#i have embraced the fact that i am a shitpost account

[frisslimbim]

Neil Josten, Harbinger of Chaos.

[quatregats]

got tagged by @acadiera​, moltíssimes gràcies <3333

1. why did you choose your url?

There’s nobody here and also i like cats <3

2. side blogs?

This is a sideblog, my main is @guillemelgat. I also have 2 other sideblogs but I never use them (they’re technically for Malayalam and a writeblr but there’s basically nothing there so I’m not even gonna bother saying the urls). I don’t think I could honestly handle more than this lol, but if I do get my life together someday I’d love to make an Actual Writeblr (I have been fighting off the temptation though).

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

Since late 2015 (effectively 2016) 👀 I can’t believe I’m actually Old now

4. do you have a queue tag?

lol no I don’t queue I just postdump and let you guys figure it out (I did run a queue for a bit on my main when I was making posts once a week and not being on here for the rest of it and then my tag was, somewhat ironically, “la vida sense queue which is in fact the attitude towards queues that I have since embraced)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

Okay this is going to sound REAL weird but I made myself a private Google site for languages and would like...post blog post things??? about my language study (for a grand audience of zero people), and my friends in high school had Tumblr so I had heard about it from them but also had no concept of what it was for. I decided to check it out at some point and was like oh I could make my language blog be on here because changing platforms is fun and stimulating, and so I did that and told no people and interacted with no one because it was basically just a continuation of the old Google site which was for my brain-dumping mostly, and then a year into having it I somehow let slip to a friend that I looked at Tumblr things sometimes and she was like oh can I follow you and I was like I mean sure but I just post weird language stuff which I don’t think is how people use this site and she was like oh it’s fine I have some friends who do that and I was like :0 and went home and did some digging and realized that there was an actual language community on here lol...Anyways there’s the lore that no one asked for

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

idk, I just like having myself as a pfp because I’m very face-oriented and I feel like it’s important for people to associate my words with my existence as a person??? if that makes any sense. Also I like the trans flag in the background but I might change up the picture soon because I don’t like it being a generic picrew :/

7. why did you choose your header?

I just really really really like the woods in New England and idk I think I was feeling sentimental or something. I literally changed it less than a month ago and I already forget why lol

8. whats your post with most notes?

I think on this account it’s the post about John T Kenney’s painting of Duck 😖 I just wanted to scream about things into the void but the weird TTTE fans found it and I Regret My Choices now. I like making popular posts though, I do literally everything within my power to keep them within a limited circle because idk how to handle interacting with strangers

9. how many mutuals do you have?

somewhere around 30 but a lot of them aren’t active anymore :(

10. how many followers do you have?

212 on here

11. how many people do you follow?

189....wow I really cut that number down by a lot (I’m trying to keep it under control so I spend less time on here)

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

uhhh actually idk what counts as one but yeah I’m pretty sure I have, I make a lot of dumb posts on this webbed site

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

I plead the fifth

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

ooof idk, I try to avoid conflicts like my life depends on it because I’m a very conciliatory person in general. I’ve had discussions, I think, and weird comments on my posts, and there’s been drama on here that I’ve tried to stay out of in general. I think I’ve managed to avoid getting in fights afaik

15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

I get very freaked out about reblogging like 90% of posts even without the guilt tripping, I am always overthinking things, so no, I Detest them with all my soul

16. do you like tag games?

prev tags, I really just come on here to say lots of words so the more the better

17. do you like ask games?

yep yep! see above :)

18. which of your tumblr mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

I have absolutely zero grasp on what tumblr famous is because I’m in the middle of a very specific cell of tumblr so y’all seem famous to me, but honestly I have no idea. It seems like you guys do have way more followers and get way more notes than me though, so good for you <333 (not like a jealous thing, I don’t want notes or followers outside my mutual circle at this point, but I’m happy for you guys)

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

I refuse to answer any questions about crushes on anybody, blanket house policy for all people asking. I am way too repressed for that

I’m going to tag @ahabixa, @chatwiththeclouds, @portugue, @anthropologicle, @alvallah, @arabskaya-devushka, and anyone else who wants to <333

[solaeter]

hello op! this is my first time requesting something. I hope I don't fuck it up.

