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#i like the slightly different look i like the hair down
saintobio · 1 day
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧ pretty tough, pretty dad
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pairings. sylus/qin che, fem!reader tags. 700+ wc, girl dad!sylus, mom!mc, domestic fluff, sylus braiding hair, suggestive ending, loosely inspired by sylus's grassland romance banner, dividers from anitalenia.
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“daddy, you’re so pretty!”
the sound of soft giggles erupted through the room as sylus sat cross-legged on the floor, his daughter perched on his lap, and her small hands holding up a brush and a few brightly colored hair clips. 
who would’ve thought that the boss of onychinus could transform into an entirely different man in these moments? sylus knew he couldn’t ever let luke and kieran see him at his current state, no. especially not when his white hair was a mess of star-shaped clips, and his face was full of tiny, sparkly stickers his little girl had ecstatically placed on him.
still, like the awesome daddy he was, he chuckled at his baby girl’s antics and carefully braided her hair, the movements precise yet gentle, despite the… well, occasional fumble. look, he wasn’t a professional by any means and the only practice he’d ever had was with you.
“pretty? i thought i’m supposed to be tough."
“nooo, daddy!” protested his four-year old. “you’re pretty and tough!”
he leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead before continuing to weave her hair into neat braids, like how he used to do with her mom. “well, if you say so, princess.”
and speaking of you, you were leaning against the doorframe at the time, watching the scene with an upward tug at your lips. it was moments like these that made you see another side to him—the side of sylus qin that no one else had ever seen. the man who was ruthless and intimidating to the world was, in the bright crimson eyes of his daughter, nothing but warmth and love.
“how’s it look?” sylus asked, tying off your daughter’s braid with a small ribbon.
“perfect!” the little girl exclaimed, clapping her hands before grabbing another hair clip, and this time placing it into her father’s hair. “now, you!”
“is it my turn, darling?” sylus raised an eyebrow but let her clip it in, allowing the glittery accessory to stand out comically against his pale locks. “you’re not going to make me wear these outside, are you?”
your daughter widened her grin in response, showing him exactly where she had gotten her mischief. “yes, daddy. duh!”
and so, he chuckled again, giving her a soft tickle that sent her into another fit of giggles. “all right, all right, princess. more stickers, too?”
“yes!” she grabbed the sheet of stickers, eagerly peeling them off and sticking them on his cheeks. sylus didn’t flinch, didn’t complain. he just let her do as she pleased, indulging in her every whim with a patience that surprised even you.
after a while, you came back to a room that grew quieter, and the giggles had long faded as your daughter yawned. sylus quickly shifted her in his lap, cradling her against his chest, and began to hum a lullaby
“mmmhm~ hmm~” truth be told, your husband’s singing was off-key, but you’d give him props for his sincerity and effort. and you couldn’t deny how your heart melted as you watched him sway slightly while he continued to sing even though his singing voice wasn’t the best. 
“good night, daddy…”  
“night night, princess.”
once she was fast asleep and carefully tucked in her small bed, sylus was quick to look for you in your room with a longing smile plastered on his lips. “honey?”
you met his gaze through the mirror as you dried your hair with a towel. “yeah?”
“you know,” he whispered as he walked towards you, the playful glint in his red eyes were impossible to miss, “my baby girl could use a little sibling. or two.”
“oh, does she?” you playfully rolled your eyes, feeling the heat on your cheeks as your husband snuggled his face into the crook of your neck. “and who’s going to wake up for the midnight feedings this time?”
sylus’s arms snaked around your waist, pulling you closer to his toned chest. “i will,” his breath was warm when he murmured against your ear, “you gotta admit i’m pretty good at this whole dad thing.”
you returned him a smile, turning around and leaning into his embrace as you glanced at the rise and fall of his chest. to think of it, since when did his arms become… meatier? “more babies, huh?”
“mm-hmm,” he hummed, pressing a soft kiss to the side of your neck, and chasing your lips the next. “imagine a house full of them—running around, giggling, driving you crazy… and me, of course.”
“we’ll see,” you whispered, unable to hide the smile that crept onto your face as he pressed a tender kiss to your lips. a gentle, innocent kiss that later became rough and wanton as his tongue explored your mouth with an eagerness that couldn’t be stopped. 
“oh, we will, honey,” he only replied as he pulled away, letting you pant in heavy breaths as he had you pinned against the wall, and about to plant the seed for the future he so clearly wanted. “and i’ll make sure you’ll see a positive test in two weeks.”
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arcadia-of-pluto · 2 days
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Casually calling them "daddy" LADS
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Word count; 1,913
Themes; slightly barely there suggestive content, fluff, established relationship
Warnings; mention of "daddy" ofc, fluff
Notes; So these turned out more fluffy than I originally intended...honestly, thought they'd be more smutty, but I've learnt that it's really difficult for me to write smut. Or at least, smut with little to no context before it all goes down. I might eventually write some smuttier drabbles, but regardless of smut, I hope you enjoy this little thing I wrote!
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You saw that there was an old trend about calling your boyfriend “daddy” and videoing their reaction so, obviously, you wanted to give it a try…
Xavier 
It's been almost a year since you and Xavier started dating– and it was a wonderful eleven months! He told you everything about himself. What his future with you was like, all of his feelings throughout the centuries, and you listened. You wholeheartedly believed him, because it would be one hell of a lie if it wasn't true…and you didn't think Xavier had the time or energy to come up with a complex lie like that. 
But even if you now know, time moves on. There's not much you can do about your future self, so you can't really change the future in that way though…Xavier's here now, in the past, and that's all that matters to you. 
Anyway, today was just a normal day as any. 
You were sitting at the counter, keeping a close eye on Xavier– who was attempting to follow, yet another, cooking tutorial. The man was desperate to cook a decent meal for you. His heart dead set on making you something edible for your upcoming year anniversary…and while that was cute, you also wanted to mess with him. 
You push your cup just out of your reach and make a big show of trying to reach for it, before sighing loudly. 
“Daddy, can you pass me my drink please?” 
You can hear the clang of a spatula hitting the floor and you watch Xavier’s body comically whip around to face you. 
“What?” His head cocks to the side as his wide eyes were set on your face. “Say that again..”
“Hmm? I said ‘Xav, can you pass me my drink, please’.” You copy his head tilt and he quickly shakes his head.
 “No, no you didn't.” He takes a few steps toward you before grabbing your hand in-between both of his. “Say it again.” 
You couldn't resist his sweet puppy dog eyes, so you hold back a smile as you meet his eyes. “I...called you daddy.” 
“Really?” He seems unusually excited. “So are we…?” His gaze lowers to your stomach and you can’t help the giggle that slips from your lips. 
Gosh, he was so cute. 
“Baby– no, no. We're not pregnant.” You run your fingers through his hair with a smile on your lips. “Are...you disappointed?” 
“Mmh..” Xavier hums thoughtfully for a moment before he shakes his head. “No. We can just make it a reality later. No need to rush.” 
Zayne 
You and Zayne have only been dating for six months, but it felt like much longer. Having known each other since you were little, you both had always been close– well, your definition of close and his were probably different. You always thought of him as a friend while he tried to keep a distance and thought you hated him. But time brought you both back together with him as your primary care physician. 
The two of you had been flirting up until his birthday and finally made it official once he blew his candles out on the cake you made for him. It was a sweet time, but that was six months ago. 
Now, though, you really want to fluster the man. 
He always embarrasses you and makes you feel nervous, but you never get to see him that way. Sure, his ears will turn red and sometimes he won't meet your eyes when you get too intense with him, but you've never seen him absolutely shocked. And you just wanted to see one look of surprise from him. 
So, what did you decide to do? 
You decided to casually call him "daddy” as a joke.
That should definitely go over well. 
Zayne is seated behind his desk at the hospital, sorting through papers as you longue on his sofa. Your eyes continuously glancing toward the windows to make sure the door was shut and the blinds were closed. 
“If you keep staring at the door, you just might burn a hole through it.” Zayne says, though he didn't even look up from his paperwork. He was attentive like that and probably already knew you wanted something or you were ready to go home. And he was right. 
“When are we going home…daddy?” You ask as you kick your feet in the air behind you. You were on your stomach, resting your cheek against your arms as you watched his expression…which didn't change at all. 
"Just give me a few more minutes, angel, and I'll be done.” Zayne pushes his glasses up with his index finger and clicks his pen, jotting down a few notes. 
“I–” You puff your cheeks out with a small sigh and decide to keep going with it. “I want to go home now, daddy.”
“Didn't I just tell you to be patient?” Now Zayne finally looks up at you with one of his brows raised. “I'll deal with you when we get home.” 
Rafayel 
It's been four months since Rafayel asked you out. Four months since you tugged Rafayel down into the bath with you, which set off a chain reaction of a steamy night, followed by him asking you out the next morning; he also complained that you both went out of order, but he wasn’t too upset when you continued where you left off…
Now, though, you moved out of your apartment and to Rafayel's home, ‘Mo Art Studio’ at Whitesand Bay. 
It was definitely odd at first, but it was a good change of pace. Always being by the ocean, able to take your morning walks together on the beach and collect seashells. You had a whole collection on your desk at work. He'd always give you the most unique and prettiest shells, saying “only the best for his cutie”. 
He was also so easy to fluster. 
You immediately knew you had him wrapped around your finger every time his ears would turn red. That same crimson slowly made its way from his ears to his cheeks, all the way to his whole face. So you assumed your little ‘prank’ would also have the same effect. 
You were sitting on a beach towel in the sand with an umbrella blocking your eyes from the bright sun. In front of you was Rafayel, painting your visage, with an easel. His hand deftly moves across the canvas as he sketches the outline for his new painting. 
Lately, you are the only thing he can paint. Always asking you to stop what you're doing so he can run and get his sketch pad. You could be doing something so normal and mundane, but he'd be struck with the inspiration to record your very image. 
As much as you loved it and thought this was very sweet, after almost two weeks of this…You wanted some form of payback. 
“Hey, daddy, can we take a break for a second? It’s really hot out here.” You squint your eyes to try and see Rafayel's face, your hand fanning at your body because you, seriously, are hot out here. 
“Huh?” 
It's like Rafayel is frozen in time, or buffering. He's just blankly staring at you with a confused expression on his face until his pencil drops into the sand. That's when he quickly stands up  and makes his way toward you. 
“Again.” 
Now, it's your turn to be confused. 
“Raf, what–” 
“Not that, say the other word again.” His ears were red as he crouched down in front of you, a look of determination in his eyes. 
“No– you're making it weird!” You put your hands on his shoulders, trying to put some distance between him as your face turns red. 
“Please, I really need to hear you say it again! I'm seriously going to die if you don't.” There's your overdramatic fishy. 
“Fine, but just this once.” You grumble, turning your head to look away from him. “Daddy…” Though you say it as low as you can and Rafayel groans, tilting his head back. 
“Louder.” He rests his forehead against yours. “Come on, cutie. If you don't…I might want to change that to my new nickname.”
Sylus
It's been about…a year? Yes, definitely a year since you and Sylus started dating. Well, you both have differing opinions on when exactly you started dating. Sylus claims it was the moment he laid eyes on you in the N109 Zone, while you claim it was only about six months ago– which is when you and Sylus made a bet. 
It was a bet where if he came back safely from his mission, he'd leave you alone. He wouldn't bother you anymore, wouldn't talk to you, contact you, anything of the sort…and you won, but you didn't realize he'd actually do it. So whenever you seeked him out to make sure he was safe, and he ignored you, you realized that maybe you did want him in your life. 
This led to you running across the street to him and jumping into his arms like this was a hallmark movie, and you claim this was when you officially started dating Sylus.
But between us, you just agree with Sylus when he says a year, because if you don't, he'll pout for the whole day. 
...And today was one of those ‘pouty Sylus’ days. 
You went on a mission that was probably way too dangerous, even though you told Sylus you were going to slow down on your Hunter's work. But you couldn't just ignore endangered civilians. If any of them would have died, that would've been too much for your sympathetic heart to handle. 
And even if Sylus understands your reasoning, he's still upset that you left without telling him– having woken up to a cold bed without you by his side sent him spiraling into a panic. 
So, when you got home, you noticed he was sulking in the kitchen as he made dinner. 
“Sy…” You take your shoes off by the door, nervously fiddling with your fingers as you tentatively walk into the kitchen. Standing behind the counter, you sigh, “I'm reeaally sorry...” 
“If you're reeaaally sorry, then help me make our dinner.” He says, not looking up at you and that doesn't make you feel any better. 
“Okay..” You finally step past the counter and you look around. “So…what do you need?” You were trying to figure out something– anything that could make Sylus feel better when a thought comes to your mind. 
Most guys probably like it when their girlfriend calls them daddy…right? 
“In the cabinet, top shelf. I need a bottle of garlic powder.” 
Okay, you got this. 
You take a deep breath and open the cabinet, straining your arm to try and reach the seasoning bottle, but your fingertips barely brush it and knock it over. “Shit…” You swallow back your nervousness before continuing, “Daddy, can you grab it for me?” 
The room fills with silence for a moment, but then you hear Sylus chuckle. 
“Sure, kitten.” 
Your back suddenly feels warm as a firm chest presses against it and Sylus reaches up from behind you to grab the bottle. 
“I ask you to do one simple thing and you can't even do that.” Sylus chides, clicking his tongue as he pops the bottle open to pour some into the pan on the stove. 
“Da–”
“If you think a few empty words will make me feel better, kitten…you've got to try a lot harder than that.” 
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I'd like to say, this is definitely one of my better drabbles– one of my favorites, in fact!
I have like...six more ideas for drabbles and then I'll need to come up with some more. Like these new cards and Rafayel's student photoshoot event really had me thinking of how seriously the LADS men would take roleplaying– and that spawned a whole different drabble idea, so you can definitely look forward to that!
I'm trying to come up with new ways to do my drabbles, so that's why I did a little prelude before I started writing for the guys. Please let me know any feedback yall have for me! Especially with the coloured dialogue, I'm not too sure if I like it, but it seems really pretty and probably makes it easier to tell who is talking apart. (I won't use it for my fic though, only the drabbles!)
Anyway, I have a small personal project I'm working on this weekend so I probably won't be able to write any chapters for my 'Divisa' fic, but I'm still going to post chapter nineteen of 'Twist of Fate' and try to write at least two more chapters since I'm only on twenty-three or so.
I hope you all enjoyed these drabbles and I hope yall have a great night/day! 🩷
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clockwayswrites · 1 day
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City Pigeons Bleed Green Part 21
CW: discussions of mental health and past temporary character death Masterpost
“Hey Dandelion, do you have everything?” Dick asked as he peered into Danny’s room— or the room that Danny had been using since they moved to this safe house.
Now that they were moving to the Manor, Danny would be getting his actual room with the rest of them in the family wing. For those that had moved out, the Manor wasn’t their only home, but it was still home and their room was still their room. Or at least for Dick and Cass. Jason… Dick knew that it was still harder for Jason.
Thinking about it now, Dick didn’t know if he’d actually ever seen Jason actually sleep in his childhood room again. Jason was always up first, helping Alfred in the kitchen on the rare nights that he stayed over. Once Dick had fond Jason still asleep in the library, book still in hand. Maybe it was something to change. Maybe it could change, now that Danny was there to bring up the conversation.
“Danny?”
“Sorry,” Danny said with a slightly water smile. His little brother was clutching his blue bear, as he almost always was these last few days. “I, um, yeah, I think I have everything.”
Dick sat down on the edge of the bed next to Danny. “But?”
“But?” Danny repeated. His brows crunched up adorably.
Dick leaned over to bump their shoulders together. “But you don’t seem happy. If this is all too soon, we can delay.”
Danny gave a little, unhappy snort. “You all keep delaying for me. I didn’t want to meet Bruce so you kept him away. I didn’t want to tell you things and you all still haven’t made me.”
“We want you to be comfortable and feel safe.”
“I do,” Danny insisted. “I have and I… and I still ran, didn’t I? I was safe and cared for and I ran. And now I don’t want to leave here. That’s so stupid of me!”
“It’s not—”
“It is!” The words seemed to choke Danny. “It is. I trust you! I trust you and Hood and B.B. and I… I still can’t! I want to tell you, but I still can’t…”
Dick wrapped Danny up in his arms, pulling his brother tight against his chest and cradling Danny there as he sobbed. There had been a lot of tears in the last few days, and Dick knew that there would be many more. He didn’t try to shush Danny, just kept him held close until the tears ran out.
“Sorry,” Danny mumbled against Dick’s damp shirt.
Dick took a moment to think of his words. “This family is bad about trauma, which isn’t great because we have a lot of it. But we all know it. And… and you can feel completely safe and still have part of you that’s terrified because of the trauma. That if you speak it or face it or acknowledge it the trauma will suddenly have so much power over you and… and all the worst things that you fear in the dark quiet of the night will be true. It makes you fear that the same people you’re safe with and love you will look at you differently or blame you. And… um…”
He needed a moment to breathe, face buried against Danny’s dark locks, as his own monsters reared up. “And there are people who might. But not… not us. We have been through so much as a family and no mater what we’re still family. And you’re part of that too now, Danny. So it’s okay to be scared or sad or not tell us things, but none of that changes that you’re family. If we argue or get annoyed or cry we’re still family. So don’t be sorry. Please, don’t be sorry for any of it because I don’t want you to be sorry for being family, okay?”
“Okay,” Danny said, breath choked but words still sure. “Okay.”
Dick carded gentle fingers through Danny’s hair. “Look at it this way, you’ve already tamed Damian. That’s a big step in this family.”
Danny’s snort of laughter was slightly lost with the way his was still buried against Dick’s chest. “I don’t think Damian can ever be tamed. He’s like one of those… whatchamacalls it. Those tiny desert cats with the highest kill ratios for predators. Small and kitten shaped but still very wild.”
“Yeah, okay, maybe you’re right. Adorable and stabby is pretty accurate,” Dick agreed. “But it’s going better than it did with Tim! You should ask him about it— actually, you know what, don’t. Don’t ask about it. Water under the bridge. Bloody, bloody water.”
“…what?”
“Yep, never mind! Okay. Let’s double check you have everything,” Dick said, hauling them both bodily to their feet.
When in doubt, distract.
-
Alfred was struck silent when he opened the door. That was not something that happened often and in fact his sharp tongue was something that Alfred prided himself on. But in that moment, he was without words.
Young Daniel looked so distinctly like Bruce at that age, down to the haunted look of desperate hope waging battle against a highly rational mind, that Alfred was thrown back into times past. Back then, even half a decade after past Thomas and Martha’s death, Alfred still had no idea how to handle a child. At least now he had more of an idea.
“Welcome home, Master Danny,” Alfred said and stepped aside to let the newest Wayne enter the Manor.
Master Dick and Master Jason flanked the boy like towering honor guards.
“I am Alfred Pennyworth, and you may call me Alfred, or Alfie if you must. Master Jason certainly seems to prefer it,” Alfred said with a fond look Jason’s way. “If there is anything you need, at any time of day or night, to feel more comfortable here you simply need to ask me. It is my duty and honor to serve this family, which very much includes you.”
“I— ah, thank you, Alfred,” Danny said softly. He was quiet in a different way than young Bruce had been and the Bristol accent was almost shockingly absent, even though Alfred had known it wouldn’t be present.
“Of course. Now, lunch is in about an hour. I thought perhaps you might like to settle into your room a little before the meal,” Alfred said and turned slightly towards the stairs.
Danny obediently fell into step. That behavior was much more like Tim’s had been when he first arrived. Alfred tucked that thought away with the rest.
“You are in the family wing, of course. Master Bruce, Master Duke, and Master Damian are the other permanent residents of the manor. While the others still have their rooms, they come and go,” Alfred explained as they made their way to and up the stairs. “We have put together a room that we hope will be suitable for you, but anything that isn’t to your liking, we can easily change it.”
“We’ll go shopping in a few days too,” Dick said. “We can grab some things then that you might like for the walls and desk.”
“I’m sure it will be fine,” Danny said quickly.
“Fine’s not the goal, kid,” Jason said. “The goal is to make this home.”
Danny was silent in response to that. Alfred made another mental note to check in with Danny about the room a few times and possibly even to suggest items.
“Master Bruce’s room is at the end of the hall,” Alfred explained when they reached the top of the stairs. “Master Dick’s on the left and Master Jason’s on the right of it. This way we have Master Tim’s and Miss Stephanie’s. While she is not family, there have been enough nights she has stayed over to warrant the space. Miss Cass’, Master Damian’s, Master Duke’s next and this is yours, Master Danny.”
Alfred opened the door to the room with a little bow. As with every room in the manor, it was fitted with a bed, two side tables, a dresser, and a credenza all in the same dark wood. There had thankfully been enough time to paint the walls a two tone blue and bring a desk from one of the other rooms. The star project sat on the desk next to the basic supplies and an air diffuser. Already the room smelled softly of sandalwood. The bed was dressed in blues and creams with an extra, luxuriously soft blue blanket draped across the foot of the bed.
Danny stepped into the room almost cautiously.
Alfred moved back to give Danny room and took an even breath. Danny would settle with time.
“Lunch in an hour,” Alfred reminded the trio of Wayne boys as he took his exit. He’d best made sure that Danny’s first meal here was a fine one. After all, this would be home.
-
Dick entered the library quietly. He might be there to actively disturb Jason, but he didn’t have to be rude about it. Besides, it was nice to see Jason settled in an armchair, curled up slightly around a book. It was easy to see the little kid that Jason used to be like this.
(Dick made himself shake that vision away.)
“So,” Dick started as he settled in, arms crossed, against the back of the armchair across from Jason, “Danny’s first day in the manor seemed to go alright.”
Jason looked up from the book with a soft frown. “Yeah. We’ll see how tonight goes. Worried about nightmares for him. Just since it’s a new place and all.”
“I could see that happening,” Dick agreed. “Luckily we’ll all be close up upstairs if he does have one. You and me will just have to work not to run into each other as we bust out of our rooms.”
Jason’s fingers scrapped lightly against the pages of the book as he fanned them, gaze away from Dick and uneasy.
“Jason—”
“What did you mean about hallucinating?”
Dick’s intended question crashed to a halt against the roof of his mouth as he snapped it closed. What? When had he said…
“Um,” Dick cleared his throat to get rid of the lingering pile up. “What now?”
“When Danny ran, after your panic attack you said you were good, you weren’t at ‘the hallucinating stage yet’.” Jason looked up, pining Dick with that forever green tinted gaze. “What did that mean, Dick?”
It was Dick’s turn to look away as he scrambled to make a new plan of how to approach this. He’d never… how he was after Jason’s death, how it had broken him… that wasn’t something Dick ever wanted to burden Jason with. Bruce’s own lapse of sanity, Tim ending up in the Robin suit, Dick knew how those things weighed on Jason. As if it had been Jason’s fault he died. Dick breathed out a slow, measured breath. Guess there was no avoiding it now.
But Dick wasn’t going to let that information go without using some of it to his own favor. “Fine, I’ll explain but you have to stay and talk through the question I have for you too, deal?”
Jason took a silent moment. “…yeah, fine, deal.”
“Okay. Right. Um…” Dick rubbed his hands together, then circled the armchair and sat lightly down on the edge of the too soft cushion. Had the rich green fabric always been so itchy? “So, it’s nothing major, really, just that I have, before— at just one period actually— when I really stressed and too emotional about things, maybe had some hallucinations. But! But, I knew h—they were hallucinations and not real. It wasn’t like I was listening to the voice telling me to do anything or following after someone who didn’t exist or anything! It was— I dealt with it. It was fine. It hasn’t happened in a long time now.”
“You were hallucinating.”
“Yes.”
“A person.”
“Yes.”
“You could see them and hear them? Jesus, Dick,” Jason said, abandoning his book to rub at his face. “How bad was it? Did they talk back? Did you talk back? Did—”
“Yes! Okay, yes!” Dick exploded out of his chair. “Yes I could hear them. Yes I could see them! Yes he could talk back! Yes I talked back to him! Of course I talked back to him. You… you were gone, little wing. You were gone and I didn’t think— who could have thought you’d come back? You were gone and I know… I know he wasn’t real. I know he wasn’t you, but how I was I going to turn away any chance to talk to you when you were gone? Even when it was just… just my mind being cruel.”
“Me? You were— Dick, you were seeing me?”
The armchair cushioned Dick’s heavy fall back into it.
He shrugged.
What could he say to that? What could he say other than another torn ‘yes’?
“Jesus fucking… Dick.” Jason sounded torn.
Dick didn’t want to look up to see his brother’s expression.
Apparently Jason wasn’t having that because a moment later he was crouched in front of Dick, forcing himself into Dicks view.
“It’s not your fault,” Dick said quickly. Even as Jason’s large, calloused hand came to rest on his cheek Dick kept talking. The words needed to come out. “I just handled coming back from space and the mission to the… to the news badly. And Bruce was in a state. He’d ripped down every photo of you like just seeing your presence would break him and I think it would have! I know you— I know there are issues with you two and I’m not invalidating that, but he was so close to breaking and I was just angry about it all. And then Alfred put up that damn suit in that case like that and all I could— all I could see was the little brother that I’d never gotten to show how happy I was to have… and then I did see you. In a way. It just…”
Dick didn’t realize he was crying until Jason’s thumb wiped a tear away.
“Okay.” Jason took a deep breath. “Okay, so I’m going to need you to repeat part of that.”
“Bruce? Or that I’m sorry? Or—”
“Alfred. Alfred put the suit on display?”
Dick blinked, scattering more tears he ignored. “Yes? Did you— you didn’t know that? Did you think it was— No. Bruce couldn’t even handle seeing a photo of you! I thought Alfred putting that case in the Cave was going to kill Bruce. Drive him to finally let himself be killed like Tim said he was trying to do.”
