#i love how the first three words had multiple options so i focused solely on unposted works and ended up with three franziska-centric wips

[ziskandra]

Find the Words

Search your works for the given words and post the context of what you find! My given words (from @mxkelsifer) were danger, follow, color and decline.

DANGER

Trucy inched closer to the door, pushing on it gently so she could see more of the kitchen. She could see Daddy then, staring more into the depths of his own cup of coffee than the woman sitting across from him.

“So you’re still staying in contact with the legal community,” the woman asked, and Trucy noticed how the woman’s posture relaxed as she said that, how the grip on her mug was a lot less tight than it had been previously. “Does that mean you be contesting the Bar Association’s decision?” It was Daddy that tensed this time, Trucy noticed. “I don’t have any intention of doing so.” The woman’s face clouded dangerously, and Trucy was sure if she had that whip in her hands, Daddy would be feeling it across his face. The thought made Trucy swell in anger, but she did not run into the kitchen just yet--she wanted to see Daddy take care of himself, now that he wasn’t in immediate danger. “You’re a fool, Phoenix Wright,” the woman snapped. “You come so far, almost defeating me in the process, and you’re telling me that you intend on hiding away like a coward? The media paints you as a hero who can work miracles, but at the end of the day, you can’t even help yourself? You can’t even help the little girl that’s in your care? You disgust me. You’d let one tiny foolish incident stand in your way… clearly, I’d misinterpreted your dedication to the job—”

FOLLOW

While little brother claims he returned to America after his year of epiphany to help me, I cannot help but think that he wanted to help Phoenix Wright instead. I am Franziska von Karma, and I do not need Miles Edgeworth’s help. Those tears I might have shed before my own return to Europe were caused by the stress of not being able to prosecute, nothing more.

So, naturally, when Miles announced his return to the States without even once mentioning it before, I could not help but think that perhaps that Phoenix Wright was involved again. But Phoenix Wright is no longer a practicing attorney, so why would Miles need to help him now?

After two months, when Miles did not return to Europe like I’d anticipated, I decided to follow him back to America. Well, not entirely. I never follow. The cases here in Germany had simply grown stale, and although I despise America and its culture (or, what culture it pretends to have), I cannot deny that whenever I was there, I felt different. Challenged. Alive.

COLOR

Franziska's heart jumped, and it was all she could do to not squirm awkwardly under her sister's continued scrutiny. She'd been feeling out-of-sorts all day, but Lisbeth had done nothing but her best to be inclusive.

Alexander got to his feet, standing just behind his wife’s chair. “Go ahead. Open it.”

Franziska’s fidgety fingers finally made a dedicated attempt at opening the present; colourful paper fell away until only a box remained. After looking up at Alexander's encouraging smile, she continued, opening the lid of her present; it was a very pretty broach, the same color as her eyes. She'd once had one of a similar shade but different shape, but had lost it during a challenging crime scene investigation. Of course, Franziska herself had surmounted the challenge, but her broach had not.

Although it did not match, Franziska affixed the broach to the front of her dress. After some scrutiny, she decided that it would go well with her usual court attire. “You're family,” Lisbeth repeated and it was only once Franziska looked up again that she was taken aback by the warmth of Lisbeth's smile. Von Karmas were not nurturing, but it seemed that the years had affected Franziska's sister; Lisbeth was truly a Paffenholz now. Suddenly awkward for a reason she could not quite decipher, Franziska averted her gaze as she let the feeling rush through her.

Maybe Christmas wasn't so bad after all.

DECLINE

They’re careful in public, of course. Oh, Meredith might still manhandle him with wild abandon, grasping at fistfuls of robes when he particularly draws her ire, but it’s only when they’re in the safety of their own quarters that she brings her mouth crashing down against his, pinning him against the wall with one forearm, knee pressed up against his groin. She’ll kiss him hard enough to bruise, to break the skin if she’s not careful, and she rarely is. Meredith is the Knight-Commander, and this is the only space she has to let go, to be with one of the only people in the whole damn city who’s not scared by her, not even a little bit, and if that’s what she needs, then Orsino is happy to provide, because Maker knows, he needs it too.

With every other templar, Orsino knows he needs to watch his back. Even those who have never personally witnessed a mage turn into an abomination (a number that is rapidly declining in the disaster zone that is known as the city of Kirkwall) watch the mages with suspicious eyes, fingers twitching at any whiff of forbidden magic. And even though he knows it’s Meredith who’s at least nurtured, if not planted, these misconceptions in the minds of those under her command, the fear of an untimely death is the furthest thing from his mind when they’re alone together like this. If she actually wanted to kill him, she’s had plenty of chances already. But he knows, just as she does, that she needs him, just as much as he needs her. If somebody were to replace her, he’d have to learn a whole new playbook, and there’s no guarantee that he’ll be able to work together this … intimately with the next Knight-Commander. And there was always the chance that they could be worse.

Tagging: @genedar, @musashi, @squadron-of-damned, @princefado, @jake-marshall and anybody else who'd like to do this one! Your words are: roast, love, shade & inclination!

[mooshys]

the silver lining of bad first dates

summary: a date gone wrong. a walk in the rain. a simple conversation in a ramen shop. mundane slice of life and mutual pining with kuroo.

word count: 2.1k

author’s note and warnings: curse words galore. set in time-skip. pure word vomit. kuroo’s one of those characters that I’m so scared to even consider writing for because I feel as though I’ll never truly be able to “get” his character. whatever though, I tried.

This date fucking sucked.

Point-blank. No sugarcoating because the dude sitting on the opposite side of the dinner table was more interested in the JASDAQ than your name. Seriously, he couldn’t even be bothered to listen to you talk about your alma mater before he swooped in and started blanketing his insecurities with his recent Bitcoin investment. 

Talk about lame.

Wine and hors d’oeuvres be damned, you were making an escape before he started mansplaining the economy. Even wagyu couldn’t save this candlelit disaster.

Making no attempt to be discreet, you whipped your phone out of your bag and typed up a quick text:

Mind picking me up? Shitty date.

Ping! 

Seriously? Again? What’d this guy do this time?

Ping!

Send the address

Ping!

I swear, this is the last time I’m picking you up

You smiled at the screen, thumbs moving fast.

That’s what you said last week

A bubble with three dots appeared, disappeared, and reappeared.

Ping!

Five minutes.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Like every cliché bad first date, the weather made sure to mimic the mood. The rainfall was nothing less than dreadful, a downpour that left the streets empty as most people kept indoors to avoid getting soaked.

“You’re so lucky that I didn’t have to work overtime tonight,” Kuroo began, standing close to you in an attempt to shield you both from the shower with his janky umbrella. “Otherwise, you’d be walking in the rain or sitting there having your dinner ruined from hearing that guy talk about his gains in the market.”

You laughed at the truth of his words. There really was no one else who knew you like Kuroo. 

“And you know I would’ve walked in the rain out of the two options. I can’t believe someone so dick-ish exists that I’d bail out on a free meal,” you said, raising your voice over the heavy pelting.

Without any warning, a trio of college kids rushed past you two, not paying attention to the other pedestrians walking the sidewalks as their only priority in mind was making it back home before catching a cold. They had their backpacks held up to cover their heads, but it wasn’t much help as their clothes were completely soaked.

“See that?” Kuroo jabbed a thumb over his shoulder. “You would’ve been running like those kids all the way back to your apartment if I didn’t show up.”

You lightly elbowed him and rolled your eyes. Rain fell on your shoulder from the sudden movement, but Kuroo repositioned the umbrella to prevent you from getting wet. “As if,” you murmured, hugging your body in an attempt to keep warm. “Thanks for picking me up. Again.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re oh so welcome,” he waved off your words and then cackled when you narrowed your eyes at him. Sometimes he really knew how to push your buttons. “Anyway, are you trying to date a bunch of crappy guys on purpose? Because I feel like that’s what you’re trying to do.”

“It’s not like I ask to go through a bunch of crappy first dates!” you said, letting out a huff of hot air. The past month had been riddled with unsuccessful first dates. Statistically speaking, you were an outlier; the average person probably went through a handful of bad first dates in a single year: you went through that number in a mere month. Multiple standard deviations past, you were way out of the norm. “Maybe I’m just a magnet for awful guys who only have a thing for themselves.”

Kuroo scoffed. “Or maybe you just like to make my life a little bit harder.”

You smiled at his words.

“Maybe.”

Besides the realization that you were like a honeytrap to flies when it came to bad first dates, another constant came from the start of it all: Kuroo. You weren’t expecting much from the first SOS call; really, just someone to walk you back home when it was late and the taxi fares were jacked up. But you would never forget the first time he waited for you outside that overhyped bar with a bag of take-out, his tie loosened and hair messy because he had just left the office and rushed to the nearest place that sold yakisoba for a decent price.

Maybe you did make his life a little bit harder. It was selfish, but whenever you had a bad date, you actually started to anticipate your escape because that meant Kuroo would be there for you.

He was your silver lining for the past month.

Red brick walls came into view once you two rounded the corner into a more secluded alley, revealing a familiar site that made you hungry. A neon sign which turned brighter due to the haze of the rain drew you in like a moth to a flame. It flickered, but still kept its light. Another constant.

Underneath the awning of the restaurant, Kuroo retracted his umbrella and shook the excess water off of it. He shoved it in the small bin filled with umbrellas belonging to the other patrons and dragged the soles of his shoes on the mat before pulling the door open. 

“Let’s just get some ramen,” he said, ushering you inside. You took the first steps and situated yourself at a lone table. He followed and a waitress quickly took your orders, soon rushing back to the kitchen to help with the line of tickets pinned to the wall. 

“Ramen on a rainy day,” you said, giving a low whistle. “You know your stuff.”

“Duh, ramen tastes best when you’re freezing,” he replied, pulling on his necktie to loosen it. He grabbed two pairs of chopsticks along with a pair of spoons, placing a set in front of you. “And it tastes pretty good after bad dates too.”

“You’re talking to the queen of bad first dates.”

“Oh, I’ve had my fair share too, Your Highness.”

As if on cue, two bowls of ramen were brought over from the kitchen along with an extra soft boiled egg as soon as he finished his sentence. The soup had small ringlets floating at the top from the fat of the broth along with bright green scallions acting as a garnish to offer a vibrant and appetizing color. Wasting no time, you both gave thanks and started to dig in.

“You know,” he started, breaking his chopsticks apart and dipping them into the broth. He pulled up a nice amount of noodles, the steam rising up higher than before. “I really think you should quit dating guys who suck.”

Following Kuroo, you did the same and blew at your noodles. “You say it like it’s easy.”

“It is. It’s so easy.” He ate a mouthful and swallowed before speaking again. “You have your top tier guys, your average guys, and then your totally shitty guys. I mean absolute trash—these are the guys you’re dating. Avoid them and all your problems will be solved.”

“Ugh, I feel like we go through this conversation after every single mishap of a date.”

Translation: Kuroo, you sound like my nagging mother.

“Because you never learn.”

Translation: I will nag at you all I want.

You sighed. “Love’s a lot more complicated than you make it.”

“Whatever. Just find a guy who isn’t an asswipe, and then we can talk.”

As you two continued to eat, the kitchen staff remained lively. The sounds of ceramic bowls clattering together along with the static hum of an old radio buzzing some city pop tune your mom would have listened to in her youth acted as background noise while chatting. 

“So... what kind of guy do you think you are?” you asked, curious to hear his answer. Kuroo was in the middle of slurping his noodles and held a hand up to signal you to give him a second.

“Me?” He pointed at himself and you nodded. Who else would you be asking? “I’m your average guy.”

You frowned. “No way.”

“What, you think I’m an absolute trash kind of guy? Harsh.”

“No, I think you’re definitely top tier. Average guys don’t go out of their way to do stuff like this.”

Kuroo raised a brow at you and set his chopsticks down. His bowl was half finished, but he was more interested in what you had to say. “Stuff like what?”

“You know,” you motioned the space between you two, “doing this awful-first-date-rescue-at-the-drop-of-a-hat kind of stuff. No questions asked. Average guys don’t do that. Average guys just pay for your meal and maybe give you their jacket when it’s kind of cold. And sometimes they call you some gross pet name like...” You shivered at the thought. “Kitten or something.”

He looked slightly taken aback. “You don’t like being called kitten?”

“No, something about it sounds gross.”

“That’s just because you haven’t found the right guy to say it to you when—“

Not wanting to hear the rest of what he had to say, you quickly crumpled up a napkin into a ball and tossed it at him. He threw his head back, putting on an act as if you actually did any damage to him.

“Stop. Please. Enough. Don’t even finish what you’re going to say.” You went back to devouring your bowl, the noodles more soft than before. Still tasted great as you shoveled in mouthfuls. “I don’t wanf tew heur et!”

Sporting a disgusted look, Kuroo grabbed a few napkins from the dispenser and slid them to your side of the table. “Jeez, you eat like that whenever you’re on a date? Maybe I saved that guy from you.”

“Well, you’re the one stuck with all of this now,” you motioned a hand to your entirety and wiggled an eyebrow. “Consider yourself lucky.”

He held his chin in the palm of his hand and stared at you from across the table, eyes still holding a glint of amusement under the low lighting of the restaurant. His bowl was nearly finished, yet he focused his attention on you, allowing a small smile to grace his lips as he pondered your words.

You eyed him, his gaze feeling a bit different from before. “What are you doing?”

“Considering,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“...It shouldn’t take you that long to,” you mumbled and ate another mouthful of noodles. He kept at it and soon started to crack up. When you narrowed your eyes at him, he shook his head and pushed another pile of napkins your way. 

“There’s a scallion at the corner of your lips,” he tapped a hand on his bottom lip and cackled when you rushed to grab a napkin and wipe it away. Heat rose to your face and you sucked on your teeth.

“You know what? Forget about me calling you a top tier guy. It never happened.”

He placed a hand over his heart, wounded by your words. “It was kitten, wasn’t it?”

Unable to contain yourself, you laughed into your hand, shoulders shaking. You had to set your chopsticks down as you fanned your face, trying to get rid of the tears threatening to spill from the corner of your eyes. “If I ever heard that from another guy, I would walk out. The second the word came out of his mouth, I would pack up my things, leave, and never look back.”

“But you’re not right now.”

“I’m not.”

“Because I’m a top tier guy. Admit it.”

Because it’s you.

You shook your head and waved the white flag. “Right, that’s exactly it.”

Kuroo crossed his arms in front of his chest, satisfied with your answer. Like he won something from this conversation. He liked the way your lips tugged into a smile, not too tight, but enough to showcase the apples of your cheeks; he liked these nights when he could unwind after a long day of work and laugh about stupid pet names; he loved how easy it all was. 

Consideration done and over with, he went back to finish his bowl, the steam from the broth no longer visible to the naked eye.

“Eat up or it’ll get cold,” he said and sipped on the broth. It was still warm, much to his surprise. “I’ll walk you back home when we’re done.”

You took small bites, prolonging the meal in any way possible: listening to him talk about his lazy cubicle partner, ordering another side of gyoza, folding a napkin to tell him his fortune through grade school methods. Both your bowls were empty, pushed to the side with a sliver of broth left as the focus was neither the food nor the JASDAQ jerk from hours before, but rather mundane conversation that went in circles until the shop emptied out.

A hundred dates could go wrong only for Kuroo to show up and make things right.

Maybe it was time for him to become more than a silver lining.

[asktensei]

Previously on Tensei’s Birthday Bash:

“Love,” I tug your sleeve, “Is the option of going out still open?”

“Tensei, it’s almost midnight - we can’t go out now,” you retorted.

“I have a sudden urge to go to the beach,” I say, looking out of the window, “The sky looks amazing, doesn’t it?”

“I have to go to work tomorrow, honey,” you say, cupping my cheeks.

“Please, love… for me?”

.

.

.

You turned to face Tensei. You felt his grip on you tighten as you pressed your hands against his soft cheeks. You smiled, seeing him close his eyes and savour the small act.

How could you say no to him? Every single thing he does makes your heart leap. Even by just melting into your touch, all of your rationality is thrown out of the window - just to make this male’s wishes come true.

“You better make me breakfast tomorrow,” you whisper, trying to not break the tension you both built in this small haven.

“Come on, Y/N - it’s my birthday tomorrow! I’ll cook the day after.”

“I don’t care if it’s your birthday, you’re making me breakfast tomorrow,” you got off the bed and went to get your bag.

Once you got your bag, you turned to face Tensei.

God, this man is a literal baby.

“Fine, I’ll make breakfast tomorrow.”

.

.

.

You helped Tensei into his wheelchair and then proceeded to walk beside him, heading to the beach. You enjoyed the soft light hitting your skin, closing your eyes as you gripped the back of Tensei’s seat. A small hum left your lips as you took in the crisp, cold air of the night.

“I told you this was a good idea,” he said, a smug look painted on his face.

You looked at the dark-haired male, annoyed.

“I have work tomorrow, Tensei - I’m scared I might oversleep,” you say, sighing, “...but I do miss the beach.”

“It’s been a long time since we went to our little oasis, hasn’t it?” he said, happiness laced in his voice, “We made a lot of memories there, you and I.”

You smiled, reminiscing all the moments you’ve shared with the former Pro-Hero.

“Do you remember when you tried to burn that ice cream I was eating with your quirk?” you said, laughing, “I remember how disgusted you were when the cream actually entered your engines.”

He tried wiping the cream off of the metal piece but resorted to asking you since he couldn’t clean it properly.

“You remember when a crab pinched your cheeks?” He said, holding back his laughter, “You cried so hard.”

“You can only joke about that when you actually feel the strength of a crab with its claws,” you retort, annoyed by his actions.

“Hey, hey - Wasn’t I the one calming you down?”

He was. He ran to a shop nearby and got an ice pack to cool down your cheek. He sat beside you, rubbing your back as you cried due to the immense pain. He kissed you on your forehead in hopes of calming you down.

“You were - you always have been by my side, Tensei,” You say, ruffling his hair.

“Don’t plan on changing that anytime soon,” he replied, pulling on your sleeve.

You faced the male beside you and instantly you were in awe. The blue tone of the sky had perfectly painted itself onto him, the cool tones brightening his cerulean eyes. His hair softly swished against the strong winds, framing his face so well. You stared at his lips against the soft blue hue of the night. Even against the cold colours, the redness of his lips still managed to shine, making it look so soft.

“You okay?” He asked, worried.

Thank God he didn’t know how much you loved him under this soft light.

“I’m good, Tensei,” you say, turning to the road ahead of you.

.

.

.

You closed your eyes as you stepped into the sea, enjoying the feeling of the warm water brushing against your feet. The heat from the body of water warmed your whole body like a small blanket. You enjoyed the feeling of the soft sand against the soles of your feet, rubbing your skin like a massage. The fresh breeze hit your skin, waking your senses.

It felt as if you came home from a long day at work.

It was so relaxing, so calming.

You missed this - a lot.

You turned to face Tensei enjoying the sea as much as you did. His eyes were closed, taking in the salty yet fresh smell of the breeze.

The blue hues of the night painted his skin so well it was not fair. No one could deny how amazing he looked under the night’s palette - he carried it with such poise.

It was times like this where you were reminded how precious Tensei is. After all, he was the very person who taught you how to love.

His lips lifted into a smile as he opened them and saw you staring at him.

“I am just that good looking, huh?”

Scratch that - he was an annoying ass.

You stared at his legs your heart dropped.

This was the first time he’d ever come to the beach with his crutches.

You knew how much he loved the beach - he loved it even more than you.

He went on and on about his memories with Tenya, his friends and his personal ones that took place on the sand you stood on.

You knew how much he loved the beauty of this little oasis, but he could no longer enjoy it.

He was the one who brought you to this very beach, but could no longer feel the freedom it gave.

If he can’t stand by himself properly, he’ll stand beside me.

“Tensei,” you started, “Do you want to enter the waters with me?”

“I can’t, Y/N…” he trailed off, looking at his crutches.

“I only need to carry you to the sea. You know water buoyancy exists, right?” you remind him.

“But -”

“I’m coming there,” you say, getting out of the water and heading towards him.

You stood behind him, and slowly took his left arm off its crutch and placed it on your shoulder. You gripped his side, pulling him closer to you.

“Are you sure about this?”

“Yes, Iida Tensei,” you say, laughing, “I’ve thought this through - it’ll work. Besides, you still have to get that right arm to work properly - you can do that, right?”

I like being the teaser once in a while, Iida Tensei.

“Stupid,” he chuckles as he turns to face the sea, “Let’s do this.”

“Ok! So there are roughly around 3 steps we need to do to reach the waterline. Once we reach there, you’re going to let go of your crutch and press your weight against me. I’ll carry you on my back and bring you into the water. From then on out, you just need to keep at least one limb on me. Clear?”

“Why don’t you just let me use my crutches until the waterline?” he asked.

Oh.

“I didn’t think of it,” you say, smiling in embarrassment.

“Dumb,” he teased.

“Hey! I could easily drop you here, you know?” You say, chuckling.

“You wouldn’t,” he said as he kissed your cheek.

Damn you.

“Okay, okay - let’s move,” you said, focusing on the mission at hand.

One.

“Damn, this is hard - why are you so weak, Y/N L/N?” Tensei said.

“Be careful, sir - your safety depends on me.”

Two.

“Why are you so heavy?” You ask, panting.

“I haven’t exercised in a long time and I eat a lot, I basically move using a wheelchair - you need more reasons?”

“Understood, sir.”

Three.

“Ok, we’re here,” he said, smiling.

“Yeah, yeah - smile. I have to literally carry you now,” you say, irritated.

“Hey! You suggested this, not me.”

“I did, didn’t I?” you say, sighing.

“How about I sit down on the sand first? After that, you can push me from the back?”

“Sir, have you heard of gravity?” you retort, “But sitting down for a while sounds nice.”

You gripped his sides tightly as you heard him drop the other crutch to the floor.

Time for payback, sir.

You immediately dropped him, making him fall on his behind.

“I did say your safety depended on me,” you replied, smiling.

“Oh?”

Oh, shit.

Using his crutch, he hit your calves lightly but just enough to make you lose your stability and fall face-first onto the sand.

“I’m still smart, you know?” He replied, smug laced in his voice.

“I’m sorry - weren’t you the one who forgot the existence of gravity?” You retort, rubbing off the sand.

“Holy shit, Y/N,” he began laughing at your sand-filled face, “Why don’t have my phone with me? I need to take a picture of you!”

This idiot.

“You got a lot of guts to do that to me now, don’t you?” you say, forming a plan in your head.

“Well, you wouldn’t kill me, so I don’t see you doing anything that bad to me.”

I guess it’s time to prove you wrong.

You hit the back of his head with your shoe, earning a groan from him. You then began to tickle his sides, causing him to laugh uncontrollably. You heard his pleas to stop, but you didn’t care - he asked for it.

“I guess,” giggle, “I need,” giggle, “Oh, never mind.”

He pushed his back onto you, making you fall back onto the sand.

“You like sand, don’t you, Tensei?” you say, kicking his thigh.

He pressed his hands on the sand beside the two of you and slowly got up. Then, he turned himself to face your body laid on the dry sand.

“Knockout!” he shouted, making you laugh.

“You’re really dumb.”

“Tenya is the smart one, not me,” he said, moving closer to you.

He laid back against you, pressing his head against your chest. You grabbed his hands, once again playing with his fingers. His right hand found its place against your left cheek, the pad of his thumb rubbing your cheek in circular motions.

“You are still extremely heavy,” you say, cutting the silence between the two of you.

“You do this to me all the time!”

“On the bed! Not at the beach,” you retort.

He chuckled, enjoying your irritated expression.

“I love this,” he whispered, closing his eyes.

“I do too,” you say, ruffling his hair, “Next time, you be on the sand though.”

Laughter erupted from the male leaning against you.

You looked at his joy-filled expression. You can’t help but wish that this man before you remains as happy as he looked right now - preferably against the blue hues the sky had to offer. You want him to stay in your arms as you relish the moments you are in his. You want him to enjoy the riches of life he has provided to multiple residents of Musutafu. You want him to live his life by your side as you shield him from the harsh words of others.