I'm Miley, and my favorite emoji is ✨ (so I can be sarcastic on text lol) I also like going 🖐️😔 at almost everything

I hope I'm doing this right

I think I'm straight, but you could say bicurious. I'm brown, like Asian brown, i wear glasses :) I'm 5'6 in height, people tell me I have nice fingers idk why lol

I have a lil acne :( but I don't care much about it lol it izz what it izz

My love language is physical touch hehe followed by words of affirmation :) *touch starved since 2020 *

I am an ESTP, an April Aries 🌝 I think I'm an ambivert. I like people and talking to ones I share interests with. I can be shy sometimes... I have been told I am very loud and "savage" lol

Umm about sexual preferences I can say I took the test 🌝 and turns out I'm 100% switch followed by degradee and experimentalist. I think that says everything lol

I hate liars, slow walkers, mangoes, whiners, scary movies (yes.), Karens and sappy couples. I love memes, cake, anime, manga, twitter and painting. I love alternative rock and indie pop music.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE AND IT SCARES ME lol I study science and chemistry goes over my head T_T

I want someone to be honest with me? Keep it real? and not bore me out. Unpredictable? Idk myself. I don't believe in soulmate au, I think both sides must put on effort to make a relationship work.

I think wearing eyeliner gives me confidence, it makes me feel good about myself. I like it when I'm able talk to people and hear their thoughts.

As you can tell I use *lol and memes as a coping mechanism.

I am really hoping this is ok. It's 2 am and I cannot think straight but it was nice writing this out lol

Hope you have a good day ahead! Drink water and be safe byeee love you

Jujutsu Kaisen Matchup Event | CLOSED

Thank you so much for participating!!! Oh my goodness this took me soo long cause of endless distractions and irl things 😫. Pls forgive me and thanks again!! 💕💕

Out of everyone in Jujutsu Kaisen, I pair you with..

First off, congratulations on getting the legend himself to settle down! Secondly, mere height difference will have Gojo either teasing you or using you as a personal armrest. Plus he finds it insanely adorable cause you're just so fuckin cute and he just cannot 🥺. This bastard will steal your glasses and look into them before giving them back. Or he'll trade you his just so you can see the pitch black view he can only see out of. If you question him about it, he'll make some type of witty remark just to boost his own ego. Gojo will shower you with compliments, ranging from sweet to down right lewd. It just depends on his mood at that moment. Plus he cannot go without commenting about your gorgeous, beautiful and perfect figure. He’s also the one to compliment your makeup, especially how it makes your eyes pop. Honey, you have him wrapped around your finger. 

From the moment you two started dating, Satoru was all over you. He thrives off affection and touch just as much as you, if not more. He will always have a hand on you, whether it be locked with yours or resting on the small of your back. He just has to have his hands on you, but if you need space or something, he will pout but listen. Maybe not for long of course 🙄. Satoru is good with words, easily swaying anyone [except other women, pls honey he’s lucky to have you] so he'll have you covered anytime you need some type of affirmation. Just be sure to do the same for him, even though he's almighty and "the strongest" as he would say, sometimes he needs an extra push to keep his head in the right place.

Satoru really enjoys how you can be shy one moment then delivering a savage burn that has him mentally thanking the heavens it wasn't pointed at him. Though let's be honest, he'd be the main target of your sassy remarks. The dude has them coming but he just loves it so much that sometimes he pokes at you just to see what you'll do. Now on the days your social battery runs out and you're more to yourself, Satoru will take the reigns and do your talking, cause let's be honest again, the dude doesn't know how to stfu when he gets going 🙄.

Satoru likes to keep things fresh. He’s a try anything once type of man, so he’ll willingly embrace the fact you’re a switch. The view he has when you’re on top of him, chefs kiss. Plus he’ll degrade you as if it were second nature. I won’t say anymore to keep this sfw lol, but Satoru can’t get enough of you. 

