#i mean this in the nicest way possible and i hope that's coming across

[pikahlua]

hello! i read your meta about “control your heart” and it has some interesting elements but i think the notion that “izuku controlling his heart means suppressing emotions and is bad” is not something that many bkdk’s have the opinion of.

we understand that he has to be able to control his anger and that it’s as good thing; our beliefs of this “control your heart” plotline as it relates to katsuki is us wanting izuku to explicitly acknowledge that katsuki is a trigger and why that is for him - some deku introspection if you will. katsuki knows it, AFO knows it (so much so he told katsuki to his face about it), deku possibly knows it as well but it is not acknowledged by him both on his own or in a talk with katsuki. is it some unspoken accepted thing? would there be further discussions on katsuki specifically being a trigger that makes him lose all control? will they talk about that?

But Izuku does acknowledge it on his own.

Unless you mean you want him to specifically acknowledge that his being mad at Monoma for Katsuki's sake is what caused Black Whip to go berserk. It then sounds like the thing you're focusing on is that conversation after the Joint Training Arc in which people seem to assume Izuku is "lying" or withholding information, to which all I can say again is "I don't think they were even talking about that." I explained what I think they're talking about.

Now, I don't fault anybody if what they want is Izuku to talk about his feelings for Katsuki working as a trigger out loud, but I'll be honest--I think the time for that has long since passed. I can't imagine a way he could say this now that would sound natural or meaningful. It's as you say; he and everyone around him and the readers all KNOW this is the case. His actions proved it. Katsuki's treatment of Izuku's rage since then proves he understands to some degree too. TomurAFO himself knows this is the case and he even says so lol. It's very much in the Japanese style to let actions inform everyone's understanding such that no one needs to talk about it, such that talking about it would be seen as clunky and crass.

A lot of MHA characters and especially Izuku are meant to be read on their actions rather than waiting for their words. I've seen this desire for a verbal acknowledgement manifest in ways that seem like people just want to be told explicitly what's going on rather than being shown, like for instance some people think Izuku still hasn't acknowledged Katsuki's apology. Izuku answered it pretty loudly if you ask me, by letting his guard down and apologizing back and thinking from Katsuki's point of view and accepting Katsuki's help via allowing Katsuki to catch him. If he were to stop the story just to talk about this with Katsuki, it would probably end up sounding like exposition and not really take us anywhere other than to destroy the pacing of the story.

What I want is to encourage people to trust their interpretations of the characters' actions. Just because a character doesn't talk about something doesn't mean the thing didn't happen, that the character didn't feel important things we as readers were supposed to pick up on.

So yeah, sure, you can want that sort of verbal acknowledgement, but be careful about expecting it. You cannot deny there are plenty of people who do expect it.

[fieldsofwriting]

How do you think the bachelors (namely March and Ryis if you want specifics) would be on a first date and/or what is their ideal first date?

I only did March and Ryis for this, but if you guys want me to the others let me know!!

Ryis:

• This man tries to make the perfect first date.

• He goes so hard for it. Like pulls out all the stops, and probably gets super anxious if anything goes wrong.

• But I think his perfect first date is out by the old tree in the ruins and it’s a small picnic where the birds are singing and all he needs to focus on are you.

Ryis had made it perfect. Or at least attempted too. The red picnic blanket was laid out next to the tree-er stump- he used to love to sit under. Now he just needed you to run by. He’d left you a letter, so you should be here any second.

And here you were, walking up as you scanned the area for him. Standing quickly Ryis waves, “Hey! Over here!” He smiles, watching as you follow his voice. His heart fluttering as the smile spreads across your face.

“Hey!” You smile as you join his side. “I got your letter. What’s up?”

Ryis smiles, stepping aside to show off the picnic. “Join me for a bite?” He asks with a small smile. Watching as your eyes light up and nod quickly.

He leads you to the blanket, sitting down and pulling the basket closer. “I got sandwiches, fruits, juice and all sorts of things- I wasn’t exactly sure what you like but I tried to get-“ He stops speaking as you put your hand on his arm. Smiling as you say softly.

“Anything you brought is okay.” He stops speaking as he looks at your hand on his forearm. Looking up at you as his face grows warm.

“Right.” He nods with a smile. “Then let’s enjoy.”

March:

• I feel like the first date would be an after thought. Like you’ve been hanging out- borderline dating before he realizes he needs to take you on a date.

• Not that he wouldn’t have thought about it! He just- you know how he is. He has to be perfect. This has to be perfect.

• I feel like he doesn’t really care what kinda first date it is. But he wants to make it the best date you’ve ever been on. Because as long as he’s with you it’s perfect.

• Does he go cliche like dinner and a movie? Does he do something wild and fun? How does he make it perfect?

• I think he’d enjoy getting away from the Forge. That’s what he needs to do. He needs to get as far away from the forge as possible.

It’s perfect. At least, March thinks it is. After the two of you helped fix up town and got to go up on the summit? It seemed like a no brainer to do it. (Expect it take a lot of brains- he thought about this for weeks now.)

He had asked Orlic to send you up this way when you inevitably stopped by to try and talk to him. He’s prepped, flowers in hand. His nicest shirt on. His hair fixed and freshly dyed. It’s going to be perfect. It has to be. And then he sees you, your head poking up from just beyond the steps. “March?” You call.

“Over here!” He calls, his voice coming out a bit higher than usual. He clears his throat, trying to act normal. He watches as you make your way over, raising an eyebrow at everything.

“What’s all of this?” You ask looking around at March in his best duds. March shoves the flowers toward you, looking away with a blush.

“It’s a date.” He mumbles.

Blinking you look around at the lack of things to make a date other than the flowers. Not that you minded- it was just sweet for the thought. “Oh.” You smile looking at the flowers. “What are we gonna do?”

Fuck. March blinks. “…fuck.” He blushes even more as he hears you giggle. “S-stop laughing!”

You grab his hand, “C’mon. Let’s go to my house and watch a movie.”

March holds his ground. “No! I-I mean-“ He sighs heavily. “It’s gotta be perfect…”

Taking a step closer, you smile up at him. “It’s a perfect date if I’m with you.” March feels himself blush as he intertwines your fingers.

“Yeah…let’s go.” He smiles.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed!! I wanted to do a little more writing for it to help nail down the characters! And as always-

Requests are open!!

[sunraies]

rafe request — can you please write about reader getting into an accident after a fight with race and rafe getting worried but make it really really dramatic like car accident life threatening, i wanna cry and feel angst 🫢

I mean this in the nicest way possible. I hope this is angst enough to make you cry. If this doesn't work, watch Daisy Jones and The Six. That made me cry today or the Notebook. We all need a good cry sometimes x

You Can Go Your Own Way

Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader

Warnings- Angst. Car accident. Argument. mentions of a pregnancy scare. Talks about future. Hospital. Coma

As requested above.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

It wasn't even that big of an argument. At least wasn't meant to be until you told Rafe, you couldn't do it anymore.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He frowned, hurt flooding his eyes that you loved so much.

"I just. We keep going round in circles" You began gathering your things dotted around his room.

"Baby, stop" He tried to gently stop your hands before you moved away from him and continued "Baby, fucking stop!"

"Rafe, it just isn't going to work" You could feel the tears burning in your eyes as they threated to fall.

"It will! I promise" He tried to pull you closer but you resisted, knowing the minute you were in his arms, you would melt.

"Don't make promises you can't keep" You whispered before cutting off his reply "god, Rafe. I love you but we want different things. I'm off to college, and you'll be here, working for Ward."

"I never said I didn't want you to go," He frowned. "All I said was let's get married. "

You looked up to the ceiling before back down at him. "Because of a scare fucking pregnancy, Rafe" You pointed to the test thrown in his bathroom bin, only moments ago "God, your face when you were hoping it was positive. I can't do that. I don't want that. Not right now."

"I know, baby, I know." He ran a hand through his hair, "but I meant it, I would marry you. Not because of a baby but because I fucking love you"

You shook your head and swallowed "I don't want to be some tropy wife. I've seen how it broke my mother. She had so many dreams and I do too. You can't come with me and I can't stay here"

You had always wanted a life bigger than Outerbanks could give you. Collage in New York was that chance. Your heart was torn in two, all because you had fallen in love with Rafe Cameron.

"I love your dreams" Rafe looked like he could cry too. "I want you to live them, baby"

"I can't do that as a married collage student with my husband half way across the country. All I'm asking is that we wait. I can't give you the future you want right now"

"Why wait? It's just a ring. It shows that you are mine." He sighed before your eyes widened. It suddenly twigged, the other reason he had asked you.

"That's it! Fuck Rafe, do you really think that little of me? I'm not going to sleep around!"

"No. No. It's the guys I don't trust" He desperately tried to reach for you as you nodded and picked up the last of your things. "Baby, please"

"I'm not something you can fucking own, Rafe"

You had been together for two years and it was wonderful. Rafe was kind, caring, protective but the one thing that always caused a problem was when the protectiveness turned into possessiveness. A little you could handle, an arm around you at a party, a kiss on temple as you talked to another guy but the fighting, the anger at someone for even looking at you the wrong way, it was too much.

As you stammered your car door and locked it. Rafe ran out to you and hammered on the window. He called out to you, but you drove away, leaving him cursing barefoot in the driveway.

You weren't sure where to go. You couldn't go back home right a way. The moment your mother saw you crying, it would feel too real. Your best friend was most likely in The Cut, and again, if you fall into her arms, it would be too much to bare. You loved her brother so much, it hurt. So you drove into the night to clear your head.

It happened quickly. They say things can change in the blink of an eye. That life is made up of split seconds.

You had been adjusting the volume on the radio as 'Go Your Own Way' by Fleetwood Mac played. It seemed like the sky was crying with you as it began raining heavily.

Your phone lit up with a message distracting you.

Gorgeous 👑 - 'Call me or tell me when you are home safe...'

The rest of the message was cut off.

The name you had given him made you smile at the memory of him finding it. It was a few months into your relationship, even after the years together, you hadn't changed it.

----------------------------

"Why gorgeous? And a crown. " He frowned as he stared at your phone

"Because you're my gorgeous king." You kissed his cheek

"That's fucking cheesy as shit" He teased before you grabbed his phone

"Oh yeah, what's yours, then, huh?" You opened it, smiling at his lock screen of you before finding the contact and laughing "Baby with a red heart? And mine was cheesy"

"Shut up" He blushed before pining you down on the bed as you laughed.

----------------------------

When you glanced back up at the road, all you could do was gasp as yellow headlights blinded you. You tried to swerve but you just felt the car spin out of control on the wet road before the impact of metal hitting metal, the stretching, the boom of air bags, the smell of burnt rubber and the iron taste of blood.

Every nerve in your body screamed as your head felt heavy. Somehow, you ended upside down. You could hear a strangers voice, muffled like it was under water. A buzzing caught your attention as your phone lay broken on the road. Rafe’s face appearing on the screen, his gorgeous smile, broken and cracked as it showed he was calling. It was the last thing you saw before losing conciseness.

*-*-*-*

"Who the fuck are you?" Rafe asked as a male voice was on the other end of the phone.

"Calm down, son." The officer, on the other end, replied, "I'm officer Warron, now I need you to remain calm for moment."

Rafe dropped to the floor, holding his head as Officer Warron told him you had been involved in a road traffic accident and that you had been transferred to the General on the main land in crucial condition. They had contacted him as your mother had told them too, he needed to know. She couldn't bring herself to do it, and he was the last call on your broken phone.

He got to the hospital as quickly as he could, taking the Druthers as fast as it would possibly go. He almost forgot to pay the taxi before following the instructions your mother had messaged.

"Oh, Rafe!" Your tearful mother embraced him as he entered your room. He gently patted her back as he looked over to you.

You looked so broken and fragile in the bed, hooked up to a million machines. He just stared feeling completely numb.

"I know, it looks scary, but they said the surgeries went well. They put. They put her in an induced coma to, to help the healing." Your mother stumbled over her words. "She can hear you"

All Rafe could do was nod before your mother gave him a sad smile. "I'll give you two a moment," she moved to kiss your cheek before speaking to you. "I'm just going to update your dad, sweetie. Rafe's here. He's here."

They both could have sworn your heart beat raised a little at her words before she left.

Rafe stumbled into the seat next to your bed and shakily took your hand. "Shit, baby. I don't. I don't even know what to say, " He whispered. "I'm so sorry. Fuck..."

He suddenly broke down, his head on your arm as he sobbed. The only sounds filling the room were the beeping of your machines and his broken sniffles.

[lightsoutletsgo]

mimi congrats on 500, i’m so happy for you! 🤍🧸✨🫶🏼 i never send anything for these kinds of things but i need to do it now because i trust you 👀 so okay. . . can i request 2 ships please? and ofc i wouldn’t mind a little nsfw. i’m an aspiring actress, my favorite food is pasta and always will be. i’m a little introverted and shy but once i’m comfortable around people i’m able to get out of my bubble. i’m a perfectionist and don’t like not having control over my life. i have a hard time expressing my feelings :( and may come across as a cold person but i am extremely sentimental, i just wanna be held and loved. i like going out as much as i like staying in watching a movie or doing anything, really.

congrats again baby, love youuuu. <333

ahhh gwen! I'm so honoured that you trust me to write this request hehe I hope you enjoy it - this was literally so fun 🤭 happy reading! love mimi 🤍

MAX VERSTAPPEN ᝰ.ᐟ₊ ⊹ (everyone pretends to be shocked) - calls you schatje or lekker ding (when he's being silly) - loves loves LOVES feeling your hand in his!! it keeps him grounded - his love language is physical touch - he loves surprising you with flowers and buying you flowers. doesn't even need to be for anything, he just loves showing you how he feels through the language of flowers (omg fic idea?)

max relates hard to feeling like a perfectionist and while he also wants you to be the best version of yourself, he doesn't allow you to be hard on yourself. if he sees you getting too into your head, he's quick to hold your face and make you look at him. he'll remind you that he loves you and that he's proud of you. the way he looks at you makes you feel like you could make a million mistakes in the next few minutes and you'd still be okay - because you have him by your side. both you and max are often called the ice couple. no one means anything by it! they just think it's kind of funny how you're so short with others (especially if you're upset or stressed) but then you look at each other and it's like you do a 180. max won't ever admit this but it actually turns him into such a melt knowing that he's the only one who can turn you that mushy.

max loves taking you with him on race weekends and he will never not get butterflies seeing you there waiting for him in the garage with his name and number on your shirt, but nothing makes him get butterflies more than you sleepily curled up on his chest at home. he's a sucker for at-home dinner date nights and he loves cooking with you in the kitchen, it's fine if it gets super messed up because then he's telling you to get dressed and he's taking you out for dinner at one of the nicest restaurants in monaco where you know there's no way that he would have gotten in if he wasn't the max verstappen.

he loves that you have your dream of being an actress and he does as much as he can to support you in that, even if he's on the other side of the world. helping you look for workshops and audition opportunities, introducing you to your favourite actresses and inspirations when they're at the f1, helping you learn and run lines. you support him so much in his dream and career, showing up to as many of his races as possible that he can't wait for the day he gets to return the favour and stand on the red carpet as your trophy husband for the night! he's actually really excited by the thought!

max is absolutely addicted to the noises you make for him and only him as he loves to remind you. nothing satisfies him more than seeing your eyes roll back as he murmurs to you, his voice low, "who's making you this messy schat hmm?". he relishes in the way you squeeze around him when he's pushing in for the first time and you love the way he grips your hips as he does his best to control himself, the ache of his fingers digging into your hips a delicious reminder over the next few hours of just who you belong to. max is possessive, highly possessive. there is no way you're not leaving his bed, couch, apartment, car, driver's room, without him leaving a pretty mark in at least one or two places. he never does it where it can be captured by the cameras, instead choosing spots that only the two of you know about or spots that he can gently press when you're in public, the brief sting sending tingles down your spine.

