and laid back. Unless someones being like, purposely nasty or something I generally don’t get defensive or aggressive. also a lot of little quirks that piss others off dont bother me im very u do u as long as its not actually harming anyone and ive had people tell me this makes it easier to open up to me so thats probably my best quality....

18. what is your worst quality, in your opinion?

....at the same time though i do get very sensitive when faced w/ criticism even if its of the fair variety when its not phrased really gently for various reasons and i dont like that. especially since I have a tendency to not even talk to people about it. I’ll just immediately start distancing myself. also other than that i think overall I have a really high tolerance lvl but if you cross that line I hold a grudge like a motherfucker

9. do you like cats or dogs better?

cats! dogs are good too but cats are a lot easier for me to handle...and quieter generally but even when they’re loud cat sounds dont get to me quite as much as barks do

20. what is your favorite season?

autumn but im starting to really like summer for some reason? wack :/

21. are you in a relationship?

nope

22. what is something you miss from your childhood?

the lack of responsibility, probably. that sounds real bad lmao but for me its like...I know I’ve grown in various ways over the years but I also feel like so many of my experiences, my trauma, my mental health has held me back and I don’t think I’m mentally where I should be for my age. so all the responsibility of adulthood is just..really overwhelming for me sometimes, even though ive been given a pass from certain aspects of it and the rest is pretty simple its the idea!!!!

23. who is your best friend?

my ex

24. what is your eye color?

25. what is your hair color?

26. who is someone you love?

my mom

27. who is someone you trust?

not really anyone rn unfortunately...would like 2 work on that

28. who is someone you think about often?

are my OCs a fair answer because i am always thinking about my babies.....

29. are you currently excited about/for something?

my favorite webcomic (that also has two of my all time favorite characters in it) just came back!! the artist disappeared back in 2015 like the day after I binge-read the whole fucking thing & i was so disappointed but its BACK and 2018 has been redeemed

30. what is your biggest obsession?

sims probably! i could talk about anything relating to it for hours

31. what was your favorite tv show as a child?

there were so damn many its hard to even think and figure out the most notable ones...i really, really liked teen titans though?

32. who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone?

my ex, again

33. are you superstitious?

not terribly so but somewhat. I take certain things as signs and I mean I do believe in astrology & such to a degree

34. do you have any unusual phobias?

i used to be afraid of mirrors but thats all i can think of and its not even a thing anymore...the only other thing is tornadoes but i dont think its unusual. but it definitely sucks for me ‘cause i live in tornado alley!

35. do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?

behind it....like taking pretty pictures and dont like ppl capturing my image 2 film

36. what is your favorite hobby?

sims.....also singing!!! and drawing!!!! video editing!!!!!!!!! the works

37. what was the last book you read?

The Dream Thieves....havent finished it though because last time i went to read it a spider was lying in wait and im traumatized

38. what was the last movie you watched?

coco i think???

39. what musical instruments do you play, if any?

drums, various other percussion instruments, and violin mainly

40. what is your favorite animal?

ferrets!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

41. what are your top 5 favorite tumblr blogs that you follow?

uhhhhh @bratsims @liliithvatore @cabsim @wildlyminiaturesandwich @keysims pls dont feel bad if i didnt include u these were just the first to pop into my head and ive been following some of them since I first made my blog!! and have kept up with their stories completely and enjoy them etc check them OUT !

42. what superpower do you wish you had?

shapeshifting!!! dysphoria? gone. ugliness? gone. want to morph into a fucked up clown and scare people when they realize all the classic clown features are a real actual part of my face? possible!