Did someone say cake? Satoru’s sweet tooth is almost unparalleled and whenever you have a craving for something, he’s quick to offer suggestions. He appreciates your interests and may or may not exploit some of your dislikes just to rile you up. Like putting on a scary movie one night just to have you closer even if it means possibly getting into trouble 😌. He’ll also walk slowly in front of you just to hear you complain, it humors him. Satoru is a bastard and he knows it, especially when you probably smack him on the back and stalk ahead. Good lord it gets him rolling. Satoru is also the one to follow all the recent trends and memes, probably even somehow has a pretty popular twitter account full of shitposting and dumb selfies. So he’ll be right there beside you cackling at memes or mocking ‘Karens’ in his typical dramatic fashion 🙄.

Dreams for the future are nice and all, but Satoru doesn’t mind if you’re unsure. Life is about living and not being shackled by shit. He’d say to live day by day and if someone can’t accept that, well kindly fuck them 🥱. Don’t ask him for help with anything science related, the man will just 😶.

Satoru is a very honest individual, so he’ll always be up front with you. Even if it might be offensive, he'll try to soften the blow with a cheesy smile and some type of apology. There’s never a dull moment with the strongest sorcerer. He will keep you on your toes for sure, he’s like a man child until he has to be serious. I believe Satoru doesn’t believe in soul mates either, he wasn’t one for love until you came around anyways. Falling for you was a slap to the face, but a good one. 

[deafchild2000]

I Never Really Liked Rikki

Alright before y'all go on and say I'm "shitposting" or degrading your favorite mermaid, just let me let it out!

Rikki Chadwick is one of the 5 mermaids (yes, counting Bella and Charlotte) on H2O: Just Add Water. When she she became a mermaid, she got heating powers, essentially leading to actual fire and lightning powers in Season 2.

On the Wikia, she's described as: Rikki is quite rebellious, independent, sarcastic and carefree, making the two argue often.Rikki frequently speaks her mind without euphemism or without care that her opinions might hurt other people's feelings. She has a hard time sympathizing with people who are in pain, as seen in "Dangerous Waters." She can be very stubborn and has a short temper. Rikki has a strong adventurous streak and is the first to fully embrace the possibilities of the girls' new powers. Despite their arguments, Rikki and Emma do get along a lot of the times, and Rikki genuinely cares for her friends. This is demonstrated when she takes Emma and Cleo out on a shopping spree with her new money in "Dangerous Waters." To make up for her previous blunder in the same episode, she also does her best to buy Cleo the perfect new fish (as thanks, Cleo dubs the fish "Hot Stuff," in honor of Rikki). Rikki also shows her care for Emma when Rikki prods Byron to apologize to her friend in "Sink or Swim," revealing that Emma is not as tough and thick-skinned as she lets on.

Not only does Rikki shows her rebellious nature freely, but she encourage it in her friends as well. In "Pressure Cooker", Rikki encouraged Cleo and Emma to rebel against Charlotte Watsford and her mother, Annette Watsford who were invited by Don Sertori to stay over for dinner. Thinking that Don is getting remarried and that Charlotte will become Cleo's step sister, Rikki encouraged the others to use their powers to ruin the food, not knowing that Annette was only invited as a business partner. Despite her carefree nature, Rikki is capable of displaying a sense of responsibility especially when it comes to money. In the episode "Hook, Line and Sinker", Rikki attempted to look for some financial security for her family by attending Harrison Bennett's seminar, only to find it to be a scam. In "In Over Our Heads", Rikki attempted to help her father by trying to find a lost treasure for the reward money because her family was struggling with the bills. During her stay as café manager in season three, she was able to show her ability in running a business successful. When Rikki left after breaking up with Zane, the café started to struggle despite Sophie replacing her as manager, showing her organizational and monetary abilities.

