#i just really like the idea of gears and ice being really close coworkers but went their separate ways and never really talked again

[atinyladybug-art]

I have a comic idea because i was looking at an Iceberg sketch and like

my headcanon was that Iceberg's scarf was given by Gears before Gears was promoted into O5. And its like this conversation between Ice and Gears where Gears is like giving Iceberg a parting gift for working together for years.

and its a red scarf and Ice is like "why red? it's not exactly my favourite colour nor does it fit me with my teal hair yknow"

and then Gears is like "You mentioned you miss what warmth and fire feels like so I thought a scarf being red might give you that sense anytime you wear it." and "its so i can see you in the crowd from afar"

and it makes me happy.

[sorryjustafangirl]

mascot mysteries

a/n: me posting something that isn’t at like midnight? wow. anyway i thought this was a super cute idea so i hope you all enjoy it :)  this is also a gender neutral reader! and this is a covid-free AU

Pairing: Nolan Patrick x reader

Word Count: 1.8k

warnings: a few couple words, a little bit of anxious movements, Gritty (if that needs to be a warning)

disclaimer: this is a work of fiction and real person fiction if you don’t like that, please don’t read! also the gif isn’t mine! all credit to the incredible gif-maker!

tagging: @barzypatty​

You walked into the Wells Fargo Center, admiring the arena. This was your dream job ever since college. Honestly you couldn’t believe you got it. You pull out your phone with the emailed instructions of where to go. You look for the “hallway next to the washroom” only to discover there are three different hallways that have signs directing to the washrooms. 

Well fuck. 

“Are you good there?” You look to your left to see two guys, likely players based on their attire. One was taller, with longer hair and a small smile. The other one was shorter but looked more rambunctious. It looked like there were in a little bit of a rush, but you were really lost. 

“I’m actually kind of lost. I’m looking for conference room B8? But the instructions I have are really vague, so I have, like, no idea where I’m going,” you admitted, folding into yourself a little bit.

“That’s on our way! Come with us, we’ll show you where it is,” the shorter one said, motioning you over to where the two of them had stopped. “So, you’ve never been here?”

“It’s actually my first day on the job, so, um no. I haven’t been here before either, I, uh, grew up in Canada,” You cursed yourself. This was your first impression with the organization and you couldn’t even make a conversation without the stammering.

“Cool! Me and Patty are from Canada too! Shit, sorry, I’m TK and that’s Patty,” He said, motioning to the taller guy beside him. “And don’t worry about getting lost, Pats here got lost on his first day too,”

“Good to know I’m not the only one whose bad with directions,” you directed your comment to Patty, making brief eye contact with him. A rosy blush brushed his cheeks and you caught a mumbled “yeah”

“What do you do….?” Patty prompted, his voice quiet, but somehow you still heard it. He couldn’t deny you were pretty. 

“Oh, sorry, I’m Y/N. And I’m in media? I don’t know my exact title, but working for one of the best marketed media teams was too good for me to, uh, turn down so…” You said, slightly talking in front of TK so you could answer Patty’s question.

“Oh cool! Maybe you’ll get to meet Gritty, he’s the fun residence troublemaker,” Travis popped in.

“I thought that was your job Teeks,” which earned a jab from TK into Patty, who just snickered. 

“Travis, bud!” The three of you stopped to see someone else motioning for TK, who jogged over to the other man. 

“C’mon, the conference room isn’t too much further, I’ll walk you there,” Patty said, already making some steps forward. After a small comfortable silence, he stopped in front of two double doors. “So, uh, this is it. Good luck on your first day,” 

“Oh! Thanks. And, um, thanks for showing me where it was,” You tugged down on your jacket. “I guess I’ll just….” you motioned behind you to the doors.

“Oh right, yeah, I’ll, uh, let you go,” You gave a small wave and turned towards the conference doors and he turned back to go where he came from, only to turn around after a few steps. “Hey Y/N?”

“Yeah?” You took a few steps back towards him.

“You’re in media, yeah? So you might be at games or maybe even practices?” He scratched the back of his neck, slightly mumbling towards the end.

“Uh, yeah maybe. I’m not too sure where they’ll put me just yet but I like being in the action. I know that might seem weird ‘cause I’m sorta shy and quiet but..” You wrung your hands together. 

“No, no, I get it. It’s like being a different person, when you’re behind the camera or something. You get to be someone else and it’s nice. I get like that on the ice sometimes. I can make the big hits and stuff and no one treats it like it’s different from being quiet outside the game,”

“Yeah, like a different person. That’s exactly it,” You met his eyes again. Holy shit, why is he so gorgeous?

“Y/N Y/L/N?” A head popped out from behind the conference room doors. “We’re ready for you,” 

“Great, thank you,” You turned back to Patty. “That’s, uh, that’s me, but I’ll hopefully see you around, Patty?” 

“I’d like that a lot. And uh, you can call me Nolan,” The blush came back to his cheeks but you could barely notice over the heat in your own cheeks. 

“Bye Nolan.” You gave him one last smile before entering the conference room and closing the door, slowing entering the room. Once you came into sight, the people around the table jumped up. 

“Ah! There they are! Our new Gritty!”

***

After that first encounter, you seemed to bump into Nolan more. Before work, sometimes after work. You would make casual conversation, both mumbling, but you just got each other. And it didn’t take too long for him to muster up the courage to ask you on a date. While you were slightly hesitant, he was quick to assure you that “I may have asked G to ask management if it’d be okay with our jobs and, uh, everything’s fine, so…?” which earned him a kiss on the cheek and a yes. 

The problem was your job. You loved being a mascot. Seriously, you did. You were hooked after that first varsity game you went to in college. The energy of the crowd, interacting with the players and fans, the anonymity. The anonymity was the issue. Behind the costume, no one knew it was shy ol’ you. You could do anything and no one would tell you that you were being too rowdy or obnoxious. No one expected anything out of you except fun. It was perfect. And being Philadelphia’s beloved mascot/political figure was the dream. Telling Nolan risked the anonymity of the job. But to not tell Nolan was becoming an issue. He understood you had to work during game days, but it was becoming increasingly difficult not to see you with the other better halves in the stands, especially since you worked here. There was no reason for you not to be there. Every other teammate of his got to see someone they loved in their jersey but he didn’t. 

When he brings this up, all timid, you are so quick to make a compromise. Before every home game, you’d meet in the tunnel for a good luck handshake. It might seem ridiculous but he got to physically see you before each game and it was a fun, quirky ritual. 

“It’s like a different person right? You get in your zone and I’ll get in mine,” You told him. He responded with a kiss. 

But you were running out of excuses why you were late either before your handshake or after his game, where you would also meet him in the tunnel. You had used the “I caught up with work” at least four times, “I saw a coworker who wanted to talk” a few times, and even resorted to “I got lost” once. You could see it was throwing him off a little. He was still playing perfectly fine, but it didn’t have that same “umph” he sometimes brought to the ice. 

It was the home game against the Penguins when he finally snapped. That’s how you knew it was bad. Gritty was asked to do the fun pre-show, and you hadn’t had time to change to see Nolan before the game. He threw more hits, had more aggression, and more than the normal Pennsylvania rivalry. You couldn’t help but think that part of it was because you didn’t show up before the game. He’d even gotten in a fight with Tanev early in the second period. 

So, during the intermission between the second and third, you asked your team to lead you down to the tunnel and grab Nolan out of the dressing room. The Flyers were up 3-0 so you didn’t think it’s be a huge issue with Coach. 

He quietly exited the room, confused on why he got pulled out. A member of your team just gestured to you in your costume, which did little to clear up his confusion. You held your hand up in a fist for a fist bump, the first move in your handshake. When he still gave that bewildered look, you softly grabbed his gloved hand and pushed it against yours. When you lifted your hand up for a high five, he still needed some prompting. But when the down low high five came, you started to see the gears in his head turning. He gave a small chuckle and slowly worked through your handshake, ending with a pinky promise and a kiss to your respective thumbs. When you’ve finished, he just gives you that small side smile and shakes his head, with a chuckle. 

You can hear the boys getting hyped up in the dressing room, and then the buzzer goes, so you break away from Nolan, but stay in the tunnel. As the boys single-file pass you, you give them each a boop on the head, with some extra love given to Nolan. 

That third period, Nolan seems to have his “umph” back. An assist and a goal, and he celebrated both by glancing up to you, celebrating as per usual with the fans, especially after his goal. 

After the game, you go and have your own shower, all sweaty after the 5-0 Pennsylvania battle. You took your time, knowing you’d have to have a semi-serious conversation with Nolan. But when you join him in the tunnel, he’s all smiles. He wraps you in a hug, spinning you around, before setting you on the ground and nuzzling into your neck. You run your fingers through his own freshly washed hair. The two of you stand there for a bit before he mumbles into your neck, barely audible. 

“Like another person, eh?” You smiled and tucked your head into his chest. 

“Oh shut up, I don’t even know if you’re allowed to know.” A hearty laugh escaped him.

“Secret’s safe with me, babe,” He wrapped an arm around your shoulders and kissed the top of your head as you started to make your way out of the arena. “Fuckin’ Gritty, I can’t believe it. I thought you were ignoring me,”

“I’m sorry, Nols. It’s just a lot to take in. Didn’t want to scare you off,”

“Well, I’m sticking around if that’s alright with you.” You looked up at him, and his cheeks started to redden, and not just from the game.

“Yeah. That’s alright with me,” You leaned into the crook of his shoulder, glad you didn’t have to hide any part of yourself from Nolan anymore. 

Bonus: “Did you ever actually punch a kid?”

“Oh my gosh, I’m not answering that,”

“It’s a valid question babe! I’m not going to stop you, I just wanna know,”

feel free to let me know what you think! thanks for reading

[bestintheparsec]

The Same Coin - Prologue

Javier Peña x F!Reader

Masterlist

Summary: You and Javier Peña are begrudging coworkers—nothing more, nothing less. Two people with a job to do but very different ideas on how to get it done. Much to your dismay, things never go according to plan; not when it comes to Escobar, or anything else.

A/N: Soo I’ve been working on something in secret😌 This tiny idea has been on my mind for months now, and I finally had the time to sit down and think about writing it. This is going to be a short series. I wanted something soft & angsty without getting too deep into the plot of the show—of course, this is me, so my ideas got a little deeper than I planned. But I hope you like it! Special love & thanks to @hiscyarika​, whom I have bugged relentlessly and, though she’ll deny it, I would not have been able to write this without her❤️ Thank you for reading, and as always, feedback is welcome! 

Words: 1.8k

Warnings: canon-typical violence, mentions of blood 

You are not fond of Javier Peña.

It’s not so much dislike, or even distaste, really—but more of a...mutual disagreement on how things ought to be done. Not that either of you claimed to stand on any moral high ground, but you tended to keep things as clean as possible. Peña, meanwhile, had his methods. 

This is all more evident as you listen to the incessant sound of the phone that’s been ringing while he’s clicking away at his typewriter, taking his time before finally picking it up.

“Peña,” he answers, putting out his cigarette. He listens for a second before looking up, giving you a nod as he jots something down.

When he hangs up, he finishes typing before slipping the note into his pocket.

“We've got a lead,” he says hurriedly. He tosses his paperwork aside, opening the drawer for his gun and gesturing for you to do the same.

“Are you going to run it by the ambassador first?” you ask, though you already know the answer. You lean back in your chair with no intention of getting up. He always does things his way, regardless of what anyone tells him. You’ve worked with him long enough—a year? Longer? No one has the energy to keep track of these things. But it’s been long enough for the two of you to know exactly how to grind each other’s gears.

“I'd rather keep this one discreet,” he remarks, raising his brows with an unspoken Just go with it.

You glare up at him, unamused. “Peña, you're already walking on thin ice around here. You want me to put my ass on the line, too?”

He clenches his jaw and impatiently rests his hand on the desk, leaning towards you. He's got frustration in his eyes that probably matches your own. 

“All I'm asking is that you help us get just one bit of useful information to work with,” he whispers. You can hear the annoyance in the stain of his voice. “We're chasing our fucking tails with how they're doing things here—even Escobar knows that. Don't you get tired of following the damn rules all the time?”

“Why can't you get Steve to go with you?,” you counter. You cross your arms and bite the inside of your cheek, trying not to let your own irritation show too much.  “I think he'd be much better company for you,” you shrug.

Unfortunately for Steve—who was more of a friend than coworker to both of you—he could never pick a side. He was fine with it, though, always finding a bit of amusement in letting you two bicker.

“Sorry to disappoint, but they assigned Murphy to go with Trujillo today,” Peña answers impatiently. "You really think I'd ask you if I didn't need to?" He straightens, putting a hand on his waist and leaning to the side in that goddamn arrogant stance he always has.

You let out an irritated sigh, shaking your head but pulling your own drawer open anyways. Stowing the gun behind your back, you stand and follow him out.

“Don't worry. If we get caught you can pin it all on me,” he jeers. You shake your head, knowing he's patronizing you.

You’re met by the usual hot air and humidity as you step outside, walking towards his Jeep. Heat waves radiate off the ground, prompting you to roll up your sleeves and wish you’d dressed lighter today.

“This better be worth it,” you mutter as you hop into the passenger seat and shut the door.

“It’s better than doing all that paperwork and you know it,” he retorts, though his tone is calmer now. He’s always content whenever he convinces you to get in on his schemes.

You decide it’s not worth arguing over anymore and drop the subject. He turns on the AC and slips on his aviators before pulling out of the parking lot.

You’ve been driving for a while, listening to nothing but the sounds of street traffic, when you realize you’re in an area of the city you’re not familiar with. You’ve never seen these buildings before. Even the street signs look different, with names you’ve never heard of.

“Who’s the informant this time?” you ask, breaking the silence. You continue to watch the unfamiliar businesses and buildings pass your window.

“Classified,” he answers curtly, to which you roll your eyes. He keeps his eyes on the road.

“Right. How much can we trust this information?” you reply. 

“We can trust them,” is all he gives you.

You sigh and turn to him. “Look, Peña, I’m glad you have your code for your sources, but if you’re gonna drag me along on this stuff, I’d like to be more informed.”

“And I’m telling you that all we’re doing is staking out this address. Quica and his guys are supposed to be meeting there, and if we can figure out who they’re talking to we may be able to find a link to one of Escobar’s informants.”

Silence falls over both of you again and you look out the window, observing as people go about their lives.

You exhale quietly. Sometimes you ask yourself how you both managed to remain civil with each other. Work is work, and you have the same goal, after all. But it’s surprising just how many eggshells you’ve avoided walking over with him.

“Sometimes you have to do bad things to catch bad people,” he’d said to you once. You can hear the words in your head sometimes. You’re never sure if it’s a reminder or a reassurance.

