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wasabidottie · 26 days

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The man in the yankees cap part 3

Later that night, after the buzz of your day together had settled, your phone buzzed on your nightstand. You picked it up, heart skipping a beat when you saw the notification.

Schlatt: So, I’ve been thinkin’… You’re gonna be bored tomorrow

You smirked, already typing back.

You: bored? why? you planning on being somewhere else?

Schlatt: Nah, just sayin After hangin out with me, everything else is gonna be a letdown It’s a known fact

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t stop the grin forming.

You: bold of you to assume I’m not already bored talking to you

It took a few moments before his next message popped up, and when it did, you could practically hear the tone behind it.

Schlatt: Cute. Real cute But we both know you had fun today Otherwise, you wouldn’t still be textin me

You roll your eyes, his confidence both irritating and endearing.

You: maybe i just feel bad for you

Schlatt: You? Feeling bad for me? Sweetheart, I’m doin just fine In fact, I’m about to make your night a lot more interesting

Your eyebrows shot up, intrigued but cautious. You typed back quickly.

You: oh yea? hows that?

Schlatt: Easy I’m takin’ you out tomorrow. For real this time None of this ‘hanging out’ bullshit An actual date

Your fingers hovered over the keyboard, heart speeding up as you re-read his message. Was he serious? Of course, with Schlatt, you could never tell. Half the time he was sarcastic and the other half… well, maybe this was one of those rare moments where he wasn’t messing around.

You: is this part of the long con? because if it is, ur doing great

Schlatt: Nah, I’m serious I’m asking you out, right here What’s it gonna take? You want me to beg or somethin? Maybe get down on one knee? I can send a picture for proof

You laughed out loud at that, covering your face with your hand. There he was again, walking that fine line between teasing and genuinely trying.

You: a picture, huh? now that would be something but no need for the theatrics i might be free tomorrow

Schlatt: Might be? Don’t make me drag you outta the house. Or worse... I could just show up and knock on your door

You grinned, already picturing his smug face.

You: is that supposed to be a threat? because it sounds kinda stalker-ish.

Schlatt: I call it persistence You’d be impressed by my dedication

You: right, right totally impressed i bet you do this with all the girls

Schlatt: Nah. Just the ones who can handle my bad jokes and still wanna see me the next day

Your heart fluttered a bit at that one. He might be cocky, but damn if he didn’t know how to slip in those lines at just the right moment.

You: fine, i’ll go out with you but you better bring your a-game

Schlatt: Oh sweetheart, you haven’t even seen my B-game yet Tomorrow, 7 Dress nice

You: How original

Schlatt: See ya tomorrow, 7 sharp And don’t be late I’ll know.

You stared at the screen, feeling a mix of excitement and amusement. Even through text, his brash attitude came through so clearly, but there was something beneath it all—a softness he didn’t let show for long.

The next day rolled around faster than expected, and at exactly 6:59, your phone buzzed.

Schlatt: Tick tock, sweetheart

You chuckled, having just pulled into the parking lot. You texted him back quickly.

You: relax. i’m on time you worried i’m gonna stand you up?

Schlatt: Wouldn’t blame ya But I’d track ya down eventually I got resources

You: i’m almost afraid to ask what that means. but I’m ready whats the plan?

There was a pause before he responded.

Schlatt: Not tellin but I promise you’ll have fun and I never break a promise

You grabbed your jacket and headed out the door, your heart doing a little flip. You hadn’t realized how much you were looking forward to this until now.

When you finally met up with him, standing outside a dimly lit restaurant with his signature smug grin, you couldn't help but laugh. "So, where are you taking me?"

“Patience, sweetheart. You’re in for a surprise,” he said, flashing you that cocky grin.

As you both walked inside, the smell of food hit you immediately, and you raised an eyebrow. "So, no wild, elaborate plan, huh?"

“Hey, I’m a man of simple tastes,” he replied, holding the door for you with a small nod. “Besides, I figured I’d keep it easy, so I don’t scare you off on the first date.”

You snorted. “Oh, please. You’re doing that just fine without the fancy stuff.”

“Ah, there it is,” he chuckled. “Already tryin’ to roast me, huh? You’ve got guts.”

“I learned from the best,” you said, your eyes glinting as you gave him a playful nudge.

He laughed again, shaking his head as he led you to a table. "See, this is why I knew we’d get along. You don’t take my shit."

"You say that like it’s a good thing,” you teased.

“It is,” he said, his voice suddenly softer as he looked at you. “I’m serious, though. I don’t usually do this kind of stuff.”

You arched a brow. “What, ask people out?”

“Yeah, not like this. I don’t usually… care as much.” He cleared his throat, quickly slipping back into his familiar tone. “But, uh, don’t let that go to your head.”

You grinned, feeling your cheeks heat up slightly. “Too late.”

Schlatt groaned dramatically, putting a hand over his eyes. “God, you’re impossible.”

“Yet here you are, sitting across from me,” you pointed out, leaning back in your chair. “So who’s the real winner?”

He peeked through his fingers, smirking. “Fine. You got me. But don’t think I’m gonna go easy on you just ‘cause I like your company.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” you replied, your voice laced with sarcasm.

“Good,” he said, leaning forward slightly. “Because I plan on keeping you on your toes.”

---

The restaurant was cozy, with low lighting and the soft hum of conversations surrounding you. It was a surprisingly intimate setting, one you hadn’t expected from Schlatt. But then again, you were learning that he had layers—layers he didn’t let people see too often.

As you both sat down, you couldn’t help but notice that he wasn’t wearing his usual Yankees cap. His brown hair, usually hidden, was tousled but still had that effortless look. It made him seem a little more… approachable, in a way.

Schlatt caught you staring and raised an eyebrow. “What? Somethin’ on my face?”

You quickly shook your head, a smile tugging at your lips. “No, just… you look different without the hat.”

He smirked, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, figured I’d class it up a bit for you. Didn’t want you thinkin’ I was some kinda slob.”

You laughed softly. “Right, because the hat is what would’ve done that.”

He chuckled, shaking his head. “You’re a real piece of work, y’know that?”

The conversation between you felt natural, but there was a shift in the air—something more serious lingering beneath the surface. It was in the way he looked at you, his eyes lingering a little longer than usual, and the way his smile softened just a bit more.

“So,” he said, leaning back in his chair and giving you a once-over that made your heart skip a beat, “I gotta say, you clean up real nice.”

You felt heat rise to your cheeks, his gaze both flattering and a little unnerving. “Thanks. You don’t look too bad yourself.”

“Damn right,” he replied with a grin, but then his expression turned a bit more sincere. “Nah, seriously. You… you look good tonight. Real good.”

There was something in the way he said it—raw, almost like he wasn’t used to giving compliments, but felt compelled to anyway. It made your heart race, but in a way that left you wanting more.

You cleared your throat, trying to keep things light. “I should be saying that to you. You’re the one who took the hat off.”

He smirked, shrugging. “Yeah, well, don’t get used to it. This is a special occasion.”

“Oh, so I’m special now?” you teased, leaning in slightly.

He held your gaze, his smirk fading into something more serious. “Yeah, you are.”

The words hung in the air between you, and for a moment, you weren’t sure how to respond. There was a vulnerability in his eyes that you hadn’t seen before—a crack in his usual tough exterior.

“Well,” you finally said, your voice a little softer, “I’m glad you think so.”

He nodded, his hand drumming lightly on the table as if he were trying to shake off the intensity of the moment. “Yeah, yeah, whatever”

You laughed, but the warmth in your chest didn’t fade. It was strange how quickly you’d grown comfortable with him, how easily you fell into this rhythm. But there was also an excitement, a thrill in not knowing what would happen next.

As the night went on, the conversation flowed easily between you. Schlatt kept the jokes coming, but there was a tenderness in his tone that hadn’t been there before. He asked about your interests, your dreams, and even though he tried to hide it, you could tell he was genuinely curious.

At one point, you mentioned a hobby you were passionate about, and he leaned in, listening intently. “That’s pretty cool,” he said, surprising you with his sincerity. “Didn’t take you for the type.”

You tilted your head, curious. “What type did you take me for?”

He shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. “I dunno. But I like that you keep me guessin’. Keeps things interesting.”

You smiled back, feeling a warmth spread through you. “You’re not so bad at keeping things interesting yourself.”

The night was winding down, and as you both left the restaurant, you couldn’t help but feel a little sad that it was over. But there was also a sense of anticipation, knowing that this wouldn’t be the last time you saw him.

As you walked down the street, the cool night air brushing against your skin, Schlatt turned to you, his expression more serious than it had been all night.

“Hey,” he said, his voice a little gruffer, “I had a good time tonight. Better than I thought I would.”

You smiled, feeling your heart swell. “Me too. I’m glad we did this.”

He nodded, his gaze dropping to the ground for a moment before meeting yours again. “So, uh… we should do it again sometime.”

There was a hint of uncertainty in his voice, as if he wasn’t used to putting himself out there like this. It made you like him even more.

“I’d like that,” you replied softly.

He grinned, relief flashing across his face. “Good. ‘Cause I’m not done with you yet.”

You laughed, shaking your head. “You’re impossible.”

“And you like it,” he shot back, a teasing glint in his eyes.

You didn’t deny it. Instead, you just smiled, knowing that this was just the beginning of something that neither of you had expected but were both eager to explore.

---

As you both approached your front door, the quiet of the night settled in around you. The soft buzz of the evening had dulled, and now it was just you, Schlatt, and the gentle rhythm of your footsteps. He’d walked beside you, hands stuffed in his pockets, the usual bravado seemingly softened by the evening you’d spent together.

When you finally reached your doorstep, you turned to him with a smile that felt a little heavier than usual. Maybe it was because the night was ending, or maybe it was because you weren’t sure what would happen next.

“Thanks for tonight,” you said softly. “I had a really good time.”

Schlatt grunted, looking down at the ground for a moment before meeting your eyes. “Yeah, me too. It was… better than I expected.”

There was a flicker of something behind his words—something hesitant, like he was holding back. You could see it in the way his jaw clenched slightly, his eyes darting to your lips and then away just as quickly.

He didn’t want to leave. You could feel it, and the funny thing was, you didn’t want him to go either.

“Guess I’ll see you around,” you said, your voice softer now, the words laced with an unspoken question.

Schlatt nodded, his lips parting like he wanted to say something more, but nothing came out. You gave him a final smile before turning to unlock your door. The click of the lock seemed louder than it should have been, the finality of it making your chest tighten.

As you stepped inside, you couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of disappointment. Something was missing. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but there was a lingering tension—something unresolved.

Schlatt stood there, watching the door close, his mind racing. He cursed under his breath, hating himself for letting the moment slip by. He should’ve kissed you. He should’ve done something. But instead, he stood there like an idiot, just watching you go.

“Goddammit,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair in frustration. What the hell was wrong with him? It wasn’t like he hadn’t done this before. He’d been on dates, kissed girls, but this… this was different. You were different.

The way you looked at him, the way you laughed at his stupid jokes—there was something about you that had him all twisted up inside. He wasn’t used to feeling like this, wasn’t used to giving a damn about what happened next.

But right now, all he could think about was the fact that he hadn’t kissed you, and it was eating him alive.

He stood there for a moment longer, debating with himself. Should he just leave? Chalk it up to nerves and move on? No. No, he couldn’t do that. Not this time.

Before he could stop himself, he turned and banged on your door, his heart pounding in his chest. The sound echoed in the quiet night, and for a second, he wondered if he’d gone too far, if he’d screwed up even more by coming back.

But then the door opened, and there you were, looking at him with a mix of surprise and curiosity.

“Schlatt?” you asked, your voice filled with confusion. “What’s going on?”

He stood there, looking a little wild-eyed, but there was determination in his expression now—like he’d made up his mind and wasn’t going to back down.

“There’s somethin’ I need to do,” he said, his voice rough but steady.

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden intensity in his gaze. “What do you mean?”

He took a step forward, his hand reaching out, hovering just near your arm. “I’m askin’ permission. Before I do it.”

You frowned, trying to piece together what he was talking about. But then, as his eyes darted from your lips to your eyes, realization hit you like a freight train.

“Oh,” you breathed, your heart skipping a beat.

He swallowed hard, his voice lower now, almost vulnerable. “Can I kiss you?”

For a second, you couldn’t find the words, the intensity of the moment catching you off guard. But then you nodded, your voice barely above a whisper. “Yeah. Yeah, you can.”

Schlatt didn’t hesitate after that. He closed the distance between you, his hands gently cupping your face as his lips met yours in a kiss that was both bold and soft, a contradiction that somehow made perfect sense with him. There was a rawness to it, a need that he hadn’t shown before, but beneath that, there was a softness—an unspoken promise that this wasn’t just a moment. It was something more.

His hands, large and warm, cradled your face with surprising tenderness, his lips pressing against yours in a way that made your heart race. It wasn’t hurried or rushed; it was careful, like he was savoring every second, every breath.

When he finally pulled back, he kept his forehead against yours, his breath heavy and uneven. He opened his eyes slowly, his gaze locking onto yours.

“That was overdue,” he said, his voice a little raspy.

You couldn’t help but laugh softly, your heart still pounding in your chest. “Yeah, it was.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the quiet night wrapping around you like a blanket. But then Schlatt grinned, that familiar teasing glint returning to his eyes.

“So… you think that was any good?” he asked, his tone light, but there was a hint of real concern behind the joke.

You smiled, reaching up to run a hand through his messy brown hair. “Better than I expected," you said mirroring his words from before.

He chuckled, pulling you close again for another kiss, this time more confident, more sure of himself. And as his arms wrapped around you, holding you tight, you realized that this was just the beginning of something you hadn’t expected but now couldn’t imagine going without.

And maybe—just maybe—Schlatt was thinking the exact same thing.

#jschlatt x reader #schlatt x reader #jschlatt #schlatt #jschlatt x you #chuckle sandwich x reader #schlatt x you

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weepingwillowwonder · 2 months

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#7 Hazbin Hotel "Things I ✨️LOVE✨️ the idea of..." (because I can't share these things with people irl...)

CW: Suggestive content, Cursing

The prompt for this is:

Reader - "I'm gonna fuck them up 🤬"

Them - "Excuse me. What did you just say?"

Reader - "...I said I want to fuck you 😘😅"

Pt. 1 with none other than Valentino 😈

---

Walking into Valentino's studio, you were fully expecting to have him drag you into his office after seeing your newest outfit, curtesy of Velvette herself. Your skimpy clothes left nothing to the imagination, turning heads your entire walk over. Glancing at your phone, you open your messages to Valentino's contact, re-reading the message he sent you earlier - 'When you're done with Vel, come see me 😘'

Once you enter the studio, you very quickly realize you don't see or hear Valentino. Frowning you spot Angel taking a break nearby and give him a shy wave "Hey Angie.."

He smiles when he sees you and opens his arms for a hug. "Heya doll!" He smirks, pausing to check you out with his hands on your shoulders, "Daaamn, aren't you lookin' good today? What's the occasion?" You roll your eyes, trying to hide the warming of your cheeks, "Have you seen Val? He asked me to come by earlier..."

Angel looks away and awkwardly scratches the back of his head with a free hand, "I uh...I'm not too sure...Last I heard he wanted to take 30. Said something about wanting to blow off some steam..."

Your eyes narrow at his suspicious reaction, "Blow off some steam? Was he..." you pout disappointedly, "Was he with someone else?" Angel sighs and drops his hands from your shoulders, "Listen, I dunno if you wanna-" You hands clench at yourself sides, getting pissed off. Why would he tell you to come find him only to be drawn off somewhere else, WITH someone else?

"Angel Dust. Was. He. With. Someone. Else?" You grit out. Angel raises his hands in surrender, "okay okay! Sheesh! I saw him leavin' with Tiffany, I dunno if they went back to his office or not, just that they were talkin' , that's all!" You scoff in disbelief, mumbling "I can't believe him." You turn back to Angel, pointing at him, "Imma fuck Val up for this shit, I swear to-"

A smooth voice speaks behind you, startling both you and Angel, "Excuse me. What did you say?" You turn around, mouth open in mid-sentence, now pointing at nothing. Valentino stood in front of you with his arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.

