#i miss tera so much i never imagined it would go down...

[liberty-spiked]

i hope i can play maple story on my laptop because holy fuck do i crave mmos.

[shiloh-the-pokemon]

Off-Screen Post

Shiloh didn't make it far before needing to camp for the night. They ended up finding a small pond surrounded by trees and rested in the shade, though not before snarfing down some berries.

They woke up the next morning as a Raboot. It was always nice to have hands. They checked their satchel to make sure they had both their phone and the Tera shard, and kept going.

Shiloh continued walking, snacking on whatever berries they found. They missed their diet of sandwich ingredients dearly. That, and sleeping under a roof. And their friends at the Elite Four.

So how lucky for them to spot Larry in the distance, just on the outskirts of a town.

"you have to be shitting me." Shiloh whispered under their breath to no one in particular.

Shiloh ducked behind a bush before Larry could see them. They had no idea why Larry, of all people, was just outside this town.

Shiloh desperately wanted to avoid him, or more accurately his Pokemon. Shiloh imagined Larry would not care much, he was fairly apathetic about anything outside his paycheck. But Staraptor? Or Flamigo? Any one of Larry's Pokemon would ask terrifying, probing questions. Like, "Where have you been?" and "Are you okay?".

Secretly, a part of Shiloh ached to dive out from behind that bush and see Flamigo. They could steal a few bucks out of Larry's wallet, and kick vending machines until they got all the chips they could feast on.

As far as Shiloh saw it, things couldn't go back to normal though, not now. Not when their wounds were so fresh, and not until Shiloh knew who they were.

So they took the first oppurtunity to run north. As far as they could tell, Larry didn't spot them, or he simply didn't care.

Shiloh kept running until their legs begged for them to stop. Then they returned to another leisurely stroll. They found a river, and walking downstream gave them a lucky bridge. A bit of water could not stop them, even as a fire type.

A lot of water, however, could. A lake, for example, might prove too challenging. A lake such as, say, Casseroya Lake.

Even on a cloudy day, Shiloh could not deny that the lake was beautiful. They stood for a while watching the water. For some time, they were mesmerized, their thoughts silent. Though eventually, their thoughts began to spiral once more into a complicated and painful identity crisis. The usual.

They forced themself out of it with one simple thought, "how do i get across this big frickin lake?"

Shiloh slowly walked west along the lake's shore, staring at the water. They thought aloud, muttering just under their breath. "im gonna neeed a big frickin bridge i tell ya. or an abandoned boat with oars. thatd be fun. paddle across the lake. til the boat breaks, i guess. thatd be a yikes moment."

Shiloh continued muttering to themself for several minutes. They were abruptly stopped when they bumped into someone.

"Mind yourself, now."

"sorry, got distracted." Shiloh muttered.

"Boats, yes?"

"oh, uh, yeah. thinking about finding a boat and paddlin across this lake."

"Something across the lake? Or perhaps, someone?"

"uh, no. to neither. just going, i guess."

Shiloh kept walking, staring now at the ground in front of them. Until the person behind them called out, "Do you need a ride?"

"oh shit you got a boat?" Shiloh whipped their head around to the stranger.

"oh shit," They thought, "i shoulda watched where i was walking."

The stranger walked up to them and looked down, "Suicune, by the way. You?"

Shiloh was getting nervous. This was a legendary Pokemon, they had never met a legendary Pokemon. They had been a legendary Pokemon, many times, but this was a true blue legendary. At the time, Shiloh was a just a tiny Raboot. Suicune could squash them with the might of a thousand waterfalls, if it so pleased.

"oh- um, uh- my- my name? i got one of those?"

Suicune turned their head in confusion, "Yes, and it is?"

Shiloh looked anywhere else but Suicune, "its- uh- its really cool. i tell ya that."

"Well, Really Cool, you need a ride?"

A ride from a legendary? That was unthinkable! And possibly blasphemous? Shiloh had no idea at this point.

Shiloh's voice cracked. "yeah thats super nice you have a boat or something?"

Suicune lowered itself to the ground, "I am the boat."

Well, Shiloh sure felt like an idiot right now. They walked up to Suicune, "do i just," They grabbed onto its purple mane and swung a leg around. Their voice cracked again "does that work i can get off if it doesnt its fine really if-"

Suicune abruptly stood up. Shiloh gripped its mane with all the strength they had. Suicune looked back at them, "Hold tight, Really Cool."

[writer1]

A regretful Wolf and his Beauty

Chapter Eight

Beast!Rex x Fem!reader

Summary: As punishment for his actions, young prince Rex was cursed to become a monster by a witch. The only thing that saved him from his fate was an enchantress, who gave him a condition. He has to find true love in order to redeem himself and he only has until the last petal of the enchanted rose falls. Rex's family helps you by guiding your way into his heart. Rex's fate now lies in your hands.

A/N: This is a collaborative fic with @ahsokatano-thetogruta. 

Warnings: harassment, Hurt, injury, wolf attack.

Twelve and a half years later…

"(y/n)?" You hear a couple of knocks at your bedroom door. "Are you awake yet, Sweetie?" 

"Yeah, I'm awake, Papa." He hears your muffled voice from the other side of the door, making him smile. "Okay, I'll go and make you some breakfast."

"Thank you, I'll be down in a bit." You call to him as he heads downstairs. You blink your eyes open to see the sun shining through your curtains, brightening up the room. Getting out of bed, you head over to the corner of your room where your armour sits on its stand. You grab your clothes that go under it, putting them on. Piece by piece, you strap the armor to your body securely, making sure that nothing is loose so it won't fall off.

Once fully armoured, you head downstairs to the kitchen where your Papa, Bail, has set out the table with cutlery and has almost finished making breakfast. "How are you this morning, Shiny?" You smile at the nickname as you sit down in your usual place at the table. "I'm good thank you." You remember how the nickname came to be, female knights weren’t exactly… encouraged in your village. 

The boys that trained with you would make fun of you and called you Shiny. It means naive for knights, but you stuck it to them when you took a liking to the name and kept it. Now no one calls you by anything but Shiny. You’re almost positive that some people have forgotten your given name. You start eating your breakfast, wondering what's going to happen today in this boring town.

xxx

You begin to sing out as you leave your house "Little town, it's a quiet village. Every day like the one before. Little town full of little people, waking up to say…" 

You hear the Townsfolk greeting one another as you walk through town.

You gesture to a bigger set twi’lek man. “There goes the baker with his tray, like always. The same old bread and rolls to sell, every morning just the same. Since the morning that we came, to this poor provincial town, never an adventure for a knight.” 

The baker walks over to you. "Good morning, Shiny." You turn to him with a smile. "Good morning monsieur."

"Where are you off to?" He asks, it's not very often that you don't stay in your yard to train. You smile, holding up the book you have in your hand. "The bookshop, I just finished the most wonderful story. It was about a beanstalk, and an ogre, and a---" 

"That's nice. MARIE the baguettes, hurry up." The baker walks away, you huff. You never have anyone to talk to about books, or being a knight. Besides your father. 

The Townsfolk talk to each other as you pass by, all dressed in your armor and feeling proud wearing it. "Look, there she goes. The girl is strange, no question, wanting to be a knight like all the men.

She's dazed and distracted, can't you tell?"

"Never part of any crowd."

"Cause her head's up on some cloud

No denying she's a funny girl, that Shiny." You walk through as you see so many different people and aliens talking to each other.

"Bonjour."

"Good day!"

"How is your family?" a Chiss man asks another Togrutan woman.

"Bonjour."

"Good day."

"How is your wife?" A human woman asks another human man. His wife hits him in the head with a rolling pin, making you flinch.

"I need....six eggs." 

"That's too expensive!"

"There must be more than this provincial life!" You sing out as you walk through town. You walk into the bookstore.

“Ah, Shiny. It’s good to see my favorite knight in here.” You smile at Tera Sinube, he is a retired Cosian knight, now a librarian. He tells stories of working in a castle to protect a king and queen. The castle was filled with their family. It was a big family, as he says.

“Good morning. I've come to return the book I borrowed” you hand him over the book.

He looks surprised as he chuckles. “Finished already?”

“Oh I couldn't put it down. Have ya got anythin' new?” You ask looking around the bookstore at the variety of fantasy books. You climb up on one of the ladders.

“Not since yesterday.” Tera Sinube chuckle's out again.

“That's alright. I'll borrow this one!” You grab a familiar book, handing it to librarian Sinube. “That one? But you've read it twice!” He laughs out. “Well it's my favourite. With far off places, daring sword fights, magic spells, a prince in disguise!” you tell him as you move the ladder with wheels so that you glide to him.

“Well, you will have your own adventures with daring sword fights some day, but if you like it all that much, it's yours!” you feel surprised “But sir?!?” He hands you the book, smiling.

"I insist, Shiny!" He gestures that it's no problem, your eyes sparkle with excitement “Well thank you, thank you very much!” You exit the shop into the busy street. You start reading the book as soon as you leave, you know the town well enough that you won’t get hurt.

“Look, there she goes, that girl is so peculiar

I wonder if she's feeling well.”

A group of girls stare at you as you walk by them, they don't sing but they grumble. “With a dreamy, far-off look.” some of the men sing, but you don't hear them. “Always training and her nose stuck in a book.” some of the other women sing.

“What a puzzle to the rest of us is Shiny.” the whole town sings, but you don't hear it at all while reading.

Your eyes widen when you read your favourite part of the book “Ohhhhhh....isn't this amazing?! It's my favorite part because....you'll see. Here's where she meets Prince Charming, but she won't discover that it's him till chapter three!”

“Now it's a wonder that her name doesn’t mean beauty. Her looks have got no parallel” A Twi'lek woman peers out of the window of her home.

A shopkeeper stands by the door of his shop “But with that tough façade, I'm afraid she's rather odd. Very different from the rest of us.”

“She's nothing like the rest of us

Yes, different from the rest of us is Shiny.” The whole townsfolk sing, then Maul walks into the picture, but you walk past him and his naive, eleven and a half year old follower Ezra Bridger. “Wow you didn't miss a shot Maul! You're the greatest hunter in the whole world!”

“I know.” A red Zabrak with black tattoos, named Maul, runs his hand over his head, feeling the small horns.  

“No beast alive stands a chance against you, haha...and no girl for that matter.”

“It's true Ezra, and I've got my sight set on that one.” Maul crouches down to the eleven year old boy, pointing towards you walking by. 

Ezra is surprised. "The inventor's daughter!? The only female knight in town!!?” Maul nods at him, eyes trained on you. “She's the one, the lucky girl I'm going to marry.”

“But she's--” Ezra tries to add in but he gets interrupted. “The most beautiful girl in town”

“I know but--”

“That makes her the best! and don't I deserve the best?” Maul crouches down to the boy, getting in his face, scaring Ezra.

“Well of course, I mean ya do, but I…” Ezra mumbles something, but Maul begins to sing.

“Right from the moment when I met her, saw her, I said she's gorgeous and I fell. Here in town it's only she, who's as beautiful as me. So I'm making plans to woo and marry, Shiny.”

Three Twi'lek triplets swoon at Maul. "Look there, he goes! isn't he dreamy?

Monsieur Maul! oh, he's so cute!

Be still, my heart! I'm hardly breathing!

He's such a tall, dark, strong, and handsome brute!" They sing together as Maul tries to get through the crowd of villagers.

“Bonjour.” one man yells out. “Pardon!” Maul asks as he tries to get through the crowd.

“Good day.” “Mais oui!” Maul keeps getting blocked by people, no matter what way he goes. “You call this Bantha?” one man exclaims to a vender. “What lovely Meilooruns!” a Chiss woman tells another.

“Some cheese…” “Ten yards!”  “One Credit.” Maul pushes his way through. “`Scuse me!”  “I'll get the knife.” the cheese merchant tells the customer.

“Please let me through!!” Maul demands. “This bread.” “Those fish.” “It's stale.” “They smell!” Maul can't believe that the streets have to be this busy on this particular day.

“Madame's mistaken!” the Baker exclaims angrily.

 “There must be more than this provincial life!” You sing out again, wishing for more adventure.

Maul strutting through the crowd

“Just watch....I'm going to make Shiny my wife!” He's still unable to get to you.

"Look there she goes....a girl who's strange but special. A most peculiar mademoiselle." The whole town sings again, but you hear none of it, you once again have your nose in your book.

"It's a pity and a sin, she doesn't quite fit in. Cause she really is a funny girl. A beauty but a funny girl. She really is a funny girl.....that Shiny!!" The whole town sings, followed by many bonjours before they all close their doors and windows, going back to their business, finished with the song.

You shrugged as you went back to reading your book. A second later, someone jumps down in front of you. “Hello, Shiny.” you recognize his voice. “Bonjour, Maul.” you greet him, reluctantly looking up from your book. 

While he had your attention, Maul snatched the book from your hands. You feel annoyed, but you are still polite to him. “Maul, can I have my book back please?”

Maul opens the book, looking at it closely while you try to take it back from him. He huffs as he struggles to read it. “How can you read this? There are no pictures." You step back and cross your arms “Well, sometimes you just gotta use your imagination.” Maul's eyes widen and then he turns around to you, smirking.

”Shiny, you need to get your head out of those books.” He throws your book behind him into a puddle. “You need to focus on more important things.” he steps in front of you before you could get to your book. “Like me.” 

Off to the side of the street, a group of girls sigh dreamily as they admire Maul. 

"The whole town's talking about it. It's not right for a woman to read, let alone be a knight. That's a man's job. Soon she starts getting ideas, and thinking." Maul starts to sound almost like he's grossed out, making you mad. You earned your place among the knights, and he has no right to tell you otherwise. You pick up your book, turning to him.

"Maul, you are positively primeval. I can be whatever I want to be, and I'm a knight." Maul huff's at you, but brings back his smile.

"Right… Right. What do you say you and me take a walk over to the tavern, and take a look at my trophies?" Maul starts pulling you towards the tavern, you've had enough. No more nice Shiny.

"No." You tell him, ripping your arm out of his grip. You give him a challenging smirk. "What's wrong with her" "she's crazy." "He's gorgeous." The triplets say in rapid succession, as you try to walk away from Maul.

"I have to get home to help my father now, Maul. Maybe some other time. Goodbye." You tell him, a little too happily. Then you hear the snickering coming from young Ezra.

"That crazy old loon, he needs all the help he can get." The young boy laughs as Maul joins in.

"Ezra Bridger, don't you dare talk about my father that way!" You yell, Maul stops laughing. He fixes Ezra with a stare that the boy knows means that he's going to get a beating when they get home.

"Yeah, don't talk about her father that way!" You are mad. "My father is not crazy, he's a genius." They suddenly hear an explosion and you go running. Leaving Maul and Ezra's laughing behind.

xxx

You rush into your house, running straight to the basement. You grab your helmet on the way down, just in case there is flying debris. It wouldn't be the first time. "Papa!" You call out through the smoke, coughing. "Papa!!" You yell again, almost down to your father's workshop.

"How in the force did that happen?!" You hear Bail yell out as the smoke starts to clear. "Are you alright, Papa?" You see him stuck beneath some rubble, so you reach your hands out and close your eyes, concentrating. The wood and machinery parts start to lift up into the air.

"Thank you, Shiny." He sighs with frustration. "I'm about to give up with this hunk of junk!" You chuckle at him.

"You always say that." He kicks his invention and storms away from it. "I mean it this time. I'll never get this boneheaded contraption to work!"

You smile and shake your head, walking over to him. "Yes you will. And you'll win first prize at the fair tomorrow." Bail raises an eyebrow at you crossing his arms, turning away from you in a huff "Hmph."

"And become a world famous inventor." You smile at him as he turns his head round "You really believe that?" He doesn't sound so convinced. 

"I always have." You give him a promising smile. Bail soon feels so much better from your words of support. "Well, what are we waitin' for?" He runs over to his invention. "I'll have this thing fixed in no time!" Grabbing a spanner, he gets to work on his machine. 

"Now, did you have a good time in town today?" Your father asks as you get your training dummy ready. "It was good, Papa. I got a new book!" You grab your sword, then go at the dummy, using all the techniques you've been taught.

"Papa? Do you think that I'm odd?" 

"My daughter! Odd! Huh, where would you get an idea like that?" Bail asks as he slides out from under the machine, his magnifying goggles making his eyes look hilariously huge. You laugh as you continue practicing your sword fighting, but get sad again. Your father slides back underneath the machine.

"Oh… I don't know, it's just that everyone thinks I'm different. Especially since I'm a knight, I'm not sure that I fit in here, Papa. There's no one I can really talk to." You stop fighting the dummy, sheathing your sword. "Well, what about that Zabrak fellow… Maul, right? He's a handsome young man." 

You huff, feeling sickened at the thought of talking to that oaf. "Oh, he's handsome… and rude, also conceited. That guy is definitely not for me." 

"Well, don't worry. This invention will be a start of a new life for us, you will get your dreams of being a knight. And I know for sure that you will find someone perfect for you!" 

You roll your eyes with a laugh. "Sure Papa, but I know that no one will ever want to be with me. I'm too odd, too different for someone to love." Your father sighs, finally coming out from underneath his invention. 

"Now, that's not true. Now I think that I've finally done it, Sweetheart. Let's give it a try!" Your father pulls a lever, and you hear a whistle. You put your helmet on and pull your father behind you, just to be safe. You wait, and finally the invention is chopping wood, just like it's supposed too. You smile, your father's finally done it.

"It works." Bail hears the excitement in your voice, making him equally as joyful. "It does?" He looks towards the machine that continues to chop up the wood. "It does!" He shouts out with joy.

You love how excited your father is about his working invention. "You did it! You really did it!" You give him a big hug and jump with joy. 

"Hitch up Threepio, Shiny. I'm off to the fair!" He cheers out, overjoyed that his invention really works.

xxx

"Goodbye, Papa. Good luck!" You wave your father off as Threepio pulls along the invention, neighing as he trots with Bail on his back. "Goodbye, Shiny! And take care while I'm gone!"

Bail travels across the land, through fields and over mountains, taking in the scenery around him. He crosses over a small bridge and enters a dark, gloomy forest. Threepio keeps his head down low, feeling nervous. "We should be there by now." Bail sounds confused, looking up to see a green and white Convor sitting on a tree branch, watching him as he passes.

"Maybe we missed a turn. I guess I should've taken the- wait a minute." He lifts up his lantern to a sign, reading it. Threepio's ear twitches, then he turns to the left of the path, but he gets pulled by his lead. "No, let's go this way."