“Thanks for this, Y/N,” he said, moving upwards to kiss your cheek.

“Happy birthday, Tensei. I love you.”

“Thanks, Y/N. I love you, too.”

You both, covered in sand with slightly wet clothes, shared a kiss under the pale moonlight of the night as a blue hue dusted your skin - maybe with a dash of scarlet on his, too.

“Now that that’s done…” Tensei whispered.

You were pushed by Tensei into the sea. The body of water’s salty liquid entered your body through your nose and your mouth, filling your senses with nothing but disgust.

Yep - still the same, annoying guy.

[oboevallis]

lost

sorry this is so long, i don’t know if it really makes sense but i was talking with him grandmother and she told me this story about how we went to the beach with the family and we went walking and it was late and high tide and we got absolutely completely lost and she didn’t speak great english and had no phone and we were just walking trying to find the hotel which all look the same while everyone was looking for us and that kinda inspired this story (lol sorry i feel like i do a lot of stories based on events that have happened to me so idk if that’s boring or not ill stop talking now tho)

Amelia quietly slipped out of bed once she realized her son was awake and babbling to himself, and she knew if she didn’t quickly attend to him, he’d start wailing causing the rest of the house to wake up. As much as she savored her sleep she enjoyed the early morning feeds, no one else was up, allowing her to be solely focused on her son. She quietly slipped out the back door to get settled on the lawn chair, and was startled when she saw Maureen, almost forgetting the two had come to visit.

“Good morning.” Maureen smiled, nursing her thermos of coffee.

“Morning.” Amelia reciprocated settling in the chair next to her.

“Hope you don’t mind I came back here. Eric is in a work call and I tend to distract him, and I just found myself out here.”

“No not at all.” The neurosurgeon responded truthfully as she guided her son to her breast, which he eagerly latched onto. “Thanks again for taking the kids for the day, it was much appreciated.”

“Of course. We had a great time with them.” The older woman smiled kindly, putting Amelia at ease. She tried so hard to make a good impression on her boyfriends parents and now felt at ease knowing they thought she was good enough for their son. “I don’t know how you and Link do it, especially in a pandemic. I mean you can’t take em to the park, museum, or anything.”

“Me either.” The woman absentmindedly chuckled, she was just taking it a day at a time. The women turned around once hearing the door open to reveal the oldest child.

“Auntie Amelia, I have a proposition for you.” Zola smiled as she walked further into the backyard still in her pajamas.

“A proposition huh?” The woman chuckled, it always impressed her when her niece would use a vocabulary word out of reach for a girl her age in the proper manner.

“Yep, I think we should not do school today, stay in our pjs, build a fort in the living room, and have a movie marathon.” The girl announced jumping on the balls of her feet, as much as Amelia wanted to oblige she knew she couldn’t.

“We can this weekend, but I’m sorry we can’t just not do school.”

“Ugh, but mom would let us.” This caused Amelia to laugh.

“We both know your mom would not in any capacity let you miss school if you weren’t sick.”

“It was worth a shot.” Zola shrugged.

“It was, but I’ll let you pick what we have for dinner tonight.”

“Pizza?”

“You’ve got it.”

“Do you think Link will still help me with my report.”

“I’m sure he’d love to, just let him sleep a bit more and once he wakes up ask him.” Zola nodded and ran back into the house, Amelia sighed in relief there wasn’t a tantrum.

“You’re good with kids, especially remediating a situation.” Maureen commented, admiring the younger woman more.

“I try.” Amelia chuckles, Maureen has only seen the kids well behaved and not in their tantrum state.

“So, I hate to be blunt, but my son doesn’t tell me a thing, are the two of you planning on getting married?”

“Oh, umm.” Amelia blushed awkwardly shifting her son. “Not at the moment, we’re going to wait until things calm down a bit.”

“As long as it’s in the cards.”

“I think it will be.” The neurosurgeon smiled, thinking about Links plans to get married in the French Quarter of New Orleans.

________________________________________

Bailey had an hour break before his next Zoom started up, so Link took the opportunity to take him out on their daily walk and get his energy out around the block while he tried to lull his son. This time though his father tagged along, he still had a lot of resentment towards his parents but was trying his best to be civil.

“That kid almost has as much energy as you did before..” Eric trailed off, but Link knew what he meant. Before his cancer tore his family apart, and made him a shell of the kid he was,but he was determined to only talk about the good things.

“Yeah he keeps Amelia and I on our toes.” Link quickly said, so no talk of his cancer came up.

“I know your upset with your mother and I, but we just want to help. And rebuild our family.” The ortho surgeon did his best to not roll his eyes at the statement, he couldn’t understand why they couldn’t have worked it out in the first place, why they decided to track along across multiple states during a global pandemic, and why they had to keep freaking his girlfriend out with the concept of marriage.

“I really don’t have the energy to talk about this right now, why don’t we just change the subject.” Before Eric could agree his sons phone started to ring. “Crap this is the hospital, I’ve gotta go in. Bailey! We gotta get home” He called up ahead to the boy who was scootering.

“It’s alright I’ll keep walking with them.”

“You sure?” The man asked wearily.

“Of course you know me I love a good walk.” He took the baby out of his sons arms and Link wrapped the baby snug across the older mans chest.

“Thanks dad!” He smiled as he jogged back to the house to grab his car and head to the hospital, while Eric caught up along side of Bailey as he turned another corner.

________________________________________

After Amelia finished helping Ellis with her math homework she realized it had been well over an hour since the boys had gone for their walk it typically lasted 40 minutes and the house was wearily quiet. She made her way downstairs to be met with Maureen folding the pile of laundry.

“Oh I’m sorry, you don’t have to do that.”

“Please, I don’t mind.”

“Do you know where the boys are?” Amelia asked feeling her anxiety start to rise as there was no indication of them being home.

“I assume they’re still walking, they haven’t walked in yet.” The neurosurgeon pulled out her phone and tapped on her boyfriends contact to be met with a scrub nurse who informed her, he was in fact scrubbing in on an emergency surgery.

“Link is at work.” Amelia informed Maureen rather confused, Link always told her before he left the house, but assumed he was so excited by the notion of a surgery and left the boys with his father.

“I’ll try Eric.” Once the older woman dialed the number they heard ringing coming from the coffee table where he left his phone. “I’m always telling him he needs to carry his phone around, he’s terrible with remembering it.” The woman huffed obviously starting to get a little startled.

“Okay.” Amelia took a deep breath. “I’m going to go look for them, would you mind staying with the girls?”

“Not at all.”

“Thanks.” Amelia quickly made her way towards the door and grabbed her keys from the hook, noting her boyfriend failed to bring the diaper bag as it was next to the door. Nonetheless she got into her car and tried the best to calm herself down, though all she could think about were worst case scenarios.

______________________________________

“Do you have any idea where we are?” Eric asked Bailey as he walked beside him, the boy had gotten tired and now just tracked the scooter along side them.

“No we usually don’t go this far.” Baileys fearless persona faltering, he assumed by this point he was late for class and was going to be in big trouble with his aunt and teacher.

“Everything kinda looks the same huh?”

“Yeah.” Bailey nodded nervously biting his nail, a habit he’d recently picked up from his aunt.

“Hey bud, it’s going to be fine we’ll find our way home.” Internally he was cursing himself for not bringing his phone along with him. After some more walking they found themselves on a street with convenience stores, Merediths house wasn’t far from the heart of Seattle but they were definitely far from where they were supposed to be. He was tempted to walk into a store and ask someone for directions but he didn’t have a mask and had two small children so that wasn’t an option. “Alright, let’s go back to that last street and make a left, maybe that right was a bad idea.”

“We’ll never get home.” Bailey said hopelessly.

“We will don’t worry about it.” And if things couldn’t get any worse the baby had started to fuss which in no time would turn into fill on crying.

Amelia slowly drove through the neighborhood looking for the three, not knowing she was on the opposite part of the neighborhood from them. Meanwhile after aimlessly walking and multiple turns Bailey started to recognize where they were and lead the way home.

“Where the hell have you been?” Maureen immediately asked as they walked through the door taking the now crying baby from her fiancé. “You need to have your phone on you!”

“Just strolling.” Eric responded nonchalantly.

“No we were lost. Really lost.” Bailey corrected as he ran into the kitchen to find something to eat since he missed lunch. Maureen followed taking out a bottle for Scout and calling her daughter in law informing her they were home, she heard a large sigh of relief through the other line.

Amelia happened to pull into the driveway the same time as Link, she wiped her stray tears as she had gotten herself into such a state and slammed her car door.

“Hey, where were you?” The ortho surgeon smiled brightly, he had just completed a rather simple surgery but just being in the OR at any capacity was heaven.

“Where was I? I don’t know, where was I?” Amelia chuckled on disbelief. “Where the hell were you? I spent two hours driving around trying to find your father and the boys.”

“What they never came home?” Link asked in a panic.

“They just did. They were lost and struggled to find their way home so they were aimlessly walking around while I aimlessly drove around in the wrong direction.”

“Damn it, how could my dad do this?” The man ran a stressed hand through his hair.

“This isn’t your dads fault it’s yours!”

“Huh?”

“Oh don’t act stupid. First you don’t even take the diaper bag in the walk with all the essentials and a first aid kit and then you up and leave for a surgery without even texting me.” The man was about to interject but Amelia held up her hand. “And you let your father continue the walk, even though the man has been to Seattle like two times and doesn’t know his way around.”

“I thought they were just gonna go the rest of the way up the block and back, and that he’d tell you where I went. That’s what Bailey and I do everyday.”

“Have you been living with Bailey for the past four months? Or has it just been me? Bailey will just keep riding that scooter no matter what and go any which way paying no attention to his surroundings, of course Eric is just gonna follow him around since it probably seemed he knew where he was going. You know what I can’t even look at you, I don’t want to say something I’m going to regret.” Amelia walked past him and quickly made her way into the house, to be met with her sons cries and quickly took the baby from Maureen cradling him closely, the baby immediately calming.

“I am so so sorry Amelia.” Eric apologized obviously upset.

“It’s not your fault.” Amelia forcefully smiled, she wasn’t entirely mad at him mostly at her boyfriend. Link then walked through the front door to be met with his mother scolding him.

“And what the hell were you thinking? Not telling anyone you were going to the hospital, and leaving your father with two kids in a place that’s foreign to him. Is surgery really all you can think about?” For the past couple of months he’d been complaining to his mother how much he hated not being able to operate.

“She would’ve done the same thing.” Link quickly pointed to his girlfriend who was cradling their son in the couch.

“What are we five?” Amelia asked when her boyfriend accused her in such a manner. “And I would’ve had the decency to tell you I was leaving and made sure you had the kids handled before I left.” Link backtracked and took a deep breath.

“Alright how about we just take a moment, they’ve been found so it’s fine.” The tired mother rolled her eyes and walked up the stairs with her baby, not in the mood for her boyfriends best case scenario talk.

“This could have been prevented by the both of you.” Maureen pointed to the two men who’s heads hung in shame.

“You should’ve made it clear to your father it was just up the block and back, and you should’ve texted the mother of your child.” She then directed her attention towards her husband. “And you need to pay more attention and keep your phone on you.”

“Sorry.” The two men answered in unison, ashamed to have messed up so greatly.

_______________________________________

The rest of the night was foreignly quiet, Bailey was exhausted and the couple was avoiding one another. After everyone had dinner together Maureen and Eric retreated back to the RV and the kids were all tucked in their beds. Once Link walked into the bedroom after his shower he sighed realizing Amelia wasn’t there. He quietly trekked into the nursery to be met with Amelia asleep in the rocking chair and her hand inside the crib, their sons hand was loosely holding her index finger. He would’ve smiled at the sight of he didn’t know what she was doing, her plan was to sleep in here tonight to avoid having to be in the same bed as him. He carefully removed her hand and picked her up out of the chair.

“Nooo.” Amelia sleepily groaned. “I’m sleeping in here.”

“No you’re not, your going to sleep in our bed.” He softly affirmed as he laid her down on her side of the bed. Once he moved to the other side of the bed and got settled his girlfriend was now wide awake and turned to face him.

“What happened today can never ever happen again.”

“It won’t I promise.”

“You know we’re so good at communicating within our relationship but not so great outside of it.” Link chuckled nodding in agreement. “You need to tell me when you get called in, and you need to let others know what the plan is, so they’re not getting lost in Seattle woth two small children.”

“I promise.” Link grabbed her hand in a reassuring manner. “I am so so sorry for what happened today, I was just so excited to be operating and I just lost my mind and didn’t think about anything outside of that operation.”

“I know this is hard for you, your not used to kids in the capacity that I am. You didn’t grow up in a loud house and you don’t have a large quantity of nieces and nephews. Your used to dealing with the occasional peds patient for like twenty minutes. I’m not saying your bad with kids I mean the peds floor loves you, it’s just this is a lot really quickly and non stop.”

“Wow you just articulated how I feel perfectly and I haven’t been able to even form a cohesive thought of what Im feeling.”

“Hmm, maybe that’s because you just sleep so you don’t have to think about feelings.” Link chuckled, sliding over to kiss her sweetly.

“I love you.” Link affirmed. “And I’m so sorry about today.”

“Tomorrow will be better.” Amelia agreed. “And I love you even more.”

“Impossible.”

[kal-rants]

(Not Really) Quick Thoughts on FE: 3 Houses

Me? Talking about a game that’s been out for almost two years now? You best believe it.

Quick Backstory before I bullet point this shit so I can get it out of my system. I played the game the day it released years ago and more or less finished it in a week. My first route was with Black Eagles and after finishing it was ultimately unsatisfied by the ending and set it down with no intention of doing the other routes. A friend started playing it late 2019 and was fawning over Dimitri and his route. Taking her word for it, I gave the game another go and decided to finally finish it. Took me a while but I finally finished the three main routes and oh boy...

The Houses

I loved all the women in Black Eagles but the guys were meh. Caspar was fun and by far my favorite of them, but Hubert grated on my nerves and Ferdinand was sweet but because I also had Sylvain on my team, I kept confusing the two (based on appearance not personality). 

The general cast of Blue Lions was by far my favorite. Every person in the house was so enjoyable and I actually loved getting the support conversations for all of them (Ashe is my favorite character). My only issue with the house was ironically Dimitri who I could not stand post time skip (a little more on that below).

By my Golden Deer run, I was mostly playing just to complete the game which might contribute to how lackluster I found them. I wanted to kill Lorenz so bad but he was so good at killing people and Ignatz was sweet but was so bad at killing people that I permanently benched him to focus on everyone else (played this one on hard mode). Almost all of their support conversations were fairly one note and after the layered convos of Blue Lions, I wanted more. Claude is incredible though and it became an inverse of my thoughts on Blue Lions.

Bonus: Yuri and Hapi were my immediate faves (even if Hapi was a glass canon on the field for half of the game) while Balthus and Constance where interesting but still meh for me. 

Plot

So I picked Black Eagles house solely because I was interested about Edelgard and I definitely didn’t realize I was signing up to side with the one starting a fucking war. While I loved Edelgard throughout, I found the actual route complicated for me, especially after the time skip where I was taking down people I didn’t want to take down. I was left feeling like I was following the bad guys even as the game tried to say otherwise and it left me with a bad taste. In retrospect, I’m sure the devs didn’t really intend for you to do this route first judging by how little they go in the way of explaining certain things such as Byleth and Those Who Slither In the Dark. Overall, I understood why Edelgard was doing what she was doing, but the game thought that was enough and didn’t even try to convince me why I should side with her outside of that and it only hurt her route overall. Plus, I am still annoyed that Edelgard dealt with TWS in the epilogue and not in her actual route WHEN SHE IS THE ONE WHO WAS ARGUABLY AFFECTED BY THEM THE MOST OF THE THREE HOUSE LEADERS LIKE WTF WHY GIVE THAT MOMENT TO CLAUDE.

I’ll be honest, I remember so little of what actually happened in the Blue Lions route which I attribute to me not being able to really get on board with Dimitri since BL is more or less an intimate character focused route for Dimitri’s growth. I’m not here to bash Dimitri, I’m just saying his shifts in character happened a little suddenly and there were other things about his character that were kinda just vanilla for me. I did find it weird that we never actually saw Rhea again even though getting her back was a big thing for most of the characters and you’re kinda left to wonder what even happened to her (another moment given to Claude’s run).

And finally the Golden Deers. By the 3rd time through all pre-timeskip stuff was so insufferable to get through, but the one saving grace was Claude’s insight in all of it. It made it feel different even though the events were the same. Post-timeskip his route really shines as it is able to bridge the gap between the war and the proxy war behind it with TWS. It’s also the only route that you actually get answers for shit that the other two ignore (which thematically makes sense for those routes but still). It is ironic though that this route did more to get me to sympathize with Edelgard that her own route did. It is technically the best route of the three hands down. 

Other

So Rhea. I went in not trusting her because Jeralt mentions to be on guard about her and, since I started with BE, my distrust was proven right since she is trying to rip open your heart to get Sothis back. That hatred/distrust ran through my other two routes up until the last few chapters of Claude’s where we actually get context for what was going on. I was left in a similar position that I was in with Edelgard where I could understand Rhea’s reasoning for doing everything she did, but I still couldn’t side with her considering that she is technically responsible for the worship of Crests and nobility. Also, who builds a church and places yourself on top to be worshipped? Also also, why even place such importance on Crests? I know about the interview with the developers saying she “had” to because of how humans viewed the 10 elites at the time, but I feel like there is another option to build peace between them that doesn’t involve the elevation of Crests. Also racism; really should have done more to prevent that from blossoming in the way that it did.  

So Edelgard. She seems to be a hot topic on Tumblr which tracks so I’m going to traverse this with extra tact. I do love her and overall, I do agree that the system that the Church built had become corrupt. I mean when multiple children have emotional and physical scars of that corruption at school, it’s hard to argue against that. Do I agree that starting a war is the best way to change things? Before 2020, I would have said no, that there had to be another way to change things. But now? I dunno sometimes a system is too corrupt to rebuild off of diplomacy alone and it definitely wouldn’t happen quickly enough in a person’s lifetime. Given Edelgard’s shortened lifespan, I do get why diplomacy would have never worked for her. I don’t think I can ever fully support Edelgard for the war she started and for siding with TWS (I know her reasons but that’s basically making a deal with the devil) but I can’t deny that her goals are admirable at the least. Will her winning said war even change things? Well who knows. That depends on how she implements them afterward. I’ve seen lots of people claim that it’s unrealistic for her to have been successful in changing anything after the war but I don’t know about that. If anything, Rhea proved that she could mold the world however she wanted after her war and if Rhea could do it, then why can’t Edelgard.

Considering the nastiness of racism, I can’t even believe that Claude’s run of “end racism” was going to be as successful as they think. Solid baby steps, maybe? But don’t know how well that’ll actually go in the long run.

Dimitri might have been overhyped or something but I expected so much more than what I got from him. In the Academy Era, he rang fairly vanilla in that he was a kind and honorable guy but not much else. Felix mentions how savage he is, but there weren’t very many hints of that pre-timeskip (that I remember anyway). Obviously he was a ticking time bomb and later Dimitri shows that. And I was totally on board with slowly helping Dimitri become human again, but that’s not really what happened. You’re not allowed to do anything with Dimitri other than get his brief blurb in Explore or toss him into battle. I know why they did it, but because they shut him off from you so completely, I had problems being able to connect with him in the post time skip and ended up rolling my eyes whenever he started talking. It also made his change after Rodrigue died so sudden and it felt v forced for me. They really could have done a better job at it is all I’m saying. 

Ashe and Mercedes had the cutest S-support epilogue and I will die for them. 

Dorothea deserves the world and Yuri and Dorothea making an Opera troupe for commoners is the best thing.

I wanted so much more for Leonie but they stuck so hard to the Jeralt fangirl label that she never really grew beyond that. 

[redbeardace]

Asexuality Activism Report Card

[This post is a submission for the October Carnival of Aces, hosted by @asexualawarenessweek, on the theme “Reaching In, Reaching Out”]

Every year around Ace Week, I tend to give encouragement and suggestions about the type of outreach or activism we can do.  This year, I’m going to do things a little different and instead give a report card on where I think we are in terms of various kinds of activism/outreach/visibility.

These are solely my opinions and my categories and are based on my experiences and not any kind of exhaustive research or survey.  Please feel free to provide your own grades and suggest other areas I might have missed.  I also want to note that these grades are not an indictment or attack on any particular group, person, or project.  If you’re working on any of these things, you’re part of the solution and your work will make these grades improve over time, so keep at it!

And if you’re doing any of these things, please plug your projects, so people will know about them!

Intra Community - A

We focus an awful lot of energy inward, and that’s a good thing.  Extending a helping hand, providing resources, hosting chatrooms, making podcasts, organizing meetup groups, writing lengthy blog posts, hosting conferences and unconferences, selling t-shirts...  We’re doing a pretty good job supporting each other from the inside.

Queer Community - B

There are quite a few mainstream LGBTQ groups who openly support us.  We often hold our meetups at the queer community center in town.  Many aces are involved with LGBTQ organizations.  There’s an ace group who goes to Creating Change every year.  We’re an obligatory part of many organizations’ Pride messaging.  Lots of groups now deliberately use the “LGBTQIA” variant of The Acronym, and make it clear that “A” isn’t for “Allies”.  The ace group in the NYC Pride Parade this year (likely the biggest pride parade ever) was deliberately selected to be the 10th contingent, which is a huge deal because the parade was literally 12 hours long.

There are obviously challenges.  The uninformed who don’t understand why we’re at the table.  The deliberate trolls who relentlessly hound us online.  But those people will become irrelevant over time.

Unfortunately, this year marked the first time where I saw Rainbow Capitalism set its sights on us.  (With a big name ace group complicit in the exploitation...)  So that’s not good.

Everyone Else - D

We are not doing well in this area.  There are a few people out there who have heard of asexuality, but not many.  Most people use the word wrong or as the insulting punchline to a joke.  There isn’t a single household name who has come out as asexual and put themselves out there as an advocate.  It’s better than it was 8 years ago, but we’re still mostly invisible.

I don’t really have any suggestions here (except that if you’re famous and asexual, COME OUT), because most of the suggestions I’d have are covered in the other areas.

Direct Outreach - F

By “Direct Outreach”, I’m referring to deliberately trying to find people who are asexual but who are unfamiliar with the term or that do not recognize that they’re asexual for whatever reason.  It’s sort of a subset of a lot of these other groups.  (And it could probably use a better name...)

I’m calling this out explicitly, because I think this can have the most impact, if we can figure out effective ways of doing it, and I don’t think anyone’s really doing this.  (I sort of tried, but it didn’t really work out...) Basically, it would be able getting information about asexuality in front of the people who need it.  Taking over the search results for “Why don’t I want sex?”.  Writing articles about how some guys just don’t care about that sort of thing for a men’s magazine.  Maybe even a direct person to person conversation with that friend who never seems to date.  I don’t know, exactly.  If I knew, I’d be doing it.  But I think it needs to be done.

Fiction Media - C+

There are books with ace characters now!  Pretty much entirely YA, though.  And either a love story focused on the asexual character being asexual, or where asexuality is a tangential inclusion token with no real value.

There are TV shows with positive ace characters now!  Huge step forward from lows of Better Half!  Three shows, in fact!. Two of which have been canceled, and the third of which is about to have its final season.  And none of which are anywhere close to the popularity of House.  And none of which are anywhere close to the popularity of another show which completely erased a main character’s canon asexuality.

There are movies with ace char-  Oh no, no there aren’t.  Never mind.  Same with video games.

While some strides have been made, and having productions actively consulting with groups like Ace LA is a huge step forward, we’re still largely living an area of headcanons and unverified conjecture and Word Of God retcons.  There’s so much more than can be done.

Most importantly, we shouldn’t fawn over and praise any little scrap of hope.  Demand better.

If you’re in a position to make things, make them.  If you’re in a position to influence things to be made, influence them.  If you’re in a position to boost content that is made, boost it.

