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#i dont know shit about them anymore but they make me go !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so i guess its still there
widevibratobitch · 6 months
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#im so tired of this lalalalalalalalaa#something is Wrong lol#i really need this therapy on wednesday but guess WHAT im not going. im going to a funeral instead 🤡#and ill be singing in that stupid fucking church because have to but i dont fucking wanna i hate doing it and i hate churches#all i feel rn is the overwhelming urge to selfdestruct and like obv im not gonna kms now#but im so fucking angry that im not even *allowed* to do that anymore. like it was such a comfort all this time to know that i can just Quit#and now i cant because guess what someone has to take care of my mother 🫠 and im so fucking tired of being someone people depend on#to handle THEIR feelings and THEIR emotions and just take it all with humility and acceptance and kindness and never snap and bite back#like i dont WANNA hear about your dead husband i dont wanna hear about your stupid fucking boyfriend#i dont wanna hear about the new guy/girl who's hitting on you because you're so hot and perfect#i dont wanna be responsible for how people feel. i should just shut up and take it and be humble and never ask or expect anything back#but when is it MY turn to call at 1 am crying about how im tired and want to kms#or to start expecting shit of people and allow myself to get properly angry at them for not meeting those expectations#or to braggingly 'complain' about something the other person clearly lacks without any consideration for their feelings#or to just openly cry and say deeply personal shit without any filter not caring if that other person is clearly uncomfortable af#because *i* need it right now and i need someone to listen and let them worry about how to even respond to that stuff#im just so tired of people expecting shit of me im tired of being made responsible even tho i clearly cannot handle that responsibility#i wanna be mean i wanna snap and get angry and openly say that i dont give a shit and am tired and cant listen to this rn#but i cant because i have to be a motherfucking mother theresa and never dare to demand something for myself#and idk where that comes from. idk if it's coming from the fanatic catholicism of my childhood or my mother or just from myself and idc#i just feel so horrible and guilty and wrong for wanting anything for myself#and it once again feels like im making myself the victim and the tortured martyr here when i should just shut up and take it#i just wanna lie down and die and not care about who'll get angry or judge or blame me for it im tired and i dont know what to do#i want someone to take care of ME and reassure ME and make ME feel like i matter and that they really will help me if i ever need it#and that they'd be kinda sad if i were gone not because i had a role to fulfill that i failed at by killing myself but because i am a person#<- math calculations flying around my head as i come to the terrible realisation#of just why exactly im so deeply obsessed with my voice teacher (aside from her being literally the most beautiful woman alive lol) 🤡#like babygirl stop being so utterly overwhelmingly kind to me my knees are weak i would do anything for you queen and I MEAN IT
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misspickman · 8 months
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cassierose for the ship ask game !!
Ship It
What made you ship it? i liked them in tt03, which you know, is truly a feat considering how terribly that comic treats both of them. but their dynamic (angry homoeroticism) managed to be compelling still
What are your favorite things about the ship? i enjoy girl antagonism from time to time. i know were all sick of the trope that teen girls all hate each others guts but considering cassie has a pretty good relationship with all the other girls on her team(s) its fun to see her just go ugh i hate this one. this one can go. theyre just fun and bitchy and i think they should hatefuck about it. but beside that theres also so much potential there ! i think you know, if anyone writing that comic actually cared about cassie or rose or about their character development, it would have been interesting to see their relationship change over time instead of getting one issue where cassie implicitly calls rose family while protecting her, and then the next one she immediately she calls her a manipulative psychopath for no good reason bc they cant figure out how to make the team interesting without having some wildly antagonistic relationship that doesnt make sense if u think about it for a few seconds. theyre never going to be besties but it would have been nice to see them go from blind hate to an uneasy truce; they dont like each other but they do, unfortunately, care about each other, and lets see where we go from that. + itd be interesting to dig into cassies hypocrisy when it comes to hating rose
Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? i guess its that i would like them to grow past mindlessly despising each other ? this is not me criticizing anyone but i feel like a lot of takes on cassierose ive seen are that they should stay in the hatefucking no mushy business❌❌❌phase which is definitely fair and true to how they are in tt03. but i do have some issues with the way they were written in tt03 (particularly cassie) and would like to see their dynamic progress from that (see rant above)
#i guess the reason im personally more interested in them sort of working through it is bc cassie doesnt have. a good reason for hating rose#i dont think its ooc but a lot of it Is supposed to be bc shes either jealous of her bc of tim (??)or thinks rose sucks bc she killed peopl#which is. she was drugged and manipulated and i think most teen titans in the superhero business should be able to handle#that sort of a not black and white situation#and idk. be more understanding. i know rose isnt super nice but maybe calling her a manipulative bitch constantly isnt the way to go#theres fun antagonism and theres cassie being just needlessly awful to her (that convo she and tim have about rose)#and i do think theyll always be bitchy to each other but i would like to imagine cassie is more considerate than this#and would eventually recognize she was occasionally just being shitty ! it would make for an interesting story ! alas#i think cassierose going from hating each others guts as teens to adult coworkers who dont really hate each other anymore#bc theyve been through so much shit together#but need to keep up the appearances of hating each other bc god forbid they admit to being kind of friends. that would be fun. to me<3#ask#thank you. so sorry this got so long#youve given me an excuse to rant about cassierose so this is what u get<3#sorry that the question was what i like about the ship and i just bitched about how it could be better#i guess the answer is im intrigued by the potential. also i love lesbians
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rose-skunk · 1 year
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Oh my god, did Mother Mother really just drop daycore and nightcore versions of *checks notes* 16 and 17 year old songs because they *flips throw notebook* got popular on tiktok 2 years ago and then the trends surrounding those songs died off as quickly as they sprung up?