But the things is, I never connected to her. Actually, I could never relate to any of the trio, but Rikki at most (ironically it's Charlotte and Bella that has my favor.).

See, by technically, I should like her because I'm sarcastic, independent, rebellious, stubborn, easily vengeful, unapologetically blunt at times and savvy business-wise (side hustle - jobs- for money). Plus I've been borderline homeless and raised by a single parent.

But for myself and others, I had needed to be more than that. Where I'm sarcastic, I am concerned and loyal when it needs to be regardless of circumstances. Where I'm independent, even I have to admit defeat and ask for help because I accept I don't know everything. When I'm stubborn, while admitting for fighting in what I believe in, I do my best to set it aside when need be or else Karma would be on my ass. For my rebelliousness, I have to know when I draw the line and go too far. Same goes for being vengeful, but I at least have someone (mom and uncle) on my corner to steer me away and even get a good laugh out of it while I can still reverse it. I'm legit working on being blunt since past experiences taught me sugarcoating isny always the best option, but I do have basic understanding why people do it. Sometimes the bandaid does need gently peeling to get the job done - especially if it's for the sake of a child.

So in comparison, between me and Rikki, felt that aside from a few glimpses of her realizing her mistakes and vulnerability, in those 3 years of being a mermaid, she never really took on the lessons she learned and developed Empathy. Empathy is all about understanding someone and their feelings, especially if their in a place you've been before. And considering that Rikki had a bunch of friends to pull her from the dark side of her personality, no one really bothered to do that when her personality took a turn for the worse in Season 2. Season 3 was when she nearly reached the point of No Return if Will hadn't intervene to stop her from borderline killing Ryan in the moon pool.

Then, I've talked to friends about this and perhaps it originally stemmed from the mermaid aspect of her life. Yes, H2O is just a tv show, and it aired years before I entered my own teenhood, but people are drawn to it because they can relate to the girls in the show. So, when it came to being a mermaid, I believed that it was because all teenagers struggled with being different and that what usually (or generally) sets them apart from their peers.

Now, I live in the US, and I'm an African-American female who's smart (book and street-wise) and has an internal, physical disability: I'm deaf in my right ear. Add in a potential fact that I might have Aspergers (a form of Autism), I never really stood a chance growing up. I knew how to be apart of a group (most of the time), but I was essentially a wall flower in it. There was/are time when I had to dive into things trending for pre/teens just so I had to understand what the big fuss was about. (Plus watching people deal with unnecessary teen drama has always been a turnoff for me.)

Thus leading me to believe Rikki never really had to fight for anything. Yeah, she was pure but not poor enough to live in a single house of multiple strangers (which was my life in 5th grade). She didn't have to struggle to fit in, whether or not that was the case, since she basically had her own little niche of mermaid sisters and (a) boyfriend. In my case, that's more than anyone could ever get in high school- minus the mermaid aspect. But if you add that in, Rikki literally had a whole separate life all to herself where she could get away and in my case, I never had that. Reading and writing was the only escape I had from reality and there were times even that wasn't enough.

So, during that time, if I was one, being a mermaid, like Rikki, would be embeaced but with the rightful amount of shock of the situation would also be there as well.

And maybe I would be prone to abuse my powers, who wouldn't? Having a supernatural ability, using it as I see fit to work for me or against others? I actually thing having something no one else has tend to make anyone else selfish, whether they are all alone or in a small group of those like them. It's Human Nature to be like that. Besides, look when the trio had done so on multiple occasions, yet were hypocrites in regard to Charlotte when she did so to Nate. (Which I will happily point out all the times Rikki did just that, like when she found out she was a part of a fish scheme and all the other times she blantatly almost killed someone with her powers.)

However, I also knew that "With Great Power, Comes Great Repsonibility" is true, regardless of fictional or realistic obligations. If I did want to just pranks someone, I would do it so obviously- with potentially witnesses- and then make it a recurring gag.

(To be honest, if I did and did it so often to a sibling like Kim Sertori, well, let's just say I'd accept responsibility If I got found out because I had it coming for doing said pranks in the first place.)