"I-I said I wanna fuck you~" You quickly respond, tilting your head cutely. You hesitantly approach him, hoping that he'll completely ignore your comment and take the bait instead. "I got all dressed up for you...Vel said you would like it..." you say softly, holding onto his arms. Angel quietly snickers behind you as you look up at Valentino. He lifts your chin with a finger and takes his time taking a puff of his cigarette, then blowing the smoke in your face. You don't dare to move, forcing down the need to cough.

He regards you silently for another moment before speaking in a low, dangerous voice, "That's what I thought." He then motions his cigarette to the direction of the door, purring, "Go wait for me in my office, cariño. I'd like to take a good look at you in there~" You nod and give him a quiet 'yes sir' before he slaps your ass, making you scurry to do what you're told.

#hasbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hotel hasbin #hazbin hotel the vees #hasbin angel dust #hasbin valentino #hotel hasbin valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #valentino x reader #valentino imagines

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wheresmymilliondollarman · 1 year

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aaron warner x ferrars! reader pt. 3

when omega point falls, you find yourself in need of the supreme commander's son, and discover unresolved feelings along the way.

(taken place during ignite me & hc continuation from part two)

that is literally me in this gif y'all🖤🖤

a/n: hello!! finally back with part 3. i'm sorry for the wait, i wanted to do other requests, but tbh i might focus on this little series so that way it's complete and everyone can read it all together. also idk why i even label it hcs anymore LMAOO like i feel it's progressed to a fic atp, but i'm too stubborn to change my format and titles, so humor me LOL. (maybe i'll turn this into a legit fic when i finish, who knows) pls do not kill me for not including every detail, i tried to highlight the best parts as much as i could. also might seem all sunshine rainbows rn with relationships, but just wait for the next book… 🤞 extra info: kinda change adam's character cus i feel like he was an extra ass at times for no reason in the book?? like trying to kill kenji for no reason?? small redemption arc. kinda slight change to juliette. also, i love making reader, juliette, and kenji a lil trio.

word count: 10.7k (im insane)

warnings: mentions of fights, blood, injuries, and death. use of military time (reader so me fr bc it took me so long to understand that shit), suggestive and matureish content.

the first thing on your mind, when you woke up, is that you had to be dead. if you opened your eyes, you would see the golden gates of heaven or the fiery pit of hell. based on how you lived your short life: you were thinking hell.

you realized you were alive and mostly well from the horrible aching from your body, the bandages wrapped around your chest, and the fact your current surrounding was a bedroom.

"hey, amor, take it easy." a voice said as you attempted to sit up.

by your side was aaron warner, sitting down on a stool next to the bed you laid on. he, uncharacteristically, looked disheveled, his clothes messy, and his eyes anxious.

your panic arose as you remembered events - fighting against the reestablishment, then getting caught, and then being shot in the chest by anderson. and then you recognized the room; it was aaron's bedroom - back at the base.

aaron notices your alarm and grabs your hands to calm you down. "it's alright you're safe here, i'm not gonna hurt you."

it may have been an idiotic move, but you believed his words.

"why are we here?"

"i had no choice. everyone believes your dead, and the base is the best place to keep you hidden."

"i don't understand...i'm not a medic by any means, but shouldn't i be dead?"

"you have sara and sonya to thank for that. they were able to save your heart from stopping before being dragged away by my father. then, i was able to take their energy as my own and heal the rest of you."

you were thankful for his aid in your life being saved, but you were too focused on many other worries to properly thank him. like the state of your friends.

you try your hand at getting up, trying to ignore the dizziness that comes with it. aaron holds you steady to stop you from falling.

aaron protests, "you need to res-" but you interrupt, "i need to go. i-i have to find everyone and help them."

"you can't."

you stop your movement and turn to aaron, "what do you mean? i know i'm in horrible shape, but i have to see juliette and everyone else could be in troubl-"

"it's over."

your face scrunches up in confusion, "what?"

aaron's silent for a few movements; you can't breathe. he looks down, his grip on you tightening, "they're dead. all of them."

you look at him in horror, your mouth open, but no words are released. your knees give out, and Aaron carries your full weight in his arms.

he slowly brings you both down to the ground next to the bed, still holding onto you. "i'm sorry, please believe me when i say that. if there was a way to spare you of this pain i would do it in a heartbeat."

you feel like a shell of yourself, you have no reaction, just an emotionless look on your face.

"what happened?" you say in a monotone voice.

"amor, i think you need to lay down or shower, then eat some-"

"what happened," you repeat with a harsher voice.

"they... overtook your friends, some were taken to be tortured, but most were.. shot dead."

"and omega point?"

"....destroyed. they got the coordinates and bombed the entire foundation."

you feel disconnected from reality; nothing feels real. everything is numb; you can't find it in yourself to let out any sort of emotion.

"so juliette, kenji, adam, james..."

aaron didn't need to answer for you to know. they're gone.

the first thing you did was laugh like a lunatic, aaron likely looked at you like you were mad. then finally, the tears came.

you yelled at aaron to get out, even though it was his room. in hysteria, you started levitating things and throwing them at him until he exited the room.

you don't know how long you spent sobbing on the floor next to the bed. you weren't even sure if you were going to stop.

your voice was sore from the number of times you wailed apologies to juliette for being a bad sister and for not being there to protect your friends.

when the tears finished, you reached denial. you knew your friends - there was no way they were dead. juliette was stronger than you, physically and sometimes mentally, so if you could survive a bullet to the chest, your sister could be alive.

when aaron comes back hours later to check on you, he didn't expect to see you walking around in new attire, packing clothes and items into a bag.

"what are you doing?"

"i have to go back."

aaron was taken aback by your statement, but you claimed there was a possibility there were people who survived. he countered saying he'd seen the damage and it wasn't likely. you didn't listen to him and continued preparing.

"this is unhealthy and possibly delusional thinking."

"well, then put me back in the asylum if i'm wrong. i'm going if you let me or not."

he sighs, and then gives in, not before insisting he comes along with you. now you were the one taken aback. was he actually offering to help you?

"why do you seem surprised? it's not as if i haven't made my care for you quite clear."

"no offense, but you're the most confusing man ever. i want to trust you, i've seen your good-natured side. you even claim to.. love me. but you work for the reestablishment, but then claim to be on my side. don't forget the fact you tried to turn juliette and i into weapons for the reestablishment, held us, hostage, at your base, and put us into a torture chamber. not exactly behavior that screams i want to help you."

at this he laughs then laughs harder and you get annoyed, not knowing what was funny. you were ready to kick him out again until he finally stooped.

"i suppose i owe you a long overdue explanation."

nothing prepared you for his next words. aaron began to retell the events from his perspective. starting with his true intentions of bringing you and juliette from the asylum - to study the both of you.

aaron explained his mother's condition, being unable to be touched - a reverse juliette basically. he sought out her at first, then discovered your existence and became intrigued more.

he invented the guise of using you both for weapons as a way for his father to agree to invest in you both.

as anderson mentioned before, juliette was of special interest because of her ability, and yours wasn't as impressive to him at the time. aaron had to convince the commander that your mind reading ability would be great for spy purposes.

once he brought the two of you to the base, he was ready to face 2 vicious and demented sisters, but it was literally the opposite of that. instead he got stuck with two stubborn and immature, you were offended at that, teenage girls.

"juliette was more of the hard-headed one, you mostly just followed along, i figured that out after the dinner and dress stunt. however, i can't say feeding you myself wasn't pleasurable for myself."

aaron saw your fear of your own ability and had intentions to help you and juliette, in his own way.

his tried various ways to unlock your potential - with juliette he tried anger and bullying and with you he knew you couldn't suppress hearing thoughts, so he figured spending time with you was the best option. but he came to understand how much he loved being around you.

"i was so addicted to being around you, i got sidetracked. but then my worry grew when you both showed no progress on enhancing your ability, so as a last resort, i arranged an experiment."

to your surprise, he revealed it was actually a simulation which was a major relief to you that no one was actually harmed by your powers, well, no one besides warner. but he partly deserved it for putting you through that.

although you were mad he implanted that fear into you, you had to admit. it did work.

"so, instead of finding some way to inform me earlier of all this, you make my sister and i think of you as some supervillain who wanted control of our autonomy." you grab the nearest pillow and launch it at him. "you're an idiot! we were scared out of our minds! juliette and i's last conversation was a fight over that! do you know much much time you could- are you seriously smiling?"

"god, i love it when you yell at me."

now that the ait was clear, you were able to put more of your faith into aaron and his intentions. and not feel bad about kissing him.

the two of you worked together on a plan to get you back to what was left of omega point.

you met an older gentleman by the name of delalieu. he was very sweet, but it got a little vexing every time he jumped to warner's defense whenever you made a remark; even ones said in levity.

a few days later, when aaron deemed it safer, you both set off to leave. although you had the misfortune of having to be stuffed into a cart to avoid being spotted. at least it was better than the body bag you were transported in the first time.

the two of you transported to what was left of omega point in a tank. aaron notably was able to drive to the location with ease. you grew suspicious because one - he told his father he didn't know how to get there and two - he was unconscious the whole time you, juliette, kenji, and adam drove there. you decide to question him on the matter.

"i wasn't completely unconscious on the trip there. i was very conscious when you were touching my hair and tracing my features."

"i knew it! you little faker, you intentionally pushed yourself onto me didn't you!"

when you both arrived, the scene was as horrible as you imagined. - rubbles and dust everywhere and a huge gaping hole miles down. you felt sick thinking about everyone who stayed behind, including james. god, you hoped at least your friends were alright.

you were suddenly tackled to the ground by warner, and the sound of a gunshot followed after. a voice yelled out, and you immediately recognized it - kenji.

you got up instantly and ran to him, attacking him with a gigantic hug, tears brimming at your eyes.

"oh my god, i thought you were dead!"

"i thought you were dead!"

"you almost killed me right now when you shot at us like a lunatic!"

"sorry, i was aiming for warner- where'd he go?"

you change subject, "juliette? is she alright?"

kenji confirms she is alive, and you felt like you could breathe again. you needed to see her as soon as possible.

kenji started looking for warner like a madman, and you, too, were curious about his whereabouts - until he startled you by "showing" up behind you. he had turned himself invisible.

he was ready to take you both back before kenji shot him, but you declined to say you had to see juliette and anyone else that survived. aaron was reluctant but then handed you a pager, not that you knew what it was, and gave you a limit of four hours. you thought it to be ridiculous, but you compromised to ease his worries.

you and kenji ventured back to adam's house, your first time being there since you were unable to the first time around. he, heart-achingly, filled you in on the events, how they searched for you, how many were lost, and who remained. you told your side of the action, including everything with aaron.

kenji did have some judgemental comments, but you understood he was reeling from the shock of everything, especially from the details regarding aaron.

you bite your tongue when kenjii speaks ill of warner. defending him would only make you look naive, plus you couldn't deny the others had their reasoning for disliking the guy. you would end up sounding like delalieu.

"so what, you like the guy now? god, don't tell me your gullible enough to fall for it just because he's the first guy to show interest in you."

his words cut deep into you, but you don't respond and change the subject back to getting to the house. you didn't want to argue after being so happy kenji is alive. but damn did you want to give him a shove with your powers.

your spirits lifted as soon as you reached the destination. you pull kenji to the front door and urge him to open it. he knocks and confirms his identity before it's opened by winston, who was shocked to see you.

you greeted him quickly, feeling bad, but your main focus was your sister. next you see alia, castle, brendan, lily and alia. (all frozen to their spots as soon as they noticed you). when you see james you give him a tight hug, thankful for his well-being.

adam and juliette walked out of the kitchen engaged in conversation, not noticing you at first. then kenji drew their attention with a cough.

both of you were paralyzed at first; you were the first to break and jump at her with tears and an overbearing hug. she was quick to return it, then the both of you started crying in relief to see each other after thinking the other was dead.

"i'm so sorry for how we ended things, you had a right to be upset and i was a bad sister for not taking your feelings into account. "

"no, i'm the one who overreacted. i should've came with you the moment you told me you felt something was wrong."

"okay we get it elsa and anna; you're both very happy to see each other. please, no more tears."

you both pulled away, laughing softly at your dramatics. you turned and gave adam a much quicker hug, him happy to see you breathing.

with greeting out of the way, everyone's attention was turned back to you, particularly how you survived. you took a deep breath, and retold everything you told kenji, leaving out intimate details about aaron and you. everyone reacted similarly to the way kenji had.

the room then filled with different questions and thoughts, all voices one another, reminding you of listening to different people's thoughts at the same time. they all started assuming the worst in warner, and this time you did defend him - but it only made you look guilty.

the subject turned over to what was the next plan of action. castle was out of it, so he provided no help. adam was the first to protest any sort of fight, his concern for james overshadowing. juliette was on the fence about it for adam's sake, but you knew she wanted to fight against the reestablishment like everyone else, if not more. especially after all they had put the two of you through.

the conversation barely got past arguments before the front door was suddenly brought down. everyone, besides you, held up weapons to attack the intruder - you held up your hands, ready to use your power if necessary. but then you recognized the intruder quickly - aaron.

you ran over in front of him and advised everyone to stand down, but they didn't listen, they were too focused on the fact aaron had arrived.

you readied yourself to lower their weapons yourself, but then aaron made a move of his own and flung all the guns across the room with levitation.

"i was gonna do that.." you mumbled quietly to yourself.

"apologies, amor, i'll let you get them next time."

everyone else was stunned, you explained aaron's gift, but it was still a shock to see. a few banters are exchanged, but aaron, uncaring as ever, ignores them and proceeds to grab your arm so the two of you can leave. however, you stop him, not wanting to leave on bad terms.

you informed everyone that aaron was on your side, and they were understandably doubtful to believe it, but as they noticed how he acted with you, it became more believable.

you took the chance to try to persuade everyone to stand up again against the rebellion. juliette and kenji were the first to side with you, and slowly everyone followed along, adam and ian being the ones more reluctant. you could respect adam for thinking of james and juliette, and ian was just an asshole, but he was also mourning. in a turn of events, castle chimed in with his support.

aaron, not thrilled about the new members of your alliance, announced the two of you would be leaving. juliette protested, not wanting to be away from you after she just got you back.

part of you longed to lay on the comfortable bed back at the base, but you needed to stay with your team. so, you made an agreement aaron could return for you the next day.

"so i'll come back for you tomorrow? thirteen hundred hours."

"thirteen hundred hours? like from now?"

"it means one o'clock."

"... one o'clock is not thirteen hundred hours from now."

aaron was holding back a laugh, juliette was just as confused, and kenji physically facepalmed.

aaron eventually left after you reassured him you'd be fine. ian was of no help as he kept insulating it was better if you left. adam stormed off not long after, juliette following to calm him. she returned looking dejected and assumed she and adam fought. kenji suggested the three of you go out for a walk, although it was late.

during the night stroll, all three of you got emotions off your chest. kenji's feelings about the whole situation, juliette's issues with adam (they were still technically broken up) , and your turmoil with warner. kenji was somewhat holding back, but you knew he was just trying to hold up a strong facade.

as you disclosed your confusion and feelings, kenji had many questions, from disbelief, and juliette mainly just patiently listened and remained silent.

"so you like the guy, for what his personality? totally has nothing to do with his looks?

"hey, i'm not shallow! ...aaron just happens to be gifted with excellent looks."

"hearing you call him aaron is so weird. and i'm not judging you if you did. seeing adam shirtless is probably what drew juliette to him at the start."

"hey!"

the light banter made the solemn conversation easier to talk through. it was nice to be always from everything for a bit, and just act like friends.

you three returned back, kenji walked to the door first, and juliette grabbed your wrist to stop you from following him.

"i just want to talk to you alone real quick. about warner,.. or aaron, whatever you call him."

you held your breath, partly ready for her to possibly start another argument.

"i know you're confused about what you feel for him still, but i need you to know if you decide you love him - i'll support you. i don't want it to get in the way our bond. after everything that's happened... i realized there no time to waste on petty little things, especially about guys. all that should matter is we're always here for each other."

you give each other another heartfelt and tearful hug; glad kenji wasn't there to comment on how sappy and emotional it is.

"so, just between us sisters, do you think you love him?"

you laugh, and open the truth of your heart of her.

back inside, you all prepared for him or, as aaron called it a "slumber party." wasn't too far off since everyone besides james, adam, and castle slept on the ground.

your place was between kenji and juliette, each of you having your own pillow and blanket. winston and brendan bantered a bit about kicking faces before the turns finally went out.