I hate to say it since they're one of my favorite bands but they have really fallen off. They keep milking the popularity of Hayloft and their other songs that got big on tiktok. They're trying to appeal to the masses so hard instead of sticking to what made them popular in the first place, their charm and character as a quirky little indie band. This is so disappointing to see, they're currently in midst of making their 9th album but they keep clinging onto these couple songs, re-releasing them every few months to make sure people don't lose interest in them and it's sad to see that they've fallen off this hard
Inside felt so off and different from everything else they've put out and not in a good way. I was blinded by excitement for new MM content when it came out, it was the first album release I was around for as an active fan but it felt so watered down. Like they were trying to capture what their older records had while trying something completely different and it just kinda fell flat for me. I opened up spotify just before making this post to see the "new singles" and I let out an audible groan while saying, "Not this again...."
They have done eight. EIGHT remixes and acoustic versions and smash-ups for Hayloft, including Hayloft II itself. At this point it feels like they don't even care about their other records that aren't O My Heart or the songs that aren't their big hits. My favorite album by them, the one that got me into the rest of their music, their album that means the most to me, The Sticks, had its TEN YEAR anniversary LAST YEAR and they didn't do anything at all to acknowledge it. They did the special green translucent vinyl pressing for Eureka like a year or two before that! They just ignored The Sticks because they were busy pumping out more Hayloft garbage and they didn't want to take the spotlight off of it. I dont say any of this with hatred and malice, just frustration that they feel the need to beat this dead horse so goddamn hard. I'm over it
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snekdood · 2 years
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i really dont think i actually deserved all that bullshit. the internets traumatized me now at this point and literally no ones gonna care unless my abuser is honest and its so fucking exhausting.
#at this point its my mantra that yall only care about believing the victim you like. if two ppl are accusing eachother you're going#to pick the person you like more. that just seems to be the situation. and its so fucking dumb#all these ppl who call themselves progressive who do this are so fucking dumb#you only want to believe the victim you like and i just dont understand why you're willing to throw me in the trash over a lie#not even CONSIDERING it could be me at all. nah. bc if you had to consider that you'd probably just have to feel guilty for the way you#treated me#but lord knows hardly anyone on this website ever likes to admit they did anything wrong bc they found their safe haven where they can#be an eternal victim and they dont want to lose that#i genuinely think yall are the worst people to walk this earth and you provide literally 0 benefit for anyone else#i have no idea what possesses you to think its okay to treat me this way like at all#how are you so sure. how do you believe them so storngly that you can have this reaction to me#and why do you think its fine#to the person reading this going 'omg hes so dramatic 🙄' i dont think you under fucking stand#humans aren't supposed to have THIS much criticism. our brain isn't used to having criticism from like 200 people like this.#ive lost friend and followers over this situation.i saw someone i thought of as a friend shit talking me on a different site#friends*#theres people irl who wont talk to me anymore#i dont think you understand what that does to someones psyche#imagine you were sent to prison for some shit you didnt do. you might in your heart know you're innocent. but the fact that you're#in prison makes you second guess yourself. and im tired of living by tumblrs rule of law since people on here dont even have#the basic human decency to give due process.#theres fucking people online who accuse me of shit i didnt do or dont believe in all the time on here now and i dont think they#wouldve done it so hardcore had my ex decided to be honest from the get-go#it feels like they know deep down theyre lying so theyre trying to find or even make up more reasons to keep believing im bad#like im sorry i had a messy past and im upset not enough ppl care about trans men#i have no idea how that warrants this response though#and im not like??? bad politically??? like at all??#like when ppl try to find reasons im bad its either disingenuous. a common misconception. things taken out of context.#someone just simply refusing to see my point or perspective in any capacity.#ot its something from my past but even as far as my past goes ppl are extremely hyperbolic about it. i wasnt a fuckin nazi or something
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hecksupremechips · 2 months
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Had a very bad day Gotta eat gravel
#had to work a shift with only one other coworker and we were in this same position last weekend too and so like last time#he had this Moment where like as we locked up he was yelling very frustratedly about an annoying customer#which is fair but lol we dont know each other well enough for him to yell and rant like that to me like i get it but#god i hate yelling and just felt like shit and wanted to die#then tonight i was legitimately kinda scared cuz uh liiike. he had a lot more little Moments#i think like some kid dropped something and it broke and he had to clean it up and he got frustrated#and like. went in the back where the custom framing shit is and there was loud banging with a hammer and glass shattering#and he went back and did this multiple times and customers heard it too and were like uhhh 😰#i was already in a bad mood coming in and this really didnt help its honestly a miracle i didnt start having a meltdown#i guess ive just had to deal with