Threepio shakes his head and looks down the path that Bail wants to take, eyes widening as the poor horse sees the foggy, dark path. He looks to the left again, seeing that it's much more pleasant. Threepio attempts to go left again, but Bail refuses. "Come on, Threepio! It's a shortcut, we'll be there in no time!" The horse trots on into the dark woods. Feeling more and more nervous with each passing second.

Suddenly, something not too far away runs past them. Threepio startles, looking around for the danger, backing up with fear in his eyes. Bail looks confused at the map. "This can't be right." A howl echoes deep within the forest, making him look up from his map and hold out his lantern. "Where have you taken us, Threepio?" 

Threepio backs up even more, ready to leave as soon as possible. Worry fills Bail. "We better...turn around." The constant sounds of howling frightens the horse, backing up into a tree, causing a cloud of bats to fly around the both of them. Threepio begins to gallop away as fast as he can. "Woah! Woah Boy!" Threepio halts as they come to the edge of a cliff "Back up! Back up!" He does as he's told, Bail sighs. "Good boy, good boy. That's Good that's- back up! Steady, steady. Stead- Woah!" Threepio bucks, causing Bail to fall to the ground. His lantern bursts into flames causing his horse to run away, a couple of wolves chasing after him. 

Bail gets up off of the ground "Threepio!" He loudly whispers. Nothing. Bail stands up off the ground, he turns to see wolves coming towards him. He starts running as fast as he can, hearing the howls and growling behind him. He tumbles down a cliff, coming to a stop at a gate. He quickly jumps up, running and grabbing on to the bars.

“HELP!!! Please, is someone there!!!” he calls. “HELP!!!” he calls one more time before the gates suddenly open, he falls to the ground, slamming them closed with his foot, saving him from the wolves. A wolf bites his pant leg, but Bail kicks it off. It starts to rain as he walks up to the gloomy castle, Bail knocks at the door and it immediately creaks open, he walks inside. It looks much more cosy inside than out, but it's still dark. 

“Hello?” he asks into the darkness, hoping to ask the owner if he could stay the night, but it seems abandoned. “Hellooo?” he suddenly hears whispers. “The fellow must have lost his way in the woods!” it whispers before being shushed. “Keep quiet! If we’re quiet he might leave, Fives! You know how dangerous this could be.” Bail can’t seem to find where the voices are coming from.

“Is someone there?” Bail asks, trying to find the voices' owners. “Not a word, Fives! Not one word!”

“I’m sorry to intrude, but I lost my horse, and I need a place to stay, just for the night?” 

“Aww, Echo, have a heart, Vod.” Echo presses a metal hand against Fives’ wax mouth. “Shhh!” Fives sighs, placing his one candle against his brothers hand. “ OW, ow! ow! Owww!” Echo starts hopping around.

“Of course. You are certainly welcome here, kind sir.”

“Who said that?” Bail grabs the candlestick, making Fives surprised as he's picked up, Echo is worried for his twin. Fives then smiles as he taps his shoulder. "Over here." Fives calls out.

Bail is confused, looking around. “Where?” Fives taps Bail's head, making him turn to see the candlestick looking at him, smiling at him “Hello.” 

A gasp escapes Bail as he drops the candlestick. Fives groans as he hits the ground, making his candles burn out. "Incredible." Bail leans down to take a closer look at the candlestick who just spoke. 

“Now you've done it, Fives!” Echo hops down from the table and crosses his arms.  “Splendid, just peachy- AHHH!” He screams as he is lifted off the ground.

“How is this accomplished?” Bail's expression is full of amazement as he turns the clock around to examine it. Echo is a little afraid. “Put me down at once!”

Bail turns Echo upside down and shakes him about. Fives just watches and chuckles at his Twin. Then Echo gasps as Bail opens up his little glass door and starts digging around. “Now to take you apart and see how you tick.” Bail whispers, he has no idea that this is a living being. Fives gasps as Echo screams, Fives turns and screams as loud as his voice will allow. “ REX!!!!!!” There's a roar and Bail freezes as a giant Wolf-like creature with blonde fur runs down the stairs, followed by four suits of armor and a desk shuffling behind them, seemingly having a hard time. The wolf’s honey brown, yellowish eyes widen when he sees Bail holding the clock in one hand, and a gear from it in the other.

“ECHO!!! Let go of him, NOW!!” The wolf runs over to Bail, who drops the clock and the gear, Rex runs and catches them, handing both over to Fives, that's when he stands to full height, he’s much, much taller than any man Bail had ever seen. “What have you done to my brother.” he growls angrily, standing as close as he can to Bail, showing his large, sharp teeth. “B-Brother? But that's a clock!”

“Yes, and you hurt him!" Rex's deep voice sends shivers down Bail's spine as he looks towards the clock cradled in the candlestick's arms while a suit of armor with orange feathers on its helmet puts the gear back into Echo's body. 

Bail tries to run away, but Rex runs on all fours, stopping in front of him to prevent him from leaving. “Please! I-I meant no harm! I just needed a place to stay!” Rex growls deeply. “I'll give you a place to stay, and for what you did to my brother, you deserve it!” Rex grabs Bail as he storms off deeper into the castle, leaving everyone else to make sure that Echo is okay now and that nothing harmful has happened to him.

xxx

Rex sighs as he walks back up the stairs from the dungen, he can’t believe that that man had hurt Echo, it wasn’t right. He runs up, immediately seeing his brothers. Fives and Echo are standing on Cody, with Obi Wan beside them. “Is he okay?” Rex asks as he walks over, he's on two legs at the moment.

“I’m fine, Ori’Vod. Just a little sore.” Rex sighs in relief, his brothers are only twenty one at the moment, the curse had slowed their aging a little. They get a letter when they do age a year. It's weird. “I’m glad you’re okay.” Rex whispers, kneeling down and nuzzling the little clock. Echo chuckles, reaching up and placing a hand on Rex’s nose.

“It’s okay, Vod. You know that I’m fine, but you should let that man go.” Rex pulls away, eyes narrowing. “No, he could have killed you, Echo. He’s staying in the dungeon where he belongs.” Rex holds back a growl, he's so angry at what that man did. When Fives screamed and then he came running down to see Echo with one of his gears out, it scared the living daylights out of him. He had believed that he was going to lose his little brother. “Hey!” Rex looks down to Cody nudging his leg.

“It’s okay, Rex’ika. Echo’s fine. We are all fine.” Rex sighs “I was scared, I didn't want to lose Echo… but I am not letting that man go. And that's final!” he turns around, his cape and tail swishing behind him as he storms off into the castle. 

xxx

“Oh boy! Shiny's going to get the surprise of her life! Huh Gaston?” Ezra looks at Maul who stares at your house, wanting to propose and marry you today. “Yes, this is her lucky day.” Maul turns to leave, letting the branch he was holding swing back a little into Ezra's face, but Ezra just shakes it off and follows Mail to the party. 

Maul clears his throat. “I'd like to thank you all for coming to my wedding. But first...I better go in there and propose to the girl.” He says with a wink and laughs, so everyone else laughs too. The three girls are crying that they aren't the ones to marry him. “And you, Ezra” He presses his finger on Ezra's nose “When Shiny and I come out of that door-”

“Oh! I know, I know!” Ezra exclaims excitedly. “I tell the band to start playing!” he gestures to the group of Bith aliens to play some music. Maul feels annoyed. “Not yet!” 

Ezra quickly stops the band from playing and feels a bit guilty. “Sorry.”

You are lost in your book when you hear a sudden knock at your door, making you jump. You quickly get up and place your book on the table, making a note of the page that you are on. You brush back your hair out of your face a little as you reach for your father's invention that allows you to see who's at the door with having to open it. You peek through the scope to see Maul. You groan “Ugh.” 

Being the polite person you are, you open the door. “Maul, what a pleasant surprise.” he just grins at you. “Isn't it though? I'm just full of surprises.” he walks closer to you, making you back away from him. “Y'know, Shiny. There's not a girl in town who wouldn't love to be in your shoes. This is the day…” He stops to check himself in the mirror. “This is the day your dreams come true.”

“What do you know about my dreams, Maul?” You find his big ego pretty amusing, so you hold back a laugh and try to be as kind as you can. “Plenty! Here, picture this...” he sits down on a chair and puts his muddy boots up on the table on top of your book. “A rustic hunting lodge, my latest kill roasting on the fire, my little wife massaging my feet.” You feel disgust when he takes his boots off and wiggles his toes. You hold your nose to block out the stench. “While the little ones play on the floor, with the dogs.” He stands up right in front of you. “We'll have six or seven.

“Dogs?” you really hope that that's the right answer as you brush the mud off of your book “No, Shiny! Strapping boys, like me.” You try to be enthusiastic and play along. “Aheh, imagine that…”

As you walk away, he creeps up behind you. “And you know who that little wife will be?” you snap your book shut, not wanting to know in the slightest. “Hm, let me think.” you turn around to see Maul right in your face.

“You, (y/n).” You duck under his arm and back away from him yet again, really wishing that you hadn’t left your sword in your room, you also feel uncomfortable with him using your given name. “Maul. I'm... I'm speechless.” you're back all the way up to the door. You put your hand on your chest. “I really don't know what to say!”

Maul backs you up to your front door, placing his hands on it either side of you. “Say you will marry me.” you look up at him as you try and find the door handle. “Im sorry, Maul. But…” you found the handle. “I will never, ever marry anyone, especially you!” you say, opening the door wide open, making Maul fall out of the front door and into a puddle. He goes to lift his head up, but you use the force to make sure that he gets a mouthful of mud. Maul looks up angrily, wiping the mud from his face. The band starts playing, Maul stands up, walking over to Ezra.

“So? How’d it go, Maul?” The eleven year old asks, but Maul cuffs him. “Shiny will be mine, have no doubt about that.” Maul storms off, Ezra following close behind him.

xxx

“Is he gone?” You ask a little while later as you walk out to feed the chickens, you’re wearing your armor as usual. “Oh, can you imagine? He asked me to marry him. Me, the wife of that boorish, brainless...” you growl as you tell the chickens. Then you start singing. "Madame Maul! Can't you just see it? "Madame Maul! His "little wife", ugh!” You kick over the bucket of chicken feed angrily. 

“No sir! Not me! I am a knight! Never a wife!” you sing in disgust. The thought of being someone's wife disgusts you, especially if it's Maul’s.  “I want much more than this provincial life! I want adventure in the great wide somewhere. I want it more than I can tell.”

“And for once it might be grand. To have someone understand. I want so much more than they've got planned.” You hear a horse's whinny, as Threepio runs up. “Threepio? What are you- Wait! Where's papa, where is he threepio?” You know that something must have happened, you run into your house, grabbing your helmet and sword. You run back down, jumping onto threepio’s back.

“Take me to Papa.” The horse runs off with you on his back, you will find your father, if it is the last thing you do.

taglist: @ellie1366 @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @lightning-wolffe  @pinkiemme

@captainrexisboo

[exodusmc]

Written in the stars

Genre: soulmate au, werewolf au, angst, fluff

Words: 1667

Paring: Werewolf Seungcheol x human reader

Warning!: Hinting to feeling very low and alone

a/n: I hope you know you shouldn’t follow a starnger :) btw I want to start writing for seventeeen cus I love them

gif is not mine 

Watching the stars was what you loved the most, how they shone so bright while they were so far away, how they could still sparkle while the moon hung heavy in the sky. It was like they were a force which couldn't be taken down, like they would be up there forever.

The hill was in the outskirts of the city, edging to the forest standing tall and dark. You would come here whenever you felt down or the sky had lit up by the millions of stars, unfortunately were your reason the first one now. 

Tears rolled down your cheeks, quiet and somehow invisible. You had always wondered how the people around seemed so oblivious to your pain, the hurt behind every smile, but over the time had you learned that it was your own fault for laying your happiness in their hands. If you just could talk to someone, everything would change, but you couldn't and was left to wither like the flowers during autumn. A shaky sigh left your lips, back pressed against the grass, and now were you somewhere else but on earth, a place where everything was magical and nothing hurt. 

“Are you okay?”a voice broke your dream, made you sit up fast with wide eyes. Teras still fell down your face so you tried to dry them as fast as you could while the boy with raven hair and eyes like the sky above your head stared. He seemed concerned, a white shirt hanging loosely over his shoulders. It was odd in a way, since you were bundled up in a winter jacket and he was dressed so lightly.”Are you hurt?”

“N-no..”you sounded so weak in your own ears, sending shame right down your bones. He had caught you in your most vulnerable moment and you hated it.”..I’m fine..”

“Are you sure..?”the more you looked at him, the more relaxed you felt. He had a kind face, upper lip a bit bigger than the under and warm orbs. He was on the fairer side but you wouldn't call him pale.

“Yes..”he only shrugged to your answer, sitting down by your side but with a distance so you wouldn't feel uncomfortable. You watched as he gazed at the stars, how he mirrored them, and then he smiled, a gummy smile which made your heart race. 

“Can you see Orion’s belt? It’s over there..”you finally managed to tear your eyes from his to watch where he pointed. His finger drew lines over the sky, connected the stars until they made pictures. All over the sky were small stories of people before you, they who had maped the heaven for everyone after. 

You stayed with him for a long time, so long the first rays of the sun slowly peeked over the city. It surprised you slightly, the way he made you forget the world with just his voice, the soft melody of tones making you fly so far away from the grey. 

“It’s morning…”

“It is..”you hadn't meant for it to be a question, just a simple statement which he answered with those lips and eyes, deep as the sky is wide. 

“..I should go..”but you didn't want to leave him, this stranger who regarded life a little different, saw it through the night instead of the day. 

“..You probably should…”no one moved, just watched the other as if to remember every line crossing over their face. He truly was breathtaking, born to meet you on the hill where grass was green. 

So you sat, back leaving the ground as eyes found the city line. He did the same, shoulders brushing against the other, sparking life in your numb limbs. This stranger pulled you to him without reaching for you, had you trembling with no more than the feel of his shirt. He had made you forget about your hurt with just his presence and you didn't even know his name. 

“Who are you?” if you had been with someone else, the question would have sounded stupid to your ears, sent embarrassment to colour your cheeks, but with him were you just curious and maybe a little scared, because what if he was just a dream? A dream too good to be true?

“I’m sorry…”and with that was he running away, disappearing into the thick forest hiding everything from the world. You had been right, he had been someone you weren't worthy of having, just your imagination losing its grip. A new tear rolled down your cheek, cracking the euphoric feeling you so greedily hogged. The world is just cruel, luring you with beauty that is more than a face, luring you with the beauty of a soul. 

-

Oh how you hurt that week, felt every stab at your heart as your life slowly went on. He never left you dreams, a smile which haunted you, ripped your skin from your bones so you would feel naked. Pain and pain and pain and pain. 

Saturday was your saving grace, a day you didn't have to do anything, a night you could spend by your safe space. Only he had changed it, dulled it just a bit. Looking around, you felt like there was a missing piece to the puzzle, a tree too little or a stone too much, all because of him and his smile. 

“..Hello..” and there he was again, sheepishly watching you with those drowning orbs. If you would describe his expression would it be like a puppy who had done something it knew it shouldn't have.”How have you been?”

You wanted to hit him, scream all your pain he made you feel, but just sat there, watching, waiting for him to come. 

His hair hung down his forehead, hiding his eyes just a bit, making him glance from under them. You could tell he studied you, careful with every move you made. He knew he had hurt you and oh how much pain he felt too. 

“Why’d you leave?”down casting his face, he mumbled something too low for you to hear. The stranger you saw as a friend, a saviour, laid down on the grass, once again dressed in a thin shirt, muscles pressing against the fabric for you to see. 

“I didn't want to..”frustration filled you, furrowed your eyebrows while your heart hurt. 

“Then why?”your anger melted right off when he looked at you, eyes and forehead on full display. Pain filled him too, pulled you into his grasp once again.   

“Because what if?”what if what? You wanted to ask, get the answer you thought you deserved but this boy only shook his head, turning to the stars so he could watch them with the eyes you wanted to feel.

“Do you believe in soulmates?”his voice was low, disappearing high in the sky as you tuned out the world in favour of hearing him, in favour of wondering about his words. Soulmates? No, you didn't believe in them because how you could you? When you always were left to stare at others and never feel the bond of only being someones and them being yours.”Well I do...I think it’s written in the stars..”

And he looked at you, straight through every layer you had, deep within your soul as the whole path you should walk stayed clear in his orbs. It wasn't written in the stars, it was written in his eyes. He was pulling you in with every breath, made you want to believe because how could you not want him? The stranger with no name but a familiar feeling to his smile.

“Do you think I’m yours?”you could hear how bitter you sounded, feet standing on the ground while you felt like you were flying. He was taller than you but the warmth in his eyes never let you feel scared. 

“I know…”he was good at stealing your breath, good at make your aching heart feel like it was whole, good at luring you in with every gaze. He had spoke about the stars like they were his home but looked at you like you hung them where they were.”I know that you are mine as well as I’m yours because of what I am…”

Now were you confused. What he was? Human, with features soft as wind and the pull of the moon when he became your night. And you? Someone who felt like the world was wrong and only right when he stood by you. 

“I’m a werewolf...Something from your stories but real..”you could say nothing, just watch as eyes turned sad and mouth tight lipped.”You were supposed to be mine and I’m yours, I knew it from the second I saw you..But I was scared of what you would think, so I left, went home to my pack where I felt awful..”

“There are more of you?”thoughts swirled in your head, made it hard to pull out the important parts. 

“There are..13 to be exact..”a smile graced his face, broke that tense hard edge to his eyes for a second, brought back the warm feeling on your skin.”They are loud but they are my family...yours too if you want..”

Every rational part of your brain told you that this was crazy, that he crazy, but he didn't feel like he was lying. He felt so sincere, so scared when he added the last words, and what did you have at home? The empty feeling of staring at the ceiling alone in the dark?

“I don't even know your name…”that sheepish look came back as you realized that you had brushed over the important detail.

“..It’s Seungcheol…”

“Well Seungcheol I’m Y/n and I hope the stars are right..”he beamed as you said his name, hair standing by his nape when you kept speaking.”Because I want to see what they wrote..”