Non-Fiction Media - C-

There are starting to be articles about asexuality that go beyond the typical sensational “There are some people who claim to be asexual, can you believe that, isn’t that SO STRANGE” or the blandly informational 101 interview featuring a picture of sad grey people in bed.  Not many, but they’re there.  But, at the same time, there are blazingly dismissive assholes hiding behind Ph.Ds, writing things like “’demisexual,’ an unnecessary new substitute for the word ‘human’ ” in articles that are published in 20-fucking-19.

There are a number of podcasts and YouTube videos talking about asexuality, but I don’t know how much reach they have outside of the ace community.

There’s one documentary that hasn’t aged well and I think has been removed from most streaming services, and another that hasn’t been released yet and is phenomenal and you should all see it.  So that...  Two documentaries.

Taking a quick look on Amazon, there are about seven books of substance on asexuality.  Three are academic queer theory textbooks with a very specific audience.  Two are self-published.  One is a weird collection of essays, half of which have little to do with asexuality at all, written by someone who isn’t ace and who didn’t seem to bother even talking to aces for much of the book.  That leaves one book about asexuality for a general audience written by an asexual that had a real publishing run.  Just one.

Same with the fiction media, don’t go around hyping any article that mentions asexuality.  Some of them are REALLY REALLY BAD.  There was one a few months ago that said in an infographic that “Girls working part time have a 33% chance of becoming asexual”, yet it was being uncritically passed around by some high profile aces.

So, y’know, Cs get Degrees or whatever, but we can do soooo much better in this area.  Someone go write a book about asexual dating.  Someone go write a book about asexual history.  Go.  Do.  Now.

Education/Schools - D

Well, it seems like it’s getting at least mentioned occasionally, and groups like Asexual Outreach have put some work towards this.  But we’re still left out of sex ed in most places, and when we are included, the information can be confused, inaccurate, or even ridiculed by the instructor.  Tackling this area will, over time, help out every other area on this list, because the next generations will all know and understand what asexuality is, and we won’t have to start from zero in order to get anything done.

Political/Legal - F

Earlier this year, I did a cursory review of anti-discrimination laws as they pertain to asexuality.  Where asexuality was protected, it was often by accident.  Only one state explicitly mentioned asexual people.  Many states which did have strong LGBT anti-discrimination protections have defined “sexual orientation” in such a way to exclude asexuality.  Even the “Equality Act” that the Democrats have made a lot of noise about this year has that narrow definition.

We need to start making connections with politicians and political groups, and we need to start leveraging our connections with queer organizations to get them to push for better language in these laws.  (Many of the non-discrimination laws were deficient or bizarre in multiple ways, so we’d all be better off with improvements.)

And I should note that it’s an F--- as far as protections for aromantics…

Health Care - D+

Well, we managed to get parts of the DSM-V rewritten.  But even those parts are less than ideal.  There are some therapists and doctors who are well versed in asexuality, and others who, as I mentioned above, hide behind their Ph.Ds writing horrible things and going unchecked.  There’s a raft of sex pills with marketing that explicitly targets people who are probably asexual but don’t know it yet, trying to sell them worthless junk that will make them suddenly black out randomly or permanently change the color of their skin.  We’re still not an option on the clipboard the doctor hands you to fill out.  We’re still forced to take unnecessary and invasive tests for no practical reason.

I think we need to be showing up at health care conferences.  We need to be reaching out to local providers.  We need to be telling people how they should be treating us, instead of letting them fumble around and hopefully get it right on their own.

[travllingbunny]

The 100 6x03 The Children of Gabriel

The last episode was a character-based one focused on our protagonists and the issues simmering below the surface, which came out during the eclipse-induced psychosis. This one was very much focused on world-building, and was such an overload of new information about two new groups of potential antagonists that I had to watch it twice to pick up all of it. But while there was no time for any longer talks about feelings and character stuff, there were quite a few small and/or subtle character moments that were quite meaningful.

We finally get the introduction of Russell Lightbourne (JR Bourne), the leader of the „peaceful“ society of Sanctum, and a few other characters, including his wife Simone, and we get a look at how their society works; and we also meet, for the first time, the mysterious people who are lurking in the woods and appear to be some sort of a rebel/guerrilla group, and who are referred to as „the children of Gabriel“. The first thing I did after seeing the episode was to make a Twitter poll: „Who is creepier?“ with the third option: „Both are super creepy“. At the moment, Russell’s people are presented as pseudo-good guys, but everything about them all but screams that their society is very sinister. The „children of Gabriel“, on the other hand, are presented as pseudo-antagonists, and while I’m more inclined to see them as potential not-so-bad-guys, I would hesitate to call them good, either: they are very grey. And both groups give off cult vibes. It’s possible that there really are no good guys among the people on this planet – or if there is a someone else that may be a good guy, that it’s a third faction that we haven’t met yet – at least not in the present.

The hijackers from 6x02 indeed belonged to Russell’s people, so for a society that’s supposedly „peaceful“, they sure didn’t make a good first impression. Kaylee – that’s apparently the name of the woman who’s the sole survivor of that group of four – was blaming the Earthkru for killing three of them, while saying „we hurt no one“. Err, you came in masked, attacked their ship, tried to hijack it and took people captive. Of course they defended themselves, what the heck did you expect?! New planet, but yet again we have to deal with hypocritical people who attack the protagonists and then blame them for defending themselves. 

There’s no way that Russell and his society aren’t bad guys, right? They are elitist, self-righteous, judgmental, hypocritical, they believe in "special bloodlines" and treating some people as "disposable", they give off creepy cult vibes, Russell straight up makes a comparison between his society and Mount Weather after having heard the story about them – and while I don’t think that Sanctum people are too similar to Mountain Men, as I point out here, this is a big hint that this society is very sinister. They are giving me Capitol vibes (minus the actual Hunger Games, because they’re anti-violence). Including the bad kind of pacifism - the “war is terrible, but oppression, classism and treating people as disposable is OK, so anyone taking up arms to rebel against us is evil”. And I'm pretty sure they have been doing some sort of a mind transfer of the Primes (members of the four founding families from the Eligius 3 mission) into the brains of "hosts" (apparently, being a Nightblood makes you a suitable host) in a ceremony they call „Naming“. This may be technically just speculation at this point, but it’s really, really strongly hinted.

My theory on the „Naming“ ceremony however, is different than the popular opinion in the fandom that the Primes fully take over the bodies of the „hosts“ and that the hosts disappear I don't think it's a full replacement, but more like an upgrade, where the host is changed and the Prime is supposed to be in the driving seat. (Maybe it’s because I’m thinking of the skinchanging in A Song of Ice and Fire and some of the storylines in Dollhouse.) For starters, Delilah was not happy about becoming a Prime, but she didn’t seem to think that she would disappear and her body would be simply overtaken by someone else – and I think she would be way more freaked out if that were the case. Similarly, even in a cult, I can’t see parents being happy for their children to become Primes if it meant that their bodies are overtaken and that they basically disappear. And it would also make it a lot more interesting storyline – especially if the fandom speculation about in Clarke becoming a host for Josephine is correct (and it probably is, in some form – there are quite a few hints towards that, and the setup happened in this episode, when Rose, the blonde little girl who was meant to be a host for a Prime, was kidnapped/rescued by the Children of Gabriel). If the hosts were fully overtaken by the Primes, then this takeover is either never going to happen, or will never be full or will last very short, and Clarke will be saved. But if Clarke and Josephine can co-exist in the same brain for some time, this may open new storytelling possibilities – where Clarke is obviously not going to be obliterated by Josephine, but the two may co-exist in the same brain and body, fight for dominance but also possibly even be allies and work together, so to speak, and maybe help each other? This could indeed be the „acting challenge“ for Eliza Taylor that so many of the cast and crew have talked about.

But what kind of technology exactly are they using to transfer minds? The most likely theory is that it is derived from an early, less developed prototype of the chip/Flame, which Becca already worked on before the apocalypse. There are too many ties between Eligius Corporation, Becca and the Second Dawn. Madi will be in real danger if/when Russell and co. find out about the Flame.

The Children of Gabriel are more mysterious of the two group so far. Unlike the Sanctum people, they may end up being more on the (relatively) good side, and they're rebels fighting against the eternal dominance and prolongation of life of the Primes - but they still planned to kill the hosts as the B-plan if they couldn't kidnap/rescue them. So, killing the Primes is more important than protecting/saving people. Their chanting "death is life" and "death to Primes" also sounds cult-like (even though I think the words themselves are less sinister than they first sound, as they probably refer to stopping the endless cycle of Primes replicating themselves), and they are mostly motivated by trying to impress or get back into the good graces of "the Old Man"...  Is the Old Man Gabriel? I don’t know how he would still be alive, but I feel he is – but not through the same means as the other Primes are prolonging their lives, because CoG hate the Primes and what they do. In any case, this group seems just to be a group of guerrilla fighters, who have also infiltrated the Sanctum – but we haven’t seen whatever larger group of people they are part of, or what their settlements look like. Have they been cast out by the „Old Man“?  

Some big hints about the history of the planet were dropped: Gabriel is considered a "demon" and hated by Russell and his people, who tell the story of how he thought he could walk on water after being bitten by the snake whose poison works as an antidote to the seaweed poison. (The snake that was named by Josie.) Meanwhile, Russell Lightbourne is worshiped as a savior. But it is Russell who has the last name that's very similar to "Lucifer" (which means lightbearer), even though Gabriel seems to be the one who was cast out of this "paradise", or didn't want to be a part of it. And apparently, Russell has the same first name as Sean Maguire’s character we met in the flashback in 6x02, the astronomer and Josie’s father – and is probably his latest incarnation. But Russell was the one who killed many of the original Primes during his eclipse-induced psychosis, shouting „Sanctum is mine“, while Gabriel, the geneticist, Josie’s boyfriend, was the one who got away and survived. So what is going on? False history?

But while the new characters and societies are intriguing, what is more interesting is how it all affects our protagonists. I don't know how long it will be till they start realizing that how sinister this peaceful society is (they don’t have all the info they need as of now), but right now, they are too focused on the fact that they need someone to teach them how to survive on this planet (with not just eclipse-induced psychosis, but also poison seaweed, swarms of bugs, meat-eating trees and so many other weird and dangerous things), which is why trying to convince them to accept them into their society seems to them, understandably, like the best course of action.

At the same time, the fact that Clarke, Bellamy and the others want to find peace and be the „good guys“ as Monty told them, is another reason why they are likely to try to see Russell’s people in a good light. I feel like Sanctum is going to be a temptation to Clarke in particular (based on this episode and trailer hints) for multiple reasons, and they are already trying to suck her in. It feels like a peaceful, happy place, with things that she has only read about and maybe seen on videos but never in real life – such as dogs. (Having an adorable dog come up to you is truly one of the biggest temptations possible.) She gets to wear beautiful dresses, Russell acts nice to her, and kind of looks like her father. But her emotional state is especially making her vulnerable. She feels so much guilt and wants to do better, wants to ensure this better life for her people, while Russell and Simone (playing a good cop/bad cop) are interrogating her about the supposedly terrible past of her and her people. They are sitting there at a table with a huge banquet made just for three people, somewhere in their Renaissance Fair-like castle,  and being judgmental about the things they did to survive or protect their loved ones. And now that they know that she is a Nightblood, she is a target – but how far would Clarke go to try to ensure her people stay in Sanctum? Would she even agree to be a host, both for them and because she’s had self-loathing and suicidal thoughts, so losing herself into someone else’s consciousness may be additionally appealing to her in her current state?

Some themes that have always followed Clarke’s character are: privileged background (reflected in her nickname „Princess“, which I think fans tend to romantcize way too much), tendency to take on too much responsibility, to take charge, but also to isolate herself, desire to save people (which may be either saving everyone – or just saving those she loves), ruthlessness in pursuit of that goal, self-sacrifice. One of the repeated situations throughout the show is: other leaders who have been Clarke’s allies/friends/occasional antagonists would tell her that she is "born to lead" just like they are (which may be just about her personal qualities and tendency to take charge and responsibility in tough situations, but also has some other, less pleasant connotations, when said by people who are royalty/„special bloodlines“ – for being born with Nightblood like Lexa, or as a son of a Queen, as Roan), and try to encourage her to treat people as disposable, as a part of making tough decisions. But no one has been so blatant about it to actually use the word „disposable“, as Russell has. And now he also thinks that Clarke literally has „royal blood“. (The funny thing about it is – she doesn’t, she became Nightblood through science. Emori was very close to becoming one instead. But you know what's even funnier? Everyone who is Nightblood /on Earth or on Sanctum/Alpha- became that through science, or their ancestors did. Of course, valuing people for their bloodline is nonsense, period.)

But Clarke had a few great moments in this episode that made me very happy. First she refused to bow to Russell, and then when she made it clear to Russell that she is going to risk herself first, not anyone else, and that „None of us are (disposable)“. But since those were things I expected, I was particularly happy that Clarke refused to be guilt-tripped about Mount Weather and made it clear that she wasn't going to apologize for saving the people she loves from those trying to murder them. YES. People have made Clarke feel guilty about that way too many times. What she, Bellamy and Monty did was the right thing to do, and most of the adults on Mount Weather were not innocent.

Murphy’s clinical death experience opens up a very interesting and completely new storyline. We’ve had characters talking about what they think happens after death, but (outside of characters whose minds are being preserved in the Flame), this is the first time someone has come close to seeing or thinking they had seen what happens after death. But is this really a normal clinical death experience, or did Murphy have hallucinations while still unconscious, caused by the poison or the antidote? It’s the first time anyone on the show has mentioned the concept of people going to hell due to their sins. I can’t wait to see what character development this causes in Murphy.

There wasn’t much talk about what happened during the eclipse-induced psychosis, which makes sense – people are simply aware that they weren’t really to blame and no one is holding it against anyone (not to mention that they have so much urgent stuff to deal with), but the deeper emotional issues are something that we know about and that I expected to be addressed later in the season. Naturally, they addressed what happened to Murphy the most, since they nearly lost him. Emori was as loving and caring to him as she was violent and murderous during the psychosis, and felt guilty over attacking him, while Bellamy comforted her pointing out that Murphy’s condition was not her fault but his. (These two had some very nice friendship moments in season 5, and it’s nice to see that again.) Bellamy and Murphy had a very warm friendship moment, and Raven showed her relief and happiness about him being alive in her usual snarky manner.

On the other hand, while Bellamy and Clarke didn’t talk about what happened during the psychosis, or what happened during season 5 (yet – we know from the trailer that a big conversation is coming, just not when), they confirmed the trust they have in each other through actions, and small moments of exchanging meaningful looks. Bellamy showed that he still trusts in Clarke’s ability to be again a leader and ambassador of their people– although it was, at the same time, a smart decision and quick thinking. Russell got the impression Clarke was the leader, from the way she was the one asking questions (which happened mostly because she was asking about Murphy’s condition, and later in particular when she was showing concern for Madi – these are the things that spur her into action), and, as Bellamy pointed out, Russell seems to like her, so it was a good idea to use that. Raven was rolling her eyes* (this happened shortly after she angrily remarked „I didn’t know you were giving orders again, Clarke“), and I wonder if she again thinks that Bellamy is „taking Clarke’s orders“ or „a knight by his queen’s side“ or whatever she thought in season 3, which wasn’t really true back then either – but that would especially be funny now, since Bellamy wasn’t relinquishing leadership at all: he has been the one telling everyone what to do and did that right after that scene, after Russell left, and no one has a problem with taking his orders. (Except Octavia, who’s not listening to anyone and still does whatever she wants.) In fact, telling Russell „She is. She can speak for us“ was also kind of giving Clarke a role – so he felt he needed to explain his reasons to her, immediately after Russell left. And unlike Raven, he is not threatened by Clarke being perceived as the leader, and her being his co-leader (one whose role is more of an ambassador who gets to interact with the other leader) is a return to a familiar dynamic that works.

Bellamy taking the responsibility to get Madi from the dropship and saying „I promise“, and Clarke silently accepting that and trusting him with her daughter’s safety, was a really important moment and callback to the most painful moments between them in season 5. It shows they are healing from the terrible misunderstandings – and that Clarke is now thinking about everything differently than she did at the time. Back then, she saw Bellamy’s actions, after he had promised her to keep Madi safe, as a deep, awful betrayal, but now she seems to understand that he saw putting the Flame in Madi as a way to protect Madi and Clarke and everyone else. It’s funny that the fandom was expecting a big and long separation between these two, but instead, they were reunited in the same episode – and the show still managed to use the short separation to show Bellamy walking away and looking back, and Clarke looking at him leaving with a sad, longing look (only interrupted by the adorable dog), and then a reunion with „you kept your promise“ heart-eyes.

*At this point, I feel a bit fed up with the constant bitter and angry remarks Raven is constantly throwing at Clarke. She has reasons to feel angry over Clarke’s betrayal in season 5, but it’s time they talk it out, because this is kind of annoying, especially when it’s the only thing Raven gets to do in the episode. Diyoza was amazing

A lot of people have remarked on the awkwardness of the hug between Bellamy and Echo, and there have been lots of comments about actor chemistry etc. – but thinking that acting choices are random or dictated by how actors feel about a fictional relationship is pretty insulting to the actors, and directors and editors, and also doesn’t make much sense: people who make the show are not incompetent, and all the moments of Bellamy showing more emotion and interest for Clarke compared to how he is with Echo, cannot be accidental, just like it can’t be accidental that there are so many times all three are framed within the same shot, with Echo positioned as the third wheel rather than Clarke. Echo herself may be increasingly noticing this, just as she may have noticed that Bellamy is valuing Clarke’s opinions more than hers or at least tends to agree with and side with her more. Echo suggested fighting, Clarke retorted that they should instead try to be friends and be welcomed in that society, and Bellamy said nothing, but obviously supported Clarke’s position later. (In season 5, when they were still on the ship and Clarke-less, Echo and Bellamy also had a big difference in opinion when Echo was suggesting they killed the 300 prisoners in their cryo-sleep, but Bellamy shut that down quickly, and Echo then agreed with him.) This could make her think that psychosis!Emori was right when she called her a spy „serving her master“, once again, which provoked Echo’s hallucination of her past with the Ice Nation and Queen Nia.

One thing that Echo decided and Bellamy wasn’t too happy about, but did not protest, was inviting Octavia to come with them and Raven to help bring Madi and others from the dropship. He probably realized that it was for the best that they take Octavia as far away from people they wanted to convince that they’re good and peaceful. But Echo may have done it as a combination of hoping Octavia and Bellamy reconcile – because she thinks it would be good for him – and because she values the fact that Octavia is a strong fighter. She respects people who are capable and can be ruthless (which is why she doesn’t blame Clarke, either), and the idea that it’s good to use Octavia’s abilities is similar to what Bellamy initially told her at the end of season 4, that she’ll be useful for them because she’s strong and can help them survive.

But Bellamy is not able to be so chill about things when Octavia is concerned. And she went and confirmed all the worst things he thought about her: that she is not trying to change at all, isn’t admitting any mistakes, and is going to use violence and kill people as her first choice, even when it’s not necessary. The fact that even Diyoza angrily pointed out that it wasn’t necessary shows that this was the case. Leaving Octavia behind may seem very harsh from Bellamy, as is his line that his sister died a long time ago, but I like the fact that he’s sticking to his guns and cutting her out of his life and not allowing her to be a part of the group before she shows a will to change, because an insta-forgiveness/ acceptance would prevent her from even trying – and would harm everyone else, too. At the same time, I don’t think he really wants her to die, contrary to what she said – it was obvious on his face how painful the decision was for him - and I don’t think he really thinks she will (Octavia is capable, has a sword, and has survived a lot of things before). He thinks that she needs to have her own soul-searching on her own – which is probably right.

Not that Octavia will be by herself, since she immediately attacked and got captured by the Children of Gabriel, led by a new character Xavier (Chuku Modu). Ironically, she may end up being the first to learn more about and maybe see the perspective of that group of people (after killing three of them for no good reason) – even though the first interactions are less than pleasant.

Another person who may get in touch with them is Diyoza, who got cast out of Sanctum by Russell, in spite of being 6 months pregnant, after he learned who she was. (I guess they don’t practice keeping people in prison for any longer period of time.) According to him, her reputation as an evil terrorist is so bad that her picture is in their history books next to Hitler and Bin Laden.  So how come they didn’t recognize her immediately? Unless he is exaggerating. Diyoza’s backstory is something I really, really want to know more about. Diyoza herself claimed in S5 that she was fighting against a „fascist“ government. Somehow I feel that she wasn’t really the evil one, especially when Russell and her people hate her.

Diyoza was amazing in this episode, again, and is quickly rising even more on my list of favorite characters. She was a no-nonsense and capable military person that she always is, and made snarky remarks to Gaia about the whole Madi being a Commander thing, basically that she should leave Madi alone to just be a child. Madi was herself a bit annoyed with Gaia’s lessons and snarky, but then felt just as insulted as Gaia when Diyoza made her comments, because she does take the Flame and her role seriously.

When Madi mentioned the scary, evil „Dark Commander“ (Sheidheda) that she sees in her dreams, Diyoza seemed like she had an idea who it may be. Someone from Second Dawn? It’s been speculated that it was Cadogan, though the figure seen in the trailer is not played by the same actor. (BTW, I know that Sheidheda means „Dark Commander“ (shade –dark, heda = commander), but I can’t be the only one thinking that the writers or the guy creating the Grounder speech had a sense of humor and intentioanlly made it sound like Sh*ithead?)

Jordan was adorable, and his romance with Delilah was as cute as insta-romances between two cute people who have just met can be, when they have nice chemistry - but he’s starting to learn that he shouldn’t trust people so easily and that his naivete can be very harmful to the group. He can’t go on being treated and acting as a child in a body of a man in his mid-20s.

This was a nice setup for the rest of the season. 

Rating: 8/10

[nerdy-flower]

@sinunamor IT IS WRITTEN

Sorry for the heckin long wait ;^; here it is! Ernest Growing Up Part 3/3! (For now~)

(Ernest curses a lot and it’s a little sad at the beginning, otherwise it’s G)

It isn't working.

In spite of everything, Ernest came out of college doing kind of okay. He had an alright resume, a little pocket of savings, some furniture. Better than some kids he sat next to at graduation, for sure. He gets that coveted first apartment to himself- literally a room and a bathroom. The water pressure is like a dog lifting its leg and peeing on him and the neighbours are obnoxious, but it was his. He was paying rent! Utilities! Insurance, even! Life was looking up! Was.

He stayed in the city he went to school in, With his Pop's new condo a half hour away, it didn't feel so far. They'd have dinner all the time. Pop would give him tips on places to go and things to see. At one point, he says he wouldn't have moved here if he didn't know Ernest was staying. Ernest didn't have a great answer for that, tongue sudden;y stuck. They get froyo anyway.

His shit job became two shit jobs and then one again, then two, then three very briefly, then one with occasional paid-in-cash online ads stuff. Maybe illegal? Only in a tax law way, so whatever. He busts his ass- well, some of the time. Sometimes he half-asses it and gets paid anyway, other times he gets fired, depends on the place. What it comes down to is that he never has enough money. All the Gen Z-targeted personal finance advice blogs are shit, too. “Get a roommate!” For where? The cupboard under his kitchen sink?

Actually, in his postal code, someone might take it. But they'd be just as broke as him.

Even now, he feels spoiled and pathetic. Plenty of people just had to make do, they didn't have a Dad to send cheques in the mail, a stepdad to order them groceries online, a Pop to full-on spot them rent money. He tries and tries to make it work and he /can't./

Finally, he picks up the phone. “Dad?”

“Ernest? What's the matter? Is everything-”

“Can I come home?” With his stuff, he means, with the furniture he can't use anymore and his rejected debit card and-

Hugo makes this little noise, a very parental click of concern that sticks right in his chest. “Of course, always.”