If I had wanted to use my powers like a weapon to harm someone, I knew I better have a damn good reason to do so, especially if said powers were as dangerous as Rikki's. And then question if that said person was a threat or just someone I really didn't like. And add in the fact if it was on purpose or a genuine accident (like, for example, how I'd like to believe Emma was traumatized after realizing ahe had frozen Miriam alive. Sure the girls saved her in time, but still, that should have been a hint to the girls to not only expand the knowledge of their powers, but become increasingly aware of how dangerous they are. So if they hadn't saved Miriam or Rikki ended up killing her....)

Basically summarizing above, Rikki was shown on more than one regard just how careless and irresponsible she is with her powers and then had the nerve to be self-righteous and hypocritical when someone else does it, and it's someone she doesn't like.

However, while I admit to giving her cudos on some of her ocean adventure - definitely as she's a career diver as an adult- I don't think she really took into account just how much of an advantage she had as a mermaid. While she wasn't a full-on superhero, she probably spent more time in the ocean more than anyone else since getting her tail. Meaning you'd finished being more awareness to the issues on the ocean such as trash and oil spills, taking in for granted having a rich boyfriend could technically help achieve resources to do so. Yeah, they shouldn't be drawing attention to themselves, like at all, but if the ocean is your second home, you can't tell me you'd wouldn't try to help keep that home alive and healthy.

So maybe the producers didn't show it or it just never occurred to them (or in Rikki's case, until her job profession), but if I had mermaid powers and a tail, Lord knows I would have been kept busy for all my teen years cleaning the beaches and pulling up trash after trash to at least somebody caught onto it and started taking action themselves. Not starting a trend, but a chain reaction. And it wouldn't be a seasonal thing either. Basically, if you had the ability to be a live like a fish, you use your human life to bring awareness to sustain that life. We caught maybe a few glimpses btwn H2O and Mako Mermaids, but that would have been a great way for Rikki to express just how much she clearly cared about being a mermaid. But thus she didn't, so I have no reason to believe she did or had a basic understanding of what oppertunities she had offered to her as a mermaid.

I would see it before anyone told me.

And sensing that I'm going off topic, I'll just steer myself back to the point: All other reasons aside, here are my main reasons I never liked her:

Rikki never really grew to have Empathy, or understand when someone is in a place where she once was. She stayed mentally the same as she grew up and it wasn't until she was an adult and found herself back where she started, that she finally developed it.

She actually had more than any other teenage girl can want and more. A roof over her head to call her own, friends and a chance for a significant other? Plus an amazing double life you had to see to believe? For someone like me, who has to fight through obstacles everyday between my race and disability, everything about that spells something worth taking for granted.

She never really took responsibility for her powers or learned from the trouble she caused. Maybe at the time, things seemed necessary, but overall, she was extremely careless and selfish in regards for it. And then some, in regards for using her powers in public and nearly exposed herself, especially when nearly seriously hurting someone, but then had the nerve to berate someone who did just that when she'd done the exact same or worse (adding in potentially murdering someone in the midst of her anger). Season 2 was the so best example of how bad that got and frankly, turned me against her completely to be honest. And Season 3 was basically like Season 1, only Cleo was in Emma's place plus a crazed obsession with protection the moon pool. (Which proven right considered how many damn people found it in the show's history, but still!)

While debatable, she never shown and consideration to the environment ( the Ocean) until it fit her needs. I can name a hundred of ways she could have shown concern and and helped environmental impacts and sea animals affected by it, and do it anonymously, especially considering her future job as a diver.

Like all stories, the 2000s H2O trio is supposed to be 3-dimensial characters who change throughout the story - or in this case, a show - where Emma was a responsible girl who learned to enjoy life, Cleo was a kind girl who learned to grow a backbone and Rikki was a loner who got friends.

As a child, it's easy to see it that way. And considering how Rikki is viewed as someone you'd want to grow up into -Strong, opinionated, stand firm in what's right - who wouldn't idolize that. Anyone, even young girls, should be like that because, in the real world, values like that are rarer than your led to believe.

