#i have a couple other videos in the travel tag of people doing this trip

[rongzhi]

Announcements on the Qinghai-Tibet train route.

English added by me :)

[kysonwrites]

ᵃⁿˣⁱᵉᵗʸ ⁻ ᵐᵃᵗᵗ ˢᵗᵘʳⁿⁱᵒˡᵒ

↳ summary: reader is having a very bad day, and has a panic attack. matt and madi are there for her though.

↳ warnings: mentions of anxiety, and crying. let me know if i missed any! :)

↳ author's note: by the way if anyone is struggling with mental health, please do not be scared to reach out, and talk to me. i love you all, and only want the best for you guys.

↳ disclaimer: reader is female, she/her pronouns used!

you were an influencer as well, thriving with six million subscribers on youtube, and a couple million on all other platforms. you started posting content around two years ago, and people grew extremely quickly to like you. then when you started dating matt sturniolo five months ago, and things went slightly downhill. you would get hate for dating him, he would get hate for dating you. the hate consisted of,

"why her?"

"she's so gross, omg..."

or.

"she could do much better then him."

"please he's so pathetic."

now you did a very good job on blocking the haters out, because you have many many more supporters and fans, then people who went out of their way to try to fuck up your ego. except for today, you had a twin sister, and she was your rock. your everything, she knew how to lighten your day better then anyone else could. she knew, and could feel when your anxiety was getting bad. only she was on a trip, to travel to get her new puppy, that you two would be sharing. you didn't tag along with her because you had videos to film and stuff to do.

something didn't feel right, your mind was filled with thoughts. you couldn't get them out of your head, you played with your fingers as you sat on the triplet's living room couch in la. while nick had his arm around you, talking to chris. you knew you were very attractive, everyone told you all the time. it wasn't your looks that bothered you, hell nothing bothered you. it was just one of those days, that nothing was the cause of making you upset, you just were upset.

"hey, you okay?" matt asked, emerging from the bathroom. he saw your zoned out state.

"yeah, no i'm good. just have to use the restroom." you rambled, before getting up, feeling nick's arm fall from you, and closing the bathroom door behind you. he knew something was up, but wanted to wait until you came out of the bathroom to talk to you about it.

you hadn't had a panic attack in years, you've became so much more healthier, and happier. you had nothing in your life to panic about anymore, but for the thousandth time that day, you felt strange. then you felt the tear fall from your eye, and you sat on the closed toilet seat.

"fuck." you whispered, as you felt your breathing pick up and your tears became to rush from your eyes quicker.

"y/n?" matt asked, you heard him knock.

"yeah?" you tried to sound calm, but it came out squeaky, and rushed.

"you okay? lemme in." he asked the first half, and demanded the other.

"i just,- okay." you tried to lie, but knew he already caught on and you stood up to open the door. as soon as you saw him, you held your chest struggling to breath.

"hey, hey." matt consoled you, as he lowered you to the floor with him. he held you in his arms, as you cried. "what happened, y/n/n?" he asked, not really expecting an answer, he just said it so you remembered he was there.

"i-" you tried to speak, but just clung to him tighter. if you could breath any harder, you did.

madi was your best friend, and she walked by the door looking for you. she gasped as she saw the state you were in, and she quickly moved to the kitchen to get you water.

"breath with me, okay?" he asked, guiding your hand gently to his chest to feel his breathing. "in and out, okay baby?" he saw your eyes, filled with tears. his heart broke, hes never seen you cry before. and it hurt him to see you like this, he hated it. "please don't cry, y/n/n." he said quietly, as your breathing began to slow down.

madi came back with water, and handed it to matt, to give to you. you took the water and sipped it, but when you saw madi's socks. you reached up for her hand, and she sat down next to you. she began to rub your back, smiling softly at you.

"better now?" madi said, nodding her head at you, waiting for an answer.

"yeah, thank you guys." you spoke, while standing up. matt helped you.

"wanna talk about it?" matt said, leading you to his room with madi following.

"sure, madi c'mon." she stopped at matts door frame, as if she didn't know if she was wanted. she stepped into matts room, and she shut the door behind her. you sat on the bed, and matt sat next to you, madi sat down on the other side of you. they looked at you, waiting for you to speak with such kind eyes. "i feel like i was just having an off day, y'know? nothing really made me sad, or panicked. i just felt like it." you explained, looking down kicking your feet while looking at them.

"i know, whenever you feel like that, just make sure you tell us next time." matt said, looking down at you with gentle eyes.

"never feel scared to talk to us, your my best friend. i love you." madi said, bringing you in for a hug.

"i love you guys both, so much." while madi was hugging you, you wrapped one arm around her, and opened the other for matt. he hugged you, and planted a kiss on your temple.

what would you do without them?

[rainbowsky]

I haven’t had any questions lately but love your blog and your insights. In a video of the group photo at Milan fashion week, GG is sitting next to the older man and they are talking. I figure in some videos when GG is talking to others he has translators but it does not look like anyone from his staff is around and I was wondering if they were speaking in English or what other languages he might speak. Love to hear your insights and hope you are doing well.

Hi coyote! Thanks so much, I'm glad you're enjoying my blog! 😊

The man he's seen talking with a lot is Diego Della Valle, the CEO of Tod's. GG has a fantastic relationship with him, and he even referred to him as yeye (grandpa) in his Vogue interview from the show.

Last time GG was in Milan Della Valle took GG on a tour of some beautiful sites around Italy - including the Colloseum in Rome -and some sites significant to the brand (the workshop, the flagship store, etc.). GG got to spend a lot of time with him, so they had plenty of opportunity to build a strong relationship.

You can tell just by his entire demeanour around GG that Della Valle adores GG. Which makes absolute sense given how cute, gracious and charming GG is. When GG arrived at the Tod's show this year Della Valle lit up like a Christmas tree.

They sat together last year at the Tod's show as well (those who missed out on last year's trip can check out my 'gg milan fashion week 2023' tag).

Anyway, you weren't asking about Della Valle, you were asking about how GG is able to communicate with him. The simple answer is that GG does have some English!

Many students in China learn English in school, although they sometimes don't get as much opportunity to speak it, so it's probably kind of like my French - I understand quite well to hear, read and write it, but my accent and pronunciation are a bit rough around the edges (that's putting it mildly 😅).

With the international travel he's done and all the elbow-rubbing he's had to do with foreign celebrities and brand stakeholders I think GG has had a lot more opportunity than the average person to exercise his language skills, so I've no doubt he's improving all the time.

He's also a huge music lover and has many times been seen singing English songs from Avril Lavigne, Ellie Goulding, Sam Smith and many more. A couple of English performances he's done in the past:

Starts at 3:22 (I'll never get over hockey player GG 🥲).

It also seems clear that GG has a general interest in languages. He knows a fair bit of Korean and he and DD are seen in The Untamed BTS speaking various languages and dialects, including English. This is also a common feature of LRLG rumors.

There are many clips to be found online of GG speaking English for ads, occasionally a few lines for drama roles, throwing in English phrases into interviews, etc. Just based those alone I think one can tell that he's got pretty good English. His pronunciation is quite good.

If you watch some of the vlogs he's posted from the international events, and some of the clips shared by brands and magazines, you can catch moments of GG having English interactions with many people at those events. One of my absolute favorites is when he's replying to a bodyguard in a vlog when he was in Florence last year (starts at 4:08).

The bodyguard is trying to teach him how to roll his r to pronounce Florence in Italian ('Firenze') and GG says, "I can't do it." The way he says it is so damn cute, I almost died when I heard it.

Anyway, so to answer your question, GG speaks in English with Della Valle and others at those events!

[finerllines]

glasgow [dad!h]

a/n: hello!! i know this is super late but i wanted to write something tour related for darcy and dylan. this is best attempt at writing angst lol there is still a fluff, happy ending because i am a big baby please reblog and comment (and send feedback) !!! especially because my stuff hasn't been showing up under tag searches so they are not reaching many people :P i also post on wattpad if you prefer!!

wc: 1.5k+

summary: big day (complimentary) for harry's career but big day (derogatory) for harry as a dad

cw: just a couple effs and jeffs

Turns out being a rockstar wife and mother is not as easy as being a rockstar girlfriend. Instead of just being responsible for scheduling and taking behind the scenes content, she now has to pack for two one year olds, who are starting to teeth, on top of ensuring that every green room, hotel room, and tour bus has the proper accommodations for the family of four.

Does she miss parading around with Harry looking hot? Sure. But would she change a thing about her life now? Never.

Well, usually her response would be never, but right now she wants to throttle her husband.

“Harry, don’t forget to pack the bassinets, okay.”

Not looking up from his screen he hums, “Mmmh.”

She doesn’t know what to take from that response.

She knows he has been busy and stressed with his upcoming tour being the biggest solo venues yet. He’s spent the whole week rewatching rehearsal videos and looking over the stadium plans to mentally map out his show. This week at home was pencilled in to give him a little break between the promo shows and the tour, and y/n had hoped that they’d get to spend some time together as a family and let the twins to play outside before they would be relegated to just playing among themselves in hotel rooms. Unfortunately, Harry’s mind has been so preoccupied with the shows that most of the trips to the park have been without him.

Harry has always been good with splitting his time between family and career, living up to his promise that being a dad would always be a priority, so y/n lets him spend the week working this one time. However, her generosity is wearing thin.

The only thing designated to Harry (on top of packing his day clothes and carry on) is packing the bassinets, which encompasses breaking them down into parts and tessellating them in their travel bags. Simple enough. But they are set to leave tomorrow, and the bassinets have yet to be touched and every time she has reminded him to get on it, he has similarly agreed dismissively. She wants to trust her husband because he’s not one to be irresponsible, especially not with his babies, but her mum instincts are telling her to not take it for granted.

So, she reminds Harry again when they sit down for lunch, before y/n leaves for a walk with the twins, and in the middle of dinner, the last of which causes him to snap.

“Geez,” he exclaims whilst letting his cutlery fall noisily onto the marble table, “how many times are you gonna remind me. I’m not a child, I don’t need to be nagged at.” 

Taken aback by his sudden attitude, she stares at him unmoving with eyebrows pinched.

“I just don’t want you to forget considering that we’re leaving early tomorrow morning and it’s still not packed. And every time I’ve reminded you, you’ve been busy with work stuff, I don’t know if you’ve actually heard me. Maybe if you just communicated with me like an adult then I wouldn’t have to keeping reminding you.”

He rolls his eyes this time. “If y’know I’m busy with work then why do you keep bothering me. Two babies aren’t enough to keep you preoccupied. Fuck.”

“Fine,” she replies shortly, “I’m sorry for disrupting your work, Harry. Feel free to get back to work whenever you wish.”

She clears her plate, then carries the twins up to get them ready for bed silently, not looking back at him once. He rolls his eyes at her attitude again and huffs under his breath as he goes back to eating.

They fall asleep without saying another word to each other.

-

Backstage is bustling with activity. Mitski just started her set and the band are listening from the screen in the green room while trying to get focused.

The crowd is huge, and it only seemed to be getting larger.

