#i initially typed this up at like 3am

[astrologyvas]

some virgo notes in honor of virgo szn

୨ৎ [18+] ˚˖𓍢 🦢✧˚.

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virgo moon — this placement is so brat. sheer tank tops, cigarettes, making questionable decisions at 3am. the sign of virgo is notorious for being clean and neat, but this placement is so beautifully sloppy. (ex. charli xcx, lorde, madonna, zoe kravitz)

virgo rising — little fawns drinking from the stream. but also the type of people you make awkward eye contact with. virgo risings are so observant of their surroundings, and i've noticed that if they see someone paying attention to them too, they can get super flustered

asteroid eros in virgo (433) — their heart is won with a heartfelt compliment. also the type of people who watch 18+ videos just to take notes. they may come across shy & reserved, but when they open up, these native's want to look and perform perfectly. they want to be everything their partner finds attractive. definitely captivated by intellect and wit

lilith in virgo (bml) — these people are on a mission for knowledge, and they might find a lot of healing through it. the kind of person who is completely consumed by their craft. i've also noticed they have a lot of shame and guilt when it comes to being wrong, they want to be able to prove their point no matter what

virgo in the 2nd house — very coy when it comes to discussing finances. probably refuses to share how much they make or what their salary is

virgo mars — virgo is the fashion sign. with virgo mars, i've noticed they're usually the "executive" fashion placement. these people are gifted visionaries when it comes to high fashion and outfit composition (ex. princess diana). mercurial energy in general meshes well with the fashion world— but virgo mars specifically have a very refined and chic personal style

virgo venus — while virgo mars have an eye for fashion framework, virgo venus is the muse. these people are able to pull off clothing extremely well, a lot of things just fall on them in a visually pleasing way. so many fashion icons w this placement

chiron in virgo — being "the wound of perfection," these people tend to have a never-ending feeling that something is wrong with them, and i've noticed they can easily fall victim to the toxic self-improvement mindset. (ex. chiron in virgo in the 4th house— pressure from family to be flawless, family could have placed intense standards and restrictions on them)

. ݁₊ ⊹ ౨ৎ . ݁₊ ⊹ ⋆.˚ ⋆ ˚⋆౨ৎ˚ ⋆.˚ ⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚⊹ ⋆ ˚⋆౨ৎ˚ ⋆.˚

virgo descendant — these native's want someone to cook for them, someone who wakes them up so they don't have to set an alarm. perpetually yearning to frolic in the forest with their partner

virgo mercury — the FBI. their bullshit detector is crazy, and arguing with them is literally terrifying. the negative aspect of this placement i've noticed is that they can struggle with being taken too seriously, even if they're trying to be funny or lighthearted. i've also noticed that they get immense relief from journaling, it's a good way to release all the energy in their head

virgo sun — one of the more intimidating virgo placements from my experience. they can be similar to virgo risings, however i've noticed virgo suns are a little bit more intense and aloof upon initially meeting them

virgo rising — every virgo rising i know gets super carsick. either that or they have such sensitive stomachs in general, like getting nauseous from eating anything. also a recycled take, but i swear they really are prone to lactose intolerance

virgo degrees 6°, 18° — placements in virgo degrees can give the planet/celestial body an entwined energy of rigidity and reservation, and can higher your standards revolving the themes of the planet. (ex. sagittarius rising at 6° could manifest as someone who can be obsessive and nitpicky over their body, or is more shy than typical sagittarius ascendants. may even slightly resemble physical virgo traits)

asteroid lust in virgo (4386) — i've noticed that these people feel like they can't fit into their own standards, especially regarding sex. deep insecurity can stem from physical intimacy, may have a lot of anxiety around how their body looks while in the act

virgo midheaven — these people obtain the important roles of society and crush them. i've noticed that these native's can handle the pressure from vital and demanding roles like doctors, dentists, or manager positions because of their personal desire for perfection—specifically revolving their career

virgo sun — this placement has such an infamous reputation in music. they're the blueprint for so many genres and types of sound, the people you think of when you think of "music" (michael jackson, beyoncé, freddie mercury, amy winehouse)

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please do not copy or repeat my work anywhere

[juniperdugong]

Relationship Quirks 96s ver.

Aka habits I can see the boys doing in a relationship || 95s || 96s || 97s || Maknae line ||

Junhui

Avoids foods you don't like or are allergic to

You thought it was weird when after you had mentioned that you were allergic or didn't like a certain food that you would never encounter it when you were with Jun. Of course, you would always avoid it but you knew Jun to not be that picky, in fact, he's quite an adventurous eater. So it just struck you as odd.

That is until you overhear him on the phone with the restaurant you guys were having a date at later tonight asking about the ingredients used in certain dishes and if {insert food here} was used. When you talk to him about this he casually says that he just wants to make sure that you eat well and like what you eat. (THE SWEETEST BOY IN THE WORLD)

Little do you know that he's started to exclude those foods from his diet as well, especially if it's an allergy you have. If it's a food you don't like then he doesn't want you to avoid kissing him if he's eaten it. BUT IF IT'S AN ALLERGY, red alert red alert, he thinks you'll go into anaphylactic shock if he eats something you're allergic to and then he touches/kisses you.

If you're not by his side when he's making decisions then it feels like the balance of the universe is off. Could be halfway across the world from each other and dude is calling you at 3am to ask which magnet he should bring home as a souvenir.

Hoshi

Needs your input on almost every decision he makes

Ooh it's bad, like looking at your parents when the doctor asks what your age is type of bad. He will know exactly what he wants at a restaurant but as soon as the waiter comes he's looking at you like a sheep and you have to mouth what he said he wanted seconds ago as he repeats you blindly. Almost all his decisions must have you're input or else he doesn't know what to do. This might be annoying to some but he values what you have to say so much. And honestly, if you disagree with something he takes it into genuine consideration and thinks about it a lot before making the final call.

His mindset can be summed up like this, "If y/n doesn't think I'll like that pasta then I probably won't like it, they know me very well."

Dude is clingy but not in a physical way... just in the way that he follows you around like a cat that wants your attention but can't say it. He does it unconsciously and to be honest it takes a mutual friend or one of the boys to point it out for either of y'all to notice. Truly it feels like he has to stay within a 30ft. radius of you sometimes.

Wonwoo

Follows you everywhere

The reason this behavior even started was because he missed you so much after tours and arduous schedules that he just HAD to be near you but he never wanted to initiate physical contact. (Being near you is enough for him) It's gotten to the point though that he ASSUMES you're taking him everywhere with you. You're upset and need "space"? Good luck! You'll be in another room for max 5mins before he's in there sitting the farthest possible distance he can while keeping you in sight.

"I can't do this right now, Wonwoo." "Fine then." "I'm going to my mom's place for a while." *Magically has both your suitcases and bags packed* "When are we leaving?"

I know I know... it's unexpected but true! The thing that I don't think a ton of carats realize is that this man does not fear affection AT ALL. He just doesn't like it in public displays. So in the privacy of his studio or at either of your homes, he is clingy, 100%.

Woozi

Needs to feel your touch

Has a computer chair that is specifically for you to be next to him while he's in the studio. If you're in the same room as him or HELL even the same building and there are no cameras or minimal people and you're not next to him then what even is the point? Might as well tell him you hate him or something, at least that's how he treats it.

The crazy part is that he doesn't even ask you for affection! He'll just say things out loud and expect you to get the message or he'll say things directly towards you but won't look in your direction. His number one phrase is, "I miss you..." all while you're feet away from him on the couch in the studio. You can be sitting in your designated chair BUT YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR LEGS DRAPED OVER HIS???? Suddenly, you hear a constant loop of "Damn, I miss my partner sooooo much, right now.", like sir? They're right there?

A/N: I am clinically insane over the 96 line. ALSO EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WONWOO!!!! (Even though it's literally 10pm and his day is nearly over) I'll try to have the next 2 parts out sometime tmrw. Stay sweet lovelies!! Reblogs and comments are like power surges for my writing so they are much appreciated!

TAGLIST (open): @bemybabiibish

[xxsabitoxx]

NSFW Kyojuro Rengoku HeadCanons

Kyojuro x Fem! Reader

Warnings: as the title suggests, this is full of smut

A/N: the last time I did a NSFW HC post focused on one character it was for Sanemi shortly after I made this blog… that’s kinda fucked. Why haven’t I revisited this idea? Idk but thank you for suggesting it @sharkwhore 😩🫶

Also it’s past 3am, my alarm is set to go off at 7am, of course this ain’t proof read lmfao so ignore any errors

Kyojuro is such a gentleman that you’re almost shocked the first time he tries to initiate something more intimate with you.

You’re actually pretty surprised that he seems to know exactly what he’s doing… even though he claimed you were his first partner

He’d later tell you that he went to Tengen for advice. Having three wives naturally meant the man had more than enough time to learn a thing or two

Kyojuro starts off slow with you, wandering hands and lingering kisses. He works you up subtly, until he can tell that you are aching for him to take things further

“Sit on my lap.” Kyojuro smiled at you, tapping his muscular thigh innocently. He’d been toying with you all night, his hand lingering on your waist longer than it needed to. The soft kisses on the back of your neck while you had cooked dinner. His compliments, the way his eyes seemingly devoured you. You were dying for him to move things further. “Someone’s feeling extra romantic tonight… I’m not forgetting a special occasion am I?” You sat down, trying to suppress a shiver as his arms came to wrap around you. He was warm, as always, thigh tensing and relaxing below you as he got used to your weight on him. “No, no special occasion… I just missed you.”

Kyojuro loves foreplay for a multitude of reasons

For one, he loves when you tell him what you want him to do. He loves when you guide him, tell him exactly what you like and dislike. He loves watching your eyes grow hazy when he does something just right

He’s all about you, I mean really he won’t even think of fucking you until you’ve cum at least 2-3 times on his mouth or fingers.

Speaking of mouth… Kyojuro loves when you sit on his face. Well he loves when you sit anywhere on him but sitting on his face is his personal favorite

He encourages you when you’re shy about it, he’ll even use his own hands to push you down a little further, assuring you that you won’t suffocate him

“C’mon… a little lower.” His hands are gripping your thighs as they cage his head. Your face is warm, hands holding your breasts as you tried to lower yourself without fully sitting on him. “You’re holding back…” he commented softly, your cunt just inches from his face. “…’m not…” a lame attempt, especially since you knew he could feel your thighs trembling with the effort. “I’m asking you to sit on my face. I mean that, you know. I want you to fully sit on my face.” It was blunt, maybe that’s why you couldn’t stop the squeal of shock that left your lips. “I’ll suffocate you if I put my full weight on you, Kyo.” He only gripped your thighs harder, dragging you down closer. “You won’t suffocate me… now please… sit.”

Kyojuro is the type to prefer overstimulating you than edging you. He doesn’t see a point in restricting your pleasure when he can just give you more of it.

This man is a sucker for cowgirl. He loves watching you ride him… in any position really. He loves when you climb onto his lap while sitting on the couch, he loves when you climb on top of him in bed.

In an odd way, he almost uses it as patience training. He likes to see how long he can put up with you struggling to fuck yourself on him before he gives in and takes over.

He’s more of a sexual person that you gave him credit for. Honestly with his personality you’d never guess he had such a high sex drive. Every night you spend together, so long as you are in the mood too, you’ll do something.

“You’re cute.” Kyojuro watched you, smile present and hands on your waist as you struggled to lift yourself up and down. Hell you figured the couch would make things easier for yourself. “Shut up.” Was all you could manage, head falling forward out of embarrassment as he laughed. “Cute and feisty.” He corrected himself, deciding to make things easier by thrusting his hips shallowly to meet you. You couldn’t stop the noises that slipped out of you. This angle, albeit rather annoying and a lot of work, allowed Kyojuro to slip further into you than any other position did. Plus, you knew he loved it. So of course, you always made the effort to get into this position at least once. Even if you did break a sweat because of it.

Quick X-Ray vision :D

Length is about five and a half inches, girth is average. He has veins running along his shaft that are prominent when he’s horny. Slight curve and nearly trimmed hair. Why does this feel so awkward lmao

When it comes to riskiness, Kyojuro is the type to keep it within your property but never out in public. Public ≠ outside. He’d absolutely fuck you on the training grounds in his back yard.

He’s rough when he’s frustrated or overwhelmed from work. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t make you feel loved during and after. He takes aftercare super seriously especially after he’s been rough with you

Kyojuro is unintentionally really good at dirty talk. In the heat of the moment he’s whispering in your ear until you’re squealing and yelling his name.

“You like that, don’t you? I can feel you squirming.” You swallowed, nails digging into his shoulders as he hovered over you. Sweat was dripping down his temple, bright eyes narrowed as he fucked into you. “C’mon don’t be shy. Look me in the eye when you cum.” Your name left his lips in a tone as smooth as silk, back arching as he dragged across that one particular spot. “Oh? There it is.” He chuckled, the noise vibrating his chest as he drew his hips back and thrusted forward again the same way he had a moment prior. Again, you cried out as white hot pleasure racked your body. “Atta girl, keep going, I wanna hear how good I’m doing.”

Kink wise Kyojuro is fairly tame. Depends on what you think is tame though.

Heavy praise kink, overstimulation, creampies, marking, restraining (with his hands not rope or ties etc), semi-public, I mean he just likes fucking you outside.

Kyojuro likes to keep your sex life private but also gets excited by the idea of getting caught… though he knows he’ll be mortified after the fact

He adores when you leave your mark on him. Nail scratches up his back, your bite mark on his shoulder, bruises on his neck, all of it.

He likes doing the same to you, but it gives him a sense of pride when you’re the one doing it to him.

Making sure everyone knows who he belongs to

“Are you sure it’s okay?” You blinked at him, face feeling warm as you looked over the scratches you left along his back. “Of course it is.” You didn’t catch the smirk on his face, he truly adored the feeling and the look. “Kyo, it’s warm today and you’re training with the other men…” the other male Hashira would likely see it, you knew that’s what he wanted. “Hmm? You’re worried about me taking off my shirt?” He teased softly, tightening the tie in his hair before turning to face you. “I mean, yeah.” You couldn’t get over the angry red marks you’d managed to mark him with. “There is nothing to be worried about. If anything, they’ll be jealous.” You sighed in defeat, “I’ll never understand the mind of a man.” You couldn’t help but laugh as his arms found your waist.

[khloxxy]

hello! i hope you're doing well ^_^ i just wanna ask about your favorite headcanon of rus, cana and ame (if you're up for it, no pressure, i wanna see what kumajirou looks like in your style)

i like your art! don't mind me if you see me liking your posts hehe

Hello (^_^) thank you... Your art is very beautiful I'm honoured... Sorry if this is kinda late(?) my brain works best when it's the middle of the night. I wrote this in my notes at like 3am...

My headcanons are really messy and subject to change so keep that in mind 🙏 Gonna put them under a read more cause they're pretty long and I rambled on and on.. Got carried away sorry!! Also it's kind of cringe at some points but that's okay. To be cringe is to be free.

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Rus: My beloved... He's cute, yes, but also very creepy. (I love a creepy rus) I see him as this character that's always looming over everyone, always watching... He likes how docile and obedient Cana is, and with Ame... well... He likes the challenge.

He likes the arts... And I believe he's an incredible poet and dancer. I like to think that Rus spends his free time writing hauntingly beautiful poetry in a journal of his since there are a lot of beautifully written Russian literature... That journal could also probably work as his diary too because why not. He also does ballet and figure skating, and Ame probably calls him gay for it, this irks Rus but that's okay. He'll rip the tongue out of that American's loud mouth one day. He just has to be patient. (that last part is cringe but my rusame brain told me to write it)

For music I think he'd like classical (tchaikovsky) and metal. I also think he'd visit old abandoned buildings just to see the ruins. Maybe even appreciate the architecture? He finds beauty in the decay.

His relationship with Ame is a game of chess (Rus loves chess, so he loves whatever he has going on with Ame), each move calculated, each interaction charged with unspoken tension (they never reveal their love for eachother... the only time that would happen is probably in life-or-death situations but with their immortality that's practically impossible – actually you know what?? Scratch that. No confessions... Unless drunk or under the influence of something maybe.) With Cana, it's more like a delicate dance, appreciating his gentleness but always aware of the fragile nature of their bond – he's aware that cana and him are only really bound together through Ame.

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Cana: Neglected boy (eng and fra both coddled Ame more) ... Envious of Ame but still loves him – he's frustrated. He knows so much about Ame but Ame knows nothing about him. Ame doesn't care enough to bother learning about him. It's unfair. I believe he actually has Kumajirou for comfort... But even his pet bear doesn't remember him (to be fair, he doesn't remember Kumajirou's name either.)

For music taste, I think he'd like shoegaze actually... it's calm yet messy-ish and it matches well with his vibe. (Totally not just projecting my music taste onto him)

He dislikes being in the shadow of his brother but he does appreciate his brother sticking up for him. Doing all the talking for him. He doesn't like new people usually. They never understand. (Never understand his freak.. yes Cana has a hidden freak to me.)

He genuinely gets along with rus. They're more similar than they initially thought after all. I mean they're both shy (to a point), both live in cold climates, both have weird relationships with ame... And both are connected through Ame... Rus and Cana both recognize that they are intrinsically tied together only through Ame.

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Ame: Insufferable (put him in the eternal torture chamber!) Even so, Rus and Cana are still drawn to him like moths to a flame. Type of guy to test the limits of his immortal body... I wish Hima did more with their immortality because that is such an interesting subject. Probably has more DUIs than you can count. Has crashed a plane on purpose. No way you can be the United States of America and not end up crazy.

For the Cold War... Ame was genuinely disappointed when the USSR fell, he was like "well... what now...??" Because for several decades he had a villain to match his hero... But now that Rus fell off... what now? He misses the thrill and rush of it (he's a thrill-seeker... Type 3 fun typa guy). Also, he knew nothing would actually happen anyhow because of M.A.D (Mutually Assured Destruction) no one would actually drop bombs.. right? (they had a few close calls). Maybe the cold war was just one big edging session... (Lmfao sorry had to say it)

Okay adding to the above thing but the paragraph got too long for me. Another reason why Ame thrived in the cold war is that Rus had his singular attention on him. Just him. He loved that. He loved having all of someone's attention. He can't help it. He's just a girl! 🎀 (Kinda yandere-ish vibes but I fw yandere ideas so... Actually all 3 of them could be yandere in the right mindset.)