“Right, fuck that. I’m going down and—” Jason started to stand and then took a knee again quickly and clasped Dick’s face on both sides. “No. No, first, if you ever and I mean fucking ever get to the point of hallucinating like that again you come to me or call me or anything. Do you hear me, big bird? If it gets bad or you think it will you come to me. I’m your little brother. You come to me.”
For a moment, Dick let himself close his eyes. He let himself close his eyes and breathe and take comfort in his little brother being there. “Promise.”
“Okay. Now, I’m going to go smash a case.”
Dick reached out and caught Jason’s hand. “Wait, you owe me an answer.”
“Dick.”
“You said you would! And I promise after we’ll go smash that fucking case together, okay? I’ve always hated it. But a deal is a deal.”
Jason basically deflated as he sat down on the floor at Dick’s feet. He rubbed a hand across his face. Dick felt bad, but he had bared his own soul and payment was due.
“Jay, have you ever slept in your room? Since you’ve been back, I mean. Since you’ve been back, have you ever actually slept a night in your room here?”
There was a long moment of silence where deal or no, Dick didn’t know if Jason was going to answer. Then—
“I can’t, Dick. It’s just— have you seen it? Nothing’s changed! It belongs to a dead kid and I just can’t. I can’t be him anymore.”
“Okay. Tomorrow I’ll clean it out for you.”
Jason’s head snapped to look up at Dick.
Dick shrugged. “This is your home too. Tomorrow I’ll clean it out. I can put it in a bunch of boxes and label it all or—”
“Toss it,” Jason spat and then quickly amended in a softer voice, “Not the books, leave those. And I guess… pack up and notebooks you find and stash them somewhere. You can… if there’s clothing Danny or Damian might like, give it to them. But the rest… toss the rest.”
“Okay, I can do that. And when I take Danny out in a few days you can come too and we’ll out some new things for your room too.”
“Dick,” Jason started, a clear protest. And then he sighed like all the air was let out of him. “Okay. But just like sheets and stuff.”
“Sure,” Dick agreed easily and with a too innocent smile. Before Jason could question it, Dick escaped sideways from the chair. “Now come on, we have a case to smash.”
Jason scrambled up from the floor. “We’re burning the suit after.”
“Of course we are. We’ll torch it on your grave.”
--- AN: Well this was a very dramatic section! Who knew that adding Danny to the family would help the rest of them deal with things! And yep, it's canon that the case with Jason's suit and that damn plaque are Alfred's doing, not Bruce's.
Stay delightful, darlings!
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caplanbuckybarnes · 3 days
Text
Everything You Deserve (logan)
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Summary: Logan deserves all of your love
WC: 815
Warnings: fluff, logans uncertain.
Read on Ao3!
--
The sun was beginning to set, casting a golden hue across the horizon as you stood on the porch of the cabin Logan had brought you to. It was secluded, surrounded by nothing but towering trees and the sounds of nature. A haven, far from the chaos that normally followed him.
You smiled softly, wrapping your arms around yourself as the cool evening air started to settle in. Logan had been inside for a while, claiming he had something to do. You had no idea what he was up to, but knowing him, it could’ve been anything from fixing something in the house to just…needing a moment alone.
You didn’t mind. It was rare for him to be so at peace. Normally, he was on edge, fighting some battle—whether it was with others or himself. But here, there was none of that. Just quiet moments with the man you loved.
The sound of the screen door creaking open broke your thoughts. You turned to see Logan step out, hands tucked in the pockets of his jeans, his flannel shirt rolled up to his elbows. His hair was tousled, and that familiar rugged look on his face was softened by the evening glow.
"Hey," he said in that gruff, low voice of his, though there was a hint of something else there—an unspoken emotion he rarely showed.
“Hey yourself,” you replied, giving him a warm smile. “What’ve you been up to?”
Logan walked over to stand beside you, eyes scanning the landscape for a moment before turning back to you. “Just thinkin’,” he said, his brow furrowing slightly.
“Uh-oh, that’s dangerous,” you teased lightly, earning a huff of amusement from him. You nudged his arm playfully, leaning your head against his shoulder. “What’s on your mind?”
Logan was silent for a long moment, and you could feel the tension in him. It wasn’t the usual kind, though. This was different.
Finally, he sighed, turning to face you fully. His hands came out of his pockets, reaching to take yours. His grip was firm but gentle—another rare thing with him.
“You,” he said simply, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “I’ve been thinkin’ about you.”
Your heart fluttered at his words. Logan wasn’t one for grand declarations, but when he said things like that, they always hit deep. “What about me?” you asked softly.
Logan’s gaze dropped to your intertwined hands, a slight frown tugging at his lips, but not in anger or frustration. More like he was struggling to find the right words.
“I don’t deserve this,” he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper. “Don’t deserve you.”
You opened your mouth to protest, but he continued before you could.
“I’ve done a lot of things…things I’m not proud of. Hurt a lot of people. Been fightin’ my whole damn life, and I’m just…I’m tired. But you—" he paused, his eyes meeting yours, full of raw vulnerability. "You’re too good for me. Deserve better than some broken-down, fightin’ machine.”
Your heart ached at the way he saw himself, always so hard on who he was, who he had been. You cupped his face gently, your thumb brushing over the rough stubble of his jaw.
“Logan,” you whispered, making sure he was looking at you, “you deserve everything in the world. You deserve peace, love…me.” You gave him a soft smile, hoping he could feel the sincerity in your words. “You’ve been through so much, and you’re still standing. You still care. That’s why you deserve it.”
He stared at you for a long moment, the battle waging in his mind visible in his eyes. But slowly, you saw the walls begin to crumble. His shoulders relaxed, and he leaned into your touch.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” he muttered, shaking his head slightly, but there was a small, almost shy smile playing at his lips.
You smiled back, pulling him down for a gentle kiss. It wasn’t rushed or heated—just a quiet moment between the two of you, where everything else faded away. When you pulled back, you rested your forehead against his, the two of you standing in the soft glow of the setting sun.
“You deserve me because you love me,” you whispered against his lips. “And I love you. That’s all there is to it.”
Logan’s arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer, and you could feel the steady thrum of his heartbeat against your chest.
“For what it’s worth,” he said, his voice a low rumble, “I love you too, darlin’. More than I ever thought I could.”
You smiled, your heart swelling with warmth. In that moment, surrounded by the peace of the woods and the comfort of his embrace, everything felt right.
Because he did deserve it. And you were more than happy to give him everything.
--
EVERYTHING PERM: @nekoannie-chan @kjs-s @notyourtypicalrose @mistressofallthingsgeeky
MARVEL PERM: @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @late-to-the-party-81 @capsthot @kenzieam @dis-plus-fanfic-reblog-writes
LOGAN/WOLVERINE:  @winterslove1917
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Note
Hey i really loved ur imagine of Jude x drunk gf and i was wondering if you would do a part 2 of Jude taking care of the reader when she’s hungover the morning after 🎐🤍
a/n: Your wish is my command! This is my first request, thank you so much! I hope you like it.
PART 1: LATE NIGHT, SOFT HANDS
EARLY MORNING, SWEET KISSES
• jude bellingham x gf!reader
• warnings: (English is not my first language!)
• summary: Jude Bellingham cares for his hungover girlfriend the next morning, while they share playful banter about her drunken antics, including her insistence that he’s “no fun.” Grateful for his help, she promises not to drink like that again. Obviously he doesn’t believe her.
The first light of dawn crept through the blinds of Jude’s bedroom, casting a faint, golden hue over the soft bedding. He was wide awake, his back resting against the headboard as he quietly scrolled through his phone, glancing occasionally at the girl beside him. His girlfriend, half-buried under the duvet, lay curled up like a cat, one arm lazily draped over his waist.
Jude sighed softly, running a hand through her tousled hair, a mix of amusement and adoration on his face. Last night had been a whirlwind—well, for her, mostly. Now, as the sun slowly rose, he glanced at the cup of warm tea and the aspirin on the nightstand. He knew she’d need it when she woke up. She always did after nights like this.
A soft groan escaped from under the covers. Jude looked down, watching as she shifted slightly, squinting against the sunlight. Her hand reached out blindly, patting his leg beside her before her eyes finally fluttered open.
"Morning," he said quietly, his voice gentle.
She stirred slightly, groaning softly as her hands moved up to rub her eyes. Jude couldn't help but chuckle at the sight. She was always cute in the mornings, but hungover mornings were a whole different story.
His girlfriend winced and groaned again. "Too loud..." she whispered, her voice hoarse, cracking with the fatigue of the night before.
"That bad, huh?" Jude teased, his tone light. He pulled the blanket up a little higher over her, his fingers brushing against her bare legs beneath his hoodie. It looked good on her, hanging off her shoulders like it did, she was practically drowning in his clothes, but there was something endearing about it. She just snuggled deeper into it, grateful for the comfort.
Her brow furrowed as if the light was too much to handle. "Why do I feel like death?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Jude chuckled—a little too loudly, much to her dismay—and gestured toward the nightstand where the cup of tea sat. “Tea. No better cure for a hangover, or so my mum says.”
She took the cup gratefully, wrapping both hands around it as if it were her lifeline. "Thank you. You're the best."
“I’m the what?” He teased.
“Juuude…,” she groaned and took another sip.
For a second, she didn't move, just lay there, cocooned in warmth and regret of her yesterday’s decisions. But then, after a moment, she blinked, taking in her surroundings. The bed, the clothes she was wearing—his hoodie, his sweats—and her makeup-free face. It clicked in her mind, and she glanced up at Jude, a soft smile pulling at her lips.
"You did this, didn't you?" she asked, her voice still quiet, but there was gratitude there.
Jude's smile widened as he turned off his phone to look at her. “I did what I could. I honestly forgot how elusive you are when you're tipsy...” He paused, raising an eyebrow at her. “Figured you wouldn’t want to wake up in that tight dress with your makeup all smudged.”
She wanted to kiss him and throw herself into his arms, but her body was half asleep and half aching. “You're an angel,” she mumbled, slowly trying to sit up straighter. She winced at the movement, one hand coming up to cradle her pounding head. “I feel like I got hit by a truck.”
“Well, you did say you were ‘not plastered’ when you got home,” Jude teased again, gesturing for her to take another sip of the tea.
She shot him a half-hearted glare, but the corner of her lips twitched upward. "Shut up. I didn’t think I was that bad."
"You couldn’t even walk straight," he reminded her, raising an eyebrow.
She groaned again, burying her face in her hands. "God, I’m never drinking again."
Jude couldn’t help but laugh, sitting down beside her. "We’ll see about that."
She chuckled softly, trying not to choke, and playfully stuck out her tongue at him.
“I didn’t give you a lot of trouble, right?” Biting her bottom lip softly, she looked at him, hoping not to feel so embarrassed and that her loving—not at all teasing—boyfriend would lie to her a little. She asked it casually, almost like she was sure the answer would be 'no'. Nevertheless Jude had that mischievous glint in his eye, the one that told her she wasn’t getting off that easily.
He leaned closer, lowering his voice teasingly. "Trouble? You? Oh no, nothing too bad. Except for the part where you insisted you wanted to cook."
Her hand shot out from under the pillow, pushing him lightly as she groaned again. "I did not."
"Oh, you did," he continued, his grin widening as he leaned back putting both hands behind his head. "You were all over the place in the kitchen. And let’s not forget that you don’t even know how to cook sober."
She pulled the pillow down just enough to peek at him, her cheeks flushing as she recalled blurry flashes of her actions. “Okay, maybe I tried to cook. That doesn’t sound like trouble though."
"Oh, it was trouble," Jude teased. “I had to practically wrestle a pan out of your hand. You kept telling me you knew what you were doing.”
Her eyes widened in horror. "Oh God."
He nodded solemnly, barely suppressing a laugh. "Swear.”
She narrowed her eyes at him, though the smile tugging at her lips betrayed her. “You’re not funny.”
“Oh, I’m hilarious,” he said, leaning closer, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
She shook her head, fighting the smile that was growing. “I’m not even gonna entertain that.”
“Sure you will.” He crossed his arms. “And you told me that last night…”
She pressed her lips, feeling a pang of guilt despite the teasing. He didn’t seem to care, but still, the words lingered in her chest. “Fine. I’m never calling you not funny again, okay? Pinky promise.”
Jude’s grin softened, and he held out his pinky. “Deal,” he said, hooking his pinky with hers.
For a second, they stayed like that, just holding the promise between them. She tried not to laugh at how serious they both looked in that moment. It was ridiculous—making a pinky promise over something so silly—but it felt sweet in its own way.
Jude finally broke the silence, leaning down to kiss the top of her head gently. “You’re something else, you know that?” he whispered, his voice warm and affectionate.
She leaned into him, her eyes fluttering shut for a brief moment as he cupped her cheek, his thumb gently brushing across her skin. Her headache seemed to ease slightly at the comfort of his touch, the warmth of his presence.
The moment settled into a comfortable quiet, and she lay back down, her head resting against his leg now, looking up at him.
"Thanks, though. For taking care of me." Her voice was softer, sincere, as she closed her eyes briefly, still fighting the lingering effects of last night. "I don’t deserve you."
Jude’s smile softened, and he leaned down to press another kiss to the top of her head. "You don’t have to thank me. I’ll always take care of you, even when you try to burn down my kitchen."
She laughed, though it was a quiet, tired laugh, and when she opened her eyes again, he was still looking down at her with that same fond expression. His hand came up, his thumb grazing her cheek, tracing the curve of her face with such tenderness that it made her heart swell.
"How do you do that?" she murmured, her voice sleepy again but full of affection.
"Do what?"
"Make everything feel better, even when I feel like absolute garbage."
He shrugged lightly. "Just part of the job, I guess."
She smiled, reaching up to cover his hand with hers, squeezing it gently. "You’re good at it."
"And you’re worth it.”
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sturnsdarling · 1 day
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teenage dirtbags, introduction
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Skater!Matt needs help with his essay, and Overachiever!reader is the smartest girl on campus
vibe check: enemies(?) to lovers au, childhood acquaintances, no warnings this is just a blurb to set up the vibes.
1k words
A/N: This is just the intro to what I plan on being at least a five part series. I don't ship blair and dan but lowkey this is them (i've fallen down an edit rabbit hole and now i kinda ship them lol)
love and cigs, merc
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You and Matt had never really liked each other, you were completely different people, and despite going through every grade together, and somehow ending up at the same college, you definitely wouldn't classify yourself as friends, or even acquaintances. Honestly, you couldn't stand him, with his boyish charm, eye watering smile and breezy attitude, he was insufferable.
Matt was interesting, to say the least. You never saw him without his head phones in and feet planted firmly on his skateboard. His wardrobe seemed to consist solely of dirty band tees, cargos that didn't fit him and beat up sneakers. He was the furthest thing from a scholar, his idea of an extra curricular activity being how many screws he could loosen in the Deans office before the man had a brain haemorrhage over his chair or desk falling apart every other day. Every grade he got was just above average, 'consistently uninspiring', as he called it, and despite the fact that he was actually quite smart, he never wanted to be anything other than exactly that, average.
You on the other hand, we're almost the exact opposite. Your grades were the highest in the entire college, the best they'd seen in years, actually. You ran multiple clubs, were the president of not one, but two societies; philosophy and classic literature; and tutored everyone from under to postgrads. You were clean cut and classic, pleated skirts with knee high socks and a collared shirt, tucked under a vintage sweater was your personal uniform; you looked as smart as you were. You were every schools dream, painfully smart and ridiculously driven, everyones favourite over achiever. From the bows in your hair, to the Plato or Dostoyevski tucked in your arms, all the way down to your vintage platform loafers, you were extraordinary.
The day it all started,
Your books were tucked neatly in size order against your chest, hair tucked behind your ears and knee socks tight against the bottom of your thighs as you headed to your second lecture of the day. The halls of the literature building were as busy as you'd expect it to be on a Wednesday, filled with people all going about their days and trying to sound as smart as possible in front of their new pretentious friends.
The sound of skateboard wheels against the brown linoleum echoed behind you, followed by the huffs and puffs of said pretentious people.
Matt rode through the halls, swerving through the students with ease as he tried to catch up with you, eyes trained on the way your hips moved in your pleated skirt. He called your name, and the sound of his voice made your eyes roll to the back of your head, so you kept walking.
Matt picked up his speed, pushing off with his leg to reach you. he called your name again, this time as he pulled up next to you, kicking his board up and holding it in his hand, jogging slightly to walk shoulder to shoulder with you.
"you walk way too fast" Matt said, only slightly breathless.
"people tend to do that when they have somewhere to be" you said, attitude thick in your voice as you kept your eyes trained on your destination.
Matt was looking at you, grinning at your consistency in hating him.
"where ya headed?" He said, stepping in front of you with a light jog, walking backwards and finally gaining your eye contact.
You huffed, a faux smile forming on your face in response to his cheesy grin.
"what do you want, Matt" you said, continuing your pace and slightly impressed at Matts ability to walk backwards without bumping into anyone.
"how do you know I want something?" Matt shrugged, squinting his eyes at you in bashful accusation.
"because we haven't had a conversation in... three years? and you look like you want something" You stopped walking, tilting your head to the side, "so what is it?" you looked him up and down quickly.
Matt pressed his tongue to his teeth with a smile, stopping in front of you, "I need your head"
Your face screwed up instantly, "I beg your pardon?" you scoffed.
Matt chuckled, shaking his head and rubbing the back of his neck with his palm, "not like that, I mean, I need your brain"
You cocked your eyes to the side, waiting for him to say words that actually made sense, "I'm gonna need a bit more clarity than that, Matt"
"I need your help with an essay" Matt said, biting his plump lip slightly with pleading eyes.
"no" you shook your head with a scoff, stepping out from his figure blocking your path and continuing your stride down the hall.
"come on, y/l/n, please?" He jogged after you, "I'm desperate", gently pressing his shoulder against yours.
"why would I ever help you?" you scoffed, looking straight ahead and ignoring the sentiment of him still calling you by your last name after all these years.
"cause I'm desperate" Matt was looking at your profile, repeating his earlier claim, "and we're friends"
you scoffed again, "we are not friends, Matt" you said, rolling your eyes.
Matt searched his brain for an example of your friendship but came up blank, "okay, fine, we're not friends" he grinned, "but we've known each other forever and.... it's nice to help people" it was the only thing he could think of.
You ignored him, shaking your head with an uncontrollable smile attempting to form on your face at his persistence. Matt continued to walk with you, begging, pleading and saying your last name over and over again like an irritating child, telling you that you're the smartest person he knows, and that he'll fail without your help.
"whats the essay on" you rolled your eyes, giving in and looking to him.
"existentialism" Matt said, his ears perking up at your interest.
You huffed, stopping once more. People continued to rush past you and Matt as you stood face to face in the centre of the hall.
"if I help you, you'll leave me alone?" You questioned.
"absolutely" Matt nodded
you rolled your tongue over your teeth, deadpanning at Matt.
"fine" you said, bluntly.
"yes!" Matt cheesed, "you are an angel sent from heaven, thank you"
"come to my dorm tonight, seven o'clock and we'll get started" blatantly ignoring his compliment.
"I'll be there" Matt said, placing his board on the floor.
"it's the franklin building, room three, if you cant find it then i'l-" The sound of Matts wheels rolling away cut you off.
"i'll just follow the smell of vanilla and academic overachievement, I'll find you" Matt said from over his shoulder, skating away from you down the hall.
You rolled your eyes as you watched him weave in and out of students, dropping out of sight as he rode his board down the flight of stairs to the exit.
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taglist: @sturniozalt@mattslolita@shaquilles-0atmeal@blahbel668@sleepysturniolo@le4hsblog @sarosfilms @joemamaaa42069 @2muchofaslvt @seluky10 @cherib3lla @jetaimevous @witchofthehour
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koriangguk · 2 days
Text
✧ vegas temptation
✧ synopsis: Falling victim to yet another failed situationship, you're consumed by dread. Maybe love is something you aren't destined to experience in this lifetime? Or maybe you just need a little getaway and a friend who'll accompany the series of impulsive decisions this would entail. Thankfully, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, right?
✧ genre: fake dating au, heavy on smut with a sprinkle of angst
✧warnings: cream play, nipple play, hickeys, different positions, protected/unprotected sex, public nudity (?), tongue-fuck, fingering, denied orgasm, overstimulation, ice play, vibrator play, rope play, candle burns (?) ✧recommended artists: Chase Atlantic, The Weeknd, Daniel Di Angelo, Doja Cat
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Everyone knows heartbreak is a pain in the ass, but an intriguing one at that.
It pulls on your heartstrings and fuels the desperate longing to feel whole again. Releasing a tide of emotions that follow suit as your consciousness drowns under the shattering pieces of broken promises, white lies and everything in between. 
But, nothing compares to the ego that awakens within you as you enter a phase of recovery, embarking on the infamous villain arc. One that is flamed with rage and hunger for revenge. 
Because, let's be honest, a good heart can only take you so far until everything comes crashing down again. Before you are back at square one, like clockwork, slaving after hours just to receive the bare minimum. 
So, fuck that and fuck Kim Jaewon. Stupid cunt. 
Honestly, if it wasn’t for Jungkook and his Black Amex you wouldn’t even bother brushing your hair, let alone worry about which lacey lingerie you should pack for a week in Vegas. 
The Entertainment Capital of the World. 
Well, it certainly would be entertaining to put two best friends into a couple’s suite and hope that nothing happens. But, as Jungkook’s dilated pupils watched you swallow your feelings with another shot of tequila it didn’t really seem like he was the one betting on that deal. Quite the opposite actually. 
“Honestly, screw him, y/n.” he muttered, running his fingers through those dark locks as the two of you waited for your flight at the boujee business lounge. 
In contrast to his trust fund upbringing, you felt like the biggest elephant in the room venturing into the wrong tax bracket. So, the potential side effects of the alcohol running down your esophagus were primarily to calm the nerves of sticking out like a sore thumb, and only slightly to forget your ex. 
“Have you been listening at all? I kind of already did.” your lips pursed in annoyance, words barely stringing together. 
You weren't annoyed at Jungkook, per se, more so at yourself for letting it get this far. For intoxicating your system at the crack of dawn, as at least twenty pairs of eyes watched the two of you bicker. But, come on, surely it was 5 pm somewhere. Listen, when everything is already going wrong, how damaging could another bad decision be? Especially, in the form of a liquid. So, please, everyone keep your judgement to yourself. 
“Well, then that might just be the problem.” 
“Huh?” your gaze furrowed, brows knitted with confusion. 
“You’re fucking the wrong guys, y/n.” Jungkook whispered with a sly grin. 
“Right. And you, I’m assuming would have been my Mr. Right, of course.” you scoffed, jabbing your finger into his chest before looking back up at his heavy gaze. 
“Give me a week and we'll see.” he teased, using his foot to pull on your chair, bringing your tipsy form closer until inches were separating your parted lips from his. 
Playful would have been the best word to describe your relationship with Jungkook. You never crossed the line between friends and lovers but were in very close proximity to doing so. So, when you poured your heart out, crying on his shoulder the night Jaewon’s cheating scandal broke out like wildfire, a part of Jungkook was pleased by the news despite how selfish it might have looked. 
Simply put, he was never a fan of your boyfriends. How could he be when the mere sight of another man beside you triggered every cell in his body, charging a visceral reaction that was forced to be suppressed, kept on the low because you were never his to be territorial of. 
Never his to be taken care of. To be loved. Oh, if only you knew how badly he wanted it. How badly he wanted you. 
Only, you did know. Because, like a sickening aftertaste, the tension between the two of you always lingered. But he kept his distance, and you played on with the denial. Praying for each other’s downfall, you hoped that the other would finally cave in, and say the three words that would change the trajectory of your relationship forever. 
But, as time went on, his fetish for your love only grew stronger and an innocent crush matured into a craving. One that could no longer be suppressed no matter how much you tried to push it away. To push him away. 
Jaewon was your last straw. The breaking point that made you question whether you were destined to be loved in this lifetime. And although he caused you pain, you didn’t know if you should thank your ex or curse his whole bloodline, because now that he was gone there was no point in denying that Jungkook and you were more than just friends. 
Lathering the shea butter on your damp skin, your vision was hazy, body seemingly recovering from the hot shower. But, after that 15-hour flight surrounded by multiple throw-ups and diaper changes, a scrub-down was a must. So, there you were standing in front of the full-sized mirror in the pink pyjama set your mom gifted you specifically for this trip. Whatever that meant.  
See, Jungkook had a way with words. It was his charm. His sensual demeanour could have an innocent bystander wrapped around his finger with one plea. A practical skill that most likely fueled your mother’s spending on the silk fabric, but one that you have yet to fall victim to. 
His mind games were strong, but your stubbornness was stronger. He didn’t mind, actually, kind of adored it. The dominant side of you, the way you could shut him up with one glare. It made loving you so much more thrilling, worth fighting for every sigh, every eye roll, every sneer. 
“Stop looking at me like that.” you blurted at the man's reflection as his palms rested on the top of the doorframe, darkened orbs bluntly eying your body from top to bottom. 
“Like what?” Jungkook grinned, nibbling on his lip rings.
“Like you want something.” you whispered with a furrowed gaze, spraying some leave-in conditioner into your detangled hair. 
“Hmm … but, I do want something.” he teased, inching closer before you felt his bare chest hit your back, veiny hands holding onto your waist. 
“I bet. I made rules you know? In case you thought I’d give in so easily.” you murmured, turning to face him as your fingers slightly tugged on the towel wrapped around his hips. 
“Is that so?” he chuckled softly, eyes flickering down to your plump lips. 
“Mhhm,” you nodded, feeling his hands slowly travel up your top as your own intertwined behind his neck. 