Peña’s not an asshole, not in the way the CIA thinks he is. But you often wonder how you’d gotten paired up with him despite how differently you work. There’s already so much chaos here; you would prefer not to feed the flames if you had the choice. Peña seems to see the chaos as all the more reason to do everything in his power to put an end to Escobar. He’s got many...sources of information that he’s willing to use. You never ask where he makes these connections, and you don’t know whose methods are better, but you’ve never liked being fire to gasoline. 

When you make it to your destination—a small, quiet neighborhood—he puts the car on idle and points out the alleged location; it's a typical, innocent-looking flat, covered by some shade. Neither of you have anything to add, so it’s quiet again except for the sounds of people on the sidewalks. Some of them are sweeping their front steps or watering their plants, chatting quietly with their neighbors.

You both sit and wait for long enough that you start to question whether anyone was coming in the first place. You unbuckle your seatbelt and take a swig from your water bottle, resting your elbow on the window. You tap your foot on the floor of the car, which draws his attention.

Javier Peña is not fond of you. 

He glances at you for a split second behind his sunglasses. You only look mildly annoyed as you watch your surroundings. You’ve got one hand wrapped around the other, unconsciously massaging your fingers; a nervous tic you have, one he knows of because of how often you’re on these sporadic missions with him. He chuckles quietly without humor, wishing you’d be willing to bend the rules more. Between himself, you, and Murphy, there seems to be this spectrum of gray hues. This, he’s able to accept. But with new management and all eyes on the three of you now, it’s more important than ever for you to be on the same page. Someday you might see eye-to-eye with him. For now, you always do your part and he does his—getting the job done is all that matters, anyways. Whether you need to drown things out with a glass of whiskey or not, isn’t his concern.

Another twenty minutes go by when a car finally pulls up to the flat, and three guys get out. Peña sits up straighter. You stare in disgust when you realize one of them is, in fact, La Quica. You can’t help but feel relieved though; at least the informant was right. You ponder how far this information could move your case forward, watching as the sicarios laugh and walk towards the door of the flat. They smile as though they’ve never watched blood spill by their own hands.

Pendejos, you think when you see how nonchalant they seem to be. 

Until one of them looks towards the Jeep—and meets your eyes. Shit.

The guy turns and says something to the others, nodding in your direction. Did they recognize this car? You bite the inside of your cheek and your pulse picks up a bit. 

“Peña,” you whisper through closed teeth. 

You barely turn your head to look at him, but his eyes are locked on La Quica. You start to suggest driving away, but don’t get the chance to finish. A shot rings out and a bullet shatters the windshield as you both cover yourselves from the flying glass. It misses both of you, but when you turn back towards them, they’re all running. One of them shoots a few more times towards you as he runs.

“Fuck!” Peña hisses, cocking his gun as he opens the car door and runs after them. Not even a second passes before you get out and follow in pursuit, swearing under your breath.

You’re not far behind Peña when you run past the entrance of their meeting spot—a movement catches your eye, and you see another sicario, who takes off in the opposite direction. You turn on your heels and follow alone, firing a few times at him. He’s faster. The Colombian heat beats down on you as you chase him through the streets and narrow alleyways. He shoots at and misses you. You’ve almost caught up to him when he pushes a bystander off their motorcycle, driving away and leaving you in the dust.

“Damn it,” you mutter to yourself, catching your breath. More shots ring out in the background, and you take another deep breath before running back in Peña’s direction.

The streets are cleared of people now, and you have no idea where the other sicarios went. You follow the sound of another gunshot, turning a sharp corner when someone slams, hard, into your body. You let out a grunt and swear again before realizing it’s Peña, who steadies you before hunching over, panting.

“They got away,” you state; it’s not a question. He nods.

You don’t know where you are anymore and tuck your gun away as you look around. “Let’s go find the car—” you start, taking a step forward when he grabs your wrist. 

You turn to him questioningly, and he’s still panting when you notice he’s got his hand over his thigh. Your eyes widen when you see the blood that’s pooling around the hole in his jeans. He’s been shot. And he didn’t even care to immediately point it out, you mentally roll your eyes.

“Fuck, Peña—” you reach out, and he tries to take a step forward.

Before you can stop him, his legs give out and he collapses onto you.

~

Translations: 

Pendejos = assholes

~

Series tags: please let me know if you’d like to be tagged!

Perm tags: @aeryntheofficial​ @i-like-those-odds​ @heyy-honeyy @hail-doodles​ @hiscyarika​ @taman-a​ @electricprincess888​ @spacegayofficial​ @myrin1234​ @aloneontheoutside​ @pascalisthepunkest​ @ah-callie​ @fleurdemiel145​ @katialvi​ @murdermewithbooks​ @pisss-offf-ghostt​ @kayebede​ @lamnothome​ @fan-g0rl​ @lokiaddicted​ @mrsdaamneron​ @poedaneron​ @wolfshifter4life​ @rociomz​ @opheliaelysia​ @dyn-djarin​ @randomness501​ @hayley-the-comet​ @mrsparknuts​ @kyo101​ @blue-tidal-wave​ @palalover​ @immundusspiritu​

[mutenized]

Butterfly (Chapter Three)

Pairing/Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Thor Odinson, Wanda Maximoff, Steve Rogers

Warning(s): none??

Summary: Your powers just came in after a glimpse of the future startled you, is anyone who they say they are?

Word Count: 1079

A/N: This IS a shorter chapter, as I’m still suffering from writers block paired with the fact I’m doubting my writing skills. I’m hoping that with pushing myself to write a bit more helps with the writers block that has been stewing in my mind since, like, November. 

TAG LIST IS OPEN

MASTERLIST

Thor’s thick, accented words filled your head as you paid close attention to the burly man. The cracking of his knuckles and the tense flexion of his muscles under the zip-up sweatshirt he had on seemed to punctuate the true seriousness of the powers you had abruptly developed. The main points of his firey yet lengthy sermon was that, one; The Casket of Ancient Winters was a cherished relic and a weapon to these ice giants that used it during battles, two; that weapon could send any realm or world into a new ice age, three; all of its past owners were now all dead, and you possessed those powers. That it wasn’t ever suspected that such a thing could happen but when Loki had used it, or attempted to, half of the power descended to Earth and connected you to its icy confines which also awoken the powers that sat dormant. Shock bit at the blood that currently pumped through your body, the possibility of being a weapon those in NINE different realms ached over worried you especially since you truly had no idea who to trust now. All that was known was that the Asgardian was not his brother and that he wanted to protect you. He seemed oddly determined to keep you safe, to make sure that you weren’t going to be taken advantage of. Well, maybe he was just concerned for the powers of the Ancient Winters that lay beneath your skin. 

“Do not worry Little Storm, I know there is more than just the powers of the Ancient Winters that lay within you.” Thor’s voice broke the silence that was created, the anxiety in the room thick as your teeth tugged at your nails in a nervous habit. “Tony has a scan for you to take later on with Vision and Doctor Banner, it’s something that seems very, VERY, intimidating when I say it like this but it really isn’t. It’s actually painless minus for the blood sample they’ll have to take. They just want to figure out all of what your powers may hold.” Wanda noted, her hand cupping your shoulder sent a relaxing wave over you before you finally found the courage to speak. “So, my biggest question is why are we on the field? Just for me to get some fresh air?” The obliviousness that rested at your mind was hilarious to the two that stopped besides you, causing you to truly take in the situation. If you had paid an ounce of attention you would have noticed the fact that Thor was wearing relaxed workout gear whilst Wanda adorned something akin to stylish protective gear. “Oh no. No no no. I am NOT fighting the God of Thunder. You just told us the item that is the flame behind the majority of my powers can cause a fucking ICE AGE! I’m NOT going to test any of my powers on either of you.” With a huff, you crossed your arms across your chest while the two chuckled. 

“We are not making you use the frost on us, Little Storm. Red Witch and I want to know the extent of your powers and how controlled they are, or rather, uncontrolled. Now, focus.” Thor’s calloused hands cupped your shoulders, correcting your stance to a sturdy one so you would not lose your footing nor balance if anything was to shoot off. “This is how I used to gain control when I came here,” Wanda guided you with her gaze, instructing you to close your eyes and feel your center, “I would breathe, focus on my surroundings. Rather than focus on the noises of my mind, I focused on the noisy details of true nature.” Her calming voice as well the surprisingly helpful advice truly did help you center yourself. In fact, her notes to take in and listen to the nature helped all too well. The sounds of water molecules dripping into a tiny puddle from a freshly hydrated part of the gardens perked the hairs on the back of your neck. As suddenly as the noise of the water appeared to you, a ball of water formed at your hands in an orb. With eyes snapped open, amazement stilled you three before a smile overcame your face. “Now try to be gentle with it. Feel its energy, its purpose. Do what you need with it.” ---- Watching from the living room windows above, Bucky’s blue eyes trained on you while the orb of water traveled between your hands. To say he was shocked was a simple understatement, his metal fist slack for the first time since you’ve arrived. Seeing the relaxed state you were in as you toyed with the elements of the earth, the reality hit him hard that you’re no longer a mission, not a tagline he has to write down. Rather, now, you were his coworker. You were his equal on the level of bein a high stakes ‘Avenger.’ Suddenly everything shifted, if he were to act as he was already acting around you in front of everyone else, he knew that not only Sam, but Stark and Steve would be up his ass as well. With a groan, he didn’t want to build walls and act like an ass to the one person who wasn’t Steve that he let get so close. “Fuck” was all that tumbled from the long-haired man’s mouth before he jumped back. A ball of water splashed right at the window and in his shock he stumbled back with a shocked yell, scowling down at Wanda, Thor, and you. Yet, the playfully steeled frown with furrowed brows and crossed arms didn’t last long as he saw the joy you exuded. He could just imagine your laugh entwined with the larger man’s and the Sokovian woman’s, lighting up anyone’s day as it filled their ears with joy. “Bucky, you can stop watching over her. She’s safe.” The deep voice of his childhood friend filled Bucky’s presence, causing his spine to oddly snap straight rather than relax, like he was caught in the act of a crime.

“I know, Steve. Just making sure that they’re not goin’ too hard on her.” His Brooklyn accent never seemed to fade even as he was subdued into the soldier, though in reality, the soldier was the tail end of his coin. A side that he doesn’t want anyone to see ever again. Especially not you.

Especially not you.

TAGLIST:

@theprettynerd​

@buckysleftarm420

[atlafan]

Take it Slow  - Part Twenty-Seven

a/n: okay this is my first shot at a harry:y/n fic, and it will be multiple parts. y/n had a bad experience with an ex over a year ago, and finally accepts her coworker and good friend Niall’s invitation to go on a blind date with his friend Harry.

Warnings: Smut.

Masterpost (all previous parts can be found in the masterpost)

Rachel left around 10 the next morning so you could get ready for the day. You were so happy to have alone time with her. You both didn’t get as much one on one time together as you’d like. You decide on wearing your hair up in your classic high pony, especially since your nephew was starting to get grabby. You put on a pair of skinny jeans and a black sweater. You put a pair of booties on, and wait for Harry.

He keys into your apartment around 12:15. He was getting better about being early for things.

“Love?” You hear him and come out of your room. “Hey cutie.”

“Someone’s in a better mood.” You practically jump into his arms, kissing him on the lips.

“Yeah, sorry again for being a meanie.”

“S’okay, we all have our moments. Ready to go?”

“Yup.”

Harry lets you pick the music for the ride.

“Alright, so please, tell me all your good news.”

“Okay, so yesterday afternoon my supervisor called me into her office, and at first I was scared. But she called me in to tell me that because of the work I did on that project last week, our contract has been extended, thus gaining more business. Apparently a lot of good word has gotten back to the CEO about me. Get this. Not only do they want to pay for grad school, like the whole thing, not just half, BUT they want to give me a raise. Like a significant one with a new title and everything! They want to make me an associate director!”

“Are you kidding me?! That’s incredible baby!” His hand squeezes your thigh. He felt terrible for blowing up at you last night. You could’ve celebrated. “We have to celebrate tonight!”

“I’m so excited! And they said I could pretty much pick whatever program I want as long as it’s online. Don’t say anything to Niall though. They’re planning on bumping him up to, but they plan to talk about it Monday. There’s all this restructuring happening. I’ve only been there two years, I can’t believe it.”

“I’m so happy for you, it’s great they’re recognizing your work! And I know how much you already love it there, this is like icing on the cake.”

“I know! She said they didn’t want to risk losing me.”

“That’s amazing, this is so great.” Harry was beaming. He was so proud of you. “What school do you think you’ll apply to?”

“I’m not sure yet. I need to look over the information my supervisor sent me, and then do some research. I need to figure out what I want to become a master.” He chuckles.

“I’m so proud of you, really.”

“Thanks babe.” You put your hand on top of the one he has on your thigh, and you stay like that for the rest of your drive.

//

Harry brought a ton of equipment with him. It was too cold to take photos outside, so he brought this giant white sheet to hang up in your brother’s living room. It went all over the floor as well, creating a nice background. You were holding your nephew while he was setting some of the lights up.

“Thanks again for coming out to do this.” Your sister in law smiles while clearing some toys out of the way.

“Oh, it’s my pleasure. These are my favorite kinds of photoshoots.” Harry smiles back. He looks over at you lovingly while you rock the baby and talk with your brother. “I brought some props with me, was there anything in particular you were hoping to do?”

“Well, as you can see, we’re all wearing the same sweater. I think we’re trying to go with a season’s greetings vibe? Almost like a winter wonderland? I’m not Jewish, so we didn’t want it to be too overbearing with the religious stuff.”

“Right, yeah we can definitely do that. I can show you some samples too of some after effects. I can edit in some snowflakes, or even a snowman behind ya.”

“Did you hear that honey?” She says to your brother who is laughing with you about something.

“Hm? Yeah, that sounds good.”

“So, we’d like some of the three of us, obviously, some of just him and I, some of just him and daddy, and then some of daddy and I.”

“Alright.”

Harry sets up two different cameras, one on a tripod, and the other around his neck. He connects his laptop to it so the pictures will go right in. You didn’t realize his freelance operation was quite so high-tech. Harry unfolds a collapsible bench, and sticks it on the sheet.

“Okay, so if dad wants to sit on the bench, and them mum can sit right in front.” He comes over to you, gesturing to hand the baby over. “Thank you, hey little guy.” He coos to the baby. “And mum if you wanna have him in your lap…that’s perfect.”

Harry uses his handheld camera for a few test shots, and then goes over to the camera on the tripod. You go behind him to watch them pop up on the screen. He had gotten the lighting perfectly. No shadows, no one looked shiny, you were impressed. You made a funny face to your nephew to keep him happy and smiling.

“How ‘bout one where you’re all sittin’ on the floor?” Harry goes behind your brother to move the bench out of the way. “That’s great.” He snaps a few shots. He tries to get a few candid ones in.

“Do you have a chair or basket you wanted to put him in for his solo shots?”

“Yeah! Let me go grab it.” Your sister in law pulls over a little chair to rest the baby in.

