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#i kinda wanna know what the fuck this means lol
aroaceofthesea · 5 months
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How the fuck am i supposed to make 16.50 double crochets💀💀💀
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skitskatdacat63 · 1 month
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#lol i love seeing just straight up bullying on tiktok(/s)#someone(im guessing) went into a discord server for proshipping#and then posted their face reveals on tiktok!?!??!?!#basically saying: look how ugly and weird they look#like what the fuck#just bcs you dont agree with someones opinion ON SHIPPING#doesnt mean you should blast them on socmed?#they posted those pics in a trusted space :(#why are people so cruel and vindictive nowadays#people who make it their whole personalities to shit on pros OR antis are so embarrassing#just keep to yourself and keep your personal moral highground you know?#like they go low we go higher etc#cause on tiktok people will post very bait proshipper tiktoks#to the point where i honestly think they're 100% antis who just wanna sow discourse and disgust#like when i see those people im like just ignore them???#just dont engage man. you end up encouraging people to do worse and worse just to cause drama#but yeah antis in return will make all their posts 'correcting' these obv bait posts#like both of you get a life and just do things that make you happy. not things that obv upset you#idk it kinda sickens me how much time people devote to activities that clearly doesn't make them happy#even if youre pleased about dunking on people you morally disagree w +#wouldnt you feel happier engaging with content that yknow. fills you with genuine enjoyment?#not enjoyment fueled by disgust or morally superiority#idk some people feel like children so i shouldnt care too deeply. but the amnt of toxic behavior is so disturbing to me#the posting of faces got on my nerves badly. no matter if you disagree with someone#you shouldnt just straight up expose their face on your big acct BECAUSE OF DIFFERENCES IN SHIPPING OPINION#and the fact that the point is to imply they're all ugly. so fucking childish and disgusting#i reported but idk if that'd do anything. i wish i could have an honest dialog w people like that tbh#catie.rambling.txt
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pup-pee · 10 months
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i have artblock
the 1st drawings r recent(when i get artblock i just try 2 study anatomy idk)
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transcript;
bernard; ok, so, listeners ask; jay, how is ur hair not damnaged? what deal did u have 2 make?
bernard; yeah whats ur secret?
jay; would u believe asian magic?
bernard(@ the same time); i mean how can we b sure-
jay; ber-
bernard; wait-
jay; ber!
bernard; wait! yk what i meant!
(thers a jump here bc i was 2 lazy 2 draw)
jay; im coming out again; ive been exposed. my hair is actually from my deal w/batman whos actually the devil
bernard; shup up shut up shut up omg
jay; 50 video special ill b cursing ber. get ready!
baernard; i h8 q n as
#srry 2 bernard who i made look a lil stupid kinda not rlly#he wasnt talking about jays hair @ all#by the “how can we b sure” he means in a “how can we bsure u havent made a deal?”#bernard dowd#jay nakamura#dc#“y did u make this?”#IM SRRY IM SO TIRED OF PPL QUESTIONING ASIAN HAIR PLS#“how is ur hair not burnt off?” “shouldnt u use less?” “is that ur real hair color?” “is ur hair real?”#hcing jay as having anime protagonist hair tho#cause i wanna b silly#2 any1 whos ever touched my hair trying 2 change it & ive told u “yeah thats not gonna work” & THEN U DID IT ANYWAYS FUCK U#im a lil angry lol srry#do ppl not know what poc ppl look like @ all or?????????#no cause ive been complimented on my “tan”...#its just my natural skintone wtf so u mean? i spend all day inside IM PALE AF WDYM TAN????#im ranting in the hastags LMAO GRRRRRRRRR#i just get rlly fed up w/just things i think#fksdlhgkjs idk wanna vent but i think i accidentally did a wiwltte whoops#oh “y did u make this” i wanted 2 color bernards hair lol#its such a dyable color!!!!!!!#colour??#WHICH WAY DO U SPELL IT????? THEY BOTH LOOK FINE 2 ME#ive been eating bread slices its pretty good#puppeeart#yeah im just trying 2 like fill out the tags again bc i think its fun#weeeeeeeeeee#every1 eat potato bread its fluffy & cheap(@ least where i live)#also screw my mom 4 living in la 4 a bit & giving me some of her valley accent actually#how dare u!!!!!(its entirely my fault bc i pick up ppls accents all the time klfdhsjkhf)
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hecksupremechips · 7 months
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The best feeling in the world is when there’s a piece of media you know you love and you’ve hyped it up as your favorite thing for so long but you haven’t revisited it in a while so you start to worry if it’s really as good as you make it out to be and so you go back and revisit it and it’s like. Oh this is even better than I remembered this shit rules
