#i know they couldn't make a line per husband and all but come one

[thebluemallet]

Eros/Psyche Parallels in Bridgerton Season 3

The show was not subtle with the Eros/Psyche parallels this season. So I attempted to go through episode by episode and find the connections. If I miss any obvious ones, let me know and I'll edit the post.

3x01- Out of the Shadows

Starting off strong with the opening credits! You briefly see a butterfly. Not only do the Featheringtons use butterflies as often as the Bridgertons use bees, but the butterfly is a symbol of Psyche.

When Penelope opens her wardrobe to that sea of YELLOW, her butterfly dress from the first ball of season 1 is visible.

Penelope talks with Genevieve about needing to find a husband this season and then we cut directly to Gregory with a bow (sans arrow) and he's pointing it directly at Colin. The bow and arrow is a symbol of Eros/Cupid.

Penelope sheds her cloak at that ball like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon.

The original Eros/Psyche myth has some jealous sisters and Prudence and Philippa, while maybe not jealous per se, are not happy to see their baby sister shining so brightly when she arrives.

And for more connection to the sisters--Psyche is the youngest of three daughters and her two older sisters are married before she is.

This one is, admittedly, a bit of a stretch but in the original myth there's some ire from Aphrodite because of all the attention Psyche is getting. And Cressida rips Penelope's dress once she is getting all the attention at the ball, specifically from Lord Debling.

Eros is sent by Aphrodite in the original story to marry Psyche off to marry someone/thing horrible (or just making sure no man wants to marry her) but Eros ends up falling for Psyche himself. Colin offers to help Penelope find a husband as a way to make up for what he said about her last year and, well, we all know where this is going!

3x02- How Bright The Moon

Edited to add (credit to @bridgertonblue)- Colin cuts his hand on the glass in the study. They flashback to this scene a few episodes later when Colin finally decides to take action with Penelope and his feelings for her. This can be a parallel to Eros getting struck with his own arrows and falling for Psyche.

Eros only visits Psyche at night. Colin comes to see Penelope at night in the garden after their scheme is exposed.

Eros accidentally struck himself with his own arrows and that's how he came to fall in love with Psyche. Colin kissed Penelope because he thought he was doing it for a friend, and he ended up awakening feelings he didn't even realize he had for her.

3x03- Forces of Nature

In the Architectural Digest Bridgerton Set Tour video, you'll see butterflies on the staircase in the entrance hall of Featherington House. It's not exclusive to this episode, I just thought I'd highlight it here since it's when we have the Eloise apology scene.

THIS ONE IS A HUGE STRETCH BUT I'LL PUT IT IN HERE ANYWAY--remember how windy it was with the balloon and Colin's arms that Penelope couldn't stop drooling over? Psyche was carried by Zephyrus-the West Wind-to her fancy new home and the godly husband she never sees.

3x04- Old Friends

Eros is tasked with marrying Psyche off, falls in love with her, and marries her instead. Colin offers to help Penelope find a husband earlier in the season, realizes he's been in love with her this whole time, and we get the iconic line, "For God's sake, Penelope Featherington! Are you going to marry me or not?"

3x05- Tick Tock

This one is another stretch, but Psyche has some jealous sisters who are not permitted to visit her at her new home (until Psyche convinces her husband to let them visit many months later). Prudence and Phillipa are being mean to Penelope over her engagement and Portia doesn't allow them to attend the engagement party. A Bridgerton engagement party, so you know that stings.

And another stretch! Psyche gets pressured by her sisters to find out her husband's true identity. Penelope gets pressured by Eloise to reveal her secret identity to Colin.

3x06- Romancing Mr. Bridgerton

Eros tells Psyche that she can never know what she looks like, which is why he only visits at night. If Psyche knows who her husband is, then eventually Aphrodite will find out and she'll be pissed. But Psyche, filled with doubt thanks to her jealous sisters, lights a candle while Eros is asleep, revealing his identity and betraying Eros.

Penelope writes/delivers her Whistledown column at night. Colin follows after her, discovers her secret identity, and feels betrayed.

3x07- The Joining of Hands

Eros leaves Psyche, feeling betrayed even though he still loves her deeply. Colin is cold and distant to Penelope in the fresh sting of his betrayal. But he still loves her and goes through with the wedding.

3x08- "Into the Light"

Eros refuses to see Psyche because he's been so hurt by her betrayal. Colin sleeps ten feet away from his wife's bedroom door (they must have had other bedrooms!) and leaves soon after she wakes up in episode 8.

Psyche has to go through some trials put forth by Aphrodite to get a chance to see her husband again. Penelope is confronted and blackmailed by Cressida when the latter learns that she is Lady Whistledown.

Psyche approaches two different goddesses to help her find Eros. Sometimes they refuse to help. Sometimes one of them points her in the direction of Aphrodite's place. Those two goddesses are Hera and Demeter. Two members of the most unlikely dream team in this episode are Portia and Eloise.

Hera is the goddess of marriage, women, and family, and she doesn't have the reputation of being an upstanding mother in mythology. She parallels Portia, mother to three ladies who she wants to see in secure marriages.

Demeter is the goddess of the harvest and agriculture. This is more of a reach, but she can parallel Eloise. In her book, her love interest Sir Phillip is experimenting in his greenhouse with peas(?) (I should probably read that book again) to increase their yield. Eloise also initially refused to get in between Penelope and Colin in the previous episode.

When Psyche goes through these trials, she's pregnant with Eros's baby. The showrunners confirmed that Colin knocked up Penelope in that mirror scene so she's in the very early stages of pregnancy here.

Psyche is indirectly helped by Eros (Zeus's eagle helps her out when they remember they owe Eros a favor). This angers Aphrodite and makes things worse for Psyche. Colin tries to save his wife by appealing to Cressida and ends up making things worse for Penelope.

Psyche's final trial involves going to the underworld. She deems this an impossible task and intends to sacrifice herself before she finds another way. Penelope decides to reveal her identity to the Queen and the ton, effectively sacrificing her reputation and potentially her marriage.

Zeus listens to Eros's pleas and grants Psyche immortality. The Queen is merciful to Penelope and doesn't punish her for Whistledown, allowing her to keep writing.

Psyche is often depicted either with butterfly wings or with a butterfly near/around her in art. Mrs. Varley releases the bugs (butterflies) directly after the Whistledown reveal.

Eros and Psyche are reunited and live a rare Happily Ever After in mythology. Penelope and Colin reconcile and go on to their own Happily Ever After.

[eerna]

How is the hate watching going? Love your rants 😭

Dhshshsh thank youuu~~

I finished the show, but I was so weak from how dumb the ending was that I forgot to blog about it. God. God what is this show. I will sum up my opinions here.

This isn't an adaptation, it's a totally different alt history with a fantasy twist story. There isn't a single plot point that happens the same way in both the book and the show, including the actual historical guidelines. I don't even think I noticed any book quotes (aside from a few remixed ones, like Jane inventing the "you come here often?" line). Idk why they didn't just call it something else, it's not like MLJ has a big fandom they could mooch off of.

I already whined about this but I need to re-establish it. All the changes made were to make the story into tiktok romantasy brainrot. The book was already super sweet and silly with the horniness appropriate for a YA romance, but these guys went full "booktok authors advertising their romantasy works" with it. It has tropes just for the sake of tropes a la Bridgerton, where it doesn't take its time to relish in any bc it has to sprint to the next one to check the box. How you mess up an arranged marriage plotline is beyond me, I think that Jane and Guildford called each other "wife" and "husband" like??? Twice???? Bc they were too busy holding each other at knife point or looking at each other's showering butts or whatever. They didn't even TRY to include the shared curse, apparently that was too boring and vanilla for them once they wrote in that Ethians keep their clothes on when transforming.

The plot is simply wack. The pacing is off because they stretched the first half of the story across 8 eps 50 minutes each, so a lot of the time everyone is pointlessly meandering waiting for the next plot point/reveal so everyone can move on. And this usually happens in the form of sex scenes. It is actually hilarious how many plot relevant sex scenes there are, at LEAST one per ep, where characters are discussing the plot and/or convincing each other to reveal their secrets. Do the writers know there are other situations that allow characters to talk to each other??? Even Jane and Guildford have sex and she goes "So about your dead mother"

The writers keep forgetring previously established stuff. Edward and Henry can imprison/execute anyone without trial, but Jane has to "find evidence" that these guys are trying to kill her. It is established Ethians absorb their clothes and any items they are holding into their animal form, but then Guildford is running around with a shackle around his neck claiming it will break his spine if he turns into a horse while it is on him, BUT THEN later he gets out of thick ropes that couldn't be cut by turning into a horse??????? Did they forget their own rules of magic??????

The dialogue isn't as bad as something you'd see on CW, but it still isn't good. I hate it when you can tell a show is trying to be edgy by constantly swearing and saying and doing shocking things, it feels unnatural and dumb. Mary in particular is the worst case of this, I don't think she has a single character trait there that isn't there for humor edgyness. She keeps licking and chewing random things, doesn't bathe, keeps getting turned on when her father and brother are mentioned, and has meltdowns like a spoiled child (at one point this is a plot point, as in "Jane gets her to get upset in public so she loses her political credibility", but there are 0 consequences and Mary keeps acting like a child in front of the entire court and NO ONE does anything and she is STILL QUEEN when credits roll on ep 8). This is the MAIN VILLAIN why is ANYONE afraid of her is beyond me. Also the cursing, murderous, racist, genocidal 10-year-old was so annoying and I kept imaging her parents and all of the writers getting sent to the salt mines for putting that little actress through that.

The lead actors are stuck in this mess. Jane and Guildford had good chemistry, in a "these actors clearly know what they are doing even if no one else in the production does" way. It went a step further and Jane had strange charged chemistry with others too, to the point where I was like "... Did she ever smash Susannah???" and "Are we adding Archer into the mix????". Lady Frances and Lord Dudley also made me think "I wish you were in a better show".

Around the midpoint of the show when I realized Jane is not yet gonna be deposed I was like "Oh no, are they splitting it into two seasons???" But then Edward finished up his portion of the story to join the finale and Archer joined Jane so I was like "Oh, they are just changing the culmination to happen during the execution". But THEN the show ends with a cliffhanger and a promise to dethrone Mary. S2 will look even less like the book, but maybe that's a blessing.

The soundtrack sounded so cheap and digital. Amazon do not lie to me and say you couldn't get an orchestra to record it. The tracks were on loop you literally needed like a few days tops to record it.

All in all. This show sucks man I am so annoyed at it

[softguarnere]

Like A Girl (Like A Man)

Shifty Powers x OFC

Chapter 39 - Epilogue: Donadagohvi

Summary: She studies her husband’s face. It’s lined with age, but still as beautiful and as bright as the day she met him. A/N: Alright, y'all - we've made it! But before we get started, I've got some things I have to say. This fic was started during a very strange era. I hated what was going on in my life but didn't know how to fix any of it. Long story short, but I decided to run away one day, and ended up in Toccoa. While standing in the military museum there, I started thinking about Deborah Sampson (a childhood hero of mine), and wondered what would happen if a story like hers happened during WW2 - specifically, if she was a paratrooper. Thus, Zenie appeared in my brain, and this epilogue wrote itself in my mind as I went through the museum. I was never sure if I would share this fic until the second that I hit "post." Zenie was just a way for me to blow off steam, to escape - to fulfill my desire to be someone else for a bit. (Coincidentally, all themes throughout the fic.) I didn't know how people would respond to this story, or to this character, and I only ever had the courage to start uploading chapters because of friends like @latibvles and @liebgotts-lovergirl who showed enthusiasm for it. So I couldn't upload this chapter without a massive sgi (thank you) to them, as well as to everyone else who has read this fic and been so kind to it, and to me. Thank you for welcoming me into this fandom. Thank you for allowing me to share the Cherokee language with you. Thank you for all the support you've given me for both my writing, and as friends. Whether you knew it or not, all that kindness came at a time when I really needed it, and I appreciate you all. Without further ado, here's the last laglam update, in which the fic's title finally makes sense. Much love 💖 Warnings: language, alcohol Taglist: @latibvles @liebgotts-lovergirl @lady-cheeky @dcyllom @mads-weasley @ithinkabouttzu @mrs-murder-daddy @lieutenant-speirs

Eugene looks just the same as he did when Zenie first met him. So do all the other men on this side of the reunion. For her part, she also looks the way she did when she first met all of them – albeit like a girl rather than like a man. For now, her hair is long, and her chest unbound.

No one seems to have figured out why they all look young again, and it has only been mentioned in passing during the reunions. There are better things to do, like visit with those they can, and pass between the ones they left behind, feeling their hearts swell with love as they watch them laugh, watch them remember – watch them live.

Another thing that no one has figured out is why they seem able to come back to this world at certain times. David Webster says he once read that the veil between their worlds thins during certain times of the year, and that maybe this is true of the Easy Company reunions. Zenie, however, likes to believe that it’s the love of the people still living who allow them to come back. All that love with nowhere to go. Love so strong that remembering the people you felt it for brings them back.

No time to wonder now, though. Gene is already smiling at her in greeting.

“Hello again,” he greets as she joins him.

“Gene,” she teases him with an affectionate poke to his ribs. “You haven’t aged a day since I met you in forty-two!”

“Eh, I don’t know about that, Tommy Boy,” Luz’s confident drawl digresses as the radioman swaggers up beside her. “You look a little taller. What, did you finally hit puberty or something?”

Zenie rolls her eyes, but there’s no malice to it. She did, after all, keep him in the dark about her secret until her very last day in Europe. Instead of leading him on, she asks, “How does everyone look?”

“Us? The same as ever. Them? – “ Luz gestures towards the reunion that can’t see them. “ – Well, I guess they’re aging with grace.”

“Have you seen – “

“Bill and Babe are at the bar, as per usual. And your darling husband is somewhere around the middle.”

Zenie takes a step forward before turning quickly to face her friends. “Do y’all mind if I . . . ?”

Gene smiles. “Go ahead. That’s why we’re here.”

Grateful, Zenie takes off through the crowd. Visiting her friends like this is something she always looks forward to, but visiting those she left behind is a rarer treat, and she would like to check up on them. Especially Shifty. 

Bill and Babe – to no one’s surprise – are the easiest to find. They’ve got the bartender in stitches with their jokes, and their own accented guffaws are like a lighthouse cutting through the crowd that makes them easy to navigate towards.

“Siyo, boys!” Though they can’t see or hear her, Zenie takes a seat beside them at the bar. “What’s new with y’all?”  

“They’re drinking everyone under the table, as usual,” a familiar voice beside her announces as none other than Joe Toye takes a seat beside her. His expression is just as relaxed and confident as when they were young, but as he watches their living friends, something like longing flickers behind his eyes. “Too bad that we can’t show them who the real champs are anymore.”

“At least we can visit them.”

Joe nods, smiling sadly. “You made your rounds yet?”

“Not yet.”

“Well, we got time,” her friend assures her. They have nothing but time, actually. And they use it to sit with their friends, laughing along with their jokes and making their own, even though Bill and Babe can’t hear them.

As their jokes turn to remembrances, Zenie finds herself swept up in Babe’s retelling of the time she chucked an apple at Cobb’s head back in Holland. She barely remembers the scene, able to recall only a flash of anger and a split-second decision. Babe’s version is far better – he paints her out to be some sort of knight in shining armor coming to defend the honor of her friends.