Harry gets in close to get some different angles. Your nephew is mesmerized by the camera, so the pictures come out really good. You loved seeing Harry do his job.

“Mum and the baby next?”

Your sister in law picks the baby up, and gently rocks him. Harry gets a few shots from the still camera, and then goes over to the two of them.

“Let’s get his face on your shoulder, and then have you looking down at him. Mind if I touch ya hair, love?” You and your brother give Harry a funny look.

“Um, not at all.” He moves a few strands of hair from her face.

“Perfect.” Harry moves behind her to get the shot. “Just tilt your head up a wee bit, there ya go.” Another shot. “Dad, can we get ya on the other side of them?” Your brother move where he tells him. “That’s amazing, thank you.”

Harry takes a few more shots of just your sister in law and the baby. Then moves on to your brother and the baby. He got a really good one of him lifting him over his head.

“He’s bein’ so good, haven’t heard a peep yet.” Harry says.

“We fed him right before you guys got here. He snaps the minute he’s hungry.” Your brother explains. “You wanna hold him while we take our pictures?” He asks you.

“Of course!” You take your nephew. “Where’s his bubby in case he gets hungry?”

“In the kitchen, right side of the fridge.” You walk into the kitchen to grab the small bottle, and a rag to throw over your shoulder, just in case.

On cue, your nephew starts crying, but stops the second the nipple of the bottle hits his mouth. You soothe and feed him, sitting down in the rocking chair near the set up. Harry looks over at you, distracted by how gentle and sweet you are. Your brother coughs, grabbing his attention.

“Right.” He walks over to the two of them. “You’re a little stiff, just relax a little. Let’s put this arm here.” He takes your brother’s arm and puts it on the small of his wife’s back. “And you can you put your hand on his chest?” He furrows his brows looking over how they’re standing. “Can you put your other hand in your pocket? Ah! There we go.”

Harry goes over to the tripod, he flashes you a quick smile as you continue to feed the baby. He takes a few photos. You finish feeding your nephew, and sit him up to burp him. Once he does burp everyone starts laughing, and Harry is able to get a great candid shot of the two.

You hand the baby off to his mom so you can help Harry pack up his gear, and get everything into the car. When you both come back in, you see your sister in law has put out some snacks for everyone.

“Mind if I hold him?” Harry politely asks. She passes the baby off to him.

“Mm, this hummus is so good.” You say.

“It’s that fire roasted pepper one.” Your brother says sticking a carrot in. He takes his checkbook out of his pocket. “Harry, wanna talk shop in the kitchen?”

“Sure.” He follows your brother into the kitchen. Your sister in law leans close to you as you both sit on the couch.

“He’s such a doll.”

“I know. And so talented.”

“Incredibly professional. I see why you like him so much, if I heard a man call me love like that in that accent, I wouldn’t have let him go either.” You both giggle. “I’m so glad he was able to squeeze us in, he must be so busy this time of year.”

“You have no idea.” The boys comes back and sit in the area with you. Harry sits right next you, baby still in his arms.

You tell your brother all about your big work news, and how excited you are.

“But don’t tell mom or dad, I wanna tell them myself.”

“Sure thing, so Harry, are you gonna come to our uncle’s Hanukkah party next Saturday?”

“Plannin’ on it yeah.” You and your brother share a look, trying not to giggle.

“It’s a really fun party.” Your sister in law says. “I remember the first time I went.” She giggles. “It’s a great way to be initiated into the family.”

“What are you doing on Christmas this year? Another vacation with your girlfriends?” Your brother asks. You feel shy all of a sudden, and put your hand on Harry’s leg.

“Um…no. I’m actually going to England for a week or so with Harry, to meet his family.” Your brother and his wife look at each other then back to you.

“Does mom know?”

“Yes.”

“Does dad know?”

“No.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Don’t tell him either.”

“He has to know.”

“I’m not saying I won’t tell him, I just don’t need you spilling the beans, and then him calling me freaking out.”

“Why would your dad freak out?” Harry asks, adjusting the baby’s head to rest on his shoulder.

“He just…overthinks every little thing.” You explain. “You think he takes news well, then two days later he has a million different questions.”

“How long are you gone for?” You sister in law asks, trying to break some of the tension.

“The 23rd through the 29th, so literally a week. I’m really excited, I’ve never been to England before. Harry said we’re going to spend a couple days in London too. I’ll get to do all of the touristy stuff.”

“I’m sure it’ll be a lot of fun.” Your brother says. “What will you do for New Year’s?”

“Niall’s having a party.” You look up at Harry. The baby has fully passed out on him. “Oh look at him!” You rub the baby’s back. “You two just had to have the cutest baby in the world, didn’t you?”

“Mind if I take him back? I don’t want him freaking out when he wakes up.” Your sister in law giggles.

“Sure, thanks for the snuggle little guy.” Harry coos to the baby before passing him back over. “Well, I suppose we should get goin’, (y/n) and I are gonna celebrate her big news.” He stands up.

They walk you both to the door. Harry and your brother shake hands.

“Thanks again for everything.”

“No problem, and like I said I should have these for you in the next couple of days, you’ll be able to download all of the images and have them printed wherever.”

//

“So, where do you feel like going tonight? Anywhere you want.” Harry smiles at you in the car.

“Gosh, I don’t know! It would be fun to go somewhere that has dancing. I’m just so jazzed up.”

“That baby is the cutest baby I think I’ve ever seen.”

“Right? Can I ask how much you charged my brother? I hope he didn’t try to stiff you.”

“No, no, he didn’t. In fact, he wanted to overpay me. It all worked out, don’t worry. How come he got so weird about us going to England?”

“I think it’s just cause I’m leaving the country with you. My dad also has a way of putting him in the middle of things.”

“Do you want me there when you tell your dad?”

“God no, I’m gonna tell him over the phone so I can hang up if I need to. I’ll call him next week or something, I’m not really worried about it right now.”

Harry brings you both back to your apartment. You rummage through your clothes to find something to wear.

“We could go to that club a few blocks from here. You know the one that has food til a certain hour, and then the dance floor opens up?”

“Oh yeah! That would be perfect. I haven’t been there in a long time, probably since the summer.” You furrow your brows at the pile of laundry on your bed. “I cannot decide on an outfit! It’s gonna be cold tonight, so I know I should wear pants.” You scratch your head and dig for a pair of dark blue jeans that have a few intentional holes in them. “Hmm, what to wear with these though…oh!” You snatch your black crop top from the top of the pile. It was cute, tank top style, a little low cut, but it had a nice fringe on the bottom for some texture.

“A crop top?”

“Yeah, these pants are pretty high waisted, it looks good together.” You take your clothes off to change. “You know what, I need to find the right bra for this.” You walk over to your dresser and search for one that goes with the shirt. “I bought one to specifically wear with this top.”

Harry goes into your closet to put on a fresh t-shirt and sits on your bed to wait.

“Aha! Found it.” You put the bra and put the top on, and stand in front of him. “See? You can just barely see my piercing.” You point to your belly button. You go into the bathroom to throw a few curls in your hair and run your fingers through so it looks wavy. You put some night time makeup on and feel ready. “All set?”

“Yup.” He wraps his arms around you and gives you a kiss on the top of your head. “Uber’s here, let’s go.”

The bar area of the club was a little crowded when you got there, but because there only two of you (and maybe because you pushed your boobs up when you spoke with the host), you were able to get a small table after only five minutes. Since you were celebrating, you both ordered a big plate of nachos to split, and some tequila shots.

“I’m so glad you like doing tequila too. A lot of people don’t.” Harry says as you two clink the small glasses before tossing them back.

“I know! I don’t get it. I’ve never had a problem with tequila, ever.” You both decide it’s a good idea to stick with the same liquor, so you both order margaritas. “Margaritas and nachos, what could be a better combination of food?” You giggle, diving into the cheesy chips. “So, you’ll actually dance with me tonight?”

“Yes, I will.” He rolls his eyes playfully. “Maybe after a couple more drinks though.”

Harry loved watching you dance. You always had so much fun, and it made him have fun too. He loved hearing you say, “I love this song!”, to just about every song that would come on, and the way you’d yank him closer to you to dance. And you. You loved the way Harry would let loose in times like these, not caring if anyone was looking. The way he would move his hips along with yours, or when he’d stop to twirl you around, the quick kisses you’d share.

You both had a great night. Harry ordered an uber when you both agreed your feet were too tired and you both were just too drunk to keep dancing.

“That was so much fun!” You exclaim twirling around into your apartment. “Thanks again.” You wrap your arms around his neck, deadweighting him.

“Jesus.” He laughs, almost falling to the floor with you. “Alright, time for some water, yeah?” He lifts you up, and sits you down on the kitchen counter. He fills two glasses of water and hands you one. You both take small, slow sips. “I’m glad you had a good time.”

“I always do when I’m with ya.” You slur. He stands between your legs.

“Ready for bed?” You pout. “What?”

“Dontcha wanna love on me?” You run your hands through his hair. He rests his hands on your thighs.

“I do…but maybe in the mornin’, love.”

“Why?” You pout again, really jutting your bottom lip out.

“We’re both a little too drunk.”

“Not you, just I am.” He gives you a half smile.

“You’ll be mad at me if we do anythin’.”

“No I won’t.”

“(y/n).”

You lean down and kiss him, pulling him closer to you. His fingers press into your thighs. Your stomach starts to feel weird, so you let go of him.

“Oh no.” You say and hop off the counter.

“What? What oh no?” He looks at you very concerned.

“I think…I had too much dairy tonight, I don’t feel very well.” You put a hand over your mouth and run down to the bathroom attached to your room.

Harry quickly follows after you, and hears you throw up. He sighs, and goes to get a rag to run under some water, and a hair elastic. After he hears you flush the toilet, he comes in.

“No! Don’t come in, I don’t want you to see me like this!” You turn your face away. You feel him take your hair and put it into the elastic.

“Not the first time I’ve seen someone spew.” He crouches down next to you and presses the rag to your forehead. “Are you lactose intolerant? I didn’t think people threw up from that?”

“I’m sensitive to dairy, so I think because those nachos had so much cheese, plus the combi, the combi, oh no.” Harry stands up and uses his hand to brush back any hair he may have missed in your ponytail. He rubs your back while you vomit again. He pats the damp rag across your forehead again. “I’m so sorry.” You say, flushing the toilet and wiping your mouth.

“It’s alright, love. Happens to the best of us.”

“I think I’m through.” He helps you stand up, and you look at yourself in the mirror. “Yikes.” Your makeup had run down your face from tears. You run the water in the sink and brush your teeth. You turn the hot water on and grab your makeup remover rag. Harry watches you as he stands in the doorway.

“Don’t think I’ve seen someone only yak twice from drinkin’.”

“I told you.” You dry off your face with a hand towel. “It was from the dairy, the cheese.” You make a disgusted face. “Not eating that for a long time.” You look at him and sigh. “That was disgusting, I’m sorry you had to see me like that.” You take your hair out of Harry’s makeshift ponytail, and shake it out.

“S’alright, vomit doesn’t really bother me.” He shrugs, and follows you to your bed. He takes his shirt off, then his pants, and you do the same. He kisses you on your temple before going into the bathroom to do his thing.

You got cozied up in his t-shirt, and got into your side of the bed. He comes out and joins you.

“Sure you’ll be alright?”

“Yeah, I don’t think I’m gonna dry heave or anything.”

“Guess that was one way to sober up. C’mere.” You rest your head on his chest, and he puts an arm around you.

//

The next morning you both wake up around ten. For once, you wake up almost completely on top of Harry. You must have fallen asleep on his chest and never rolled over. You rub your eyes as you start to wake up, and see that he’s sitting up, reading from his book.

“Mornin’.” He says looking down at you with a smile.

“Shower?” He nods yes, and you both get up.

You both brush your teeth before going in. You felt gross from last night still. You peel his t-shirt off and put your hair up. You both step in to the warm water, and stand in it together, arms wrapped around each other. You felt groggier than usual, and could feel slight cramps forming in your lower back. You groan into him.

“Whatsa matter, love?” He says, chin resting on your head.

“Getting my period this week.” You knew that already due to your birth control tabs, but it was still annoying nonetheless. “I’ve got the precramps.”

“Better to get it now than while we’re away though right? Less things you’ll have to pack.”

“That’s true. I hate getting it when I’m traveling.” You nestle into his chest more.

Harry takes your chin between his fingers and tilts your head up to look at him. He leans in and gives you a soft kiss on the lips. You nuzzle your noses together, making you smile. You wrap your arms around his neck, and go up on your tiptoes so you can kiss him properly. His hands moving down to squeeze your butt. You feel him harden against you, and you press yourself more on him. You tongue enters his mouth to find his, and you’re happy when you’re greeted with his.

You push him back against the cold tile, taking him by surprise a bit. Harry’s mind can’t help but race. If you would let him, he’d pick you up and put you against the wall. He would drive into you with his hard cock and have you screaming his name. But no…he couldn’t have that yet, and it was driving him nuts. He was genuinely curious, though, about exactly what you planned to do with him right now.

You lace your fingers through his hair, and gently tug. Your mouth moves to his neck and you bite down on him. He groans, tilting his head back. You push your body as close as you possibly can to him, as you suck on his skin harder. What is she trying to do to me? He asks himself. You reach down between the two of you, and wrap your hand around his throbbing cock. He sucks in a breath as you work your thumb over his leaking tip. You lean your forehead against his chest as you look down. You take a deep breath as you rub him against you.

“Woah!” He flinches. “What’s, um, what’s happening right now?”

“I just…” You look up at him. “I just wanna rub the tip against my clit. Can I do that? Please?” He blinks at you. “And then I’ll suck you off, okay? I’m not trying to tease, I just wanna feel you against me.”

“O, okay.”

You look back down, and move his tip to rub against your clit. The contact felt amazing to you both. His slick tip rubbing against your clit had your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“Fuck.” He groans, eyes closed and teeth clenched. His hands move to your breasts, and knead them, needing something to hold onto.

You move one of your legs up around one his legs so you can get a better angle. Harry pries his eyes open to watch your hand around him.

“I’m, I’m not gonna last much longer.” He says, panting.

You drop to your knees and take him into your mouth. His hands rest gently on your shoulders, not wanting to pull your hair in fear of triggering you again. His hips thrust forward, hitting the back of your throat. You need to use one hand to pump him, not able to take all of him into your mouth. Your other hand was on his hip, fingers pressing harshly into him.

“God, you take it so well.” He says through a moan. You groan against him, and the vibration makes his hips roll further. His nails are digging into your shoulders as you bob faster on him. “Fuck, (y/n), I’m gonna come!” His hot come splurts into your mouth, and you swallow every last drop.

You stand up, and rinse your mouth out in the shower water. Harry quickly pulls you over to him, pushing you against the tiles this time. He kneels in front of you, and connects his mouth to your clit. Your hands go right to his hair. He holds on your thighs up so he can get his tongue inside you easier. You almost lose your balance.