But when you take into to account of whether or not Rikki is the type of role model you should look up to, then that's why I labeled and the things she's done under:

Static Character.

Rikki started and ended H2O as a mermaid with a rebellious streak. But though she's made mistakes and apologized, she never changed who she was and truly learned from her mistakes, leading me to believe she just kept getting things without any real consequences, thus no character developement.

As I'm ending this, I will acknowledge that I know this sounds like a rant degrading Rikki - and someone will chew me out defending her for it- but after watching all the seasons and how taken Rikki into consideration I came to see if she was real, we'd never get along. So while I'm not going "I hate her so much!" or "She's so ugly!", I'm simply stating why that I don't believe Rikki deserves all the fanfare she's got over the years.

[nakiriialice]

i dont think this site is ever going to die, and i do stand by what i said earlier, that i dont intend to delete/leave this blog anytime soon, but tbh this whole ordeal made me realize that it might be for my own good if i started investing my time into something else.

like, dont get me wrong. tungle is still fun in its own way. i joined originally because i wanted to explore & share fanwork made by fans for other fans, i wanted to cultivate my interests into a single place, and that is still what drives me to this very day. followers never really were the thing that motivated me. fandoms were busy, thriving, blooming, and it was super exciting to pick out the stuff i wanted to collect & showcase it on my blog.

i was part of the tokyo ghoul and the the osomatsu-san fandom for a really long time, and i enjoyed it immensely. we shared theories, made gifsets, bombarded each other with shitposts. it was truly a creative hobby at first! in fact, making graphics was what inspired me to become a graphic designer.

i learned a lot about life in general on this site when i first joined, i became aware of my own sexuality, i realized how hurtful internalized misogyny & racism are, the more stories i saw from ppl across the world, the more i learnt to appreciate and accept those around me, i embraced my own femininity once again, and i thrived to become a kinder person overall.

im glad that i grew out of my edgy phase and realized that im an empathic person and that it isnt a weakness at all.

but obviously there are always two sides of the same coin, and i do think my slowly worsening mental health & crippling depression really were induced and fueled by this site after all. seeing posts about how everything always sucks just poisoned my brain and i couldnt escape the loop for a very long time. tungle was a terrible coping mechanism.

but, all in all, i had to survive all of that. i had to get up and say it to myself “hey were going to get better”. and it was really hard at first. because even though i clearly understood that i became a much better person, i still missed the me that i was before depression. i missed my humor, i missed how i was always in the center of attention, how i always laughed everything off. it all felt like... someone else from the past. and i missed her.

so i kept going, and i eventually found her again. and i didnt even realize it first, it all felt so natural. so obvious. that this is me. i am now happy to be myself.

this site has taught me a lot, but its also becoming more terrible day by day. this CANT be your life. this SHOULDNT be your life. this is just a site. a site we made an account for to have fun. blogs i used to follow & admire left like more than a year ago, and tungle has been sparce ever since. theres nothing here anymore. im just here out of habit at this point. and... sometimes its still fun, yeah. bless the content creators who still have the motivation to do anything here.

lately ive just been scrolling past my dashboard. with a hollow expression. on one hand im going to miss the graphics and the art, the people i met here (even though we never really talked, they were still part of my life), being consantly connected to my fandoms (even though they might be small now), and of course the memes. but maybe it would be best to hang around... somewhere else. theres noone to talk to here anymore, noone to shout into the void for, and it IS bad for my mental health overall.

i think ill be here, though. im not gonna just leave or anything like that. maybe ill just be lurking more than usual. maybe i should be just... emotionally over with this site, and find something more... fun.