Bill shakes his head and chuckles into his drink. “Goddamn. Zee sure could make a scene.”

“You weren’t even there when her secret got out,” Babe notes. “Now that was a scene!”

“No one ever brings it up,” Bill marvels, his eyes roaming over the crowd, searching for something. “You would think everyone would talk about it all the time. I mean – shit! A woman disguised herself as a man and made it from Toccoa to the bitter end before she got found out, and no one at the reunions brings it up.”

Zenie can’t help but smile at that. It’s true – her secret got out, she had to leave in a state of semi-disgrace, but at the Easy reunions, she was usually only acknowledged as Shifty’s wife. Sure, every now and then someone would tell a funny story about Sergeant Driver before throwing a knowing wink in her direction, but after all this time, it’s like they’re still keeping her secret for her. For her own part, she never brings up her service, except to mention in passing that she met her husband during the war. Even her own children seem to be under the impression that she must have been a nurse or a WAC, using that explanation to fill in the story’s blanks. Zenie never confirmed or denied their suspicions.

“Wish she were here,” Babe sighs. He orders another round of drinks, three this time, before placing one in front of the seemingly empty bar stool beside him – unknowingly, right in front of Zenie. He raises his own glass as he offers the last one to Bill. “To Zenie.”

Bill clinks his glass against Babe’s in a toast. “To Zenie.”

“To the best friends I ever had,” Zenie adds. During her last reunion – and even during the last year or so of her life – she could sometimes swear that she could feel a presence that she couldn’t explain. An unshakable feeling that those she loved who were already gone were somehow watching her would wash over her, though she could never explain why she felt that way. Now, she wonders if her friends feel that way about her. Just in case they do, she channels all her love into those words, hoping and praying that they can feel it.

As if on cue, the bittersweet moment ends when a woman with sleek, dark hair approaches the bar, smiling. “Uncle Babe! Are you ready?”

“Luna.” Zenie watches as her daughter throws an arm around each of the men at the bar, her smile just as bright as her father’s, outshining the sun itself.

“The real question is, are you?” Bill teases his goddaughter, cocking an eyebrow. “Don’t forget, kid, that your uncle is a champion jitterbug dancer.”

Luna sizes up the man in question. “Well, I’ve been practicing.”

“Don’t worry about her.” Babe takes one last sip of his drink and waves off Bill’s concerns. “Her mom could have been a champ, too. It’s in her genes; she’ll be fine.”

“The DJ said it’ll be the next song . . .” Luna begins explaining as she hooks her arm through her uncle’s and leads him towards the small dance floor.

Bill watches them go, chuckling to himself. “Real firecracker.” He glances at the drink set out in honor of Zenie. “God, I wish you were here, little brother. It’s not the same without you.”

“I am,” Zenie assures him. She’s only been gone for two years, but things have changed. That might have scared her once. Not anymore. “I have to go find Shifty. You don’t mind, do you?”

Bill doesn’t answer, of course, but it’s polite to ask all the same. Granny didn’t teach her to mind her manners for nothing.

Zenie weaves her way through the crowd of both the living and the dead. She greets several people, stops to exchange a handshake and a kind word, and sends a nod to those who she catches lurking at the edges of the room – people like Liebgott and Captain Speirs, who only show up in the margins of the reunions, watching, but never joining in. She needs to thank those two specifically at some point. But it’s like Joe said – they’ve got time.

As Luz promised, Shifty is seated at a table in the middle of the room. Their sons, Wayne and Willie, sit on either side of him, laughing along with some story that he, McClung, and Popeye are in the middle of telling. Zenie finds a space to stand behind her husband, being as present as she can. She places one hand on Wayne’s shoulder, and the other on Shifty’s.

At the moment of contact, Shifty’s posture stiffens, and his head turns slightly. Zenie freezes, like she’s just disrupted something. Has she? Can he feel her here?

Shifty only listens to the story being told halfheartedly now. He smiles and laughs in all the right places, but it’s obvious that he’s distracted. These reunions are supposed to be fun. Sure, they can get a little emotional at times, but she doesn’t want her husband missing out on her account. He’s still got a life to live. He needs to be in the present moment and enjoy it.

Zenie bends slightly so that she’s close to Shifty’s ear. She doubts anyone else at the table knows that she’s here, but she wants this to be a private moment for the two of them.

“Shifty,” she whispers. “I’m here. I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay.” She has to pause for a moment to think about what she wants to say. It’s one thing to plan what you’re going to tell somebody, and another thing entirely to deliver the message. Sometimes things get lost in translation. She learned that during their break back in the war.

She studies her husband’s face. It’s lined with age, but still as beautiful and as bright as the day she met him. God, she misses him. She misses all of them.

“The boys look well,” she continues, looking between their sons. “I hope they’re taking care of you for me. They’ve always adored you.” She pats Shifty’s shoulder. She shouldn’t take up his attention too much longer. “Take your time. Enjoy it. I’ll be waiting for you, okay? I’ll see you soon, Shifty.”

Not sure if it will work, she plants a kiss on his cheek. When she pulls away, she watches as Shifty’s hand comes up to touch the place where they made contact. Maybe he really can feel her here.

“Gvgeyui,” Zenie says. I love you.

Gene is waiting at the edge of the crowd when she finds him again.

“How’d it go?” He asks.

Zenie nods. “Good. You?”

“Good.” Gene’s dark eyes flick over the crowd. “It’s nice we get to do this.”

It is nice. Bittersweet, mostly, but it’s good to see their loved ones again, even for a short time before they have to go back. But returning isn’t bad, either. The weather is always warm. And there are people she loves waiting for her there.

In fact, she should get going for exactly that reason. Granny wants to dig ramps soon, and Mama informed her that there would be a pie waiting upon her return. No matter which side of the gauzy veil she’s on, there is always someone waiting for her, and always a place that she belongs.

For strength, Zenie takes Gene’s hand and gives it a squeeze. He returns the gesture, and they begin to walk away from the crowd. But before they go, Zenie can’t help but glance back at Easy Company one last time. Her eyes, as always, land on Shifty. She’ll see him again. She’ll see them all again, in one way or another.

“Until we meet again,” Zenie informs them all, whether they can hear her or not. “Donadagohvi.”

[borrowedtimeandspace]

Ad Perpetuam Memoriam

AU: The Donna Trilogy | If I Could Turn Back Time

Note: Farewell, Ten...

Not a ton of actual g/t in this one, as per usual in If I Could Turn Back Time. More of a recontextualization of Ten's regeneration.

~~~

Burning.

Everything inside, burning like the sun.

It was all the Doctor could do to contain it all. He'd held it in for as long as he could. Now it was coming for him. To take him away, and replace him with some new man.

He'd done his best to make the most of his remaining time. That was his reward, after all. Getting to say goodbye.

And he had, in his way. Seeing faces that had been all together not so long ago, now scattered across time and space. Doing good and living their own lives.

For most of them, he hadn't said a word. Not because there was nothing to say, but he was never one for a proper goodbye. In his mind, this was better. Saving Martha and Mickey. Introducing Jack to another familiar face. Even protecting young Luke from harm and being able to wave goodbye to his dear Sarah Jane one last time. 

It got more complicated as he held a copy of A Journal of Impossible Things and stood in line to meet and have it signed by the author.

Verity Newman. The great-granddaughter of Joan Redfern, the woman whose heart he inadvertently broke when she fell in love with his human persona back in 1913.

Whether he meant to or not, the Doctor had hurt Joan in one of the most painful ways possible. In John Smith, she had found a love deep and profound, and had no way of knowing that his life was not only false, but fleeting by design. The Doctor was a living reminder of that fact. 

That's why he couldn't bring himself to visit her directly, even though it would have been easy enough to do in the TARDIS. He had no doubt that seeing him again would do more harm than good. At best she would turn him away, as she had done so long ago, before he could get one word in.

No apology in the universe could satisfy that hurt.

What was almost worse was that, as he waited his turn to speak with Verity and have her sign a copy of the novelisation of Joan’s journal, she wasn't the only person on his mind.

Ever since he started his farewell tour, he had at least a vague plan for how to visit everyone he wanted to see. For Joan, this was the best he could do. It wouldn't make amends, but would at least acknowledge what he did wrong. After this signing, he had an idea for an indirect goodbye for the Nobles. And though he couldn't cross universes to see Rose one last time, he still had opportunities to at least glimpse her in the past.

And there was still one person he was incapable of seeing again.

He did his best to push that thought out of his mind. The man in front of him was walking away, and it was his turn to see Verity. She and Joan deserved better than absentmindedness in that moment.

~~~

The wedding was beautiful. Well, what little the Doctor saw of it from the outside, in the aftermath of the actual ceremony. Donna and Shaun were glowing, showered with flower petals in the pleasant spring breeze. 

When the Doctor managed to catch Sylvia Noble and Wilfred Mott's attention, he was sure to keep the conversation with them short, yet meaningful. He simply gave them the gift he'd brought, and explained how he was able to come by it. 

A small token from Sylvia's late husband to give to his daughter on her wedding day. 

He stuck around long enough to see it given to Donna. She had no clue about the weight it carried, but her mother and grandfather could silently appreciate it. After everything he and Wilfred had gone through that Christmas, saying goodbye to him and Sylvia felt just as important as saying it to Donna. Even if he couldn't say so directly to her without risking her safety.

Wilfred had been a rock for the Doctor in the time leading up to the end. Out of anyone on the planet, he was the one who managed to hunt the Doctor down fairly quickly, and right when he needed someone. 

At first it was just good to have someone to talk to again. Traveling alone was starting to take its toll. With the foreboding feeling of his death hanging overhead, he'd had nobody to open up to about it, nobody who might even begin to understand what that meant for him.

“I'm going to die.” Four small words that had felt like a cold anvil resting on his hearts.

He knew Wilf was well-meaning when he brought the Doctor to a cafe close to where he knew Donna would be. Hearing about her life without him was bittersweet. She'd gone back to living as an ordinary human, struggling as the rest of them did. Engaged to a friendly-looking man, sharing that ordinary life with him. And yet something within her was aware that she’d lost something, and yearned for it without knowing what or why.

Still, it meant the world to the Doctor to see her again.

Then Wilf had to go and ask him. “Who have you got now?”

“No one,” the Doctor had to answer.

“What about…” Wilf had trailed off when he glanced to the Doctor's shoulders, the breast pocket of his jacket, and found them both empty. Looking him in the eyes once more, that emptiness was present there, too. Wilf's heart sank. “Did something happen to the little ‘un?”

The Doctor's jaw clenched at the reminder. Memories crashed over him like a wave before he could do a thing to push them down. A horrible man pointing his device toward the only friend he had left to travel with since Donna had to go. Calling Zepheera's name just as the device fired, a shot of blue light engulfing the inches-tall woman and leaving nothing behind.

It hadn't killed her, but to the Doctor it might as well have. It had displaced her in time and space, and he had not a single lead as to where or when she ended up. 

If she were human, hunting her down would have been difficult but potentially doable. Like finding a needle in a haystack. But she was a borrower; not only small in stature, but hard-wired to survive by remaining hidden and not making waves. It turned the search into finding one particular mote of dust in a haystack the size of a skyscraper on an empty and uncharted asteroid floating in the Void.

“Lost,” the Doctor finally managed to tell Wilfred. “For good.”

Wilf's face fell. “Oh, I…”

���Traveling alone, now,” the Doctor pressed on before Wilf could get out his condolences. Feelings and memories now swirled around him in a maelstrom, and he was struggling to bring them to order. But maybe they needed to come out.

Right then, there was nobody he trusted more with his vulnerability than Wilfred Mott.

“I thought it would be better alone.” At this, he broke eye contact. He couldn't hide the shame in his expression, in his voice, as he admitted, “But I did some things that went wrong.”

Mars was still fresh in his mind. The water creatures overtaking Bowie Base One. Knowing full well that the demise of the crew was a fixed point in time, and being unable to resist sticking around and helping them anyway. Only to ultimately decide that he was through standing by any more when he could do something to change it.

Because who in the universe could stop him if he tried?

He learned the answer to that when he brought the few surviving members of the crew back to Earth. As he reflected on his attitude back then, the way he spoke to them and especially Adelaide…talking her up as an important figure that he'd managed to save from her established fate while waving off basically everyone else as little people. It made his insides clench in hindsight.

Donna would have given him a smack for that kind of talk, if he was lucky. And Zepheera… If she'd heard that, she'd probably never speak to the Doctor again.

And in the end, it hadn't ‘fixed’ anything at all. Adelaide still died, and her legacy remained largely unchanged. The Doctor hadn't accomplished a single thing in his act of arrogant defiance.

He thought that traveling alone would mean that he couldn't lose anyone else. Instead, he realized then that it just meant the only person he had left to lose was himself.

“I need–!”

At that point, the Doctor cut himself short and buried his face in his hands. He could feel the floodgates weakening, and finally made an effort to rein himself in. Wilfred wasn't asking for him to dump all those emotions on him at once, and breaking down in the middle of a cafe did no one any good.

Not him. Not Donna. Certainly not Zepheera.

Though they split off shortly after that, having Wilfred around for the journey to come had been a balm. The Doctor had someone to talk to, someone with ideas that weren't his own. More than that, he cared for the Doctor and had his best interests at heart when the Time Lord could only focus on the daunting tasks at hand.

He was almost surprised when Wilfred's response to learning that the Doctor was over 900 years old was to reflect on humanity in comparison and remark, “We must look like insects to you.”

Oh, no. The Doctor could never look at them that way. Least of all after he'd experienced traveling with someone like Zepheera.

A large part of his travels were taken in through the eyes of his companions. They were the ones with fresh perspectives on things the Doctor took for granted. On occasion, his human friends could help him realize the enormity of his decisions and actions. With Zepheera, it was a daily reminder of that. She found the strength and bravery to face a universe greater and wider than even humans could perceive it. 

The Doctor had even managed to find a way to literally see things from her point of view, and that was in the forefront of his mind as he regarded Wilfred fondly and replied, “I think you look like giants.”

She would have loved this, thought the Doctor as he looked back on Donna's wedding festivities. Seeing Donna so full of joy on the happiest day of her life… It was a sight the Doctor wanted to remember for the rest of time. He only wished Zepheera could have been there to see it, too.

And wherever and whenever Zepheera was, he wished for the same thing he had for Joan Redfern. That she was happy in whatever life she'd made for herself.