#the klock keeps ticking#i always get this feeling when i play 999 but tonight i got it with the letter#cuz ive uh finally decided to bite the bullet and play the evil meanie route where everyone dies 😟#a route ive put off for so long cuz its just too damn sad to think about akjdksk god it hurts#and ive played like for the most part every route of this game EXCEPT this one but i know the ending is really dark and i need to see it#plus i will at least get my beloved torture scene in so thats nice#i didnt kill off isabella though its a coma route which i hope still allows me to get the ending i want cuz i mean shell still be out of#commission in the final scene so hopefully it works out#but yeah no i started off tonight on the marianne chapter and while i did skip around through it cuz ive played it many times and i just#wanna get to the important stuff already alskj i also just replayed some of the best parts#aka the shit where lorraine appears and the gay shit alksks and god like hnnnghh not only does this chapter still ruin me emotionally#i also just remembered why i love this character so much and remembered just how good the character writing in this game is#and i also played into the rebecca chapter and didnt skip as much cuz i actually am not as familiar with the coma route#cuz it makes me sad and i never revisited it lol and i havent gotten to The Scene that makes me sob yet#its so coming though dont worry but idk i guess its just been cuz ive been thinking about p3 so much lately#and in particular shinji both the death route and coma route but in particular the coma cuz thats what im writing#and damn lol the letter just writes the grief and nuanced relationships and death stuff so much better lol god#like marianne loses her childhood best friend whom she has a gay ass relationship with to suicide and like its just better#she blames herself and still isnt even kinda okay with it after 13 years#like it just fucking ruined her and the only thing keeping her from losing it is her repression and drinking problem and unattached sex#and then with coma route well fucking first off isabellas friends actually like. visit her frequently damn#and they just all have such unique ways of coping like Zach is being optimistic so no one gets too upset#rebecca is sorta in charge of making sure everything goes smoothly she has to contact the family and make big decisions#and shes also just taking the most stress and shes got so many complicated feelings around isabella going on but she genuinely cannot stand#that isabella is hurt shes fucking destroyed she loves isabella and then ashton AAAAA god yeah i also just remembered that hes SUCH a good#character hes like being a genuine asshole right like Rebecca calls to tell him that isabella is comatose now and he literally doesnt let#her say anything he literally says ‘i dont have time for other things rn’ like the wellness of his friend is just ‘other things’#but you just know thats not it not at all hes burying himself in work to the point of destruction so he can figure out who did this and make#everything okay and he refuses to show even an ounce of vulnerability cuz THE SECOND HE DOES IT ALL COMES OUT AND HE CANT GET OUT OF BED#ANYMORE CUZ HOW IS HE SUPPOSED TO BE OKAY WHEN THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE IS DYING
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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Being high energy while sick feels insane. Like my brain is telling me I should lay down and rest but is also telling me I should run around in circles and break things.
#i think im getting better tho. i mean i still can feel my warped sickyness but idk my hormones maybe have me all fucked up#but like i told my mum i get these insane little hypomanic-esque episodes and she was immediately like could b ur hormones#i know a number of ppl like that. and i was like YES. thats obviously what it is but nothing comes up when i try to google things abt it#so there must b others out there. and it also implies that theres sometimes fucked up about my serotonin receptors bc when im like kinda#positively disregard i feel happy and i never feel happy. my typical emotional state is indifferent and apathetic#and then dips into light misery and very miserable but not like clinically depressed. but i was even like that while on vacation so even#removed from the stresses in my life i still am not happy. which is y its so hard when ppl r like do what makes up happy. relax#and im like. ok but like nothing works??? its either fucked up hormones or my lantent anxiety just keeps me from being happy#but whatever. im gathering so much data. when i go see a doctor im gonna pull out a spreadsheet and graphs and notes like a lunatic#bwahhh i wanna run. i have too much energy. fuck being sick. fuck having to work on a day off. fuck this#also fuck my menstrual cycle for being so short. like so short its sometimes not listed with the healthy range but only sometimes#just to make me think. i should probably talk to a doctor but. like its probably fine. its consistent so its fine#annoying. annoying. got u can tell when out of wack bc i post too much and cant shut thr fuck up lol#unrelated
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lesbiansanemi · 5 months
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I spoke too soon I should have known that was too easy for him I’m so tired I was like hey! I might have found someone interested in subleasing, if they end up not wanting to ill start making posts places but either way, ill need a move in date to advertise and tell people. Do you have any estimates of when you might find a place yet?
