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#i made this forever ago and didn't post
hellolulu · 1 month
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Damian + Jon: [playing Minecraft]
Dami: I've secured us some suitable living conditions. We will be safe from enemies now.
Jon: nice oneeeee now help me mine for iron plz you need armor so bad noob
Dami: don't call me that. I've killed people in real life.
Jon: ya ok noob
Dami: 😡😡
(some time later, when they return to the house) (to paint the scene: it is small, square in shape, and it's obvious Damian had no idea how to build a proper house, since a lot of it is made with dirt, which is a very convenient block but makes for an ugly.. ugly build)
Jon: aren't you like.. into art? Why did you build it with dirt??
Dami: it's about functionality right now, for safety. Tomorrow I will begin renovations. Obviously.
Jon: right..
[they enter the house. There is a chest, a crafting table, a furnace, and a double-bed at the side of the room]
Jon: omg... you put our beds together?? Omg I knew you loved me 😭😭😭😭 woooow 😭😭😭😭
Damian: [immediately breaks one of the beds to move it away to the other wall] now you've made it weird. It was for convenience.
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daisyswift3 · 5 months
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I Think There's Been a Glitch
GUYS I just realized sth crazy while watching this tiktok….I think the reason Taylor has red hair in so many mvs is bc it’s a play on the term RED HERRING. Red HAIR(RING). TTPD itself was a red herring and ends w the manuscript which is basically just the all too well short film (from RED TV) which she has red hair in. The glitches. Error 321. Bad BLOOD mv where she has red hair. THE RED BLOOD MOON. CHAOS 🫚 ANON = GINGER = RED HEAD = GLITCH. Glitching back to the 1989 era??…..
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IT'S A CLOCK, IT CAN HELP YOU TELL TIME. She literally told us her entire plan all the way back in 2022. If the midnights vinyls make a clock that counts down to midnight then we’ve officially reached the “blood moon glitch” stage. I'm assuming 1, 2, 3 error/TPD (if you reverse the website glitch) was the moonstone vinyl so now we're at 4, 5, 6 the blood moon vinyl. The Jan 4 🫚 message tells us that we should be counting from 1-10 and not backward. And this means the final act ends in October AKA Halloween AKA pumpkin anon. "Frivolous, tenfold, 3 desires And until the clock strikes midnight Light the ground with fires." Seeing how each vinyl is a quarter of the clock and TTPD (the glitch/red blood moon/red herring) was released in April, I think it's safe to assume each quarter represents 1/4 of a year or 3 months. Which means 2025 or New Year's Day would be Midnight. So perhaps a kaylor reunion in Oct and an official coming out around Dec-Jan. This aligns w another interesting anon message we received abt New Year's Day being when an atomic bomb would go off (volcano anon?). "The real drama, the heartbreaking beauty of it all, unfolds not in a grand finale, but in the quiet unraveling. The magician's greatest illusion is the one you choose not to see." Shits abt to get crazy
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Throwback to my very first zhongzhu art 🥲
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daarkous · 1 year
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midnight show
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doublism · 4 months
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twin fantasy + the double (2013)
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ask-the-dweets · 1 year
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An interaction between Pizza and David, a while after he returned from being a killer and reconnected/reconciled with David. 
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keeps-ache · 5 months
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HEY
#art#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#oc#pink space#i really like the subtract glitch i've been doing recently - so here's some of that again lol :3#the way it interacts with their palettes is so fun i like it a lot ehegh :33#//anyway do you ever consider just tossing out any part the human body you've learned to draw and just drawing dumb little guys with arms#like pipecleaners forever or what hfhs#//oh this is was doobled in traditional originally#i need to digitize more of these. Because#though aura's hair was more extreme in the second panel in that version - i'm tired though and 3 days ago it was the same so no feelings to#change that lol :)#also i didn't shrink the noise enough so it didn't look right - and i was not going to reimport it so Bon Voyage my dude hfhs#was Supposed to fit on a 900x900 canvas but i made the panels a liiiiitle bit too big so it's 950x950#which is Fine it's a round number but it's not a Round-Round number so [gesturing]#1000x1000 was way too big for this little thing so she sits at a pleasant halfway point :>#//anyway i was also up til 3 a.m. last night doing ?? something ?? i genuinely don't even know what lmfhsbvh#nice though maybe my brain'll get a reset lol :3#stay up really late some random nights and jumpstart your brain!! it's foolproof!! never fails!! [<- these statements have not been reviewe#by the FDA or the Center for Sleep Control]#//ANywho now i'm going to be on my way#/oh i also forgot to post the oath n aura refs i made for artfight lol-#i'll prolly put those up w/ the kira and hid ones though :>>#i like to have the whole ensemble :D i Do feel bad when one of them gets left out hghsfh - like forgetting a stuffed animal somewhere#even though they're all together for small portion of the story it still feels off lol#i should prolly introduce the rest of the cast at some point. .... ......... ..........hm yea prolly. maybe one day hfhs#//anyway NOW i'm going i've run out of tag space i think hfhs - toodles !! :>
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butterflieswhisper · 5 months
