#i hope tsa explodes

[dreamofbecoming]

saw a tumblr post like a month ago about someone buying different flavors of creamed honey from an indigenous shop that was only on my dash bc it got derailed into something else my mutual thought was funny, but i went and found the shop anyway and now i’m sitting in bed eating blueberry honey straight out of the jar bc i can’t sleep and my head hurts so. happy destiel eve or whatever

[jotarothekidsmissyou]

⁸/⁰³/²² ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ᴛʜɪꜱ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ᴡᴀꜱ ʜᴇᴀᴠɪʟʏ ɪɴꜱᴘɪʀᴇᴅ ꜰʀᴏᴍ “ɪɴꜰʀᴜɴᴀᴍɪ” ʙʏ ꜱᴛᴇᴠᴇ ʟᴀᴄʏ. ɪ ᴅᴏ ᴀᴅᴠɪꜱᴇ ʟɪꜱᴛᴇɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ɪᴛ, ᴀꜱ ɪᴛ ᴡɪʟʟ ꜱᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ ᴛᴏɴᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜɪꜱ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ. ʜᴇʟʟᴀ ꜱᴇʟꜰ ɪɴᴅᴜʟɢᴇ ꜱɪɴᴄᴇ ɪᴛ’ꜱ ᴏɴᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴍʏ ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴏɴɢꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴄᴇɴᴀʀɪᴏꜱ ɪ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴍʏ ʜᴇᴀᴅ. ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜɪꜱ ꜱʜᴏʀᴛ ꜰɪᴄ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴊᴏᴛᴀʀᴏ’ꜱ ᴘᴇʀꜱᴘᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ, ᴀꜱ ʜᴇ ᴛʀɪᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴀʏ ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ ʙᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʙᴏᴀʀᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʟᴀɴᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ᴀꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛᴡᴏ..ᴡʜᴏ ᴋɴᴏᴡꜱ..

For 50 days she accompanied me, fighting along by my side. For my mother she risked her life, a total stranger turned into a partner. Whom I care deeply for. In the midst of fighting DIO she was badly injured, barely even standing. And yet, she showed so much determination.

Due to the seriousness of the “trip” there weren’t many moments in which we could spend time together nor could expound on what we were. But in times we did, she stayed quiet, enjoying the company we unconsciously provided for one another. She kept a small smile and stared out, savoring the views around the world. Another moment we shared was during the fireworks on New Years. Once the clock strike midnight, unleashed, colorful sparklers that lit up the night sky. Seemly, I was supposed to be watching the display but I couldn’t help to look at her instead. How her face showed so much happiness my eyes couldn’t divert elsewhere. For a split second I wondered if she would ever look at me like that..

I never thought what would happen after we defeated DIO. My attention was fixated on the present that it never occurred to me that our time together will end. The rest of the group already went back to their homes, so why is it difficult when she has to leave? Saying goodbye at the airport would be our last encounter with each other; so what should I do then? Act like everything is normal and let her slip away from me? I want to be able to see her frequently, maybe even get to know her rather than a surface level friendship. But something keeps holding me back. My throat clogs up at the mere thought of being transparent and emotionally vulnerable with her. 

How do I covey these feelings?

As we drove to the airport mentally I was hoping something would happen. An interruption that will make her stay for at least one more day. But my hopes instantly vanished once she approached bag checking. My continuation with her will be no more.

One at a time, both my mother and grandfather said their goodbyes and somewhat threatening for her to come visit again. I knew my turn will be approaching since they hinted at the fact I’ll surely miss her too.

“Oh so no goodbye JoJo?” She teased leaning her body forward. Her body was so close to mine I couldn’t even utter back a response. Instead with my nerves getting the best of me I pulled my cap in front of my face. If I were to make any eye contact with her I felt as though my heart would explode.

“Oh so no goodbye JoJo?” She teased leaning her body forward. Her small frame was so close to mine I couldn’t even utter back a response. Instead with my nerves getting the best of me I pulled my cap in front of my face. If I were to make any eye contact, I felt as though my chest would explode. 

“Here,” I mumbled, still concealing my rosy cheeks. Out of my pocket I handed her a letter, a letter which contained my feelings for her. Things I wish I had the courage to say. When I felt the letter no longer in my grasp, I suddenly felt a tug at the chain attached to my jacket. She brought me close to her smug face, there our noses touched, and our lips were a couple inches away. My breathing hitched, what was she about to do next?

“I’ll miss you too,” She whispered, placing a kiss on my cheek. Strolling her luggage behind her, she waved one last goodbye and entered TSA.

“HA! I knew it!” My mom, Holly exclaimed, seeming as though she won a bet.

“Damn I was hoping for a love confession!”

[chlodines]

dude who stole my airpods pro while tsa was making sure i didn’t tape pipe bombs to the undersides of my A size tits i hope you got the middle seat on a 19hr flight, i hope u die. also i hope ur plane explodes. i only had one airpod in there bitch i hope u make zero dollars from that. you also stole my bucees chapstick so i hope you get every disease known to man from it even tho i don’t have them i just hope u die from death xd die die die die die die die die die die d

[gaitwae]

It’s Fate •||• Loki x Reader

WORD COUNT: 3025

Loki stepped into the shadows of the forest, holding his breath and melting into his armor. He wasn’t sure if it was even worth it to go into the Forest of Ydraggsil. But the cosmos were born there, in the “branches” he had been taught about. Loki knew that the answer to his very soul was written in the songs the ruffling leaves sang. His heart hammered in his rib cage as he let out a shaky breath.

He scratched his palms with worry, closing his eyes in thought. He could prove that he was his brother’s equal . . . worthy of being more than just a Jotun. No matter what Odin had said, no matter what Frigga said, he was just not what either of them said. He couldn't be what Frigga had thought he was. He wasn’t even close enough to be as good as she thought. He was much more than Odin had said. Loki could prove that. He just needed to know...

Would it be worth it if he couldn’t?

Child, a beautiful voice of the Norns whispered. That startled him. The Norns were silent, spoke in riddles and curses. But he could just. . . . Tell. He hadn’t expected to hear that. She continued, What brings you to where souls are born and fate is scripted?

Loki swallowed, stepping in to the wood. “Uncertainty,” he says meekly, eyes welling with tears. “And losing the will . . . the will to live.” He sank to his knees. “I beg of you, help me find my place in the world.”

He knew that it was selfish to ask the Norns to give him things, things that not even they could change. He would be cursed for such confident brattiness. He held his head high in the sky, watching the cosmos conflict, purple and blue and green explode and tear at each other. Green smoke curled around his body. Loki had to refrain from panicking, trying his hardest not to scream in fear, not to sob from the pain of his broken soul.

The leaves rustled. He breathed deeply, his heart rate painfully fast. His neck hurt from the rush of blood. His heart kept crying out in the lonely longing for companionship.

Just a place in the world? Nothing else? She sounded. . . . Expectant. Like men who had braved the branches before had always asked for proud things. Wisdom; strength; a lady’s hand. Loki just wanted not to be alone.

A tear slips from his eye. “Give me my glory back. . . . Give me someone who will love me. . . .”

Loki Laufeyson, the Norns whispered with a reassuring tone, you’ll find someone who loves you. It’s fate.

Loki swallowed, gasping some. That was a lie; wasn’t it? It had to be. He wiped his eyes. He sat there, staring at the ground. One day, he would. One day. He tried to swallow his fears. But it didn’t work.

The cosmos rippled again, a woman’s laugh ringing through his ears. Not the Norn who had spoke, it wasn’t Hers. This laugh. . . . It stung. Loki covered his ears. No one he cared for loved him back. He started to hyperventilate. The laughing got louder and louder.

No. No. “Please. . . . Make it stop,” he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut. The smoke curled around his body. His skin turned blue.

“You’re a dirty, evil Jotun,” Thor’s voice taunted somewhere. Loki stood, looking around for his brother. “Did you really believe that the Norns would help you?”

“Stop this illusion!” he pleaded. Loki spun around, hoping to find something. This had to be a lie. “Stop!”

“What illusion, my son? You’re seeing the truth,” Odin called, coming from a different direction. He turned toward the sound, hoping that his father wouldn’t scoff at him, punish him. Tears fell faster. Streamed. His father’s cold voice.

“Father—,” Loki tried, caving in and panicking.

“I’m not your father!” Loki flinched, raising his arms in protection as he stumbled back from the invisible people pushing him.

“No!” Loki cried. “NO!”

---------- -*- ----------

I sat bolt right up in my bed, chest heaving and sweat drenching my body. I looked over to my side. A beautiful woman. My panic melted quickly, but my fears didn’t. I was next to my fiancée. She gently pushed me back down.

“Loki, shhh,” she soothed. “It was all a dream. You’re safe.” I rested my head on her shoulder. She ran her hands through my hair affectionately.

“Oh, Bryleigh,” (Bry-lee) I sigh, hugging her gently. “It was the same dream as last time. . . . With th-the forest . . . you have no idea—”

Her hazel eyes and blonde hair were strangely lit from the moonlight in the window. I had never been more grateful for her. I sigh again, kissing her once, twice, three times. Bryleigh pulled away, resting her forehead against mine.