so many man babies at home that all i can do is look at them like a disappointed parent and ask if they#would like me to take them to daycare#so yeah that was fun i uh dont like this guy hes always wearing very cutesy clothes and all i can think of is the bit where its like#‘there is nothing little about your things’#also i got money problems and keep getting fast food cuz i got eating problems and theres not much here i can eat and obviously#buying food so much wastes money so i was gonna try to make a sandwich today and like we dont have half the shit needed#and the bread was moldy obviously and theres so many bugs in the house cuz ive been too busy to clean and my sister was here#and the cat is here and my mom does everything wrong and then i spilled water everywhere and everything just went wrong#im also in a horrible place mentally doing so so bad so unbelievably stressed rn#just like. im repressing very bad and literally procrastinating having feelings like everything is going so wrong but i cant feel bad#because i dont have time for that so ill feel bad later when i escape which surely will happen someday ahahaha fuuuck#dont know whats real anymore maybe ive made everything up maybe the abuse is just me being dramatic maybe im the worst child in the world
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toastsnaffler · 4 months
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friends are making plans to go stay with each other but it's the weekend I'm going to see my favourite band. the universe fucking hates me
#I CANNOT have a third rsd episode in the space of a month i will kill myself. or at least do near irreperable damage#wish i was joking. i feel like im going to throw up even just thinking about it#well. well i can skip the concert i guess. i saw them last year anyway theyre just doing a second europe tour of the same album#and theyll probably release another album in a few years and i can see them again then#ahhh. ah okay okay i cant think about this right now ill decide at the weekend its not for a few weeks anyway#ahhhhhh but maybe theyre doing this bc they dont want me there idr if they know abt it already and if they wanted me there they would#plan it with me from the start instead of telling me once theyve already made the plan oh i cant do this right now i will Spiral#im going to take a cold shower 👍#to clear my head i was just starting to feel better @ my brain like that dont fucking ruin this for us andy samberg corgi gif#its fine i dont need to panic. im just frazzled from work i lost the ability to focus after like 3pm but they kept sending me emails with#stuff they want me to do before the end of the week and i was having stupid levels of task paralysis trying to think about it#bc i dont have time to fit everything into my schedule and its multiple projects so much thought. and my meds dont help anymore by then#AND ppl kept coming and finding me and giving me samples and verbal instructions for things and i couldnt write down bc i was busy#so ive probably forgotten smth important its fine its fine its just work#and tomorrow morning my meds will smooth everything out i can organise it then. but just made me feel so mentally congested#and ive had no signal again so couldnt even open tumblr to complain abt it#cold shower and then im gonna make stir fry so i have leftovers for lunch tmr to fuel me for the gym. and ill get my gym stuff ready#and i need to get my shit together bc im calling a friend tonight and i am NOT going to fall apart in front of them 👍#its all good its okay ill make everything work out#okay. showertime#.diaries
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learn-and-accept · 8 months
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#so yesterday I learned that i got invited to my partner's ex's baby shower and that shit feels so fucking messy#it is a bit weird they're still friends with their ex but they started out as friends and they're really close to her family so i get it#and they all know about me and her ex's mom even invited me on a ski trip so i feel really welcomed but it definitely feels messy#although im really glad that wasnt the first time i meet a bunch of people close to my partner because that shit seems overwhelming as fuck#i know it's gonna happen and i do want it to happen but fuck that shit is so scary#ive never had to do the whole meet your partner's family/loved ones before and i am nervous as fuck#though my girlfriend ended up meeting my mom and step dad like 2 months into dating so i guess meeting her people 4 months in is pretty fair#idk i think im just nervous im gonna fuck something up or they're gonna hate me#and then there's that added layer of it being their ex and her family#but im very secure in my relationship and i know there's nothing going on between them anymore and im not even worried about#it just feels weird to meet the person your partner loved before you and be worried about their opinion of you#because it does matter to me#i want them all to like to me or at the very least not dislike me#and honestly i think the only part that really concerns me is that the person who's basically a second mom to my partner is also her exs mom#like im essentially replacing her daughter#and i know that's probably not fair or even how she thinks of me and it's probably just my anxiety because she seems like a wonderful person#but it feels like i already have a strike against me#idk i think im just hormonal and insecure and tired and im definitely making this into something it shouldn't be#im just terrified of fucking this up because i love & care about my girlfriend so fucking much & i dont want the people she loves to hate me#i dont ever want to put her in a position where they feel like they have to choose between me and her found family#anyway this ended up spiraling lol#but honestly my relationship is going really well and im very happy with my incredible partner and she's truly my favorite person#they are so kind and considerate and funny and smart and truly one of the best people ive ever met#i feel so safe and loved and i am so happy to have her in my life#im just so used to people leaving me and having all the good things in my life end up crashing and burning down around me#and im so scared that's gonna happen#and honestly it might#i just really hope it doesn't because my life is so so so much better with them in it#personal