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hhelp wait this is so funny. didnt you follow me forever ago after a scott themed october song analysis . sorry if you dont remember that and this ask doesnt make sense but this is still funny to me
hi!!!! yeah. it was the cherri crane lives art i think and also where you made your flower husbands tag! I have never really interacted with fh outside of you (and like, seeing pretty fanart) but i am nonetheless deeply invested in your interpretation specifically!!! I honestly haven't watched jimmy outside of rats and the beginning of empires2 either i genuinely have no clue what they get up to you just seem to have a lot of fun with it
#asks#<-omg i can make that a tag now#i also am a year behind on the life series. i think the most recent one i've seen is double#like from any pov. i am a year behind. however that goes for everything on youtube#my poor watch later playlist hit the 5000 video limit forever ago and so did the second one i made to replace it. i am on my third#but seriously i don't know what goes on in fh canon but i like their blue/yellow thing they have going on. idk if that's like? intentional?#but like scott blue and canary yellow are really pretty colors together#and they are also SO close to being complimentary colors and yet. they aren't. just a little bit off#they don't quite fit quite how they should. i made that up on the spot i mostly think yellow and blue are nice colors#i think my biggest exposure to scott before you was literally the deal with destiny song in empires1#and i don't even think i acknowledged him as like a real guy ykwim.#like oh yeah. scott smajor. he's like. in that song lizzie made or something. he can sing alright i guess (plays it on loop)(plays it on lo#whisp whispers#seeing u post about Discourse(tm) is always really funny to me because i didn't realize for a while that u did not have like#the 'normal' interpretation? like i didn't realize you had a different view than other people#i was like oh yeah the relationship held in the death games is toxic. that makes sense yeah and is not surprising#and then suddenly there would be a post where you mention discourse and i went. Ohhhhh wait they're supposed to be HAPPY!!!#but i feel like this is infinitely more enjoyable i love Flawed Characters#and especially now after watching his rats. i get it. i get it i get it i see what you are saying#he doesn't interact much with jimmy hes mostly with owen and. i mean#'i've never heard someone apologize so much while putting the blame on the other person'???? i see exactly what you mean#r!scott accidentally hurting r!owen and then apologizing profusely while insisting it's because owen stood in his way. and then immediately#isolating himself in a room for like 20 minutes and refusing to interact with anyone feels like. idk#it reminds me of ur rambles and i understand them more now i think. kind of#to be clear by 'with' i mean like. in proximity of. those rats are AROMANTIC!!!!! (to me)#i'm so sorry these tags are a mess. but alas#i also think it's really funny to follow Flower Husbands guy and know nothing abt them. invested by proxy. whenever i hear abt scott giving#jimmy a flower i get excited not because like i know what's going on but because omg! that's like that thing bree talks about sometimes!!#i hope that like. any of this makes sense shdbfjk
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swift-kwikster · 9 months
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Can you put TW's on your pregnant Sam posts it's triggering my tokophobia I'm not trying to be rude it's just annoying i keep seeing it in my feed despite blocking tags such as mpreg or t-preg
Hey of course I'll trigger tag it as pregnancy, I'm really sorry they kept popping up for you. Don't call trans men pregnancy mpreg ever though, at least don't do that when talking to me please. Same with 't-preg', would appreciate if that term isn't used when speaking with me either.
If you're only triggered by trans pregnancy, then please block this blog. No hard feelings with that. I'm not gonna trigger tag trans pregnancy specifically. You can't control your triggers and I respect that, please protect yourself. However this is my blog as well and I'm not gonna treat trans pregnancy as another category on here, on here it's the same as if it was cis people going through that too so I'm only gonna use the one tag. If this is from dysphoria, I'm really sorry. Just block and curate your online experiences when it comes to how people go about their own bodies. Not mad at you, just offering advice and being honest.
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lenteur · 10 months
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random thoughts about tell me that you love me, episode five
(the rest is under the cut because i'm worried about your eyes having to read ALL OF THAT and this post might contain spoilers)
I feel like this is becoming a recurring motif in my posts about the drama but I'm in love with the leads. They're both so caring and thoughtful. The fact they're there for each other and are witnessing the other evolve. My heart feels warm. They're one of the best things to happen to this show.
Jin woo focusing on mo eun's acting <3 I'd love it if the drama showed more scenes like the one where he came to support her at the theater. I think he could become an asset to mo eun's acting career because he can't hear so he's only focusing on the facial expressions/body language part of acting. A good actor is someone who can make you feel things even when you don't relate/know what they're talking about. A good actor is someone who doesn't need a lot of words to make you understand what they're feeling. So I can see mo eun showing her acting to jin woo as a rehearsal coach. You know asking him what he felt when he saw her acting, what he thinks she's talking about, etc. That'd be great if the drama gave us some of these moments in the future.