“It’s okay. Go back to sleep. I love you,” she said, rubbing my back. “We have to both work tomorrow, so we should go back to sleep.” I nodded in agreement. I would have to explain to my secretary, (Y/N) why I was late.

Oh, no. I sat up. I practically scrambled to get dressed. “Honey, what are you doing?” Bryleigh asked. I checked my cellphone. Truly a magical mortal instrument, the cellular telephone. 2:35. I still had thirty minutes.

“Picking (Y/N) up at the airport,” I said, my tongue between my teeth as pull on a shirt. “I lost a bet, so I had to chauffeur her to and from her flight.” I laughed, face hot from remembering her smile. Oh, (Y/N) was adorable. Like my little sister. And I didn’t have to actually chauffeur her; I just wanted to. But Bryleigh wouldn’t have let me.

“Wait; the trip she went on that you funded for her birthday? You spoil her, Loki,” she says, voice riddled with distaste. She sat up in bed. I rolled my eyes.

“Bryleigh, she’s going to be my best woman.” I pulled on my shoe and grabbed my keys on the nightstand. “You better get used to the godmother of your children being around my house.” Bryleigh gaped, looking at me with an offense with an origin I couldn’t place.

“What?” I ask.

“Since when is that bi—” I cut her off, giving her a glare. Good feeling gone. I truly adored my fiancée, but I simply could not stand it when she picked on (Y/N). Especially when she did that.

“Biiiiii-eautiful woman I have adopted as my sister,” I say, narrowing my eyes. “I’m sick of you acting like a jerk to her.”

Bryleigh flopped back down. I kissed her forehead goodbye. “If you loved me, Loki, you’d see she's just evil!” She smiled softly and tiredly. I rolled my eyes.

“Evil? That is a new one,” I comment, kissing her and rushing out the door. Before our bedroom door closed, I heard her scoff. Something in me stirred, both at the thought of Bryleigh making nasty statements about (Y/N), and (Y/N) herself.

-----skip-----

“Flight from [Place you've wanted to visit] now unloading at Platform 9.”

The PA announcements seemed to fly by since the time I got there, but that one I paid attention to. I was almost eager to find her. I was speeding past every person I passed, even doing 360s to see if I could locate her. Her smile, her hands, ruffling her hair.

I passed through crowds, hearing the TSA yelling at someone, kids crying—or was it the other way around?— and twisting and weaving through people to Platform 9. “Where could she be?” I whisper to myself.

Something about all this turning reminded me about going to the Forest of Ydraggsil. But without all the fright; just really confusing and overwhelming and something missing. I didn’t mind. My heart was pounding with excitement. (Y/N) would be in this building somewhere.

“Loki!” I heard her call. I got reminded of my dream, but it didn’t scare me as much as it should have.

I whipped around, beaming when I saw her. She had a rolling suitcase and messy hair; she must have fallen asleep on the plane. I ran to her, lifting her up. She dropped her suitcase as I held her. I spun her with glee.

“You missed me that much, Loki?” She wrapped her arms around my neck, standing closely when I set her down. It was probably because my arms were still around her. (Y/N)’s hands rested within my elbows as she unwrapped her arms.

“Of course, I missed you. Who do you take me for?” I laughed softly, my head spinning slightly as I realized just how tired I was. I also realized that I didn’t care. About anything.

I didn’t care about how mad I had made Bryleigh. I didn’t care about the time. I just wanted. . . .

Oh, no.

But I just couldn’t stop smiling. (Y/N) was the only thing I could see. I was here, with her, no where else.

“I kinda took you for a stubborn prince,” she joked, hands moving again to my shoulders. “You know, the kind that didn’t pick favorites without doing it so subtly, and throwing knives, and doing favors reluctantly. Not picking up your secretary because she asked you to at three in the morning and taking you away from your fiancée.”

“I don’t care what she thinks,” I blurt. She blushed, and so did I. But I stupidly kept going. “I don't want to marry her.”

She stepped out of my arms. “Loki, what are you talking about?” I grew idiotically confident, taking her hands. “Loki?”

“I was such a fool,” I laugh, looking at her. I press the heel of my hand to my forehead. “I’m not in love with her.”

It was all clicking into place, now. The constant dreams of looking for her. The wedding dreams, too, with her in white. It wasn’t just paranoia. And all the times I would feel that awful knot in my gut when she spoke of other men. I gaze into her eyes.

“It’s you.”

She shook her head, “Loki, I — I can’t just—”

“(Y/N) you can’t pretend that you don’t feel this,” I continue. I bring her luggage out with her. “Actually, it all makes sense now.” But as much as I’m grinning, she’s only standing in shock.

“Darling?”

Your POV

Okay. Seeing Loki was already amazing. But now you were sure that one of you had gone crazy, or that you were dreaming.

“What? Loki, you can’t just say things like that!” You felt your face heat up at the delirious Loki’s practically random confession. Your hands and legs were shaking. Yes, you loved him, too, but what about Bryleigh? They had sent wedding invitations already!

“Why not? Better now than in a month, (Y/N),” he said. He opened the door for you. You got in his car. He definitely looked crazed, loopy. But he was happy.

You study him for a second, a thought coming to light almost immediately. He seemed carefree, distracted. He revved up the engine and grinned at you. You knew exactly what he seemed like to you, now that you thought on it.

He was like a bachelor.

“You didn’t!” you gasp. “You didn’t break up with her, did you?!”

“No, but I will. Even if you decide you don’t want me as a friend or a romantic partner. The only person who I can imagine marrying would be you.” He laughs, driving you to your house. You gape at Loki. He really had gone mad.

Not only was he head over heels with you out of the blue, he thought he would marry you. Or, at least he wanted to. Your heart sank.

It all made sense now.

“Loki,” you say quietly. “I’m seeing Steve. From economics.” You ducked your head. He loved you. And you couldn’t see him as anything more than a friend, or a brother. You fiddled with your shirt’s hem.

Loki frowned some, but quickly regained his smile. Except it was fake. You could tell so easily. You shifted in the passenger seat, watching cars pass by. “Oh,” he whispers. “I understand.” You hated this, but you really preferred not to lie.

“I’m so sorry, Loki,” you mumbled. You hugged yourself. You wanted him happy, but you couldn’t be with him. It was the worst kind of lie. “We became an item about three weeks back but I asked him to keep quiet about it. I didn't want to cause any gossip.”

Loki nodded. “No, I totally understand. . . . I was meant to be alone. It’s fate.” His bottom lip quivered. You felt your heart break for your best friend. Then you wondered if he had been dreaming again. He had nightmares that Bryleigh made worse, and you were the only one he could tell them about. Really tell. You felt warm inside. He really was in love with you. 

“Loki—,” you try.

“My immortal life was just . . . the worst. Now my mortal one is mirroring it,” he sighs. He gripped the wheel. Tightly. You saw his knuckles turn paper white. “I became cursed by the Norns. I made a mistake.”

“Loki, please, I am sure that you will find someone who will love you,” you try. You felt something in the back of your head tell you that this was a mistake, letting him go. But it was fate. You knew it. Loki was someone you felt for in the past. Never again.

“You know who I want,” he says. “This time, I won’t settle for something lesser.” He stared at the road. “I’m not getting any younger.”

Something lesser?

“Loki, really,” you sigh, “I’m not fantastic.”

“Steve sure thinks you are.”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

You growl, “That's low, even for you.” Loki doesn’t answer, just scoffing quietly.

You huff and cross your arms. Fiddle with the seat belt. “Just marry Bryleigh, okay? What do I care!” That came out harsher than you meant. Oops.

Loki pulled the car over so roughly you almost hit your head on the window. “Excuse me?” He turned to you. “What did you mean by that?” You felt your heart speed, but you had already turned him down.

“Just—take—me—home,” you say through gritted teeth.

“Tell me what that was about,” he protested. Loki rested his arm on the middle compartment, making you face him. Now you wanted to get mad at him and yourself. But he wasn’t your life, and he wasn’t ever going to be yours.

So who cared?

“It meant nothing,” you lie. “Nothing at all.” You shift in your seat, again. Look away from him. All the feelings you used to feel came rushing back, but without the affection they used to hold. You felt bitter about loving him before. A man who was engaged to be married. Now he could feel it, too. 

“Oh, sure. You never told me you didn’t want me married, (Y/N).” He had flipped a switch. He went from giddy to hurt within seconds. But saying something as sudden and intimate as “I don’t want you to get married but I’m seeing someone else” would have to hurt anyone.

“Because at least you were happy, Loki!”

“I wasn’t, you knew that!”

“I don’t want to fight about your witch fiancée,” you grumble. “Take me home, Loki. I’ll resign in the morning.” You sit back, watching through the window the rest of the ride. This would need to be solved, but in what way, you didn’t know.

------------(:V)------------

You stepped out into a clearing. You saw Loki dressed in his armor—something he hadn’t worn since New York. Green smoke billowed around your feet. You couldn’t move anything, no matter how much you tried to run and help him. He was screaming about being sorry, apologizing to whomever was laughing and telling him he’d never know love.

You couldn’t scream. Couldn’t get him. You wanted him.