43. when and where do you feel most at peace?

chillin’ at the pool in summer during the part of the day when no ones there.... swimming is always relaxing 2 me then i love just resting under the sun and drying off afterwards especially since we have a little pond nearby and i can hear the water! its nice

44. what makes you smile?

always and without fail? interacting with anyone i have a crush on. i’ll look like a dope the whole time

45. what sports do you play, if any?

i used 2 play basketball a lot. Like not seriously but it was a thing

46. what is your favorite drink?

dr pepper and monster energy (original flavor) pumps through my veins at this point. we love a carbonated beverage

47. when was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody?

two years ago for my ex and I’s first year anniversary... I never got it mailed but I did at least take a picture of it (with included caption because my handwriting is atrocious). i was very up front about being a romantic and see heres the PROOF

48. are you afraid of heights?

nope! very excited by them actually

49. what is your biggest pet peeve?

i cant stand passive aggressive behavior. my stance is either get over it or quit acting like a bitch because otherwise im just going to ignore you thats the scorpio way (in all seriousness I really, really do recommend not putting up with it and ignoring it until they decide to be up front with you. it can be exhausting constantly reading into conversations and its not healthy for you or them. if they have something to say they need to learn to talk about it properly, and that lack of social skills is not ever on you)

50. have you ever been to a concert?

yep! i think about....six or so? i love them...which is really funny im autistic and EVERYTHING about them should freak me out and they do in other circumstances but at a show i just live for it

51. are you vegan/vegetarian?

nope! ive thought before id like to go vegetarian...but i couldnt do it with my health problems. also i love shrimp too much

52. when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

ive always wanted to do something creative! when i was rlly young I thought a lot about singing and acting and writing in particular...all things im still interested in.... also i wanted to be a dictator ages 4-7 because i told my mom i wanted to be president of the world and make people do what i say and she said “honey thats a dictator not a president”. i then made that known at school and that turned into a situation!

53. what fictional world would you like to live in?

pokemon universe or bust. 

54. what is something you worry about?

never being able to do things i want to do or catching up with others because of my disabilities

55. are you scared of the dark?

yes but a reasonable amount i think

56. do you like to sing?

yes :]

57. have you ever skipped school?

yes i used to play sick a LOT and as my parents caught onto it id even go all out to convince them. i was good at school but i hated it so much

58. what is your favorite place on the planet?

dunno! malls maybe i love shopping and looking at material objects i wish to own

59. where would you like to live?

oregon! portland in particular thats been my dream for a few years now

60. do you have any pets?

a cat! he lives with my dad & grandma though...hes grown up there and likes going outside so I felt bad about taking him with me when i moved out but anyway this is him hes fat and stupid and i love him his name is coffee

61. are you more of an early bird or a night owl?

night owl because my rhythm is all fucked up but in my heart....an early bird...if i get a good nights sleep i’ll be up early yacking your ear off and so excited for the day

62. do you like sunrises or sunsets better?

sunsets are prettier...but sunrises feel more refreshing

63. do you know how to drive?

nope ! im gay !

64. do you prefer earbuds or headphones?

headphones. better sound quality also discourages people from talking to me slightly more

65. have you ever had braces?

nope! but i need them

66. what is your favorite genre of music?

post-hardcore maybe?

67. who is your hero?

every trans person living their truth and being open and loud about who they are past present & future. the worlds not particularly kind to us and our existence alone is considered a radical act, so its always given me hope to see others refusing to pretend to be someone they’re not in this environment and I’ll always have mad respect for that

68. do you read comic books?

i read manga and webcomics...ive always wanted to get into superhero comics but the amount of issues and different versions is ridiculous and makes it inaccessible 2 me 

69. what makes you the most angry?

i mean its hard to pinpoint what makes me angry the MOST...but a contender is definitely how some people feel free to treat others with cruelty and think its their god given right to deny or attack someones existence in some way, & how acts of kindness, even the most basic are branded as liberal bullshit or whatever....it goes against everything i was taught growing up

70. do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book?

real book! electronic device can be easier but....rough on the eyes after a while and nothing beats the real thing for me

71. what was your favorite subject in school?

language arts...at least when we did creative writing stuff

72. do you have any siblings?

two older sisters & an older brother that passed away years ago but. still my brother u kno

73. what was the last thing you bought?

mocha frappe baby!!!!!

74. how tall are you?