“Ah! Harry!” You moan. “Please, please just take me to the bed!”

He stands up, both of your pupils are blown out. He quickly turns the water off, kneels back down, and lifts you up over his shoulder. Neither of you care that you’re soaking wet, you’ll just throw the blankets in the dryer later.

Harry puts you down on the bed, and gets on top of you. He kisses you firmly, you stick your tongue in his mouth and he sucks on it. You moan loudly as his thumb presses down on your clit.

“You really want it, don’t you?” He asks, biting down on your collar bone.

“Fuck! Yes, I do. So bad. Please, let me feel your fingers.” Harry’s jaw clenches, he should have known that’s what you meant. But his small glimmer of hope told him you wanted more than that.

He bites down on you harder, sucking on your skin, leaving a nice purple bruise in its place. He had to do this. He had to get his frustration out somehow. And you were letting him. His fingers plunge inside you, making your hips buck up towards him.

“I love how wet and tight you are, it feels amazing.” He says into your ear, taking the skin just underneath between his teeth. Your nails sink into his shoulders. They rake down his back as he pumps in and out faster.

Your hands grip onto his butt, and your nails sink into his cheeks as you move your hips to grind against his hand. He bit down on your neck harder, he was hard again, there was no doubt about that. He grinds himself against one of your hips.

“Harry, fuck!” He hit that spot that you love so much. He didn’t even need to rub your clit to make you come, this felt good enough. “Harry!” You’re screaming his name. You weren’t sure what made you feel so hot today, maybe it was the hormones, but you didn’t care. You didn’t care if your neighbors heard you screaming either.

You release all over his fingers, he removes himself from your quickly, and grips himself. He jacks off onto your stomach. Your mouth falls even further open at the sight. He collapses next to you as you both catch your breaths.

“Holy shit.” You say, closing your eyes.

“Sorry, I, it was just…I had to come again.” He says looking down at your stomach.

“It’s okay.” You smile at him. “I can’t always be the one to come more than once.”

“Let me go get a rag to wipe you up with.”

“No, it’s okay.” He raises an eyebrow at you and you giggle. “I’m gonna go hop back in the shower quick. Could you throw these blankets in the dryer while I’m in there.”

“Mhm.” You kiss him quick.

“Thanks.”

You get up and go into the bathroom. You gasp when you see yourself in the mirror. You put your hand over your mouth so he doesn’t hear, and you close the door. You inspect the many large, purple bruises on your neck and collar bone. These were going to be hard to cover, and they were going to take a long time to heal. You rinse off quick, and wrap yourself in a towel. Harry is in the kitchen making smoothies.

“Love, I made breakfast.” He smiles handing you a glass.

“Thank you.” You take a sip. “Mm, yum!” You take another big sip and put your glass down. “Um, babe?”

“Yeah?” He looked so good, just standing there in his tight black boxers. You rub your hand over your neck. “Jesus.” He pulls your hand away. “Shit, I did a number on you huh?”

“Yeah, in a couple different spots.” You had two prominent love bites on your neck, and two more on your collar bone. He rubs his thumb softly over them.

“Did it hurt?”

“Um…yes, but…not in a bad way.” You blush. You look up at his neck. “I gave you a pretty good one too.”

“Mhm.” He smiles.

“You don’t mind?”

“Nah, they heal pretty quickly. They’re not that noticeable on my skin. But you’re a little fairer than I am.”

“They’re just hard to cover with makeup. I’ll need to wear a scarf or something. Um…I like getting them, I like the way they feel. Just…when you feel the need to bite me that hard, could you find a more discrete spot?” Harry cocks his head and looks at you. He takes a sip of his smoothie.

“But if I did that, how would everyone around you know you had a boyfriend?” He walks by you, leaving you stunned, and sits down on your couch. You sit down next to him, sipping on your breakfast. “I mean, that’s how everyone knows I’m seein’ someone.”

“It’s just not very…professional. People will notice, and talk. Otherwise I wouldn’t care where you did it.”

“But I like it best on your neck. It’s my favorite place to bite into. You’d deprive me of that?” You were sweating. If he kept talking to you like that, you weren’t sure how much longer you’d last before your lips were wrapped around him again.

“N, no. You can do it without leaving such a large mark can’t you? I mean, what if my family saw?”

“Alright, ya got me there.” He fake pouts. “Guess I can try to be more careful.” He sighs. “Anythin’ ya need to do today?” You mean other than you? You thought to yourself.

“Hmm, I wouldn’t mind going to Walmart, I’m low on some stuff. But you don’t need to come with if that doesn’t sound like fun.” You laugh.

“Nah, I need some stuff too, now that I think about it.”

“Great, I’ll drive us.” He frowns. “Am I a bad driver or something?”

“What? No! I just prefer driving.”

“Why?” He just shrugs at you. “Well, I would like to drive if that’s okay.”

“Alright.” You get up, and he watches you walk into your room. Something about your ass shaking in a towel made him smile. He gets up to follow you.

The second you dropped your towel, Harry’s arms were wrapped around you, pressing your back to his chest. You giggle as he presses kisses to your neck and shoulder.

“Harry…”

“What?” He whispers in your ear.

“We’ll have all day to do this, but we need to go to the store now, okay?” He rolls his eyes and lets go of you.

“All day, huh?” That shit eating grin covers his face, and this time you roll your eyes.

“You’re ridiculous.”

[staticscreenwriting]

I don’t love you // Chapter 1

Chapter One - Bluebird 

Synopsis: Jess is over Rory, only he’s not. Olivia is tired of trying to find the one piece missing from her life, only she’s not. A wedding, a bus ride, a lost notebook and an unforseen offer bring these two together and spark the idea that maybe the best people do enter your life in the most unexpected ways. A/N: I’ve uploaded parts of this story before on a blog specifically dedicated to it but I want most of my writing in one place so here’s a reupload. This is NOT a literati fic! 

" There's a bluebird in my heart that wants to get out but I'm too tough for him,I say, stay in there,

I'm not going to let anybody see you. "

- Bluebird (Charles Bukowski)

There was an ice cold beer clutched in his hand, half empty already, and a lady to his right that had been trying to engage in a conversation about the weather for the last 15 minutes. None of that really mattered, none of that he really acknowledged.

There was only her. Her dancing and laughing and singing along to the cheesy pop songs he knew she'd never admit to liking but secretly sang along to at home when she thought no one was watching. Her and the way her hair that had been perfectly pinned back earlier was now slowly coming undone, strands framing her perfect face that had changed so much and yet so little in all this time.

Her and her all consuming, breathtaking, heart shattering beauty. Her and all the memories of all the feelings that had ever been there and would always be there.

God, he was so screwed.

This was the "I love you" all over again, the Yale visit, the open house. He had honestly thought he had left this part of his past behind. That he was over her. He had tried over and over and it never ended with a happily ever after for him, not with her. Maybe they just weren't meant to be.

He had really thought he'd learned his lesson and yet here he was staring at her and wondering if he'd ever completely get over her or if he might be doomed to forever be in love with Rory Gilmore.

" You know if you keep staring at her any longer it's gonna change from kinda cute to downright creepy, right ?! " he heard his younger cousin's voice speak up as she plopped down in the seat to his right, the weather lady had apparently gotten the hint that he was not interested in a conversation with her and had wandered off at some point.

" What do you know ? Aren't you busy being edgy, smoking, finding yourself ? " he replied and gave April little smirk and a friendly shove with his shoulder. She was a peculiar one his cousin, had been since the first time he'd met her but she'd done a lot of growing up over the years and had turned from a strange kid into quite the smart and witty adult, pseudo hippy phase and all.

" Haha, aren't you funny, Jess. Seriously though, what's up with the longing looks ? "

" Ah you know, just figuring out that I'm still in love with the girl I dated when I was in high school. The girl that made me change into the person I am today. The girl that is the sole reason I became a better person. " Is what he thought but there was no way in hell Jess would ever talk about his feelings. Ever. " Don't know what you're talking about. "

" Sure you don't. Just sayin' you could go over there and actually talk to her instead of glaring a hole through her head."

That he could do, but what would he say ?

"Hey Rory, sorry to interrupt but I just realized that part of me is still madly in love with you. " ?

" Oh hi there Rory, been watching you all night wondering if we ever stood a chance, wondering if we still might stand one. Wondering if this could ever be us, getting married and all that. " ?

Those were the things that were ghosting through his head but he'd be damned if he ever told those to anyone, especially Rory. He'd tried that before, multiple times, and look how that turned out. To be fair one of those times he ran off, but that was only that one time.

No, there really wasn't anything he could tell her that would change anything about this situation. She had enough on her plate as it was, she was writing a book for god's sake and if anyone knew how stressful and chaotic that time is, it was Jess. The last thing she'd need was him bringing up old feelings and confusion.

" There's nothing to talk about. "

" Okay, James Dean. I know that whole repressing your emotions deal runs in the family and works well with the grumpy mysterious guy image you're trying to maintain but that needs to stop. You're clearly still into this girl and I'm not gonna sit here and watch you throw away what might be your last shot at your epic love story. "

" Oh Jesus when did you start getting so corny. Does Lorelei make you watch 80s romcoms when you're over at their place ? Does Luke know she's doing this to you ? "

" Jess, I'm serious. Sometimes you gotta fight for the things you want. "

For the first time in a while Jess left his gaze drift from Rory and turned towards his cousin.

" I'm 33 years old, April. I'm done fighting over girls, fighting for girls. Things either work out or they don't and they obviously didn't for me and her. "

" But what if you're her Luke ? "

" What if I'm not ? What if I don't want to be ? I don't want her to settle for me after years and years of trying. I want to be a conscious decision. For once in my life I want someone to chose me. Not because of a feeling of guilt or nostalgia or comfort or because they feel like they owe me or because they feel responsible. I'm done with this. I can't do it all over again. "

A silence settled upon them as neither of them really knew where those words had suddenly come from. If there was one thing you didn't except from Jess Mariano it was as sudden outburst of honest emotions.

" Okay. "

" Okay ? "

" Okay, I get it. I didn't mean to push you to do something you don't want to do. I just wanted to help. I want you to be happy. "

" I am happy. "

" Are you ? "

Was he ? Yeah. Sure. Truncheon was going well, he liked his job, liked his coworkers, his friends. He had his own little apartment & his own car. He was in the process of coming up with ideas for a second book. He wasn't particularly phased by the fact that he'd been single for a while now either. Whenever he felt like it Jess had no problem sweet talking a girl at a bar. Girls, he had found out a while ago, were totally into the broody writer persona.

Was he truly happy though ? He didn't know.

" Yeah. "

" Okay. "

" Look, April. You know I'm not big on the whole family reunion stuff, especially here in Stars Hollow where half the population still holds a grudge against me. I came for Luke but he and Lorelei ran off a while ago so there's really no harm in me leaving too, right ? "

It was the truth, Jess wasn't particularly thrilled about returning to the Connecticut town he'd spend some time in as a teenager, but there was no way in hell he could've said no to Luke. The man had done more for him than anyone in his entire life, his mom included. He'd been one of the few who'd believed in him when even Jess himself had almost lost hope that he'd ever amount to something. He owed Luke so much and showing up to his wedding was the least he could do.

" You've been drinking. "

" Last bus is leaving in 20 minutes. "

" To Philly ? That's a long ass drive, Jess. Are you sure you don't wanna crash at the apartment above Luke's and leave tomorrow ? "

" I got a book with me, it'll be fine. No offense April, but if I don't leave now I'm just getting sucked back into things that I should've left behind a long time ago."

" What about your car ? "

" I was thinking, maybe my favorite cousin would like to come visit me in Philadelphia before she goes back home, and maybe she could bring my car with her? " April stared at him for a moment and Jess could see the gears turning in her head, trying to come up with an idea to get him to stay. His mind was made up though, if he'd stay he'd have to get drunk and if there was one place Jess Mariano didn't want be drunk at, it was the town center of Stars Hollow with his ex girlfriend in close proximity.

" Alright " April said and let out a defeated sigh " Be careful and don't talk to any sleazy looking guys. "

" Yeah okay, mom. " Jess replied and took a last sip on his now empty bottle of beer.

As he got up off the chair, Jess' glance wandered back over to Rory. He could go after her, fight for her, show her the man he was today and how this was all for her. He could. But he didn't. Because he was scared ? Maybe. But also because he was just tired. Tired of running after the same girl over and over again. Always failing.

" Just so you know, I don't think you're doing the right thing. Just running from your emotions. " April spoke up. " Well cousin, I don't think you're doing the right thing getting your nose pierced and acting like a pothead when they could probably sell you oregano without you noticing. Yet here I am, accepting your decisions. "

" You're an ass. " April responded as a small smirk tugged at the corners of her lips.

" That's family. Thought you'd be used to that by now. Seriously though, don't worry about me kid. "

" That's family, Jess. We always worry. Thought you'd be used to that by now " She replied with a smile before walking away, back into the sea of Stars Hollow residents that were singing and dancing to some obscure 90s popsong.

This family, his family, was quite honestly a mess. It was a family though, something he hadn't had for the longest time. And no matter how strange or broken over overly intrusive or annoying they were, they meant the world to him. Because they were his people and to them, to Luke and April he was a conscious decision. It was their decision to care and to worry and Sometimes you gotta admit defeat.

With one last look towards Rory, the girl that changed it all, Jess turned his back towards the gazebo covered in dozens of fairy lights and the quirky town that surrounded it and took on the walk towards the bus stop. Maybe April was right and he was just running from his emotions and his crippling fear of rejection. But so what ? Sometimes you gotta let yourself be scared to save yourself from pain.

Sometimes you gotta run.

[infinitum-imaginaerum]

Minghao | F.24 “I never want you to think you’re anything less than my top priority.” | @linmeixing​ Words | 3,550 Notes | It may not be as gangster!au as you were hoping, so for that I’m sorry!  Thank you for coming and re-requesting because I really enjoyed writing this a lot! Warnings: mentions of violence and blood, gang activity.

Send me a bias, a section, and a number and I’ll write you a thing!

Ever since leaving home, you’d been moving around, a lot. Initially, your mother didn’t like the idea of you going to live with Minghao, but settled into the fact when she realized that your living situation was a lot more stable than she initially had thought—too bad she was right all along. The initial period after leaving, Minghao was able to keep a stable roof over your head, but anything was possible with a guy like him who was involved in the things he was involved in.

He always tried to remind you that it was for your safety that you continued to move around, and you tried to keep up the charade with your mother that you were still at the same address but somehow managed to sneak out of ever inviting her over for dinner or anything like that. You used the excuse that both of you were really busy and you often never saw each other because of work which technically wasn’t a lie, but she had no idea the type of work Minghao was involved in and would never approve of you being in this situation had she known just how deep into illegal things he actually was.