“Did I break any already?” he rasped into your ear, teeth grazing against the soft skin. 
Your mouth curled into a mischievous sneer as you whispered, “Just one.” 
However, before he could respond, your fist was already gripping the chains on his neck, gently pulling him toward the king-sized bed that was covered in rose petals and a complimentary note from the hotel. 
Happy honeymoon, lovebirds!
Loosening his towel, Jungkook watched as you straddled his lap, pressing your hands onto his chest before innocently glancing up at his parted lips. You could have sworn a drool dripped down his mouth, but it might’ve just been your ego flying through the roof as you felt his racing heartbeat.   
“May I?” you teased, slowly rocking your hips against the friction beneath you. 
“By all means, love.” he purred, tracing his hands back onto your thighs before flinching at your sudden slap. 
“Hands off, Jeon. Rule number one.” you giggled at the sudden change in his demeanour. The way his furrowed gaze searched for the audacity that could’ve potentially justified the words that came out of your mouth. 
“You’re fucking with me, right?” he groaned, jerking his head back. 
“No?” a small pout worked its way over your innocent face, eyes fluttering. 
“Baby, please.” 
Was he begging? Or were your knees buckling from the fatigue? Whatever. Keep focus, y/n. 
“I warned you, Koo.” you winked, brushing your lips over his before a knock on the door interrupted the little moment. 
“Room service!” a man’s voice echoed from the corridor. 
I guess the sight of Jungkook’s sculpted chest completely hazed your mind as you struggled to recover even the slightest recollection of ordering food. 
“Coming!” you yelled out, planting a kiss on the tip of his nose until his hold on your waist tightened. 
“No, stay.” he murmured, voice laced with desperation. 
“I have to open the door, Jeon, that's kind of how it works.” 
“I like you here.” he grinned, tugging on your bottom lip before leaving a soft spank on your ass. And, as you glanced back at his heaving chest you feared that rule number one was going to be short-lived. 
“Do you like it? They didn’t have Carbonara but I thought shrimp fettuccine would have sufficed,” you said with slight hesitation which shortly dissipated as you watched him empty the dish clean.  
“Trust me, y/n. You being here has already made me a happy man. Everything else is just a cherry on top.” Jungkook smiled, rubbing his tattooed hand along his jaw before reaching for the last plate cover.
“Honestly, I wanted to thank y-,” your words were interrupted by his sudden whine. 
“No dessert?” his brow arched slightly. 
“Oh. Shoot, sorry. I … I didn’t think you’d want any.” your words came out as a stutter, eyes frantically searching for the phone. 
“Mhmm, but I would kill for some cheesecake.” he sighed with a pout, loosening the buttons on his shirt. 
Changing out of the cotton fabric that covered his cucumber-scented body roughly five minutes ago, Jungkook decided to parade the same pyjama set as you. And, now that the two of you were matching, it was clear what your mom’s mission was all along. 
“Yeah, okay, let me just call them b-” 
“No need.” 
“Huh? So, you don’t want dessert?” 
“I do.” he teased, keeping his voice low and calm. 
“Okay, let’s cut back on the riddles, Jeon. Do I call or not?”
But, there was no answer. Instead, he simply excused himself from the table before walking towards the red couch, patting the seat next to him. 
“Come here, y/n.” his voice lowered to a rumble, darkened orbs filled with nothing but lust. 
“Why?”
“If I can’t touch you let me at least taste you.” 
Your heart skipped a beat. Hands fidgeting with the rings on your fingers. 
“I beg your finest pardon?” you scoffed from pure disbelief, folding your arms over your chest. 
“Baby, you have at max three seconds to walk your fine self over here before I grab you myself.” 
“Was that a threat?” you glared at his sly expression, hooded gaze colliding with yours. 
“One …” his tone demanded a response. 
But, you didn’t move. Not even an inch. Aggravating the tension. 
“Two …” 
Who does he think he is? Grab you myself. Claw machine sounding ass. 
“Three …” 
You chuckled, giving him the nastiest eye roll before your muscles tensed up, seeing his 5’8 gym rat physique actually get up. 
“Okay! Alright! I’m coming.” you blurted in sheer panic, fixing your bottoms before doing the walk of shame toward his pleased self. 
Reaching out his hand, you pushed it away, reminding him of the deal. 
“Right here, love.” Jungkook grinned, marking his chest as a target for your landing. 
What a tease. 
“You know what, Koo. Fine. If you want to play games, let’s play a game.” you hissed with a wink, stripping out of the silk fabric before dropping it on his lap.  
“Fucking hell.” a growl escaped his parted lips as his eyes raked over your glistening skin, admiring every inch, every crevice of your body. 
He was needy, but you were too busy rummaging through the mini-fridge to notice how desperately he longed for your attention. 
“Perfect!” you exclaimed, shaking a bottle of whipped cream before straddling his lap once again. Except this time, in your black lingerie. One that was initially reserved for Jaewon’s eyes only until he decided to fuck you over. Now, the privilege was all Jungkook’s. 
“Y/n.” he breathed out heavily, creased forehead resting on yours. 
And, as you pressed your thumb against his chin, your index finger slid along his bottom lip, feeling his tongue lick the cream off your skin. 
“Just like that, baby.” you gave him a tiny nod of reassurance, glancing up at his doe-eyed gaze. 
Fuck, submissiveness never looked this good. 
“Y/n, please.” he whimpered, hands hovering over your skin before you finally gave in, intertwining your fingers with his. 
Unclasping your bra, you let his veiny hands rest on your perky breasts, decorating your hardened nipples with his special treat. 
“Taste me,” you purred, tugging on his bottom lip as his mouth opened in a half-moan. 
He was wasted. Big time. 
“You sure?” he had to double-check, searching your lustful gaze for approval. 
“I am. Enjoy your dessert, Jeon.” the words simply rolled off your tongue, like you’ve been meaning to say them all along. And, as you ran your fingers through his messy hair, slightly tugging on the ends, the built-up need within you slowly inched up, begging for his touch. 
Cupping your breasts in his burning palms, he peppered your skin with sloppy kisses, teeth grazing against the pinks of your sensitive nipples before biting down on the flesh. 
“Fuck” you hissed with your head jerked back. 
Sucking off the creamy delight that painted your swollen tits, his pierced tongue licked its way up to your parted mouth, marking your neck with purple hues of possession. 
“Koo,” you rasped against his ear, shamelessly rocking your hips back and forth as you felt the knot in your stomach tighten. 
“I know, baby.” he muttered, gently lifting your frail body before pinning it against the armrest of the red couch. 
Giving a little shake to the whipping cream that dropped from your hands, Jungkook levelled his face to yours, drawing a line down your stomach. And, as he watched you arch your back from the cold sensation, a spark of temptation danced in his darkened eyes, cheeks flushed from the sinful whimpers that escaped your parted lips until the warmth of his tongue eased the pain. 
Moving down the center line, his fingertips traced your ribs, a faint outline of which poked with each breath you took. In and out, your diaphragm was working overtime, trying to keep up with the suffocating demand. One that only fueled Jungkook’s cravings, as he tugged onto the black lace of your lingerie. 
“Compliments to the chef,” he whispered teasingly, gaze softening at the arousal that had your panties all drenched. 
“Jeon, stop staring, this is so embarrassing.” you whined, voice muffled by the pillow that covered your rosy cheeks as you desperately attempted to close your legs and simply vanish. 
“It’s not my fault someone forgot to order dessert.” he grinned, pulling you closer as his hold on your thighs tightened, before hooking your ankles over his bare shoulders. “Now, please. Let a man eat.”
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Admiring your sleeping features, Jungkook cuddled into your chest, planting soft kisses on your marked neck before dozing off inside your arms until the buzzing of your phone startled him right out of REM. 
No Caller ID
“Y/n?” a man’s hesitant voice echoed in his ear. 
“She’s sleeping.” Jungkook muttered, gently stroking your knuckles with his thumb. 
“Who is this? Jungkook, is that you?” Jaewon exclaimed, evidently more on edge than before. 
“What do you want?” 
“Can I talk to, y/n?” 
“As I just said, she’s sleeping.” Jungkook’s tone was low, aggravated by the need to repeat himself.
“Well, can you wake her up?” 
“She seemed quite worn out after the fifth round, so I probably shouldn’t.” a grin curled his lips as you rested your head on his heaving chest, completely naive to the unfolded event. 
“What?” 
“Lose the number, Jaewon.” Jungkook gritted through his teeth, ending the call before tossing your phone on the edge of the bed. 
Feeling the warmth of the sun rays peeking through the silk curtains, you stretched your sore body, patting the mattress next to you before noticing Jungkook’s absence. 
“Mmhm?” you pouted, reaching for your phone to check the time. 
There’s no way you slept through breakfast and he didn’t wake you. Based on your history of ‘hangryness’ and emotional breakdowns that followed suit he should know better. 
7:45 am 
“Jungkook?” you called out, covering yourself with the sheer nightgown before knocking on the bathroom door, waiting for a response. 
Nothing. 
“Jeon?” you called again, this time scanning the living room. Everything looked frozen in time, left untouched from the night before — the empty bottle of wine and the stained glass marked with your red lipstick. But still, no trace of Jungkook.
Going back into the bedroom, you quickly brushed your teeth and changed into a baby blue sundress, opening up the blinds to let in the natural light.
“Shit!” you yelped, widened eyes staring at Jungkook’s sculpted back. 
Sliding the door just enough to pass by, you felt the goosebumps spread across your body as the morning breeze danced around your bare skin. 
“Oh, I thought you quit.” you gasped, brows knitted with confusion as you looked over his broad shoulders, the smell of cigarettes lingering between you two. 
“Yeah, well, I thought you cut ties with Jaewon. So … I guess we’re both disappointed.” Jungkook exhaled sharply, turning his head halfway to take in another puff. 
Something was off, he seemed distant, cold to the touch. 
“What? What are you talking about?” you asked, hands fidgeting with the straps of your dress. 
“He called last night.” 
“Why? Is he okay?” 
And, that’s when he erupted. Back pressed against the railing, his body turned to face your timid form, before muttering, “Do you care?”
“Well, no? But … if we stopped talking and you suddenly called I would want to know why,” you hesitated with the explanation, analyzing the way his forehead creased with each word.  
“Mmhm, except I never treated you like a scrumbag, did I?” Jungkook swallowed, rubbing his tattooed hand along his flexed jaw. 
“True, but you never pursued me either.” you snapped back, arms crossed over your burning chest. 
“This is a prank, isn’t it?” he scoffed maniacally, eyes twitching from disbelief. 
“I’m dead serious, Jeon. Why did you keep your distance if you wanted me so badly?”
He didn’t answer. Letting the two of you stare at each other for a split second, before finally taking a step forward, following your pace as your back hit the glass door. Leaning his hands on either side of your head, his broad shoulders hovered over you.
If this was his attempt at scaring you or somehow making you feel beneath him, it was not working. Because, as his face levelled with yours, your gaze furrowed, never breaking eye contact. Standing firm on what you said. 
“Y/n, I kept my distance because I wanted you so bad.” 
“Kind of dumb, don’t you think?” you pouted with a slight head tilt. 
By now, Jungkook was ready to combust. The adrenaline running through his veins prepared to set off his fight or flight response at any given moment. 
“Okay. Fine. How about I pursue myself into your ass, hmm?” he growled, tone demanding a response. 
“I'd looove to see you try.” you teased, eyes fluttering with innocence. 
“On the bed.” 
“Excuse me?” you scoffed, tongue poking the side of your cheek. 
“You heard me. Chop chop, baby girl.” Jungkook rasped against your ear, nibbling on the soft skin as a final warning. 
To be honest you really didn’t know what you were getting yourself into until his fingers ran down your spine, hands tightening their hold on your hips as his growing boner pressed against the arch of your ass. 
Fuck, he was serious. 
“From now on, I’ll be so close you’d have to scrub my scent off you,” he sneered, gently sliding his two digits over your folds, fingertips coated with your wetness as you remained on all fours. 
“Koo,” you whimpered, tugging on your bottom lip.
Parting your throbbing cunt, his pierced tongue licked your clit, thumb rubbing it in small circles before your moans grew louder. More desperate. More needy. Hazy mind unable to fathom the calmness you radiated just a few minutes ago. 
“Hold on.” he whispered, reaching for his wallet to grab a strip of condoms before ripping one open with his gritted teeth. 
“Tell me if this is dumb enough for you.” Jungkook teased, mouth sliding along your tensed jaw as he rubbed his erection against your clit, resisting the urge to fill you up right then and there. 
It was clear that your words irked him but he had to remain calm enough to not hurt you, forcing his annoyance to cool off with a verbal mock. 
And, as he slowly pushed himself in, whimpers escaped your parted lips, hands gathering up the white sheets into knots, feeling his cock stretch its way in against the warmth of your walls. Cautious of his pace, he needed you to adjust, pulling in and out until there was enough lubrication for the growing friction to feel good, painless.
“Koo,” you whined again, gasping for air as his lips left a trail of open-mouthed kisses down your back. 
“Just like that, baby. You’re doing so good.” Jungkook reassured, softening his hooded gaze upon hearing your sweet sounds. The ones that poisoned his thoughts and invaded his dreams all those countless nights. 
Clenching your clit on his throbbing length, his vision grew in and out of focus, hissing at the tingling sensation. 
“Fuuuck, y/n.” he moaned, fingers digging into your ass, before jerking his head back. 
Picking up his pace, Jungkook went faster and harder. Slamming himself into you, until his twitching tip touched the surface of your cervix, making your toes curl in ecstasy, as a trail of juices ran down your trembling thighs. 
“Jeon, I'm gonna faint.” you cried out, feeling your throat tighten, lungs stripped away from air.
“Just a little longer, baby.” he muttered, chest heaving up from exhaustion. 
He was close. Very close. So, as your walls clenched around him for the sixth time, he could have sworn his dick melted. Became part of your anatomy, no longer attached to his person. Surrendered with a white flag. 
“Y/n, look at me.” he urged breathlessly, snapping the rubber off his sensitive dick before giving it a few more pumps, squirting his cum onto your displayed tongue, completely exasperating in the process.  
“So,” you swallowed obediently, “now that you've pursued my ass you'll quit smoking, right?” your doe-eyed gaze glanced up at his darkened orbs that watched you lick the dripping cum off his tip as you sat on your knees. Aware of his response, you brushed your lips against his, inviting his tongue inside before his burning body collided with yours, smiling into the deep kiss. 
“Well, technically, I didn't go near your ass. Not many girls like that.” Jungkook teased, tucking a few curls behind your ear.  
“Many girls, huh? How many?” you murmured, tracing the tattoos on his arm as your bodies laid skin to skin, staring at the white ceiling. 
“About five.” he answered, a bit too quickly for your liking. 
“Five? You man whore.” you scoffed with disgust, quickly retracting your hand from his. 
“Sometimes six, depending on which video loads first.” his nose scrunched in a tiny giggle once he saw your mouth drop, expression left dumbfounded as the dots in your head began to connect. 
So, that's what kept him busy all this time. Porn? Phenomenal. 
“Next time, I'll just stay curious.” you sighed, half disappointed yet, also relieved. He might’ve just lied straight to your face but sometimes, it's better to simply pick your battles, choosing to live in blissful ignorance than the chaos of reality. Whatever his reality entails.
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flemingsfreckles · 3 days
Text
Ol’ College Try (18+)
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Synopsis: UCLA!Jessie x UCLA!reader You and Jessie finally have bedrooms no longer in a dorm room, meaning you finally have the chance to explore a new step in your physical relationship using a strap on.
Warnings: SMUT (18+), first time using a strap on smut, its a little awkward and clumsy, strap on (R Receiving), Oral sex (R receiving), little bit of frustration and embarrassment, language.
WC: 3.9k
A/N: Hi, I haven't posted smut in months, literally since July, I sort of fell out of the mood for writing it, I'm working on getting back into it but we'll see. I’ll also be honest, I finished writing this and couldn’t bear the idea of rereading it so I’m sure there’s errors, I apologize.
“You have to promise not to laugh when I turn around.” You rolled your eyes behind your girlfriend’s back at her sudden change from confident to less than, all due to some silicone and leather.
“I won’t babe, I promise, just come over here.”
“I feel like it looks weird.” You watch as Jessie swivels her head to peek at you over her shoulder. You had been watching the way her arms and back moved as she maneuvered.
“You can take it off if you’re not comfortable.” You reassure her from where you were laying on the bed, blanket pulled up around your chest, you were shirtless and had been okay until Jessie’s warmth had left as she moved off the bed, suddenly feeling chilly.
“No, I want to at least try, it’s just new and different. What’s that saying they have? ‘Give it the old college try?’”
You smile at your girlfriend “I think it’s technically ‘Ol’ not ‘old’ but yeah babe, it’s okay if you’re nervous, I am a bit.” You admit. You and Jessie have been dating since the third month of sophomore year at UCLA, now upperclassmen, you were able to move off campus and you each had your own apartments just a few minutes from each other. With the new living location came new bedrooms, bedrooms that weren’t shared with another student, bedrooms that didn’t have a lofted twin size bed, bedrooms that didn’t have paper thin walls.
You both had returned to school early for pre-season, her for soccer and you for cross country meaning when you weren’t at practice, your roommates weren’t home and the two of you had a lot of free time. No classes, assignments, projects, or other school responsibilities had started yet. Reveling in your reunion after spending the summer apart, you and Jessie had found yourselves making up for lost time, often in the sheets of each other's beds. Which led to you the other day texting Jessie, being too shy to ask in person, asking if she’d want to try using a strap on you. She had quickly agreed before telling you to send her what you wanted and she’d buy it.
You had been eager to try it, testing out new waters in your relationship. Jessie had giggled when you opened your front door for her this morning, she held a bag out to you with a silly grin. “I feel like everyone can tell what’s in the bag.” She said as you opened the top, peering in to look at the toy. You sweetly rolled your eyes at your girlfriend’s bashfulness, taking the bag from her hand.
It wasn’t long after she arrived that the two of you were in your bed, Jessie’s body weight holding you firmly to the mattress as she kissed you.
You kissed her back hard, enjoying the feeling of Jessie’s hands roaming your body while yours ran up and down her sides. The two of you made out, quickly losing your shirts, throwing back your head as Jessie’s lips came to rest on your neck.
“Don’t, I’ve got photos tomorrow.” You gently remind her as you start to feel her start to suck on the skin. A dejected noise falls from Jessie’s lips as she releases the suction, causing them to vibrate slightly against you. She moves on, kissing down your chest to give attention to your breasts. Your fingers tangle themselves in her hair, pulling gently, gaining a hum of appreciation from Jessie this time. The longer you make out the more impatient you get, starting to grind up into Jessie, trying to hint to her you were ready to move on.
Jessie finally climbs off of you and heads toward where you had placed the bag earlier on the chair in your room, beginning to mess around with the harness and toy, leading to now where she’s shyly peeking over her shoulder at you with the harness fastened around her waist and thighs.
When she finally turns around to face you, your eyes drop to her waist and your stomach clenches at the sight, your beautiful girlfriend and between her legs the bright blue toy. It somehow looked larger sitting against her body.
“Come ‘ere.” You wave her over, hoping to boost her confidence back up as you can see the way she avoids eye contact with you. She crawls onto the bed, waiting for a moment before moving over to you.. As she leans over the toy sticking out pokes you in the stomach. “Hey!” You quickly move your hand down to grab it, moving it away from jabbing into you.
“Oops sorry, I didn’t think about that, not used to having anything there.” She says, laughing slightly as she looks down to see your hand holding it. “Hand on let me just.” She says before pulling the toy to be flush against her stomach.
With the toy no longer separating you, she leans down, finally reconnecting your lips. She kisses you for a moment before letting her hand trail between your legs, her fingers moving the cloth of your panties to the side. You sigh as her fingers begin to work between your legs, collecting your arousal before coming to your clit to rub slow circles. She continues touching you, pulling small noises of appreciation and approval from you as her fingers work.
“Jessie, come on.” Whining into her ear and bucking your hips she finally gets the message and pulls her hand back.
“What, are you ready?” Jessie pulls away from your lips.
“Yeah, I guess.” You could feel a small pit of nerves growing in your stomach, you’d hadn’t done this before, you trusted Jessie, she wouldn’t intentionally hurt you or make you uncomfortable, but it was new to both of you. You make a quick movement to remove your underwear before tossing it to the side and putting your legs back on either side of Jessie.
Jessie sits back on her knees, hand falling to the base of the toy. Her other hand comes up to rest on your inner thigh, pushing it slightly outward, her eyes falling between your legs. A smile comes across her face and you have to look away for a second from her intense stare.
“Hand me that.” Jessie points to the bottle of lube sitting next to your head on the bedside table. You grab it, passing it to her and watching as she opens the bottle, pouring on the liquid. She brings her hand down to begin spreading it. “Oh, it’s kind of cold.” She looks at her hand for a moment, rubbing her fingers together before adding “and slimey.” The bottle gets returned to the side table and Jessie slides herself closer to you, the tip resting on your stomach.
“Just go slow.” You say, putting your hands around her shoulders and lacing your fingers together behind her head.
“I will.” She nods down at you before breaking eye contact to look down where her hips rested between your thighs. Jessie maneuvers and you feel the toy now sitting against your core. She moves it around again before looking up at you quickly then back down, adjusting her hips again causing the toy to move. You feel the tip of the toy bump against a place you definitely didn’t want it going. “Wait.” You push against Jessie’s chest and she looks up, nervously. “Um, higher up, that’s the wrong-”
“Oh my god.” Jessie immediately inches backwards from you. “I’m sorry.” You watch as she drops her head in embarrassment. “I know where it is with my fingers.” She mumbles to herself, her confidence slipping away more and more the longer she has the appendage on.
“Babe, it’s fine, here I’ll help.” You reach down to where the strap hung gently grasping just above where Jessie’s own hand was wrapped around the girth. You take the tip, letting it glide across your clit before beginning to move it downward slowly. “There.” You gently push the tip into yourself before removing your hand placing it onto Jessie’s shoulder. “Go ahead.” You say looking up at your girlfriend who still had a hint of fear in her eyes.
She gives you a small nod and you watch her body begin to move and you feel the pressure of her hips angling forward, the toy beginning to push inside. You can tell by her gaze that she's unsure of what she’s doing, watching you for approval. “Is this fine?”
“Yeah, I’m good, keep going babe.” You nod up at her. She gives you a quick smile before her concentration face returns, her eyebrows furrowed and her bottom lip being tightly bit between her teeth, her eyes wander to where the two of you are connected, still moving her hips towards you ever so slightly. You bite your lip, starting to feel a larger stretch as Jessie continues to push forward. It wasn’t painful, but there was a definite tightness as Jessie bottomed out.
It takes a moment but Jessie’s hips finally are flush to yours and you can feel the fabric of the harness against your legs. Lying there you try your best to relax your muscles, still feeling a little nervous and unfamiliar with what was happening. You're unsure of where to put your legs, did you leave them lying on the bed? Should you bend them, put them around her waist maybe?
“Does it hurt?”Jessie looks between where your hips touch and back up to your face.
“Not exactly, it's just bigger than your fingers.” Your eyes trail to her hands that lay on either side of your waist, Jessie had good fingers, long, thick, but nowhere near the girth of the toy.
“Just let me know when you’re ready.”
“Yeah, maybe try pulling back a bit.” Your fingers dig into her shoulders, anticipating discomfort when she pulls back, only finding it to be not uncomfortable, just weird.
“Right, okay.” You watch, her face still contorted in confusion and concentration. She slowly shifts her hips backward again, just a small amount and the drag of the toy inside of you has you sighing, a noise that causes Jessie to freeze. “Are you alright?”
“I’m good babe, keep going.” You encourage her, giving her shoulder a squeeze, before letting your nails gently rake along the skin of her back. She pushed back in the small amount she had pulled out before pushing back in again.
Jessie slowly pulls back again, this time she drops her head, watching the toy slide out of you. You can see her eyes widen in amazement as she watches.
“Like what you see?” Bringing your hand to her chin you gently pull her face up to watch as she blushes.
“Yeah, it’s good, it’s hot.” She says looking up at you. Jessie gets lost looking at you for a moment, her hips stalling for a bit before she picks up her motion again.
“You can try going faster, or maybe harder?” You’re not fully sure what’s going to feel good. Jessie nods, her curls bouncing in front of her face. Her face is trying to mask a level of uncertainty. “Don’t be so nervous babe, it’s just me.” You bring a hand up to her rosy cheeks, hoping the gentle touch of your fingers will reassure her again.
“I just don’t want to hurt you.” The sincerity in Jessie's voice is cute you think, she was really worried about hurting you more than anything. You also knew her concerns would likely prevent her from fully letting herself go, it would take some time and practice.
“You won’t, fuck me like you mean it.”
Her eyes widen at your vulgar ask before a small smirk comes across her face as she looks at you. She drops to her forearms, her chest meeting yours as she ruts harder into you. Her strokes become firm, a loud noise of her hips meeting yours fills the room for a second before you start hearing Jessie’s ragged breathing in your ear.
“Oh, fuck Jess.” Your words spur her on, she pushes herself up again, thrusting faster, using the full length of the toy.
You get lost in the sensation, letting small moans of pleasure fall from your mouth. Muffling your moans Jessie kisses you hard as she continues to speed up her movements. Her trusts are a bit uncoordinated, a hard one, followed by some quick ones, she’d then slow down, then some shallow, some deep. It wasn’t bad by any means, just unpredictable.
You feel Jessie pull slightly too far out, the tip falling toward the bed but notice she thrusts her hips forward. You bring a hand to her waist giving her a gentle push “Hang on, you slipped out.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be, it’s fine.”