[is-it-madness]

My Glorious Purpose | Loki x OC Chapter 6

A/N: I’m so in love with the mood board for this story! Thank you @wowjeena​ for helping me with it and for being an amazing beta! Love you, darling! 💜😘

Pairing: Loki x OC  (Tera Digitalis)

Word Count: 3.7k+

Warnings: Touching without consent

Chapter 6: Mission

(Tera’s POV)

Three months have passed by. Tony and Pepper rebuilt Stark Tower from the inside. Tony made sure that every Avenger has their own floor if they ever happen to stay over—Nat and Clint already rearranged their rooms to suit their style. They had come back about a week after they had vanished. Everything is back to normal after Loki’s attempted invasion failed. I still have a light mark from where I was cut on my forehead, other than that, everything is great. Tony designed my room, but unlike Clint and Nat, I kept the original layout and decor. I don’t really have that many possessions to decorate with. When Fury had dropped off a backpack that contained all my stuff, Tony freaked.

“Hey! Where’s this bag from kid? It has your name on it.”

I walk over to where Tony is standing. There’s a backpack next to the elevator and sure enough, my name is on it. I pick it up and unzip it.

“Oh! This is my stuff. Fury must’ve finally had time to clear out my room on the ship,” I tell Tony.

He looks at the bag, then at me, then back down to the bag.

“So-o-o, when is he going to bring the rest of your stuff over?”

“This is all my stuff Tony,” I laugh while shaking my head.

He takes the bag from my hands.

“Hey!”

He starts to ruffle around inside.

“Wait, wait. So you’re telling me all you own is three shirts and two pairs of pants?!”

“Not true!” I retaliate.

“Oh excuse me, so rude of me to forget about your toiletries,” he says sarcastically.

“Yeah, so?” I rip my belongings out of his grasp.

“Okay. JARVIS.”

“Yes, Mr. Stark?”

“Remind me to ask Ms. Potts to take the kid shopping later.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Tony! You really don’t need to do that! I’m absolutely fine with what I have!”

“Look kid. You might be okay living like this, but I’m not. You are a teenager! You should have more shoes that you can count! Jeans, shorts, t-shirts, sweaters, dresses, pajamas!. Not some S.H.I.E.L.D. authorized uniforms! And I’m not going to keep arguing with you about this! End of discussion.”

I huff in frustration. “Fine.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I look into my huge walk-in closet that Tony had built for me. I’ve been able to fill a rack after Ms. Potts had taken me shopping. I honestly don’t mind having a few items. I’ve lived so long with so little, that I’m used to not owning as many things as most girls my age would.

I quickly change into some workout clothes we bought and head down to the training room. Nat is already down there meditating, and I join her. We sit there for about ten minutes before we start to stretch.

“You ready to continue your training?” she asks me.

I nod at her enthusiastically. She had begun to train me in karate before Loki came to Earth.

“Okay, so I decided that today, we are going to start incorporating weapons into your techniques.”

She walks to the cabinet where we store all our practice weapons, and pulls out a staff that’s roughly her height. She reaches in again and pulls out another one that is smaller by several inches and hands it to me.

“Now, when you work with a staff, you need one about your height. That makes it easier to work with. And since you’re so short, you get the smallest staff.”

“Hey! Just because I’m five inches shorter than you does NOT mean I’m short!”

It’s the whole “kid” fiasco all over again. 

Nat just laughs. “Yeah, because being 5’2” isn’t short at all. Not in the slightest.”

“Whatever. Can we just start already?”

“Okay, first, we’ll begin with learning how to do a basic spin.”

She begins spinning her staff with both her hands, then switching between hands. I begin to bounce on my heels. I can’t wait; it looks so cool. When she’s done showing off, she stands in front of me.

“Now the first thing you want to do is place your left foot in front of you and extend your left hand while holding your staff. Make sure your hand is in the middle of the staff. Good. Next place your right hand on your chest, just to move it out of your way, for the time being.”

I complied.

“Okay now follow what I do.”

She begins to turn the staff in front of her, then bringing it towards her back.

“See how I’m leading the staff with my thumb? It’s directing the staff where I want it to go.”

We practice that move for a few minutes before turning to use our right hand. After we do that, it starts to get a little tricky. Nat tells me to reverse the way I am turning my staff, so that I start with my palm downward instead of up. It takes me several tries and a few hits to my arm before I finally catch on.

“Not bad. Now let’s try incorporating both hands.”

I watch Nat do it first before I give myself any more bruises. She starts slowly, with her left hand, turning the staff in front of her. When she reaches the right side of her body, she places her right hand behind her left, and turns it back towards the left side of her. She starts speeding up and taking steps as she twirls her staff. It’s a beautifully deadly sight. I start mimicking her movement and soon we were side by side, furiously spinning our staffs in front of us, dancing around each other. Lethal, dangerous, a force to be reckoned with. And I love it.

After practicing for a few hours, I head upstairs to take a shower. Tony had built an en suite in everyone’s rooms. At first, I thought it was a bit much, but I had admittedly grown to love it. When I finish showering and changing into regular clothes, I make my way to the kitchen for food. I take out some ice cream, milk, and frozen strawberries and dump them into a blender. Nat walks in when I’m adding the bananas.

“Mmmm. Make me a cup too.”

“I don’t know if I should,” I respond teasingly. “After all, I seem to recall a certain redhead making fun of my height.”

“Please кроли!” she pouts.

“Okay, fine, fine.”

I blend the smoothie together and pour us each a cup.

We’re making small talk, when her phone buzzes. She picks it up and reads the message. She smiles and looks at me.

“What’s up Nat?”

“Clint and I have another mission tonight.”

“Another one?” I ask nonchalantly, trying to not sound whiny. You just came back from one two days ago! I think to myself.

She must’ve seen the disappointment on my face, however, because she says, “Don’t worry, it’s only for tonight.”

“Good. Otherwise I would have had to practice spinning a staff with Tony.”

Nat laughs at that. When we finish our smoothies, Nat leaves to look for Clint to fill him in on the mission they received. I head out on my own, roaming the tower. I could join Tony and Bruce in the lab, since I’ve been acting as peacemaker since we first settled in. Tony gets a kick out of trying to get Bruce to hulk out. We haven’t had an accident yet, but with Tony around, who knows when Bruce will reach the end of his tether. But I just don’t want to deal with that headache right now. After Tony had finished rebuilding the tower, and whenever Clint and Nat are gone, I go exploring. It’s unbelievable how many rooms the tower has. Lately I stopped exploring because I found a library. It’s magnificent. Rows of shelves that reach the ceiling are stacked with books. The room is circular, so that you can’t see the other end of the room when you enter, just books. It’s kinda like a maze, with all the shelves curving to fit the shape of the room. Someone else could be in here and you would never know. Thankfully Tony took my advice when building this room. He added a mini kitchen, several sofas and armchairs, and a huge fireplace, that I requested. I go to my favorite sofa and grab the book I’ve been reading. 

I read for several hours before I hear JARVIS speak to me. 

“Miss Tera, Miss Romanoff has asked me to inform you that she is looking for you. She is currently in your room.”

“Okay, thanks JARVIS.”

I jog to the elevator and head up to mine and Nat’s floor. I enter my room to see Nat wearing a black cocktail dress with red accents and black heels. Clint is there too and wearing a suit.

“Hey Nat. JARVIS said you were looking for me?”

“Yeah, why aren’t you dressed yet?!”

“For what?”

“Oh shit, did I forget to tell you? You’re coming with us on our mission.”

“Really? Seriously?”

“Yeah, c’mon, get ready. Here’s your dress,” she says, gesturing to my bed.

I take one look at it.

“Wait, what is it that I’ll be doing exactly?” I ask anxiously.

Clint answers, “Don’t worry, you’re backup. Which means you get to sit with me and let Nat do everything.”

“Well if I’m just backup, why do I need this dress?”

“Cause we're going to a party,” Nat tells me.

Nat has to force me out of my hoodie and jeans and into the dress. She threatened to make me workout with Tony. I changed real fast when she said that. When I finish, I slip into the heels that Nat set aside for me. Clint then sat me down in front of my mirror and did my makeup while Nat worked on my hair.

I’m glad when we went to the garage no one saw me in my dress. I manage to avoid everyone. Except for Nat and Clint of course. Now don’t get me wrong. I like the dress. I really like it, in fact. But I struggle with accepting my appearance, not to mention self-esteem. I don’t like anything about any of my features, my insecurities always consume my every waking minute. And this dress is a little revealing. I feel exposed in the lace sleeves, knee length skirt, and low neckline. Plus with the black and gold heels? It’s a nice outfit, just not for me. 

As we drive to the hotel, where the party is at, I admire my smokey makeup look Clint did. I never would have guessed that a skilled archer would know how to apply eye shadow.

“So what are we dealing with Nat?”

She turns to face me from the front. Next to her, driving, is Clint.

“We’re dealing with a major illegal arms dealer named James Foyer. He’s made millions selling illegal weapons to the worst kind of people imaginable.”

“I’m guessing you’re gonna flirt with him to get him to tell you who his buyers are?”

She winks. “Exactly.”

I run my hands through my long, brunette hair. “So what’s he celebrating?”

“I don’t think he needs a reason to celebrate. Just wants to show the world he’s got money—and lots of it,” Clint says.

A few minutes later, we pull up in front of a huge hotel. We step out of the Ferrari and Clint gives the keys to the valet.

“Not a scratch.”

Nat and I hold on to Clint’s arm, on either side of him.

“Earpieces in?”

“Check,” we tell him.

“Alright then Nat, off you go.”

She slips away from us and heads through the crowd, keeping an eye out for our target. Clint heads toward the stairs, and I make my way to the back of the party, smiling, keeping watch.

“Target located Nat. He’s coming out of the elevator.”

Of course Clint would see him first, looking for his prey from above.

“Heading that way now,” Nat reports back.

I turn towards the elevator, where a tall, skinny, dark haired man is exiting. He has a cigar dangling from his lips and is wearing an expensive looking suit. As soon as he steps out of the elevator, hordes of women try to come near him, to touch him, to claim him as their own. He gives each of them attention, but he grows bored of them and moves on to the next set of breasts he sees.

“Disgusting,” I want to look away, but I can’t. I’m Nat’s backup. If something happens to her, I have to jump in and take her spot. I see James’ eyes latch on to Nat and her body. I shake my head. No decent man can look at Nat without looking down every few seconds. But she takes it, she starts chatting with him, laughing flirtatiously, placing her hand on his arm. It seems to be working. I figure Nat would get him to crack in the next ten minutes. I start to notice something wrong. Foyer is getting bored of her. I’ve never seen a man become bored so quickly when Natasha Romanoff is around. He begins scanning the crowd, looking for another female to interest him, when his eyes land on me. I’m about to bolt out of the hotel, when I hear Clint.

“Wait! Stay there. Nat’s losing him, so you might have to go in. Act interested in him.”

I do as Clint says and flash a smile at Foyer. He immediately begins to make his way towards me.

Through my clenched smile, I tell Clint, “I don’t think I can do this! Nat hasn’t trained me in this yet!”

“Don’t worry Tera, you can do this. Just make him think you’re into him. Flirt. Laugh. Play dumb.”

“But Clint-”

“This is my sister Savannah. Savannah, this is Mr. James Foyer.”

“There you are Cleo!” I say to Nat. “I’ve been looking for you!” I turn to face the man. “It’s lovely to meet you Mr. Foyer.”

I extend my hand to shake, but he takes it and brings it to his lips.

“Please, call me James.”

I smile back at him, trying to restrain my look of disgust.

“Cleo, why didn’t you tell me your sister is a doll?”

Nat laughs and says, “You think every new girl you meet is a doll.”

I find myself very relieved that Nat and I came up with fake names for each other. I suddenly notice Nat tapping her thigh. It isn’t out of nervousness, rather, it’s a code—Morse code.

Not me, he wants you.

I groan internally after I decode her message. Of course the only person to ever find me attractive is a sleazeball.

Okay. I tap back. I have to do this, this is why I’m here, for backup. Also because I don’t think Clint would be able to seduce Foyer.

At my response, Nat makes up an excuse to leave, leaving me with Foyer.

“I don’t believe you two are sisters,” he says evenly.

I raise an eyebrow. KEEP CALM!

“Really?”

He takes a step closer to me and takes my face in his hand. It takes all I have to not bite his hand.

“No. You’re much more… appealing,” he says, eyes darting towards my body, lingering in places that make me want to put him in a choke hold. 

DON’T SLAP HIM, DO NOT SLAP HIM! THINK OF THE MISSION! THINK. OF. THE. MISSION.

“You’re not like other girls,” he continues. 

“How so?” I ask, in what I hope is a seductive voice, batting my lashes at him.

He drops his hand and chuckles. “As soon as I entered the room, they all threw themselves at me. You didn’t. I like women who play hard to get.” He suddenly grabs my waist and pulls me flush against him, now whispering in my ear. “Cause once I get them, they taste the sweetest,” I feel him place a soft kiss on my neck, lingering before pulling away.

I see Clint aiming his gun from the balcony and Nat pulling out her knives. They heard what he said and saw what he did. I place my arms around Foyer’s neck, making a shooing motion with my hand to tell them to stand down. I smile at the man in front of me, an idea forming.

“If we taste the sweetest, what do you taste like?”

He smiles an even larger one and leans forward, attempting to kiss me. I put a finger to his lips and a hand to his chest, holding him back. I might have to seduce him, but I refuse to let my first kiss be with this sexist.

“Why don’t we go somewhere a little more private?” I whisper, trailing my fingers down his chest, stopping at his belt.

He takes my hand and heads towards the elevator. He pushes the button for the third floor and as soon as the doors close, he tries kissing me again and again I place a finger to his lips.

“I don’t give kisses very easily, so if you want one, you must do as I say. Understand?”

He places both his hands on my waist. Never have I felt so violated in my life, but I hold back all my anger and emotions. 

I can’t back out of his iron-like grasp. He bends over to whisper into my ear again. “But you taste divine babe.” He places his lips at the base of my neck and I begin to feel him trail his tongue upward towards my jaw.

“So good,” I hear him whisper, before he catches my earlobe between his teeth, tugging gently.

Correction. NOW I have never been more violated. I grab his tie. I momentarily think about how if I choked him here and now, no one would know. Unfortunately though, we need that information from him, otherwise I would have to explain to Fury why the only man that can give us the information is dead. I quickly begin to care less about the mission and more about my own dignity, but before I can tighten the tie and choke the life out of him, the doors open to the third floor. Foyer removes his lips from my skin, takes my hand and leads me to his door. I look at the number, memorizing it for later. Foyer opens the door and pulls me inside. He tries kissing me a third time and again I stop him with a finger.

“You had your fun in the elevator,” I tell him. “Now it's my turn.”

He bits his lower lip and I see the lust in his eyes, but thankfully, he doesn’t argue.

Thank god!

I push him into a chair by the dresser, and I reach inside my clutch that I brought with me and pull out a pair of handcuffs.

I dangle them in front of him. 

“You brought cuffs with you?” he asks, unbuttoning his shirt.

I wink, “I thought I might get lucky tonight. Turns out I did.”

I cuff his hands and attach them to the chair, so not only is he cuffed, he also can’t walk around without the chair dragging with him.

I take his tie off. 

“Open.”

He opens his mouth immediately and I tie the cloth around his mouth forming a gag.

“Good. Now you wait here, and I’ll be back with a surprise for you.” I whisper in his ear, with a hand on his chest. I turn and head into the bathroom. I wink at him before closing the door.

I whip out my phone and text Nat.

Nat I got him. He’s cuffed and gagged. 

Hurry, call Fury quick. 

I only have a few minutes before he gets suspicious.

Where are you?

Third floor.

Room 394

This isn't a joke. Please hurry.

There‘s no response and it’s quiet for two minutes before I hear a loud thud. Probably Fury. I hear someone loading a gun.

“Where is she!?!”

I walk out of the bathroom.

“Hey sis,” I say.

I see Clint holding a loaded gun pointed at Foyer’s head, Nat with her widow’s bite charged up and ready to pounce, and the door laying on the ground. Yup. It was Fury.

“Alright boys, tie him up. Nice work you three. You’re done for the night, go and head on home.”

“Thanks, Director.”

“Don’t forget to turn your report into me. Otherwise I’ll put you on desk duty.”

“Yes sir,” we all say.

We turn to leave but I think of something

I walk back to Foyer. “Did you like my surprise?”

 He glares and growls through the gag.

I feign shock. “You didn’t?! Well I have some advice for you. Never touch a lady without her consent, otherwise they’ll bring hell down on you.” I smile and walk out of the room with Nat and Clint by my side.

As we walk through the lobby, S.H.I.E.L.D agents run past us, up the stairs and into the elevator. 

“You did amazing Tera. I’m so proud of you!”

I smile at the praise. “Thanks Nat.” I pause before asking, “Do you have any wipes? I feel contaminated.”

She smiles at me. “I always have some during my missions. They’re in the car. C’mon.”

When we walk out of the hotel, our Ferrari is parked right up front. We get in and Clint takes off, back towards Stark Tower. 

“Here you go.”

Nat passes me a pack of wet wipes. I immediately pull out three and begin scrubbing my hands and neck. I start telling them exactly what happened, not leaving out a single detail. I’m telling them how I was able to gag and cuff him, when Nat gets a call on her phone. She answers and puts it on speaker.

“Hey Tony. What’s up?”

“Sorry Nat, I know you guys are on your mission, but something came up.”

“Don’t worry, we finished. We’re on our way home right now.”

“Good, because I need you three here now.”

“Is that Lady Natasha?” We hear a voice ask in the background. “I wish to speak with her as well!”

The three of us look at each other.

“Tony?” I ask. “Is that Thor?”

“Lady Tera! You are in this device as well? Splendid!”

“No, wait Thor! That button hangs-”

The line goes dead. I laugh at the thought of Thor and Tony wrestling with the phone.

“I wonder why Thor is back?” Clint wonders aloud. 

Clint pulls into the garage of the tower and we make our way towards the elevator.

“At least we have another member on the team,” I say as we head up.

Part 7

[splinterapollo]

Flint “Splinter” Apollo

NAME: Flint “Splinter” Apollo GOES BY: Splint, Splinter, Apollo AGE: 34 BIRTHDAY: October 2nd GENDER: Male || Cis ORIENTATION: Hetero. ROLE: Outlander || Ranger OCCUPATION: Arrowsmith Nanotech Tinkerer.

If you ever hear whistling… duck. No? Not fast enough? Then just fucking move. Three inches seems harmless – a waste even? You know how deep you need to penetrate a chest cavity before you puncture the most used organ in the body? Three inches. Even then, that’s a hell of an arrow… consider the force of it travelling at speed… by the time you’ve thought about it, you’re bleeding out and you can’t breath…

Splinter’s are harmless most of the time, this one, isn’t.