Most of the time you moved, it was incredibly spur of the moment. Sometimes you had to spend the night on a worn mattress in the middle of an abandoned apartment building or warehouse room. Sometimes you got tired of it, sometimes those nights pushed you. Things were often not perfect but when he took you by the waist and smiled down at you, reassuring you that everything was going to work out—those were the times when staying was the easiest.

Minghao’s societal role had always been confusing and somewhat taboo information to you. You often didn’t ask what he was involved with because when you did, he told you not to worry about it and that the two of you were going to be fine. You soon came to realize that it typically meant dangerous things were happening behind closed doors and he just didn’t want to worry you; despite that, you were an incessant worrier and Minghao had to find ways around that to cope with your borderline anxiety attacks any time he’d leave the house or miss a check in or phone call with you, especially when you were cooped up in a dusty-dirty old abandoned shack of some kind with no means of real transportation or food other than take-out.  

You hoped, desperately, that one day your world would be turned somewhat upside-down and that you would have a stable place to actually make a home. Only one outlet at work would let you vent to them about the struggles of always moving around without asking too much about why it was, and more often than not never criticized you about staying with a man you loved despite the difficulties that drove you absolutely mad.

It was a special kind of love you carried for Minghao; a loyalty unrivaled that he was constantly reminding you that he was grateful for. He divulged to you from time to time the difficulties of having love by one’s side when involved in the things he was involved with—most of his “coworkers” faced abandonment on many occasions and he swore he wouldn’t know what to do without you. Even if you didn’t know what was going on 99% of the time, you always gave him sound advice and a confidence that lifted his spirits about the things that went on since he knew he was far too deep to back out without some time and a plan.

It had been a long day at work for you. Your feet were tired, your bag heavy on your shoulder as you trekked up to your beaten front door. Forlornly, you looked at it, glazed over all the cracks and crevices and the paint chipping away from it, to the strike plate almost falling off the door that barely fit it the frame and you wondered why you even kept a key because there was no use locking that door in the first place. One swift kick would do the trick and the door would probably never shut again.

Regardless, you tucked the key into the slot and turned, the gears tumbling inside to unlock it and your other hand twisted the handle which promptly fell through the hole in the door where it was supposed to be affixed and into your hand. With a sigh, you gave the door a good shove with your shoulder, busting the strike plate off the frame and effectively swinging the door into your home.

Minghao was sitting on the couch, a lovely little thing you’d picked up at a discount furniture store once he promised you’d have a semi-permanent residence to make it a little homier with no intention of keeping if you had ever come across a permanent residence. He was only slightly shocked that the door had been busted in and a little more shocked to see the dingy bronze knob in your exhausted hand. His gaze gently trailed from the knob and your hand up to your tired eyes which made no advance to scan the room for a moment before being able to feel his gaze in the side of your face.

Your face said it all. No greetings were exchanged between the two of you, just a pathetic look on your face as you softly placed the knob on a rickety end table before he was engulfing you in his arms. His expensive fragrance—personal items you could actually spend money on without feeling bad because they were more easily movable—encapsulated you as you swayed in his arms, nose shoved deep into the shoulder of his soft jacket as your arms loosely wound around his waist.  Minghao gently kissed against your head, showering you with soft affection and let you rest in his arms as long as you needed. Desperately, you wanted at least a shower and to change clothes and thankfully the water of the crumbling building you were in could get hot enough to relax you just a bit. The tub was put together, at least, and the shower curtain you’d bought was perhaps the most luxurious thing in the bathroom with the exception of your personal items and your three-ply toilet paper.

“Why don’t you get cleaned up and we can go get some dinner,” he uttered to you. A huge chunk of you didn’t want to let him go; you feared that if you did, the waterworks would be uncontrollable. How desperate you were to live in a place you didn’t feel like you’d get broken into on any given day, in a place where the light fixtures weren’t falling off the ceiling in some way or the wiring didn’t buzz audibly through the walls. How you wished to live in a place where you could wake up to the gentle sunrise through the sheer curtains of your room window on a plushy mattress curled up with your love and have little worries other than what you were going to make for dinner.  

“I know you’re struggling, darling. We’ve moved four time in the past month. I know those tears pricking your eyes are frustration and dismay. I know this life is very hard and you have been so loyal sticking by me through everything even when I kept you in the dark. Believe me when I say I never want you to think you’re anything less than my top priority—”

“Minghao, I can’t do this anymore,” you finally sobbed freely, interrupting him even as you tried to hide your face against the shoulder of his expensive Givenchy jacket.

He didn’t want to blow anything, but with the desperation in your voice, with the way it cracked and the way you clawed at his jacket trying to stave your hyperventilation, he had to say something else.

“Give me one more day, darling. Stay with me tonight, and if after tonight you don’t want to do it anymore still, I’ll let you go if that is your wish. Please, just let me take you out to dinner and spend the night together, that’s all I ask,” he pleaded, cupping the back of your head as he spoke softly to you.

One more day; that wasn’t too much to ask. The door knob thing really kicked you down to the lowest you’d ever felt, but after four moves and Minghao coming home with a bloodied cheek in a hurry to move you from your apartment building—you just couldn’t watch him like this anymore. It was often he came home beaten at least a little bit, spitting blood and icing an eye socket, knuckles bruised to bits gritting his teeth. You tended his wounds, even when he tried to bat you away because he never wanted you to see him like that. Even he couldn’t resist the way you sat at his feet while he hunched over in a chair, watching you dab at the injuries on his hands or similar.

You could feel the desperation of his plea when he finally reeled back to kiss you. His lips were a little chapped, but the way they curled around yours was ethereal as he kissed you with tenderness other worldly. He cupped both your cheeks with his warm, wide hands as if he was holding the finest porcelain. A couple of lingering kisses he lay against your lips before reminding you to shower and get dressed up, because he knew how good it made you feel when you looked good and he told you so.

So, with that, you showered the longest shower that the water heater would provide you, scalding your skin to the point you could handle before you got ready at his request.  He sat on the couch, waiting for you to emerge from the room, and when you did, he was just as floored as he always was when laying eyes on you.  You donned a three quarters sleeve navy evening gown. The top was lacey and elegant, the skirt pleated and satin with a scoop neck cut for a modesty he couldn’t have appreciated more.

It almost got to your nerves, the way he looked at you as you came out of the bedroom.  

“You are the most ethereal and gorgeous being I’ve ever had the pleasure and privilege of laying eyes on,” he told you as he made his way to his feet. Your shy gaze turned away from him as you gripped your clutch in your hands. It was a gown that he’d bought you not that long ago, an extravagant gift to make you feel special and boy did it, not to mention you were positively in love with it. He took your chin between tender fingers and guided your gaze back to him.

“Are we sure you’re mortal, because only a goddess could be as beautiful as you,” he whispered, taking the small of your back with his coaxing hand to tug you into him. “Royalty, at the very least,” he added, taking your hand to bring it up to his lips to kiss the back of it.

“This queen is only a queen at the side of her king,” you muttered back, finally having the confidence to look into his eyes.  The smile that tugged at the corner of his lips and turned into to a full-fledged grin melted your heart and it all came rushing back to you the reasons you fell in love with him in the beginning.

“This king would be nothing without his queen, for she is the one who gives him strength every single day with just a soft smile and a gentle touch. She reminds him that without the bad times, the good times would be lackluster. She reminds him what its all worth fighting for, and to dig in and keep fighting,” he whispered to you, holding your knuckles against his lips as he swayed with you until you cracked even a sliver of a smile.

He whisked you up next to him, joined at the hip as he took you down to the car to take you to dinner. He treated you like you were the queen he claimed, spoiling you the way he did as often as he could. It almost made you forget the incident at your apartment, almost. Still, it lingered in the back of your mind like a bad exam grade and he could feel it even in the way he clutched your hand against his leg under the table as you picked at your desert with almost no enthusiasm at all.

Minghao eyed the side of your face, watching your glazed over eyes stare right through the table while your hand released its gentle grip on his thigh, enough that he was able to lace his fingers through yours. He couldn’t help but reach over and take the cheek furthest away from him to bring your face gently to his and place a chaste kiss against your cheek.

“Not even your favorite dessert brings a smile to your face,” he whispered.

“Minghao,” you voiced delicately and finally turned your gaze to him.

“My love,” he uttered back, meeting you half way to brush his nose affectionately against yours. “I didn’t want to spoil it, but I think I have the remedy to all your worries.”

“And what is that?” you asked.

“I think it would be better to show you, than to tell you,” he replied. You looked at him, longingly, looking between his eyes to get the smallest hint of what it could possibly be. There were few things that could ease your worries and one of them you prayed didn’t have to happen, but you were reaching your end. You picked over your dessert with a little more interest as he paid the tab.

Out the window of the car, the city lights passed by and it was a good few moments for you to realize you weren’t heading in the right direction of your apartment. His hand was laced tightly with yours, rubbing over your knuckles with his thumb as he kept his eyes on the road, occasionally peeking over at you as you glowered out the window.

“Where are we going?” you finally asked, lifting your chin from your hand propping your head up to look out the window and faced him.

“Somewhere very special,” he replied simply, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. “Somewhere I think you’ll like a lot.”

The tops of the skyscrapers you passed couldn’t be seen from the inside of the car, and you were fairly certain they couldn’t be seen from the outside of the car, either. You were getting to the fancier part of town again, closer to where you worked which caused a long commute you were beginning to hate, even if it did allow for ample reading time on the train.  Minghao showed no signs of giving it up too soon, even when you pulled into a numbered covered parking space inside a garage of a condominium building. You wondered what you were doing there; but maybe this was the surprise, that Minghao had asked you to stay one night with him so he could prove to you how much you meant to him. It was far from what you were looking for, but for the moment you appreciated the gesture, especially as he helped you out of the car.  

You wanted to ask so many questions, Minghao could almost see it on your face which is why he chose to not look at you so much. He led you into the elevator and pressed a floor button, you weren’t really paying attention to which as it didn’t seem to matter—it would be part of your distant past soon enough. You looked around the ornate boards of the shiplap wall of the elevator, tasteful mirrors mounted against them even as he took your hand and brought it to his lips once more. His other hand was tucked deep into his pocket, fiddling with something in there, fingers touching over smooth metal with an engraving on it until the elevator signaled the arrival to your floor.

In front of you were three doors, one to the right, the middle, and the left. The jingling in Minghao’s pocket was enough to bring your gaze over to him as he produced the key in front of you. There was a small keychain on it which glinted in the light of the communal foyer, but the engraving was half-covered by Minghao’s finger until he wrapped it up in your hand.

“What’s this all about?” you asked him.

“That, my queen,” he whispered and leaned over to kiss your temple, “is the key to our new permanent castle.”

You arms almost dislocated, or it felt that way, as your shoulders slumped so hard as the shock washed over you almost instantly. Your gaze turned to him with a look that would strike an enemy dead, begging him to not be playing with you. Your eyes glimmered in the light and if he thought you couldn’t look more beautiful before, he had been proven seriously wrong.

“Hao,” you warned, fiddling the key between your fingers.

“I can’t wait until you see the inside,” he replied with a tinge of glee. He guided your hand with the key to the lock, a sturdy thing that didn’t jiggle at all; it was tight in its slot, the strike plate shiny and new, the door frame probably steel of some sort instead of some flimsy decaying wood. The greased lock turned with ease, almost silently tumbling until it opened, Minghao’s hand over yours turned the handle to push the door open.

Your free hand clapped over your mouth as you looked into the foyer and through to the living room. All you could really make out for the time being was a large area rug placed in the middle of the sleek wood floors with your dream sectional sofa, a Victorian-esque designed piece of furniture you’d circled in a magazine and gushed about to Minghao for your forever home, if you ever got one, and a matching wood and glass coffee table. The drapes behind it were right out of your fantasy interior design studio, matching the sofa and the rest of the room, and that was only the living room.

“Minghao,” you uttered again, turning to him with tears glossing your eyes over.

“Go in,” he encouraged, ushering you with a small push against your back to bring you through the front door. You looked around, internally gushing over the décor, the modern appliances in your beautiful sleek kitchen that you’d cook many meals in together, the dinning area that was to die for, the living room over again, a peek into the bathroom where the light fixtures were brushed nickel, polished and sturdily affixed to their proper spots with a gorgeous vanity and you could only dream what the master bathroom looked like.

The bedroom you were too eager to see. You skipped most everything else to walk into a room easily two times the size of your biggest master bedroom to date. The furniture in it was things you’d pointed out while window shopping with Minghao in your free time; your bed, fit for a king and queen was baroque—simply gorgeous. A bed big enough to comfortable accommodate the both of you instead of struggling for space.

“What do you think? Think you could live here permanently?” he asked you.

“Is that a threat or a promise?” you asked him, turning around.

“It’s a promise; I promised you stability, I promised you a forever home. I promised you, and your mother, that I would take care of you. You’ve been nothing but patient, kind, and loving with me, and I wanted to return the favor by coming through on those promises. So, as long as you think you can give it, and me, another shot… it’s yours,” he reminded you, speaking about before dinner when you proclaimed you couldn’t do it anymore.

“You mean I get to live here, with you, with no surprise moving?”

“With me, with no surprise moving ever again.”

“I get to fall asleep in this bed with you every night, and wake up to you every morning?” you clarified.

“If that is your wish…” he trailed off, peering at you from under his lashes with the most dashing half-smile, a smile that had your heart picking up some beats as it tried to crawl into your throat.

You didn’t even bother reply, just wrapped your arms around his neck and buried into him enough to push your tears back. He held you just as tenderly as he always had, taking in your scent like he’d never experience it again. There was a new, rejuvenated aura to you, bringing back the old you he made all those promises to. You’d never strayed from being true to him, but somehow it felt different. It felt at ease, more effortless, more like you were head-over-heels for him all over again.

[rejectedusername-trashfics]

RT Extra Life 1337 fic- Clear Avoidance

Summary: Gavin can read minds and tries to use that to figure out what Ryan likes. Turn’s out, both he and Ryan are idiots and it’s giving Geoff a headache.

Word Count: 1,353

Pairings: Gavin/Ryan

AO3

Gavin Free was what one would consider a clairvoyant. While he was very social and open with many, considering his job, he tended to keep is extra special ability a secret. He was a mind-reader. He could tell what people were thinking and subtly use that knowledge to annoy his coworkers and friends. The only person besides his family that knew of his ability was Geoff. Geoff knew because he was also a clairvoyant; he was an empath, feeling and occasionally manipulating the emotions of others. Gavin and Geoff were able to understand each other because of their supernatural abilities This didn’t mean their abilities didn’t annoy each other, though.

One day in fall, Achievement Hunter was filming a Let’s Play. Everyone in the group was very focused on what they doing, but Gavin seemed extra distracted. He would sneak glances at someone else, occasionally, but he seemed lost in thought otherwise. Geoff was able to pick up on something being up with him.

“Gavin,” Geoff started to think. “I’m getting strong feelings of infatuation coming off of you and you’re staring at someone and I can’t figure out who. Who do you have a crush on?”