It might not seem like a lot but I'm happy to see the other actors congratulate mo eun on her acting. Knowing how hard she worked and how many rejections she had to go through, I'm relieved to see people believe in her and praise her for her splendid acting
It's so cute how she immediately ran to him after being congratulated by her colleagues. You can see how much she values him and his opinion. Just like he was able to calm her down before she started the play, she wants to ask him for his opinion. The more I watch them together, the more I ship them.
Girl we're not even ten minutes into the episode and I'm on the verge of writing a love letter to the main couple. They are made for each other.
"You're a good listener" because he always tries to focus on each word that comes out of her mouth. He makes efforts to make her feel understood and I think that's beautiful.
"It feels like you're listening to my heart, not my voice" OH COME ON!!! TAKE MY HEART TAKE MY EVERYTHING IF THAT'S WHAT YOU NEED BUT I DON'T NEED TO BE CRYING ON A THURSDAY/FRIDAY NIGHT AT 12 AM
"To me, you're a comfortable person"
The fact that after watching the play, jin woo wished he could hear makes me cry a little bit (ngl)
The whole confrontation with the parents scene... I am torn because I understand both sides.
The parents are worried for her because becoming an actress (and an artist in general) is really hard and only a few manage to make a living out of it. Even less people manage to become super popular and earn lots of money. So yeah, I know the parents want the best for her and don't want her to think about how to make ends meet. However, that doesn't mean it's okay to be so judgemental towards their own daughter. They looked like they were on the verge of disowning her because of her choice of career. The mother saying mo eun is immature for pursuing her dream career, that's rich. I mean your daughter has spent most of her life following what YOU wanted her to do. It's normal for mo eun to be fed up with this and decide to live her life the way she wants. The worst part is when her mother said she'll never make it because she's too old for that career (which is true because as most artistic jobs, your image is a crucial part) but had the nerve to oppose to mo eun when she wanted to study theater and movie (or something like that i don't remember the exact terms) at uni. I'm just disappointed by the parents' reaction but I can understand where they come from.
On mo eun's part, I just can't imagine how she's feeling after all that happened. She wanted to tell them first she decided to become an actress, but unfortunately her role as an extra was shown on tv. She was robbed of telling her parents the truth. Like she said, it wasn't an impulsive decision. She thought long and hard about it and decided to do it in the end. She kept a false front in front of her parents because she's always followed their advice so she was scared of their reaction to the whole actress thing. And she was right. Mo eun is already feeling guilty about her decision. She doesn't want to worry her parents. I feel for her.
What made my blood boil is how the brother sided with the parents. He knew all along but then when the truth was out, he was the first one to drop mo eun and act shocked by her choice of career. I don't know a lot about their relationship but I thought he'd at least try to defend her a little bit. Guess I was wrong. Sigh
Ji yu and mo d am's bickering is one of the most hilarious things ever,
Mo eun's face lighting up when she saw name (jin woo can be funny when he wants to lol naming his cat name). She's just like me.
Ji yu is a great friend. She's happy for mo eun's success, she's worried about her because she knows mo eun has a hard time dating someone. I'm glad ji yu is there for mo eun.
Song seo kyung's arrival. The plot thickens. I can't wait to learn more about the fire and how the situation will be resolved.
Overall this is a great episode, I'm giving this a 9/10
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imwritesometimes · 2 years
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trina, dana, cori if ur all out there. somewhere. girlies. I hope ur having a good day ✌️💕
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thatnewweeb · 2 months
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Childhood Sweethearts | Bakugo Katsuki
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Summary | You moved to America when you were young, having to leave behind your childhood sweetheart. After moving back to Japan, you'll find out if things have changed between you two
Content | Fluff, honestly I can't think of any warnings for this so let me know if you see anything that needs a warning
Word Count | 1.7k+
A/N | I love the idea of Bakugo being in love with someone through his whole life, I have no idea why. At the time of posting, I wrote this forever ago
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It had been almost 5 whole years since you moved away. You missed home. It wasn't like you'd wanted to move away in the first place, but your dad's job took you away from Japan all the way to America.
Finally, at 18 years old, you finally convinced your parents to allow you to move home. Having attended an elite hero school for the past 2 years, you managed to have some special arrangements made for your return home.
And so, that is how you got to where you are now, nervously walking down the halls of UA next to Principal Nezu. He had spent the first half hour of the morning before classes began showing you around and explaining a few things to you.
At the start of homeroom at 8:25AM, he walks you to the classroom of Class 3-A, the class you will be joining, starting today.
Everyone looks over as the door opens, the principal strolling in and standing at the front of the class. You follow nervously. These people have had nearly 3 whole years to get to know each other, and here you are, the new girl joining in the final year, not knowing anyone.
At least, you didn't think you knew anyone, until you force yourself to look at the class properly.