“Please, I just want someone—!” He was cut off by his own cry of fright. He fell to the ground. You hated feeling so helpless. No. No, you needed to help him. The smoke surrounding the both of you covered Loki, and then—

You sat up, horrified. You were going to be late. Loki would—

Loki. Right. You had fought with him the night before. He probably wouldn’t want to see you. . . . Unless that was a dream. Again. You sigh. No matter what you had told him last night, you weren’t seeing Steve. And you were in love with him.

You picked up the phone. There was only really one thing to do.

“Hello?” he answered tiredly. He sounded like someone who had been crying, or losing significant amounts of sleep. He also had a tone of worry in his voice. You felt your heart skip.

“I love you,” you say. You were rushing to get the wires out. “I don’t want you to marry Bryleigh. I’m sorry for everything I told you last night and I don’t care if you remember none of it; you deserve to know. I’m in love with you, I always have been, Bryleigh is and always was someone who was just so much better than I am, and even though I think you two can be happy together, I want you to myself!”

Just before you hang up from fear of his long silence, he says, “Wait, wait. You said you were seeing Steve. . . . I’m so confused. . . . Bryleigh walked out last night, calling the wedding off, anyway. I’m not getting married.”

You sat there for a minute. “What? Why?”

“Apparently I spent more time talking about you than she liked,” he explained. “But I’m not sure if I should anymore?”

“No. No, Loki, that’s great. I mean—it’s not great, but you didn’t have to break up with her. . . . I just . . . spent so long thinking about what you said. You were right: it is fate.”

He sniffs on the other end. “You picked a fantastic time to tell me, (Y/N).” He laughed. “For the record: I think you’re right. It is fate.”

[auroralightsthesky]

Radio One (Manny x OC)

Summary: On Guadalcanal Manny learns for the first time what his girlfriend and her brothers actually are capable of

Manny peered through the binoculars into the distance at the smoking ruin of forest and clearing. How the hell had the Navy managed to miss their target when it was less than a mile in front of them?

“Goddamnit,” he hissed. “Ellos estan ahi!”

“I know,” John answered. “They’re there.......right fuckin there and we can see them.” 

“Give me the binoculars,” Tess told him, pushing a lock of her pitch black hair out of her face.

Manny handed her the binoculars and she saw for herself. “Goddamnit, they should have shelled the shit out of that. That’s a Jap ammunition dump.” 

“And it’s sitting right in fucking front of us,” JP groaned. “Fuckin Navy.” 

Tess thought for a moment, mulling over a brilliant little germ of an idea in her head. It was a wild idea, but she was sure it would work. “Back to camp,” she said. “I’ve got an idea.”

The guys all gave each other a look, cocking their eyebrows in confusion. Of course Tess was a completely capable nurse, but whatever idea she had in mind, they hoped that it wouldn’t get them killed. They trusted Tess for sure, but when she tended to get ideas like this, she kept them under such tight wraps that they could never guess what she was thinking or how said idea would be put into action. 

Back to the small camp they went and into her tent where a small TBX radio sat on a table, waiting for use. Tess switched it on, fiddling with the wires and the small, square microphone on the end of a coiled black wire. A few crackles, blips and beeps and finally a voice that none of them recognized. 

“Tessie what are you doin?” Manny asked. 

“Leave it to me Manny,” she said. “I’ve got this.” 

As soon as a male voice came over the radio, Tess began to speak in words none of them had ever heard of. To them, it seemed strange, a mish-mosh of words that didn’t make any sense.......at least not to them. 

“To-kus-dan A-kwe-eh, Tsah A-Kha Da-Nes-Tsa D-Ah Tse-Gah... Ne-Ahs-Jah Ma-E.....Beh-Na-Ali-Tsosie Beh-Eli-Doh-Be-Cah-Ali-Tas-Ai Nal-Yeh-Hi......A-Ye-Shi.......Shil-Loh!”

Just seconds later, John, JP and Manny heard a plane buzzing overhead. The whistle of a bomb dropping in the wind send a shiver down their backs as a huge *BOOM!* exploded in the distance with a cloud of fiery orange, red and black bursting into the sky. The boys jumped a bit, their jaws dropping in shocked awe. as the ground rumbled beneath their feet. 

“I.......Tessie......how did you.....?” Manny stuttered. 

“Just a little something I picked up from my older brothers,” she said with a mischievous grin. 

Manny, still slackjawed, ran right to her and kissed her full on the lips. “Baby I have no idea what the hell you just said,” he said. “But you’re fucking amazing!!” 

“I try,” she replied happily. 

(Tess’s Message: Approximate spot, north of Japan ammunition supply, bomb immediately) Yes I’m doing my term paper on the Navajo Code Talkers cuz they’re fuckin badass. If you wanna read more about Manny x Tess, there will be plenty more to come in the future. 😁😁😁😁

[sojourner-between-worlds]

Burn the Ships, Chapter One

Summary: All in all, this mission could have ended a lot worse than spending Christmas with Hawaii’s elite task force.

Fandoms: Alex Rider/Hawaii Five-0

A/N: Oh look. My hand slipped. For the record, I never said I was actually good at writing and this fought me, so it is what it is, ha. I’m better at angst and emotional drama, but the action parts of this are necessary, too, so... *shrugs*

I...don’t really have a specific season in mind for this to take place during, but it’s somewhere in 5-7.5 because I love Kono and Chin and Max but also Lou and Jerry, so there’s that. Also disregards Never Say Die for what will be obvious reasons (if you’ve read it) once we get a few chapters in, haha. . . .

Chapter One

Standing in an interrogation room with a soggy teenaged boy handcuffed to the chair was definitely not how Steve had anticipated spending his Christmas Eve, but, he supposed, there probably were worse places he could be right now.

A little before five that morning, a boat had exploded just off the coast. The Coast Guard had responded immediately, spotting said teen swimming away from the wreck. There had been no other survivors, and when HPD couldn’t get him to talk, they’d called Five-0 in, hoping Steve would have more luck.

Steve sighed. He’d been here for a half-hour already and had gotten nowhere. The kid was staring passively at his bare feet and resolutely ignoring Steve.

“You know you’re not actually in trouble right now, right? I mean, the only reason you’re handcuffed is because you almost knocked out a member of the Coast Guard, and we can write that off as momentary panic. The only reason you’re stuck here with me is because you won’t talk to anyone. You’re the only one who knows what happened out there, so just tell me and then both of us can get out of here. It’s Christmas Eve, after all. There’s gotta be somewhere you’d rather be. Me, personally? I’m supposed to be helping my partner, Detective Williams, get his house ready for our annual Christmas party. I need to pick up a few last-minute things from the store, then head over to start setting up by myself until he and his daughter get done with this beach clean-up thing they do every year. Between you and me, he’s not gonna be a happy camper if he gets there before I do. So if you could help me out, that’d be really great actually.”

Stone-cold silence descended over the room again. Steve let it sit for only a moment before he spoke again, tone bordering on exasperated.

“Okay, kid. What’s it gonna take, huh? Name it. What will it take for you to just tell me what happened?”

The teenager shifted in his chair, handcuffs clanking lightly against the metal chair. When he spoke, his voice was eerily calm and cold. “I don’t talk to cops.”

The kid’s heavy British accent didn’t escape Steve, but he was willing to set that aside for the moment. “Well, that’s perfect, then. I’m not a cop -- never went to the academy, myself; I got my training as a Navy SEAL. So tell me what happened.”

Steve knew he finally had the teen’s attention when his head snapped up, finally meeting his gaze. He didn’t trust cops, but he trusted the military, maybe? Steve couldn’t be sure, but if it got the kid talking, that’s all he really cared about at the moment.

He frowned. “You still have a badge, though.”

“Yeah, well, the Five-0 task force still isn’t strictly police. We operate a little differently.” Steve paused. “Look, if you’re worried about who you can trust, I’m promising you right now that you can trust me, okay?”

“Words mean nothing.”

“No, you’re right, but I have over ten years of active service in the Navy, six of those as a SEAL, that show I can be.”

Silence weighed heavily over them again, but this time Steve let it. He had to wait it out now, let the kid have time to decide if could trust him or not. If he decided not to -- well, there was nothing else Steve could do about that.

Several long minutes passed before the teen’s quiet voice filled the vacant space. “It maybe wasn’t entirely an accident. I may have rigged an explosive near the fuel tank and jumped overboard before it detonated.”

“Why?”

He shrugged. “I couldn’t let it get to port.”

“Okay. How come?”

“You wouldn’t believe how many kilos of illegal narcotics they had. I don’t know exactly what it was, just that it was something new -- something highly addictive. I wasn’t about to let it get here. That’s all.”

“And you wouldn’t just call it in because you don’t trust cops, right?”

“Yeah. Heard them talking about an ‘inside man’. Can’t say if they meant in HPD or not, but…” He shrugged. “Better safe than sorry.”

“Right.” Steve paused. “Okay, so here’s the million-dollar question, then: what were you doing on that boat? You obviously weren’t working for them since you kind of sunk their product to the bottom of the Pacific.”

“Yeah, well --” he breathed a shaky sigh -- “that’s a very long and unpleasant story, and I believe you said you had somewhere to be, so…”

At that moment, Steve’s phone vibrated in his pocket. Seeing the caller ID, he didn’t hesitate to answer. “Max. What have you got?” He listened intently for a moment as his friend and colleague filled him in on the identities of the bodies pulled from the wreckage before hanging up and turning back to the kid. “That was our chief medical examiner. He got hits on the IDs of the other two bodies from the boat. Turns out they’ve got pretty deep ties in the underworld, so I can’t say I’m sorry you took them out to be honest.”