5′4″

75. can you cook?

a little bit....not as much as id like to though but im learning

76. what are three things that you love?

storms, cheesy breadsticks, and cat purrs

77. what are three things that you hate?

unnecessary rudeness, being talked down to or generally treated like im stupid, grapefruit which is the worst thing on this list

78. do you have more female friends or more male friends?

female i think?

79. what is your sexual orientation?

im the big bad promiscuous bisexual your parents warned you about

80. where do you currently live?

oklahoma. gofundme campaign to get me out

81. who was the last person you texted?

my friend jojo! just Now!

82. when was the last time you cried?

yesterday afternoon but im a changed man now thats behind me. i will cry about different things soon

83. who is your favorite youtuber?

the mcelroy brothers. also super best friends play. matt, pat & woolie are all great tbh

84. do you like to take selfies?

depends on whether i feel ugly or terribly dysphoric that day or not

85. what is your favorite app?

ummmm....love live school idol festival ive been playin for years its an addiction

86. what is your relationship with your parent(s) like?

dad = bad mom = okay. theres some issues that strain it but its not too bad

87. what is your favorite foreign accent?

i have no idea what the fuck australians are talking about half the time but i dig it anyway 

88. what is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit?

Italy, Greece, Germany, Japan, Mexico, various other states (ive only been out of state three times. twice to texas and then once to kansas. for five minutes)

89. what is your favorite number?

6!! 26 also

90. can you juggle?

ive always wanted to but alas.... :-[

91. are you religious?

i suppose...but im rlly not into organized religion

92. do you find outer space of the deep ocean to be more interesting?

space probably theres so fucking much of it man!

93. do you consider yourself to be a daredevil?

not to brag but sometimes i eat my mcdonalds hamburgers cold from the fridge so you can figure that one out yourself B)

94. are you allergic to anything?

pecans. not deathly allergic though so catch me eating turtle pie anyway! 

95. can you curl your tongue?

nope :[

96. can you wiggle your ears?

nope :[

97. how often do you admit that you were wrong about something?

usually as soon as i realize....unless someones being real smug and annoying then i might be stubborn about it

98. do you prefer the forest or the beach?

ive never been to the beach but i love her!!!

99. what is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?

probably that you have to look at your accomplishments differently when you’re disabled or just struggling, to not be so down on yourself because its a fact that what might be a mole hill to someone else is a mountain to you and you have to judge yourself accordingly. Like maybe you weren’t able to clean the whole house, but washing the dishes and tidying your desk doesn’t usually get done but you did it. That that should be celebrated because while it would also feel good if you did more, you still did something and thats great all things considered.

100. are you a good liar?

sometimes, really depends what im lying about and if im like....into it at all. If my guts against it for whatever reason I’ll have trouble

101. what is your hogwarts house?

i always get slytherin or hufflepuff! usually with like 1 point difference

102. do you talk to yourself?

i am talking to myself right now as i fill this out

103. are you an introvert or an extrovert?

extrovert mainly! i used to think i was more introverted but now i think a lot of exhaustion when theres any comes from me just going the extra mile and actively trying to read people and pick up on social ques.... if I just chill im fine

104. do you keep a journal/diary?

nope...ive tried but i just cant keep up with it so i do the next best thing. shouting into the void on the internet to a bunch of strangers

105. do you believe in second chances?

depends on what you did the first time. Some people just don’t deserve taking that risk imo...but i can be a little guarded so maybe thats a bit too harsh

106. if you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?

turn it in, unless there was no identifying things in it & it was found somewhere kinda random. Then I’d maybe hold onto it unless my gut challenged that

107. do you believe that people are capable of change?

absolutely. i mean thats all we do throughout our lives is change and evolve...that being said I think extremely drastic changes are maybe not entirely impossible, but extremely rare, and the residue of the former self usually sticks around in some form

108. are you ticklish?

yes, dangerously so

109. have you ever been on a plane?

nope

110. do you have any piercings?

one day hopefully!

111. what fictional character do you wish was real?

asra from the arcana.....even if he wasn’t my boyfriend thats just a dude u could chill and eat some pomegranates with u know. Before I downloaded the app my friends kept telling me he was made for me and he really was he ticks like everything on my Favorite Characters Feature List except villain but he has that particular allure & attitude i like so much in villains so thats not a single point off hes perfect

112. do you have any tattoos?

nope...one day! hopefully!