Your eyes immediately fall on a blond boy in the second row. His own eyes are widened, locked onto you. A moment later, you rip your eyes away from him, prompting him to look away also.
When you realise Nezu has stopped speaking and is now looking at you, you snap out of it and look at the whole class.
"My name is Y/N. I have two Quirks, which I am sure I will have more time sometime soon to explain. I look forward to spending this year with you." You say and bow slightly to the class.
Your homeroom teacher, Aizawa, points you to your assigned seat, so you sit down quietly, not saying another word.
It isn't until lunch, almost four hours later, that you say anything else, besides answering questions in class. Your fourth period was English with Present Mic. Having lived in an English-speaking country for almost 5 years, it was quite an easy class for you.
Almost as soon as you are dismissed from class, you're surrounded by people, wanting to talk to you, get to know you. You're fine with that, but you did have someone else you wanted to talk to. They already walked out the door though.
"Y/N!" Someone says, popping up in front of you out of nowhere.
"Izuku!" You smile, excitedly throwing your arms around your old friend.
You see a brown-haired girl blushing as she watches you hugging Midoriya.
"I can't believe you're here! I didn't know you were coming back!"
You nod. "I know, I'm sorry I didn't say anything."
He shakes his head, wanting to reassure you. "It's okay! We fell out of touch, that's not anyone's fault."
Izuku invites you to spend lunch break with him and his friends, being introduced to them all, him explaining a little about how he got into UA at all.
After classes have finished for the day, you don't give Bakugo the chance to run. As soon as you're dismissed from class, you walk over to his desk, standing in front of it and resting your hands on the surface.
"It's nice to see you again, Katsuki." You smirk.
He looks up at you from his chair briefly, quickly looking away. “Yeah, it is.”
You lean down so you’re closer to his height, him still avoiding eye contact. “Would you mind walking me back to the dorm? I haven’t actually been there yet, Nezu didn’t have time to take me.”
He tuts but stands up, picking up his bag and slinging it over your shoulder. Not saying a thing, he leaves the classroom, you following him. You know what he’s like, you know to follow.
As soon as you're out of the halls and outside, he decides to say something. "I didn't know you were coming back." He mutters.
You're just happy to hear him say something to you. "Yeah. I know."
He takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry."
You pause where you are, stunned. You hadn't expected him to apologise to you.
When you don't say anything, he sighs and turns to you, also stopping walking. "I shouldn't have stopped responding. I was upset you were gone, and I went about things in the stupidest way. I... I regret it."
It takes a moment for you to say anything, blinking in shock. "It's okay." You smile brightly up at him. "I understand. It was hard on both of us, after all."
"Yeah, but I ghosted you. I shouldn't have done that. Not to you, you don't deserve that."
"I agree you shouldn't have done it, dummy. But I'm saying I understand, okay?"
He smiles a little, looking down at you. "Come on, let's go to the dorms." He tugs on your backpack, indicating that you should take it off. When you do, he slings one strap over his shoulder, carrying it for you.
"Since when did you become a gentleman?" You ask with a small laugh, making him grunt a 'shut up' to you, his cheeks going slightly pink.
Finally reaching the dorms, Bakugo opens the door for you, letting you into the large building.
Everyone else is already there, the people in the communal area looking at you as you enter. Other than Izuku, people seem a little surprised to see you with Bakugo, and even more surprised that he doesn't look as annoyed as he typically does.
With everyone staring, Katsuki shoves your bag back into your arms before walking over to the stairs to go to his room.
You smile a little as you watch him, shaking your head.
Izuku is the first person to come up to you, smiling. "Everyone wants to get to know you a little. If you have some time, come sit with us?"
You do what he says, walking over and taking a seat between him and a boy with a black streak in mostly blond hair.
You end up spending a couple hours with them, telling them about your Quirk and what it's like to live in America. When they ask about you seemingly already knowing both Izuku and Katsuki, you tell them that you grew up with them.
A girl with pink skin, who you learn is Mina, asks you for some stupid stories about them as kids, Izuku going red and telling you that you don't have to talk about anything you don't want to, trying to save himself the embarrassment.
Even though you're unsure if Bakugo will be annoyed at you for telling them this, you also tell them a few stories from when you and him were dating before you left for America.
Everyone seems surprised, a small uproar coming from the class. No one had ever even seen an indication that he had ever been interested in anyone, yet alone had a girlfriend. It appeared to be a ludicrous idea to most of them.
Kaminari seems to deflate a little upon realising you dated one of his best friends. Guess he thought you were pretty.
Not long after, you go find your room, needing to unpack. Right before you close the door, a foot stops it from closing. A second later, Bakugo comes into view.
"Well, hello there." You smirk a little, looking up at him.
He smirks back, placing a hand on the doorframe, standing in front of you. "Hey. Care if I come in?"
You move out the way for him to come in but tell him it's a little messy because you're still unpacking.