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homoerotvic · 11 months
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even though you were possibly the one to hurt my feelings the most in my entire life in every single dream you appear in i forgive you
#and it literally ruins my entire day. even thinking about you makes me feel like shit.#anyway the pain will pass and it will be like nothing ever happened im sure#also ive been dreaming about my first girlfriend and it makes me wonder if she dreams about me too#idk last time i saw her she looked so sick. im worried about her but its the weirdest feeling because... theres nothing i can do#we barely know eachother anymore but i still care about her so much#i know thats just the way it is but i sincerely just want her to be happy#i just know that i cant have anything to do with that anymore i guess#or i could because we could still ne friends but shes back in brazil so its a no go#p#this looks like a justgirlythings post oh well. send it#honestly its ridiculous how aforementioned first girlfriend broke up with me on my birthday while i was frankly depressed and alone#in a whole other continent lol#what this person did to me hurt harder. frfr. this whole situation makes me sick to my stomach#and i think they dont even like. think about it. or regret anything. or know i feel this way. and my stupid ass is here#avoiding the though of them at all costs. i just want this to pass and the hurt to be over it like i just have to forget all of it.#anyway its stupid shit. like the situation is not even that deep my feelings were just deeply hurt whatever so dw👍#ok the person who hurt me the most besides my mom but thats just like. what parents do#they hurt you irreparably without even noticing sometimes and then you just get over it. so im not counting that
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holytrickster · 1 year
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sitting there like has my art gotten better over time or do I just add way too much unnecessary detail now
#but lineart becomes honestly really meditative for me at times especially if im adding texture to something#i will say at least i dont pick such ugly colors anymore. i used to always have reslly bright colors and then i thought it was too much#and overcorrected imo so everything was desaturated and boring#oh i also used to color in the lines for like every single color on the character? idk how to describe it but it was tedious#i like it on other people's art but i dont have the patience and i dont like how it looks when my lines are “cleaner”#sometimes i do miss how i used to not care if what i drew was “cringy”#but i think im coming back out of that considering all i draw is like. gay shit and elves and various iterations of myself and also my ocs#i should redraw some really really old art after what im working on maybe#i almost started working on a redraw of when i drew yavanna in likr 2017-18 but i dont like the design i gave her at all#minus the weird branch ears those were cool#mostly im just frustrated it still takes me hours to draw lol. i dont know why i get insecure about it or about art in general#i guess bc no one in my family really does so they have this idea im good at it#and i wanna grab them and shake them sometimes and explain all the reasons im actually not and all the mistakes i regularly make#i dont know if that makes any sense and i dont know why i struggle to just take the compliment#i guess because i know im not good enough at it for it to be a job? except thats not it either because ive almost always wanted to write#its very dumb and weird. especially considering i dont really draw for other people. i mean i like when people like my art but unless its#for somebody specific im not necessarily going to take it very hard at all if its not to their taste. i just do it because i enjoy it#and because there are things i only know how to express through writing or drawing. and when one doesnt work sometimes its the other#maybe i just get frustrated i cant be good at everything#its not realistic but i always end up wanting to do so many things and getting frustrated when i dont pick them up right away#because OF COURSE i dont#ok where was i going with this#its nearly 2am and my head is pounding again i dont even know what day this makes it. at least a week?#i dont know
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confused-alpaca · 2 years
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dinosaur games make autism brain go brrr
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lxclerc · 6 months
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𝐬𝐨 𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 ─ 𝐦𝐯𝟏
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summary: where max verstappen is the subject of a love song from a singer who never writes love songs pairing: max verstappen x american singer!reader faceclaim: no one specifically but based off olivia rodrigo
note: me? writing max verstappen? smau fluff? on main? everyone look away.
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dailyynupdates
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liked by user33, user4, user16 and others
dailyynupdates yn was seen around monte carlo the past few days, taking pictures with fans and allegedly cozying up with three time world champion max verstappen
view all 104,210 comments...
user12 what is going on in the house of commons because this was the last thing i expected
user39 this is quite literally the most random pairing i've ever stumbled across
user91 how do they even know each other 😭 user63 right like...where did this even come from? how did it start? literally how did they meet? they could not be farthest apart in the sphere of famous people
user19 now who the hell is max verstappen and why is he with my wife?