Lucien drives him because he's been working solely off his laptop and following Pablo around the East Coast. Ernest isn't a hundred percent on what he does, but it's enough to pay for a rental van and a premium streaming account so commercials don't interrupt their drawn-out silence on the way back North to Maple Bay.

“Do you need to be an asshole about this? I said I was sorry, okay? I'll pay you back as soon as I get money, /god./”

“All I asked,” Lucien drawls, smartass as always. “Is if you wanted me to buy you a bagel. So I'll just buy your least favourite one and we'll carry the fuck on, shall we?”

Ernest officially hates everything forever, but mostly himself.

Dad and Damien welcome them home with big, awkward hugs and lots of understanding when he wants to go to bed straightaway and they left his room the way it was and /fuck/-

Pics or it didn't happen, as the young adults say. If no one sees him crying and hugging his teddy in his mid-twenties, it never took place.

His dignity drops a few more points the next day when he has to beg and plead with his Dad not to tell Pop.

“What if he goes to your place and you're not there?” Hugo insists, hands soapy from washing the dishes. “He'll be so worried!”

“He always calls or texts first, always,” Ernest thrusts another dried plate into the cupboard and balls his fists together. “I'm not gonna pretend forever, honest. /Please/, Dad,  just a few more days, that's all I'm asking. It's my thing to tell him, anyway!”

“Okay, okay,” Hugo holds his hands up in a peacemaking gesture. He tucks some overgrown hair behind his ear- shit, he's gone even more grey. His dads are going grey and he can't afford his own Netflips account. “I won't tell him, but if he calls and asks, I'm not going to lie. Alright?”

“Fair enough,” Ernest sighs through his nose, tucking the cutlery away in brooding silence. Goddammit, he's too old to brood. This sucks.

Hugo watches him a minute before draining the sink. “Have you heard from Carmensita? She's back in town, you two should meet for coffee or something. Get your mind off things.”

Ernest swings his head around, barely listening to the second half of the sentence. “She's back already? I know she was talking about it, but- yeah. I'll text her.”

He does, and they meet up, later that day because his schedule is open indefinitely. He waves to River and Crish, doing something with multiple types of sportsballs in the Cahn family driveway and thankfully too focused to do more than wave back. Carmensita comes strolling out of Mat's house in a flower-print romper and jogs up the sidewalk to him and he's never, ever been so happy to see someone.

Except that time he got lost at Disney World, but we don't talk about that.

“There's my favourite human!” Ernest laughs as she hops up to hug him. He insists he never got taller, she got shorter, but she still gives the greatest hugs. “No more braids, huh? That's a big change.”

Carmensita giggles and teases her fingers through her mohawk, her sides shaved down to thatches of brown fuzz. “I just got it done, do you like it? It's pretty different, for me at least.”

“I love it,” Ernest scratches one side of her undercut until she playfully bats his hand away. “Nah, it suits you. Makes you look cool and smart, like you're gonna mess somebody up but with your know-how instead of your fists.”

“Overly specific, but I'll take it.” Carmensita grins, a flash of snarky white and he feels like he can stand up straighter. They wave again at the over-active River on their way across the cul-de-sac, and 'Sita leans in to him, talking behind her hand. “You heard about Ashley and Mary, right?”

“Yeah, I sure did.” Ernest glances across the street, almost feeling eyes on him from Mary's house. Which used to be Julian's house, but then Julian and Damien talked and agreed to sell it to Mary shortly after her divorce so she could get out of Damien's spare bedroom and have enough space that custody would be a non-issue. Julian was totally cool with it, because he was practically moved in with Mat anyway and Amanda was fully settled into New York- “God, this neighbourhood is weird.”

“Something in the groundwater, I think,” Carmensita laughs, shaking her head. “Craig's the real deal though. He's legit totally cool with it. I was here in time for the first summer BBQ and I expected, y'know, some awkwardness.”

“Folks around here save all the awkwardness for their kids,” Ernest drawl to make her laugh again. It's nearly sticky outside, but he refuses to remove his sweater. He goes bare-armed for exactly two months a year, tans up real nice, and goes right back into his cotton cocoons of happiness. “So how's life n'stuff?”

“Life n'stuff is pretty good. I've got all my boxes unpacked in less than two months, so that's my record.” She slips off her glasses to polish them on her shirt. “I'll show you my place when we get there, I'm teaching piano lessons out of my living room right now, and- oh! You know what tonight is, right? Are you busy?”

Ernest shakes his head to both, he's been too depressed to check social media and he definitely isn't busy. “What's tonight?”

Carmensita grins wide and imitates an airhorn to punctuate her words. “Open mic night! Woo woo woo!”

It's a little different to watch from the audience with everyone else. The Cahn twins are working part-time at the Spoon now and they're the ones doing the backstage stuff. Lucien drives into town for it, Pablo's tour wrapping up with 'boring business shit' that he'd apparently rather skip. The three of them claim a corner table with high stools and enjoy the quirky parade.

His dad was right, it is nice to forget about his bullshit for a while. He recognizes kids he used to see racing around the playground strumming guitars and nervously messing up their lyrics. Back then he would have made fun of them, and maybe he does chuckle a little, but he gives them credit. He hasn't been on a stage in- oof, at least a year. Discounting karaoke, of course. He wonders what Disaster Master Quinn is up to these days.

The night ends, early enough for all the teens to go to bed, with a pretty tight Sunstroke Project cover on theramin. There is much clapping and whooping and thanking before everyone starts clearing out. Carmensita chugs the rest of her coffee, discreetly wiping her mouth on her sleeve. “Alright, let's pay our tabs and head upstairs. Who's feeling Mario Party?”

“You know I am,” Lucien smirks as they gather their things. “None of the car ones though, I hate that shit.”

Ernest loses the thread of the conversation because there's a hiss of static in his ears. He can't pay his tab. His chequing account is a negative number and he can't remember if their register takes credit or not but that's not an option either. He's too broke. To pay for a goddamn /tea./ God, why does he only clue into shit when it's too late?

The thought of asking them to pay makes him wanna puke, so he performs the maneuver that saved him from many a terrible college party: the Irish Goodbye.

The crowd makes it easy to slip away. He lopes through the parking lot and heads into the undeveloped no-man's land behind the softball field. He shuts off his phone, which any rational instinct would encourage him not to do. He's gonna take the long, long way home and- then what? Isn't that just the biggest fucking question of his life- and then what, you witless idiot?

The static does not stop as he hurries through the warm summer air, eventually cutting across the street and walking down the bay. His pulse is really high for no friggin' reason and he probably couldn't type a text if he needed to- wait, is this a panic attack? No, come on. He's too old to get on any of his dads' benefits. He can't be doing this. He can't, he can't-

A car drives up slowly beside him, and he has a split-second of facing his death before the window rolls down to reveal two annoyed, very familiar faces. “You live in my Dad's house, what the hell was your long-term plan with this?”

“Look, I'm sorry, I couldn't pay and I-” Ernest rakes a hand through his hair, pulling on his scalp. “I'm sorry I'm such a fuck-up, okay? I shouldn't have come out tonight, I'm no good to be around right now.”

Carmensita runs her tongue over her bottom lip. “You ditched us over a four-ninety-seven tab?”

“I called it.”

She scowls, undoes her seatbelt, and clambers out of the passenger door, stomping around to his side. “Give me your face, right now. C'mere-”

Ernest hunches his shoulders so she can reach, mostly out of confusion. She takes his cheeks in her warm hands and paps them with each word, like she's trying to wake up a drunk guy in a movie. “We're not hanging out with your wallet! We want to hang out with /you,/ if you'll stop! Being! Such! A! Dumbass!”

“Can you stop smacking my face?”

“Maybe,” Carmensita drops her hands after two more, crossing her arms. “Seriously though, not cool. What's gotten into you?”

“Dude, I forgot that I couldn't afford to buy a bagel, like how fucked am I?” Ernest scrubs his face, palms burning with his need for a shave. “Everything's so messed up right now. I feel like a complete waste of space.”

“Again with this?” Lucien makes an irritated noise from the car, leaning out the window. “Like you're the only one who's ever been broke. How much money do you think I had after college?”

“Why do you think I'm living over my dad's shop?” Carmensita tilts her head at him. “I know you're upset, but you're not on your own, for god's sake. I would have bought you that bagel anyway, you didn't need to freak out.”

“Guhhhh,” Ernest pushes the heel of one palm against his eye. “I'm sorry I'm such an idiot. I can barely fuckin' think right now.”

“Do you wanna go home or do you wanna play video games with us?” Lucien asks, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. “No judgment either way. But maybe decide quick, before some cops come by and get all up in our business.”

Ernest would really like to bury himself in all of his blankets but, in the interest of not continuing to screw up his personal relationships, he picks the right choice. “Video games, please.”

They collectively kick the CPU's ass at getting stars and Carmensita hugs him before he leaves, Lucien's taillights in the distance. “You're not a waste of space, okay? It'll get better, just don't let things get this bad again.”

He almost misses being the one to cheer her up. It's a shitty thing to miss, but at least he didn't go home feeling all squashed on the inside.

Ernest gets up the guts to call his Pop a few days later. He's totally cool about it, even though he sunk how much into that one room. Somehow that makes Ernest feel worse.

“Trust me, my credit in my early twenties was a /mess,/ I was really stupid with my money. It was bad. Like, scary bad. Your gramps flipped his lid when he saw my pile of bills on the table.”

“Mine's a mess too,” Ernest mumbles, knees folded up to his chest as he leans back against his headboard.

“Yeah, but it's more fixable than it looks. It'll just take time. If you owned a car or something that would be kinda rough, but hey, I turned it around, didn't I? Before I met your dad too, no way would he have dated pre-grad school me. Nuh-uh,” Pop laughs, a hiss-crack in his ear because he does this weird almost-silent laugh that Ernest makes fun of constantly. “Tell you what, I'll pay off your card so you're not getting those assholes calling you every day. Then you can focus on finding a job, I heard they have a youth program you'd still-”

“I'm sorry,” Ernest manages to wobble out, a big lump in his throat as the tears burn.

“What?” Pop's voice turns all anxious and concerned, which hurts even worse. “Hey, kiddo, it's alright. You don't have to be sorry. I know you were trying your best, it's really tough when you're starting out alone-”

“I'm so sorry,” Ernest hiccups, covering his face with his hand as he snots. “I can't pay you back and I probably never will and I'm gonna have to put Dad in a nursing home with cockroaches because they just slashed teacher pensions again and everything is so fucked /forever./”

“Ernest, Ernest, listen to me,” Pop's voice strains against the weak receiver of his phone. “Nothing is fucked, okay? No one's mad at you. We'll fix this, I promise. Ernest?”

It's a rough month, for sure. Pop comes to visit. Him and Dad have been really good at not-bitching-at-each-other since he crossed that adulthood threshold. Maybe it was child support that made them fight after all. Pop used to get these little digs into dad, telling him to quit and go into something with a future. Maybe him and money are just cursed or something.

He loses it again when they hug him at the same time. He's only gotten those at graduations and he's all out of those now. “We would do anything and everything for you, do you hear me?” Dad is halfway out of his lawn chair, the three of them on the back porch, having borrowed a little barbecue from Brian. “I'd rather have you here than starving in some apartment somewhere. Everything's going to be fine, mijo. I promise.”

“I'll bring you down for a visit whenever you want.” Pop assures him as he's leaving, hugging him again. It's so weird that he's taller than him now. “If you want to move, I'll help. But honestly, you might be better off here for a bit. Rent is going crazy in the city and it's not worth it.”

“How does a couple hours' drive make such a huge difference?” Ernest sniffs, shuffling in the driveway.

“I mean, I could explain but it's really boring.” He smiles and ruffles his hair. “You'll be alright, kiddo. Don't worry so much, okay?” Easier said than done, but it's well-meant. He accepts it.

He does qualify for extra help at the employment place, but unfortunately he has a humanities degree, which means no marketable skills. Which means part-time at the small bougie grocery store downtown, which is in fact a hell of a lot better than nothing.

“Excuse me.” An older woman clutching a plastic handbag strolls up to him while he's stocking shelves. “Do you have any of those sweet honey mustards?”

“No ma'am, sorry. We ran out.”

She narrows her beady eyes at him. “Why?”

Most of the time.

Carmensita's doing pretty well for herself between the Coffee Spoon and her piano lessons. Not move-into-her-own-place good, but she's got a nice little loft space over the shop. Sick prints up all over the walls, those fairy lights she's always liked, her keyboard set up beside her computer desk all tidy for when the kids come by. Ernest spends his off-hours googling potential side-hustles and making music for the first time in a while.

“-Practically everybody's stressed, yes!” Ernest snaps his fingers with one hand and runs his beats with the other. “But they press through the mess, bounce cheques, and wonder what's next!”

“In the heights! I buy my coffee and I go,” Carmensita sings clear as anything, laying into her keys. “Set my sights on only what I need to know...”

“Girl, how'd you get so good at that? Damn,” Ernest shakes his head after they stop recording. “It's like Mandy Gonzalez was right here.”

“Vocal coaching, son!” Carmensita grins, sticking out her thumb and pinky finger and twisting her wrist. “Taught me how to sing from the diaphraaaaaaagm.”

Ernest cracks up at the low note she hits, spinning around in her chair and staring at the plastic glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to the ceiling. “Hey, do you ever feel bad for being happy? Like, you're not supposed to be, or something?”

“Hell yeah, all the time,” Carmensita stretches, laying out on her secondhand piano bench and popping her back. “Like if I'm having a good day I get thinking, 'oh but if I was at X point, I could be doing Y.' I think I'm scared I'll get complacent or something.”

“Yeah,” Ernest sits up, catching his feet on the carpet. “But like, I don't know how long our whole generation's gonna be stuck like this. So if we can't enjoy this...”

“Oof, heavy stuff.” Carmensita swats at the bag of mini Oreos until he passes it to her, grabbing a handful himself. “This isn't so bad though. Who knows, maybe we'll look back with nostalgia goggles and miss it.”

“Yeah.” He settles back in the chair, toying with the music program on his aging laptop. “Maybe.”

Carmensita sits up, tugging her off-the-shoulder t-shirt back down where it had ridden up on her belly. “Wanna eat pot brownies and watch Bebop again?”

Ernest scoffs. “Is that even a question?”

By the time Pablo and Lucien come down for Thanksgiving Part One (there's always cliffhanger holidays with divorced parents, but it's not so bad anymore, it's just a part of it), his life has a routine. He's too grown to resent 'being another cog in the machine' in any significant way. Predictable income and free time is a blessing and a half and he's not giving it up unless he works his way up to something real good. Which will take time, and energy, and so, so much luck.

But right now he's got a favourite lunch and does his share of the chores (cleaning Damien's weird house only seems daunting, it just takes a lot of furniture polish and a big-ass feather duster). He sees his Pop as often as he can with him jetting all over the continent, texting when they're in different time zones and laughing about stupid coworker stories (his Pop's are more maddening, apparently higher salaries don't strain out the truly incompetent, somehow that's comforting, too).

He can pay for Coffee Spoon bagels now, coming to Carmensita's aid during lulls in her shifts. Both their schedules are pretty regular, so they exchange barely a message or two before coming to see each other at certain points in the week. With what pocket money they do have, they get concert tickets once or twice, go ice skating, and buy fries at the mall, wandering around the stores after dark and trying to pick out new versions of themselves. Mostly they just go home with small things they don't need and pricey chocolate bars they split. When she gets wicked cramps, he hits her up with aspirin and movies they've seen ten times. When he can't get out of bed, she sends him memes and cute dog videos.

Dad and Damien are gross as per usual, but they're also way less nosy than they used to be. It's weird to just take off for the day or night without any further questions. Though coming back is a different story.

“I got your text,” Hugo leans out of the study (yes, they have one, of course they do) when he hears Ernest's sock feet shuffling up the hallway. “What happened?”

“I don't know,” Ernest shrugs, unbuttoning his uniform shirt. “A sewer main burst while they were working on the parking lot. The fire department scooted everyone out of there pretty quick, it smelled awful. I had better get paid for the full shift.”

“You have a right to, you weren't the one driving the backhoe.” His dad grins, re-shelving a book before shutting the door. “On the bright side, unexpected free time is always a bonus.”

“It sure is, and I'm gonna use it to take a well-deserved nap.”

“Oh.” A beat while he fixes his expression. “Okay, I'll record that documentary for you.”

Ernest turns, hand on the ornate doorframe. “Is that on today?” Hugo's eager nod goes right between his ribs and he smiles. “Nah, I'll watch it with you. Naps mess up my sleep schedule anyway, make me all cranky in the morning.”

“As opposed to any other morning?”

“Rude,” he snorts while his dad chuckles. “I'll be down in a minute, okay? Just gotta get changed and stuff.”

“Okay.” Not five minutes into changing and checking his email, he gets a text.

HV: You want to order in for dinner? Two-for-one at the pizza place

HV: We can get those chicken bite things, I have a coupon :)

Ernest laughs, oddly reminded of coming home to Duchess after high school sleepovers. He sends a quick 'sure dad,' and takes some of his recycling down. They spend the evening in their boxers on the couch in the den, three of the four hairless cats Damien had adopted when they came through the shelter (he didn't last long post-Duchess once he had a taste of pet ownership) snuggled up beside and on top of them. It's not their first or last night spent this way.

He does quietly scream to the heavens at the mere suggestion of a girlfriend. “I'm a cashier- oh, sorry, 'customer service associate.' All I've got to offer someone right now is pocket lint and my winning personality.”

“But that is precisely what you should be offering in a relationship!” Damien insists, winding black tinsel up the staircase while Ernest does the same on the other side. “If wealth was a prerequisite, only the rich would fall in love.”

“I don't need to be rich, but I do need a little something to put in my dating profile, you know?” He's already down a few pegs courtesy of his 'no sex for me please' sexuality, but he won't bring that up now. Tis the season, and all that.

“You have much to include! You are in possession of many fine qualities,” Damien smiles at him, looking less vampire and more nerd with his hair up in a bun and his glasses on. His outfit is like Dickens and Mary Shelley had a weird baby, though. “Your father and I just think it would be nice if you had someone special in your life, that's all. We're not pressuring you to bring someone home for the holidays.”

“Well, that's appreciated,” Ernest ties off the tinsel, zipping up his hoodie again. What did thermostats ever do to fathers, anyway? “I'm just kind focusing on me right now. I'll get in a relationship when I'm in a better spot.”

“Ah, that is fair,” Damien grabs another handful of tinsel for the top banisters. “But love can happen upon you when you least expect it. Such was the case for me both times.”

Ernest had never decided if Damien getting sappy about his dead husband or his very-alive husband who is also Ernest's dad was worse, they might tie for first place.

EHV: Plz never let me become this gross n sentimental when I'm old plz

LB: You cry at Hamilton now and you've seen it so many fing times

EHV: ELIZA DESERVED BETTER GDI DON'T START W ME

CS: I WILL CRY AT ITS QUIET UPTOWN UNTIL THE DAY I DIE FIGHT ME SCRUB

EHV: YEAH THAT'S RIGHT

LB: Oh ffs I forgot this was the groupchat

Speaking of awkward sad times, this year's holidays are busy and bright and not as rushed as last year where he could barely visit anyone for more than a couple hours, but the same anniversary comes around. He's celebrating a third Christmas up at Damien's parents place over New Year's weekend, laughing it up while everyone is maybe too drunk, but he has a sixth sense when that text buzzes in.

CS: I wish missing someone didn't hurt so much :(

EHV: I know <3

CS: Dad's sad, but he's got Julian now

CS: I'm just by myself up in my old room, they're asleep already

EHV: Aw, shit. Do you want me to call you?

CS: No, you're with family. I'm fine

EHV: Everyone is tipsy and Dad is losing at trivial pursuit

CS: Okay then yes please <3

He makes his first appearance at open mic night in the cold and crisp new year. One technical glitch makes him nearly piss himself but it otherwise goes okay. Carmensita sings right after him, her dad on guitar and it's so frickin' good.

“God, you guys are so cool,” he says afterwards, spinning a bottle of Windex around his finger and taking Wild West-style aim at the glass in front of the baked goods.

“Glad I've still got it,” Mat grins, going back to counting the money. “You should do more of these, everyone was super into it. There's another place that does really good open mics out in the boonies, it's a cafe-arthouse thing.”

“You think so?” Ernest had immediately repressed all memory of his performance upon leaving the stage, it was a good coping technique.

“We should start a YouWatch channel!” Carmensita exclaims, as if for the first time, though she's been bugging him for weeks. “We'll do covers to get the subs, then post our own stuff! I bet we could get sponsors!”

“Mister Sella,” Ernest says very seriously. “Are you aware that your daughter is selling out to the man?”

'Sita hits him with a broom, but he does decide to take the leap. Not like starting a channel takes a lot of upfront capital investment, exactly. They do pool money for one good mic, and figure they'll work their way up if it turns out to be worth it. They pick songs from their early teens to indulge their own and others' guilty pleasure fix, and they do weird remixes of things that aren't songs, and he convinces Carmensita to do tag videos. It's fun, and some people like it. Not a ton, but hey, maybe someday.

They only complain on days they're not recording, not wanting to wreck their voices. This time they're slumped on Ernest's bed, him whinging continuously after his first attempt at online dating ended in utter failure, therefore he should give up and never try again, right? Less money on dating, more money to eventually adopt dogs?

“Ernest, I want you to try something.” Carmensita reaches over and covers his eyes, her voice only a little exasperated. “Envision what you want in a relationship. Dad taught me this, I used it to figure out where I wanted to go for college.”

“Okay. Does it work, or is it some hokey bullshit?”

“Quit being rude and humour me, dammit.”

“Alright, alright,” he laughs, feeling her well-manicured thumb jab his cheek. He wets his lips while he thinks for a moment. “Uh, I wanna be with someone who's funny and nice, fun to be around.”

“Okay, can we get a little more depth than that?”

“Give me a second here, woman,” he snorts. “I want- someone who's chill, who likes some of the stuff I like- not everything, but we gotta have stuff to do together, you know?” Carmensita hums. “I want- I really want someone I can build a future with. I don't wanna just play around, y'know? I want someone responsible- heh, maybe not too responsible. But someone I can trust, someone I can see myself having kids with.”

“Woah, you want kids-plural now?”

“Well not a whole bunch, but two would be nice. They can play with each other- anyway,” Ernest gulps, strangely caught up in the thought process. “I want someone who when I look at her- I just want all the good stuff in the world for her. She's going places and she's talented- I want someone who I really get, who gets me back. When people talk about marrying their best friend, that's- that's what I want. Someone who- accepts me, and we can be ourselves around each other, always.”

They're quiet a moment, Carmensita's hand still on his face. She takes it away slowly and smiles softly. “So, you want what you have with me, but with kissing?”

Ernest blanks for a solid thirty seconds before raising his finger. “Okay, first of all, when did you get so smooth?”

Carmensita laughs, loud and cute, sweeping some loose curls off her forehead and looking at him with these eyes- he's never seen her look at him like that until now. Or maybe he was just that clueless. “Is that really all you want to ask me?”

Ernest swallows, loud enough to hear it, sitting up a little straighter. “Can I- kiss you?”

“I don't know, can you?”

He groans outright, dropping his head on her shoulder while she giggles. “One of these days, 'Sita, one of these days.”

She smells really nice this close, maybe it's her shampoo? It's damn good, whatever it is. Her hands end up on his shoulders, not pressing, just holding him. He lifts his head and god, that little moment of eye contact before they both lean forward-

First kisses are not usually perfect, but he's willing to call this one close enough. She's warm and soft beneath his lips. His arms slip around her waist and it's like she was made to fit against him. He outright sighs when they part, kissing her nose just to hear her laugh again.

“Are you-” He can't quite find his words right now, his mind cycling through all the new and so very nice stimuli his senses are taking in. Carmensita's always been beautiful to him but he never thought, never let himself- “Do you- are you sure you wanna do this? I can't- I really like you, but I don't think I'll ever be able to do the physical stuff. You deserve-”

She presses a finger to his lips and he silences himself immediately, distracted by the light of her eyes. “There's nothing I want that online shopping with discreet shipping can't provide. None of that 'you deserve better' crap. I want you, if you want me back, then we should keep kissing and see where it takes us.”

