bythepowerof4
uuuggggggggggghghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ugggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
nickatnightwalker
good morning sunshine
bythepowerof4
very very bad morning. day. all of it :/
nickatnightwalker
im trying to feel compassion but you did kind of do it to yourself
bythepowerof4
do what???
bythepowerof4
i didn't get fucked bro i was only a little off lmao
i just had like. a bad time ):
nickatnightwalker
oh is this not a hangover moaning
bythepowerof4
god i wish
nickatnightwalker
what happened
as far as i could tell you stayed clothed so whatre the regrets
bythepowerof4
i did lmao. ok like
ur ego is probably swelling in the wake of everyone's poor decision making, but would it inflate it more if i said u were right all along
nickatnightwalker
my ego's already reached terminal velocity youre gonna have to be more specific about what i was right about
bythepowerof4
etsuko :/
bythepowerof4
and prom. and prom with etsuko
nickatnightwalker
/fuck/ yes i knew it
and it's a bad thing because you dont know what to say, yeah?
bythepowerof4
fuck oooooooffffffffffffffffffff
yeah :/
but it's also a bad thing cause she was fucking smashed and wanted to kiss me and chucked on my shoes and oh my god
nickatnightwalker
oh smooth
that's a definite winner as far as first moves go
bythepowerof4
haha yeah
ok but i think maybe it wasn't the first move??? and i missed the others cause im an idiot i guess??? and she was so weird and sad and i feel like shit
nickatnightwalker
no in all seriousness i obviously have a bias but good things have come from worst first moves
it's not your fault you didnt know something she didnt say
if she's sad you didnt pick up on it that blows but it's not on you
bythepowerof4
fuck lmao u are the expert :p
and yeah. are you like. very sure im in the clear bc idk tbh
i got kinda pissy and im still kinda pissy cause she said weird things about me and also daisy but like, we're friends and i think i was harsh
nickatnightwalker
it's not your fault for not being a mind reader
bythepowerof4
i wish i was they need a class for that here. everyone wants you to be a fucking mind reader
nickatnightwalker
oh what am i gonna have to stuff somebodys second mouth with newspaper and make them smell a jockstrap or what
bythepowerof4
no you are not and none of this leaves this chat ok!!!!
nickatnightwalker
yes yeah but do i have to kill her or what i already gave thiren the flu this school year im comin in hot
bythepowerof4
was that you holy shit
she shared her flask you gave it like everyone lmaoooo
but wait no no killing!!!!
she was just like. idk im kinda fuzzy on the deets but she acted like she was scared of like. breaking girl code. getting up on some other girls territory
i think she actually said territory which made me feel very gross and i still do actually wow
nickatnightwalker
i didnt make anyone share her bottle im innocent of everyone else getting sick alright
also what the fuck
girl code? territory??
bythepowerof4
i know girl code is strange and mysterious to us both but it was still. weird
bythepowerof4
she thought she couldn't say anything cause of daisy i think. cause she brought it up before i even said shit i think???
nickatnightwalker
girl code is not a thing
bythepowerof4
i think it's shorthand for like basic decency
nickatnightwalker
alls fair in love and war motherfucker if you and someone else like the same person whoever wins wins theres no playing nice
playing nice is like, insulting
nickatnightwalker
you like who you like and someone bowing out for someone else isnt fair to you
just saying
bythepowerof4
:/
nickatnightwalker
im serious it's wildly outdated and treats you like something that someone has a right to
bythepowerof4
like territory
nickatnightwalker
very uncool
bythepowerof4
its not her fault i think im making it sound worse than it is
nickatnightwalker
to be totally fair probably she thinks you like daisy and didnt want to get in the way which is respectable and respectful and a different story but
territory is very uncool
bythepowerof4
yeah i think that's closer
idk i barely have it in me to be confused about one girl this sucks
talking to people sucks i don't know what's going on
nickatnightwalker
you dont like
have to know whats going on
bythepowerof4
it clearly helps
nickatnightwalker
like. not to be fake deep but feelings arent easy to parse like, ever
sometimes it takes a long time
so just
chill
it's not a big deal to not know what to say the second someone comes on to you
bythepowerof4
i did say things though
like a few things and i think they were kinda mean
like youre right but it Sucks !!