Harry hasn’t played venues like this in years and to say he’s nervous is an understatement. For once, he isn’t feeding positively on the crowd’s energy, and being around the crew isn’t helping because everyone is a little on edge, all radiating nervousness. Wanting to take his mind off the show, he heads to the family green room, it’s almost time to put the twins down for bed anyways.

“Hi my loves, can I …” he trails off as he takes in the scene in front of him, “What’s going on? Why are ya packing everything up?”

Instead of y/n playing with Darcy and Dylan to tire them out before bed, she has them strapped in the stroller and is packing the big diaper bag.

She doesn’t offer an explanation, so he tries again. “Love, the babies aren’t going to bed?”

“They are.”

“But they’re in the stroller.”

“They’re going to bed in the hotel.”

His head whips around to look at his wife. “Huh?”

“Their bassinets aren’t here, so they need to sleep in the hotel.”

Harry’s heart drops to his stomach. The back of his neck goes cold. “I’m so sorry lovie,” he doesn’t know if he should be apologising to his wife or his children. “I’m so sorry. I forgot to pack the bassinets.”

The sound of the zip slices through the thick air. “Hmm. I made sure the hotels have bassinets so they’ll sleep fine.”

“But … but that means you won’t be here for the show. I wanted to get cuddles before I go on.” He is fully aware that he’s in a pathetic state right now, pouting and whining because something hasn’t gone his way.

When y/n just continues to pack silently, he keeps going. “I’m so nervous and I just, I want you to be here, like always. Can they sleep here tonight? I don’t know if I can go on without you waiting for me, without knowing you’re watching me. And, and it’s a really big show tonight.”

“Our children are not sleeping on a sofa or in their strollers, not when there are perfectly good beds in the hotel.” She ditches the stoicism for stern-ness this time.

“That was stupid, I’m sorry. I –“

“- Harry, we need you on standby.”

He sighs, dragging his hands down his face before looking up at the ceiling, trying to stop tears from falling. At least the nervousness is gone.

He doesn’t know what to do.

-

y/n feels sick to her stomach. She knows it’s a little petty to leave the venue without holding him tight and massaging the back of his neck to soothe him, especially since she knows that her husband came to her for comfort.

Harry’s crumpled expression stayed present in her mind as she rocked the babies to sleep. Seeing how stunning he was on stage through the livestream didn’t help to ease her guilt either.

Unfortunately, the urge to coddle him once he comes back quickly dissipated once the music stopped and his words flooded back.

Deciding to keep the cold shoulder, she greets Harry with a tight smile when he sheepishly steps into their hotel room.

“You did good. I’m proud of you.”

With hands clasped behind his back, he stands by the edge of the bed looking at her like a schoolboy awaiting a scolding.

“You watched the show?”

She nods.

“My love, please forgive me. I know I was a dick to you and I promise I’ll never speak to you like that ever again, never disrespect you again. I’m a shitty husband and a shitty dad and,” his voice cracks, “and it sucked not having you there.”

“H, c’mere, please.” Immediately, Harry throws himself onto the bed and crawls into her awaiting arms, nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck, taking in a shaky deep breath. “It’s okay, I forgive you love.”

He shakes his head fiercely. “No, it’s not okay. No one is allowed to speak to you like that. Ever. You’re my wife, you love me the most, and I treated you like shit, like you don’t love and support me.”

“You were very disrespectful, but I know you mean it when you say you’re sorry. I was more upset that you allowed yourself to put your work before the family. You’re Harry Styles, every time you go on stage it’s magic, you didn’t need to spend every minute of last week focused on work.”

Untucking himself from y/n, he leans in to rest his forehead against hers. “I missed them. I promise we’ll have all of tomorrow together and I won’t let any of you out of my sight.”

When she gives him a soft smile, Harry tips his face down to catch her lips in a slow, sweet kiss. Still feeling a little tender, he pouts until y/n agrees to get out of bed to accompany him while he gets ready for bed, sitting on the toilet while he takes a quick shower and sandwiched between his body and the sink when he brushes his teeth.

Despite how exhausted he is from the long day, he doesn’t allow himself to fall asleep, wanting to savour the feeling of being held by the love of his life. When his lids get too heavy, he rests his head on her chest, letting himself get lulled to sleep by her heartbeat.

[justdimaprops]

Tagged by @artemispt Thank you, dear ❤️ It DID feel like a therapy session lol

Rules: color stuff that applies to you and then tag your friends

Appearance:

i'm over 5'5" // i wear glasses/contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing // i have one or more piercings // i have at least one tattoo // i have blue eyes // i have dyed or highlighted my hair // i have gotten plastic surgery // I have had braces // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails // i typically wear make-up // i don't often smile // i am pleased with how i look // i prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backwards.

Hobbies and talents:

i play a sport // i can play an instrument // i am artistic // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks.

Relationship:

i am in a relationship // i have been single for over a year // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend // i met up with someone i have met online.

Aesthetics:

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sun rise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colours // i find mystery in the ocean // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season.

Miscellaneous:

i can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mom friend // i live by a certain quote // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities // i enjoy mexican food // i can drive a stick-shift // i believe in true love // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed // i am multiracial // i am a redhead // i own at least three dogs.

Some of mine depend as well;

i wear baseball hats backwards. Only when I work out or when the sun starts to annoy me on a beach. i can do origami i remember just a couple lol but yeah. i enjoy singing Mostly when I'm alone/in my car or have someone singing with me. i travel during school or work breaks. Mostly to neighboring countries as a road trip but ye. i am involved in extracurricular activities not much when i was in school/during my bachelors (only when my teachers beg me to), but more now during my masters.

Anyone who sees this and wants to do it please feel welcome to do so <3 I loved seeing other people's answers and getting to know y'all better <3

[smokingtiger]

OMG!!! I’m glad that anon talked about that dispatch article. I remember a Vmin account that also claimed that dispatch wrote an article in 2020 that said “95 liners in the same group are dating”. For the many years I have been an army, I haven’t seen or heard of that article anywhere. This made believe that it was one of those theories that shippers create to garner more followers and likes. If you have sometime admin, would you please give your thoughts on the famous Jikook “GCF”. Thanks.

Now I have never heard of the 95-liner one, but honestly, I wouldn't put it past some Vminnies to get hyped up about it. I'll have to personally do some digging on that article, but if it's like the Dispatch screenshot, well... what can we do. Vminnies usually stick to their own lane, so usually, these types of instances are rare for them. You'll get a pass today, vminnies, but only for today &lt;3

Now GCF in Tokyo... I don't really know what to say about it. What happens in Tokyo stays in Tokyo? I remember when it first came out, all of us fans were marveling at the beautiful editing and color grading done by the one and only Jeon Jungkook. Seriously, is there anything this man can't do? I wasn't very active in terms of paying attention to shippers (both believers and creatives) during this time, so I can't really remember what many were saying.

I don't know, when I watched it initially, it wasn't like I was searching for evidence of a romantic relationship, I had only perceived it at face value: Oh cute, Jungkook and Jimin went on a trip together and Jungkook made a surprise little film. And we know it was a surprise because when the link dropped, Jimin had something to say about it. Jimin had already posted his own iterations of the Tokyo trip to Twitter, one of the videos containing one of my favorite Jikook sequences of all time: their Scream-esque costumes.

I know that Jimin and Jungkook had talked about wanting to go on a trip, and I know that after the trip, the two had talked about their time fondly over there. I mean, it seemed like a fun little chance to get away from the working world, to go abroad without a schedule and without bodyguards to enjoy the Tokyo nightlife as normal humans.

What I do find to be incredibly humorous is the fact that if you search for Couple Travel Vlog on YouTube, GCF in Tokyo comes up at number three or five on the suggested results, regardless if you have consumed Bangtan content or not. Usually, YouTube does this based off of the tags attached to the video (because yes, yt videos have hidden tags), but when I went to dissect the tags on the video, there was no mention of couples anywhere. Of course, maybe something in the comments or how YouTube's algorithm works decided to classify it as a couple's vlog. Who fucking knows.

But Tigers, you may ask. How do you know this... did you perhaps do your research? Indeed, young anon, I did.

I feel like many BTS fans, especially when approached with loads of shipping content and seeing people rip their hair out over the smallest interactions... I feel like they get curious to see what all the fuss is about. Usually when I see a shipper talking about a piece of content, usually I go back and review it to see if they have any solid talking points or if it's just nonsense again. Doing research is a good thing, it keeps you level-headed.

But the theories around this video... sigh, there are so many. Some have reasonable ground, but others go right off and jump into the deep end.

Yes, I've heard all about the 11/08 theories. Yes, I've seen the pictures of the hotel that they stayed at. Yes, I know about the bathroom option the hotel offers. Yes, I am aware that there's a button to fog the windows because, yes, this type of mechanic is seen even in Japanese public bathrooms, even if they're not all that common. Yes, I know the hotel was initially marketed as a great place for couples on several travel websites, but so are many places that aren't explicitly for couples. Yes, I know Jungkook used a romantic Troye Sivan song over the video. Yes, Jungkook has used romantic songs in his other GCF videos with all of the other members present (ex: GCF in Osaka used Your Side of the Bed by Loote). Yes, Jungkook tends to mention the Tokyo trip whenever the song comes on, which to be fair, you would too if your own piece of work had over 33M+ views. Yes, I've seen pictures of them in a Japanese jewelry shop purchasing and/or looking at rings? bags? just stuff? As I've stated in the past, I usually don't like to interact with off-schedule photos, but some of them are just unavoidable when the timeline gets their hands on them.

Do I think they were buying wedding rings? No. I don't even think reasonable Jikookers buy that one, either.

Jikookers tend to argue in favor of this being an anniversary or romantic trip because Jungkook is one to hate sightseeing, something that he admittedly made very clear in BTS' Bon Voyage trip to Malta. It's there, it's on tape, it's on camera, backed by many other members too. This type of statement isn't a lie, it can be backed by proof, so at least this claim has a foundation (can't say that for many other things with some of these people). If he hates sightseeing, why did he do it for Jimin?

However, I don't necessarily agree with the idea that, just because he said it once, it always must be true. I don't really like vacations either, I'm a big homebody, but going out every once in a while, especially when there's no schedule, I tend to appreciate a good relaxing trip. Admittedly, Malta came after GCF in Tokyo, but Jungkook has always had that sort of introverted type of nature. Also, Jimin said that Jungkook had initiated some of the shopping activities on their Tokyo trip

But you're asking for my thoughts, not Jikookers... and to be completely honest... I really don't know how to feel. There are a few Bangtan instances that make me side-eye them a little, and GCF in Tokyo is one of them. Does that mean I think their relationship is real? No. Is it definitely an interesting piece of work? Totally.

But to be fair, Jimin had talked to both Taehyung AND Jungkook about wanting to go on a trip to Japan, whether individually or together. (180320 ViVi May Issue – To Seasonal Date Spots with BTS J-HOPE JIMIN V) Jimin says “I’ve always said to him and V that I wanted to go to Japan for a private trip. Then JUNGKOOK and I just happened to have time off together.

However, in a FanCafe post, Jimin talks about planning to go to Tokyo with Jungkook and the two working together closely to line up their schedules. Jungkook is the one who bought the tickets!