“Wait, wait -- two bodies?”

“Yeah, why?”

He shook his head, face paling. “No, that’s wrong. There were five of us on that boat.”

“So you’re telling me that two more potentially got away somehow?”

“Yes. Since the bodies haven’t been recovered already, I can practically guarantee they’re still alive somewhere. And there’s another thing: those drugs were sealed air-tight. So if they got away, it’s possible they got away with their product -- or some of it, at least.”

There goes Christmas Eve, Steve thought as he pulled his phone back out to call his team in.

. . .

“Alright, let’s go. Let’s stop this thing hopefully before it starts.”

As the rest of the team split off to their duties, Steve stayed standing at the holotable, watching as Jerry pulled open the door and made his way over.

“You wanted to see me?”

“Yeah. Thanks for coming in. I’ve, uh, got a job for you, but I’d prefer it if you would keep this quiet for now.”

“Of course. What’s up?”

“I need you to run a name for me, through missing persons and maybe TSA -- see if you get a hit on a passport possibly. Unfortunately, all I’ve got for you is a first name -- Alex -- and a description.” He took a folded sheet of paper from his pocket and set it on the table between them. “Find out as much as you can, please.”

Jerry picked up the page and glanced down at the scrawling handwriting. “Can I ask what your interest is? I mean, I thought you caught a case, and this seems irrelevant?”

“It’s not entirely. This kid is the reason we’re working today at all. Something just… doesn’t seem right. There’s definitely more to this than what he’s told me -- granted, he hasn’t said much at all, but…” He paused. “I just have this gut feeling I’m not going to like what you find.”

. . . . . Tag list: @diekatimitdemhutohnehut (If you’d like added/removed, let me know!)

[misterelguapo]

HELP!

Anybody have an experience flying without an ID?

I lost mine a while back and the replacement from the DMV has apparently been lost in the mail as they told me yesterday that they mailed it about three weeks ago.

I want to fly to the East Coast in about ten days, but I'm hesitant to book my flights and my hotel on the chance that maybe I won't be allowed to fly.

I called the TSA today and the lady I spoke to said that this situation is one the top things they get called about and that I am almost guaranteed to be allowed to fly if I bring a few things. I've got an older ID, the receipt for my new ID, credit card bills, etc… She even mentioned prescription medication bottles (I have one because of my massive heart exploding blood pressure problem 👍).

Unfortunately, I don't have a passport which would make this a hell of a lot easier.

So, any experience with this situation? Were you allowed to fly? What did you provide for the screening? Was it a huge shit show?

Any info on experience with this situation would be appreciated. I'm hoping to book everything this weekend depending on how confident I feel about being allowed to fly.

[qqueenofhades]

Well I don’t know about your other TSAS readers but I need a cigarette, a cold shower, and Flynn’s POV on that life altering sex. Wow! I can die.

Anonymous said: Is there a line for ferocious starving kisses against doors? Wall sex? Tearing off clothes sex? Asking for a friend.

Aha. As we could all guess, Flynn will have other things on his mind just now, and we may have to wait for him to get a chance to realize what is going on and that his past self has turned up and that it is a clusterfuck on multiple levels. Because Gabriel may have officially out-Garbaged Season 1 Flynn, which is a dubious achievement that absolutely nobody should strive to replicate. 

However, let us ignore the incoming shitstorm and focus on the fact that yes, we actually got multiple instances of smut this chapter, which may indeed be a first. Let’s hope it does not take another 470,000 cumulative words to happen again, and that they get at least one more chance to enjoy it before TSAS is over.

Sigh. Someone just... whisk Flynn and Lucy away and throw a shiny thing that explodes to distract the Disaster Duo. It may be our best bet.

[180abroad]

Seattle & PodCon 2 (Special Post)

For this post, I wanted to share a more recent adventure of mine. This past weekend, I flew up to Seattle to attend a podcast convention. I went with my friend Heidi (@electricabyss), who actually suggested it to me while I was in Europe with Jessica last year.

We landed at SeaTac early Friday afternoon. The flight was quick and easy, and we didn't have any trouble getting through security despite the ongoing government shutdown affecting the TSA. Getting from the airport into town proved simple--if not exactly speedy--by taking the super-affordable Link train from the airport to the main downtown train station, which dropped us off just a few blocks from the convention center and our Airbnb.

Heidi had never used Airbnb before, so I got to share a bit of my knowledge and experience from using it extensively in Europe. I'd managed to find us a very nice place right around the corner from the convention center and considerably cheaper than a double room at the convention center hotel.

After a slightly awkward check-in process, we set out to do some sightseeing. We wouldn't have much free time during the weekend, so we went straight for the place we most wanted to see: Chihuly Garden and Glass.

I was vaguely aware of Chihuly as an artist who created beautiful and extravagant glass installations, and Heidi, being an artist, was very aware of who he is. The museum is clustered together with many other interesting museums right next to the iconic Space Needle.

The museum, which was a pricey but tolerable $25, starts with a quick introduction to Dale Chihuly's career, starting with glass interpretations of Native American basket and blanket designs and moving on to his increasingly stylized and larger-than-life works.

After passing under the gorgeous Persian Ceiling, we saw the truly amazing Mille Fiori (Italian for "thousand flowers").

After some more stunning pieces, we came to Chihuli's Ikebana and Niijima floats, featuring boats loaded with floral and sphere motifs, respectively. We found the Niijima float especially tranquil and calming to look at.

On the wall opposite from the floats hangs a series of "Burned Drawings"--mixed media artworks created by Chihuly after he lost the use of one eye in a glass-blowing accident and had to relinquish much of the grunt work to his apprentices. He turned to drawing as a way to channel his visions into reality, using paints, metallic pigments, charcoal, and even an acetylene torch to create some truly unique mixed-media effects.

Yet another amazing display was the Macchia Forest--a series of scalloped bowls made using all 300 colors in Chihuly's workshop.

Moving outside, we wandered through the magnificent gardens, filled with colorful glass tendrils rising from the ground like a beautiful alien invasion.

At the center of the museum is the Glasshouse, which houses one of the largest and most complex suspended installations Chihuly has ever made. It looks like one continuous string of exploding flowers, but from the side we could see that it was actually composed of many smaller pieces cleverly hung together to give the impression of continuity.

And faintly visible through the ceiling, the iconic Space Needle towered directly over us.

Before we left, we got to see a live glassblowing demonstration by a team of three museum employees. They were using a mobile workshop converted from a vintage Airstream trailer.

It was fascinating to watch them work, and the darkening evening made the glow of the molten glass all the more spectacular. Even though they were only creating a simple cylindrical vase, we were enthralled to see them start with a small, egg-sized ball of molten glass and expand and shape it, adding bits of clear and colored glass along the way.

It was especially impressive to see the way the team worked together with practiced ease, each anticipating and preparing for the others' needs.

After the show, we took one last look into the gardens, then headed over to the Space Needle gift shop, where all of the artwork made by the glassblowing demonstrations is put up for sale.

We made our way to the Armory, a food court in the center of the museum plaza. Most of the restaurants were already closed despite it being early evening on a Friday, but we stuck around since we were meeting up with some of Heidi's old college friends. Afterward, we went home on the monorail, which exists solely to connect the museum plaza with the main train station downtown.

That night, as I tried to sleep on the pullout couch, I was reminded just how nice it is to sleep in a real bed.

The rest of the weekend was dominated by PodCon.

It was the second annual PodCon convention, featuring the Green and McElroy family podcasting empires, as well as a host of other great podcasters including--but far from limited limited to--Roman Mars of 99% Invisible, Helen Zaltzman of The Allusionist, Ross and Carrie of Oh No Ross & Carrie, the Hannahs Hart and Gelb of Hannahlyze This, and Cecil Baldwin, Jeffrey Cranor, Joseph Fink, Symphony Sanders, Dylan Marron, and Meg Bashwiner of Welcome to Nightvale.

Heidi and I were mainly fans of the various McElroy and McElroy-adjacent podcasts, but we were excited to discover new great podcasts and podcasters as well.

Saturday started with a fun opening ceremony. Highlights included listening to Hank Green and Travis McElroy talking about being dads of toddlers, Cecil Baldwin encouraging us all to take a break and appreciate floors, and Griffin McElroy passing on the crown of “cronching.”

Next, we saw a live performance of Oh No Ross & Carrie, which Heidi hadn't seen before. Ross talked about his experiment to see if their ban from Scientology had reached this far north, then they covered a Seattle ghost tour they'd taken the night before. There had been a bit of a mix-up with regard to the question of whether there would be a projector in the meeting room, but Carrie kindly kept us apprised of just how much we would have enjoyed the pictures they'd taken.

It was everything I'd hoped for.

We managed to get into a meet and greet with the Smirl sisters of Still Buffering, including Sydnee McElroy, who also hosts the medical history podcast Sawbones with her husband Justin McElroy, of My Brother, My Brother, and Me and The Adventure Zone. (Confused yet?)