He doesn't even look at the room, closing the door as soon as he's inside and standing close to you, essentially pinning you between him and the door.
That's when you really realise how much he's changed. He's so much taller now than when you last saw him, his shoulders broader, entire body more muscular, a few visible scars now. The whole thing makes you a little flustered.
"So, do you have a little American boyfriend now?" He asks with a slight snarl, expression turning into a smirk as soon as you shake your head. "No? Then, would you mind if I kissed you?" He whispers in your ear.
You don't verbally respond, but the look on your face gives him the answer he needs. He keeps one hand on the wall, the other coming to rest on your waist, leaning in and pressing his lips against yours. Your own hands find your way to his chest, gripping onto his shirt.
A moment later, he pulls away a little, smirking. "Guess we haven't missed a beat, huh?"
You laugh, not letting go of his shirt. "Suki, you're an ass." You say, making him laugh too.
"Yeah, but you love it." He whispers, leaning in to kiss you again. "It's starting to get late, and you haven't finished unpacking yet. If you wanted to stay in my room tonight, you're welcome to."
You look up at him, a little surprised by the proposal. When he sees the look on your face, he panics a small amount. "I didn't mean it like that! I meant we can spend the night sleeping together- no, not sleeping together! Not like that! I just meant- we- we can- I meant-"
You giggle at his nervousness, making him look a little angry. You move your hands to rest on his cheeks, standing on your tiptoes and smashing your lips against his.
When you finally break the kiss again, both a little breathless, he stares at you, mouth open slightly.
"Sorry, I had to find a way to shut you up." You smile. "I'd love to cuddle tonight, Suki."
He looks relieved, taking your hand. "Come on, let's go."
You spend the rest of the night in Bakugo's dorm, cuddling and eventually falling asleep in his bed.
Before he falls asleep, he spends a few moments just watching you, barely being able to believe that he got lucky enough to get you back into his life. He gives you a soft kiss on the forehead, holding you tighter, closing his own eyes and falling asleep.
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hedgehog-moss · 2 months
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The first episode of our shearing saga ended with Poldine being freed and happily running towards her family (who, let me remind you, had abandoned her and refused to provide any emotional support during her first ever shearing.)
I followed her, hoping to snap pictures of a heartwarming family reunion. Which didn't happen. Poldine's mum and grandma mostly looked perplexed.
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Then horrified.
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Poldine was, understandably, driven to existential despair by her mother's reaction to her new haircut.
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Needless to say, when I tried to catch Pampérigouste to shear her, it was next to impossible. She knew what awaited her and wouldn't go anywhere near me, even when I made the Muesli Whistle (which usually draws a Pavlovian response out of her), even when I threw a handful of actual muesli in her direction to attract her. If anything she looked vexed that I could think she was no smarter than a pigeon.
But I have a PhD in catching Pampe. I decided to try something I'd never tried before: lie in wait by the watering hole like a hyena. You see, there's a gate near the water trough that can open all the way in either direction, and I figured I could simply trap my llama between the gate and a tree.
I waited, I waited, and eventually, finally, Pampe got thirsty.
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Once she was trapped behind the gate it was very easy to halter her, and then she grumpily followed me to the corral, where I tied her to a post to shear her.
As soon as I switched on the electric shears, she freaked out. She reared up like a wild stallion, started foaming at the mouth, desperately pulling on the rope, it was awful! I tried to turn on the shears some distance away then get progressively closer when she got used to the noise, but she didn't get used to the noise. I tried to sing her favourite protest song over the noise, I tried everything; she kept acting like I was an exorcist and she was possessed by a swarm of demons. Eventually I thought I should just start shearing and get it over with as quickly as possible.
Pampe was so good with the llama shearer two years ago! She was perfectly calm and relaxed! She didn't care at all about the noise of the shears even when they were right behind her ears!! What is the explanation for this?
(when I expressed surprise at her good behaviour with the shearer back then, someone said she reminded them of the type of brat who's well-behaved with their teacher at school but insufferable with their parents)
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Pampoldine stayed right next to her mum the whole time her ordeal lasted. Poldine, you are too good for this world.
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These are my only two photos of Pampe being shorn, because my photographer was busy trying to soothe her by petting her, or distract her by offering her a hazel branch to eat. At some point Pampe tried to lie down and play dead, which made shearing her neck complicated, so my photographer was promoted (or demoted?) to Llama Scaffolding—she had to lean against Pampe with all her weight to prevent her from lying down. The last time I'd seen a llama play dead was when Pyrgus was sent away, which was pretty heartbreaking...
(Pampe possibly expected to receive the same amount of sympathy, but we had to remind her that Pyrgus was a child being separated from his mother forever while she was an adult getting a haircut.)