113. what is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far?

accepting my genderqueerness and bisexuality definitely. Self Love hasn’t been perfected just yet but that was such a huge step in the right direction

114. do you believe in karma?

yes! she doesn’t get shit done as much as id like however

115. do you wear glasses or contacts?

glasses. not contacts yet because my eye doctor is a bitch

116. do you want children?

I do....just not sure if id be a good parent. Its really important to me if I had a child itd be for the right reason and I could raise them well in a healthy environment & be able to take care of all their needs yknow

117. who is the smartest person you know?

probably my friend jojo

118. what is your most embarrassing memory?

one time i looked outside and the sunset was really pretty and i wanted to get a photo of it so i walked out.....and stood like right by the street so there weren’t trees in my way...and then i realized mid-pic 1) i am not wearing pants & my shirt is full of holes 2) id been depressed for days so my hair was a tangled mess. I tailed it back inside so i didnt even get a nice pic it was blurry!

119. have you ever pulled an all-nighter?

120. what colour are most of you clothes?

black i didnt even have to think about that one

121. do you like adventures?

they are pretty swell

122. have you ever been on tv?

a few times when i was little. always photobombing the news reporters 4 what i thought would eventually lead 2 fame & fortune

123. how old are you?

21

124. what is your favorite movie quote?

this is technically lyrics to that lil song in moana at the end but

“ They have stolen the heart from inside you. But this does not define you.”

hits me hard every time! emotional impact? i know her

125. sweet or savory?

sweet!!!!!!!! gotta balance out my bitter somehow

[castlehead]

makeshift feels from the opinion lab

kafka wrote in a journal urhmherm of being limited to prague, then his room, then his bed, then nothing at all. to be limited at last to nothing at all. well. turns out i guess the most kafkaesque sentiment came from franz kafka.

enjoi ya rickety gethsemane while it is still to be dreamed, young writers, young writers of youth.

after a job on a hot day back in april or may or something i started listening to this while walking out of the truck towards the gas station convenience store and abruptly pivoted away from the sliding doors to sneak around the side and weep near the green fencing around some boilers. it occurred to me how little i could ever forgive myself for doing.

the shit ive done, all of it, i havent forgiven myself. if i did it and it was bad, or even meagre, dumb, really no big deal, bet yr ass it still keeps me from thinking i deserve happiness. i do not forgive myself for anything ive ever done. no deed is too temporal to etch itself cleanly into my head as something unforgivable, if only it makes a small point.

i know this is true because no joy i ever feel is felt fully, because i do not think it is deserved; and because i allow myself to be joyous only when i think of the truth of my unforgiven, unforgivable state. never to be. Never will.

and that is what is depression.

There must be something here, in me. Here where the jackals caterwAul Like streetcats Mewing their gizzard After this night’s heat, What’ll it be Jackals, Buzz off, shit man

i feel like the key to life is knowing that 90 percent of anxiety & depression, either in degree or in its truth, and at least somewhere not wracked by war, is unsubstantiated (the ten percent being actual crises, like fear of violence, a death in the family, etc). The problem is how persuasive these feelings can be that lead to the fulfillment of the very fear or solidifying the reason for being depressed. But with positive feelings, the least thing, whether true or no, can always be rewarding. A bit of happiness must be allowed to be felt, indiscriminately, because it is more useful to us than a bit of sadness. Take the fierce dialectic u use to establish a depressing ‘truth’ and persuade yourself of something good. If one is far fetched, let it be the something bad. Until it happens, after all, all of it remains in your head, to do with what u will.