Ernest works his jaw for a few moments, then nods. “Yeah, I can get behind that train of thought.”

Carmensita's laugh as he pulls her in for more smooches is the sweetest sound he's ever heard.

They end up cuddling up and falling asleep together- hahaha an asexual sleeping with someone on the first date, hahaha, puns and stuff -a bonus of neither of them having morning shifts the next day and Carmensita not having anyone expecting her back at home. He wakes up before she does, spooned up behind her, all their clothes rumpled, the blankets cocooned around them. He kisses the nape of her neck and sighs. He feels content, for the first time in a while.

The softest of knocks precedes the door creaking open. “Hey, Ernest, do you want- /oh/.”

The door shuts quickly, rousing Carmensita and making Ernest groan. “So much for keeping quiet about it.”

“Were we going to?” She yawns, sitting up and stretching. “Also, I'm bringing my silk pillowcases or we're only sleeping at my place. How do you live like this?”

“I dunno, I'm a mess.” He laughs and sits up, a tentative hand on her back. “I just- I'm scared. We've been friends for so long, I don't want to risk it going badly.”

“But if we don't risk it going badly, we also don't risk it going well.” She clumsily boops his nose, smiling dopily at him. “Guess which outcome I have my money on?”

“Girl, what money?” He laughs when she jabs him in the stomach. He leans in for a kiss after a moment, realizing that they can do that now, and smooches her cheek gladly. “So, if the Dads know, that means we're officially an 'us.'”

“We are.” She grins and kisses his cheek back. “I like being an us, it's pretty great so far.”

“It is.” He grins back, feeling like he can't stop. Shit, it's really happening. Is he in love? Is that an okay word to use after literally one very unexpected day? Probably not out loud.

He walks her downstairs, and they whisper-laugh a few walk-of-shame jokes before she heads out in her poofy pink coat, leaving him alone with the giddy feeling in his gut. In the dining room, Dad and Damien are doing maybe the worst acting job he's ever seen. “Are you two gonna make a big deal out of this?”

“Make a big deal out of what?” Damien inquires with convincing innocence, frying pan and spatula in hand.

“Yes, is there something we should make a big deal out of?” Hugo smiles, legitimately doing the newspaper crossword like he's a goddamn cartoon character.

Ernest sighs and drops into his chair, accepting several pancakes from Damien. “We literally just started- dating, I guess. No wedding bells, no grandbabies, nothing crazy yet, so please relax.”

“You know we're not like that.”

“Certainly, I'm not my mother.” Damien chuckles, almost unconsciously rubbing Hugo's robe-covered arm while they eat. So gross, but also goals.

“But, out of curiosity,” Hugo teasingly elbows him. “Did you kiss her yet?”

The dads laugh while Ernest howls. He'd text his Pop for backup, but he will get the exact same shit in different wording. He pulls out his phone and texts Lucien instead.

EHV: Hey Carmensita and I are dating just FYI

LB: About gd time, you've been heart eyes at her for literal years

CS: What

CS: Lucien why would you not tell me this

CS: I COULD HAVE SAVED SO MUCH TIME >:(

EHV: Oh shit group chat again

LB: Let's rename these things plz

EHV: Sorry babe <3

CS: Np hon ;*

LB: And here I am, third wheeling it again

EHV: You are basically married stfu

LB: That does not make this better

CS: Ladies ladies, you're both pretty

EHV: Sita knows whats uppppp

LB: Finishing BNHA this weekend y/n?  

CS: Y, obvs

EHV: Also Y, I'm off at 7 don't watch ahead

LB: Don't walk so slow and we won't

EHV: Eat a dick

CS: G2g, love you guys

EHV: Love ya too

LB: <3

LB: Also, straaaaaaaaaaight

EHV: Fuckin really dude

LB: Someone has to

LB: Tell Dad I'm coming for dinner tonight

EHV: Will do, bye weeb

LB: Cya loser

[moonlitgleek]

@solareclairart reblogged this post and added:

I disagree strongly with a lot of this criticism. In book dorne, marriage was not a necessity. All the sand snakes are considered true daughters under dorne law.  Targaryans also married multiple wives often. It was northern law that forbade unmarried women and bastard born. I think Rhaegar never abandoned Elia. I think she believed the prophecy as well. I truly believe that he married Lyanna to pacify northern lords. Elia is a daughter of the sun. Lyanna was a winter wolf. Together, they created ice and fire. I believe now it will be Targaryen, Stark, and Lannister. The gold lion standing in as sun, snow for ice, and all three with varying amounts of dragon blood. This is also true of Elia who had weaker Targaryen lineage. I think the prophecy didn’t fulfill before because there wasn’t strong enough dragon blood in Elia. If Joanna Lannister was impregnated with the mad king, all three would have a dragon father and lineage to the first men and children of the forest in the men.

Oh boy. There is a lot to unpack here. I’m gonna break it down because this is a rather stunning mix of outright incorrect information, some breathtaking stereotyping and racist misconceptions, and wrong theories. No, really, they are wrong. Tyrion is not a Targ.

Let’s take this from the top.

In book dorne, marriage was not a necessity. All the sand snakes are considered true daughters under dorne law.  

What do you think Dornish law is exactly? Because literally the only difference between Dorne and the rest of Westeros is that Dorne employs absolute primogeniture (and a couple of rights like the right to keep their princely title.) That’s it. Law in Dorne is not at all different from other regions in Westeros, especially when we’re talking about matters of marriage and heirs because that stuff affects the line of succession which is crucial in a feudal society.

The context you’re looking for wrt the treatment of bastards is cultural (and social), not legal. Dorne is very different in the way they treat bastards, that’s true, but they are still not giving them the same legal rights as the trueborn. I have no idea where you got the idea that the Sand Snakes are "considered true daughters under dorne law”. Yeaaah, no. That’s patently not true. The Sand Snakes might have gotten raised akin to trueborn children, but so have Jon Snow, and no one is arguing that he was considered a true son under the law. The Sand Snakes are bastards, hence the Sand part. They are not considered trueborn. They are acknowledged as Oberyn’s daughters and treated with respect as the daughters of a prince of House Martell, and as Dorne generally does not stigmatize bastards, but they do not have the same legal rights as trueborn children: they do not bear their father’s name, they are not considered princesses of House Martell, they do not have the right to inherit, etc. There is nothing in Dornish law that says otherwise, or that gives illegitimate offspring any legal rights.

More importantly, the idea that marriage isn’t a necessity in Dorne is ludicrous. Whatever on earth gave you that impression? No, let me guess: Oberyn Martell. Fandom just loves to take the example of Oberyn and stereotype the entire Dornish culture based on him. Oberyn wasn’t married so no one had to get married in Dorne. Oberyn made a casual comment about sleeping with others while he was in a committed relationship with Ellaria so all the Dornish are accustomed to cheating on their significant others and don’t care if they have paramours on the side (not that Oberyn was cheating. Some are just fond of ignoring the fact that he repeatedly made comments about “sharing” with Ellaria. Ellaria consented. Ellaria participated. They invited people to their bed.) Gee, I wonder why people act as if Oberyn is the representative of the entire Dornish culture, even going to unprecedented measures to ignore the actual text because “well, Oberyn did X” fit their racist stereotypes better. Stop treating a person of color as the sole representative of his culture, and stop treating the only non-white culture that actually has a proper presence in the series as a monolith society.

(Grumbles at GRRM and his skewered presentation of the Dornish and heavy use of the exotic-erotic trope. You haven’t helped matters any, George. Good lord.)

But let’s talk about Dorne and about Oberyn. Dorne has a positive attitude towards sex, culturally permits having paramours and does not frown upon children born out of wedlock, but that does not mean that having paramours is the rule of the land in Dorne, or that it’s the baseline convention. It’s just allowed without derision or scorn. Dorne is a feudal principality, they adhere to the Faith of the Seven just like the majority of Westeros, they are governed by only slightly different inheritance laws, and the difference has nothing to do with the status of trueborn vs bastard children. Legitimacy is crucial to the integrity of line of succession and to the laws of inheritance, but you just randomly decided that nah, marriage is optional there? Okay, care to explain this:

Arianne Martell had grown up expecting that one day she would wed some great lord of her father's choosing. That was what princesses were for, she had been taught . . . though, admittedly, her uncle Oberyn had taken a different view of matters. "If you would wed, wed," the Red Viper had told his own daughters. "If not, take your pleasure where you find it. There's little enough of it in this world. Choose well, though. If you saddle yourself with a fool or a brute, don't look to me to rid you of him. I gave you the tools to do that for yourself."

Or how the text disproves the idea that there is absolutely no difference between the Sand Snakes and trueborn Martells, or generally between bastards and trueborn in Dorne.

The freedom that Prince Oberyn allowed his bastard daughters had never been shared by Prince Doran's lawful heir. Arianne must wed; she had accepted that. Drey had wanted her, she knew; so had his brother Deziel, the Knight of Lemonwood. Daemon Sand had gone so far as to ask for her hand. Daemon was bastard-born, however, and Prince Doran did not mean for her to wed a Dornishman.

Oberyn took a different approach with his own life and his own daughters. He made a decision concerning his life and he encouraged his daughters to do the same. He gave them the freedom to wed if they wished to but not the expectation that they would. But Oberyn was presented by the text as somewhat of a maverick, a nonconformist even within Dorne itself. He could afford to do that because he was not heir to Dorne and there was little chance that he’d ever inherit. He did not have a responsibility to provide trueborn heirs for House Nymeros Martell, and so he had significant freedom due to that fact. But heirs have a responsibility to marry and produce lawful heirs. Plus, Oberyn is one person, why is his example the one people are laser-focused on but they ignore Doran and Elia, the Unnamed Princess of Dorne and Nymeria of Ny Sar, Mariah and Maron Martell, Arianne, Quentyn and Trystane, and the countless trueborn Dornish characters we met over the course of the story? Why did all these people marry if marriage was not a necessity?

Marriage is as important in Dorne as in the other regions in Westeros with both religious and legal weight. Dorne is just another region in Westeros that is still governed by Westerosi convention, customs and religion, they just have some of their own inspired by the Rhoynish. The social treatment of bastards is infinitely better in Dorne than outside it, but their legal and political standing remains the same, the distinction between bastards and trueborn through surnames remains the same, even some restrictions remain the same. Daemon Sand can be a lover to Arianne but he can never be her husband. His social and political standing would never allow it. Likewise, I suspect the reason Oberyn did not marry Ellaria, his lover of 14 years that he evidently loved very much, was because of her bastard-birth, because even princes can only bend the rules so much. 

Enough with fanon myths that bastardize the information we have about Dorne and turn it into these weird arguments that are always used to justify Rhaegar’s actions. Not that I can see how "marriage was not a necessity in Dorne” explains anything because Elia was Rhaegar’s wife and the mother of his two children, the Iron Throne was her children’s inheritance, or do the Dornish not care about inheritance as well? And if you mean to imply the old “Elia was okay with it because she is Dornish” argument, fuck that noise.

Targaryans also married multiple wives often. 

Yes, that is correct, though often is not the word I’d use for two recorded polygamous marriages. Nevertheless, that means there is a precedent to a Targaryen taking multiple wives, which I think is probably what Rhaegar proposed to Lyanna to get her to go with him willingly (as much as the action can be described as willing because there are still consent issues at play here). I think that Rhaegar and Lyanna probably wed in front of a heart tree on the Isle of Faces. That, however, does not mean that the marriage is either valid or legal.

We need to look at the historical context of Targaryen polygamy before we discuss Rhaegar’s ability to take another wife to understand the chances that the realm would accept that marriage. The first thing to note about this subject is that polygamy was unconventional even when Aegon the Conqueror did it, before he started his conquest of Westeros.

It had long been the custom amongst the dragonlords of Valyria to wed brother to sister, to keep the bloodlines pure, but Aegon took both his sisters to bride. By tradition, he was expected to wed only his older sister, Visenya; the inclusion of Rhaenys as a second wife was unusual, though not without precedent. 

Both polygamy and incest are sins in the eyes of the Faith of the Seven, the majority religion in Westeros. The Faith tolerated both in the case of Aegon on account of his dragons whose prowess was just recently demonstrated in the Conquest. As GRRM says:

... the extent to which the Targaryen kings could defy convention, the Faith, and the opinions of the other lords decreased markedly after they no longer had dragons. If you have a dragon, you can have as many wives as you want, and people are less likely to object.      

Aegon had converted to the Faith of the Seven and taken measures to assimilate to Westerosi culture, winning him the support of the Starry Sept. However, upon Aegon’s death, the Faith showed that they would not tolerate the same practices from his son(s). 

Maegor shocked the realm in 39 AC by announcing that he had taken a second wife—Alys of House Harroway—in secret. He had wed her in a Valyrian ceremony officiated by Queen Visenya for want of a septon willing to wed them. The public outcry was such that Aenys was finally forced to exile his brother.

Maegor’s bigamous marriage to Alys Harroway was the start of the rift between the Faith and the crown, one that did not heal despite Aenys’ attempts, and was later compounded by Aenys himself marrying his two eldest to each other, ultimately leading to the Faith denouncing the Targaryens. The Faith Militant uprising during Maegor’s reign followed as his continuing polygamous marriages raised the tension and Maegor escalated the situation (because he is Maegor) by blatant tyranny and brutal burning of thousands of Warrior’s Sons and Poor Fellows.

So the history tied to Targaryen polygamy is dark and bloody. Maegor was the last recorded Targaryen polygamists, bar some rumors that Daemon Blackfyre meant to take his half-sister Daenerys as a second wife after his planned seizing of the throne from Daeron II, but the truth of the matter died with Daemon himself on the Redgrass field. While Jaehaerys I’s conciliatory efforts succeeded in defanging the Faith after the bloody conflict with Maegor, and won the Targaryens the exemption that permitted them their incestuous marriages, polygamy was never practiced again. Which means that the precedent that Rhaegar may have intended to invoke 1) happened over 200 years ago when the Targaryens had the undeniable advantage of dragons on their side, and 2) sparked a rebellion that resulted in the death of thousands, and thus got heavily entwined in the minds of the Westerosi with the tyranny of Maegor. Which utterly complicates any attempt to get a marriage to Lyanna recognized.

Now, we can argue that Rhaegar planned to convince, pressure and\or bribe the High Septon to declare a second marriage valid (though we have no evidence to suggest so, and though getting the High Septon to approve a post-fact marriage done in front of a heart tree would be extremely unlikely indeed), but in the absence of such a legalization, Rhaegar and Lyanna’s “marriage” would remain illegal and invalid in the eyes of the Faith. And no, that crap on the show where the High Septon was able to Apparate to Dorne and back before anyone noticed his absence, and where he approved something that would bring significant consequences to both himself and the realm so damn easily, is not happening. That’s preposterous.

It was northern law that forbade unmarried women and bastard born.

You seem to think that the cultural divide that separates the North and Dorne from the rest of the realm means that the North and Dorne are governed by alien laws that are completely removed from the rest of Westeros when the truth is that the differences are not that grand or that many, and most of them are cultural with no legal bearing.

Anyways.

This is not something that is unique to the North. Bastards are stigmatized everywhere in Westeros, with the exception of Dorne; they are perceived as treacherous and untrustworthy and a perpetual danger to their trueborn siblings’ inheritance, the girls are assumed to be lusty and wanton and easy. This ain’t a mark of those “Northern savages”, literally every region in Westeros, bar Dorne, thinks that way. The patriarchy, naturally, absolves the men, chalking it up to them “having needs” while literally teaching women to expect their husbands to father bastards. However, a noblewoman who loses her maidenhead before marriage or, god forbid, bears a bastard is swiftly punished, looked down upon and often has to marry so far beneath her station because the scandal of bearing a bastard tanked her hand’s worth. Delena Florent had to marry a household knight after bearing a bastard son to Robert Baratheon. Lollys Stokeworth fell pregnant after being gang-raped but in a rather remarkable pout of victim-blaming, she was derided for it, and was married off to the lowborn sellsword Bronn. Hoster Tully forcibly aborted Lysa to prevent the news about her lost maidenhead and her pregnancy from getting out. Jon Arryn’s niece, the daughter of Alys Arryn and Elys Waynwood, joined the Silent Sisters after she was seduced by a sellsword and her bastard died in infancy. None of these women are Northern.

As for bastards, the prevailing social convention for them is to be sent away, if they are even acknowledged in first place. Jon Snow and the Sand Snakes are the exception, not the rule. This is a story where Mya Stone, the king’s bastard, spends her time guiding mules in the Vale in service to House Royce of the Gates of the Moon. Her half-brother Edric Storm had a much better fate being raised as a ward of Renly in Storm’s End but that’s because his mother is a noblewoman (the aforementioned Delena Florent) and because his conception was a public affair since Robert deflowered Delena in Stannis’ marriage bed. Falia Flowers, bastard daughter of Lord Humfrey Hewett of Oakenshield, was made a servant to her half-sisters and her father’s wife. Even when the bastards are relatively treated well or belong to Great Houses, we still see the prevailing social stigma in how Sybelle Spicer, herself derided for descending from upjumped merchants as she is the granddaughter of a spice trader and an Essosi maegi, was thoroughly disgusted at the idea of marrying her son to Joy Hill, bastard daughter of Gerion Lannister. And these are all noble bastards, claimed or at least acknowledged by their noble parent. 

The prejudice against bastards is institutional in Westeros, supported by holy scripture and widely spread. The nobility frowns upon bastards and regards them with suspicion, and the Faith preaches about their ill-make. Here’s what the Faith of the Seven, the majority religion in Westeros, says about bastardy and even legitimized bastards as told by the would-be King Aegon V Targaryen:

"The old High Septon told my father that king's laws are one thing, and the laws of the gods another," [Egg] said stubbornly. "Trueborn children are made in a marriage bed and blessed by the Father and the Mother, but bastards are born of lust and weakness, he said. King Aegon decreed that his bastards were not bastards, but he could not change their nature. The High Septon said all bastards are born to betrayal . . . Daemon Blackfyre, Bittersteel, even Bloodraven. Lord Rivers was more cunning than the other two, he said, but in the end he would prove himself a traitor, too. The High Septon counseled my father never to put any trust in him, nor in any other bastards, great or small." 

Tell me again how it’s Northern law that bans bastards.

I think Rhaegar never abandoned Elia. I think she believed the prophecy as well. 

Rhaegar left Elia in her sickbed, shortly after she nearly died birthing Aegon, to go pursue Lyanna, and that’s after publicly humiliating her and dealing a hit to her political worth in the eyes of the biggest possible gathering of lords. I don’t think he considered that Aerys could recall her and the children to King’s Landing but that’s, at best, a terrible oversight on his part since he knew fully well that his father was paranoid and fearful of what he, Rhaegar, might do. Rhaegar drew Aerys’ eyes to the Starks at Harrenhal then went and caused a political crisis by disappearing with Lyanna. It was a given that Aerys would be quick to seek an insurance against his wayward son who disappeared to who-knows-where doing who-knows-what and conveniently left his wife and children behind on Dragonstone within the Mad King’s reach, the same Mad King who already disdained Elia and her “Dornish-smelling” daughter, and regarded Dorne with suspicion for the heck of it. Perfect plan. Two thumbs up, Rhaegar.

I continue to be bewildered as to where the belief that Elia believed in the prophecy comes from. She knew of the prophecy but we have no indication that she believed it or was willing to risk her own children for it. Why on earth would she do that? What shred of evidence do we have to suggest this? I mean, if Elia really did believe the prophecy, shouldn’t Oberyn have at least heard about it? Oberyn and Elia were as close as twins and she trusted him implicitly. He was present at Harrenhal and bristled at the public insult to his sister. He was still (rightfully) bristling at Rhaegar 15 years later. But if Elia knew, wouldn’t she have tried to convince Oberyn of the validity of the prophecy, or at the very least indicated that she was alright with what Rhaegar had done? Wouldn’t she cite the prophecy to convince her brother to let it go? Wouldn’t she have tried to use her connections to find Rhaegar a more appropriate place for Lyanna than the Tower of Joy, considering this was her own kingdom he was taking Lyanna to? Wouldn’t she, at the very least, know fully well that Aegon was the Prince who was Promised and thus needn’t ask Rhaegar for a song for him?

I hate that argument, that unfounded assumption that of course Elia believed in the prophecy just because Rhaegar did. People generally do not buy into legends about a zombie apocalypse and prophetic figures and dragons returning that easily, especially since the entire Targaryen dynasty was nearly wiped out chasing that dream. No one was going to put stock in long lost lore and prophetic dreams and obscure scrolls after that, not without compelling evidence. Why would Elia be okay with being publicly humiliated and put, along with her children, on the line for a prophecy? Why would she be cool with Rhaegar carrying off a teenager to use as an incubator for a savior? Why does that argument even exists? ffs.

 I truly believe that he married Lyanna to pacify northern lords. 

This has got to be a joke! Please tell me this is a joke!

Dude, Rhaegar vanished with Lyanna for months. He made a mess and left the Starks to deal with the fallout, left them with no choice but to go to Aerys, then returned after Aerys killed over half a dozen nobles, including the Lord Paramount of the North and his heir, only to take up arms against Northern lords. How did you arrive at “pacify the Northern lords” from that? The guy carried off a daughter of House Stark to the other side of the continent to impregnate her. He defied convention and every chivalric rule and publicly besmirched her honor and that of House Stark by pretty much framing her as a royal mistress at Harrnehal. He created a political crisis and fled without sparing two thoughts to the consequences. He declared for his father and took up arms against the rebels knowing fully well that his father committed a crime, and being more than willing to kill the people who were injured by his and his father’s actions so he could retain his crown. What part of that even hints at an attempt for conciliation?

I believe now it will be Targaryen, Stark, and Lannister. The gold lion standing in as sun, snow for ice, and all three with varying amounts of dragon blood. This is also true of Elia who had weaker Targaryen lineage. I think the prophecy didn’t fulfill before because there wasn’t strong enough dragon blood in Elia. If Joanna Lannister was impregnated with the mad king, all three would have a dragon father and lineage to the first men and children of the forest in the men.

Tyrion is not a secret Targaryen. Tyrion is not a secret Targaryen. TYRION IS NOT A SECRET TARGARYEN. GRRM himself said that third head of the dragon needn’t have Targaryen blood. Kill that theory with wildfire and throw the ashes from the Hightower. The narrative is not going to make Tywin Lannister correct in his rejection of Tyrion as his son, neither is it validating his ableism and abuse or handing him his heart’s desire posthumously. Tywin wanted nothing more than for Tyrion to not be his blood, and the narrative isn’t giving it to him. The point of the story is that Tyrion is Tywin’s son and how he has to struggle to define who he is outside of his father’s brutal legacy, how he has to reject the Lannister ideology and legacy of blood and revenge to turn his attention to the true fight in the North. Tyrion being a Targaryen undermines his story, just as Jon being legitimate undermines his.

And enough with the stuff about Elia. She didn’t have enough Targaryen blood! She couldn’t have a third child for the prophecy! The only thing I see in these arguments is an insistence to imply that Elia was somehow lacking and that it was her that prevented the fulfillment of the prophecy. What a load of crap. You do realize that you’re buying into Cersei’s and Jon Connington’s rhetoric about Elia, correct? That you’re adopting their ableist and racist view of her and treating it as a fact, building a theory on the implication that Elia simply was not enough. Don’t be Cersei, don’t be Jon Connington. Be better.

It does not matter how “strong” Elia’s Targaryen blood was or wasn’t, the prophecy wasn’t going to come true with her children anyway..... because Rhaegar got it wrong. That’s the whole point; Rhaegar understood everything about this prophecy wrong. Aegon was not the Prince who was Promised. Rhaenys wasn’t one of the heads of the dragons. The three heads of the dragon aren’t even siblings, and not all of them are Targaryens. This has nothing with the potency of Elia’s Targaryen blood (and fyi, not even the current Targaryens have that much Valyrian blood anyway). The fact of the matter is that Aegon and Rhaenys couldn’t fulfill the prophecy no more than Rhaegar or Viserys could, simply because they weren’t the figures described in it. It had nothing to do with how much Targaryen blood they had, or how strong it was. I mean, Rhaegar and Viserys had as much Targ blood as Dany, why weren’t they two of the heads of the dragon?