nickatnightwalker
ok. ok like. being mean may have cut that option off for you you know that right
bythepowerof4
oh my god
bythepowerof4
oh my god fuck
nickatnightwalker
dont freak
bythepowerof4
shes not an option she's just my friend which means i shouldn't be mean yeah
way too late
nickatnightwalker
on a scale of 1 to 10 how bitchy were you
also if shes like. not an option. and just your friend. isnt that kind of your answer clea. like i dont mean to point out the obvious or sway you in any way but im not getting strong yes vibes from this strongly negative reaction
bythepowerof4
i don't know!!! i don't know it happened very fast i think i called her dumb
nickatnightwalker
ouch
bythepowerof4
and got pissy about like. how we are Always Doing This
nickatnightwalker
what, throwing up on each other
bythepowerof4
her throwing up on me yes
nickatnightwalker
ok i can see how thats a bit of a turn of
*off
bythepowerof4
this has like. happened and i think it's bad which means i should have been nicer about it
nickatnightwalker
youre really being so vague right now
you mean shes tried to tell you before or what
bythepowerof4
i mean she's gotten off her fucking face and started crying before
and i just like, take her to the dorm or back to mine and its like. idk
nickatnightwalker
right
you dont love it
nickatnightwalker
is what im gathering
bythepowerof4
no i think
i think i think it's kinda nice sometimes cause i like helping her and that's really really bad
nickatnightwalker
it's bad that you like helping her
im just trying to get this right have patience with me
bythepowerof4
well yeah if she needs to need help before i can help her
nickatnightwalker
oooooookay well it's not like youre sabotaging her just to get your hero rocks off
bythepowerof4
that sounds even worse thank you
nickatnightwalker
youre not, are you?
bythepowerof4
i don't think so but like
bythepowerof4
i didn't stop her or anything
nickatnightwalker
youre not her babysitter
bythepowerof4
i was um. distracted but i shoulda right
nickatnightwalker
if you wanna help her outta the goodness of your heart thats good for you but youre not her babysitter
i let damian and daisy both make turds of themselves last night
bythepowerof4
they weren't even drinking that's different
nickatnightwalker
yeah, they did that shit sober
and i still didnt try to stop them
dude, my guy, bro
youre your own responsibility ok
nickatnightwalker
youre not her mom
bythepowerof4
im her friend!!!! friends look out for each other and stuff!!!!!
and if im apparently leading her on or something and making her feel like she can't talk to me and letting her get all messy and miserable then im a bad friend and im upset about it!!
nickatnightwalker
1. leading someone on kind of has to be intentional, otherwise youre just like, being crush-worthy by being yourself
2. friends arent moms
3. moms are a social construct anyway
4. you dont "let" her get anything youre not in chargeof her
cmon clea youre takng on way more of this than you should
feel bad she feels bad if you want to but guilt doesnt factor into this
bythepowerof4
you're like. way too rational
you're making it very hard to be hysterical
that's a compliment i think but im mad about it lmao :/
nickatnightwalker
my job is to be rational about everyones problems except my own
nickatnightwalker
thats my niche in the social hierarchy
bythepowerof4
big words from the guy trying to decimate my well meaning babysitter niche !!
if you ever need someone to be hysterical about your problems know that im here for you
nickatnightwalker
i have no problems my life is a glittering utopia compared to the dumpster fire of your last night and today apparently
nickatnightwalker
like i cant make your decisions for you or anything but before you do make one id seriously advise you to work on not taking responsibility for etsuko's life and bad choices cause that way lies a really fucking miserable relationship
bythepowerof4
lmao liar!! everyone has problems and i'll be personally offended if you don't at some point dump them on me like im doing right now to you. two way street :p my advice might be less cool and wise and prophetic but like. still
its not like, a """decision""" anyway cause its not some weirdo love triangle bullshit. cause i dont like. maybe if she said something before or if u know?? if shit was different
but not now
the decisiony part is just how to undo the dumpster fire lmao. which i think. i can maybe do
idk thank u ur so good at this i hate you
nickatnightwalker
i gotta be real i have no idea what anything you just said meant
bythepowerof4
oh i thought i made sense that time :/
that sucks this sucks again
nickatnightwalker
is this a new kind of sucking
or is this the same suck as before
bythepowerof4
part of the same suck
cause i don't make , like. sense :/
nickatnightwalker
just that one part where you say youre not making a decision
cause you kinda got to
even if it's to do nothing
bythepowerof4
oh
ok yeah
nickatnightwalker
"cause i dont like. maybe if she said something before or if u know?? if shit was different" also this part
bythepowerof4
well im not doing nothing cause i don't wanna fight with/not talk to anyone and if i said i was thinking of waiting it out you'd tell me that's stupid lmao
and that parts just like. u know
bythepowerof4
what she wanted to do and whether i also wanted to do that thing
nickatnightwalker
idk i actually dont think waiting it out is a terrible idea in this case
at least until she's calmed down and youve had time to think about whether you also wanna do that thing
bythepowerof4
i don't think i do right now i thought i was making that part fairly clear
it's not like a hard no cause she's cool but i've got a lot going on rn lmao
bythepowerof4
ok so waiting. lmao can you be a mate and like buzz me when it's a good time to no longer be waiting
nickatnightwalker
no that part was fairly clear from the way this news didnt like, make you happy in the least
bythepowerof4
oh. yeah i guess? that could all be circumstances though
nickatnightwalker
it's been a couple days now probably tomorrows a good day to apologize for being bitchy
bythepowerof4
ok. ok i can do that !!!