The Doctor's work was done here. He could feel himself running out of time, and he still had one more stop to make. But he was so reluctant to leave this place. Especially considering what came next.

~~~

There was no stopping it. The Doctor knew that painfully well.

Already the regeneration energy had begun to flow from his hands, even as he piloted his ship into orbit. He barely paid attention to the time he set it to, simply determined to not start whatever new life that waited for him in 2005. He couldn't risk changing anything that happened with Rose before it even began.

It wasn't fair.

That thought turned over and over in his mind. This face, this life, was still so fresh. He'd only had it a handful of years, and to have it so quickly snuffed out… Sure, he'd done quite a lot in that time, but it still felt all too fleeting. Barely a blip in his 900 years.

He could still hear himself shouting to absolutely nothing and no one, “I could do so much more! So! Much! More!” That feeling was still there, but the anger had largely settled. Now it just made him sad, seeing the end so rapidly encroaching on him.

The worst part was that he was well and truly alone for it. Rose had been there when he'd changed last, hers was the first face he saw with fresh eyes. Even when he'd sort of regenerated with the metacrisis, he'd had Rose, Donna, and even Jack there with him.

Now the TARDIS, the one place that felt like home, was so terribly cold and empty.

The Doctor could feel the heat rising, spreading from his core. Soon it would take over every cell in his body, rewrite everything that made him himself.

He wasn't ready. None of this was right.

“I don't wanna go,” he uttered, sounding so small and helpless even to himself.

No one was there to hear it. He felt no comfort or warmth in his final moment. Only the burning of a sun as his vision turned gold.

[darkisrising]

⭐

suuuuusssshhhhiiiiiiiii my love! Thank you for playing with me, and per our dm conversation you settled on the sex worker bobadinluke au series for the director's commentary ask game. Which is gonna be hard since you were there when I was writing it, I'm not sure what I can come up with that you wouldn't already know/vaguely recall, but I'll give it my best shot.

Right away, I'll say that everyone that knows me has dragged me at least once about my fic titles. I'm not great at coming up with them, and usually just pick something at random. At the time I was writing this series, I had this idea of grouping fics together with some very loose theme. Which is why my dinluke stuff mostly have a mando'a words as titles, the big BDL series are all lines from songs by Frank Sinatra, and this series has titles that are all songs from the 2000s. The songs have nothing to do with the fic, except that the one line I used for the title somewhat had something to do with the fic itself. Which I know drives @bronze-lorica crazy, lololol, and I'm sure she'd not alone.

This series started off as three prompt fills. Three people requested "sex worker" from a list of AUs but asked for different ships, and I decided to make my life easier by setting them all in the same, modern world. This series got me by the throat as I was writing, and I'd post a little more, only to be like "Oh! And another thing..." over and over, until there were 37k words of it.

I knew I didn't want to tell an angsty story with this one-- I love angst but I wasn't in the mood--so instead I went with the idea that Luke's a sex worker that's doing this as a means to an end, and is very clear about when the end will be. So, instead of seeing him hit rock bottom and let that be the motivation for the sex work, it's more transitory than that. This is only a moment in his life that we're seeing, and he's very clear about that.

His sex worker style I sort of based on the persona I take on in my client-facing/customer service jobs. Upbeat and patient. "You can trust me" and "We'll get through this together" vibes. And since I like my triads where everyone is a puzzle piece that fits in together, providing something for each person that's unique and different, it synced up nicely to make Din someone with a repressed/religious fanatic background. Luke's very open and non-judgemental, not to mention competent, energy is like Valium to Din. It lets him soften and be more willing to engage in a way that he doesn't really with his bristly husband. Boba's my gruff, blue collar man and when I hit on the idea of him dealing with chronic pain from an accident at a construction site (the Sarlacc building project, he fell into the pit, natch, and then after I decided that, I couldn't stop hearing Andy Dwyer singing "pit. I fell in it, the pit. You fell in it, the pit. We all were in that pit.") it made sense that Luke was able to help him if he was training to be a physical therapist. After that, it was all a matter of teasing those three connection points in different directions to see how the three of them could provide for each other in unique ways. That's really where the plot (such as it is) came from. Writing it was a really organic, natural process, which isn't normally the case for me. But, I guess, I started off knowing the characters in this incarnation really well (and with faaaaaaar more clarity than usual) so it was mostly a matter of seeing where that would take me.

(link if anyone else wants to play)

[droughtofapathy]

Suffs: Broadway and off-Broadway

Changes I Liked:

The tighter story. The off-Broadway version was good, but the pacing often felt chaotic and scattered. They shaved fifteen minutes off the runtime, and it needed that trim. Though perhaps not so much...

More of Carrie Chapman Catt and Mollie Haye's rumored romance weaved throughout the show. It's now pretty implicitly clear they're involved. They get a kiss. I love it.

Grace McLean in a short grey wig looking like a soft butch lesbian.

Emily Skinner as Alva Belmont/Phoebe Burn. I loved Aisha de Haas, and I loved the wink-wink, nudge-nudge of the "every grassroots movement needs a rich white broad," line. But I love Emily Skinner and I'm so glad she's back on Broadway and gets to strut around in big hats and furs. She doesn't get to do much, but she's doing great ensemble work.

Hannah Cruz is great as Inez Milholland, so I guess I can accept we lost one Asian featured player.

Changes I'm Still Not Sure Of:

Per above, we got Kim Blanck as Ruza Wenclawska, the role Hannah Cruz played before. I'm not sure I fully like the new interpretation. Hannah really set the bar. And hey, an Asian featured player.

I know they had to cut for time. I get why these moments were cut. But there were moments off-Broadway that gave nod to the non-white movements. During the March, there was a Chinese mother who brought her baby. "...your audacious Chinese mother marching so you could be free..." was a line that split me wide open. I'm not Chinese, but I'm a different kind of Asian, and just having that sort-of representation was wonderful. Off-Broadway also had the character Nina Otero-Warren give a rousing speech "your vote counts, your vote matters, use your power, get out and vote," in both English and Spanish, and I loved that. I know they cut because they couldn't delve deeper, but still.

The ensemble is smaller. The big group numbers feel quieter. I think a lot of the lost bite comes from losing this sheer presence on stage. The ensemble numbers also cut certain actors like Grace McLean from playing other suffragists, so the numbers are even thinner now.

I get why they cut it, but I really liked the punch of "I Wasn't There," a song about how the 19th Amendment was signed, but there's no actual documentation of the day itself. No photo-ops, no throng of reporters, and none of the women who worked tirelessly to shake hands and witness the signing. It was like this slap in the face.

There's a new song about Alice contemplating a life with a husband and child to illustrate all she was willing to give up in the name of the cause, and that's all well and good, but I don't care.

Speeding up the pacing meant losing some of the building tension. Suddenly it's the march, and suddenly it's all over, and suddenly we're--and it goes on like that. I'd have been fine taking back an extra five minutes to just stay in one of the big moments.

Most of the vaudeville type numbers were cut. Makes sense. Solid choice. But it does mean musically the songs are less diverse. The vaudeville numbers were also big ensemble pieces that filled the space.

[hellguarded-moved]

≥ INCOMING TRANSMISSION FROM: @hellhunted ( "SOURCE" );

❝  i killed them for you.  i know you could’ve done it yourself,  but you shouldn’t have to.  ❞ nao/ig

one mission, then two, then three, and then some. it was like getting back into old, bad habits, and something like that? had always been so surprisingly easy. the grip on a gun was natural, even if his aim was long since shaky. the way their bodies moved in sync, weaving between their enemies' assault. he still didn't like it, it still made him tired, but at least it gave him some peace of mind for his own, personal reasons.

and he liked to be there. with him.

it was better than just anxiously waiting for him to come home.

he always cherished the side-by-side, back-to-back fights the most. though he also understood when they needed to play to their respective strengths; he'd wanted to leave the avian with a kiss to his cheek, before seeing him off to set up a sniper nest, while the canid was meant to act as bait. as per usual.

something he'd noticed, however? was that he never found himself in a directly attacking position. only ever helping naoto to get a clear line of sight, to make sure nobody jumped him from the back; doing little more than pacifying their targets and either leave them there or let the falcon decide of their fate. even if he didn't agree with the outcome, he let his partner have the deciding hand in this all. he still wished to limit his participation in some ways.

even now. finding himself pinned to a wall, with the other clutching tightly onto a knife aimed straight at ignis' throat. claws dug into the man's own wrist to keep him at bay... he clearly had murderous intent. and yet. he hesitated, once more. suddenly finding himself alone, there was little more to do than to struggle; to shove the assailant away, then deliver a sharp kick to his middle to incapacitate him and simply leave him on the ground writhing in pain. this was good enough. he wasn't what they came here for. it was meant to be a quick retrieval mission, though of course, the object in question had been guarded.

as far as he was concerned, nobody had to die.

the sniper was only meant to provide cover should things go awry.

as far as he was concerned, it didn't. yet. if ever?

boom.

the man he'd subdued was met with a bullet straight between his eyes. any squirming had subsided. in his shock, he hadn't noticed another trying to creep up on him.

boom.

through the ringing in his ears, he heard another body drop lifelessly to the ground. he turned around to look at the corpse, sighing. then through the window, now shattered, where he could only assume his partner had nested. he couldn't see him from this angle nor the distance; but he knew he was there. a brief breath was taken to assess the situation. it seemed like he was finally alone in the entire building, free to access the restricted documents. he then made his ways to the rooftop to meet the avian there; greeted by a familiar and comforting sight of black feathers shortly after.

" why did you do that? " he asked quietly, not meeting the other's eyes, only waving the stack of papers between them, to wordlessly showcase that the mission had been successful. he supposed.

you shouldn't have to.

the words brought a smile to his face as he simply stared at the ground. honestly, it was... so impossibly charming, and yet so wrong on so many levels. none of them had to die, he'd wanted to say, even if the initial stealth had gone awry, but he simply shook his head and let out a quiet laughter. he wouldn't elaborate. not even once he finally lifted his gaze, free hand reaching behind the back of husband's neck, to pull him in close for a kiss; first to his forehead, then his lips.

" thank you. "

[xi4obby]

Best of husbands and best of all men

While the moon was still in the sky, Cyno got up to his office. He started writing a soft letter, his head running kilometers per minute. While stretching his back, he heard steps through the hallway.

— Cyno, come back to sleep…

The soft voice of Tighnari made him smile.

— I have an early meeting out of the village

He felt the fennec hugging him, kissing his head.

— It's still dark outside

— I know… I just need to write something down

The silver haired man turns his head to kiss Tighnari's forehead, sniffing his ear.

— Why do you write like you're running out of time? — The younger asked, caressing his lover's face — Come back to bed, that would be enough…

— I'll be back before you know I'm gone.

— Come back to sleep…

He hugs Nari tightly, pulling him to his lap, laying his head on his chest and carefully touching and caressing his ears. They stay like this for a while, only feeling the love between them. Tighnari almost falls asleep there, sighing and getting up to call him one more time.

— The meeting is at dawn — Cyno says, before Nari could say something.

— Well, I'm going back to sleep…

He says, kissing his lover's lips softly, having no clue of what that meeting would be, or cause to their lives. As he turns around, Cyno pulls Tighnari's hand, looking at him.

— Hey… — His voice is calm and deep — Best of husbands and best of all men. I love you, desert flower

— I love you too, forest leaf 

He kisses the fox's hand, letting him go back to bed. He takes the feather and finishes writing, getting up and taking a quick shower before leaving. He meets up with Candace, handing her the paper. 

— If I don't manage to get back… Give this to Nari, and tell him that I'm sorry

She only nods, walking by his side till the surroundings of Port Ormos. As they arrive, both can see Kaveh talking with AlHaitham, looking serious as he never did before. Candace soon reaches the architect, and they only say a few words to each other, before coming back to their respective partners.

— What did he say? — Cyno asks, trying not to transpire his nervousness 

— AlHaitham really wants this. There's nothing I can do bro… I'm sorry.

Cyno takes a deep breath, hugging Candace.

— It's okay. Let's finish this quickly and get back home.

All the four can see a doctor standing near. When Cyno and AlHaitham get face to face, the doctor turns around, so he can have deniability. Both men have their weapons in hand, when the count starts.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9…

At number 10, the fight starts. The metal of the spear and the sword make a thin sound when it encounters each other, their eyes fixed.

— Why do you want this?

Cyno asks, AlHaitham growling and attacking again.

— You know why, Mahamatra, don't play the fool with me.

The general retreats, before defending the scribe's attack. He couldn't believe that a little fuss would make him so angry, at the point of wanting to kill him.

— I'm sorry, is that what you wanna hear? I am sorry AlHaitham.

— I don't want to hear your fake apologies. I want to hear you scream in pain for getting on my way.

Cyno didn't want to attack. Cyno didn't want to fight at all, not with a friend, that was what he considered AlHaitham as. He was a great fighter, one of the best in the entire Sumeru, but he wouldn't hurt or even try it on the man in front of him.

— I don't want this. It's over. I'm heading back home.

He says, and it only makes the scribe more and more angry, at the point of attacking Cyno, non stop.

— ALHAITHAN IT'S OVER, STOP.

The desert man says, trying to block the attacks. Suddenly, a warm feeling on his belly catches his attention. And when he looks down, AlHaitham sword is getting out of his stomach. The blood runs out, and as he looks up, he can see only regret in the other's eyes. As Haitham tumbles apart with Kaveh, the doctor approaches Cyno, trying to stanch the blood, while the pain grows hard and fast. With the help of Candace, the three of them return to Ghandarva Village, using the Ley Lines as a quicker transport. 

— Tighnari…

His skin was going pale and his voice getting weak, but his lover could still hear it. Nari ran out of home, finding him on the way, taking Cyno back with the help of the other.

— W-what happened? Who did this to you?

The fox asked, laying his husband on their bed, getting on his knees without knowing what to do. The doctor had said that there was no solution, and Tighnari was dying inside as he saw the life of his lover going away. He cried silently, caressing his face, kissing softly his lips, while Cyno tried to breathe, becoming harder second after second

— I'm… I'm sorry, my love…

— What are you saying? This is not your fault Cyno.

— I'm sorry…

Tighnari knew his husband. He knew that, if he felt a little amount of fault, he would apologize till the other pardoned him.

— It's okay… I'm here now, everything will be okay…

The Mahamatra coughed, the tanned skin turning pale.

— I'll… I will wait for you Nari.

— Promise?

— I promise my love… I'll wait… forever… I love y…

After his last breath, Tighnari couldn't hold back the tears. He spent hours by his side, holding his cold hand, blaming himself for letting him go. As the sun went down, the whole village and a lot of the general friends arrived for a simple funeral. After the body was buried, Tighnari returned home, feeling the house empty, as his heart. That's when he looked at the office table, a folded paper with a flower drawn on it. He sat at the table, taking the paper to his hand, and reading the letter Cyno wrote him earlier 

To my beloved Tighnari.

  This letter, my love, will never be delivered to you, unless I have finished my story in this world; to begin, as I humble hope with the grace and mercy of the gods, a happy immortality.