Gavin sighed. “I can never get anything past you, can I? I have a bit of a crush on Ryan, alright?” he thought.

Geoff’s eyebrows furrowed when he was met with silence. “You know I can’t read your mind, right?” he said to remind Gavin that the mind-reading only went one-way.

“Yeah, Gavin. We can see the gears turning in your head. What’s up with you, today?” Michael asked.

“’More like the one gear,” Ryan joked.

“Rye-bread, don’t be mean,” Gavin whined.

“I’m just kidding. I know you’re very smart.”

Gavin’s cheeks blushed. Then he got up and grabbed Geoff out of the room. “Woah, why the sudden exit? Is your crush on Ryan?” Geoff asked.

Gavin’s blush deepened and he nodded. “But don’t say it out loud,” he replied, meekly.

Geoff let out an exasperated sigh. “You’re the mind-reader, right?” he thought. Gavin nodded to answer. “Then use your mind-reading abilities to figure out what he likes.”

“GEOFF YOU’RE BLOODY BRILLIANT!” Gavin squealed.

“Come on, let’s go back in the room,” Geoff said. Once the two of them got back in the room, they saw that everyone was eating pie. “Who brought pie in?”

“Caiti brought in apple pie because it was close to Thanksgiving and she thought it was a good idea,” Jack replied.

“That was nice of her.”

“I’m excited because I love apple pie,” Jeremy said.

“Me, too,” Ryan replied in agreement. “Man, I wish I had a lover to bring apple pie in for me. Or maybe peach pie. It would remind me a little bit of home,” he thought to himself.

Gavin’s eyes widened as he read Ryan’s thoughts and heard a simple first gift idea. “Don’t worry, Rye-bread. You’ll get your peach pie, tomorrow,” Gavin thought to himself in response.

The next morning, Gavin came in with a store-bought, peach pie. He walked over an placed the pie at Ryan’s desk.

“Dude, what’s the occasion for YOU bringing in pie?” Michael asked.

“No occasion,” Gavin answered.

“It’s a little early for pie, but I’ll take it,” Michael said as he walked over to the pie. When he reached for the pie and a knife to cut it with, Gavin slapped is hand away. “Dude, what gives?!”

“It’s not for YOU!”

Michael looked down and realized that it was on Ryan’s desk. “Is it for…” he started and paused when he saw that Gavin was narrowing his eyes. “Oh, I see. Well good luck with that.”

Michael when back to his desk. The rest of the Hunters piled in for the day, and Gavin eagerly waited for Ryan to show up. Gavin’s eyes lit up when he finally saw Ryan walking through the door. “Ryan, I brought you…” he started to say.

“I know it’s starting to get cold, but I brought ice cream,” Ryan announced to the room.

“P… what?” Gavin asked as he tilted his head in confusion.

“Hey, did you bring pie in, Gav? Because ice cream compliments pie,” Ryan asked.

“Ice cream and pie sounds awesome!” Jeremy cheered. This prompted Gavin to reluctantly share the peach pie around the room. Gavin groaned in defeat as the room happily enjoyed their slices of pie; he would have to find another gift to win Ryan’s affections.

Gavin tried day after day to give Ryan something that he had subconsciously wanted. But somehow, Ryan would always be one step ahead of him. When Gavin gave up on the mind-reading and just tried to ask him about things he wanted, Ryan had just started avoiding him. This upset Gavin even more.

After Gavin had given Ryan a video game that he had been excited about, but already had at home, Ryan walked over to Geoff’s desk. “Geoff, can I talk to you?” he asked him.

Geoff winced at Ryan’s emotional confusion. “Make it quick,” he replied.

“It’s just that…” he paused and lowered his voice so Gavin wouldn’t be able to hear. “Gavin’s been giving me whatever thing I’d want that randomly comes to mind and it’s a little unnerving.”

“Geoff, nothing has been working!” Gavin whined from across the room, forgetting that Ryan was there.

Ryan raised his eyebrow in confusion and Geoff groaned, again, in frustration. “THAT’S IT! I’M DONE!” Geoff yelled. He grabbed Ryan and walked over to grab Gavin. he dragged both of them out of the room and dragged them to an empty conference room. “Both of your emotional/romantic confusion is giving me a headache. Don’t come out until you two are have worked something out and have sucked each other’s dicks,” he growled as he walked out of the room and slammed the door.

“What… the hell was that about…?” Ryan asked.

Gavin let out a humph. “None of this would have happened I you weren’t so bloody dense,” Gavin thought to himself.

Ryan’s eyebrow shot up. “Dense?! How am I dense?! I’m so sorry you somehow keep knowing every little thing I want and giving it to me. It kinda freaks me out!” Ryan thought in response.

“I WAS DOING IT BECAUSE I HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU, YOU BLOODY DOLT!”  

Ryan’s eyes widened. “Wow… you’re right. I am a bloody dolt. I had no idea….”

 “I read your mind to find out what you liked and bought you all those things so you would like me back…”

“Oh… while I’m not normally a fan of affections won through material goods. I do appreciate it.”

“Your welcome. Wait…” Gavin paused and looked around in bewilderment. “Did we just have a telepathic conversation because you’re a mind-reader, too?”

“It appears that that would be the case, yes,” Ryan replied.

“Bloody hell…”

“And you know, your efforts did work in a way. Because if you did ask me out, I would say yes,” Ryan thought, to give Gavin a clue.

“Oh!” Gavin said in surprise. “Would you really want to go on a date with me?”

Ryan walked over to Gavin and grabbed his hands. “Yes, I would love to go on a date with you.” Gavin squealed with joy and jumped into Ryan’s arms. “Whoa, be careful. I won’t always be able to catch you,” he said.

“Sorry, luv,” Gavin replied with a giggle.

“Hey, it’s pretty quiet in there. Have you two sorted yourselves out?” Geoff called from outside the room.

“Yep,” Gavin replied.

Geoff opened the door to see Ryan holding Gavin. “Turns out we’re both idiots,” Ryan said.

“I could have told you that,” Geoff replied with a snort.

“Yeah, turns out that he’s like me and was reading my mind to be to step ahead of me. But we worked it out and we have a date,” Gavin explained.

“Well that explains a lot. Now let’s get back to the office,” Geoff said.

The three of them walked back to the office. Nobody understood why Gavin and Ryan stared at each other so amorously for the rest of the day.

[joo-heo-n]

The Friend in Boyfriend

Genre: Fluff

Member: Minhyuk

Word Count: 3,070

a/n: Sorry for not posting the last three weeks, it has been a weird month for me. I start school on Tuesday but I have some stuff written and some that I want to get to writing, so bear with me and my absence, I promise to post whenever I get the chance :)

The Friend in Boyfriend: Changkyun / Jooheon / Shownu / Wonho / Hyungwon / Minhyuk / Kihyun

You had been working nonstop, with being new at your current job, you didn’t really have much of an input in your schedule so it was taking a while for you to adjust. It had been almost a month and even though your coworkers seemed to be inoffensive, they sure were all about gossip and roasting each other whenever it got too boring during their shifts. Which made it feel like you were caught in the middle of constant bickering and chats of people you had no idea about. It also made you a target at times, when the conversations weren’t interesting enough, you became the center of attention and all the questions went your way.

Are you going to school? What are you studying? Is this your first job? Do you drink? How old are you? Do you have a boyfriend? Maybe a girlfriend?

All those questions were the most frequent, and you didn’t mind them at all, but it was tiring to be treated as the newcomer. Even though everyone seemed to want to know about you, no one really included you in anything that was engaging enough. Which was why you decided to have lunch with Minhyuk during your break instead of moping around by your lonesome.

“Is this your first meal?” he asked, already taking a forkful of his food as he stared at you expectantly. You nodded and ate some of your own meal, savoring every chew you took because you’d have to wait another four hours to eat, before your shift was over. “Why did you skip breakfast?” Minhyuk asked in utter puzzlement, as if you had no common sense, which made you giggle to yourself and frown, “I didn’t have time, I don’t always do it” you commented, your mouth still full. Minhyuk shook his head and went for another forkful, “Don’t skip it too often, you’re going to starve by the time you get a break” he said and you nodded, taking his motherly concern. “Do you always eat by yourself?” he then asked, looking around at the other customers in the small restaurant you were in.

You smiled a little and nodded, “Yeah, I haven’t gotten friendly enough with my coworkers” you admitted and Minhyuk turned back to you. “I’ve told you, you need to be more social” he nagged and your eyes widened, “I’ve tried! They all just ask the wrong questions, you know? It sounds like they just ask things to break the ice, not because they actually care” you stated, digging into your meal once more. Minhyuk nodded and did the same, both of you small talking and eating for a few minutes until you were scraping the bottom of your plates clean.

You let your shoulders drop as you let out a sigh, “I have to get back” you said in disappointment and the two of you cleaned up and began walking back to your workplace. Minhyuk threw an arm over your shoulders and gave you a light squeeze, “You’ll be okay” he said, glancing over at you and offering you a warm smile, his lips pressed tightly together. You nodded and leaned your head towards him as he did the same with you. As soon as you were in front, you turned to him and wrapped your arms around his waist, whining a little but making the two of you chuckle as Minhyuk held you close, “Stop complaining or else you’re going to have a bad day” Minhyuk commented through a chuckle and you grinned.

He finally pulled away and patted your head, his hand trailing down your hair and tugging at the ends, “Have fun” he said, beginning to walk away while offering you a small wave, which you returned.

As soon as you turned around, you found one of your managers staring knowingly with a very obvious smirk in your direction. You snorted and went back to work as he quirked an eyebrow at you and trailed behind you, “Is that your boyfriend?” he asked curiously and you shook your head. He pointed a finger at you and chuckled, “Well he’s not just a friend, then” he commented and you nearly guffawed but resorted to shaking your head once more with a grin as the two of you went separate ways.

______________________________

You didn’t know how, but the rumor had spread so fast you didn’t even have enough time to guard yourself from the sudden questions. “How long have you been friends?” one of your coworkers asked as they worked next to you, mind you, you hadn’t interacted with this person much since you started. “Not too long, maybe a year? I’m not sure” you said with a giggle, feeling somewhat glad you finally had something to talk about with the people you worked with. Your coworker nodded and bumped shoulders with you, “The manager said it looked too friendly” he commented with a wink and you chuckled, once again shaking your head, “We’re just friends” you stated.

Another worker came towards the two of you and chimed into your conversation, “We’re getting together tomorrow for dinner, why don’t you take your friend as your plus one?” she asked and you nodded without much thought. Both exchanged glances and turned back to you, the coworker from beside you teased you with a wide grin, “So you're not denying that it's more than friends” he stated as a matter of fact and both chuckled as you shook your head. You tried playing it off coolly but you were feeling somewhat embarrassed from their teasing, so all you could manage was the shake of your head and a wave of your hand in dismissal.

The entire day you tried thinking over why exactly you had decided to invite Minhyuk. You hadn’t even given yourself a chance to mull over the idea of having him eat dinner with your coworkers, but at the same time it seemed like the perfect mistake. The fact that now everyone had an excuse to talk to you was rather pleasing, and maybe after the dinner you’d be able to get along with everyone a little more comfortably.

You made your way to Minhyuk’s doorstep and knocked gently, having him open the door almost immediately to you. You smiled brightly and stepped inside, greeting his roommates as the two of you then went to his bedroom. “How did it go?” he asked, watching you sit at the edge of his bed while he sat across from you on the chair of his small desk.

“A lot of people thought you were my boyfriend” you said, chuckling and making Minhyuk’s eyebrows raise as a small grin appeared on his lips, “Really? Why?” he asked and you shrugged. “No clue, but I told them no and they still joked about it” you said and the two of you giggled. The two of you conversed with no end, it was always nothing too crazy, simply calm talks about everything and nothing at all. You’d laugh every now and then but you soon remembered the reason for your visit.

At this point, Minhyuk was laying on your lap and scrolling through his phone as you did the same with yours, both of you sprawled across the bed. You set your phone down and disheveled Minhyuk's fringe, “Do you want to go have dinner with me tomorrow? My coworkers invited me” you asked and he glanced up at you curiously. “Is it okay if I go?” he asked and you nodded, “They want you there because they think we’re dating” you said and Minhyuk’s eyes widened slightly as he looked away, a smile appearing on his lips. “Can we pretend like we are?” he suddenly asked, sitting up and raising his hands up before him, “Hear me out, wouldn’t it be weird if you invited me as a friend but everyone says otherwise? You wouldn’t hear the end of it if you continued to claim we aren’t dating but they see me there all the time” he explained.

You stared at him in amusement and waited for him to be discouraged by your reaction and take it all back, even though you agreed with him. He grinned and chuckled, “No?” he asked, his head shaking slightly as his eyes formed crescents. You chuckled as well and nodded, “Okay” you said simply and Minhyuk held his hand out for you to shake, “Okay then, at what time?” he asked and you shook his hand, “I’ll call you an hour before” you stated and Minhyuk nodded.

He went back to his earlier position, resting his head on your lap and beginning to scroll through his phone once again.

The two of you had never tried to fake date, there had never really been an opportunity to actually take on such mischievous act. Therefore it all took some planning, and the gears in Minhyuk’s head were turning.

___________________________

“Maybe I’ll take your hand out of nowhere and just-” Minhyuk explained, taking your hand and interlocking his fingers with yours as he drove. You couldn’t help but snigger at how excited he seemed, and it made tingles run through your stomach every time he explained how either of you could initiate skinship. “You don’t have to tell me how to be a girlfriend” you said through a giggle and Minhyuk laughed, his voice squeaking a little as he tried to hold back from full on shrieking of excitement. “I’m nervous, I’m saying all of this to myself” he stated and you chuckled, giving his hand a squeeze, “Just let it happen naturally, if we try too hard it’s going to look weird” you said, making him let go of your hand as he parked and turned off the car engine.

The two of you got out of the car and as soon as you reached Minhyuk’s side, he slid his hand into yours naturally, taking you by surprise as he then guided the two of you into the small pub.

You were giggling all the way inside until you spotted the table with all your coworkers. You took in a deep breath and this time guided Minhyuk instead, waving a little as you approached the table, earning many surprised, curious, and knowing expressions. Everyone gave Minhyuk a one-take before turning their attention to you as you introduced them and they introduced their own guests to you.

The two of you sat side by side, but Minhyuk’s hand never left yours, not until you held it over his thigh and slipped your hand away from his, patting it lightly and bringing it to reach for your drink.

Halfway through the talk, Minhyuk patted your shoulder and leaned in to whisper into your ear. Of course the two of you had whispered into each other’s ear before, but you caught several eyes focus on the two of you as you did and it made you a little embarrassed. Before Minhyuk was able to say a word, you pulled away and ended up facing him, your eyes meeting his as his lips nearly brushed against yours. You could tell he was just as taken aback as you were because his lips suddenly quivered and suppressed a grin, his lips pressing together tightly as his eyes said it all. You felt your face grow hot as you quickly turned away and motioned for him to attempt to whisper whatever it was he was going to say once more.