I was able to get my copy of The Sawbones Book signed by Sydnee and Teylor, who did the book's fantastic artwork, and Heidi was able to have a very brief chat with Teylor about art school and continuing to do art even when you don't end up being able to make a full-time living off of it.

All three of them were incredibly sweet and wholesome.

After that, we saw a live performance of Buffering the Vampire Slayer, which neither of us had seen before. Hosted by the formerly married Kristin Russo and Jenny Owen Youngs, each episode recaps an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, reveling in its silly awesomeness while also appreciating its relevance to ongoing social, political, and LGBTQ issues. Even having never seen the episode they were recapping, it was very entertaining and accessible.

Last two shows of the night were Still Buffering and My Brother, My Brother, and Me, the two shows we had been most excited to see. They were both very fun, and the episodes have already been posted this week.

After day's events were over, we took an Uber over to Pair, a fine Franco-Mediterranean tapas restaurant in the university district where another of Heidi's old friends works. The food was absolutely delicious, and for dessert Heidi's friend prepared a special "raindrop cake."

It was… interesting.

The second day of the convention, we saw three panels: one on podcasting with family (featuring Teylor and Riliegh Smirl), one on dealing with anxiety and depression as a comedic entertainer (featuring Justin McElroy), and one on telling complex stories in a simple and accessible way (featuring Sydnee McElroy). The last panel also introduced us to the delightful Helen Zaltzman of The Allusionist, a non-prescriptivist podcast about the charms and foibles of the ever-evolving English language.

We also got to meet Clint McElroy, father of the McElroy brothers, co-host of The Adventure Zone, and author of the Adventure Zone graphic novels. He was a surprise guest on the family panel and was more than happy to lead his "disciples" out into the hallway afterward for book signings, photo ops, and fatherly hugs. Like everyone else we met, he was incredibly kind and respectful.

Taking a break, we walked down to the Pike Place Market for lunch. We got chicken katsu and a chocolate and strawberry crepe, both of which were among the tastiest either of us had ever had. We also checked out Golden Age Collectibles, which is apparently the world's oldest comic shop.

Last big show of the convention was Sawbones, where Justin and Sydnee talked about auriculotherapy--a pseudoscientific practice similar to reflexology that claims you can cure just about any ailment just by applying the right pressure, vibration, or radiation to specific pressure points in the ear.

The con ended with a wonderful closing performance. Highlights included an experiment to record an entire ten-episode podcast season in ten minutes (One Question, With Allegra Frank), Roman Mars and Justin McElroy conversing through prerecorded sound bites, and a hilarious and terrifying game where four podcasters had to compete to say catchphrases while wearing a dental mouthpiece. Carrie Poppy handily won, then proceeded to deliver an amazingly drawn-out and over-the-top victory speech--while still wearing the mouthpiece.

I’ve never been much of a convention person. I don’t like crowds, and I don't have a deep-seated desire to share my obscure obsessions with total strangers. Liking the same thing is good fuel for a friendship, but I don't see it as a basis for one. Still, getting to see the live performances and panels was a thrill, and it was truly touching to see people enjoy themselves and revel in their weirdness in a way that they probably don't feel free to in their regular lives.

All in all, it was a fantastic weekend and a much-needed break from the busy holiday work season. I have to say that, while our Airbnb experience was quite positive, in retrospect I probably would have stayed at the hotel instead. It was cheaper than a hotel, but not that much cheaper. Close to the convention center, but still a bit of a walk. And we didn't really have time to take advantage of the kitchen or any of the other amenities. Having a larger space and separate rooms was the main benefit, but the beds really weren't that great.

Anyway, we had a great time, and the trip home was as easy and uneventful as our flight over. In fact, the TSA agents were unnervingly friendly and cheerful--an experience I'd never encountered before in a US airport.

[ageekyreader]

The Whirlwind That Hit My Life

I finally have enough time and energy to sit down and share about my life exploding in a whirlwind. I would have before but, ya know, whirlwind. Ok, actually I did start writing it up a few days ago, but I didn’t get very far and it kinda looks like I wrote while my brain was all melty. Which I did. Hah. So here is the revised and updated version. It’s at least 10% less brain melty. ;)

Thursday was scheduled to be my day I packed to get ready for our SoCal trip I had done a few things the day before, but not as much as I had hoped. Packing is always a little complicated when you have health issues, and since I hadn’t been on a plane in several years I ended up spending a good hour of that scouring the TSA website to make sure I didn’t screw anything up.

On a normal day I take a nap. Thursday I was extra wiped because I hadn’t slept well the night before and trying to pack and figure things out just added to it. I tried to take an early nap to compensate, but it didn’t really work. Mostly I dozed.

It turns out it was a “good thing” I couldn’t sleep cuz I got back up earlier than planned and found Mom in the middle of our Internet being a Problem™

(The rest of the story is under the cut - it’s a little over 1000 words total)

I’m not entirely sure what things went wrong and when. I do know that Mom was trying to switch out the old modem for a new one, and that she had a customer service rep on the phone to help her. Should be simple right? Yeah, it probably should have been. It probably would have been if either Mom or I had remembered to make sure she knew the relevant passwords … and if the tech support person she got could keep the terms “modem” and “router” straight. If you are support tech for an internet provider you would think that’s a basic piece of knowledge you are required to have.

Mom had been on the phone for an hour when I joined in. It took two and a half hours to resolve after I started helping, and in the end it took first me, then my brother, to untangle the giant knot in the technology. (yup, I’m using real technical descriptions here)

Yeah, so by the time that was over my brain was pretty melty.

Except that’s not all. I had been pretty drowsy when I got back up. I had gotten a cup of coffee and was trying to figure out what was going on with Mom when I got a text. It was my best friend saying, “Hey, you know how my roomie and I are hoping to move? Well, we found a four bedroom and we were wondering if you want to join us? We need to know by Sunday and the move would be in thirty days.”

I wasn’t expecting to start seriously looking for moving opportunities for another year.

It’s all happening so fast because Mel and her roomie are dealing with having smokers living downstairs. They can’t open their windows or run their AC because the apartment fills with smoke. Not good when you live on the third floor and don’t react well to smoke. Their landlord said they could get out of their lease break fee if they put in the paperwork this weekend and give thirty days notice.

This resulted in a mad scramble in the few moments where I wasn’t actively playing IT Girl to see if I could afford to move now. Or afford to move into this living situation period. Oh yeah, and to make sure nothing was going to get screwed with my disability income.

Figuring out the last part took five phone calls over the course of the hour and a half we had before the offices closed, and then the hour they opened the next day before I left for the airport. Actually, we didn’t figure out exactly what the requirements were for sure until I was at the airport and about to get in line to go through TSA. Then we found out that it wasn’t going to be a problem anyway because we had added a fourth person to the mix so that dropped the rent low enough that I can just barely afford it.

Let’s recap where we are at this point because that was a lot of stuff all going on at once: I hadn’t slept well the night before, I’d spent the morning working on getting ready for the trip the next day, my nap failed, I spent a couple hours playing IT Girl, and also was desperately trying to figure out if I could move. Oh, and one more thing, my sister-in-law brought the kids over for dinner that night. At least that part was awesome even if it did add to the over all exhaustion levels.

Also - I hate making phone calls. Haaate it. Let’s just say I was very, very thankful for my anxiety meds.

This brings us up through Friday morning at the airport. Travel is hard for me because of my various health problems and having this all go down in the twenty four hours prior to leaving did not help in the slightest. I might have had a panic attack in the middle of going through TSA. Ok, I did have a panic attack. Thank the stars for my Mom and for, ya know, meds. Also? Coffee. Coffee helps many things.

I still don’t know for sure if it’s going to happen. The rest of the weekend was full of texts sent back and forth in-between family time and sleeping whenever I had a chance. All four of us have our applications in, and we are just waiting to find out if we can put the deposit down and if there are going to be any other complications. It’s first come based on deposit not application - and you can’t put the deposit down until you have a provisional acceptance based on your application. They don’t have to have the full background check done first I think, but they do have to have had a chance to review the applications and a couple of the basics.

We were hoping to find out yesterday but that didn’t happen because apparently one of the other girls hadn’t gotten her app in until last night. So I might find out tomorrow, or we might have to wait until Friday. If it all works out money is going to be tight, but when the government thinks you can live off $750 a month*, yeah money is pretty much always going to be tight.

I’ll let you all know as soon as I know ;) Lots more to share about the trip itself, but that can wait for a different post. Several different posts actually. I generally try to keep my posts shorter than this one turned out lol

*The current maximum payment for SSI for a single person Also - they have crazy rules that make things really tricky about using and saving your money. It’s a nightmare. At least I have something to live off of but yeeeesh.

Want to see more posts about the trip this whirlwind led into? Check out my SoCal Trip tag!

[nickgerlich]

20

Twenty years ago today, we woke up to what would be just another day. In every regard, it was. Monday mornings can be hectic getting back into the swing of things, but America was ready to tackle another week of work. That was our spirit; it’s what had propelled generations to keep working, for ourselves and the good of the nation.

Little did we know then what would happen the next day on the 11th. What we took for granted that Monday, would be turned upside down in only 24 hours. And our lives would never be the same.

It’s hard to believe that 20 years have passed. The day we know as 911 is forever etched in my memory. I know exactly what I was doing when it started happening. All of my contemporaries do as well. It was one of those significant events of such magnitude that you could never forget...like when the space shuttle Challenger exploded, or when JFK was killed.