   If it had been possible for me to have avoided the injurious fate, only my love for you and our kid, would be alone a decisive motive. But as it wasn't, I shall ask for your pardon, because of the failure that I led, although knowing you might tell me how it's not my fault.

   I do not need to tell you about the pangs that I feel, as I know it would only aggravate the pain that you anguish now.

  Only the Archons, my love, might be able to, alone, comfort and support you. And these, you have the right to enjoy. Fly to the bosom of our Lesser Lord Kusanali, and be comforted. With my last ideia; I shall cherish the sweet hope of meeting you in a better world.

  Goodbye, best of husbands and best of all men, my desert flower. Embrace Collei with all my love for me.

Always yours

C.

[randomnameless]

Final Chapter - Freege to Velthomer!

Last time in FE4, Hilda died and we learnt that Julia was supposed to be the only one to save the world.

What’s going to happen now?

Ishtar joins her mom in the place all Jugdralian people go to before turning into ghosts, and Manfroy reveals his trump card : EVIL!JULIA!

Ishtar will lead the last “human” forces against us. The Weissenritter was mentionned during the first gen, can they live to their hype?

don’t mention the name of that owl to me julius

This is super creepy though, Ishtar apologise because she has to leave his side, and Julius wonders why she wants to get out so badly... Toxic relationships 101 : something you have to avoid at all costs

remember when the isaachian maggot sliced’n’diced you? You know, the one who’s married to your brother? “i have nihil now”

This is side of Ishtar we don’t always see, the one who’s proud to be a part of Freege’s prestigious mages. 

I wonder if this is really bullshit, but i like this part of “they killed my family i can’t let them run amok”. We’re in a game called Genealogy - it works for the heroes, but also for the other side.

Julius is kind of aware that Ishtar wants to escape him? Why? Because he knows that his actions are utter crap, or because he knows she’s found out about Loptyr?

:’(

I don’t know who Ishtar’s trying to convince here, Julius or herself? Or maybe she loves “Julius” but she knows “Julius” is dead, so she has no reason to live anymore and seeks death? Loptyr suspects something, but ultimately, he doesn’t care. 

We’re not in the “i love you” “ i know” Leia/Han, more in the “i love you” “whatever”...

Vaha had children with brown hair?This one has some serious eye problems or red eyes are common? Maybe she’s one of Julius’ half-cousins?

Sorry yourself!

His dad died, Ishtar’s made her last good bye, but to him it’s still a game? Or maybe he sends his deadlords to help Ishtar’s troops?

or maybe they were the reason why she wanted to run away asap from belhalla because zombies are kind of creepy

PURGE THEM MY PAWN

EVIL JULIA IS SO EVIL SHE HAS DOUBLE MIRACLE THAT’S SO EVIL I CAN’T EVEN

:’(

Aerone has no place in the postwar!Jugdral, and especially no place in the future Thracia. Keep going where? For what?

Revenge? I guess anyone who spot the zombies knows that there is no “winning back” anything if Julius wins. If Leif wins, they will never be able to return to the motherland, but if Julis wins, they will never be able to return to, idk, anywhere because there won’t be a somehwere to land on.

It’s not a defiance, it’s just pointless. But it’s the beautiful kind of pointless, something tackled on at the end of the game - this game is called genealogy, revenge breeds revenge, etc...

Oh shit - I forgot to check their skills and they were aware, so no murder in sight for Faval (remember how his uncle Andrei was famous for killing peg knights? Faval tried to do the same, but Meng and co aren’t as naive as Manhya). Seriously those peg knights were a pain to deal with.

Liar, i gave you a sword. Arthur is sassy and rude towards his wife, that’s not very kind of you.

Well, I can’t disagree with him here. You’re in the last map of the game, a sea of red units is in sight, it’s not the time for an idle and pointless support convo!

Of course she’s important to you, she’s your wife! You forgot or something??

OH! YOU DIDN’T

Promises you can’t keep 2.0. : 1 !

Who’s going to inherit Velthomer? Not Saias, he doesn’t exist in this game!

Attack!

Oh. Note that Ced had accuracy issues here, due to all those LS stars around. When I said this part was annoying, it was annoying because i had no reliable way to murder the peg knights, and Cairpre - unpromoted in all of his glory - was loitering around.

Hit 54 for the supposed greatest unit in the game? That’s disappointing - granted, Faval’s hit rate was around 15-20 so...

At least you mention your sisters! It nearly made me feel bad for killing you.

Maybe because Arion isn’t Quan’s and can’t switch sides so easily?

What truly matters is to save the world from Loptyr, but Alty’s going too far. His own vanity and pride? Your new friends killed his dad, and want to put Leif on his throne!

“he promoted since our last meeting?”

Setting his own suffering? Is Seliph feeling bad because he has to kill his brother - wait he just said he’ll managed to convince Julia to do it for her - or because of something else? Like everyone is suffering in this war, but they must do it to save the world?

“and getting rid of my dad to avenge Quan was compulsory to save the world?”

Anyways, RN, Seliph’s fighting to save the world, so swallow your pride and join us? Is it what Alty’s trying to say?

???

Where does this come from? Why making a moving speech just to spit on it afterwards? What about fighting for justice? I don’t understand those siblings at all...

Julius called him a mercenary? And fighting for Altena, really? He gave up on the motherland and all of his previous motives just like that?

Meh.

Poor Tine. She tries to make Ishtar remember how she used to be the kind cousin, surely the kind cousin doesn’t want to fight for a brat summoning zombies around!

Ishy acknowledges she’s doing the “wrong” thing, but she can’t turn back now. At least she managed to save the children, so she’s just here following Julius for “reasons”, not because she believed in his crap. But why dying? Well...

“It is I, Ares the Bla-”

“Shut up”

Ares doesn’t tolerate people telling him to shut up while he is announcing who they’re facing against.

I don’t remember why i screencap’d this. She’s affiliated to Belhalla, not to Ishy? idk.

Well, she already died...

After Ishtar and her friends’ death, Seliph and co run to Velthomer to kill a certain someone but...

What are you talking about

hit 20 - at least he’s not being assaulted by naked women like the FE5 version of the spell but gdi Ares

“Julia, I’m your husband!”

“HA HA HA You’re not even important to the plot, and you’re from the land of no relevance! Even Miletos is more important than your barbarian country!”

She’s too evil to recognise her husband!

Oh. Seliph suggests that Manfroy cursed her, so he must have spot her convo with Ulster.

What about the “do not hate people but the evil in their hearts” or something?

And here, Seliph finally knows what happened to his mother! Has he even believed once that she betrayed to marry Arvis and knew about Siggy being her former husband but didn’t care, or has he always known that his mom was brainwashed to end up with Arvis?

Manfroy is proud to explain his grand plan. And proud he shall be, he played everyone just to bring Julius into this world!

In the old translation he meant that Loptyr finally took possesion of Julius, but here I think it’s more ambiguous?

WELL NOBODY COULD IF YOU KILLED THE USELESS PUPPET YOU SENT TO TORMENT ULSTER

Oh Seliph. I truly believed that your Father would have died in the first gen, regardless of Manfroy’s ambitions. Siggy wasn’t meant to survive in the Granvalle of Arvis, Reptor and Langbalt.

Manfroy is an exception to the “don’t hate the people”, just like the Dozels.

Ares stole the kill - or maybe he wanted to help Seliph “you can’t preach about understanding people if you murder this guy on spot”

What evidence? Some real evidence or your last hopes? I mean, the guy/dragon must have been so relieved to see Julia alive, so what’s another miracle after that?

Detective Felipe!

Just smash the locked case damn it!

So here Arvis’ “take this circlet it will save you” was actually relevant! He knew Julia’d be sent in Velthomer and she’d be able to open the box?

“why can’t we just smash the thing” - “it’s a magic lock” - “can’t we ask Patty” - “Magic Seliph, magic.”

I hope this changes in the remake. Really. I thought she’d be free once Manfroy died, but nope, she continued to try to kill her husband.

You crossed Granvalle on your own without being conscious?

Brainwashed her uh? 

was she going to tell him about her secret identity?

so you know how i hate you because you killed “the kindest man” and how i will never let you near Julius?

kidding

Seliph apologises because he couldn’t fulfill the promise he made her in the first chapter, it’s a cute throwback to chapter 6!

Julia knows why she survived all these years for, not because F!Lewyn was a gentle soul who rescued her out of kindness, but because she was a weapon! 

:)

You never ran away?! You were warped around by everyone and never had any agency! 

This is uncomfortable - Why is Julia thinking it’s her fault because she ran away, and why is Seliph telling her she’s right??

Oh, here we find the same kind of speech Alty gave earlier. They must march on to get rid of Loptyr!

No “welcome back Julia, are you okay?” Goodness, with F!Lewyn around, no wonder why Julia still thinks her dad is the “kindest man” ever.

F!Lewyn is so happy, he didn’t fail his mission! Finally, the naga major has the book of naga! It could have happened way earlier but here it is!

“it was the shiny book on mom’s bedside’ table”

Shining!Julia

TIME TO END THE GAME

[softly-potter]

Master List

FINALLY created the master list! Transferring all my fics here because lets be honest, Tumblr is making a comeback. All of my fics are available on Ao3 @softlypotter_0 and Wattpad @softlypotter_ as well.

You’ll probably notice some empty titles and unclickable titles; I'm going to be working on transferring my stories here over the next few weeks so bare with me :)

💋=implied smut, 🔥 = includes smut, ♨️=purely smut, ☁️ = fluff,  💔= angst, 🎶= song/music inspired, 🔪= includes violence/gore

Bucky Barnes X OC/Reader 

Eradicate ☁️💔 - Bucky's always had a soft spot for the girl down the road. (2 Chapters) Chapter One | Chapter Two | Epilogue

Quickly Falling ☁️ - After interning in the body mechanics division of Stark Industries, Cassandra finds herself drawn to one of clients. (One-Shot)

WandaVision

Romantic Homicide🎶💔🔪- Bucky helps Wanda steal Visions body to give him a proper funeral, but her goodbye ends up differently than he imagined. (One-shot)

WinterWitch

Stay Forever💋☁️ - After settling into a friends-with-benefits routine, Wanda tries to break their cycle in the hopes of something more. (One-shot)

I Like You♨️☁️🎶 - Wanda & Bucky finally get the break they deserve. (One-shot)

Little Love🔥☁️💔 - When Wanda ends up pregnant a few weeks before their wedding, having an impending family shocks them both. (9 Chapters)

Still Friends ♨️💔🎶 - After a chance encounter at a party, Wanda and Bucky find they have more in common than they realized.This fic is heavily inspired by 'Friends' by my lovely friend Poppy. She is aware of this fic and I've been given permission for this marvel-version retelling! If you haven't read her dramione fic 'Friends', I HIGHLY suggest it. I fell in love with the story and couldn't help but wonder, what if it was Wanda and Bucky instead of Hermione and Draco? Thus "Still Friends" was born. Enjoy! (18 Chapters)

Turning Out🔥💔🎶 - With their marriage crumbling right before their five-year wedding anniversary, Wanda tries different ways to keep her husband. 

Bring Him Home☁️💔 - During a mission, Bucky goes back into Winter Solider mode, and Wanda helps him back. (2 Chapters)

Touch Tank ♨️🎶 - Struggling to sleep, Wanda asks for help from an unlikely pot-smoker. (8 Chapters)

Dance with Me🔥💔🔪 - All the times Bucky asked Wanda to dance, and the one time he didn’t. (2 Chapters)

Where do Babies Come From?🔥💔🎶 - Wanda & Bucky are more over their heads then they originally thought when finding out she’s pregnant. (2 chapters)

What We Know♨️💔 - The up’s and down’s of loving a super solider.

Am I Dreaming♨️💔🎶 - Realizing she needs more help than either of them can provide, Wanda breaks up with Bucky before she admits herself to a pysch ward. (One-shot)

The Lists☁️💔 - After losing her brother, Wanda keeps a list of everyone important to her, so that she can keep them at a safe distance, but Bucky has a list of his own. (One-shot)

Frank Castle X Karen Page/OC/Reader

Slowly♨️☁️ - Karen asks Frank if he can slow down; he’s more than happy to oblige. (Friends with benefits au!)

Returning the Favor♨️☁️ - After accidentally seeing a picture not meant for him, Frank realizes there may be more than professionalism between him and the newest hire of Nelson & Murdock.

Drastoria

Reckless 💔🎶 - Astorias always been faithful to her husband but she isn't sure he can say the same. (2 Chapters)

Family Line 💔🎶 - Draco & Astoria struggle dealing with her illness and all the repercussions that come with it. (3 Chapters)

Love💔🎶 - Newly engaged, Astoria tries vocalizing her feelings to Draco. (One-Shot)

Meeting in the Middle☁️💔 - After being released from Azkaban, Draco suffers from night terrors and Astoria is forced to play along until he wakes up. (One-shot)

If Anything Happens, I Love You☁️ - Grown and married, the Golden Trio and Slytherin Group prepare to send their children off to Hogwarts. Told by one chapter per couple, a sneak peak into their family lives. (5 Chapters)

Dramione

After Tonight 🔪🔥💔 - After the war and Voldemort wins, he dies from old age; but not before attempting to create a potion to keep him alive. His remaining Death eaters finish what he started, and soon a potion that staves off death is in the hand of every pure blood, Death eater and the wealthy. The key ingredient to the potion? Muggle-born blood. (ON HIATUS UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE)

Iniquity ♨️💔 - Draco's having a hard time coping with the world post-war, and he uses sex and alcohol to get by. It never occurred to him that Hermione might be coping in a similar fashion. (14 Chapters)

You Get Me So High 💔🎶 - Draco and Hermione meet for one final time before their separation is official. (One-shot)

Grounding 🔥☁️ - A few years after the war, Draco is working as an Auror. Constantly in dangerous and life-threatening scenarios, he aches to give his fiancé a normal life but isn't sure he deserves it. (2 Chapters)

Milk & Honey 🔥☁️ - Inspired by the quote “I’ve had sex, she said. But I don’t know, What making love, Feels like” by Rupi Kaur, Hermione and Draco have sex for the first time since they started dating. (2 Chapters)

Happier Than Ever💔🎶 - Hermione finds an unlikely place to turn to when she begins having panic attacks. (One-Shot)

A Pathological People Pleaser💔🎶 - After 5 years of dating, Hermione is fed up with waiting for Draco to take the next step. (One-shot)

we can’t be friends💔🎶 - After a tumultuous breakup, Pansy informs her friends Ginny and Hermione of a facility, Brighter Days, that uses a new obliviation technique to remove a selected individual from their memory. Hermione thinks it’s an unorthodox method…until she goes through a breakup of her own. (3 chapters)

Thansy

A Consumption of Grief 💔🔥☁️ - Pansy's estranged mother has died, and after an unfortunate event at the funeral, Theo shows her who her real family is. (One-shot)

Hansy

Care Less More💋💔🎶 - Pansy keeps Draco’s bed warm when he has no one else around. She goes to great length to prove she could care less; but a certain Gryfindor hopes she can see her value. (One-shot)

Regulus Black x OC/Reader

Hiraeth 💋💔 - Adelyn has been promised to Regulus since childhood, and wants nothing more than to be his wife. She knows she makes him happy, that they can flourish together. But we all know how Regulus' story ends. (4 Chapters)

RWBY

Cancer🔥💔🎶 -Waking up in what he knows is a dream, Jaune spends the day with a family that could've been his had Beacon never fallen. (One-shot)

All Roads Lead to Home♨️☁️ - Emerald is greeted by an unexpected (and drunk) visitor in her home. (One-shot)

Leave the City♨️☁️🎶 - After finding Ruby lost in her thoughts, Weiss offers a way to bring her back. (One-shot)

talk ♨️☁️🎶- Struggling with adapting to their new life in Vaceuo, Ren finds a way to finally shut Nora up.

[kazanovah]

Pairings: Bonten trio x f!reader

Warnings: mature themes 18+ | kinda sad this chapter ngl|

Synopsis: after having her life ruined by the military she served for, reader is out on a vengeance mission to seek justice for herself. She’s full of dark impulses, grief and just overall a bit of a stubborn dumbass.

Previous| Part 4| Next

MDNI 18+

As you drove through Tokyo, you were only half paying attention to your surroundings. Your mind was constantly being plagued by the horrible images of the lives you had taken merely two weeks ago, and you were confused on as to why you had been dwelling on it for so long.

Was it because you knew you finally reigned victory over them? If that was the case, then why couldn't you sleep at night still?

Or was it maybe the fact that your satisfaction had been taken when the older Haitani murdered their ring leader?

Whatever it was, it had caused your ptsd to come back in full swing. You had a hard time with anything that required heat, your showers were never really hot per se, but now they were icy cold as they had been when you had first gotten home from overseas. You had found yourself looking at the urns on the shelf in the foyer, one for your husband and one from the unborn baby that only you knew about at the time Wantanabe and his men tortured you, and each time you thought about it you could have sworn the scar on your abdomen ached just the slightest bit.

Your cellphone began to ring loudly within the quietly vehicle, scaring the absolute shit out of you and causing you to jerk the wheel slightly to the right as you jumped. Once you reached over and found the phone, you didn't bother to check the caller ID before answering it and bringing it to your ear.