However, Minhyuk shielded himself from a few stares as he hid behind your shoulder, and you could tell he wanted to laugh out of awkwardness. So you giggled a little yourself and patted his leg, making him come back to look at you a little more seriously as you then leaned into his ear and whispered, “Get it together” while he cleared his throat and smiled a little. Finally everyone was doing their own thing and the two of you were able to pull your act together, a new conversation beginning from one end of the table that everyone joined.

There were moments where your name was thrown into the conversation as your coworkers commented on how well you worked and what not, making Minhyuk glance over at you with a wide smile, and you assumed some pride.

After it was all over, everyone stood up and began walking out, all of you standing before each other to say your goodbyes as the night breeze brushed passed you. A few of your coworkers pulled you aside for a quick gossip, but at some point you looked around for Minhyuk and found him caught in a conversation with a few of the guys. “You’re a bad liar, Y/N” one of your coworkers said, grabbing your attention and making you turn back to her in confusion. She nodded in Minhyuk’s direction, “You were all- we’re only friends, just yesterday” she commented and another of your coworkers quirked an eyebrow at you with a grin.

You shrugged a little and smiled, glancing over at Minhyuk who you made eye contact with, making your stomach flip. It felt oddly realistic, and the idea was swarming your thoughts, making you a little scared and excited all at once.

Everyone finally said their goodbyes and you returned to Minhyuk’s side, taking his hand in yours and waving at the others as you all parted ways.

You made it to Minhyuk’s car and the two of you chatted the entire way to your apartment, bringing up the most awkward moments and funny conversations. He made it a point to let you know everyone seemed friendly and like they accepted you, and that you should be more comfortable around them from now on. It made you feel at ease, knowing that you would finally be able to eat lunch with your coworkers.

Minhyuk walked you to your doorstep and hugged you, but strangely enough, neither of you fought to pull away from each other. “Thank you” you whispered into his ear and he nodded in the crook of your neck.

______________________________

Something had changed, and you weren’t sure exactly what it was, but the two of you spent more time together than before, and the holding of hands was the smallest of your skinship. It now ranged from interlocking fingers in public places, to long hours of cuddling, limbs tangled up as the two of you watched stuff together or talked.

You were confused about what was happening between the two of you but you didn’t want it to end, and you could tell neither did Minhyuk.

As you rested your head on his shoulder, Minhyuk played a game on his cellphone, and you watched him tap furiously at the screen, making you smirk in amusement. The grass beneath you tickled your exposed legs while the both of you sat at the park, enjoying your day off from work. Minhyuk suddenly let out an exasperated sigh and looked up from his phone, dropping it at his side, “Did you lose?” you asked and he nodded bitterly as you giggled. “Good, now you can pay attention to me” you said, glancing up at him and lifting your head as he also turned to face you.

Just like the time at the dinner, the two of you were mere centimeters from each other and you felt the urge to kiss him, but something in Minhyuk’s expression made you think twice. He glanced down at your lips and almost immediately looked away, tensing up beside you, his eyes frantic and trying to find something else to distract himself with. You brought your knees to your chest and sighed a little, looking over at him and catching the way his chest rose and fell.

Was he nervous?

You smiled a little and let yourself fall on your back and placed one arm under your head. Minhyuk glanced at you and smiled, and you took the opportunity to reach for his hand and intertwine your fingers with his. He seemed hesitant, but he laid at your side and placed his arm over his forehead, giving your hand a light squeeze. You let yourself think it over for a few quiet minutes, then finally, let the courage you had been building up, guide your brain and words. “Can I tell you something serious?” you asked, not daring to look at him for a single second, because your courage was limited to words, not eye contact. Minhyuk hummed and seemed to have read your mind, because he was also avoiding having to glance at you despite the two of you laying shoulder by shoulder.

“This… doesn’t feel like a friendship anymore, huh?” you asked, and a small chuckle escaped your lips in order for you to be more at ease. Minhyuk hummed a little and chuckled as well, “Yeah, it doesn’t” he admitted and you finally turned to him momentarily as he smiled a little to himself and looked away from you. You felt yourself become excited at his reaction, because by the looks of it, there was no way this could end badly.

“Are you okay with that?” you asked, letting your thumb draw small circles on his hand. Minhyuk nodded, and it made you smile harder, because he was definitely nervous, but you knew he was just as happy as you were. “Are you?” he then asked, finally meeting your gaze, a sheepish grin across his lips as you also nodded, “Good” he said, giving your hand a light squeeze and turning away from you.

You felt your stomach flip, because it didn’t have to be made official, this meant you already were, and that was everything to you.

“Minhyuk” you said, making him turn to you curiously as you grinned and pecked his lips. As soon as you pulled away, he chased your lips and you chuckled, making him cup your face in his hands as he then kissed you back. The sensation and idea of having him do so made your heart beat so quickly in your chest, you felt a surge of excitement run through you. When he pulled away, the two of you chuckled, “I have never felt so nervous around you until now” he stated and you sniggered, “The feeling is mutual” you admitted. You’d admit anything to your coworkers now, because there was no way Minhyuk would pass as just a friend from now on.

[idontloveyoufic]

Chapter 1 - Bluebird

"There's a bluebird in my heart that wants to get out but I'm too tough for him, I say, stay in there, I'm not going to let anybody see you. " - Bluebird (Charles Bukowski)

There was an ice cold beer clutched in his hand, half empty already, and a lady to his right that had been trying to engage in a conversation about the weather for the last 15 minutes. None of that really mattered, none of that he really acknowledged.

There was only her. Her dancing and laughing and singing along to the cheesy pop songs he knew she’d never admit to liking but secretly sang along to at home when she thought no one was watching. Her and the way her hair that had been perfectly pinned back earlier was now slowly coming undone, strands framing her perfect face that had changed so much and yet so little in all this time. Her and her all consuming, breathtaking, heart shattering beauty. Her and all the memories of all the feelings that had ever been there and would always be there. God, he was so screwed. This was the “I love you” all over again, the Yale visit, the open house. He had honestly thought he had left this part of his past behind. That he was over her. He had tried over and over and it never ended with a happily ever after for him, not with her. Maybe they just weren’t meant to be. He had really thought he’d learned his lesson and yet here he was staring at her and wondering if he’d ever completely get over her or if he might be doomed to forever be in love with Rory Gilmore. “ You know if you keep staring at her any longer it’s gonna change from kinda cute to downright creepy, right ?! ” he heard his younger cousin’s voice speak up as she plopped down in the seat to his right, the weather lady had apparently gotten the hint that he was not interested in a conversation with her and had wandered off at some point. “ What do you know ? Aren’t you busy being edgy, smoking, finding yourself ? “ he replied and gave April little smirk and a friendly shove with his shoulder. She was a peculiar one his cousin, had been since the first time he’d met her but she’d done a lot of growing up over the years and had turned from a strange kid into quite the smart and witty adult, pseudo hippy phase and all. “ Haha, aren’t you funny, Jess. Seriously though, what’s up with the longing looks ? “ “ Ah you know, just figuring out that I’m still in love with the girl I dated when I was in high school. The girl that made me change into the person I am today. The girl that is the sole reason I became a better person. “ Is what he thought but there was no way in hell Jess would ever talk about his feelings. Ever. “ Don’t know what you’re talking about. “ “ Sure you don’t. Just sayin’ you could go over there and actually talk to her instead of glaring a hole through her head.” That he could do, but what would he say ? “Hey Rory, sorry to interrupt but I just realized that part of me is still madly in love with you. “ ? “ Oh hi there Rory, been watching you all night wondering if we ever stood a chance, wondering if we still might stand one. Wondering if this could ever be us, getting married and all that. “ ? Those were the things that were ghosting through his head but he’d be damned if he ever told those to anyone, especially Rory. He’d tried that before, multiple times, and look how that turned out. To be fair one of those times he ran off, but that was only that one time. No, there really wasn’t anything he could tell her that would change anything about this situation. She had enough on her plate as it was, she was writing a book for god's sake and if anyone knew how stressful and chaotic that time is, it was Jess. The last thing she’d need was him bringing up old feelings and confusion. “ There’s nothing to talk about. “ “ Okay, James Dean. I know that whole repressing your emotions deal runs in the family and works well with the grumpy mysterious guy image you’re trying to maintain but that needs to stop. You’re clearly still into this girl and I’m not gonna sit here and watch you throw away what might be your last shot at your epic love story. “ “ Oh Jesus when did you start getting so corny. Does Lorelei make you watch 80s romcoms when you’re over at their place ? Does Luke know she’s doing this to you ? “ “ Jess, I’m serious. Sometimes you gotta fight for the things you want. “ For the first time in a while Jess left his gaze drift from Rory and turned towards his cousin. “ I’m 33 years old, April. I’m done fighting over girls, fighting for girls. Things either work out or they don’t and they obviously didn’t for me and her. “ “ But what if you’re her Luke ? “ “ What if I’m not ? What if I don’t want to be ? I don’t want her to settle for me after years and years of trying. I want to be a conscious decision. For once in my life I want someone to chose me. Not because of a feeling of guilt or nostalgia or comfort or because they feel like they owe me or because they feel responsible. I’m done with this. I can’t do it all over again. “ A silence settled upon them as neither of them really knew where those words had suddenly come from. If there was one thing you didn’t except from Jess Mariano it was as sudden outburst of honest emotions. “ Okay. “ “ Okay ? “ “ Okay, I get it. I didn’t mean to push you to do something you don’t want to do. I just wanted to help. I want you to be happy. “ “ I am happy. “ “ Are you ? “ Was he ? Yeah. Sure. Truncheon was going well, he liked his job, liked his coworkers, his friends. He had his own little apartment & his own car. He was in the process of coming up with ideas for a second book. He wasn’t particularly phased by the fact that he’d been single for a while now either. Whenever he felt like it Jess had no problem sweet talking a girl at a bar. Girls, he had found out a while ago, were totally into the broody writer persona. Was he truly happy though ? He didn’t know. “ Yeah. “ “ Okay. “ “ Look, April. You know I’m not big on the whole family reunion stuff, especially here in Stars Hollow where half the population still holds a grudge against me. I came for Luke but he and Lorelei ran off a while ago so there’s really no harm in me leaving too, right ? “ It was the truth, Jess wasn’t particularly thrilled about returning to the Connecticut town he’d spend some time in as a teenager, but there was no way in hell he could’ve said no to Luke. The man had done more for him than anyone in his entire life, his mom included. He’d been one of the few who’d believed in him when even Jess himself had almost lost hope that he’d ever amount to something. He owed Luke so much and showing up to his wedding was the least he could do. “ You’ve been drinking. “ “ Last bus is leaving in 20 minutes. “ “ To Philly ? That’s a long ass drive, Jess. Are you sure you don’t wanna crash at the apartment above Luke’s and leave tomorrow ? “ “ I got a book with me, it’ll be fine. No offense April, but if I don’t leave now I’m just getting sucked back into things that I should’ve left behind a long time ago.” “ What about your car ? “ “ I was thinking, maybe my favorite cousin would like to come visit me in Philadelphia before she goes back home, and maybe she could bring my car with her? “ April stared at him for a moment and Jess could see the gears turning in her head, trying to come up with an idea to get him to stay. His mind was made up though, if he’d stay he’d have to get drunk and if there was one place Jess Mariano didn’t want be drunk at, it was the town center of Stars Hollow with his ex girlfriend in close proximity. “ Alright “ April said and let out a defeated sigh “ Be careful and don’t talk to any sleazy looking guys. “ “ Yeah okay, mom. “ Jess replied and took a last sip on his now empty bottle of beer. As he got up off the chair, Jess’ glance wandered back over to Rory. He could go after her, fight for her, show her the man he was today and how this was all for her. He could. But he didn’t. Because he was scared ? Maybe. But also because he was just tired. Tired of running after the same girl over and over again. Always failing. “ Just so you know, I don’t think you’re doing the right thing. Just running from your emotions. “ April spoke up. “ Well cousin, I don’t think you’re doing the right thing getting your nose pierced and acting like a pothead when they could probably sell you oregano without you noticing. Yet here I am, accepting your decisions. “ “ You’re an ass. “ April responded as a small smirk tugged at the corners of her lips. “ That’s family. Thought you’d be used to that by now. Seriously though, don’t worry about me kid. “ “ That’s family, Jess. We always worry. Thought you’d be used to that by now “ She replied with a smile before walking away, back into the sea of Stars Hollow residents that were singing and dancing to some obscure 90s popsong. This family, his family, was quite honestly a mess. It was a family though, something he hadn’t had for the longest time. And no matter how strange or broken over overly intrusive or annoying they were, they meant the world to him. Because they were his people and to them, to Luke and April he was a conscious decision. It was their decision to care and to worry and Sometimes you gotta admit defeat. With one last look towards Rory, the girl that changed it all, Jess turned his back towards the gazebo covered in dozens of fairy lights and the quirky town that surrounded it and took on the walk towards the bus stop. Maybe April was right and he was just running from his emotions and his crippling fear of rejection. But so what ? Sometimes you gotta let yourself be scared to save yourself from pain. Sometimes you gotta run.

So this a little introduction really. The plot will pick up in the next few chapters. Please go easy on me and if you feel like it leave me a comment on what you thought of this pseudo prologue. 

This is NOT literati 

xx Jo

[hippieeloquent]

Birthday Cupcakes

All the pieces depends on time of day for the best cupcakes near me and how much mild is needed. Lets not child ourselves, while they just like the individual youre throwing the get together for, the concept of free meals through the work day is normally the primary attraction. While chocolate cake or ice cream cake is one of the best ways to seem to get your kid's birthday, why not change issues with a number of scrumptious cakes? Utilizing this recipe, you'll be capable of make twelve scrumptious cupcakes in about forty minutes. All in all they are so cute and delicious each visitor will clamor to have one. If I give you one which sounds plausible, I might write about it. As most parties come with a buffet setting, it is feasible to put an attractively designed cake in the middle as a centrepiece. Step 3: Place a mini cupcake on the toothpick within the center. As I seen the gloss fade and the structure knit together underneath the oven’s heat on every cupcake top, I considered the end of a journey, the fruition of my year-long problem to myself. W1totalk - Thanks. Glad you like this filled cupcake recipe. I used the recipe from my new Primrose Bakery cookbook.

Hope you give this a try…it's easy and a enjoyable solution to jazz up cupcakes to your next birthday party! It is enjoyable and festive. They're really easy to make and fun to do at the same time. Recent, shiny crimson strawberries are a healthy fruit that may be grown in a garden or proper at home inside of a jar. Fruit cakes can even be purchased a number of months prior to the wedding, as they've an extended shelf life. Our celebrations cakes and cupcakes make a formidable centrepiece at any event. Cool Cute Cupcakes for a Pool Social gathering! There's a whole vary of cookie and cupcakes recipes obtainable on the internet, should you want to try some distinctive flavors. Consider offering several flavors of ice cream. In a large bowl, cream margarine with sugar till mild and fluffy. In massive bowl, cream shortening/lard and butter with electric mixer, first on a low velocity to blend then on a high speed to whip. Give them miniature spatulas or small, blunt butter knives for the frosting and switch them loose on the decorations.