To me, Ame is the kind of person who thrives on adrenaline, always seeking the next big rush – he's also a huge sucker for attention. That's why he does the crazy things he does. For attention. After all, what is he without attention?

With Cana, well this is a me thing but I like to think that Ame is actually quite clingy with his brother.. He's one of the only people Ame allows to touch him.. Ame's not a very touchy person. Ame does crave genuine connections and Cana is one of the few that can offer that. They're each other's one and only brother after all. That has to mean something.

His relationship with Cana? Complicated... They seem good from the outside but Ame barely knows anything about his brother. Cana could say a million things about Ame but Ame could only respond with maybe a few hundred or so things about Cana – heck, maybe even that would be stretching it. Although, Ame does care for his brother in his own way, truly.

Last little thing I'd like to add: Ame has a collection of vintage stuff. I don't know why. Vintage things just scream American to me. Like old comic books..

[kaiserthread]

how many lovers do i go through to find you?

itoshi sae boyfriend hcs! content: pro soccer player sae, gn! reader wrote this at 3am when i felt like shit, sae always makes things better

i’d imagine that sae is type to never jump into anything without giving it his all

he wants to be the best bf you’ve ever had

takes a while for him to open up even if he’s the one initiating things

he takes things really slow, think three dates before he holds your hand, 5 before he’ll kiss your cheek, 2 months before he’s asking if you’ll let him have the honor of being your boyfriend

then and only then will he give you a chaste kiss on the lips

little things, always giving you his jacket unprompted. doesn’t matter if it’s his blazer, wool coat, even a hoodie, he will make sure you're warm even at his own expense

always making sure he’s touching you in some way when he’s out with you, hand on your lower back to guide you through a crowd, arm around your shoulder pulling you close, hands intertwined as you’re walking

sends flowers to your job and orders you lunch when he knows you’re busy and need a boost

lovessss showing you off 

buys you the prettiest jewelry, shoes, coats, and of course a jersey with his name plastered across the back 

firm believer that you’re his good luck charm and always makes sure to spot you in the crowd and send you a little smile

spending time together is always the highlight of his day, you moved in with him after a year and a half of dating and he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to go back to living alone

he loves napping with you, loves waking up with you in his arms every morning, loves sharing pizza and watching movies with you on the weekends

his apartment used to be so dull but now your shoes are next to his cleats and his hoodies are always missing because you decided to wear them and he’s so grateful you decided to stay with him 

not everything was amazing at first 

he’s def got communication issues and getting things out of him even a year into your relationship can sometimes be a hassle

used to bottle things up and pretend they weren’t bothering him and the second that  the issue came up he’d shut down any of your attempts to ask what was wrong 

which is frustrating because you’re his partner, he should be able to trust you

sae doesn’t have a lot of relationship experience and worries that pushing his problems onto you might drive you away

definitely a few fights over the subject early on but after a lot of apologies and long conversations he realized it was time to make some changes

needs a lot of reassurance but he’s trying his best for you

may not be the best at communicating his own struggles but is exceptional at comforting you

need to rant? you’ve got his full attention for however long you need

bad day at work? he’s picking you up and already has your favorite dinner ordered and on the way

you’re crying? pulls you into his arms and lets you drench the shoulder of his favorite shirt with your tears

physical pain? he’s an athlete, he knows every pain remedy under the sun and will be going through each one until one works

stressed out? spa day! books a couples massage and facial to take some weight off your shoulders, even if it’s only for a few hours 

overall just wants to make sure you’re taken care of, sweetest bf everrrrr mwah!

[strniohoeee]

Cutting Dead

Pairing: Chris Sturniolo X Female Reader, cute imagine could be suggestive at parts😚

Synopsis: Y/N was getting ready for a date when some unexpected things decided to happen👤

Warnings⚠️: None really if I’m being honest, could be suggestive at parts, but nothing crazy☺️

Song for the imagine: Heartbreaker- Justin Bieber

I had stood over the triplets house last night because I had been asked out on a date by a guy I really liked. I haven’t been in the dating scene for the last year because I was constantly being disappointed by every single guy. But when I put myself out there again I ran into Chance. He was so sweet and funny and not a creep, Nick saw how head over heels I was for this guy, and wanted me to spend the night so I could get ready, and express my excitement with him.

“Y/N I’m so fucking happy for you! You deserve a good guy” Nick said jumping on the bed next to me

“Nick I’m so fucking happy like hes so nice to me, and he was the one who asked me on the date, and planned it all” I said smiling and blushing like a schoolgirl

“A guy who actually took initiative?? This we love!! Oh my god we have to make you look even more hot than you do tomorrow”Nick said clapping his hands together

“I brought so many outfit options! Like this guy is really making me think about my appearance” I told Nick

“Finally! You were starting to give Adam Sandler core I was getting scared” He said laughing at me

“Oh you fucking dick! Shut up” I said throwing my pillow at him

That night we stood up pretty late just laughing and talking about how excited I was. We went to bed at 3am, and we woke up at 9 because my date was at 12, and Chance was coming to pick me up.

I decided to start getting ready at 10, I showered and washed my hair. After stepping out I did my skincare, put lotion on, and put pajamas on so I could do my hair.

I decided on a blowout, and once that was done I started my makeup. I loved a full beat of makeup. It made me feel even more powerful with my thick lashes, and my brown lip liner.

As I was doing my makeup and hair Nick was chatting with me asking me all types of questions

“Do you think he’s a catfish?” He asked laughing

“Nick we’ve FaceTimed before…OBVIOUSLY NOT” I told him laughing

“Mmm true! Do you think he’s actually 6 foot” he also asked

“Uhhh…I actually never gave that a thought” I said as I applied my blush and highlighter

“Ouuu are you gonna kiss him” he asked wiggling his brows

“Weirdo….maybe if the vibes right” I said as I set my makeup with some spray

“Omgggg yall gonna fuck on the first date?” He asked me, and both Chris and Matt had walked into the room the same time as he was asking this question

“Who we fuckin” Matt said laughing as he went to sit on Nicks bed

“Nobody. And no Nick I’m def not fucking on a first date” I said as i was putting glue on my lashes

“Why not? It’s fun” Nick said as he pushed Chris out the way of laying in his spot

“Ummm because I’m looking for someone who doesn’t just want to fuck. I want real love” I told him as I started to stick my lashes on

“That Jada and Will love” Chris said laughing

“Given the fact that they hate each other I’m not too sure, but uhh something along those lines” I said laughing

“Ouuu that Morticia and Gomez love” Matt said nodding his head

“Oh yes!” I said looking at him through the mirror

I had finished applying my lip liner and gloss, and was ready to put on my outfit

“Okay guys I need opinions on the outfit let me go change” I said as i ran into nicks bathroom and put my outfit on

I was wearing medium/dark wash mid rise jeans that were flared at the bottom, and hugged me in all the right places. Actually hugged me a little too tight as I gained some weight and now they were extra tight on my ass and thighs. Then I put on my fitted hot pink shirt that said I Love Men, but the N was scratched out so basically I love me. And then for shoes I decided on these cute felt hot pink wedge sandals. The whole vibes was giving Bratz doll, and to top it off I put clear Y2K glasses on my head. I felt hot and powerful.

I stepped out of the bathroom.

“Sooo what do we think” I said as I gave them a spin

“You look sooo hot” Nick said snapping his fingers

“You look great” Matt said giving me a thumbs up

“Spin one more time” Chris said rubbing his chin like he was wondering

So I did another spin for them

“Your ass looks fat asf, he’ll def be drooling” Chris said nonchalantly

“Chris don’t be weird” Matt said smacking his younger brother

“I appreciate it…even though that is weird. I’ll take it” I said giving him a weird stare

“WHAT I’m stating the obvious” Chris said putting his hand up in defense

“Okay even though Chris is a creep your ass is fat” Nick said

“Okay enough about my ass” I said laughing and going to grab my phone. The time read 11:58am

“Omggg guys it’s almost timeeee” I said in a sing song way

“Has he texted you?” Nick asked

“Mm not since 11:30” I said grabbing my purse and putting my lipliner and lipgloss in it

“I figured he’s driving” I said as I sprayed myself with perfume, and getting ready to walk down to the living room to wait for Chance

We had all gone downstairs, and Chris decided to go shower while Matt and Nick sat on the couch with me as we chatted. I hadn’t realized how long we were chatting for until I looked down at my phone, and saw the time said 12:15pm…..hm weird

I decided to shoot Chance a text

-heyyy! Hope traffic isn’t too bad. What’s your ETA?☺️

5 minutes had gone by with no response

“Did he answer?” Matt asked

“No, but he was working the 5AM shift, and sometimes they don’t get off till 12:30-1, so maybe he’ll text me” I told them, and to this they nodded their head

By now it was 12:55pm and I still haven't gotten a response. I was slightly worried that he was standing me up, or he might’ve gotten into an accident, so I decided to call him. No answer

“I’m not sure why he isn’t picking up. At 11:30 he literally said he couldn’t wait to see me soon” I told Nick and Matt

“Call him again” Nick said

So I called two more times, and no response. In fact , it went straight to voicemail. I was really starting to think he stood me up, when all of a sudden my phone pinged with a text message

Chance🦕

I’m sorry, but I can’t do this any more. I didn’t mean to lead you on. You’re a cool girl, and I really like you, but I was really hoping our relationship was just friends with benefits. I’m not looking to commit to anyone right now :)

My jaw fucking dropped, and at this point Chris came into the living room

“What’s going on?” He asked as he sat down on the couch

“Uhhh he stood me up” I said still blinking down at my phone in utter shock

“He did what?” Nick asked

“Yeah… he said I’m sorry, but I can’t do this any more. I didn’t mean to lead you on. You’re a cool girl, and I really like you, but I was really hoping our relationship was just friends with benefits. I’m not looking to commit to anyone right now” I told them as I was reading the message out loud

“Are you joking right now” Nick said grabbing my phone to read the message himself

“After a year of not seeing anyone. I finally find a guy who I thought was so sweet and kind, and it turns out he’s just like the rest” I said taking a deep breath and rolling my eyes

“Oh what a fucking dick” Nick said handing my phone back to me, and I grabbed it closing out the message. Not even bothering to respond to him

“I got all dolled up for a fucking loser” I said taking my shoes off

“Hey! You don’t need him. There’s plenty of other guys out there who would kill to be with you” Matt said, giving me a reassuring smile.

“Yeah I know, but I was really starting to like the kid” I said rolling my eyes

“Y/N fuck himmm you’re so hot! You could literally have anyone you want. Literally go out right now, and watch all the guys drop to their knees begging for you” Nick said, and I smiled at this

“Ehh it’s fine I’m going to wash my face and change my clothes. So I can eat my feelings and bask in my self pity” I said standing up

“No. Let me take you out” Chris said as he stood up

“Take me out?” I said looking at him as I put my shoes back down

“Yeah, let's go out on the town, maybe the mall, and whatnot. You look too nice not to go out come on” he said grabbing the keys

“Oh okay” I said as I put my shoes back on and grabbed my purse

“Have funnnnn” Nick said as he gave a small smirk to Matt

I had driven us to the mall to go walk around and shop. As we were walking around I was getting nothing but stares from every guy I passed.

“See! Too pretty to not go out. Every guy is staring at you” Chris said as we walked into another store

“Thanks Chris. You’re making me feel better about getting stood up” I said laughing a little bit

“Ehh fuck that loser we can have more fun together” he said giving my arm a nudge

After we left the mall, we decided on grabbing some dinner, and then he took me to the pier to walk the boardwalk and look at the night sky and the waves crashing on the shore.

While on the boardwalk Chris and I stopped for ice cream, and decided to sit down to eat them

“I really appreciate you doing this for me. I haven’t thought of chance since we left the house” I said looking over at him

“I’m glad. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to put a smile on your face” he said looking up at me

I just smiled, and he turned to continue eating his ice cream. I was looking at him in admiration. And only then did it hit me that I might’ve liked Chris. I mean he was always there for me, my biggest hype man, and we were inseparable when we were together. I was so scared of coming to realization with this, because I felt that he wouldn’t like me, and I struggled with rejection. So I pushed all those feelings to the back of my mind, but they never truly went away. Every guy I ever spoke and went on dates with had all reminded me of Chris, but they weren’t him. I either broke things off with them, or they ghosted me, and I was hurt, but I think I was more hurt at the fact I couldn’t come to terms with my adoration for Chris. It hurt that every guy I dated just wasn’t him.

I broke away from staring at him, and began to speak

“We should take some photos” I said, and as he was finishing his ice cream he agreed

Chris was my biggest hype man. Every photo he took always came with a comment “oh yes!” “Oh my god you ass looks so good like that, hold it!” “Eating these bitches uppp” he said and that made me laugh, as I laughed he snapped another photo.

“Ew Chris I hate my smile, why would you take that” I said walking over to him to look at the photo

“No Y/N, you look beautiful just standing there laughing, and in raw emotions. This is my favorite photo of you” he said as he looked at the photo with a smile on his face

“Whatever you say” I said blushing and trying to not sound excited

“Okay your turn” I said to him as I grabbed my phone from him and pushed him away

Chris was posing like a model. “Okayyyy fucking it up” I said as I took more photos. “It’s giving bad bitchhh” I said and he gave me the middle finger the same time I snapped the photo

“Oh Chris this might be the hottest photo of you” I told him as I showed him

“Ouuu you think I’m hot?” He said smirking at me

“Yeah…who doesn’t” I said rolling my eyes

He just stared at me and laughed. After a few more photos we decided to head back to the car, and chat some more.

“You know something” Chris said looking at me, and I looked back giving him a puzzled face

“I really fucking like you” he said looking into my eyes. This made me really nervous, and I just looked down and started to blush

“I have liked you for so long, and the fact that I didn’t come clean sooner is killing me” he said

“Chris…I like you too, and I’m upset I didn’t come to you sooner either. I looked for you in every guy I dated, and it hurt that they just weren’t you” I told him

“Nobodies like me” he said looking down at my lips

“Yeah I’ve realized that now” I said laughing a little bit

“Kiss me” he said, licking his lip, and so I did. I leaned in and smashed our lips together. We had a small makeout session before we both pulled away

“Omg Chris I got lipgloss all over you” I said laughing and covering my mouth

“That’s hot” he said looking into the mirror

I just smacked his chest and blushed

“How about we take a picture for that loser and send it to him” Chris said smirking at me, and to this I agreed

He took my phone and leaned into me as I leaned into him for yet another kiss, and he snapped the photo.

“Oh he’s gonna be maddd” Chris said laughing

I leaned over to see what he was doing, and he snaked his hand around me grabbing my ass and giving it a firm grab

“I meant it when I said your ass is so fat in these” he said biting his lip

“Chrissss stop” I said whining

“Keep wearing jeans like this, and I swear I’ll cum in my pants” he said licking his lips, and I looked at him before giving him another kiss and moving down to his neck

He moaned lightly, and then stopped me

“We have plenty of time for that, but for now let’s send these pics to him” He said giving me a quick peck on the lips

Chris opened up the message app and clicked on Chance name before sending him the photo

-fuck you :)

Chris typed, and then sent another photo. It was the photo of him with his middle finger up

“Omgg Chris he’s going to be sooo mad” I said laughing

“Yeah fuck him, but for now I get to kiss up on and love my beautiful girl” he said as he kissed me once more

After that we drove back to the house, and as we were walking into the house he kept grabbing and smacking my ass. Even as I walked up the stairs in front of him

“Chris stop” I said in a whisper as we both laughed

“I see you two had fun” Nick said as him and Matt were still on the couch

“Yeah we did” I said to them as I put my purse down and slipped my shoes off

“Oh Chris for sure had fun” Matt said laughing at him, and it was only then I realized my lip gloss and lip liner was still all over his face

“Fuck yeah I did, I was all up in there” he said

“CHRIS STOP IT” I said smacking him

“Don’t tell me…” Nick said with wide eyes

“No we didn’t fuck” I said laughing

“Omg okay I was going to say please don’t say anything I dont want to throw up” he responded

We all just laughed, and as I went to walk to the kitchen Chris smacked my ass again

“CHRIS PLEASE” I said as I turned around blushing

“Yall please don’t be gettin it on infront of us” Nick said covering his eyes

“Never” Chris said as he grabbed a handful of my ass, and started to lead me down to his room

“We’ll see yall tomorrow” Chris said as we walked downstairs

“PLEASE NO FUCKING” Nick and Matt yelled in disgust

“SHUT UPP” we both yelled back and laughed

Chris and I spent the rest of the night laughing and watching videos together. Occasionally making out, but other than that we called it a night at 11, and fell asleep snuggled into one another.

Tehee hope you guys liked this one😚😚

-J💅🏽

[sadstonewrites]

Piotr Rasputin/Colossus SFW Alphabet

hi, I'm still alive I promise! Still working on fics, but wanted to throw this out here as a fun little writing exercise with the SFW alphabet! So, without further ado...

taglist: @master-sass-blast @osmiumamygdala @black-but-mildly-sunny @seconds-2-midnight

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Piotr is a very physically affectionate man - pats on the back, a hand up if you’re struggling to climb over an obstacle, a hand on your shoulder and a squeeze as he passes. He would struggle at first if you didn’t like physical affection or were uncomfortable with being touched, but his next go-to would be acts of service. Dishes needed to be washed? Done. Laundry needs to be folded? He’s already on it and put on your favorite show so you can watch as you two pair the socks together; he likes making your life easier if he can. 

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

He’s the type of best friend who you know that if you go to for help, he’s going to help in whatever capacity he can. That being said, he’s the type to offer you solutions and advice as he’s doing it; if you need to vent, you’re going to have to tell him otherwise he’s going to try and fix it as best he can. The type of best friend to give you a lecture for ending up in a bad situation, but still comes to your rescue even if you're an hour away and it’s 3AM on a weeknight. 