“I’m not good at this.” You watch as she starts to frown, the little bit of confidence she had gained a moment ago dwindling.
“It’s the first time Jess, it’s okay.” Your fingers draw lazy circles across her back, feeling goosebumps arise on her skin.
“Does it even feel good?”
“I mean,” you hesitate, not knowing how to exactly answer. Before you can clarify why you hesitated, Jessie talks.
“I’m sorry.”
“No baby it’s not you. I think I’m nervous, and it’s just something new, and it feels good but not in the mind blowing orgasm way,” you pause looking up at Jessie, you didn’t want to take a hit to her ego. “It’s good though, just like you being inside of me, it’s nice.” You blush as the words come from your mouth, having to break your gaze with Jessie.
“Okay. Do you want me to keep going?”
“Yeah, for a bit maybe? But, can you add more lube please.”
Jessie gives you a smile and a nod, reaching onto the bedside table and adding the liquid onto the toy. When Jessie begins to move again she gently runs the head of the toy across your core, letting it bump against your clit, causing your breath to hitch. You feel the tip at your entrance again and you nod at Jessie when she looks up confirming she’s in the right spot.
There’s a different sensation when she pushes into you this time, you feel as though you’re filled again just how you should be, not even realizing how empty you felt before. You let out a sigh of relief.
“Good?” Jessie cocks an eyebrow at you, you can see the slight smirk across her face, pleased with the reaction you had from her movement.
“Mmmhm.” You hum up at her with a nod.
Jessie lowers her body onto yours, causing the strap to shift deeper inside of you, as the warmth from her chest comes to rest on yours. It feels close, intimate, her body covering yours, your legs wrapped around her back, her face tucked tightly into the nape of your neck. You can hear her heavy breathing as she picks up again thrusting into you. In this position her thrusts are slower but more even, less sporadic, she has more control.
As you go to wrap your arms around Jessie’s back, her hands find yours first. She takes both of her hands interlacing your fingers and bringing them up to rest by the sides of your head.
With each thrust into you Jessie gives your hands a gentle squeeze. It’s a simple gesture, holding hands with Jessie but in the context, it’s overwhelming. “I love you.” You hear her mumble against your skin before she places a kiss.
“I love you.”
After a couple thrusts, Jessie releases one of her hands from yours and brings it between your bodies, she fumbles around before her fingers find your clit and she begins rubbing circles in time with her thrusts. “Is this okay?”
You suck in a breath, the mixture of Jessie’s fingers and the feeling of being full is a new sensation, one your body is still trying to process. You focus on her fingers, fingers that knew your body well, they knew what you liked, what made you feel good and that's what they were doing, making you feel good. “That's good baby.”
Despite the added pleasure from Jessie’s fingertips, you can tell you won’t cum from this. Too in your head about the toy, the newness, the unfamiliar territory, it had you slightly on edge and not the edge you wanted to be on.
“Jess.” You say gently, you hoped telling her wasn’t going to make her feel inadequate.
“Yeah?” She picks her head up from your neck, you can see the small sheen of sweat on her forehead, her baby hairs stuck to it.
“This feels good, I promise, I just don’t think it’s going to, ya know, get me there.” You cringe as you say the words, worried about what her reaction might be.
“Oh.” Her expression is surprised for a moment before her face falls, appearing disappointed. “I’m sorry.”
“No, no, babe it’s not your fault.” Holding her head in your hands you caress her cheeks. You think about what to say. If you mention you don’t feel comfortable enough, she’d blame herself for that though, it had nothing to do with her but Jessie always put her performance, in school, on the field, or in bed, on herself, even if it wasn’t her fault. You had to choose your words carefully with her. “It’s not you I promise. It’s me, I’m just not, I think it’s just I’m not used to there being something inside, it’s good, just new and I’m not quite used to it enough.”
Jessie nods in your hands but doesn’t say anything. You pull her down bringing her ear to your mouth. “Baby, you always make me feel so good, this is no different, you can still make me cum without the strap, that’s even better when you think about it, you don’t need a toy, it’s all you Jess.” Releasing the hold on her, she sits back up, careful not to move the toy around too much while still inside of you. “You always make me feel good babe.” You groan out as Jessie moves to trail her tongue down the side of your neck.
“Should I pull out?” Jessie asks, looking down at her waist.
“Yeah go ahead.” You try and relax as she pulls her hips back, pulling until the toy falls out. You notice Jessie's attention being pulled down to where the toy was now. “Hey.” She looks back up at you with a small half smile. “It’s okay Jess.” You pull her by the chin, bringing her mouth to yours, the toy sticking into your stomach again as she tries to lean over to kiss you. She giggles as her hand again reaches to press the strap up against her abdomen.
The two of you kiss, her tongue gently running over yours, softly pulling on your bottom lip with her teeth, causing you to let out a deep moan. She kisses your cheek, down to your jaw and up to place a sloppy kiss just below your earlobe.
“Can I eat you out?” She whispers following it with a couple more kisses down your neck.
“Please baby.” Your voice comes out more needy and wanting than you expected. You can feel her smirk against your neck and she continues to kiss across your chest, teasing you ever so slightly, taking her time moving down your body.
“Come on Jess.” Your hands find their way to her shoulders and you gently push her down where she was already headed, between your legs. She gives in, letting you push her between your legs. As she goes to lay down, the toy catches on the bed, preventing her from being able to fully lay down.
“Fuck this.” Jessie says sitting up and scrambling off the bed to remove the harness. You laugh at your girlfriend’s frustration with the toy as she pulls and fiddles with the various straps, until the harness loosens and falls off her waist. “Not funny.” Jessie grumbles, placing the toy onto the nightstand.
She wastes no time climbing back between your legs, her hands picking up your thighs and bringing them over her shoulders. She brings her face to your core, her tongue beginning to lick long strokes, appreciating your taste and the feeling of having her mouth back on you. She hums into you. Giving you a few more long licks, Jessie begins to pay attention to your clit.
She gives it a few flicks, her tongue firm before a slow circle around the nerves, her eyes locked on yours intensely watching as you roll them back, enjoying the feeling of her. “You’re so good at that babe, fuck.” You watch as Jessie's eyes light up at the praise. She always liked being praised, being told she was pleasing you. You feel her increase her pressure, adding more suction with her lips, putting all of her focus onto your clit.
“God Jess.” Jessie moans into you in appreciation of your words. Your hand finds the top of her head, running your hand through her hair before gently scratching her scalp, knowing the action spurred her on. You feel yourself finding the edge that you had been looking for, feeling the tightness in your stomach growing, the tightening of your thighs, your muscles all tensing. Your hand holds Jessie's head tight to you, your other hand fists the bedsheet tightly as you peak. Your hips thrust against Jessie's tongue, you feel her hands try to hold your hips steady to let her keep pleasing you, a groan of her name falls from your lips followed by a whine, beginning to feel the sensitivity of your post orgasm. Your hips buck a few more times, trying to escape the now gentle stimulation that Jessie was giving you to work you through your orgasm.
The grip on your hips loosens and Jessie pulls her tongue away after giving you one final featherlight lick, looking all too proud of herself and cockly when she pulls up, resting her cheek on your inner thigh.
“What?” you say, knowing she was just proud of herself. She always was, Jessie would get so cocky watching you fall apart from her touch.
“Nothing, I just love you.”
“I love you, ya dork, come up here.” You motion for her to come kiss you and she does, resting her body weight onto you for a moment as you lips meet. You kiss for a bit before Jessie rolls off of you, lying beside you, draping an arm across your waist.
“Thank you for trying that with me.” You quickly glance at the strap that was still sitting, covered in lube and your slick, on the bedside table.
“I’ll try anything for you baby, I just want to make you feel good.” Jessie says as she leans up, planting a heavy kiss on your lips. “I think I just need more practice.”
“Well I’ll always be interested in practicing with you Jess.”
294 notes · View notes
hoernypie · 2 days
Text
₊˚. '♡ Suguru's teachings ♡'.˚₊
tags: virgin y/n, p+v, cheating, first time, unexpierienced y/n
wc: 4976
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The sun glared down without any mercy on the schoolyard, the only source of shade was a bench nestled under the big tree. On this bench, you sat, your eyes closed to avoid the harsh light and your mind racing with thoughts that you were lost in. "What do you think about so much?" 
Looking up, you saw Suguru standing in front of you, with a furrowed brow and a look of concern on his face. He walked with purpose, knowing exactly what you were feeling and what was going on after accidentally hearing how you talked with Shoko before classes started.
You hesitate for a moment, unsure of how to respond to Suguru's question. You two were very close friends after all, but this topic could be a little embarrassing for you. "It's just...I'm feeling annoyed," you admit, a hint of vulnerability in your voice. "Dating Yū... I thought it would be amazing." Suguru nods in understanding, taking a seat beside you, now even more curious about the whole dating situation. He gently pats your hair. "Y/n," he says gently. "Tell me more about it so I can help." You smile weakly before continuing, "I just don't know what's wrong with me. He's sweet, caring, and much more but we've been dating for a month now and we won't even kiss me. I've seen other couples do that. I know it's stupid but...".
 "Sometimes, the girl could take the initiative." 
You blush at Suguru's suggestion, feeling a mix of embarrassment and hope. "But what if I mess it up?" you ask nervously. "What if he doesn't like it?" Suguru chuckles and nudges you playfully with his elbow. "Just be yourself," he reassures you. "Yū loves you for who you are, right?" He pauses, looking at you with a knowing smile. "And besides, I can give you a little...practice," he says, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. Your eyes widen in surprise, but before you can object, he leans in and presses a soft, chaste kiss to your cheek. "See? It's not that hard. Now, when you feel the moment's right, just lean in and..." He pauses, his eyes searching yours for a brief moment before pulling away. The air between you feels charged, and you realize that maybe taking the initiative isn't as scary as you thought.
"But a kiss on the cheek is different", you pout while turning your gaze away from him.
Suguru's smile widens at your pout, and he leans back against the bench, stretching his arms out along the backrest. "Alright, if you're that nervous, we can practice," he says, his tone light and reassuring. "How about we go to my dorm room?"
Your heart skips a beat at the suggestion, and you can't help but feel a rush of excitement mixed with anxiety. "Practice?" you repeat, your voice barely above a whisper. "But it'll be cheating, right?"
He shrugs nonchalantly and he nudges you, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Don't worry, we'll be just practicing,  besides we are friends," despite the awkwardness of the situation, you can't help but slowly nod. "Okay," you murmur.
You both stand up from the bench and with a reassuring pat on your back, Suguru leads the way to his dorm room. The short walk feels like an eternity as your mind races with a whirlwind of emotions. When you reach the door, he unlocks it and invites you inside. The room is simple and clean, with a bed on the opposite side of the desk. He motions for you to sit on the bed. As you sit down, you notice your hands are trembling slightly, and your heart is pounding against your chest. Suguru sits beside you, giving you a comforting smile, twisting strands of your hair between his fingers. He leans in, his breath warm on your face, and whispers, "Just remember to breathe." His hand reaches for yours, giving it a gentle squeeze, and making the nervousness seem to dissipate. With his other hand, he gently cups your cheek and tilts your face towards his. Your eyes lock onto his for a brief second, before he leans in to kiss you softly on the lips. It's quick and gentle, and when he pulls back, he's still smiling. "See?" he says, his voice a comforting murmur. "It's not so scary." The warmth of his hand and the softness of his kiss linger on your skin, leaving you feeling more motivated than ever to take the next step with Yū.
Encouraged by Suguru's kindness and guidance, you take a deep breath and lean in,  aiming for a kiss on the lips. Your heart races as your eyes close and your lips meet. The kiss is delicate at first, a soft brush of your mouth as you try to imagine Yū's reaction. But when you feel Suguru's hand gently cradle the back of your head, pulling you closer, you relax into it, letting the warmth of his lips guide you. The kiss deepens, becoming more earnest as your arms instinctively wrap around his neck. 
When you finally pull away, both of you are smiling, the awkwardness of the moment replaced by a sense of shared accomplishment. "Thank you, Suguru," you whisper, your cheeks flushed. "I think I'm ready now."
"Alright," he says, his voice slightly huskier than before. He scoops closer to you, placing a hand on your waist and the other hand on the side of your face, tilting it slightly to the side to show you how to angle your head for a more intimate kiss. "Now, let's try again," he whispers, his breath caressing your ear. This time, when your lips meet, there's no hesitation. You mimic the passion he had shown you, feeling your heart race even faster. Suguru's hand on your waist tightens slightly, guiding you to lean into him as your kiss becomes more intense. He moves his hand to the back of your neck, his thumb brushing against your skin as he shows you how to deepen the kiss. You follow his lead, exploring the sensation as your tongues tentatively touch. It's a moment of pure closeness, your breath mingling as your body leans into his on its own. When you pull back this time, you're both breathless, your eyes wide and searching for approval. Suguru's smile is warm and proud. "You've got it," he murmurs. "Now, just remember this feeling when you're with Yū." With a final peck on the lips, he leans back, giving you space to process what just happened. Inside, you're overfilled with emotions, but you know that you're ready to face Yū and express your feelings in the way you've always wanted to. Or at least that's what you think for now.
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As the days pass, missing Suguru's lips becomes a constant ache in your heart. Each time you kiss with Yū, the one on your mind is Suguru and you can't help but feel a mix of fondness and guilt. You love Yū, so why practice with Suguru lingers in your mind? The more you think about it, the reality of the situation starts to sink in. That Yū doesn't feel the same way as Suguru. That the kiss with Suguru meant more to you than just a rehearsal. The thought of losing either of them weighs heavily on your conscience, and you find yourself caught in a whirlwind of uncertainties and feelings. You decide to keep the secret buried, focusing instead on strengthening your relationship with Yū. Yet, every time you're around Suguru, you can't help but feel the electricity between you, a silent reminder of the moment you shared under the guise of "practice".
The memory of Suguru's lips lingers, leaving a gentle imprint on yours. Each time you see him in the hallway, share a laugh in class, or catch a glimpse of his concerned gaze, the intensity of those kisses echoes through your thoughts. The guilt of keeping this from Yū gnaws at you, but the fear of losing either of them is paralyzing. You convince yourself that it was just a friendly gesture, a way to help a friend in need. But deep down, you know it was more than that. It was a spark that ignited something within you, something that makes you question the boundaries of your relationships and the true nature of your feelings that maybe unknowingly you've been pushing deep into the corners of your brain. You find yourself lost, torn between the comfort of your current romance and the exhilarating thrill of a new, unexplored connection. Yet, you remain silent, the secret nestled in your heart, waiting for the right moment when you'll have the courage to face the truth of your feelings and the consequences that are about to emerge.
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A couple of days later, you find yourself in Yū's door room after lessons, the setting sun casting a warm glow through the curtains. You've decided it's time to take the leap and show him how much you truly care and want him. As you nervously approach the moment, you start to unbutton his shirt, your hands shaking slightly from anticipation. He smiles at you, his eyes filled with love and excitement. However, when he notices the blush on your cheeks and the way your eyes dart to his mouth, he seems to understand that this might be more than you're used to. He gently takes your hand in his and stops you from unbuttoning his pants. "Please stop," he says softly, his voice filled with concern. You bite your bottom lip, feeling a mix of embarrassment and frustration at your inexperience and him stopping you. You just nod and lean in for a kiss, but he turns away. The passionate kiss you had shared with Suguru fills your mind, now feeling awkward with the weight of your secret pressing down on you. Yū seems to sense your unease and pulls close, stroking your cheek with his thumb. "We should go slow," he whispers, trying to comfort you. But as the silence stretches out, you realize that you're not ready to face the truth of what you're feeling and he's not ready for what you seek. 
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That night, unable to shake off the lingering confusion and yearning, you find yourself standing in front of Suguru's dorm room. Your hand hovers over the door, unsure if you should knock or turn back. The sound of doubt in your mind grows louder, but the memory of the kiss, the warmth of his embrace, and his gaze push you forward. You finally muster the courage and knock softly. The door opens to reveal Suguru in his shorts and a loose shirt, his eyes widening in surprise as he sees you. "Hey, what's up?" he asks, his voice gentle. You swallow hard, trying to push the words out of your mouth. "I... I need to talk to you," you stutter, your heart racing. He steps aside, inviting you in with a concerned look, and once the door is closed behind you, you take a deep breath.
"I think Yū, doesn't want me. Well, of course, now we kiss, but..." you started while pacing around his room, "I wanted to try... something more but he pushed me away."
Suguru's expression turns from surprise to concern as he watches you pace, his eyes following your every move. He can see the hurt in your eyes. He gently takes your hand, leading you to sit beside him on the bed. "What do you mean, 'something more'?" he asks, his voice tender and understanding. You look down at your hands, fidgeting with your fingers as you struggle to find the right words. "I...I want to be closer to him, body to body, and... Ugh! You know what I mean" you admit. "But every time I try, it feels like there's a wall between us. I know that I've never done those... dirty things but still. If this keeps going we'll break up for sure”. The silence that follows is thick with unspoken emotions, until finally, Suguru speaks up, his voice serious. "If you're not happy with the pace of your relationship with Yū, maybe you should talk to him about it," he suggests, his thumb tracing circles on the back of your hand. His touch sends a jolt of electricity through your body, and for a moment, you're lost in the memory of your kisses. You nod slowly, knowing he's right, but the fear of losing either of them keeps you from saying what's truly in your heart. "I'll think about it," you murmur, standing up to leave. As you turn to go, Suguru's hand reaches out to grab your wrist, his eyes locking onto yours. "But remember," he says, his voice filled with a quiet intensity, "I can help you with anything you want, we're friends after all." The weight of his gaze makes your heart ache with a love that goes beyond friendship, and for the first time, you realize that the line between practice and reality may have been blurred more than you ever intended.
You nod again, unable to find the words to express the storm of emotions inside you. With a forced smile, you pull away from Suguru's grasp and head for the door. "Thanks, Sugu'," you whisper, your voice full of sadness. As you step into the hallway, you lean against the door for support, trying to compose yourself. Your heart feels like it's about to burst from everything and now from feeling kind of disappointed that tonight nothing more happened with Suguru. You know you can't keep pretending with Yū, and you can't ignore what happened with Suguru. You walk back to your room, the gravity of the guilt pressing down on your shoulders. 
The silence in your room offered no escape from the thoughts. You slip into bed, your mind racing with images of Yū and the gentle way he holds you, the way his eyes light up when you're together. But as your hand slips under the covers to find some relief from the growing tension in your body, it's not Yū's face that appears in your mind, but Suguru's. The memory of his kiss, the way he touched you, and the passion in his eyes during those "practice" sessions flood your senses. Despite your best efforts to think of Yū, it's Suguru's name that slips from your lips in a soft, involuntary moan. Your touch becomes more urgent, your body responding to the memory of his embrace rather than your boyfriend's. As you reach your climax, the guilt crashes over you like a wave. The stark realization hits you that your desires have shifted, and you're no longer sure who holds the key to your heart. The lines between friendship and love have become blurred, you need to confront your feelings and face the consequences, no matter how painful it may be.
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The next day, you find yourself back at Suguru's dorm room door, feeling both nervous and aroused. You've been craving the intimacy you shared during your "practice session," and you know that he's the only one who can give it to you. This time, you don't bother to knock; you just walk in and step inside. He's sitting at his desk, engrossed in a book, but looks up when he hears you enter. "Hey," he says casually, but his brows furrow when he sees the look on your face. "What's wrong?"
"I... I need more practice," you say, your voice quiet. The words hang in the air, as Suguru sets his book aside, his gaze pinning onto you as he stands up and walks over to you. "Are you sure about this?" he asks, his voice laced with concern. You nod, unable to hide the desperation in your eyes, he sighs, understanding what you're going through, no matter how happy he feels - especially after months of loving and craving you. "Alright," he says, his voice serious. "But remember, we're just friends, okay?"
Without waiting for your response, he takes your hand and leads you to the bed. Your heart races as you sit down, knowing that what you're about to do is wrong, but you can't seem to help yourself. Suguru sits beside you, his hand resting on your knee. He leans in and whispers, "What do you want to learn today?"
You take a deep breath and look into his eyes. "Something more than kissing," you murmur,  looking down. He nods slowly, as his hand moves up to cup your cheek. "Then, let's get started your today's lesson."
And with that, the line between your friendship with Suguru was crossed with no point of return. His lips are on yours, his hands exploring your body in a way that Yū never has, and you can't help but wonder if this is where you truly belong. The guilt is pushed out by the overwhelming pleasure of the moment. As you kiss him deeply, his hands are slowly going under the rim of your shirt, gently touching the skin under it.
The warmth of his touch makes you lean into him, eager to feel more. Suguru's hands continue to roam, his fingertips tracing the curves of your body, you find yourself responding to his touch, your body arching towards him as he takes off your shirt and throws it on the floor, revealing your breasts to the soft light of the room. He looks at you with a mix of awe and hunger, after all his waiting. He leans in to kiss your neck, his breath hot against your skin as he whispers, "Do you like it?" You nod, your voice barely a whimper as he takes one of your breasts in his hand, his thumb teasing your nipple until it's a hard peak. The pleasure is intense, and you can't help but moan his name, the sound echoing through the quiet room. His mouth follows his hand, capturing your nipple in a gentle suck that sends bolts of pleasure through your body, making you squirm with need. The reality of what you're doing hits you, but the desire is too strong to resist. You're lost in the moment, your body craving the connection that Suguru provides, even as your mind reels with the thought of what this means for your relationship with Yū. 
As Suguru's kisses and caresses grew bolder, your body was responding to his every touch with fervor. You found yourself craving more, leaning into his embrace as he navigated places nobody touched you before. You reached up to tangle your fingers in his hair, pulling him closer as you arched your back, giving him access to your neck. His hand trailed down your stomach, and you felt your breath hitch when he took off your shirt, letting it fall to the floor. Your heart raced as he kissed you, his hand moving to cup your heat through your shorts, his thumb circling the clit, hid behind the fabric, that was begging for his touch. Your breaths came in shallow panting as you felt craving more and more of his touch. 
Without breaking the kiss, Suguru's hand slipped under the waistband of your shorts, his fingers finding the wetness of your pussy. He groaned into your mouth as he felt the heat and wetness, his desire for you growing even stronger. He gently pushed aside the fabric and began to stroke you lightly, his thumb circling your clit. You moaned into his mouth, your body trembling as he teased you closer to the edge. Then, with a sudden urgency, he broke the kiss and moved down, his mouth replacing his hand as he slowly licked and kissed along your inner thighs, his warm breath making you shiver. When his tongue finally reached your core, you couldn't hold back the gasp that escaped your lips. He took his time, savoring every inch of you, his tongue flicking against your clit in a way that made your toes curl. The sensation was new and overwhelming, and you felt your body tense up as the pleasure built inside of you. You gripped his hair tightly. Suguru looked up at you, his eyes sparkling as he was now pussy drunk on you. Something he wanted for so long, now happening.
As Suguru's tongue bullied your clit, he gently inserted one finger into your tight, virgin pussy, feeling you tense around him. He moved slowly, giving you time to adjust to the new sensation. His eyes never left yours, he watched as you bit your lip and your breathing grew erratic. He knew he had to be delicate, but he also knew that he wanted to show you how much he wanted you to break in his hands. As he continued to explore you with his mouth and finger, the pleasure grew more intense, and you felt yourself getting closer. Yū and your relationship with him were pushed away as your body focused only on Suguru and his touch. This was a moment you never thought you'd experience with only Yū, but here you are, with your best friend between your legs. His movements grew more confident, his finger moving in and out of you with a gentle rhythm that matched the flicks of his tongue. You couldn't hold back anymore, and with a strangled cry, you came for the first time with someone else's touch. Suguru looked up at you, his face glistening with your juices, a smug smile playing on his lips as he knew he was the only one to make you feel this way. He gently kissed your inner thigh before pulling away, leaning over you, and letting you taste the sweet juices on his tongue while his hands quickly took away your and his underwear. 
Suguru pulled back, breaking the kiss just to reach into his drawer, and pull out a condom. You watched him, your heart racing as he rolled it on, his dick ready with need, precum dripping from his tip. "I'm just gonna rub," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "You'll go all the way with Yū." He kissed you again, his hand guiding his cock to your entrance. With a gentle push, he began to rub against you, the friction sending pleasure through your body. Suguru leaned down, leaving kisses all over you as he continued to rub, his cock teasingly sliding against your wetness without entering you.
The pleasure grew unbearable as Suguru's cock slid against your pussy and clit, and before you knew it, the tip of him accidentally slipped inside of you. You gasped into his mouth while frowning and he froze for a moment, looking into your eyes with a mix of shock and concern. "It's your fault," he murmured against your lips, "you're too wet." You couldn't find the words to protest as he gently pressed his soft lips against your forehead. The initial pain was overwhelming, but it soon gave way to a deeper, more intense pleasure as he stretched you out. His eyes never left yours, searching for any sign of distress, but all he found was the same yearning that reflected in his own. He began to move slowly, letting you get used to the feeling of him inside you, his movements tender and deliberate. With each stroke, the pain subsided, and the pleasure grew until it was all you could feel. You wrapped your legs around him, urging him closer, repeating his name as if it was a prayer. Suguru's breathing grew ragged, his eyes glazed over with passion as he claimed you fully, his cock sliding in and out with ease now. Your body felt like it was on fire, every nerve ending alight with sensation as he pushed you towards the orgasm once again. It was at this moment that you knew the truth of your heart, that no matter how much you cared for Yū, it was Suguru who truly made you feel alive and wanted. And as you reached your peak, your walls tightening around him, he looked at you with a smug smile.