nickatnightwalker
circumstances arent THAT much of a game changer when it comes to wanting a person to kiss you or not
also dont apologize for her getting drunk that was her choice dont be weird about it
bythepowerof4
barf mouth tho
bythepowerof4
and yeah ok i'll skip that part
nickatnightwalker
ok barf mouth is actually a good point
nickatnightwalker
but still easy enough to fix for it not to be a huge dealbreaker
bythepowerof4
oh hey ets yeah let's go get you some goddamn listerine, and i'll go change my shoes and then we'll meet back here in 15 for super scheduled smooching !!
no thank you!!!!
nickatnightwalker
do other people not do that
i feel like people do that
i personally have definitely sent people away for listerine
bythepowerof4
oh my god
and you can just?? get back in the moment like nothing happened???? i don't see it
nickatnightwalker
idk if theyre hot enough you can let a lot of stuff slide
bythepowerof4
oh bc ur sooooo hot enough that they let ur critiques on their hygiene slide :p
nickatnightwalker
you think im that tactless?
im fucking smooth people dont even notice it's insulting
bythepowerof4
is there a tactful way to send ppl off for mouthwash
nickatnightwalker
yeah, you tell them what they get when they come back
or pass em some gum and hope if it's not too bad
bythepowerof4
jesus
you really think you're all that !!!!!
nickatnightwalker
what it's not like im making this up when youre out sometimes people arent super picky ok
bythepowerof4
i believe you its just weird !! i thought people were picky as a rule and like, idk it sounds so awkward
nickatnightwalker
oh no absolutely people are not that picky all the time and if you wanna k iss someone you wanna kiss them and you'll wait if you gotta you see?
bythepowerof4
oh well duh im good on the waiting part lmao
which is why i would wait for a different time entirely when no ones barfy or critical :p im very patient!!!!
nickatnightwalker
right but you have to like. want to wait. and if you wanna wait then that should kinda clue you in
bythepowerof4
oh. yeah we're talking about that again ok
nickatnightwalker
it all comes back around theres no such thing as tangents
bythepowerof4
youre a terrible person i live off tangents
ok well. yeah no. i don't wanna
like a little but not enough. which i feel weirdly bad about but sure whatever brain!!
nickatnightwalker
no
no guilt over that
nickatnightwalker
not allowed
if etsuko's a half decent person i dont think she'd want you to feel guilty about that either
bythepowerof4
tell my brain that im trying !!
she wouldn't duh
i think she feels worse about it which makes me feel worse about it
nickatnightwalker
say it with me now
i am not responsible for someone else's feelings
now you
bythepowerof4
:/
i am not responsible for someone elses feelings
nickatnightwalker
yeah there you go
try this one
im not responsible for someone else's messy behavior
bythepowerof4
i am not responsible for someone elses messy behaviour even though if i can stop it i should probably try ok next
nickatnightwalker
nope
if you want to out of the goodness of your heart go for it but you have no responsibility to stop it
not even should
bythepowerof4
are you sure not even should that seems extreme
nickatnightwalker
no like it'd be nice of you but youre really NOT under any obligation
youre not her mom
nickatnightwalker
thatd be creepy and gross clea
bythepowerof4
not obligation just like the parameters of friendship
it's creepy and gross that u keep saying that!!