"schatje?" max's voice prompts you to open your eyes from where you'd been dozing on the couch with the cats, "what do you want for dinner tonight?" you crane your neck to look at him as you gently scratch under sassy's chin, giggling at the way you feel her starting to purr against your tummy, "hmmm..." you look at him and bite your lip with a smile, max chuckles and nods, "pasta it is then!" you let out a cheer as max crosses the room and gently lifts your head to create a space to sit. as soon as he's sitting, he's placing your head back in his lap, one hand automatically soothing over your hair, his other hand snaking down to link his fingers with yours. you hum happily and he gazes down at you with so much love and adoration you swear you could cry. he leans down to press a soft kiss your forehead. you're not even aware of your eyes closing and drifting off to sleep but when you next open your eyes, you're cuddled into max, the cats nowhere to be found. it's dark outside and the lamp in the corner is switched on, casting a dim golden glow over the room. "how long was I out?" max stretches before pulling you closer to him, burying his nose into your neck and inhaling your cosy sleepy smell. "a couple of hours..." you sigh contentedly, hands sneaking under his hoodie to gently scratch at his lower back soothingly and he shudders next to you, "fuck... I missed you this weekend schatje." "I missed you to..." "I really don't wanna get up to make dinner," you giggle, "me either..." he sighs as if he's making a life altering decision, "then I guess we're just gonna have to order from your favourite italian restaurant." you give a little excited squeak as he rolls on top of you, softly grabbing one of your calves to wrap your leg around his waist, leaning down to press a kiss to your neck before he whispers in your ear, his voice gravelly, "think I could make you cum before dinner arrives?"

࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ

LANDO NORRIS ᝰ.ᐟ₊ ⊹ - calls you baby or sugar (when he's being annoying) - is addicted to your lips! like he loves kissing them but sometimes he gets so distracted just staring at you talk - his love language is acts of service - lando really isn't a good cook but he'll learn to make your favourite pasta dish just for you! lando is known for being that happy smiley, golden retriever around everyone whether he knows them or not. but you're not and he understands that! whenever you're in a new environment or meeting new people, he's gently linking his fingers with yours and squeezing once, twice, three times just to remind you that he's there if you need him. he'll happily stand slightly in front of you if it makes you feel better but as soon as you've warmed up and you're in your zone he's stepping back with a proud smile (and totally zoning out because your lips look so good when you smile and laugh)

lando is not a chef in any way, but he is determined to learn how to make your favourite dishes just because the way your eyes widen and you smile at him when he presents dinner to you is worth any amount of time or fails or tiny burns he gets in the process! he loves being able to surprise you after a long hard day or at any point! sure the presentation might be lacking and sometimes you have to add a little extra salt when he's not looking, but he does it with so much love and care. even taking the time to set the table up with a candle and some flowers. he'll pull your chair out for you to sit down and serves you as if you were dining at a michelin star restaurant (the only difference is that you pay him in kisses not cash!) he loves when you sit on stream with him and he loves watching you interact with the fans, asking them questions and passing on their questions to him. fans have made many compilation videos of the two of you and the titles and contents never fail to make you giggle watching them when lando's away and you miss him. "lando and his doberman gf" "golden retriver bf x black cat gf" "lando and his gf being the sun and moon for 10 minutes" lando loves how your lips look when they're smiling and laughing but he also loves how they look wrapped around his fingers as he slowly rolls his hips into you while you whine and moan underneath him. he loves the way they look around his cock and sometimes all you have to do is bite or lick your lips before he's clenching his jaw and closing his eyes, desperately trying to stop himself dragging you off to a quiet corner or his room - he usually fails! lando loves sloppy kisses while he fucks you nice and slow and deep, smirking into the kiss as you let out the most lewd whines and whimpers, drooling and cock drunk. he sometimes gets so turned on that he's begging you to sink to your knees under his desk. he's stopped a stream early before now, just because he couldn't wait any longer!

"hey sugar," you roll your eyes with a smile as lando slides onto the bed next to you, "come here often?" "you're ridiculous," you laugh and shove his arm. he wraps his arms around your waist and rolls onto his back, dragging you with him, "lando!" he cuddles into you, firmly tucking you into his side so you can't escape, "I was looking at an audition!" he sighs, "look later..." you wriggle slightly but he's unrelenting, "you're so needy!" you coo at him and you can practically feel his cheeks heat up, "yeah well... been missing you today..." he mumbles and one of your hands comes up to play with his curls absentmindedly, "ohhh yes please," you snort, "your fans are right, you're literally like a puppy..." he pulls away to look at you, "I'd be a good puppy for you," he says with a wink as you scoff and flick his forehead, "don't be such a whore, babe," "can't help it..." he shrugs, "just gotta look at your pretty lips," his face gets closer to yours and you can feel his breath on your lips, "just one look and I need to feel them."

he's murmuring against your lips at this point and your thighs squeeze together with no warning, he fucking giggles and presses a line of soft kisses along your jaw, teasing you. but you're not in the mood, "lando?" your voice is hushed as you look up at his pretty eyes, watching the way the lust and love he has for you swirl in them, "yes baby?" "kiss me." you don't need to ask him twice, he'll gladly kiss you anytime.

[muffinpink02]

Bronze Is Better Then Gold

part 2 here

Summary - Ona has transferred to a new police force, she meets her partner, Lucy Bronze. The girls hit it off right away, flirting at every chance they can get. But will Lucy’s past get in the way?

This is an AU story, but its got most of the girls from the lionesses featuring. People seem to like it so thought you guys might too.

Warnings - some suggestive scenes (lets keep it 18 and above) lots of angst, gun violence, smut to come in last chapter (chapter 4)

Ona shivered from the crisp cold morning air. It had just hit the start of October and the signs of autumn were already showing. Even after nearly five years of living in the UK the Spaniard still hadn’t got used to the cold English weather.

She drank the last sip of her coffee, taking in the grey building in front of her. Her new place of work.

She watched as a couple of uniformed police officers walked into the building, talking amongst themselves. She took in a deep breath, trying her best to shake off the first day nerves.

It was her first day at the new firm. She had been personally scouted from the Chief Constable to have a chat. When asked if she wanted to transfer it was an easy yes for Ona. The building was closer to home, it was a day shorter in the working week with Mondays off. And the Chief Constable was well known to be excellent at her job. Her team was one of the best in the city of London. She was definitely someone Ona wanted to be working under.

She dashed her empty coffee cup in a nearby bin and made her way to the buildings reception, where she was greeted by a very overly happy receptionist. Not something that she was used to back in her old firm or in London for that matter.

“Hello, how can I help you today?” The blonde smiled brightly up at Ona.

Ona cleared her throat. “Good morning, I’m Ona Battle, it’s my first day today, I was told to go to reception.”

“Ohh lovely! Welcome! I have all the bits you’ll need.”

Ona smiled at the bubbly blonde. She glanced at her name tag, Esme Morgan.

The blonde grabbed a folder that had lots of paper work inside, she handed it over to Ona.

“Right here’s all the bits you’ll need from me, I’ll take you over to Sarina, the ‘important’ part of the building. I’m Esme by the way. Follow me.”

The blonde was taller than Ona expected her to be, but that wasn’t hard in Ona’s experience, most people in the room were always taller than the Spaniard, unless they were under the age of ten.

“You’ve met Sarina right?” The blonde smiled.

Esme reminded Ona of an excited puppy in the nicest possible way, the girl was full of beans.

“Ahh yes, on video call. She’s really nice.”

“Oh yeah she is, she’s like a mum away from your own mum. Well that’s how I see her.”

Ona smiled, she liked this girl, she wasn’t like your usual Brit, she was genuinely cheery. Not fake cheery, but someone who actually seemed happy.

They walked down a long green corridor, Ona looked over at the pictures on the wall of police officers from across the years, even going back as far as the 18th century.

“We’ve heard such good things about you. I know Sarinas really happy that you joined us.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard good things about this branch. I could never have said no.”

Esme smiled, she had a happy bounce to her as she walked, her cheerful character was almost infectious.

“Ahh that’s great. I hope you like it here, we’ve got a lovely bunch on the team. Do you know who your partner is?”

“Ahh that’s good to hear. Erm I’m going to be working with Gold.”

“Gold? Who’s Gold? I didn’t know we had a gold.” Esme’s face scrunched in confusion.

Ona rattled her brain for the right translation, she was sure it was gold, or was it?

“Oh do you mean Bronze?”

Ona laughed, just slightly embarrassed of her mix up.

“Ahh yes, sorry I haven’t got my elements down.”

Esme smiled widely, Ona couldn’t help but smile back.

“Oh yeah, neither have I, don’t worry about it.” She laughed to herself, turning a corner with Ona following.

“Yeah Bronze is a lovely girl. She’s such a hard worker, one of the hardest workers on the team actually. You’re lucky to have her as your partner.”

Ona smiled, she already liked the sound of her new partner, but she had to try and forget ‘Gold’ and remember Bronze.

But little did Ona know that wouldn’t be hard.

They stopped outside a room with a plaque ingrained with ‘S Weigman’ on the door. Esme knocked a cheery tune.

In a heartbeat she heard a women’s voice coming from inside.

“Come in Esme.”

Esme opened the door motioning for Ona to enter.

“Right, here we are, this is where I leave you. Sarina will take it from here. Good luck today and if you need anything you know where to find me.”

“Thank you Esme, it was lovely to meet you.”

Esme nodded, a happy smile still sitting on her face.

“Oh by the way, Claudia called, she’s had to cancel the 10 o’clock meeting.”

Sarina nodded, smiling fondly at the blonde, it was as if she was looking at a young child.

“Thank you Esme, and thank you for bringing Ona.”

The bubbly blonde nodded and bounced off, waving at everyone she passed in the corridor. Ona couldn’t help but smile again at the brightness that Esme left on her mood.

“Ona! Please come in. It’s so good to finally meet you in person, I can’t tell you how happy I am that you’ve joined us. Come take a seat. Do you want a tea or coffee, a cold drink?”

Ona took a seat in front of Sarinas desk.

“Oh no, I’m okay, I just had a coffee. Thank you.”

Sarina nodded, smiling at the young girl in front of her.

“Okay, well firstly welcome. I know I’ve said it already but I’m so excited to have you on the team. Emma told me how much of a hard worker you are, you’ve accomplished so much at such a young age. It’s incredible. Emma did not let you go easy! But I’m glad you were happy to move to us.”

Ona smiled at her feet, feeling slightly shy at the compliments.

“Ahh thank you. It’s just part of the role, I really enjoy my job. And yes the move felt right, I had been there since I moved to London, so it was nice for a change. I’ve also heard a lot about you and your team. You’re well known how efficient your squad run.”

Sarina smiled and nodded, taking in the girl in front of her.

“So where are you from? That’s not a British accent I can hear.”

Ona laughed. “I’m from Spain, Catalonia. I’ve been in the UK nearly five years.”

“I see, so why police here and not Spain? What made you move here?”

Ona played with her fingers. “I was in the police force back in Spain, I joined when I was 18 but I wanted a change. I love my city but things didn’t work out how I wanted. I’ve always loved the UK and the people. There’s something special about it.”

Sarina nodded again, smiling warmly at the younger girl.

“I can understand, I’m originally from the Netherlands. I came here to study and never left. I then found my now husband and have lived here ever since.”

Ona nodded, smiling at the women. “The UK spoke to both of us.”

Sarina hummed in agreement. “It did indeed. Do you ever go back home much?”

Ona played with her fingers again, feeling a little uncomfortable. She kept her eyes casted down.

“Erm, not really. I went back once but that’s all.”

Sarina noticed the change in the younger women. She didn’t want to push so she changed the subject.

“Well, these next couple of days I just want you to get to know the team and the building and how we work here. I don’t want to throw you right in the deep end, even though I know you can handle it. I like my staff to feel comfortable first. Bronze and the team will be going on a raid next week. You’ll be joining them.”

Ona nodded. “Okay, that sounds good. I’m really looking forward to meeting everyone and getting stuck in.” She smiled at the older women.

“And I want you to know I am always here if you need to talk about anything, from work, to general life. We have our therapist on site that we ask you to at least see once every two weeks but you can go as much as you want.

Ona now understood what Esme meant about Sarina being a mother figure, she could sense a genuine care from the older women but also a firmness to her.

The Spaniard nodded and smiled. “Thank you.”

“Great, I’ll take you on a tour of the building and you can meet the team and meet your partner.”

Sarina showed Ona around the building, stopping off at certain floors that Ona would need in the future.

They then walked into the main office, where it looked like most of the staff worked. Ona suddenly felt a little nervous, she was fine with meeting new people, she was a social butterfly really, but it was always daunting meeting your new work colleagues.

“Nobbs, Stokes, come and meet Ona Battle, it’s her first day and I want you to make sure she settles in.”

Two short women smiled brightly at Ona, both walking towards her.

“Hello, I’m Jordan or Nobbs. It’s nice to meet you.” She reached her hand out to shake Ona’s.

“Hello Jordan, lovely to meet you.”

“I’m Demi or Stokes. Really happy to have you on the team.” The slightly taller woman also holding her hand out for Ona.

Ona smiled, shaking Demis hand.

“Hello Demi. Also lovely to meet you.”

“You’ll be working a lot with DC Nobbs and DC Stokes. They’re some of the best Detective Constables I’ve ever worked with.”

Serina patted Demi on the back. Looking at the girls like a proud mum.

“Yeah, yeah. You say that about everyone.” Demi rolled her eyes, joking with her superior.