[spicydemonfox]

i am fully embracing the fact that this is now the place where i vent all me shit since twitter has been infiltrated by people that need to think im normal what a sad time 

to fully contextualize this outburst i have not only shaved my head in the past year, but i also moved to Manchester and started a PhD in American literature

that means that even though i have a twitter account dedicated solely to my academic endeavors, there are some colleagues who still have the audacity to follow me on my personal account as well and I have found that I do filter my shitposting for their sakes 

this is now over since i have deleted all traces of my tumblr from there and now it’s time for foxy and spicy demon to fully take over here buckle up 

i’m also currently going through an identity crisis and a mental breakdown regarding only everything in my life but is fine cause i just had a new bullet journal delivered so i will focus on that and bury all my issues deep inside so they can kindly resurface when i need it the least again 

[existentialpotatoandthebear-blog]

“Come Hell or High Water”

Beard here,

So I was thinking, why does “hell” come first in the phrase “come hell or high water"? I mean, the phrase is supposed to indicate that, no matter how difficult any obstacles may be in the way of pursuing a goal, one will still achieve that goal. But you would expect there to be some escalation from the first obstacle to the next; however, this is not what we find. In fact, “high water,” as many victims of floods would tell you, can be devastating-- but next to “hell,” it's just kind of piddling and pathetic. I mean, that's like your buddy, Jim Who-writes-on-weekends, following up Shakespeare.

Sure, “high water” kills people, destroys homes, and marrs your life forever-- but hell is where your nipples get chewed off by demons as you watch your loved ones burned alive for eternity. “High water”: you get wet until you die; “hell”: your entire existence is pain and misery until never, because it's never ending. Now, it would make sense if it were “come high water or hell.” It would give a clear indication of how dire circumstances could be and the task would still be done. But by starting with “hell,” the mention of “high water” becomes entirely irrelevant. I mean, no one is going to say, “You know, I'd go through hell to get this done, but I am not up for this 'high water’ bullshit, so count me out.” No one does that.

Except you, Chad, but that's because you're a pseudo-intellectual shitposter with nothing better to do than indulge in delusions of grandeur and defy perfectly reasonable expectations.

Now, I hear what you're saying, all you non-Chads: “But Beard, ‘high water or hell’ is not as rhythmically and aesthetically pleasing as ‘hell or high water.’ When composing any piece of writing, from the very short to the very long, one must take into account all elements of literary form, not the least of which being rhythm and meter.” To that I say, very astute observation, everyone but Chad. And I agree. That is why I propose, not swapping the words, but doing away with the entire phrase itself. “Why?” you ask. Well, my dear reader, because we already have a perfectly good phrase to replace it: “by hook or by crook.”

Perhaps the meaning is not entirely the same, but the spirit of the phrase is maintained rather well: no matter what happens or how we proceed, we shall prevail. It satisfies virtually any requirement one could imagine: it rhymes; it flows; it communicates the same message of certainty and assurance; and it has a similar visceral intensity. But there is one flaw I won't ignore. While “come hell or high water” implies resilience and resoluteness in the face of adversity, “by hook or by crook" suggests a savagery and ruthlessness to one's upcoming solution to a problem. I cannot ignore, deny, or find any workaround whatsoever to this. I won't even argue that it doesn't matter, because word choice always matters. But I will say that the trade-off is worth it, at least from my perspective.

Our decisions have consequences. If we choose to whole- and single-heartedly embrace “by hook or by crook,” we will lose the David-versus-Goliath-esque sense of perseverance against trials when fighting for a greater good, which would drastically change the course of literary history until the advent of a new phrase which summarises the feeling just as well. But we cannot pretend that continuing to use “come hell or high water" is not a decision as well, to ignore meaningful style in favor of poetic style.

My proposal is to stop using “come hell or high water” until we can find a better phrase with just as much rhythmic merit but more in the way of meaning and, briefly, use “by hook or by crook” in the meantime. I am not suggesting censorship or such atrocities as striking the use of “come hell or high water” from texts and history books. Rather, I would have us remember it fondly as a charming memento of a bygone era, where the pleasant of sound ruled the day, and where holistic elemental structure was an afterthought.

Anyway, I don't really care all that much, to be honest, but I just, kind of, you know…

Anyway, Beard here,

Signing off.