The friendship starts naturally, you’re a colleague of his at Xavier’s or a friend of a friend and Piotr just…fits in your life. He slots in and makes a home for himself in your life, and you in his. 

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He’s a big fan of cuddles, although always very hesitant to initiate since he is one - very large and heavy - and two - covered in a hard metallic armor almost 85% of the time. You’re going to have to initiate and assure him you’re comfortable, and only then will he willingly cuddle up.

That being said, he’s a big fan of laying on his back with you nestled up to his side and your head on his chest. He’s got an arm draped over your side, lazily tracing patterns on your skin and holding you close. 

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

On paper he’d love to settle down, but knows the reality comes with conditions that he could never willingly ask a partner to be okay with. He’s still a superhero, and so many people would still need his help; if he had to choose between a mission where lives are at stake and you asking him to stay, he hates to admit how difficult a decision it would be. He doesn’t know if he could ever ‘retire’ in the traditional sense, settle down and leave the hero work on the shelf, but if anyone could persuade him, it’d be you.

He’s an alright cleaner in the fact he doesn’t make much of a mess to begin with. Piotr always picks up after himself, and is a very big fan of Marie Kondo’s mantra of keeping a clean and tidy space. As far as cooking goes, he’s good at cooking very specific dishes - Russian comfort food, anyone? But beyond that his cooking is a bit bland; the type to eat chicken breasts and steamed vegetables for every meal because it’s quick, easy, and keeps him fueled. You’re going to need to teach him to use seasonings. 

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

If there is one man in the world who gives people too many chances, it’s Piotr. He always wants to give people the benefit of the doubt, the chance to change or improve. That being said, the point where the relationship would end would be if a major boundary was crossed; at that point, it’s time to reevaluate and have a serious conversation about the trajectory of the relationship. It would be awkward, and uncomfortable, because he would never want to intentionally hurt his partner, but also he would be quick to the point. Not wanting to drag it on any longer than it’s already gone. 

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Piotr likes the idea of commitment, of having a partner to share things with. Not so much having a ‘better half’ but just having someone there for him, and someone he can be there for in turn. It would probably take him 3-4 years of serious dating before he would want to get married, although he’s the type to dream about it around 6 months into the relationship. 

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

As Colossus, he had to teach himself to be gentle - to not accidentally crush someone’s hand in a handshake or put his foot through the floor with each step - it’s carried over even when he’s not armored up. He’s extremely gentle, very aware of the strength of his hands or how his large frame fills a room and could very easily knock over an end table (or, god forbid, a person) with the slightest brush of his hip. 

He would need to teach himself to be gentle with his emotions as well, his frustration or anxiety coming off as overbearing or lecturing at first (again, you’ll need to specifically tell him not to offer solutions when you just need to vent). That being said, he’s not the type that’s prone to emotional outbursts, but rather has the need to channel his negative emotions into action rather than sitting with them and fully processing them. 

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Loves hugs, is perfect for hugs, hugs his friends often (if they are okay with it). He’s a big bear hugger, the type to pick the other person up by the armpits and swing them around if the occasion calls for it.  

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

As soon as he knows the other person feels the same, he’s going to say it. Not the type to be subtle in his affections for his friends or romantic partners, so at most maybe 6 months into the relationship. 

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Piotr doesn’t get jealous; if you’re in a relationship together, then he trusts you and knows not to be jealous if you’re spending time with anyone else or aren’t giving him your full undivided attention. He knows you have a life outside of him and your relationship, and he actively encourages it. 

Of course, that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to be protective. He’s not jealous because somebody is taking up all your attention, but he is absolutely moving and putting an arm around you if you show any outward sign of being uncomfortable; he’s going to physically move you behind him, if needed. He’s going to check up on you when you’re with your friends, a quick text to make sure you’re having fun and then another to ask when you’ll be home; he’ll wait up for you to come home and breathe a little easier when you walk through the door. 

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

If he’s armored up, his skin is cool to the touch and his lips are no different as they gently brush against yours. Butterfly soft, the smallest amount of pressure as if he’s afraid you’ll break under him. He’s a big fan of forehead kisses (it’s the easiest kiss to give when you’re almost seven feet tall) but also kisses to both your cheeks and then a soft, final press of his lips against yours. 

Kiss his knuckles, his palms, and he’s a goner. He’s so used to his hands being used to smash through walls and push through obstacles, that the gentle press of your lips against his joints has him stopped dead in his tracks. 

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Loves kids, is fantastic around kids. He is very large and is the perfect jungle gym for rambunctious children, but also can be very gentle and encouraging with any of the shyer ones who are intimidated by a large man made of metal. He’s still a bit of a stickler for rules and structure, no desserts before dinner and all vegetables must be eaten, but makes up for it by just being a really fun adult that kids kind of gravitate towards. 

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Piotr’s mornings are typically his busiest time; if he’s not working out in the morning, then he’s preparing for the day ahead with his various lessons. Is a very early riser as well, has an internal alarm clock that goes off at 6AM regardless of whether or not it’s a weekend and makes it so he cannot fall back asleep. 

Of course, that leads to morning cuddles if it’s the rare occasion where he actually doesn’t have a million things to do that day. He never takes those mornings for granted, holding you close and inhaling the scent of your shampoo and molding his body to spoon yours. If there’s nothing  else to do that day, he’ll spend the entire morning like that. 

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Piotr’s night time routine is less strict than his morning one, mostly focusing on winding down for the evening and getting comfortable before going to bed. A nice shower, pajamas and a chapter of the latest book he’s reading before turning off the lights and waiting for sleep to come. He tries to avoid any screen time before bed, if he can help it, but absolutely will get invested in whatever show you’re watching and will watch an episode with you before bed. 

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Piotr is a fairly open type of person as far as revealing things about himself, although isn’t the type to say it out of nowhere without a proper relationship being established. If you ask him anything, he’ll almost always give you a straightforward answer, but won’t necessarily give the nitty gritty details until a proper relationship and mutual trust is created. 

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Patience of a saint, it takes so much to get him to show any frustration beyond general annoyance or displeasure. True anger is difficult to get from Piotr, and is usually reserved for very specific circumstances or people. 

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He is the type to make notes in his phone if you mention you like a certain brand of something or a specific snack. Those flowers you mentioned offhand? He has a note in his phone and a reminder to place an order to the florist on Valentine’s Day and your birthday. It's an effort, and doesn’t necessarily come naturally to him to remember all the little details, but wants to make you happy so keeps a running list of things that make you happy. 

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

There’s a moment in the relationship where the dynamic shifts, where it’s less ‘I am trying to impress/entice this person into a relationship’ and it becomes more ‘this is my friend who I love but also am romantically involved with and would tear this world down for’. That moment would be Piotr’s favorite, and it would be a casual moment; the two of you in pajamas, perhaps both in the same room but idly doing your own thing. And it’s then that Piotr looks over at you, in one of his t-shirts and a face mask while you scroll absentmindedly on your phone,and  there’s something in that moment when you look up at him and smile that makes his heart clench. There’s nothing particularly special, but it’s you and him and he feels so…at peace in your presence. 

It’s at that moment he knows you could ask him to do anything, ask him to jump and he’d ask how high, and it both frightens and exhilarates him to know that you - wonderful, imperfectly perfect you - have this much power over him. A man who regularly faces life or death for a cause bigger than himself as casually as some people court lovers, and he’d throw it all down for the person sitting next to him. 

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’d wrap you in bubble wrap if he could, carry you down every flight of stairs if it meant your safety. Not because he doubts your ability or because he wants to undermine your autonomy, but because the thought of you getting hurt - especially when he could have prevented it - would kill him. If he can’t protect you, what is he? He’s the shield for his team, the battering ram when the situation calls for it, but for you he’ll be an entire suit of armor. 

Of course he knows that’s not feasible to always be there to save you, but it doesn’t stop him from always watching you a bit closer, having a hand at your side, or walking on the side of you that faces traffic. If you’d try to do the same for him, step in front of him or try to shield his body with your own - at first he won’t know what to think. He’s so used to being the one to take the hits, and to have someone willing to take them for him? Well, it’s going to take some getting used to, and it probably contributes to him falling for you a bit faster than he usually would. 

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts in a lot more effort than he puts on when it comes to dates and anniversaries and holidays. He has it planned down to the letter - your favorite restaurant, the flowers that you mentioned offhandedly that you liked, and the outfit you said he looked so handsome in. Of course, it’s played off as effortless, just another part of his routine, and you’ll quickly see the cracks start to form if something goes off course.

Just kiss his hand and assure him it’s perfect, as long as he’s there beside you,  and he’ll quickly resume sweeping you off your feet. 

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Stickler for routine, needs structure or else he will quickly fall into bad habits fueled by self doubt. Often questions his place in the grand scheme of things if he feels like he is not fulfilling his role as a protector, and can spiral very quickly into depression or self destructive habits. 

Also, he will wear shorts and a tank top no matter how cold it gets. He’s that kid, you know the one. 

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Piotr’s interesting in this regard - he doesn’t so much care for his looks as far as aesthetics go. I’ve touched on this in previous asks and various drabbles, but he lifts and works out to be strong rather than to look a certain way. It’s functional, and he's more of a strongman than a bodybuilder, if that makes sense. He works out and stays fit because it suits his lifestyle and helps him be the Colossus his team needs him to be, getting ripped isn’t so much the prerogative. Of course, he enjoys looking strong and like he could tear the doors off a car without trying, and he’s the type to change if he notices a stain on his shirt, but for the most part he’s not a very vain person as far as looks are concerned. He dresses for comfort and utility rather than fashion most of the time, but he has the capacity to dress up if needed. 

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Incomplete isn’t the right word. He’d feel like something was lacking, like he was missing something that would otherwise make him happy, but he would still be able to function. You don’t make him Piotr, just like he doesn’t make you…well, you. It’s an added bonus of having another person around, and it would be great if you were there and he’ll certainly miss you if you aren’t there, but he’ll be able to function without you. He’ll have to, at least that’s what he tells himself. 

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Okay, so the Russian stereotype of drinking vodka like it’s water is very prevalent, and yeah Piotr’s able to drink a lot and stay relatively sober, but he doesn’t really like the feeling of being inebriated beyond a slight buzz. It’s a dangerous game to get him really drunk, not only for anyone trying to keep up with him, but also for him. Drunk Piotr is a sad, sappy Piotr who is going to hold onto his friends or significant other and cry into their shoulder while forgetting his own strength. He has absolutely broken a few barstools (and a few bars) by getting too inebriated for his own good and completely forgetting that he can smash through most surfaces with little to no effort. 

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I think Piotr wouldn’t be a fan of people who are completely resistant to change or self improvement - he wants to grow and try new things with you! You can be hesitant, you’ll work up to it together and he’ll be the most supportive person in your corner, but to completely shut him down or resist it altogether would really dishearten him. I also think a lack of ambition would really turn him off - if you have a goal, no matter how small, he wants to be there to help you achieve it. 

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Once he settles down and is fully out cold, he does not move. Absolutely still, he’s conditioned himself to not to move or throw out an arm in fear it’ll strike out and break another bedside table. This will be doubled if you are sleeping beside him, he would be terrified of accidentally rolling over in his sleep on top of you!

[cat3ch1sm]

🧺~ hello, loves, and welcome to another post of my aggressive Valentine’s marathon in which i am running off of nothing but los tios and the random water bottle by my bed at 3am. but you didn’t see that. anyway, enjoy <33

chainsaw man- ft. denji, aki, power, kobeni, himeno, and makima <3

fem!reader

𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦- 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬

🍀 ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ 𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐢 ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ 🍀

denji is a really sloppy kisser- expect a lot of tongue and gasps for air. he’s just so eager to feel your lips against his and let his hands roam freely around your body 💚 if you have boobs fully expect his hands to latch onto them when you’re getting hot and heavy. he’s also happy letting you take control- he welcomes almost anything you do. just don’t, you know, puke in his mouth.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀

power, despite all her big talk and arrogance, will start out tentatively, exploring your lips and body. however, once she’s comfortable, she’ll be all over you. power is a really rough kisser, and she will definitely want to be in control. expect a lot of biting and bruised lips afterward. power also isn’t shy at all about marking you up- leaving hickeys all over your neck and drawing blood from your lips. she also loves to make out with you laying down, with her on top of you so she can exert complete control. power loves hearing the tiny whimpers you emit when she bites your lip or kisses your neck.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: 𝐚𝐤𝐢 *✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

aki isn’t one for roughness or sloppiness. he’s definitely very gentle. he doesn’t want to just chase his own pleasure, he also really wants you to enjoy yourself as well. he’ll only leave marks with your voiced consent, and he won’t touch you anywhere else on your body without asking “is this okay?” first. aki is big on sensuality. when he kisses you, he wants you to feel the emotion behind it as well. generally, aki likes to be in “control,” although he would rather it be more of a mutual thing than a specific person being dominant. sometimes he does like being dominant, though, and seeing your face flush and hearing the sounds you make when he’s on top of you.

◦◦,`°.✽✦✽. 𝐤𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐢 ✽✦✽.°`,◦◦

kobeni is pretty shy about initiating physical contact. don’t get her wrong, she’s down to be physical with you, but she just doesn’t know how to ask for it. so expect to have to start things yourself. however, when things get going, she’s pretty quick to reciprocate and let you know that she enjoys making out with you. she’s also kind of whiny, especially when you kiss her jaw, and kobeni really likes when you hold her around the waist and pull her close. she’s a very gentle kisser as well.

┊┊┊ 𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐨 ┊ ➶ ❁۪ ｡˚ ✧

himeno is a switch and i will die on that hill. while a lot of the time she loves being in control and making you whimper and gasp, she also doesn’t mind being the one who does so. when she’s on top, himeno is quite gentle for the most part- she doesn’t want it to be bad for you. she’ll tenderly cup your face with one hand while she kisses you and slowly move down your face to your neck, where she knows is most sensitive, so often she lingers there to get as much of a reaction from you as possible. she gives you whispered praises whenever you let her touch you elsewhere or make any sounds. her hands do tend to wander, mostly to your hips and probably your ass as well. just… don’t let her throw up in your mouth.

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐦𝐚 ₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

makima is always in control. although she isn’t the obvious type of controlling, like the type that just slams you down and does whatever they want with you, you’ll know she is because she will just not allow you to try anything that might imply your trying to take control. makima may let you think that you’re the dominant one for a bit, but if you actually start getting cocky she’ll make sure you’re put in your place. she’ll wrap her hand around your neck gently and make sure you don’t try anything. her hands are allowed to touch you wherever they please, but yours are only allowed to wander so far.

[loves1ckgirl]

Denki Kaminari with an online best friend

Denki x American! reader

Online friends + maybe romantic-ish

Note, I have no idea how to write in the grammar of someone learning English so I’m just avoiding contractions and using a bit of chat gtp to make the sentence to be a little more incorrect lol.

He initially met you while playing a FPS at 3am

The game between you and both was mostly silent aside from some English and Japanese cursing, Denki understood some what you said

You however; did not understand him, but assumed he was expressing the same frustration and wasn’t just getting upset at you

After your first game was played, he had sent you a few emojis and a little english

The game you had been playing along side some random from Japan had gone surprisingly well. It was such a bad game for the loser you wondered if it was because they were absolute garbage or all of a sudden you became a gaming god. As you leaned back in your chair and attempted to fix the knot that formed in your back from hunching, you looked back at your computer screen. There you see a friend and message request.

Kaminarieki

“You are good at playing. Can we play more?”

As you read the message, you decide to respond and pray he wasn’t some 30 year old incel. After all, you were bored, and a bit lonely.

After that first interaction, you would go on to play with him often

However, neither of you talked very often especially after you came to the conclusion you didn’t speak the same language

In the end, there were still some short convos

Kaminari liked these, as he thought you were cool

The fact that UA English classes were more rigorous helped him in talking to you (a hero needed to communicate with a large variety of people)

A couple of months in, he was struggling with his classes exponentially, and no amount of help by his friends would help him,

He then thought it was a good idea to message you and explain that he thought it would be nice to talk and learn through a fluent speaker instead

Kaminarieki

“Can we talk a lot I am learning English I think your cool.”

“I’m down. It’s late now though. I have school is tomorrow okay? Also, the your should be you’re”

Kaminari sends a cute little heart emoji,

“Yes. Thank you.”

For awhile, you’d avoid many abbreviations and some complex Slang

Eventually Kaminari had gotten more advanced and you spoke more casually

After exchanging Instagram and other accounts, instead of mostly talking as you guys played, it started during school and random times of day

The time difference didn’t mean much since the both of you had terrible sleep schedules

(Although, he was a bit more regular due to his hero school)

As you talked to him you obviously found more of his personality and it had become more endearing tbh

He’d most definitely google English pick up lines

Eventually as his friends noticed his behavior and how if he’d planned to play with you he’d decline

Also how he’d be texting more than before (mostly on his Sundays and Monday’s as you’d be awake the longest when he was.)

Lowkey hates the time difference tbh.

Anyway, as his friends noticed him typing away on those two days in particular they’d begun to ask questions about who he was texting

“My friend.” He’d say, looking up from the phone for a second before continuing the text. Mina had begun even more curious than previously.

“Whaaa? Friend? Who?” She asks, leaning over the couch and Kaminari’s shoulder. She sees joke flirty messages that he sends and receives.