You don’t get to lower taxes on the rich and gut social services at the same time. The reason social services are in place is to provide a fair shake for john q public. Mostly investors are feeling the benefits of the corporate tax cut. They’re not giving the money towards a better product that would help the people. but one day there will be no sesame seeds on the bun of yr Big Mac and you’ll wonder how that’s possible with an entire sesame seed dept that just got a pay raise.

tax reform should be done to help a free market, so that the rich can be poor and the poor rich. Taxation helps the people so that social services become less necessary. Social services were developed because the percentage of taxation was unequal between higher and lower class. Poor folks felt the pain while rich folks shrugged it off.

Thats why I say you can’t do both: social services are a protection against the world being entirely controlled, if it’s not already, by those from the very swamp this president wants to drain. T**** hasn’t drained shit.

i feel like writing takes over for your thought process. You can’t think and write at the same time, or something. something turns off or it switches where it’s doing the shit it’s doing to a different place, like yr hands. I don’t think you can write down one linear thought with another thought being thought in your head. This is why people say their mind goes blank in extended periods of inspiration. The functioning has gone from being untethered and temporal, ie wandering thoughts, notions, speculating, to being possessed in a focused place, ie yr hands, which usually leads to a more focused expression of perhaps a thought of particular value, enough in the first place to require writing down. But tho this can be easy for some talented people, who might, as Joyce said, polish their nails while writing some genius thing, what does not come easy for anybody, because it is imposssible, is thinking two disparate things, of the everyday and of some behemoth philosophic concept, for example, without either one taken place after or before; or, one of them being intermittently disturbed, tho linearly, by the other, like a notification on yr phone- until at last one of the two breaks down, and the foxus superseded by the one left. This is especially novel. One thinks; one does not think and also think. That would make it two people in one head. Therefore we can presume that ones identity is found in the unity, or internal focus, of their story in thoughts down one narrow wire: thought can cross many paths and examine everything under and beyond th sun, but per person it is still in the singular. It cannot divide into two simultaneous paths of equal focus. there can be multilayered thoughts with a similar core concept behind them, and these can be thought simultaneously as much as one can ante up and dole out shades of emotion and shades of thought, and so on. But I cannot think of a teleological explanation for all creation and with the same focus Apply myself to letters in the mail. There is a dominant voice, and the rest, the mundane voice, is seen thru that lens.

ya cant say yr colorblind then gripe about people hatin ya cuz u r white. contradiction of terms no? if you really didnt see color, ud say people hated yr ass because yr a damnfool entrylevel, grunt-ass lowbrow. not because of the color of ya skin, which ya recognized and put to the forefront in making that very statement.

feel like uh, a priori is not intuition alone. Intuition is a function of the mind, while a priori is, if I understand Kant correctly, a representation synthesized before there is an object of focus available for the senses to interpret, ie an essentially true conclusion drawn, that has no need for a combined manifold, as, Kant tells us, is offered by merely living in space and time: time to extend and progress from cause to effect to cause, and space to do it in. In other words, intuition is cognitive- psychological, and a priori, theoretical- logical.

Pathos is the one thing most divine about people, for i see that in my worst state I can still grieve for the savaging of life’s last hope, and be uplifted, feel tears, at least for a little blessed while. There is no state so low that does not inspire one to at least pity themselves, and feel the comfort of passions, however mistaken or wretched the person.

i feel that / Some subjects do not even allow to be proved through the scientific method, yet they are still issues of a scientific nature and not just mysticism. the line is very thin however, since usually these subjects devolve into mysticism. In fact, if science only worked with that which could be proven, from the outset or otherwise, we’d have a pretty limited roster of discoveries. Sometimes discoveries can be made along the way towards proving; sometimes, discoveries can be made, scientifically, thru means that for lack of anything better, are entirely theoretical. And sometimes the search is not to prove something true but to clarify something. Science is not out to be incontrovertible.

The man in mismatched sox inhaled not as deeply as he would have liked at such a crescendo, even if on the third listen in a row, then, looked up at the massive pure blue upwards, cloudless, felt likely to cry for joy, but in the end simply mouthed the words:

“I’m gonna die of loneliness, fo sho.”

So often doth trespass our intuition upon realms and pathways of a more intimate enumeration of cause and effect than could be available to any witness, and that is available only to the actioning of objects involved in the event seen and analyzed by what and who were no player.