user49 oh girl you have a lot to catch up on the max lore user71 max is a formula one driver user56 saying max is a formula 1 driver like he currently isn't dominating the sport to the point where people hates him saying he's making it boring since he keeps winning because he's just that fucking good that literally no other driver can keep up is kinda wild user10 oh so our girl's new man is good at his job user52 "good at his job might just be the biggest understatement of the century when it comes to max. man's a fucking beast at his job
user48 i dont have to see her with her ratty ex anymore omfg war is over
user93 dare i say...they're adorable
user82 yn being in an age appropriate, healthy relationship? i never thought the day would come
user74 we won for real 🥹🫶
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dailyynupdates
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liked by user23, user31, user69 and others
dailyynupdates max and yn in a video posted by yn's friend 😭
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user93 oh my god look at them 😭
user81 they look so in love i want to cry
user65 "maximillian, do i look pretty like this?" "you always look pretty" i couldn't quite catch what he said at the end but 😭😭😭
user85 dutch here and i believe he said "laiverd" which means darling user75 this means so much to me user65 you just made my entire week
user45 seeing her in love after all the shit men is healing a part of me i didnt know was broken
user53 max fixing her hood then kissing her cheek what if you just stabbed me
user31 every time i see these, i get the urge to take a shot of bleach 😀
sincerelyyn ✓
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liked by conangrey, maxverstappen1, taylorswift and others
sincerelyyn can't have a conversation if it's not all about you
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yourfriend as the other person of those conversations, he's fine i guess 😒
sincerelyyn you know i love youuuuu
taylorswift love seeing you happy ❤️
sincerelyyn ❤️❤️ user73 mother is all of us user63 you know it's real when it's taylor swift approved
conangrey i hate happy couples i hope you both trip 🫶
sincerelyyn die 🫶
user92 their friendship is everything to me
user15 not girlie trying to soft launch like we all don't know who it is 😭
user43 THEYRE SO ‼️🥵🥰⚠️
user65 you're so right
user24 i'm so happy finally seeing our girl happy 😭
user84 "someday i'll be everything to somebody else" YES YOU ARE BABYGIRL 😭
maxverstappen1
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liked by sincerelyyn, charles_leclerc, landonorris and others
maxverstappen1 my american girl 🩷
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charles_leclerc i still can't believe this is happening
maxverstappen1 for someone who don't even follow me, you sure are early to my posts 😒 user91 max gagged him with that im afraid
landonorris please please max talk to her about getting me tickets 😭
user85 lando is just like us fr struggling to get guts tour tickets maxverstappen1 no ❤️ landonorris 😔 sincerelyyn @landonorris let me get you in contact with my team 🤍 maxverstappen1 baby noooo sincerelyyn be nice, max landonorris HELL YEAH THANKS YN user42 this is the crossover i never thought i needed
user66 max posting non racing content and being all soft in the comments for yn in what world am i in
user52 fr i feel like im in an alternate universe 😭
sincerelyyn love youuuu
maxverstappen1 love you more
sincelyyn i never knew love could be so golden till i met you <3
maxverstappen1 mijn hele hart is van jou, schat (you own my entire heart, darling) user42 they mean so very much to me 😭
danielricciardo god the two of you make me nauseous
maxverstappen1 hating because you ain't us danielricciardo im not liking that attitude, kid 😒 user71 daniel is so us
sincerelyyn
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liked by maxverstappen1, taylorswift, yourfriend and others
sincerelyyn so american will be out on all platforms at midnight. a letter to the man i love, the only way i know how ❤️
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maxverstappen1 i adore you with everything in my being ❤️
sincerelyyn ik hou van je (i love you)
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i hope you guys liked this as much as i loved writing it 🫶
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pankiebogs · 18 days
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ii16 spoilers under cut
MORE talk about fan similar to the other post because there is still a lot to say. This is more about what fan means to mephone
Compared to most of the other contestants, Fan wasn't originally created to BE a contestant, which I find most interesting. Fan was quite literally created to be a fan of the show and randomly appears in season 1 (and he also delivers food I guess). Even if Mephone4 consciously made Fan or not, his appearance and creation obviously meant Mephone wanted appreciation for the things he was making, as is Fan's main purpose and service to Mephone. Fan is technically a manifestation of Mephone's love for the show itself, but he is also expressing vulnerable happiness of which Mephone feels like he could not express properly considering his issues with vulnerability. This might be why he is so outwardly dismissive of Fan's strong emotional enthusiasm for the show!!
So Fan technically is a support Mephone desperately wants, but he can't respond well to- but this definitely means Mephone appreciates Fan's dedication as he quite literally wished for Fan to exist as he is, being such an engaged Fan. He expresses passion for the show in a way Mephone couldn't do himself! Fan gives Mephone support as complete opposite to what Mephone feels Cobs would have! And you know what else Cobs does that Fan has an extreme well known trait of disliking and being scared of? Change. Cobs constantly reinvents, makes new things, discards old things, but Fan latches on. He observes patterns, he begs for predictability, structure and consistency.
Another notable trait of Fan is his defensiveness. Even if he's not good at it, he's incredibly stubborn to protect his passion and love to no end, being incredibly irrational about it. Cobs is well. Yeah. Massive Passion Disliker. He don't gaf about that. Fan might've looked up to cobs and meeple, but god if he's not possibly a parallel that's the opposite. I'm going to walk into the ocean. Im forever gonna think about how fan was created to be a support. like his entire goddam purpose is to love something so much!!!! and give it so much attention! and he is having so much fun doing it!!! IT IS MAKING ME CRAZY!!!!
I'm not sure if the characters are partly "extensions" of Mephone or if they're Mephone projecting specific parts of himself, I believe most of all they are created from his desire (like, wanting a specific thing and that thing just appears for him if this is done unintentionally,) but either way I enjoy thinking about what each trait that manifested for Fan's character specifically would resonate with Mephone's experiences and why he would create him with those traits. or something.