He ended up telling them about you and explains that’s why his English grade was getting better

Anywayyy he’s overall super cute with you

Basically just being himself

If you ever wanted to learn Japanese he’d 100% do his best to help you enthusiastically

He tries his best to keep you updated since it’s its hard to talk to you regularly

[woojungz]

park seeun x fem!reader 🌼🪁

❝ one shot

𓂃𓈒 helping your best friend (to whom you have a miserable crush on) buy valentines gifts for someone else was probably the worst decision you've ever made. but that's what besties are for, right?

word count: 4.4k

author's note: typed out the initial plot on my notes app at 3am, got dizzy, then passed out. i thought when im gonna begin to fully write this out it's gonna be like a 1k word count kinda thing, but then boom… 4k. i really need to get used to writing longer fics, i find that i get very impatient and that i want to get it all done quickly! (⁠ꏿ⁠﹏⁠ꏿ⁠;⁠)

( likes and reblogs appreciated!♡ )

it’s monday again, your most dreaded day of the week. especially now in particular, thank god your classes were over, but the walk through the halls were a pain. not only were the valentine's day decorations already set up, but the student body was buzzing with all these talks about love, relationships, and couples.

you didn’t want to call yourself a hopeless romantic, but you couldn’t really toss away the sliver of thought that one day you’ll finally be able to understand all the fuss about valentines. so far, your advances when it comes to romantic matters weren't smoothly sailing. it’s just that… you’ve hit a rock when it comes to getting past the best friend level, as you call it.

and when you stop in front of his open locker door, you begin to recount the memories of your friendship and how all this one-sided romantic bullshit needs to come to an end once you graduate. thankfully though, you’re in your last year of high school, hoping to move to the far end of the city and forget about your silly crush.

you’re startled when he slams his locker door close, snapping you out of your thoughts. speak of the devil… you like to joke around that your neck might grow sore from the way you always have to look up at him.

“oh, y/n! perfect. i’ve actually been thinking about you earlier, wanna ask you about something.” his words melt into a chuckle as you nod in response. park seeun… the guy you have a silly little crush on. and of course you’re not gonna start having a session in your mind and ramble off about how dreamy and cool he is that you’ve developed feelings. enough of that corny nonsense. whatever it is, aside from the fondness you’ve developed with him being your best friend, you’re not really sure what’s drawn you in to want something more.

but hold on, what was he saying again? he’s been thinking of you earlier, and wants to ask you about something?

well… you were previously trashing on the cringiness of valentines and all but of course you can’t deny it—does he secretly have feelings for you and wants to ask you out on a date… for valentines?!

really, y/n. if those floating little angel and devil that hover on your shoulders do exist, they’d probably already smacked your head hard you’re gonna knock over.

let’s be real. it’s probably gonna be some dumb question that’s bound to piss you off.

“hm, what is it you wanna ask?” you reply, watching him sling his bag over his shoulder as you trailed beside him through the halls.

“i think it’s better if we talk about it somewhere by the bleachers.” his brow raises a bit, a grin tugging by his lips that you were so familiar with. he looks so charming right now, but you’re bringing those thoughts to the grave because for sure he’s never gonna let it go if you stroke his ego the slightest bit.

your lips parted at his response, raising your gaze back it him. “why at the bleachers though, can’t we just talk about it at some corner here?”

seeun begins looking around, seemingly in deep thought. “i wanna talk about it with you alone.”

oh. never in your life would you think that the same plot you’ve been witnessing in countless romance movies is finally gonna happen to you. there’s just no way he’s not gonna ask you on a date once you get to the bleachers by the football field. and add to that… he’s so serious right now you kinda miss the usual banter the two of you engage in everytime you’re together.

it’s just all clicking together too well… so you do your best in trying to suppress a squeal from your throat, ignoring the hammering beat of your heart in your chest. no way you’re gonna ruin the greatest moment that’s gonna happen in like what, five minutes? so you tune out the background noise as you wordlessly follow seeun to your destination, thinking of the perfect response to say when he asks you out on a date for valentines.

“oh… i don’t think i have any schedules past 3pm. i’d gladly go on a date with you!” well yeah dumbass… you guys have the same schedule that day so he knows what time you’re done. and what’s up with that last sentence, you sound too excited. that’ll totally not do...

“really seeun? i’ve been waiting…” gosh you sound like you’re utterly in love with him. well, if you don’t mind seeun making fun of how you’ve probably been crushing on him since forever, then go ahead. i’m just gonna leave a warning, you’re probably never gonna hear the end of it.

“you’re so sweet seeun, of course i’ll go with you.” the way you’ve managed to think of a worse response than the first two is honestly quite impressive.

argh… this kinda stuff is unexpectedly too hard, and you’ve got your stagnant love life to blame.

only when you hear the crackle of the grass beneath your shoes do you realize you finally reached the football field. seeun suddenly begins to run swiftly towards the bleachers as you follow suit. what do you expect from someone who self proclaims as your school’s messi.

you’re out of breath, laughing as you finally caught up to him. he doesn’t even look fazed from running, his hair a bit tousled by the wind. “so what is it then seeun… better make sure whatever it is you’re asking me is worth it. we had to walk all the way to the other side of the school building for this!” you tease, hoping to shake away the subtle nervousness inside you.

“alright then, i’m not gonna waste time anymore.” he stands closer to you now, hands in his pockets as you hold your breath.

“i need your help, i’m buying valentines gifts for someone else.”

oh.

and just like that, your fantasy was absolutely shattered.

“huh.” you snort, a frown immediately falling over your face. “why me…”

you look to the side, masking your disappointment with irritation. so he’s got a girlfriend now? how come you never saw him with someone else.

“well, wouldn’t you know what are the best gifts to get girls, since… you’re a girl yourself?”

you don’t know if your brows could get any more narrow than they already are. “park seeun logic i guess.”

“come on y/n! i never ask you for favors anyway.” he begs, hands together in a pleading pose.

“honestly i never expected you were the kinda guy to do all this romantic nonsense for valentines… thought your head was only full of bullshit.”

“what’d you say?!”

“full of bullshit. want me to spell it out for you?” you cock an eyebrow at him, but the way a giggle is starting to bubble up in his throat is suspicious. seeun suddenly holds out his arms, like he’s gonna tickle you once he gets his hands on you. “hey, hey—stop that or i’m not helping you out!”

your voice echoes throughout the field, starting a playful chase with seeun, running around in tiring circles over and over. you’re yelling as he catches up to you in no time, gripping onto your bag hung over your frame. you have his legs to blame, with the way every step of his is double the distance of yours.

and as you catch your breath, panting, you settled down on the grass with seeun claiming the spot beside you. you fish out your water bottle from your bag, along with a piece of paper and pen.

“don’t lose this alright.” you mumble, his attention towards you as he watches you scribble notes on the paper.

by a minute you hand it over to him, the tips of his fingers touching yours in the exchange, mentally slapping yourself from noticing the miniscule detail. got to move on from your silly crush right now, unfortunately.

he blinks at the inked words: flowers, chocolate, necklace, and… movie tickets

“i knew i could count on you! thanks by the way.”

“if it goes well for you then you have to order me chicken alright!” you were already starting to think of distancing yourself from him right after valentines, thinking it was the right move as he’s probably gonna spend most of his time with whoever his girlfriend is anyway. talk about a pity party while chowing down fried chicken.

“of course.”

you spare him a short glance at the reply before turning your head somewhere by the horizon. “i think i gotta go, the sun is gonna set in a moment.” standing up, you stuffed your water bottle back in your bag and dusted your clothes from the grass. you were about to walk away without a goodbye, but seeun was quick to catch your wrist.

“—wait, wait. one more thing.”

“what is it now.” you pulled your hand from his grip, preparing yourself for another one of his takes.

“can you accompany me tomorrow when i buy all this stuff?” he waves the now crumpled piece of paper, eliciting a huff from you.

“fine, whatever seeun. don’t need to act like i got a choice since you’re probably gonna drag me with you anyway!” you joke around with him, making the both of you laugh in unison. your eyes catch his one last time this afternoon, turning around to walk away from the field, his gaze never leaving your figure until you were just a blur in the distance.

it’s the day after you got indirectly rejected, yet you’re spending it with seeun.

“so, which flowers do you think are the best around here?” you watch as he points to a bunch of displayed bouquets on a shelf, awaiting your answer.

“i don’t know seeun… how about you ask the florist over there instead? they’re experts in this sort of thing.”

he looks back at you with his lips in a straight line, his hand sneaking around your wrist. “i wouldn’t be asking you to come with me here if i wouldn’t trust your opinion you know.”

to be fair, he has a bit of a point right now. you shake free from his grip, taking a step towards the shelf. “alright whatever, move aside and i’ll take a look.”

you inspect the rows on display, until a particular one catches your attention. seeun’s gaze never left you, and he swears he could almost see a spark within your eyes as you saw the bouquet.

“this one looks cute,” you pointed to your favorite one, seeun inching closer to you. “and the bouquet wrapping’s your favorite color too, isn’t it?”

you nod, eyes flickering to him. “yeah… but wait seeun, wouldn’t it be better if you buy one in their favorite color instead? feel like it’ll be a bit more personal—”

“nope, nope. i trust your choice so i’m getting that one.” he’s rushing over to the florist, huffing as you watch him make the purchase. he better not blame you if this backfires because of his stubborness!

you’re about to give him a rant about the whole scenario until you realize that he’d probably not listen to you since he’s so hardheaded, so you just remain silent. but as you’re walking with seeun on the way to the candy shop, you can’t help but notice everyone else looking at the both of you while passing by.

“what a sweet couple the two of you are!” you’re startled when an old lady suddenly blurts out as you walk by her on the sidewalk, shock riddled all over your face. you turn towards seeun, waiting for him to clarify that the two of you were indeed not a couple.

i mean, if you look at it from another perspective, some guy holding a bouquet of flowers along with a girl would definitely look like a couple. but seeun only laughs, leaving dead air in between every single one of you.

“oh, we’re just friends!” you chuckle, watching as seeun remains wordless, only releasing another laugh.

“what a shame, you look really good together,” the old lady adds, making you sheepishly smile at her.

seeun nods, initiating the two of you go on as he bids goodbye to the old lady. honestly, you were expecting him to quickly deny the allegation of being a couple, bracing yourself as he’d probably throw in a playful insult. something about how he’s never gonna be in a relationship with someone as crazy as you or whatever.

but it never came, and it made you even wonder why he was only laughing as the small talk ensued a while ago.

maybe he’s just busy thinking, right? you figured that must be the reason as he leads, approaching the candy shop nearby. yeah… he’s probably just thinking of all the sweets he might buy as you get there.

a little bell rings as you go through the door, eyes lighting up at the amount of candies and chocolates displayed all around.

seeun beckons you over to a display by the counter, wanting to choose from the selection of special chocolate bars the shop has prepared for valentines.

and he’s off again in his own little world, staring intently as you choose from the display. noticing the way you were beginning to pout subtly, even stepping closer to inspect the chocolates. “woah, this one has different flavors together. i’ll try this one soon once i get to come back some other time.”

seeun doesn’t wait a second to ask the cashier so he could purchase the one you were ogling on the display, teasingly waving the chocolate in front of you once he’s paid for it.

“hey park seeun! you know people have different tastes right, what if they don’t enjoy those flavors?” you strike a conversation as the two of you begin strolling by the sidewalk.

seeun scoffs, the bouquet and paper bags rustling with every step of his. “oh don’t worry about that, i’m sure they’ll like this. you know them very well anyway.”

“huh?! the hell does that even mean.” you send him a peeved look, trying to catch up to him as he starts speeding up his pace. “are you trying to say they’re in the same class as me?”

he continues to ignore you as he starts another playful chase by the street, not missing the grin tugging on his lips.

“hey! park seeun, stop being so cryptic. is that why you keep coming to our classroom?!”

your shouts faded into giggles as he turned a corner, suddenly knocking yourself on his back when you managed to catch up to him. “we’re already here by the way,”

at least you’re finally halfway done with this whole fiasco seeun invited you in. you can’t deny the growing sullen mood you’re feeling in your heart. there’s probably already a stormy cloud floating above your head and raining on you, except you’re not in some silly cartoon.

you begin to follow seeun inside the jewelry shop, the sparkle of displayed accessories were a blur as your mind kept running with countless thoughts.

all this time you were under the notion that seeun kept showing up at your classroom because he wants to hang out. you didn’t want to admit it, but the only conclusion that you could arrive on was that he’s probably just spending time with you because his girlfriend is in the same class as yours. you mentally facepalm yourself at how oblivious you’ve been all this time.

you snap out of it when he starts dangling a necklace in front of you, attention flickering towards the heart shaped pendant he laid over his palm. "this one's a bit cool isn't it? and it opens up so you could put a photo or something."

"hm, it's perfect if you wanna put a couple photo inside the locket!” you beam, meeting his gaze.

and he lets out a scoff, the same one he does whenever he's about to spew some nonsense.

"or... they could just put a photo of me! y'know, so they could look at it whenever they miss me or something."

he laughs at the way your expression fell, lips almost in a straight line as you glare it him. "i've honestly never met someone so full of themself like you."

"guess that probably means this ones the best choice out of all, gotcha!” you only scrunch your nose at him, feigning an eye twitch before he turns around to pay for the necklace.

you're honestly quite confused on how he could have you sinking into a sullen mood and have you reeling in irritation the next second.

park seeun you're such a mystery...

you were startled and greatly embarrassed when seeun’s voice blared throughout the hall of the cinema, earning a few sharp glares here and there. add to that… he was calling you by your name, walking towards him with your head hung low in shame.

“seeun! have some decorum, will you?” you kept your voice to a volume, landing a harsh slap on his arm. he hissed, rubbing the impact of your hit.

“yeah, yeah whatever. kinda your fault you’re standing too far away from me.” you acted as if you were gonna playfully smack him again, flailing his arms in front of him in defense. “i know you’re probably tired by now since we’ve been walking around since morning, but i’m sure you’ll love this one.”

he cheekily grins before pointing to the poster stuck on the wall, and seeun swears he’s seeing the same glint in your eyes again. “wasn’t this the movie you were spamming me about days ago?”

“yeah but—” you take a step forward before getting interrupted by seeun.

“great! then i’ll go ahead and buy tickets for this now, seems like a fun movie for a date, don’t you think?”

he’s quick to rush towards the counter, the squeak of his shoes fading away as you remain slumped in front of the movie poster. the same movie you’d always talk to him about, to the point of gushing over it, even. seeun knew how much you loved that movie series after begging him to watch it with you every time he’s over at your house.

when you found out about the news that it’s getting a new movie in theaters around this time of the month, you wasted no time in getting tickets for the two of you in advance, planning to invite him for a movie hang out right after valentines—having expected that seeun will share the same sentiments as you, that valentines was pure bullshit and that he’d rather spend a day with his best friend than all that lovey-dovey nonsense.

guess not anymore. as you follow him out of the cinema, you couldn’t care less about what he was babbling about, his voice a mere blur as you hear it. sinking into this miserable reverie of having to probably drop your fixation towards your favorite movie series, because now it just reminds you of him. how he inadvertently rejected you.

“are you okay y/n? you’ve been out of it ever since we started walking to the bus stop.”

curse seeun and his hyper aware self, always sensitive to your moods and such. making it even harder for you to move on, as you call it.

but he was met with silence, trudging along to your unusually faster pace tonight. he’s your best friend after all, so he pushes, even poking his finger repeatedly on your shoulder to get you to talk.

you’ve had enough of dealing with him today, wanting to hear the end of it. and so you dig your heel on the concrete, meeting his eyes with a glare as you raised your voice. “would you quit it!?”

thank god there was no one else around, only the chirp of the crickets and your heavy breathing. “alright, alright geez… it’s just, if you’re not feeling okay, then i don’t wanna leave you going home by yourself.”

he gently presses the back of his hand to your forehead, to which you harshly swatted away. the bus conveniently neared the two of you, immediately rushing to step into the vehicle once it came into a halt. seeun’s eyes never left your figure until you disappear in his sight, taking a seat on the opposite side of the bus that's further away from him.

and he watches the bus leave into the distance, unaware of the heartbreak you carried all the way home.

you were honestly surprised that no tears threatened to well up as you rode the bus home, until you slammed your bedroom door shut did it all come flooding in.

seeun and his stupid—his stupid attitude, stupid obliviousness, stupid… stupid everything!

you also blame yourself for choosing to spend the whole day with him, at this point it’s like you're begging your heart to get shattered to pieces. you bury yourself in the sheets to comfort yourself, seemingly making it worse as you recognize hints of seeun’s familiar cologne on your blanket, making you burst to tears even more.

you even start to wonder if you’d done any crimes your past life that led to all your current predicament: at the end of the day, he’s got this collection of gifts that you like, except… he’s not gonna give it to you. and knowing seeun, he’s probably gonna force you to come with him as well to help with his valentines surprise, and you have to plaster on a stiff, fake smile and pretend everything else is alright only your end.

and about those movie tickets… you’d probably just set a bonfire to throw it in and watch your hard earned money burn into ashes, pretending your heartbreak’s also fading away with it.

talk about brutal. you scoff, stuffing your face impossibly closer to your pillows, crying yourself to sleep.

you surprisingly felt numb when you woke up to the sun streaming through your blinds, immediately unlocking your phone to a dozen missed alarms and… calls.

you couldn’t even care less about missing class today. despite the way you cried your heart out last night, the wound still felt fresh as you read a bunch of notifications that came from seeun.

it was a bit difficult to read from your puffy, half-awake eyes, but you managed to see his messages asking why you’re late, begging you to come today. all because he’s apparently gonna give you the coupons to that fried chicken place he promised.

you groaned, rolling over to the other side of the bed, contemplating. fuck fried chicken honestly, if it means having seeun witness your horrible state right now, you’re out of there.

unfortunately, you always manage to amaze yourself at your audacity to go against your thoughts, letting your feelings lead your decisions instead of being rational.

thankfully seeun’s nowhere to be found as you attended the rest of your afternoon classes, hoping no one would notice the remnants of a breakdown from your eyes.

pft… and why would you even be looking for him anyway. starting today, you’d wanna avoid him as much as possible, so you’d successfully move on, right?

but as you clutched your bag tight, walking through the halls as class was dismissed, it just made you even more bitter seeing the couples around you be all over each other. you wonder why you even bothered to come in late when you'd wanna just skip today's classes because valentines irks you to the core.

you didn’t even care anymore as you pushed through the crowd of people, along with a blur of reds and pinks from the littered valentines decorations all around, almost making you wanna throw up from cringe.

but you yelp when you suddenly got yanked at a random corner of the hall, ready to kick your ‘kidnapper’ into oblivion until you look up, craning your neck far too much until you realize it’s seeun.

and you don't miss the sight of the bouquet of flowers and gifts he's holding behind him.