Since I sheared her as fast as I could, Pampe looks worse than her daughter—much less smooth, with some remaining woolly spots here and there that I wasn't able to go back to because she kept shaking her head, kicking her feet, squirming and generally acting like she was being tortured. It's now clear to me that she was only well-behaved last time out of spite, because I'd warned the shearer that I had one Difficult Llama. I sort of already suspected it at the time:
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Please note that as soon as I released her, all the fuss and drama ended. In an instant. I thought she was going to jump away from me when I took off her halter, and run like hell, or stand there shaking from stress, but no—she ate a few hazel leaves from the branch (no longer panting, no longer drooling) then scratched her neck with her back hoof looking very composed, then trotted away lightly and happily.
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autolenaphilia · 10 months
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Edit: as hoshi9zoe pointed out, the original version of this post needlessly berated other transfems like Jennifer Coates, for which I do apologize, and I have toned it down in this edited version. The original version survives in reblogs.
Some months ago, I was searching through this transandrobro blog to see if they posted a callout of me, and i found this reblog, which I couldn't really write about for months, because what do I even write. I recently wayback machined it for posterity, and I guess this is my attempt to write a post about it.
It's saint-dyke himself, the coiner of transandrophobia, saying that the infamous (at least for me) article "I am a transwoman. I'm in the closet. I'm not coming out" is what made him coin the fucking word. It's literally bolded and underlined: "Reading this article is what made me coin “transandrophobia”.
The reason I put off writing this post is that reading that article makes me feel like i'm drinking poison. And it is poison, make no mistake, it's internalized transmisogyny brainworms dripping out of the writer's brain and onto the page.
It's a justification for why the author, known by pseudonym Jennifer Coates, doesn't want to transition, despite knowing she is a trans woman. And it's the exact kind of internalized transmisogyny that keeps trans women in repression and not transitioning. "I'm not going to pass, i'm forever going to be an ugly freak who will at best be humored by other women, the closet is uncomfortable but at least it's safe"
It's the same exact bullshit a lot of represssed trans women tell themselves because it's what society tells us about trans women, that we are freakish parodies of women, that we will never pass, and if we don't pass we have failed and are ugly freaks. It's all to scare us into staying in the closet and make others hate and fear us. Transmisogyny permeates our society, and the majority, maybe all transfems will absorb and internalize some of it.
Coates says that it all is just applicable to her, but again so many transfems believe this shit before transitioning and realizing it's a pack of lies. If this bullshit was in any way valid, a lot of trans women shouldn't transition, because before we actually transition many of us believe it word for word. And "it's only true for me" is how we justify it to ourselves. We tend to be way harsher on ourselves than others. This kind of self-hating transfem tends to think: "Other trans women are beautiful graceful goddesses, earthly manifestations of the divine feminine, always destined to be women, while I'm an ugly forever male ogre who just has a fetish."
It's all bullshit, it's poison, it's internalized transmisogyny.
And the rest of the article is bullshit too. It is not some insightful mediation on gender as some people say, it's the author confusing and mixing up actual transmisogyny with an imagined problem of misandry. She does this because she has gone full repression mode, and decided she has no other choice to live as a man, so her dysphoria and experiences of transmisogyny are actually men's problems.
It's a bad article, excusable because as Coatas points out, it's "essentially a diary entry." that was meant to be a way to "vent frustration" and she "did not intend for anyone else to actually read it." It is clearly not the product of a healthy mind.
I hope the author sometime in the past seven years eventually did transition, and that for whatever reason she didn't want to publicly repudiate her own article. Maybe she lost access to the medium account so she can't delete it.
Far worse than the article itself is the response to it. I've seen it passed around as some insightful commentary on gender by the "feminists are too mean to men, misandry is real" crowd. I have argued against this before. And other people have made insightful comments about it.
And learning that saint-dyke claiming that he was inspired to coin the word "transandrophobia" because of this article is the cherry on top of this shitcake of transmisogyny. For my thoughts on "transandrophobia" theory and how transmisogynistic it is, see here.
Of course, Saint-dyke absolutely could be bullshitting here. Claiming that Coates's article is what inspired him to coin the word might be a lie to claim that transandrophobia theory is not transmisogynistic because it came from listening to trans women.
This is why "listen to trans women" doesn't work. Because TME people will always choose a trans woman who confirms their prejudices. Blair White has made an entire career out of this. And Coates article is popular because it says that misandry is real and trans women's issues are partly caused by it, misgendering herself and other trans women.
And it's popular for another reason. Coates has thoroughly internalized transmisogyny, and thus her article presents a trans woman that is exactly as transmisogynistic patriarchal society wants her to be. She is suffering, but ultimately accepts her assigned role. She truly believes that her biological sex dooms her to forever be male. She literally "manages her dysphoria by means other than transition" as conversion therapy advocates want us to do. She never makes an social claim on womanhood by actually transitioning, so she doesn't invade the sacred women's spaces. Yet she performs the role of woman perfectly by serving men, by defending them from supposed feminist misandry. And she fulfils the ritualistic role that the rhetorical figure of "trans women" sometimes serves in progressive spaces, of giving a blessing to TME people's pre-existing views and actions, all while actual flesh-and-blood trans women are destroyed by those same deeply transmisogynistic spaces. This time it's a blessing for the same "misandry is real" soft-MRA bullshit that has infested the online left and created the transandrophobia crowd.