"Hello?" You said, astonished that someone would even be calling your phone, especially at two in the morning on a Wednesday.

"Lieutenant Commader Saito." The familiar voice on the other end of the line said, stating your name as a greeting.

"G-General Nakamura?" You questioned, disbelief in your voice.

"Sorry to call you out of the blue like this, but I have something you might wanna hear." Nakamura said, making your eyes widen slightly.

"What is it? Everything okay?" You had a gut feeling that you knew the answer to the question you had just asked.

"Not in the slightest. I had been notified that Wantanabe and his screw were found slaughtered at the abandoned nuclear plant. I'm not going to turn you in, I know why you did it and I can turn a blind eye to this." Nakamura said, making you exhale a breath you didn't know you were holding in.

"But your tags are here." He said, making your brows knit in confusion.

MY tags? There's no way.

"General, sir, there's no possible way they're mine." You said, trying to rack your brain for any reason as to how they would be there.

"I know, Saito. I- I don't know if this is something you want to hear, but there's been some speculations that Second Lieutenant Saito is... is still alive." With that, you slammed harshly on the breaks. All the air had left your lungs and even though Nakamura couldn't see you, you were shaking your head back and forth.

"W-with all d-due respect sir I- I think that's highly unlikely." You said, remembering the charred body you had clung onto for dear life.

No, there's no way.

"I was going to tell you sooner but I had just heard the tumours two days ago. There had been a breach in our security systems and a bunch of files had been hacked into. We're still looking into it, but the person or persons responsible are good at what they do. Unfortunately your file was pulled and—" your mind was whirring and you felt sick to your stomach.

You couldn't believe what he was telling you. All of the potential suspects who would be inclined to want to know your whereabouts were dead, you saw to that two weeks ago.

You were pulled from your thoughts when you heard shouting on the other end of the phone.

"What the f- holy shit. Lieutenant I'm at the plant now and-" Nakamura's voice was cut off when you heard a gunshot, and you heard his phone falling to the floor before the call was dropped.

No, he can't die. You have to save him. He's the ONLY one who helped you in your time of need.

That thought was the only thing you needed to convince yourself to slam on the gas pedal, making a harsh left turn that had slid out the back end of the truck in a drift, causing the tires to screech against the dry pavement as you dashed your way back across town.

You knew you were going into this blindly, but what other choice did you have? You could either have carried on with your night, going to the store and then going back home to drown your sorrows with a bottle of bourbon and for sure let General Nakamura die, or you could do what you were doing now - a rescue mission that may go south and cost you your life.

But what were you truly living for now that everything you worked hard for was finally done and over with?

You had cut the lights on the truck as you pulled into the parking lot outside the plant, spotting two, empty Volvos. You made sure to park far enough away as to not be seen coming, and you reached over to pop the latch on the glove box.

As it fell open with a thud, you reached in and felt your fingertips brush against the cold metal of your Beretta, and you pulled it out before taking out the two mags along with it, and sliding one into the gun.

At least it's suppressed, you thought to yourself as you were unsure if loud noises were going to trigger a wave of your ptsd, and that was the last thing you needed.

You looked over at Lina, she was already staring into the darkness of the warehouse. You knew that she could see and probably hear what was going on, and you made sure to reach over and run your fingers through her silky coat.

Shit, I don't have her vest here. She's gotta stay.

"Good girl." You said, before commanding her. "Stay."

With that, you opened the door to the truck and slid out, your feet hitting the ground lightly. You made sure to close the door behind you gently as the last thing you needed was to alert them that you were coming.

You swiftly made your way through the parking lot and towards the broken glass doors that led into the plant. You made sure to keep to the side so that if anyone was on the main floor, they wouldn't see you coming, and the closer you got, the louder the voices became.

"Shit man, I can't believe we got the army's General!" A tall, lanky male said to his bulky friend, making the bulkier male scoff.

"He's not the acting general anymore, you know that right?" He had shot back, making his friend roll his eyes.

"So? We still got him. Once word gets out into the underworld, the Tigers will be on par with Bonten if not better!" Lanky said, and you rolled your eyes.

Its pathetic what wannabe gangsters would do for a little bit of fame, you were disgusted by the thought.

"Hey, he was one the phone with someone right?" Bulky asked, making his friend nod.

"Yeah, why?" Lanky answered.

"Do you think that he told them where he was?"

"Nah man, don't think so. Boss shot his knee out quickly, the only thing I heard was his screaming." Lanky said again, and this time, you saw red.

It's showtime, fuckers.

With that, you were quick to fill the doorway and fire a bullet into the lanky males head. The shot was muffled and his bulky companion didn't notice what had happened until blood spattered across his face, and his friend dropped to the ground beneath him.

"What the-" the bulky man yelled, raising his glock to aim it at you, but thankfully you were faster than him, and you shot his throat before he could pull the trigger.

Piece of cake, you thought as you wandered deeper into the plant.

You scouted the bottom floor, making sure every nook and cranny was free of wandering thugs before making your way into the stairwell, where you were met with another two men.

They hadn't heard you opening the door, and they seemed to have both been busy with watching a video on a cellphone. As you revealed yourself by stepping up onto the first step, they noticed you and began to get up from their position on the floor.

You tapped your trigger twice, unloading two bullets into each of their chests and watching as their now, lifeless bodies slumped back against the moody wall they had been leaning against in the first place.

How can they be so stupid?

You were amazed at how easy it was to kill off four men who were supposed to be guarding the building and you continued to climb up the stairs until you reached the second floor.

Bursting through the door, you saw the hallway was empty. You could hear the sounds of muffled talking, and you pressed your back to the wall just outside of the doorway to listen in on a conversation once again.

"What were you doing here, General." An unfamiliar voice asked.

"Eat shit." Nakamura said, and the sound of knuckles brushing against skin filled the corridor and your eyes widened.

Good, he's still alive.

"Im looking for Saito. You said she was in wit-pro, but you and I both know that's a lie." The unfamiliar man said again, making me furrow my brows

Who the hell is that and what the fuck does he want with me?

As you peered in the room you could see General Nakamura being held up onto his knees by a man who had fisted his greying locks. Nakamura was covered in a mixture of blood and sweat, and it made your heart hurt.

No, no emotions. Not now. You reminded yourself, before firing your gun into the male holding Nakamura.

"Ah, shit." The man interrogating the General huffed out, and you watched him raise his gun to fire it at you.

Making the split decision to slide over behind a counter in the makeshift break room, the bullet ricocheted off the wall, but the bang from the gunshot made your whole body begin to quiver.

Fuck that was so loud.

You didn't have your Comtac's to muffle the sounds of gunfire, and you were forcing your mind to stop thinking about the past as another rapid fire of bullets erupted into the room.

Each bullet penetrated the cupboards you were hiding behind, and you had somehow managed to duck and roll out of the way with each one. When you heard the person reloading, you knew it was your chance to strike and you peeked up from behind the counter and fired your weapon.

The bullet caught the man right in the chest, and you watched him stumble backwards into the wall behind him, before slumping to the ground. He was breathing heavily, clutching his bleeding wound as he stared up at you with wide eyes.

"Lieutenant, you came." Nakamura coughed out, looking up at you from his position on the ground.

You were confused on as to why his voice was brittle, until you saw the fatal wound that was seeping blood through his t-shirt and onto the floor around him. You hadn't realized he had been shot in the chest too, and you quickly looked back over to the dead male slumped against the wall.

General Nakamura was trying his hardest to get up off the ground, making you kneel down and place a hand tenderly on his right shoulder, gently guiding him back down to the ground as he winced from the pain erupting in his chest.

"You... you're bleeding." He said, making your brows knit in confusion. It wasn't until he pointed it out that you realize a bullet casing had grazed you shoulder and think you might have happened from a ricocheting bullet.

"Don't worry about me, General. We have to get you a proper medic." You said, reaching up and moving his hand from the wound and nearly gagging from the severity of it.

He's lost so much blood already, you thought to yourself.

"No... no time. B-but Saito... Ren's a-al-" he was cut off by a gruesome cough that caused a pool of blood to slip past his paling lips, covering his chest and abdomen in even more blood.

No... he can't - he can't die. He was the only one to help me. You could feel your eyes pooling with tears, and you blinked harshly to clear them so that Nakamura didn't have to see them.

"Alive. Don't know h-how b-but h-he wants... you." Nakamura said, gasping for breath shortly after.

"Shh, stop talking. S'okay General. L-let me call an ambulance th-they can help." You said to him, reaching up and brushing the greying hair from his face before your other hand reached into your pocket.

Luck would not be on your side that night for as soon as you pulled your cellphone out, you heard the sound of a single footstep behind you before your entire body was met with a painful shock, making you scream as your body violently convulsed. You had dropped the phone almost immediately to the ground, hearing it break as you did so, and your body soon fell along with it.

"Cant believe you didn't hear me coming, what kind of soldier are you?" An unfamiliar voice asked, his condescending tone making you seethe with rage. You had fallen onto your back, staring up at the dark ceiling when a face suddenly appeared in your vision.

Huh? Wantanabe? No, it can't be. His eyes wet blue and this man's eyes are dark, almost black.

"W-who are you?" You asked, your body still tense as all hell from being tasered by the stun gun in the man's hand.

"Wantanabe's brother, obviously. Do we not look alike, you stupid little thing." The male said, crouching down into a squat before bringing the gun back to your neck and zapping you.

You screamed as you convulsed, your stomach had clenched so hard that you needed to vomit and as the seconds turned into what felt like hours, the stun gun was finally pulled away from your neck and you rolled on your side and puked violently on the ground beneath you.

"So weak, how did you make it out of that fire? Oh right, your mutt had saved you. Where is he now, hm?" Wantanabe's brother teased, bringing up his foot before slamming it down into your abdomen, making you grunt in pain.

You writhed in pain on the ground, your eyes watering with unshed tears. As you looked over at General Nakamura, you could see his cold, lifeless eyes staring back you with a single rolling down his cheek.

He's dead.

"N-no." You cried out quietly, reaching out to grab the cellphone that had fallen from your hands, when the male above you stomped on your wrist, and your entire arm radiated with pain.

“Do you really think you’re going to last long enough to call for help? Pathetic.” He spat, rolling you over with his foot so that you were facing the ceiling once again.

My fucking body, it’s so tense. Everything hurts.

“Say your prayers, lieutenant. Geez, it’s so wrong to even call you that. You didn’t deserve that position, Hiro did.” His brother spat, and despite every single fibre of your being screaming in pain, you couldn’t help but choke out a laugh, earning a harsh stomp on your abdomen once again, ending your laughter with a fit of coughs and garbles.

“You think this is funny to you?” He questioned, though this time you remained silent and made sure to hold his gaze. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that you were terrified out of your mind, he didn’t deserve to know the way your mind was comparing this situation to the one that happened overseas, or the way your mind was running through every single significant memory.

“Rot in hell with your husband, lieutenant.” The man said, standing up and raising his gun to aim it at your face.

You closed your eyes, silently thanking the dead male beside you for everything he had done. You thanked your shitty parents for bringing you into this world, you thanked your… maybe not so dead husband for giving you a chance when nobody else would have, and you even thanked fucking Ran Haitani for taking out the last of the men that had hurt you.

This is it, I’m officially done for. You thought, just as the sound of paws thumping on the ground brought you from your trance, and just as the sound of the gunshot when off, you opened your eyes in time to see Lina, jumping front of you and sinking her teeth into the man’s throat.

A garbled scream escaped his throat, at the same time a blood curdling shriek escaped yours when you realized the blood spattered across your face came from the bullet in your dogs chest. The tears you had been holding back were now rushing down your cheeks as you watched Lina tear and rip at the man’s skin until he took his final breath, before she slumped onto her side.

“L-Lina?” You called out to her. although your voice was barely above a whisper, you could tell she heard you by the way her ears perked up the slightest bit.

No, God please no. I cant- I cant lose her too, you thought, rolling onto your stomach before crawling your way over to her body.

Your body ached, each muscle in your body seemed to be taking their turns spawning painfully - the aftershocks of being tasered. You chose to ignore it as you eyes solely focused on the way her laboured breathing had begun to grow shallow.

You reached out to her, pulling yourself into her and wrapping your arms around her fluffy body. You could feel her lightly licking your hands - something she was trained to do whenever you would have a panic attack, and you couldn’t help but feel more overwhelmed at the fact that even in her dying state, she was making sure that you were the one to be comforted.

“G-good girl. Always will be.” You sobbed, burying your face into the back of her neck and sobbing loudly. Your body trembled with each shaky breath you took, and another scream left your throat when you felt her body still.

She’s cold, she’s so cold . You kept repeating to yourself, over and over again like a broken mantra that only made the pain in your heart intensify.

In this moment, you had given up entirely. The darkness that had been clouding your vision was beginning to take over, and the more you cried and gasped for air, the darker the world became.

The last thing you could remembered were the several pairs of legs that came into your vision, and you smiled softly knowing that you wouldn’t have to be alive much longer. You were grateful that you wouldn’t have to suffer any longer, and so you finally let the darkness consume you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@skebrii @toobsessedsstuff

[peralta-guaranteed]

do you have any headcanons about what happened after the nope scene at the end of trying? thankyou <3

It's a bittersweet moment, Amy thinks as her brain seems almost detached from the whole situation, watching the two of them stand in the hallway and frowning at the latest single-lined test (how she hates single lines now, no more 'single-spaced, double-sided, Santiago style'). They've agreed to stop the insane pressure, and just see where it goes, and Amy really wasn't expecting a sudden miracle after all that, and she's supposed to take it 'light and breezy' now as per her own decision, but it still hurts as much as all the other negative tests have hurt. But she doesn't want to show that to Jake, because it's not what they talked about, is it? She's supposed to not worry about it anymore.

So when Jake wants to pull her into the almost customary hug she gets now after each setback, she waves him off.

"Eh, it's fine, eeh buddy? Take it easy, s'all good." She manages in her extremely fake-chill style that she knows convinces absolutely no one, especially not her husband, before she rushes off to the kitchen to throw the test away.

He follows her soon after, and it's the first time she wishes he wouldn't.

"Ames," his voice is too soft and too close and too comforting, and she can feel her hands gripping the kitchen counter too tightly, feels her knuckles go white without seeing it. "It's okay."

"It's not." She sobs out before he does pull her into that hug, her face against his chest and his chin on top of her head, gentle hands rubbing across her back, and she slumps down into him like she's going to faint without his hold. Maybe she is. "I know we said we- and it's fine and- but it's not. It's not, Jake."