Oh, and just for the record, Rhaenys and Aegon did have First Men blood, through Betha Blackwood and Dyanna Dayne , Rhaegar’s great grandmother, and great great grandmother respectively. That magical genetic makeup of Targaryen\First Men blood you’re talking about? Yup, they had it too. They also had more Targaryen blood than Jon.  

[playeroneplayertwo]

We Got Too Much (AquaSphere)

Point salad brain burnin’ metaphor mixin’ bad mother$%@#! 

A first impression.

AquaSphere (2014) Designed by Stefan Feld Art by Dennis Lohausen Published by Tasty Minstrel Games (in the US)

Asleep in the Desert (Some Background Information)

Stefan Feld, for being one of the preeminent Eurogame designers of the day, still often finds himself the target of attacks from tabletop gamers who prefer more than a skin-deep theme. He may have games about such varied and exciting things like jockeying for the attentions of a moon priestess, currying favor and fulfilling tasks handed down to you from Greek deities by a soothsayer, or leading your people through a brutally bad year in ancient China, but Stefan Feld’s games are generally held up as the pinnacle of The Dry Euro. A more generous opinion would probably be that Feld’s designs emphasize substance over style, but rare is this case made on his behalf.

In this house, at least, we certainly don’t mind how bone dry some of these games are. And yes, make no mistake they are dry. In fact, my first Feld purchase wasn’t solely driven by its bargain basement price–what a deal, but rather in an effort to really see what people meant when they talked about a dry Euro. We’d played lots of dice-rollers and card games, as well as a handful of more modern mashups of mechanics–games that bridged Ameritrash conflict and randomness with crunchier strategy. We had not, however, really played a straight up Euro, which is what lead me to purchase arguably one of Feld’s first bonafide classics, Notre Dame (2007).

Very soon, it was apparent what we’d been missing.

Swimming in Your Ocean (The Feld Design)

Board games are built from mechanics (or mechanisms, if you prefer). A fairly comprehensive list can be found here, but just a few examples are worker placement, rondel, negotiation, dice rolling, area majority/influence, or racing. As I said, these are functionally the building blocks from which games emerge. An effective game is some amalgamation of a small number of these, tied together by a theme and aimed at a common goal or victory condition for the players to pursue. 

Feld’s designs are notoriously busy. While he rarely designs games that are considered “heavy,” he’s often criticized for games that appear as though everything but the kitchen sink was included in the design. For example, in Feld’s Trajan (2011), Board Game Geek lists the included mechanics as area movement, card drafting, hand management, mancala, rondel, and set collection. There are a multitude of excellent games that are designed using any one of these mechanics only.

While, on paper, the kitchen sink may be thrown into his games, in actuality the gameplay is a different beast. In general, we take a minute to learn how to play a Feld game, but this is usually due more to the wide variety of options and ways in which you can gain points rather than how complex the overall experience is. More often than not, Stefan Feld’s games offer players a wide variety of methods with which points can be earned, explaining the creation of the very Feldian term “points salad.” There are points to be had everywhere, and the question is no longer how to get points, but how to get points efficiently.

The combination of many mechanics, many methods of gaining points, and skinny theme have combined to make Feld games easy targets for criticism. Ultimately, it depends on where you’re coming from. If you like games that offer options, variable strategies, and myriad choices, Feld games are for you. If you prefer streamlined and thematic games, the odds are strong that you’ll have a hard time connecting with these games. More often than not, while I find the designs fascinating in how the multiple mechanisms interact, it still does feel mechanical. Rare is it that the individual game mechanics will “fade away” into the experience of playing or narrative presented by theme. You’ll always feel the mechanical nature of his games. But that’s okay. The satisfaction here comes from the puzzle of working the machine.

Six Four Days at the Bottom of the Ocean (AquaSphere as Feld)

For a frame of reference, we own five Stefan Feld designs: In the Year of the Dragon (2007), Notre Dame (2007), Bora Bora (2013), AquaSphere (2014), and Castles of Burgundy: The Card Game (2016). Before you ask, we purchased the Castles card game because it is significantly cheaper than the board game and, by all accounts, provides a very similar experience. Of these five designs, they all can be described as both a kitchen sink of mechanisms and point salad. At the same time, they all have a certain polished feel. My above description of Feld seems to read as “his games are Frankensteined abominations of mechanics!” but that’s misleading. Yes, they are hammered together, but that polish is still unmistakable. We’ve played plenty of other games that feel like Feld, but they usually get a little lost in some labyrinth of rules exceptions often missing from Feld’s generally clean designs.

That being said, AquaSphere is the heaviest of our Feld games, complete with its fair share of exceptions, and strategically this may be one of the heaviest games I can think of. I want to reemphasize that word “strategically,” because while teaching this intimidated me, Kathleen was not actually intimidated learning it. For some reason, the circular board (seen up above) feels like a lot to take it, but it’s really just six pods made up of seven rooms repeated in varying arrangements.

Played over four rounds, AquaSphere is about, you guessed it: scientists working in an underwater aqua sphere. On your turn, you’ll do one of two things: program a bot or use a programmed bot. Using a bot is essentially the same thing as “taking an action,” meaning it will take at least two turns to simply do an action. That two-turn process of taking an action is merely one way in which the game’s strategy handcuffs you. Often in points salad games, there is a limiting factor in what you can do (eg dice placement’s reliance on what your dice facings are), but in AquaSphere, there are many handcuffs. Not only are all actions two steps, but the game is based around a programming board, dictating which sequence of actions you’ll be able to do. As you progress forward on this board, your path will cut you off from certain actions. The board looks like this (image courtesy of BGG user lordalatar):

As you program bots and then deploy them across the station, you’ll be using them to fight for control over each of the six pods. At the same time, you’re working to add new lab sections to your own personal lab area, deploy submarines, and fight off the growing hoard of octopods that threaten to take over the whole joint.

I can’t even begin to really teach this game via writing without getting totally derailed, so I absolutely recommend watching Rodney Smith’s Watch It Played for AquaSphere. At the end of each round, one of four total intermediate scorings will take place. Check out the individual player board:

Scoring aids are listed on the right side. The top spiral notepad is intermediate scoring, and the bottom clipboard is end-game scoring. Those lightbulbs are the symbol for POINTS. See? point salad. Plenty of ways to bring those points in.

Again, I’m not going to go in-depth on how to play, nor will I talk about strategy, as this is merely a first impressions post, but I have to say that of Feld’s designs, this was the hardest to get my hands around. At first, I wasn’t even sure what I was doing when we first started. I had to get to an end-of-round intermediate scoring to even see what I should be focusing on. Area control is very important here, but as you grown your influence, those pesky octopods will become a real problem. Should you fight them off or build your lab? Or, perhaps more importantly, get those subs out? But without working on picking up time markers, you won’t be able to get the high cost submarines out.

Many of Feld’s designs revolve around the idea that, on your turn, you need to do 10 things, but you only have the ability to do two or three. AquaSphere presents players with this dilemma in spades. Perhaps because of this game’s baked-in difficulties, AquaSphere seems to have struggled very much to find an audience. 

Beyond the Sea (Our Bottom Line on Feld & AquaSphere)

Where Castles of Burgundy is one of the most popular games on Board Game Geek, AquaSphere seems to be known as Feld’s “bargain bin” game. After Tasty Minstrel’s lovely US release and The Dice Tower’s subsequent negative review, it seems many players passed on this, which is rough, but unfortunately understandable. This game manages to be both complicated and complex in play. Additionally, forcing players to plan very far ahead tends to alienate the idea of “casual play,” and AquaSphere absolutely requires long term planning. I waved at so many points as they passed me by during our first play. At one point, Kathleen had written her entire strategy for a round out on a nearby legal pad.

Feld’s popularity in the hobby is unmistakable, but his design philosophy and aesthetic seem to be polarizing. And when you introduce a game that is overly demanding of its players, a design can take another step in the direction of alienating players who don’t live for the puzzle. There’s a reason that Castles of Burgundy is his most popular game. As Feld’s games get heavier, they become much more niche, but that same logic can be applied to any designer, right?

For the record, I think Stefan Feld’s games are remarkable. There is a polish here that you don’t even notice until it’s missing. So many Euro designers build complex, mechanically heavy games, and unfortunately, the smoothed edges of Feld’s designs become so much more evident when you play a game that’s all sharp edges.

That being said, I am of two minds on AquaSphere. In one hand, I think this game is a bit much. too many options, too many handcuffs, and too many variables. At the same time, I love the challenge of this game. For each handcuff or unexpected wrinkle, I remain undaunted, and instead desire only to do better next turn.

AquaSphere is a hell of a puzzle, and if you get a chance to play it, I think it’s worth it. I’m looking forward to my next opportunity to lose handily.

Player One Eric

[kadobeclothing]

How These 8 Direct-to-Consumer Brands Are Changing Ecommerce Forever

Direct-to-consumer (D2C) companies cater to people’s desire for simplicity. As much as consumers claim to love choice, analysis paralysis is a real thing; D2C brands eliminate the hassle of researching, browsing, and choosing from hundreds of options, making shopping practically effortless. 

D2C brands manufacture, market, and distribute their own products without middlemen, which enables them to reduce costs, interact directly with consumers, and provide a seamless start-to-finish buyer’s experience. For consumers, the easy buying process is typically the distinguishing factor when choosing D2C over a traditional shop.

Take a look at this customer review for the D2C mattress company, Casper. Despite this customer’s dissatisfaction with his mattress, he still gave the company five stars:

  Ultimately, Casper’s efficient delivery process and adept customer service impressed the consumer so much that he gave the company five stars — even though the product didn’t work out for him. This “painless experience” he describes, which is especially attainable for D2C businesses, is ultimately what makes these companies so popular among consumers. What is direct-to-consumer marketing? Direct-to-consumer marketing is when a company markets its product or service directly to their consumers. This direct relationship can occur through methods like social media, YouTube, or podcasts, but not through TV, billboards, or magazine advertisements. Creating innovative marketing campaigns is a necessity for D2C companies, many of which are up against some big-name competitors. Dollar Shave Club, for example, is up against Gillette razors, and Glossier’s makeup and skincare lines compete with stores like Sephora and Ulta. The benefits of D2C marketing are clear: through this direct relationship, these companies are creating strong relationships with their consumers, understanding them better, and reaching a more specific, appropriate audience. By controlling the start-to-finish buyer’s process, D2C companies reduce costs and have the advantage of focusing solely on consumers. D2C companies typically ship directly to consumers, partner with retail locations, or open pop-up shops to distribute their products.

Direct to Consumer Brands

Dollar Shave Club Glossier Warby Parker Julep Cards Against Humanity BarkBox Casper Blue Apron

Every D2C company does advertising a little differently. We’ve examined eight D2C companies that all share one thing in common: their one-of-a-kind approach to marketing and advertising has brought them lots of recognition, customers, and revenue.  Let’s examine these eight D2C companies and discuss what you can take away from their strategies. Whether you work for a D2C company or not, there are plenty of tangible marketing practices you can still try out for yourself. 1. Dollar Shave Club No one can guarantee that a video will go viral. But it doesn’t hurt to have a strategy in place. Dollar Shave Club, which sells — you guessed it — razors (among other bathroom essentials), launched their ecommerce company with a 1:33 minute video. Their video is wacky and memorable, with dance numbers, shaving babies, and a guy named Mike traipsing around a warehouse and making proclamations like, “Are the blades any good? No … our blades are f**ing great.” The video was a huge success. In the first three months, it received 4.75 million views, and within the first two days of the company’s launch, 12,000 people had already signed up for Dollar Shave Club razors.

The video doesn’t come across like an advertisement, it seems like a funny video your brother’s goofy friend made in his garage — which probably explains why so many people sent it to friends and shared it on social media. But Dollar Shave Club didn’t rely on organic reach alone to promote their launch video. Before promoting their video, Dollar Shave Club reached out to tech publications to let them know when it was going live, provided these publications early access to the video, edited a shorter version to run on late-night TV, and spent $10,000 promoting it on social media, among other things.  They didn’t just reach out to any tech publications, either — they focused on media properties already reaching the male demographic they wanted to target, like Thrillist and Uncrate. Takeaway: It may not be feasible to aim for a viral video, but it is possible to create great content and use your money and other resources to market it to the right demographic. Hopefully, your audience will do the hard work from there. 2. Glossier When I think of Glossier, I think of one word: accessible. The makeup and skincare industry can be a complicated, convoluted world to navigate. Glossier has simplified the approach to buying beauty products, both through their marketing and product design. Glossier’s advertising has no pretense. For example, rather than working with influencers, the brand gave free products to 500 “superfans” who had purchased the most product or engaged the most with the brand. The evidence of Glossier’s cult following reverberates across social media. Customers and employees alike share videos and images sampling their products and teaching viewers how to properly use them. Moreover, the brand encourages customers of every age, ethnicity, and gender to showcase their Glossier, making the brand accessible on multiple levels.

Whether customers are ordering from Glossier’s ecommerce site or visiting one of its popular pop-up shops, the experience is unforgettable. Shoppers receive Glossier stickers and the memorable Glossier Pink Pouch (which Glossier even sold on its own). Takeaway: Glossier has created a loyal following and accessible, fresh shopping experience in a convoluted industry. The brand creates a customer experience that can’t help but be shared on social media, serving as both user-generated content and customer advocacy.  3. Warby Parker Warby Parker’s D2C model eliminates the hassle of shopping for eyeglasses by sending you multiple pairs and letting you return the ones you don’t like. The convenience of choosing eyeglasses in your own home is Warby Parker’s biggest selling point. Warby Parker knew their customers were already taking pictures and videos of their glasses to send to friends for advice, so they started asking customers to post their images on social media with the hashtag #warbyhometryon … as a reward for posting, Warby Parker pairs those customers with one of their online personal stylists. Today, almost 25,000 people have posted with the Warby Parker hashtag on Instagram.

The company also pays YouTube influencers to post videos of themselves trying different Warby Parker glasses on. The tactic is popular — there are currently tens of thousands of results on YouTube for “Warby Parker try on”. More importantly, encouraging people to share their home try-on experiences on social media also makes consumers more likely to buy. Warby Parker found that customers who shared content online were 50% more likely to make the purchase.  Takeaway: The #Warbyhometryon marketing campaign succeeded by encouraging customers to promote something they were already doing — taking photos and videos of themselves trying on eyeglasses — on social media, a channel through which Warby knew could reach their millennial audience. This effort also naturally created a highly-impactful user-generated content campaign that boosted awareness of the Warby Parker brand through its customers. By tapping into natural behaviors, Warby Parker was able to introduce its products to new customers as well as boost conversions. 4. Julep Julep, a monthly customizable subscription beauty box, released a female empowerment video called Throw Anything at Me. The video features a woman putting on Julep makeup and then tackling issues related to women’s rights. On Julep’s website, the ad is described as a “celebration, a rallying cry, championing every woman’s innate power”.

The ad briefly features a few Julep products, but it mainly focuses on the woman in the ad and the things being “thrown” at her. It also introduces a bit of humor through the text message blurbs, a falling man holding wine and winking, and stunned onlookers.  Along with the ad, Julep made a similarly-named video game in which consumers could act like the female in the video and engage with the ad while having fun. Moreover, it brought viewers directly to the Julep website where they’d hopefully shop for products or subscribe to the beauty box. Takeaway: There are plenty of subscription beauty boxes out there. To differentiate themselves, Julep didn’t advertise what it was — it advertised what it stood for. It helped build a sense of trust and camaraderie between customers and the brand prior to asking them to make a purchase. 5. Cards Against Humanity Cards Against Humanity, a sarcastic and taboo card game founded in 2011, understands their audience very well. And, if you know your audience well, you can break the rules. For instance, in 2013, Cards Against Humanity sold its product for $5 more on Black Friday, and sales actually went up. In 2015, they sold nothing for $5 … and received $71,000 from consumers. In 2016, they dug a hole in the ground and filled it back up — and raised $100,000 in the process. I don’t know about you, but selling nothing sure seems like breaking the rules to me.

This strategy wouldn’t work for most companies, but it worked for Cards Against Humanity. The company knew their audience would pay attention, appreciate their sense of humor, and, pay for it. Takeaway: While it may not be a good idea to sell nothing, remember it’s okay to employ some stunts if you trust your audience will get it. Who knows? You may profit in the process. 6. BarkBox Everyone loves their dogs, but not everyone loves running constant errands to find and refill new food, treats, or toys. BarkBox noticed this market gap and created a subscription service that provide dog products, services, and experiences. One thing that BarkBox does very well is cater to its target audience: urban dog owners who don’t have the time or means (i.e. transportation) to shop for or with their dogs. Unlike other pet subscription services like Chewy, BarkBox sends pre-packed, themed boxes to customers each month — customers don’t designate what they receive. Since it’s conception, BarkBox has also expanded into other markets including an outdoor dog park community and an ecommerce site where customers can shop for products they received in other BarkBoxes. Most importantly, BarkBox has built a community around their brand. BarkBox subscribers feel a sense of camaraderie with other customers, especially since most are receiving the same treats and toys in their boxes. This feeling alone has propelled over 300,000 customers to post about their #dogsofBark on Instagram.

BarkBox sticks to their narrative well: dogs first. They stay true to this even in their charity work — the brand donates 10% of its proceeds go to animal shelters. Takeaway: BarkBox makes its customers feel as though they, and their dogs, are a part of a community through their subscription boxes and donations. Build camaraderie among your customers, and they’ll advocate for your brand. 7. Casper Shopping for mattresses is an overwhelming experience. Besides feeling like goldilocks with the “soft, plush, semi-firm, and firm” options, you’re also forced to contemplate price, size, and whether you want memory foam, gel, or hybrid. Mattress company Casper prevents this frustrating process by providing one, perfect-for-anyone mattress. Since Casper’s primary goal is to differentiate themselves from traditional mattress companies, they opt to use non-traditional marketing methods. Casper focuses its marketing efforts in two places: New York City and Los Angeles. In New York, they’ve used MTA stations to post cheerful advertisements. They set up a satellite office in LA and have leveraged Hollywood connections and social media influencers. Kylie Jenner, for instance, posted a picture of herself on a Casper mattress, a photo that doubled Casper’s net sales. Casper didn’t fight to stand out in the traditional mattress industry. Instead, they used urban spaces to reach their target millennial audience and worked with social media influencers to display their brand as trendy and unique. The brand has also been running TV ads since it opened its doors, reporting that, “TV is the mass media that provides a very large reach in a limited amount of time…when bought efficiently, [it] allows us to maximize repetition and therefore increase brand recognition.” Takeaway: While it’s wise to learn from businesses who’ve come before you, don’t hesitate to try some non-traditional or out-of-the-box methods to start out and garner attention. Also, invest in methods that build awareness around your brand, not only sell products. This is how you continually bring in new customers — an important distinction for Casper as even the most loyal customers don’t need new mattresses every month or year. 8. Blue Apron Blue Apron sources, ships, and simplifies the process of making healthy, local food for customers. The brand includes ready-to-use recipes that correspond with each subscription box’s ingredients. The company faces a lot of competition nowadays from other subscription meal services, including Amazon, HelloFresh, Green Chef, and Plated. As a result of this competition, Blue Apron’s biggest challenge has been explaining how their product stands out from the rest. In 2015, Blue Apron reached out to popular food bloggers like Naomi of Love Taza and Anne of Fannetastic Food, as well as social media influencers, and asked these industry leaders to explain in-depth what Blue Apron was. This is generally an effective strategy, as food bloggers and social media influencers have already gained the trust of their audience.

Blue Apron then took it a step further, sponsoring their content on podcasts like Gimlet Media and The No Sleep Podcast. The company recognized podcasts as a worthwhile investment. Almost 50 million people ages 13 and up listen to podcasts, but more than one-third of the top 100 iTunes podcasts have no ads at all. With plenty of supply and little demand, Blue Apron’s sponsored content stood out from the rest. Employing social media influencers and bloggers to promote their brand, and sponsoring ads on podcasts, paid off: In 2015, Blue Apron sales increased by 500%. Takeaway: Blue Apron separated itself from the competition by using industry influencers to reach already-engaged audiences and promoting its content on appropriate (and less-crowded) platforms like podcasts.  These eight direct to consumer brands are impacting ecommerce and customer expectations in major ways. Implement some of the strategies and best practices from this article for your own business.

Source link

source https://www.kadobeclothing.store/how-these-8-direct-to-consumer-brands-are-changing-ecommerce-forever/

[theatredirectors]

Cyndy Marion

Hometown? 

NYC. I grew up in Manhattan, 19th and 3rd. 

Where are you now?

Manhattan, 16th and 3rd. I moved downtown 3 blocks! I went to college in North Carolina, grad school in Brooklyn and did a few brief stints in Italy and New Mexico, but ended up back in my hometown. Manhattan is in my blood!

What's your current project?

My 2nd play as a writer, Broken Story, running at The Gene Frankel Theatre Nov. 8-16th. It's about a young NYC journalist obsessed with the idea of solving the story behind a brutal LA murder. As a director, I write plays that I would want to direct. Plays that I feel are challenging and exciting for both actors and directors to work on. I'm usually inspired by real-life stories that have a sense of mystery or intrigue. My first play, You Are Perfect was inspired by the story of Manson follower Susan Atkins. Broken Story was inspired by the brutal murder of an LA novelist. 

Why and how did you get into theatre?

I fell in love with directing in college. I was working on Sam Shepard's A Lie of the Mind for directing class and was hooked. From there I assistant directed a MainStage college production and went on to direct my own one-act, a production of Agatha Christie's The Rats. I was a history major with a focus on Italian Renaissance studies. I was supposed to go on and pursue a Rhodes Scholarship, but the idea of continuing scholarly work in isolation and the need to learn at least 2 or 3 more languages deterred me. I chose to pursue directing instead. I wanted to pursue a field where I could combine research with community and collaboration. 

What is your directing dream project?

My current project, directing my play Broken Story is a dream project. I only want to work on dream projects. That's why I have my own theater company, White Horse Theater Company because I always want to be working on dream projects that I am passionate about with artists I admire, respect and want in the room with me.  Of course, I dream that one day we will have more resources; larger budgets, access to bigger theaters with better equipment, the ability to take on larger-scale projects with more collaborators. I'd love to do a musical. A deep, psychological musical, music and dance have a way of tapping into emotion on such a profound level. What kind of theatre excites you?

Theater that breaks boundaries, and explores new forms. Theater that is theatrical and inventive and does not just rely on the spoken word to tell the story. Theater that is best served by the live medium and cannot be better realized on film.  Theater that surprises me and moves me. I think all plays should have an element of suspense--it moves the story forward and keeps the audience engaged. I love plays that have an "ah-ha" moment. 

What do you want to change about theatre today?

I'd love to see a NYC theater that is not so focused on Broadway. Broadway is a commercial enterprise and the work has got to "sell." There are so many financial risks and pressures on making that kind of work. I'd like to see more appreciation, support, and awareness for the indie art being made off the Great White Way.  Not everyone makes art to make money. Theater does not have to be a commodity. It can be an expression, a conversation, a protest. There is so much more to it than that and I'd love to see a shift in our perspective and a deeper appreciation and respect for art as art. 

What is your opinion on getting a directing MFA?

I think it all depends on why you are getting one. If you are getting an MFA solely because you think it will open doors to a directing career, then I think that's the wrong reason. I got my MFA at Brooklyn College because I wanted time and space to really hone my craft. I used those three years to find out who I was as a director and what kind of material I wanted to work on. I had access to mentors and facilities and most importantly developed a network of peers and professionals that I called upon when launching my own career. And by going to a city school, with lower tuition costs and a merit scholarship, I left grad school debt-free. 