Obviously, that trip meant so much to both of them. For years after the trip, Jimin especially spoke very fondly about his memories there. If he's happy, then I'm happy. Who am I to deny the happiness of the legend who wrote Like Crazy?

Whether or not people interpret this video as romantic, I really don't care. If Jikookers want to come into the comments of this ask and talk about why it's true, you can do that. I'll actually encourage it. I don't mind and I like hearing everyone's opinions, I'd just prefer some proof and backing apart from general speculations.

I think at the end of the day we can all agree that Jimin and Jungkook are incredibly close... I speak/understand a decent amount of Korean (it's my major baybeee) and Jungkook tends to drop honorifics when speaking to Jimin. Of course, in public situations, schedules, or interviews, he's still incredibly polite -- but on personal phone calls or Bangtan Bombs where the footage is more candid, he tends to drop them. Is that 100% indicative of a romantic relationship? No. Does that say a lot about how close he and Jimin are? Absolutely. That's why it breaks my heart so much when people squawk and scream about the contrary.

But anyways, go watch GCF in Tokyo because Jungkook worked so hard on it <3 We haven't gotten a GCF in a while, but I hope Jungkook hasn't hung up these videos for good. It was nice to see the world from his point of view.

edit: Jimin is so fucking cute here I want to EAT him.

edit 2: like I said, out of the 'sussiest' material that BTS has released, this is like, in the top 5. Also my paragraph with all the italicized yes' was not meant to be dismissive of evidence, but rather to provide an opposing point of view. many of these points are incredibly compelling, but there's always a flipside to a coin, ya know? I don't want to seem as if I'm being too harsh on those who are attempting to make a valid argument!

Again, if you're a Jikooker who thinks it's romantic, that's totally valid, I'm not making this post to call anyone wrong or whatever, it's just my mixed feelings about a piece of media.

[findstenicht]

15 questions for 5 mutuals

Rule: You have to answer truthfully and you have to tag 5 mutuals in your post.

I was tagged by @apoloniaspiegelgold, thank you!! <3

1. Are you named after anyone?

nope! although my dad used to claim that i was named after some slavic actress/model/wife-of-Some-Guy whose name i always forget

2. When was the last time you cried? Why?

the weekend before the last, just your average sunday afternoon mental breakdown

3. Do you believe in Soulmates? 

sort of, but also not really? i do believe that there are certain people who are supposed to be in your life at certain times but that doesnt necessarily mean "forever"

4. Do you drink liquor? 

rarely - im not opposed to it, i just dont often do things where there's alcohol involved

5. What do you usually daydream about?

listen. i have a very specific daydream universe that i always come back to but. you know how you sometimes read a story and can pretty much guess what's wrong with the author? describing my daydreams would be like that except you wouldnt have to guess at all, it'd be the most on-the-nose thing you've ever seen. might as well just post a list of everything that ever went wrong in my life and it'd be less embarrassing

6. First thing you notice about other people?

their voice!! (i mean obviously lots of times you see people before you hear them, but i dont really notice anything more specific than a general impression about appearances at first glance, yk?)

7. What's your favorite quote from a TV show/movie/book?

does a poem count? cause the only thing i can think of is "Es gibt keine Schuld. Es gibt nur den Ablauf der Zeit." from tucholsky's poem aus, which i havent stopped thinking about since i read it nine years ago (and for which i still havent found an english translation, sorry!)

8. Some of your pet peeves?

absolutely hate when people overexplain stuff to me that i know, that you could reasonably assume i know, and that i've told you i know. i know a lot of times people mean well (which is why i wont get actively mad at anyone), but if i already told you i know about something, you really dont have to explain it to me like it's brand new information. (looking at all the guys who heard about my field of study and then went on to describe the most basic sociological concepts to me)

9. Where’s the next place on your travel bucket list and why?

ireland!! i have no specific plans but i've wanted to go to ireland ever since i was a kid and saw the photos my parents took on their trip to ireland in the 90s

10. Where were you born? 

in a small town in northern germany :)

11. What are your hobbies?

nothing exciting tbh - video games, talking to friends, going for walks, and writing (<- i say, barely having written anything in months)

12. What's the best joke you've ever heard?

bold of you to assume i can remember jokes

13. What’s your love language? 

words of affirmation all the way - if i love you in any way, you will hear about it. thats both a threat and a promise.

14. Topics you never get tired of to talk about.

dragon age, what i'd vaguely describe as online media literacy, and social movements (especially far right movements, which i know sounds weird, but for some reason the FR became my main academic interest)

15. What would be the title if your life were a movie? 

not sure if it'd actually fit, but a couple years ago i scribbled down the phrase "the grand stupidity of the general state of things" and ive just been waiting to use that as a title for anything ever since; so yeah sure, why not, title for a movie about my life!

also im gonna cheat here and only tag @78669 (only if you want to ofc!!) bc i love my mutuals but never talk to them and i dont want to annoy them :( (obviously everyone feel free to just consider themselves tagged, if you want to do this!)

[cutestkilla]

Get To Know Me Tag Game

Okay, this seems fun, thanks for tagging me @captain-aralias!

Relationship Status: I’ve been with my partner for 21 years this summer, but we are not legally married. Technically, we’re engaged because he gave me a ring 11 years ago, but we’ve never actually tied the knot because I really, really, really do not enjoy the idea of having a wedding and he’s not that into it either. Getting up in front of an audience and professing my feelings is just extremely unappealing to me, not that I object to watching other people do it; I think it’s lovely. We sort of looked into doing something small but then my mom started getting really excited and listing off every distant cousin she wanted us to invite and I just… let it not happen.  So, we just had a couple of kids instead (and when I call them little bastards, it's literally true).

Favourite Colour: Teal, hands down. Not necessarily to wear (though I do like to wear it) but every room in my house (apart from the kids’ rooms) has some kind of teal accent in it.  Blue in general is my favourite, but teal in particular, maybe because it reminds me of the ocean.

Favourite Food: Really not sure how to answer this one… I’m more of a practical eater than someone who really savours food. Whatever it is, it has to have cheese on it, though. Mac and cheese maybe? Four-cheese panini? I’m also a chocoholic so anything with chocolate counts too. Chocolate cheescake?

Song Stuck in Your Head: ‘Love Like a Sunset, Pt. 2’ by Phoenix, because my son wanted to do a dance in front of the sunset (we’re up at a cottage rental on a lake this weekend and the sunsets are glorious) and since this song is about sunsets I played it for him the past two evenings.

Last Thing You Googled: 'feist my moon my man video' because I referenced it in a comment I just wrote to @aristocratic-otter in which we were discussing recreational enjoyment of moving walkways at airports. (Consider this a tag in, Pati, if you feel like playing!)

Time: 9:55 AM (when I was at this question, anyway)

Dream Trip: Weirdly, this isn’t something I really think much about. I love to travel, but I usually just tag along with other people on their dream trips, and travelling with a 3-year-old and 7-year-old isn’t super appealing right now. I would really like to go to southeast Asia, though. Probably we’ll go down to Anguilla in the spring which is just a gorgeous island in the Caribbean, because my parents are renting a villa there for a few months and have invited us to join them for a week or two.

Last Book You Read: I finished Boyfriend Material by Alexis Hall a few weeks ago, and had briefly paused reading the second book in the Dreamer Trilogy (Mister Impossible) to do that, and also just finished that. Both were really enjoyable in totally different ways, and I am ready for Husband Material to come out this week! In the meantime, I started The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern which I’m also really being drawn in to (although the audio book performance is not really the greatest).

Last Book You Enjoyed Reading: I rarely don’t enjoy reading something, honestly, so all of the above!

Last Book You Hated Reading: I really never hate the experience of reading anything, I always get something out of it, even if I think the book, or the writing itself could be better. I will say that finishing the latest book in the Outlander series (Go Tell the Bees That I Have Gone) was a bit of a chore. It was incredibly long and very little happened, and I probably only finished it because of Davina Porter’s great audiobook performance.

Favourite Thing to Cook/Bake: My partner is definitely the chef in our house (lucky me!), so I don’t do much cooking. Cooking-wise, probably my favourite thing to make is a really gooey and buttery grilled cheese. I probably like baking better, because I have a huge sweet tooth, and when it comes to that, chewy chocolate chip cookies are king.

Favourite Craft to do in Your Free Time: I’m not super crafty, but when I do work with my hands, it’s usually on home repair/reno stuff. I was really proud of when I pulled apart the hundred-year-old sash windows on my house and replaced the glass, reglazed and insulated a few of them, but it’s been quite a few years since I had time for an involved project like that.

Most Niche Dislikes: I am struggling with this one… I think most of my dislikes are pretty common and I’m generally an easygoing person. I really don’t like strawberry jam or cooked strawberry in any form, even though I love fresh strawberries. Same goes for grape jelly, it sickens me for some reason, but I love grapes. But is that niche?

A truly niche thing I have hated in life is being the team captain for my fastpitch team and having people beg me to run early morning weekend practices only for nobody to show up, over and over. And over. But I feel like anyone rational who experienced this would also hate it. (I have since quit the team!)

Opinion on Circuses, Now and in History: I mean, the original circuses were essentially bloodsport arenas where people paid to watch other humans and animals suffering, right? So, I’m pretty firmly against those. And now… I just think they’re probably pretty cruel to animals and I would never go to one. I went as a kid and I don’t remember it being that much fun anyway.

Cirque du Soleil on the other hand is lots of fun, and I did go see their Cavalia show which features horse dancing and was amazing (seriously, I highly recommend it if it still runs anywhere, it was magical). It feels a bit different, because the animals involved are a domesticated species that has co-evolved with humans for thousands of years and according to my research they train the horses in a cruelty-free way just the same way a horse would be trained for something like dressage and everything is done in a very natural way.

I even hesitate to take my kids to the zoo, for the same reason, even though the zoo in my city is world class and they definitely do their best to make things good for the animals. But keeping a wild animal in captivity just doesn’t seem right to me, even if it’s supposedly the only option because we destroyed their natural habitat… (What if we tried to fix that instead?) But also our whole society is built on subjugation so it’s kind of hard to feel like I have the moral high ground in any way because of this choice, especially since I literally helped my kid capture a bunch of bugs yesterday (we did catch and release, though).

Do you have a sense of direction, and if not what if the worst way you’ve gotten lost: I have a great sense of direction and spatial awareness, I would say. I rarely get lost and I’m usually pretty good at just looking at a map once and knowing my way from there.

The one time I really did get turned around was the night I arrived on my trip to Tokyo; I had mapped it all out in advance and saved the map to my phone to avoid using data, but we got lost inside Shinjuku station (which is quite large), trying to figure our way out the correct exit to walk to our hotel. It was under construction and being indoors with no real landmarks we ended up rolling our suitcases around for almost an hour before finally getting out, and it was raining when we did.