nickatnightwalker
it's creepy and gross that you feel like youve gotta babysit her
im just being real here
bythepowerof4
ughhhhhhhhhhhh i knew it i knew i was gross
it's not even her ok i would look out for you if you weren't so mr perfect perfect all the time!!!
nickatnightwalker
thats the first time ive ever been accused of that lemme bask in it for a second
ok im good
nickatnightwalker
clea that kinda sounds like an issue that's you-based and youre like, gonna get worn out and have a breakdown or something
nickatnightwalker
we're kids we're not old enough to take care of other people like that
bythepowerof4
i just. don't get why ur objecting to my like, decency
if you ever actually needed it then maybe you'd get it but you don't so it's fine!!
im not gonna have a breakdown i don't wanna have a breakdown
nickatnightwalker
im not objecting to decency im objecting to feeling guilty if you dont go out of your way for someone
not like i dont generally frown on decency anyway but thats not related
bythepowerof4
no tangents!!! everything is related :p
it's just. very hard ok
can't help it, didn't know it was weird, this is by and large new information
nickatnightwalker
i too like introspection better when someone else does it for me
bythepowerof4
god right
ppl should make a living off this
nickatnightwalker
i think that's called therapy
bythepowerof4
shit yeah
ok but who needs that
nickatnightwalker
apparently most of us
no shame
bythepowerof4
:(
i don't see you so much as going to the school counsellor
bythepowerof4
that sounds weird nvm
nickatnightwalker
well you got me there
but as we've established im perfect so
bythepowerof4
lmao right!! you should go to counselling and counsel the counsellor
nickatnightwalker
you think i could take that up as an extra curricular
beef up my resume
bythepowerof4
oh for sure
"browbeat a mental health professional into respecting my superior opinions" looks good to me
nickatnightwalker
i dont have to browbeat anyone into knowing im right
nickatnightwalker
are you like. good though
bythepowerof4
oh of course!!!! my mistake
bythepowerof4
oh um. yeah
like no but yeah
everything's just a lot u know
nickatnightwalker
it sounds like it
shes not like, on you about itthough right
bythepowerof4
no she hasn't said anything
which is worse
nickatnightwalker
shes probably mortified
wouldnt you be?
bythepowerof4
well. yeah i have some recent experience here actually so yeah i can imagine
bythepowerof4
shit
nickatnightwalker
of what? bein?
bythepowerof4
yeah
being drunk and dumb and um. misreading situations and friendship and liiiiiiiiike idk
being fucking mortified
it's this
nvm idk arrgggghhhhhhghhhhhh
nickatnightwalker
damn you had a busy summer huh
bythepowerof4
:////////
yeah kinda :/
nickatnightwalker
which is part of whats going on with etsukoe?
whyd i add an e
bythepowerof4
lol autocorrect always fucks with it its so annoying
ok i guess it's maybe related to the degree that everything, as we've established, is related
but i just had a uhhhhhh not so great time with my old friends
nickatnightwalker
you were drunk and misread a situation
bythepowerof4
not the alien kind the people kind
nickatnightwalker
were you the etsuko or teh clea
bythepowerof4
oh my god. i had, like, previously been the etsuko. but that was a while ago and not a big deal it just kinda came rushing back u know and then i realised she thinks im a freak and then i did freak in a full freak way cause my face kinda popped
nickatnightwalker
what
bythepowerof4
hey do you have any problems we can talk about instead this is terrible
nickatnightwalker
im very interested in what you mean by your face popping but ok
bythepowerof4
you know like
the glamour
its kinda like paper and im underneath very much not like paper
and then pop! no more paperface no more old friends
nickatnightwalker
oh fuck
hopefully they were all trashed too and just think they were drunk?
bythepowerof4
all of them?????
sharing the same weird drunk hallucination??????
bythepowerof4
that's like extreme sunnydale syndrome
nickatnightwalker
but it's so weird i doubt theyd wanna discuss it
because theyd be worry about sounding crazy
bythepowerof4
i guess
they're still gonna think it it's still how they're gonna picture me
bythepowerof4
and apparently they already thought i freaked and had to like go "somewhere" which i guess is true but i feel weird having ppl think of me like that
nickatnightwalker
just seeing you one weird brain glitchy time isnt gonna change what they think of forever
and i mean you could like. tell them you just transferred schools
like, tell them the partial truth
right?