“No? Do I? Oh just the good ones then.” Sarina winked at the Spaniard. Causing the group to laugh.

Ona once again could see the pride this woman had for her team, it was refreshing to see. It definitely wasn’t something she was used to in her old firm.

Demi then spoke. “We’ve heard only good things about you Ona.”

A slight tint of pink rushed to Ona’s cheeks.

“I’m scared I’ve got to live up to this reputation now.”

All four of the women laughed.

“Don’t worry. You have Bronze as a partner, she’ll make sure you live up to it.” A new voice entered the chat.

Ona turned around to face a women even taller then Esme. A cup of coffee in hand.

“Don’t try and scare her Scott.” Jordan scolded the older women.

The taller women laughed at her own joke. She stuck her hand out for Ona to take.

“I’m only joking. I’m Scott, it’s good to have you on the team.”

Ona noticed her thick Northern accent, she knew she’d have to listen extra hard when speaking with the tall woman.

“Thank you, it’s great to meet you.” Ona smiled.

“Ona, this is our SFC Jill Scott, one of the best I’ve ever worked with.”

“That’s true.” Jill took a sip of her coffee looking pleased with herself, while the other two girls rolled their eyes at the banter.

“Where is Bronze?” Sarina looked around the room.

“Gym.” In unison all three of the girls replied.

Ona quirked an eye brow at the response

“That girl! I told her to be here to meet Ona.”

“She probably wanted her muscles to look extra big to show off.” Jordan laughed.

“Yeah, like she needs them any bigger.” Jill took another sip of her coffee.

“Jealousy is a shit trait to have Scott.”

Another voice entered the conversation.

“Ahh Luce, you know I’m only joking. I am indeed just jealous.” Jill laughed.

Ona turned around wanting to give the new voice a face.

Wow.

Ona nearly forgot how to breathe, the woman standing in front of her was stunning. She took in the girl in front of her, she had almond shaped eyes, filled with a beautiful intense shade of green. Like Ona she had a face covered in freckles but a lot less dark and less condensed.

Her face was strong and soft at the same time, her jawline was perfectly defined, yet her other features were soft and feminine, she was gorgeous.

Her face was flushed, a thin layer of sweat glistening over her muscular arms and neck. Her dark hair was wet and scraped back, small curls escaping the messy bun, clearly wet from the gym that the girls had mentioned.

Ona was lost for words, the girl was beautiful.

“Ona this is CI Bronze, she’s going to be there for whatever you need, all of the girls will be, but Bronze is your go to girl.”

Lucy couldn’t hold back the smile that appeared on her face, Ona was breathtaking. It was her eyes that Lucy noticed first, she had wide, soft doe eyes, innocent looking eyes. A beautiful chocolate brown surrounded her iris, making her face warm and inviting.

Dark freckles covered her face, another feature Lucy couldn’t help but admire. Her skin was slightly tanned but not bronze, more of a milk colour. Lucy imagined that was because of the English weather.

It was when Ona smiled that Lucy felt her stomach flutter. She thought her face was beautiful and soft before, but her smile made her perfect. She noticed how chiseled her jawline was when she smiled, how perfectly it fit with her features. The girl was utterly beautiful.

Lucy held out her hand for Ona’s to shake.

Ona had to kick her brain into gear to move, she took Lucy’s hand, instantly loving how soft her skin was against hers.

“It’s great to have you on the team Ona, and like Sarina said, I’m here for whatever you need.”

“Thank you, I can’t wait to work with you.”

They held hands for a second longer than the usual handshake would normally last.

The interaction wasn’t missed by the other women, Jordan and Demi eyed up the the older brunette, smiling between each other as Lucy and Ona kept eye contact for a second too long.

“Okay, well. I’ll let Lucy take care of you from here, if you need anything let the girls know, or if you need anything from me you know where I am.”

The older lady smiled warmly at Ona, leaving her with her new co-workers.

“Let me show you your desk, it’s next to mine.”

“Great.” Ona followed.

Lucy walked towards a row of desks with computers and files of paper work neatly piled on each space. But there was one desk with only a computer that Ona assumed was hers.

“This is you. I apologise in advance my desk can get a little messy now and again.”

“Ahh that doesn’t bother me.” Ona couldn’t keep the smile off her face.

“I’ll try keep and keep it tidy though.”

“She won’t Ona, she’s lying.” Jordan poked her head over Lucy’s computer. Hers and Demis desk both opposite their own.

“Shut it Nobbs,”

Jordan smiled cheekily at the older brunette.

“Trust me Ona, give it a week.” Jordan smiled.

Ona laughed at the banter between the girls, she wondered if her and Lucy would ever get as close.

“Ignore her. I’m going to quickly head for the showers. I know you’ve got all that paper work to go through, so you can just chill here. Kitchen is just over there, help yourself to a drink. Once I’m back I’ll go through some bits with you.” Lucy smiled at the younger girl.

“Sure, sounds good. Enjoy your shower.” Ona had to stop herself from thinking too hard about Lucy in the shower. She looked around the room, noticing other people at their desks working, she was going to have to try and remember a lot of names today.

She started to read through her paper work, it was mostly rules and work conducts she had to read and agree to.

Eight pages in to her paper work she felt Lucy hover over her.

“God I hate all of this, it’s so boring, but I get it, it has to be done.” Lucy rolled her eyes.

Ona smiled, she agreed but she wasn’t going to make it obvious. “Ahh yeah, I know. Nearly done though.”

Lucy nodded. “Do you fancy a tea or coffee? I’m going to make one.”

“Coffee please.” - “Tea for me.” Jordan and Demi loudly put their order in.

Lucy rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t asking you!”

“Don’t be like that, you’re going anyways.” Demi shouted back.

“Fine. Ona?” Lucy started to get up.

“Erm, tea please? With two sugars please.” Ona smiled.

Lucy had to hold herself back from saying the ‘you’re sweet enough’ line.

“No problem.” Lucy made her way to the kitchen.

Ona smiled as she read on with her paper work.

Ona drank her tea that Lucy made, listening to the brunette talk about what investigations the team was working on.

“But don’t stress too much, I’ll have you sitting in the catch up on Friday, so you can get an idea. I’ll send over some bits so you can read them in your own time. I know the first day can be a lot.”

If Ona was honest she was more than grateful for the slow introduction to the work. She was finding it hard to concentrate with Lucy. She’d never been one for distractions with work, but she was having to listen extra carefully to Lucy, instead of watching her lips, wondering what they would feel like against her own.

Ona nodded. “Yeah that’s great. I’ll go over that tonight, thank you Lucy.”

“Great. It’s nearly lunch, Sarina has insisted we go for lunch together to get to know each other. Partners and all that. But don’t feel like you hav-.”

“Yes!” Ona internally winced at her own eagerness

Lucy chuckled.

“I mean yeah, that’s sounds great. It’s a good idea.”

“Cool, do you like pizza?”

“I love pizza.”

“Oi, don’t try and par us off, we was CC’d on that email too.” Jordan’s head pocked over the computer.

Lucy rolled her eyes once again at her friend.

——————-

The conversation between the girls came naturally, they spoke about why they got into the police force, and some of their hardest cases.

Ona explained that she fell in love with London, and how she always wanted to be a police officer when she was young. She kept some bits brief, not wanting to get into certain bits of her life.

She noticed those greens eyes watching her throughout the meal, every time she caught her, the older brunette would dart her eyes to something or someone else, but she was caught every time.

*********

By the end of the day Ona was tired, she’d already not slept great the night before down to nerves. She had met everyone else in the office after lunch, so by five she was yawning.

Lucy was on her computer sending Ona some notes to read.

“Right, don’t stress about reading this tonight. It’s been a long day.”

“But don’t be tired on Friday, we’re going to The Rose and Crown. And it’s the rules, you have to come.” Jill had come up behind Ona.

“Well it doesn’t sound like I have a choice, you can buy my first drink.” Ona smiled, getting used to the girls banter.

All the girls laughed, Jill put her hand on Ona shoulder giving her a squeeze.

“I like this one.”

Lucy was watching Ona, a bright smile on her face, Ona felt her heart beat just a little faster.

——————-

By day two Ona was obsessed with Lucy’s laugh, the girl had a serious nature to her, but once Ona made her laugh she couldn’t stop. She wanted to hear that beautiful sound whenever she could. It was a good thing Lucy actually seemed to find her funny. Ona felt a rush of excitement go through her, even at a glimpse of Lucy’s beautiful smile, the girl did have a beautiful smile.

By day three Lucy had to physically stop herself from staring at Ona. The younger girl would be doing the simplest of tasks and Lucy seemed to find it fascinating. She watched the Spaniard making them tea in the kitchen, talking and laughing with others in the office. Lucy maybe even getting a little jealous when someone made the shorter girl laugh hard.

Ona may have noticed the eyes on her and was loving every second of it. Making sure to laugh a little harder at something someone would say.

By day end of day there neither girl could keep the other out of their head. Lucy thought about Ona as she made dinner at home, wondering if Ona would like her cooking. Meanwhile Ona got comfy on her sofa to watch a film, wondering what it would be like to have Lucy cozied up next to her.

By Friday morning, Ona thought about Lucy as she ate her porridge, wondering what her morning routine looked like. As Lucy finished her workout in the gym she wondered if Ona was a morning person. She wondered what it would be like to wake up next to a groggy Ona. The thought made her body heat up.

———————

“We have eyes on Harvey Smith aka ‘Bugz’ and Frank Smith aka ‘Slims’. We know the brothers are highly dangerous to the public. We believe Slims is the brains behind most of the drug operations and Bugz is mostly muscles for Slims. On Wednesday at seven hundred hours, our teams will raid the location that we suspect they will be. We’ll have Scott and her team ready with arms. Carter will have the K9s unit, Bright and Greenwood will have their teams ready on site.”

Lucy looked over at her team.

“Any questions?”

Everyone shook their heads, and Ona wasn’t surprised. Lucy was clear with her instructions, she’d gone through many different stages of the plan. Ona understood why she was in this role.

“If you have any please come to me.”

Lucy looked her watch. “It’s 4.45 and Friday let’s call it a day.”

The room hummed in agreement, light chatter broke out as people started to leave the room.

Ona went to her desk to grab her bag and jacket, she felt a pair of hands on her shoulders.

“Ready for the pub?”

Lucy’s voice filtered into her ears, Ona nearly shivered at how close the brunette was.

“Sii. I’m ready.”

“Great. Nobbs, Stokes, Scott, let’s go.”

—————-

Most of the staff from the office were at the pub, clearly a favourite of theirs. They made their way upstairs to a booth next to a fire place, Ona instantly felt the warmth from the fire kissing her cheeks.

“Right, I’ll get first round who wants what?” Lucy stayed standing.

The girls gave in their orders. Before Ona could offer to help with the drinks and also just have an excuse to be with Lucy, Jill got in there first.

“Right come on then, I’ll help ya.”

At the bar Lucy gave in the orders. She knew Jill wanted to say something as the Geordie had never offered to help anyone with the drinks since working with her.

“Go on then, what do you have to say?” Lucy looked hard at the taller women.

Jill smiled smugly. “Nothing gets past you.”

Lucy hummed.

“Just noticed you’ve been a lot more chirpier around the office. A lot more happy. Started since our new Detective Inspector started.”

Lucy felt the knot in her stomach, was she that obvious? Did Ona notice? Who else noticed? Either way Lucy wasn’t going to fess up.

“You chat shit Scott.”

Jill laughed loudly.

“You know I don’t. Come on it’s okay, no harm in it. Just happy to see you happy to be honest. It’s been a while since I’ve seen that smile on your face.”

Lucy knew what Jill really meant when she said that. She could tell the older women said it with her own hint of sadness to her voice. If she was being honest, it was the first time this year she had felt a little happier. And it was all because of the short Spanish girl sitting upstairs.

“So Ona are you seeing anyone at the moment?” Jordan asked.

“No, I’m not seeing anyone. I’m a single, how do you say? Dingle?”

The girls laughed. “Pringle, a single Pringle.” Demi corrected.

Ona laughed. “Ahh that’s it. Single Pringle. What about you guys?”

“Demi here’s engaged, with a baby.” Jordan smiled.

“Ahh that’s lovely.” Ona smiled.

“And Jordan has a little thing going on with a blonde in the HR team.”

“Oi, shut up.” Jordan looked panicked.

“Oh come on Jordan, everyone knows. You guys really aren’t subtle.” Demi laughed at her friend.

“Who’s not subtle?” Lucy placed the tray full of drinks on the table, sceptically looking at her friends.

“Just Jordan and Leah.”

Lucy let out a breath she didn’t realise she was holding.

“Oh yeah, you guys aren’t subtle.”

“You can talk.” Jordan muttered.

Ona didn’t miss the daggers Lucy shot at Jordan.

The evening was full of laughter, Ona couldn’t help but feel a little sense of relief that these were her colleagues. They instantly made her feel like she was part of the team, it felt like she had been there longer than four days, it felt like she’d known these girls in another lifetime.

The pub bell rang.

“Last orders!” A bar girl shouted.

“One more for the road?” Lucy looked around the table.

“Not me, I’m at a coffee tour tomorrow.” Jill sipped on her pint.

“Yeah me too. I’m a plus one for a 2 year olds birthday party tomorrow.” Demi slumped in her seat.

“Yeah I’ve got to head off. I’m meeting a friend tomorrow.” Jordan cleared her throat.

“Yeah ‘friend’.” Demi laughed.

“I’ll stay for another.” Ona looked at Lucy.

Lucy had to hold back the excitement that bubbled up in her chest. Herself and Ona hadn’t really gotten any one on one time since the girl joined the team.

“Finally! Someone who isn’t a lightweight. Same again?” Lucy looked at Ona.

“It’s my turn. I’ll get this.” Ona shot up, going down to the bar before Lucy could argue.

Once the Spaniard was gone all three of the girls looked at Lucy, smirks on their faces.

“What?” Lucy looked at her friends.

“Oh come off it Luce, you like the girl.” Jordan nudged Lucy’s arm.

“What? No I don’t.” The brunette tried to defend herself.

She looked at Jill, hoping for some back up.

“I’m staying out of it. I’ve already said enough.“ She shook her head putting her coat on.

“Come on Bronzey. You can tell just by the way you look at her.” Demi laughed.

The smirk that creeped on her lips gave her feelings away.

“Is it that obvious?”

All three girls smiled happily at the brunette.

“Awww our girls got a crush.” Jordan grabbed the back of Lucy’s neck, making the girl duck her head.

“Get off.” She laughed.

“She’s single.” Demi quirked.

“Yeah but I don’t even know if she’s into girls.”

All three of the girls laughed hard then.