Yeah, I remember those too.

But enough time has passed that the vast majority of my undergraduate students have no memory whatsoever of 911. If they had been born, they were likely so young as to not be aware of what was going on. Even among my MBA students, I bet a sizeable number have no recollections either, unless they were born in 1996 or before.

I hope that the significance of that tragic day is not lost on present and future generations. After all, if you didn’t live it, how could you possibly know what to feel? I wasn’t around for Pearl Harbor, so I have no idea the gut-wrenching feelings Americans had then. I can only read about it, and if I am lucky, find someone still alive who could share what they were going through.

That’s a rapidly shrinking group of people. Better hurry.

When we woke up the next day, our nation was brought to its knees in the matter of one hour seventeen minutes. To wit:

--8:46am EDT Flight 11 crashed into World Trade Center Tower 1.

--9:03am EDT Flight 175 crashed into World Trade Center Tower 2.

--9:37am EDT Flight 77 crashed into the Pentagon.

--10:03am EDT Flight 93 crashed in a remote portion of Somerset County Pennsylvania.

I watched in horror. It was bad enough seeing the first one, which we initially thought was just a horrific accident. But when the second tower was hit only seventeen minutes later, we knew then this was no accident. It was an orchestrated attack.

If you think the COVID lockdown was a big deal, it was nothing in comparison to this. All flights were canceled in the days that followed. And we, stunned into speechless fear, stayed home. We didn’t know what to do other than mourn and worry that there would be more. Thankfully, there wasn’t.

As I look back on the last 20 years, I have seen many changes, including the erosion of privacy and convenience in the interest of public safety and national security. You cannot fly anywhere without you and your bags being X-rayed, having shed belts, shoes, bulky garments, and maybe just a few ounces of our trust in humanity.

But it goes far beyond our airports. We have become a nation of security cameras and eavesdropping. There is little we can do or say without someone seeing or hearing. It’s all being recorded and stored somewhere.

And the crazy part is for most of my students, they have known nothing otherwise. It is normal for them to disrobe in an airport, to suffer the indignity of a tap down, to only carry travel size containers with gels and liquids.

For the rest of us, though, it became the new normal, analogous to the new normal we are experiencing as we crawl out of the COVID wreckage. Kids born in 2020 or after will grow up with health and safety protocols, and probably won’t think twice when asked to wear a mask if they are ever needed to. The rest of us will summon memories of the Before Times, when we routinely shook hands, ate at buffets, and went to concerts.

Kind of like just showing up at the airport to go somewhere, and dragging your family with you all the way to the gate. Ah, those were the days. The Before Before Times.

In the interest of making this somewhat relevant for a Marketing class, I will add that many companies stepped up to the plate. They leveraged the available technology to offer households and businesses the same level of security systems that cities use today. They doubled down on travel size products that are TSA-approved. They improved mobile communication and devices so that everyone can have the capability of documenting anything that may look the least bit suspicious.

It’s a very different world today, and I will never forget how it was before as well as during and after 911. As tragic as it all was, it just affirmed for me how good we have it here, and that a gang of terrorists tried to take it all away. Yes, it sent us to our knees, but we have risen from those ashes. They hit us with their best shot, and we bounced back, more cautious and wary to be sure, but we bounced back with a vengeance. We’re not going down that easily.

May we all pause to remember 911 and its several thousand victims. May we accept the fact that while our lives have changed, we are a resilient people and have learned to roll with those changes. And may we all, regardless of whether we were around to witness and comprehend what happened that fateful day, know that we are bound by something far greater than the trappings of American society.

No, it’s something that runs in our blood. And you can’t kill that spirit.

Dr “Never Forget“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

[thehobbem]

Robbie's misadventures in America

After a magical week in Disney, what could possibly be waiting for hubby and I at the Orlando International Airport?

A bomb scare.

Or rather: "bomb" scare. Someone's camera battery freaking EXPLODED inside their bag, someone else got scared and yelled the B word, and lo and behold, mass hysteria. Everyone ran every other way (including, haha, the police), the whole place was (messily) evacuated and no one went in for almost an hour.

By the time we were actually allowed back in, the TSA line went on for MILES.

And that's when, haha, I realize: I left my phone inside the uber that had taken us to the airport.

My phone. With ALL of my Disney pictures in it (not to mention the pictures from my honeymoon, from 2 years ago, that I was too lazy to transfer to my computer or a cloud).

After I burst into tears for a couple of seconds, we reach an agreement: hubby would wait in line while I'd try to contact uber. Uber provides you with a Lost Item service, where they connect you with the driver in whose car you left said lost item. Great!

Except that I need to do it through my account, in-app, and I don't have the app because I DON'T HAVE MY PHONE.

So I use the shitty airport wifi to find some sort of uber help link, using hubby's phone. Uber asks you to provide a phone number for them to call you back - I have hubby's phone, but it's not an American number. And his phone doesn't have roaming service. (Mine does, but. That's the phone I DON'T HAVE ON ME RIGHT NOW.)

I walk into the nearest store - Kennedy Space Center store - and ask to use their phone. The 2 girls at the counter are WONDERFUL and help me through it all (while a little boy, cute as a button but who was obviously the spawn of the devil, wreaks havoc around the store, and his mother placidly watches, with an occasional, half-assed "no, don't do that". I helped the girls reorganize the store after Hurricane Little Boy). Uber calls me and contacts my driver, Jessie, who is this amazing guy who immediately says "yes, ma'am, you left your phone here. I'll take it to you right now", and I am suddenly convinced God is real.

Meanwhile, hubby is still in line for the TSA, and has made friends with two adorable older ladies from Ohio. They hit it off so well I was partially convinced he was gonna leave me for them - but that's fine, I had the two cashiers at the Kennedy Space Center anyway.

After almost two hours, Jessie shows up at the airport, looks for us in the middle of the sheer CHAOS that the place was still drowning in, finds my husband and gives him my phone. That's when the TSA line starts moving, and we finally make it to the plane. I even rewatched part of The Princess Bride on the flight, which is always, ALWAYS a plus.

Everything worked out! We got to Atlanta (where we'd get our connection) at around midnight.

EXCEPT that, because of the THREE HOUR DELAY in Orlando - thank you, Random Person Whose Battery Exploded And Scared An Entire Airport Into Evacuating, and fuck you - we missed our connection. We were rebooked, of course, but to a flight leaving at 7:45 PM the next day.

We slept at the airport, on a couple of chairs and using the giant stuffed Scooby-doo I bought at Universal as a pillow. Not the best night, I'll tell you that. Also: WHY IS ATLANTA SO COLD, GODDAMMIT. I feel personally attacked by the climate here.

Currently, at 9:30 in the morning, we have to wait another 10 hours for our flight back home.

In conclusion: I'm not terribly fond of Delta airlines or Atlanta right now.

But I will forever remember Jessie, the gentle giant Uber driver from Florida (who believes in dreams and spirituality, and hopes a certain president gets impeached soon); Caleigh, the girl from Winter Park, FL, who works at the Kennedy Space Center store at the Orlando International Airport (and also hopes a certain president gets impeached soon); Elaine, from Puerto Rico, who also works at the store (mother of three, and 100% DONE with Hurricane Little Boy); Eva and Susie, the two retired teachers from Ohio (who kept hubby company and cheered really hard when I got my phone back. Eva likes sudoku, and Susie wanted to rewatch Mary Poppins, but didn't remember her Apple password).

Thank you to all 5 of you for bringing lovely moments to an otherwise horrible night. It's people like you who make the difference.

[roslinadama-sinequanon]

Major Crimes Re-Watch-I, Witness

Not too many quotes in this analysis, there were way too many great one liners to get them all in. I always love the Flynn/Provenza episodes and IMO this is one of the better ones. You have a grumbling Andy, frustrated over his health issues and the pill his doctor wants to put him on, the money he’s spending on his daughter’s wedding and the fact that they want Nicole’s step-father to walk her down the aisle along with him—even though Andy is paying for everything and this guy isn’t putting in a dime. Provenza doesn’t get it—he just wants Andy to take the damn pill and shut up about the wedding. But, that’s Provenza, the easier the better. Also, Provenza doesn’t feel guilty about his kids childhoods, and he doesn’t have a daughter, just two sons and two stepdaughters, so he really can’t understand how Andy feels. Then we have all the humor with Lloyd, the witness to a murder whom  Andy and Provenza have to drop off at a motel. It’s hard to believe that any criminal could be as stupid and oblivious as Lloyd, but it did make for a funny episode. 

“Four weeks ago I fainted.” 

---and---

“High blood pressure. The doctor wants to put me on this pill. But the side effects could make me irritable, moody, quick to anger.” 

“Who would know the difference?” 

And now we know what is really behind Andy's new healthy living plan. It’s not just about wanting to look good for his physical; he has an actual health problem. Interesting that he was at his ex-wife’s arguing over the $30,000 she wants him to pay for the wedding when he fainted. She definitely raises his stress level and affects him in a very negative way. I’d love see these two and their dynamic as he really seems to dislike her immensely. 