And my fucking roommate replies with a bunch of links to apartments like well you could move HERE like fuck you fuck you fuck you jackass this wasn’t what we agreed on and also 90% of the places he sent me were places I already contacted and had no availability/a waitlist/couldn’t sign until august and the other 10% were WAY out of my price range also none of this solves that I don’t want to sign a new fucking lease cuz I want out of this fucking fuck ass city between you and your bf you make almost TRIPLE what I do you will have such an easier time finding a new place and moving plus you wanna stay in this stupid fucking fuck ass city just fucking GET OUT
#i am genuinely starting to hate this dipshit#I get moving sucks!#but also this is all YOUR fault so YOU should get the shittier end of the deal sorry not sorry#also me living on my own means I will go from about 600 dollars of extra income s month#to about 200 to fucking ZERO depending on what the rent is#how about you kill yourself#‘I’m not trying to make this harder for you’#you are actively fucking me over in sooooo many fucking ways dude because you are incapable of considering other human beings#he also has less bills than me?????#like motherfucker doesn’t even have a car payment cuz his mom GAVE him a car be fucking for real#he’s spent his whole life pretty much kinda jusy doing whatever he wants and getting whatever he wants#and it’s reallyyyyyyy starting to fucking show with this situation#GOD#I told him that doesn’t work for me and explained why to him AGAIN#and he has no answered so lol we’ll see#he was also like ‘but you’ll still have to live with someone you don’t know and you didn’t want that 🥺🥺’#like oh my god#yeah in an ideal world! no! I wouldn’t be doing that#but the issue wasn’t literally living with some guy I don’t know#it was being walked all over and treated like shit and not considered#nor was I asked about it lol like now I’m seeking a new roommate I was never doing that when you moved him in so I wasn’t prepared for it#fuck you for all of a sudden acting like you care about what’s ‘best for me’#and that it’s living alone when it quite literally fucking isn’t for so many reasons#you just don’t wanna fucking move and are scrambling now that I’m actually enforcing this#kysssssssssssss#kaz rambles
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widevibratobitch · 6 months
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#im so tired of this lalalalalalalalaa#something is Wrong lol#i really need this therapy on wednesday but guess WHAT im not going. im going to a funeral instead 🤡#and ill be singing in that stupid fucking church because have to but i dont fucking wanna i hate doing it and i hate churches#all i feel rn is the overwhelming urge to selfdestruct and like obv im not gonna kms now#but im so fucking angry that im not even *allowed* to do that anymore. like it was such a comfort all this time to know that i can just Quit#and now i cant because guess what someone has to take care of my mother 🫠 and im so fucking tired of being someone people depend on#to handle THEIR feelings and THEIR emotions and just take it all with humility and acceptance and kindness and never snap and bite back#like i dont WANNA hear about your dead husband i dont wanna hear about your stupid fucking boyfriend#i dont wanna hear about the new guy/girl who's hitting on you because you're so hot and perfect#i dont wanna be responsible for how people feel. i should just shut up and take it and be humble and never ask or expect anything back#but when is it MY turn to call at 1 am crying about how im tired and want to kms#or to start expecting shit of people and allow myself to get properly angry at them for not meeting those expectations#or to braggingly 'complain' about something the other person clearly lacks without any consideration for their feelings#or to just openly cry and say deeply personal shit without any filter not caring if that other person is clearly uncomfortable af#because *i* need it right now and i need someone to listen and let them worry about how to even respond to that stuff#im just so tired of people expecting shit of me im tired of being made responsible even tho i clearly cannot handle that responsibility#i wanna be mean i wanna snap and get angry and openly say that i dont give a shit and am tired and cant listen to this rn#but i cant because i have to be a motherfucking mother theresa and never dare to demand something for myself#and idk where that comes from. idk if it's coming from the fanatic catholicism of my childhood or my mother or just from myself and idc#i just feel so horrible and guilty and wrong for wanting anything for myself#and it once again feels like im making myself the victim and the tortured martyr here when i should just shut up and take it#i just wanna lie down and die and not care about who'll get angry or judge or blame me for it im tired and i dont know what to do#i want someone to take care of ME and reassure ME and make ME feel like i matter and that they really will help me if i ever need it#and that they'd be kinda sad if i were gone not because i had a role to fulfill that i failed at by killing myself but because i am a person#<- math calculations flying around my head as i come to the terrible realisation#of just why exactly im so deeply obsessed with my voice teacher (aside from her being literally the most beautiful woman alive lol) 🤡#like babygirl stop being so utterly overwhelmingly kind to me my knees are weak i would do anything for you queen and I MEAN IT
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floorpancakes · 2 years
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i refuse to let clamp off the hook for underutilising himawari's fucking fascinating character setup and traits but on a less serious level im obsessed with the concept of her as an instigator of chaos.