The crisis paid goodbyes in the form of telling your ass off, is what he said. But we all knew he thought he was merely a parable often enough already. We didn’t listen to the crisis, deliberately shut our ears like boxing them very slowly ourselves before anyone else could. Later in the year many terrible events would occur that were the direct result of ignoring his words. But nobody came around to believing he did it. The crisis was way off teaching prophecies someplace probably foreign. But if I refuse to be confined to learning from my own folly I should at least give the follies of others a chance. Fatass karma, and more hell than handbasket.

What the crisis he said was

HEY YOU DONT WANT TO FACE JACK, FACE? TELL ME ABOUT HOW CRUELTY CAN BE ELEGANT AGAIN. YOU ARE FACING NO SUCH BURDEN OF SIMPLY LIVING. TELL ME WHAT HALLUCINATIONS ARE, YOU SWOLLEN, DYSPEPTIC SHIT.

And to this day All I remember is him Looking slain already Like he’d be on the slab In days Or even hundreds of years from then And it’d be how, uh, how He looked then Slamming the door While my sister and things Was gatherin they buckets for weeping later In that queer disease of spite where You grieve for the vanquished enemy.

all triumph is in some sense humorous, for in itself triumph is the opposite of tragedy. that is why the soldier laughs as he shoots at a retreating enemy. there is an element of rowdiness that is somewhat comedic, taken in itself.

Numbers are the only symbols that stand for what they are. In this way they are more like hieroglyphs

is bed porn a thing? it should definitely be a thing.

THIS LIFE IS FILLED WITH DARKNESS THIS DARKNESS IS SO LIGHT GOD IN HEAVEN QUA SKY MUST BEAT WINGS TO KEEP ON GROUND NOTHING MUCH IS EVER FOUND NOTHING MUCH IS EVER FOUND. No symbols where none intended etc etc

No art is permanent, in that its aims in being created do not last, do not translate between epochs. I will never experience Homer as one living in Ancient Greece. Have not closely read Homer, but when I do it will be as myself in my time, with all the sullying context of those years from then to now only left to unguide me.

Kierkegaard tricks you into thinking he knows his insanity is illogical, the side effect of writing his labyrinths. The frightening moment comes when you realize how fiercely logical his insanity seems to him, and how insane the World actually is, and you wonder if it is that you do not understand it or just do not accept it.

[cephii]