Suguru's hips began to move with more urgency, his cock plunging into you with a steady rhythm that had you digging your nails into his muscular upper arms. You moaned loudly as his movements grew stronger and more erratic. The sounds of your moans and his grunts filled the room, mixing with the slick sounds of skin on skin and the wet sloppy sound of his pretty dick bullying you. His hands gripped tightly your breasts as his lips clashed against yours. Each thrust seemed to be claiming you, marking you as his. Despite the guilt that lurked in the back of your mind, you couldn't deny the feeling of rightness that accompanied his touch. The pleasure was like nothing you'd ever felt before, and you knew at that moment that you'd never be able to go back to the way things were with Yū. You were lost in Suguru. And as he reached his climax, filling the condom with his warmth, you felt the first crack in the dam holding back your rationality. This was where you belonged, wrapped in his arms, not Yū's. 
As Suguru's thrusts slowed and his breathing evened out, you clung to him, your legs tightly wound around his waist pushing him deeper in you. The tears streamed down your cheeks. You kissed him desperately, each kiss tasted of salt and love, a bittersweet reminder of the secret you now had to carry. You knew you had crossed a line, one that could never be uncrossed, and yet you felt an overwhelming need to be closer to him still. As he pulled out, the emptiness inside you was unbearable, a contrast to the warmth that had filled you so completely. 
You looked up at Suguru, your eyes shimmering with a mix of emotions. "What will you teach me next?" you ask quietly. Suguru's expression was a blend of satisfaction and love. He leaned down and kissed you gently, tasting the salty traces of your tears on your lips. "We'll figure it out," he murmured, his voice soothing. "But for now, let's just enjoy the moment." He pulled you into a warm embrace, his arms enveloping you as if he didn't want to let you go back to Yū, greedily wanting to keep you only for himself. The comfort of his touch was undeniable, and you couldn't help but melt into his arms. 
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As the days went by, the weight of your secret grew heavier with each passing moment. You knew you couldn't continue like this, living a lie with Yū while your heart and body craved Suguru's touch. After a sleepless night, you made the painful decision to end things with Yū. It was a decision that was necessary. 
The next day, you gather your courage and head to Yū's dorm room, your heart heavy with the weight of your decision. You know this conversation will be difficult, but you can't ignore the truth any longer and live in this situation - forcing yourself and lying to him. Knocking softly, you enter, and he looks up from his bed, a smile fading as he reads the seriousness on your face. You sit down beside him, your hands trembling slightly. "Yū," you begin, "I need to tell you something." He sits up and looks at you with eyes full of concern. "What is it?" he asks gently. You take a deep breath, feeling the tears threaten to spill over. "I've been thinking a lot, and I don't think I can be the girlfriend you deserve," you say, trying to keep your voice steady. His expression falls, and he takes your hand in his, squeezing it tightly. "What do you mean?" he asks, his voice cracking. You look down at your lap, unable to meet his eyes. "I've realized that... We don't really match," you confess, the words feeling like a betrayal as they leave your lips. Yū's hand goes slack in yours, and the room is filled with a deafening silence. "I'm so sorry, Yū. I never meant for this to happen. I think we should break up," you murmur, your voice breaking. "But we'll still be friends, right?" The desperate hope in his eyes breaks your heart even further. You nod, unable to speak, as he pulls you into a tight hug. You can feel his shoulders shaking with silent sobs, and you know that this is the end of the relationship you once cherished. But deep down, you can't help but feel a spark of excitement, knowing that now, you're one step closer to exploring the love that has been growing between you and Suguru.
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The days that followed were filled with a whirlwind of emotions as you and Suguru explored the new depth of your close relationship. Every touch, every kiss, every whispered word was laced with a mix of passion and love. He was tender and attentive, eager to learn your every want and need, making sure each moment was as perfect as the last. The guilt of your past with Yū was slowly replaced by the warmth and love that Suguru brought into your life. You found yourself blossoming under his affection, feeling cherished and desired in ways you never had before. Each time you looked into his eyes, you saw a reflection of the love that was growing stronger with every shared secret and every intimate moment. The world around you was painted in vibrant colors, and every step you took together felt like the start of an adventure. Suguru had become your anchor, and you knew that no matter what the future held, you two found each other forever as the red string would keep you together.
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170 notes · View notes
moonstruckme · 7 hours
Text
Hi! My inbox is being evil again (it's trying to keep us apart!) and temporarily deleting the exact requests I want to find, so here's a copy+paste of the request I got and thank you so much anon :)
could you do a james x fem!reader where he helps her through a particularly bad panic attack and then just cuddles her and grounds her again? i get them all the time and the thought of the comfort just makes me feel better :,)
cw: modern au, panic attack
James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 730 words
James knows it’d be no help to tell you how scared these attacks make him, but they do make him very scared. He imagines it’s not too different from your reasoning right now; he knows, ultimately, that you’ll be alright, but the thought doesn’t provide as much comfort as it should when he’s watching you with your breaths coming quick and short and your nails digging into your own palm like you can hurt yourself worse on the surface that whatever’s doing this to you. 
He starts there. Takes your hand and uncurls your fingers, threading them through his. 
“You’re okay,” he tells you, sitting on the coffee table with his knees touching yours. He shuts the computer on your lap, easing it out of your grip to move it away. “Take a breath, sweetheart.” 
If you can still hear him you show no sign of it. A tear forms in the corner of your eye, falling when you blink. He can feel your heartbeat jumping where the base of his palm rests over your wrist. 
“Can I give you a hug?” 
There, a slight nod. James curls towards you eagerly, if a bit awkwardly, his knees on either side of your thighs and sitting a bit taller than you while he rubs your back. He makes big, sweeping circles, hoping to lull you with the slow pattern. Tears slug down your cheeks in curved lines, his shirt collecting their damp masses. 
“It’ll pass, angel. It always does, yeah? I know it feels like it’s not going to get better, but it will. You’re doing so good. So, so good, my love.” 
Your breath wheezes slightly on the way in, evidence of your diligent efforts, and when it comes out a low, pained sound comes with it. James feels it deep in his throat. He increases his pressure on your back. 
“Is this okay?” he worries, then feels shitty. You’re hardly up for questioning right now. He tries to sound certain. “Focus on my hand, angel. You’re okay, I’ve got you. Take a big breath for me.” 
He feels you try, your little sob when it doesn’t go as deep as either of you want. 
“I can’t—” 
“You can, it’s alright. You’re already doing so much better, see? It’s going away.” 
This one is worse than some of the others James has sat through with you. It seems to take ages for your breathing to slow down, and a while after that until he feels your heart find a somewhat normal rhythm under his palm. 
He knows you’re with him, more present, when you move your legs to give him easier access to you. James adjusts eagerly, giving you a proper hug. Your crying is less stilted now. He never thought he’d be so relieved to hear you sniffle and weep on his shoulder. 
“There you are,” he sighs, holding you tight. “You did it, sweetheart.” 
“James,” you whimper. 
“I know, but you’re okay. Keep breathing nice and deep,” he reminds you, worried another one will start up. “You made it. Now all you have to do is take it easy for a while.” 
“Thank you.” Your voice is a soft, small thing. It encourages James back from you, though only far enough to see your face. One tear hangs from your bottom lashes like a dewdrop from a petal. When he kisses beneath your eye it transfers to his skin. 
“No thanks necessary.” He kisses you on your other cheek, just to make it even. “You did all the hard work yourself.” 
“Still,” you say, a bit wobbly, “thanks.” 
James frowns. He allows himself to stop rubbing that same endless circle on your back, brushes a piece of hair away from your face. “Anytime,” he tells you sincerely. 
The worst of your crying seems over, but the look you give him suggests you might start again. James likes to think of himself as a man unafraid of tears and strong emotions; he’ll let you cry all night if that’s what you need. Still, he’d prefer to avoid it. 
“How do you feel?” he asks quickly. “Do you want some water? We could go for a walk, it might help to be outside.” 
You don’t want to do either of those, but you do consent to another hug. Which, really, is a better outcome than he’d dared to hope for. 
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writeriguess · 13 hours
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Could you write something with Love and Deepspace Sylus x female reader, where they are always bickering and reader has a huge crush on him but she thinks he hates her. But one day, after Sylus sees her being tender with someone else, he gets so incredibly jealous of her and they have a makeout session against the wall.
The ship hummed quietly beneath your feet, its distant sounds blending with the ambient noise of the deep space beyond the hull. You sat at one of the control panels, fingers deftly typing in commands. Everything on board was routine—far too routine, considering the heated tension that had been building over the past few weeks.
"Are you even paying attention, or are you just pretending to know what you're doing again?"
His voice cut through the silence like a sharp blade, and you rolled your eyes before turning around, already anticipating the sight that greeted you. Sylus leaned against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, that smug expression of his plastered on his face. His fiery red eyes gleamed under the dim lights, standing out against his pale, almost ghostly white hair that framed his angular face. His lips curved upward, taunting, always taunting.
"Well, look who's finally decided to grace us with his presence," you shot back, unable to resist the usual banter. It had become second nature by now, the back and forth, the teasing, the bickering. Sylus always had a way of getting under your skin, and you hated how easily he did it. Worse yet, you hated how it made your pulse race, how it made your heart stutter every time he was near.
He sauntered over to your side, leaning close enough that you could feel the heat of his body. His breath tickled the side of your neck, but you didn’t dare show how much it affected you.
"If you mess up one more time, I swear I'll—"
"You'll what?" You snapped, spinning in your chair to face him. The space between you was minimal now, the tension palpable. His smirk widened, and those red eyes narrowed slightly, as though he was enjoying how easily he could rile you up.
"I'll take over, obviously. Can't have someone as incompetent as you handling sensitive equipment." His voice dripped with mockery, but there was something else there—something darker, something unspoken. And for a split second, his gaze flickered, betraying an emotion that was neither mockery nor irritation. It was gone as soon as it appeared, leaving you questioning if you’d imagined it.
"I think I can handle myself just fine, thanks," you muttered, trying to ignore the way his presence made you feel. Every time he was near, it was like your nerves were on fire, every word out of his mouth was like gasoline to the flame that burned deep within you.
The truth was, you had a huge, embarrassingly intense crush on Sylus. But he made it impossible for you to act on it—he was always pushing you, always teasing, always acting as if you were beneath him. There were days when you wondered if he truly hated you, and others when you thought, just maybe, he might feel something different. But then he'd pull some stunt like this, and you'd remind yourself that it was probably all in your head.
You stood up abruptly, needing to put some distance between you before you lost control of the situation—before you gave away too much. "If you're so worried about it, why don't you handle the panel yourself?"
His smirk widened, but you didn’t stick around long enough for him to respond. You strode out of the control room, down the narrow hallway of the ship, your heart pounding far too hard for what should have been a simple interaction.
You needed to get a grip. Sylus was nothing but trouble, and you knew it. Yet, you couldn’t help the way your stomach flipped every time he was near. It was pathetic, really, but that didn’t stop the way your thoughts constantly drifted back to him.
Several hours passed before you found yourself in the ship’s common area, trying to distract yourself by talking to one of the crewmembers. He was a newer recruit, younger, eager to please, and he hung onto your every word. You laughed at something he said, a soft sound, but genuine. It felt good to relax, to have a moment where you weren’t constantly on edge.
That was, until you felt the weight of a familiar gaze on you.
Sylus stood at the entrance to the common room, his eyes locked on the two of you, his expression unreadable. But his eyes—those crimson eyes—burned with something dangerous. You could feel the intensity from across the room, and it sent a shiver down your spine.
You tried to ignore him, turning your attention back to the conversation, but it was impossible. Sylus was like a storm, unpredictable and overwhelming, and you were helpless to escape it.
After a few minutes, you excused yourself from the conversation, your nerves frayed by the feeling of Sylus’s gaze still boring into you. As you moved to leave the room, you barely made it past the door before a hand grabbed your wrist, yanking you sharply to the side. You were slammed up against the wall, the breath knocked out of you as Sylus’s body pressed against yours, trapping you between the cold metal wall and the heat of his presence.
"Sylus, what the hell—"
"You think I don’t see what you're doing?" His voice was low, dangerously quiet, but filled with something wild, something possessive. His eyes were darker now, the red burning brighter, and the usual cocky smirk was gone, replaced by something raw and fierce. "You think I didn’t notice you laughing with him? Touching him?"
You blinked, taken aback. "What are you talking about?"
"Don’t play dumb with me." His grip on your wrist tightened, and you could feel his breath against your skin, harsh and uneven. "You think I’ll just stand by while you… while you act like that with someone else?"
Your mind raced, trying to piece together what he was saying. Was he—was he jealous?
"Sylus, it was nothing. I was just talking to him."
"Talking?" His lips curled in a sneer, but there was a vulnerability in his eyes, a fear, even. "That’s not what it looked like."
You opened your mouth to protest, but before you could say anything, his lips crashed down on yours, rough and demanding. Your body tensed in shock, but it only took a second for your instincts to take over. You kissed him back, hard, matching his intensity, your fingers gripping his shirt as his body pressed tighter against yours.
His hand slid up to cup the back of your neck, holding you in place as his lips moved over yours with a fierce hunger, as though he’d been holding back for far too long. The kiss was messy, desperate, both of you pouring weeks—no, months—of pent-up tension and frustration into it.
You gasped as his teeth grazed your lower lip, and he took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, his tongue invading your mouth, claiming you. Your head spun, overwhelmed by the sheer force of him, of the way his body moved against yours, pinning you so completely to the wall.
Every touch, every movement was filled with heat, with want. His hand slid down your side, gripping your waist possessively, pulling you closer as if he couldn’t bear to have even an inch of space between you. His other hand tangled in your hair, tugging slightly, sending a jolt of pleasure through you.
You broke the kiss, gasping for air, but he didn’t stop. His lips moved to your neck, hot and insistent, and you couldn’t stop the soft moan that escaped your lips as he sucked at the sensitive skin just below your ear.
"You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this," he growled against your skin, his voice rough, filled with an emotion you hadn’t expected—desire, need, and something more. "No idea how hard it’s been to keep my hands off you."
Your heart pounded in your chest, your mind reeling. Sylus—arrogant, infuriating Sylus—wanted you? You didn’t have time to process it before his lips found yours again, and you were lost in the intensity of the moment, in the way his body moved against yours, demanding, unrelenting.
And in that moment, you realized that maybe, just maybe, he didn’t hate you after all.
Requests are open. Send as many as you like at once.
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xo100 · 7 hours
Text
Baking cookies pt. 3- LN4
*:・゚ Summary: Lando and Y/N confess their feelings, agreeing to take things slow, while Nina continues to brighten their lives.
*:・゚ Word count: 1237
masterlist / community / request / previous ౨ৎ next
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౨ৎ
The next morning felt different. Not in a drastic, world-shifting way, but in the small, quiet way things change when you finally admit how you feel about someone who’s been in your life for so long. The sun filtered through the curtains in Lando’s living room, casting soft shadows on the walls, and Y/N sat at the kitchen table, absentmindedly scrolling through her phone. She wasn’t thinking about the articles in front of her, though. Her mind was on Lando—and the kiss they shared the night before.
She could still feel the warmth of his lips, the gentle way his hand had cradled hers. The memory made her heart skip a beat, and she couldn’t help but smile.
“Morning, sleepyhead.”
Y/N’s head snapped up at the sound of Lando’s voice. He was standing in the doorway, leaning casually against the frame, his hair still messy from sleep. He looked comfortable in a worn T-shirt and sweats, a soft grin tugging at the corners of his lips.
“Morning,” she replied, her cheeks flushing slightly at the memory of last night.
Lando pushed himself off the doorframe and walked over to her, dropping into the chair across the table. He rested his elbows on the table, leaning forward with that same playful glint in his eyes that Y/N had seen countless times—but now, it felt different. There was something deeper behind it.
“How’d you sleep?” he asked, his voice soft.
“Good,” Y/N answered, smiling. “You?”
“Best I’ve slept in a while,” Lando replied, his gaze locked on hers.
For a moment, they just stared at each other, the weight of their newfound connection hanging in the air. It was comfortable, but there was a spark between them, something quietly electric that hadn’t been there before.
But before they could say anything more, the familiar sound of little feet running down the stairs interrupted them.
“Daddy! Auntie Y/N!” Nina’s voice called out as she bounced into the kitchen, her curly hair wild and her face full of excitement. “I’m hungry!”
Y/N and Lando exchanged a quick glance before they both burst into laughter. The moment was broken, but in the best way—Nina always had that effect.
“What’s on the menu today, munchkin?” Lando asked, ruffling Nina’s hair as she climbed onto Y/N’s lap.
“Pancakes!” Nina declared with a big grin.
Y/N smiled, hugging Nina tightly. “Pancakes, huh? I think we can make that happen.”
“Yay!” Nina clapped her hands excitedly, bouncing on Y/N’s lap.
Lando got up from his chair, heading toward the fridge. “Alright, team pancake, let’s get to work.”
As Lando started gathering ingredients, Y/N helped Nina down from her lap, and together, they got to work in the kitchen. It was something they had done countless times before, but this time felt different. Everything did.
The three of them moved around the kitchen with ease, like a well-practiced routine. Nina poured the flour, Y/N mixed the batter, and Lando flipped the pancakes, tossing in an extra bit of flair for Nina, who giggled with every flip.
At one point, Lando leaned over to Y/N, his voice low and teasing. “You know, I think you’re rubbing off on me.”
Y/N raised an eyebrow, laughing softly. “Oh yeah? How so?”
“Well,” Lando said, holding up a pancake with a lopsided heart shape in the middle, “I’m starting to get pretty good at these.”
Y/N shook her head with a smile, nudging him playfully. “Sure you are.”
They shared another quiet moment of laughter, but this time, there was an undeniable tenderness in it. Lando’s hand brushed against Y/N’s as he passed her a plate, and she felt that same warmth flood her chest. The feeling that this was right, that they were right.
-
Once breakfast was done, the three of them sat at the table together, with Nina happily munching on her pancakes while talking animatedly about her day ahead. Lando and Y/N exchanged glances across the table, both of them silently reveling in the ease of this moment. It was just the three of them, but it felt like more.
After breakfast, Lando cleared the table while Y/N helped Nina get ready for the day. As they moved through their morning routine, the unspoken understanding between Lando and Y/N grew. They didn’t need to say anything just yet—there was comfort in the way they worked together, the natural way they fit into each other’s lives.
Once Nina was dressed and ready to play in the garden, Y/N found herself back in the living room, straightening up a few toys Nina had left scattered around. Lando appeared beside her, leaning against the couch as he watched her for a moment, his expression thoughtful.
“Y/N…” His voice was softer now, more serious.
She turned to face him, her heart beating a little faster. “Yeah?”
Lando stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently take hers. “I’ve been thinking about us. About what this means.”
Y/N squeezed his hand, her eyes searching his. “Me too.”
“I know we haven’t really talked about it yet, but I want to make sure we’re on the same page,” Lando said, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. “Because this? This feels like more than just a moment.”
Y/N nodded, her heart swelling at his words. “It is more. It’s everything.”
Lando’s smile was soft but filled with so much emotion that it made Y/N’s chest ache. “I don’t want to rush anything, but… I want this. I want us.”
Y/N took a step closer, her free hand reaching up to rest against his chest. “I want that too, Lando. I want us to figure this out together.”
His hand came up to cup her cheek, his eyes searching hers for any sign of doubt. But there wasn’t any. Y/N was sure of this, sure of them.
“You know, Nina adores you,” Lando said quietly, his voice filled with emotion. “She’s always asking when you’ll come over. And seeing the two of you together… It makes me realize how lucky I am.”
Y/N’s heart melted at his words. She had always loved Nina as if she were her own, and hearing Lando say those things only deepened her feelings for him. “I adore her too, Lando. And I… I adore you.”
His eyes softened, and before Y/N could say anything more, Lando leaned in and kissed her. It was soft and sweet, but this time there was more behind it. The promise of something new, something real.
When they finally pulled away, Y/N rested her forehead against his, their breaths mingling in the quiet space between them. “We’ll take it slow,” she whispered. “For Nina. For us.”
Lando nodded, his smile widening. “Yeah, slow sounds perfect.”
Just as they were about to kiss again, a loud crash echoed from the garden, followed by Nina’s triumphant shout. “I did it!”
Y/N and Lando both burst into laughter, stepping apart as they looked out the window to see Nina standing proudly next to a stack of garden toys she had knocked over.
“We’d better go check on our little troublemaker,” Lando said with a grin, taking Y/N’s hand as they headed outside together.
As they walked into the garden, hand in hand, Y/N couldn’t help but feel like this was the start of something beautiful. A new chapter for all three of them.
And it was exactly where she wanted to be.
౨ৎ
*:・゚ Notes; thank you for reading, love’s! Hope you all enjoyed it! If there is something wrong or need to be edited, let me know! Also I’ve started a community feel free to join! Currently working on part 4! If you want to be tagged leave it in the comments!
Also currently heartbroken by Daniel leaving f1💔
*:・゚tags; @barcelonaloverf1life @fanficweasley @obxstiles @missnxthingg @trisharee @myescapefromthislife
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vrystalius · 1 day
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sniff sniff I SMELL AN AMAZING BLOG!1!1! I REALLY LOVE EVERYTHING YOU WRITE KEEP UP THIS AMAZING MASTERPIECE!1!1! Also can i request the first 3 uppermoons with a female reader human who likes to bite them a lot? Like imagine training and you feel a bite on your shoulder or talking and then! BOOM! reader cutely bites their nose and cheek :3
Biting the Upper Moons
How will the Upper Moons react to their human biting different areas of their body?
Pairing: Kokushibo, Douma, Akaza x reader
Biting areas included: Ear, nose, cheek, bicep, arm
Kokushibo
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Ear: 3/10
To reach his ear, you first have to brush some hair away, meaning Kokushibo will be aware of your intentions. You don’t whisper into his ear out of nowhere, but you do like to bite him there. So, most of the time, he’s simply dodging your attack before you could come any closer. He’s very hyperaware of his senses, meaning he doesn’t want anything to disturb them. Especially his vision and hearing.
“Do not even try.”
Nose: 3/10
Your face rapidly approaching his might suggest a kiss at first, but your mischievous grin told a different story. Similar with ears, Kokushibo simply dodges you. If you annoy him further with attempts to bite him, he’ll threaten to bite you first, flashing his sharp teeth at you. That usually shuts you down and leave him to meditate in peace. Sometimes, in a moment of weakness, he lets you bite his nose. His whole face would scrunch up in dissatisfaction and will remain like that for the rest of the day.
“Why are you so insistent of biting me? Did you have issues during childhood?”
Cheek: 4/10
He barely has any cheeks to bite onto, so you’ll resolve to biting his chin. Again, Kokushibo mistakes you leaning in for you wanting a simple kiss, so he obliged and parts his lips slightly in anticipation. He truly is too trusting with you, he learned that the moment you bit his chin and then scrambled away to hide. He didn’t bother to chase you, it was his fault that he’s letting his guard down like that. Perhaps he’s too lenient and loving with you.
“How foolish of me to think that you, my spouse, wanted affection from me.” (Is he even capable of sarcasm? Everything he says sounds to serious.)
Bicep: 8/10
Feeling you bite his bicep makes him feel oddly proud of his muscles. Is this your way of complimenting his body? Or a way to seduce him? Because weirdly enough, Kokushibo gets aroused when you bite him there. It reminds him of other moments where you desperately hold onto his bicep and shoulders and the way your face contorted into pure ecstasy. Perhaps you biting his bicep like that is your way to invite him into your bedroom? He’ll have to ask you why exactly you chose to bite his bicep out of all places.
“Are you trying to court me, dear? Just say the word and I’m yours tonight.”
Arm: 6/10
You biting his arm randomly during certain tasks amuses him slightly. It’s kind of fascinating to him why you are doing this. Do you crave his attention this badly? Once your teeth sink into his skin, his muscles would tense and Kokushibo might pull you around a little, like how someone would do with a puppy or energetic toddler. But do not expect him to look enthusiastic. His face will remain stone cold while playing tug-war with you. You have to be beware of how easily he gets fed up with the games though.
“Release my arm. Now.”
Douma
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Ear: 6/10
It’s amusing to him how you continue to find ways to catch his attention. If Douma is busy preparing for another sermon, cleaning himself off after a feeding or just simply lounging around, you come up to him and bite his ear. He giggles loudly and would try to bite you back in any way. One time, he snuck up on you. As a payback for biting his ear very harshly that day, Douma wanted to bite yours in return! You jumped very violently once he pounced onto you and bit down onto your ear. From that day on, you now have an additional earhole in your ear for even more jewrely! That was his plan all along! Totally!
“How about I bite your other ear so you have symmetrical ear holes? That way, I can get you even more earrings! Wouldn’t you like that, lotus? …No? Okay.”
Nose: 7/10
It’s so cute to him! You mostly do it when you two nuzzle your noses together affectionately when you chomp down onto his. It surprised him, yes, but it’s so so cute! You being so adorable and just biting him stirs some kind of cuteness-aggression within him. Douma would trap you in his strong and large arms, squeaking and nuzzling his face against you. He’ll probably bite you in all kinds of areas himself during this fit, kicking his feet and grinning brightly.
“You’re so cute! My adorable little human! I could just eat you right up!! Lemme have a taste, hm? May I?”
Cheek: 5/10
Out of all the ways you bit him before, cheek bites are his least favourite. Not that Douma hates it, he just prefers to be bitten in other ways. Cheek bites remind him of cheek pulling, wich reminds him of a way a mother would scold her child. No mother ever bit her child’s cheek as a form of punishment (as far as Douma is aware of), but just feels like it. Gentle nibbles make him grin and pepper your face in kisses, but a whole bite and pull makes him whine loudly. He’d rather not get them.
“Mhh, don’t do that! Ouch… Give me a kiss on the cheek instead!”