So if you hear whistling, move.

And if you’re still breathing; it was never meant for you. Because it never misses. So there’s no actual need for those three inches, irreversible damage can be made with just one. Then picture five more of those arrows piercing flesh in rapid succession – get the picture?

Move out the way, these Splinter’s kill.

Every breath matters: inhale, exhale, steady the heart – draw, hold, release. The sound produced, unforgettable; distinct in the way it cuts through air, travels with precision and speed that ends in an entirely difference place to where it began. Lands in the face of the target, buried in wood and shavings peel away to make room for the forced arrow. Flint’s watched his father perform such a ritual for years, knows he’s close by just by the whistling, a noise never quite silenced no matter how good the archer.

But it always lands. And the whistling stops.

Flint’s childhood is foggy; snippets he can’t quite grip hold of to form vivid memories, but he remembers arrows like they were only thing that made sense. He knows his mother worked with the Council; a high ranking researcher in amongst the scientists, nanotechnology a specialism that Flint stared at from a distance – the way she spoke about it like it could have been the cure for everything; like nothing would ever be a problem; health; medicine; life would be so prosperous with this miniscule technology crafted by smart hands and reserved for only those with clearance.

Where he filled in empty spots in his mind about his mother – grew to learn about her work, his father; an ardent smith for the sentinels in the Council’s ranks taught Flint everything there was to know about being a ranger, at least, about the skill required. The training, that was all beneath the noses of those who might disapprove of a youth fletching and carving arrows to be used outside the barracks.

From that. Draw, hold, release comes after. And Flint’s gifted with it. An archer’s paradox the start of how Flint Apollo does it differently.

Not all mothers have technology that when manipulated correctly, can be just as lethal as it is helpful. It’s evident from the first interest he takes in it, she knows the Council won’t approve of the man’s ideas; theories that maybe he can craft arrowheads from the nanotech – imagine the potential for that… how damaging, how that slight occasional paradox never has to affect an archer again.

His mother put it down to grief; a state of guilt – because two years prior to that, Jax Apollo, Flint’s father lost his life the same way he lived it.

With a whistle in his ears.

Only, Flint’s the one who fired it; an accident, a great shot, but fatal. That’s how Flint knows how easy it is to puncture the heart. How he’s thrown so deep into the end of the pool, that swimming without a life raft and instead a bow in hand isn’t going to save anyone. But nanotech could. And his mother in her own grief – her love for her son that pushed through the shock; trauma of the accident off site, kept so secret as to not endanger Flint’s life – potential to be in the serving ranks if it ever came to light that he watched his father bleed out whilst he clenched the cause like it would save him

“Just imagine if medics could heal from a distance – if they had an eye like I could, the damage could be reversed, an arrow fired –”

“Flint, stop. That’s enough. You’ve done enough already, take yourself out and put a splinter elsewhere, nanotechnology will save lives, but not in the way you want it to… you’ll make a weapon of it…”

And he did.

Tera doesn’t welcome it; stares bug-eyed at the mere concept that there’s two sides to everything; both sides of the arrowhead are sharp and deadly and in the coming days that Flint spirals, theorises what he knows of nanotechnology from his mother, she begins to question whether the accident all those years ago was as straightforward as that. If there’s something darker; more obsessive at play. The young Apollo always meant well, anyone who asks would say he’s arrogant – does it with a grin, but emanates a warmth that’s somehow modest to the skill in his hands when the extension of his being in placed within them; when he gets to make a whistle.

He doesn’t know if he’s the cause, if The Council played a part in the end days of his adult life on Tera or if something else factored into the downfall of one of the most renowned researchers on the planet; one of the most specialised woman in nanotechnology, but the death of his mother – draw, hold, release. How a man like Flint copes when all he’s once known is revoked, he doesn’t know the details, only knows that there’s delirium before her vanishing; reported dead by those in the laboratories halls and yet, doesn’t quite believe it.

And Tera doesn’t have the answers; won’t give him any when he presses. Holds an arrow to their throats and demands it hopelessly. Like everything they’re great at hiding, they’re not kind. 

So before the Council have a chance to neutralise the last of the Apollo’s; the gifted archer, nanotechnology tinkerer, he gets out. Leaves behind any legacy that might have come from parents with a purpose and follows his own to the other side of the Blood Wood; to the Outlands. A home that’s beyond, welcoming of his ideas – though he won’t admit them all upfront, doesn’t invoke the fear in the eyes of the Outlanders that the Terran’s once had for his spieling.

He wants answers; needs to know what is beneath the surface of the Council’s front and why his mother’s death was brushed beneath the carpet like she was simply expendable. Flint’s kept up with his mother’s words: he’ll put splinters elsewhere, the nickname given and part of the memory he has of her. Keeps it with the fear that it might someday become foggy like the rest of them. He’ll stand against everything his parents believed in for them; show them that his tinkering, his archery ability and dangerously skilled actions with that isn’t forgotten; a mistake to make an enemy of.

So careful when you hear that whistle, you might just get a splinter.

Connections || Family 

Jax Apollo || Father, deceased. Lora Apollo || Mother, deceased 

Connections || Misc.

The Acosta’s | Splinter knows the Acosta’s through connections within Tera, Iliana’s husband always being the primary friend in Splinter’s life and part of the reason he’s not allowing the death of his mother to be taken at face value. They were considered comrades and had similar ideologies in battle tactics/sentinel views despite Splinter being somewhat obsessive over the combination of nanotechnology into his craft. He knows Iliana well and remains vigilant about the way both his former best friend and his mother both died in the same bracket within the Terran walls. Splinter and Iliana have a good relationship, albeit, unorthodox and slightly chaotic.

Sev3n | Splinter’s mother worked closely and reported to Sev3n as part of the nanotechnology department within Tera, in turn, Flint knows of them and has greatened his nanotech knowledge through the way it’s been passed down to the researchers within the nano field; but Lora Apollo is the primary connection for this, Flint being secondary.  

Further Depth

Flint goes by Splinter due to both his mother’s sideways nickname and his affinity for archery. But Splint, or Apollo works just the same. Flint is reserved for those who’ve known him for a length of time – from Tera most likely.

Nine times out of ten, he’s equipped with his gear – spends a good portion of everyday training and/or working on the limited, worn nanotechnology he swiped from his time in Tera. It’s not common to civilians so much he does the latter.

Tinkers a hell of a lot though – tries to develop a method to both use the nanotechnology as a healing method when fired on/in an arrow from a distance as well as weaponizing it for just the same kind of thing… but with more ouch and BOOM.

 Sometimes, he’s funny.

Other times, he might leave someone with a splinter with no guilt for doing it.

There’s a distinct pattern of lines along his collarbone that resemble arrow punctures – he doesn’t talk about it, don’t ask but it relates to a former injury when making his first arrowheads with his father as a young child.

Is an arrowsmith in the Outlands and forges some specialty arrowheads that have a wild case of acting the hell up.

He’ll tell you straight up, he doesn’t miss a shot.

So don’t argue it, not worth the hassle. Boost his ego and move on, it’s safer for everyone.

 P H I L A N D E R E R

Dedicated to the Outlanders and believes they are fighting for a more just cause than the place he was raised in.

[pls lmk if you want connections, we can talk]

[vinylexams]

Heavy Heavy Low Low - Courtside Seats to the Greatest Fuck of All Time⁠

⁠ @heavyheavylowlow38 #heavyheavylowlow #hhll #deathwish @deathwishinc⁠ ⁠ I’ve been lucky as hell recently to snag insider info on some killer reissues and this one is no exception. You all already know how much I love HHLL, especially Turtle Nipple…, and through serendipity I got connected with Robbie from the band a few months back. I got to hear about how they are coming back to life after some years focusing on other projects, growing up and growing out, and evolving as musicians and artists in the process. They’ve worked with Twelve Gauge Records to put Courtside Seats on vinyl for the very first time and after they announced it on their platforms and immediately sold it out, they’re pressing another batch that you and the HHLL lovers in your life can and should snag before that pressing sells out, too!⁠ ⁠ What’s even more exciting is that I got to pick Robbie’s brain in typical VE fashion and he’s indulged me with all sorts of info about what they’re up to, whether or not we can expect new music, and some feel-good stories about huffing air duster and ripping shit up in an old warehouse on the California coast. Here it is in its unedited glory, but first…head to the website to pre-order your copy and then head to Robbie’s Indiegogo campaign to learn more about his upcoming short firm that’s scored by Nick from Tera Melos! ⁠https://deathwishinc.com/products/heavy-heavy-low-low-courtside-seats https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/morning-deliveries-short-film#/

INTERVIEW

First and foremost, it’s been a minute since we’ve heard from Heavy Heavy Low Low and then out of nowhere you sprang back to life in 2019. What motivated you all to pick up this project again? I’m not sure what motivated it. We had always been trying to jumpstart the whole thing again for some time and I think that it might have been a case of everyone’s lives slowing down and examining that time with a weird reverence. I can only speak for myself. The boys are all in school or doing their own thing.

I imagine you’ve all been working on different projects since HHLL went on hiatus. Do you have anything that you or the rest of the band have worked on that you’d love us to know about? Danny has gotten pretty popular in the Kendama world. Chris is studying various forms of martial arts. Roo is endlessly going to school and currently scoring independent films. Chip is heavily involved in competitive fishing. I’ve been making short films when the situation and my wallet allow it. We’re all crazy excited about finally owning Courtside Seats on vinyl for the first time. Aside from bringing that album onto the vinyl medium, the pre-order page notes that there’s new artwork, too. What can we expect from that? When we made the CD we weren’t expecting to sell any really.. I did the art and Matthew printed them all at his job. Him and I folded every crease, glued the o-cards and vacuum sealed them all. I think it sold out almost completely at the record release show. We made the same amount of records as we did the original cd (500). The artwork for the original CD pressing was done on sketch paper without any comprehension of what could be done with drawn art and a scanner. Matthew was the computer wizard and back then, young and silly, it was all done on the cuff. The new art is a bit more modern and plays with mortality. Court-side Seats to The Greatest Fuck of All Time being a front seat view of a an ordinary, bumpy ride through life. I’m proud of it. What’s it like to bring back an album from the earliest parts of the band’s career? Do you still identify with the music? It is odd. It was a truly surreal time and place. We were out of our fucking minds. We recorded it in Mountain View, Ca in this giant warehouse that tapered into gutted office spaces. It was a weird white collar tomb on the outskirts of Silicon Valley right before the real tech boom. In the big part of the warehouse where we’d enter there were giant mounds of clothes meant to be donated to some third world country. We’d burrow tunnels in them and do huge dramatic flips from pike to pile. There was an aisle of outdated medical equipment waiting to be sent that we’d stalk through in the dark. It was a strangely magic place. Once you got through the warehouse you’d get to these office stations that had been fashioned into recording studios and that’s where we birthed this thing. We were so misguided. The amount of compressed air that we inhaled should have killed us. I contribute a significant drop in IQ to that shit. Smoking copious amounts of weed from gravity bongs. Recording with a hip hop producer, Deegan. Never a disagreement. It still feels like it was some strange purgatory of youth. I don’t miss it, but it was beautiful. Does this mean there’s hope of having Everything’s Watched, Everyone’s Watching on vinyl sometime, too? So, there was a guy who was very adamant about putting that record out on vinyl. We had a dialogue going for the better part of a year and apparently he had been in contact with Rhino Music and Warner, the two companies that hold the licensing to that album. He had received word that it’d cost an impressive amount of money, but he still wanted to shoulder it. Mind you, this dude didn’t have a label, he just wanted to put this thing out and apparently hadnt thought that all out. Time goes by, I’m waiting, not worrying one way or the other. One day I get a link from a friend, a Christian college website detailing that dude had been arrested for kidnapping and assault. Very sad situation. Dude seemed semi normal. Anyway, that was the last effort I’d seen put into that. I’d love to contribute new art to that release if any go-getter wants to try their luck. I’ve loved everything HHLL put out, but Turtle Nipple is in my top 10 list of favorite albums of all time. What was the writing the recording process for it like and how did the band feel about the new creative directions on it? EWEW was half previously recorded material re-recorded and half material written a year prior, kind of forced into a studio with producers we had no previous rapport with. Those producers/engineers were incredible human beings (RIP Tom Pfaffle! See you in the mindfog) but we were very young punk kids thrown into a foreign land where we had our agents visiting and there were platinum records on the wall and it was a total barrage of privilege and excess. It was beautiful, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t feel soul in that record. Turtle Nipple is a dense trip through time and the record I’m most proud of in our discography. I don’t remember how long we had to record it, I do remember that it was the only time we’d been given to experiment and layer our sensibilities in an environment that catered to them. Sam (Pura) was a perfect conduit to that vibe and time and space and it really came out just how it should have. I think about that album as a 70s exploitation directors filmography.. it veers violently from genre to genre and while most of the stories are fiction and far from personal testimony, theirs a peek into some shared insanity contained throughout. George Cosmatos wandering through a punk club on an edible. I think that that album is our bands true personality. Sam is a member of our band whether he’s playing with us or engineering for us. He gets us. I love the idea of an alternate reality where we had lasted a bit longer and did an album with Steve Albini. He’d probably hate us, but I love those ‘What If?’ Scenarios. I’ll ask the question EVERYONE has been asking so it’s on the record somewhere: Does this mean we can expect new material or a new album soon? Maybe even a tour? We have a new EP in the works. We have some of it recorded with Sam. We’ve posted a couple clips on Instagram. We’re incredibly busy and spread out in our personal lives. Chip in TX, Dan in FL, Roo in OR, Rob and Chris in CA. Adulthood is a bitter, pulpy drink! We are going to be playing again. We won’t be leaving the West Coast. We had our fill of middle America and the travel involved. We have talked to some of our buds from our early days of touring about playing alongside (opening for) them for a limited run in 2020. I think that qualifies as a tour. Also, if anyone wants to fly us to Europe to play a festival in 2020, we’d like that. It’ll be an interesting year. How does it feel to be welcomed back by so many adoring fans who still love your music and are hoping for more after a long hiatus? It’s incredibly humbling. I have heard from people throughout the years about how we had affected them and it was always just strange to me. I’m pretty self deprecating, so I just don’t understand how some shit I wrote could mean much to anyone. My mind is just a shotgun blast of panic. I guess all of ours are? I love my band mates and their talents, though. So I understand the sorta sirens draw to the greater extent. I think they only got to show themselves slightly, too. Weird existence. Give us a piece of band trivia you’ve never shared in an interview before! Gees. There is a step-in part to most 15 passenger vans. It is a black, hard plastic. It meets with where you close the sliding door. When we had no bottles to pee in, we would just piss in ‘the step’. This thing was a den of germicidal activity. Trash and piss I don’t think we ever truly cleaned that thing. What’s odd is that we so rarely got ill on tour. The Step kept us healthy on a steady diet of trash and piss and general scum. Finally, this isn’t a question but the hidden track on Turtle Nipple is a fucking masterpiece and I wanted you to know. Thank you! I think that may have been my idea to add some weird 70s funk into an old track of ours. I think it turned out cool, but I think it betrays our vibe on that album! I wish it’d have devolved into some weird, primitive Altered States shit.

[thematildaeffect]

Caption: Tera and Christine (both smiling) at the East Bay Zine Fest, Dec 2017

An Interview With Christine Liu of Two Photon Art and The Stem Squad

In the cultural imagination, science and art are opposing fields, with no overlap in techniques or practitioner. But Christine Liu, a fourth-year graduate student studying neuroscience in the Lammel lab at UC Berkeley, is proof of just how wrong this stereotype is. Using techniques like optogenetics, which allows scientists to turn “on” and “off” genetically-modified neurons and ion channels with light, she studies how nicotine addiction changes the brain, probing what neural cell populations are responsible for the positive and negative feedback loops associated with nicotine. As accomplished outside of the lab as she is in it, Liu is the co-founder, along with Tera Johnson, of the Two Photon Art collective. The two make beautiful and informative zines about scientific topics ranging from volcanoes to prosopagnosia, or face blindness. Liu also created the social media collective, which currently boasts a Facebook group and Instagram page, “The Stem Squad,” a place for women working in, and interested in, STEM to come together, support each other, and connect with others in their field. Because of her prowess in science and art, Liu was a runner-up in the Search for Hidden Figures contest. Liu was kind enough to sit down with me, and talk to me about her work with the Two Photon Art Collective and The Stem Squad (questions and answers have been edited for clarity).

Soleil: Could you tell me a little bit about your background in science, and how you got interested in neuroscience specifically? Were you always sort of drawn to the field or did you come to it after a certain experience?

Christine: I started getting really into neuroscience my senior year of high school. People were trying to figure out what college they wanted to go to, what major they wanted to pursue, and I was always good at science but I never sort of saw myself as a scientist. I was gifted a few books by friends, one of which was the Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat by Oliver Sacks, as well as The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge. Usually, even today, I’ll read about 3/4ths of a book, and I just won’t be able to bring myself to finish it. For some reason, I’ll get bored of it. But these were two books that really stuck with me, especially the idea that our brain is involved in the control of our lives, and that missing even just a small chunk of it can alter a human’s ability to go through life the same way that others do. I ended up going to University of Oregon, which has a very robust neuroscience research core, and I was able to start doing neuroscience just a few months into my freshman year and I haven’t stopped since. I feel very lucky I was able to start doing research so early in a field I love. I just kind of stumbled upon it; it was never really a mission of mine. Even going to pursue my Ph.D. wasn’t really a mission either; it just seemed like the next logical step.

S: What does science-art means to you? What are you trying to accomplish with the art you do?

C: Fundamentally, art for me is something that takes the pressure off of other aspects of my life. Its something I really enjoy doing.  Even before I started Two Photons with Tera, I really enjoyed going home after a long day in lab and painting. My friend Tera, who I met doing a summer research program, and I do Two Photon Art together. It’s grown very organically based on who we are. We’re both women of color who do research and science, but didn’t always grow up being fed this (kind of) information. Science was never something I saw myself doing necessarily, which I think might be because I never had much access to this world until I became a part of it serendipitously. One of the main goals we have is to increase access to science, especially for people who don’t really identify with it. There’s this dichotomy that people often fall into that you’re either creative and artsy or you’re analytical and scientific, and oftentimes people put themselves into one box and forget to explore other sides of them. Sooner or later people forget they have that capability. So some of the work we try to do is to remind people you can be both, and you can be proud of both. We try to choose interesting topics that will reel people in who wouldn’t normally be interested, or might be intimidated by science. We make pins because of a slightly selfish motive. We were getting really active in a zine community full of artists and creative people who get to wear their passion on their sleeve. A lot of them screen print their own t-shirts, or wear enamel pins of stuff that they love. There wasn’t a lot (of enamel pins) for science, so we created them. Really, the fundamental thing is that we do the art for ourselves, but we’ve found a lot of opportunities along the way to make science a little more inclusive and welcoming to other people.