like she's way less airheaded than she seems and it doesn't come off like Default Airhead Girl Behaviour or even Default Girl Companion That Ships Her Friends primarily (like not as hard as some other series by comparison I mean she's very I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE by default) specifically she just seems like someone that thoroughly enjoys being a little shit in a sincere way and giggling at her dumbass friends and has a shade of high emotional intelligence about it all. like she's just girl of all time. she's i don't know where im going with this just take this low effort meme from when i watched the holic stage play on youtube this isn't a coherent thought it's like 2am ill come up with better thoughts later
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#ive seen kaguya sama and i know chika is a little bit rotted as a human being but we need to think about himas agent of chaos potential#this is all my personal intepretation but in general i find her a very cool character and working with the barebones framework is still fun#shes got so many interesting character traits#like how shes totally hooked on horror and spooky stuff more than the guys#but it has a distinct contrast with her deep fucking trauma and daily struggles with her curse-but-not-cause#theres smth that feels part coping mechanism part catharsis and part just straight up gap moe abt that#like....girl of all time#also her being depicted a lot either in rly bright sunny tones OR gothic lolita and no inbetween#i mean the joy of holic is everyone is basically posable dolls dressed up in whatever outfits you want but like its still a theme#and like we are given tidbits and small bits and pieces of her personality and interests and its not enough but its rly cool to think abt#they underused her frfr but what we do learn in how she reacts to stuff and bounces off other characters is so AAA#its wild how shes kinda a main character but kinda not in such a deeply fleshed out character driven story#i know shes a key player w loads of strong emotional moments but shes overshadowed a lot and it makes me wanna write mad headcanons#i find myself wondering how she copes day to day with her situation and how itd impact her personality around other people and self image#IDK you could write entire books abt her#but mostly: shes sillay#shes a little bit of a blank slate fill in the gaps but my brain is more than happy to supplement vibes and guesses#hima does not read as het to me because queer friendship groups work on stand user logic#i have a few fic ideas where it deep dives on her life as an adult and her push and pull w social interaction#but its early days on that so any details would b not very interesting past the conceot stage lol#i rly gotta get my ass to writing more fic but brain is a fuck writing longform is haaard unless its like idk visual novel formatting#anyway this is just nothing im not aiming for interaction here i just have half baked thoughts abt himawari the girl of all time#also hima kinda goes through hell and back so doing her dumbass 3 person comedy routine w her dumbass frisnds must be of big fuckin solace#its like that post about just being a girl who wants to have fun . she wants to have fun w friends#AND THAT IS OK justice for hima idk i love her even if she got the short end of the stick for deeply long term focused character writing
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ryuuseini · 1 year
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God I wanna... Say Something regarding fatphobia in media and the terms ppl use in describing characters who gain weight over time ("letting go" like bro shut the fuck up???) and how like, there's also nuance to the discussion (like, a character who starts out on the heavier side choosing to lose weight shouldn't be demonized either - as PLENTY of people want to lose weight for various reasons, and while you can point to a decent amount of it stemming from our fatphobic society, a lot of it is also just personal desire at the end of the day - but I also understand that if your ONLY fat character loses weight at the end and the other characters don't change either, then that's not good) but idk, I'm a little too tired to properly articulate what's going on in my mind? But I just... wish this was more of a discussion
#fatphobia#like - this is coming from someone who is overweight and is very visibly so#and yeah i do wanna lose weight simply because i dont like the way it distributes on me#but theres also the pressure of my mom who thinks its just wrong of me to be this weight and im like ??? pls stop#but I know for ME its more a personal desire#but i think my biggest issue is that like. bc we're at a state of representation where the bare minimum is never met#we're pushing for a monolithic representation of a far more diverse group#which. yes. i get it. ppl shouldnt be reduced to 'hi im fat bc i love food' and that be all rep#like no i 100% agree with that like a character shouldnt be striped down to solely be about being what marginalized group they are#but humans are so fucking nuanced that like. i DO want to see a character who does have a vibe of 'i like food!!' but have OTHER traits#like you have the skinny anime boy who has a million of other traits and cannot solely be defined by 'loves food'#but you also see them literally DROOLING over food and ordering a shit ton of food and somehow eating it all and like#and like the fact that here im specifically talking about Luke Yugioh Sevens who i would ACTUALLY describe as a kid who has like#ZERO awareness of the world outside of himself but does have a strong sense of self worth and genuinely wants to be great#but is very much aware he has to EARN that and doesnt want to be handed it... makes you wonder why marginalized identities dont have nuance#like??? pls just... make ppl human. humans are messy. thats what MAKES us human#this kinda got away from me but yk what i mean im tired lol