“Come on Luce, I thought you was a detective. The girl looks at you like you’re the best thing since sliced bread. I think this its a mutual feeling.” Jill lightly chuckled.

Lucy scoffed. “I doubt that.”

Before the girls could harass Lucy anymore Ona returned.

“Right I’m off. I hope you’ve enjoyed your first week Ona. The real work starts on Wednesday.” Jill winked.

“Sii, I’m looking forward to it. And thank you girls for making me feel so welcome. I appreciate it.” Ona smiled at the girls.

“It’s been a pleasure Ona.” Jordan smiled.

“Yeah, you fit in so well Ona, so glad we got you on our team.” Demi grabbed Ona’s shoulder.

“Look after her Bronze.” Jill pointed at the older brunette.

“Oh, she will.” Jordan winked at Lucy.

Ona didn’t miss the comment, or the way Lucy’s face went a shade of pink. Before Lucy could think of a come back the girls were gone.

Suddenly the room became quiet and the air between, Lucy and Ona felt thick. It was the first time Lucy had felt nervous, they had never been alone before, with no one sticking their nose into their conversations.

Ona was buzzing, don’t get her wrong, she loved getting to know her other colleges, loved being a part of the team but she had wanted some alone time with Lucy since she met her.

The fire made a loud cracking noise, the pub still had a few people nursing their drinks.

Lucy had forgotten all words, she hadn’t been able to think about nothing else since this girl came into her life only four days ago, and now her mind had gone blank.

After ten seconds of silence that actually felt like hours, finally Lucy’s brain woke up.

“So speaking about first weeks, how has yours been?”

Ona took a sip of her new drink, smiling.

“It’s been amazing. Everyone has been so friendly, so welcoming. It’s been great.”

Lucy nodded, smiling. She was happy to hear Ona was feeling welcome, she understood it was hard to start a new job anywhere.

“You especially have made me feel so welcome, I’m really happy that you’re my partner Lucy.”

Ona’s smile was shy, she looked at Lucy with those big beautiful brown eyes.

Lucy’s face had definitely changed in colour, she couldn’t hold back the dorky smile that plastered her face.

“I’m glad I have.”

Lucy smiled with her brilliant teeth.

“And yeah, you’re not too bad yourself. Definitely need to get you better at making tea, then you’ll be perfect.” She smiled cheekly at Ona.

Ona laughed hard. “Aye it’s not that bad!”

Lucy drank her drink, looking around making a point to not look at Ona.

“You’ll have to teach me.” Ona didn’t mean to sound sexy, but Lucy couldn’t help but think her voice got an octave lower.

Lucy pointed between herself and Ona. “If this is gong to work, then yeah, I’ll teach you.”

“Fine.” Ona smiled.

“Good.”

“Great.”

“Perfect.”

“No puedo esperar.” (I can’t wait)

Ona definitely lowered her voice that time. Lucy felt the heat rise up in her cheeks. Lucy laughed trying to gain her nerve back. She tried to change the subject before her face went any redder.

“Are you going back to Spain for Christmas?”

Ona’s smile dropped, she hadn’t told anyone the real reason for leaving Spain. It wasn’t because she was ashamed, it was just still a hard thing for her to digest. But if she could tell anyone Lucy would be the best person.

“No, I, ……. my parents don’t talk to me because I am gay.”

Lucy’s own smile dropped. She could see the sadness in Ona’s eyes, it broke her heart.

“Oh, Ona. I’m so sorry. When did they do that?”

“It happened when I was 19. They found out and kicked me out of my home. They blocked me and never spoke to me again. So I moved here. I wanted to move here at some point anyways, but it was sooner than I’d have liked.”

Lucy could feel her own tears well in her eyes.

“Have you spoken to them since?”

Ona looked down at her drink.

“After a year of living here I went back to Spain, to see if they would speak to me. But when I got to my home my mum closed the door on my face. I tried to reach out in many ways but they won’t talk to me.”

Lucy couldn’t believe how anyone could purposefully hurt the girl in front of her, let alone her own parents. It made her angry but Ona didn’t need that kind of response. She reached out her hand, gently grabbing Ona’s.

“I know we haven’t known each other that long but I am here if you ever wanna talk. Or if you ever just want an ear, I’m all yours.”

Ona smiled at Lucy, she heard everything she had said but mostly ‘I’m yours’ stood out most to her. “Thank you Lucy. I appreciate it.”

Lucy squeezed Ona’s hand, not ever wanting to let go, her hand felt so small and delicate in her own.

“Hi guys we’re closing up now.” The girl from behind the bar shouted loudly.

The last thing she wanted to do was leave Ona now. She wanted to do nothing else then scoop the girl up and hug her until she could smile again, even then Lucy wouldn’t want to let go.

“I guess we better leave.” Ona smiled sadly.

“You hungry?”

Ona nodded. “Starving.”

“Do you like chips?”

Ona nodded again, gaining back a smile.

“Right, come on then. I know the best place.”

——————-

“Okay don’t tell no one but I prefer curry sauce with my chips, and as a northerner that’s a bit of a crime. The northerners prefer gravy, I like both but the curry sauce just tastes so good.”

“I don’t think I’ve had it with chips before.”

“What? Okay, I’m about to blow your mind Battle.”

Ona laughed hard, she loved this excited version of Lucy, it probably was the fact that they were both tipsy and not in the office but it was nice to see the girl relaxed.

They left the chippy with their precious chips in hand.

“There’s a bench nearby if you want to eat there?”

“Yes, let’s do that. I want to give my full attention to your curry sauce.” Ona giggled.

“Thats what I like to hear. It’s just five minutes from here. It’s worth the walk.”

Ona followed Lucy down the coberrly streets of London. She watched as some business men stumbled into a black cab as they passed a posh looking restaurant.

They came to a busy road, with a few more pubs and bars lining the street. She felt Lucy link her arm into hers as she guided them easily through the crowds. Her heart skipped three beats from the simple gesture, just like it did in the pub when Lucy took her hand.

“Just down here.”

They got to a dark stair case leading down, Ona followed the older women, she would follow her anywhere at this point, no questions asked.

And as they got down the steps she saw why Lucy brought her here.

It was the perfect skylight of London. Ona had lived in London for nearly 5 years. She had seen the skylight in many different ways. Different times of the day, different seasons, different angles but this was the prettiest she’d ever seen it.

“Wow! It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah.” Lucy was looking at Ona. Agreeing with both views.

“I come here sometimes when I need to think. Or just needing some time alone. Come sit.”

They sat on the bench facing the Thames, the lights of London lighting up the sky.

“Right, get your chip and dip.”

Lucy held out the curry sauce.

Ona dipped a thick chip in the sauce, she already liked the smell of it, so she hoped she’d like it. And she did, she loved it.

“Oh wow, that’s so good.” She dipped another chip.

“Yes! I knew you’d like it. Get in.”

Lucy dipped her own chip then, a satisfactory smile on her face.

Ona watched the girl, smiling at her. There was something about Lucy, something that seemed like a comfort that she had known before, a comfort she hadn’t felt in years.

The girls spoke about random things, laughing at the one another as they ate their chips.

Once they had finished their food a comfortable silence settled between them.

Until Ona yawned.

“Yeah, it’s late. Where are you from here? We can maybe share an Uber” Lucy picked up her phone.

“I’m in Battersea.”

Lucy’s eyes brightened. “I’m in Wandsworth. Nearly neighbours.”

Ona loved the thought of them being so close. She couldn’t help but wonder if Lucy would ever meet up with her on a weekend.

Ona gave Lucy her address for the Uber.

“Cool, they’ll be here in two minutes.”

They walked to the pick up destination, both suddenly quiet. It felt like neither girl wanted the night to end.

The Uber picked them up, both girls jumping in the back. It was at least a 20 minute drive to get home, so Ona grabbed the aux cord.

She put on Rosalía - BESO. Lucy turned to her smiling. The older brunette began to sing perfect Spanish like it was nothing. Ona’s mouth fell open in complete surprise.

“What? You can speak Spanish?”

Lucy laughed at the girls shock. “Yeah a little bit.”

She didn’t know why but it turned Ona on to know Lucy could speak Spanish, not just Spanish but Catalonian, it was hot.

The girls sang mostly to Rosalia all the way. Lucy was first the be dropped off. She turned to Ona.

“Night Ona. I’ll see you Tuesday.”

“Lucy wait, I should have your number.”

“Oh yeah, you should. Pass it here.”

Ona handed her phone and Lucy put her number in it, she called her phone to save Ona’s.

“Text me when you’re in please.”

“I will.” Ona smiled at the older women.

Lucy slid out the car and walked towards her home. Ona and the Uber driver watched as she walked into her house.

As soon as Ona got in she texted Lucy to tell her she was home.

Ona - Hola! I’m home. I owe you for the ride x

Lucy replied instantly .

Lucy - don’t worry about it x

Lucy - actually you can pay me back by making better teas 🤔 x

Ona - Fine! I’ll do better! I’ll make your tea better then you do for yourself 💪 x

Lucy laughed to herself.

Lucy - hmmm bit confident, we’ll see x

Ona - got to be confident in yourself 💅🏼 thank you for a good night Lucy, I really enjoyed myself xx

Lucy - you’re right! And you’re welcome, I really enjoyed myself too. And always here if you need a chat xx

Ona - thank you Lucy ❤️ good night xx

Lucy - good night xx

[fortheloveofwonderland]

A War of the Heart - Chapter Three | Luke Alvez x Fem! Reader

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter Summary - Luke introduces Lisa to the team which sparks jealousy inside of you and leads you to make an incredibly stupid decision.

Category - heavy angst | smut | eventual happy ending

A/N - for the sake of this, Luke met Lisa a lot earlier than canon. Also I’m not gonna lie, I forgot about Walker until much later in the fic. He’s briefly mentioned in a later chapter.

Content Warnings - jealous reader, lying, swearing, drinking, arguing, some cheating (making out), getting caught, risqué photos, oral sex (m receiving).

WC - 4.1k

Chapter Three

Present - Quantico, Virginia

The weeks rolled on and you spent as little time with Luke as was humanly possible. With Hotch’s sudden departure into witness protection and Emily coming back to take on the role of Unit Chief, you had other things to occupy your mind thankfully, so your feelings for Luke went on the back burner. 

Until today. 

It started like any normal day as you strolled into the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee and found Spencer and Luke chatting away by the machine. Before they registered your presence you caught the back end of a conversation that would inevitably lead you to spiral.

“She’s great, man. I’m really happy.” Luke’s cheeks flushed as he averted his gaze into his coffee mug. 

“That’s really great. I can’t wait to meet her.” Spencer smiled at the newest member of the team. 

“Meet who?” You croaked out, your voice much less levelled than you’d hoped it would be. 

Both Spencer and Luke turned to face you, the older man looking incredibly sheepish but Spencer clearly didn’t notice. 

“Alvez was just telling me about his new girlfriend.” Spencer smiled at you, not detecting the tension in the room.

“I think it’s still too early to put labels on it.” Luke was quick to counter. 

“She sounds really great.” Spencer was not deterred. 

You scoffed, shaking your head at Luke. The next words out of your mouth came spilling forth before you had a chance to rein them in. 

“I can only imagine the calibre of women who would date Alvez.” You remarked snidely, moving past both of the men towards the coffee maker and ignoring the looks they both sent your way.

“Y/N, that was a little harsh.” Spencer lowered his voice as if Luke, who was standing a few feet from him, wouldn't hear. 

“It’s ok Reid, I know she doesn’t mean it.” Luke’s tone was teasing and you turned to see him smirking at you. 

His eyes told you what his words didn’t. Say one more word and I’ll tell Spencer everything. 

You grinded your teeth together furiously, staring right at him and wanting to hurl his scolding coffee right in his stupid, beautiful, smug face. 

“Hotch had clearly already mentally checked out when he hired you.” You spat, unable to hold back. In truth that was the nicest thing you could think to say. 

“Guys, stop this.” Spencer interjected, looking between the two of you like you were small children. “I thought you were friends?”

“Were being the operative word.” Luke replied, not taking his eyes off of you. “Excuse me, I have literally anywhere else to be.” 

With that he pushed past you and headed across the bullpen to his desk. You watched him go, rage bubbling in your gut. You went to follow him, forgetting all about your coffee, but Spencer stepped in your way. 

“You want to tell me what that was about?” He folded his arms across his chest and frowned at you. 

“He just…he grates on me.” You sighed. 

“You wouldn’t lie to me, would you Y/N? You and Luke were just friends, right?” He was profiling you even though he’d promised he never would. You could tell by the way he was watching you, looking out for any tiny tick that would give you away.

Luckily for you, you had an excellent poker face, one in which even Spencer wouldn’t be able to see through. 

“Of course we were just friends.” You spat. “You’d think I’d be so dumb as to what? Date Luke Alvez? Come on, Spence, don’t be ridiculous.” 

He continued scrutinising you for a few moments before he sighed and nodded his head. 

“I’m sorry.” He shrugged. “I didn’t mean to accuse you. I know you wouldn’t lie to me.” 

When he smiled and leant in and placed a soft kiss on your cheek, your heart ached in your chest. Spencer was such a good guy, the best guy really. He didn’t deserve any of this. 

Over his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around you, you noticed Luke staring right at you. Your heart plummeted to your stomach as you realised you were never going to love the man holding you. Not the way you still loved Luke fucking Alvez. 

***

Lisa Douglas was, by all accounts, a really nice woman. She was a physical therapist, she helped people for a living. She was charming and friendly and to top it off she was absolutely stunning too. She had the whole team eating out of the palm of her hand as she clung to Luke’s side, his strong arm protectively around her waist. Everyone loved her. Everyone, except for you. 

Admittedly she didn’t make it easy to hate her, but every time Luke touched her or sent a loving look her way, your blood boiled in your veins. He seemed genuinely happy and you hated yourself for being so angry at that fact. 

The whole team had gone out for drinks after wrapping your latest case and if you’d known she would be joining you wouldn’t have gone. This was quite honestly the last place in the entire world you wanted to be. 

Spencer was at your side, his own arm tucked around you, holding you close to him but you barely acknowledged his presence. You were too preoccupied analysing every look Luke gave Lisa, every small laugh, every tiny touch. As a result you’d consumed a little more wine tonight than you normally would have. Which was the only reason to explain why, when Luke excused himself to use the bathroom, you’d quickly done the same and followed him. 

Thankfully the men’s bathroom had been empty aside from him when you’d entered it, Luke’s back to the door as he used the urinal. You stood impatiently waiting for him to finish his business. You heard his zipper go and then he turned and his eyes met yours. 

“Uh…I’m pretty sure this is the men’s bathroom.” He frowned, heading to the sink and washing his hands. 

“Are you doing this on purpose?” You folded your arms over your chest. 