"kenji, i know it will be incredibly hard, but keep your hands to yourself."

"you wish. you should be telling your sister that, she's basically all over me every night."

"shut up."

the next day brought a lot of drama. the day started off late, leaving little time to discuss before aaron arrived. another fight between adam and juliette set off. the issue being that aaron was coming back, which adam was completely against. he had been fine with your stay, but he wouldn't compromise for letting him return. adam gave an ultimatum, if you brought warner he would essentially kick you out.

juliette went to your defense and partly aaron's for your benefit. this only set off adam more. kenji tried his hand at intervening but only got backlash from adam, who stormed off outside after. everyone else stayed quiet, but you could tell one or two silently agreed with adam.

you didn't wanna stir any more trouble than needed, so you started preparing yourself to go, clicking the little mechanism aaron gave you a couple times to ensure it worked.

brendan, winston, castle, lily insisted you stay as well. james also gave a small plead for you to remain. juliette believed she could still talk some sense into adam.

it felt great to have their support, but at the same time, you felt bad for having to divide everyone into teams, yours or adam's. instead of building a team, you were tearing one apart.

before you knew it, the newly fixed door was again slammed open by the same intruder from the day before. aaron barged in, almost of breath and distressed. you thought something happened to him because of how disarranged he looked.

he locked his gaze on you and speedily grabbed you in his arms, cupping your face and scanning you up and down for any injuries. you were a bit embarrassed as everyone was a witness to aaron fussing over your well-being.

"did you run here?"

"of course, you beeped the pager."

you assured him you were alright and turned back to everyone with faces of incredulity.

"woah, this is... freaky." winston began.

"i worked for this guy for more than a year and never even saw him smile."

you explained to aaron that you couldn't stay at the house any longer but couldn't leave everyone else either. he offers to have them stay in the training area, but kenji declines, needing a better offer. juliette sides with kenji, the rest don't fully trust warner, so they need reassurance.

you couldn't bare the thought of leaving everyone again, so you pleaded to aaron to give in to their demands, willing to compromise whatever. you were happy and a little shocked, along with everyone else, when he accepted the terms.

"i'll return tomorrow at fourteen hundred ho-" he sees your confused face again, "2 o'clock. i really must educate you on military time, amor"

"or you could just say the time on a clock like the average person."

aaron takes your hand and guides you back to the tank to make your way back to the base before anyone notes his disappearance.

you express your gratitude for his help, and he responds by saying there's not need, he would do whatever to ease your pain. he also partly owed it to you for being so dismissive when you believed your friends were alive.

"i know they all judge you right now, and maybe they always will. but, i do believe you're a good person, and sure, you have flaws, but who doesn't - i am certainly no saint. i don't want to fix you...just want to make you see yourself in a better light like i do." your final words before falling into a slumber against the window.

you return back to the base the way you came in with delalieu's help. your both back in aaron's room, not having said a word to each other since the tank. aaron's started to ask questions about what had happened back at adam's house. you briefly told him about the drama about adam not wanting you there if you were with warner.

aaron became upset, not liking how adam treated you, and reassured you he would harm him if you wanted him to. you quickly assure him that you didn't care about it, you weren't going to beg to stay where you weren't wanted. you were mostly concerned about what it had done to whatever relationship was left between juliette and adam. she obviously loved him, but she couldn't hold herself back for him either.

you go silent at the mention of juliette, remembering your last private conversation. aaron, being able to easily feel your emotions, pick up and it and presses for information.

"it's just.. she asked me if i loved you."

aaron's breath hitches, "what was your response."

"i told her, 'love is a strong word. i'm not even sure i fully understand it. but i think...no i know. i'm falling for him.' "

aaron didn't respond, he got up and went to his office, shutting the door behind him. you weren't sure what it meant. and you didn't see him for the rest of the day.

you couldn't sleep that night; your mind was doing circles in anticipation of the group's arrival tomorrow.

you got up with the intention of solely getting a glass of water, but then heard a loud noise come from the direction aaron's office.

wanting to make sure he was okay, you walked in without notice. the door was already halfway open, so you figured it was alright.

the room was bigger than your childhood home's living room; it was filled with different seats of furniture, books, shelf, etc. aaron was at his large desk - his shirt discarded and only wearing slacks and socks.

aaron's brushes you off, telling you to go to bed, but your focus is on a small jar in his hands. you ask what it is, but he avoids answering, so you grab the object yourself. he attempts to get it from you, but you move away - deja vu to when aaron wouldn't return your journal to you. it felt nice to be on the flip side of it for once.

you read the label and understood it was a medicine. then it clicked; it was for his scars. and he was embarrassed about it. it was kind of cute.

he confirms it's for his back, so you nicely offer to do it for him since he seemed to have trouble reaching it. he was obviously self-conscious no matter how much he denied it, and you told him it didn't matter; you'd already seen them. but he kept turning his back away from you. you were getting suspicious that the scars were only part of the reason he was hiding.

you got annoyed and impulsively used your power to keep him sat and finally make his back face you. you could apologize later.

then you saw it. yes, his scars were still there, but on top of that were your wonky star doodles. the ones you drew in his cells two weeks ago in his cell at omega point.

you were confused about how they were still there, darker than you remember. the pen you used was lousy; you would know since you used it to write and the ink always smudged. the pen ink was also blue, and this was black. the skin around it was also freshly red.

"wait.. is this tattooed?"

his silence confirmed it. you were speechless. he tattooed your silly little doodles. he needed the medicine to numb the pain of the ink.

"why would you do this?"

"figured it your mark was better than the ones my dad left me."

"aaron."

"it was the first time i looked at my back and smiled."

you think your heart burst on the spot.

"god, i would've made them better if i knew you were gonna mark it."

"they're perfect." god, you were ready to melt.

you compose yourself and insist you put on the medicine since it was your tattoo design that's causing him slight pain. he didn't protest this time. you applied it in silence, then worked up the courage to ask about his scars.

aaron was very hesitant, you were ready to be shut down, but then he opened up to you. his scars being a 'birthday gift' from his father. it was heartbreaking to hear and almost brought tears to your eyes, but you knew pity was the last thing he wanted.

"when you saw them back in my cell, i waited to see that look of repulse on your face, but it never came. you observed them so carefully like they were the most interesting thing to you. then you had the gall to say it was similar to abstract art."

"well, it's true. they're not ugly, and you're certainly not repulsive. the scars are like a show of strength for everything you've been through. they're yours; only you decide what they represent. anyone who thinks differently is a total loser."

"please, stop."

"i'm sorry, did i say something wr-"

"i love you. so much that the first thing i did when returning here after escaping omega point was getting delalieu to tattoo my skin because your marks faded. i didn't even let myself wash off in fear they'd disappear before i got a chance to preserve them. i couldn't wipe the smile off my face whenever i looked at it through a mirror. it always reminded me of you. our moments. our last kiss. i burn for you greatly, and you don't even realize it."

"aaron..."

"don't."

"you know how i feel. but i'm still figuring it out, this is all new to me, and i want to get to know you better-"

"please. just go." and you did.

the following day, right on schedule, aaron goes to pick up the group while you stay behind waiting in the training facility that he briefly gave you a tour of.

the group arrived, and you happily greeted them as they looked around the place in awe. aaron began to go over rules and boundaries for the group. after the previous night, you were unsure about where you stood with warner, so you decided to give him some space and stand with the rest of the group. as he spoke, he threw not-so subtle glances your way, making you confused about whether he was upset with you or not.

aaron ventured off, everyone was setting up their items, and you separated with kenji and juliette. they book had look more distressed upon their arrival. apparently, juliette took one last chance to try and convince adam to come along, he didn't budge, saying he had to protect james and encouraged juliette to stay as well. it resulted in an argument; eventually, he respected her decision to fight - but it would mean the end for them. you comforted your sister through her heartbreak, adam had been a big part of her life, even a bit of yours. so to say goodbye must've been hard for her.

kenji also tried to persuade adam, but it escalated, and the two started throwing harsh words at each other. you knew adam was his friends, whether they both acknowledged it or not, and after omega point, you were sure kenji didn't want to lose anyone else. leaving james behind made it worse.

the direction of conversation then turned to you, and you were originally going to deny any conflict, but kenji and juliette picked up on the tension between you and aaron.

juliette starts, "so, what happened with warner?"

"don't know what you mean."

kenji and juliette give each other a mutual glance, " we aren't blind; the guy kept looking at you as if you'd killed his puppy. like seriously, there could've been a rain cloud over him with how much he was sulking."

you opened up to the happenings of last night, leaving out too personal information about warner, and how you weren't sure what to do now. kenji lost his mind at the bit about the tattoo, this new side of warner still weirding him out.

"i thought you were into him?"

"i mean, i am. it's just all so confusing. i'm not trying to string him along, i just want to truly know him before i could want more with him. it feels like he knows every single thing about me, while i'm barely starting to paint a picture. or maybe he only thinks he loves me or he's only interested in me because of my gift."

"dude, everything he has done for us so far is all because of you. what kind of guy tattoo's a stupid drawing someone drew on their back? and i swear he gets cartoon heart eyes when he looks at you too long. i know i called you naive for believing it, but that was before i saw first hand how intimate his feelings are for you."

"he's right, y/n. think about if he only cared about your gift, he would've been treating us the same, after all, he brought both of us in. sure, he acts decent towards me, but i'm pretty sure it has more to do with the fact we're sisters. you don't play nice with someone's family unless you really like them."

you were silent as you absorbed both their perspectives.

kenji sighs, "damn, i need a love life."

"interested in someone else."

"technically single, but i'd choose the asylum over you."

"i'm starting to miss when you both were meek and quiet."

after that friendly therapy session, you regained your focus on the important task, formulating a plan to overtake anderson. you had a few ideas, some you talked about with aaron, but a seventeen-year-old girl can only do so much on her own, so that's why you bring in your sister, who is also seventeen. as the two of you went through essentially the same trauma, she had as much right to be a big part of this as you.

aaron came back hours later, and everyone gathered around and took a seat somewhere. to your surprise, aaron sat down right the to you. the tension is so much worse side by side. knowing aaron could read what you felt didn't make it better.

you began to illustrate the details of the plan, juliette helping fill in and explain points. the goal is to get anderson to sector 45; to do that, you had to take over sector 45. getting people and soldiers to rebel was going to be the trickiest part, and much of the group wasn't on board that it could work.

"we're going to have to show them our strengths, i'll help them see our strength." you explain.

"and if they shoot us?" ian counters..

juliette shrugs, "then don't do it, i'm sure my sister and i are capable of being amazing by ourselves."

"real humble , j."

brendan speaks up, "so, we've got somewhat of a synopsis of juliette's gift, but, no offense y/n, what is it you can do besides read minds?"

it was true; almost everyone wasn't aware of other capabilities you possessed. you didn't like to divulge your gift much back at omega point, kenji, juliette, and castle knowing the most. unlike juliette, who had many different events where she showed her amazing strength, and you were sure they saw more when she practiced at adam's house while you were separated.

you briefly revealed more about your powers, mind-reading, telekinesis, and your ongoing training in telepathic defense. you admitted to losing control a few times as well. the group looked more amazed as you went on.

"prove it."

"yeah, c'mon dude, show us."

everyone else started egging you on to make a show of your powers; you even saw aaron look interested in wanting to see it. you gave in, and asked aaron for permission to throw some objects around, he nodded.

you started levitating different objects and throwing a few around. kenji started begging for you to lift him, so you did - then winston and brendan kept begging to go next. you showcased a small shield of energy you were able to produce. lastly, they wanted to see your telepathic projection, but you explained it would involve harming one of them, so you shut it down.

"so like, you can do all that too right? since you can steal powers?" winston questions warner.

"yes, if i wanted to i could take hers, or any of your powers and use it."

you cough into your hand, "no one's better than the original, though."

"so the two of you together can basically can..."

"take over the world?"

"...was going to say kick serious ass, but you're not wrong."

warner doesn't respond, but you can see him holding back a smile.

the thought of warner taking powers was eerie to the group, but you reassured them of your faith and trust in aaron. then the conversation redirects to the plan. castle questions of what is supposed to happen if you do win, such as who is going to lead.

"i will." juliette pulls you by the arm next to her, "and y/n will help me."

the room falls silent. even warner is still. your head snaps to your sister, that was not a topic the two of you discussed. nor did you know it was up for discussion. you, of course, didn't express your surprise, you couldn't show doubt when this whole meeting relied on trust. juliette's speech on the new world motivated everyone to follow through with the battle plan, you silently supported it, but in your mind, you didn't think it was the best idea for you both to lead a whole country. you think juliette forgets just how young and inexperienced you both are.

but you were sure this was a problem that could be mended later, right?

aaron and you were alone in his room again, the silence so deafening, you mentally cringed. you attempted to start the conversation on his thoughts about the plan, but he began to brush you off. frustrated, you call him out on his recent behavior.

"why is it all or nothing with you? i didn't reject you- all i said was i want to know you better, i saw you in a bad light for a good while. i want to see the positive just as much."

"or maybe you're just expecting too much from me."

"why are you being so stubborn!"

"because you being disgusted with what you learn, would end me."

he walked out after, a common occurrence, it seemed, these past days.

you vented all your frustrations into training the next day. you told yourself you wouldn't focus on warner, no matter how good he looked in sweatpants, and instead use your pent-up energy to master your powers.

it paid off well; you got closer to creating a shield. but maybe a little too well, since you accidentally launched kenji across the room with your energy force. he got you back off, turning invisible and tripping you. juliette concentrated on moving her dumbbell with the force of will, but she struggled. reminded you a lot of your training at omega point. you offered her tips on what worked for you, and kenji coached.

at some point, you went to the back to drink from your water bottle, unintentionally near where warner was bench pressing. then suddenly you heard someone yell 'get down'. it all happened in a flash, you turned around a bit late, and the rock wall behind you came crumbling down at you. you quickly attempted to lift your hands, levitate most of the impact and braced yourself. suddenly, instead of your body colliding with dozen of sharp rocks, you were surrounded in bubbles. you turned the rumble into fucking bubbles.

you stood mouth wide open in shock for a minute, the people around you just as amazed. aaron was the first to run to you, asking if you were alright, and you nodded, still a bit shocked. he expressed his astoundment at your newfound skill.

juliette then came up to you and profusely apologized, and you assured her you were okay and accidents happen.

"i can't count how many times i almost knocked out castle with things during my training. you'll get the hang of it. plus, i'm sure aaron had trouble learning to control power too."

"oh, no. though i've always been very good at everything i do."

you smack his chest, "you are seriously no help."

you continue to train very hard for the rest of the week, your muscle will likely permanently ache in pain.

you and aaron hadn't gotten much better, you really did try to reach out so many times, but if he wasn't going to cooperate, why waste energy.

he made a habit of intentionally putting his focus on things around the base and working late, so he wouldn't see you until you were already asleep.

if things ended badly between you two, i'd be because of his own stupidity, not for your lack of trying nor the judgment of his character.

other than that, all was well. until kenjii decided to casually drop a bomb that adam and james were coming to the base. juliette started freaking out, and you weren't sure where you and adam stood, but you were excited to see james again.

adam arrived, and tensions between the ex-couple were high. they both were cordial but weren't sure how to act around one another. adam went up and apologized to you for his treatment, and you accepted it because he was once your friend, and you hated grudges. james excitedly greeted you, and you gave him a small tour.

then aaron showed up, ignoring adam, but he and james went back in forth in exchanges. it was very entertaining to watch, and aaron pointed out your enjoyment.

"why do you call her amor?"

"it means love in spanish."

"so, do you love her?"

"why, do you?"

"n-no! she's really pretty- i mean, i like her...no, ugh, she's like a million years older than me!"

"hey! i'm not prehistoric!"

you cut the exchange short, grabbing james on the shoulders and dragging him away, "how about we go back t kenji while i explain to you age numbers..."

you and juliette got upgrades in suits. yours similar to your former, but with minor changes. your color was now a darker red with accents of black, your coat was now high to low with slides for the sides of your legs to show, new knee-high combat coots, and new long fingerless gloves. yours and juliette's new material was made to accommodate your powers.

for training, you watched juliette and kenji go back in forth in combat - kenji mostly won due to technique, but juliette overpowered him a few times.

aaron came up to you, and insisted the two of you train in combat together. you rejected his offer; combat was not your forte, you were repeatedly told by kenji many times. so you just stuck to using your powers. but aaron wouldn't back off.