I will tag in a few folks that aralias didn’t tag on her post in case they want to play: @artsyunderstudy @raenestee @fatalfangirl @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @gekkoinapeartree @forabeatofadrum @creepyspice

[miasanmuller]

I was tagged by on this one by @acrazybayernfan and really liked the idea so here we are now :) Thanks a lot for tagging me Lise!!

tea, coffee, or soda? Coffee runs in my veins in a probably unhealthy manner. But I like tea too lmao

dogs or cats? I used to be a dog person until I adopted a cat, which promptly turned me into a cat person. I love dogs, I love to pet other people’s dogs, but I can’t see myself having one now. Idk cats bring a completely different kind of entertainment that I love lol

can you play an instrument? Nope, not even sing (which obviously does not stop me from trying).

what’s your sign? Pisces

first song lyrics that pops into your head? I’m free to be the greatest, I’m alive / I’m free to be the greatest here tonight

do you have any tattoos? Nope

favourite place you’ve travelled? Hmm I don’t think it’s a favorite place but it’s a favorite trip: to Cuiabá in 2018 to take part in a congress. I went with my boyfriend and it was super fun (not the congress lmao that part sucked a lot) but we went to a lot of fun places and idk it was cool and we got to spend a lot of quality time together. I wish we could make another trip like that.

what’s the last movie you’ve watched? I think it’s I Know What You Did Last Summer LMAO. For context me and a couple friends get together on Discord to watch movies from time to time so we can chat and talk shit during the movie, and we tend to chose 90-early 2000s rom-coms or classic horror, and this one kinda fits into both so it was an obvious choice lol. Now I’m trying to get them to watch Close Encounters of the Third Kind this weekend.

do you have any hobbies? Listening to music and singing along, going for walks, talking to myself, playing video games, reading Wikipedia articles and then completely forgetting about them, drawing, writing, cooking, baking and unfortunately watching football.

what languages do you speak? I can actually speak Portuguese, English and Spanish and I like to believe I can speak German like a... 6 year old. But it’s probably worse than that. Also a bit of Italian but I’m still learning.

you can hang out with one fictional character for an hour, who do you choose? Oh this is really difficult hmmmm idk maybe Jon Snow from ASOIAF so I could personally push him over the Wall and get myself rid of that prick permanently

compliment yourself! Omg Ander you’re so funny

As usual I never know who to tag so... I’m tagging @ysommer @shrimpeon @colorsofmyseason @smilesleepandspeak and @de-ligts but yall are free to completely ignored this if you will x)

[feijoaaas]

okay i’m probably entirely too exhausted to be writing this rn and even more exhausted for the possible barrage of replies this is gonna get but whatever

my dash has been made aware of the air time of people with private jets and even though there’s ten listed people in the article nobody is mentioning anyone but taylor, and then the memes started as well

and i have not seen one post with critical thinking, i’ve only seen posts where taylor is called literally evil. as if? she jumped into her private jet with the knowledge of how much it pollutes and she went “heheh i’m gonna pollute so much right now more than anyone else but who cares, taking the car takes too long hehehe i’m so evil” ??? like really is this what you think happened?

and no i’m not defending private jet usage but it is seriously gross that she is receiving the blunt end of this. is it because she actually has an account on here, like y’all hope that if you make enough angry posts about it you’ll guilt trip her (in frankly a pretty gross way because like, we all know she uses tumblr but yet nobody had the guts to actually tag her in a post and write in a well mannered way, it’s like hearing the mean kids talk about you in school while you’re just on the other side of the door) into stopping?

and while we’re on the subject of flying, which we know pollutes terribly, why is one woman being singled out when there’s roughly 20 million flights a year worldwide which equals some 50,000 flights per day! and your average flight takes some 200 passengers at least.

that means there’s 10 million people in the air every day. you think all those people have valid reasons to be flying somewhere? aren’t most of all air travels for leisure? and those that are for business have already been proven by covid to be unnecessary for the most part since companies can do video meetings from different cities and there’s no need for a business suit to fly halfway cross a country just to sit in a meeting for a couple hours

why is taylor being the only person singled out??? where was all this rage when bezos, musk and branson competed against each other to be the first of them in space, and them building space ships for “space tourism” because rich people have too much money and they’ve run out of things to do on this planet

where was all this rage when the U.N. told elon musk how he could end world hunger with a 6 billion dollar donation, and he ghosted them? but then he made a 44 billion DOLLARS bid to buy twitter (and for no good reason? like because he was sick of the memes or as distraction from the news of how he and his co-worker were about to have a kid, just weeks apart from when his kids with grimes were due??) and yet nobody boycotted twitter or elon or tesla and amazon is still doing well financially even though we’ve known for ages it is garbage

like i just wanna know if you’re as quick to judge your friends and family who take the plane to go on vacations here and there and everywhere, or your friends who still shop from amazon or watch amazon prime or have just loaded up a new subscription to watch rings of power, or quick to judge your friends who immediately watch the new marvel content and movies even though disney has too much money and too much power and are obliterating independent studios

are you boycotting coca cola and pepsi and nestle and are you buying fair trade and are you buying your clothes second hand or making them yourself because the clothing industry is the biggest polluter of them all ? are ya?

this cancel culture quick to blame not a second for critical thought is really fucking tiresome

are private jets excessive and dumb? yeah.

is saying taylor swift is literally evil, very black and white and dumb? imo yeah. there’s plenty of far richer people out there making far worse pollution footprints. does that excuse her. no. but is she single-handedly destroying the planet as the article made it sound? doubtful.

oh and hey look, something that wasn’t in the article when it was making the rounds a couple days ago:

if i had money to bet, i would’ve bet that this wouldn’t be making half as big an impact on here if it were some random rich guy we’ve never heard of who was in the top 1 spot.

and that’s why i made this post.

[generalcircus]

Idiot Couple Buys Fake "Suncream” And Proceed To Get Their Asses Kicked By Mother Earth’s Sun

A couple recently took to the inner webs to warn fellow travelers about the dangers of buying fake “suncream” while on a trip to Thailand. Apparently the co-ed dumb and dumber tik tok tag team were enjoying their sun filled getaway until they bought what they thought was “suncream”, only to realize hours later that while it may have been white, something wasn’t quite right. So they did what any responsible retards would do and posted their horror story along with a video to social media, warning other idiots and hopefully getting a ton of sympathy for being left “blistered and burnt” in the process. 

Ok first of all this is clearly their first rodeo with sunburns, because you could get a worse burn from tanning under a full moon. The dude’s maroon shorts are more red than that pansy ass “burn” they both took to social media to bitch about. 

Second, who the fuck calls it “suncream”??? Maybe that’s your first problem here. Cream?!? Yeah you bought cream alright. Only it probably came from some dude’s std ridden penis. And that’s where the “blisters” came from because they sure as hell didn’t cum from that light shade of kinda red they called a burn. 

How does that saying go? Young, dumb, and covered in cum? 

P.S. Yes I know I used the word “retards”. I’m not referring to mentally challenged people though, their mom’s know the difference between real and fake sunSCREEN. 

[theclassycandy]

Hello hello hello!! I have a request for Beckett and a female s/o when they contact each other while one is on a trip? Like their texts, calls, etc.

(I'm experiencing something like this irl, he's on a trip and I'm at home haha)

Hope you're doing well! <3

Thank you so much for writing to me! At the time of writing this, I'm on a little vacation myself hehe. I'm doing well and I hope you enjoy these headcanons!

fem!mc on a business trip and Beckett communicating  

Beckett's fem!s/o is on a business trip to gain international partners for her brand and to understand the culture if the meetings go well!

He demands for her to video chat with him at least twice a day; when she wakes up and right before she goes to bed

He's honestly immensely proud of her that she's expanding her travels and he wishes that he could've gone there with her

Her texts and calls make his day too

You absolutely see how much this boi's face lights up when they're communicating with each other online

He had such a big smile on his face when she’s showing him a tour of her hotel room 

“Oh my god Beckett! Look at how big the bed is! It’s my first time in a penthouse suite- wait! Oh god, look at the massive bathtub! I know you’ve probably been in fancy hotels like your entire life but it’s so new for me!”

She’s so fucking adorable with a huge smile on her face with the expression of genuine excitement

And he can only smile at how pretty his girlfriend is, even with blurry camera work

They also text each other right before the meeting and it’s like 1 am for Beckett 

fem!s/o: I’m legit scared shitless, what if I fuck it up? Or somehow insult them?

Beckett <3: You’ll do amazing, I’m sure of it. Your charisma, wit and intelligence are unmatched. You got this, I only wish I could see do ace it in person.

fem!s/o: That’s the pep talk i needed, thanks babe! I love you and wish me luck!

Beckett <3: I love you too, more than anything. But I won’t wish you luck because you don’t need it, you’ll get it.

fem!s/o: You stroke my ego too much and I love it. Wait I have to go now, bye!

Beckett <3: Bye! You’ll do amazing, my love

With no surprise to Beckett, his girlfriend does incredible with her designs and business strategies and she gained a new partner for her company!

*On a laptop video call* “Holy shit, I did it! I can’t believe I actually now have an international partner! Do you know how much this could expand the brand?” his gf says excitedly

Beckett himself is grinning widely and excitedly talking back and even when she’s all the way on the other side of the globe, he’s extremely proud of her

Especially when he thinks of how big her smile is when she’s talking about her meetings, her works and her ambitions for her career in the coming future

On her last day there, as the day starts he tells her to relax and do whatever she wants. She’s more than earned it. Besides, she’s going to be very busy once she gets home, with her new, worldwide associates.

That night she describes all the spa treatments and facials she did and how it was the perfect end to a successful business trip 

She also showed him the luxury jewelry and designer professional wear that she bought from the designers and curators themselves!

She does this by modeling and trying on the clothes and accessories in front of him

(He blushes when she undresses in front of him, even during their video calls when she tries on the clothes) *cough cough*

She looks amazing and is the embodiment of opulence and beauty with all of it on. She has astounding fashion sense.

“Is this what it’s like to be part of the elite in the magickal world, Beckett? People eager to work with you, become associated with you?” she asks, new to what it’s like being increasingly wealthy. 

“Yeah, but you’ll get used to it. I have a feeling you were always destined to be spectacular. You deserve this.” he says genuinely

She laughs it off but Beckett really does believe everything he says.

When she arrives home from the airport, she runs to him, he picks her up and spins her around; the young couple overjoyed to be reunited!

Tags- @itsjustwinter @bri1234 @zombipickachu @miss-smrxtiee @herarmoredheart @adam-dumortains  @mortemersgf @holystxne  @callmehopeless  @mm2305  @ilikeyellingatmyscreen

[cosmiclatte28]

LOST (Hendery)

Net @supermwritersnet for collab Around the World in 31 Days

"So where are we headed today, love?" The man in pink hair speaks to the camera while asking you who is sitting next to him in the waiting room. You look up from your phone and smile at the camera "We're taking the long flight to Oslo, Norway!"

Hendery nods and takes you into his arms. "We'll be having our first trip as an official couple." He grins and you nod, what's special about that come on… both of you had done a lot of trips together since college.

"That's it for now, we'll cut you to the video when we make it to Oslo. Bye!" Hendery waves and closes his camera lense. Oh yes your legal partner here runs a travel video log and inside he will tell his viewers about a trip, starting from which plane offers the best route, what to expect and bring. He also does the itinerary and tells tips and tricks on how to maximize your holiday experience. You and Hendery have been to a lot of road trips and countless memories. He has them all recorded on the camera and that makes your holiday even more cherishable.