S: What was the first thing you guys created together?

C: It was the volcanoes zine, because we were in Nicaragua (together) where there are tons of volcanoes. We were hiking on volcanoes, and we were swimming in lakes with volcanic ash all over them, and we took the opportunity to be where we were and to try to disseminate the information we were learning a little more widely. We’ve grown a lot since then in terms of citing our sources, and formatting and illustration, so it’s kind of fun to look back at that one. We were just doing it for fun, and wanted to find a way to keep in touch with each other, and a driving force to hold us accountable in making art. We started it for fun, so we’ll stop doing it if it’s not fun anymore.

S: Could you tell me a little about how you started The Stem Squad, and what exactly you’ve done with it so far? How does one get involved with it?

C: So I’ll start with your last point, I would love for you to join the group. We have an Instagram page where we have the most followers, but most of the support we have occurs in the Facebook group, which has almost 800 members now. It started because I started to get more active on Instagram, with my personal account and with the Two Photon account, and I noticed that there were a handful of really expressive, honest, women in STEM who were telling the stories of their lives, and who were unafraid to embrace their femininity. I thought that was such a cool community that I really wanted to be a part of and foster connections with. We made a Facebook group, and people started inviting their own friends, and we made an Instagram page. With the Instagram page, we let people in the community take over for a week and post whatever they want about their work, their background, and it’s just grown exponentially over time. It’s really amazing. It's a very organic, pure kind of community. I don’t have to do anything to advertise it. It’s just grown from people who stumbled upon it and found that they really want to be apart of it, and there’s very little that I have to do in terms of administration to keep things caring and kind, because people in the group are so intrinsically nice and supportive and creative. I always feel weird when people give me credit for founding it, because all I did was name it and create a logo for it, but really it’s all the people inside it that do all of the work. Anyone can join, anyone who identifies as a woman, or a girl, or female in science and STEM, especially if they are interested in joining a caring community and providing resources for others as well.

S: I really like the way that you talk about it, it seems very caring, and the way you guys center care is very nice, especially since science is seen in some ways, I guess correctly, as kind of this one-man, often white, for themselves, hypercompetitive world. Community can be such an important starting point in so many things

C: Absolutely. I didn't realize how much I needed this community until I had it. It’s been really amazing seeing all the beautiful things that have come to fruition from this community. Tons of people meet up that found each other through the group. People who have started podcasts have found guests through the group, and everyone is really in there to support each other. It’s a community founded on support and collaboration, and there’s no place for competition at all. This is a place we want to be safe and free to talk about things that might be taboo to talk about elsewhere. This is just how women in STEM want to interact with each other; it’s full of love.

S: Are you working on anything in particular right now?

C: We are always working on like 3 things at a time. It’s actually pretty overwhelming because we have so many ideas, and we can’t wait to get them done, and sometimes people approach us with things we just can’t pass (up on). So one zine we are really close to being done with is a collaboration with an artist called Natelle Draws Stuff, and she does a lot of enamel pins and will donate some of the proceeds to conservation efforts. We are making a zine with her called “Same Difference”, which is about convergent and divergent evolution, and why we see so many kinds of animals that fly, but also why closely related animals have evolved different functions.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

If you want to learn more about Christine Liu and the art and science she does, check out her Twitter and her webpage. To learn more about her and Tera’s zine collective, check out Two Photon Art’s webpage and Patreon/Etsy.

[omfgthelife]

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Track: Ellie Goulding ✕ Bon Iver - Lights ✕ Calgary

Video Samples Source: Chaalbaaz - Tera Beemaar Mera Dil

TL;DR version: I'm pretending to make music. Somewhere in 2007-08, I got introduced to the idea of "internet mash-up artist" when a friend living in the US sent me a link to one of the first mash-up artists to go viral on the Internet, DJ ToToM. He mixed everything we were listening to then. It was fascinating to listen to something like Bob Dylan through the gaze of The Pixies. It's a different song, it's the same two songs but now it's different. It means something else now. Yeah, you can still be attached to each of the two (or more) songs that make the mashup as well. But it's just that they were made for each other also.

Since then, mashups have become a part of my library. Every now and then, I go looking for some new mashup artist who is utterly mindblowing when it comes to their matchmaking abilities. Others just make remixes, where they take an electronic sample beat and then speed up/slow down two tracks to match beat with that sample beat and play them on top of it. Or my nemesis: Bands who play two covers clearled stitched together one after the other. Yes, I'm a mashup hipster. A mashup is all about sampling. If you're doing anything other than sampling then you're making music (it may even be amazing) but you're not making a mashup. A mashup is about an alternative reality's pop culture (as defined by all alternative reality references/imagined in popular culture).

2010 onwards, mashups became my way of celebrating New Year's Eve. Two of the biggest viral mashup hitmakers Dj Earworm and Daniel Kim would release their own year-end specials -- a mashup of the Billboard top 50 tracks of the ear -- titled United States of Pop and Pop Danthology. (In my head, it's like the mashup boxing match of the year. I'm sure neither of the two artists think that way.) Then I compare notes between the two mashups. Who made the smoothest, coolest mashup with songs put together in the least forced way possible. All of this is dependent on my own judgement of course, not some standardized guide or musical knowledge. Every year, I've spent a couple of days on Audacity trying to see if I can mash songs together before realising I know shit about creating music and giving up. (I actually know nothing, I love listening to music though.) I tried reading hack guides and watching terrible videos about how to extract vocals from a song. (Hey, it never works for anything but the song they're demonstrating in the video.)

Somewhere in 2011, I discovered Girl Talk. He has taken ‘mashup artist’ to a whole new level. His mashup albums are a like a reflection in the entire genre that would be made of mashups and samples. In his discography, you'll find everything from banging dance numbers to just good soulful listens to sometimes even an exploration in noise. I'm not sure I'll ever go that deep into the art/craft of mashups. You must listen to at least one full Girl Talk album to know what I'm talking about.

Recently, I started following oneboredjeu on twitter, who I consider perhaps one of the finest mashup artists that lives on the Internet. I walked into her YouTube channel for the Gambino and Gorillaz mashups and stayed for everything else. Among her recent uploads, her Sia-Lorde and SZA-Ariana Grande mashups are to die for. Through her, I found Raheem D. His Lil Kim-Ariana Grande mashup is da bomb. That was when I also discovered there was a mashup artist scene and their own space on social media. Reading them discuss mashups, hearing their uploads, I learnt two key things which I used when I restarted my attempts at mashing songs on Audacity:

1. It's best if songs are on the same key and close to each other in BPM (beats per minute) count. Because I know shit about making music, I couldn't guess what key any given song was, and I could never count beats already. 2. You can't just cut vocals out of a song like it works with image editing (which I had learnt already). Mashup artists source their stems (different tracks that make a song: vocals, strings, percussion, or the complete instrumental backing track) from all over the Internet.

Finally, we're at how did I end up here. A few weeks ago, I was hanging out with a friend from Chile. Our usual scene was sitting on his couch, and having a YouTube party where we'd keep showing each other videos or music. That day, the moment I entered his house, he jumped up.

"Duude! Do you remember the Asereje song?" He was doing the step. "The Tomatina girls or something?" "Yes, yes! That one." "We just called it the Ketchup song in India." "That's not the point. Somebody finally figured out what the gibberish part of the song was!" "There was a gibberish part?" "The lines that come after Asereje are all gibberish!" "They're not Spanish? They sound so much like Spanish!" "Yes, they do but they're Spanish gibberish. If you understood Spanish, you'd know." "So what's the meaning of Asereje?"

He then played a video from a Chilean news channel where they were reporting that a dude on Twitter had cracked the Asereje code. So in Spanish, the girls are singing the story of Diego. One night Diego is wrecked on alcohol and drugs and arrives at a club. The DJ starts playing a song, which happens to be Diego's favourite song. Y la baila (And he dances), y la goza (and he enjoys it) y la caaantaaa (and he siiings): Aserejé, ja deje tejebe tude jebere Sebiunouba majabi an de bugui an de buididipí Sebiunouba majabi an de bugui an de buididipí Sebiunouba majabi an de bugui an de buididipí So Diego's favourite song iiiiis: I said a hip hop, hippie to the hippie The hip, hip a hop, and you don't stop, a rock it out Bubba to the bang bang boogie, boobie to the boogie To the rhythm of the boogie the beat

Rapper's Delight! Yes, that blew my mind and I can no longer take The Ketchup Song lightly. I have regrets for taking it lightly when I was in college and the song was a sensation.

So at this end of this long detour in my mashup story: I got home that night and tweeted, asking the Internet for a mashup of The Ketchup Song and Rapper's Delight. Someone from my twitter social life was equally mindblown and asked for the same. Something hit me then and I made this just ffs. I'd successfully managed to get vocals only tracks of Rapper's Delight and The Ketchup Song, and an instrumental version of The Ketchup Song to put together that short clip -- in my head, it was more of a proof of concept that I can mashup AND that the guy from Chile was right, Asereje IS Rapper's Delight. Last Monday, I got bored one evening and also was itching to see if I could get even close to making a mashup. So as usual, my mashup attempt of 2017 was underway. I googled to see if somebody had compiled a song keys database and ta-da: I found Audio Keychain. While just clicking through their database to see if any song strikes me in particular that I wanted to try using in a mashup. I found Katy B's 5AM, which I really like. A reverse search told me that Blue Oyster Cult's hit The Reaper had the same key and almost the same BPM. There it was decided, for my first attempt, I was going to mash these two songs together. I found the Katy B stems on some filesharing platform after some searching. A decent instrumental (backing track) version of The Reaper on YouTube was found much easily and downloaded. I worked for a couple of hours and made an almost 2-minute draft. It was working but I hit a creative block there onwards. So I exported the 1:48 clip to mp3 from Audacity and sent it to the friend who first introduced me to ToToM and went to sleep.

The next day at office, I played the mashup over and over again to see if still made sense. I made a colleague listen to it because I was confident that I had no distance and it would sound amazing to me. He said, "I haven't heard either of these songs but I like this song I'm hearing." That was hella encouraging. Although, I was sure that it was a fluke that I managed to make that one. If I try once again, I'll fail miserably. On Wednesday, I opened Audio Keychain and decided to try again. After some hits and misses, I finally ended up with Billy Idol's Dancing With Myself (backing track) and David Guetta/Nicki Minaj/Bebe Rexha's Hey Mama (vocal track). After the first draft, there were lots of empty spaces for which I didn't find any vocals that fit. So I added the chorus from Charli XCX's Boom Clap, which doesn't really fit as well as the first two songs with each other. But it was all sounding pleasant and I hadn't fucked up as miserably as the last seven years.

Thursday evening, I didn't even think twice. I got home, logged onto Audio Keychain and started looking for tracks to mashup. A lot of random and terrible experiments later, Ellie Goulding's Lights and Bon Iver's Calgary seemed like they had promise together. Unfortunately, just like the bad Charli XCX stem from the previous mashup, I found a below-par vocals only track for Lights. I didn't actually care because all I wanted to see was if I could make a decent mashup again. I really, really liked how the two tracks came together. Hence, this decision of publishing the mashup. I would've published on Thursday night itself but I think I was too happy about how these two tracks worked together. I felt this track needed a video. And in a vision due to a fuckton of sleeplessness, Sridevi and my favourite song from Chaalbaaz came to mind - Tera Beemaar Mera Dil. So then I downloaded the best available YouTube video for that song and started to work on it. After quite a few drafts, a low-end machine, where every render takes 2 hours and the only way to see the video is to render it because otherwise everything starts malfunctioning due to the load, here's the final mashup video for a mashup track.

[uilahsbooks]

Rock stars Group Interview! 

Hi guys! I'm really excited to have you all here, thank you for making the time for me, how are you guys doing today??   Lucy smiles. "We're great. Thanks for having us."

I'm really excited to just pick your brains a bit and just get to know your guys more on a personal level. So let's begin shall we?

How do you guys like having the kids around? Lucy and Jesse look at the others. Kennedy shrugs. "I do. They're entertaining."  Ethan nods. "They keep us on our toes, that's for sure."

Who is the baby whisperer in the group?  Jesse chuckles. "Xander, hands down. I don't know how he does it, but he can get the kids to behave or stop crying with just a few words." Jesse shakes his head.

Who do the kids gravitate to?  Lucy smirks. "Xander, again. Probably because he's so silly with them."  Xander grins. "Hell yes, I am."

Is Miss Kierah still using nana Russos mojo ??  Lucy frowns now. "No. Nana did something to suppress the mojo until she's old enough to use it properly… you know, not against her mother."  Jesse rubs Lucy's back.

What are the babies personalities like??  "Outgoing. They each have their own interests and mannerisms," Jesse answers.  Do they get along? "For the most part," Jesse begins, "Unless they're fighting over a toy or something. There is nothing fun about when they fight," Lucy shudders.  Out of the boys, who is the mama's boy??  "Konnor," Lucy begins. "Definitely Konnor. He's also the most sensitive out of them all."

Who spoils the kids the most? Everyone turns to Xander and at the same time says, "Xander."  Xander laughs.

Jace & Summer how is the wedding planning going ?  Summer groans. "Don't get me started. I've decided to just hand it over to Mama Russo since she guilts me into changing things to her liking, so she can just plan it all." Jace winces.

Is Kadi still dancing? "Yep. She's something else. I love that she takes after her mom in that sense. I can't imagine her ever not dancing," Jace replies.

Am I crazy or do all the kids names start with K? Aha.  They all look at each other. "Jesse and I kind of planned it that way," Lucy says. "Kadi was just an added bonus." Everyone mutters their agreement.

Cage and Sera how are you guys? "We're good," Sera replies.

I just have to know, are we expecting a Nichols baby any time soon?  Sera looks at Cage who looks at her. She smirks. "We're not rushing. If it happens, it happens. There's no timeline."

How's the married life treating you? Sera nudges Cage. "Good." Sera rolls her eyes. "Perfect. We're not just husband and wife, we're also best friends. I trust him with my life and I know he trusts me with his."

What are you guys favorite things to do?  "When we get time away from work and la Famiglia, we like to watch movies or read books. Something quiet and private with just the two of us," Sera answers.

Xander and Tera you guys are absolutely beautiful together. It's nice seeing Xander smile a real smile. What's going on with you guys?  "We're working it all out," Tera replies. "It's not going to be easy, but we'll get there."

Tera, how are you getting along with the other women in this big family?  "I think pretty well. I didn't wait. When I got there, I knew they were going to be upset. So after Xander told them his part of things, I immediately told them mine. I believe it's better to play it straight and lay it all out there, then they can draw their own conclusions," Tera replies.

Name a song that represents your relationship.  "A Thousand Years by Christina Perri," Xander answers without hesitation. Tera nods her agreement. "It fits us perfectly."

Jesse and Lucy what's a normal day with the babies in CFD like?  Lucy laughs. "Craziness. Chaos. Insanity. But I love every minute of it."

Lucy, do you still get overwhelmed ?  "Yes," she admits. "Sometimes I feel like I need six more arms and even then it wouldn't be enough. Going from no children to four has taken a while to adjust to, and as they grow older and learn new things, we have to adjust again." Lucy looks at Jesse who gently squeezes her hand. "We just do our best to be the best parents we can be."

Jesse when Lucy gets into one of her moods what do you to help her feel better?  "I just hold her and listen, try and soothe her as best as I can. I remind her she's not the only one who gets overwhelmed, and that's why we need to lean on one another. I don't want her to feel she has to take all of that on by herself. If holding her doesn't work, I fuck her until she can't think anymore. That usually works," Jesse smirks and Lucy laughs.

Meg and Trace can we expect a wedding soon? Trace looks panicked. "Uh…" I'm just kidding no pressure!  Trace visibly relaxes.

How do you guys spend your days when you're not doing anything band related?  Hiking, Hanging at the beach. Swimming. Go to the gym. Shooting at the range so one day I can show up Sera," Meggie teases. "Some days we just do nothing."

Ben and Coley, It's so lovely to see you both, especially Nicole. How are you feeling?  Nicole smiles. "I'm feeling well. My blood work keeps coming back in the good ranges and that alone is a reason to smile."

What's been going on with the both of you?  "We're looking into adopting two children. They're brother and sister and their lives haven't been good. You'll find out more as soon as we know more," Ben explains.

If you guys could live anywhere, where would it be and why?  "Right where we are. I can't imagine not being around family," Nicole admits. "I lived without much family my entire life. Our home is full of love and fun. It's a great place to live."

So we got through the couples, and boy did I not realize how many couples we have aha, okay so that leaves Kennedy and Ethan.  Ethan and Kennedy look at one another.  

How are you guys doing being the only bachelors left ? Aha  "I think if Lucy could marry us off, she would," Kennedy says. "She tries to match make but it doesn't work. She has no idea what our types are."  

Ethan nods in agreement.  "It's better that way."

With all these couples and kids around does it ever get overwhelming having so many people around ?  Ethan shakes his head. "Nah. We've always had our group so adding some more is cool. I'm not a fan of silence."

What's your guys favorite movie?  "Superhero movies. Iron Man. Superman." Ethan looks at Cage who smirks. "Batman. Suicide Squad. Though I don't like Spiderman. I'm looking forward to Justice League."

"Action films," Kennedy announces. "Die Hard. The Accountant. Déjà vu. Anything that has action and a bit of mystery to the plot. I love that shit."

Ethan rolls his eyes. "He usually guesses who the bad guy is in the beginning of the movie and the fucker's always right. Way to ruin a movie, man."

Kennedy shrugs.

Before we finish off and let you guys go, just a couple of more questions open to anyone.

What are your favorite memories of the babies?  "When Kierah threw a fist full of carrots at Xander," Lucy says with a laugh. "Hilarious."

Which couple would you say is the kinkiest? ;) "Jesse and Lucy," everyone says at the same time. Jesse and Lucy look at one another and grin.

For the girls, out of all the guys who do you think is the romantic?  "Cage," Meggie says. "He's always doing something sweet and romantic for or with Sera. It's so lovely."