"it's important to learn combat, amor."

"if i run into a bad guy i'll just fling him away."

"and when you can't use your powers, what happens?"

you were going to argue that wouldn't happen, but knew it wouldn't suffice for him, so you just gave in, so he would shut up.

it was no shocker that he easily blocked your punches and stopped any attack. he even had the audacity to be amused at how badly you were doing.

"wow, you are quite terrible."

"okay, i get it i suck. can i go back to my training?"

"c'mon, amor, don't give up so easily. punch me."

as much as you were annoyed, you didn't want to physically hurt him. aaron laughed when you told him that. that itself, ticked you off. and it did not help that now you had an audience invested in the interaction.

you still didn't relent, aaron was a bit disappointed, but he focused on fixing your form.

you don't know if it was the fact aaron laughed, his constant comments, or all your pent-up frustration, but something came over you. while aaron was distracted with giving walking you through hitting an opponent, you hit him - hard. you might've used some of your powers to make the hit stronger, but he didn't need to know that.

aaron staggered back, shockingly caught off guard. you honestly expected him to block it like your other ones; but no you managed to land a hit on his cheekbone area, hitting some of the side of his nose. your poor form made for your knuckles to hurt badly.

everyone stopped what they were doing; even you froze. kenji in the back, trying not to laugh. aaron then recovered, his land touching the side of his face. his face didn't show anger, pain, nor surprise - he was smiling in admiration.

"oh my god, i'm so sorry!"

"no, don't apologize, amor. i'm very content being the first to experience your strength firsthand."

you and aaron ended up cutting practice short and went to the infirmary. you helped treat the large bruise on his face you'd given him as a small apology, and he wrapped your sprained knuckles and partly chasted you for incorrect hand form. was he looking to get punched again?

the following day, aaron woke you up earlier than your normal routine. he mentioned an opportunity for you and juliette to finally get practice outside of the base, and you quickly agreed. you asked why so suddenly, and then he disclosed he was going to visit his mother. it was her birthday, he explained. he didn't say much after that and went over that kenji will keep you and juliette invisible after he leaves.

but you couldn't help your curiosity and asked a little about his mother. hearing the story of his ring broke your heart. the only gifts you got were when you and juliette exchanged homemade gifts for your shared birthday, but the story made you appreciate that tradition much more.

"i think it's good you still visit her."

"is it?"

"it is. knowing you have someone there is sometimes enough. whenever i remembered i had my sister with me, it made the asylum not completely terrible. and around you, i feel like i achieve anything."

juliette, kenji, and you, invisible, met with warner at his tank. you didn't even need to tell him of your presence before he helped you into the tank and got on the driver side to start it.

"how'd you..." you ask, confused.

"i can sense your presences. especially yours."

"woah, freaky. what's mine feel like? peanut better?" he got ignored.

you settled on the opposite window side, juliette next to you, and kenji next to aaron. kenji started shuffling around, uncomfortable.

"dude, y/n, switch seats with me."

"what why?"

"your boyfriend is touching my leg."

"you flatter yourself." aaron interjects.

"c'mon hurry up! i think he's about to knife me..."

"just switch with juliette. it's easier."

"no way, if i'm gonna move, i might as well get the window seat."

you roll your eyes (not that he can see), and the two of you begin a messy movement of bodies to switch seats. poor juliette, stuck in the middle, getting hit by an occasional limb.

"ow, you just hit me in the face-" juliette complains.

"sorry, i'm trying my best-"

"now you just hit me!" you exclaim.

"oh my god, let me just-"

"kenji!"

kenji was the first to get to his new seat, you were situated over both him and juliette. kenji, tired of your leg in his face, shoved you with brief warning. and in an attempt to stable yourself you put your hands out on aaron's lap, but one hand missed. and landed on his groin. aaron visibly flinched and put his lips together in a straight line to contain his painful expression.

you gasped and hastily moved your hands in a panic, then to make matters worse - you fell face first in his lap. you were so happy to be invisible at the moment.

aaron takes a sharp intake of air, and his knuckles turn white from how tight he grips the wheel. you scramble you sit correctly, accidentally putting a hand on his groin again before finally in the seat. the silence was deafening.

aaron promptly dropped you both off at an empty site and bid you goodbye. you gave him some last words for comfort that you noticed he appreciated. then he went off.

sometime later, it was time for the four of you to meet up again. the practice had been somewhat successful. there were many miscalculations with practicing and being invisible. the three of you kept stumbling into each other, having the wrong place meant, and arguing over who was right. but ignoring that, you did get some practice in there.

aaron, however, was unusually late. it worried you. kenji and juliette didn't think much of it. but since you knew his location, you sensed there was something wrong. you asked both of them to check on him to ensure he was already, and you three walked to the house. you avoided mentioning aaron's mother.

you asked juliette and kenji to wait outside as you went inside.knji begrudgingly agreed, ensuring he could keep the invisibility up inside, too. juliette bid you to be careful and return as soon as possible.

you saw a few different pictures of aaron with his mother as a child. you looked through different rooms until you found him. he was sitting on the floor with his knees to his chest, his frame trembling. his mother died; you put together. you quickly knelt down and gave him a hug that he accepted. you let him hold you tightly as he sobs sorrowfully. it was painful to witness, so you let him cry onto your shoulder for however long he needed.

an hour later you returned, kenji and juliette already in the tank, no invisibility. you didn't need for them to say anything to know they had questions, so you avoided their gaze. next to you, aaron held your hand the whole way back

his mother's death reminded you of his family, the unknown fact to him that he shares blood with adam and james. you wanted him to know, but truly, you didn't want any part of that mess. knowing was already knawing at you as it was. juliette disagreed; she thought adam needed to tell aaron.

you thought leaving aaron alone was the best decision. you even planned to spend the night where everyone else was. but as you were packing a bag, he stopped you. aaron grabs your arm and turns you to look at him.

"you're right. i am holding back. i was telling you how much you were in denial, but it was me who was holding back. you've always seen me in a light like no one has. i've never thought of myself as even a decent man until you came around. and it scares me. so much. i'm afraid of disappointing you, and you'll be disgusted with me, see the monster i see every day in the mirror. but if giving more of myself is all it takes to be yours, then it's done. you can learn every crevice of my soul if it means you'll stay with me."

you knew it then, "i love you." you are in love.

he grabs your face and kisses you in less than a second. the kiss being so loving and careful, he takes his time memorizing your lips. he lifts you in the air prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist. from there, the kiss molds into passion and need. before you know it, you're both lying on the bed with him hovering over you.

aaron groans into your mouth, "say it again."

you softly giggle, "i love you."

"god, you have no idea what you just unleashed, amor."

your stomach is doing a million glips. your entire body is in frenzy. you're ready to have a heart attack there and then. it was only just the beginning as well.

"lift your hips for me, amor."

"c'mon, angel, don't get shy on me now."

"i'm afraid you're never getting rid of me now mi amor."

very long night.

you slept through most of the morning, only woken up by aaron laying kissing down your neck. then he started going lower down your body. any sleep you had was now gone.

"aaron.. what are you doing."

"nothing."

"liar."

"shhh.. you just lay there, i'm just going to enjoy my breakfast."

the man was insaitable; you were sure you weren't ever gonna get out of bed that day. but eventually, you did. had to dedicate half an hour to walking properly again.

you went to you rfinal fitting for suits, and the new look was incredible. juliette traded the purple for a new black suit - kenji not liking his color stolen.

"why am i the only one in color now?"

"so, you can get spotted and shot at first while the rest of us get away." kenji answers.

"you're the worst."

aaron walked up behind you and whispered in your ear, "how quickly can you take this off?"

you smack his chest and give a playful disapproving look.

"i mean, it definitely can stay on, too."

"aaron!"

the bliss of everything helped ease your nerves for the following day. you were sat in aaron's room going over the plan for the millionth time. aaron kept reassuring you you'd be perfect and worrying will do nothing but install fear.

"it's just... what if it backfires. what if no one listens or surrenders?"

"it wont and they will."

"you're right. i'll just tell them my scary boyfriend will come after them."

"for you? always." he kisses your cheek, "i like the sound of you saying boyfriend, but scary?"

"well, everyone besides me is pretty scared of you."

"and what about you, what do you think of me?"

"i think you're cute."

"cute? yeah, let me show you just how cute, i can be."

aaron can never take his off of you for too long.

the next day, you, juliette, and the others stood in front of sector 45. both the people and the soldiers gathered there, all of their eyes fixed on your group. it was like the world's largest show and tell.

aaron started it off with a speech, informing everyone of the truth and the fact you and juliette were alive and well. then your sister took over, and directly told the crowd the plan to destroy the reestablishment, you gave a few words of your own, but juliette did most of the talking much to your relief.

then the questions from the crowd starting, so it was time for the group to showcase their powers. finally it was down to juliette and you.

juliette climbed to a building s good hundred feet from the ground, then jumped off and landed - making the ground tremble and shatter beneath her.

"how the hell do i top that?" you whisper to yourself.

with a comforting look from aaron, and a deep breath, you stepped into the front. you looked for a fairly easy but impressive thing to lift and spotted a very tall tower. bingo.

using your ability, you began carefully levitating it above the ground. you closed your hand into a fist, and the tower began breaking into bits. people began to panic as the rubble started coming toward them, but suddenly, you transformed the pieces into butterflies flying around the people. everyone looking around in amazement.

you took the biggest deep breath once you were done. very happy your practice paid off, and you didn't accidentally end up killing a crowd.

the crowd cheered and roared. the presentation proved to be successful because they got on board with destroying the reestablishment. the soldiers surrendered and joined the rebellion.

back in the training room, everyone was overjoyed with the success of overtaking sector 45, but now came the hardest part. winning a war.

juliette ran straight to you, attacking you in a very strong hug. so strong you had to tell her to chill on the power a bit. she apologized and released you. the recent events were still reeling in your mind, not fully comprehended.

"oh my god, juliette what did we just do?"

"we just started a war my dearest sister."

and now you had to wait to face anderson in likely a day or two. he almost killed you last time. but you wouldn't let him get lucky again.

the group, minus aaron, sat in the training room discussing what was next. one talk to another led to the topic of anderson.

"i've never even met the guy. wonder what he's like?"

"he's handsome. it's actually insane how evil, but striking he is." you blurt out.

juliette agrees, but the group looks at you weirdly.

"dude, you just called your boyfriend's dad attractive."

"what? i don't mean it in a weird way."

"hey, at least you've got a backup option if the first anderson doesn't work out. "

you throw a pillow at kenji's head.

then the topic of anderson's name came about, and that's when the trouble began. adam answered his name was paris; but suddenly, aaron arrived in the room, overhearing the conversation.

aaron put him against the wall, interrogated him on how he knew, and adam not saying anything. you couldn't take it anymore, so you yelled out the truth.

"he's your bother!"

aaron didn't believe it. juliette kept pressuring adam until he finally confessed. everyone gave the two of them space to work things out as everyone else busied themselves. when all was on steady terms, aaron sat with you.

"you should've told me."

"i know, i'm sorry. but it really wasn't my secret to tell."

"i had a right to know."

"c'mon, if you had some sort of family secret of mine, would you tell me right away?"

he hesitates, "you're right. you didn't want to get involved, i understand that."

you tell yourself it didn't matter, but you couldn't help but ask, did he deliberately avoid answering. you brush it off, probably nothing.

you returned to aaron's room, you both talked about the brother situation more, and aaron mentioned spending more time with both kent's. you were happy to see he was content to learn about his new family and want to see them more.

"this is great. i'm happy when you're happy. it's deserve more close people in your life."

"but i have you, and that's enough."

"very sweet, but family relationships are different. i was fortunate to have a sister in my life. what if my mother hadn't had the both of us, juliette not being my sister? seems unimaginable.."

aaron goes rigid, being in his lap, you notice immediately, "you alright?"

he relaxes and nods, "this whole situation has me a bit disorientated. enough brother talk. let me remind you why our relationship has much better advantages than other ones.."

a full night of sleep was just a foreign concept at this point.

it took one day for anderson to come to the sector. you all had luckily kind of prepared for it, so there was a plan set that you all were to follow. kenji, juliette, and you were responsible for going to the ship to deal with anderson while the rest took care of the matter on land.

before separating, you said your farewell and good luck to aaron. you tried to cry when saying goodbye to james and promising all would be fine. lastly, you gave aaron a kiss, and you promised each other to be safe.

"i have no doubts that you will succeed. my father can't even fathom the power you possess."

as you three board the port, you notice the massive groups of soldiers. juliette has the idea of you pushing them into the water with your powers, which you do.

you each take turns getting onto the ship, 5-second gap each. however, once you get inside, you can't find neither juliette or kenji. still invisible, you take your chances going through different doors, trying not alert soldiers.

but it fails because bullets began shooting in your direction. you run as fast as you can; unlike juliette, you are not invincible neither was your suit, at least not entirely.

with your invisibility gone, you get cornered with at least 7 soldiers, armed. your instincts kick in, and you start throwing men and attacking them with your energy. one soldier begins shooting at you when you're caught off guard. you hold your hand out as a protection and close your eyes, but you see the bullet is stopped - by your shield. you hadn't even made an effort to create it yet, and it presented itself like it was an automatic presence.

after witnessing that, the guard abandoned the ship and ran off. you couldn't blame him; you doubt he got paid enough to deal with all this.

you attention is shifted when you heard loud crashes and screams. you recognize them as your friend and your sister. you rush toward the room where the sound was originating.

you see kenji on the ground in pain and juliette not too far off; she's crouched down, clutching her head, and struggling to stand. you spot anderson, with another man, who you recognize is causing juliette's pain with his sonic wave gift.

you focus your energy on the boy, focusing on hurting him. then he stops his pressure waves and starts howling in pain, crouching down like juliette had. you were in a trance, channeling all your energy into hurting the guy, then - you snapped his neck.

you ran to juliette first, helping her get up, then you checked on kenji who was in worse shape.

anderson drew his gun, and started shooting bullets at you both, but it simply just bounced off. you and juliette drew your own weapons; you looked at each other and knew what had to happen next.

you focus your energy on anderson, his legs then collapse under him. he starts scrambling on the ground. juliette steps on his hands - shattering his borns with her power.

"remember that lesson on justice getting served?"

you shoot him in the chest, and juliette aims for his head.

4 shots - one for adam, one for aaron, one for juliette, and one for you.

it was a blur after that. sara and sonya were found and attended to kenji who was luckily not in any fatal condition, he would be okay.

it felt like you were experiencing someone out-of-body, unreal. juliette went up to the speaker system, capable of speaking to the entirety of the sector. she announced the end of the reestablishment and its new leader.

he was dead. it was over.

still bloodied and bruised, you stood on the tallest tower of the compound. you hadn't talked to anyone; everyone too busy rejoicing. but you were still digesting everything that had just happened.

you look over the new land and wonder what could be in store next.

you're not surprised when juliette and aaron find you, they know you too well at this point. they don't say anything and each take a side next to you. aaron puts a hand around your waist and tugs you toward him.

"the entire rest of the world is coming after us now, you know."

"i'd love to see them try." juliette says confidently.

"i believe as long as our bonds remain strong, we can overcome anything." though. that wasn't how you really felt.

you didn't want to damper a glorious day. but you couldn't help the pit forming inside of your stomach, telling you this was only the beginning of a treacherous path.

but nothing come could destroy the bonds you forged, right?

@whatsupb18 @letspretendimnottrash @heart-an0n @mrsspector-grant @kikilarast10 @nina357 @lupinswolfsbanes (tysm for the support)

#aaron warner x reader #aaron warner imagine #aaron warner #aaron warner anderson #aaron warner fanfic #shatter me #shatter me fanfic #shatter me series #juliette ferrars #kenji kishimoto #adam kent #x female reader #x y/n #x reader #reader insert #reader imagine #headcannons

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lincolndjarin · 1 year

Text

Best Kept Secret

chapter eighteen : portrait of a man (RE-UPLOAD)

ao3 link ✿ series masterlist ✩ main masterlist ✧

pairing : bodyguard!Din Djarin x afab!princess!reader

rating : 18+ mdni

word count : 5.4k

summary : the mandalorian and reader do some reading

warnings, etc. : language, mentions of sex

A/N : i had to change accounts so this is a re-upload of my ongoing fic bks!!