--

“We’re finally here!” Hendery greets the camera back in a thick jacket and you’re holding a warm chocolate drink in your hands.

You just nod at the camera, trying to warm your body from the cold air.

“It’s a long flight but we’re finally here! Our first stop is the hotel.”

You just open your map, trying to find the bus to the hotel but if you give up a taxi ride will be good.

You’re glad you both end up in the right place, not in another part of the city where none of you speak the language.

As the two of you finish checking in and resting in the big room. Well for two nights both of you are staying at the nice hotel because Hendery wants to treat you for your first wedding anniversary.

“Do you actually have a plan for this trip vlog already?” you ask Hendery after changing your clothes to a clean and fresh one while laying down on the big bed.

Hendery nods, taking out his tab and begins to open his document to recheck his plan for the video.

“Are you going to vlog the room? I am sorry I ruined the bed already.” you run your hand over the sheet trying to smoothen it out.

Hendery laughs and picks up his camera “It’s okay, stay there, I’ll take video of the other rooms. Some viewers want me to review a good hotel recommendation and I think this is nice,” Hendery begins exiting the door and you know your queue to be quiet. You see your husband entering the door and talking to the camera while showing some spaces here and there. You just sit on the bed, waving when he shows the viewers you and the bed. You don’t speak a lot in his vlogs, letting him do his hobby while you just enjoy your time here.

He ends the video and then rushes to change his clothes and finally lay down beside you.

“I am also tired. It’s almost dinner time, should we get something?” He offers you a restaurant that locals say is good and you just nod.

After both of you dress up and get ready, two of you take the public transport to reach the restaurant.

“We stop here, and take a 20 minutes walk.” He knows you’re okay with walking but you begin to doubt his maps when the path you two take starts to look dark and wrong.

“I guess we could just go back,” you hold on to his hand tighter, somewhat the air feels colder and you don’t see any more houses or roads here.

“Hmm but the map shows we’re close to the place and that local reviews are high for this place.” He still does what he always does, is stubborn and goes for the goal.

“It’s going to be great content!” he rambles on how he will make the story about how we get lost and then find the best restaurant.

You just sigh, tighten the coat you wore and walk with him through the wilderness path.

“Do you have the signal?” you raise your brow when you notice this is getting out of control.

He smiles “I lost it, but trust my instinct. I see a light there, maybe that’s the place.”

You seriously don’t know how both of you end up lost in the wilderness. You remember the bus stopping next to a bus stop, then both of you walk while talking and like having fun and suddenly there’s no more road and now here you two are.

You are busy watching your steps when Hendery suddenly hug you and scream

“What?!” you are ready to fight any wild animals jumping into sight but Hendery just pushes your head to see a small hut with outdoor seating and there’s some people there.

“Oh we made it.” you sound relieved but Hendery smacked your head

“READ THAT!” he points and you squint your eyes “I can’t read it, it’s in Norwegian.”

Hendery rolls his eyes “Outdoor sitting restaurant with Aurora view!”

Now you scream, because you choose to tag along to this trip also because you want to see the northern lights

“Told you we’re not lost!” Hendery kisses your cheek quickly. You turn red “Alright, we’re not lost, we just took the wrong path i guess.”

Hendery nods “If we use a car, we use that path, but we walked so it’s yeah silly.” he drags your hand to order something from the hut.

You don’t know anything and let Hendery order. He’s good with his broken Norwegian but look you already pick a table and your husband is back with a tray of foods and wine.

“She said the Aurora can be seen at any clear night and tonight is one of those night.” Hendery explains while pouring you a glass of wine.

There as you two make the video content, Hendery sharing his loss experience and you just sip on your wine, warming your body down.

“Made great content huh?” you ask as you lean into his shoulder when you begin to see the magical northern lights in the sky.

Hendery sighs and wraps a hand over your shoulder “I am never lost when I am with you, also you know how we always stick to a goal in life. See, the hard work of getting here is paid!” he kisses the top of your head while gazing at the magnificent green lights in the air.

“I am glad we found this place, the regular spotting place will be filled with tourists I am sure.'' He sounds proud as if he found you a more private place to watch the Aurora (which he did, judging by how only 10 couples are here).

“I love you” you kiss his cheek and Hendery laughs “Suddenly?”

You giggle and he smells the wine from your lips. “Ah, I know why.” He pulls you closer to his side and you lean your head on his shoulder.

“Thanks for finding this place, It’s very beautiful.” you whisper

Hendery just nod “Anything to bring a smile to your face!”

[snelbz]

The Ranch {7}

An A Court of Thorns and Roses, Nesta x Cassian, Modern AU, fanfiction.

Collaboration: @throne-of-ashes-and-beauty​ x @tacmc​

Summary: Nesta had spent years in Paris, living her dream and drowning in riches as a gourmet chef, capturing the hearts of the city and its people. But, after her father passes away unexpectedly and leaves his cozy, countryside B&B to his oldest daughter, Nesta is moving back home to the tiny town of Velaris, where the ranch, her sisters, and her father’s unfulfilled dream, awaits.

Sidenote: Being posted between two blogs, it is too chaotic to keep up with a tags list, so all chapters will be tagged with “#TheRanchNessian” & “#SharaCollab”.

A/N: We are absolutely blown away by how much y’all enjoy this story. We’ve loved writing it for you and we get just as excited for a new chapter as y’all do! Enjoy. xx

The Ranch Masterlist

Nesta hated going to school.

She felt so overwhelmed, so crowded, so completely lost in the sea of people that filled the halls of Velaris High School. Elain and Feyre had always found their place within those halls fairly quickly, absolutely, but Nesta floated. She went from one class to the next, sticking her nose in a book every chance she got. She didn’t make friends. Didn’t have acquaintances.

She did have one go-to, but he didn’t go to VHS. He was in the next town over. 

Tomas Mandray.

As soon as she sat down at her desk in algebra, she pulled out her phone. She had three missed messages.

10:31 - Hey. I’m planning on picking you up later. 

10:42 - We could stay in, if you want. (;

10:56 - I’ll be out of town this weekend, so spend time with me now.

At first, Nesta almost didn’t reply, but then she typed back, I’ll be ready at 7.

She hated that she loved Tomas Mandray. 

———

At seven o’clock on the dot, there was a knock on the front door of the house.

“That's Tomas, I’ll be home later!” Nesta hollered, trying to get out of the house before her father could drag her boyfriend into another conversation about the merits of a lightweight rope versus one with more snap.

“Hold on just a minute!” Isaac called, coming from the kitchen. “That boy is headed to Guthrie this weekend.” Nesta groaned as she pulled open the door and her father practically yanked him through the threshold. “You planning on bringing home a buckle?”

“Yes, sir,” Tomas smiled, shaking his hand. “Always.”

Isaac nodded and said, “Damn straight, I remember my trip to the National Championship, granted, I rode Broncs, mind you, but-.”

“Dad, we have to go. We have reservations,” Nesta coolly lied. “I’ll be home around 10:30.”

Her father waved her comments off. “Nah, don’t worry about a curfew tonight.” He rested his hands on Tomas’ shoulders. “It’s not everyday your future son-in-law makes it to the National Junior Rodeo Championship.”

Nesta’s cheeks burned. “Right. Well, we really have to go.”

She was hurrying out the door, dragging Tomas by the hand as she did so.

“Good to see you, Mr. Archeron!” Tomas called, as Nesta shut the front door behind them. “I like talking to your dad.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t,” Nesta said. She hated when Isaac talked to Tomas. He was so certain that he and Nesta would be together forever, and the thought often made her sick to her stomach yet hopeful at the same time. It was a strange combination. 

She climbed up into the passenger side of Tomas’s truck and leaned back as he took off. 

“I missed you.”

Nesta nodded. “You, too.”

He reached across the middle of the seat and took her hand. “So, will you be coming to watch me this weekend? It’s the National-”

“-Junior Rodeo Championship, yeah, I know,” she finished.

“Damn, what’s stuck up your ass?” he muttered.

“Nothing,” Nesta sighed. “I wish we could, but dad says we have two couples staying the whole weekend.”

As much as she hated to admit it, she was almost relieved when her father told her that a group of friends had booked the weekend last minute. The last thing she wanted to deal were the buckle bunnies in training that followed the rodeos around. She wouldn’t have to deal with the cheap beer and the greasy food and tobacco spit and the blood and sweat and (usually) tears.

His thumb rubbed a circle into the back of her hand. “Well, maybe just you could come. You could leave with me after lunch tomorrow. You know your dad would sign you out.”

She shook her head. “I can’t, they need me to cook for the guests.”

It was true. No one else in the house had an ounce of culinary ability, and it just so happened to be Nesta’s favorite thing in the world.

Tomas frowned. “No one else can cook for the guests?”

Nesta shook her head. “None as good as me. Besides, I love cooking.”

“Cooking is a stupid thing to love,” Tomas said, and Nesta stilled. “Why cook when you can come watch me win a national title?” 

She didn’t answer. She didn’t have an answer that would please him. 

“Besides, after we graduate, you’ll be coming with me on the road all the time,” he went on. “May as well get used to it now.”

“I’m not sure I want to go on the road all the time,” Nesta said. “You know it’s my dream to open my own restaurant, I can’t really do that if I’m travelling with you.”

Tomas shook his head, laughing quietly. “Come on, Nes.”

“Come on, what?” She asked, turning to look at him. “It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do. Is my dream not as important as yours?”

“Of course not, that’s not what I’m trying to say, babe. It’s just,” he reached over and skimmed his knuckles across her cheekbone. “If you stay here and open a restaurant, and I go pro, we’re never going to see each other.” They came to a stop at a red light. He turned to her. “I love you. Don’t you love me?”

Her eyebrows furrowed. “Of course, I do.”

“Then you need to come with me. So we can be together. Promise me you’ll think about it.”

Nesta only nodded, agreeing that yes, she would think about it, but she already knew it wouldn’t happen. She wasn’t made for the rodeo life.

Just like her mother hadn’t been.

It was because of her mother that they even had the ranch, because she loved Nesta’s father, but didn’t love the city to city, night to night lifestyle he lived in the professional rodeo circuit. So after they got married, and Nesta was on her way, her mother had convinced Isaac to hang up his ropes and buy the ranch. And he’d loved it.

And it worked for them, Nesta’s parents. Isaac found his love in ranching, they got to be together and raise their girls. But Tomas would never be that. He was too hard headed, too stuck in the rodeo life. He loved it, and Nesta had to admire that, but she didn’t have to give up her dreams for that admiration. 

She was going to become a chef.

She was going to stay put, in the city, or maybe go somewhere like Paris or Barcelona or Tokyo. All she knew was that the last place she wanted to be was stuck in a truck, driving from city to city for the fucking rodeo.

She just didn’t know how to tell Tomas that, because Tomas never accepted an answer that wasn’t the one he wanted to hear.

Nesta was so caught up in her own thoughts that it took her nearly fifteen minutes to realize they weren’t on the way to the restaurant. But it took her only a few seconds later to realize where they were going. “Tomas, please, not tonight. We can’t have one night without it?”