My working theory is that Mephone labeled each character in his mind as one thing, such as "the jerk" for Knife and nothing more, letting the contestants take their own shape and personality as they gain more experience on the show, which I feel is validated through Lightbulb saying "I don't think we were all there yet" once seeing the season 1 contestants in alternate reality show! They build more of their personality as it goes along. I think Mephone has minimal control of the contestants personality wise after he's generated them, but i do think he influences their memories or experience with time or something?? I dont know. guess we will all see. Also this somehow isn't about fan anymore wow that's weird actually who am i where am i
relevant drawing. Time to collapse to my knees over this shit again
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poppy-metal · 3 months
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CREEP SEASON FINALÉ
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MWAHAHAHAHHA
patrick ends up threatening birdie - to no one's suprise - surprisingly, he isn't as mean as he could've been - or even as much as he planned to be. you had this kind of pathetic aura to you. a kind of wide doe eyed startled expression when you saw him. it was clear you'd dolled yourself up - or at least attempted to. your eyeliner was wobbly. your lipgloss too tacky. your hair was a hackjob, but it could be interpreted as stylish, he guessed. didn't dress too shabby, either.
all in all you were cute. for a stalker, anyway.
"you know." was the first thing he said, looking you up and down from where he leaned against the gym building. "if you'd just approached art like this normally, I'd give you at least a 50/50 shot."
you looked down at your shoes. he could tell you wanted to bolt, but you knew you were caught. his fate was in your hands.
"you're kind of a fucking freak, you know that?"
you didn't answer and patrick felt a spark of irritation. all that shit you spouted about art being your god, about wanting to live in his skin and fucking have his babies, and here you were, shy as a lamb. couldn't even look him in the eye and own up to what a pervert you were.
"i bet you do." he took his hands out of his hoodie pockets and approached you. you backed away as he did, but he followed and it wasn't long before he had you pressed against the brick wall. looking up at him with big worried eyes. like you were the victim, here. "really - you're not half bad to look at. I'd fuck you."
you flinched at the words. worried your bottom lip between your teeth and shook your head. but that was all, still not a word. it was really starting to piss him the fuck off.
"is that what it was all about?" he placed a hand at your waist - felt the muscles in your body jump at the contact but he pressed in close. pinned you. "you need some dick?"
he skated his hand up your body - to the swell of your breast - felt himself get hard, despite it all, because fuck, you really were cute. he hadn't gotten laid since he landed.
"maybe i should see what this pussies all about. you put coke up there or something? got poor artie fucking hooked on some shit he hasn't even tested yet." he squeezed your tit, painfully. enough to make you jump. it wasn't meant to feel good and he leered at the whine you let out. pinched your nipple between his fingers meanly. "got yourself real nice and pretty, huh? what kind of friend would i be if i didn't test the goods first -"
"no!"
it burst from your chest. somehow loud and quiet all at once - your hand came up to strike him, but patrick caught it easily. stepping back and squeezing your wrist so hard you whimpered. "d - dont touch me." you gasped, jerking your hand back. cradling it to your chest - you felt sick. sick to your stomach. you wanted to scream for help but knew how ridiculous that'd be considering what led you here. you were trapped.
patrick glared at you.
"you're going to write art one more letter." he said. your eyes widened. "you're going to tell him it was all a game - that you never meant it to get this far - tell him you never meant anything you said. that it was all lies to mess with his head. that it was supposed to be fun but its not anymore and you're ending it."
you stared at him in shock. the cool night air made strands of your hair float in front of your face like tendrils of doom and you imagined choking on them until you died.
"i cant -" you said. "it wasn't a game. I love -"
"you're sick. you dont know what love is." at this patricks eyes seemed to soften. with pity. your gut churned. "and you can. you dont have a choice."
you didn't like his tone. didn't like the finality of it.
"because i took pictures of everything i saw - the letters - the messages - all of it. its right here -" he pulled a hardrive out of his jeans pocket. "and if you dont do what i say, this is all going to the police."
you closed your eyes. felt a cold calm sense of dread settle over your heart.
"i dont care." you said pitifully, eyes pricking with tears. "turn me in - i dont care. i cant lie to him."
patrick sighed.
"i was afraid you'd say that. which is why im telling you - if you do this - I'll give you updates. on art and how hes doing. if you're in prison - you'll never hear from him or about him again. which of those options sounds better to you?"
you didn’t even have to think about it.
"I'll write the letter."
patrick smiled.
"i knew you would."
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the letter comes the next day. It's waiting for art in his dorm room, slid under the small gap - he nearly drops his phone in his rush to pick it up and read it. he's meant to be meeting patrick for lunch - but he can cancel - will cancel a million lunches if it means he hears from you again - gets to read your words - gets to talk to you - he hopes after he reads you'll answer his texts. let him call you. anything.
his eyes scan the inked words on the page and the eager smile on his face slips slowly - his bag drops from his limp hand. he finishes the letter. sits on his bed and stares blankly at nothing for a long time.
something in his chest breaks. in his mind too. he can feel the crack frissure and then the shattering of it. like glass. he tastes blood in his mouth and realizes he's been biting his lip hard enough to make it bleed. he rubs the red stain from his mouth and numbly stares at it. he thinks 'i want her to die for this.'