1-200 let's go babe ;>

200: My crush’s name is: Jayjay the jet plane199: I was born in: 2003198: I am really: Hungry :^[197: My cellphone company is: T-mobile196: My eye color is: Blue?? Grey?? Something in between that. My eyes have yellow in them too, it’s weird 195: My shoe size is: either a 7 or 8?? I forgot194: My ring size is: I actually have no idea uH193: My height is: either 5′4 or 5′5192: I am allergic to: Certain food preservatives, something they put in sunscreen idk :^[191: My 1st car was: Lightning McQueen 190: My 1st job was: Being born189: Last book you read: The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde188: My bed is: Soft, occupied by me atm, queen sized 187: My pet: Don’t got one186: My best friend: tARA185: My favorite shampoo is: Idk, oof 184: Xbox or ps3: Don’t rly use either 183: Piggy banks are: Gay, kinda cute honestly 182: In my pockets: I’m not wearing pants right now181: On my calendar: I don’t use calenders 180: Marriage is: Amazing for people who actually care about each other! But not just to get married, divorce is NOT fun. 179: Spongebob can: control gravity 178: My mom: is a huge role model to me! (She might be very homophobic oof, but she’s great! When she first came to the US, she had to learn an entire new language, make enough money to feed 2 starving kids, and pay for my dad’s funeral, but 13 years later she is very very successful in a career she loves 177: The last three songs I bought were? Isle unto thyself (Joe Hawley) The Greatest Show Unearthed (Creature Feature) Hidden in the Sand (Tally Hall)176: Last YouTube video watched: Val Val Val175: How many cousins do you have? 5174: Do you have any siblings? Yes! Two of them. An 18 year old sister, and a 7 year old brother173: Are your parents divorced? nope :^0172: Are you taller than your mom? yES I AM 171: Do you play an instrument? I play the ukulele 170: What did you do yesterday? sCHOOL DANCE AND HAD MY FRIENDS SLEEP AT MY HOUSE OOF [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: No 168: Luck: No167: Fate: No166: Yourself: Sometimes165: Aliens: Yes164: Heaven: No163: Hell: To an extent 162: God: Nah man 161: Horoscopes: No160: Soul mates: In a way159: Ghosts: Yes158: Gay Marriage: YES 157: War: No156: Orbs: Nah155: Magic: Certain forms of it, yeah. [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: DONT MAKE ME CHOOSE 153: Drunk or High: Neither, both are damaging 152: Phone or Online: Online151: Red heads or Black haired: Red hair150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes 149: Hot or cold: Cold148: Summer or winter: Winter147: Autumn or Spring: Spring 146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla 145: Night or Day: Night 144: Oranges or Apples: Oranges143: Curly or Straight hair: I really love both142: McDonalds or Burger King: I don’t really like fast food but if I had to eat it then yeAH BURGER KING 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk chocolate 140: Mac or PC: Mac 139: Flip flops or high heals: Heels are prettier, but flip flops are wAY more comfortable 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Ugly and rich, oof137: Coke or Pepsi: I can’t drink soda136: Hillary or Obama: Obama135: Burried or cremated: Buried (as loNG AS I GET TO DECOMPOSE)134: Singing or Dancing: Singing133: Coach or Chanel: Coach132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: i cANT CHOOSE 131: Small town or Big city: Big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Why the fuck would I answer this128: Manicure or Pedicure: Neither 127: East Coast or West Coast: East Coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: My birthdaY 125: Chocolate or Flowers: Flowers 124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney123: Yankees or Red Sox: y A N K E E S [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: War is just extremely stupid?? Pointless?? All of the above?? There is no need to kill people because you have problems. Why can’t we just play chess or something? To win that, you must be very skilled and knowledgeable. Instead of the bloodthirsty leading us, the chess players should ;^0. Think about it! War is a primal instinct. We, as humans, like to distance ourselves from past methods. Instead of advancing something we’ve done for centuries, why don’t we just reinvent it entirely? War really is one of my biggest and most sincere fears, neither sides are just when they want to kill people with beautiful lives just to solve some problem that is solvable with a simple debate. 121: George Bush: Don’t know very much120: Gay Marriage: Very very important! There is no need to even debate when gay couples are statistically less likely to divorce. 119: The presidential election: Eugh118: Abortion: It’s up to the mother. I personally prefer giving the baby away for adoption, but I wouldn’t shame somebody for going through with it117: MySpace: Never used it116: Reality TV: Kinda stupid, makes me really uncomfortable honestly 115: Parents: Mixed opinions??114: Back stabbers: I deal with too many too often 113: Ebay: Can be pretty useful I guess112: Facebook: Don’t use it, but it’s alright I guess111: Work: Very important! 110: My Neighbors: My neighbors both have VERY cute dogs. One of them has a huge golden retriever, hes super sweet. The other has 2 German shepherds, super pretty dogs auGH 109: Gas Prices: Honestly just use electric cars, fuel is running out108: Designer Clothes: Some are nice. Some are stupid and really overpriced. 107: College: Go if you want to, it’s useful! But kinda really expensive 106: Sports: I like some of them!105: My family: Love one half, despise the other104: The future: Don’t make me think about it[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: 12:00-ish when my friend left today102: Last time you ate: 10 hours ago??101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: I don’t remember 100: Cried in front of someone: 3 days ago 99: Went to a movie theater:2 years ago-ish98: Took a vacation: 7 months ago97: Swam in a pool: a week ago:^]]96: Changed a diaper: Never have 95: Got my nails done: Never have 94: Went to a wedding: 8 years ago93: Broke a bone: Never have92: Got a peircing: 9 years ago (but that was against my will eeP)91: Broke the law: I basically am in some way, always. It might be a dumb law, but I never know for sure90: Texted: I am right now [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: Vini 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: My blankets87: The last movie I saw: La la land86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: The last day of school!85: The thing im not looking forward to: First day of summer84: People call me: Clyde, Milo, Meelo, Gay83: The most difficult thing to do is: Not take things personally 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Never ever 81: My zodiac sign is: Cancer80: The first person i talked to today was: Vini 79: First time you had a crush: When I was 478: The one person who i can’t hide things from: Vini, Eugene, and Melody77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Idk76: Right now I am talking to: jasmine and vini75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Idk, really. But I wanna be an astronomer!74: I have/will get a job: Idk, my parents won’t let me73: Tomorrow: comes today 72: Today: Is a sunday! Time to go to the store today 71: Next Summer: Is another summer70: Next Weekend: Idek oof 69: I have these pets: NONE OF THE PETS AHAHA68: The worst sound in the world: Someone I care about crying67: The person that makes me cry the most is: some ‘friends’ (In a bad way) Eugene (in the best way possible)66: People that make you happy: My (actual and not fake) friends! At least the ones who care to talk to me regularly 65: Last time I cried: like 30 minutes ago