Bicep: 8/10
Douma grins at your antics again, but this time, his smile is much more darker. You really are a brave one, aren’t you? Did you forget that he is still a demon? He only lets you bite him because you stir such strong emotions inside of him. Oh if only he can bite you back and taste your flesh on his tongue… You must taste like a heavenly feast, your blood rivalling those of marechi in taste and sacredness. Perhaps if Douma asks nicely you’ll let him try a droplet your blood. But for now, he’ll let you bite his bicep as you please. You look cute while doing it and he can barely feel it tickle, so why not?
“Dear Lotus, how about a little deal? I’ll let you bite down as hard as you like in exchange for a teeny tiny droplet of your blood?”
Arm: 7/10
Aren’t you just adorable! Douma’ll let you bite his arm and maybe even pull some flesh out if you like, as long as you’re enjoying yourself. He likes watching you entertain yourself like this with his body, it’s a great opportunity to observe some human emotions on your face. Seeing you so happy and excited about something simple like biting down onto his arm makes him wonder if you want to bite other areas in his body as well. Douma wonders if you’ll have different reactions to different firmness or taste of his skin. For example, will you bite him more often if he rubs some sugar onto his skin? Or how will you react if you bite his flexed thigh? Oh the opportunities! He might have to write down a list of reactions and behaviours he wants to test out on you!
“Lotus, how about you bite my chest? I can flex them a little and- hm? No, it’s one of my kinks, I’m just curious about something!… No, not like that! My, what a filthy mind you have.”
Akaza
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Ear: 1/10
It sounds weird to him when you nibble his ear. It makes his whole body shiver, and not in a very good way. Akaza will side eye you in slight disgust whenever you even attempt to bite his earlobe. Playing it off and feigning innocence doesn’t help either and he’ll avoid you for the rest of the day/night. He doesn’t want to risk you even thinking about it.
“Don’t. You. Dare.”
Nose: 3/10
Nibbling his nose makes his whole face scrunch up in uncomfortableness. It tickles when you bite his nose and Akaza doesn’t like the way it makes him feel childish. He hates being tickled overall and almost always fights back as gently as he could against your tickle-assault, but you only biting his nose and immediately backing off feels like some kind of way to cheese his reaction. You get to see how his face scrunches together and how much he hates being tickled while also not feeling or seeing the consequences of doing so. Biting and running off is too fast for Akaza to process immediately since he almost always lets his guard down around you to show how much he trusts you. Yet, you prove to him how untrustworthy you truly are, you minx.
“Come back! You don’t get away with this again!”
Cheek: 6/10
Tolerates it at best, pushed you away at worst. Akaza doesn’t really mind you nibbling onto his cheek, as long as you don’t disturb him during something. He’ll actually welcome it when you two are cuddling, for example. He’ll even grin a little at your adorableness when you do, but if you draw his attention away from his training just to nibble against his cheek, Akaza will glare at you. Also, he doesn’t like to admit it, but he also likes to nibble a little on your cheek as well. Especially when Akaza is cuddling you and you blush. Your cheeks are very warm and nice to bite onto!
“Can we do that later? I’m busy right now.”
Bicep: 8/10
Akaza would also feel very prideful when you bite down onto his bicep. He doesn’t want to appear weak in front of you, so he’ll try to figure out when you’re planning to bite him. That way, he’ll flex his whole arm as a way of showing off. But also, that way, you started biting him more less. It’s not so nice to chew onto a boulder-like muscle, so you preferred softer areas in his body (like his cheek). But Akaza wanted you to bite his bicep! He wants you to feel how strong and powerful he is! So, he started offering his not-flexed bicep to bite onto. Now, it’s one of your favourite areas to nibble!
“You’re a really odd one. I chose the weirdest human to love.”
Arm: 7/10
Similar to his bicep, Akaza wants to flex his forearm in order to demonstrate how powerful he is! But after noticing how you preferred softer areas, he reluctantly offered his softened arm to you to bite down onto. Once you start biting down hard, he’ll notify you to stop immediately by flexing his muscle. It’s not like he feels any pain when you bite down as hard as you can, it just… tickles.
“Let go. Let go now. Hey! No! Let go of my damn arm!!”
💠
I am thinking about posting some sort of NSFW drabble for Douma I’ve been thinking about the oast few days… Maybe during Oktober. But anyways, thank you for reading! I hope you’ll continue to enjoy my blog!! Also, I have now written three fics that include biting in some form… does that say something about me or you guys? XD But keep requesting anything you like!!
Anyways, make sure to EAT, SLEEP and DRINK enough!!
Take care of yourselves <3
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pedroshotwifey · 2 days
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what about a drabble about a first date with logan who's trying so so hard to have manners and be a gentleman but he's nervous and keeps messing up and its so adorable and cute????? of course reader tells him to chill out and be his normal fucking self because that's who she likes. I felt so bad for him in a clip that's circulating on tiktok where someone says to him that he's not the kind of guy they'd take home bc that's only for good guys
Okay so I loved this so much and then I got excited ab writing Logan and it turned into more of a fic than a drabble, but here it is 😭
First time writing him so I hope it sounds alright! I did use a little something from the recent movie to add a bit of oomph to the ending. Again, thank you much for this request, it's so cute 🥰
Just realized I made it an f!reader insert, but if you want to message me, I can easily switch some things around and repost if you want a diff reader!
The Right Guy
Pairing: f!reader x Logan/Wolverine
W/C: 1.1k
Fluff/diet angst, Just a few F bombs here, nothing bad (they told me absolutely no coke)
******
You scold yourself as you check the small watch on your wrist for the tenth time in ten minutes. In your defense, the time is absolutely crawling by. Logan should be here for your first date in about five minutes, and you’re nervous as hell.
You’ve been crushing on him since you were hired at the mansion a few months ago, so since he asked you out a week ago, your stomach has been constantly swarmed by butterflies. He’s sweet, funny, carefree, but mature—and not to mention sexy as hell. You really don’t want to mess this up. 
Lucky for you, it seems that he feels the same. He tends to be a little more nervous around you, his blush more prominent when you tease him. It both comforts you and gives you confidence. He seems to genuinely like you for who you are. 
Because of that, you decided to wear your favorite dress for your date. He told you he’d be taking you to a restaurant, but didn’t get specific, so it was honestly the safest choice anyway. It’s one of those that could be casual just as easily as it could be fancy. A few well-selected pieces of jewelry can make a world of difference, after all. 
You glance in the mirror, and then back at your watch. It’s right as the long hand makes a round to signify that it’s two before seven that you hear a sharp knock at your door. You jump up from your seat, slightly startled. If anyone had been in the room with you, you'd probably be embarrassed. 
Thankfully, since you’re home alone, you ignore the scare and head for your front door. You take one more deep breath and pull on the knob to reveal your handsome date. You look Logan up and down, expecting his usual outfit—blue jeans, a white shirt, and either his leather or jean jacket. What you get instead, is a suit. You have to make a physical effort to not show your confusion. Okay, maybe you expected a nicer shirt or something—ironed jeans if he really wanted to go crazy—but a suit? 
“Oh, hey!” Unfortunately, it’s a bit harder to keep the confusion out of your voice. Don’t get it wrong, it’s nice of him to try to dress up for you, and he does look very nice, but he doesn’t look like Logan. Your eyes catch on his hair—the usual tufts you love so much look to be somewhat flattened by a gel. 
It’s while you’re distracted by this that he reveals a hidden hand holding a bouquet of flowers—your favorite, actually. So why do you feel almost…disappointed? No, that can’t be it. It’s so cute that he’s putting all this effort in for you, but you really just want the normal Logan.
“Oh, wow,” you say, trying to shake off whatever this strange feeling is. “Thank you, Logan.” 
You carefully accept the flowers and step aside to let him inside while you put them in water. It’s strange that he hasn’t said anything else yet. Wait, should you say something? No, he usually says something. There’s usually a joke cracked by now. It’s weird that he’s not, right? Ugh, maybe it’s you being weird? The awkward tension between the two of you is suffocating.
You’re almost disoriented with your overthinking as you move about your kitchen, pulling down a vase to fill with tap water. Logan, of course, notices. 
He softly clears his throat. “Everything alright?”
You set the vase down on your island and look at him, lips pursed. Should you say something? Well shit, he probably sees something wrong by now—you’re staring at him like you want to say something. Damn it. 
You open your mouth and close it again. How do you even say what you want to say though? 
“Yeah, everything’s fine,” you lie. Right to his face. 
You smile and walk back to him, trying your best to ignore the expression on his face. Great, now you’re being weird, too. Why the fuck is this weird? 
You breathe out as you close and lock your door, mentally prepping yourself for what you’re really hoping will be a good date. Logan’s waiting for you next to his—
Car? 
Where the fuck is his bike? 
Whatever—it doesn’t matter, it’s fine. Everything’s fine. It’s probably just in the shop or something. 
You give him a tight-lipped smile as you walk to the vehicle, and he opens the passenger door for you. You slide into the seat and wait for him to shut the door before exhaling again. This is all very sweet, but you’ve got to say something. 
You stare at him as he gets into the driver’s seat. Again, he notices. There’s a thick, momentary silence.
“Look, bub, whatever it is, I—”
“You’re not acting like you,” you blurt. 
He stares at you for a second, but you’re pretty sure he knows exactly what you’re saying. You’re pretty sure that’s exactly what he’s trying to do. 
“Logan, you don’t have to put on this show for me,” you say as gently as you can, though it comes out maybe a tad aggravated.
He lets out a slow exhale through his nose and closes his eyes for a blink. You feel bad pointing it out, but there’s no way you can go through a whole date with this stiff act. He opens his eyes back and you offer him a sympathetic smile, your hand reaching out to cup his jaw. He leans into your touch, his own hand coming to envelop yours. 
“I want to go on a date with the Logan I already know, with his bike, and his blue jeans—you move your hand to his hair, messing it up enough to loosen the gel hold—and his crazy ass looking hair.” 
He huffs a laugh, looking at you with tired eyes. You understand how much he must have stressed over all the little details he put in for you. 
“It was very sweet of you to do all this, but you don’t need to perform for me, Lo.” 
He nods slowly, taking a moment to think over everything. “It’s been a long time since I took a chance with somebody,” he confesses, his gruff voice holding an emotion that makes your heart ache for him. “I wanted to be the right guy for you.” 
Your stomach flips. “Logan, you are the right guy for me. You’re always the right guy.” 
Before he can say anything else, you lean forward and plant a kiss on his lips. Surprise halts him for a second, but he’s quick after to reciprocate, his lips moving slowly but passionately with yours. One of his large hands snakes behind you to cup the back of your neck, the other gently tilting your chin. 
You kiss until you’re out of breath, and when you pull away, you let out an airy laugh. Despite the suit, he looks like your Logan again. Wild hair, wild eyes, pink in his cheeks. 
“C’mon, Romeo,” you tease. “Let’s get that damn jacket off and order a pizza and beer.” 
118 notes · View notes
lovelookspretty · 1 day
Text
lover of mine
drew starkey x actress!reader au
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— in which drew and y/n, secretly exes, must fake date in order to keep the peace at a mutual friend’s wedding, but the forced proximity makes them question whether they ever truly moved on.
warnings: FLASHBACK TIME !!!!!
prev
authors note: guys ive lowkey been picturing things as i would direct them in a film or music video so 😭 if my writing angle feels off then thats why. but i hoped u enjoyed anyway !! if u still arent on the tag list, feel free to let me know thru replies, anons, or dms !! notifications are always on <33
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you stepped out of the sleek black car, your heels clicking against the pavement as you’re greeted by a wall of flashing lights and the low hum of the press. the red carpet at the love, simon premiere was buzzing with excitement, packed with celebrities and industry professionals.
this wasn’t your first time walking a carpet, but it was different tonight—there was something in the air, an energy you couldn’t quite place, but it felt like just another event to get through.
you paused in front of the photographers, striking a few effortless poses. to everyone else, you looked like you were in your element—smiling, waving, and giving the cameras exactly what they wanted.
but inside, you were already thinking about when you could leave. you were there because the director was an old colleague from your recent work on tempest, your breakout role. it was your agent’s idea to make an appearance, to be seen and keep your name in the buzz, but you hadn’t really planned to stay long. just the premiere, maybe the afterparty, and then home.
as you moved down the carpet, a journalist caught your attention. “y/n, over here! a quick word?”
you nodded, stepping toward the microphone with a gracious smile. the flashing bulbs intensified as you answered questions about your latest projects, your outfit for the night, and how excited you were to see the film.
“you’ve been busy with tempest—how’s that going?” one interviewer asked.
you offered a polite smile. “it’s been great. we’re still filming season two, so it’s been pretty nonstop, but i’m thrilled to be here tonight to support this movie. i’ve heard such good things about love, simon.”
you kept your responses short but engaging, giving just enough without going too deep. after a few more quick exchanges, you excused yourself, nodding to your team as you made your way inside.
the grand theater lobby was filled with more celebrities and industry insiders, everyone dressed to the nines and mingling, but you were already scanning the room for a drink. maybe a glass of champagne woule make the night pass quicker.
your mind was preoccupied, already drifting toward the idea of heading inside early, when you felt yourself bump into someone. you glanced up, ready to offer a quick apology, but the words froze in your throat the second your eyes locked with his.
he was tall—taller than you expected—with broad shoulders, and his hair was just slightly tousled like he’d been running his hands through it all night. he’s startled at first, like he wasn’t paying attention either, but the moment his gaze met yours, there’s a flicker of something you couldn’t quite place. maybe recognition. maybe awe.
his lips parted slightly, as if he’s about to say something, but he didn’t. instead, he just stared, clearly a little stunned. for a second, you felt like the noise of the room faded into the background, like it was just the two of you standing there.
“sorry about that,” you said first, stepping aside to give him room, your voice casual despite the strange pull you felt from his gaze.
he blinked, shaking his head quickly. “no, no, it’s my fault. wasn’t paying attention.” he rubbed the back of his neck, clearly flustered, and then finally added, “i’m drew, by the way. starkey— drew starkey.”
there was something familiar about the name, but it didn’f immediately click. “nice to meet you, drew,” you replied with a small smile. you glanced past him, ready to move on, but he didn’t make it easy. he was still looking at you, like he was trying to memorize your face, like he’d just seen something—someone—he didn’t want to forget.
“you’re—” he began, but then cut himself off, a little embarrassed. “i mean, i know who you are.”
you raised an eyebrow, curious now. “oh yeah?”
he nodded quickly. “yeah, you’re amazing on tempest. my sisters are obsessed with the show, but i started watching it, too, and— yeah, you’re great.”
his words tumbled out fast and you couldn’t help but be a little charmed by how genuine he sounded. he wasn’t smooth like some of the other people you’d met that night—he wasn’t trying to impress you with industry talk or big names. he was just . . . honest.
“well, thank you,” you said, feeling your cheeks warm a little. “that means a lot.”
there was a brief pause, and you could see him struggling for what to say next. the thing was, it wasn’t awkward—it was kind of endearing. finally, he let out a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck again. “sorry, i didn’t mean to fangirl or anything.”
you laughed softly, shaking your head. “don’t worry, you’re fine.”
he was still standing there, not moving away, and for some reason, you didn’t feel like walking off either. maybe it was the way he was looking at you, like he couldn’t believe he was even talking to you. it’s a look you’d seen before, but it felt different coming from him. there’s no agenda behind it. just . . . admiration.
“so,” you started, trying to keep the conversation going, “what brings you to the premiere?”
he blinked, like he’d forgotten why he was even there. “oh, uh, i’m actually in the movie.”
and that was when it clicked. drew starkey. you heard the name before, seen it in casting lists, but seeing him in person, you hadn’t put it together until now.
“right,” you said, nodding slowly. “that’s why you looked familiar.”
he chuckled softly, but there was still that slight blush on his cheeks. “yeah, that’s me.”
the conversation flowed a little easier after that. you asked him about the movie, and he asked you more about tempest, genuinely interested in your work, not just going through the motions like so many others do at those events. he was funny, too, in a shy, unassuming way that caught you off guard.
as the crowd around you thickened, his eyes never left yours, like he was completely captivated. you weren’t sure how long you stood there talking, but it was long enough for you to forget about slipping out early.
and then, before you knew it, the lights were dimming, signaling that the movie was about to start. he glanced toward the theater doors, then back at you, almost hesitant.
“well, i guess we should head in,” he said, sounding a little disappointed that your conversation was being cut short.
“yeah,” you agreed, though part of you didn’t want the night to end either. as you both moved toward the entrance, something pulled at you to say more, to affirm the spark that had ignited between you. you abruptly stopped in your tracks. he turned to face you, curiosity sparking in his eyes.
“i’ll catch you at the afterparty?” you told him, your voice light and teasing. you watched his face break into a genuine smile, the kind that made his entire demeanor shift from nervous to gleeful.
with that, you turned and headed toward the theater doors, the buzz of chatter and laughter enveloping you. you could feel drew’s gaze lingering on you as you walked away.
you knew you weren’t on the cast so it would have been unexpected if you showed up. but you knew that he’d be there.
as you navigated through the crowd, you couldn’t help but glance back one last time, and in that instant, you caught drew watching you, his expression soft and hopeful. a faint smile tugged at your lips, and finally, you disappeared into the crowds of guests entering the theater, but the memory of his gaze stayed with you.
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the afterparty was a vibrant swirl of lights and laughter, complete opposite to the behavior of the premiere just hours ago. you stood with leila, theo, and gia, the four of you navigating the home.
after a few minutes, you spotted him across the room, laughter dancing in his eyes as he talked to a small group. you excused yourself from your own conversation, weaving through the crowd until you found yourself standing beside him.
and soon, time seemed to slip away as you both dived into deeper conversations about your lives, your careers, and the dreams you’d harbored since childhood. drew opened up about his recent experiences filming, and you found yourself sharing the struggles and triumphs of your own journey in the film industry. every moment spent together felt natural, as if you’d known each other for much longer than just a few hours.
by the end of the night, the party winder down and guests began to trickle out. you exchanged numbers, both of you eager to see each other again. and you did. time and time again.
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you paced around your apartment as you gestured animatedly. throwing your hands in the air, your eyes widened with passion, as if you were trying to grasp an idea that was just out of reach. drew leaned back against the counter, arms crossed, watching you intently with a soft smile playing on his lips.
“i just wanna have some time to go out there and have some fun,” you were telling him, “be there in the moment, explore la. not with any paparazzi there to demand photos of me or take them when i have my guard down. just me and the city.”
as you spoke, your gaze shifted toward the window, where the sun peeked through the window across your living room. you imagined yourself outside, feeling the sun on your skin, surrounded by the pulse of los angeles.
spinning around quickly, your face lit up like you’d just had a revelation. “like starstruck!”
“starstruck?” drew echoed as he squinted his eyes, trying to grasp your idea.
“yeah, you know that one movie on disney? christopher and jessica are running around los angeles in that one scene—” you continued.
“—before they get their car caught in that mud and christopher ditches her at the beach,” he interjected with furrowed brows, knowing full well how the scene played out.
you stopped abruptly, narrowing your eyes at him. you tilted your head, “you wouldn’t ditch me, would you, star?”
drew shook his head, “no way.”
satisfied with his answer, your expression brightened again, and you nodded vigorously. “good. then come on.”
you grabbed your keys from the table and practically dragged him out of your apartment. the door clicked shut behind you, and you led the way down the corridor.
as you made your way into the parking garage, your laughter rung out, echoing off the concrete walls. when you reached your car, you slid in and grabbed your sunglasses from its compartment to slide them on.
drew chuckled as he put his seatbelt on, shaking his head in disbelief. “you really have a plan for everything, don’t you?”
“only when it comes to having fun,” you replied, your grin widening as you pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his head to shield his face. “don’t worry, they’ll never see us coming,” you assured him, your laughter infectious as you started the engine and pulled out of the parking garage.
and over the course of a year, you and drew became inseparable. what started as stolen moments during movie premieres and secret hangouts morphed into a deep, unshakeable friendship.
laughter echoed in your shared memories—late-night talks sprawled on the floor of your apartment, spontaneous adventures through the streets of los angeles, and lazy mornings spent in bed, wrapped up in each other's warmth.
as the seasons shifted, so did the nature of your connection. the boundaries blurred, and your heart raced at the thought of what could be. but you both chose to keep it light, enjoying each moment without the weight of labels.
then one evening, everything changed. it was a night like any other. the winter air was crisp as you and drew strolled through the twinkling streets of los angeles. you were coming back from a cozy evening out, the laughter still lingering between you as you recounted the highlights of the night.
as you walked, the sound of distant pops drawed your attention. you paused mid-sentence, eyes widening as bursts of color lit up the night sky. fireworks!
the brilliant reds, blues, whites, and purples filled the air. a smile spread across your face as you turned to him, the shared excitement pulling you closer together.
“this is so cute,” you said, leaning into drew’s side to admire the display. you were momentarily lost in the beauty, the chaos of colors exploding above you like confetti.
but then you spotted something in the midst of the fireworks—words began to form in the night sky, each letter crafted from the brilliant light.
‘will you be my girlfriend?’ the phrase appeared among the colors, messy yet somehow legible.
you read it, confusion washing over you at first. someone was asking someone else through fireworks? but as you turned to drew, you noticed his gaze, expectant and hopeful. the realization quickly sunk in.
your mouth gaped open in shock, your heart pounding as you processed what was happening. you looked back up at the sky, needing to confirm that this moment was real, that the words were genuinely meant for you.
but you turned back to drew, and without thinking, you nodded. before you knee it, you were jumping into his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck, and holding him tightly. he caught you effortlessly, and you could feel his warmth seep into you as he hugged you back, pulling you close.
you could feel the happiness reflected there, and for the first time, it felt official—no more questions, no more uncertainty. you were exactly where you wanted to be.
and just two years later, you and drew found yourselves on the set of hellraiser, a project neither of you anticipated becoming a part of when you first met. it’s actually funny how it all unfolded.
initially, you weren’t even considering taking the role. after all, you were still knee-deep in filming tempest. the thought of juggling both projects seemed overwhelming, and you were ready to prioritize your current work over anything new.
when drew secured his role in some film, he kept the details to himself, not wanting to distract you from your current commitments. he didn’t mention the movie by name, and you didn’t press him for details; you respected his space and didn’t want to add to your own frustration about whether to accept the new opportunity.
“you should really consider it,” he urged, his voice filled with genuine belief in your talent. “this could be a great chance for you, babe, and imagine how much fun you could have! you’re almost done finishing tempest this month. after that, you’ll have plenty of time for your new project.”
you weighed his words, feeling torn. you loved the idea of the role, but the reality of juggling two major projects felt daunting.
yet, after a long talk about chasing new opportunities and taking risks, you found yourself swayed by his excitement and your own desire for growth. finally, you decided to go for it, officially signing on for the project.
what you didn’t realize, until the casting announcements were made, was that you and drew would be filming in the same movie. when you heard the news, you actually went insane. you felt like the universe was rewarding you for taking that leap of faith. the two of you would not only be working together but doing so on a film that promised to be both challenging and thrilling.
as filming began, the reality of being on set with drew hit you both like a wave. the two of you were navigating the intricate dance of being both co-stars and romantic partners, which brought its own set of challenges.
you found joy in the little things—the shared lunches, the whispered jokes during scenes, and the late-night talks about the original film. every day, you felt grateful to have him by your side, knowing that while the world outside the set may have been chaotic, your little bubble was filled with warmth, support, and your boyfriend. not everyone was able to be in your position.
but it wasn’t the same anymore. at least a year later. you were in another city, staying in yet another hotel room, the kind where the silence hung heavy in the air, almost suffocating. the glow of the city lights outside filtered through the curtains, casting a soft haze over everything.
you rested your back against the cool surface of the wall as you stared out into the city through the window. it was strange—the city was vibrant, loud, yet all you felt was isolation. your reflection stared back at you, tired eyes searching for something, anything, to hold on to.
you let yourself imagine drew standing beside you, his arm slipping around your waist, the warmth of his presence easing the ache that had settled deep inside.
but it was just a fantasy. he wasn’t there. not really. not the way you needed him to be.
he was somewhere else, in another city, on another set. networking. working. living his own life. you both were—careers that had taken off in opposite directions, always moving, always busy, always apart. your schedules were like puzzle pieces that didn’t quite fit together anymore, no matter how hard you tried to force them.
sometimes he would surprise you, show up in whatever city you were in, standing at your door with that smile that used to make your heart race. but even then, it wasn’t enough. when he was there, it felt like you were lying next to a stranger, like everything you shared before felt like a distant memory.
your mind wandered as you stared out the window, trying to remember what it used to be like. the way you used to laugh together, the way he used to look at you like you were the only person in the world. but those moments felt so far away now, like they belonged to another lifetime. your careers were taking off, yes, but your relationship was falling apart.
you tried everything to get him to spend more time with you. it wasn’t just the long phone calls or the quiet hopes you'd whisper when he promised he’d visit, but you actually took action.
you started reaching out to his manager, a move that felt so cold, so far removed from the days when it was just you and him figuring things out together. now, it was emails and calls, hoping to align your schedules like some kind of business transaction.
you’d ask if there was a window, any gap at all, where you could see each other, trying to make sense of his packed days and your own commitments. it felt impersonal, like you were just another appointment penciled into his calendar, waiting to be confirmed.
there were weeks when you’d sit down with your team, trying to move things around, freeing up your time in the hope that his manager would find a slot that worked. you bent over backward, squeezing your own projects tighter so maybe, just maybe, you’d have a few days together. but it always ended the same.
another ‘maybe next time’ or a polite suggestion from his side to ‘keep him updated’—as if he wasn’t even aware of how much you were trying to hold everything together.
what shattered you was seeing him with his costars. scrolling through social media and seeing him hanging out with them after long days on set. grabbing dinner with them, laughing with them, being the drew you used to know—but never like that with you anymore.
he made time for them, he’d pay them visits, go out for drinks, be himself. but not with you. why not with you?
you couldn’t understand it. and that was the worst part. you weren’t jealous of his work or his friends, but it hurt seeing him give them what you so desperately wanted. time. effort. attention. those small moments of connection.
you tried bringing other people into the mix, hoping it would be less pressure for him. leila and theo became your go-to when you were feeling desperate. you’d invite them out, framing it like a casual group hang, knowing that maybe if drew wasn’t faced with just you, he’d be more likely to show up.
you thought maybe he'd feel less cornered, less pressured. and so you'd reach out, asking leila to join you and casually suggesting that maybe drew could come along too. a movie, dinner, anything. you tried to make it seem easy, no big deal.
but he never gave a direct answer. it was always a dance—drew would respond with something vague, something about being busy, or how he’d love to but he wasn’t sure, and he’d get back to you. he’d redirect the conversation, shifting topics before you even realized what had happened. it wasn’t malicious, but it left you feeling hollow, like he wasn’t even aware of how long he’d been doing it, how much he’d been dodging your efforts to pull him closer.
and you couldn’t help but feel bad, feel like you were trying so hard for someone who wasn’t even putting in half as much as you were. it wasn’t like he didn’t care—he was just so wrapped up in his own world, his work, that he didn’t see how hard you were fighting to keep your relationship alive.
you were trying to reach him, but it felt like he was always just out of reach, just beyond the point where you could hold on.
it wasn’t anger you felt toward him, but this deep, aching sadness. because no matter what you tried, it felt like you were the only one trying at all—did he even like you anymore?
and then suddenly, it snapped.
like a taut string pulled too tight for too long, it finally gave way. all the moments you fought so hard for, the endless nights spent hoping, came crashing down in an instant. his words weren’t loud or angry; they were quiet, almost too calm. it was like the end had been sitting between you both for months, waiting to be spoken into existence.