"really seeun? i'm not gonna be helping you with handing it to them. you're on your own now by the way. i know you can do it." you say, face completely deadpanned.

“wait—” he firmly grasps onto your bag once you turned in an attempt to leave. “if this is about the fried chicken, i don’t care anymore. just keep it, i’m going home.”

“y/n i think you’ve got it all wrong.”

he doesn’t let go of your bag, trying to free yourself from his hold, fuming.

“yeah, it’s so wrong trying to shove to my face that you finally got yourself your own love life! i know we banter all the time but i also have my limits.” he watches as you raise your voice at him, a hurt expression falling over your face, one that he doesn’t like.

"just because we're best friends doesn't mean you can ask me for help with this kinda stuff! because what if... what if i..." what if i actually have feelings for you? you choke on your words, preventing yourself from blurting out an unwanted confession.

seeun's hold on your bag turns weak, his eyes softening. "what if you what, y/n? you've been acting weird since yesterday and i'm honestly getting a bit worried. tell me what's wrong then, so i can help you feel better."

"it's not something you could help with." you turn your gaze at the lockers, anywhere but focusing him.

“y/n if you just listen to me for a second then we’ll—” he attempts to calm you down, until you interrupt.

“you just don’t get it because you’re a guy!”

he takes a deep breath before grabbing your shoulder with his free hand, shaking your frame with every word he lets go. “all these gifts are for you y/n. it’s my valentines surprise for you!”

you take a step back, mouth parted in confusion.

“is this some kind of sick joke?”

“god… do i even have to spell it out. i like you, more than friends… or best friends! l-i-k-e y-o-u. got that?”

he lets out all of his thoughts, desperate that you get the message, rendering you speechless.

"i'm not really that good with words but... i've had feelings for the longest. i hope these gifts could make you realize how i feel?"

“me too seeun, it's a bit embarrassing to admit that i like you as well... i just, got a bit confused since you were talking about it as if you’re giving it to some other person. i'm sorry about what happened yesterday.” you look away from him, focusing on the floor instead.

“you know i got you always, right y/n? besides, why’d i give it to someone else when i got gifts that are personally your favorites?”

he finally got his point across as you let out a huff, rolling your eyes as you let him stare down at you with that beady gaze of his, feeling his fingers ghost towards your neck as he laces a necklace around it.

“well, what can you say about it? did i do good in trying to find out what gifts you’re gonna like huh?” you roll your eyes once again, snatching the chocolate and bouquet of flowers from him. you wordlessly linked your arm with his, starting to wander through the halls, biting your lip to keep yourself from smiling. you swear he’s never gonna let it go if he sees you show the littlest bit of enthusiasm over his gift.

as you step outside the field of the school once again, you manage to break the silence, looking up at him. “oh. but i… i did buy us tickets for the movie as well. it was supposed to be a surprise.”

“you’re so bad at surprises y/n, you know that?” he flicks your forehead, earning a glare.

“coming from you?!”

“yeah, well… you seemed to be happy with it from the way you were avoiding my eyes once i handed—hey, hey— wait y/n i’m just kidding, don’t hit me with the bouquet! y/n! @#%@&”

[shmowder]

Hi!! Absolutely adore and love your writing it’s become like a drug to my brain! So I come baring a request! Can I get some general hcs on how it would be like to (non sexually!) sleep with Artemy,Daniil, Maria and Eva at night!

Thanks kindly if you end up writing this one!!

Thanks for clarifying it's nonsexual, I genuinely would've misinterpreted it otherwise. You're so sweet!!!! <333 I'm glad to hear that.

Sharing a bed with them

[fluff, cuddling]

[Daniil, Artemy, Maria, Eva - GN Reader]

Daniil Dankovsky

It depends greatly on if he's still residing at the stillwaters or not.

Despite the many overnight stays at work and sleeping over his desk in Thanatica Labs, Daniil rarely feels comfortable in any bed that's not his own.

Resulting in a very stiff Dankovsky laying next to you on the mattress, staring at the roof in offence as if it was its fault that the pillow under his head feels wrong no matter how much he adjusts it.

The night is uneventful.

He is the first to wake up–courtesy of never getting much sleep to begin with.

Now, if you were back at his apartment at the Capital instead?

You'd notice the massive difference.

His bed is completely catered to his personal taste, having picked everything out with immaculate care, down to the type of feather stuffings inside his pillows.

Daniil is a many pillows person, you found out.

Yes, even the small decorative ones, he has those.

Like a fish in water, he's completely in his element.

Tense shoulders softening as he sink into the mattress below, jaw unclenching as he buries his face into the pillow.

He enjoys sleeping on his left side.

Depends on how close the two of you are, 9 times out of ten, he'd politely offer you the bed and take the couch himself.

But if your relationship is more on the intimate side and this isn't your first time sharing a bed or being in such close proximity.

Then he'd assume you know you're very welcome in his bed.

It is a little jarring at first to see him without the his heavy coat or the many layers of clothes he adorns.

Seeing the bachelor without his red cravat was akin to witnessing a peacock without its colourful feathers.

Daniil does change into a full sleep set with a button-up long sleeves shirt and matching pants.

Made from breathable cotton, accent colours decorating the collar and cuff ends.

Fitting him comfortably. The "business-casual" of pajamas, something you wouldn't be embarrassed to be seen in by your boss if they dropped for a 3am surprise visit for whatever reason.

He has multiple sets that he cycles between, actually.

But that's a conversation for another day.

Daniil might not initiate touch himself, but if you happen to curl into his embrace or wrap an arm around his waist, Daniil wouldn't pull away.

Moving closer to you in his sleep, the heat of your body feels heavenly against his own under the warm blanket.

By the time you wake up, he's still there.

Sleeping on his side, facing you.

Realising how much softer his face looks relaxed, his overworker mind offered momentary peace.

He might not admit it, but the warmth of your embrace is a luxury he wishes he could indulge in more often, something he'll never take for granted.

-

Artemy Burakh

Whatever preferences and qualms about sleeping he used to have were smoothed out by the army barracks life

He can have the most restful sleeps on any surface.

Even a couch is more than sufficient for his power naps.

At the beginning of his return to the town, he slept stiffly.

Barely moving and staying in place, any twists or turns were the results of another nightmare plaguing his brain.

So as he gets accustomed back to the blissful domestic life where he has his own large bed–an actual bed this time around, unlike the wooden plank makeshift bed in his lair–his old habits slowly return

Artemy moves a lot in his sleep, you found out.

Sleeping on one side and waking up on the other, blanket on the floor, one pillow across the room for some reason.

His previous trait of being a light sleeper fizzles out as he gets accustomed to the security of a safe life.

Becoming more and more heavier of a sleeper.

His bed can fit the two of you, albeit snugly courtesy of his sheer size.

But Artemy has no problems with sleeping next to someone.

He used to have a lot of sleepovers as a kid, Lara, Stakh, and Grief using him as a pillow a lot.

So why don't you sleep on his arm instead of sticking to the wall like a bug?

Even without a blanket, his body feels warm next to your own.

With your head on his shoulder as he laid on his back, you watch the rise and fall of his chest.

Through the hours of the night, his hold on you doesn't falter even as he moves and turns.

You're helplessly dragged with him to the other side of the bed.

From the way his sleeping form keeps hugging you with no intent of letting go, you wonder if he used to sleep with a teddy bear or a plushie as a kid.

Artemy still remembers the way he used to tiptoe to his father's bed at night whenever he was having bad dreams

Isidor welcoming him in without any qualms or fuss.

Even as his son grew tall into his awkward teenage phase, the safety of his dad's embrace stayed a constant in his life, an open option he could seek every night.

Which is way on any given night, it's not strange to find either of Sticky or Murky fast asleep by his side.

Especially Sticky who used to occupy the chair at the end of his makeshift bed each time Artemy slept in the lair, watching over him as if he's afraid the other will abandon him in the middle of the night.

Murky prefers her own bed more, personal space being an important thing to her.

But she still stands in the doorway of his bedroom shyly at least once a month, clearly wanting to join the three of you but too prideful to admit it.

Artemy getting up with an amused smile, picking her up and heading back to bed.

With the four of you in bed, it is a snug fit.

Murky on top of Artemy like a stubborn cat, having hogged one of the pillows to hug as she used his chest as her own mattress.

Sticky on his left, sleeping on his arm because it was his pillow that Murky stole, complaining that his dad's sweater is too ancient and stray wool pieces keep irritating his face.

Finally, you are on his right with your back to the wall.

Choosing to ignore the concerning creeking sound coming from the frame of the bed under you four.

Maybe it is time you convinced Artemy to invest into a bigger one.

-

Maria Kaina

Silky sheets and valvet covers, Maria's bedroom is the embodiment of luxury and elegance.

Yet you can't shake the feeling that something lurks beneath the glamorous surface.

The cracked mirror on her vanity, shattered glass shards still remaining a whole piece despite the gap in the middle.

The aftermath of someone's fist colliding against its own reflection, bloodied knuckles slammed into the glass, shattering the brittle mirror.

Maria often invited people to her wing of the crucible, she doesn't go to others, they come to her instead.

And while that bed has seen her share fair of one night lovers, they never overstayed their welcome.

Maira... doesn't remember the last time she has let someone sleep by her side, just sleep.

The last time she entrusted another soul enough to remain defenseless next to them throughout the dead night.

She keeps a journal–a diary under one of her pillows, you discover it by accident as you adjust in bed.

She's quick to snatch it away, locking it safely in a drawer without offering a single explanation.

Adorning a crimson floor-length nightgown, ruffles alongside the shoulders, a matching robe on top. Both parts of the same set.

Her usually loose hair is secured by a tie in a low bun

other times, it's braided to the side.

whichever hairstyle makes it easier to untangle in the morning, she's not picky.

The mattress is more on the firmer side, the kind that adjusts your spine to it rather than the other way around.

It's good for your back, she explains.

Despite it being a queen sized bed, Marine lays directly in the middle, a force of habit.

Rather than split it in half.

You either stay near the edge of the bed and risk rolling over and falling during the night.

Or take the risk of snuggling up to her.

While a head injury pales in comparison to certain death, you still pick the more exciting option.

She already agreed to let you sleep in her bed...that at least shows that Maria feels comfortable around you.

Her breath hitches when you lay your head atop her shoulder

laying so close to hers, she can almost feel your body heat.

There is a moment of silence as she clearly contemplates her next course of action.

Before giving you an annoyed look, you think oh no, you're doomed.

Until her arm sneaks under your waist, curling around your back and pulling you closer to her.

"If you're going to cling to someone, at least do it properly."

Her skin is cold.

You run your fingers down her back soothingly, she tries to downplay how reactive to the touch she is.

As if no one has granted her a tender touch in years, she hasn't been shown this...delicate form of love since a long time ago.

...not since she was a kid, clinging to her mother's skirt after accidentally ripping the arm off of her favourite doll.

Maria attempts to remain stiff next to you, to school her expression into neutrality.

But amidst the darkness of the room, the realisation that you couldn't see her features even if you tried offers comfort.

Easing her into a sense of safety, her jaw unclenches, after what seemed like an hour, she finally lets go and melts into your embrace.

As the morning comes, she doesn't dare acknowledge the previous night nor speak a word of it.

Back to her usual smug and confident demnour.

Still...she trails at the end of her sentence, a subtle open-ended invitation to spend the night over again whenever the need arises.

Maria doesn't mention the fact her dreams ceased by your side,

That for one night, her mind was put to rest.

No future-plagued visions, no voices from the grave calling her name, no omens of what's to come.

A silent, restful sleep.

And someone's warmth lulling her into a sense of safety.

-

Eva Yan

Fresh out of the shower, having washed the soot of the day off of her, Eva is ready to curl under the convers and doze off.

Her sleep pyjamas are loose and airy, thin straps that keep falling down her shoulders, a pastel pink babydoll nightdress, the short skirt flares at the bottom.

The hair she keeps up in a ponytail is let down, strandends brushing against her shoulders, brushed throughly at her vanity after being dried.

You watch her go about her nightly routine with interest

How comfortable she is in her own skin, how much she pampers herself with cherry blossom scented lotions.

A beautiful smile adorning her lips as she meets your eyes in the mirror, offering you some.

Not wanting to strip to put on the lotion after you got comfy in your sleepwear, you politely refuse.

Eva insists that you should at least try on her chapstick.

It's strawberry flavoured.

Her fingers grip your chin gently, tilting your head upwards to meet her as she puts on the chapstick for you.

It does, in fact, smell sweet.

The atmosphere is light, reminiscent of a sleepover you'd have with a best friend.

Only she can get any person to feel as comfortable with her as an old best friend in such a record time.

Her bed is akin to a cloud stolen from the sky above.

The mattress sinks below your weight, engulfing half of you into it.

Fluffed up pillows stuffed with feathers, a soft cover that's seamless against your skin.

Multiple blankets, in fact, a lot of blankets.

She likes layering them on top of her rather than getting a big one.

Enjoying the feeling of their weight against her skin.

Plus this just means she'll always have enough blankets no matter who comes over.

Eva even takes her favourite blanket with her whenever she's off to spend the night over in a friend's house.

Trust her, you don't want to see the monster she becomes once a fight over the blanket starts.

Because she will win.

Her sharp well-maintained nails aren't just for show.

As her cheerful smile returns to place, you're urged to move on to more important subjects.

Such as, would you care to share a glass or two before bed? Red or white? She keeps both bottles right next to her nightstand, you don't mind the lack of glasses, right? Wonderful!

Blowing out the candles illuminating the room, a slightly tipsy Eva is finally ready to go to bed.

For real this time, no more stalling.

Only five minutes—no six, pass before you're delicately nudged as a quiet "Hey, are you awake?" follows.

You see, she just remembered the funniest story about a cat she saw today.

Would you like to hear it? Of course you would! So she was walking near the river, getting some fresh air as autumn finally cleared out.

Not that winter is any better. It's just more preferable to the twyre bloom season.

To be honest, the chilly weather isn't her style.

She's more of a summer child, but the sparkling snow always makes up for the harsh weather.

But it is a good excuse to share her bed more, nothing is better than to cuddle up next to another's warm body during the cold winter nights.

Which just reminded her, you do plan on staying in the town during the winter season, right?

She'd be so sad if you left so soon.

Even more sad that you never got the chance to view this town during the blossoming spring, the trees flourish and greenry fills the steppe.

She admits that she misses spending more time outside, staying in her house all day probably isn't the best for her.

But Eva doesn't talk to the Stamatins anymore. The Bachelor is always working, and Maria never has the time for her now that she started coming into her Mistress position!

Yulia barely squeaks a word in her presence no matter how friendly Eva tries to be.

She really has no one...so you can't refuse if hypothetically she asked you to accompany her to a picnic tomorrow afternoon?

it will make the most sweet memory, the two of you can watch the sunset together, share dessert and she could read to you one of her romance books.

Oh–sleep. yes right, ah she forgot. Do forgive her, she gets over excited sometimes.

Would you like to...cuddle maybe? She'll play with your hair until you've fallen asleep.

Sweet dreams.

[lady-of-the-silver-lakeatron]

Bridgerton Season 3 Episode 1 Initial Reactions

I didn't get to post these reactions so I'm posting them late as I needed time to edit all my 3am typos (cry) from Thursday.

Bless Francesca for being the funniest lowkey Bridgerton with that piano playing scene.

I swear I paused the Colin glow up reveal scene to analyze everyone's reaction. My top choices are Anthony and Kate and Bennedict.

ABC reunion + Gregory being adorable. I love when they show the sibling interactions.

Backs up, did I just see ASL from a debutant! That is so cool!

Queen Charlotte is having none of these people lmfao

Not Eloise getting dragged by Colin by her fashion choices (peak brother-sister vibes)

Stop- Francesca: “y'all are chaotic yappers the lord cannot present me a harder challenge”

Featherington's! I almost forgot both of Pen's sisters were married here! I keep remembering the book (romancing Mr. Bridgerton) and that the show has arranged things differently.

Prudence's man (I cannot/ do not remember his name) is giving such strong Kenergy.

Would it be the Featherington household without financial drama?

Eloise - Pen meet up, omg the heart break in their eyes!!

Cressida, when I get you!! It has been 0.5 seconds since this girl got to this garden party and she's already bullying Pen. Girl breathe.

Cressida-Eloise is intriguing as a dynamic I’m afraid. Also, Pen’s sad little face (cry)

I'm a bit confused with Francesca's interest in the marriage mart right now as she seems to prefer being around small groups of people and does not have much interest in being around guys. It feels as if this is a chore she must fulfil.

Kate -Violet solidarity is so cute to see after the angst of last season

Lady Danbury in the white ensemble with the top hat is looking magnificent I want her to poke someone with her cane!!

I'm liking the make up on Kate much more this season??? She seems a lot more glowy and rosy, maybe it's the lighting or something but her make up looks different.

I'm so sorry but Colin getting all this attention after having a literal hot girl summer is vv funny. Like he's in his early 20s lmao, but he is not giving confidence he is giving slightly awkward line reading with no chemistry. In the books him being more rakish was believable because it was set 10 years later.

Colin meeting and talking to Pen, side eye my boy. I'm loving the costuming choices to visibly show they are both uncomfortable/ do not fit their clothes well and it’s so starkly done. Poor Pen in this yellow dress makes her look a lot more juvenile (which isn't bad but it is unflattering). And Colin with what I am assuming are Anthony hand me downs since that jacket looks frumpy. The parallels!

Omg "Go home and get to work" Mrs.Featherington is so unserious

One sentence horror story "I take comfort in knowing you will always be there to take care of me". Get out miss Penelope runnn

Colin had one slutty slutty summer and the fact they keep trying to frame it as mostly intellectual is sending me.

Eloise reading Jane Austen! Is this character development?

Every scene so far where Pen and Eloise see each other gives the vibe of two exes meeting after the most devastating break up, I appreciate this framing so much because losing your childhood girl best friend is one of the most painful types of breakups.

ABC hang out?? Bennedict responsibility arc?

"She is colder now I am afraid" is a wild way to say someone is dead.

NEWTON!! BABY!! KANTHONY! IN! BED! BEING ROMANTIC!!