He gestured to the arena. “It’s a round robin, babe. I’ll run eight head max and walk out of here seven hundred dollars richer.” Nesta only rolled her eyes and looked out the window. He went on, “Plus, I heard from Beron there will be sponsors here tonight. Granted, they’re here for some big headed jock from VHS, but once they see me, he won’t matter.”

Nesta stopped listening, but subconsciously, she knew that Tomas talked until they parked.

“You don’t even have your horse,” she said, as a last ditch effort. She knew this fact hadn’t somehow escaped him, but she didn’t understand what he was hoping to accomplish by being here without Rain.

“Oh, I’m buying one,” he laughed, as if that was such a minor thing to forget. “Yeah, that’s the whole reason we’re here. So, I can test out this horse. If she’s got some crack to her, I’m not putting a national championship on the line.”

Nesta couldn’t believe him. He’d taken their last night home together and hijacked it.

Pulling into the dirt lot, Nesta breathed a heavy sigh. Tomas hopped out of the truck and reached into the backseat, grabbing a beer out of the cooler and popping the top. She laughed  incredulously. “Are you serious?”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you something, too,” he smirked, lifting the wine coolers out of the ice. She rolled her eyes. It wasn’t that she was looking to drink, too. It was that, once again, she’d been overshadowed by roping. “Come on, I gotta go warm that horse up.”

“I’ll be right there,” Nesta said, pulling her phone out of her pocket and dialing her sister’s number. “I need to ask Elain something real quick.”

“Alright, well, hurry up,” he said, smacking the roof of the truck. “I want you to get some video of me I can post.”

Grinding her teeth, she nodded, and put the phone to her ear. Tomas shut the door and Nesta lowered the phone back to her lap, never even having pressed the call button. She looked out the truck window, out over the fields, that rolled on and on, and just saw...nothingness.

Without thinking about it, Nesta hopped out of the truck, threw her purse over her shoulder and began walking towards the road.

The rustic back roads of Velaris weren’t lit with street lamps, so she pulled her phone out and used it as a flashlight. After about fifteen minutes of walking, her phone died and she was left in the dark.

An older truck, heading in the direction of the arena, stopped when they saw her walking along the side of the road. An unfamiliar voice called out, “Hey, are you okay?”

She didn’t answer.

“Miss? Do you need a ride?”

She kept walking and ignored the  truck, passing it and disappearing into the darkness.

———— 

At quarter after midnight, Nesta finally walked up the worn wooden steps of the ranch house. Her phone had been dead for hours and by the time she reached the city, she knew her family would be asleep.

She wondered if Tomas had noticed her absence. She wondered if he’d tried to call her.

She unlocked the front door and crept in, trying to miss the creaking board by the living room doorway.

“That you, Nes?”

She sighed, hoping he wouldn’t come into the foyer, where she stood with one door already on the first step. “Yeah, dad.”

He groaned as he sat up on the couch. “Tomas with you?”

She swallowed heavily. “No, sir.” She started to ascend the steps. She looked like shit, he couldn’t see her like this, covered in dust and who knows what else. She didn’t want to tell him what happened, didn’t want to deal with him telling her that Tomas was the best thing to ever happen to her. “I’m tired. I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”

She hurried up the stairs and shut her door with a soft click.

Begging herself not to cry, she slipped off her clothes and slipped into a cozy pair of sweatpants and a tank top. She should take a shower, but she didn’t want to wake her sisters by turning it on. So, instead, she trudged across the hall, into the bathroom, and wiped herself off with a wet cloth.

All she had wanted was one thing: to go to a nice dinner with her boyfriend. Instead, she was left alone for the night in a place that she hated, expected to cheer Tomas on in a sport, in an environment, she couldn’t care less for. 

And Tomas didn’t even seem to care or notice. At least now she would get a weekend alone, a weekend spent in the kitchen, a weekend creating dishes that people would praise her for. And it wasn’t that Nesta needed the praise, but when her world revolved around Tomas’s accomplishments, it was nice to be the one appreciated for once.

When her phone finally booted up, she didn’t have a single text from Tomas.

—————

Friday went by pretty uneventfully. She was exhausted, yes, but she was mostly distracted by the fact that Tomas hadn’t responded to her text message that morning.

She had bumped into someone in the halls, between economics and chemistry, and after she’d apologized, he’d stopped her and asked if she was alright. His hazel eyes were bright and his voice was kind. She’d given him a quick nod and gone on her way.

After school, she went straight to the store, gathering ingredients for delicious baked goods and savory recipes she’d been dying to try. Just as she was getting into a good mood, excited to bake for hours on end, she got home, and that mood went straight to hell.

“We’re going to surprise Tomas.”

She had just set her bags down on the kitchen counter when she froze, her father’s words making her smile fade into nothingness. “What?”

“I’ll drive you down, go pack,” he said, waiting for her to be grateful. “Tomas wanted you to go so badly, and I know you want to be there to support him. So, I worked it out, bought tickets, booked a room….Come on, Nesta, take a little roadtrip with your dear old dad to support your boyfriend.” 

Nesta frowned. “I- I can’t. I just bought all of this to make for the guests-.”

“I called your aunt to come stay with your sisters and take care of the guests,” Isaac replied, beaming. “Come on, Nesta. This could be life changing for him, which means it could be life changing for you. You want to be there, don’t you?”

No, she thought, she absolutely did not want to be there.

She was fairly sure, if Tomas lack of communication was any indication, that he didn’t want her there either.

“I can’t, dad,” she said, grasping for any chance to get out of this. “I’ve got a final paper due on Monday and I haven’t even started it.”

“You can work on it in the truck,” he replied, packing a cooler with the essentials - beer, of course - and patting the top of it when he flipped the lid closed. “Now, go pack. If we want to see the numbers ceremony, we have to leave before four.” He hefted the cooler up, and was out the backdoor, going to load it in the back of the truck.

Nesta sighed, knowing that her father was just as hard headed as she was. She wasn’t going to win this battle.

She dialed Tomas number one more time, seeing the other three times she’d tried to call him, unsuccessfully, and listened to it ring. When the voicemail started, she said, “Hey, it’s me. We need to talk about last night and I- I need to talk to you. Can you call me, please? I love you.”

------------------------------

It was a four hour drive to Guthrie, Oklahoma. Four hours to sit on her phone and scroll through her timeline. Four hours for her dad to listen to shitty music and act like this was a fun, little trip they were taking. Four hours to flip through recipe boards and save things she wanted to try next. Four hours to call Tomas with no answer on the other line.

Nesta couldn’t even lie to herself and pretend something had happened, couldn’t even pretend he wasn’t getting her texts or calls. He was still posting on Facebook, still sharing pictures he found funny, still going about like nothing was wrong.

And then, with a little less than an hour left in their silent drive, they blew a tire.

For the first time since they began their journey, Isaac’s smile faltered. They pulled onto the side of the road and Isaac turned off the engine. Nesta still had her bare feet up on the dash, still was scrolling through her phone when Isaac got out of the truck.

He was muttering something under his breath but Nesta didn’t pay him any mind. She was too bitter that she was there to begin with.

Maybe they wouldn’t have a spare and they’d be stuck there for the entirety of the weekend. With any luck, they would have to call Elain to come and get them and take Nesta back home.

That hope faded when Isaac pulled a tire out of the back.

The tire was changed, the flat caused by a deep gash from a nail they hit along the road at some point, and they were back on their way. It cost them nearly two hours, though, and by the time they pulled into the skeezy motel her father had booked a room in, the first night of the rodeo was all but done.

Isaac kept apologizing, saying they’d get to the arena early the next morning, that was she could find Tomas before everything began. Nesta wasn’t stupid though, she knew her dad’s old roping buddies were all here, all with their sons or daughters, if there were here for breakaway or to run barrels. She was sure he was excited to tell them that the up and coming Tomas Mandray was his soon-to-be son-in-law. Or so he thought.

The last thing she heard him say before he fall asleep was, “Man, I can’t wait to see his face.”

Yeah, she thought. Me either.

She didn’t sleep at all that night and when morning came she was completely exhausted. On top of that looming exhaustion, she felt nauseated at the thought of Tomas seeing her. She had called him once more before she’d “gone to sleep” the night before but got his voicemail, once again.

As Nesta hopped into the truck with Isaac, she thought she was going to puke all over the floorboards. Her father was so excited at being back at the rodeo that he didn’t even notice his firstborn's silence or discomfort.

Nesta hated him for that, hated him for not noticing, for not listening.

She hated him for forcing her to be here, for forcing her into this life, just like he had her mother.

Tomas was just like her father.

And her? She was just like her mother.

Two people who were attracted to one another but shouldn’t have a future together, because that future would be shit, no matter how hard they tried.

By the time Isaac parked their truck, Nesta was paralyzed. She couldn’t move, couldn’t think, could hardly breathe.

Perhaps she should be the bigger person. She should go and find him, apologize, and tell him good luck. But even though that’s what she should do, the thought had her hands shaking at her sides.

You can do this, don’t be an idiot, she told herself. She should consider herself lucky. At seventeen, she had found someone who loved her.

At least, he told her he did.

Until he got pissed and stopped answering her calls.

“Coming, Nesta?” Isaac asked, grin wide, tapping on her window. He was ready to go dwell in his safe haven. Nesta had to follow him. She was his excuse to be there, after all.

She nodded, and took a deep breath before opening the passenger side door and hauling herself out.

Nesta and her father gave their tickets to the man at the door and walked in. Isaac stopped and stood there, breathing it all in.

All Nesta could smell was horse shit.

“Isaac Archeron, you son of a bitch, what are you doing here?”

With that one sentence, her father was whisked away, into conversations with his old rodeo friends, seeing people he hadn’t seen since before Nesta was ever even thought of. And she was on her own.

Nesta sat down in the stands. She fiddled with her phone, not wanting to scroll through Instagram for the fiftieth time that day, but having nothing better to do.

Until her phone rang.

His name flashed up on her screen. She’d been trying to get in touch with him for three days, yet now that he was calling her back, she couldn’t make her hands work, couldn’t remember how to swipe her finger across the call to answer the phone.

She answered, but her voice was hesitant as she said, “Hello?”

“Nes? Hey, sorry, my phone hasn’t been working.”

Bullshit bullshit bullshit.

“It’s okay,” she lied. She stood, walking down the bleachers and looked towards the entrance. Her father was still where she’d left him, telling war stories and talking about the good ole days. She could see the stables behind a tarp with the rodeo association's name on it. She asked, “Are you warming Rain up?”

“Nah, he’s good to go. I got a ride in this morning. Just getting him brushed down.”

He hasn’t said a single word about her leaving the other night. Had he not noticed? Was she that insignificant that he hadn't even realized she was gone?

“Well that’s good.” She sighed. “Can we talk for a-?”

He cut her off. “Hey, babe, I gotta get going. Wish me luck?”

“Oh, I- Okay. Good luck,” she said. “I love you.”

“Yeah, you, too,” he said, already pulling the phone from his face. “Bye.”

Nesta stood still as the line went dead. With a deep sigh, she shoved her phone into her pocket. He must be getting ready to make his debut for the day, maybe she would be able to catch him, surprise him, before he went. 

He wanted her to wish him luck.

Maybe she would, if only she could catch him in time.