So, having been taken off in an ambulance Andy is now forced to deal with the issue and his doctor wants to put him on a pill he doesn’t want to take. Instead, he wants to try to fix the blood pressure naturally. He lists about 10 things he's doing to do to get the BP under control, including going on a Mediterranean diet. Provenza can't understand why he's bothering to make that kind of effort when he could just take a pill, telling Andy "For God's sake Flynn I take 20 pills a day with three glasses of wine.” I wish they had gotten into Andy’s reasoning for not wanting to take the pill. I’m wondering if he has an aversion to any kind of medication because of his alcohol addiction, whether the pill is addictive or not, which is why he looks at more homeopathic remedies for when he is ill. 

"I just need less stress and my crazy ex-wife." 

Funny how Andy has gone from referring to his ex as obnoxious and crazy to speaking about her respectfully this past season. Is that part of the “Sharon effect”? Seeing what it was like to be the wife of an alcoholic and single motherhood through Sharon’s eyes maybe makes him a little more sympathetic to what his ex-wife went through.  

When Andy and Provenza go to pick up Lloyd for his day in court, they find the motel surrounded by police and hear that he is suspected of killing a store clerk. It’s an immediate “Oh crap” moment and they are on damage control, hoping against hope that he didn’t do it. 

"We were told to pick the creep up at the airport and drop him off at the motel and that's what we did!" 

Emma doesn't have a witness; she blames Flynn and Provenza and takes it to Sharon. This scene is more TC Andy than the more mellow guy we’ve gotten to know on MC. We haven’t seen Andy temperamental like this since episode 1 of MC. He's pissed and stressed and I love the way Sharon leans back in her chair and crosses her arms enjoying watching Andy and Provenza go at Emma then calmly bringing them all down. 

Rusty has a friend. 

A girl named Kris that evidently they thought was going to be a male “Chris”. Everyone appears to be shocked, especially Sharon. I’m going to be upfront and say that I never understood this. I don’t know what it was about Rusty that led everyone to believe that he was gay. I mean, yes, he had sex with men, but that was all about making money, it didn’t necessarily mean he was gay. 

“LAPD officers are not required to babysit your witnesses.”

“Unless they’re cute little blond boys in which case you adopt them. 

Funny line, but it was low blow Emma. She just really cannot let that go. 

"The dirtbag was getting off the plane, that's the TSA's job!"  

Andy is definitely defensive here. He knows he and Provenza shouldn’t have just assumed the TSA’s had done their jobs. Love the look on Sharon's face as Andy explodes at her. He hasn't been like this to her in a long time and you can see she is rather surprised and gives him a look that says "Hey, settle down, what the hell is this all about?" Andy's holistic remedies don't appear to be helping much as Provenza is right, he's irritable, moody and quick to anger and he's not even on the pill. 

“Thank you, it's nice to know that I have at least one friend here, Detective Lopez.” 

Poor Julio, he jumps to attention any time Emma enters the room and she still doesn't even know his name. Again, Emma doesn't really care about people at all, which is why she doesn’t bother to learn their names. 

“Uh badges, did you bring handcuffs too?” 

LOL, Flynn and Provenza with Shampagne the conversationalist /prostitute. This is just such a typical Provenza/Flynn episode. As milquetoast-on-acid said in her review, it’s quite telling that Sharon didn't have a problem sending Andy to interview a prostitute at this point, but later once they're a couple, she sends Mike. 

“Sharon do you need to know absolutely everything?”

“Well, yes, actually.” 

Sharon and Rusty have really become a typical mother and teenage son. Sharon is pumping him for information on this new friend who happens to be a female and Rusty is being close mouthed not understanding why she’s interested. 

“What is this?” 

Sharon catches Provenza and Buzz spying on Rusty and Kris in one of the interview rooms. That isn't surprising. What I found surprising is that after slightly chastising them, she too begins to spy on him as well. That just seems to be out of character for her. 

In this scene, we have Provenza and Sharon debating over whether Rusty will ask Kris out or not, Provenza is sure he will, Sharon is even more sure he won’t. Evidently, Rusty’s being gay is not something that Provenza has picked up on, but Sharon is darn sure.

"He did say threats." 

Sharon immediately caught on to Rusty saying there had been threats against him, not just a threat. Her radar is always sharp but this threat against Rusty is something that appears to be constantly on her mind. Provenza just passes it off as a guy exaggerating to make himself look even more courageous to get the girl but Sharon isn't buying that. 

“Oh really!”

“Really!”

“Really!” 

So, Andy passes out and the reaction is far different  from the season 4 finale. Julio is more interested in making eyes at Emma than helping Andy and has to be called over to him. Sharon does race out of her office, however, when we see Andy on the ground she is nowhere to be seen. Where did she go? 

“Somebody took me there once, I mean I took somebody and it was fun...for a little while.” 

The way Rusty said this made me so sad. For one moment, he was able to enjoy himself and just be a normal teenager, but then the movie was over and it got ugly because it ended up with him having to have sex with someone for money. 

In addition, Sharon, Provenza and Buzz are spying on him again. I just have such a hard time seeing Sharon doing this. She’s all about privacy and this is such an invasion of privacy, it would be like her reading Emily’s diary or something.  I don’t know, it just rubbed me wrong.

“When my daughter was Rusty's age she dated several boys from her ballet school. It didn't go so well.” 

Provenza doesn’t want to believe what Sharon is saying. I still don't get why she is so sure and what were the clues were. I guess I missed them completely. 

In the end, Provenza takes control of Andy’s health, threatening him with desk duty if he continues to resist taking the pill. He takes the pill.

[understandingchaoss]

What Traveling Is like with an Anxiety Disorder

I’m sure many of you think you have anxiety. Many of you are probably mistaken. Although most will experience what some kind of anxiety is like at some point in their lives, most that do are not actually diagnosed with an anxiety disorder.

I am not one of those people.

I’ve had anxiety for as long as I can remember. It worsened once I experienced trauma and transitioned into adulthood. Generalized anxiety disorder is an ongoing disorder that is persistent and excessive worry about a number of different things - mostly pointless things that the general population feels are nothing to worry about. Anxiety basically means that your body and your mind team up with each other and begin to prepare themselves for the absolute worst thing to happen; except that thing almost never occurs. 

There are many different anxiety disorders that stem from GAD, one of which being panic disorder. Panic disorder is a more specific anxiety disorder that typically does not have a trigger, unlike GAD. I experience panic attacks often - typically without a trigger - on top of the already existing anxiety. GAD and panic disorder being present at the same time have been extremely difficult because sometimes it’s hard to tell which symptoms come from which diagnosis. It’s hard to tell if my anxiety attacks are being caused from a flashback of trauma or not.

As many of you know, I travel often. I have seen 11 countries and 17 states. Yet, my psychiatrist has always told me that I have some of the worst cases of anxiety he has ever seen.

Let’s talk a little bit about what GAD is before we get into what traveling is like with that particular diagnosis.

The following should not be used for any kind of self-diagnosis. A diagnosis can only be performed upon seeing a medical or mental health professional:

GAD is diagnosed when a person finds it difficult to control worry on more days than not for at least six months and has three or more symptoms:

Restlessness or feeling keyed up or on edge

Being easily fatigued

Difficulty concentrating or mind going blank

Irritability

Muscle tension

Sleep disturbance (difficulty falling or staying asleep, or restless, unsatisfying sleep)

Having a sense of impending danger, panic, or doom

Having an increased heart rate

Breathing rapidly (hyperventilation)

Sweating, trembling, and/or nausea

Airports are full of the unknown. Unfamiliar people, places, restaurants, and there’s always possible danger. I have this extreme and unrealistic fear of going anywhere in public by myself. Yet I can walk into and airport and hop on a plane like it’s nothing.

Or so you think.

Two days leading up to my travel date, I begin to feel extremely nauseous and I sweat more uncontrollably than the usual. The more my mind focuses on the fact that I’m getting on a plane in two days, the worse it gets. The morning of, I feel so nauseous that I feel as if I might vomit at any given moment. Not to sound disgusting, but diarrhea is a very common physical symptom of anxiety and I sure as heck experience it the morning of a major trip. My mind races constantly about having to go somewhere surrounded my tons of people. I have never done well in large crowds to begin with.

All airports are different. TSA is nerve wracking for me because I never know if they’re going to make me take my shoes off or let me keep them on. For some reason, I overthink that to the max. Once I make it through TSA, I have a panic attack about my gate number. They typically don’t know what your gate number is going to be if it’s more than 3 or 4 hours before your flight. If it doesn’t appear on my ticket when I check in, I panic about whether or not it will show up on the screens with flight information. If it is on my ticket, I still panic about whether or not it’s even the right one.

If I can’t find the information on my gate number yet, I panic about not having a “safe” place to sit. I typically hide out in the bathroom for a little while. But if I notice someone sitting outside the bathroom that saw me go in, then I don’t sit in there for very long and then I panic about what to do next.

Once I get past the panic of the gate number and finally find the one that has my flight, I sit down, but can’t sit down directly next to someone. I prefer not to sit down facing anyone either, but most of the time, I can’t get lucky and have the best of both worlds. I don’t want people talking to me or see me reading or playing on my computer. If I put my headphones in, no one will typically talk to me.