"No, I mean - it's okay to be sad. It's okay to still be hurt about it." His hands on her back won't stop, and neither will his soothing voice, and it's all a bit too much right now, but maybe it's also exactly right. "You don't have to hide that."

And then, instead of answering him, she cries.

She's cried about this whole horrible mess before - on the evenings where Jake couldn't make it home on time for another UD because of work, and she had to go to sleep alone while the notifications and alarms on her phone set off, with heartfelt apologies from him and unemotional reminders from her calendar. She's cried in the bathroom after the first drops of blood in her underwear each month, even though the negative test a few days before had already warned her this would happen. She's even cried on Rosa's shoulder once, after she finally told her best friend about what she and Jake had promised they wouldn't tell anyone to avoid that extra pressure, after she finally could come clean about why she was being so morose and declining girls night drinks all the time.

But she's never cried about it all in front of Jake. It didn't feel right - he shouldn't have to shoulder that as well, he was carrying enough for the two of them. Except now she wonders how she could've been so stupid.

He's the one person in the world who'd understand. The only one who's in it with her, who's going through all the same rollercoaster emotions and fears and worries. And, above all, he's her person. He will always have her back, will always want to take the weight of her shoulders, will always be there by her side to hold her hand and walk at the same pace.

And he proves it now, by being quiet while she sobs into his chest, by not trying to give her comforting words where there are none, positive outlooks where she can't see them. He lets her cry it out, as much as she needs it, the only constant being his hands on her back and shoulders, caressing and massaging at the same time. And god, does she need it. She can feel all the tension and darkness and pain almost seep out through her tears, her constantly rigid body finally falling slack, her baited, held breaths break out into deep sobs and whines. She's letting it all finally go, let's it flow out of her, because Jake is there to hold her through it, hold her after it all too, and keep her standing.

When she finally feels strong enough to stand on her own again, and she leans away from his now soaked chest to look at him without letting go of the hug, she can see the remnants of tears on his cheeks as well. His eyes are red and shining, but they're also unbelievably soft and so full of love, so warm and comforting.

"It's okay." He repeats, and his voice is heavy.

"It's okay." She echoes, and they share a broken little smile before a slow, chaste kiss.

Things get easier after it all. She turns off her UD alarms and lets them sleep in on their days off. He packs away the war room boards and the harem pants and the endless bottles of pills (except for the ones that make his hair extra soft, and the ones that seemed to help with her skin problems). She listens to him shout at Wario on their couch in the evenings, and she goes out to drink with Rosa once.

They don't actually sleep with each other for a while, finding themselves again in soft cuddles and slow kisses instead, in holding each other close while watching tv, in having quiet chats about everything and nothing in the darkness of their bedroom. In her hands in his hair, and his lips against her neck, drifting off into sleep in a hug without the thought of a timed need for non-intimate intercourse bearing down on them.

And when they do find themselves in bed again with roaming hands and quiet whispers, it's not for an UD or for a timed reminder or for a baby, even. It's just for them, for Amy and Jake, who are still stupid good at this and who still love each other more than they could've ever imagined, and who prove it to each other that first night more than enough.

And their shared smile after isn't broken anymore, nor is it little.

Amy decides the next morning to call her doctor, ask about those fertility hormones she'd mentioned last time. Take it slow and easy and see where it gets them.

It finally gets them those two little lines. Double-spaced, single-sided, Santiago-Peralta-style.

[piscesparker]

Betraying the bond

Masterlist | Taglist

Prologue

"That will be all for today your highness." Mr. Bernard, my private tutor said. Being the princess I never had the opportunity to get an education like the other children of the kingdom, hence my father, the King of Northollow, and the previous Kings and royal members received a formal education within the walls of the castle.

And due to my luck, I am the first born and next in line for the throne; hence the classes. In other circumstances this would be frowned upon, but since the change of times, the law of only a male heir to ascend the throne was scrapped out and I have the honor of being the first princess to be Queen of Northollow without being wed. My parents were really proud when they discovered that I would love to reign over our beloved kingdom instead of handing it to my younger brother, and me living the life of a typical queen, wearing pretty dresses and hosting tea parties while my husband ran the kingdom. It's not like I didn't like that life but I would never say no to a sword fight against a worthy opponent, board meetings or piles of paper work. Two sides of the coin right?

Usually after Mr. Bernard's class I would be either in my room reading a book or just going for a ride with Spencer, my horse, but I was summoned by my dear father in his office. He never called me so suddenly, I always had to make an appointment even though I was his daughter. Knocking on the polished doors, I heard my fathers deep voice telling me to enter. As the door creaked open I saw the bustling of all the people, his court, arguing over something very obvious. I knew what it could possibly be, but I was still quite unsure.

Centuries ago before, the lands were divided into three kingdoms, Magehaven, Redmont and our Kingdom, Northollow. No one ever knew the true story of how these kingdoms came to be, everyone had a different version where the kingdom was better than the other and trying to take over the other two so that one of us could finally rule over all the three lands once again. And this is why my parents were always worried if I became Queen, would I be able to control the situation all by myself and I assured them that I will do my best to deliver as per the exceptions of the people.

"Everybody out." He ordered as he rubbed his temple with the tips of his fingers, slouching on the leather chair. If grandma or grandpa were here they would immediately reprimand him for his current posture. "And Leah," he turned to his secretary, "can you please clear the schedule for the rest of the day?" She nodded, before leaving you and your father alone to converse. His demeanor really made me worry, sure being a king was hard but this look very serious. "Is something wrong?" I asked softly, as I fiddled with the fabric of my dress. "You might want to sit for this darling." He motioned me to the chairs opposite his desk to which I obliged.

"Now what I am about to tell you, I am telling you not only as a father to a daughter but also as a king to the next heir," you nodded. He took a deep breath and began, "As you know our neighboring kingdoms have been at war for centuries, but yesterday I received a letter from the kingdom of Redmont." He said, opening the drawer and removing said letter.

"What does it say?" You asked.

"It seems they were attacked terribly last week by the kingdom of Magehaven. And now they are on the brink of extinction, so they want to form an alliance with us, they are ready for us to take over their kingdom in order of the survival of their people." And in case you didn't know, the king of Magehaven wanted to take over all three kingdoms, but neither of the kingdoms allowed that because he was a very cruel ruler. Almost every week we had refuges and people migrating to our land in hope of solace, which they did find. My father was very kind so as to welcome them with open arms.

"So what have you decided?"

"I was thinking of agreeing to it, but I had to consult you first, since you are of age and soon will take over me I have to make sure you, as future queen will be able to handle it." I was shocked, I couldn't believe, my dad finally thinks I am able to take decisions? "Dad I think I will be alright, you should go ahead and form the alliance." I gave a tight lipped smile, which he reciprocated.

"Are you sure?" I nodded, I knew he could never make any decision that would harm me. "But there's one more thing," he continued, "since the attack ruined almost their entire land, the royal family will be coming over to stay in our castle, while the refugees settle in town."

"That would be lovely, dad," I beamed at him.

"They will be arriving by tomorrow so I took the liberty of cancelling your classes for the rest of the day." he grinned.

"Oh, thank you!" I jumped out of my seat and hugged him.

"Okay, you can leave now, I still have some work to get to."

"I'll see you at dinner." I said, heading for the door.

"See you- Oh and Y/n?" He called out, "The heir of Redmont, Prince Harrison will also be arriving, so you might have some company." He smirked. My eyes widened, it had been so long I had seen him. Was I scared or nervous? Who knows, maybe this won't be as bad as I hope it would. As I was leaving I saw mom coming my way to dad's office, she seemed a bit calm but hurried in the room, I wanted to snoop around and see what was the emergency but I remembered I had to go to the stables to see Spencer.

"And?" Mom asked worriedly, "What did she say?" But dad stayed silent. "You didn't tell her did you?"

"It's too much for her."

"We have no choice, you have to confront her okay?" He nodded.

General Taglist: @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @peaches-parker @mischiefmanaged011 @hollanderfangirl @parkerpeter24 @whatthefuckimbisexual @yourstrulyamour @felicityparkers @theonly1outof-a-billion @miraclesoflove @theliterarymess @osterfieldholland01 @spideyssunshine @zspideyy @chillingonlife @yousayironisayman

Harrison Osterfield Taglist: @hjoficrecs @euphorichxlland @asshatgrace @anissalime @just-lost-inbetween-worlds

Betraying the bond taglist: @in-some-fandoms @frenchfrostpudding @sheranatic111 @calltothewild @kickingn-ames @tomhollander96 @minejungwoo @hollandbroz-n-haz @multific @emistrash @thisetaernallove @angelsgrxzer @hellomadambutterfly @britishvamps @falconxbarnes @bicyhot1

Strike through means I couldn't tag you

[sociallyawkwardfoxwriter]

Whumptober Day 17 - "Please don't move!"

All he wanted to do was sleep. Even when his insomnia was at its worse, he never felt the desire to sleep as bad as he currently did. It felt like every cell in his body screamed at him to do just that, but a quick glance to his left provided the perfect reminder of why he couldn't. While he would never claim to have any sort of medical background, they prepped him with enough field training to get by when necessary. He could only hope his limited knowledge would be enough to keep Piers stable until their backup arrived.

As if sensing eyes on him, the previously unconscious body began to shift, then eyes clouded by sleep opened. After taking stock of his surroundings, Piers's next move would have been to sit up if it weren't for the firm hand Leon pressed to his chest. Confusion grew when Piers moved his gaze from the hand to a face he probably didn't expect to see. For a moment, he simply stared at Leon while his pain addled mind struggled to put together what he saw.

“Leon? What happened? Where's Chris?”

“You got separated from your fearless leader. Last I saw, he was running around putting together the pieces to all those stupid puzzles. I'm sure he's fine.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Don't sound too excited about seeing me.” Fully satisfied that Piers wouldn't tried to sit up again, Leon dropped back to lean against the side of the pit. “Umbrella did what they always do, and I have to clean it up as per usual. I'm guessing you're here for the same reason.”

“We were in the area. Heard reports of B.O.W.s. Went to check it out.”

“One of these days the DSO and BSAA will learn to communicate, until then I'll continue to enjoy quality time with my husband.”

“You consider this quality time?”

“No. I'm not spending time with Chris, so it doesn't count.”

“Good to know where you draw the line.”

Despite Piers's attempts to mask the pain, every word held little hints that Leon read easily as a book. “Keep breathing.”

“Yeah. You still haven't told me what happened.”

“I watched you get backed into this trap, so I came to save you. You can see how that went. You're too injured to move without help. I patched you up the best I could, but we'll need Chris to get you out of here.”

“It's not that far. I can do it.”

“No.”

“I can.”

“Don't move, Nivans.” The sharp clip of his voice coupled with the pressure of a firm hand to Piers’s chest brought his attempts to move to a grinding halt. “Please, don't move. I'm not a field medic. I did what I could, but you're not bleeding out and your leg is stable. There's no telling what will happen if you try moving it. If it gets worse, I don't know that I'll be able to help. We're going to stay right here and wait for Chris.”

“You could go find him.”

“Do you really expect me to leave you alone? There's a reason you and Chris get along so well. You're both too stubborn for your own good.”

“Are you saying you don't trust me to stay here like a good boy?”

“That's exactly what I'm saying.”

“I can follow orders.”

“From your captain. I wasn't born yesterday, so I'm staying right here to make sure you don't move.”

His aggravated huff might have landed better if the end of it didn't turn into a wheeze of pain as his leg spasmed. Even though he didn't think much would come of it, he quickly moved to check the bandage wrapped around Piers's leg. While it didn't look any worse than it had before, the bandages were soaked in blood and the wound still wept when he pulled the bandage away. To his frustration, rewrapping it led to the end of his bandage supply and any possibility of doing it again if Piers bled through a second time.

“Brace for me.”

“For what?”

“It hasn't stopped bleeding and I'm out of supplies. I'm going to apply pressure.”

After taking a deep breath, Piers balled his fist up in preparation for the pain and gave a jerky nod. “Do it.”

“Deep breath for me.”

“Just-” The sharp inhale biting back a scream cut off the rest of his sentence, then came a low groan. “Fuck!”

“Keep breathing. This will all be a waste if you don't keep breathing. Plus, it will upset Chris and a certain someone that-”

“Shut up.”

“One of these days the two of you are going to figure your shit out. I'm not spending the rest of my life listening and watching you dance around each other. If you want my advice, own up to your feelings. In our line of work, there are too many things to regret for that to be one.”

“And if I regret doing it?”

“It's either worth trying or it isn't. That's for you to figure out. If you're worried about things ending poorly, you can always punch him in the face for being an asshole.”

“Is that what you planned to do to Chris?”

His sudden laughter nearly caused his hands to shake, but he held that back before it could cause Piers pain. "Something like that, but it doesn't matter. We figured out how to make us work. Even took the time in our busy schedules to sign all the paperwork to make it official.”

“Is it hard?”

“Which part?”

“Being away from each other so much. I'm pretty sure I see Chris more than you do.”

“It's...” Slowly, he eased the press on Piers's leg, then continued to lift them away when the blood didn't rapidly blossom across more of the bandage than it already stained. “Worrying about the unknown is the worst, not that I have any room to talk on that. He has you and other BSAA soldiers watching his back. Plenty of support there to help him stay alive, but I still worry. It takes one wrong move. Doesn't matter how many people are watching your back.”

“Do you ever regret it?”

“Never. He's my rock.”

“I'd say he feels the same about you, but you know how he is about rocks.”

“That's fine. It's a rock and a hard place, right?”

“What got caught between you?”

“Umbrella.”

The sound of familiar footsteps against the ground above them eased some of the tension in his body and brought a sigh of relief from him. “Leon?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for helping and giving me a new perspective. He worries about you too, but he always says you're the most capable person he knows.”

“You're welcome. Let's get you out of here. We can't have you bleeding out before you get the chance to make up your mind.”

[devinescribe]

Found You

Part 8 to '100 Promises'

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Warnings: swearing, I think that's it

"Oh shit... agh, brainfreeze," you cursed, holding your head. It was a hot summer afternoon, and you had decided to get ice cream with Niragi. "Dumbass," he laughed, watching you groan in pain. You glared at him, the pain going away. "Fuck off," you said, going back to slowly licking at the ice cream. He shook his head, laughing slightly.

He made his way through the hole in the wall. No, it wasn't a hallway, a literal hole in the wall. It went through and led into the kitchen. He had found out about it once when he saw Last Boss come out of it during one of his patrols. He followed it, and saw were it lead. By process of elimination he had narrowed down the other player of the game to be Last Boss. So, in a general assumption, he assumed you would be in the kitchen. It was dark as he made his way through it, hoping to get out of it as soon as possible. It gave him a bad feeling. Why was there a random hole in the wall leading to the kitchen? It seemed awfully strange to him. Like something out of a horror game when the monster jumps out to attack you. "Oh hell no, damn my thoughts straight to hell," he cursed, walking faster through the tunnel.