bythepowerof4
i did idk i don't think she believes me
or like she does but she still thinks i had a breakdown???? i just don't get it ok im very put together
nickatnightwalker
youre more anxious than i am
bythepowerof4
what
no im not
pretend i put some sincerity exclamation marks there
nickatnightwalker
yeah you can see how thats not convincing though right
bythepowerof4
the exclamation marks? those are very convincing
also im not trying to be convincing bc it's just true. cause u like. Have anxiety right
nickatnightwalker
what
nickatnightwalker
no
im anxious about living in a magic school where everything and everyone can kill me
bythepowerof4
oh i just
you use the word anxious a lot that usually
sorry :/
nickatnightwalker
im like 85% sure you can be anxious without having anxiety
bythepowerof4
well yeah i just
im sorry u seemed really like
im gonna stop ok cool im very sorry
nickatnightwalker
im interested in how deep a hole you were going to dig for yourself
bythepowerof4
im not we should really move on
also you were the one saying it's perfectly believable that i would completely flip my shit so maybe i should be offended !!
nickatnightwalker
point was you seem really stressed like a lot
nickatnightwalker
youre kinda tightly wound clea like regardless of whatever i am you are kinda a little stressed all the time
bythepowerof4
ok well
im not
or like a little bit but i don't want people thinking of me like that so this also just sucks
nickatnightwalker
yeah, it sucks for people to think youre nuts, but that's kind of how it is if youre even a little bit weird out there, isnt it
bythepowerof4
yeah. that is how it is but it's oddly enough not making me feel better :/
hey ok im just gonna put these issues away bc i don't like them and i have to deal with the main problem bc ai is bugging me oh my GOD
bythepowerof4
please don't go trying to talk to ppl on my behalf bc it is apparently really annoying
nickatnightwalker
ai is bugging you
cupcake girl?
the plot thickens
bythepowerof4
she stopped its fine
i shouldn't even have said that she's just looking out for ets cause she's a good pal and stuff there's just like
a lot
nickatnightwalker
whatd she think she was gonna do change your mind
bythepowerof4
no she just asked why im mad so she could report back
and now im reporting back on her reporting back?? this is so high school i have a headache
nickatnightwalker
where is the self awareness with these people holy shit
bythepowerof4
i don't knooooooow im freaking out i don't like it
nickatnightwalker
wait why are you freaking out
youre not mad at etsuko, anymore, right? you can like. talk to her instead youre not beholden to ai's nosy ass
bythepowerof4
yeah i can but not yet because im talking to u and daisy kinda and ai and she's talking to ai and it's a lot of talking and i actually really have a headache
everything's all doubletriple
nickatnightwalker
wanna talk about something else
bythepowerof4
yes please
nickatnightwalker
uhhhh
i took a fuckload of martial arts classes over the summer and can now reliably flip people so thats cool
bythepowerof4
oh what that's so cool!!!!
is that who was in the back of some of ur pics?? like the class??
nickatnightwalker
oh yeah
and daisys ballet class is in some of them too
bythepowerof4
yeah i defs noticed that lmao
i dunno if i said enough but that was nice
like getting those
idk i missed you and now we're all back and im making it all drama!! instead of all chill
could u flip damian. hypothetically but also for demonstrations sake
nickatnightwalker
yes and yes
nickatnightwalker
the more important question is will i
the answer to which is also yes
dont feel bad about the drama it's actually really 100% not your fault
bythepowerof4
i know but telling you about it is on me lmao
text me when you're gonna there's no way you can do that without me there ok
nickatnightwalker
who says i cant do it multiple times
and idont mind you telling me either
everything's chill on my side so it's easier to sort of have perspective
bythepowerof4
if you do it multiple times i insist on being there for all of them sorry not sorry
yeah. perspective is good. you're good at that
bythepowerof4
>:/
nickatnightwalker
ill do it right the fuck now clea
bythepowerof4
omg really
omg please
nickatnightwalker
i would never lie about this
bythepowerof4
yes yesteryear you're so good i love u tell me where
*yesyesyes lol let me be excited autocorrect!!!!!
nickatnightwalker
i was wondering why you were talking like carolyn
ok were in front of artume lets do this
bythepowerof4
yessssssssss ill be right there
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