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Ever hear a song that you KNOW is something someone you cut off is fucking playing to act all sad and mopey about you leaving? Follow up question: how do keep yourself from beating the shit out of someone without feeling like you're going to literally explode
#mud rambles#bad coping mechanism hours el oh el#just ruminating dw#I need to fucking sleep lmfao#anyway to indulge my paranoia a bit!#reminder to people I explicitly cut off and/or don't speak to for a reason that you're doing nothing but stroking your own bitchass ego by#'checking up on me' aka stalking my page#learn to not be such a self centered bitch and grow actual human decency <3 and sincerely fuck you#if I wanted your fucking concern i wouldn't have cut you off#it's kinda fucking late for it especially when i was literally fucking begging for it while we were still 'friends'!#you don't get to keep pretending you care!#and as much as you wanna delude yourself into thinking you actually do care trust me as someone who has actual delusions. you don't#you wouldn't have treated me the way you did if you actually had. especially when i literally. fucking begged you to work with me#stop making excuses. stop 'explaining.' i don't fucking care. it doesn't fucking matter#i've already gone over every possible fucking reason you would've done what you did. trying to 'offer an explanation' does nothing#except. again. stroke your own fucking ego#i've already recognized i'm at fault for letting myself be your fucking doormat and not standing up for myself sooner#however! lol! doesn't fucking mean i deserved what happened or that your 'reasons' matter#you assholes know i'm incredibly self aware. more self aware than y'all like to pretend i am#because to y'all i'm either a stinky dumb man who doesn't get it or just 'your boy' who apparently has just as much self reflection as y'al#which is to say. lol. absolutely fucking none#some advice. stop projecting and work on your motherfucking selves. i've been doing it since beffore i even met y'all#as much as y'all wanna ACT incompetent. you're not. grow the fuck up. you're both literally significantly older than me.#anyway that's enough for now I need to be normal. do something before i go to sleep so i don't just stay up thinking about this lol#because i'm at least actually putting effort into being a functional adult :-)
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apricote · 1 year
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now the emperor wants me to become a fucking mindflayer help 😭😭😭😭😭
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kuiinncedes · 1 year
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ganfgjfdhgjfd
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brothersonahotelbed · 2 years
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every day i am more and more tempted to send in an application to this 4-year college in new mexico that is my ideal school bc i want the thrill of being on my own for once and for something drastic to change in my life (positive), but then my parents are like 'ohh you Have to go to community college bc it's cheaper, do you Want to be in debt till you're 30 trying to pay off your student loans??' and i'm like. well you got me there.
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poorlittlevampire · 1 year
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by the way idk what im supposed to do bc i don’t think the meds im on work anymore
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kil9 · 2 years
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aauauauuougghghs i need to move out 👁👁
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^^^ [CHEC IT OUT] i need to move out moodboard (available now !!!(
#99.txt#my mom is like ''you seem upset with mee :('' yeah cos straight up like i think i just hate u now#when i got covid it was MY problem i stayed in my room. i wore a mask any time i left. i even wore gloves to the kitchen.#to make sure she didnt get it (and she didnt !!!) and i even cleaned the whole house while i had it lol. and still kept it away from her#so now that she has it guess what !!!!!!!!!!!! everyone guess what !!!! its STILL my problem !!!#i stay in my room ! i use the basement toilet !! i have to wear a mask outside my room at all times !!#and wash my hands so much im gettin rashes because she just goes around doing whatever touching whatever ?#coughing on whatever because she doesnt give a shit !!!!#i made it my mission when i had it to keep her safe#and now that she has it its ''well if you wanna keep safe thats your responsibility'' like ???????#i promise you the thought of making space for another person & accommodating or compromising has never occoured to her once#its all ''well its up to you !!! good luck !!!!!'' yeah fuck me i guess#and she keeps bothering me asking me to help her with shit still !!!!!!!!!!!#''how do i find my documents on the computer ive had for 10 years :('' are you stupid ?????? are you dumb for real ???????#and she puts me in the situation where. im busy clearly busy with my own shit#but she feels SO entitled to my time that she will just insist that i drop everything and do something for her#if i say no or have a slightly unenthusiastic response its ''oh youre SO mean to me youre SO mean. no one will want you :('' ...ok.#but if i ask for help from my own mother once in a while its ''wow you ask so much of me you know youre not a child anymore :\\\''#yeah. i know. i dont think ive been helped with anything by a parent since i was like 15 years old#''why are you mad at me ven you seem mad at me :('' yeah . i think like you just kinda fucking suck
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niallandtommo · 2 years
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