It’s deliciously warm when you wake. You can feel his heartbeat and you can feel the soft traces of sunlight dancing along your back. You stretch in his arms slightly but freeze up as you feel him nuzzle his chin into your hair, planting a kiss against your hairline.

His helmet is still off.

And the room is completely illuminated by the sunrise.

He seems to sense your hesitancy and after some adjustment his face is concealed once more as you gaze up at him.

“Sorry sarad, I must have fallen asleep without it on.” His voice is gravelly and thick with sleep as he looks down at you. He’s acting like it wouldn’t be the end of the world if you accidentally saw.

It might very well be.

You know his creed is precious to him, even if he says he is an apostate. You don’t want him to break it just for you and end up regretting it later.

“I don’t want to see until I’m allowed to.” That doesn’t really make sense and you know it. “Will I ever be allowed to? How does that work?” He sits up as you speak, stretching his arms above his head.

“I’ll explain it another time, right now I need to get you back to your room before someone realizes you're gone.” He’s crawled to the edge of the bed and he’s already pulling his boots on.

Oh yeah.

It was easy to fall into a fantasy of staying here with him. For a moment there you had completely forgotten that you were married, and expected in other places. You stand looking for your dress as he attaches his armor.

“Don’t change yet, it’ll be easier to sneak you back in if you aren’t wearing a shimmery gown.” He’s so quick with it, in the time it takes you to even find your gown he’s completely done getting ready. “Do you have everything?” He turns to face you as he takes the dress from you and throws it over his arm.

Your eyes dart to the shelf.

Your knife is up there.

He chuckles when he catches your line of sight.

“Not gonna happen, princess. Let’s go.” He takes your hand and hastily drags you out of the cabin. In the morning light you can see what he had been carrying you over last night.

The cabin was built partially on top of the lake. It must be a pain having to carefully step over all of the water but he doesn’t seem to mind as he scoops you into his arms and looks to be contemplating something.

“Is your bedroom window unlocked?”

That’s an odd question. But you know it is, you’re several floors up so you never lock it.

“Yes, why?”

“No reason.” You can hear a grin on his face.

He starts walking, not really caring if he steps into the water as he carries you towards the castle. Once you're through the gardens and past the forest trail he adjusts his cowl to cover your face. You rest your head against his chest as he makes his way towards what you assume to be the servant's entrance. But you never hear a door open, instead he leans down to whisper to you.

“Keep your eyes closed.”

Is he about to take off his helmet in broad daylight?

You don’t get a chance to question it as you shut your eyes and you feel the cowl ripped from your face, there’s an unfamiliar rush of air against your skin and the sound of a click and a creak.

“You can open them now.” He whispers again, you aren’t sure what you expect to see when you open your eyes but it certainly isn’t him standing on the outside of your window sill, balancing you in his arms.

You know immediately that it’s a mistake as you look down and find yourself several stories off the ground.

“Maker! What is wrong with you!” You cling to him tighter but he simply laughs as he peels you off of him to set you inside.

“Sorry, hand me your clothes.” There’s a sudden urgency in his voice that keeps you from arguing, you strip to your undergarments and toss him the things you borrowed, he doesn’t hesitate to throw your dress onto the floor. “I’ll see you in a few minutes.” You’re left staring dumbfounded as he jumps off the ledge at the same moment your door swings open and Elaine’s voice fills the room.

“I’m telling you, we don’t have to knock, she isn’t here, we’ll just wait for h-“ She stops and stares at you with wide eyes and your face gets hot at the implications of her words.

“Good morning girls.” You stammer out as they both look surprised to see you.

“Apologies for not knocking my lady.” Elaine bows as she says it, cocking an eyebrow in your direction but you don’t give her a reaction as you simply walk to the mirror to be prepped.

They seem relieved that you don’t have anything to say and you’re relieved that Elaine doesn’t press further as they begin to dress you. The gown Lysa chooses for today is a soft gray color, the fabric shimmers in the light and it sort of reminds you of the Mandalorian’s armor.

Nobody seems to have anything to say to each other this morning but you truly don’t mind. In a few minutes you’ll get to see him again.

And things are okay now.

Right?

You’ve established a mutual want.

But what does that mean?

Shit.

You hadn’t really talked about that. But that shouldn’t matter, he had practically confessed his love, he had given you his name.

You need to talk about it.

But he never wants to talk about it.

This time has to be different though, things are good.

It has to be different.

You don’t even realize they’ve finished until Elaine clears her throat.

“Kriff, sorry, thank you girls, you’ve done wonderful work as always.” It’s true. As you look up at yourself in the mirror to take in another amazing job done by them. You can’t even tell that you were being carried through the forest less than an hour ago.

“Thank you, my lady, shoes?” Lysa holds up a pair of flats and you nod, taking a seat at the vanity and hiking your skirt up a bit.

Shit.

You’re still wearing his socks.

In your rush you must have forgotten about them.

She stares for only a moment, her eyes darting up to your face before she removes them, slipping on your flats. You can tell by the way her eyebrows raise ever so slightly that she sees the dirt on the soles of your feet from your barefoot walk in the gardens last night, but thankfully she says nothing. After a beat of silence you cough awkwardly.

“Thank you girls, that will be all.” They nod as they both take their leave. You give them time to make their way down the hall before you grab your journal and some pens, as you throw the door open he’s there just like always. He doesn’t look like someone who had flown you up to your window this morning, he looks exactly the same as always. There’s no sense in concealing the smile on your face as you stare at him.

“Library?” You ask as he nods, you begin your trek and he still stands behind you but closer than ever before, just a step or two back. “Can we talk today?”

“Of course, princess.” A wave of relief washes over you as he says it. This might be the first time he’s ever had a positive reaction to that question. You walk in a happy silence until you arrive. Today you do not hesitate to sit in the nook, no longer haunted by the memories of what’s transpired there.

He stands sort of bashfully, looking at you and then at a few chairs nearby.

This is why you need to talk.

It’s things like this, your relationship is so vaguely defined and in the cold light of day, just Din, doesn’t know where to sit.

You scootch over a bit and pat the space next to you.

“Sit with me?” You say softly to hopefully ease the anxiety that is apparent in his body language. He relaxes a bit as he takes a seat next to you, you fit like puzzle pieces, like the nook was made for the two of you to sit comfortably.

It’s an added bonus that it’s far enough into the shelves that you’ll hear anyone coming before they see you.

He leans back against the glass as you open your journal, uncapping a pen and lazily doodling. You can feel his gaze on the pages but you don’t mind.

“What did you want to talk about mesh’la?” He murmurs as he begins to trace his fingers along your back, drawing shapes into the fabric of your dress.

It shocks you a bit.

His blatant affection.

Nothing could have prepared you for him to act like this in the daylight.

Of course he had humored you in the markets, and when you had been “together” he had always been kind but now his voice had a certain devotion to it, and he touched you like he needed to do it to stay grounded.

He almost seems… clingy.

It makes your heart flutter.

“I guess I just wanted to talk about this,” You gesture at him with the pen. “us.”

He hums softly in agreement.

“Okay, what about us?” He tugs gently at one of the ribbons on your corset, not hard enough to pull it loose, just hard enough to grab your attention. You shoot a glare at him, there’s no actual fire behind it.

“I thought you said you’d be good?”

“And you said I could touch you a little.” As he says it you roll your eyes before turning back to your drawings. You’ve been sketching the same curved line. The hook of his nose you had felt last night. If he recognizes it he doesn’t say anything.

“Fine. What exactly are we?” He resumes his tracing as you say it, it feels like a juvenile question, it’s what you would always ask your boyfriends back on Hoth after a few weeks of screwing around, but he doesn’t seem bothered by it.

“What was it you called me in the gardens? Your lover? I could be that if that’s what you’d like me to be.” His fingers have moved to your shoulders now, the shapes on your pages have turned into rough outlines of what you remember his jaw is shaped like.

Lover feels too impersonal.

This is more than that.

He certainly isn’t your boyfriend, can you even have a boyfriend? Afterall you already have a husband.

Would Din want to be your husband someday?

Could Din be your husband someday? Kodo certainly wouldn’t just let you leave, the trade deals your family so desperately needed would be useless if you did. Is it too soon to be thinking such a thing? You have only just truly become emotionally involved but also you’ve spent every waking moment with him for several weeks at this point. And you’ve had sex.

Maker, why does this have to be so confusing?

“Is there maybe a Mando’a word for what we are?” You turn to look at him again.

He starts to say something but then he stops, seemingly changing his mind.

“How about kar’ta?”

“Kar’ta? What’s that mean?” You like the way the word feels in your mouth. His knuckles are dragging against your arm now.

“It means heart. You would be my heart and I would be yours.” His voice is warm and it feels like you’re sinking into his touches.

His heart.

You like that.

“My Kar’ta.” You say, looking down at your drawings, you have several mixed and matched faces, none of which seem to look right, you hold them up for him to see. “Do any of these look correct?”

He points to the one of the bottom left, the eyes are lopsided.

“That ones the closest, other than the eyes, none of the eyes are right.” You sigh, you already knew he would say that.

“They never are.” You flip the page and start drawing pairs of eyes. You’re silent for a few minutes, he continues tracing shapes into your back and you continue drawing, you eventually realize he’s mimicking your sketches.

You know what you want to tell him. It’s a strange pivot in conversation but you need him to know.

Your next words force themselves from your mouth. “I don’t love Kodo, I don’t even like him.” His movements stop, only for a second before continuing.

“I would hope not, I don’t know if you noticed but he’s a bit of a monster.”

“I know, I just wanted to say it. I just- I mean, I don’t think of myself as married to him, it’s more a title than anything else.” You hesitate for a moment. “And we don’t have sex. In case you were wondering.” You haven’t thought about that fact in a while.

Someday Kodo will want heirs.

It makes you shudder a bit.

Maybe Din will get you out of here before that happens.

He senses the tension you’re suddenly plagued with and he switches to just rubbing gentle circles against your back.

“Okay.” He speaks so quietly now.

“I don’t ever want to have sex with him.” You whisper, mostly to yourself.

It had always been an inevitable thing. A duty you had to fulfill. But that was before you knew who he was. Before you knew you had married a monster. And that was before Din, before your kar’ta.

“You don’t have to. I promise.”His voice is soothing but it does nothing to put you at ease.

It’s a promise he can’t keep.

But you don’t want to linger on this any longer so you nod, much to your chagrin he senses your hesitancy as he sits up.

“Hey, I mean it. If he so much as touches you again, I swear it will be the last time.”

“You can’t guarantee that Din.” He’s taking your sketchbook from you, setting it aside before holding your hands in his.

“He isn’t going to touch you. Ever again. I never should have let him in the first place.” His grip on your hand tightens ever so slightly as he recalls the memory, you can’t help but frown.

“I’m glad you let him, you wouldn’t be here right now if you hadn’t.”

That makes him go quiet.

You both know you’re right, if he had laid a finger on Kodo he would at the very least have been fired. Worst case scenario he’d be dead.

“He won’t touch you again.” He sounds firmer this time. “I’m sworn to you. No one gets to touch you unless you want them to, not even me.”

You want to believe that he could stop Kodo. That he could stop all six of his battle droids. It’ll be easier if you just let yourself believe it.

So for now you do.

You drop his hands and rest your head on his shoulder.

“Okay.” You mumble.

“Okay.” He tilts his helmet slightly to rest against your head.

You reach around to grab your book back. Opening to the page with the eyes.

“Which ones are right?” You point around the page. He analyzes them for a bit before taking the pen again, scribbling until he’s drawn messy but identifiable eyes.

“Like this.”

His drawing is crude but the eyes are nice. You carefully tear the outline of them out before placing them over the other drawing he had pointed out.

It almost looks right.

It almost suits the person you know.

He lets you stay leaning on his shoulder so you don’t bother moving as you flip to an empty page. You think for a few moments on what to draw.

The tiny toothbrush.

You think of the sketch of mismatched parts you now have of him and what you’ve been able to feel out and you subconsciously start drawing a child.

You give him Din’s nose, and dark curls. You don’t bother trying to copy his eyes, opting to instead give the little boy wide dark eyes. You scribble out several different versions of the child you’ve made up as he watches silently.

Eventually you stop and just stare at the page full of little faces staring up at you.

Does this boy exist somewhere out there?

It sort of seems that way, when you look at all the pieces of Din that don’t seem to make sense. The toothbrush, he had mentioned a kid at one point but hadn’t said much about it and now you know that he willingly showed his face to someone. Was it his child? Why did he have to say goodbye to his own child?

Can you imagine Din being a father? When you think of how well he takes care of himself it makes you worry a bit for any child in his care but then you think of how well he takes care of you.

Selflessly.

He’s probably a good father. That must be where his protective nature comes from.

His laughter breaks you out of your trance and he points to one of the drawings, the boy in that one has the largest eyes, and the pupils take up nearly the entirety of them.

“You got his eyes right in that one.” He says as he chuckles.

“What?” You stammer out.

His eyes.

“I assume you’re trying to figure out who he is? None of these are even close, but those eyes, those are his.”

Of course he knew what you were doing, nothing got past him.

You wait for more but that’s all he gives you.

You can wait longer, until he’s ready to talk about it. Based on the way he sighs you think that moment might be right now but he says something else instead.

“I don’t think I’ve apologized yet for what I said. Truly apologize.” You close the journal on your own this time before setting it down.

He’s talking about what he said.

“I was… bored. You were entertainment.”

He knows you haven’t simply forgotten about it. Afterall, how could you?

“It doesn’t excuse what I did, but I didn’t mean a word of it.”

You want to believe him terribly, but that nagging feeling in the back of your mind is persistent. A reminder that any moment he could decide to stop being Din, and go back to being nothing more than your shadow.

“Why did you say it then?”

You don’t want to have this conversation either. The last thing you want to do is relive those moments but you aren’t an idiot, your insecurities will eventually bubble up, it’s better to take care of this now before it grows into resentment. He’s leaning back again, out of your peripherals.

“I meant it, when I said that I ache.” Is he sitting like that so you can’t look at him? “None of what I’m about to say is a good enough reason to explain my actions, nothing ever could be. You control my every thought and decision, sarad. I suppose I just thought that it would be best if you hated me, that it would make the pain dull, instead it only served to make me realize that I cannot live without you.”

That’s one hell of a proclamation.

“You wanted me to hate you?” As you say it you feel Beskar rest against the back of your shoulder.

“For a while. It seemed like the least painful option. I deserved- deserve, your loathing. At first for feeling the way I did towards a married woman, a woman I was supposed to be protecting and instead was picturing naked.”

Hot. It’s hot in the library. It hasn’t been hot in the library for some time.

“And then I saw the two of you together. And I knew immediately that you did not feel an ounce of love for that thing you were forced to wed. At that point I simply needed you to hate me to soothe the ache that signified that you could never be mine.” He sighs, and there’s a moment of hesitation before you hear the hiss of air you’re becoming all too familiar with. You aren’t exactly sure what you expect, it definitely isn’t the feeling of several kisses being peppered along the curve of your shoulder but you certainly aren’t going to complain about it. “I did not know weakness before I met you, you have turned me from a man made of steel to one of glass.” His voice rings clear and unfiltered throughout the room.

He plants another kiss into your hair, there aren’t any traces of lust behind the action, just a pure adoration, he brushes a bit of your hair out of the way and for a moment you feel the bridge of his nose press against the back of your neck before he places one final, chaste kiss against your spine. When he speaks again his voice is modulated once more.

“I don’t want your forgiveness, I certainly haven’t earned it.” He finally leans forward so he’s back in your field of vision. “But I will. Someday I will be worthy of you, I promise.”

He already is. He always has been.

Will you ever get used to this? His genuine affections? It takes your breath away more than the sex did, the way he talks about you like you are not a woman, but a deity. The way he removes his helmet as if it doesn’t mean anything, just so he can feel you against his lips.

There’s no sense in telling him that’s all you needed to hear. You know him, he won’t accept that, he’s far too stubborn. So instead you opt to make things more lighthearted.