Guys with girls : what are 3 things you like about the other - physical and non physical

Lucy: "Jesse loves me completely. He is always there for me. He can sex me up like nobody's business."

Jesse:  "Lucy makes me feel whole. She's always got the answer when I'm not sure about something. She is as kinky as I am."

Meggie: "Trace's kind of alpha caveman. It's hot. He gets up before me and brings me coffee in bed. He enjoys doing the same things I do."

Trace: "Meggie's beautiful and sexy. I can talk to her about anything without judgment. She loves music as much as I do."

Jace: "Summer's nurturing. She doesn't take anyone's shit. She loves every part of me."

Summer:  "Jace puts the toilet seat down after he pees. He knows how to cook. He

knows how to love me without stifling me."

Nicole:  "Ben seems to know what I want before I even say it. He loved me at my weakest and at my strongest. He supports me in everything I do or want to do."

Ben: "She never holds anything back from me. She loves me even when I'm a dumbass. She didn't bang Lucien."

Sera: "Cage loves and understands me like no one ever has. He loves me fiercely. He's Batman."

Cage: "Sera's the strongest woman I've ever met. She trusts me with her heart. She thinks I'm a superhero."

Tera: "Xander never gave up on me, even in the worst of times. He's fun and goofy. He loves everything about me."

Xander: "Tera waited for me. She's not afraid to do what she needs to do for herself as well as for others. I admire that. She's as fun and goofy as I am."

Last one, will you guys sing an R&B song for me?  "Hell yeah," Xan announces. "We'll come up with something sexy for you." Xander wiggles his eyebrows.

Thank you guys so much for being here with me! I had so much fun interviewing you guys and getting to know you better. I hope you guys have a great rest of your day!

"Thank you so much for having us!" Lucy replies. "It was definitely our pleasure."

Everyone murmurs their agreement and start filing out of the room.

"Yo, Cage dude," Xan says.

Cage looks at him and lifts a brow.

"Can I borrow your cape sometime?"

Without hesitation, Cage answers, "No," and keeps on walking while Xan tries to talk him into it.

[lovemesomesurveys]

5,000 Question Survey--Part twenty-two

Uh... so I found this in my drafts. Apparently, I went from part twenty-one to twenty-three, skipping right over this one. So... here it is. Out of order. I’m leaving what I had answered already, so the answers aren’t current until 2053. Not that it matters, but yeah.

2001. Can you believe that we have only gotten through two fifths of this survey so far? I’d probs be further along, but it’s taken me awhile. I forgot about it for a bit.

2002. What is your opinion of Dave Coulier? I don’t really have much of an opinion on him. I know him from Full House, but that’s it. Oh, and that he dated Alanis Morrisette, which her song, “Oughta Know” is about. 2003. If you were to a write a Choose Your Own Adventure book, what would it be about? I used to love those books as a kid! They were fun. I don’t know, what kind I would write. Probably a mystery one like the ones I used to read. 2004. What was your best find from a flea market, garage sale, ebay or thrift store? I haven’t gotten anything from any of those things/places.  2005. What do you not have enough money for right now? Anything. I’m broke at the moment.

2006. Do you believe that Teras for Fears were right when they said, "Everybody wants to rule the world?" Nah. I know I don’t want to rule the world.  2007. What is the design on your beach towel? I don’t have a beach towel.  2008. What stirs something deep and animalistic inside you? Uhh. I don’t know. 2009. Have you ever cross dressed (even as a joke)? Nope.

2010. Do you own anything with a rainbow on it? I don’t. 2011. What would be the worst object for a child to take on a long car ride with you? Anything that made a lot of annoying noises. Or played something repeatedly.  2012. What's the Best Beatles song in your opinion? I don’t have a favorite. I like a few, but that’s it. 2013. Why do you suppose that diary sites are more popular with females than males? I don’t know? 2014. What do these color combinations remind you of: orange and pink: Sherbet. pink and green: A pink flower. green and gold: Money.  purple and gold: I don’t know. gold and red: San Francisco 49ers. red and white: Candy canes. blue and grey: Not sure. 2015. What is one selfish thing you tend to do? I’ve been kind of selfish this past year dealing with my health stuff. Chronic illness can be very isolating. I’ve pushed people away. I’ve holed up at home. I haven’t been there for my friends. It hasn’t been good.  2016. When do you think technology will catch up with the Jetson's? I don’t know, man. It’s funny to think that people thought it would be that way by the year 2000. We’re a digital age for sure, but there’s still no flying cars. Though, I don’t even know how that work to be honest. Can you imagine all those cars in the sky? Everyone would have to take flying lessons. Learn the routes. It would be expensive as hell. Craaaazy. 2017. What made you laugh today? My brother. 2018. Do you ever stick your entries in any of the diary circles? I don’t use LiveJournal. 2019. Can you freestyle rap? Haha no.

2020. Are you: stylish? I don’t know. I wear what I like, so since I like it that means I think it looks cute/nice. I follow some trends, but not because it’s “in.” If I like it, I’ll wear it. There’s a lot of fashion trends that I’m like, ...no. 

shiek? Is this supposed to be chic? If so, isn’t that the same as stylish? smart? Meh. I guess. I mean, we all are in different ways. I always think of the Einstein quote that basically says don’t judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree. That’s not it’s area or its skill. But put it in its environment, and it knows what to do.  2021. Do you find you self only buying brand name products? Not always. With some things, yes. 2022. Would you ever want to buy an article of clothing or an acessory because you saw a celebrity wear it? If I saw it, and liked it. Not just because that celebrity wore it. Like I said, I wear what I like, not just what is “in.” 2023. What song do you feel the sexiest dancing to? I don’t feel sexy. 

2024. Who do you know who looks silly when they dance? Me. 2025. Sweaty sex or clean sex? Virgin. 2026. Which is more important to you: being kind or being right? Being kind. 2027. Can you do any special dances like swing, tap, or ballroom? Nope. 2028. Are you scared of monsters? No.  2029. Who would you like to remind people of? I don’t know. No one? 2030. Do you walk to school or do you bring your lunch? I’m no longer in school. 2031. Rate your skills from one to ten (10 = you are the best at it): socializing: making friends: working with computers: arts: crafts: dancing: skating: talking other people into things: writing: living life to the fullest each day: cooking: gardening: cleaning up after yourself: playing poker: surviving in the woods: managing your time: attracting the opposite sex (or same sex if you prefer)? 2032. Have you ever been to an indian reservation? No. 2033. What is going to happen tommorrow that you can celebrate, even if it's a little thing? I don’t have anything going on. 2034. Do you save things for special occassions or is everyday a special occassion? I certainly don’t feel like everyday is a special occasion.  2035. What is one thing you are terrible at: Just one thing? 2036. What's your favorite: rap song: country song: industrial song: cover song: punk song: odd song: 2037. What do you get your teacher or your boss for the holidays? I only got a few teachers something for the holidays, it wasn’t something I did every year. I probably did it more often in elementary school. It would be something a box of candy. 2038. Do you like to read books by Virgina Wolfe? I’m not familiar with that author.  2039. What is your favorite tv show from when you were a kid? When I was like 4 I was obsessed with Barney. Like obsessed. I’d be upset if I had to miss an episode, so my mom would record them lol. I’d re-watch episodes, and I was always singing the songs. I’m sure I was rather annoying. 2040. What is now proved was once only imagined. - William Blake. What do you imagine? I don’t know. 2041. What has been passed down through at least two generations to you? Like a physical item? Nothing. As for something genetic, there’s some health stuff. 2042. Do we live in a particularly bad age for romance? No? 2043. Have you ever cheated on someone? No. Do you believe that once someone is a cheater they can never be trusted? Not necessarily. But it would take a lot of work getting that trust back. 2044. Have you ever gone: christmas caroling? Yes. pumpkin picking? Yes. on a hay wagon ride? Yes. on a romantic valentine's day date? No. to a new year's eve party? Yes. to a memorial day parade? No. to the Macy's thanksgiving day parade? Nope. to search for gold coins on st patrick's day? Nope. 2045. Have you ever done any modeling? Ha, no. 2046. Would you consider yourself to be psychologically damaged? I got some issues.  2047. How aware are you of the reasons behind your actions and words? I don’t know how aware I am? Like I don’t know how to rate that. 2048. What is the sickest you ever drank or drugged yourself? I’ve gotten pretty sick from drinking. Not fun. 2049. Would you prefer it if clothing was optional? No. 2050. What is one interesting fact about you: I’m obsessed with giraffes. I don’t know if that’s interesting, but that’s what I got.

2051. Are more people depressed because they are alone, or are more people alone because they are depressed? It’s like a loop for some people.  2052. Have you ever gotten a mug, t-shirt, key chain, etc. that was personalized with your picture? Nope. 2053. What was the last thing that you experienced for the first time? Golden Double Stuffed Oreos dipped in coffee. I’ve talked about this a few times, but it’s SO good. 2054. If you were going to die tomorrow and you were leaving a postcard for someone to read after you were gone what would it say? I really don’t know. 2055. If you were about to be executed what would your last request be? I wouldn’t be concerned with that. I’d be scared about the fact I was being executed. 2056. What kinds of people do you find intimidating? The intimidating kind. 2057. How much conviction do you have in your feelings and beliefs? I don’t know how to put an amount on that. I truly believe what I believe and feel what I feel? Maybe my feelings aren’t always justified, or maybe they’re exaggerated, but I still feel them wholeheartedly. 2058. In your house where is the: crazy glue? We don’t have any. flashlight? My dad has big, bright one he keeps in his closet. 2059. Out of everyone you know who has the most personality? Hmm. My younger brother or my mom. 2060. If you could go back in time to experince a musical movement or era, which one would you choose to live through? I’m not sure. 2061. Do you suffocate people with your love? No, I don’t think so. 2062. Do you feel your life is charmed? No. 2063. What character do you identify the most with from Winnie the Pooh? Pooh Bear because he’s always hungry and thinking about honey, which same but instead of honey I’m always thinking about food and the next meal. I’m also like Piglet because I’m anxious and scared of everything. 2064. When do you do your best thinking? In the shower or while lying out on the beach. 2065. What motivates you? Nothing. :/ 2066. Look back at all the people you've dated. Has there been a pattern? There’s only been two, so. I can’t really make any patterns out of that. 2067. Things change but what will always remain the same for you? My love for my family. And to be a downer, I’ll always have my health issues. 2068. Is divorce something you would ever consider or do you feel that marriage is permanantly binding? If I ever got married, and things just weren’t working out after we tried working on our marriage and used the resources and help available to us, then divorce would be the next step. I believe in trying to work things out first, if possible. Unless it’s an extreme case and abuse is involved.  2069. What's the strangest movie you ever saw? Hmm. There’s been a few. A Clockwork Orange came to mind first. 2070. If you could go into virtual reality and set up your life there to be perfect and it would seem real but not be real would you trade your life now for the virtual life? I’d sure like to try it out at least. 2071. Does it seem like life is more difficult for you than for anyone else? We all have our struggles. Sometimes it might seem like other people have it all figured out and don’t have many problems, but truth is you just never really know what someone is going through. I guess; though, because we are the ones experiencing our life and the difficulties we face, it may seem more difficult in comparison sometimes just cause it’s your reality. That’s why I don’t like when people say you shouldn’t be upset because others have it worse. It doesn’t make what I’m experiencing any less or any better. It’s very real for me. 2072. What are you grateful for? My family first and foremost, a roof over my head, clothes to wear, and food to eat. 2073. What was a choice that you didn't want to make but you had to? Health related things. 2074. Have you ever had dental surgery? Yes. 2075. At what point exactly are you grown up? I don’t think there’s a certain point that everyone is automatically a grown up. Legally, you’re an adult by a certain age, but being “grown up” is different. 2076. If there was a weightloss procedure that would destroy your ability to taste food so you wouldn't be tempted by junk food, would you have it done? No. I don’t need a weight loss procedure. 2077. What is one thing that happened that you never expected? Again, some health related things. That’s the focus of my life if you haven’t noticed. It’s really the center of everything. 2078. If you called one of your friends and they said "It's nothing personal but I don't want to talk to anyone right now," would you take it personally? I would try and understand because that’s how I’ve been feeling. For quite awhile, actually. And yet, I probably would be bothered by it slightly. Ridiculous, I know. I definitely shouldn’t. 2079. What is your favorite girl's name? I don’t really have a favorite girl’s name. 2080. Do you ever feel guilty for being more fortunate then others? I feel fortunate, grateful, and appreciative. That’s why I try not to take things for granted. I feel sad others aren’t so fortunate, and I wish that wasn’t the case. It doesn’t make me a bad person or should feel guilty about because I am, though. 2081. If you had to wear a shirt with one word on it for a year, what word would you choose? Coffee. 2082. What is evian spelled backwards? Naive. Ha. 2083. You drop 10 pounds of feathers and a ten pound bowling ball off the top of the same building. Which will hit the ground first? Isn’t it the feathers? If I recall correctly. 2084. Even though you may never get what you want, are you happy because you're trying? I’m not happy. :/ I don’t give myself a lot of credit. I feel like I could be doing more than what I am. 2085. If you started a petition what would it be about? I have no idea. 2086. When was the last time you asked someone to do something and they said no? Hmm... not sure. 2087. Do bad things happen to you on friday the 13th? Something bad might happen, but not because it’s Friday the 13th. Bad things happen other days, too. So, I wouldn’t say any more so. 2088. What's your favorite: Madonna song? John Lennon song? Michael Jackson song? Doors song? Rolling Stones song? David Bowie song? Elvis song? 2089. If you had started a relationship with someone and they said that it would be best if no one knew about it just to see how it goes, would you be offended? Absolutely. I wouldn’t be okay with that. 2090. Do you know any self defence? I’d be kind of screwed. How about CPR? Nope. 2091. If you had to look into a mirror and see your naked soul stripped of all delusions and pretenses (Never ending Story style)could you handle it? Uhhh. 2092. Are you a genius? Haha nooo. Not even close. I’m very much average. 2093. How did you find out that Santa Clause wasn't real? I think I saw the presents were already put out or something like that. 2094. Which is your favorite tarot card? I don’t have one. I don’t believe in that. 2095. Does the internet seperate people or connect them? It can do both. 2096. Have you ever written a letter to a soldier? No. 2097. Does pain and fear make you feel alive? No. 2098. Are you: good looking? I don’t think I am. thin? Yes. happy? No.

successful? No. confident? Noo. 2099. Are you deciseive or wishy washy? I’m very indecisive. 2100. Do you feel pop stars should be morally responsible to set a good example for their fans? That’s not their responsibility, no. If they want to be, great, but it’s not their job.

[tellytantra]