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gettinontopic · 2 months
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This is so transphobic like what the hell is this
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[Image Id: A large addition to a tumblr poat reading "Also if I'm going to be honest, passing as a man is also just easier than passing as a woman. The rules to being a man and passing as a man are much more lenient than being a woman or passing as a woman. Trans women have to worry about shit like "I need to wear an outfit that distracts people from the fact I have an adams apple, and not allow people to see that I have shoulders, and learn makeup and basically become a voice actor and etc. and maybe I won't be called a man today" (and if you pass too well and the wrong cis guy feels guilty about being attracted to you, you get murdered meanwhile if you're a trans guy and you wanna pass as a man, you gotta like have short hair and hide or remove your boobs and at this point you can already just go to the grocery store and most people will see you as a man. Once you get facial hair and a deeper voice, most people will just see you as some guy. Like I don't understand why transmascs insist on this idea that they could never really pass. Like the idea that trans man who passes is almost far-fetched. Weird as hell." End Id]
Lets upack this shall we?
1."Passing as a man is easier than passing as a woman"
No it's not. The rules to being a man and passing as a men as strict as lots of rules for women. Have you ever seen a cis guys who fails to pass? They're called names, theyre physically beat, and theyre often ostracized from their cis peers just as fast as any trans person. Cis boys cant even pass half the time by the rules they made. Quit fucking lying about men just magically having it so easy.
Your experiences as passing as a man aren't universal and if you've never passed as one what makes you think it's fucking easy?
Also god forbid you're a black man, or a black man who is into something deemed feminine. Shit I've seen guys call black men women for wearing a damn hair bonnet.
Oh not to mention I'm only a man to transphobes when they can call me a "dangerous black man" only to switch back to tryibg to detransition me by saying "you can just be a masc girl!"
2.Adams apple
While you have to hide yours, I have to wear shit that distracts people that I *don't* have one. Cause, and I know this is wild, if they expect you not to have one for being a women, what do they expect me to have for being a man? Hmm? And if you're a man who's adams apple never came in? I've seen them called girls to. Shit I've heard a guy called not manly for missing his, and he was still in puberty!!
3.Shoulders
While you have to hide you shoulders, I have to do whatever I can to have the.. small shoulders on men? maybe if youre in a "non manly" field like music or art, but I do gym work. I better look likeit regardless of the disability that effacts my muscles growth and development or I am called maam by every guy there. Which sucks btw.
4. Makeup and voice acting:
Trans men also are regularly advised to wear makeup that masculinizes them and do voice training. thats some of our oldest passing tips. thats litterally never been unique to trans women. what the FUCK kinda of implications are you trying to put out here?
5. Murder:
Hey did you know cis guys will murder trans men bc they were attracted to them and then found out they werent "real men" and then kill them. shit cis women also kill us if they find out they were attracted to us and we aren't their ideal man anymore. do u know how men who hear im butch and into women behave?
Fuck right the fuck off trying to tokenize the murder lf trans women while throwing trans men murders in the "that doesn't happen" bin.
6. How many times have we said short hair and no boobs dont fucking automatically gets us gendered correcly!! We have voices that have to be trained, we have muscles were expected to build,and some men even watch the way you walk to guess if you have a dick or not.
Listen to any trans men. any of us for five minutes. those things do not making an easily passing trans man fuck you for lying about our experiences as not a trans man.
7. "You gotta like have short hair or remove your boobs"
Untrue! just Untrue. we also have to preform the rules of manhood really well. ive seen beareded transmen clocked for like so many different other reasons and you wouldn't listen to those men if it would save all trans people lives forever. cis men constantly dig at other men presentation to keep each other in line. Its a regular for them.
Also: not all of want to pass with those features. I deserve to have long hair and not bind and still pass as a man and you suck for defining everything around passing.
8. I don't know why you insist on this idea that trans women never really pass without obscene work (when ive met trans women that admit they have it easy by throwing on a dress and wearing her hair down) and that all trans men who have ascess to transition magically do pass (When multiple of us transitioning have said we dont)
If we can't talk about the ones who don't pass then you kinda can just sweep away the idea we don't face discrimination or danger and that's getting us killed actually.
None of us have said we can all never really pass any who say they can't are usually speaking on their own experiences. Because you want us all to pass so bad you don't care that we don't, and that it gets us backlash and hurt.
Also, if you ever read this, kiss my black ass and go reevaluate what makes you think you should speak on experiences that aint yours as if you're the one with the Hard Cold Facts.
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yusa-lisaxyuta · 1 month
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JORDAN LI HOURS OMH
ok guys im sorry i just have some thots i must share about my lord and savior Jordan Li bc oh my GOD
the different genres of Jordan too mmnmsmsnsnhshshsmd
LIKE LIKE LIKE
we have your average roommate!Jordan thats an absolute dick to u bc they want u so bad bro
always pissing u off on purpose with stupidly loud moans, PRAYING it pisses you off enough times after youve had to find refuge in marie or andre's dorms bc wtf
the way theyre so desperate it doesnt make sense anymore i swear
they literally have not even the slightest clue on how to show how much they fucking adore you so they decide to be a dick about it every chance they get because theyre more emotionally fucking constipated than katsuki bakugou himself BUT JORDAN CANT HELP IT!!!! THEY WANT U!!!! JUST U!! ONLY U!!! And they're tight asf when they cant have u!!!! LIKE WHY CANT THEY HAVE U!!!