“How do you plan to make it up to me, my kar’ta?” As you say it you can visibly see some of the stress leave his body, thank the gods.

“I have plenty of ideas.” The way he says it makes your heart flutter and you nearly forget that he’s promised not to fuck you. “I was thinking I could take you to the library tomorrow.” You’d be lying if you said that didn’t sort of kill your buzz, considering where you’re currently sitting but he senses your reluctance and chuckles. “The big one, in the city, cyar’ika.”

“Oh.” You can’t help but laugh along with him now. “You know, you’re getting better at talking, about the important stuff that is.” You give him a smile.

“It’s easier when you don’t look at me.” He says it a bit abashedly.

“Why is that?”

“Before you I never felt like someone could see my face. Yet everytime you look at me it’s like I’m not wearing a helmet at all, like you’re staring right at me.” He takes your hand and brings your fingers to the bottom of the helmet, tilting his head down slightly so you can feel his lips as he kisses the pads of your fingers before withdrawing them.

Maker.

Yeah, you’re never gonna get used to that.

Eventually he gets up to find some books, bringing you a mystery romance novel, you wouldn’t normally pick it for yourself but the cover art is interesting enough to draw you in, he appears to have some kind of maintenance guide on ship engines, you have no idea how he reads that kind of thing. As he hands you the books he motions for you to stand, when you do so he sits in the nook horizontally, with his feet up on the cushions, his back leaning against one of the surrounding shelves, motioning for you to sit between his legs.

You want to protest that it won’t be comfortable for him but your resolve simply isn’t strong enough to resist as you crawl between his thighs, your back resting against his chest as you hand his literature to him. The nook isn’t really built for two people to sit like this, it’s a bit cramped but you couldn’t be more comfortable, you want to make sure he’s okay with this position but he’s already got his book open, held in one outstretched hand so you simply open yours, placing it on your bent knees.

It’s surprisingly good. You’ve always had a preference for campy, over the top romance books. The sort of books with shirtless men riding horses on the front. The more ridiculous the better. But you’re completely absorbed by the story you find yourself in, gasping every so often at the reveals.

It’s shocking once you realize you’ve already made it to the last chapter, you had completely forgotten you were lying against Din until you turn and see that he must have finished his book at some point because now he’s reading yours over your shoulder.

“Can we finish this before I take you to get your dinner?” He mumbles, leaning forward slightly.

There is a peace to this situation that you’re sure you’ve never known.

This is the kind of life you could have with him.

You can’t seem to find the words to respond, and the lump in your throat won’t let you make something up so you nod, and you lean your head back against his chest and continue where you left off.

You like the ending. Much to your surprise the story ended happily, you had even teared up a bit when you realized everything was going to work out for the love interests. You might let him pick books for you more often, as long as he lets you find him something less boring to read. There has to be at least one exciting book about ships in here.

If there isn’t, you’ll find him one tomorrow when you go to the city library.

He sits up, which of course means you also sit up. He lets you stand first, your legs are stiff from being in the same position for hours but you find your footing quickly. He seems to be having no issues as he’s putting the books back.

You’re waiting for him to take your hand so you can fetch dinner, the two of you standing in silence for a moment, when it hits you, you feel like an idiot.

He isn’t going to take your hand.

Because you’re leaving the library and someone could see.

You plaster on a strained smile before leaving, thankfully he says nothing about your hesitation as you begin walking towards the kitchens.

Leo is of course waiting for you by the entrance. (You’ve come to accept that he’s simply everywhere at this point.) And you do the same thing you always do, he asks what you’d like to eat, you tell him whatever they’ve cooked, he insists you can request anything you’d like, you insist you’d like what they’ve cooked.

The only difference this time is that you ask for seconds.

He disappears in a huff before swiftly returning with several sealed dishes, as always he hands them to Mando and not you.

✩

The two of you return to your chambers and when he steps inside you lock the door behind you.

“Sit.” You say it as sternly as possible. Like it’s an order. He sets the food on the floor before sitting with his legs crossed next to it. “You’re gonna eat, this is non-negotiable.”

He immediately begins to protest but you shush him.

“You don’t need to feed me anymore. I can take care of myself.” He starts trying to stand but you firmly plant your hands on his shoulders and push him back down.

“Clearly not, you didn’t eat once today, I’m sure of it.” You frown down at him.

“Neither did you.”

“That's because I was watching you! And now to make up for it I’m going to eat real food, not ration packs.”

He doesn’t budge, still staring at you blankly.

“Listen… if you do this, I’ll reward you.” You raise your eyebrows suggestively.

You hadn’t really planned to give in so soon but you’re only human, he had gotten you pretty fired up in the library today whether that was his intention or not.

And you certainly aren’t going to say it, but you miss being with him in that way.

“Are you trying to bribe me with sex?” The disbelief in his voice is apparent, you ignore it, dividing up the food, making sure his portion is considerably larger, they always give you too much food anyway.

“Is it working?” You set the plate in front of him, batting your eyelashes innocently. He coughs nervously, leaning back.

“No. I don’t want sex to be a currency with you, I want you to want it.” His voice is strained and you can’t help but smirk.

“That’s a shame, because you’re going to eat either way.” You stand, walking so you're behind him, sitting back to back, your plate in your lap.

“That’s a wild assumption, princess.” His voice is still modulated so you know he hasn’t made any attempts to listen.

“I thought you were trying to earn my forgiveness?” That shuts him up. He grumbles for a few moments before you hear a hiss and a clunk as he sets his helmet on the floor. “Thank you.”

“Don’t sound so smug, you can only use that reason so many times before I stop giving in.” He mumbles through a mouthful of food, it makes you grin.

“Speaking of your road to redemption, can I ask you any questions I want now?” You swallow a bite as you say it.

“Sure, I’m not going to guarantee an answer, but sure.”

“What was on the flower, the one I gave you for your birthday?” He groans the moment you ask it.

“Please don’t make me say it, I know you know.” He sounds terribly embarrassed but you’re simply furrowing your brow in confusion. Are you supposed to know? You think on it for a few minutes, chewing thoughtfully before your eyes go wide.

“Was that a piece of my nightie that you ripped the first time we-“

“Yes.”

Your face couldn’t possibly get any redder and your smile couldn’t possibly get any wider.

“I didn’t take you for the sentimental type.” You can’t help but tease, he’s so rarely flustered in lighthearted moments like this.

“There are plenty of things you don’t know about me.” You hum softly at his response. “I’d like it if you did know them.” He always has to have the upperhand, he can never just let you tease him without leaving you breathless.

“I’d like to know everything.”

“I’d tell you everything.” He sounds so sincere.

But he doesn’t sound ready.

“When you really want to.”

He’s quiet, briefly, and then he reaches back to set his empty plate down next to you, you aren’t even halfway done with yours. You turn around as he stands, you didn’t hear him put his helmet back on but there it is.

“It’s late princess, I need to go home.”

There’s undeniably disappointment on your face as you stand, following him to the door.

“You don’t want to stay? I’m pretty sure I owe you a reward.” You give him a hopeful smile and his glove covers your eyes, your heart is racing.

There’s that wonderful hiss of air. It’s quickly becoming your favorite sound in the world.

You’re practically vibrating with anticipation.

And then you feel a soft kiss on your forehead.

In an instant the glove is gone and the helmet is back in place as if it had never moved.

“Good night, sarad’ika.” You feel ridiculous as you pout at him.

“You can’t be serious.”

He chuckles as he opens the door.

“Are you really going to turn me down?” You reach past him to try and close it again but he holds it open, still laughing.

“Yes, I am. Tonight I am.” He’s got one foot out the door now.

“Din… I’m giving you permission, I swear, it’s fine.”

“I’m afraid it’s not gonna happen tonight, cyare”

For Maker’s sake you’re practically begging him.

“Then when?” As you ask he leans forward, just a tiny bit.

“When you really want to.”

And just like that he’s leaving, shutting the door behind him.

Cocky bastard.

I am no longer doing taglists so follow @lincolndjarinnotifs and turn on notifications to be notified when new chapters are posted !!

#lincolndjarin #the mandalorian #best kept secret #bks #din djarin #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian x you #din dijarin x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #RE UPLOAD

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see-arcane · 11 months

Text

Oof augh argh my heart

Once again @re-dracula is proving to be THE only Dracula adaptation to do this story and its characters justice

The horror-sting in discovering not only that Dracula is trying to erase his tracks, but that it now has a body count (RIP to his agent)

The exuberance of Mina in Isabel Adomakoh Young's voice as she marches head-on into connecting the vital dots to realize where Dracula is and how to track him--and the ultimate chokehold on her courage and love as she must ultimately part ways with Jonathan for the final rush of the chase

The lacing of audio-action under Van Helsing's dialogue as he dishes out his last group-rousing speech where they're all together

The sharper dramatic tone under Jonathan's words as Ben Galpin finally, finally gets to give full heart-tearing voice to that brief but electric rant at--with biting emphasis--Professor van Helsing--about the danger he means to drag Mina into unexcused and unexplained, hammering home the reminder of what all there is to worry for in the future...

On the heels of that, Galpin and the soundscape design managed to bring new ominous life into something I had previously only half-noticed before:

"Do as you will," said Jonathan, with a sob that shook him all over, "we are in the hands of God!"

[...]

My only comfort is that we are in the hands of God. Only for that faith it would be easier to die than to live, and so be quit of all the trouble.

I never thought of those lines being delivered with such a subtle but disquieting pitch of despair rather than hope. As if the speaker very much does have faith in God, but he only knows so from God's proven fallibility--and knows that same fickle Power is the one carelessly juggling all their fates.

And that ending handful of lines, delivered with such a quiet crushing weight of the eerie:

It is a wild adventure we are on. Here, as we are rushing along through the darkness, with the cold from the river seeming to rise up and strike us; with all the mysterious voices of the night around us, it all comes home. We seem to be drifting into unknown places and unknown ways; into a whole world of dark and dreadful things. Godalming is shutting the furnace door....

The way it's directed, the way it's voiced, the way it's all couched in the sort of cinematic beat of hush before the characters walk blindfolded into some fresh Hell, it all seems to turn over some mental stone in my head to reveal I've been walking past gold with each re-read of the novel.

Just

wow

Wow wow wow this podcast

It makes such a difference. There's so much more flavor and so many more facets in how Re: Dracula delivers the story beyond any mere audiobook, and worlds beyond any adaptation I've ever sat through. A million thank yous to the cast and crew.

Gonna go re-listen again

#so yeah I liked this episode a bit #a smidge #dracula #re: dracula #dracula daily

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gojocp · 1 year

Text

"now playing:.."

cw: fluff, angst(??) in itadori's part featuring: gojo satoru, geto suguru, megumi fushiguro, nanami kento, yuuji itadori

a/n: the way i literally deleted all of the fic and had to redo it. also has anyone read the webtoon 'weak hero' cuz im re-reading it and there are literally ZERO fics abt it. also pls lmk if u find any apocalypse-type jjk or aot fics. lmk how this is!! (i think i turned geto in another version of gojo, i literally cannot write for anyone but him its so sad. also i feel like megumi's made no sense LMAO)

GOJO SATORU: 'always forever' by cults. "you and me.. always, forever!! we could stay.. alone, together!!" ─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"hey, stop! get away suguru!" utahime shouts, running away from the 16 year old. "nope, sorry utahime! no tag-backs!!" he responds, slapping her back and running away.

"fine! screw you!" she shouts, running to haibara and tagging him quickly.

"haibara! get me!" yells suguru, waving his arms. "okay! if you say so!" haibara responds, doing as the upperclassmen says.

"thanks!" he smiles, making a bee-line towards utahime. "stop it! (y/n) help me, please! why aren't you two playing?" she yells.

"we're tired man.." satoru says, resting his head on yours as you lean against his shoulder, eating a popsicle.

"you were sitting there the whole time!" shoko exclaims. "you didn't even do anything." nanami agrees, having yet to be caught.

"if you need some shade you're free to join us." you say. "no thanks, we're actually getting excercise, unlike you guys. so lazy.." suguru responds.

"hey! stop ganging up on us! we'll sit if we want to! get lost!!" satoru shouts.

.・。.・゜✭・.

after 10 minutes of running around some more, the others decide to call it a day and take a seat in the shade of a seperate tree, not wanting to disturb the two of you. and not wanting to deal with satoru complaining.

"hey, this is nice y'know.." satoru starts, "just being alone together, while the others do their own thing. we should do this more often, just the two of us." he continues. "yeah, it's nice." you agree, looking up and placing a kiss on his jaw.

"hey! look at the sunset!" utahime exclaims, directing your attention away from your boyfriend for a moment. "oo, it's so pretty!" you gush.

"yeah," satoru agrees, looking at you. "it is pretty."

0:40 ——|———————— -3:20

GETO SUGURU: 'lovers rock' by tv girl. "and if you're too drunk to drive, and the music is right. she might let you stay, but just for the night" ─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

just like any teenager, suguru believes he can hold alcohol pretty well. he can't.

when shoko sneaks alcohol into the dorms, she convinces the 4 of you to try some. of course, satoru boasts about how well he can tolerate alcohol and challenges suguru to a 'drink off', as he says. after taking a few drinks from his glass, satoru is out cold. shoko decides to put the bottle away and take satoru to his room, leaving you with your drunk boyfriend to take care of.

"please get up, sugu. let me take you back to your room." you say, trying to convince him to get off your lap. "nahh, i'm good." he responds, slurring his words.

"okay fine, stay there then." you say, standing up and leaving him to lay on the floor. "wait-! where are you going? don't leave!" he exclaims, standing up too quickly. you move to catch him, swinging one of his arms over your shoulder to support his weight.

"back to your room, suguru," you respond, "that's where we're going."

"no! i don't wanna." he says stubbornly, wrapping his other arm around you. "wait- stop! we're gonna fall!" you shout. "then we can fall..!" he giggles.

"oh my god, you're so stubborn. i'm taking you to my room." you say, slightly agitated. "ooo, didn't know you were like that." he says, wriggling his eyebrows. 'kill me now.' you think, realizing your mistake, knowing he won't leave you alone about it.

"let's hurry to your room then." he says, leaving a sloppy kiss on your cheek.

you drag him to your room and drop him on the bed and head to the bathroom to do your skincare. when you come back, you find him staring at you, love prominent in his eyes.

"hey, cutie." he flirts with a grin on his lips. "shut up and go to bed." you respond.

"ow, so rude." he says, making himself comfortable under the covers.

"i love you.." he says, giving you a wet kiss on the cheek. "i love you too, go to sleep." you say, facing away from him. he wraps an arm around you and pulls you closer, kissing your nape a few times and snuggling into your neck.

"goodnight.." he mumbles, falling asleep soon after. "goodnight, sugu."

1:20 ————|—————— -3:20

MEGUMI FUSHIGURO: 'see you again' by tyler, the creator. "can i get a kiss? and can you make it last forever..." ─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

it's not often you and your friends get to hang out, often too busy with school work.

"wooo! i love the beach!" yuuji exclaims, chasing nobara as you all make your way to the sand. upon arriving, itadori quickly takes off his shoes and clothes, leaving him in his swimwear and runs into the water.

"guys!! (y/n)!! nobara!! megumi!! come swim!!" he exclaims, waving his arms. "coming!! wait up!" nobara says, running into the water.

after placing the towels and bags on the sand, you and megumi make your way to the water. "ugh! stop splashing me itadori!" nobara yells, splashing water back at itadori.

stepping into the water, megumi holds his hand out for you. "here." he says, offering you his hand. "thank you." you say, smiling at him. "eww! you guys are gross!" nobara says, splashing you with water as itadori joins in, splashing megumi.

"hey!" megumi scolds, throwing a beachball at itadori. "ow! what the hell?" itadori exclaims, as nobara laughs at him. "don't laugh, nobara!!"

"whatever.." she responds, splashing him again and swimming off. "get back here!" says itadori. "never!!" she retorts, getting splashed seconds later.

.・。.・゜✭・.

"oh god.. i'm so tired.." you say, heading back to the dorms. "i need a massage so bad." you continue. "i could give you one when we're back?" megumi offers, the others not being able to hear over their yells and shouts at each other. "i'd like that, thank you!" you beam, giving his hand a gentle squeeze.

after changing your clothes, you lay down and megumi begins massaging the knots out of your back. letting out a sigh of pleasure, you say, "thank you, megumi.." you say, smiling softly. "anytime." he responds fondly.

after a bit of silence, megumi decides to break it. "you know, sometimes i wonder.." if you look both ways when you cross my mind. "yeah?" you urge him to continue. "no, nevermind.." he replies. "you sure?" you ask. "yeah." he says smiling. "okay.." you say, deciding not to push him.