!!!! ... TU HI TU ... !!!! "Urgh!!! Don't talk to me She shouted while running towards the staircase, Her face twisted in annoyance. She stomped her feet on each step as she ascended the stairs. A couple of steps up and she stopped. "Don't even try to follow me... Turning back she warned and her face twisted more as the sound of mischievous laughter traveled to her way and filled her ears. "YOU MORON She gritted her teeth and her hand reached to her foot.  Removing her shoe she hurled it towards the source of laughter before stomping towards her room. "Aahhh...you violent girl words traveled to her and she looked back "Serves you right She retorted back before she slammed her room door shut "Uhun... He picked up a shoe that hit on his head, "Silly girl... He shook his head while climbing up the stairs with a shoe in his one hand and a large chocolate bar in the other. "What happened to you...? He asked as he pushed the door open and walked inside... "You have become so much violent...just for a chocolate you... He stopped as she hopped out of the bed glaring at him... "And what about you...that chocolate is mine and you snatched it while I was eating... "What would I do? "You were not ready to share it... He asked showing her the chocolate bar... "It's mine and I am not in mood of sharing it with anyone...don't you understand... She shouted while stomping towards him. She jumped to snatch the chocolate from his hand while he held it up... "Give it back... She yelled as he moved back grinning "Take it...if you can... He moved quickly before she reached to him and soon they started running around the room and messing the things that came in their way... "You should stop eating such things, can't you see, you have gained weight He teased increasing her temper... She stopped, her murderous gaze focused on him as her hand moved to pick up an alarm clock from the table... "What did you say? She gritted her teeth as she aimed the clock toward him "Hey...hey...stop... He tried stopping her... She raised her hand moving forward and her leg twisted as she stepped on the charger cable that was hanging down the table... "Aaahh... Squeezing her eyes tight she cried out expecting to hit on the floor... "You silly girl He shook his head rushing towards her as he watched her falling... Chocolate bar dropped from his hand before his hands wrapped around her preventing her fall... "Ohhh... He tried to balance himself but failed and landed on the floor with her on the top... His hands wrapped around her while her hands tightly fisted the fabric of his shirt... with eyes closed and breathing heavy both stayed silent for some moment... "Zoya... He whispered and slowly she lifted her face up... Her silky traces playing on his face made him squeeze his eyes again... A smile lifted the corner of her lips as she watched the irritation on his face... Her grip on his shirt loosened as her hand moved to touch his face when he opened his eyes and she pulled her hand back... His brows rose questioningly and she shook her head looking other way... A sudden grip of his fingers on her waist and her breath hitched as he flipped her changing their position... "Uhunn...what are you doing She whined as her back touched the floor "What? He placed his both hands on either side of her as he hovered and held her questioning gaze... "You were not in a mood of getting up...now you can rest here as long as you want...and yes... He stopped moving back, "Enjoy your chocolate... Grabbing the chocolate bar he held it to her... "Huh? Not getting any reaction from her he leaned narrowing his eyes as she stared at him... Her hand moved to touch his face and smile graced on her lips noticing his confused expressions... "I want to share it...with you... She mumbled as her hand reached to touch his face and her forehead creased... A sudden shrill sound of an alarm and she sprinted up from the bed... "Huh? "It was dream...? Tu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun hai Tu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun hai  Confused she looked around and sighed... "Idiot... Grabbing a hair tie from the side table she shook her head while tying her hair in a messy bun... "kitna sunaya tha us din...jaise maine jaan boojh ke gira diya ho tumhe... She made a face while walking towards the bathroom...recalling the incident... "Stupid... "Don't know why I am excited to see you...it has been exact two years four months and seven days now and there was not a single day jab maine tumhe yaad nahi kiya hoga...but tumhe toh yaad bhi nahi aati hogi meri... Lost in thoughts she pushed the bathroom door open... "Aaahhh... She gasped... a sound muffled against her palm as she stepped back in shock... with wide eyes she stared ahead... "Cursing me...huh? He crossed his arms and she blinked "Asad... stunned she stared at him and he smiled... Moving a step ahead she raised her hand to touch him and he moved back... She stepped ahead while he kept moving back... He leaned back to the wall and she smiled... Her hand moved while her eyes conveying her joy... "You look taller than before... She mumbled raising her hand... "Ummm... A frown appeared on her face as her hand touched the wall... Raastey har dafa, sirf tera pata Mujhse pooche bhala kyun hai "God!!! Moving back she held her head irritated, "Why I am imagining you everywhere? She groaned when a laugh reached her way... "You are missing me She could see him standing near sink... with that mischievous smile... Tu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun haiTu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun haiWo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho.. She shook her head smiling to herself as he disappeared again... "Hmm...Miss toh bohat kiya maine but what about you? "I know bilkul miss nahi kiya tumne mujhe... Grumpily she fetched out a brush and toothpaste and started brushing her teeth... "I never thought goodbye can be pleasing too He waved his hand from the mirror and she huffed more increasing her brushing speed remembering his words... "You being away never gave me any pleasure...but you were enjoying your time... She huffed as she turned the faucet on... "Hey...how are you? Deleting the text many times she finally hit the arrow... It's been six months he had gone and he hadn't even texted her once... "Urgh!!! She sulked as after whole five minutes of wait he didn't see her message even though he was online... Placing the phone aside she decided to continue her reading but the thought kept bugging in her mind, Who it could be he is chatting with?' Almost fifteen minutes later her phone beeped and hurriedly she check the notification on screen and that moment she realized he was her favorite notification... But the next moment smile on her face turned into frown, "What type of question is this? She pressed her lips together and her forehead creased as she read his reply... "I expected this type of reply only..." She typed and sent with angry emoticon "But I didn't expect your message" "Did you send it to me by mistake?" Came back his reply and she gritted her teeth and her fingers tightened around the device... "Yes...actually I was texting someone else but don't know how it delivered to your number" She hit the arrow and growled as the next moment she watched the series of smiling face with open mouth and tears of joys emoticon on the screen... "You are still the same stupid Zoya" Followed his text and she send the series of angry emo's before throwing her phone aside... "What did he think of himself? She growled as again her phone beeped... "If you were texting someone else then why you did expect my reply?" She huffed and her hand rose when again the device in her hand beeped... "Save that poor device... I know habits don't die so as your temper tantrums..." She read and cursed the moment she decided to message him... "Suits you as well...after whole six months you have not changed a bit..." She sighed leaning against the bedpost "Ohh...it has been six months I didn't realize" She didn't reply to his message and watched the screen as he was still typing... "But why you are counting the days...are you missing me?" another text flashed followed by astonished face emoji and that brought a small smile on her face... "I guess yes..." She thought while typing,"Seems you are enjoying your time there" "And why would I miss you...its peaceful here without you around" "Yeah...working with Mehek is fun...even though the work load is too much it's never felt tiring when she is around..." Her face twisted in distaste as she read the text... Mehek was a daughter of his father's business partner... She was going to handle their new branch in Bangalore and she insisted Asad to come and help her till everything was settle... "Hmm...so you are not missing to be here...I mean missing home?" She stared at the screen as his reply didn't come for next ten minutes... "Why would he miss anyone? He has changed a lot earlier...after Mehek's arrival Feeling depressed she was going to place her phone aside when it again beeped "Actually I don't have time to miss anything..." His reply saddened her and she decided not to reply back... "Where have you gone?" "You didn't answer my question" "Why suddenly you texted me? "Don't tell me you are really missing me" She watched as the screen kept flashing with his messages but ignoring it she buried her face in her soft pillow... "Why I am missing you" Soona soona mann ka hai konaa  Soona soona tere bin hona hai har kahin par Tu hai tu nhi hai par Tu hai o bekhabar Tu hai har mod par "So you missed me a lot...huh? He smiled in the mirror             She shook her head and taking a handful of water she threw it on the mirror... "You are Sooo...Uhunn...Annoying... His image faded and cursing him she walked out... "Zoyaaa...where are you? Someone shouted from the door... "Uff...you are still not ready...we are getting late "God!!! Najma!!! "We don't have any appointment that we get late... Taking out her clothes she shut the door of her closet and turned, "It's just shopping... "I am not talking about shopping...you know Bhai is coming, right? Najma replied as she sat on the bed and took out a book that was placed under pillow... "And after shopping we are going to the airport...I have missed him a lot She sighed as she flipped the pages... "How it was so much fun when he was here... Every Saturday night he used to take us to the lake for that special kulfi...hai na? Najma reminisced, "And how much you both used to fight all the time... Najma asked looking up while Zoya sighed "Yes...your Bhai is so annoying... Najma laughed as Zoya made a face and walked towards the washroom, "Hehhe...actually I have missed your fights too... "Umm...me too...those fights were irritating and amusing at the same time She breathed leaning against the washroom door... Paas ho to bura, door ho toh buraAisa mere Khuda kyun haiWo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho.. "I'll wait for next five minutes only" He warned as he sat on her bed waiting for her to come out from the washroom "Why you are here? She shouted from inside, "Where is Najma?" "She asked me to see if you are ready? "Now stop your inquiry and hurry up! "But why you want me to come with you two" Coming out of the washroom she inquired Getting up he walked towards her, "I just thought to be nice as you are my sister's Best Friend... But it's up to you, I don't mind if you reject my offer..." He crossed his arms standing in front of her... his gaze was challenging that made her nervous and she looked other way... "Umm...Najma won't like if I refused, so I am coming for her only..." She said avoiding him and walked out in hurry... "Is it? He asked as he followed her, "But I guess it's not only Najma but..." Coming beside her he whispered mischievously... "What but..." She glared pointing her index finger towards him, "I don't have any interest in coming with you...you understood?" He laughed as he pushed his hands in his jeans pocket, "I didn't say it's me..." His brows raised and he leaned towards her, "I was talking about Kulfi..." Moving back he grinned and she seethed in anger as he descended the stairs whistling... "Urgh!!! Idiot!!! She stomped her feet following him out but her leg twisted, "Aahhh...ouch!!! She cried in pain... "Hey..." He rushed to her as she sat on the stairs holding her ankle, "Tsk!! you should be careful..." sitting beside her he examined her ankle and she stared at him as he looked worried... "Is it paining..." He asked and she shook her head trying to get up... "You don't bother...I am fine... and you shouldn't have worried that much for your sister's best friend..." She tried to walk holding on the railing when coming beside her he wrapped his hand around her shoulder helping her... "There is one more reason for me to get worried you know? He asked and she looked up, "You are my sister's best friend that means you are like my sister too..." He said and her eyes widened, "Isn't it my duty to take care of my sister..." "What?" She yelled pushing his hand off of her shoulder, "I am not your sister..." "Ohh..." He raised his brows and leaned to her... His hands braced on the railing caging her and her grip on the railing tightened as he looked in her eyes, his breath fanned her face... "Then what you are to me?" He was just inches apart and she closed her eyes... Her heart raced as he didn't bother to move back and taking a deep breath she opened her eyes... "Tell me..." He insisted She gulped before pushing him away from her, "Nothing!" Avoiding looking to him she tried to walked down the stairs when he again came beside her, "How it can be nothing? "You can at least call me your best friend's brother...right?" He asked and she stopped... "Will you just shut up?" "Yes..." He grinned and before she knew it he picked her up in his arms... "YOU..." She wriggled in his arm... "Put me down...I can walk..."             "Shhh!!! Don't shout...I am just helping my sister's best friend..." "Najma won't like if you miss your college tomorrow because of sprained ankle..." He said balancing her in his arms while she just stared at his face... There was something in his smile... and she felt her heart suddenly raced...something stirred inside and she closed her eyes...   "Looks like you are enjoying much...huh?" He whispered staring at her face... "Urgh!! You...leave me" she wiggled and tried to punch her elbow in his ribs He laughed at her action, "Think about your best friend, she won't like the way you treated her brother..." He teased more and she sulked zipping her mouth noticing Najma walking towards them... "Zoyaaa...hurry up na... Najma shouted banging on washroom door but the moment door clicked open she forgot even blinking and stared at Zoya open mouthed... Zoya shook her head at Najma's reaction, "Stop staring like you have seen a ghost or something Walking towards the dressing table she set her hair... "What happened to you Zoya? Walking towards her Najma checked her temperature, "Bukhar toh nahi charrh gaya? "Yeh dress, dupatta, straight hair... Allah!!! What happen to my friend She exclaimed noticing Zoya in light blue straight chiffon dress with dupatta around her neck and her straight loose neatly set hair... She couldn't believe her eyes as she wasn't used to see this girly type Zoya... "Stop exaggerating... "For a change I wear dress today, what is wrong in this? Najma shook her head, "Nothing is wrong...But... She said still not believing... "Now come...or else you will be late, right? Zoya dragged her out trying to avoid Najma's questioning and also hiding the smile that wasn't ready to left her face... Feeling fresh under her favorite perfume and some breezes in her hairs, she drove Najma and herself to the shopping centre... When she looked into the rear view mirror, her eyes collided with his dark chocolate ones...those that chases her every dream and those that she never could forget... She turned to look behind on reflex and found him waving a hey' making her eyes go wide. "Zoya...watch where your're driving Najma touched Zoya's shoulders in alarm and Zoya looked in front of her again. "kya hua? "Nothing Zoya waved off with a silly shrug. Next moment she heard him laughing out loud with that mischievous smile and she narrowed her eyes in directing them at him from the rear view mirror, where he winked at her. She looked back again and he was gone. Giving a smug look to Najma she sighs steering the car into the parking lot... Raastey har dafa, sirf tera pataMujhse pooche bhala kyun hai Najma was on a shopping spree tagging Zoya everywhere, but Zoya's mind was far away in wondering how things are going to be when he would get back this evening. She was so much into thinking that now it was making her nervous in the pit of her stomach. "zoya c'mon try these, they're so pretty! Najma ushered Zoya into the changing room, with some dresses. As zoya was trying to close down the chain at the back, she heard someone chuckle, not just anyone, someone for whom she was waiting desperately... She stared at him in the mirror standing behind her. "Back again? she rolled her eyes, half mocking at the weird sightings she has been seeing of him. "Don't you think you've gained so much wait? This dress won't fit you at his words, Zoya's eyes widened and she turned around to glare at him. Why was he so infuriating? "Nobody's asking for your opinion so I'd appreciate if you'd shut up and help me she huffed and tried to close the chain roughly. He chuckled feeding on her fury and she scowled at him from her bright eyes. "Uh hunh! I'm tired but I'd like to see you try he said and leaned on the wall folding his hands as he did. Zoya's smile grew bigger as she finally pulled up the chain and straightened her dress, glancing at the empty wall proudly. Finding him nowhere she again shook her head. She smiled a small smile while exiting the changing room. Asad used to help her in many ways but he also made sure that she learned to do everything herself. Now that she came to think about it maybe behind his hard demeanor, he hid his care. Najma gave her a thumbs up for three more dresses she tried and then when she was back in the dress she wore previously and was putting the new dresses away, she felt him tugging her hand and closing in on her. His hand caressed her face and down her arm to hold her hand. She shivered in this beautiful figment of her imagination. "I'm glad you remember my favourite colour, this dress suits you Zoya her name came out as a gentle caress and she stared back into his eyes. "More than this, it's your simplicity that adorns you. He smiled his charming smile at her before the warmth she felt was gone again. Ek pal pyaar ka zindagi se badaAisa mere Khuda kyun haiWo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho..Wo.. oo.. ho.. She remembered the day Asad was leaving, there were so many emotions in those eyes. She wanted to say so many things then but she also needed time to get her mind clear. She had no right to keep him from going too, he was a career minded strong man and she admired him for that... "So? he asked her.  "So what? she played cool leaning on the balcony and looking down on the road where he was standing with his luggage, his taxi waiting in the background. "Will you manage to not fall in trouble without me? he raised his eyebrows at her amusingly. "Oh please! Don't acts like my knight in shining armor okay! I can take care of myself. She folded her hands supported by the railings and he nodded. "Really? Without me? he grinned up at her. She narrowed her eyes at him and said tongue in cheek "really! Without you..." "No chance of missing me then? he asked rolling his sleeves up his arm. She giggled mocking him with a knowing look "why? Are you expecting to be missed by me?" "No way! I just don't want you to trouble Ammi by crying all day for me...do whatever you want to do, I don't care..." He shrugged with an expressionless face. "Why would I cry after you? For me it's a relief to be honest...with you the control freak gone thodi shaanti hogi ghar mein" she smirked down at him as he shook his head. The honk of the taxi made them both look in its directions. The next moment when their eyes connected, there were so many things unsaid, so many emotions unexpressed but felt right from heart. He just twisted his lips into a wry smile and waved off before heading to the taxi while she was left with a fake returning smile. "Bye Asad! Find someone to trouble when you miss me." she called out to him and he turned on his heels facing her back but kept walking backwards while gesturing as he spoke, "There ain't anybody like you.." he winked and then he was gone... Teri meri baki hai kahaani Teri meri aadhi hai kahaani Aa gayi wo mod par Tu gaya jo chhod kar Mere dil ko tod kar... kya mil gaya... Writer:Prinky & Suermaniac After a day filled with him swimming in her imaginations she went to sleep sadly, feeling empty on the inside. That evening when Najma and Zoya were going to the airport, they were informed that Asad's flight was canceled and since then zoya's spirits came crashing down to the ground level. Next morning she woke up late, when the sun was shining bright and happy. She smiled as the fresh breezes rushed inside her room with the sun rays caressing her skin. She remembered closing the balcony door yesterday night. Thinking that Najma might have opened it early morning she again slipped under the duvet and let lose herself in the welcoming warmness. Her eyes did a double take when she spotted a manly figure standing in the sun's way. The brightness didn't allow her to see more than a shadow but she knew better. Her heartbeats started hammering inside as she squinted her eyes to see properly until he came inside and smiled at her... That smile for a moment held her hand and swirled into her dream world but then she came back to reality realizing Asad's flight was canceled. She lay down on the bed again covering her eyes with her arms... "God! Pareshaan kar rakha hai... Kal bhi dreams mein aaye, then the whole day you followed me and didn't leave me alone last night too. Now again... you're just everywhere! She kicked off the duvet from above her when she heard him chuckle again. He hovered over her, the top two buttons of his shirt open for giving her a nice view. The scent of his cologne filled her senses and she breathed in peacefully, strangely feeling so complete like she never felt in the past two and a half year... Itna toh bata mausamo ki tarah Tu badalta gaya kyun hai Wo. oo. ho. Wo. oo. ho. Wo. oo. ho. "You will never change, hai na? The banter queen? his warm breathe sent ripples of nervousness around her body. His voice never felt so alive in all her imaginations like it did today. She was breathing hard all this while and closed her eyes when he leaned in to drop a sound and tender kiss on her cheeks... Sometimes it takes time to realize what one feels for someone. When Asad got away from home he felt that incompleteness in every action he did and in every moment he lived. He was confused with the cyclone of so many emotions whirling around inside him then when he left. But being away for a period of time he has realized what is it all about... It's love... Who's the girl? Zoya... That very same stupid at times and very easily irritated and annoyed Zoya whom he enjoyed to tease so much. Zoya was his neighbor from last fifteen years and have bonded well with his Ammi and Najma. She somewhere warmed up to Asad too. Every time she walked in the house wanting to meet her best friend Najma, she'll always come face to face with her best friend's brother as she called him. Zoya was a broad minded and smart girl, her early educational training was in New York but after her mother's demise she moved back to India with her dad. She spent most of the time at his house and even stayed over whenever her dad was busy. Busy is an understatement for her dad. He was always busy in and out of the town and even country seldom. She was a part of his family and he became habitual to her presence. But all this time away from his family and her, he felt that value of her presence in his life... Zoya was a fresh air that he always wanted to breathe in. but from last two years unfortunately, he only was able to take a whiff in from what he saw of her in his dreams or in daydreams. He was never a person who would zone out. But it didn't matter whether he was in public or alone, he'd always hear her giggling or frowning at him as he teased her... Tu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun hai Tu hi tu har jagah, aaj kal kyun hai Raastey har dafa, sirf tera pataMujhse pooche bhala kyun hai Na mai apna raha...na kisi aur ka Aisa mere khudaa,, kyu hai! Wo oh o...wo oh o...wo oh o... Her eyes shot open as she felt his lips on her cheeks. Her heart did a double take and she flushed at the touch. Was it real? How can it be so good to be real? She raised her hand to touch his stubble face. His happy eyes gazed back in hers which were full of wonderment. "Are you for real? she whispered and his lips curved up into a smirk. "Shall I prove it again? he cocked his eyebrows and let his gaze fall down to her lips. She fisted the lapels of her dress and stared at his lips too. He came closer and she closed her eyes, wanting to get her fantasy fulfilled in her imaginations at least... He watched her holding her breath in anticipation and couldn't hold his laughter anymore. He moved back and burst out laughing half rolling on the bed. Zoya's eyes flew open for the second time too shocked to react. "You! she gasped, her eyes zeroing in on him. She threw a pillow at him and he tossed it back with his elbow laughing hard. "You've been always that playful! Why don't you just vanish from here like all other times! she threw another cushion at him and he caught it on time...  Resting his chin on the softness he asked her with innocent eyes, "why Zoya? Why do you want me to vanish? "Because every time I see you around, every time you come in my dreams, every time Phupi speaks of you and Najma tells me she misses our fights, I miss you damn it! she slumped her shoulders down in defeat with a sigh and covered her face with both her palms... "I don't want to see you... Go away! Asad sobers up and shifts near her, holding down her hands, but she kept her eyes shut. "Par mai ab wapas aagaya hu...you won't have to miss me anymore. "I tried not to miss you ...par abhi do minute mein gayab ho jaaoge...I'll start missing you again! she sighs averting her eyes from his... "You don't believe me do you? he asked her but before she could say something more Najma walked in the room with a bright smile... "Oh bhaijaan! You already met her...ahahaaha zoya...Aaj bhi unhappy hone ka natak karogi? Did bhaijaan give you your surprise? Zoya stared at Najma in confusion while Asad just shook his head... "Uh...Najma you can see Asad too? "Of course...not that he's wearing an invisible robe she laughed it off turning to Asad, "bhaijaan, ammi is calling you, come soon...and Zoya, get ready and you too come out, it's late. Saying so Najma left and a silence hovers down on both of them when finally Zoya realized that this Asad was not a figment of her imagination but was actually the man himself. She widened her eyes at him and he started laughing again...  "Do I look like a ghost? he questions when she kept staring at him. "Oh wait it's you who look like one right now he said, moving close to her and fixing her hairs properly. Reality hit her and she replayed all the things he said and she said few minutes before. Her face surpassed every shade of red when she recalled him kissing her cheeks... "Raat mein aise mere room me mat aana, looking at you and these hairs like this I'd be so scared to death he chuckled, ruffling her hairs more again. "Huh...what did you just say? ASAD! she slammed her fist at his arms and he gets out of the bed. She hopped down after him and there starts a chase and run game between the two, like old times. After running for four more minutes both stopped breathing hard... "Ah! God Zoya, no more peaceful days for you, why did you come back? she fake scowled at him in dislike and he had to bite his lip from laughing... Is this the same girl who wanted so much to see him? "Accha? he neared her while she moved back and hit the wall. "Someone said she used to miss me while I was away. "w...who? she stuttered as he came dangerously close to her, her breathing faltered at his touch when he held her hand and threaded his fingers with hers. "Someone who is affected whenever I am this close... Someone who missed me but it would kill her ego to accept... Someone who looked so cute and peaceful in her beauty sleep this morning... He whispered as she dropped her gaze. She felt her knees going weak and held on to his right shoulder with her free hand... "Aur? She dared to open her mouth, but the word came out dry and foreign to her ears... "Aur, ...someone who is looking very pretty this morning, someone who didn't leave me alone even when I was far away, someone whom I love to tease, someone who is really close to me. Her eyes collided with his, as he stared deeply in hers with sincerity... "Aur? Her inaudible word was felt by him on his neck and he intensely held her gaze, "Aur...someone who stole my heart, someone I realized I'd manage till the end, someone whose absence I can't bear... Someone I have come to love so much... She stopped breathing at his words and he leans close to her ears, feeling her hand tighten the grip on his shoulder. "Now...do I control your breathes Zoya? He whispered in her ears and she saw red... He again faced her with a smirk, "Breathe She pushed him away frowning at the ground as she breathed in... it was like, he was opening that every knot of her heart and she came undone with his honest words... "Wapas chale gaye toh? He held her hand and placed it on her heart under his palm... "I know I have a place here, and I haven't come back to leave... Dheemi Dheemi aanch pe jese Dheere dheere jlta hai dil Ye bekaraari kyu hai Ye khumaari kyu hai Awaargi kyu hai Har mod par... She licked her lips accessing her inner thoughts and absorbing everything he said... Then he stepped back, his hand leaving hers and rubbing the back of his head shyly... "Asad!! they heard his ammi calling him and he shoved his hands in his pants pocket before walking out of her room, a smirk playing on his lips that she didn't fail to notice. After he disappeared from her sight she sat on the bed, her hand still placed on her heart where he oh so securely kept it. A blush crept on her face as she felt zillions of butterflies dancing in her stomach. Her grin grew wider in glee and she hugged the pillow lying back on the bed. She couldn't believe he was finally here... She was finally happy in a long time, her heart joyfully complete and jittery. His words swam in her mind all day long and she was lost in just watching him interact with his Ammi and sister. Now and then he shot her a knowing look with that smirk plastered on his face... After lunch when everyone went to sit in the hall, zoya was making custard in the kitchen. He pretended to look for something in the fridge. She turned and looked over her shoulder, focusing her eyes on his movements from under her lashes. When he turned around and caught her staring and she instantly turned back to cutting fruits. He walked to her and stood, supporting his back to the kitchen counter. "I spot some drool he said in a serious tone, thumbing her lower lip and then when her eyes widened on him he snorted. "YOU! she pointed the knife at him. "Woah! You can be daring too? You looked so innocent when you were staring he teased. "I wasn't..sta..staring. she muttered, failing to prevent the stutter. "Is that so? he kept his elbow on the counter, cupping his chin. His bright eyes mocked her and she turned away from him. "Can't you spend one moment without me? Always comes behind me to trouble she muttered. "ohho! Tum dono phir se start hogye? Dilshaad walked in on them shaking her head. "Phupi your son is just too much...I thought he will change into better but some people never change! glaring at him she walked out leaving the two in loads of laughter. Asad passed a smug look to his Ammi as she twisted his ears, "did you tell her? "Did, par guess samjhaana mushkil hai isey. He points his index finger to the side of his forehead and rolls it to express she's mad. Dilshaad gasped in mock anger and then narrowed her eyes at him, "Asad, stop teasing her. atleast give her the surprise c'mon she pushed him out of the kitchen and he went into his room to take out her surprise. Zoya felt the sofa deepen beside her and then she found herself sat thigh to thigh close with Asad. Before she could react or shift away he held her palm open and placed a big gift wrap in front of her. It was unexpectedly good for her so she just sat and stared... "ptch! Asad tutted and glanced at Dilshaad, "I told you she's crazy! "Gift wraps are supposed to be opened zoya. He turned his attention back to her and she slapped his hands away with a roll of her eyes. "Shut up! Najma giggled at this. Zoya was surprised would be an understatement. Asad had bought her favourite artist's famous painting. It was an original with his autograph. "Are you kidding me? she covered her mouth with her hands and hugged him in sheer happiness. She didn't need to say anything; he knew she had no words to express how grateful she was... His heart was contended that way. The evening passed by with some healthy fights between the two, but after Asad gave her the gift she sobered up to him so much that they actually were laughing together at something and not at each other. After a light dinner, Asad took all of them to their favourite Kulfi spot to keep intact their tradition. The setting was perfect for summers, with a lake alongside the sidewalk. They all were sitting on the chairs, facing the subtle waters of now the dark lake and enjoying the cool breezes. Asad was lost in zoya, as she stared at the moon, her chin turned upwards, a peaceful smile on her face. It filled his heart to the brim that it even hurt to keep staring at her. He was the most happiest person on this planet, having her sit beside him and devouring the Kulfi. He averted his eyes which were starting to get wet, he just felt so grateful towards life. Now he was back and he would start his business here only. That meant having zoya around him all the time. He sighed smiling up at her and found her already looking at him... Na mai apna raha... Na kisi aur kaa... Aisa mere khuda... Kyu hai...  Wo oh o...wo oh o...wo oh o... The moonlight was reflecting on her dark figure, her eyes shone with a tender yet faraway look... "Cheers! She brought her kulfi close to his and he chuckled nudging her kulfi with hers, "cheers! Do you remember? It was a humid day, and Asad was following an overexcited zoya to the kulfi stall. Najma had her board exams the next day so she was strictly off limits for going out. She was even warned to not eat kulfi by her ammi because she didn't want her to spoil her health in exam days. Reason being when Najma ate Kulfi she just didn't ate kulfi, she ate kulfis being a stress eater. But Asad and Zoya promised her to get only a single one for her secretly. They both were sat on the chairs facing the lake. Zoya thought it would be funny if she can find out how far she can throw the wooden sticks into the lake. So she started throwing the sticks which were littered all over the road by other customers. "Big time they all learn to use dustbins! she commented aiming for her third shot in the air. It flew up and just managed to fall at the starting wall of the lake. She pouted and he chuckled. "Really? And what are you doing? Spoiling the pleasant waters of the lake? he pointed to which she rolled her eyes. "Well, atleast they won't be visible! "That is if you manage to throw them far enough he laughed at her as again her throw just closely missed hitting the water tangling in the bushes surrounding it. "Oh really? Why don't you try then? she challenged him and being Asad he took challenge very seriously on his ego. So there they began picking the used kulfi sticks from the ground and throwing them in the lake. It was a pretty cool competition between the two until they were reprimanded by the Kulfiwala to not spoil the lake. They both ran from there into the next street laughing hard on their rebellious self. While walking back home, they feasted on their half melted kulfis... "You wanna try this Pista flavor? Asad offered her all of a sudden and she paused for a second before shrugging "okay. She licked his kulfi and he also tried to have some of her Rabdi kulfi but she didn't let him. "I have a rule with kulfis, no sharing! she shrugged and started walking ahead. He followed her raising his eyebrows with a naughty glint. "Well you're sharing your love, that should do for now. He said and then swiped his tongue on his kulfi, just where zoya licked. "What nonsense! she rolled her eyes at him. "Aur nahi to kya. Jhutha khaane se pyaar badhta hai, you know it don't you? he looked innocent but Zoya could see the imaginary devil ears on his head. "In your dreams she again rolled her eyes and made a face, "In our case it's not pyaar but hatred, wo bhi pure...bina milaavat They both chuckled, remembering the same incident and shared a good natured laugh. In their eye lock they didn't even realized when Najma and Dilshaad left. Dilshaad wanted to give them some time alone so that Asad could tell her his feelings. Asad and zoya looked around and spotted dilshaad and najma walking in a distance. They both started following them, walking side by side with the remaining kulfi. "So? he prompted. "So what? she asked out of habit. They've had this several times. "Wanna taste a different flavor? he smiled wholeheartedly at her and it was intoxicating to her that she returned it with all her heart. "Sure. She nodded and forwarded her kulfi towards him. He widened his eyes in surprise and exchanged kulfis with her. "What happened to your no sharing policy? "Maybe someone made me change it? it sounded like a question when she said it. "And might I ask who? he leaned his head closer to hers while she devoured the taste of his half eaten kulfi. She smiled, "Someone to whom it's tempting to eat a half eaten kulfi, someone who can't bear to spend a moment not troubling me, someone who needs to keep check of his over smartness. He started chukling and shook his head before looking at her intensely. "Aur? "Aur...someone who is damn infuriating, someone who enjoys teasing me, someone stood very close to me and looking like a fool she smirked and he narrowed his eyes on her before turning his attention to the kulfi as he ate it. "Aur? he aksed while swiping his lips with his tongue. "Someone who distracts me in odd times, someone I think I'd manage to live with till the end, someone who has stolen my heart and someone whom I have come to love so much. Hua nahi pehle kabhi yeh... Chuaa nahi dil ko kisi ne... Har aarzoo tu hi... Chain or sukoon tu hi... Mai toh kahoo... Tu hi hai zindagi... He was expecting her to twist the end playfully as shed normally do. But when she repeated his earlier words, he stopped walking. She smiled a shy smile and took her kulfi from him. Asad was mesmerized, but she walked ahead with both the kulfis in her hand. "c'mon! she laughed as she called him and he followed her and took back the kulfi from her. "hey! she tried blocking but he was fast. "What are we sharing today Zoya? he leaned in to whisper in her ears, his cool breathe making her shiver. "Answer me Zoya. What is it? Love or hate? She chinned up her head and looked straight in his eyes... "Love her tone was confident with finality. He grinned at her madly, impressed by her audacity. "With no milaavat "With no milaavat They both said together at the same time. He laughed and she affirmed with a smile and finishing off the kulfi and then dropping the stick to the ground, she kicked it off. He mimicked her actions and side hugged her as they walked to the house. "Thanks for the surprise Asad, I love it! she said when they reached home and were standing outside the gate. "What about my return gift? he winked and she narrowed her eyes...  "Ab kya chaiye? You finished most of my kulfi she rolled her eyes and he chuckled. Now they were back to being them. They both were incomplete without each other and they knew it. He pulled her close locking her one hand behind her so that she was pushed towards him till their breathes mingled. "Something sweet? his eyes danced happily as they took in every detail of her face shining in the moonlit veranda. "Pehle chodo... She pursed her lips, controlling her ragged breathes. "Bhaag gayi toh? With her free hand she placed his free hand on his heart and said, "I know I have a place here, and I haven't come here to leave. They both smile at each other and he loosened his grip on hers. She quickly raised herself on her knees and pretends to peck on his cheek, but when his hands are completely on his side, she made a quick move and runs away... Na mai apna raha... Na kisi aur ka... Aisa mere khuda Kyu hai..  Wo oh o...wo oh o...wo oh o... She escapes into the house giggling and it's too late for him to register she just tricked him... He followed close and their chase and run game goes on which might have fooled Najma, but the smiles on their faces told Dilshaad about the flow of this positive energy called love between the two... "Not fair Zoya... You will have to pay for this... He warned following her as she rushed out of the house and again peeped in holding the door ajar... "Everything is fair in love and war... She whispered with a naughty glint in her eyes and before he reached to her the door closed and he could hear her as she shouted wishing a good night to Dilshad and Najma... He shook his head before walking back to his room... His heart was swelling with contentment as he lied down on his bed reminiscing that everything happened in a whole day... 'Love...with no milavat...' those were the words in his mind as he slowly drifted into the peaceful sleep with that small smile intact on his face... While on the other side sleep was far away for Zoya as she was still feeling this everything as a dream... Just till last night she was missing him so much and imagining him nice and sweet to her in her dreams only... But now he was back for good... And had he really said all that to her...? It was still like a dream to her... She sighed caressing the gift... "Hehhh...It was too much to believe... His each word kept ringing in her mind and she felt her eyes welled up feeling emotional suddenly...  "Today you gave me everything Asad... She breathed hugging the painting to her heart... "Don't I deserve a return gift then? She shook her head smiling as she could see him leaning back to the door... "Yes...You deserve... She hopped out of the bed and opening the door of her room walked out of her house... Taking a look around she moved to his window... For a moment she just stood watching him sleeping peacefully but then frowned, "Meri neend uda kar tum aise araam se so rahe ho like nothing has happened...how could you? "You like to tease me anyways...that is not going to change... She shook her head and very carefully entered inside his room... Sitting beside him she stared at him for sometime feared thinking she would touch him and he will disappear as he used to be... "Still it feels like a dream... She touched his soft hair falling on his forehead before leaning to kiss him on his cheek... "Your return gift... She smiled as her lips touched his cheek and before she knew it his hand wrapped around her seizing her and she gasped... "It's not a dream and you should start believing it... He whispered as he caressed the side of her face with his free hand sending chills down her spine... and she closed her eyes drinking in the feel of his touch... He smiled and flipped them so she landed on her back with him hovering over... His breathe fanned on her face and he traced the side of her lips... "Or it's better to make you believe Zoya... His voice thick as he whispered and his lips brushed against hers... He felt himself captive feeling the soft texture of her lips that he had dreamed of countless times... Her hand moved to his shoulder and gripped him tight as he placed a sweet tender kiss to which she began responding giving in... But half a minute of her responding, and he pulled away staring at her amusedly... "Can you believe it now... He asked moving back & she inhaled before her eyes met with his... He winked and she pushed him off... He laughed lying on the bed and his fingers gripped her wrist as she tried to get up... "I would love if you keep dreaming though...  He eyes danced with playfulness... Grabbing a pillow with her free hand she threw it on his face making him laugh hard... And as his grip loosened on her wrist she hopped out... Her gaze fixed on him as she moved back to the window... He stopped laughing as he watched her getting out... "I don't want to dream anymore..."    He heard her whisper and getting out of the bed walked towards his room window... outside where she was standing and held her hand, "Dream Zoya... I'll make your every dream come true..." She still stood as she did, her back facing him and he back hugged her from inside the window... "We'll together make our reality better than the dreams even, haina? As he said that she smiled a huge smile which he couldn't see but felt... "Hmm..." They both smiled and watch the moon, with thousands of stars merrily winking at them from the summer sky... They all were witnesses of them loving each other with a love that was more than love... Har aarzoo tu hai... Chain or sukoon tu hai... Mai toh kahoo... Tu hi hai zindagi...!!! ---  ---