I hope and I pray that it isn’t going to be a full flight so that I don’t have to sit directly next to someone. They always end up taking up the whole armrest. Then I have to consider that whoever it is might sleep almost the whole duration of the flight. If they do, I fear moving around because I don’t want to wake them up.

I’m starving, because I didn’t eat that morning. Why bother when your stomach feels like it’s going to explode at any second? I fear eating, first of all, because I always feel like someone is watching me. Second of all, I’m afraid that if I eat, I’ll throw it right up. I skip the eating and suffer.

I can’t really focus on the book I’m reading because the kid sitting on the other side of the gate keeps staring at me, or so I think. I can’t wait to get on that plane, because once I get past all of the people looking at me as I walk to my seat, I can finally relax because the only people that can clearly see me is the person sitting right next to me and the person sitting diagonally behind me that can see me through the crack in the seat. Two people are better than a whole flight’s worth of people.

Forget getting up to go the bathroom because then I have to deal with people staring at me again. It wouldn’t be a big deal if I could have gotten up from where I was sitting at the gate to go to the bathroom before we started boarding. But I couldn’t do that either because there’s still the factor of people staring at me. So the last time I used the bathroom was right after I got through TSA and before I found my gate. If I use the bathroom while I’m already walking from TSA or the gate I just came off of from my flight, my anxiety lessens for some reason.

Not getting up to go to the bathroom wouldn’t be that big of a deal if the flight was short. And they are, except for when I go to Europe; ten whole hours of sitting in the same seat, hardly able to stretch my legs, risking the fact that I could get a blood clot. Forget sleeping because I twitch once I fall asleep. I’ll either scare the person sitting next to me and risk them judging me, or scare myself awake. I don’t dare stare out the window for too long because then people will wonder what it is that I’m looking at, since everything all looks the same up in the sky.

It always feels like an eternity before the captain comes back on and says that we are beginning our decent into whatever city I’m landing into. I can breathe a sigh of relief before I remember that this is only one of two or three flights. The city I’m landing in is only there for a layover, not my final destination. The closer we get to the ground, the worse the anxiety gets once again, because I have to go back in and do it all over again; panic about the gate number, only use the bathroom as soon as I walk off the plane and not use it again until I land in the next city, panic about the people staring at me at my next gate.

It probably sounds like I care too much about what people think of me. And maybe I do. But the tricky part is that I don’t choose anxiety. I don’t choose to care what people think of me. I don’t choose to panic over “pointless” things.

Let me tell you something about anxiety.

Anxiety is completely and utterly illogical. Nothing about it makes sense.

But let me tell you something about the people who suffer from it like I do.

We already know this.

We already know that what we think and feel isn’t logical to you. But to us, it is. It makes perfect sense in our heads. Just because something doesn’t make sense to you, doesn’t mean it doesn’t make sense to someone else. I’m not saying anxiety is the right way of thinking or a good thing in any way. What I’m saying is that by telling someone that what or how they think isn’t right or doesn’t make sense, it invalidates them.

Anxiety isn’t just overthinking everything. It isn’t just “having a panic attack” - if you knew what those were like you probably wouldn’t throw it around so lightly - because you can’t hang out with your friends that night. Anxiety is a disorder that affects the brain both physically and psychologically. Anxiety affects your everyday life. For me, it affects any and all things that I do or say. It controls me. It controls my every move. It doesn’t let up. It doesn’t let up just because my head feels overwhelmed. It keeps pushing me and pushing me until I’ve reached my limit. And then once I’ve reached my limit, it pushes me right over that cliff and I plummet down to rock bottom. Sometimes, it’s over nothing - or so you think. Sometimes it’s over something major and logistical. Either way, it controls me and the fact that some people are controlled in just the same way but aren’t doing anything about it because people have to make rude comments about their disorder, is heartbreaking. People will literally never get help because of something someone else said about their anxiety; some snarky comment, some joke that they thought was funny, but was really invalidating to the person with the disorder.

Something else that invalidates people like me? Saying you have anxiety or a more specified anxiety disorder when you in fact have not actually been diagnosed. The mental health community is full of people who are all for self-diagnosis. I would be too if I was a mental health professional specifically trained to screen patients for specific disorders. I understand that not everyone can afford to go see someone who can screen them. But until you have been screened, you have not received a diagnosis. Telling people that you have anxiety when you have never been diagnosed throws the term, its definition, and its symptoms around like they’re nothing.

Most people think there isn’t help out there for their anxiety disorders. But let me just say that anxiety medications work wonders. Therapy works in a number of different ways for a number of different diagnoses, including anxiety. If you believe that you may have an anxiety disorder, please see a professional. I promise that there are ways to do it. Even if it’s just one time to receive a diagnosis. A diagnosis helps so much in the recovery process. If you know someone with an anxiety disorder, please do not invalidate them or their disorder. Please encourage them to seek help if they haven’t already.

If you or someone you know needs support right now, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or text START to 741-741

[frenchifries]

i hate airports you can’t even read the signs at the security check bc you’ll be detained if you say the word ‘weapon’ but the guy at the counter can ‘jokingly’ comment that he hopes we don’t have those exploding samsung phones in our luggage like hey tsa do something abt this man please

[pbandjesse]

I am back home! I took a bath and I'm all unpacked and comfy. I miss my mom but today was so wonderful. And its so good to see sweetP!!!

Today has been so wonderful though. I went to bed around midnight last night. And when I woke up around 8 I was so tired I was pretty miserable and sore. Rachel has texted us that she had lunch reservations for 1130 at a Disney. I didn’t exactly know where but I was looking forward to it anyway.

Mom ordered us room service and I just laid in bed for a while until it got there. I texted with Jess and just bullshitted around. The food was alright but I wasn’t super hungry. Now I am very hungry so I'm going to make an omelet after I post this. After we ate we got ready and were packed and ready around 945.

We checked out and Rachel was coming into the lobby just as we were finishing up. She said that she had spent all last night trying to get us reservations somewhere. She tried some disney parks and universal and was shocked she was able to get us a reservation. She ordered a lyft and we headed to Disney! I went to Disney world when I was in 4th grade and I've never been back. So I was pretty excited just to relive a little even if we weren’t going to the actual parks.

That’s when Rachel told us we were going to the animal kingdom lodge! Amazing! She couldn’t have picked a better park for me. We got dropped off at the main hotel and it was beautiful. We dropped off our bags and decided to look around a bit to just waste time before our reservation. We went outside to look around but only birds and cranes were in the enclosure. After a little bit of looking around and enjoying the sunshine Rachel asked where the animals were and it turns out we were at the wrong hotel. The animal were over at the lodge! Which is where I thought we were but we had to walk about 10 minutes to get to the place. but like I said it was beautiful and I enjoyed being outside with my mom and Rachel and it was just nice.

We got to the lodge and I got excited and went outside to see the animals. Started talking to the park employee. And then I realized that mom and Rachel weren’t behind me. and it turns out they didn’t know I went outside and got really scared and were calling for me and apparently because my mom described me as chest high they thought I was a child and were about to call a Code Adam. Oops. Sorry mom!

We watched the animals for a while and took so many pictures. I wore my mouse ears and I just had a blast. Our table wasn’t by the window so Rachel got it changed and we got to see the animals running and the zebras making faces and it was just so great. The food was Africa with indian flavors. So I wasn’t sure what to get. I wanted that Naan service tasting dish though so we got that and so once my curry things came I could barely eat them I had eaten so much bread. But the bread and the sauces were so good!!! It was also just really fun conversation. And my soda exploded but it was all fine. The food was great.

We got a little sample desert thing and Rachel told them it was recently my birthday so I got a little light up tinkerbell and a candle in my desert. Rachel shared her bread pudding with me as well. But I was really trying not to overstuff myself, but the food was really really good. I was sad the trip was over.

But we got to look at the animals a little longer and take pictures and it was lovely. We took the shuttle back to where our bags were and I ran inside to use the restroom and ran into someone we know?? My dad’s first girlfriend? Who also happens to be his ex wife’s best friend?? Her and her husband are traveling and just hoping around the parks at the free stuff. It was the weirdest coincidence. But out lyft was there and we headed right out.  

I had gotten confused and forgot to put that we were going to the airport but the driver was really nice. We got to the airport and me and mom hugged a bunch and headed our separate ways. I got through tsa without problem but I was starting to not feeling super hot. Just really tired. I took the tram to my gate and I was at the first one in my hallway so that made it easy. I went to go change into some warmer layers and move around the stuff in my bags and charge my phone. I was in the last zone so I was literally in the last 10 people to get in the plane but I had a great seat and really sweet old people next to me. They have been in the islands for a month! Very tan!

I mostly rested on the flight but I never slept. It was a nice flight though. When we landed I got lost in the airport because I didn’t know what terminal I was at and I got on the tram and talked to a girl and gave her the wrong info because she was lost too and when I got off the tram I realized I was wrong and ran back on and made her get off and sent her in the right direction. It was all good. but because I was so confused I just got on the light rail and headed up towards home. Got off where the savers is and took a lyft from there.

And now I'm home. its good to be back. sweetP wont leave me alone and he didn’t eat enough of his food I had left out for him. But he’s good. And I am too. So now I am going to eat some food and go to bed. I actually feel a little better too! Tomorrow I may go to ballet but I'm not sure. I will probably just take the day to rest. Sleep well everyone.