soon they corner u and confess everything to u while just blindly raging bc they're sick and tired of this shit n at first ur js like "um what" bc you didnt realize at all and thought they hated u
and they say it so condescendingly too??? on some "Stupid fucking freshie, your fuckin' scent is all over my shit. Shit drives me wild, you know what you fuckin do to me? I dont think so. Of fucking course you dont." LIKE AAA???? But in REALITY they're praising EVERYYYYY little thinggggggg. DOWN TO UR SHITTY HANDWRITING WHEN YOU JOT THINGS DOWN?! Fucking perfect to them. But it gets them so mad, they're used to getting what they want. And they dont know how to handle it when they cant-
OH BUT WHEN JORDAN GETS U FINALLY???? OH ITS OVER FOR U POOR THING
you genuinely arent prepared for the type of down bad desperate needy sex you two have your first time together oh my GOD you dont understand
"Mine- fuckin' waited way too long, and fought too hard for this pretty pussy- pussy's mine, heart's mine- shit- can feel the heart in the pussy, mama- fuck-!"
oh no but then we have Mafia!Jordan???? UM HELLO???
(cw/tw: guns used during sex [im sorry something in my head goes wonky with jordan and guns in the same vicinity])
GETTING BENT OVER AND RAILED WITH JORDAN PUTTING A GUN TO UR HEAD???!??! AUUUURRRRR?@?!?!?
no because the dirty talk would be on POINT oh em gee think about it
"Cmon princess- don't fuckin' run. I'll make you regret it- cmon, baby. Take this fuckin' dick- fuckin love this princess cunt."
HELLOOOOOO???? sorry brb i DIED FROM OVULATION
bros makes my ovaries do backflips i swear
AND THE WAY THAT THEY SPOIL YOU?!!?!?! Now see EVERY JORDAN finna apoil tf outta you BUT MAFIA JORDAN OH GOOD GAY GOLLY GUYS. OHHHH GOLLY. The way they're such a fuckin jerk and so cold to everyone else but they make sure you ALWAYS feel like their precious little princess AUUUUGGGHHHH
"I swear, ask me for the price of that shit one more time- just fuckin' get it. Ok? Last fuckin' time i say it. Now let's go, you said you wanted to stop at Prada, right?"
this person would watch you take hours to pick out cute outfits, blow a couple racks on that shit, and watch you skip to the next store happily knowing DAMN well they have every intention to ruin that outfit.....also with the intention of buying you a better one, of course.
BACK TO THE GUNS IM SORRY BUT HEAR ME OUT- someone getting too close to u for their liking and touching you with the cold metal as punishment <3333 i mean they know you only have eyes for them but where's the fun in that, yk?
"Im guessing you like this, huh? Like when others give you attention so i can get like this, baby? If you wanted this you just had to ask... but, 'm mad now.. 'n you're gonna take everything i give you."
gahshshgshagdhsg sorry guys the demons took over im still waiting for s2 of genv 🙏 pls i need more jordan 🙏 🙏 🙏
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hecksupremechips · 5 months
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The most validating thing about having a brother in law is sometimes I’ll make a comment about my parents being kinda horrible and he’ll just be like "DUDE FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT IVE BEEN THINKING THIS THE WHOLE TIME BUT DIDNT KNOW HOW TO ADDRESS IT"
#the klock keeps ticking#like i remember about 2 years ago when it really clicked with me that my parents were worse than i let myself believe#i had like covid and so to be safe i completely isolated myself in my room and only came out when no one was around#or with a mask on just to get food or use the bathroom that was it#and like when i had mostly recovered i stopped isolating and i looked around and noticed huh the house is kinda a hot mess#and i realized it was because i was the one who kept up with like basic cleaning and making sure things were in order#so like a little bit later i was in the car with my sister and brother in law and i was talking about this#and i was like ‘i think ive realized our parents are kinda unable to take care of themselves without me doing it for them’#and my BIL was like IM SO GLAD YOU FINALLY NOTICED THIS HAS BEEN DRIVING ME CRAZY FOR YEARS#which was just so validating i was like okay so im not just being an ass like this is an actual problem#and idk a more recent thing that maybe uh. made me a little bit emotional was we were basically at a cool place where you can climb shit#and he was just kinda there helping me when it seemed i was gonna lose balance to make sure i didnt get hurt#as well as my sister too and i was like oh god is this was like. basic affection feels like???#is this what it feels like to have someone care like actually kinda give a fuck about your safety and well being???#so yeah i maybe am still not okay with that and still dont know how to feel anymore 😭#so i guess even though hes stinky and i like to bully him I GUESS hes actually a pretty cool guy and he does make my sister happy and he#treats her with respect and hes very good with their cat so yeah maybe i actually really appreciate him and care more about him#than i do my parents and most people in my family#but i cant say that cuz then itll like. go straight to his head 🥺#and he still wont play pokepark 2 with me even though he PROMISED its been like 4 years since he said that and WE STILL HAVENT PLAYED IT 👺👺👺
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