Damn! We're getting steamy af scenes already in the first episode! Anthony needing to go down on his wife to start off the day is certainly something I can get behind.

OOh this outfit reveal! Yessssss bb Pen eat them up! Penelope having a *debut* moment.

Aww the Featherinton spouses are sweet.

I see you Colin with that side eye

Omg Penelope being a bombshell and being socially awkward is so cute. You’ll figure it out soon bb don’t give up, they’re just jelous!

Ooh these girls are not liking Eloise they're sus

I'm a little uninterested in the queen charlotte diamond drama atm

Francesca: Live Laugh Love the piano forte

These guys are being so rude to Fran like let the poor girl speak! You’re traumatizing her.

Kanthony dancing and Kate's dress to reference the Bridgerton blue?? Oh the costume department has served.

Aww walflower solidarity with Francesca and Penelope. They're both the more reserved of their family, it's sweet moment between the two and the encouragement!

I know we won't love lord Debling but he's looking so sweetly at Pen and being so welcoming compared to everyone else.

CRESSIDA they can never make me like you, you little brat.

Yes, Pen eat him up give it to him tell him!!! "You miss me but you would never court me". GET HIS ASSS!!

 I fear our girl will be writing some scathing lady Whistledown.

This man threatening the Featheringtons is a gremlin, and I am getting bad vibes.

This conversation about the pitting of women against each other is valid social commentary but I cannot focus on it as it appears Cressida has murdered a flock of flamingoes to make her outfit.

Self-awareness, Cressida, does not free you from your crimes!

Kanthony is serving this episode. I appreciate this blissfully married life on them! Also Kate’s outfits are so intricate and beautiful. She has come so far.

Francesca so far feels like an external character, and it was similar in the novels until we got to her book. I really hope we get more context for her outlook soon.

Colin, what are YOU doing here. The way that Luke N is serving this season, whew. I really can buy his clueless innocence at his friendship with Pen, but finally the plot is plotting!

I'm very confused by this Baron Kent plot line and its introduction in the first episode.

OOH the drama for Colin's Whistledown dress down.

She really said he ain't shit, it's a facade, a ruse, he's a sad little attention whore

Colin: FUCK lady whistle down all my homies hate lady whistle down.

I'll keep it short. It was simply exhilarating. I love being back it's like slipping into a comfy worn hoodie. It's good to be back!

[setsugekka]

『paradise lost』 ; 07

❝ nobody has to know ❞  

↳ an old acquaintance comes back around at a time when you’re even more in relationship limbo than usual, you know your actions will have consequences should they ever be found out, but maybe the risk is worth the reward.

⎯ ୨previous୧ ⎯  ○  ⎯ ୨series mlist୧ ⎯ ○ ⎯ ୨next୧ ⎯

『 pairing 』 : park seonghwa x fem!reader

『 genre 』 : romance, angst, explicit sexual content.

『 rating 』 : mature

『 word count 』 : 9.2k

『 warnings 』 : really poor decision making probably, rough sex, consensually recorded sexual acts, oral sex (m), penetrative sex, dirty talking etc they are pretty emotionally careless with one another, horror scene of a twist ending (angst)

“hey lol”

When the text comes through, past the jarring initial response of hopefulness and wishful thinking of who it could be, your next immediate reaction is to hide the screen...turn it the other way, from potentially prying, curious eyes on the other side of the bed.

The problem with that being: you are alone, in your own apartment, not at Hongjoong's as was once common place.

Rolling over in bed and lying on your back, still staring at the screen — reading the time, 2:45am, you hate the fact that you're awake, struggling to sleep these past few nights now on your own, but even more than that, why was he texting you this late, and after so long.

Realistically, it hadn't been that long since your first contact with the man, though. A year or so back at a mutual friend’s graduation party — the tall, pretty guy with the long black hair in the front, sides and back shaven short — you recall being wholly unsurprised when he tells you that he does some modeling, far more so when he tells you that he's pre-med. Not that a gorgeous man can't be both, of course.

Hitting it off, you exchanged numbers and texted occasionally, but with busy schedules (mostly on his end) it was next to impossible to meet up, and as a result, texting would die off as well.

You hadn't expected to hear from him again; ever, really.

>you: don't think I know you well enough for you to be booty call texting me at 3am

A playful response back, but also testing his motives. The typing bubble pops up almost immediately, and a reply comes through just as quickly.

>Seonghwa: very funny. what a warm welcome. 'wow Seonghwa so great to hear from you it's been so long!' awww thanks, it's nice to hear from you, too.

You roll your eyes at the conversation he begins having with himself, already beginning to type back to him.

>you: men usually text this late for one thing, you know that as well as I do.

>Seonghwa: well I hope that 'thing' is picking out an outfit for a thing I have coming up because that's actually what i'm texting you for. I need your assistance tomorrow.

>you: tomorrow? thanks for the heads up dude...what if I have stuff going on?

>Seonghwa: i'm not above begging. I just got back in town like 45 minutes ago okay i'm working with the best that i've got. we can use the time to catch up. plsplspls.

Rolling your eyes again, you confirm a time and a place with him, receiving numerous different heart and smiley emojis back in response before shutting your phone off and setting it back down on the empty bed space next to you.

Being back in your own place feeling so foreign to you now.

Your mind wanders back to Hongjoong and what it is that he could possibly be up to at this time of night; no doubt out with friends, drinking, smoking, partying — dealing with his emotions the one way he knows best — not. Almost certainly drunk past the point of making good choices and quite probably bringing someone back to the very place you had made yourself so comfortable only days ago.

Screwing your eyes shut tightly, you try to force back the mental image of exactly how your best friend likes to deal with his problems — a couple of stiff drinks and being over, or under, someone else.

Grabbing your phone again, you shuffle through your texting app to bring back up your conversation with Hongjoong, last message sent four days ago — four days since that conversation in his kitchen, him disappearing off to who knows where in a huff after the fact and you texting him that you're taking some of your things and spending some time back at your place.

With no response from him, of course.

“hey lol”

You chuckle at yourself lightly at the fact that you're really considering sending him the same thoughtless text that Seonghwa had just sent you minutes ago, before backspacing it all entirely and locking your phone again, gently tossing it off and towards your side in a hearty exhale of desperation, exasperation...

Missing him.

And of course you know, you've known that you're in love with Hongjoong. You're in tune enough with your feelings to know it, despite being entirely unwilling to admit it to him — not without something more concrete, not without him giving up and giving in just a little. You don't think it's a lot to ask of him, to put his hurt, and his worry, and whatever it is that clings to and harms him so deeply — to take a leap of faith and just say the words, the words that are so painfully obvious to the both of you.

That maybe he isn't necessarily in love with you, not yet — but he wants you, wants you all for himself. To be had and held by no one else. Is it too much to ask, to hear the words from his mouth without using them as a means to an end to make the both of you come?

A man so aware and enlightened, only willing to use his words when he knows he can take them back — not completely, but any deeper meaning behind them.

‘All talk, of course, it doesn't mean anything.’

Much like the first time.

And in spite of conversation number one not going according to plan, you find your chest empty at the loss of him next to you — wherever it may be that Hongjoong finds himself on this night, it's with your heart alongside, tightly in hand.

You only hope that he's thoughtful enough to be aware of it, to not make any rash decisions; for all intents and purposes perhaps—

For him to be better than you.

“So, what are you looking for, exactly?”

Stepping through the large, perfectly polished glass doors just behind the man that you've met with, you look around momentarily — luxury brands and department stores far from something that you're uncomfortable or unfamiliar with, it's not all that often that you find yourself shopping about in such places, given Hongjoong's interest in the more 'far out' of fashion trends, as it were — this, a place for people with money, and who want to look like they have money.

It reminds you of Wooyoung, mostly. Expensive, untouchable. The opposite of Hongjoong in every way.

“Not a suit but,” he slowly answers, head only slightly turning back and looking as if he's even more out of his depth than you are. “Something...nice.”

“Not giving me much to work with, here.”

Seonghwa stops in the middle of the fragrance department, you nearly bumping into him from behind at the abrupt halt — looking around, you watch him intently, as if awaiting his next command on where it is that the two of you should head off to.

Hair still the same, black and swept off to the side of his face, sides shaved and neat — you take a second to enjoy the view, beautifully effeminate features, perfect teeth, and when he opens his mouth, such a deceptively heavy, deep voice.

Enough to knock anyone off their game, even just a little bit.

But the truth was, that Park Seonghwa was kind of a fucking nerd.

Not in the typical way, perhaps like Yunho — ex-pro gamer, but more in the sense of being a little awkward in a way that one might not expect upon laying eyes on him. Easy to assume a cold, tough personality to the man, but not so much the case at all.

He was awkward. Sexy, but definitely awkward.

“Is just a button down shirt nice?” he finally asks, making eye contact with you again after scanning the expanse of the room.

“It really depends on where you're going, was there no dress code?”

“Business casual, I think it said.”

“Oh!” you chime, all of the day's problems solved with ease at the description. “That's easy then, yes, you can get away with a nice button down. See? When you give me information to work with...”

A few strides into the direction of the men’s section, the both of you fanning through different colors and brands of shirts, Seonghwa finally pipes up in a lull of quiet from the typical, dull small talk.

“So,” he says plainly. “Are you seeing anyone?”

You're thankful for the way that he cannot see nor hear the way your heart drops at the question alone.

Swallowing hard, eyebrows furrowing just for a moment as if to collect your thoughts, you finally reply. “Um, yeah. I guess. It's kind of complicated, though.”

“What does that mean?”

And in most situations, you wouldn't want to open up about the situation. Still too new and raw and painful to the touch, but the lack of the ability to do so eating you up inside in such a way that the pain drawls on endlessly — Seonghwa probably isn't the right person for this discussion, but frankly, you're not really sure who would be.

You just know that right now you're dying inside, so it has to be somebody, and well...he's offering.

“I've been seeing this guy for the past bunch of months, we're actually best friends, or were— before all of this,” you begin, sighing between the statements and emotional exhaustion from it all evident. “He's obviously into me, just like I am into him, I'd love to just...be in a relationship with him but he can't...talk, say the words. Be vulnerable.”

“Real tough guy, huh?” Seonghwa quips as he pulls a navy blue shirt off of the rack to check the size and fit against himself.

“Not really, that's what really gets me,” you start again. “He's really not that sort of macho, out of touch with his feelings kind of stereotype dude that you'd expect, but I guess anyone can have their problems with intimacy.”

“You're sure he wants what you want?”

The question comes out of left field, especially from the man just across the rack from you — and despite not needing it, you do take a moment of pause to think the question over before giving the same answer you would have either way.

“Yeah, I'm sure.”

Seonghwa sets the shirt back onto the metal tubing from where it came before leaning forward onto it with arms crossed and chin pressed against them to look at you.

“Then he kinda needs to shit or get off the pot, ya know? Tell him to grow up.”

“I don't think it's that easy. If it were that easy I think he would have by now, there's something else there holding him back.”

“Are you fuckin' other people still?”

The question gives you whiplash, the velocity at which it leaves Seonghwa's mouth and proverbially slaps you right across the face something you never could have expected — paired with the fact that yes, it was something you had considered...

But coming from someone with completely fresh insight on the situation—

Perhaps you hadn't been as safe and accommodating as you could have been, after all.

“I mean,” you stutter out, eyes darting away from his own and back down into the slew of button down shirts before you. “Yeah, we're not exclusive or anything, so...”

Who is it that you're trying to convince, anyways? That everything that you do is okay.

The idea that right and wrong can coexist simultaneously. That someone's right is someone else's wrong, or someone's right and wrong all at once.

Of course you are allowed to do that, and shoulder the consequences of your actions, you shall. Not a punishment, merely a result.

Choose wisely.

“Obviously,” Seonghwa says, pulling back to stand straight again. “But if he has feelings for you and you know that, and he knows that you know that, and yet he knows you're fuckin' other people still...I mean, I can only speak for myself I guess, but I would not be jumping to bare my soul to someone who's probably got a date to get her back blown out twenty minutes after, ya know?”

It's funny in delivery. The truth behind it making you wince all the same.

“You told him?” Seonghwa asks, shortly after amending the question. “That you have feelings for him? Want to be with him?”

You nod silently, carding through a rack of shirts that you've long since stopped paying attention to.

“Then I maintain my stance that he's gotta get a grip,” he says with a shrug, finally settling on an item and holding it up with confirmation. You smile gently at him.

“You threw yourself into the fire, he's gotta meet you there eventually.”

Stepping into the apartment and gently shutting the door behind you as you kick your shoes off, you hear the sound of Seonghwa casually tossing his keys onto the kitchen counter only a few feet away as he steps further ahead, bags set down behind the couch on the opposite end.

You stop and take it in for a moment — another new place, new sights, new smells, a new man.

And sure, Seonghwa wasn't new. Not in the typical sense of the word. He wasn't a random guy that you had just picked up that evening with every intention of drowning your worries in anything that he was willing to give you to help you forget, if even for a moment, but he wasn't...well...

He wasn't comfort. He wasn't home.

He wasn't Hongjoong.

Checking the screen of your phone again for notifications — notifications that you know have not arrived, for if they had, you would have felt them, you attempt to swallow down the knot in your throat. The feeling of being forgotten, of potentially being moved on from.

Did he even care anymore? Was it too little, too late, before you had even known it?

Vaguely, you can hear Seonghwa's deep voice ring out towards you, but the words fail to make their way to you. Not in any real, meaningful way — instead, past words spit like venom once again swim around and consume your memories, making their bed in your mind like a disease you may never find yourself rid of.

‘After all, you didn't know I was going to be there that night.’

“Hey,” you hear, Seonghwa finally breaking through the heavy thought clouding your mind. “What is going on up there?”

Lightly tapping the top of your head with his index finger, you lightly swat his hand away, awkwardly laughing and trying to shake off the way the memory makes you feel even now — the same way it felt then. As if no time had passed between at all.

“I'm fine.”

“Thinking about him?” Seonghwa chimes, teasingly mocking you like you're a girl with a crush.

It's not wrong, but hurts far more than he seems to be aware of, even in spite of the conversation earlier. You're unsurprised by this, as he never had come off as one quick on the emotional uptake of others.

A little self-centered, and a lot into himself. Med student, model — you figure it just sort of comes with the territory, perhaps, and truly — you had known him not to be the one to confide one's deepest, most vulnerable thoughts and feelings in, for those hands however skilled they may be, know not what to do with such items.

Opting to ignore the comment for as long as you can, instead eyes trailing along the medical books, papers, diagrams strewn about on the coffee table in front of the couch...only a few feet away from a few rather expensive looking garments carefully laid out across the top of a lounge chair — you find it charming, in some bizarre way — the juxtaposition of Seonghwa's lives carefully balanced on a thread via a man with no time to spare, and seemingly little knowledge about anything else.

You wonder if there's anything there, really, beyond medicine and beauty. Albeit, the path of medicine such a selfless act in and of itself, almost jarring in comparison to knowing the man; barely able to carry on a serious conversation, or offer a consoling word.

And hilariously, through all of the split second introspection, you come to the ultimate conclusion that you're not even all that sure you even like him that much.

“No,” you eventually answer, shuffling the thoughts from your head with finality. “Thinking about what we should eat.”

“What are you in the mood for?” he hurriedly responds, jumping up and into one of the stools next to the counter, phone in hand. “I'll order whatever.”

“Kind of want a pizza, actually.”

“Done.”

You find this to be the easiest conversation that you've ever had with the man, relief washing over you a bit and, for once, not feeling an undercurrent of battle with every word that is exchanged between the two of you, but you remember after all — you're there for a reason.

“By the way,” you say suddenly. “Need a tape measure, do you have one?”

“Ummmm, yeah, should be in my bedroom. The big white dresser? Not sure which drawer. You can go in there though, don't worry, won't find anything crazy.”

The words aren't all that comforting, you find, in spite of the fact that he's quite evidently trying to be. The promise of not finding whatever insanity the man may have hidden somewhere in the apartment something that you are thankful for, but as you step into his bedroom, the looming feeling of alarm washes over you just as quickly — that previously mentioned undercurrent of battle, now replaced with uncertainty. Not worry, so much, but with the crashing acknowledgement that perhaps you don't really know this man at all.

And you know that it's really none of your business. Not even a little bit, but he had you go in there, and knew what you would find—

—It seems only fair.

“Uh, Seonghwa?”

Long eyes looking up from his phone and straight towards you, dark hair dangling at one side of his face, it takes a long moment for the realization to hit him — so used to his version of normal, that you realize then and there, he had not actually thought about what it was he had been sending you off and into upon informing you where to find the tape measure.

That he obviously should have gotten off of his ass and retrieved himself.

“Oh, oh God,” he groans, eyes darting side to side and most importantly, far away from your own. His discomfort adds to your comfort instead, finding pleasure in the way that he is for once the one in the compromised situation between the two of you.

He was always awkward, but this was way better.

“Okay, ummm, I guess—“ he pauses, eyes screwing shut as if immediately trying to disappear himself from his own apartment, only opening them again upon accepting his failure in doing so and with lips forming a straight line, Seonghwa exhales heavily from his nostrils.

“—It's kinda...what it looks like.”

“The camera,” you plainly state, thumb over your shoulder and pointing back from where you had come from. “Want to tell me about that?”

Sighing, Seonghwa simply slumps forward with his head buried in crossed arms on the counter in front of him, words muffled. “No, but I guess I'm going to.”

“I mean, I won't say anything,” you comfort, shrugging and setting yourself down on the couch behind him. “I'm just already in here so if you're going to like, murder me for the dark web or something then I'd like to know ahead of time.”

You hear Seonghwa chuckle in response, probably thankful for the lighthearted banter in response to your findings. “Okay well, if that's what it looks like then it's not that.”

“What are you, a camboy or something?”

The chuckle in your voice as the words exit your mouth are evidence enough of the fact that you're still trying to make banter of the situation.

Seonghwa's silence in reaction, however, tells you that you're right on the money with your guess.

“Oh my God,” you chime out, a bit louder than you had anticipated. “You are.”

