#i need to stop using my tumblr as a diary

[love-me-satoru]

really need new internet friends who would love to trauma dump with me.

i also really feel like i need to talk to someone to get clean and i don’t know if ill actually follow through

or might just end it all.

my birthday is literally this saturday. But i don’t even feel like i deserve any sort of happiness since i keep lying about my recovery.

Also i haven’t eaten a meal since friday. lost 7 pounds since then. i’ve always wanted to lose weight. i just didn’t expect it to be a very dangerous way.

[g0thsoojin]

🦴

[dogbunni]

[lesbianwithchainsaws]

I want to quit my job so badly, but idk what else to do. I hate it here

[kirbyddd]

saw a video with tips on surviving falling through ice labeled "absolutely vital information for people living in areas that freeze over"

like... do they think people just accidentally wander onto frozen ponds and lakes?

[n--n]

I had a really great time going out to dinner with my mom and nana tonight at a nice restaurant but nana believes in conspiracy theories and my mom and I have to keep debunking the bs sources she pulls out in a joking way to keep her from getting too defensive about how we don’t agree and I’m so tired. God fucking help me.

And then they’re like. Both loudly and condescendingly agreed about the whole “men and women can’t be friends” thing and that men and women have completely different brains/ in general most men are waiting to fuck you instead of genuinely caring about you as a person (and they did that FUCKING CONDESCENDING exaggerated laugh w/ eachother over it. I know most men have misogyny and treat women badly. And that they talk about us differently behind our backs. No fucking shit. But it’s not everyone, and believing so stringently that it’s impossible to have a true genuine friendship without either wanting to fuck eachother annoys and hurts me. How can we ever move forward to a less misogynistic world if we ourselves refuse to build real friendships with the opposite sex regardless of gender.) and frankly that kicked the Gender Issues bruise in my heart and I just Was Not Having It at the end of the night

[toastsnaffler]

biting my tongue to not share my opinions on the character body types in bg3 😐

[dykeofmisfortune]

dear diary

today i had a wattpadesque coffee shop au moment. int. nyc "cheap" coffeehouse where a cappucino is over $5 (it shouldn't be like that): i had a crush a month ago on this hot butch lesbian who i really clicked with upon meeting; we both bonded over being coffeeholics (caffine addiction) and mentioned that we both went to the same coffee shop to get work done. stupidly and dumbly i asked her out (my friends said that allegedly lesbians should go for it instead of omg ur so pretty, plus i thought we were flirting) welllll i got rejected LOL but that was two weeks ago and im ok now. anyways i went to the coffeeshop today and i had only been there once or twice but i decided to go there on impulse.

well it turns out she was there and i sat directly behind her before i recognized her. then i panicked and scrambled and went to a dark corner where i could see her and she couldnt see me and i was panicking.

backstory: yesterday i went to an art museum alone and it was depressing bc i had to look at all these couples on dates. a month ago though i went to a ball (karaoke event) and there was this girl who was an art history major and i was like OMG. SICK. and she was so nice and we connected almost instantly and bonded over not knowing any other art history people, but i forgot to get her socials and we never saw each other again because she had to leave the ball (karaoke) early. i was randomly thinking about her yesterday at the museum bc i kept seeing kandinsky paintings and had no one to be like OMG. LOOK ITS A KANDINSKY PAINTING with. remember this girl whose name i didn't even remember and who i danced with at a ball (sung creep by radiohead at karaoke) and thought i'd never see again i randomly started thinking abt her

ANYWAYS SHE LITERALLY CAME INTO THE SAME COFFEESHOP AS I WAS FREAKING OUT OVER THE GIRL WHO REJECTED ME AND I ACCIDENTALLY ASKED ART HISTORY MAJOR GIRL FOR HER NUMBER AND SAID THAT WE SHOULD VISIT A MUSEUM TOGETHER AND ALMOST MENTIONED THAT I WAS THINKING ABT HER LMAOOOOO WHILE I WAS HIGH ON ANXIETY AND CAFFINE im insane

and i kept glancing at the girl who rejected me half to see if she's looking at me bc i didn't want her to, but also half to see if she's looking at me bc i lowkey wanted her to. but then the art history major looked back bc i kept looking there so i must've been doing it too often. but AGHUDHGSIHGS this is literally not a big deal but ahhsdhfhsdhgfs

[idiaa-shroxd]

HEY HELLO I LOVE YOUR WRITING SM I'M SO JELOUS MARRY ME???/j

awww thank you so so much!! 💗💞 I absolutely would marry you (*´∀｀*) i hope you don’t mind but i checked out your blog aesthetic is literally so pretty?? i’m very jealous of people who know how to make a pretty profile!!! i adore the color it’s so pleasing to the eyes!! i also checked your writing and it’s very nice!! it’s easy to read and understand and i also respect the first post being one about deuce! <3

i also really love the genshin emotes, makes me happy to see another fan ehe so here’s one in response, as faruzan’s got to basically be my main besides wanderer because i adore her so much?? play style is absolutely fun despite only being c4 i crowned her. my wanderer is like triple crowned and has cons with a BIS but I still love faruzan so much—. she’s literally so cute!! (´・ω・)

[blackstafftower]

chilling. chilling. having fun. (hit with a blast of a childhood memory /neg) . [half life scientist noise]

[certhioidea]

.

[katsy-kitty]

holy shit I just did so much cleaning

I know my body will hate me tomorrow

I'll probably have to do heavy resting for the next few days

but I'm also proud of myself

but I have also entered my verbose era

and I don't know how to stop

it's 3:30 am and I'm still so hyper

if I don't fall asleep again, it's gonna be a bit of a problem

I don't like these insomnia bouts

[beeslut69]

vent! Don't read if we're irls and you don't wanna see it

doing shit and hanging out with people that make me uncomfortable for the sake of keeping peace and then wondering why I constantly feel uncomfortable

[moontropy]

tags rambling

[scarletcomet]

i hate when people ask you what you want to do in the future or tell you need to do something

[missshame]

Still learning to drive and already having my first car accident 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