That is why this article and the positive response makes me sick, makes me feel like i'm drinking poison. This is what its fans want trans women to be like. I'm acutely aware this kind of self-denial is exactly what transmisogyny wants from me and tried to indoctrinate me into doing it. And I want none of it. I want to live, I want to be a woman.
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danadaria · 2 months
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Steddie Olympic AU where Eddie gets on his first Olympics for BMX freestyle, and it's so weird because he has been in competitions for many years but nothing like this, something so big and with so many rules.
His background was being a hyperkinetic kid who didn't really care about his life, and somehow being fearless and doing acrobatics became his career. Still, even then it wasn't so serious.
His thing were the X-games and open exhibitions, with fire, hard rock & metal, tattoos, and having RedBull as a sponsor.
Behind the adrenaline he and his friends are a bunch of clowns who just wanted to fly and have the bones of a child forever.
But now he's here: in the middle of a giant line in an ocean of other athletes, wearing a fucking blazer from Ralph Lauren and with the lamest jeans he had to wear in his entire life.
And everything is kinda awful, because he lost sight of friends (Gareth and Max, both skaters, but they train in the same place), and he just heard there's no McDonald's at the Olympics this year.
He doesn't even like McDonald's so much, but god, he grow up hearing about athletes eating hundreds of burgers and mcnuggets for free, and sue him, but his inner child was super excited about it.
"Are you ok, man?"
Eddie opens his mouth to give a snarky remark when he sees the most beautiful man in existence – GORGEOUS v-shape, honey eyes, pink pouty lips, and kissable moles– looking at him with concern.
"Yeah, yeah. Everything is okey-dokey" He says lamely.
The most beautiful man in existence snorts at him.
"Okey-dokey? What are you? Five?"
"Probably. I was sad because I found out today there's no free McDonald's this year. Now that I know I'm not sure if it is worth being here"
Eddie's future husband looks surprised for a second and laughs at him.
"Are you serious?"
"Of course. I read some people ate so many nuggets they left the Olympics cackling like a chicken: I wanted to be one of them!"
"Oh, yeah. I ate lots of them post-competition"
"See?!"
"Ok, I give you that. But this year there's going to be international cuisine and all that jazz"
"Knowing me, I'm going to get too overwhelmed with the options and I'll end with the saddest oatmeal every day."
"You have lots of food opinions for someone that's on a sports event"
"Well, is either that or thinking that my biggest rivals are a bunch of 15-year-olds from Brazil and Japan."
"Oh? What's your sport?"
"BMX freestyle"
"That's the race in the mountains?"
"That's literally BMX racing."
"Right." He looked ashamed.
Eddie needed to fix that look, now.
"And you? What's your poison?"
"Poison? You mean my sport?" Eddie nods at him encouragingly. "Gymnastics."
"I can see it." Eddie looks at him approvingly, "You have the arms of a gymnast, big boy."
The face of Eddie's future husband turns a beautiful shade of red. And Eddie is just a second away to ask for his name, and his number to change the course of his life, when he feels a hand on the jacket's collar.
"Here you are, loser. We need to go this way!"
And before Eddie can say anything, Max Mayfield (his new arch-nemesis) takes him away from the love of his life.
He says bye with a hand before being cruelly separated, disappearing into a sea of people.
"Do you want to be murdered before or after the opening ceremony, Red?"
"Oh, shut up loser."
____________________________________________________________
Steve is going back with his best friend to their apartment, feeling super frustrated. Somehow, 24 hours ago, he thought it would be a good idea to give his phone to his best friend for the inauguration night to avoid getting too excited and watching videos of the event until 4 am.
And now he was regretting ALL his life choices.
"You don't understand Robin, I met a super cute guy, but I couldn't get his name! I'm only going to search that and nothing else"
"Steve, you made me swear I wouldn't pass your phone on inauguration day, no matter the reason. You need to sleep"
"Easy for you to say. You didn't meet someone when you didn't have your phone!"
"I would understand better than anyone! I met the cutest girl competing at air riffle, aaaand I didn't have my phone either!"
"You gave her your presentation card, didn't you"
"Yes, sorry."
"See? Why didn't you make me buy some for me, too?"
They arrive at their floor. Steve knows they're a little obnoxious, but it was the first night and it's still early.
"Good night, neighbors! Isn't it too early in the event to be fighting?"
Steve looks up so fast, he probably hurt his neck a little bit. At the end of the hallway, sitting on the floor next to a very closed door, was Steve's meet-cute: All smiley, charming, and inviting.
"It's you!"
"Oh! Hi Mr. Gymnastics, and hi unknown lady."