Who are your theatrical heroes?

Sam Shepard, Tennessee Williams and Ivo Van Hove. Sam Shepard is, in my option, the greatest American playwright. His plays are poetic, visual, visceral, and rhythmic. They are highly theatrical and physical and are filled with mystery and emotion. They are personal and yet also speak to us as a culture. I think Shepard has been my greatest influence as both a director and a playwright.  I love the later work of Tennessee Williams--these plays break the barrier of realistic theater and explore new forms, such as truncated language, dance, and metaphor. Ivo Van Hove blows my mind with his work. His bold interpretations of classic texts are both visually stunning and gut-wrenching. He employs multiple mediums to tell these stories in a fresh, relevant and affecting way.  I'll never forget seeing his production of The Crucible. During the scene between Elizabeth and John Proctor, his use of the musical underscore combined with the actor's delivery of the line moved me to an explosion of tears. 

Any advice for directors just starting out?

Make the work! Find plays that excite you and get people together you admire and find ways to do the work. Choose plays and projects you feel you have a "secret"  understanding of what you want/need to share with the world. Hone your voice and vision and be true to it. Don't be afraid to ask for money. I think artists today have to be entrepreneurs--meaning we have to find a means to an end--a way to support ourselves and the work. Don't feel bad about needing a "day job"  to support yourself. It this job allows you to do the work you want to be doing than it serves its purpose! You are a director!  Go for your dreams, but make the work you enjoy in the meantime. Don't wait around for someone else to give you the opportunity. 

Plugs!

Tickets to Broken Story: https://whtc.ticketleap.com/brokenstory/

My off-off Broadway theater company, White Horse Theater Company founded in 2003. whitehorsetheater.com

The Indie Theater Fund--supporting and promoting Indie Theater Artists http://www.indietheaterfund.org

The Players Club--A social club for Artists and Patrons of the Arts http://theplayersnyc.org

Gene Frankel Theatre https://www.genefrankeltheatre.com

[makingmymarkcharlie]

Some time ago my Dad asked me if I would be interested in doing a talk at his churches as part of a series of sermons from different people focusing on family, dealing with adversity and also on charity.  This was designed as a way to raise awareness of things other people in the area deal with that we may not be aware of,  as well as what they have achieved or built because of their experiences.   I was privileged to be asked. It was not only an excuse for a weekend at home, and importantly for some sun, but also an opportunity to raise awareness of MRKH at the community level and in the area I grew up in.

Whilst I don’t have a problem discussing the ins and outs of MRKH I was also conscious that explaining this clearly in church probably meant that I needed to be a bit tactful with my choice of words.  In reality of course there is no reason for me to censor it but this is rural Kent after all 😉

Having seen my Dad do a number of sermons it was weird that I was the one giving it this time and much more daunting and emotional than I was expecting in front of my family and best mate.  But what wonderful comments from people old and young, men and women I received and lots of thank yous for opening their eyes to something they didn’t know existed.

Lots of talk of bravery for sharing my personal story, which is lovely to hear but to me its not about being brave its finding that strength to take adversity and turn it into something positive.  Its been a long road to get here of course but the change it has made for me to come to terms with it and accept it for what it is makes a huge difference.

I am sure I have said it before but never doubt the strength you have even if you don’t feel you do.  All it means is you haven’t taken a step back and found it yet.  But it will be there, it always is

Charlie xxx

This is me – Sermon 25th June 2018

When I was growing up I always wanted a family and to have children.  I just thought that’s what everyone did when they grew up.  They got married to that perfect person and then babies would appear out of nowhere. Probably delivered by a stalk.

  As I grew up I met people who were adopted but I had never really thought about what causes that and why there might be a situation that someone might have to go down  a different route to have a family 

I found out when I was 17 that I wouldn’t be able to carry my own children because I was born without a womb. 

  I have a condition called Mayer Rokitansky Kuster Hauser syndrome or MRKH.  As a syndrome it means that I have had it since I was born. There is nothing that my parents could have done differently it is just the way it is and I like 1 in 4500 other women share the same genetic malformation.  This is considered to be a rare but not rare condition.  To put it in context there are 2.3 million people in the world who have Multiple Sclerosis which equates to ~1 in 3500 and I would suspect most of you are more likely to have heard of that than MRKH.  

  Finding out something like this is very difficult to comprehend and explain at any age but as a teenager it’s so difficult.  You feel like you aren’t normal which at a sensitive age like that is not what you need.  Getting to support quickly really does make a significant difference to helping to process this life changing condition.  It may not be obvious physically but the psychological impact of that is not to be under estimated.  

  In reality I am actually one of the lucky ones.  I found support very quickly and within a few weeks of finding out what the problem was and my doctor knowing the right specialist to refer me to I was moved over into their care

  I have met and continue to meet so many people who are not as lucky as I have been.  It seems to be a lottery.  Now I appreciate that globally you may expect a lot of variation but this happens even within the UK.  For some it may have taken several painful months, years or even decades for them to find out what it is that they have and start to have any real closure to try and deal with it. I cannot begin to imagine how they might feel. 

  its quite obvious how much we as the public know about this condition in comparison to Other fertility issues related to IVF, adoption or conditions like PCOS yet MRKH is still almost completely unknown (it feels like).  The reason for this, and without going into medical detail, is that there are some very sensitive elements and effects of mrkh and of course talking about the sensitive parts of our bodies etc is just something that so often is taboo.  

  About 8months after I was diagnosed I was in hospital for a few days and I met a girl called Becky.  Becky was 7years older than me but had also only just found out she also had MRKH I have never met anyone like her and I am certain I never will! We both felt relieved to have met over our shared condition. And being able to talk to someone that wasn’t a medical professional really made a difference.  How did it make you feel, how did you find out.  Having someone else there made me not feel alone. 

  Not long after, I started going to the support groups that the national centre for MRKH which is in West London held.  Now its not the most salubrious of locations next to Wormwood scrubs however it has some of the world most well known specialists in MRKH. They hold 2 support groups a year, support groups that the staff themselves fund, at least in the early days because there was not the existing funding from the NHS to hold these really vital support groups. 

  Women of all ages and stages and their friends, partners, parents, come from all over the country for these three hour support groups.  To meet others, share experiences and hear specialist talks on things like IVF surrogacy and adoption, the only options available to those of us who would still like a family. Or of course, more recently, talks on womb transplants following the trial approval just a few weeks ago, providing a new hope to many and not just those with MRKH. 

  These are things that as a 17 year old I hardly knew about let alone ever had to think that I might need to do myself if I wanted to have children of my own. I have for a number of years been frustrated by how difficult it seems to be for people to find support.  The simple act of meeting someone else with the same condition can have such a positive impact. 

I admit I didn’t really know how to start with this.  I had no idea what to do or how to do it other than I felt I needed to do something.  I had heard of MRKH connect a charity based in the UK which had this sole aim to bring those with MRKH together.  Set up by two MRKH women who themselves connected over the internet they wanted others with MRKH to find the friendship and support they had so they set up a website with a forum and chat area and a way for women to meet others from all over the world suddenly bringing that world smaller to them.  

  Now don’t get me wrong the support of family and friends is also vital but there is something about sharing experiences with someone that truly understands and can relate which is also so important to helping to accept MRKH.  

  3 years ago I had a message from one of my friends from the support groups asking me if I was up for a challenge.  Now I admit I didn’t really know what I was signing up for but needless to say I think it totally changed my life for the better. 

  I have always been quite open about MRKH always finding it easier to be so.  It is a part of who I am after all but that isn’t to say it was easy.  I have had several sets of counselling and some darker periods too but over time I have come to accept MRKH.  

  The challenge Jen had set was for us to do the 100km London to Brighton walk and whilst doing it to raise awareness for MRKH.  We started a blog to document our own experiences, and really as a cathartic release, whilst also raising money for MRKH connect.  

  In October 2015 we posted out first post not only to announce our blog but also to explain why we were doing this meaning we needed to be open about out MRKH to the world of Facebook and twitter which didn’t come without some trepidation.  

  All we received was overwhelming support for what we were doing.  Over the following months we openly shared our lives, our experiences and our training mishaps in the hope that it would provide comfort and support to others as well as helping our friends family colleagues and joe public begin to take note of MRKH

  We raised over 4000 on that walk thanks to the generosity of those we knew and plenty we didn’t.  Since then I have personally taken on two further challenges, continued blogging and was honoured to also become a trustee for MRKH connect providing ongoing support for our website and social media outreach which we continue to grow.  

  Family means different things to different people.  I have learnt through my own experiences that having children is not the be all and end all for me although I will at some point have a family of my own.  For now though I have a partner and a family I love and I have many little people in my life and I am truly honoured to be part of theirs. 

  Whilst it is of course not something I would ever choose it has I believe made me a stronger person because of it. 

  I hope I can show others with or without MRKH that whilst there are many things that appear insurmountable you can get to a level of acceptance that helps you have and enjoy life to the full, just perhaps in a different way than you ever planned or considered

Something inside so strong Some time ago my Dad asked me if I would be interested in doing a talk at his churches as part of a series of sermons from different people focusing on family, dealing with adversity and also on charity. 

[djsamaha-blog]

Building a Blog While Working Full-Time? Cut Out EVERYTHING Except These 3 Things

Let me guess…

Between the 9-5, the 30-minutes-each-way commute, and having a social life, you feel like you're piling too much on your plate.

You're terrible at using the little free time you do have to work on your side hustle, because you're exhausted.

So how do you find time to focus on your own blog when you're already working all day for somebody else?

If this sounds familiar, it's because I know what you're going through. I've been there.

When I started my first blog, I was working full-time and taking a full-time course load. When I started Unsettle, I held down a contract that took up most of my daytime hours.

Now, I juggle coaching clients, freelancing clients, consulting clients, online courses, product creation, contributing to other publications like Huffington Post, writing for Unsettle, and being a new mom.

“Content marketing” – or my blog – is the one thing that keeps my business going and allows me to make multiple 5-figures/month. . So how do I juggle it all?

And more importantly, how can you juggle your full-time gig with your fledgling blog and live to tell the tale?

Well, you cut out everything and become hyper-focused on three things.

The Only 3 Things You Need to Focus on To Build Your Blog

A funny thing happens when you start a blog.

You're writing articles, interacting with your readers, answering comments, and then you're yanked in a different direction.

Social media!

YouTube videos!

You've got shiny object syndrome, which would be fine, if only you had time for that shit. But you don't. You're a side-hustler, and you need to focus.

There are only three things you need to focus on to build a profitable blog.

Notice that I said profitable blog. You can do whatever you want – and focus on whatever you want – if you're journalling. That's cool.

But if you want to build a blog that not only has an impact on the world but also gives you at least the option to quit that 9-5, here are the three things you need to buckle down on:

Building Your Email List

Nurturing Your Audience

Solving Problems

Let’s go.

1. Building Your Email List

When I started my first blog, and throughout the entire time I owned it, I didn't have an email list.

Big mistake.

Without an email list I missed out on the opportunity to have a great relationship with my readers – not to mention tens of thousands of dollars I would have been able to earn if I had one.

Your email list is your results driver and will make everything you do easier.

Why You Need an Email List

Think of your email list as your VIP readership. They gave you their email because they considered your resources valuable, liked you, and want to hear more from you.

Your subscribers are more likely to interact with your brand, tell a friend about you, buy a product, or enroll in a course.

They’re the real MVPs. Statistics show that:

Email marketing has the highest ROI of any other marketing platform available. A 4300% ROI, to be exact.

Landing a new customer is 40x more likely on email than it is on social media.

People click on email links 6x more than Tweets.

The subscribers on your email list are 3x more likely to share your content on social media than a visitor from another source.

Ok, so more conversions, money, traffic, and shares. So far so good, right? The benefits don’t stop there.

Having an engaged email list also means…

It’s easier to make money. Because your subscribers like and trust you, they’re more likely to support your launches and buy your products. Your marketing efforts will be more effective with them than with strangers on Facebook.

It’s cheaper, too. You can make more money by sending a single email to your 4000-people email list than by spending thousands of dollars on Facebook ads to bring 10k people to your landing page.

How? It’s all about your conversion rate. If your email marketing conversion rate is 7% and the conversion rate of Facebook marketing is 2%, considering you have a $30 product, here’s what happens…

4k*7%=280*$30=$8.4k in sales.

10k*2%=200*$30=$6k-$2.7k(ad fee*)=$3.3k in sales.

*The CPC (cost-per-click) is $0.27 in average and we are assuming 10k people click through your ad.

Email list for the win. With email marketing, you don’t have to pay for ads, you get a higher conversion rate, and you don’t even need a giant list to make it happen.

You have guaranteed traffic. With an audience eager to read your articles, you don’t have to hope the SEO gods to send you traffic, or that your article will go viral on Twitter. If your email click-through is 20% (on a 4k person list), you’ll have an initial traffic boost of 800 people who’ll read, comment, and share your article. Better than refreshing your new blog post for 10 mins and seeing a big fat 0 on your share bar, right?

You can easily validate your product ideas. Have an idea for a course you’re not sure people will buy? Just ask your subscribers what they struggle with regarding the topic of your course. For example, if you want to create a course about indoor gardening, you’ll ask your list “Do you wish you could start an indoor garden? What stops you? What would make it easy?”. This will help you 1) realize whether or not you have the right idea for the course and 2) know your audience better.

You are in total control. Your email list is yours, and no platform or corporation can take it away. There’s no middle man who can affect your reach by changing its algorithm, so your access to your subscribers relies solely on you.

You can access your audience any time you want. Because you’re in control, you can choose when to contact your readers. If you just published an article, you can tell your audience immediately and get a traffic boost, instead of having to wait for it to gain traction on social media.

You have your target market on speed dial. Struggling to find the right words for your sales page? Wondering what type of offers will attract your audience? Take a peek inside your readers’ minds. Ask them what their #1 struggle is right now, and use their words in your copy, or ask them what they’d like to learn the most from you, and create freebies around that.

You can literally make money while you sleep. What if I told you, you can create an automated email marketing sequence in an hour that will do the selling for you 24/7 without you lifting a finger? You can when you have an engaged email list. You’re able to set up an email sequence with premium offers once, automate it, and then watch the money roll into your Paypal account.

You can bond with your audience. The more you talk and share with your readers, the more they’ll care about you. Chatting with your subscribers through email creates a level of trust and connection no other platform can match.

Want to have the time to grow your email list? Click here to sign up for my time management class and learn how to build a profitable blog when you're working full-time.

Now that you’re convinced growing your email list is crucial for your biz, it’s time to take action.

Get started with these tools:

The Tools I Use to Grow My Email List

Sumo

I love using Sumo for email capture. I offer content upgrades, freebies, and courses with their easy-to-customize opt-in boxes, welcome mats, click triggers, and in-line forms.

The clean dashboard gives me a quick overview of how each form is performing, and all the opt-ins can be edited in minutes with a drag-and-drop editor.

You can create a high-converting form in just six steps.

Full disclosure: I write for Sumo, so while I don’t get any affiliate commission for mentioning them, I may be slightly biased 😉

Click Funnels

I use Click Funnels to design landing pages and some opt-in forms. Their editor is intuitive and I love how easy it is to A/B test all the elements I want.

ConvertKit

ConvertKit is my new email service provider.

I use it to schedule emails, create automated sequences, segment my audience by the topic they’re interested in, and A/B test my headlines to make sure I’m using the language that resonates the most with my audience.

An email service provider is necessary — think of it like a house for your new subscribers. It stores the emails that Sumo and Click Funnels allows you to capture, and communicate with your people.

Grow Your List With Irresistible Content Upgrades

Once you have the right tools to capture leads, it’s time to use them in the most effective way. That means setting up pops-ups all over your blog, right?

Wrong.

Random pop-ups on your site will grow your list as fast as writing “subscribe to my list” in a piece of paper, putting it inside a bottle, and throwing it into the sea.

The only way to skyrocket your email list is by combining…

The right offer

The right opt-in form for that offer

That’s where content upgrades come in.

If you want to grow your list, give people something they want and need.

Content upgrades are content-specific bonus resources that boost the value of your articles. An effective upgrade complements a blog post so well it feels like a no-brainer to get it.

Any resource that makes your article more actionable, more digestible, and easier to follow, is an useful content upgrade. For example:

A checklist.

A workbook.

A template.

A printable pdf.

This video class 😉

Next time you write an blog post, include a downloadable resource to shower your readers with value and grow your email list.

After you’ve optimized your site for conversions, the next step is…

2. Nurturing a Great Relationship with Your Audience

This funny things seems to happen with some bloggers as they grow.

They sit on top of their growth like Scrooge McDuck on a pile of cash and forget about the real meaning of what they have.

Behind their email lists they have human beings who care enough to pay attention to what they're writing, saying, and doing, and supporting them on the ride.

I think a lot of the online marketing world forgets that the number you see when you log into Aweber or ConvertKit or MailChimp? Those are real people.

There's no point in building an email list or a blog at all if you don't care about them, too.

This is why you need an amazing relationship with those people who have subscribed to your email list, and read your blog.

Spend time nurturing a relationship with them. They're not robots and neither are you.

How to Connect with Your Audience

You’ll interact with your audience in three places:

On your email

On your blog

On social media

Since your time is limited, you can’t spend 4 hours chatting with people on Twitter, so you have to focus on your most impactful interactions and cut out the rest. Here’s how:

What to Send Your Email List

Once you set up opt-in boxes with irresistible freebies and subscribers start pouring in, you have to keep them engaged.

Getting your readers’ emails is just step one. You have to make it worth their while and grow the relationship. This is exactly what you should send your list:

A Killer Welcome Email

A welcome email is the beginning of your relationship with your subscribers, so make it a an awesome one.

Your first email should have:

A friendly headline.

A thank you for signing up to your list.

A short explanation of what your readers can expect from your emails.

A description of who you are, what you do, and why you do it (optional).

Links to your most helpful/popular resources (optional).

An invitation to follow you on social media.

In my welcome email, I tell my readers what they can expect from my emails, who I am, what is Unsettle, and why I started it:

Noah’s welcome email encourages replies by asking his readers what type of emails they want to receive from him:

Tim Ferriss’ first email points his readers to his best material:

The two main goals of your welcome email are:

To set the right expectations.

To get your readers excited about being a part of your list.

Once you do that, you can start sending out your best resources.

New Article Updates

Your subscribers should be the first to know when you publish a new article. Send them a short email with a link to your new piece each time you publish to give them priority and boost your traffic.

This is the email I sent my list last week when I published my latest article:

Exclusive Tips

Share helpful tips and tools that have worked for you with your subscribers. I sent my list this productivity hack one day that I felt insanely focused and energized:

Exclusive Discounts

If you are doing affiliate marketing or have your own course or product, show your subs some love with a promo code. Gina Horkey from Horkey Handbook sent her list a promo code for 25% off on a pitch template bundle. Who doesn’t love saving money?

Invitations to Webinars and Workshops

If you’re having a webinar, masterclass, training, or workshop, tell your email list first. You’ll boost attendance and they might invite their friends because they trust you. Look at how Nico Moreno did it:

Behind-the-Scenes Sneak Peeks

Build a stronger relationship with your audience by sharing some behind-the-scenes snippets. Being real and transparent with your subscribers will make them like and trust you even more. People can’t relate to a faceless brand, but they can relate to you.

This is the email I sent my list after my daughter Poppy was born. I had been away from Unsettle for a while, and here I explained why and made the big reveal:

Surveys

Remember what I said before about validating your course and product ideas with your list? That’s how I finished up my Etsy course. I sent my list a short & sweet email about the upcoming course and asked them to take a quick survey to find out what they wanted to know about running an Etsy shop. I received a ton of responses that I used to shape the copy of the sales page and the course itself.

Pro tip: Use Survey Monkey to create quick surveys for your list. Step #1. After creating your account, click on “Create Survey”.Step #2. Choose “start from scratch”. Step #3. Name your survey and choose the right category. Step #4. Customize your survey.

Newsletter Topics

If you picked the newsletter option to grow your list, you’re probably wondering what it should be about. Get inspired with these newsletter formats:

The weekly curation. Cover a lot of ground by curating your favorite reads and finds of the week. Include a mix of your own content as well as other people’s resources, news, and tools. See how Nat does it in his Monday Medley newsletter:

The practical newsletter. Show off your expertise (and research skills) by sharing weekly tips that make life easier for your readers. Amy Lynn Andrews shares practical tips for bloggers, freelancers, and business owners through her “Useletter”.

The private article. Instead of talking about 5 different things, focus on one topic. Paul Jarvis sends one useful mini article every weekend on his Sunday Dispatches.

The conversation starter. Start a discussion with your readers by giving your opinion on a subject and asking questions. You want to make your readers feel they’re having a chat with you. Lauren from Restored 316 Designs sends a weekly “From Lauren’s Desk” newsletter to discuss blogging-related topics with her readers.

Answer your email

Reply to emails from your readers personally. If someone admires you and your work enough to email you about it, a thoughtful response will make them feel acknowledged and appreciated, which increases trust in your brand.

How To Interact With Your Fans

Foster a deep sense of community around your brand by actively interacting with your followers on your blog and social media.

Focus on these 2 things:

#1. Reply to blog post comments. Replying to each and every comment makes those readers feel appreciated and shows others that you care about your audience. The more you reply, the more likely people are to leave a comment.

#2. Pick ONE social media channel and excel at it. Dabbling into social media without a clear strategy is a disservice to your business. You simply don't have the time to keep up with all the social media platforms competing for your attention. That’s exactly why you need to laser focus your efforts on a single channel instead of spreading yourself thin across many platforms. Pick your favorite social media channel and be hella active in there. The rest can wait.

For example, let’s say you pick Instagram. You’ll have to:

Post at least once a day

Reply to the comments people leave on your photos

Reply to DMs

Like and comment on posts from your fans

Get my time management class to learn the productivity strategies that will help you free up more time to interact with your audience and grow your blog.

3. Becoming a Problem-Solving Ninja

After you have built and email list and nurtured a relationship with the people on it, further that relationship (and your audience) by actually contributing to their lives.

The words “provide value” are tossed around so much in internet marketing that they're devoid of all their – well, value. Don't just provide value. You can provide value by handing out pennies.

Contribute to your audience's lives in a meaningful way. Make an impact on them. Solve the problems they're experiencing with your topic, niche, or industry.

Don't hand out pennies. Hand out Benjamins worth of valuable, useful, and actionable guides, tips, advice, inspiration and just general written badassery.

How to Change Your Readers’ Lives

#1. Create the best damn content in your niche

If you want to make a life-changing impact on your readers, you have to become their go-to resource.

Be so helpful that your name is the first thing that pops into their minds when they need a solution related to what you teach.

You can achieve that level of authority by creating the top resources on your field.

There’s no point in pounding away at your keyboard for hours if you are not trying to create the best content out there.

Cranking out helpful resources won’t only boost your credibility and authority, it’ll also…

Improve your Google rankings

Boost your traffic

Get new readers in your email list

Turn you into an influencer

Help you get more clients and customers

I know that creating “the best” resources sounds daunting, but if you’re willing to put in the work it’s 100% doable.

Let’s pretend you’re trying to create the best resources about biking. Here’s what you do:

Step #1: Listen to what your audience needs

The first step to creating awesome content is doing your research. You want to find out:

What people want to read about biking. Use Answer the Public to find the topics and keywords people are searching for.

You’ll get all these results by typing in “biking”:

Just download the CSV file to make it easier to study:

Search Reddit & Quora for questions people have about your topic and the problems they face.

Quora search for “biking”:

Reddit search in r/bicycling:

How they want to read it. Google your topic in a incognito window to see the top organic results. What format are they in?

This website has long-form, detailed, and image-heavy articles, as well as videos. That’s how bikers like to consume content, so that’s the type of resources you have to create.

Step #2: Look at what is missing from other resources

Now that you have a sense of the problems bikers have, take a look at the articles from your competition and identify:

Weaknesses and gaps.

How you can improve those aspects.