Luke flicked the excess water off his hands before wiping them down the front of his jeans and turning to look at you.

“Urinating? Washing my hands? Can you be more specific?” He knew exactly what you meant and you knew he did too. 

“You’re flaunting.” 

“I’m doing nothing of the sort.” He scoffed. 

“Oh of course not.” You rolled your eyes. “Is this your way of getting back at me because I’m dating Spencer?”

“Excuse me?” He shook his head. “Are we twelve?”

“I don’t know, you tell me.” You took a few steps closer to him. 

“You made your position on us very clear. I met a girl and I asked her out. If you’re allowed to be happy, why aren’t I?” 

It was a good question. A really good question. One you didn’t have an answer to other than the thought of Luke with another woman made you feel physically sick. But it was hypocritical, you were with Spencer, he was allowed to date whoever he wanted. But why did it hurt so fucking much. 

“You’re just trying to get a rise out of me.” You said instead. 

“Have you ever considered the possibility that not everything is about you?” It was Luke’s turn to take a few steps closer to you. 

“What’s the matter Alvez, you can dish it but not take it?” 

“I’m sorry?” He frowned at you. 

“I seem to remember you having a lot to say about my relationship with Spencer. But I don’t get a say on your so-called relationship?” 

“I’m not going to keep doing this with you, Y/N. You either want me or you don’t. You can’t have it both ways. You don’t get to be with Spencer and still have a hold on me.” He spat angrily, his jaw set harshly. 

“I never said I wanted you.” You shook your head, averting your gaze which made Luke laugh. 

“You didn’t need to.” He chuckled.

“I’m with Spencer.” You retorted.

“Still, you didn’t deny it.” He stepped even closer to you and you caught a whiff of his cologne. “Because you can’t, can you? Tell me you don't want me, Y/N. I dare you.” 

You forced yourself to meet his eyeline and the look in his eyes was challenging you. You swallowed a large lump in your throat, begging yourself to speak, to tell him you didn’t want him but you couldn’t. The words just wouldn’t come out. 

“I knew it.” Luke smirked, stepping closer yet again. “Y/N, if you want me, you know all you need to do is say the word and I’m yours. Just say the word.” 

“N-no.” You croaked, finally finding your voice. “I d-don’t want you.” 

“You don’t want me? But you also don’t want anyone else to have me?” 

“I didn’t say that.” You swallowed again thickly. “I just think you can do better.”

Luke chuckled darkly, coming yet even closer to you, leaning in to you and whispering in your ear.

“Be careful Y/L/N, your jealousy is showing.” 

You bit the inside of your cheek, desperate not to retaliate for fear of what you might say. Instead you shoved him backwards by his shoulders, and kept shoving him until he was up against the wall. 

His eyes were darker than you’d ever seen them as he stared at you, waiting on your next move. What happened next surprised you both, but you couldn’t stop yourself even if you tried. All of your pent up feelings spilled over all of a sudden and you pounced on him, crushing your lips against his as if it was your only lifeline. What was even more surprising was that Luke didn’t hesitate in kissing you back. 

His arms were quick to wrap around you, holding you in that firm way you remembered so well. He parted his lips, taking back the control and somewhat roughly edging his tongue in your mouth. He managed to spin you both around and tossed you against the wall without breaking the kiss, furiously grinding his hips against you. He was already hard, maybe he had been before you’d even kissed him. 

You wrapped your arms around his neck and let him grind you into the wall, giving yourself over to him completely the way you always did. His scratchy stubble felt so different from the thick beard he’d sported in Iraq but it still felt so good. His hands wandered from your waist, under your shirt and over the planes of your back. You moaned into his mouth at the sensation of him touching your bare skin after so many years. At the moment, your respective other half’s were the furthest thing from either of your minds. 

You would have let him take you right there and then, you had absolutely no doubt about that. You would have let him fuck you up against that filthy bathroom wall and probably not even felt bad about it. But you were pulled apart tragically too soon by the sound of someone clearing their throat. 

Luke leaped back from you, his eyes wide as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. You panted heavily as you stared at the figure in the doorway. 

David Rossi looked epitome of unamused, his expression something akin to a parent ready to scold his children. His eyes flicked between the two of you and your puffy swollen lips. Luke tried to hide the tenting in his jeans with his hands while you crossed your arms over your chest to conceal your painfully hard nipples. 

“Well,” Rossi huffed with a roll of his eyes. “I can’t say this is entirely unexpected.” 

Getting caught was not ideal, but you couldn’t help but be thankful it wasn’t by Spencer. When neither of you responded, he spoke again. 

“I know you probably think you’re really subtle, but may I remind you, we’re profilers. I am not the only one who had my suspicions about the two of you. Reid doesn’t deserve this. And that nice girl out there doesn’t either. So this is what’s going to happen,” he stepped closer to you both. “Either this is never going to happen again and I won’t tell anyone. Or, you do the decent thing and put Spencer and Lisa out of their misery. Capeesh?” 

You and Luke glanced at each other briefly before looking back at Rossi and nodding simultaneously. 

“Thank you, Rossi.” You replied sheepishly. 

“Yeah, thanks.” Luke agreed. 

“I’m not doing it for you.” He shook his head. “Now get the hell out of here so I can use the can.” 

The two of you scurried away like frightened children, not saying another word to each other. 

From across the bar, Spencer watched the two of you exit the men’s bathrooms together, his stomach coiling into knots. He knew you’d been lying to him. From the moment he’d seen you and Luke together he’d known you’d been more than friends. He wondered how many more times you would lie to him as you rejoined the group, sidling up to him and smelling suspiciously like Luke Alvez’s distinctive cologne. 

***

2010 - Diyala, Northeast Baghdad 

With only two weeks left until you were reassigned, you spent every free moment you could with Luke knowing it would soon be over. When you were together you didn’t talk about your leaving, it wouldn’t make it any easier anyway. You just simply relished every second you had left together. 

Tonight he’d been working late and by the time he made it back to his unit he was completely drained. He was ready to shower and collapse for the night, until he stepped into his housing unit. 

His jaw practically hit the floor when he switched on the light to find you kneeling on his bed. But it was what you were wearing that really got his blood pumping. 

“Fuck,” he quickly closed the door, glancing over at the burlap divider. 

“Martinez is out on mission. Won’t be back for a few days.” You smirked at him, curling a finger to beckon him closer. 

“After the day I’ve had, this is the best welcome I could have asked for.” His eyes raked up and down your body taking in every inch of you. 

You were wearing one of his army jackets, his last name stitched over the chest. You wore it undone and the sliver of skin on display told him it was the only thing you were wearing. 

“I wanted to be naked but it’s so damn cold in here.” 

“Somehow this is better than you being naked.” He took off his own jacket, dropping it on the floor and grabbing something off of his desk. 

He pointed it at you and you were quick to wrap the jacket tightly around your body. 

“No way.” You laughed, shaking your head as you looked down the lens of the Polaroid camera. 

“Please?” He whined a little. “For when you leave me.” 

You pulled a face, a little sad he would use that against you, but you could never deny Luke anything. Reluctantly you parted the sides of the jacket a little, enough to show off a little cleavage and stomach but you weren’t giving him the full show. 

It seemed to be enough for Luke as he hissed and poised the camera. You pouted at him, smiling at the camera with your eyes. Seconds later you were blinded by the flash and heard the whir of the camera spitting out the film. 

Luke gave the Polaroid a little shake before tucking it between the pages of a book to develop. He deposited the camera back on the desk before walking over to the bed. 

You knelt up on the mattress and Luke grabbed the lapels of the jacket to pull you close, he kissed you fiercely, still standing next to the cot.

“You have no idea how fucking perfect you look like this.” He spoke into your lips. “I’m going to cherish that photograph forever.”

“By cherish you mean jerk off over, I assume?” You teased him and he retaliated by biting your bottom lip.

“Obviously.” He laughed, hands working their way into your hair. 

Your own hands wandered, down his back and over his ass before circling his waist and stopping on the button of his pants. He deepened the kiss as you popped the button, wriggling the fabric of his pants and underwear over his hips just enough to free his already hard cock. 

You tore your lips away from his and he straightened himself up, now at his full height you were in the perfect position. You pulled him closer by his hips and placed kisses along his pelvic bone. One of his hands found purchase on the back of your head, gripping your hair and guiding you lower. 

You glanced up at him through your lashes as you let your mouth fall open and you started to take his length in your mouth. Luke moaned deeply, a sound that rumbled through his whole body and he thrust the rest of the way into your waiting mouth. 

As usual, Luke set the pace, using his hold on your hair to move you back and forth on him. You enjoyed when he took control, simply letting him use your mouth for his own pleasure. You hands groped at his ass while he fucked your mouth, pulling your hair at the roots as he did so. 

You only had a finite amount of time left together and you were going to make every second count. 

***

Present - Washington, DC

“You wanna come in?” You asked Spencer as you unlocked your apartment door later that night. 

Spencer had been oddly quiet on the taxi ride from the bar to here and had barely made eye contact with you. 

“Not tonight.” He shook his head, gnawing on his bottom lip. “I just wanted to see you home safely.” 

“Oh, ok.” You nodded stiffly. It wasn’t like Spencer to pass up spending time with you. 

“I want to ask you something and I need this to be the last time I have to ask you.” He scuffed the toe of his converse on the floor awkwardly. 

You held your breath, you had a pretty good idea of what he was going to say. 

“Ok.” You pushed your back up against the door, only half wishing you could disappear through it. 

“Were you and Luke ever involved? Romantically.”

You swallowed thickly. You knew you owed him the truth, it was the least you could do. Looking into his downtrodden eyes you wanted nothing more than to be honest with him. But he wouldn’t understand. He’d freak out and get jealous and you were sure it was better for him not to know. In your own way, you were trying to protect him. 

“No.” You were getting so good at lying about it you almost believed it yourself. 

“You see the thing is,” Spencer’s eyebrows knitted together and he took a half step away from you. “I don’t believe you. I want to. You have no idea how much I want to. But I’ve seen the way you are around each other and I think there’s more to the story than you just being friends. Maybe I’m being paranoid, but I don’t think I am.” 

“Spence, please? Just come inside?” 

“No.” He shook his head. “No, I need some time to think.” 

You watched him walk backwards towards the stairs. You knew you could get him to stay if you wanted to, but you didn’t want to force him to be here. You stayed silent and watched him go until he reached the top of the stairs and he turned away from you finally so he could descend them. 

He hoped he was wrong. But he suspected he wasn’t. And if you’d lied to him, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to forgive you for that. 

***

“You were awfully quiet tonight.” Lisa spoke from where she sat on the edge of his bed as he exited the bathroom after his shower. 

His towel was slung low around his waist as little beads of water rolled over his skin. He wasn’t sure why he’d asked her back to his place tonight when he really wanted to be alone. Roxy was curled up at the foot of the bed and all he wanted was to curl up with her and maybe sob against her soft fur. 

“Yeah sorry, I’ve got a lot on my mind.” He croaked. 

“Is it anything to do with this?” Lisa held up a small thin item she’d been toying with in her hand and Luke immediately knew what it was. “I wasn’t snooping, I was looking for a phone charger.” 

Luke sighed heavily, running his fingers through his wet hair. He padded over to the bed and sat down next to her, taking the Polaroid photograph from her hand. 

“I mean I can tell it’s an old photo but I’m pretty certain that’s Y/N.” 

“Yeah.” Luke nodded, staring down at the Polaroid, instantly being transported back into that moment. 

That picture had been Luke’s solace on many lonely nights after you’d gone to Afghanistan. That photo and his hand were all he had left. It had been a really long time since he’d looked at it but he kept it nearby just in case. 

You looked so goddamn beautiful in that photo, in nothing but his army jacket and the smirk on your lips. He couldn’t look at it without imagining the way you’d sucked him off right after he’d taken it, and the way he’d fucked you after. 

“You didn’t tell me you dated.” Lisa didn’t sound annoyed, frustrated sure, but not angry. 

Luke looked away from the image and turned it upside down before placing it on the bed. 

“She didn’t want Spencer to know about our history so I kept quiet. I guess I thought it was best for you not to know either although I don’t really know why.” His voice was distant, lost in another time. 

“Well, you can tell me now.” 

Luke nodded, knowing he wouldn’t get away with not being honest with her. He closed his eyes and ran his hands over his face. 

“We met in Iraq thirteen years ago. I was older, technically her boss. She was a ray of fucking sunshine in the middle of a war zone. It was supposed to just be physical but I uh…I fell in love with her.” He felt the tears pricking the backs of his eyes. “I wanted to marry her. And then she was reassigned and I never saw her again. No, that’s not true, I saw her one more time, eight years ago at the funeral of a soldier we worked alongside in Iraq. But I didn’t see her again after that until I joined the BAU.” 

He finally looked back at Lisa and she could see the unshed tears obscuring his vision. She reached out and cupped his cheek. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I just…I don’t know. I just didn’t. And I’m sorry.” 

“I understand.” Lisa nodded sadly. “But I have to ask; do you still have feelings for her?”

Luke swallowed thickly, one single tear rolling from his eye. 

“Yes.” He admitted. “She was my first love, Lisa, you have to understand. I thought I was gonna spend the rest of my life with her. Seeing her again has been hard, complicated. I can’t lie and tell you there aren’t some unresolved feelings there. But it doesn’t mean I don’t also have feelings for you. You’re the one I want to be with, ok?” 

“Do you want to be with me because you have feelings for me, or because she doesn’t want you?” She let her hand fall from Luke’s face. 

“I want to be with you because you’re amazing and beautiful and incredible. I would want to be with you regardless if she wanted me or not.” Ok, so maybe that wasn’t strictly true, Luke wasn’t entirely sure. 

Admittedly after you’d kissed him tonight, if you’d told him you wanted to be with him he probably would have marched out of that bathroom and ended things with Lisa on the spot. But you didn’t want him, so what was the point in telling Lisa that? 

“Ok,” she nodded, forcing a smile. 

“Ok?” 

She cupped his face again, leaning in close and placing a chaste kiss to his lips. 

“We all have a past. It’s not like I’ve never dated anyone before you.” She laughed a little. “Granted I don’t work with any of my exes but, I get it. And I’m not stupid enough to let an amazing man like you go over something so petty.” 

Luke rolled his lip between his teeth, nodding at her words. She kissed him again softly, pulling him back to the mattress. 

Taglist

@carolinesbookworld @wooya1224 @littlebeanwrites @randomrambling

[sleepis4theweak]

Hi Mama,

I just want to let you know how much I love you and how much you mean to me. You make every day better. Everything seems to be brighter since I met you. You love and kindness for everything and everyone and flooded into me, making me feel better about the world. You make me happy to wake up!