"i'm done.." he says, moving away and tucking you in. "can i get a kiss?" you ask, as he starts to leave. and can you make it last forever? smiling, he walks over and places a soft kiss on your lips. "goodnight.." he says. "goodnight... i love you." you say, smiling up at him. "i love you too." he says, placing another kiss on your cheek and shutting the door behind him.

2:00 ——————|———— -3:20

NANAMI KENTO: 'for the first time' by mac de marco. "it's just like seeing her.. for the first time..again.." ─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

two weeks. it had been two weeks since kento had seen you face-to-face. having to go on a mission out of the country, he wasn't very fond of leaving you alone for a long time. and even though you reassured him over and over, saying "oh, i'll be fine!! don't worry," and "it's only two weeks.. you'll be back in no time." he still worried.

and after two dreadful and godawful (according to him) weeks, he was finally back in japan, handing in his report.

"alright, that's everything. you're free to leave." upon hearing those words, he rushed out and quickly headed home.

"kento?" you asked, when you heard the front door open. "i'm home." he said warmly, with a fond smile etched on his face. 'they're so beautiful, just like when we first met.' running up to him, you wrap your arms around his neck and give him a warm hug, asking "how are you?".

"i'm okay, how have you been?" he asks. "ehh, it's been the same." you respond. squeezes his arms around your waist tighter and places soft kisses on your face.

"what's gotten into you, kento?" you question, laughing softly. "i missed you." he states, placing a final kiss on your forehead. "i missed you too, dear. how about you shower and we can eat? i made your favourite." you say, smiling up at him. "okay.. wait for me, my love." he responds, leaving to go shower.

.・。.・゜✭・.

after eating, you both head to bed and lie down. wrapping your arms around kento, you rest your head on his shoulder and look up at him.

"i missed you kento.." you say sleepily. "i missed you too." he responds. "i love you.." you add, letting sleep engulf you. "i love you too." he whispers, while softly sleeping.

'it's just like seeing her for the first time.. again..'

2:40 ————————|—— -3:20

YUJI ITADORI: "i'll never smile again" by tommy dorsey. 'i'll never smile again...untill i smile at you' ─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

'how did this happen?' he thinks to himself. 'this was supposed to be a grade one curse, where the hell did the special grade come from?'

you and yuuji were paired up to travel to shibuya to excorsise a grade one curse. easy enough, right? WRONG!! like all missions in shibuya, something had to go wrong, and in this case, a special grade appeared. you both tried your best to excorsise it, but all your efforts were futile as you were knocked out, and the curse remained in the city.

it had been two hours since then, another sorceror was sent to excorsise the curse. but yuji didn't care, his partner was unconsious and greatly injured, for heavens sake! you had been impaled in the arm and legs and cursed buds were planted inside you, growing deeper and deeper the more you used cursed energy.

i mean, it was already bad enough that an s grade curse appeared, but know you can't even use cursed techniques? the 15 year old couldn't recall what he had done to deserve this, but that's because he didn't do anything. the world is just cruel.

he couldn't ever imagine smiling or being truly happy in a world without you. you were the love of his life. you were his everything. he couldn't lose you too.

'i'll never smile again, until i smile at you.' he thinks to himself. 'please.. whatever god is up there, please save my partner.. i'm begging you..'

love really is the most twisted curse of all.

3:20 ——————————| -3:20

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nerdyvocals · 1 year

Text

9 People to Know Better (except I'm not tagging 9 people)

I don't normally do tag games, but I got tagged in this twice (by @jealous-kippen and @remmixx, my beloveds <3) so here I am! (also as I'm writing this out I am realizing that while both posts were titled the same way, it looks like they had different question prompts??? So I'm just gonna combine the two)

Favorite Color: Purple! Any shade will have my heart but I am partial to more red-toned purples. (PV, if that means anything to anyone who sees this other than me, you know who you are)

Currently Reading: Three things! In terms of actual books, I've been slowly making my way through the Riordanverse since my university did The Lightning Thief in my second year (first school in my state to do it once the rights were released!) since I somehow never got into Percy Jackson as a kid, and I'm currently on Son of Neptune. I'm also one like my third or fourth re-read of Eurydice by Sara Ruhl, since that's the play I'm designing the costumes for for my senior project. And in terms of fanfic, I woke up to a notification about this yesterday and Actually Screeched.

Last Song: Dial Drunk by Noah Kahan (ft. Post Malone), which was a bit of an accident. I use siri to request music while I'm driving and I asked for Dial Drunk and was singing along until I got jumpscared by the slight difference before Post Malone's verse. Although if you look at my spotify, the ROTPL album has been on repeat for weeks.

Currently Watching (Series): I've been hyperfixated on ROTPL and have watched it over a dozen times at this point, which is probably not healthy, so I put on NCIS last night for background noise while I ate dinner and accidentally watched like six episodes.

Currently Watching (Movie): Saw the Barbie movie the night before the actual opening with my coworkers (We don't cross picket lines people! I was not asked nor invited by any company, and I paid full price for my ticket. There's a one-screen theatre in the town where I'm doing summer stock, this relic from the 50's, and they were able to get access to the film a day early and did a special first come first serve premiere.) and we all sobbed the entire way through.

Current Obsession: Rise of the Pink Ladies. Full stop. I'd seen clips of it when it first aired in April but I was iffy on it in spite of how good it looked. Like most, I'm a little tired of reboots and remakes, and while I did clock Cynthia as being queer within two seconds, (I believe my exact words were "That's either a very butch lesbian or the eggiest egg to ever egg.") I was Convinced it was a queerbait situation. Plus I was nearing finals and didn't have time to get into a new show. But then Crushing Me was trending on tiktok and I realized this was not queerbait, so I put it on to have something playing while I packed for summer stock and it's been the only thing I can think about since mid May. It got me writing fanfic again for the first time in years, if that tells you anything. Speaking of,

Currently Working On: A follow-up to my previous fic, Steady, Steady! I wanted to have it up this week, but it is a behemoth. I'm a little over halfway through my plot outline and I'm at 10,441 words. Fun fact, this will be my longest single-chapter fic so far. Not just in the fandom, not just on AO3, but ever (so far!)

No-Pressure Tagging: @merely-a-player, @penguin-writes-books, @el-fandom-birb, @marley-barnes112, @isweartheyregayyourhonor, and @look-at-those-niceass-rocks (since I've already dragged you back to tumblr kicking and screaming)

#tag game #this was fun #and also longer than I expected

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ofstoriesandstardust · 2 years

Text

forever winter (lt. jake “hangman” seresin)

a/n: i feel like we don’t talk about Jake post-suicide mission enough, so i wrote this. honestly this has been the most difficult thing i’ve ever written and i’m so glad to be done with it. i don't know why introspective pieces about Jake give me so much creative trouble but they do

summary: He knows, that on some level at least, he’s not good enough, no matter how much he pretends to be. So he puts on the facade, the “too good to be true” act, and hope no one sees through the cracks. The cracks though, are getting harder and harder to hide. Because he wasn’t good enough, was he? Sure, he saved them, but he still wasn’t enough. And maybe... maybe he’s not good enough to be here. With them. With the Navy. Maybe it’s time he start to figure out life outside the Navy, re-find and meet Jake, a person he hasn’t seen in so long, since the Hangman persona took over.

Because Hangman’s the reason no one likes him, the reason no one wants him around. They say they do now, but all good things must come to an end. It’s only a matter of time.

And then he meets her.

inspired by taylor swift’s “forever winter” and you should definitely listen while you read it.

main masterlist | top gun: maverick masterlist

warnings: kissing, insecurities, swearing, hurt/comfort, angst with a hopeful ending, panic attacks, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts (if you look very closely), PTSD, child abuse, alcohol, lowkey a character study, as in the relationship is not the main focus, my hometown knowledge pulled through for this one, the author believes men’s mental health needs more attention, gross abuse of italics, i did minimal research about resignation from the Navy

word count: 6,416

The lockers around him open and close as he reviews that day’s training over and over in his head, wondering where he went wrong.

You’re not good enough.

Someone claps him on the shoulder, startling him. He blinks the thoughts away, to see the face of his best friend, looking down at him worriedly. “You coming Hangman?”

He takes a deep breath, running his palms down his flight suit. He still hasn’t changed, the only one.

You’ll never change.

“Nah, nah, I think I’m gonna pass on this one.” Coyote bites his lip, searching for an answer before Rooster’s cutting him off.

“Hangman, you’ve hardly come out with us at all recently. Think you’re avoiding us or something. Decide you’re too good for all us mere mortals?”

Bradshaw’s tone is teasing, meant to be a friendly jab, but Jake’s skin prickles at the teasing regardless. Coyote sighs, grip on his shoulder tightening. His touch burns him.

Coyote deserves better, he knows it. Coyote, who’s been such a good friend, a loyal one. He can already see it, that one day he’ll realize that he’s become so accepted by the rest of the Daggers that- why did he ever really need Jake in the first place?

It’s what Coyote deserves. He wants that for him honestly. To not be dragged down by Hangman anymore, to be confined to the box that puts him in. He hasn’t made it easy for him, he knows.

So better for the break to just be clean, to stop coming around, to stop setting himself up for failure. Sure, they all seem to like him right now, but these things don’t last forever and he knows it’s only a matter of time before they go back to how they were before. He can’t ask Coyote to do that, can’t ask Coyote to go back to living on the island with him, to give up all these great friends he’s made. He doesn’t want to hope that these people might stay his friends, doesn’t know how to.

So he won’t. He won’t let any of that happen. Won’t set himself up for failure once again.

“Hangman?”

It’s Bob’s voice this time.

He swallows, looking up to meet the brown of eyes of the soft-spoken boy of their team. “You good? You zoned out there for a few minutes.”

He stands up, ignoring the looks he’s getting from his team mates, making him want to run and hide. He wants to come up with a witty response, shake the concern, but his mouth feels dry, like it’s full of cotton and he’s blanking on the words that usually come so naturally to him. So instead, he just grabs his shower stuff, shutting the locker behind him, leaving his not-friends-just-coworkers confused and concerned in his wake.

He isn’t sure why he pulled into the parking lot of the bowling alley and arcade, a good twenty minute drive from Miramar without traffic. It’s across town, in El Cajon, and honestly, he isn’t sure why this is where he ended up. He just knows that once he pulled out of the parking lot, drove off base, he picked one direction and drove.

He ignores the fact that he waited for everyone to leave the locker room and even longer in the parking lot to make sure everyone else had gone.

His grip tightens around the steering wheel and then untightens as he swallows, working up the nerve to go inside. He had no business being here, no friends to meet up with.

No friends.

He winces at the thought, letting out a sigh as he turns the ignition off, the car falling silent. He weighs his options, to go inside, to people watch, to eat shitty food, or to go back to an empty home where the silence rages louder than any noisy bowling alley.

The decision is made in a split second and he’s pulling his seatbelt off as he gets out of the car, something fueling every step towards the doors. Pulling them open, he’s immediately greeted by the sounds of bowling balls hitting the lane, the machines returning balls, the music from 2012 only overshadowed by the loud cheers of different groups of friends. He lets his eyes map out the room as he walks towards the food area, stomach jumping at the greasy pizza he can see behind the counter. His eyes skim over the menu, unable to stomach the thought of any of this food.

Never mind the fact that he’s struggled to keep down any food since the mission, unable to bring himself to eat in the first place. He turns, unsure of what to do with himself now that he’s in here. He has no business being here and suddenly it feels like it shows. Like everyone can read him, like everyone knows.

His fingers are twitching as he slides down at a table near the back, looking out at all the lanes. It’s a Tuesday night, so the alley is half-full, maybe. The largest group happens to be at the closest to him, their laughter the loudest thing in the room.

It makes some part of him ache, thinking about how badly he wants that. How badly he doesn’t deserve it.

He thinks of his team, at the Hard Deck, probably a mirror image of the sight in front of him.

They don’t need him.

He blinks, realizing someone’s appeared in front of him. She offers him a small smile as he clears his throat. “Hi.” She says, momentarily pulling one the hands that’s holding her bowling ball to wave at him. “Came to return this, can never pick the right size, but you seem... kind of upset.”

She turns as someone from the group calls her name and she looks over. “Stop talking to strangers!” They shout, laughing. She rolls her eyes, ignoring them.

“Sorry if I’m... being weird or like... creepy? You just seemed kind of upset and you’ve been sitting here all alone, for like, fifteen minutes.”

He blinks, wondering if he’s really been lost in his thoughts for that long. He shakes his head, looking back up to the girl. “I’m good.” He says, forcing a smile. It hurts, makes him dizzy with the force he puts into making it believable.

She tilts her head, clearly not quite believing him. “Well, if you, uh, wanted to join my friends and I, we wouldn’t mind. Unless, you’re waiting on someone, which is totally cool, I just- sorry.” She rushes out, cheeks going an unmistakeable red, even in the dark lighting of the bowling alley.

His chest tightens at the thought of joining her group, the group that’s caught his eye since he got here. Something akin to hope flares in his chest as he realizes she doesn’t know him.

They don’t know you. Not like the team does.

This could be a chance to see if there’s still something in him left worth saving and so he finds himself nodding, standing up from the table. Her smile is bright as she turns, walking back to her table, him trailing a few steps behind. You turn to the group, introducing them all to him. One of her friends, Blaise (he’s pretty sure that’s what she introduced him as), smirks.

“And what’s your friend’s name?”

You pause, turning to him. “I guess I didn’t get your name.”

“Jake.” He says, the words sounding strange on his tongue, so used to introducing himself by his callsign.

They don’t need to know Hangman.

You nod, introducing yourself to him. “Nice to meet you Jake.”

One of the girls, Morgan, joins in with Blaise’s teasing. “So distracted by the attractive man you forgot to get a new bowling ball. It’s your turn, by the way.”

You immediately blush, smiling sheepishly at him. Muttering an apology, you turn and jog back to exchange the ball and jog back in order to take your turn. He takes a few steps back from the group, watching you play as he sticks his hand in the pockets.

It’s not good.

The ball barely stays in the lane before slipping into the gutter as your friends boo. You walk back to the group as Blaise gets up to take his own turn.

“You’re not very good at this.” He says, the words slipping out of his mouth before he can stop them.

He winces, waiting for you to immediately rescind the nice gesture that had been you inviting him over here. Instead, you just laugh, nodding your head. “Oh extraordinarily. But I got outvoted tonight.”

“Outvoted?”

“Oh, we just sort take a vote to decide where we go on nights out. Or nights in, depending. But the consensus was the bowling alley, and I lost 5-to-1. I’d much rather be next door at the arcade. Consider myself a Skee-ball champ.”

“Oh yeah?” You nod, confirming. “Well, why don’t we go find out?” He says, some of his confidence returning to him. He isn’t sure where it’s coming from, haven’t seen it in weeks. Months, if he’s honest with himself.

Not since Mitchell passed him up.

You smile. “Alright, I’ll take you up on that.” You nudge Morgan, telling her where you’re going, and she nods as the two of you head over to the arcade. The arcade is even quieter than the bowling alley, leaving the three Skee-ball lanes completely open for the two of you. He stares at the machine as you wander off to get tokens, realizing he’s never played Skee-ball in his life.

Not like there was all that much in his hometown, and the best escape from his Dad was drives to the next town over, which was only marginally better in that they had a movie theatre that played four movies instead of three.

You reappear at his shoulder, counting through the tokens in the little cup. You hand them to him, setting the rest of your stuff off to the side. “So, how do you play?” He asks nervously, fighting to keep them hidden from his voice. He pretty sure he fails. “We didn’t have an arcade where I grew up.”

You don’t tease him, just explain the game to him as he feels the tokens grow sweaty in his palm. It’s simple enough, and if they let him fly the multi-million dollar planes for a living, he’s sure he can figure out an arcade game.

May not be flying for much longer.

He squeezes his eyes shut at the thought, willing himself to listen to you instead of his thoughts for once.

“So where are you from Jake?”