Slowly I teetered my manner again to my desk, utilizing all of my previous waitress balancing expertise, only to be interrupted by a shifting fist of secret service and coworkers with their phones all out snapping pics. Video games: Aggressive games are the best approach to get all of the company engaged and excited. The message I’m making an attempt to convey to these of you who're at the moment engaged on posting challenges is, even should you fall down, get again up and check out once more. Colors are beloved by all of the kids and even those who usually are not so inventive will probably be tempted to try out some crafts, as soon as they handle to lay their hands on a coloration box. Sure, and the quantity will likely be the identical. I feel fondant shall be Much simpler! This puzzle will appeal to all of the cupcake lovers on the market! People have accepted the style and this is the explanation why there may be mass scale manufacturing of muffins.

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[in-the-midst-of-everything]

Hey today was one fuck of a day!!!

Idk if I should bitch about it first or talk about yesterday, cuz yesterday was pretty good. But damn. Today just fucking sucks. I think I will do that first cuz ending with happy thoughts sounds like a better idea. And I gotta get this off my chest.

So we went to biolife yesterday and couldn't donate, so we both loaded up on iron and tried again today. Nothing. Both of us got turned away for one point below safe iron levels. Idk how?? I usually have good luck with donating, only if I haven't eaten enough I get turned away, but I had plenty of food in the prior 24 hours, ate a bowl of toasty-o's (80% daily iron value???) Which usually does the trick but nah. A wasted trip up to point, planned on coming home with $50 in gas money but NOPE. Now I'm down to 13 (?) on my biolife card and $75 to my name otherwise. That's it. That's all I got. So much for getting my shit sorted out in 2k18 cuz I am waaaaaaaaaaay behind on that plan. I have money coming from uncle Tim and Kathy, plus 2 art commissions I need to kick my ass into gear for, so I'll be ok but FUCK man. It's fucking July in a week and I'm STILL fucking scraping by

And I am PISSED at Sharon but I don't know how to tell her cuz I've been trained out of being confrontational my entire life and I don't wanna lose my damn job cuz she's been an absolute bitch lately. But I'm STILL getting half fucking paychecks cuz I guess I'm still paying off the forwarded money from this winter, I wasn't aware this would be going halfway the fuck into summer, I've drained my savings paying bills and fixing my fucking car I have next to nothing left. I can't buy food. I can't buy alcohol to cope, I can't do literally anything cuz I'm motherfucking broke. I was supposed to have money saved up to take the cats to the vet, get my motorcycle liscence and start looking for a bike, save money for a road trip this fall, but fuck ALL of that cuz I'm cruzing through the year by skin of my teeth.

And the big kicker, the motherfucking cherry on top, I haven't been getting my full 40 each week. Sharon has some kind of crisis going on that she's watching her money, so I missed 5 hours last week cuz she didn't have anything for me to do??? Bull fucking SHIT there is SO MUCH that needs to be done around that fucking place but she sent me home. ON TOP OF cutting my summer hours from 10/day to 9.5 to 9.75. Which isn't a huge change but really???? Just. WHY.

And I also mentioned she's been damn near unbearable all year so far, everything I thought she wanted from me is flipped now. I started clocking in right from the start 5 mins early. Cuz she specifically sat me down and told me last year she hated me being there on the dot, that I could punch in 5 mins early. Well now I guess I clock out early too, "just in case you go over time". Which is easy enough to fucking fix, just clock out sooner next day BUT WHATEVER. IDFK SHARON.

And I didn't say anything when she first told me this shit cuz I can't process information that fast and what it means on my end so I just agree on the spot and fuck myself over.

SO. I went into work today an hour later by her request, after a whole morning of low key panicking about money and doing the nasty ass dishes. She left almost immediately after showing me what to clean up by the big garage, and after I washed the rtv I fucked off and sat in the office with Holly for an hour. Cuz I needed someone to talk to, just bs with and not anything important. And it was pretty good. I had developed a migraine on the way home from point and chilling out in the office helped it. I spent the next 7 hours weed whacking the shit outta the mess around the big garage, pulling water line tubing from the matted grass, and organizing the trash into a burn pile and pick up pile. It sped time along really fast actually, and I was actually pretty ok for most of the day, aside from itchy, sweaty and frustrated. I cleaned the bathrooms at 10 and sat around wasting time for a bit to push my time to midnight to make the most out of my night, and on the walk back to put my shit away 2 things happened.

1st Sharon texted me at 11:40 asking if I was still cleaning bathrooms. Fucking yes, I have til midnight and I came in late, I'm not going over time in anyway ffs.

2nd one of Rome's buddies caught me on my way past and asked me over for a shot of his long island iced tea, which ofc I accepted. It was good, I haven't had hard liquor in so long it was actually really good. He asked what I was up to and told me about how Sharon busted them last night at 1am having fun in the camper. Cuz it was past "quiet time". On a Friday night, really Sharon? God, no fun allowed. He offered me a ride back to put my cleaning shit away, and I mentioned that I had to clock out and head home. Immediately after getting in my car I thought wtf, I should've made better conversation?? Like, at least act like I would hang around if they invited me, cuz I totally would, I've been so socially deprived lately it's not even funny. But I didnt??? I just was like....ya...I'm headed home. And he didn't push, but like. Idk. It all boils down to I have a paranoia about my image at the campground. As stupid as that sounds. But I'm literally always doing manual labor, usually focused on a job or have headphones as earplugs in so I can't talk (not that Sharon would let me anyway) and I leave right after I clock out cuz no one invites me over cuz I don't talk to anyone. Like I feel like my presence there isn't impacting literally anyone, I'm just the Employee That Does Work and that's it. And this paranoia was cemented recently when I finally followed the Facebook page, saw how often she updates and all the pics and videos she uses have like, Bill and Holly and other campers in them, she was showing off the jump pad and stuff and like...that wouldn't be there without me. I spent days digging the fucking trench for the electric line by hand, AFTER clearing the field and leveling the plot. AND I helped roll it out and set it up. Like idk I feel like I do all the hard work but don't get to join in any of the fun? And it just feels really shitty when none of your work is acknowledged. And going back to my intial(?) point, I'm so socially deprived and downright //lonely//. And I feel bad saying it cuz Hope and I live together, we're literally always sharing space together but I feel like I have no one else. Kenzie's barely existing being dragged down by work and money stress, I try to stay in close touch but it's hard. And out of this circle? Nothing. Kenzie has Dan and her coworkers to talk to, Hope is constantly on discord talking to the chat there, she tells me all about that. And I have...no one else. I message my sisters frequently but they're both insanely busy. I'm seeing Nikki and Cassy on Wednesday to help them move, but despite Nikki and I really hitting it off we don't actually talk regularly and that kinda makes me sad. But I'm conflicted there too, I'll rant in another post about that.

And idk. I'm just so. Genuinely. Lonely. I have no one to go see (not that I'd have the fucking time lmao) no one to talk to, starting new aquaintenceships is exhausting as all hell, and when I'm not around Hope I'm alone with my own thoughts. I've always been a loner, I'm comfortable in my own company and I can have fun by myself...but it's really taking a toll on me. Especially since Hope and kenzie seem like they can't keep up with me. I'm ready to do almost anything, anytime, but Hope needs several days' warning to do anything big and kenzies always tired. We managed a friend day out a couple weeks ago, we went out to Rabbit rock and I could've explored and climbed for another 2 hours, but their legs hurt and it was hot out, and they headed back to the car while I was still on the rock. There was plenty of daylight left and I would've loved to visit the woods or go hang at the lake, but we ended up heading back home and chilling at the apartment. Which was fine. I wasn't mad or anything, I just wanted more outside time. I miss the excitement, the sense of adventure. Kenzie and I made it out to the woods once this spring, and we didn't even wander. We just drove out to scope out the trails and left. And it's getting so hard to hang out in general, our work schedules never align and we're all broke af. I'm so exausted. I'm sick and tired of working our asses off but not getting ahead. We're all fucking behind yet despite all our efforts, it's just not good enough.

I came home tonight with all these thoughts knocking around in my head and doing all I could to hold back tears. Immediately grabbed my 2 beers from the fridge and got in the shower, tried to relax myself and drown out some of the panic, but it's not feeling like it's working. I'm just mildly dizzy Andy headaches coming back from crying. Idk what to do anymore. I have plans for once in my life but even the simplest goals are continuously just out of reach. I tell myself to just keep rolling with it, try to build momentum and you'll get there eventually. But I'm so far from making any headway. I'm keeping my head up but it's getting so, so hard....

[son-of-a-duck]

January 5, 2017

This morning I woke up and the guys on the radio said there wasn't much snow on the ground, like maybe an inch.  They apparently get to work very early and have no access to windows because when I looked there was well over an inch.

This presented a bit of a problem because maybe my tires need changing.  I had absolutely no traction.  Once I turn onto the main road by my house there is a big hill.  Turning onto the main road was a bit sketchy but I made sure there weren't any cars behind me and that the ones in front were far in front so I wouldn't have to worry about having to stop halfway up the hill and then not being able to start up it again.  When I turned onto the next side street it was back to a lot of wheel spinning and minor fishtailing.  I couldn't tap the gas light enough to avoid spinning out.  After parking at the dentist's office I looked at my tires they were completely packed with snow and ice.  So I was basically driving on ice skates.

I should have canceled my dentist appointment because they told me what they always tell me.  My teeth look great.  My gums look great. Keeping doing what I'm doing.

On my way home I tried using the manual shift option on my car.  I think it was my first time using it on purpose.  I think most automatic cars have Drive and then a couple other lower gear options but mine just has the manual shift option.  Getting out of the parking lot I kept it in first and second gear.  I got adventurous and bumped it up to third on the side street.  I went back to full auto on the main street until I got to the hill near my house and then left it in second going down the hill so I wouldn't have to use my brakes.  I felt a lot safer doing that.

With the rest of my morning I watched more Madoka Magica and played more Farming Simulator 15.  I finally had enough money to buy the corn-harvesting header for my combine, so I did and went to the store to get it.  Then I spent at least twenty minutes harvesting my corn field.  One of the reasons it took so long is because my trailer isn't very big so I had to take multiple trips to go sell it.

I believe it was on my last trip to sell grain, right after unloading it, that the power blinked and my computer shut off.  When I got everything turned back on and got back into the game I learned that I apparently hadn't saved in awhile.  I was standing at the spawn point without a tractor because it was up at the grain place.  When I ran down to my field, all the corn was still there, not harvested, and my combine did not have the corn-harvesting header on it.  Good grief. I had to run all the way back to the grain place to get my tractor, then re-bought the header and drove to the store to pick it up, and then started to harvest the corn for the second time.  It made a tedious job enough more tedious.  I did learn that there is invisible corn, however, so that's a plus.  Even when there aren't any cornstalks visible, if there are dark, shadow-looking spots, there's corn there.

Before heading to work I swept off half of my front porch and the steps so that when my box of food was delivered the UPS guy wouldn't have to leave it in the snow.

Work was a slow and quiet day.  I finalized the handout for the class next week.  I added in the XKCD comic about passwords, as well as links to the random word list and random number generator, along with a screenshot of how I used the random number generator.

I sent an email to all the patrons coming to the class, or at least started the email.  The librarian who will be teaching the class composed most of it because she knew what she wanted to say and she wanted to say it in her own style.  It was basically a helpful reminder for the patrons attending that they should have access to their email address, especially if they need to create a Facebook account, and they should bring pictures if they want to upload pictures.  We also asked them to send in any questions they would like answered during the class.  Hopefully they all read the email. At least one person did and wrote back with a question that was way beyond the scope of the glass.  The librarian responded, basically saying as much, and told her about the one-on-one tech trainer and the tech drop-in times.  Which means I should probably start researching the question just in case.

Tonight I spent most of the evening talking with my coworker.  When we work together, especially closing, we end up spending a lot of the time talking about video games and other random tech things.  It was good tonight because I really didn't have anything I needed to do. Or was willing to do.  I made a post on our building-wide job talking about the upcoming classes and workshops and included a picture of the schedule.  This was the idea of one of the other librarians and I think it was a good one.  Now the other staff around the building will have an idea of what is coming up in case they get a question from a patron or see a patron need that can be met by one of the classes or workshops.

The two older ladies were back today.  They were there when I got to work at noon and I have no reason to believe they hadn't been there since we opened.  And they were there as we closed, like they have been several times over the last two weeks.  I could still hear them upstairs with five minutes to go so I went up and my coworker was trying to urge them along.  While he turned to help one of them get her flash drive the other logged back into the computer and started typing a new document because she wanted to print it out.  My coworker and I both started protesting at the same time and told her she didn't have time and needed to log off.  They were still picking up things as the final announcement went off and I headed downstairs to do a final walkthrough.  I joked the other day with my coworkers that we needed to block off the bathrooms because the go-to of these ladies is to be there until we actually close and then go into the bathroom for at least another five minutes.  Tonight the custodian actually put a sign on the door saying there was a leak in the first floor women's restroom and locked the door.  It worked perfectly because they couldn't get in and had to resign themselves to actually leaving.

When I got home there was not one but two boxes on my porch.  One was obviously my food.  It was packaged really well.  Each meal was in its own small box, which were located inside a thermal bag thing along with two big ice packs.  This must be a winning combo because even though it had sat on my porch for five hours, nothing was frozen.  There are a couple ingredients I'm not going to use, like the kale for the soup, or the olives for the flatbread, but I'm excited to try the different meals.

The other box was the space heat with the 3D virtual fireplace effect that my mom ordered the other day and that she let me pay for.  Much like the ladder it was also a pain in the butt to get out of the box. One of the leading reasons for finding a significant other at the moment is that so I have someone to hold boxes as I try to get crap out of them.  I did eventually manage it, got the legs screwed on, and got it plugged in.  I like it.  It seems solidly built, it looks nice, and the flame effect is pretty cool.  So far I am pleased.

When I got the food put away and the heater put together I hoped into Farming Simulator 15 and recorded today's audio journal.  It ended up lasting over thirty minutes, which is surprising.  And now after writing all this it feels a bit like deja vu.  Such is my life now.  I am enjoying recording the audio journal and I hope I keep it up this time.

Now I am going to go to bed because it is half past midnight and I'm tired.  My goal for tomorrow was to not leave the house but I apparently have a urologist appointment tomorrow afternoon.  I thought I had one coming up but didn't realize it was so soon.  At least it is in the afternoon.  I haven't had a kidney stone in quite awhile now, so I kind of feel like canceling the appointment but it can't hurt just to check in.  I'll probably end up going.