“what?”
your voice was small, a cracked whisper filled with disbelief. you’d heard him—of course, you’d heard him—but it felt so unreal. your heart ached, like it was physically breaking apart, but your mind couldn’t fully process it. it felt like you were standing outside of yourself, watching this unfold, wondering if this was really happening.
“why?” you managed, your voice barely holding together as your eyes searched his face for something, anything that would make sense of this. you saw his regret, the sadness behind his eyes, but there was no answer that would make this hurt any less. his lips parted like he wanted to explain, but there were no words to fix this.
he reached for you, like he thought he could make it better somehow, but you took a step back, your hand instinctively wiping away the tear you didn’t even realize had fallen.
all the effort, all the time you had spent trying to make things work, fighting for what you thought was love—it felt like it had all been wasted. your chest tightened as you stared at him, the silence between you thick and unbearable.
“get away from me,” you whispered, your voice stronger now, though your heart was shattering inside. you waved him off, refusing to let him touch you, refusing to let him see you break any more than you already had.
he hesitated, his hands dropping to his sides as the distance between you widened, both physically and emotionally. it wasn’t just the breakup that hurt—it was everything. all the time you’d given, all the compromises, all the moments you’d spent wishing for more.
you turned around, not wanting him to see the fresh tears that blurred your vision, not wanting him to see how deeply this cut. it wasn’t just about losing him; it was about losing the version of yourself that had believed, that had hoped for something different. something better.
“good luck on everything, drew.”
the words left your mouth before you could stop them, bitter and sharp. it felt like a punch to your own chest, but you had to say it. you had to remind yourself that maybe his career was the priority now, not you. and you needed to remind him of that, too.
even as your throat tightened, and your body threatened to break down entirely, you forced yourself to keep walking.
you didn’t look back. not when the tears started falling faster, not when your hands shook as you unlocked your car door, not even when you could feel his eyes on you, burning into your back like a weight you didn’t want to carry anymore.
the sobs finally broke free once you were inside, gripping the steering wheel so hard your knuckles turned white. he didn’t chase after you, didn’t say another word. he just watched you leave, and that somehow hurt more than anything else.
as you drove away, tears streaming down your face, the weight of it all finally settled in. you didn’t want to hear his excuses, didn’t want to hear whatever reason he thought justified this. you just wanted to go home, to get away from the pain that now felt too familiar, and to leave behind the pieces of your heart that had shattered at his feet.
and just like that, the year of silence between you began.
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131 notes · View notes
sparklingblu · 1 day
Text
Pulse
Sohyun X Xinyu
P.S: I'm trying a new style of writing here.
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There's something calm and comforting about the crowded coffeeshop. The hissing of the espresso machine, the bustle of human conversation, the clinking of ceramic cups - they all seem to blend together to create a new yet totally familiar world. That's the reason I've come here. To be swallowed by this background noise and extract myself from reality if just for a moment.
I sit in my usual corner, my elbow against a cup of cappucino which has long since gone cold and a textbook opened but largely ignored. I have read the same line for the last thirty minutes but none of it seems to stick. I'm too distracted by the noise and my own thoughts, adrift in this place.
University is supposed to be a place where you "find yourself" but I seem to have lost my sense of direction as soon as I step my foot here. Everyone around me seems so sure of what they are doing, raised chests and energetic steps. Meanwhile, I'm just trying to keep my head down, pretending like I belong while I don't even know who I am yet.
Outside, the leaves are just starting to turn yellow - the afternoon light casting a lazy red glow on them. It's the start of a new season though I barely feel like anything have changed in this new life I'm settling into. It's just a struggle to fit in from day to day.
I bring my lips to the rim of my cofee cup, grmiacing as the bitter taste washes over me. It doesn't come as a surprise. The only reason people come here is for the atmosphere - to mingle and jingle . The cofee is just a necessity to stay.
I glance at the moving world from my seat near the window. A steady flow of students rush past the platfrom on the otherside, their laughter echoing through the glass. It's as if they know a secret I have yet to understand.
I pull the sleeve of my sweater over my knuckles, retreating into the soft fabric. Nearby, my phone buzzes with a notification from a group chat that I never have been a part of. I don't bother to check and it becomes one of the many sounds that fills the place.
I used to think university would be different - a total contrast to my mundane high school life. That I'd step into the place and everything will click into place. Like the rest of my life have been a prelude to this. But here I am. Already chickening out in the first week.
I chug down the remainder of my cold coffee, shove my books into the bag and was about to leave when a burst of cool air sweeps through the place, followed by the jingle of the bell above the door. And I happen to be one of those people who instictively gawk at the newcomer.
There she is, waltzing into the room like she owns it. The energy of the outside world seems to radiate from her body. There's nothing loud or brash about her but she draws attention anyway - an easy confidence that ripples through the place. She brushes a stray strand of hair our of her face, her eyes crinkling with amusement.
She stands out naturally,moving as if she's utterly home in her skin, in this place. It's the kind of self-insurance that seems totally foregin to me. I can't even imagine what it's like to be in her shoes. Not like I will have a chance. She's everything I'm not.
Her hair is slightly tousel, falling in loose waves that looks almost intentional. She's wearing a plain white shirt, its crispiness a total contrast to her slouch jeans.
She orders a cofee - espresso, no sugar- and while she waits, she cracks a joke at the waiteress, painting her cheeks red. All this time, my eyes linger on her with a strange sort of fascination, watching like she's the only form of enteratinment I have had in a long time. And it's true in a way.
She takes the plastic cup and the change from the waiteress with a smile. She turns and that's when the trouble starts. I have expected her to leave as swiftly as she has come. Someone like her probably have more important businesses than slothing around.
Her eyes dart around the café and it takes me a moment to realize she's looking for a seat. So she's staying. But luck doesn't seem to be on her side today beacaue every single seat has been occupied. Well, except..
"Hey" she says, and it's casual, like we have been friends forever. "Mind if I sit there?"
She's gesturing at the seat across from mine, which I have strategically left empty to create a distance between me and everything else. I hesistate a tad bit too long before I response.
"Sure" I mumble, nodding towards the chair.
She sits, sliding the cup of coffee on the table with a soft thud. I have expected her to pull out a phone or do anything a stranger sharing a table with another stranger would do. But instead, she leans back and scans the room before her eyes come to rest on me.
"I have seen you before" she speaks, offering a slight smile as if she can read my thoughts.
I blink, caught off-guard. No 'hello' s. No 'hi' s. Straight to the point.
"Have you?" I say, sounding awfully stiff.
"Yeah. You have been in the same corner for the last week. You come here a lot?" She sips her coffee, eyes still on me.
I shrug. "Not always. But yeah. It's quiet"
She raised an eyebrow, glancing around the packed café. "Quiet?" she repeats, half laughing. "Compared to the dining hall, perhaps"
Just then, I realize how rudiculous I must sound. "Well, not today" I admit, lowering my gaze back to the books. "But usually"
She laughs again, but not mockingly so. "I get where you are coming from. Sometimes, it's good to be alone even though you are not truly alone" She couldn't have worded it better.
"Exactly" I say, nodding slowly.
A brief silent passes between us. She sips from her cup again. If the cappucino here is strong, I can't imagine what espresso would taste like. But she shows no sign of distaste.
"So, what do you study?" she asks, her fingers tracing the rim of her cup.
"Literature" I answer, shifting in my seat. For some reason, talking about my major always make me feel like I'm giving something away. Like I'm exposing myself.
"Ahhh Literature" She repeats the word, as if she's trying to decipher its meaning. "That must be....intense. Lots of complicated story about lots of different stuffs"
I nod, still unsure where she's headed. "I guess so. It's more about trying to understand them through their words. Deep fry your brain sometimes"
She huffs. "I can imagine. That's why I try to understand them through their heads, it's less exhausting that way. I'm in psych"
That makes sense. She has this way of speaking, as if she knows what the other party will say before they even open their mouths. But at the same time, respecting their boundaries.
I'm still trying to think of a valid response when she lifts her cup and stare at the remaining coffee like she's studying it. Then her gaze lifts back to me, eyes bright.
"You know, espresso reminds me of people"
I blink, surprised at the strange comparison. "Espresso? Why?"
She beams, leaning in. "Espresso's small right? Concentrated. If you take a sip, there's this rush - sharp and intense. It hits you so intensely that if you are not prepared, it can be overwhelming"
She takes a sip, as if giving me time to register her words. "But if you take it in bit by bit, the taste changes. The bitterness mellows out and you can feel each layer of richness underneath"
I stare at her, my tired brain struggling to understand what she's implying. Why espresso, out of all things?
She leans back and continues. "People are like that. Emotions, life, they come at you in the most unexpected times - swift, chaotic. Sometimes it can be too much to handle. But if you give it some times, let it breathe, you start to see the little parts that makes it up. That's when you start to discover yourself"
I can't help but smile. "You have thought a lot about this, haven't you?"
She shrugs. "Maybe. Or maybe I'm just obsessed with espresso"
"Not the one here, I hope"
She smiles, instantly getting what I'm implying. It seems she's a regular customer too. "You gotta work with what you have. But you get the point"
"So....people are like espresso? Is that why you study them?" I question as she finishes up the last few drops of her coffee. This girl really likes espresso.
"Exactly" she snaps. I'm not sure if she's joking here. "It has always been my dream to do a thesis on espresso and emotions"
"Are you....?" I drift off and she bursts into laughter.
I feel the slightest hint of joy, like by asking that stupid question, I have contributed to her amusement in some way.
"Serious? No way. I'm not risking my degree for my unhealthy addiction. The last person I explained this to leave the table as soon as I'm done"
"Well, I'm still here"
Does it sound too cheesy?
"I can see that" She glances at the clock on the wall, frowning slightly. "I should get going. I have a class to prepared for"
I nod, feeling that familiar twist that comes with endings. "Right. Of course"
She stands, adjusting the bag on her shoulder. "It was nice talking to you" she says, her voice warm. "You can call me Sohyun"
"Xinyu" I reply. It sounds so much easier to say my name now.
"Xinyu" She lets the word roll off her tongue. "I like it"
"Thanks" She's already walking to the door when I response.
With one last glance, she re-enters the reality outside of this comforting bubble. I feel a strange sense of anticipation, like the conversation I just had have dropped some hint to solve this puzzle called life.
Sohyun and Espresso and People.
How peculiar.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
The walk back across the campus was pleasant. The scene that welcomes me when I enter my room is not.
As I enter, I'm greeted by the familiar chaos of Yooyeon's world - clothes draped over the chair, a half eaten bag of snacks spilling out on the desk and music playing softly in the background. The mess have become such an essential part of the space that without it, you doubt you will recognize the room.
Yooyeon looks up from her bed, where she's lounging with her phone. She's dressed causual with a twist as usual - an oversized grey t-shrit with the words "You Shall Not Pass" emblazoned across the front and swetpants of the same color. As soon as she notices me, an infectious grin spreads across her face
"Xinyu! You are back!" She exclaims, eyes bright. "Did you finally make a friend or are you still on a first name basis with the library?"
"Ha ha. Very funny" I retort sarcastically as I shove my bag on the bed. "But yeah. I guess so"
She immediately sits up, her attention solely on me. "Wait, what? For real?"
I can't help but smile at her enthusiasm. That's the thing about Yooyeon. It's like she has her own respirator of dopamine. Always on her feet. Not a hint of worry in those blue eyes.
"Her name's Sohyun. We met at the café" I answer, keeping my tone casual. One wrong octave and Yooyeon would immediately detect it.
"Ooooh, a café conversation, huh? Sounds like the opening to a great novel" She laughs, flopping back down to her bed. "What did you two talk about?"
I shrug, though I have anticipated the question. "Just espresso and....people"
Yooyeon grins even wider. "Don't tell me you spill your heart out. Cuz that would be really really-"
"It's nothing like that" I quickly interrupt. "It was just small talk. She's really easy to talk to"
"Easy is good. You need easy" Yooyeon bounces off her bed and start rummaging through her cupboard box of numerous books and posters. It has been a week and she still hasn't bothered to arrange her stuffs.
Not a moment sooner, she pulls out two bright blue mugs. "We should celebrate your burgeoning social life. I have got hot chocolate mix somewhere"
I roll my eyes. "You are impossible"
"Impossibly fun" Yooyeon winks as she pours the hot chocolate mix into the mugs and adds some hot water, the steam curling up. "You are on your way to becoming a social butterfly. Next thing you know, you will be hosting literary salons"
"Sure. After I finish this semester's readings" I reply lightly though the idea terrifies me.
Yooyeon hands me the steaming mug with a triumphant grin. "Here's to new friends and the magic of coffee! If you ever need a social coach to take you on this emotional espresso journey, I'm always available"
I take the mug from her, the warmth of it seeping into my palms. "No thanks"
"Aww come on. I can be the Ron to your Harry. Or the Peeta to your Katniss. Wait, nevermind. That's not a good idea" Yooyeon says, never failing to showcase her obsession with fiction. If Sohyun wants to do a thesis on espresso, Yooyeon would probably make one on Hunger Games. But her dream is closer to being a reality, given how she's in media studies.
"Isn't that the guy....who got like brainwashed or something?" I try to recall the memoies of the movie from time immemorial.
"Yeah. Poor Peeta..." Yooyeon says with a dreamy tone before she brings the mug to her lips.
"Fuck! It's hot" She yelps, immediately recoiling and almost spilling the hot drink.
"Who? Peeta?" I ask.
"No. The hot chocolate. Wait, no. I mean yes. Peeta, not this god awful drink" Yooyeon says while she furiously fans her mouth.
I can't help the chuckle that escape my lips. "I have always liked that Gale guy better"
Yooyeon's eyesbrow knit at my remark. And I already know a debate is headed my way.
"For starters,..."
And so it begins. I participate anyway although I know Yooyeon would win in the end as she always does. I'm not geeky enough for this.
But it doesn't matter. Because she's the only friend I have for now. Debating on fictional man not to be the odd one out doesn't seem so bad of a trade.
Would Sohyun like Gale better than Peeta?
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
I'm up early the next morning. The kind of early that makes the world feels like it's still deciding whether or not it should go back to sleep. I look at the bedside clock - 5:55 am. Ha. I beat the alarm today.
Soft gray light shines through a hatch between the curtains, the world outside still enshrouded in the morning mist. All is quiet except for the occasional footsteps and soft snores of Yooyeon , whose face is half buried in the pillow. I smile, knowing she won't be up for at least an hour. The girl's have been up all night finishing an assignment.
I shiver slightly as the cool air grazes my skin when I pull the covers off. The mornings are getting colder, the first hints of autumn sneaking in. And it means I will have a harder time exiting the warm embrace of my sheets.
The chill in the air clings to me as I head towards the common bathroom. The hallways are empty at this time of the day. Not much early risers here. This building, Bradford Hall, is one of the older dorms on the campus. The floors creak with each step I take and the white paint on the wall have faded with age. For no reason, the place indulges a sense of legacy in me. Like I'm a part of something greater. Maybe it's the smell of chamomile that always hangs in the air.
The walk to the bathroom doesn't take long since my room's on the first floor. There's no burden of stairways. It takes five minutes tops for me to clean up - brush my teeth, wash my face and a couple arrangement of my messy hair that will stay the same way after. I still don't understand how some people manage to spend hours in the bathroom. Making yourself presentable shouldn't be that hard.
When I come back to the room, Yooyeon has tossed over, almost draping off the bed and murmuring something that sounds like a spell. She might be visiting middle-earth, Hogwarts and god knows where.
I cross over to my side of the room, the territory determined by an imaginary line Yooyeon have drawn on the first day. The room is barely big enough for two twin beds, a couple desks and a shared closet. My space is plain, simple. Almost empty except for the small lamp and the stack of books. It works fine by me.
Yooyeon's, however, is a total contrast. Her walls are covered with posters of whatever fictional book or movie you cam name. Not to mention the figurines that line her desk. "They give me motivation" Yooyeon has said. In my opinion, I wouldn't want an inch tall Darth Vader monitoring me all night. I bet Yooyeon would consider that 'hot' too.
I rummage through my closet without any initial dress code in mind. There isn't a need to worry. People wouldn't be up yet. There's no one to impress. I decide to go simple pulling on a bright blue sweater over my shirt and pulling on a pair of jeans. I slip on my worn-out sneakers, their familiar creaks greeting me. After a glance in the mirror, I decide to let my loose locks fall freely. I grab my bag and leave, careful not to wake Yooyeon, who's on the brink of falling off the bed.
The campus seems almost unrecognizable at this time of the day - the morning light bathing it in a warm glow that makes everything looks like it belongs to a painting. The air is still, undisturbed by the usual hustle of students. I take a deep breath as I make my way down the brick path.
The clues of autumn are scattered here and there - the air crisp and the leaves tinged with green and yellow like they haven't decided their favorite color yet. To my left, the towering main library roses like a cathedral, fog clinging to its ebony walls. The arched windows reflecting the sun rays.
Further down, the old lecture halls rise up on either sides of the path. They look like relics from the ancient past, a time unbeknownst. The ivy covered walls adding into its timelessness.
They weren't joking about this place being 'old'.
Ahead, the dining hall comes into view, no less younger than its confidants. With the dark wood beams and the high ceiling, it looks almost like a castle. The stone steps leading to the entrance are worn smooth by countless steps and the wooden doors, though thoroughly polished, creaks slightly as I push them open.
Inside, the place is most empty, save for a couple students scattered around. The smell of coffee and pastries fill the air, comforting in a way that makes me want to stay for hours. I grab a tray, throws on a couple of sandwiches and a glass of juice. My morning appetite have never been impressive.
I takes my usual place near one of the stained glass windows, spots of light showering on the table. I love this place. It's quiet and peaceful. Maybe except when Yooyeon's accompanying me.
I'm haflway through a cheese sandwich when the door swing opens.
Sohyun.
She walks in with a group of friends, at least five of them, talking and laughing. Their energy seemingly announcing they belong here.
Sohyun's dressed in almost the same way at our first meeting - a loose white shirt and cargos. And she strides across the hall with the same confidence from that day.
I didn't mean to stare but my eyes follow her, weaving through tables with her friends trailed behind. Like maybe our encounter was an interlude to something more.
I know I should go back to my sandwhich but when the soul craves, the body has to suffice. She turns my way just for a split second and without thinking, I give her a small smile. It's nothing special, really - just a 'Hey. I remember you from yesterday' kind of smile.
But Sohyun's eyes sweep over me as if I'm not even there and soon, she's swept up with her friends again, laughing at something they said.
It stings. Though it has no reason to. It's like a tiny blow that leaves you off-balance but not strong enough to knock you off your feet. Before I even realize it, my lips have pursed into a tight line and I'm already staring down at the unfinished plate of sandwiches. Maybe, yesterday was just a fever dream.
I didn't expect much, really. A nod, a wave, a smile - a sign of acknowledgement. Anything. I tell myself not to care. It's rudiculous to yearn for approval from someone you shared a coffee table with. But I can't help the cold weight settling in my chest.
I glance up at her again. She's still at the counter, taking her sweet time choosing her breakfast. The way she holds herself is so natural, like she belongs anywhere she goes. I envy that about her. I have always been needed to prove to earn a place in society while she just waltz through everything without a care.
Why is it bothering me so much?
Maybe I should be grateful for her brief cameo in my life. Or maybe it would have been better if we never met. Then she will just be another student who comes to eat breakfast. Not Sohyun.
But now, it's infecting me.
I take a sip of my orange juice, focusing on the cold liquid that wash down my throat. It's nothing, I tell myself. It's jst a stupid plea for attention. It doesn't matter. I have always been good at finding meanings in small thing but sometimes, small things are just......small. There's no more meaning to them than what they are.
Maybe that's all this is.
I watch her from the corner of my eyes as she settles down at a table with her friends, her laughter ringing out across the hall again. And for a momet, I almost want to laugh. Not because anything is funny but beacause how easily she moves through the world, through life.
And how easily she has forgotten me.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
Over the next week, autumn have crept in like a quiet exhale. The trees have turned amber and yellow, their leaves falling in slow spiral onto tbe brick paths. The air has become sharp enough to sting my skin when I go out. It's the season of change, like people say. But this year, there's something unsettling about the sudden shift. Like I'm not ready for new beginnings.
Most of my time is spent surrounded by books and notes. Despite the constant pressure, it's nice to finally have a rhythm to life again. The rhythm that my fear of rejection have indulged. I have recovered quick and Sohyun has faded into nothing but another human whose life happen to cross ways with mine.
It's nothing to dwell on.
I sit at my desk, my table lamp casting a faint glow on the pages of 'Jane Eyre'. The word file opened on my laptop is still in the same state as it has been in the last hour - celan and empty. The syllables for the essay due tonight doesn't seem to be manifesting anytime soon.
I tap my fingers idly on the edge of the desk, glancing at the clock. It's nearly midnight now. The campus has gone still save for the ocassional laughter and footsteps of latecomers from the corridor. Peaceful. Quiet. But still not helping me collect my scattered thoughts.
I'm about to give up for the night and go to bed when the door suddenly flies open with a buest of energy and Yooyeon, in all her chaotic glory, stumbles into the room. She's panting, yet she has this wide grin plastered on her face.
I look up from my desk, startled by the sudden enteance. "Hey"
"Hey" she says, plopping down on the bed. "Guess what?"
I raise an eyebrow, bracing myself for whatever dramatic new she has to deliver. "What?"
"Yeonjun wants me to meet him at one of those fancy clubs. And he asked me to bring a friend" She grins even wider. "Guess who that friend's gonna be"
I blink. "Not me"
Yooyeons gives me a look, the kind that says she's not giving up until I give in. "Yes, you. Come on, Xinyu. You have been locked up here for so long. You need to get out"
"I've been studying" It's not enitirely a lie but it's not the truth either.
But Yooyeon's having none of it. "Studying, hiding, same difference. You are coming with me. Plus, it will be fun. Who know? Maybe you will even find a cute boy" She winks, then whispers. "Or a girl"
I'm not quick enough to surpress the blush that creeps up my cheek. "Yooyeon!"
"What? Don't tell me you still can't forget Ms. Espresso"
"This has nothing to do with her" To my surprise, my voice comes out shrill. "I'm just-"
"Blah blah blah. More excuses" Yooyeon cuts me off. "Come on, Xinyu. You will be doing me a huge favour. Yeonjun thinks I have no friends"
"You do have friends"
"Yeah. But no one would be available this late. And I'd rather go with you. You are....less dramatic"
Despite myself, I can't help but chuckle. "You mean 'naive' "
She shrugs, throwing a pillow at me. "You know what I mean. I don't need to worry about you throwing up or passing out or sleeping with the wrong guy"
"You just wants a wingwoman who will behave"
"Exactly" Yooyeon snaps. "So, what do you say? We'll go meet Yeonjun, hangs out for a bit. Then, we can come back to your books if you want"
I glance at my laptop, ths text cursor blinking in and out of existence as if reminding me of the marks soon to be lost. It's tempting to stay here but Yooyeon's right. Perhaps, I can take a breather just this once.
I sigh, pushing my chair back. "Fine. But don't expect me to drag your drunk ass back here"
Yooyeon lets out a triumphant squeal, practically bouncing off the bed. "Yes! You won't regret it"
She's already heading to the door when I throw a sweater over my shoulder. Yooyeon's dressed in her usual fit - jeans and a Lord of the Rings shirt, the one that says "You shalll not pass".
"Seriously? You are wearing that shirt again?" I ask, eyeing her.
Yooyeon shrinks away in mock offense. "Excuse me? Have some respect for the classics. Everybody loves Gandalf"
I roll my eyes. "Whatever. Let's go"
As soon as we step out of the building, we are hit by the cool night air. The campus is fast asleep, the street lamps casting long shadows across the brick paths. It feels peaceful, almost serene.