Finally, he was at the entrance to the kitchen. It was covered up by a couple things, but, he managed. When he did he heard you giggling about something.

"You know, I think this was a great idea," you giggled, nibbling on one of the cookies. "I know of quite a few places to hide if you ever need one. It can get... loud... hectic... and chaotic here," Last Boss responded. You smiled. You were about to bite the cookie again, before arms were around you. In the moment, you panicked, grabbing the person back and flipping them onto their back. You quickly grabbed the knife you'd picked up earlier, pointing it them, before noticing it was Niragi. You let out a relieved sigh. "Ow... that hurt," he groaned, sitting up, holding the back of his head "Sorry. Don't sneak up on me like that," you said. He smirked. "That makes 1,853 games of hide and seek in a row I've won. 8 year winning streak," he bragged, obviously over getting hurt. "Oh go fuck yourself, you whore," you insulted, flipping him off, sticking your tongue out. You turned to Last Boss and smiled. "It was nice hiding with you," you said. Said man was confused on how you kept switching between your emotions so quickly. "Oh... uh, it was nice... hiding with you too, I guess," he responded. You laughed, holding a hand out to Niragi. He grabbed onto you, and you helped him up. "See, I'm a bitch, but at least I'm just a bad bitch, not a heartless bitch," you laughed. He smiled a bit. Standing in the kitchen with you talking, the warmth. Even Last Boss was talking to you. Everything about it felt like home. Home felt like you. Home felt like the feeling he got whenever he was with you. Maybe it was because you were home.

He watched as you talked avidly with Last Boss. You two seemed to get along, which was good. "Shit, it's already 12 am? Don't we have a supply run thingy tomorrow?" You questioned, finally noticing the time. "Uh... yeah," Niragi responded. "At least were not drunk... then Aguni might have a problem," Last Boss said. Both men shuddered, remembering what had happened last time. "Ooh, spill!" You said, sitting on top of one of the counters. Last Boss shook his head, and Niragi looked away. "Was it that bad?" You asked, a smirk building it's way across your face. "One thing you'll notice about Aguni is... he's like... a military dad. He's strict, but also doesn't care at the same time? But there's rules. And since there's few rules, it's not like you can forget. So... yeah," Niragi explained. "Can't wait to actually meet this man and see if you guys are exaggerating," you giggled. "Alright, get off the counter so we can go to your room," Niragi sighed, stretching his arms. "Carry me?" You asked, hiding your laughter. "Last time you said that, we both fell down the stairs," he reminded, rolling his eyes. "That's because you have weak noodle arms you lanky bitch," you said, laughing. "Ahahahaha fuck you."

You three finally made your way up the stairs. "So, does everyone just... party the whole night?" You asked, seeing as there was no on really in the lobby, but you could still hear the heavy bass of the loud music playing outside. Niragi nodded. "Fun for them, annoying for those who actually try to sleep," Last Boss commented. It was really just a paradise for people. A safe haven for players. And why wouldn't it? There's protection, other people, food, supplies, electricity. Anything you could want or need was at the Beach. It was curious how they managed to put it all together. So well thought out.

"Well... goodnight," you said, opening the door to your new room. "I'll wake you up tomorrow. By any means necessary," he stated, disappearing into his room. You sighed, closing the door behind you. It felt the same, but it was different. You knew that it would be hard to adjust, but a part of you had already adjusted. Maybe it was the years of torture through your childhood, or the things you put up with in your day to day life, but this didn't feel weird at all. It felt... normal. Besides the games, no negatives were really made clear to you. So, what was so bad about being here? It seemed better than your normal life. You sighed, shaking your head. You shouldn't be thinking like that, your life before was just fine with Niragi. You thought you had lost him. But, then you found him here. So even in places of despair and chaos, you could find a silver lining. "Ick... that sounds cheesy," you muttered, getting under the covers of the bed. The second you laid down, all the pain in your body was alleviated. The pillows were cold under you, the bed soft. You let out a satisfied sigh. If this was what staying at the Beach was like, you wouldn't mind. But, you also couldn't let yourself fall into that mentality. Your eyes drooped slowly, sleep taking over your body.

"And how was your date?" You asked as soon as he walked into through the door. "We never speak of her again," was all he said with a groan. "Goddamn, that bad? What did she do?" You questioned, as he walked over to the couch, sitting besides you. "Well, at first, she was ok. Then she immediately went into the topic of money, which like big red flag, but I didn't care. Right after we started talking about friends and family. I brought you up, and she was all like 'no, you see, that's not going to work because I have to be the only special girl in your life' and I was like, well... jealous much? I don't know who hurt her but it's... ugh," he groaned. Niragi had never been interested I'm dating per se. He didn't have any interest in anyone all throughout high school, which was one of the reasons people thought you two were together. "What about you? How'd it go?" He asked. "Not great. He was narcissistic, misogynistic, and rude. Like... 'women belong in the kitchen' kind of misogyny. God it was horrible. A total incel of a boy," you explained, shaking your head. "Looks like we both have trouble with dating, hm?" He said, leaning his head back, staring up at the ceiling, following the cracks in them. He'd always suggested you two move, especially with the occupation both of you had, you could afford to move somewhere else. You'd always tell him to wait a couple years because you never know what could happen. You had always said, "What if you meet the person of your dreams and decide to move in with them?" He never thought much about having someone else. It was always (Y/N) and Niragi against the world. It seemed weird to his mother last time she had called to ask about that. He'd told her the same thing. "No one really... interests me. No one ever has."

Now, his mother was a person who changed herself for the better. She had never had the courage to leave her husband, his father, however. She observed her son's behavior, and asked him something that really made his mind question itself. "Do you think no one interests you... because you like (Y/N)? In a more than friend way, I mean." He had never thought about that. At all. He had only ever known kindness from you, and his mother later in life. So, did he? He couldn't have. It would be wrong, wouldn't it? To insinuate such a thing to you?

Screaming, heat, fires, crumbling debris all around you fell. The smoke and ash heavy in the air. " 'Ragi?! What's going on?!"

Shattered glass stuck onto your arms, blood dripping onto the asphalt. "You can't leave me... you can't, not again!"

Wake up.

"(Y/N), you can't leave me now..."

"I can! What the hell made you think that was ok!"

Wake up.

"You're bleeding!"

"No shit Sherlock. It's called getting shot. Somehow, I just can't seem to die."

"Don't fucking say that!''

Wake up.

"Oi! Wake up!"

"Don't leave me-! What the hell? What's going on?"

"It's time to wake up. We have a supply run to do.''

[that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick]

I've been so excited to write for the Mystic Messenger Reverse Big Bang 2021 (go check out other amazing fics and art in the collection at @mysme-rbb), and it's the first fanfic/art event I've participated in! @madiebelleadventures and I teamed up to brainstorm this beast, so her art is at the very end (because I ain't spoilin nothin)!

-

Rating: T

Word Count: 5.1k

Summary: One day after the end of a work week, Vanderwood surprises MC with some husband-wife baking time—with a twist. Inspired by his agent training, he suggests that they bake as a team but have MC blindfolded. In order to make a cake that's actually edible, she must follow his directions to the letter. All that's left after that is chaos, banter, and spouse-flustering. And figuring out how to actually make a cake.

A/N: Fyi MC is definitely more of her own character than a reader-insert on this one. Also as per usual with me, I headcanon Vanderwood as British, so I tried heavily to align his phrasing accordingly, despite being an American myself. Enjoy seeing exactly how much fluff I can possibly cram into 5k words!

MC sighed happily at the feeling of the wind in her hair as she drove home from work one Friday evening. Windows down, jacket off, music blasting—the air itself felt like freedom. She had nothing against her job—in fact, she enjoyed it for the most part. She prided herself in a job well done, she liked being able to manage a team of her own, and the paycheck and benefits were good. Nothing extravagant, of course, but enough to comfortably support a couple newlyweds.

And that was the real reason MC nearly jumped out the door every day when everything wrapped up at the office. Who wouldn't, with a husband as unfairly hot as Vanderwood? Completely unfair how he could make leopard print and what was practically a mullet actually look attractive. Thank goodness his fashion sense had mellowed out over time, if only a little bit. With Vanderwood's past being what it was, they had mutually come to the conclusion that it would be best for their well-being if he stayed at their apartment during the day to keep the household running. He was very particular about how he cooked, cleaned, and did the laundry, and he handled their finances conscientiously and precisely. Admittedly, she did have to occasionally remind him that as sleek as that new top-of-the-line taser was, there was no real need for it, but that was just part of her husband's charm.

And boy, was he charming.

She truly couldn't wait to get home, past this rush hour traffic. She'd get home and be pulled in for a deep kiss moments after walking in the door. Maybe he'd slip a gentle but insistent hand into her hair. Maybe they'd take it a little further. Or a lot further.

"HOLY FUDGE NUGGETS ON BACON ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME???"

MC swerved to avoid a collision and waited for her heartbeat to settle down again. There was no freaking way she was going to die in some stupid car wreck before their date tonight. A surprise, he'd said. No matter how hard she'd tried to weasel more out of him, he wouldn’t bend. Darn agent training. Good thing it wouldn't be a surprise for much longer. Within minutes, the streets got smaller and quieter as she neared her apartment building. Another minute, and she flung open the apartment door and leapt on her husband.

MC's fantasies were soon replaced by an even better reality when Vanderwood's lips landed on hers. Kissing back enthusiastically, MC wrapped her arms around his middle so tight that a less sturdy man would be coughing for air. Vanderwood snatched her keys and purse and hung them by the doorway, never breaking his focus for a second. His kisses grew slower, but no less fervent, as he smoothed her wind-strewn hair. Eventually, their lips reluctantly parted, and MC broke the silence.

"How did I manage to snag the best kisser on earth on top of marrying the most insanely attractive man on earth?"

Vanderwood smirked. "Good taste, I guess." He kissed her once more soundly for good measure.

"Maybe. Will my insanely attractive husband tell me what our surprise date is now?"

"Perhaps."

"No perhapses! I've been dying waiting!"

"Very well. Start by changing your clothes, because I am not scrubbing stains out of your good work clothes."

"Do I otherwise have to wear anything in particular? That's not a lot to go off of."

"Doesn't matter to me. Now go change before I do the job myself."

"I wouldn't complain."

"This is not that kind of date! Go!"

"Fine, Sir Panties-in-a-bunch."

MC went to the bedroom and took stock of her clothing options. She had to choose something practical that could be easily washed, but she still wanted to look a little cute. After all, it was a date. It was a tough balance to strike. Eh, she could always stick an apron or an old shirt over it. She grabbed her oversized paint shirt just in case before snagging a light pink shirt. Now for the bottoms. She debated on a simple skirt, but decided to go for it. After all, if it didn't fit with Vanderwood's plans, he would tell her. MC changed quickly and weaved her hair into a side braid, slipping a tendril out on each side to frame her face. Mirror-MC nodded in approval. Time to see what on earth her husband had been planning.

She cracked open the door and peeked through before skipping over to Vanderwood, who had made himself comfortable on the couch. His amber eyes widened in interest.

"You have no business looking this pretty for a baking date."

MC grinned. "Ha! I did get it out of you! A baking date sounds cute. What made you think of that? Are you just really getting into the whole house husband gig?"

"It was my agent training, actually." Seeing the puzzled look on his wife's face, Vanderwood continued, "There's a bit of a twist to it, you see. I will hardly be doing any of the actual baking. You, my dear, on the other hand, will be completely blindfolded. You will have to follow my instructions explicitly, or else the result will be completely inedible."

"I still fail to see how the setup doesn't sound like 'that kind of date', but it sounds like fun! What does this have to do with your agent training, though?"

"Various exercises used similar techniques. Many times in the field, we had to follow orders to the letter with no questions asked if we wanted to make it out in one piece. We also did training to be able to operate blindly or in the dark if our vision was compromised. But none of it was as enjoyable as watching a beautiful woman bake a cake by pure trust."

"You're such a flatterer. Keep it coming," MC smirked.

"At least get into the kitchen first," Vanderwood said, handing her a blindfold that looked suspiciously like his nap mask.

"Okay, but if you don't want me in the kitchen until I'm blindfolded, you're gonna have to get my apron yourself."

"I thought I was the one giving out orders tonight?"

"A girl's gotta get her kicks somewhere."

"Such a docile wife I have. Never difficult, never demanding."

"You think it's sexy. Don't even try to deny it."

"I would have filed for immediate divorce if the description 'docile' actually fit you." He stepped into the kitchen and emerged a moment later with the apron. MC slipped it on and, after ducking briefly into the bathroom to wash her hands, covered her eyes with the blindfold.

"I'm at your mercy now. Don't abuse that privilege."

He materialized behind her, winding his arms around her waist. "I wouldn't dream of it," he murmured into her ear before attacking her stomach. MC burst into uncontrollable giggles.

"I swear—!" she giggled "—I swear I'm going to punch the living daylights out of you!"

"You're certainly welcome to try. You know I wouldn't even feel it."

"But I could try. How am I supposed to trust you to give me decent directions to bake whatever the heck we're making if I can't even trust you not to tickle me?"

"You don't. That's the thrill of it."

"You'd better have me make something actually edible for all our trouble."

"That all depends on how well you follow my instructions."

"And how decent your instructions are. Let's not forget that tiny detail," she reminded.

"Hmm, we'll see," The smile was evident in his voice. "Now if we're going to start, we need to go ahead and do it."

"Probably."

He guided MC by her upper arms into the narrow kitchen.

"Fortunately," he said, halting and holding her in place, "we're only baking a cake and not an entire meal, so it won't take an eternity."

"I sure hope not! It's pizza night and I'm already a little hungry!"

He wound his hands around his wife's waist, lightly patting her stomach. "Well, the faster we start, the faster we can eat. I've already laid everything out for you as best I can, so you just have to follow my directions, all right, love?"

"Got it."

"All right, can you feel the worktop?" A nod. "Raise your right hand just a bit...and over…now grab the box with the cake mix, because heaven knows neither of us knows or cares enough to make it from scratch. Got it? Now open it up. The mixing bowl is straight to the left. Go ahead and pour it in."

"Just so you know, if I spill anything, you're the one taking responsibility."

"And why is that, darling?" Vanderwood asked, feigning shock.

"Because you're the one who had this idea in the first place! Not to mention if I make a mess it’s because of your faulty directions."

Unfortunately, MC failed to prove her point, pouring the mix into the bowl and barely spilling a few crumbs.

"Looks like we may not have to worry about that," Vanderwood smirked.

"You have met me, right? You know something's going to get spilled, right?"

Ignoring her, he moved the empty box toward the back and continued, "The milk should be right around where the cake mix was, if you can remember where you just were. The measuring jug is right next to it. Do you think you can pour it in correctly?"

"We'll see, now won't we?"

"There you go. Just try to take it slowly, just in case, and stop when I say so."

MC obeyed, gradually tilting the milk jug until a thin stream hit the center of the measuring cup.

"Brilliant! Now careful, careful, slightly to the left...that's it! Now slow down...almost done...stop!" He kissed her cheek. "That was amazing. Now pour it into the bowl."

MC felt around for the mixing bowl again. She managed to find it and poured in the milk. "Where's the cap for the milk jug?"

"Hm...where did it go? Oh, there it is. Right by the sink."