Every time you most and I get to see your WONDERFUL art, I actually smile, I feel happy. Actually happy. You have inspired me in every way possible, from your art, your kindness, your love. You make me happy to be alive cause I get to be alive in a world with you.

They way you help everyone makes me want to help more, seeing you be the nicest person I know. Being able to say "I love you" and get an "I love you too" back and feeling like you mean it makes me feel more loved than I've ever felt.

I've never felt this loved in my life, I've never cried of joy like this before. I haven't been this happy in over 7 years... It is crazy to think how my life was before I knew you.

I want you to feel the most amount of love you ever felt, I want to give you the most happiness I can. You deserve the world! I thought I could never be this grateful for a human to exist, yet here you are. Shining your love and warmth, warmer than the sun could.

I love you, Mama. So much more than you could imagine. 🧡🧡🧡

(also yes I did cry writing this, but it was happy tears 🥲)

Mike,

First of all- WHY WOULD YOU KILL ME LIKE THIS AHHH <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Second of all, I want YOU to know how much I love you and how much you mean to me. I adore you to bits. You are so incredibly talented, and amazing, and brilliant and so so so wonderful. I'm so so so happy you are in this world, and that I was able to meet you. You make ME happy to wake up.

I am so absurdly lucky that I was able to meet you. That I have been able to share space with you and talk with you. I can't even put into words how happy it has made me.

I hope you know that I mean it. I truly, honestly mean it. I LOVE YOU!

You deserve the world as well, you deserve happiness and love and joy and I am so insanely glad I was able to give you even a sliver of that. You deserve so much.

I'm sorry I'm not good with words, but I hope you know that I love you, more than YOU could ever imagine. I hope that comes across <3 <3 <3

I love you so so much.

[novorehere]

I’m not in the vore community (is that an accurate thing to call it?!) so I hope you don’t mind receiving this from a total rando lmao. But I randomly came across your Stardew headcanons post thanks to a specific-but-unrelated search, and I just wanted to say it was SO cute 🥺 At first I was just curious but by the end I was like “mhm mhm yep you’re so correct” and smiling over how sweet it was. You totally don’t have to answer this ask, I just thought it would be rude not to share my thanks for your lovely writing! And for helping me appreciate the appeal a little more :) Light and love

This ask is from JANUARY and I’m so sorry I’m just getting around to answering it now (Side note- happy 1.6 day! Hopefully it comes out on switch soon, I’m dying to play it.)

Anyway, this ask might be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me on this blog 😭 To have someone who’s not into vore appreciate and enjoy my writing anyway is the highest honor I can possibly think of. I’m smiling so much right now, you don’t even know.

The fact that tumblr’s search function makes it so that people can stumble upon my writing despite it not being in the tags is a little embarrassing, but I’m so pleased that you liked it! I like to treat it as more of a silly AU where I can play around with the characters and think about how they would react in a weird, yet oddly charming situation :)

The “vore community” online isn’t really a single community, since there are so many different preferences ranging from sexual to platonic, and violent to harmless. On tumblr, there are dedicated “fandoms” for both non-sexual vore and G/t (Content featuring giant characters and tiny characters, both from fandoms and people’s OCs.)

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve always had an interest in media where people shrink down or interact with people way bigger than them. Same thing with characters being eaten/going inside the body. I’ve always had a fascination with the human body, how it works, and what it might look like inside. And little did I know, there were many people like me online who shared the exact same experiences and interests! And I think that’s really cool :)

Anyway, I’m glad I could make your first experience stumbling across this stuff be less than traumatic xD Your kind words seriously mean a lot, and I’m glad you could enjoy my writing even if the subject matter was a little on the weird side. I hope you’ve been having a good 2024, and enjoy the new update!

[slasher-male-wife]

Request for Lester sinclair

I had this idea of Lester waking up to go to his daily rounds of picking up roadkill, but the reader is practically clinging onto him, so he ends up just taking them with him!! Imagine laying across the passenger seat of Lester’s truck with your head on his lap, while he smiles and tells you stories while picking up his roadkill lol

No pressure I love your writing <333

Ok I love this idea and it honestly reminds me of this other one shot I read awhile ago, I'll link it if I can find it but this seems like a really cute idea. I haven't written much for Lester lately so I'm happy to do this for you.

Why not join me?

Warnings: Mentions of road kill but that's about it

It's six in the morning when Lester's alarm first goes off. He's quick to shut it off and try to sit up when he feels the weight of you clinging onto his arm. He smiles to himself as he tries to pull you off but you just grip on tighter. He shakes his head a little and lays back down, still trying to get you to let go. He sees you open your eyes slightly and smile at him. Knowing that you're awake now he doesn't feel as bad trying to talk to you. 

"Honey I've gotta get up now. I've got a lot of work to do." He says gently as he tries to pull off your arms but to no avail. 

"Just a few more minutes ok? The sun isn't even fully up yet." You reply. He laughs a little to himself. He knows how Bo gets about him not getting work done. He loves his brother but he really is a hardass sometimes.

"Well I know that but it's better to get started earlier ok? Now you've got to let go of my arm sweetpea," You shake your head and hold on tighter if that's even possible. He sighs and smiles to himself, "How about you come along with me today. I don't mind ya joining me." You think about it for a few seconds before letting go of his arm and rubbing your eyes. 

"I can do that." You smile and Lester smiles back. 

"Be ready to go in 20 minutes alright?" You nod and he gets out of bed. Lester gets ready and when he passes by his room again he sees you getting dressed too. Walking to the kitchen he makes a quick breakfast and pours himself some coffee. You soon join him. Eating quickly then making your way out to the truck. You get inside while Lester gets a few things ready. When he gets in the truck he can see you falling back asleep. He smiles to himself as he starts up the car and gets to driving. A few minutes into the car ride you lay down with the back of your head on his lap. You look up at him and he looks down at you for a moment with a smile. Although when he looks back up at the road he’s still smiling. 

“If you wanted to sleep some more, you could have just stayed at home honey. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here, you know.” You yawn and nod, closing your eyes. 

“I know that. But I wanted to be with you today.” 

“I don’t know why someone as nice as you wants to spend their day around roadkill,” He moves a hand down and strokes your hair, “Or other people if we pick anyone up today for that matter.” You know what Lester means by that. When you two pick up people they’re never usually the nicest to you. 

“Well then let’s just hope we don’t pick up anyone this morning. I don’t get why you have to get up so early anyway. If Bo wants the roads to be clean so badly he should pick up the road kill himself.” Lester chuckles to himself and puts his hand back on the steering wheel. 

“It’s better to catch the animals earlier before the sun bakes them up and makes them smell like hell. It’s also important to catch as many people as we can. You know how Bo is about getting things done.” 

“Well I think he just needs to calm the fuck down every once and awhile. He doesn’t have to work every single day.” You two break out into a small, quiet laughter. 

“Bo is Bo and he’s not going to change anytime soon. It’s better to just try and get along with him anyway. I do owe him a lot. So doing this is the least that I could do.” You nod and open your eyes again. 

“I love you Lester.” He looks back down at you. 

“I love you too Y/n.” 

[nothingtoseeherebyeexx]

hi, i was just wondering if you could please put your story under a cut when posting it? don't get me wrong, i'm really enjoying reading it, but it'd be better if it was under a cut so people don't have to scroll past it every time they come across it

i really mean this in the nicest way possible, sorry if this seems rude. hope you have a lovely day :)

i deadass don’t know how to do it. it bothers me, too, and i thought ppl saw it differently on screen?? i’ll try to do something abt it, if someone knows how pls tell me!

thank you for telling tho i had no clue you didn’t see a cut somewhere

[karume-selfshipper]

Tides That Bind: Boiling Point

Juicy juicy angst and feels. Link starting the Sage Awakening in TotK, plenty under the cut.

This visit would not be very pleasant. All the clues as Link trudged his way back to such a familiar place had been quite the eye opening experience. He could only hope that Sidon and Selatoh were holding up… and that Selatoh hadn't bitten Yona yet.

At the very least he would be delivering good news, mostly. Hopefully he wasn't too late for that. Running, almost sprinting into the Domain as he glanced around for any sign of Selatoh. Thankfully she was standing right there next to the twin statues of their previous accomplishments with no sign of Yona… yet.

As Link neared the center of the courtyard, Yona walked out as if she was about to confront Selatoh. It was a little tense since Link just barely managed to speak up first.

“Link, what have you managed to find?” 

Selatoh blatantly ignored the other woman, attempting to cut her out of the conversation as much as possible. Not that it was very effective as Yona forced herself into the conversation as best she could. 

“Uh, I think I should tell Sidon as well. Is he still up at Mipha’s Court?” Link pointed slowly over his shoulder, “If… if you don’t mind Lady Yona, I think it would be best for Selatoh and I to take one path alone. There’s something I need to discuss with her in private.”

“Oh, of course Sir Link.” Yona eased her stance as best she could, “I shall meet you at Mipha’s Court then.”

It did not take long for Selatoh to start ranting as soon as she and Link were outside the Domain. Leaving the Hylian Knight to feel more of a therapist than a warrior.

“-and with Sidon purifying the water supply, she acts like its MY fault he’s working so hard!” Selatoh waved her arms, “If I could take over the job I would! I’ve been trying but Sidon is just better at water magic than I am!”

“Has she even asked Sidon how he feels about the situation?”

“As far as I’m aware, no. She only ever does things to get into Sidon’s good books. She didn’t start in the infirmary until Sidon asked her.” Selatoh growled, “Father asked before he left, I asked when Sidon took up the water purification, but no. Yona just haaad to wait for Sidon to ask her directly.”

The way Selatoh’s jaw snapped as she huffed was very telling. Knowing her, Link was certain her asking was almost overly sweet as a form of compensation for her otherwise sour attitude. Though it probably didn’t come off as the nicest way to ask, despite Selatoh’s best efforts while under so much stress. It was a wonder there were spears left in the Domain, let alone Yona not being covered in vicious bite marks…

“And even now she only thinks to do things to make Sidon happy as if she can win his favor.”

“You mean like my Zora Armor?” Lin smirked a little.

Snorting a little to hide the slight blush at being called out, Selatoh seemed to calm down only because they were getting close to Mipha’s Court. But it was very obvious to Link that she was almost at her breaking point.

Turning the corner, Link was a little shocked to see that Yona wasn’t there just yet. He was certain that she would have taken the shorter route. Though there was the possibility that he and Selatoh had simply moved faster somehow; given how Selatoh had been speed marching the whole way to Mipha’s Court.

“Oh, Sidon!” Link’s head swiveled to Yona as she climbed up from the nearest waterfall, “Please, we need a moment to talk to you!”

Selatoh’s lips tightened in a slight frown, not slowing her approach to her brother. Trotting almost double time, Link attempted to keep pace; anything to keep Selatoh from snapping.

“Lady Yona! Selatoh!” Sidon looked across the open space to both, “You two should be back at the Domain! I can handle things here!”

“I’m certain you can, my dear Sidon.” Yona cut Selatoh off, “But there is something troubling you, it is quite obvious.”

“I assure you Lady Yona, I am fine.” Sidon turned back to his purifying, “I have duties to attend to.”

“Why must you act like her?” Yona stomped her foot, splashing water everywhere as she gestured to Selatoh, “Are you truly so wrapped up in the past that you cannot even see how poor your choices are?”

The silence was palpable with tension as time seemingly slowed to a crawl.

“WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW ABOUT ANY OF IT!?” Selatoh roared, “You’ve only just arrived in our Domain. Where were you when our sister took up arms against the Calamity?”

Sidon swiveled instantly, an arm thrust out between Yona and Selatoh preemptively as a protective measure. Despite Selatoh staying as still as she could as she yelled.

“Where were you when our FATHER went missing? What were you doing?” Selatoh swung an arm, only just skimming the top of Link’s hair, “How can you stand there and claim to care when you haven’t even asked for the full story? How could you POSSIBLY KNOW WHAT EITHER OF US ARE GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW!!”

Turning on her heel, knowing how her little tantrum must’ve looked to the other Zora present; Selatoh grit her teeth, smudging tears away roughly. 

“How da-”

“She does have a point Lady Yona.” Siodn’s voice was dangerously low for a brief moment before he softened, “Please, don’t press the matter. Both Selatoh and I were absolutely gutted when Mipha met her fate 100 years ago.”

Watching Sidon almost follow Selatoh, “We were hardly old enough to understand what was really going on. And now history seems to be repeating itself in a far more disastrous way. Please Lady Yona, try to understand that my actions, while they do mirror my sister’s… both of them now that I think of it, are mine. I made my decisions.”

“Sidon, you shouldn’t-”

“I will do what I can to save my Domain.” Sidon turned, the harsh look across his face matching Selatoh to a T, “Though I do realize I should step back slightly to ease your and Selatoh’s minds, I also stand by my actions thus far. I cannot stand back and allow Father or Selatoh take my place, to allow their attempts to fix things to be in vain.”

Rubbing her arm guiltily, Yona looked just past Sidon to where Selatoh stood. Only to see the other red shark readying her spear, a massive glob raining from the sky. Whatever was going within the Domain, it had come right to their front door.

[sirowsky-stories]

The Flowers Always Know

Chapter 7 - Perfectly Awkward Things

Description: Seeking out Marcus for answers turned out to be fruitful in more ways than one.

**Beware! Author chooses NOT to display warnings on the individual chapters of this story. Read at your own risk!**

Rating: Mature 18+ONLY Word Count: 3884 (1831 words added) Masterlist (this story)

   “My mother did what?” Marcus exclaimed in shock after you knocked on his office door and asked if he had a minute to talk, before telling him about the events of the morning.

   He’d looked so happy to see you, which had made it very difficult to remember why you’d come to visit him at all.

   “Yep. Suddenly I see why you felt the need to protect me from her. I still haven’t decided if I like her or not.”

   “I should think the answer would be ‘absolutely not’, after waking up to that,” he said, shaking his head in disbelief. “But I guess now we know what she was up to yesterday.”

   “Oh, don’t get me wrong, I was fuming,” you recalled with emphasis. “I just can’t help but admire her sass.    I could’ve done without the weird questions, though. I mean, unless you’re a florist or trying to impress someone, a deep-dive into the history of their favourite flower isn’t exactly the most enticing subject.”

   But hearing that made Marcus look extremely nervous, suddenly.

   “She asked you what flowers you like?” he wondered, and he sounded as though this one topic could somehow ruin his life, which of course only made you that much more confused.

   “Yeah, do you know what that’s about?” you asked, subconsciously leaning forwards in the sofa as your curiosity peaked.

   He was sitting across from you, in an identical sofa on the other side of a coffee table, and he’d been leaning forwards the whole time you’d been there.    But he now fell back against the backrest, as if needing to be as far from you as possible.