Spend 1-2 hours checking the top resources on your niche, and then come up with a list things you can do better than them. Perhaps you can add more imagery, write more clearly, format your article better, write longer articles, make nicer videos, or remove annoying ads.

Step #3: Write better articles

After discovering how you can beat your competition, it’s time to craft your best content.

Brainstorm 20-30 headline ideas using the same headline structure your competitors use, and then pick the one you like the most.

For example, if you used the headline structure of this article:

You could come up a headline like this: 5 Pieces of Gear That Make Riding In The City Way Safer- and 3 Mistakes To Avoid.

Outline your article with the main points. Write down every single possible subtopic so you have a clear structure and flow. Remember you want to create an incredible resource, so the more points the better.

Do your research. Close any knowledge gaps you might have by researching the heck out of each point. Keep open the tabs with studies or relevant resources you want to link to in your piece.

Just write. Now that you have an article outline and researched your topic, start typing.

Proofread like your life depends on it. Ok, your life doesn’t depend on it, but your impact does. Read and re-read your piece until it’s the best it can be. Ask yourself these questions:

Does it sound conversational and friendly?

Is it entertaining?

Does your personality shine through?

Are your points backed up with studies?

Are you simplifying some concepts with metaphors and analogies?

Are you using language your target audience would use?

Are your paragraphs short and to the point?

Is your writing fluff-free?

Step #4. Promote your articles like crazy

After creating the best possible article, share it with the world.

Use an SEO plugin like Yoast SEO to make sure your article is optimized for search engines before you hit “Publish”. This won’t create any short-term results, but doing SEO right from the beginning pays off incredibly well in the long-term.

Tell your email list about it.

Post it on your Facebook page and FB group.

Post it on Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Digg and Stumbleupon.

Post it to the right subreddit. In this case, r/bicycling.

Answer a Quora question about the topic you just wrote about, and drop a link to your article at the end.

Reach out to the authors of any articles you linked to, and politely ask if they would be willing to share it.

#2. Answer questions in forums and groups

Get the attention of your target audience by being extra helpful at the online communities they hang out.

When you offer value for free, you quickly cut through the noise and people start to notice you.

These are the best places to show off your expertise:

Facebook groups

Which FB groups have your ideal audience? Be there and become a valuable member by…

Responding to other people’s posts in a helpful way.

Posting 2-3 times a week on the group.

Sharing tips and asking thought-provoking questions.

That’s what Nico Moreno did in the Unsettle FB group when he became a member:

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

Exhibit C

He posted crazy useful copywriting tips several times a week just to help out other members.

That’s the kind of generosity that will get you noticed by your potential readers and customers. In fact, this tactic landed Nico high-playing clients who discovered him through these type of posts.

Don’t be stingy with your knowledge. The more you give the more you receive.

Quora

Answering relevant Quora questions makes you visible to your target audience and generates traffic to your site. Plus, the person who asked the question gets massive value from you.

Reddit

Creating Reddit threads with useful advice can send you a lot of traffic if you do it right.

Method #1: Post the right article in the right subreddit. Drop your link in a community that makes sense, like I did here:

I posted an article about toxic beliefs in a productivity subreddit and replied to all the comments.

Method #2. Include your article in a text post, not a link.

Instead of linking directly to your site, type out your advice in the text field and add a link to your piece at the bottom.

Why? Doing it like this will elicit more responses and make you look like a true problem-solver ninja.

Focus On These 3 Things and You'll Never Starve

You only have a few hours a week to focus on your blog.

You don't have time to waste on frivolous things. Your full-time job is demanding and you need to buckle down and focus.

So cut everything out except these three things. After all, to build a profitable business of any sort – including audience-based businesses like a blog – people need to know, like, and trust you.

Building your email list: Your audience is getting to know you.

Nurturing a great relationship with the people on your email list: Your audience is starting to like you.

Handing out Benjamins: Your audience is starting to trust you.

Nothing else matters.

If you're wondering how to manage your time such that you can fit even these things in as you work full time, my friend Tor (who is a time management bad ass) and I hosted a free class to help you through it.

The class is 100% free, and we won't try to sell you anything on it. We just want to set you up for blogging success.

Cool?

Want to Leave a Comment?Join the conversation in the Free Facebook Group

Hey, don't kill your momentum.

http://www.successwize.com/building-a-blog-while-working-full-time-cut-out-everything-except-these-3-things/

[junker-town]

WWE Battleground 2017: Full rundown and why you should care

SmackDown’s exclusive pay-per-view is all about setting up their side of SummerSlam

SmackDown’s latest brand-exclusive pay-per-view, Battleground, airs on Sunday, July 23 on the WWE Network, and it’s the prelude to the next of WWE’s Big Four events, SummerSlam. Don’t worry, I’ll avoid making weird references to war or puns about battles here. I’m supposed to make you care about this event, not roll your eyes at it.

This is a relatively lengthy card for one of WWE’s regular pay-per-views, so let’s get right into it.

Breezango vs. their mystery assailants

What am I looking at here? That is literally the question of the day with this match. Breezango — that’s Tyler Breeze and Fandango — are otherwise known as the Fashion Police. And the offices of the Fashion Police were ransacked by mystery attacks a couple of months back. Since then, the pair have been investigating all of their tag team coworkers, clearing them one at a time, and getting no closer to discovering the identities of their assailants.

Recently, though, Fandango was dressed up like a cowboy and he rode a toy horse and the horse was stolen and returned to the Fashion Police mutilate in a box. Also inside that box was a note telling Breezango that they would find out who did this at Battleground. And here we are!

Why you should care: Well besides the fact that the Fashion Files, the show within a show that has powered this story since it began, is one of the best parts of SmackDown, the way that this has all played out suggests that Fandango and Breeze are going to be fighting someone new.

Through process of elimination, we’re down to two guesses as to who could have been attacking these fashionistas. Why just two? Well, every single tag team on SmackDown has been cleared of suspicion. So, we’re left to wonder if Luke Harper and Erick Rowan have reformed their team, except this time outside of the influence of Bray Wyatt, or if we’re getting a brand new debut of SAnitY, who currently wrestles for NXT.

Either would be a fine answer — Harper is one of the top wrestlers on the show, and his previous work with Rowan as a tag team was excellent when they were actually given a chance to compete outside of Bray’s shadow. SAnitY is also incredibly promising, as Killian Dain is a big ole hoss, Alexander Wolfe has tons of promise, and, if Nikki Cross is coming with them, then SmackDown’s women’s division just got a huge boost.

Former TNA/Impact standout Eric Young is the group’s leader, but he’s been in more of a grooming role than a wrestling one, if you’re wondering why I put so much focus on the other three. That trio is the future of this stable.

Sami Zayn vs. Mike Kanellis

What am I looking at here? Mike Kanellis and Maria Kanellis are in love. They’re going to teach you about the power of love, but also seemingly just their love, specifically, as they don’t seem to care too much for anyone else around them. Like, say, Sami Zayn, who has had the misfortune of bumping into this pair on multiple occasions, which began a feud between the two when the Kanellis’ (Kanelli?) tired of Zayn’s Larry Davidisms.

Also, you’re supposed to hate Mike and Maria, and they make it very easy to do so, but their theme is also amazing. Listen to the lyrics!

“When they ask if the fire is gonna eat us alive, I tell ‘em I think we'll be just fine."

Holy h*ck, you guys. That is the corniest writing and I adore it.

Why you should care: Sami Zayn is wonderful of course, but this is the true debut for Mike and Maria — they got to wrestle on this week’s SmackDown against Zayn a bit, but it was mostly just a way to show you that Maria is going to be helping Mike out however she can without getting the pair in trouble.

Poor Zayn is going to lose this feud to help get Mike and Maria going, but it’s okay, Sami: you’re still the greatest love the rest of us have ever known.

Charlotte Flair vs. Becky Lynch vs. Natalya vs. Tamina vs. Lana to determine the no. 1 contender to the SmackDown Women’s Championship

What am I looking at here? Lana lost to Naomi three times, each match faster than the last, and SmackDown didn’t figure out who was next in line since the only other thing the show got through for weeks was the story of Carmella winning the Money in the Bank briefcase, being stripped of that case, then winning it back. Now, Carmella is lurking in the shadows with her briefcase containing a guaranteed contract for a SmackDown Women’s title match, while the rest of the division fights each other in order to figure out the new number one contender for the same championship.

Why you should care: Lana and Tamina have something going on, with Tamina very protective of her new Russian friend — how will that play out in this every-woman-for-herself format? Otherwise, this should just be some fine wrasslin, as Charlotte, Becky, and Natalya are all a joy to watch for different reasons. This feels like Charlotte’s match to win so she can get another shot against Naomi that doesn’t come on the heels of her facing down a stable that formed with the sole purpose of keeping Charlotte from winning anything.

Now that Tamina seems focused on Lana, Carmella is off with her case, and Natalya is flying solo, Charlotte actually has a chance to defeat Naomi if she comes away victorious.

Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles (c) for the United States Championship

What am I looking at here? Two of WWE’s best, in a rematch from a Madison Square Garden house show where Styles took the title from Owens. WWE performs at MSG each year in a non-televised event where they try to create some moment to share with everyone who didn’t see it, and this time around, it was Styles shocking the arena with a title win over Owens.

Why you should care: The feud hasn’t been as good as it should be, since SmackDown has Owens doing some evil foreigner thing even though audiences already had plenty of non-cliche reasons to hate the guy, but at the same time, this is Kevin Owens vs. AJ Styles. The match itself is going to be good.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Baron Corbin

What am I looking at here? Baron Corbin interrupted Nakamura’s entrance at Money in the Bank last month, beating the hell out of the presumed favorite to the point the match started without Shinsuke in it. Nakamura would eventually return and set the match on fire by kneeing everyone in the face, but Corbin came away as 2017’s Mr. Money in the Bank, anyway.

Since then, Corbin and Nakamura have taken turns sneaking up on the other to attack them backstage, and now the pair get to take their frustrations out on each other in a ring.

Why you should care: Corbin has had tons of success in WWE in a relatively short span of time, and it’s for a reason. The dude is big, entertaining, and knows how to make this all look like it hurts. Nakamura is a different kind of challenge for him than he’s had in WWE to this point, and that works both ways, really: Nakamura has spent most of his time in WWE wrestling Dolph Ziggler or pinning Kevin Owens in tag matches.

Corbin is 6-foot-7 and more interested in throwing you into things and punching you in the face than performing flawlessly executed wrestling moves. Seeing how Nakamura responds to that should be worth your time.

This could also end up being a preview of a future match for the WWE Championship, considering Corbin has the men’s Money in the Bank briefcase already, and Nakamura showed up in the main event scene months ago and isn’t expected to leave it anytime soon.

The New Day vs. The Usos (c) for the SmackDown Tag Team Championships

What am I looking at here? The first title bout between these two on SmackDown was aggressive, hard-hitting, and also cut short once the Usos realized pinning New Day wasn’t going to be easy. Now, after weeks of singles matches and a rap battle decided by Wale thrown in for good measure, New Day gets their rematch and a chance to take the titles from the Usos before the champs can run away a second time.

Why you should care: New Day is great and all, and a victory here would set SmackDown’s tag scene up in a way that allows another heel team to rise to the top to face New Day, but the more intriguing option might come from New Day losing. If they can’t take down the Usos in their second chance, they might be done getting chances for a while. And if that’s the case, maybe we’ll see the popular group stay together (they should) but change their focus. Say, to Big E going after singles belts, perhaps?

Hey, New Day has talked about their desire for one of them to win a singles title and for the entire group to say they’re that champ, so why not?

John Cena vs. Rusev in a Flag Match

What am I looking at here? WWE took the returns of two of their most dynamic and talented performers and turned it into some bullshit 80s patriotism thing that no one cares about.

Why you should care: idk Bulgaria is America’s enemy or something even though that’s not true, just hope that Cena vs. Rusev in the ring is better than Cena vs. Rusev has been on the mic, though, how could it not be given the material the two had to work with?

Randy Orton vs. Jinder Mahal (c) for the WWE Championship in a Punjabi Prison match

What am I looking at here? I’m glad you asked! I made a brief video to explain this match earlier in the week and now I’m going to use it again here because recycling is the key to our survival. When I say “recycling,” am I talking about the planet, or this industry? Either way, the answer is yes!

If you don’t want to watch the video because the written word is still an integral part of your life and you don’t understand advertisers’ obsession with video or feel comfortable about the control they exert over the future of the written word, well, here you go.

Randy Orton wanted another rematch with Jinder Mahal, whose cronies attacked Randy’s father during their last title bout in order to draw Orton out of the ring and give Jinder time to recover. Shane McMahon said sure, that’s fine, but in the interest of fairness given Shane remembers that Orton is also the kind of guy to beat up a dad to get his way, Jinder gets to pick the stipulation. Mahal chose the Punjabi Prison match, which hasn’t been used in years, and Orton was all “what are you an idiot now your buddies can’t do your dirty work for you” as if Jinder and the Singh Brothers hadn’t already thought of a way to make sure they do interfere.

The Punjabi Prison is two bamboo cages reinforced by steel. There is a door to exit the first cage from, but eventually that is locked, and then climbing is the only way out, except there are spikes on the top of the cage. There might also be weapons lying around, and there are no rules, other than the thing about the doors locking and the need to climb over two cages in order to win. Those sound like rules, but who’s counting?

Why you should care: The feud has not been great, but the last Orton vs. Mahal match was pretty good, and seeing a non-terrible Punjabi Prison match is... well, it’s not a bucket list item since you could live without it, but like people doing stupid stunts just to see if they can survive them, finding out if a Punjabi Prison match can be good is just one of those things people need to know.

Also this match will end up setting up the fate of the WWE Championship for SummerSlam, since a Jinder victory could mean John Cena is coming for the heel wit the title, and an Orton win could send Baron Corbin down to the ring to cash in on an exhausted face as soon as Sunday.

[molliebalshawlevel4]

Models of Practice Research pt 3

Step 1: Develop Art Skills

When starting as an artist, it's important to practice as much as possible, experiment with a variety of media, and study examples of art. Books on basic, intermediate, and advanced techniques in many art forms can be found at bookstores and libraries to aid in practice. Instructional materials can also be found online, sometimes at no cost. Art colleges typically require a portfolio review in their admissions requirements, so it's essential that aspiring artists be able to demonstrate an understanding of basic art techniques and concepts.

Aspiring artists can take classes at local art and community centres. These classes can be beneficial in helping refine and develop artistic skills without the costs associated with college. Classes can also serve as a place to receive constructive criticism and portfolio assistance when applying for college.

Step 2: Earn a Degree

Fine artists usually don't need a college degree, but they can benefit from the experience and opportunities for professional development available in college. College art programs can also provide students with access to equipment and materials they may not have otherwise, such as printing presses or kilns. Some art schools are career-focused; others incorporate studio art classes into a liberal-arts curriculum. If an artist plans to be an art teacher or art director, higher education may be required. Fine Arts programs are available at the associate's, bachelors, and master's levels and, more rarely, at the doctoral level.

Success Tips:

Participate in an internship. Internships provide students with the chance to expand on the skills they learn in a classroom and gain valuable first-hand experience working in the field. Internships can also help artists network and form relationships that can be beneficial in the future. For example, an internship at an art gallery could later lead to that same gallery showcasing a student's artwork.

Take business and marketing courses. Since artists are often self-employed, training in business and marketing can help them promote and manage their work after graduation. If an artist plans to sell art directly to the public, these classes could be especially beneficial.

Step 3: Develop a Portfolio

As in most creative fields, a fine or visual artist is expected to develop a portfolio that demonstrates his/her capabilities to potential clients or employers. The purpose of a portfolio is to highlight the artist's best work, display a unique style, and show the direction in which the artist is working. Artists should have both hard copies and digital copies of their portfolios available.

+    http://study.com/becoming_an_artist.html

Despite the old adage, living as an artist–yes, a real fingers-in-the-paint kind of artist–is indeed a viable career option today.

The recession and low employment rate have left many Americans with no other option but to stray from conventional 9-5 jobs and forge alternative career paths.  For some, this may be a blessing in disguise, encouraging contemplation of a broader range of possibilities when it comes to generating income.  Working as a professional artist, getting the rent paid on time and going to sleep with a full stomach every night is feasible; it just takes some planning and preparedness.

Here are three keys to getting there, based on the expertise of seasoned artists:

1. Be Okay With Using Various Revenue Streams:

What feeds an artist’s income varies from case to case.  For instance, Sculptor A and Sculptor B technically have the same job title, but they may make money in completely different ways.  Perhaps Sculptor A plans to earn all of her income through public art commissions, while Sculptor B strives to rely exclusively on Web sales.

Artist and ArtBistro blogger Valerie Atkisson offers evidence that neither Sculptor A nor B are working toward the most cushy financial situation.  In her post, “How do Artists Make Money?” Atkisson shows how in a profession that often lacks traditional benefits and job security; it’s useful to rely on multiple sources of income, such as gallery showings, teaching positions, Web sales, commission projects and grants.

According to photographer Ken Gonzales-Day, dabbling in such an array of moneymaking pools allows artists to discover which methods are the most lucrative.  “It's very difficult for artists to make a living purely off artwork sales.  Sometimes they can get away with this for five years or so, but the demand is extremely unpredictable," he said.  Gonzales-Day is a professor of photography but he doesn't rely solely on that salary.  “I make about 25-30% of my income from other sources such as speaking gigs, public art commissions and publishing.  None of these generates a huge amount of money, but it all adds up," he explained.

Although it may be tempting to put all the eggs in one basket and go full throttle from the get-go–by opening a gallery, let’s say–it’s safer for starting artists to invest a little in a lot.  This way, if the gallery sales are weak, he or she still has multiple other sources of income to fall back on.  The downside?  The artist will have a much fuller plate.  The upside?  The artist has way more options.  If the potatoes are unpalatably undercooked, at least there’s still the turkey, stuffing and pie.

2. Be Weird:

Being outlandish is probably a bad idea at most jobs, but it’s an asset in this profession.  In her post “Why Weird Is Wonderful (And Bankable),” Forbes Contributor Jessica Hagy rather artistically draws, graphs and writes about the value in abnormality.  Hagy explains that the less normal something is, the more memorable it tends to be.

To sell art, it helps to grab the viewer's attention by creating works that are distinctly different from what already exists.  It's also smart for an artist to cultivate an aesthetic that is markedly his or her own.  Famed artists such as Picasso, Van Gogh, Degas, Monet, Warhol, and Close all have one thing in common: their works look nothing alike.  After seeing a few Picasso pieces, it’s easy to select which is the Picasso out of a bunch.  Such cohesiveness shows a level of control and deliberation that can be visually enticing.

As Gonzales-Day explained, "Artists who work to create a brand around their names will have more opportunities to engage in various projects."  If someone associates an artist's name with his or her distinguished style, invitations to work, speak and teach are more likely to ensue.

In a recent lecture entitled “How to Succeed as an Artist,” artist and career advisor Paul Klein emphasized the importance of being different.  He insinuated that distinctiveness generates sales–even more so than quality.  “Can’t all of us name artists who are doing really well monetarily; whose work we think sucks?”  The branded artist doesn't necessarily produce better work, but more bankable work.

3.  Have the Right Mindset

Passion and talent aren’t the only qualifications for becoming a professional artist.  It takes a certain type of person who accepts the unconventional challenges of this job.  They must be able to tolerate criticism of their work and posses the drive necessary to independently charter their own career paths.

Along with the complexities, this career has its advantages.  Most artists have full power over their business decisions, selling strategies and creative choices.  According to Gonzales-Day, living as an artist is an ongoing journey, both literally and figuratively.  “This spring I've already travelled to Paris, Santa Barbara, San Diego, Washington D.C. and Los Angeles for projects and events," he said, emphasizing travel as a major perk that comes with his profession.

With no clear road to reach success as an artist, it may be too structureless for some.  But for others, the flexibility is advantageous.  If the path of a lawyer is like a bamboo plant, an artist's is like ivy.  As anyone who's been to the English Countryside knows, ivy can flourish despite its unpredictable form.  In the words of Gonzales-Day: "It's an organic business model."

+    https://www.forbes.com/sites/rachelhennessey/2013/04/02/3-keys-to-making-it-as-an-artist-without-starving/#38343f6c2fac

How to build a career as an artist

Posted in: Finding a career, Networking February 6th, 2009

Here’s a post for all the people who are trying to be artists. It is not a friendly post. I do not think that people who want to create art need to get paid to do it. Do you get paid to have sex? No. Same thing. You love it, but you just do it after work. And sometimes, if you are driven mad by it, you leave work in the middle of the day for it.

Treat art the same way, and you will stay sane. Really. Here are five things I would nag you about if you were talking with me about your burgeoning career as an artist:

1. You cannot do art if you are starving.  The starving artist routine is total bullshit. I know because I did it. Once you know that you are not going to make rent, you can’t really make art. Because your sense of self-preservation insists that your brain focus on the possibility that you will be out on the street. Your brain cannot stop solving that problem long enough to solve the problem of what is truth and beauty.

Here are some things I did while I was becoming a writer: I ate only bagels because I didn’t have enough money for anything else and then I got anemic and had to go to the doctor but I didn’t have health insurance so I had to lie and say I did in order to get the iron pills I needed so that I didn’t pass out from exhaustion the moment I woke up in the morning. Believe me, I was not making great art during this period.

2. Art emanating from a black hole is a choice. There’s a reason that Jean-Michel Basquiat’s paintings look like horror films: Because his life was a crack-house horror film. And there’s a reason that Picasso is tearing apart voluptuous women in gorgeous surroundings: That’s what he did in real life.

So don’t kid yourself: Your art reflects your surroundings, and you can live like a pauper, but that limits the range of your art.

During my art days, I did not go out with friends. Ever. Because I didn’t even have enough money to go to a coffee shop. And I was always cold because I lived in Boston and didn’t have a winter coat. At many points I did not have a home, so I just sort of carried my laptop around and wrote and hoped that something would come up by the end of the day. And I almost never had clean clothes because I didn’t have money to buy detergent.

So I wrote stories, every day, about not seeing anyone, and my mentor would say things like, “How about adding a character so that the narrator can have a conversation?” And that would strike me as a revolutionary idea.

3. Real artists will make art no matter what. You do not need a studio, or a desk, or peace and quiet. Really. Because making art comes from a place that you cannot stop. People who need to make art make art no matter what.

Do you know how many blog posts I throw out? Maybe two a week. Because sometimes something happens and I absolutely have to write about it, and I see, from the beginning, that there’s no way I’ll be able to relate it to careers, so it’s going to end up in the blogging trash can. But I write it anyway.

Do you know Christo and Jeanne-Claude? Wait. Here, look at some photos. The guy is nuts. He thinks so big that it makes him crazy. He’s been making plans to put up cloth all over Central Park for 26 years. He can’t stop himself. Finally, he did it. But who knew if it would ever happen? This is what I mean. If you need to do art, you just go there. Nothing stops you.

So if you think you’re an artist and you are not making art now, but you think that in the right circumstance you’d make art, you are lying to yourself. I’m sorry. But it’s true. Unless you are starving. If you are starving, see point number one: You need to get a job.

4. You do not need to quit your day job. Are you making money and you’re wondering if you should quit your job to do art full time? Take this test: Did you marry rich? Do you have a trust fund? Do you have reliable buyers for almost everything you produce? If you did not answer yes to any of these, then keep your day job.

Don’t tell me it’s crushing your soul. This whole blog is about how your soul does not depend on your job or your boss or your paycheck. Click on some links and read them.

Also, most corporate jobs can be creative outlets because businesses solve problems. So if you are an inherently creative thinker, you probably bring that to whatever job you have. You can’t stop yourself.

5. You are not a better artist if you can do it full time. I don’t want to see snooty comments on this post about how great you are for being able to support yourself with your art. Because I can do that too. And you know what? I was not a worse writer when I could not support myself. The only difference between artists making money and artists not making money is that the first group is better at business. And there is no evidence that artists who are better at business make better art.