http://jodifiction.blogspot.com/2020/05/asya-ss-tu-hi-tu-qubool-hai-surbhi.html

[tellytantra]

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Scene 1Pragati tells people that Sukaniya didnt want us to see what was inside memory card and thats why she destroyed it. Singhania says you dont have any standard, how dare you taunt my daughter? He is about to slap her but Raghbir stops him and says why angry? marriage happened and she helped me. Singhania says this is an insult. Raghbir thanks Pragati and says to Singhania that you cant do anything now. Singhania says to Sukaniya that lets leave, they leave. Raghbir says to Pragati that you will get promotion, you can leave now. Pragati is in tears. She gets Arshi’s call, friend says where are you? uncle is back because of police, youa re fine? Pragati says I am coming back soon, she ends call. Raghbir’s mother says we know your plan, we dont accept this marriage. Devraj says to Pragati that marriage and now you are our daughter in law, I think Sukaniya was lying all this time. Mother angrily leaves. Sukaniya is angry and says how dare that girl come there? Manager says I did everything you said. Sukaniya says I wont spare her. Manager says you will get any guy. Sukaniya says I want to teach him a lesson. Pragati’s father shouts at Pragati that you got married to your boss? Pragati says nothing happened, he cries and says I always asked you to keep work away from life, why you worried about his life? let him do what he wants. Pragati cries. He says you married your boss, nobody will understand you didnt want to marry him, all will call you gold digger, they will all taunt me, he coughs and falls down. Pragati gives him water and cries. She leaves from there. Scene 2Family tells Raghbir that he is married. Raghbir says she left from here. Devraj says you did all rituals. Raghbir says am I some luggage that everyone wants to take me away? I love a woman and you have made fun of me, I loved Bani but you people keep bringing girls for me to marry, stop making fun of my love, I wanted to die but you people just want me to marry? thats why I loved Bani because nobody loves me here. He leaves from there. Raghbir comes to him room and sings kiya hua tera waada. He imagines Bani smiling at him. She says you left your wife? Raghbir hugs her and says I missed you. Pragati says sir what are you doing? He sees that its Pragati. Pragati says I cant go home now. Raghbir says no and goes to sleep. Nakul tells family that Pragati is in Raghbir’s room. Raghbir’s mom Aditi says I wont spare that gold digger girl. Raghbi is murmuring Bani and hugs her photo. Pragati sits beside him and takes off his shoes as he goes to sleep. She wipes his face and tucks him in bed. Pragati says I never thought my first married night would be like and the one I married would someone else so much. Prashant sees news of Pragati marrying Raghbir. Sanket says what is all this? Prashant says Sukaniya didnt let anyone know why she was marrying Raghbir, Pragati got caught in all this. Sukaniya wanted to know something from Raghbir thats why she was marrying Raghbir, its said that Bani’s voices are still heard in that house, Sukaniya wanted to know truth about Bani’s soul, game is changed now, bad will look good and good would look bad now. Pragati caresses Raghbir’s head and looks at his and Bani’s photo. Bani’s silhouette is shown glaring at her. PRECAP- Raghbir says I dont accept this marriage. Pragati says this relation is a no relation, its a compromise. Update Credit to: Atiba

http://cattybilli.blogspot.com/2019/06/bepanah-pyaar-14th-june-2019-written.html