   “Uh, it’s something she does sometimes. She loves flowers, always has. She’s got the nicest garden you’ve ever seen, and she knows everything about every flower there is.    But she has this… I don’t know… insight, maybe? Don’t ask me how the flowers are involved, cause I’ve been trying to figure that out my entire life, but she somehow just knows shit. She asks about your favourite flower and whatever response you give, it tells her something more than what you’ve actually said. Almost like it… connects her to you.    I honestly don’t know if it’s an ability or just her extensive understanding of both people and flora, but whatever it is, as far as I know, she’s only ever used it to-...”

   He cut himself off then, as if he’d been about to say something wrong, or inappropriate. He’d been looking around the room while he’d spoken, occasionally flickering back to you, but now that his gaze returned to focus fully on you… you could’ve sworn he was blushing.

   “To… what?” you tried to prompt, but he just cleared his throat and adjusted himself in the sofa.

   “Um, that’s not important right now. I’ll talk to her about staying away from you,” he dodged, and you thought about pushing him to answer, but he seemed uncomfortable enough that you decided not to.

   You’d known him long enough by now to know that he rarely avoided a subject unless there was good cause.    Plus, you already knew that any effort he made to keep his mother away from you probably wouldn’t be successful, and that thought brought you back to your original reason for coming here.

   “Hah, good luck with that,” you cautioned with thickly layered sarcasm.

   “What do you mean?”

   “Only that the point of the weird questions was apparently to assess me for a job, which she then hired me for, without telling me anything about it.    Does she even have the authority to hire people? How much pull does she have here?” you questioned, hoping to learn more about the elusive woman.

   But Marcus looked only baffled.

   “Your guess is as good as mine, really. I’ve never known what my mother does here, besides meddle in everything and bark orders at everyone.    She’s not officially employed here anymore, but given how everyone treats her, it’s safe to say she has a lot of power among the Heroics organization. So, if she wants to give you a job, you can be sure they’ll let her.    She didn’t say anything about the position at all? Not even which branch?”

   “Only that I have to be here at 7am tomorrow if I wanna take it, and the assumption I made was that it would mean I’d be working for her.    But I’m not sure about any of this.”

   His office was a surprisingly comfortable room.    The furniture was all wood, either in light colours or just lacquered so the veins and life of the trees could be seen. And while there was a good-sized desk with an ergonomic chair (the only piece of furniture which wasn’t made of wood), those were pushed into a corner, to make room for the two big, soft, moss-coloured sofas in the middle of the space, where you were now seated.

   There was a small potted plant sat in the middle of the coffee table between you. You didn’t know what type of plant it was, but it suited Marcus somehow.    Beautiful leaves, large but somewhat fragile, growing tightly to conceal the surprisingly thick and sturdy stems, and you got the distinct impression that this plant could take a lot more than anyone thought.

   Seeming more nervous again, he got up and rounded the little table to come and sit down next to you instead, and you had a feeling it was mostly to comfort himself. Not that you ever minded his proximity.

   “I really don’t know what this might be about. She’s never wanted or needed an assistant, but I can’t think of anything else she might want you to do,” he pondered, and you leaned back again so you could see him.

   “I’m just an artisan, a craftswoman. I design logo’s, sew and knit, make sculptures and ceramics, the occasional leather or metalworks. Small things for individual buyers, never anything large scale. I’ve never done anything else.”

   “Maybe she thinks we need re-branding,” he offered, probably as a joke, but at this point, you were about ready to believe anything.

   “Have you heard any discussions about something like that?”

   “Nope.”

   “Shit,” you slumped further and closed your eyes for a moment. “I don’t know what to do.”

   Abruptly restless, you opened your eyes again before getting up and starting to pace about the room, still relishing in the fact that you were even able to stand up without assistance.    But you missed the disappointed look on Marcus’ face as you left his side. And before he could object, you launched into a speech about all the things you’d been mulling over in your head while you’d cleaned your house.

   “I mean, she’s right, I need a job. It’s not like my former employer could just wait for me to get better while a third of her entire workforce was missing, with no word on whether or not I’d even be able to come back. She had to replace me; I get that.    It’s just that it’s a very difficult business to get back into, because most of them are small and privately owned and they hire people they know are good and then stick with them. I should know, I’d been with that company for a decade.    And yeah, I’ve played with the idea of maybe trying to start a business of my own, but that’s not easy, especially when I have no experience or training as a business owner or production manager. Not to mention the economics, taxes, legal crap…”

   You sighed into a grunt as you came to a stop behind the sofa across from Marcus and rested your hands on the back of it.    So much of your life still had to change before anything would have a chance to get back to some manner of normal. And it all seemed so big and difficult, and you didn’t want any more of that. You’d had more than enough of difficult to last you the rest of your life.    In that sense, being offered a job out of the blue was a gift. The problem was, you felt like there was a catch, which meant you didn’t trust it.

   “At the same time, I can’t help but feel that working here… Ugh, I don’t know,” you speculated, somehow feeling trapped. “I can’t see how I could possibly do anything here that would make me feel like I was contributing.”

   “Hey, come here, hermosa,” he suggested, patting the seat next to him.

   You brightened a bit, hearing one of his nicknames for you. You’d gotten so used to them in the past three months, the sounds of them felt like home to you now, even though you didn’t speak Spanish, beyond “hola” and “buenos dias”.    Still, you’d never dared to ask him what those names meant. You had guessed the meaning of some of the words you’d heard him say, like “felicidades” when you’d succeeded on the obstacle course, but about the nicknames, you didn’t know if he was calling you something endearing or just practical.

   Rounding the sofa you’d been standing behind, you sat back down not quite next to him, since you weren’t sure how comfortable you could be with him.    During your recovery, he’d been up close and personal with you every day, having to touch various parts of your body to help your muscles heal. But once that had ended, there was no manual for how to behave anymore. No way to know what was appropriate beyond the professional. And it wasn’t like such a thing ever came up in casual conversation.

   Once you’d settled in, he angled himself towards you, and feeling your temperature rise with his closeness, you begged for an interesting subject to pop into your head.    Fortunately, that was when you suddenly remembered the word his mother had called you when she’d spoken to you. Granted, not the most interesting topic ever, but since things were getting more awkward by the second, you decided it was as good a question as any.

   “What does ‘mujer’ mean?”

   “Woman,” he said without pause, and then cocked his head to the side, probably confused by the apparent randomness of the question. “Why do you ask?”

   “Anita called me that.”

   “Yeah, she does that. She still calls me boy. Chico, or hijo if she’s in a good mood.    She claims it’s just her way of calling it like it is, but I suspect in most cases, it’s just because she doesn’t bother to memorize people’s names,” he tutted, which almost made you snicker because it was such a Marcus thing to do.

   But there was another question burning a hole in your brain, and you were too busy fidgeting with the hem of your shirt, trying to decide if you dared to ask, to fully appreciate his adorable little tut.

   “Oh, I see,” you answered generically, while working up the courage. “Um, since we’re on the subject, I was wondering… about hermosa?”

   He responded by smiling that melting smile of his, damned near taking your breath away.

   “It means beautiful,” he softly explained, and something in his eyes turned liquid and hypnotizing.

   Shit. You just had to go there, and now you were blushing like an idiot, not knowing where to look or what to say or how to behave like a normal fucking person.    He seemed only delighted, though.

   “I’d happily call you something in English, if you’d prefer,” he offered, sounding entirely sincere and much too inviting. “Like sweetheart,” he added, barely over a whisper now.

   But you couldn’t look at him, so you didn’t know if he was being flirty or just friendly. If he was saying that he wanted you to be his sweetheart, or that he just wanted to call you that.    You couldn’t tell if your own desires were tainting what you heard to make it sound more involving and romantic than it actually was.    Coming here had been about discussing his mother and the job, not give yourself more opportunities to fall even harder for the guy.

   You had, though. You’d probably fallen for him the moment you’d first heard his voice that day in the med-chamber. Every day since then had been spent in either denial or a continued attempt to confirm that you had no shot with this man.    It had never been this difficult to be around him when you’d been recovering, even though you’d been attracted to him, because there’d been a professional barrier separating you. It was only in the last few weeks when you hadn’t really needed him anymore, it had started getting out of hand.

   Maybe because against all odds, there could be a slim chance he liked you as more than a friend as well. Or perhaps you just needed to know, either way.    For the moment, all you wanted was for the pressing awkwardness to end.

   “Uh… you can call me whatever you like,” you timidly responded, after what seemed like hours.

   “Thank you,” he replied, with a deep kind of rumbling warmth, and suddenly you had to look at him again, had to know what expression could make his voice sound like that.

   Whatever you might’ve imagined, you were totally unprepared for the desire looking back at you. It had you leaning towards him like he was a magnet.    And amazingly, the moment he realized what you were doing, he responded by quickly closing the remaining distance between you, as though he was afraid something would interrupt if he simply sat back and waited for you to get to him.

   His lips were warm and soft as they moulded to yours, eager, but not demanding, his moustache tickling you in the sweetest way. His hands came up to cradle your jaw, holding you to him with the lightest touch, sending flares of tiny electric pulses through your skin.    The rapid sensory overload had your pulse racing and your entire body flushed with the heat of arousal in the blink of an eye.

   To your own shock and disbelief, both clearly dulled by your libido for the time being, a few seconds later you found yourself clambering onto his lap and straddling him. Your own lips being every bit as demanding as his hadn’t been, and your hands rough and craving against his delicate touch.    But if he was surprised, he didn’t show it. His hands quickly found their way to your thighs and up your back instead, making you shiver with pleasure. Then a throaty grunt of a moan escaped him, and he opened his mouth, as if seeking refuge from the heat of his own body, by begging for entry into yours.

   Panting and grinding yourself against him, feeling him harden underneath you, you were suddenly snapped back to reality by the sound of the phone on his desk ringing.    You froze on his lap and pulled back to stare at him, mortified at your own reaction to what had started out as a simple kiss, literally just seconds ago. Your first kiss, no less.    He grinned as he watched your face go from arousal to panic, and his arms closed tighter around you, holding you to him, while you tried to hide your face in your hands.

   “I’m sorry, I have no idea where that came from, I’ve never done anything like this before, I don’t even know what happened…” you fumbled, wishing you could just run from the room and never come back.

   “Do I look uncomfortable to you?” Marcus smirked, obviously not bothered in the least, and quite completely missing the point.

   “No, but I-…” you tried, but he cut you off.

   “Hermosa… you can attack me any time you like. I’ve wanted to be touched by you for a long time,” he said, still grinning happily, totally oblivious to the storm which was churning inside you.

   “You don’t understand. I’m not like this,” you sighed, looking for the right words, and strangely feeling more comfortable talking about it the longer you went. “I’m not… confident, not about sex. I’ve never been the one to instigate, much less push or demand more. I don’t ever do that, it’s not in my nature.”

   Finally realizing that you weren’t just being bashful, but that your own actions were genuinely frightening you, he frowned while softening his grip around you and stroking your back soothingly.

   “Hey, don’t be scared. I’m not in any hurry with you. If you need to understand this before you’re willing to take things further, then that’s what you need to do.    Just… promise me you won’t shut me out. Please?”

   You stared at him, utterly enthralled, your hands drooping down onto his chest while you tried to process the truths behind his words.    That he was willing to take things slow even though you’d just teased him in the worst conceivable way, just so you’d be comfortable with him. But more than that, he obviously wanted to be included, to be a part of your life. Which wouldn’t matter to him unless he was looking for something long term.    Holy shit. You’d just come here to ask for his advice…

   “Y-You are real, right?” you asked him, so staggered by this revelation that you needed to make sure. “This isn’t some perfect fantasy I dreamed up, is it?”

   His smile came back even wider before he answered, and there was a happy little laughter hiding in every syllable.

   “Of course I’m real, sweetheart. You could never dream up someone so dorky.”

   “You’re not dorky,” you countered with conviction, and you guessed that it was probably the stern look on your face which made his laughter blossom.

   “According to Missy, who’s known me a lot longer than you, I am the Superdork of dorks. But I’m apparently also very lovable,” he finished with a wink, finally making you laugh too.

   “That I can agree with. And I’ll promise not to shut you out if you’ll do the same for me.”

   “Somehow, I get the feeling this is one promise that’ll be easer for me to keep than it will be for you. But I promise.”

   “You might be right, but that’s just because I haven’t had any people in my life I could rely on, ever since I was a kid,” you told him, and the mirth cooled a bit.

   You hadn’t told him anything about your family yet, and you didn’t want to, so you were relieved when he didn’t ask about them.

   “In that case, from now on, I’ll consider it my mission to make sure you always know you can lean on me,” he added to his promise, still smiling so warmly.

   “I don’t know how I can ever deserve you, but I sure as shit won’t turn you down,” you smiled back. “Thank you. For this and everything else. And I promise not to shut you out.”

   He just kept meeting your eyes with unflinching focus, and gently caressed your cheek.    You leaned into the warmth of his hand for a moment, but then you suddenly remembered exactly where you were sitting, and your cheeks began to flush under his gentle touch.

   “Um… I should maybe…” you tried, while you started working to move yourself off his lap.

   His grin widened and his eyes turned playful as he realized what you were blushing about, but he quickly offered you a helping hand to make sure you got up with your dignity intact. Thank goodness you’d opted for jeans today, rather than a skirt or dress.    He straightened himself up a bit on the sofa, and you moved to sit down across from him again, taking a breath to try to cool yourself down.

   Then you both visibly flinched when the door abruptly flung open, and Mrs. Moreno appeared on the threshold.    She didn’t even glace in your direction, keeping her eyes on her son, although she most certainly knew you were there, there was no way she didn’t see you in her periphery. But you also got the impression she’d known before even opening the door. Just like you were sure she knew that something… heated, had happened between her son and you.

   You made a mental note to check the room for cameras or microphones later, because that timing was eerily perfect.

   “Honestly, chico, what’s happened to your manners lately? You can’t even be bothered to answer the phone anymore?” she chided, and you stifled a curse trying to spill from your lips as it dawned on you that it had been her calling earlier, also with impeccable timing.

   “Wow, mom. You barge into my office without even knocking, or saying hello, being extremely rude to my guest, and yet, I’m the one with no manners? Really?” Marcus challenged, clearly truly sick of his mother’s meddling.

   She, on the other hand, was apparently immune to his retorts, completely ignoring his challenge as she turned to you instead.

   “I was not expecting you until tomorrow, but since you’re here, we might as well get started,” she declared, and then swept around and left the room while delivering a final command: “Come along, mujer.”

