#i promise this is my last spop post for a while i just have complicated feelings about it

[faelapis]

so... i’ve seen a lot of fanart and meta talking about adora having this subversive arc learning to be selfish, and i can’t really agree. 

i get the desire for that, but that is... not what happens. she has a typical insecure hero arc, it just comes with a reward attached. catra nominally acts like adora shouldn’t have to do this, but nothing really comes of that.

adora a) does the selfless hero thing, and b) it’s the right thing to do, with no negative consequences. she survives, gets her cake and eats it too... and that’s a narrative reward for being selfless. she still has to do the hero thing, or everyone dies. it’s more a reminder that other people care about her than any internal arc about selfishness.

what it reminds me of more than anything is when moana’s grandma reminds her that she shouldn’t be under so much pressure. that, too, is not an arc about selfishness. it’s just a small reminder to the kiddos at home that they matter.

and that’s fine! it’s a good message. but it’s not an an elaborate theme. moana still  has to be the selfless hero, or, well, everyone dies, so she can’t choose differently - they would never dare show that. like adora, she doubts herself and can be self-sacrificing, but nothing comes of it. she’s rewarded for being selfless, because being a hero just leads to things... working out. it’s what both needed to be, while being vaguely reminded of their own feelings along the way.

it just feels like a theme because they say it several times, but it does nothing to challenge the typical hero narrative. adora never makes a choice to be selfish, nor is that portrayed as something she should do. adora doing the hero thing is... necessary and praised, in the end. she fixes everything, carrying catra like a prize. it’s sad that it makes her feel pressured, but just kinda sad. not sad enough to change the story. she-ra just activates in time so she can survive, yay for her - but that is, narratively speaking, still rewarding heroic self-sacrifice.

the only modern animation i can think of that actually show and organically build selfishness as a virtue (and selflessness as a double-edged sword with consequences both for yourself and others) is still steven universe, sorry. especially pearl and steven’s arcs. because they’re not just reminders that “you matter, too!” in such a shallow way.

their self-sacrificing actually tears on their psyche in toxic ways and has negative consequences. it is something that needs to end in order for things to get better for them and the world. their dismissal of their own emotions and romanticizing yourself as a hero are actual character flaws, developed over time in ways that leads them to some truly horrifying places when they have their own agency. that needs to be addressed in order for them to grow.

pearl spreads her toxic selflessness to others and only becomes her best self when she starts living for herself, and steven putting himself on such a high pedestal to “fix” everyone both literally and symbolically turn him into a monster. he had to leave - even when others wants him to stay - in order to work on himself, both freeing himself from the toxic purpose of being everyone’s savior and freeing others from depending on him.

that’s selfishness as a value. those are characters who, to me, not only struggle to care about themselves, but where that actually manifests in a character arc.

it’s a consistent theme in SU - not only affecting the ego, but forcing you to confront the terrifying question of who you are without selfless purpose, which may frighten you, because no authority exists to give you a destiny (hey parallel to literally every gem!). everyone from white diamond to jasper are “at their worst” when they think they’re being completely selfless. not because a meaningless life of selfishness is a perfect solution, but because you have to care about yourself. the community has to mutually look out for one another. we can’t put anyone on a pedestal of heroism - that’s what steven and white have in common. it’s scary to live without that selfless purpose, but it’s necessary. 

they basically have to face the absurd and live with it. adora never has to do any of that, she just gets a kitty gf reward for being a hero.

i’m not saying this because i think adora is a bad character or inherently lesser, but i think her arc just... isn’t about selfishness. i think it’s a story of an insecure hero - like moana - who it’s nice to remind that they matter, but that’s all it is. a nice little reminder, in the middle of a fairly conventional hero story. they get to have a happy ending because they’re selflessly heroic, and the proposed negative consequencs of that heroism never manifests. it’s fine.

it’s just not as subversive as i would personally like, but... i don’t think spop was designed to really be subversive or challenging. not everything is. i think it was designed to have its hero acknowledge her own feelings, sure, but it’s first and foremost a power fantasy space adventure with feels and lesbians. and that’s fine. that’s all it needs to be! i don’t say this as a criticism exactly, i say it because i don’t want us to have such a shallow conception of selfishness.

i’ll confess i’m generally not a fan of spop’s plot, but i do like the characters. i’m also amazed the most generic sci-fi bad guy in the history of generic sci-fi bad guys doing a very basic "u should conform" thing is seen by some as The Most Biting Critique of Homophobia Ever, as if "break free from the machiNE" wasn’t a literal apple commercial.

but i digress - i do like adora. i just don’t think the plot is about her “learning to be selfish.” wrong hordak is closer to that, but his existential crisis is more of a background gag, so that doesn’t count. it just leads to where it’s most convenient for it to lead; being over in ten seconds and resulting in being angry with those who hurt you, who only seem to exist for you to Stand Up to Them (tm). spop in general really likes enabling the power fantasy of being better and stronger than those who hurt you, without always earning it. but, again, i digress.

i think my issue is that spop is "deep" for people who think everything they relate to is deep. it’s a cookie-cutter story told in a typical way, it just has insecure lesbians in it. it’s... fine. it’s a marvel movie with feels, but you’re allowed to relate to that. it doesnt have a consistent philosophy or interrogate its own positions on themes like abuse or repression in novel ways, but it doesn’t need to. it just does the insecure hero vs antihero thing in an okay way. 

catra is your basic cassandra zuko AMEM (abused manipulated edgy minion) character who gets help because she’s sad and isn’t “as bad” as the main villain. that’s also fine. i don’t love the execution, i wish it didn’t result in suddenly declawing her personality and stripping her of all need for agency, but whatever. she’s also rewarded for being selfless, not selfish, btw.

i actually do like spop. it’s messy and the plot is thinner than the fandom would ever admit, but, well... it’s still fine. in fact, i think it’s IMPORTANT that lgbt+ people have more basic self-empowerment stories that aren’t as challenging or, frankly, as messed up as your utenas or stephen’s universities. kinda like how every minority story doesn’t need to be “deep”, sometimes you just need to turn crazy rich asians on and have fun with it.

i just want to embrace it for what it is, not what the fandom acts like it is. that’s all.