64: My friends are: gay and half of them are fake as fuck 

63: My computer is: Pretty okay! Might not be the best, but she gets the job done62: My School: I’m terrified of any school, it’s a terrible experience. I’m just glad I have people to talk to that get my mind off of things I hate about the place! (Minus the times they start joking about the subject and it upsets me :’^[)61: My Car: I don’t own one personally 60: I lose all respect for people who: make children cry59: The movie I cried at was: I cry at most movies jfc 58: Your hair color is: dirty blonde! It looks red in some types of light tho57: TV shows you watch: Right now? I’m really just watching Huner x Hunter and Rick and Morty. Not keeping up with much else 56: Favorite web site: niceonedad.com55: Your dream vacation: Death valley! Primarily to see the stars 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: Cutting my arm open with a knife 53: How do you like your steak cooked: Well done52: My room is: Kinda clean51: My favorite celebrity is: Neil Patrick Harris 50: Where would you like to be: In sleepy land 49: Do you want children: No48: Ever been in love: Yes 47: Who’s your best friend: TaRA46: More guy friends or girl friends: I kinda have the same ammount of both45: One thing that makes you feel great is: When people say they love me44: One person that you wish you could see right now: Eugene43: Do you have a 5 year plan: no42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: I don’t like the thought of death at all, so a list wouldn’t help me41: Have you pre-named your children: No 40: Last person I got mad at: My dad39: I would like to move to: Poland38: I wish I was a professional: faggot[ My Favorites ]37: Candy: Krówki36: Vehicle: I like planes 35: President: Idk oopsies 34: State visited: Pennsylvania 33: Cellphone provider: Idk 32: Athlete: Idk ooF 31: Actor: Neil Patrick Harris 30: Actress: CANT DECIDE AUGHH 29: Singer: Joe Hawley 28: Band: Tally Hall 27: Clothing store: H&M26: Grocery store: I don’t care as long as you have strawberry milk25: TV show: Honestly the Octonauts 24: Movie: La La Land 23: Website: niceonedad.com22: Animal: GOAT 21: Theme park: Disney20: Holiday: Halloween 19: Sport to watch: baseball18: Sport to play: Badminton 17: Magazine: I don’t read them16: Book: Pride and Prejudice 15: Day of the week: Thursday 14: Beach: Idk :’^[13: Concert attended: I don’t go to concerts 12: Thing to cook: I like baking muffins 11: Food: S T R A W B E R R I E S 10: Restaurant: Idk, aughhHh9: Radio station: I don’t listen to the radio very much 8: Yankee candle scent: I can’t smell candles 7: Perfume: angel by thierry mugler6: Flower: Roses 5: Color: Pink4: Talk show host: Idk oof 3: Comedian: Drew Lynch 2: Dog breed: Chusky 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Indeed I did, my good friend