She wandered around the bleachers, dodging people who looked like they lived and breathed watching underage rodeo championships. 

She had never seen so much hype. The rodeo was somewhere she hoped to dodge as often as possible even though, obviously, she wasn’t always blessed enough to do so. 

Either way, she continued on her journey to finding Tomas, but she came up short.

Looking down at her tennis shoes, which were covered in dust and dirt, she scolded herself for not packing different shoes. Not only were her sneakers filthy but her feet hurt like shit from all the walking. 

Another name was called to get on deck, but she didn’t hear Tomas’, so she went on her way. Maybe he was off somewhere trying to clear his head.

With that thought, she went around to the back of the bleachers, where trucks and trailers were lined up. She passed people laughing and celebrating in deep conversation, but they all ignored her, thankfully.

She turned the corner at the end of the row, though, and froze.

She had found Tomas, but he wasn’t getting ready.

At least, he wasn’t getting ready alone.

His lips were stuck to a girl’s neck, whose head was thrown back, her eyes closed. He was palming her breast beneath her tied up flannel shirt. 

Nesta tried to say something, but she had once again been paralyzed, frozen in place.

“‘Scuse me, ma’am.” An older man leading a horse stepped around her, and the horse whinnied as it passed.

The sound got Tomas’ attention.

His eyes went wide as he saw her standing there, in the doorway to the stables. He blinked a few times, and the girl didn’t realize their fun was over. Her hands roved over his body and she kissed his neck. Nesta began to shake her head and walk away.

“Ne- Nesta, wait!”

She turned and it took everything in her not to break into a run. She wanted to leave. She wanted to vomit. She wanted to scream.

She wanted to cry.

Her entire future, that stupid future she was dreading so much, but the only plan she’d ever had… it was gone.

“Baby!” His voice was much closer than it had been and his hand closed around her wrist. “Baby! Baby, baby, baby. Hey, it’s not what it looks like.”

Her voice was small, but she said, “Get your hands off of me.”

He didn’t. Instead he gripped her shoulders and said, “Whatever you thought you just saw, I promise you’re wrong.”

“It’s a little hard to misinterpret that,” Nesta snapped, snatching her wrist free. “You ignored my calls. Made me feel like shit for the other night. And while I was feeling like shit...you were getting….” Nesta’s words trailed off, and she laughed, loudly, humorlessly. “Fuck off, Tom.” 

“Hey,” he begged, brushing her hair back, the hair that had come undone from her ponytail. “Don’t do this.”

Nesta hated herself for crying in front of him, for shaking her head, for taking a step back. “It’s over. I never want to see you….never want to see you again.”

Her voice broke, and that only made the pitiful scene worse.

Nesta Archeron walked away from Tomas Mandray, and she never wanted to look back.

[sluttyten]

whiplash

summary: you and mark hate each other, but that line between hate and love is really so very thin

words: 4,394

tags: knifeplay, blood play, dry humping, penetration

When SM decides that there should be a female subunit of NCT, you’re one of the members. At first the guys hate the idea of there being female members, but it doesn’t even really matter because your subunit operates almost independently from the rest of NCT. Until one day your manager tells you that NCT U is having a comeback and they want you to be in it.

You’ve met the guys before of course, but you’ve never really practiced with them or even had like a full conversation with any of them. Until now.

The unit is made up of you, Mark, Yuta, Doyoung, Renjun, and Hendery, and one other girl from the female subunit. And instantly, you and Mark don’t get along. Maybe it’s due to a bad first impression or something, but you just grate on each other’s nerves, but it seems that Mark really can’t stand you at all.

Before you met him, before you were in the group, you knew who Mark Lee was. You’d seen videos and stuff of him and he always seemed so nice and sweet and friendly. But now you definitely see that he’s not like that at all. You can’t believe that you were lowkey biasing him before you were actually in the group. Like he’s still very visually attractive but everything else about him…

At some point you’re doing a little bit of overseas promotion for the group, so you’re all staying in a hotel. It’s fun to get to travel overseas with the group and it’s your first time doing so, therefore when you’re talking with the other girl in the group you’re both being loud and laughing, enjoying yourselves on this trip. You’re talking with Hendery and Yuta as well since they’re friendly, but Mark just glared at you, not even a part of this conversation, and he tells you to shut the fuck up. Specifically you. Not your other girl group member, not Yuta, not Hendery. You.

You do shut up, but you sit there internally seething, arms folded as you glare at the back of his head, and just radiate all of your anger, hoping Mark feels it. You can’t stand him, he makes you furious, and it just races through you, violent urges appearing in your mind like pushing Mark up against a wall or maybe having him push you against a wall, hands rough on him or maybe him being rough back with you, and then your imagination shifts and suddenly it’s not just pure anger—the urges in your mind shift the visualization to Mark’s bare shoulders under your hands, his hips against yours.

It’s fucking stupid. Hate and lust are so easily tangled together for you.

Just a few days later, you’re just generally pissed off. You didn’t sleep well the night before because the other girl was talking in her sleep, plus you’re just still mad at Mark for telling you to shut the fuck up, and you just feel angry and frustrated at yourself for your mind creating scenarios that turn sexual every time you want to be mad at Mark.

So, when you’re coming back to the hotel from a performance, neither one of you is actually in a good mood at all. Everyone’s keeping their distance, and as you walk toward the bank of elevators in the hotel lobby, the rest of your group members hurry ahead and the staff members drag behind, but you notice none of this until you’re already in the elevator with the doors closed behind you.

It’s just you and Mark.

“What the fuck.” You groan, turning your back on him.

Mark makes an equally dissatisfied noise as the elevator shudders to life and begins rising. It shudders again and stops. You wait for the doors to open, for some poor hotel guest to step into the hostile air of this elevator, but nothing happens.

The doors stay closed.

And then the lights flicker.

“What did you do?” Mark asks, moving over toward you to move you out of the way so he can look at the panel of buttons you were standing in front of.

You frown at him, wrinkling your nose at his close proximity. “I didn’t do anything. Why would I? You think I want to be stuck in here with you of all people?”

Mark snarks back, and you are just not in the mood at all to deal with him, especially not in light of this new situation.

You shove him.

Mark stumbles backwards until his shoulders hit the opposite wall of the elevator. For just a second his eyes are wide and confused, but then that look disappears and he’s sneering at you, like a challenge.

You close the distance between you, press your hands to his shoulders to keep him pinned like that, but Mark just keeps staring right back at you without any shame or fear or anything more than like this look of satisfaction. As if he’s been waiting for you to snap like this.

And that infuriates you.

“I fucking hate you.” You spit the words, but Mark just smirks.

When you first moved to Seoul, when you left your family behind in pursuit of your career, your father slipped you a gift before you got in the car to leave. “Don’t tell your mother,” he’d whispered. “I just want you to be safe. It’s a big city and there are dangerous people.” He’d pressed the gift into your hands, hugged you tight, and let you climb into the car that would take you away from them.

It was a while later when you finally looked at the gift and found that it was a switchblade he’d slipped you. At first it seemed over dramatic. You would just carry like pepper spray or something. But within your first week in the city, as you walked home alone from the convenience store one night, you wished you had the blade, so you began carrying it.

And even now, a few years later, with bodyguards who protected you, you still carried the switchblade.

You leave one hand on Mark’s shoulder, pinning him to the elevator’s wall, and your other you dip to your waist.

Mark hisses in surprise when you press the cold metal of the blade against his throat. Not hard enough to do any damage, just enough that he feels it’s presence, the sharpness, the threat.

It’s a risky move and you realize it the next second. Mark could freak the fuck out, report you to your managers for threatening him with a weapon. You could be terminated for this.

Luckily, Mark just swears under his breath, and you feel his fingers curl over your hip as he tilts his chin up to expose more of his throat.

Heat unfurls in your belly. The whole atmosphere in the elevator changes. Your pressed against every inch of Mark, your blade grazes his throat when he swallows. When he moans and shifts his hips forward, just enough that you can feel something hard against you, you drop everything, step back.

“Are you turned on, you sick fuck?” You stow the switchblade back in your waistband, noticing the way Mark’s eyes follow it. And though your tone is accusatory, you push away the voice in the back of your mind that reminds you that you’re turned on too. That heat is just pooling inside you; you can still feel the ghostly warmth and weight of Mark’s body against yours, feel the thrill that zipped through you as you held a knife to his throat and he liked it.

The elevator shudders again and moves, smoothly this time until it stops on the floor where your rooms are. You leave the elevator, slipping out before the doors are even all the way open.

You hear Mark leaving behind you, and then you hear the beep of his hotel room unlocking and the soft sound as he falls shut behind him. You shape your head, trying to clear your thoughts that invade, telling you to walk back to his door, to knock and go inside, to just let the list consume you and be fired by that hatred.

Your roommate is sitting on her bed when you come inside your room, and she glances at you sneakily a few times before saying, “What took you so long? We were making bets in our elevator on if you or Mark was going to kill the other first. I don’t see any blood or anything, so I’m only assuming that he’s alive too?”

“Yeah. Our elevator stopped for a couple minutes.” You dig into your suitcase. “I’m going to shower.”

She doesn’t say anything else, just watches you gather your clothes and go. And you’re grateful for the silence because it lets you run things back in your mind, repeating every encounter you’ve had with Mark to date. Is there something you’ve missed? Some detail that showed to you that he would like you holding a knife to his throat like that?

You think about it in the shower until your roommate knocks on the door and says she has to pee. You think about it more as you lay in bed in the dark, your roommate’s sleep-talking making you incapable of falling asleep. Though the thoughts running through your mind could also be to blame for that—how could you sleep when you’re thinking again of Mark’s moan, his hips rolling forward to grind his erection against you.

It’s after one in the morning when you decide you can’t stand it anymore. You pull on a sweatshirt, slip on some shoes, and you tuck your blade into your waistband again.

Mark’s rooming alone. You know that because everyone had made a fuss about it. The other guys hadn’t wanted solo rooms, but Mark won the draw. So you know there’s no one else there to disturb when you walk over to the door. You consider knocking, but it’s late and the noise will echo, it could wake someone else up.

As you stand there contemplating what to do next, your hand raised as if to knock, someone walks up beside you.

“What are you doing?” Your manager asks.

You jump, drop your hand down to your side. “Oh God, you scared me. I’m just—I was coming over to apologize to him. We were arguing in the elevator earlier, and I’ve been thinking about it instead of sleeping, and I just want to apologize. But if I knock it could wake up everyone.”

Your manager, who you know hates that you and Mark don’t get along, smiles. “I think apologizing is a great idea.” He reaches into his pocket, sorts through a few room cards, and then hands one over. “Don’t take too long apologizing, okay? And please don’t make it into a bigger argument. We have a schedule tomorrow that you need to be well rested and on your best mood for, okay?”

You nod, swipe the keycard, and then open the door before handing back the card and watching your manager walk away.

The room is completely dark once the door closes softly. But you stand there for a moment and let your eyes adjust to light offered by the city, shining in through the window since Mark had barely drawn the curtains.

He’s in bed, asleep on his back, so you move carefully as you crawl onto the bed, straddle his waist, and then pull out your switchblade and press the button on the side of it.