   “Mrs. Moreno, I-…” you tried, but she was already gone, so you sighed and looked at Marcus who just shook his head, still staring after her. “She’s the one who called? That timing was-…”

   “Don’t even go there,” he cut you off, cautioning you. “She’s omniscient, there’s nothing you can do about it.”

   You looked towards the open doorway and felt yourself frown, although if it was out of confusion or frustration you couldn’t tell.

   “I don’t know if I wanna go after her. I haven’t even decided if I want the job.”

   “Don’t let her push you around, sweetheart. If you want to take the time to think about it, you have every right to,” he reminded you, and you turned your head back to meet his gaze, scrunching your nose up at him in a childish manner.

   “I think I prefer hermosa,” you declared, which brought his grin back, but before he could reply, you heard Anita shout after you from further down the corridor. “On the other hand, I can always resign from a job I’ve already taken, so I could go find out just what it is she wants me to do, and if I don’t like it, at least I’ll know.”

   You sighed with equal parts irritation and sulkiness, then you got up and he mirrored you, cutting you off from leaving by stepping in front of you and taking your hands.

   “Remember, whatever happens, I’m here. If you need anything I’ll be there, and if you can’t find me, call me,” he reassured you, letting his hands slide up your arms and come to rest at the top of your shoulders, before he leaned in and kissed your forehead.

   “Thank you,” you said, closing your eyes and inhaling the scent of him, hoping to bring it with you for extra strength.

   Then Mrs. Moreno shouted again, louder this time, making you growl as you stepped around Marcus to follow her down the corridor.

   “If I haven’t called within the next two minutes, you can go ahead and officially declare me a saint.”

[chungledown-bimothy]

Literally just came here to say that I finally watched the new trailer and as SOON AS Rashawn was shown my first thought was “holy shit thelapinbitch was right”

i mean this in the nicest way possible, i promise. this isn't specifically at you, it's just that i've gotten this quite a bit and it's bizarre to me.

tbh i don't see why more people didn't make the same joke/guess. is it that weird that i'm hyper aware of the rule of three? dropout had the opportunity to do something hilarious, and it's reasonable to guess that, as a comedy platform, they'd see that and take it.

i hope this isn't coming across as rude or like i think i'm smarter than everyone else, because i know i'm not! i guess it's eye opening just how differently i'm wired.

[plutosmainhoe]

Draco Malfoy - Part IV

Master post

______________________________________________________________

Hey, you lost? Unsure of where you are? Have a read the master post

4H Capricorn

The fourth house controls home, ancestry and traditions.

Empty houses in a birth chart do not mean anything bad, it just means that particular house is not a big focus in the natives charts. On average, people will have 3-5 empty houses, Draco has five!

The best way to read an empty house, is to look to the house ruler. We'll get to that shortly.

With Capricorn over the fourth house, Draco is likely to have a deep level of patience and discipline that can lead to long-lasting relationships, whether emotional; or familial. He will be dedicated and committed to the bonds he forms with others, and his practical approach to his health will lead to good physical well-being.

Although, Draco might have the tendency to focus too much on the future, and not enough on the present. Capricorn future-orientated and prepared, this can lead to a lack of enjoyment in the present moment, with the proneness to struggle with allowing emotional expression.

As mentioned in an earlier post, Capricorn, in the nicest way possible, is the boss bitch of the astrological system, and they want shit done. Capricorn has a no bullshit policy and will stand their ground. This, will also apply in the fourth house.

It is likely that Draco comes from a family/home that holds very high expectations and ideals, that Draco needs to uphold. Capricorn is strict, focused and wants results, Draco might find that his family and expectations are hard to manage or fulfil, taking into consideration of his moon placement (This will come in the next part).

Draco is someone that needs support to allow his mental health to function properly. A strict and demanding home-life doesn't support this, it forces Draco to be someone he is not or adhere to the pressures set by his family. And while Draco might understand these expectations to begin with, it is likely he will realise sooner rather than later that he struggles to uphold the standards set within the family.

Where is Saturn?

Saturn, is in the eleventh house. Why do we need to know this?

Each house has a Lord, depending the sign that is over the house. It doesn't matter if there are any planets within the house, the house Lord essentially communicates from the house they are in and brings energy across from their house.

Therefore, Mx Karma Boss Bitch Saturn is the Lord of the fourth, as it is the ruler of Capricorn, however resides in the eleventh house. So what does this mean?

With Saturn bringing energy into the fourth, I am inclined to believe there could be generational family traditions and curses that Draco needs to break, and he needs to use the guidance and help of his friendship and connections to community.

We all know that Draco comes from a pretty harsh home environment, and that he does manage to change his morals and belief system. But I ask you, how, does he do this?

The fourth house is empty, leaving Saturn with a lot of control over the house. Saturn wants Draco to break cycle and be disciplined with his boundaries regarding his family, traditions and emotions, and as it resides in the eleventh, the best way for Draco to do this is to rely on his peers.

Out-source information away from the family and gain a different perspective by creating meaningful connections. Allow himself to be emotionally vulnerable with those he trusts outside of the family. To indulge in community that might differ from his family traditions.

If Draco doesn't release himself from the negative karmic chains of the fourth house, it will affect his mental health negatively, as well as his friendships, hopes and connections to the community. Draco must be able to set boundaries with his emotions and family, as he will likely only receive negative karma to this aspect of his life.

Next, we move on to Draco's fifth house of creativity, talents, hobbies, children/inner child and dating 🧑🏼‍🎨

[dreamescapeswriting]

Hello, i just wanted to give a Feedback if it's ok.

I really love your reactions/oneshots, I just feel like sometimes they feel like something is missing.

Sometimes it feels rushed and not finished.

I really mean it in the nicest way possible really! I hope you don't take it as hate❤️

Hiya darling! That’s totally okay! I welcome feedback otherwise I’ll never grow🥰💕

Thanks! Ah I’m so sorry it comes across that way! Do you think there’s any examples you can give me? I know some of my reactions as of late have been left with “cliffhangers” as sorts because I can’t write a complete fic for each member.

But I’d love to see some of my works you feel I do this with so I can work through it and improve! Or could you tell me what you think would be missing?

I also know some of my writings have been on the shorter side too but sometimes I can’t write too much with what I’m given to work with xx

Thank you so much for bringing this up though as I’m always looking for ways to improve and lately I have felt like my writing is lacking so maybe it is.

Does anybody else have anything else I can look into? (Please don’t send hate to or about this anon they’ve been so lovely 💕💕💕)

[thisfairytalegonebad]

Emptiness - Whumptober day 31

Fandom: Final Fantasy XV Character: Noctis Lucis Caelum Rating: Teen and up Warnings: Mental health issues, specifically discussion of depression and mention of anxiety, some internalised ableism

Read below the cut or on AO3 here.

Noct isn’t quite sure how they ended up like this. Prompto’s his best friend and arguably the person he feels most comfortable discussing stuff with, but Noct’s famously terrible at talking about his feelings in any way, even to Prompto.

But it’s nearly two in the morning, they’re both tired but unwilling to go to sleep, and their game has been paused for so long that the TV has already turned itself off, but neither of them makes a move to turn it back on and resume the game. At some point, they’d started talking, really talking in a way they don’t usually do, and it’s stripping away all of Noct’s emotional barriers.

It’s the sleepover vibes, Prompto explained it a little earlier in his infinite wisdom, and at the time Noct rolled his eyes at him, but now he is starting to think there might be some truth to that.

“It’s just hard, y’know,” he finds himself admitting. “I’m tired all the time even though I sleep so much, and everything is hard, even things that aren’t hard for other people. I mean, who has trouble having a shower or making some cup noodles for lunch?”

“Your magic takes a lot of energy though, doesn’t it?” Prompto points out. He’s curled into the corner of the couch with Noct’s legs across his lap, idly playing with the stretchy part of Noct’s socks as they’re talking. “Other people don’t have to deal with that.”

Prompto has a point, but also not. His dad has never had any problems with any of those things, and he’s keeping up an entire magic wall above the city, and he’s running a country on top of it. Noct has to do none of those things, and he still can’t even manage the bare minimum.

He tells Prompto as much and then adds, “Besides, it’s not even just, homework and cleaning and stuff. Sometimes I can’t even watch a movie or play a game or anything. It’s like I feel completely empty and everything’s a chore, even things I like doing. It’s just all so much effort.”

Noct feels himself getting worked up now, and he makes himself breathe deeply a few times. It’s a very sore subject, one that has been the cause of many arguments between him and the people he loves - Ignis, Gladio, even Dad - and he’s never been able to spell it out quite like this before. He’s never bothered trying to explain before - because it’s embarrassing and stupid, how can he even begin to explain how the mere thought of picking up the trash in his living room makes him want to curl up and die? But the sleepover vibes are doing something to him, something that makes him want to expose the raw, vulnerable parts of himself in the hopes that someone will soothe them.

Prompto leans his head back against the couch, staring at the ceiling in thought. He’s quiet for so long that Noct starts to regret ever saying anything in the first place - Prompto’s probably just trying to figure out the nicest way to tell him to stop being a lazy, whiny brat. Except not in those exact words, because he's Prompto and Prompto's not capable of being mean to anyone, not even to his spoiled best friend.

He’s just about to pull his legs off Prompto’s lap and tell him to forget about it, they can just keep playing their game or go to bed, he’s sorry for making it weird, but then Prompto wraps his hand around his ankle, looks at him, and says, “Buddy, no offense but I think you’re depressed.”

…which is about the last thing Noct expected to come out of his mouth.

“Huh?” he says with all the eloquence he can muster.

Prompto shrugs. “It’s possible, isn’t it?”

“But I’m not-” Noct starts, cuts himself off, gestures aimlessly, tries again. “I’m not sad. I don’t even remember the last time I cried!”

It’s not a lie, if he were sad then that’d be easier to understand than the perpetual exhaustion and emptiness inside him. More than once, he’s even caught himself wishing he could cry. It might bring him some relief, he thinks, but no matter how awful he feels, no tears will come.

“No, dude, not sad. Depressed. As in the mental health condition,” Prompto argues.

Noct stares at him blankly, and Prompto gestures with the hand that isn’t on Noct’s ankle. “Crying’s no requirement. I’m no expert, but your thing sounds a lot like depression to me.”

That’s not… possible, is it? What does Noct even have to be depressed about? He’s a prince, it doesn’t get much better than that, does it? Sure, it sucks a lot of the time and he wishes he weren’t a prince more often than not, but objectively speaking, there’s no one who has less of a right to be depressed than him.

“I don’t think…” he says, then trails off. He’s not quite sure what to say, he wants to deny it, feels like he should deny it, but something makes his voice catch when he tries to, so he asks instead, “Why do you think that?”

Prompto stares at Noct’s leg thoughtfully. “The emptiness thing, mainly? I mean, I’m really no expert, it’s all just stuff I heard somewhere at some point, but I think that’s one that comes up a lot. That, and fun things suddenly no longer being fun.”

That just raises more questions than it answers. For starters, why does Prompto even know so much about that kind of stuff?

When asked, Prompto laughs, a little too high, a little too hysterically before he catches himself. “I’m not depressed if that’s what you’re wondering. I’m just… a little messed up in the head in other places. Anxiety, mostly, but if you research one thing, you just stumble across others sometimes.”

The confession leaves Noct speechless. Guilt coils in his stomach, and something else, something uglier - betrayal? No, he has no right to feel betrayed, Prompto isn’t obligated to disclose anything to him and now he’s told him about it, so there’s really no reason for him to get upset over it.

He shoves the feeling down and locks it up in a little box then throws the key into a metaphorical lake. Prompto doesn’t deserve to be on the wrong end of a hissy fit right now, not when he's listening to Noct more than anyone's ever listened to him before. “I’m sorry. I never knew.”

“I never told you,” Prompto shrugs. “It’s not really a secret, but there’s never been any reason to talk about it. I’ve got it handled, mostly. I have meds and ways to cope and it doesn’t bother me much anymore.”

That… makes sense, and Noct is glad for it, both because it means that Prompto didn’t think he couldn’t trust him with it and because he wants Prompto to be okay and the thought of him suffering makes his insides twist with sorrow.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” he says honestly, and then because Prompto has offered him an explanation for why he’s feeling so awful all the time and he can’t just let it go, “You really think I’m… depressed?”

“I can’t diagnose you or anything, I’m just some guy who spent a little too much time online,” Prompto hurries to say. “But… I think it might be a good idea to talk to someone about it? A professional, I mean. Who knows, maybe something will come of it.”

Noct rolls the idea around in his head, ponders it for a while, and finds he can’t easily dismiss it. He’s been sent to a therapist as a kid, after his accident, but he’s never been particularly cooperative in those sessions and eventually, when he no longer woke up screaming at night, they deemed his recovery as complete as it would get without him actively working towards getting better.

“Okay,” he finally says. “Okay, I… I might. I’ll consider it.”

The idea is both daunting and tempting. He feels stupid walking into a psychiatrist’s office and declaring himself depressed, please fix it, and he’s worried they’d just tell him nothing’s wrong with him, he just sucks at life. It's messed up, to hope that he's actually clinically depressed, but there mere idea of being told that nothing is wrong with him after all makes him want to cry now that Prompto's planted the idea in his head. But on the off chance that this could actually be a solution, a way to make everything less hard, to fill him back up with emotions good and bad… he wants that, and he wants it badly enough that he thinks he might be maybe willing to take the risk.

Prompto squeezes his ankle and grins at him. His eyes are drooping and his smile is slightly lopsided - they’re both overdue for some sleep, probably - but his expression is open and sincere as he pats Noct’s leg and says, “Considering it is a good place to start.”

It’s a little strange, hearing so much wisdom from Prompto in one night, but his words have opened something in Noct, something tentative and hopeful, and he doesn’t have the heart to try and lighten the mood with a jab at Prompto for it.

“Think we should sleep,” he says instead. It’s a bit of an abrupt end to their conversation, but Noct doesn’t think he has the emotional capacity to say anything more to Prompto’s face about his maybe-depression right now. He feels raw and exposed and suddenly, he just wants to sleep.

They head to bed, conveniently ignoring their toothbrushes in the bathroom, and then they curl up in Noct’s bed for some much-needed sleep.

Sleep doesn’t come for Noct just yet, though, and after a while, when Prompto’s breathing has evened out in something that Noct knows to be his almost-asleep state, he whispers into the dark, “Hey Prompto?”

“Mmmm?” Prompto responds sleepily, and he sounds dazed enough that Noct feels safe to continue.

“Thanks,” he says quietly. “For… the advice. And for trusting me with your thing.”

He’s not sure how much of it actually reaches Prompto’s brain - he doesn’t get much more of a response than the first time - but it soothes his own mind enough that he can fall asleep as well.

----

Read all of my Whumptober prompt fills here.