“Can you keep your voice down,” he hurriedly replies, pulling himself up and around to face you with the utmost urgency across his features. “These walls are paper thin, God.”

“Sorry, just—“ you pause, still taken aback by the discovery. “I was joking, I didn't think you really were. Not that there's anything wrong with that.”

With a heavy inhale, and equally heavy exhale, Seonghwa groans in anticipation of having to explain himself even further.

“It's good money, and it's fun,” he explains, standing up and heading over towards you on the couch so that the two of you can finish up the reason that you had gone over there to begin with. “The modeling is good but sometimes I don't take jobs because the travel just takes up so much time, it's hard to juggle with being a med student, so camming sort of supplements my income when I don't take jobs.”

Watching Seonghwa's face as he explains — cheeks and ears flushed red and the complete inability to make eye contact with you as he talks about it, laughing through it awkwardly even though nothing humorous is being said — you hate to admit the way that you find it charming, that perhaps in all of the ways that he is unattractive to you, there's still this. Goofy, uncomfortable, incredibly regular, like a little kid entirely too big physically and especially in life to handle all of the things being thrown his way.

An incredible juggling act, perhaps shocking that he didn't turn out worse.

So awkward, for a guy that jerks off on camera for who knows how many strangers.

“I think it's kind of cool.”

And for the first time since the conversation topic had been breached, Seonghwa's eyes meet your own, albeit briefly. A silent thankfulness for your understanding, for your willingness to accept him.

“You want to get into it? I'll fuck you on camera, we'll make a killing.”

Ah, right, there he is. Spoken like a truly insufferable prick.

“You wish, moron,” you say, flat in tone and forcing him to spin so that he faces away from you. “Get down on your knees so I can measure you out and get this fit right, and if you don't behave I'll have you out there looking ridiculous on purpose.”

Tape measure in hand, you extend the length enough to cross the width of the man's shoulders, making note of the number and dialing it in on your phone laid just next to you on the couch cushion, Seonghwa's head turns just slightly as if in attempt to look back at you, despite not having the range of motion to do so to any reasonable amount.

“Are my shoulders wide?”

You roll your eyes.

“They're a perfectly normal width, Hwa.”

“Wider than What's-his-face's?”

There's that burn in your chest again, and you can't tell if Seonghwa just doesn't get it or doesn't care, at this point.

Swallowing hard at the question, hoping and praying that your voice doesn't break as you force out a light response to an absolutely painful topic, you manage well enough.

“Yes, he's not a model.”

“He's short? Small?”

At this point, you're glad that Seonghwa can't see you — the way that you chew on the inside of your cheek or lip at the mere mention of Hongjoong, and now especially at this bizarrely competitive way that Seonghwa seems to be...having a go at him, despite not even knowing him, it's unappealing, unattractive, and downright right fucking annoying.

“Yes, he's small,” you answer, this time with far less effort to conceal your irritation at the line of questioning. “What does it matter to you, anyways?”

Shrugging suddenly as you continue on with what you had gone there to do to begin with, he sighs. “Just trying to lighten the mood, surely this guy isn't all that, and especially not if he can't even tell a girl he likes her.”

You kind of wish you could disagree.

Appreciating Seonghwa's mismanaged attempt at making you feel better in some way, you allow yourself to let the anger fall to the wayside a bit. The man just before you clearly only good at so many things — matters of other people's hearts, maybe not so much.

Which you sort of knew already.

Silence finally taking the room as you move to measure the length of his right arm, you're delighted by it. The fact that no words are currently exiting his beautiful mouth. You consider for a moment that perhaps beautiful men are far more often better off not using their words.

Wooyoung sort of springs to mind.

Paradise crashes down pretty quickly, though.

“He got a small dick?”

“Seonghwa.”

Swatting the back of his head gently, the man chuckles at your response. “What!? I find it admirable that you love him despite his flaws if that's the case.”

“You have got to shut up before I walk out of here.”

“Okay, okay, I was just jokin’—“

It's an almost pleasant bit in the evening, interrupted by the sound of a notification coming through on your phone, and as the screen illuminates, you only have to glance at it for a second to recognize the length of text — the name — that comes through on the screen.

You take pause, not only due to the unexpected nature of it, but given your current circumstances and just — everything. The feelings all rushing back to your chest, throat tightening in an instant, heart feeling as though it could beat straight through your rib cage at any given moment, you can only assume that Seonghwa doesn't hear the sound, or thinks nothing of it at first, before taking notice of the way that you freeze behind him, arms stuck in statuesque figure as you stare down at the device next to you with thoughts racing a mile a minute.

“What?” he finally questions, moving to turn more and take in the scene behind him, first looking to you, but following your eyes down to the object as the screen dulls again only seconds later. “Oh, is it him?”

You nod, slowly allowing your arms down and swallowing down a dry throat.

“Just ignore him, come on, we're having fun,” the man with you insists, grabbing you playfully by the arms and flailing them about for you. “He can wait a few hours more, don't let him ruin your night.”

Snapping back to reality, you blink, then turning your attention to Seonghwa — eyes bright and eyebrows down turned as if pleading for you not to ruin his good time, you take control of your arms once again as you reach towards your phone.

“I'm just...surprised, he's texting me—“ you say, inhaling deeply before unlocking the screen. “I can't ignore him.”

“You can, come on, we're having a good night!”

>Hongjoong: hey. i'm sorry. we should talk. I want to talk. about the conversation we had a few days ago. when you have time, obviously.

The message hits you in the chest like a freight train, for so many reasons, but the pointed willingness of the apology quite possibly being the most gutting of all.

Hongjoong, a man never above an apology, so you're unsure why it is that this one in particular hits you in such a special way — that he leads with it, that it feels so strong, so meaningful, so much.

And the acknowledgment of the failed conversation, of course.

Looking up from your phone, you meet the sad, puppy dog eyes of Seonghwa — pouty and evidently beyond bummed at the inevitability of the way the night will end — a child starved of play dates, his one moment cut short just like that.

You flash back to the night that you met Seonghwa, and how sexy you thought he was. The reason that you exchanged numbers with him to begin with. Truthfully? A quick fuck was ideally in the cards.

How unfortunate now that you've gotten to know him.

“Nah, I don't think so!”

Before the words really register to you, Seonghwa has your phone swiped from your hands, pulling it from your reach and back behind him — holding it far and away from your own as you attempt to swiftly grab it back from him but with no avail. Repeatedly calling his name to give it back, the man only laughs as you try to best his long limbs without closing too much of the space between the two of you — something that you would like to avoid.

And that he would not.

Pulling forward and nearly off of the couch entirely with Seonghwa leaned back and away, you attempt to reach behind him for your device, still far out of reach, but it's when the man quickly leans back in again without your ready — lips firm against your own and free hand cupping the side of your face to pull your further into it that you find it so easy to melt into the feeling without so much as a second thought; the warmth, the inviting plush of his mouth with a kiss not rushed, or needy, but passionate and soft.

You meet his motions briefly, before pulling back and away from him entirely.

Hand still gently pressed into the side of your head, fingers lightly curling into the hair that resides there, you take in the way that Seonghwa's features soften so much just in that moment — as if a man now knelt before you that you'd never met before. A new man.

He delicately pulls your face back towards him, and you hate the way you allow him to.

Only centimeters from your lips, Seonghwa whispers into you, voice heavy and laden with obvious desire that, if laid dormant all of this time, you had not noticed it until only now.

“If you're really gonna give the fun up for this guy,” he begins, pressing his lips to your own again and so gently that you almost couldn't even feel it. “Then what's wrong with one last one for the road, huh?”

Another kiss.

You're melting into it far too quickly, so easy for Seonghwa to lull you into this sort of comfort that only minutes prior you never would have thought him capable of — a new side of himself, so sensual and inviting and deeply, you wished you weren't curious about what else there was that he had to offer you.

“—He'll never have to find out.”

Okay, fuck it.

Scooting backwards on the couch a bit further, parting your legs to allow room for him in between them, Seonghwa leans into you even more, mouth heavier against your own, with more intent now. Your eyes dart down, in view of the hand clasping your phone still — the buzz of another notification ringing through your ears, knowing precisely who it is that's attempting to contact you — it takes everything in you to muster up the courage to ignore it, cast it aside.

Cast Hongjoong aside.

Seonghwa stands, carding his fingers through long, black hair as he does so before reaching for his belt buckle and beginning to undo it right in front of your face — your eyes fixated on the obvious tenting in the front of his pants at the promise of a fuck that neither of you should particularly be indulging in, but especially not you.

You can. You're allowed.

“Have you thought about this before?” you ask, curiosity getting the best of you and desperately needing to cut through the silence of only your thoughts.

Seonghwa chuckles, still looking down upon your features as he pulls the leather apart, fingers then moving to the button — it's happening a little faster than you needed right now, but also, perhaps that's exactly what you need.

“Of course, every guy thinks about fucking every attractive, female friend they have — at least a little bit.”

An unfortunate byproduct — everything reminds you of him.

Pressing his jeans down slightly and pulling himself from the black fabric of his briefs, he strokes himself slowly, gently, for your viewing pleasure — only inches from your face, eyes still engrossed and watching you as you watch him.

You wonder if this is how he does it for however many viewers he brings in.

“Don't think about him,” he says, bringing the hand up that still clasps your phone and turning the screen towards your face. “Unlock it, just for a little fun.”

“Are you crazy?” you bite back, leaning away from him altogether, but the man before you still lazily pumping himself only snorts a bit and shrugs before answering you back.

“It's your phone, think of it as a bachelorette gift from me.”

The confidence in his tone, while irritating, is intriguing — you wonder briefly who and what he's done to make himself believe that video recollection of you sucking him off could be something that you'd watch back later, holed up in the bathroom late at night with nothing or no one better to do and only a fond memory of something that you had no business partaking in to begin with.

Though, come to think of it; when you put it like that, the appeal was certainly beginning to present itself.

You snatch the phone from him and plug in your pass code, handing it back to him just as quickly — as if the faster it's done the less either of you will have to acknowledge the acceptance, but the grin on Seonghwa's face says everything as he evidently pulls up the camera app and angles your phones lens down and towards your face.

“Lemmie see you work, baby.”

You're certainly not proud of the way the sentence is felt straight between your legs — not entirely sure if it's the words themselves, the man, the camera, or the deviousness of the act as a whole — taking him into your dominant hand and replacing his as he pulls away and instead runs fingertips through the hair at the top of your head, you carry on with the work that he had started on himself. Heavy and warm, long, thick enough but not anything that would take any exceptional prep to work up to, you quickly (and unfortunately) have to settle on the fact that the guilty fuck is doing more for you now, in this moment, than you'd ever really like to admit to yourself.

Pulling yourself forward on the couch more to situate yourself best for taking him, you angle your head down as to run your tongue against the tip of his cock — wet, showy circles across it and looking up to see the effect on him — bottom corner of his lip pulled between his teeth and slightly hooded, brown eyes gazing down upon you.

And the camera, of course. You're making a show of it.

Moving upwards again, you take Seonghwa fuller into your mouth, properly for sucking him off — too big to take the entirety of but you're thankful that he doesn't seem stuck on the necessity of it, hands in your hair and on your head for the sake of being there rather than with intent to guide or pull you onto him, he allows you the ability to take him at your own pace and depth, languidly bobbing along his cock with wet, swollen lips as airy, devilishly sexy groans topple from the beautifully plump ones that had just been kissing you only moments before.

Kisses testing the waters: ‘How horrible are you, really?’

Even with cock in mouth, or especially with cock in mouth, you can't help but have the thoughts spring to mind — how wrong it is, how fucked up it is.

How you're only doing this with promise that Hongjoong will never know, because if he were to, you wouldn't.

But the knowledge of it devastating him not enough to stop you from pulling the trigger on the act, either.

Is this love?

“Feel so good, look so pretty like this,” Seonghwa says, the words nearly startling you from your thoughts despite the act still taking place. “Like a big dick? Hm? Mouth looks so small around me.”

You know he's playing it up for the camera, likely because it's what he's used to doing — talking the viewer through to their finish — he's assuming that someday you will, in all actuality, make yourself come to this little snippet in time at some point in the future.

Depending on how it turns out, you can't really promise that you won't, either.

Picking up your speed along him, hand following suit to make up for the amount of him that you can't fit into your mouth, Seonghwa groans at the extra friction, head falling back briefly to take in the feeling of you swallowing him whole, as best you can.

“God.” And it's nearly a whisper, eyes falling back down to yours once again. “Wanna come all over that pretty face of yours.”

Arousal pooling between your legs much quicker than you'd have ever hoped, the promise of him emptying on your face — while enticing — not exactly the finish you were looking for, but just as you pull off of him slowly to voice the concern, Seonghwa locks your phone screen with an audible click and tosses the device to a plush chair sitting adjacent to the two of you.

“Kinda short but should do the trick if you're hard up for time, here, stand up.”

Somewhat confused but following the man's lead all the same, Seonghwa pulls you up and off the couch before seating himself down where you had just been, cock still hard and all present — you finally come to realize that it was all for show, that he had no intention of finishing then and there.

What a magnificent actor, you think to yourself.

“Take your pants off,” he then instructs, sitting with his back against the couch and hand around himself as he resumes stroking himself at the visual, you wasting no time shimmying out of your clothing for him to watch — lips slightly parted and eyes so strong and intensely situated on your body and all of its movements. Once down to your panties, you look at him again, unsure if meant to strip in totality.

“Should I...?”

“Up to you,” he says, suddenly grabbing towards you and pulling your hips forward and against his face as fingers quickly make their way between your legs and into the sides of the fabric there — but pausing to look up at you again, the dastardly grin is really what sends home the words themselves, thereafter.

“Depends how dirty of a fuck you want it to be, the more clothes the better then.”

And you don't really have time to answer the question, had there ever even been one, before his lips press hard against your pussy and tongue making quick work of the quest for your clit — nearly toppling forward, hands falling to his shoulders for leverage as your knees just about give out from the sudden contact, lewd, slurping and sucking sounds resonating through the apartment as Seonghwa wastes no time tasting you — and just as quickly, the feeling of a single finger slowly pressing into you as you stand before him.

“God, fuck, Seonghwa—“

He hums in acknowledgment of the name, two, three slow pumps of the digit, you feel him add a second. Delicate hands, but by no means dainty — fingers with thickness to them and the feeling of fullness is immediate as he continues the suction on your clit with earnest.

Your own fingers digging into his shirt and the flesh beneath it, head falling back and feeling almost dizzy at the onslaught of sensations, clenching your eyes shut, he pulls his head back from you to look at your features. “Good?”

“Yes,” you whimper out, heavy and barely audible at all. Seonghwa chuckles at the scene before him.

“C'mere.”

And you know he's being annoying when he does it, the words paired with the curl of his fingers deep inside you as he ushers you forward, pressing hard against your g-spot as he does and it's everything you have, all of the strength in your legs to not completely fall forward and against him — but slowly pulling his fingers from you, he instead brings his hands to your waist, steadying you to ease you down and into his lap. Another kiss, this time much heavier and needy and messy from both sides — panties slick and wet and pulled apart messily, allowing you to feel the faint press of his bare shaft against you as the two of you pant and bite at each other's mouths, you want him, and you want him bad.

The coming to a head of so many different thoughts and feelings all at once: the longing, the missing, the sadness, the desire. The allure of being in places and arms where you shouldn't dare be, all the while wishing you were in the ones that you should.

It was good, he made me come, I prefer you.

I prefer you.

You want Seonghwa to fuck you raw.

And you know that the strongest factor in favor of it is the fact that it would be so easy. That the both of you are already right there, so simple, and you shouldn't, and all the while knowing it's sort of why you want to.

Maybe somehow you can undo all of the work that Hongjoong's done if only you allow someone else to do it all over again.

“Seonghwa,” you whisper against his mouth, hips pressing forward and against him, swallowing up the hiss that escapes his lips as a result of it and loving every second of it.

“Condom.”

Nodding, the man reaches down and into his pants’ pocket — still conveniently wrapped around his thighs and pulls for his wallet, metallic package quickly found and ripping it open with his teeth, he nods for you to pull back a little off of him to grant him room to roll it on — watching intently as he does. Settling back comfortably, large hands finding their way up and around your waist again to lift you gently, to hover over him before your descent down — the two of you make eye contact only briefly as one of his hands edges down and between your legs to pull the side of your panties away just as before.

‘Depends how dirty of a fuck you want it to be.’

You quickly dart your eyes away from him, opting to close them instead as you sink down along his length — faster than you might normally and barely allowing yourself any time to adjust, you wince at the stretch, the length, the pull of him against your insides — not completely ready to take him yet.

But ready to get it over with, get out of there, and carry on like this never happened.

Rocking your hips against him, you start out at a relatively quick pace, one hand on his shoulder and the other between your legs to rub you into your orgasm as fast as possible, not even wanting to leave it up to him to get you there — screwing your eyes shut tighter, allowing yourself to feel the way he pulls you down to take his cock; a little hard, a little rough — but it's kind of what you want, what you need, given the circumstances.

In some ways, Seonghwa may as well not be there at all.

“H—harder—“ you whisper, desperately trying to get the friction you need from him out of the position but being starkly limited in availability, you only hear Seonghwa laugh at first, in response to your demand, before stopping the both of you altogether and nearly pushing you off of him.

Your first thought, is that he's pissed. You're not sure why, or what happened, and before being able to get the question out of your mouth, you find yourself face first into the couch cushion and lengthwise on the couch, with Seonghwa already pressing back into you from behind.

Moaning out at the new, different kind of intrusion, Seonghwa leans forward and over your back, hand nestled in your hair before tightening only enough to get your attention.

You said 'harder,' not 'rougher,' — 'rougher' was the next command on the agenda, though.

With a hard, sudden snap of his hips into you, you whine out loudly in response. Then another, and another following — crying out at the feeling, just teetering on the edge of being too much, too painful, you finally hear the words from behind you through gritted teeth.

“I'm fine with being your guilty little fuck,” he says, still snapping his hips harshly between every few words. “Use me to forget him? I can do that.”