Yooyeon immediately starts chattering about this new Draco-Harry fiction, her hands waving animatedly as she speaks. I listen, half-distracted, my thoughts finding their way back to a topic unexplored for some times - Sohyun.
Maybe that morning in the dinining hall doesn't mean anything. It's jut a moment, and moments pass.
Despite the countless convincements, a part of me still wonders. What if she had smiled back? What if things have happened differently?
"Earth to Xinyu. Helloooooo" Yooyeon's voice break through my thoughts and I realize she has been talking to me this whole time.
"Sorry" I mumble, recomposing myself. "What were you saying?"
"I said, what do you think of Yeonjun?"
"He seems...nice" I answer, though I barely remember the guy.
Yooyeon grins, clearly pleased. "I know, right? He's the sweetest. And he's really into Harry Potter too, so that's a bonus"
I hum in agreement. Yooyeon's world seems so simple - vibrant, full of energy. Meanwhile, mine feels like the polar opposite. I'm always overthinking, second-guessing.
"Hey" Yooyeon nudges me with her elbow. "You are being all broody again. Stop it. We are going to have fun"
"Yeah, okay" I say, offering her a small smile.
I breath in the autumn air, hoping that mayb, I can stop cllinging onto a loose thread.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
The club is a short walk off campus, tucked into a narrow street line with food trucks and cafés that come alive at night. As me and Yooyeon approach, the distant music grows louder, the rhythmic bass reverberating beneath our feet.
A small line of people snaked out of the entrance, marked by a neon sign displaying its name "The Tavern". The building itself is unassuming, with dark brick walls and small windows dimly lit from the inside.
When we step in, the place opens into a large space with low lighting. The bar run along one side while the rest of the room is a dance floor, dotted with tables around the edge. The air is buzzing with music and energy - people pressed close together, shouting whatever on their mind over the DJ's beat. It's an enitrely different world from the quiet, orderly campus.
"There he is!" Yooyeon yells over the music, wavibg wildly at someone near the bar. I follow her gaze and find a guy leaning against the counter, already grinning like a madman. Yeonjun. I recognize him from the first (and the only) time Yooyeon introduced me. He seems to reflect Yooyeon's restless vigour - a match made in heaven (or Hogwarts, whatever).
"Yeonjun. You remember Xinyu, right?" she says, taking her place next to him. He offers me a smile, not too over the top, but friendly enough. "The one who's always drowning in books?"
I give him an awkward wave. "Hey"
"Nice to meet you again" He says, his voice smooth. "Yooyeon's always talking about you"
"Only good things, I hope"
He laughs. "All good. Don't worry"
Yooyeon reaches for Yeonjun's half-finished shot of whiskey on the counter but get stopped by a firm grip on her wrist.
"Eh eh eh. You are ordering your own drink, miss"
Yooyeon pouts at Yeonjun's remark. "You don't even want to share a drink with your girlfriend?"
"You see. The reason it's called a 'shot' is that it's meant to be savoured by a single individual" Yeonjun's voice has gone unsettlingly serious.
"And they say Xinyu's the smart one" Yooyeon says, punching his arm.
"And they say men are the agressors" Yeonjun retorts. "How do you even deal with this witch, Xinyu?"
Before I can think of anything to say, Yooyeon grabs his arm. "Before I cast a casual Crucio on your sorry ass, we should get to the dance floor"
Yeonjun didn't argue with that. The banter is just their way of communicating. "Xinyu, you should come too" he invites.
"Uh.....no. I'm good. You two go ahead"
"Are you sure?" Yooyeon asks, despite knowing nothing can budge me. "It wil be fun, I promise"
I shake my head, smiling. "I will pass. I think I will just....get a drink"
Yooyeon is silent for a moment, then she's off, dragging Yeonjun into the sea of bodies. I watch them disappear, Yooyeon's laughter echoing back, carefree and loud, like she's exactly where she belongs.
Me, though? Not so much. So, I head to the bar,sliding onto one of the stools and order a Coke. There's no need for anything stronger. I can barely tolerate anything that have the slightest bit of alcohol and that's speaking from experience. The bartender barely looks at me as he hands it over, already moving on to his next order.
I take a sip and glance around. The place is packed, bodies moving in rhythm, couples tangled up in each other and some loners who are just swaying, lost in the music. It's loud, chaotic and I feel totally out of place. It's not that I don't want to have fun - I just don't know how to in place like this. Maybe my definition of 'fun' is different from everyone here.
I lean back against the bar and take another sip. The girls here are all glitter and glamour - tight dresses, high heels and bold colors, shimmering under the disco light. Like the night is made for them.
And then there's me in my oversized sweater and faded jeans. My white sneakers seems an imposter to their sleek heels. I have been so eager to get out of my comfort zone for once that I forget to do the necessary preparations.
I search for Yooyeon's familiar face in the crowd, but she's lost in the restless horde, probably twirling around with Yeonjun. I'm happy for her but all I feel is...detached. It's pathetic. I know. I'm too old not to know my constant fear of being the outsider, of being denied.
I'm halfway through my coke when I feel someone slide into the seat next to me, the barstool creaking under the weight. I didn't look up, hoping that it's just another stranger who comes to mind their own business. But then, he clears his throat, loud enugh for me not to ignore.
"Hey" a voice rings out, smooth but with a cocky edge.
I glanced over and there he is - perfect hair, gleaming jacket and a gold chain around hid neck. I might not be the best at socializing but I recognize the type immediately - the kind that's used to getting everything he wants. I can see it from his look, like he spends too much time in front of the mirror. He gives me a lazy smile, the one that doesn't quite reach his eyes.
"Come here often?" He ask, leaning a bit too close. His cologne is strong and mixed with the sour stench of his breath, it's impossible not to flinch
"No" I say flatly, taking a sip of my coke.
"That's a shame. You should. A pretty girl like you shouldn't be sitting alone"
I bristle at that, the compliment feeling more like an insult. "I'm not really into clubs" I reply, my lazy tone desperately showing my lack of interest.
He either doesn't know or care. Instead, he leans closer, his elbow casually resting on the bar next to me. "You just haven't found the right sort of people. I could show you a good time, you know"
I swallow a sigh, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. "I'm fine, thanks"
But he only smiles wider, as if my rejection is part of a game he's used to playing. "You sure? Cuz I don't see anyone with you here. How about I buy you another drink? Something better than coke"
"No, really. I'm good" I say, more firmly this time, hoping he will get the message. But the bastard won't take his eyes off me.
"You are playing hard to get, huh?" He tilts his head. "You wouldn't believe how many girls like you I have seen. Acting all tough, only to end up in my bed at the end"
That did the job for me. I straighten up in my seat. "Can you just leave me alone?"
"Oh, come one. I'm just-"
"Fuck off, Taeil"
A voice cuts through the tension and I instinctively turn my head toward the source. Sohyun stands a few feet away, arms folded. Her shirt has been tucked into her dark jeans, casual but sharp. Her eyes narrow onto the guy who is now known as Taeil, as if she's used to seeing the scene plays out.
Taeil straighten up, his smile wavering. "Relax. We are just talking"
"No, you are not" Sohyun steps closer, gaze hard and unblinking. "Here's what's gonna happen. You are going to walk away and leave her alone.
Taeil's smirk returns but it's not so sure as before. "And what exactly are you going to do if I don't?"
Sohyun's lips curve into a smile, one colder than any I have seen from her. She pulls out her phone, holding it up for him to see. "Let's see. I don't think your parents will be so happy to see their son acting like a druggie. Plus, it wouldn't be good for either you or your parents if the video end up in the wrong hands"
All the color drain out if Taeil's face, leaving him gaping. "You are blaffing" He protests, though the panic is clear as day in his voice.
"You know I'm not" Sohyun smiles like a predator who has cornered its prey. "So, fuck off"
For a moment, there's silence, the music filling in the temporary gap. Taeil shifts on his feet, his confidence all gone and finally, he lets out a sharp breath. "Fine. Whatever" His eyes flash with fury. "But this isn't over yet"
Sohyun gives him a mock wave, wriggling her fingers as he strides out of the club.
I exhale, realizing I have been holding my breath. I look over at Sohyun, who's still standing there with her phne. A neutral look has returned to her face. Like the Sohyun just a moment ago was a totally different person.
"You ok?" She asks, sliding her phone back into her pocket.
"I - yeah. Thanks" I reply, still a little stunned.
She shrugs, giving me a small smile, genuine this time. "That guy's a creep"
I nod, processing everything that has happend in the last few minutes. Sohyun, the psychologist. Sohyun, the saviour. What isn't she?
She pulls up the stool next to mine, the one Taeil has occupied just a moment ago and settles in. I shift slightly, suddenly hyperaware of her presence, of how close she is. The bar light cast little shadows on her face, illluminating the little details on her face I haven't noticed before. The tiny mole on her nose catches the light first, then the one under her left eye. They are so small, barely there but they stand out now that I'm seeing her up close.
"First time here?" She asks. How she knows, I have no idea. Maybe it's my my clothes that give it away.
"Yeah" I admits, a little sheepishly. "It's not really my kind of place"
Sohyun raises an eyebrow, amused but not surprised. "Yeah, I figured. You don't exactly look like you are having the time of your life"
I let out a small laugh. "Is it that obvious?"
She smirks, her eyes flickering over to my outfit. "Just a little"
I glance down, fidgeting with the edge of my sweater, suddenly even more aware of my appearance. "It's not really.....I don't usually go to places like this"
"So, not a party person?" Sohyun's voice is more curious than judegemental.
"Not really" I admit. "I'm more of a...stay-in and read type"
Her smile grows and for a moment, the chaotic sounds of the club faded as if we are alone. "Well, you are here now. So might as well try to enjoy it"
She's so easygoing, so at ease with herself it makes me want to throw caution to the wind too. But then, I remembered that morning in the dining hall and my stomach twists. The memory is still nagging at the back of my mind. I bite my lower lip, debating whether or not I should bring up the subject.
Sohyun takes a sip from my nearly empty can of coke and before I can stop myself, the words spill out. "I saw you the other morning. At the dining hall"
Her eyebrows knit together in curiousity. "Oh?"
"I smiled at you" I say. "But you didn't see me"
Or act like you don't, I thought.
Her eyes widen for a moment before she speaks."Wait, really? Xinyu, I'm sorry. I didn't see you"
I blink. "You didn't?"
She shakes her head. "I swear. If I'd seen you, I would have smiled back. I promise. I guess I was just in my own head then. I'm sorry"
Her words are soft, delicate and sincere. It unravels the knot in my stomach I have pretended to be non-existent. Still, she could be lying but I decide to trust her,realizing how much I care about what she thinks of me.
I galnce away, feeling my cheeks heat up slightly. "It's okay" I mumble, sipping from the empty can of coke. "I just thought....maybe I'd misread things"
Sohyun gives me a small, warm smile. "You didn't misread anything. I'm sorry if you feel like that"
She's apologizing too much now it's starting to get uncomfortable. So I dismiss it with a nod.
Sohyun shifts in her seat, her eyes flickering down to my sweater, which have bunched up awkwardly from the way I have been sitting. Before I can fix it myself, she reaches over. Her finges gently tug at the hem of my sweater, smoothing it down without a second thought.
"There" she says, her hand lingering a moment longer more before she pulls it back.
I'm still processing the gesture when almost absentmindedly, she reaches out and brush a stray strand of my hair out of my eyes. Her fingertips skim the side of my face and for a moment, time slows down - just enough for me to notice the way her eyes soften.
"There you go" she says, leaning back. "Now you are perfectly suited for the night life"
We both smile at that and for a heartbeat, I swear I can feel something shift between us. Something I can't quite name. Something that might as well be a misinterpreted signal.
The air settles into a quiet lull, the ghost of her fingers still tingling on my skin. The warmth of the moment hangs awkwardly between us and for a moment, all I can do is sit there, actuely aware of the silent between us.
"So..." I clear my throat. "Do you come here alone too?"
The corner of her mouth quriks up like she finds my question amusing. "Alone?" she repeats. "No. Not really. I'm here with my friends most of the time"
I nod. "So, are they here tonight?"
She glances towards the dance floor. "Yeah. They are somewhere out there" she says with a small laugh. "I kinda slipped away for a bit. Needed a break"
A break. From what, though? The noise? The people? The club?
I hesistate for a second. "Not really your scene either?"
She gives me a sideway glance. "It's fun but...sometimes, I don't know. It can geta little old. Same people, same music"
"Yeah" I agree. "I get that"
She taps her fingers against the bar, thoughtful for a moment. "What about you? Do you come here yourself or did Yooyeon drag you here?"
My eyes widen. "You know Yooyeon?"
Sohyun chuckles softly. "We are friends on instagram. She followed me first, I think? She seems fun"
I can't help but laugh at that. "Yeah. She's definitely fun"
Sohyun tilts her head, as if searching for Yooyeon in the crowd. "She told me she's your roommate when I mentioned I see you in one of her stories. She's been hyping you up"
"She -what?" I stare at her, feeling the panic rising in my chest. "Hyping me up?"
Sohyun greans, leaning in just close enough for me to catch a faint scent of her perfume. "Yeah. She says you are a lot cooler than you let on"
I shake my head, laughing under my breath. "That's Yooyeon....being Yooyeon"
"Well, she's not wrong" Sohyun adds, her eyes catching mine for a split second before she goes back to staring at the dance floor.
The silence settles in again, like an early intermission. Sohyun's eyes flicker back to me and I try to ignore the way she's watching me like she's considering something. I sip at the can of Coke that has been emptied long since.
"Do you wanna get out of here?" She asks so casually, like it's something she asks anyone alone in a night like this.
"What?" I ask, unsure if I've heard it right over the loud music.
She lets out an exasperated sigh. "It's too loud. And hot. Let's do something fun"
I hesistate, unknowingly squeezing the coke can flat. "Like what?"
Sohyun gives me a small smile, laced with certainity and mischeif. "Trust me. You will like it"
There's something in her voice that disarms me. Perhaps it's because this night has already been so surreal, with Yooyeon dragging me here, the drinks, the noise and then Taeil's annoying persistence. And now, Sohyun, who had seemingly ignored me is suddenly offering to whisk me away. It feels like too much, and yet, somehow, not enough.
I find myself nodding faster than my brain can catch up. "Okay"
Sohyun stands, sliding a couple bills on the counter before I can protest. She doesn't say anything, just gestures towards the door, and I follow her out of the club.
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The air outside is sharp and cold and for once I'm grateful for my out of place sweater. Sohyun, however, doesn't seem to be fazed. If not, she seems to be enjoying it.
The music fades into the distant as we walk in silence, winding through the quieter streets near the campus. I don't ask where we are going and she doesn't offer an explanation. Instead, we fall into step beside each other, our shoulders brushing ocassionally. My pulse is still racing, though I don't know if it's from the club or from the cold.
Sohyun's pace is unhurried, her hands stuffed into the pockets of her jeans and I keep my arms wrapped around myself, pulling my sweater tight. After a while, we reach one of the taller campus buildings, its ivy covered walls bathed in the moonlight. During the day, these buildings always looks heavy, weighted down by unknown legacies. But under the silvery gloom of night, it has all been replaced by a strange sort of calm.
"Come" Sohyun gestures towards the side door as she leads me in. The hallway is dim, lit only by the low, humming lights overhead. She doesn't say a word as she climbs up the stairs, up and up until we reach the top floor. I'm breathless by the time we come to a stop in front of an old, rusted door, with a faded sign that reads Roof Access: Authorized Personnel Only.
Sohyun gives me a quick wink as she pushed open the door with a soft creak. "Not like anyone ever come here" She mutters to herself as she steps out into the night.
I follow her onto the roof, and for a moment, I'm stunned. The sky stretches out above us, a blanket of stars scattered across the black canvas of night. The city lights flicker below and I can still hear the distant sound of traffic but for the most part, it's quiet. Like the rooftop itself is another world within this world. The wind tugs at my sweater and I pull it even tighter around me, bracing against the sudden rush of cold.
Sohyun is already sitting at the edge of the roof, her legs dangling over the side, her gaze fixed on the stars. She pats the spot next to her and I sit, careful to keep a distance between us.
I tilt my head up, admiring the stars, feeling the enormity of the night settling down on me. "You come here often?"
"Yeah" Sohyun says, her voice soft. "Whenever I need to think. Or when I just need a breather"
I nod, unsure what to say. This isn't what I expected when she said something fun. But in a way, it's better.
We sit in silent for a moment, the only sounds the wind and the distant hum of the city below. This calm, it's peaceful and stirring at the same time. As if there's a deeper meaning to it that I can't quite grasp.
"It's funny" she says. "Back in the country, I used to lie out in the fields and just....watch the stars. Sometimes, I would stare at them for hours. It never fails to soothe me"
I watch the way her eyes trace the sky as if she's searching for something. To be honest, I have expected someone like her to be from a big city. An image of her anywhere else is unimaginable.
"Must've been nice" I murmur. "Being able to see them so clearly"
She nods. "Yeah. It's not the same here. The city kinda takes over. Light pollution and all"
I can hear the nostalgia in her voice and for a moment, I imagine her as a little girl lying under that wide country sky, her face lit by starlight. There's something tender about it, something that makes me want to reach for a fragment of her from a different time.
After a pause, I point up at the sky. "Well, we've got stars here too. Not as bright, but they are still there"
Sohyun tilts her head, following where I'm pointing and I can't help but smile a little. "Okay, bear with my nerdiness for a second"
She chuckles. "Go for it"
I lift my hand, tracing an invisible line through the air. "That's Orion. See the three stars right there, in a row? That's his belt"
Sohyun squints, trying to follow. "Oh, I think I see it"
"Orion was a hunter" my voice dropping slightly as I tell the story. "A really good one too. Some says he fell in love with the goddess Artemis but her brother, Apollo, wasn't too happy about it so he tricked Artemis into killing Orion" I pause. "She realized her mistake too late and heartbroken, she placed him among the stars so she can always see him"
The story hangs in the air when I finish. I glance at Sohyun, her face bathed in a soft glow. She's quiet for a moment, her expression thoughtful.
"That's kind of sad" she says quietly.
"Yeah" I whisper. "It is"
I shift slightly, turning to face her and she does the same. Our eyes meet and for a moment, the world stills. I notice the way her hair flatters with the breeze, the city lights reflected in her eyes and the faint smile tug at her lips.
"You are really something, you know that?" she says, her voice low. "Is this your revenge for my espresso lecture?"
I blink, then smiles, feeling the tension melt away. "Maybe" I say, my voice almost teasing. "But instead of coffee, I use tragic mythological hunters"
Sohyun tilts her head, her smile widening. "Touché. You really know how to open-up someone"
"It's a natural talent" I shrug, although my sarcastic tone gives away the bluff.
"So, this is how you get back at people?" She continues, her voice still teasing. "By making them feel guilty for their ignorance about constellations"
I laugh, rolling my eyes. "Please, you are not the first person to endure my mythology rants. Consider yourself lucky it wasn't longer"
"And I thought my espresso thesis was bad enough"
It's like we are back in the café except that now, I'm the one doing most of the talking. But we are still the same two people with their own crazy obsessions.
Then in the lightest of gestures, Sohyun reaches out. Her fingers find the sleeve of my sweater, gently tugging at the cuff, as though fixing it, like she did earlier. She looks at me, eyes warm and amused.
"Revenge or not" she says, letting her hand fall back to her side. "I think I like your stories"
I swallow, trying not to lose my footing in the closeness of the moment. "Well" I managed to say, my voice uneven. "Next time, I will make sure to pick a happier story"
Sohyun chuckles, leaning back, although her eyes never leave me. "I will hold you to that"
The air around us suddenly become charged with something unspoken. There's a quiet, almost reverent pause in the conversation as if neither of us wants to break whatever delicate thread is holding this moment together.
Sohyun shifts slightly, inching just the slightest to my side. The stars seem to burn brighter, and I find myself leaning into the silence, into the space between us that feels both heavy and light at the same time.
"Do you ever feel like....." Sohyun starts, her voice quiet, like she's speaking into the night as much as to me. "Like everything around you is waiting for something to happen?"
I blink, her words sinking into the stillness. "What do you mean?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
Her gaze flickers back to the stars. "Like....right now, for instance" Her eyes meet mine again, and there's something in her expression, like she's trying to find the right words. "It's like we are on the edge of something"
Her words send a shiver through me, not from the cold but the hidden meaning underneath. It's not an unfamiliar feeling, but it's one I've been pushing aside ever since we met. The strange pull towards her, a quiet fascination that has grown into something else entirely, something that's so wrong and so right at once.
I glance at her and find myself staring at the mole under her left eye, like I'm seeing her for the first time.
"I know what you mean" I finally say, my voice almost too quiet like I'm afraid to break this fragile peace between us. My hands tighten around the railing and I glance down for a moment, trying to gather my thoughts. "It's like.....something have changed"
She moves an inch more closer, the space between us nearly non-existent now. I wonder if she can hear my heartbeat now. My breath catch in my throat as she leans in, enough to cover the remaining space distancing us.
"You are right" she says softly. "Something has changed"
It's so quiet, her voice almost swallowed by the night. MY gaze flickers to her lips for a second - a brief unintentional moment that I quickly pull back from. But I wasn't quick enough.
Sohyun notices. I can see it in her way her expression shifts. And she knows that I know that she knows. Her hand, resting casually on the railing, moves slightly, her fingers brushing against mine in the lightest of touches. It's barely a graze but it's enough to send electricity tingling through my nerves.
The moment stretches, suspended between us, as if we're waiting for something to happen or maybe just waiting for one of us to make a move. The tension is palpable now, not uncomfortable, but thick, charged with possibility.
I can't tell who moves first, or if we even move at all. It's like an invisible force has suddenly drawn us together. Her face is so close now, I can see the way my breath mingles with hers in the cool night air.
Then slowly - so slowly it feels like the world is holding its breath - Sohyun lifts her hand. She reaches out, her fingers brushing against my sweater, smoothing a wrinkle near my shoulder like she did the last two times. But this time, it's different. There's an unspoken intentionality to it that makes my breath quickens.
Her hand lingers, tracing the fabric for a moment longer than necessary. And then, without breaking eye contact, she lifts her other hand, gently tucking a strand of stray hair way from my face and tucking it behind my ear. The tender touch send a warmth through me.
Suddenly, everything feels sharper, more vivid - the sound of the wind, the soft glow of the city lights, the way her fingers linger near my cheek, as if she's waiting for my permission to go further.
"Sohyun..." I whisper, not even sure what I'm trying to say, but needing to say something, anything, to break the tension between us.
But she doesn't move. She just watches me, her eyes searching mine, her hand still resting gently on my cheek. "Is this okay?" she asks as if it's a secret we only know.
I nod, not trusting myself to speak without stuttering, unable to think of anything but the way her breath feels against my skin.
And then so so slowly, it feels like time has stopped, she leans in.
Her lips brush against mine in the lightest of touches, barely a kiss at all, more like a promise, like she's testing the waters, waiting for me to pull away, to tell her to stop.
But I don't. I won't.
Because in that moment, everything have ceased to exist - the city, the stars, the quiet night around us. All that's left is the warmth of her lips, the way they press against mine, gentle but certain.
I kiss her back, just as softly, just as tentatively. And for a moment, it feels like my life has reached its epitome.
Sohyun's hand, resting near my cheek, slides down to cup my jaw, her fingers warm against my skin. She tilts her head slightly, pressing her lips more firmly against mine, and I feel a soft sigh escape me before I could stop it.
My hands, awkward at first, find their way to her waist. I hold her there, not too tight, but enough to feel the warmth of her body through the thin fabric. She responds by pulling me closer, her fingers slipping into my hair, tugging me gently, deepening the kiss.
Her hands move from my jaw, sliding down my neck, her fingers grazing the sensitive skin there. My heart is pounding louder than the wind around us, around the city below. The kiss becomes more insistent, more desperate, as if we are trying to say something through it, something words can't describe.
Sohyun's lips parts with mine and for a moment, I think she's finally pulling away. But instead, she moves closer, her breath ghosting against my jawline. A soft shiver runs through me when I feel the first press of her lips against my neck, light and teasing.
Her mouth moves slowly, gently exploring, like she's savoring the taste of my skin. Her lips trail down the side of my neck, and when she presses a firmer kiss jut below my ear, I can't stop the quiet gasp that betrays my lips.
Sohyun hears it. Of course, she does. And I feel her smile against my skin.
"You are so sensitive here, Xinyu" she whipsers before her lips continue their path lower, her hands finding the back of my neck.
When she presses an open-mouthed kiss to the curve of my neck, her tongue barley flicking against my skin, I feel my whole body tense with the intensity of it. My hands tighten around her waist, pulling her even closer, yearning for more.
"Sohyun..." I whisper, barely recognizing my own voice and her response is to kiss me harder, her lips hot against the sensitive skin of my neck.
The world won't stop spinning, I reduced to nothing but the sensation of her mouth, the warmth of her body against mine and the quiet, breathless sounds that fill the space between us. It's overwhelming and yet, I can't imagine it stopping anytime soon.
When it finally does, I can still feel the ghost of her lips lingering on my skin. I feel her breath, close to my neck for a second longer before she pulls back. The cool night air rushes in where her lips had been, but the heat she left behind stays, radiating beneath my skin.
I open my eyes, barely realizing I have closed them and glance at her. Sohyun doesn't say a word. She just leans in, her dark locks scattering as she rests her head on my shoulder. Her gaze is fixed on the stars, unblinking as if she's trying to imprint them to memory.
But then, without looking away, she lets out a quiet breath and says, so softly I almost miss it.
"Fucking Apollo"
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