Mark’s eyes fly open when he hears the snick of the blade opening. You put the blade to his throat in the same move, quickly quieting him, though he still whispers your name, his voice raspy, surprised and turned on. His hands are on your thighs, his eyes are wide and shimmer in the faint light.

Slowly his lips form into a smile. “Did you come to hurt me?”

You don’t answer him, just carefully draw the tip of the blade over his throat, over the soft skin under his jaw, right to his chin so he angles his face up. You reach with your free hand to touch his hair, brush your fingers through the gentle curls on the top of his head. Your heart pounds in your chest, this close and this intimate with Mark.

“You know, before we were in the same group, I used to really think you were hot. You were my favorite in NCT.” You explain softly. “But then the first time we met, god, it was nothing like I expected. You were totally different than your image, and then the next time was worse. You weren’t nice to me, and I didn’t know what I did wrong. Since then it’s only gotten worse for the two of us, but, shit, you’re still very, very attractive, Mark Lee.”

“Yeah?”

You nod, and say nothing, just slowly roll your hips down over his dick. His fingertips skin up your thigh, dipping under the edge of the shorts you’d worn to sleep in. Your pussy tingles with desire, but you’re in charge here and you want him to feel that.

You sit up, moving your hand with the blade away as you drag Mark upright as well with your hand in his hair. You keep that hand in his hair, but your other goes to his shoulder, and in the moment before you kiss him, you hear Mark’s breath catch and then pick up, and he lurches forward to press your mouths together, a moan slipping from his lips.

You slide the blade over to press against the base of his neck, and Mark groans, his hands on your skin twitch as if to draw your down against him. You sink down against his cock growing hard in his shorts, circle your hips and bite his bottom lip.

“You’re so weird, Mark. Does this turn you on?” You drag the blade down over his collarbones to the neck of his tshirt. “A sharp blade against your throat, a girl who you hate sitting in your lap and wielding it?”

He hums. “Love it. I think I’ve—“ Whatever else he was going to say fades away as you kiss him again.

The tip of the blade snags against the neck of his shirt, and the fire ignited in your belly tells you that maybe it’s time that you just get rid of the shirt all together. You’re pleased at the east slide as your switchblade cuts just right through the fabric. Mark makes a startled sound, but you shush him and kiss him some more until the blade slides sideways and refuses to cut anymore of the shirt.

You sit back on your heels, drop the knife to the side, and grab his shirt instead. Mark watches you with his bottom lip caught beneath his teeth, and you tear his shirt the rest of the way apart. It falls down from his shoulders, leaving Mark’s bare chest in front of you.

When you lips touch his collarbone, Mark makes another quiet contented sound, but the farther down his chest you kiss and lick, the less quiet he gets. When you reach the base of his sternum, he tries to rock his hips up against you, so you press a hand to his shoulder, and push to get him to lay flat again.

You pick up the blade once more, slide it down the center of his chest as you sit up on his hips. Mark watches you closely, try not to breathe too hard when you skim the blade close to his nipples, and when you have it near his abs, he flexes them.

It’s when you start to slide back from his hips, bringing the knife closer to his waistband, that Mark squirms.

“Relax.” You palm his dick. “I’m not going to cut this off or anything.” He pulses in your hand, and you give a gentle squeeze that has Mark closing his eyes and biting back a sound. “Unless you want me to really cut you? The thrill of the knife itself isn’t enough for you, is it, Mark?”

He shakes his head.

You move the knife back up his chest. You hesitate, not wanting to do it in the wrong spot or too deep or anything actually dangerous to him.

“Don’t tell me you’re pussying out now?” Mark asks.

“Of course not.” You touch the tip of the knife to a spot on the right side of his chest. “I’m just building the tension. I know you like it.” You pump your hand over his clothed dick again.

“Then why don’t you just—“

For a moment you think maybe you didn’t actually cut him at all, then a fine line of blood wells up on his chest. Mark hisses, his dick moves in your hand. You drag your thumb through his blood, smearing it over his chest, and you realize your pussy is dripping wet. You didn’t know that you were really and truly into this knifeplay or the blood until right this second.

Mark almost whimpers when you press your thumb against the cut again. “Fuck, fuck. This is hot.” He rocks his hips up into your hand.

It’s a shallow cut, already it’s stopped bleeding.

Mark rolls his hips, trying to get more friction than your hand is offering. When you bring the knife down to his abdomen again, he goes still, but you can almost feel him quivering with the need to move, held back by the thin sliver of the knife’s edge.

Quickly you drop the blade, put both hands to the waistband of his shorts and his underwear and bring them down. His cock springs up, wet and hard, shiny with precum. Mark kicks his shorts off to the foot of the bed, his hand flies to touch himself.

You take up the switchblade again, and gently tap it against the back of his hand, slide it along this forearm and then toward his palm. Mark lets go of his hold on his dick before the blade gets too close to that sensitive part of him.

With nothing touching him, no knife or hands or anything, just you staring down at him, his cock bobs in the cool air, dripping a clear drop of precum to his belly.

You skim the blade through it scooping some up, and you bring it up to Mark’s mouth. His breath clouds the metal, and he looks into your eyes as he holds out his tongue.

You’re very careful as you wipe his wetness off on his tongue. Mark’s cock twitches as he tastes it, the taste of his precum and the cold bite of the metal. You feel powerful like that, fully dressed over his nude body, making him clean his precum off your knife.

And the power feels nice, but as you watch his cock so hard against his abdomen, you’re pretty sure that having him inside you just might feel nicer.

You slip your sweatshirt over your head, and you hear Mark’s gasp as your tight tank top has your tits on full display for him, your nipples stretch against the fabric, and he moans again. You see him lift his hands before he second-guesses himself and drops them to his sides again. You want to feel him touching you, palming your tits while you’re seated on his cock.

You move forward, properly straddling him again, rubbing your still clothed pussy over his bare cock. Mark moans, and you muffle the sounds with your lips on his.

He touches you then, his hands dive into your hair, his hips rock up against you, dry humping you, and making such lovely noises that you swallow down.

You sit up, breaking the kiss, and holding your hands to his shoulders so he can’t follow you (as he tries to do). You glide your hips forward and back, savoring the feel. “Fuck, Mark. Do you want me to fuck you? Do you want to be inside me?”

“Yes, I always have. First time we met,” Mark’s nearly panting as you keep humping him. “That first day, do you remember? You were fresh from practicing your debut? You were wearing a tight top and short shorts, and you looked so fucking pretty, dewy from exertion, and I just looked at you and thought about how good you would look like that but from my cock.”

He’s saying all the right things right now. You’re soaking wet, and you stop to just grind your clit in little circles against the head of his dick.

“I want to make you cum on my cock, so just stop with this fucking teasing.” Mark groans, bucking his hips up.

You rise up on your knees, reach back to pull aside your shorts and panties, and then you sink back down, rubbing your bare wet pussy over his erection. Mark nearly whimpers, but he covers his mouth with his hand, just watching you tease.

When you sink down on him at last, his cockhead dips inside you, and you just keep going, sinking down down down until Mark’s cock is fully inside you. You sit on him for a minute, savoring the feeling of being full. He hits all the right spots just like this, and you wonder how angry it would make him if you just stayed like this, cockwarming him. Would it make him angry enough to take control?

You couldn’t have that. So you move.

You keep it slow at first. Still teasing, loving the way that Mark bites his lip to try to keep quiet, how his eyes flutter shut when you pull up to just the tip and clench around him. You love seeing him like this, totally under your control.

The switchblade lays forgotten in the sheets beside Mark, so you pick it up, close the blade and toss it onto the bedside table. Enough of that, you got what you came here for, though there is one other thing you want to try.

You sink all the way down on his cock, circling your hips, and you moan his name. Mark hums in response, his hands come up to grasp at your hips, helping you in the way you move. You trail a hand up his chest, and when your fingertips touch his throat, Mark opens his eyes to watch you warily.

You press your thumb in, applying light pressure. You just think Mark would look so pretty with your hand on his throat, and if he likes the threat of a knife, maybe he’ll like being choked too.

Mark’s face shutters, closed and cold suddenly.

“No,” he says, batting your hand away. His tone goes so serious that you fully back off, sitting totally upright. At least now you know not to test it again. So instead you reach for his hands, bring them up from your hips to your chest.

His hands are warm and good, massaging your tits, but then also pinching your nipples, rolling them between his fingers. You drop down hard on his cock. Heat blossoms inside you, hungry and seeking all the pleasure you can get.

Mark sits up as if he needs the same thing. He kisses you again, a clash of lips and teeth and tongues. You swear you catch the metallic tang of blood, but then it’s just the taste of Mark’s kiss, a hint of mint and something else, and you fuck yourself down on his cock, harder and faster, no longer trying to tease him because you just want an orgasm, want to feel yourself unraveling with Mark inside you.

He gets there before you. Your fingers move over his chest, one of them dragging over the cut you gave him, and that’s what finally sets him off.

Mark moans out a series of swears, his hands fall to your hip, pulling you down on him as he rocks up into you, and cums. Shooting his load inside your pussy.

You fall complete into him. Chest to chest. You grasp at his back and his shoulder, your nails scrape his skin, and Mark groans, pulsing the last of his cum inside you. You moan his name, whimpering as your orgasm finally hits you, buzzing to life and burning through you. You shake and clench, and you bite down on Mark’s shoulder as his hands press you down on his cock, still grinding you against him.

After the last of your orgasmic bliss fades and the uncomfortable over sensitivity sets in, you put a hand to his arm, and Mark stops moving your hips in those slow circles. You don’t move, not more than detaching your mouth from his shoulder. You just rest your head there instead, breathing slowly and just settled in to this feeling of being wrapped up in Mark.

Everything is quiet. Maybe somewhere outside the room in the city you hear sounds, distant sirens or road noise. But inside it’s nothing more than quiet breathing and heartbeats, the rustling of sheets when you finally move off of him to lie down beside him instead.

In this quiet it seems okay to touch and be touched by each other. Mark’s fingers are light on your skin, tracing your curves, the shapes of shadows, just touching you to touch you.

“How did you get in here anyway?” Mark asks after an eternity, his fingers stop moving over your body and instead curl against your inner thigh.

You take a moment to answer, to finally find your voice again. “I told our manager I was coming in here to apologize to you. He let me in without another question.” You take his hand away from down there.

Mark smiles and twists his hand around so he can play with your fingers. “Apology accepted, I think. And if this is how you always apologize, I don’t see any reason that we should stop doing what we do outside of this room.”

“I still hate you.” You tell him. “You just happen to also really turn me on while annoying the shit out of me.”

“Good,” Mark guides your joined hands to his chest, brings them down to rest over his steadily beating heart. “I still hate you too.”

based off this message: masochist/sadist mark? You're in a co-ed group, you see eachother everyday and for some reason he fucking hates you?? The longest conversation you had was him telling you to shut the hell up because you were laughing (not even that loud)? The nice christian boy is for press? One day you're not in the mood and you snap on him and threaten to come to his room when he's sleeping with a knife(it gets graphic) and he thinks it's hot?So you grab that knife and hold it to his neck and he smiles?

a/n: this was a message that at first I wasn’t too sure about, but god then I started thinking about it and I had to write this