She batted at the air around her right side to find the inside of the sink. Instead, her hand bumped the side of the milk jug. Vanderwood's hand shot out to catch it, but a small puddle had already sloshed onto the counter. MC's hand shot up to take off the blindfold, but Vanderwood caught her wrist first. She sighed.

"Vandy, give it to me straight. How bad is it?"

"Not bad at all. I caught it before much got out. Stay put for a moment while I wipe it up so it doesn't start to smell or dry up."

"Not to say I told you, but I definitely told you."

Her husband stuck out his tongue at her—one of the few ways he had begun to let himself be childish lately. Then the obvious dawned on him. "I'm sticking out my tongue. I thought you ought to know that."

"Crucial information. Are you done yet?"

"Yep. You ready to get your hands a little dirty?"

"Isn't that expected in all this?"

"That's probably a large part of why you demanded an apron first, yes."

"You would be right about that, also yes. And you're so dramatic. I did not demand."

"Up to interpretation. Reach up to the left of the mixing bowl and just grab it off the plate and toss it in."

As instructed, MC reached over and let out a tiny shriek when her hand came into contact with the soft butter. Vanderwood guffawed.

"I was waiting for that."

MC gasped. "You did this on purpose!" She flung the butter into the bowl with an extra dash of vindictiveness.

"Maybe so. I like hearing your reactions," he purred.

"Don't try to be all smooth when you're being a twit. It doesn't suit you," MC sniffed, then muttered under her breath, "actually it totally works for you but it doesn't make me less ticked at you."

"By the way, don't bother trying to wash your hands just yet. The next part is probably going to be the messiest. I'll go get the bin so it'll be close by for you."

"Appreciated. What's the next part?"

"Eggs."

"Yikes, okay. That's why I needed the trash can, then. And where are the eggs?"

"To your left. You're going to need four of them. I read somewhere that adding an extra egg makes it better, hypothetically."

"You're the one giving the instructions."

"Alright, the bin is to your left, whenever you're ready."

"I could hear the thunk when you set it down, but thank you," MC said wryly.

"I live to serve."

There was silence for a moment as MC cracked the first egg into the bowl, and a soft smile rose on her face like the dawn. "Not anymore, you don't. I thank God every day that you and Saeyoung were able to free yourselves from the agency. I never could have forgotten you even if you hadn't, but I never would have known the immense joy I've gotten to have by being your wife." She sniffed, then laughed. "Sorry for being so sentimental all of a sudden, I don't know what got into me. It's just that knowing how many things could have gotten between us makes me that much more grateful for what we have."

"Ah!" Vanderwood shot a hand out to correct the second egg's trajectory into the mixing bowl.

"Oops, thank you."

"No problem, love. We're a team." He settled against her back, rubbing her arms lightly and placing a tender kiss on her cheek. "And never feel sorry for your so-called sentimentality. In fact, I really think you hold back sometimes. You shouldn't. I know that I used to scoff at these things, but locking out your emotions for job after job really takes a toll on a man. The agency had no room for love of any sort, and I've long come to the realization that every person is hardwired to desire love of one kind or another. I know I'm still unlearning all of my coping mechanisms, and I know I'm still sharp with some people, but with you?" He smoothed a hair back from her face. "I'll take whatever love you can give me."

She cracked the third egg into the bowl and threw out the shell. "I always knew you could be a softie, very deep down. I'm just glad that I get to be the one to see it."

After the fourth egg was in the bowl, Vanderwood directed, "Okay, time to wash up. The next thing is mixing for two minutes. While I love you, I do not trust you to use an electric mixer while blindfolded, so you're going to use a whisk for that job."

"I suppose that's fair. Can you put away the trash can while I wash my hands?"

"Already on it."

"Where's the whisk, again?"

"I kind of put it toward the back, so either be careful or wait for me to move a few things."

"Oh, I've got it. Don't worry," MC waved a hand in dismissal and groped around for the whisk, but her arm was a bit too low, and she dipped her clothed elbow in the plate where the butter had been. She sighed. "What did I just decorate my elbow with?"

"Butter. Try it. It might be tasty," he teased.

"Come on, Vandy, this is not the time. Help me get it off before it soaks in too much."

"Alright, alright, I just had to pick on you a little bit for not listening to me." He carefully scooped off the top layer of the butter with a paper towel before trying to absorb the rest. "I'm going to roll up your sleeves a bit more so that this hopefully won't happen again."

"Well, not until I slosh half the cake out of this bowl trying and failing to mix it."

"You'll be fine. Just stick to mixing the center and bringing the outside of it toward the center so everything gets mixed. But mix it well and mix it fast. The timer starts...now!"

MC held the bowl against her stomach to steady it while she mixed the batter vigorously. "Easy for you to say. You're not the one trying to mix furiously while keeping it all in the bowl on top of being blindfolded!"

"Calm down, you're doing great. A couple drips, maybe, but it's staying in."

"So far, anyway. But that's good, I guess."

"No guessing. It's quite good." Vanderwood leaned against the counter. "We've got a minute and a half to kill. Should I spend it telling you how you look right now?"

"Oh gosh, do I even want to know?"

He shook his head in near disbelief, smiling. "Magnetic. Adorable. More delicious than the cake we're making."

MC cackled. "You cannot be serious. I've got to be a mess right now."

"You act as if that's a contradiction. It's the mess that makes you more beautiful. Is every single hair of yours in place? No. But they fall around your face in the most delicately beautiful way. Even the places where the ingredients got smudged on you somehow add to your charm." He leaned in so that his lips touched her ear, his voice lowering to a gravelly timbre. "Did you know that your cheeks are all rosy from the effort you're putting into stirring? It's unbelievably attractive. And the way your lips press together when you're concentrating? It makes me want to kiss them apart. In fact—"

"Vanderwood, how much time is left?" MC interrupted, suppressing a vivid blush and a shiver.

"Our entire lives," he said, happily ignoring the real question.

"The timer, Vanderwood. How much is left on the timer?"

The sound of the timer going off answered the question for him. "None," he grinned. "I'll go spray the cake pan while you rest for a moment. You've earned it."

She exhaled, set the mixing bowl aside, and stretched. Then a thought made her panic. "Vandy, we forgot to preheat the oven."

He held her face in his hands. "MC. Darling. Breathe. I set the oven when I grabbed the apron."

Her breathing gradually slowed. "Sorry, love. I'm just really hungry and kind of tired and I think not being able to see is doing weird things to my brain and you kind of flustered me a minute ago with what you were saying and I'm sorry, I—" her voice cracked, but Vanderwood cut her off and held her close.

"Hey...hey...you're alright. There's nothing to be sorry about. I kept you going after a long day of work without feeding you first. I should have known better." He smoothed her hair and tucked it into her braid. "I'll tell you what. How about we get this cake in the oven and then order some pizza and watch another episode of Cucumber Fish?"

MC sniffled and hummed in agreement. Vanderwood loosened his hold around her and gently brought her hands to the bowl again before grabbing the cake pan. "Okay, all you've got to do now is pour it into the pan that I've put just to the left of the bowl. Just take it nice and easy. There you go. Perfect. You're almost done. Now let me get a spatula to scoop the last of it out." After he finished, he slid the cake pan into the oven and started the timer. "There. All done." He slipped the mask off her eyes and gave her a peck on the lips as she blinked to adjust to the light. "I'll clean all this up, alright? Go ahead and relax on the sofa. You can order the pizza and get Cucumber Fish queued up while I finish up in here."

"Okay," she murmured. Another peck, and she curled up on the couch. She pulled out her phone to order the pizza and smiled at the notifications she'd gotten from the RFA chatroom. They were up to their normal antics again. Hopefully, Saeyoung wouldn't exasperate Saeran too much with his crazy propositions. But there was nothing she could do about that, and she was starving and in desperate need of pizza. Once it was ordered, she turned on the TV and selected the episode, making sure to let it run past the ads before pausing it.

After Vanderwood joined her on the couch, the next forty-five minutes was filled with lots of cuddling and pizza devouring, more kissing than watching the show, a few glances at the cake's progress, an agreement to actually watch the episode while they ate the cake, and several minutes of cooling time after the cake was removed from the oven. Vanderwood emerged from the kitchen after a few minutes of setting up to decorate.

"Are you sure you want to put on the mask again?" he asked. "I don't want it to mess with your head like it did last time."

"I'll be fine, babe. I'm pretty sure it was like that last time just because I was starving."

"Are you positive?"

"Yes."

"If you say so. Go ahead and get them on, then," he said, handing MC the apron and mask.

"Just make sure to lead me into the kitchen again."

"Hmm, we'll see."

"We'll see?" she repeated, but shrieked soon after when she no longer felt the ground beneath her feet. Vanderwood had scooped her up to carry her into the kitchen bridal-style and sank his lips against hers with intentionality. He bumped into the counter but managed to avoid any damage to his wife. He deposited one last kiss on her lips before setting her down.

"What have you done to me, woman? Years and years of agent skills, undone in a moment. If it were anything or anyone else, I never would have bumped into that worktop. But when it's you kissing me, you're the only thing that exists." He grinned. "It's a shame, really. I thought my dexterity was an impressive skill, but I don't even have that anymore, it seems."

"Shame indeed," MC parroted, trying to steal another kiss from his lips and stealing one from his nostrils instead. She made a face, causing Vanderwood to laugh.

"Well, at least I still have the ability to order you around." MC smacked him in response, and he continued, "Alright, alright, let's get to it then. This is where it'll get really interesting, since decorating requires more precision. Which, no offense, is a skill you don't have, since you're not exactly used to being blind."

"Now wait just a—okay, I can't argue that," MC sighed. He placed a spatula in one hand and a jar of frosting in her other.

"Turn around. Can you find where the cake is?"

"Ye—wait, Vandy! I thought you said you cleaned up!"

"I did…sort of." Before she could protest, he interjected, "I wiped the worktop! I just pushed all the dishes to one side so we could put all of it in the dishwasher at once when we were done!" He added with a mumble, "I just wanted to get back to you."

"You think you can charm your way out of anything," MC responded airily. "Well, you're right." She squared up as best she could with a frosting jar in hand. "I found the cake. I'll try to do my best."

"Well, in this part, I won't let you go completely solo. I can rotate the cake for you as you go, if you want."

"Please."

MC scooped a large helping of frosting from the jar and started spreading around the perimeter. Her spatula made a slight detour for a moment to donate some frosting to the top of the cake, and Vanderwood halted and reversed his rotation slightly to avoid confusion. A few seconds later, she went for another, slightly smaller, scoop to finish frosting the circumference of the cake. Another scoop, added to the deposit from the first, finished off the top.

"Is there a big corner around the top edge? Or any dry spots?" she asked.

"Just a slight corner. Grab a little bit more frosting to round it off a bit and thicken the top."

She did as directed while he helped rotate, and stepped back. "Better?"

"Much better. Maybe we can add a little artistic touch by making some...what do you call them? Swoops? Around the sides from the top?"

"Sounds great. You're definitely going to have to help me, though."

"Alright, I'll rotate again and stop you when you're done. Then you can smooth off the top edge again quick."

Six slightly lopsided arcs later, he stepped back for a moment, observing. "This is certainly not the prettiest cake I've seen, but it all adds to the fun, yeah?"

"I guess," she laughed.

"Now here's the part that'll really get a laugh when you take off the blindfold. I've got a bowl over here with some frosting for smaller decorating, and you get to pick the food coloring that goes in it."

"Oh no."

"Oh yes," he snickered while guiding her over to a trio of colored bottles that she couldn't discern. "Take your pick," he said cheerily. MC gingerly selected one, and he suppressed a snort poorly. "Excellent choice!"

MC groaned. "I'm going to regret all my life choices, aren't I?"

"Of course not! Only your decision to marry me."

"Hey." She squeezed his wrist. "I could never regret that."

"You might reevaluate that statement when you take off the blindfold and see the cake. Or at least my ugly mug."

"Vanderwood. Don't you even start with me. You're so hot that if we were working with chocolate instead of a cake, we wouldn't need the microwave to melt it."

"You're so hot that the beach would need sunblock instead of you."

"You're so hot that the sun goes to you when it needs to warm up."

They collapsed against each other, gasping for air. Vanderwood caught his breath first. "Let's get this food coloring in the bowl, shall we? The spoon and frosting are already in it. All you have to do is put a few drops in and stir until I say so. The bowl's on your left."

"As you wish," she said as she did so.

After a few moments, he spoke. "That's enough. Let me get you back over to the cake, and I'll get the frosting in the decorating bag. Which is really just an ordinary plastic bag, but I did pick up some cheap decorating tips when I got the ingredients."

"Splendid. How am I going to decorate, though? Even if I could see, I don't know the first thing about cake decorating. Oh yeah, and I can't see."

"Don't get your 'panties in a bunch,' as you like to tell me so often. I'll do it with you this time."

"But you don't know how to decorate cakes, either!"

"Ah-ah-ah!” he chided. “Do you trust me or not?"

"Not particularly."

"Hey!"

"But! We should just go ahead and do it anyway, because even though neither of us knows what we're doing, we're the only ones in this apartment who can. And the frosting smells too good not to eat soon."

"That's my girl." Vanderwood curled around her. He molded one hand around hers and slid the other over her stomach. As they formed a few swirls on the top, he murmured, "We did this whole thing together. How impressive is that? Was it as fun for you as it was for me?"

MC smiled. "Of course it was. I know I got a little hangry for a bit there, but I know how much thought you put into this. None of my old deadbeat ex-boyfriends ever would have cared so much, let alone shown it. These are the things that make me love you that much more."

"I never experienced any permanent love until you showed it to me. And it's been so...world-altering—that I've been trying to wrap my head around it ever since. I still can't. But I swear I'm going to spend the rest of my life trying to give you the same love you've given me. I certainly don't deserve it, after the things I've done. But you do. You deserve all the happiness a person can have."

MC paused and blushed slightly. "Vandy…" She exhaled. "We've gone over this whole 'not deserving it' thing. Whether you deserve it or not doesn't matter. To me, what matters is your heart. You have such a beautiful heart, Vandy. I love the kind of man you've become. I've seen you strive every day to be better than you were the day before, and that is so inspiring."

"Well, whether or not I deserve happiness, I would choose to be happy every day if my being happy made you happy." He squeezed her hip affectionately and pulled her in for a tender kiss.

"It would." She kissed him back. They added one last swirl and a border before they set down the bag of frosting. He uncurled her fingers and fiddled with her wedding ring.

"Are you ready to see it?"

"Sure."

He slipped off the blindfold, and she gasped.

"What have we done?" she exclaimed as her laughing grew louder by the second.

"Whatever do you mean, dear?" Vanderwood asked, feigning ignorance.

"The cake is bright flaming orange, Vandy!" She let out a snort, then covered her face. "Hey, wait! All the food coloring was the same color too, you little twit!"

He shrugged innocently. MC sputtered. "Nuh-uh. Don't you shrug at me, mister. Saeyoung has rubbed off on you way too much."

"Has not."

She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, maybe the tiniest bit."

"Uh huh, that's what I thought. Now are you as ready as I am to eat this cake and watch Cucumber Fish?"

"Let me take a picture first. And another one with you in it? You look so lovely, I can't not have one with you in it."

She tried desperately to keep a frown on her face as he snapped a picture but couldn't quite hold back the quirk at the corner of her mouth. He cut a slice for each of them and handed one to her. He curled the paper plate around his slice, and she did likewise. They looked each other in the eyes, both knowing exactly what would come next. Vanderwood solidified his stance. "Ready...steady...GO!" The couple raced to the living room and took a running jump onto the couch, ready for the wonderful night ahead.