"It's Robin Buckley," She says and goes straight to her apartment, "we probably going to see each other again, so good night".
And she closes the door firmly behind her.
"I didn't have. I mean. I don't have my phone to search for you."
The other boy looks at him, almost evaluating him, before giving Steve a big smile and offering his hand to stretch.
"Eddie Munson."
"Steve Harrington."
"So, would you-"
"There's a McDonald's near where I compete tomorrow. Would you like to go with me?"
Eddie stands up and walks until he's in front of Steve. He smiles.
"Would love it. After all, it was my childhood dream."
Steve smiles too.
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marxy-06 · 1 year
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Favorites Fic Recs 4
was supposed to post this a long time ago but tumblr didn't save...this got a little long, apologies (or you're welcome?)
Kim Seokjin
Replacement (@akinnie75)
The truth untold (@vminity21)
The flower bridge (@yoongsisbae)
Fall for me (@ebonyinktea)
Cinnamon bliss (@yoonia)
Glazed and dazed (@floralseokjin)
Voix (@yoonia)
With you (@yoonpobs)
I'm all yours (@sailoryooons)
Smile (@shuadotcom)
Scar kisses (@girl8890)
No pyjamas (@jinkookspencil)
Min Yoongi
No more (@gyukult)
Chocolate opal (@babesindestroyland)
Changing one's tune (@1uckygold)
Before you go (@sweetcarrotsandroses97)
Perfect for me (@7dipity)
Ps, is it okay if I start calling you dad (@btsficsandsuch)
The third & sixth (@jimlingss)
Insecurities (@taetae-mic)
Performance evaluation (@kookscrescent)
Tricks of the trade (@stutterfly)
I'll protect you (@glassbangtan)
My miss right (@lavenjoon)
Step up (or step out) (@hollyhomburg)
Never, never fall (@joheunsaram)
The seven year itch (@jimlingss)
The sweetest thing (@illneverrecover)
Ink petals (@yminie)
Quiet and qualms (@sugafreeagustd)
Illicit favors (@yoongiofmine)
Jung Hoseok
Outro: love is not over (@kiirokero)
Heaven sent (@aquagustd)
Sunshower (@jimlingss)
Unconditionally (@rmsrkive)
Kim Namjoon
The stand in (@yoonia)
The making of: Love (@inkjam-moon)
Easy, like sunday morning (@angelguk)
Inside my mind (@jimlingss)
Park Jimin
Into the wilderness (@gukyi)
Darling you're beautiful (@choking-on-tae)
Puppy steps (@simp-4-jm)
Strip (@yoonia)
A special gift (@peachy213jiminie)
Lovesick (@jimlingss)
My forever: Park Jimin (@bts-trash-blog)
The only way (@ethertae)
Exposure (@dreamyjoons)
Kim Taehyung
Charade (@ughcore)
Wabi sabi (@flurrys-creativity)
Like real people do (@bangtanloverboys)
Lost in you (@jjkeverlast)
Spice (@aquagustd)
A little while (@noteguk)
Mine to claim (@jimilter)
Colors (@lovelytaes-blog)
Insomnia (@hobiwonder)
Sweeter than peaches (@jiminisnotavirgin)
Jeon Jungkook
Love is gone (@jeonbunnie)
2002 (@tattookoo) -> pt. 2 to 1999
Drown in your body (@sparklingchim)
Last christmas (@whatifyoulivelikethat)
Bleeding for you (@mixtapejimin)
I can handle it (@beautifulfuckup99)
Blackjack (@kpopfanfictrash)
Fifth wish (@jiminrings)
The spins (@here2bbtstrash)
From home (@gyukult)
The habits of a broken heart (@softykooky)
Not tired (@gggukniverse)
Cool with you (@kooktrash)
Late (@elitekook)
ストロベリー (?) (@euaphoric)
Tender (@liveyun)
A friends help (@armpirate)
Nevertheless (@nochukoo97)
Dress you up (@plvmkoo)
Soju (@plvmkoo)
Jealousy ink (@kooktrash)
Starry night (@kithtaehyung)
When she loved me (@jungkookstatts) [only fanfic that has made me cry, tread carefully)
He is love (@btsrunmylife)
Rattled (@gukslut)
Love alive (@jamaisjoons)
1999 (@tattookoo)
Home (@bonny-kookoo)
Tteokkboki (@taetaesbaebaepsae)
Cat got your tongue (@jessikahathaway)
The boxer's girlfriend (@i-am-baechu)
Honest fuckboy (@hobiwonder)
Perfect love (@i-am-baechu)
Soft (@hamsterclaw)
Brown-eyed baby (@jeonstudios)
Wrong time (@spideyjimin)
Cherry (@peachypinkygloss)
Off-league (@hansolmates)
For me (@personasintro)
OT7
Bon voyage: Into the sea (@yoongsisbae)
Thank you to all of the wonderful writers, ily <3
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