Hand still pressed against your head, Seonghwa adjusts his positioning behind you just enough that it gives him better, easier access to continue his relentless drives into you — hard and fast — your hand once again buried between your legs and now orgasm much faster in its approach, you whine out with every full thrust of himself, nearly pulling all of the way from you before plunging back in.

“Feel good? You like that?” he asks, breath heavy and husky and sounding almost bitter in the exchange.

It almost turns you on more, knowing that he's angry with you for this, hates you for it.

“Yes.”

“Yeah? My cock feel good to you, baby?”

So vulgar and with a tone so hateful, you know he's trying to make a point. The reminder that it's him and not Hongjoong. Making you pay attention to it. Not letting you disassociate from the fact. Forcing you to be present and in the moment no matter how much you don't want to be — not entirely, at least.

“Say it,” he adds with a particularly harsh thrust, and you give in right away. “Yes, yes, fuck, Seonghwa—“

“That's right, good girl. Close? Wanna come around my cock for me?”

A moan first ripping through your lips, fingers desperately attempting to grip into unrelenting cushions, you feel Seonghwa's own curl harder into the skin of your hips with every second that you don't answer him.

“Yes, I do, fuck, please I'm close—“

Continuing into you, he quiets long enough to focus on getting you there; fucking into you hard and fast and all of the way through it as you cry out at the way your orgasm finally takes you, you barely even notice as Seonghwa suddenly exits from you, pulling the condom free of himself and stroking himself through his own orgasm — translucent white strings of his cum painting your already stained panties and backside.

A fitting end — filthy and used and an amalgamation of things that never quite should have taken place to begin with.

Slowly, tiredly flipping back over to face him, Seonghwa avoids eye contact at first — the easy excuse of needing to toss the condom away in a rush able to pull him from the situation long enough to steady himself and his feelings before coming back — pants now pulled back up and into place before sitting down on the couch next to you again, eyes away from you as you awkwardly reach for the garments you had left on the floor onto ten or so minutes prior to now.

And then, your phone.

Buzzing lightly against the plush of the chair, you can't help but allow your attention to draw to Seonghwa in light of it all — but the man turns his head from you gently, instead opting to reach for the device as the one closest to it and handing it to you without ever making eye contact.

Talk about guilty fuck.

And of course it's Hongjoong. It's always Hongjoong. The vibrancy of the name on the screen in juxtaposition to the scenario that you just took part in and the way Seonghwa isn't helping in making it feel okay, feels like a knife to the chest.

Maybe, just maybe, it's not okay. Maybe it hasn't been for a while.

“I need to get—“ you quietly clamor out, your existence feeling like a disturbance in the man's home, but unable to leave until you wash the remainder of him off of you. Seonghwa turns his head to you briefly, finally realizing the situation and quickly — awkwardly, pointing you into the direction of his bathroom.

And it's unfortunate the ways that hurt people sometimes expel that pain. For Hongjoong, it's a spitfire tongue and thoughtless words — precisely as he thinks and feels in the moment but with every intention to hurt the recipient just as much as he, himself hurts.

For Yunho, it's repetition — the starry-eyed hope that if given the ability to go back in time, do the same thing over again, maybe do something differently, that he can forge a different outcome of the same situation.

For you, it's actions — thoughtless and selfish and entirely self-absorbed. Desperate for the acknowledgment that the choices one makes along the way are good and right, objectively so, even if at the expense of the ones we love around us.

And for Seonghwa, it's revenge.

Coming back from the bathroom, as best cleaned up as you can manage, you find Seonghwa standing in the kitchen — arms crossed with a glass of unknown liquid in hand as his eyes coldly fall over your figure. A far cry from the man you had arrived there with, but knowing all the same when you had worn out your welcome — you certainly don't feel bad about being kicked out after the sex, truthfully, you couldn't get out of there faster if you had tried to.

“I'm gonna get out of he—“

The sound of your phone vibrating stealing your attention away, but not because of a message notification.

Rather, a phone call.

Phone on the glass coffee table, face up, and not where you had left it when you went off to the bathroom — glancing down at the phone call as the tail end of it comes through, only to find it add itself to a slew of three other missed call notifications.

And all from Hongjoong.

You slowly look back up and towards Seonghwa, still silently perched in the kitchen — watching you, but with nothing to say. Slowly, he brings his hand from the side of his arm to take a sip of the beverage...

But not before ever so gently tipping it towards you.

Cheers, indeed. And 'fuck you, too.'

Panic setting in immediately, before you even have a chance to call Hongjoong back, another call rings through, and gathering your things, shuffling towards the door with little else on your mind beyond getting the fuck out of that apartment and away from that man, you pick up the call finally.

“Hongjoong, I— hold on, just—“

You haven't even heard a word from him yet, pulling the phone back down from your face to swipe through your apps at lightning quick speed, desperate to locate your texting app but not all that ready to lay eyes on precisely what it is that you expect to find.

And you do, of course.

The last thing in your messaging conversation with Hongjoong, the video Seonghwa took of you with him less than an hour earlier.

Not even bothering to acknowledge Seonghwa further as you leave the apartment, barreling down the staircase as quickly as possible with your bag slung over your shoulder, you're finally able to situate yourself enough to bring the phone back to your face.

Inhaling deeply, pausing from exhaustion and pressing your back against one of the concrete walls, you huff out his name. “Hongjoong—“

“What the fuck is wrong with you?”

But the tone on the other line isn't angry, not in the way that you had anticipated. It's not a man furious, violent, aggressive in any sense of the imagination — but rather, a tone dripping with desperation, with tragedy, with pain. This question posed, to avoid the other, obvious question that lied bare and rubbed raw behind it: Why would you do this to me? Why would you hurt me like this?

“Look, I didn't send—“ you pause the line of thought, realizing that the details of who or why it was sent to him mean little, and truly the only thing that matters is why were you with him.

And why does Hongjoong mean that little to you.

“Hongjoong, I'm sorry, it was a mistake, I fucked up—“

“I've been texting you all night, is that why I couldn't get a hold of you?”

“Look, please, we should talk—“

“We should talk? I've been trying to get a hold of you all night to talk!”

“I know,” voice breaking with the words, the burning creeping up quickly and pulling yourself together again enough to continue down the stairs and out of the building and in a ride share towards Hongjoong's place, you continue to plead with him. “Please, Joong, I'm coming over. Please, let's talk about this.”

‘About this.’ The concept of ‘this.’

The unmatched, unswallowable feeling of impending nothingness. The loss of something — someone so great.

Everyone has a breaking point.

When silence greets you on the other line for far too long as your car carries you towards his home, a home that the two of you not too long ago once shared, you can almost hear the way that Hongjoong has to swallow down his feelings, the gut-wrenching twist of the dagger that you so ceremoniously planted directly into his chest.

“I don't know why you're tormenting me,” he whispers through broken voice, otherwise calm words falling onto your ears like death itself.

“So fucking jealous when I slept with your friend, before we even started getting involved—“

“I know, Hongjoong, I know please—“

His voice turning whiny, more broken and pointed. “—It was fucked up then, and it's so fucked up now.”

Throat burning, ears on fire, you know it's on the tip of his tongue if he can muster up the courage to do it, to say the words, to do the deed himself.

I don't love you anymore, goodbye.

But he doesn't, and in an effort to cut him off before he can, you make the quick decision that it's enough with the bullshit, and enough with the games. Emotions have been worn and dragged through the mud enough up until this point for the both of you — and for no reason at all. You know what you want, and you've always known what you wanted.

Him.

“You can come to the apartment to get your shit but I won't be there—“

“Hongjoong—“

He silences, you await the inquiry that apparently won't ever come, and it gives you pause again. Veins running ice cold and breath thin, you figure now more than ever before;

It's now or never.

“I love you.”

♡ send me your thoughts and feelings in my ask.

⎯ ୨previous୧ ⎯ ○ ⎯ ୨next୧ ⎯    

[brightgoat]

Random 3AM Discord revelations

1. If Hot Pants is Hot Pants because HP are her initials what's stopping us from thinking that means her name is Henrietta Pucci

2. Part of a larger more chaotic thing that I'm not gonna get into but. Referencing the first part. What would happen if HP and Pucci switched places? How much different would their respective parts be?

I have heard the first headcanon before, I don't know if the name thing is for sure but I do think her premise and backstory and the fact she as a nun teams up with Diego is absolutely a reference to Pucci, at least like a little nod and wink.

If they swapped places.... well they'd still have brother issues for sure, don't know if HP is the hard predeterministic type enough to go for the heaven plan...

I can see Pucci in HP's pants easier than vice versa, him wanting the holy corpse for redemption and such and such

[stoned-froggy]

i’ve thrown up three times since 3am i think my body is rejecting literally everything i put in it

i’m in a financial spot where i’m gonna have to lean on my stupid dad for money yet again, but even if i do i’m gonna lose my insurance so there’s no winning

i’m gonna miss out on a lot but you know what? if there’s a Great Beyond and i get there and wish i was still here then that’s my problem LOL at this point i don’t know if anything’s worth what’s about to happen in the next two weeks if i don’t go to my dad

and frankly i am not going to stoop down to him so fuck that

take that option off the table and i’m left with literally everything getting cut off. insurance, phone, wifi power gas everythingggggggg.

and i know i’ll get paid in a few weeks. a couple hundred bucks, probably. enough to restart a few things — gas and electric, and maybe wifi if i’m lucky. but not my phone, not yet. not my insurance. not my homeowners insurance, either. for a house that probably has black mold, and that has an unsealed basement that fucking floods, and that has a borderline ant infestation. lmao.

the universe has decided to test me. and i am choosing to fail :)

i don’t get why i had the guts in march and not now

hell, why i had the guts two weeks ago but not now

i played Life for a week or so and have made the executive decision that i’m not built for it

i love my friends more than anything but they’ll make new friends and share their light with people far more deserving of it than i am

besides, it’s just going to keep being this back-and-forth, if the last decade of my life is any indication. and why would i want to keep putting them through that?

if u love me let me go type beat ykwim

i’m trying so hard to slowly pull away, you don’t understand, i’m taking longer to reply and not sending the first message usually or initiating facetimes or whatever but god

why did i not just do it right in march?

why did i answer the phone? why did i agree to call the cops?

why why why why why.

maybe i didn’t really have the guts back then either because i basically told on myself by agreeing to call 911 myself. maybe im just a fucking pussy. maybe i just don’t have the courage to do the one thing i think would be right for me. the thing i NEED.

i can’t starve myself right. i can’t kill myself right. i can’t do shit.

i’m so borderline angry that i have moments where i want to stick around because oh my god, i am so tired of the back and forth bullshit too. like i’m sure it sucks to be dragged into but imagine that being UR BRAIN

the sun is coming up. i took an edible.

i wish i was dead.

[chromatic-lamina]

true history: true mystery, chapter 1085 spoilers

OH MY GAWD,

What a chapter. And cos he's my boy, told you we didn't have to worry too much about one

Trafalgar

D.

Water Law!

I'm so excited (I feel like I should go out and order the whole set of steak knives).

Anyhoo! I remember when I enjoyed reading the scans on my Friday, and they now come out very early my Thursday morning (like, super early. It's just shy of 3am). BUT this was a treat. And the reason I mostly read them is to prevent being spoiled, but also because they include really interesting translator's notes, etc. such as the ones below about Imu:

Which is difficult to see, but basically it says that Imu refers to themself as Mu and then says that Mu can refer to the void century but also to dreams. Super interesting. And so, Lili was not, unfortunately Imu (but that's okay, cos' I love this story line too), BUT she was a...

D!!!

As shown above, where King Cobra realises...

...that he won't survive his encounter with Imu (who was apparently one of the original 20), and Cobra reveals that Lili was Queen Nefertari D. Lili. GOOD STUFF. Sabo overhears. Imu has some problems with this, because, as stated by Cora

and reiterated by (without knowledge to the best of our understanding) Imu

the "D" is the moniker of the Celestials ancient enemy.

And, although sketchy, look at the perspective from that panel above! Imu is miles above them all. Another aside, while looking up Cora and Doflamingo stuff, there's also the 'heavenly' perspective on this frame with Cora and Law, but I also know Oda is fond of this type of editing/story telling:

Back to 1085: Cobra's recollection that Imu was the name of one of the original 20 does tie into the probable theory that Imu had the eternal youth operation centuries prior.

Anyhoo, this is well out of order (my posting of frames) as always! Sorry. It's not only the D's that Imu and their clan need to be scared of, but also

the scholars. Be still my LawBin shipping (platonic or romantic) heart! But, I digress. So Lili is the one responsible for the preservation and also dispersal of

the poneglyphs. Whole page there. So much information! Cobra has not revealed that Lili was a "D" at this point, or that he himself is, so he was playing with fire coming in to see the Elders, but I guess the whole lineage had known about that for a long time then (that they had the initial for some reason) and had survived. It also seems that maybe King Cobra did know more about the poneglyph in Alabasta than previously assumed. Perhaps?

Anyway, Imu above says that Lili's dispersal of the poneglyphs around the world was perhaps a deliberate action (apparently it had been passed off as a mistake, a blunder) as part of a larger plan. And with the reveal of her being a possessor of the Will of D. it seems it probably was, even if she was a catalyst, as so many D's seem to be, without having full awareness or knowledge of what ultimate role they're playing.

Full page again, cos it's so good. So Imu questions Cobra as to why they never divulged Lili's full name, only referring to her by her royal title, which is actually pretty standard practice. BUT, Imu obviously has very strong convictions that Lili is one of those rabble rousers who get this his entity-self really hot under the collar too!

And the Gorosei basically saying: You can't expose that we're some kind of oligarchy/dictatorship/absolute malignant monarchy when it's supposed to be some kind form of supposed League of Nations acting for all countries and supposed world peace. Interesting mix of Imperialism and colonialism these guys have going on. Anyway! The revery is still going on, and is now absolutely proven to be a farce:

Although King Neptune, and who's the other dude? Can't remember. Not Dalton, is it? (please let me know) King Riku Doldo are looking very skeptical at the Uncle Sam dude. (Thank you @robinchan-hananomi !)

Walpol becomes relevant in a way that it seems that Caribou will be too, and Vivi has been kidnapped by the CIA CP0 (or are they CP9)?

Walpol overhears and sees not only Imu's decimation of Cobra with figures that look a lot like Kanjurou's Kazenbo flame spirit from Wano (did the Gorosei shape-shift too, or was it all Imu sending out some kind of malevolent spirit?), but I think he also overhears Cobra's revelation to Sabo that has a nice SFX bubble over it to just tease we readers enough with hints of information about how the Poneglyphs must be protected, and will seemingly will help usher in the dawn! Ooh, so excited.

BTW. What or who is the figure behind Cobra in the bottom right panel? Sabo?

Walpol outs himself as having seen everything, so shocking is it to him:

and so the spectres are on his tail (and I think it's quite funny that first Imu doesn't know or sense Sabo, and other defenses are breached by Walpol, of all people!). SO, he's one of my least favourite villains, along with Caribou and Spandam, but I'm guessing there's something with their devil fruits that make them crucial to the plot, as well as being kind of incidental characters witnessing key points of One Piece lore.

I doubt he has any great love for Vivi, but he also probably knows where his best chance for survival lies, so, it seems he's been creeping around the castle and I'm going to align CPO with Get Smart now, cos they've got that kinda vibe. Not goofy enough to be Scooby Doo (although Jabra does a good job), but still funny and sexy enough to be the characters of Get Smart who weren't Max. (look it up if you don't know).

Anyhoo! Vivi got kidnapped, and I'm guessing it was at the urging of the gorosei who did it at the urging of Imu, or maybe if Cobra didn't spill the beans, they would've used her as a bargaining chip. Anyway, Kalifa here:

stating that Vivi will end up being a pet (?!?). Did Charloss want her? And I'm wondering if Jabra's wording is a mistranslation, although maybe not. As far as I'm aware, the expression is "play your cards closer to your chest", but maybe it's changed over time. Or there's a pun I'm not getting.

Vivi's reaction in the following frame is awesome (gonna put the whole page in again, cos it's got so much info):

First, awesome that Shirahoshi got away, and we saw that way back when with Garp accompanying the family back to Fishmen Island. Cool info dump from Jabra above. (Very chatty secret agents. Maybe that's why they don't get to wear masks). But I especially like Vivi's incredulity at Kalifa's comment, and her commitment to doing something about it. She's got a devil fruit, doesn't she? Yes! BUT

Trashing young prince to the rescue! (okay, he's a king, once disposed, newly reinstated somewhere) (but he is young. This guy's in his 20s, I think). Vivi hitches a ride with the dumpster on wheels. And from there, Big News Morgans picks them up! (not yet witnessed). Here from chapter 1074:

She's really gone up in my estimation. I never noticed how much she speaks her mind and sticks up for others before (I'm slow, don't worry). And it's not just cos she's a D. Haha. That's not an automatic "like" card, but I might be a little predisposed.

Speaking of which, this part with the ASL brothers was hilarious:

"Do want a "D" in your name, Sabo?"

"You can be Sad. Bo!"

"Why'd you put it there!?!"

Ah, lol, bless.

Also, Imu has the same kind of imperiousness as Doflamingo. Doflamingo's rougher in speech, and I'm guessing with the "thou" and so on shown in the scanlation on the first page that Imu is formal, but as entitled and condescending as fuck, just like our pink feathered friend.

One thing (or many) so interesting about Doffy, though, is:

from chapter 727, is that he's a man very sore about losing his Celestial dragon status, who wants to destroy them and the world government, and who is not afraid of the CD's. Also, it seems that he's well aware of Imu (Mary Geoise's greatest treasure?). I wonder how he was going to challenge Imu if Law had granted him eternal life. If that was his aim. So, a digression, but I think our pink bird will again be relevant soon! Fingers crossed, and I really don't want them to redeem him. Please.

Lastly, the cover was very cute:

Franky directing newly hatched turtles to the ocean, and it's true, so many head in the wrong direction, and such a small proportion actually survive, so he's a hero. Is he sitting on a turtle-hatchling eating crab?

Dunno if any of this was coherent, and I'm sure I missed a bunch, but over and out for now (ah, back to bed!).