“Texas. You?”

“I’m a native San Diegan. ‘Bout as Californian as they get.”

He nods. “You should meet my buddy Rooster. He embraces the fact that he’s also from San Diego. Annoys the shit out of our team.”

“Rooster?” You ask curiously, scoring another set of points. You look up at him, raising an eyebrow as he cringes, realizing he’s let the man’s callsign slip, and then looking down at the ball still in his hand. He hasn’t even started playing.

“Work for the Navy as a pilot. We use callsigns.”

You nod. “Oh, gotcha. One of my family friend’s worked on the Midway before it was decommissioned and turned into a museum.”

In all honesty, he hasn’t been to the Midway, even though he’s been stationed permanently in Miramar for the last six months. No point in driving out there to see the inside of a decommissioned aircraft carrier when he’s seen more of those than his own house in his life.

You don’t say anything more. Usually, when girls learn he works for the Navy, they’re drooling at his feet, wanting him to tell them some epic story, usually trying to slip their way into his bed. Usually, it works.

Jake tosses the ball up, finally deciding to start playing.

He isn’t sure how long the two of you stand there playing, but it’s long enough that his legs begin to ache, even though he’s begging himself to ignore it, wanting to stand here for a few minutes more with you. It was easy. You never pushed, always just listening. Returning his competitive streak, you offered him kind smile and a loud laugh when he beat you.

It was simple, not like the push-and-pull of his team. It was a simplicity he could see himself getting used to.

Blaise appears at your shoulder and you turn to him as you pause your throw. “I know you’re enjoying your time with your new attractive man-friend, but we’re headed out and I am your ride.” Before Jake can open his mouth to say he could drive you, Blaise is giving him a once over and turning back to you. “And I’m not in the business of letting one of my friends wander off into a car to be murdered by a strange man she met in the bowling alley, so we’re going.”

Jake turns, trying to remind himself that it’s not personal. Entirely reasonable. He wouldn’t let Phoenix or Halo wander off alone and get into a car with a random man they met in a bowling alley either.

You sigh, tossing the last ball into the machine, the score flashing across the top. He isn’t sure if it’s his ears that are ringing or the machine as you take your purse from Blaise. “Give me a second. I’ll meet you at the car.”

Blaise eyes you and then Jake. “Five minutes and then I’m coming back inside and you’re not getting a choice. I’m setting a timer as we speak.” You concede, waving him off. You sigh, turning back to him.

“Sorry, you date one shitty man and it’s game over.” You shake your head. “Anyways, it was really nice to meet you Jake.” He can’t bring himself to say anything, a lump forming his throat. Can hardly bring himself to breathe. “Um, if you wanted- I could give you my number? I’d love to see you again. Unless this is weird and you think I’m weird and you never want to see me again-”

“I’d love your number.”

You smile through a deep breath, sliding your phone out of your back pocket to let him enter his number. He does, noting the time and swallowing as he saves the contact. “Well, it was nice to meet you Jake.”

He nods, realizing he hasn’t thought about his shitty day since you walked over to his table two hours ago. “You as well.”

He really doesn’t believe you’ll text him. It was just a passing thing, nothing more than a moment. Yet there your text is the very next morning, asking if he wants to join you for the farmers market in La Mesa on Saturday. His fingers fly over the keyboard, confirming he’ll meet you there, bright and early.

It gives him something to look forward to, something outside the team he doesn’t really feel a part of. Maybe this is his chance to cut the cord, to walk away, before someone gets hurt.

He feels himself being pulled back down to Earth by the thought of seeing you, of your texts, sending him pictures of your family dog and the sunset from your backyard. He reciprocates, sending back pictures of the dinner he cooked (because that’s the new thing he’s trying, cooking, as he tries to sort out his life) and the book he picked up after work that day, because that’s the other new thing he’s trying too. Anything to keep the thoughts at bay, from making a decision he can’t unmake. From doing something he’ll regret, even though right now it’s looking like the best thing.

If the team notices a change in his behavior, they don’t say anything, though Rooster is always at his wing when they fly, Javy hovering. Jake hasn’t been to the Hard Deck in days and ignores the Dagger group chat as Saturday morning rolls around.

The farmers market is the perfect balance of quiet and busy, bringing him a moment of calm in a stormy week. Stormy couple of months. The conversation is easy, you telling him about all the years you (and your siblings) went to preschool in the neighborhood as the two of you pick through old records and fresh fruit. He observes the obvious fact that the Saturday farmers market is part of your routine as you chat with the family that sells locally-grown honey. His heart clenches at the thought you letting him slip into your life and routine so easily.

It’s as you’re picking through flowers for your house, asking for his opinion that he realizes this is too delicate, too fragile, to push the boundaries.

When asked if you should get the sunflowers or wildflowers, he blurts out that he can’t date you. He isn’t sure why he says it aloud, although he knows that the words are too true. He’d break you and he’s done ruining things. Ruining people.

You just nod and assure him that it’s okay, that you’re not looking to date either. That you’re always open to a new friend. He swallows and nods, telling you to get the wildflowers. That they suit you.

Wild with a quiet beauty.

The friendship grows from there, a lunch out at the Mexican restaurant just across the street from the market to a Sunday brunch turning into Taco Tuesday to drinks on Friday to another Saturday farmer’s market with lunch afterwards. He finds himself leaning more and more into your friendship, pulling farther and farther from his team mates.

They don’t need him anyways.

Nights away from the Hard Deck turn into weeks as he spends the time with you instead. Sometimes your friends join, sometimes it’s just the two of you. Your friends have warmed up to him, welcoming him into the group naturally. Even Blaise has settled in, joking with him, letting him into what has been a years-long friendship.

He’s sure the Daggers don’t miss him around. Don’t miss his competitive streak, his arrogance, his jabbing and prodding and poking.

They were better off without him.

Maybe Javy does, always feels the man hovering, waiting for Jake to talk about where he’s been disappearing off to when his feet hit the ground. But it’s been a while of this and even if Javy missed him at the beginning, he probably doesn’t miss him now. Too happy with his finally solid friendships to miss the one that had kept him out of the group in the first place.

He’s better off without him.

He knows what he has right now is fragile, delicate. One wrong move could send you spiraling out of his life with the door slamming shut behind you. He tries his best to let you go before he could hurt you, because that’s what he does. You don’t let him though, always encouraging him to stay, to talk about what’s bothering him.

He hadn’t even mentioned that anything was wrong.

He doesn’t mention that it’s been getting harder these days. That everyday he gets closer to walking away from the team, before someone can get hurt, before he can get someone killed.

The only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.

He knows what he has right now is fragile, delicate. He can’t act on the feelings simmering just below the surface, can’t act on his desires. You’re too good. He’ll ruin you. It’s only a matter of time before you see what everyone else does, before you leave. No one stays.

It’s quiet the night he finally caves, fingers sliding over the call button before he can lose his nerve.

He needs you.

The phone rings once, and then twice, and- shit is it really three am?

He goes to click the red button, to end the call, say it was an accident and sorry for bothering you when it clicks, signaling that you’ve answered.

“Hello?”

He doesn’t answer, suddenly forgetting how to breathe.

“Jake? You okay?”

He wants to answer, but he can’t remember how.

Why had he called you again?

“Jake? You’re worrying me. Is everything okay?”

He begins to pace again, crossing the shitty hardwood of his shitty rental, as he runs a hand up to pull through his blonde hair. Tugs at the roots, as he tries to remember what he wanted to say. “I can’t do this anymore.” He finds himself saying, because it’s true.

He can’t lead this team, can’t be here, shouldn’t be in the Navy. He’s not good enough, never enough.

If was enough, Mitchell would’ve chosen him as wingman. Mitchell would’ve trusted him.

He hadn’t. Had trusted Rooster instead.

If he’d been enough, he would’ve been faster. Wouldn’t have had so close of a shot, would’ve been there with plenty of time.

“Okay... Is it work stuff? You wanna talk about it?” Your voice is soft, kind, and he tugs at his hair harder.

He’s going to ruin you. He’s sure of it.

Only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.

“I’m sorry.” He says flatly instead. “I shouldn’t have- it’s late.”

“It’s fine.” You say automatically. “I was up anyways. What’s going on? Do you want me to come over?”

“No, I’m fine. I shouldn’t have called.”

“Jake-”

“Goodnight.”

He ends the call before you can protest, struggling to breathe as he lets the phone fall from his grip as he tugs at his hair again. He barely hears the phone clatter to the floor over the ringing in his ears, his chest tightening.

Panic attacks aren’t new to him lately, but this one brings him his knees as he realizes how badly he needs you. How much he doesn't want to let you go. How much he knows he has to.

It isn’t fair to you, to ruin you. To hurt you. He needs to get out, before he can hurt anyone else.

Only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.

He sits there, back pressed up against the foot of his bed as his ears never stop ringing. The night passes him by, dawn rolling in, bringing pink splashes through the cracks in his blinds.

He should be getting ready for work when the phone rings again. He watches numbly as your name crosses his phone. He lets it ring once, and then twice. It rings a third time and then the screen flashes bright with a text.

I’m worried.

What’s going on?

Jake, are you okay?

Jake, answer me.

His chest aches at the hurt and worry he’s causing you. What he swore not to do.

Fine. Just stressed about work.

Never mind, didn’t mean to worry you.

Sorry.

He clicks the phone on do not disturb, pulling himself up from the ground. His limbs protest, his chest still feeling tight. He shouldn’t fly today, shouldn’t go into work.

Shouldn’t go into work ever again.

He swallows as he changes.

It’s only a matter of time before the Navy agrees.

His skin feels taut as he goes through the motions of the day, running on no sleep and pure nerves.

He started off his day right, slipping the paperwork into Admiral Simpson’s office and ending his pre-flight checks in Mitchell’s office, being asked what the hell is this?

I think you know exactly what that is sir.

He’d fumbled the trainings for the day, leading to Phoenix yelling at him over the comms. All he could hear in his head, over and over again, was Javy’s disappointed sigh over the comms as he left another person behind.

The water of the shower is scorching his skin as it falls over him, his head resting against the tile. Distantly, he can hear his teammates, chatting amongst themselves. His fingers twitch as he thinks about calling you, asking you to come over. He stretches them out as he thinks about what it would like to come home to you, pull you close to him, and just rest.

His chest aches at the thought of all that he can’t have.

He turns the shower off, pulling himself out of his daze as he walks to his locker. He hears the door to the locker room slam open as he pulls his pants on but he doesn’t turn. It catches his attention when his body is being shoved against the locker, causing their team mates to protest and stand up, moving to stand between the two of them.

It’s Bradshaw.

“What the hell man? I thought we were a team.”

Jake raises an eyebrow, ignoring the way his shoulder is protesting at the sudden collision against the metal lockers. “What are you on about?”

Bradshaw, Rooster, is seething. “You know exactly what I’m on about.”

He rolls his eyes, pushing himself off the locker and swatting Payback’s hand away. “If you’re really that mad about training today, get over it.”

Rooster turns to Coyote, who’s watching the two of them warily. “Did you know?”

“Know what?” Hangman almost grimaces as he turns back around, opening the locker up to pull his shirt over his head.

Time’s up. Secret’s out.

“Seresin’s leaving us.”

He forces himself to chance a glance at Coyote, who looks nothing short of betrayed.

“What, decide you’re too good for our team?” Fanboy teases, but he can hear the hurt underneath the joke all the same.

“This why you haven’t been hanging out with us?” Omaha asks, settling on the bench.

“You know, my world does not revolve around me going to the bar with you people and listening to Bradshaw play the same shitty song from the ‘80s and playing the same game of pool over and over again. I’ve got better things to do with my time.”

He’s being cruel now, he knows it. Pulling at any frayed thread, to make the whole thing come unraveling. To say, look it was never meant to work in the first place.

Rooster takes a step back from him. “C’mon man, I thought we were friends.”

“Don’t kid yourself Bradshaw. How do you even know anyways?”

“Mav told me.”

He almost scoffs. “Of course he did.”

“He wants you to stay.”

He wants to roll his eyes and turn away. “That’s not his decision. Nor is it yours.”

“Hangman-”

“You know, it’s really none of your business whether or not I want to stay in the Navy. Nobody’s business where I go after I leave here. We’re not friends.” He snaps, not missing the way Coyote’s body language changes from defeated to guarded.

“So much for all those years we haven’t been friends Seresin.” Coyote mutters, turning away from him.

His heart cracks at that, soul stinging in the way he’d let Hangman take over, to push these people away. “Coyote-”

“Just forget it Bagman.” Bob says, his own hurt coloring the words as his arm slings over Coyote’s shoulder as the two of them turns towards the door. Rooster shoots him one last look before he’s grabbing his bag, following them out the door.

He can do little but watch the way the team filters out of the locker room, all tossing him looks of hurt and anger as they leave for the day. Finally, he sinks down, head in his hands as he thinks about what he’s done.

The only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.

You’re waiting for him as he pulls into his driveway, sitting on his front porch. He sighs as he slips out of his truck, shutting the door behind him.

He doesn’t want to do this with you now. Not today. Not after he sat in Mitchell’s office, being told he couldn’t resign without a valid reason. Couldn’t look the man in the eye all day after the conversation that morning. He still wasn’t sure how the paperwork had ended up on his desk so quickly, in matter of thirty minutes or less, but the day had made him feel hopeless.

There was no out. Nothing left for him.

The only place you’ll lead anyone is an early grave.

He wordlessly unlocks the front door, leaving it open behind him for you as he walks towards the kitchen, pulling the whiskey out of the cabinet. He hears the front door shut as he knocks the liquid back, gritting his teeth at the burn. He hasn’t medicated the pain away with alcohol since you came into his life but he’s feeling his control slip after the day he’s had.

“Jake.” You say, appearing next to him. He pours himself another shot, but you pry his fingers off the glass before he can down it. He lets you, reveling in your soft touch.

Won’t get that for much longer.

“Jake, you scared me last night.”

“Sorry, won’t happen again.” His words are cold, detached, as he wills himself to do this one last thing.

“Hey, it’s okay. We’re friends. We-”

“You should leave.”

You jerk back, fingers leaving his own as if they had burned you. “What?”

“You heard me.” His voice doesn’t feel like it’s his own, floating somewhere above him as some part of desperately begs him to stop.

“Jake, something’s clearly wrong. I’m not leaving you.”

“Well, I don’t want you here.”

“Well, too fucking bad because you’re my friend and I want to be here for you.”

He cautiously raises his eyes to meet your own.

You want to stay? For him?

Where would he even start though?

I tried to resign from the Navy today?

My Dad used to hit me?

One of my not friends, co-worker at best, almost died because I wasn’t fast enough?

If I stay, someone’s gonna get killed because of me?

“I don’t know what to say.” He whispers and you nod.

“That’s okay.” You say softly, hand returning to his. “Why don’t we go sit down? You don’t have to talk, but let’s just sit.” He nods, letting you guide him to the couch. He thinks he can count on one hand all the times he’s sat on the piece of furniture. You don’t let go of him as you both sit.

He can’t meet your eye, can’t begin to tell you the truth. If you knew, you’d run.

Maybe that’d be best.

“You should go. I’ll only hurt you.” He says quietly, turning away from you.

“Jake.”

“’M not good. I- I hurt people. I ruin them. I- You need to leave.” His voice is begging now, pleading with you to see reason.

“Jake, look at me.” You say softly. “You don’t ruin people. You’re so good, so so good. I can’t believe you don’t see it.”

“I tried to- I need to-”

The words are trapped in his chest and it feels like he’s choking. Like if he speaks the words, he’ll be giving him the rope to hang himself with.

“It’s okay. We don’t have to talk. It’s alright.”

So he swallows, nods, and sits there. Allows himself to let you touch him. To rub your thumb over his shoulder blade as his head falls back against the couch.

It’s some time again before you speak.

“One of my friends in college was in the Marines.” You say quietly. “Not the same thing as the Navy, I know, but still. He wouldn’t talk about it, even if he was asked. I don’t know if he ever learned to talk about it.” He turns to look at you, even as your movements don’t cease. “We had lost touch after we graduated but-” You shift, shaking your head. “Something I’ve been thinking about lately. You don’t talk to me much about your work. ”

He swallows, watching you as you watch him. You don’t say anything more and he realizes you’re opening the door for him to talk about it. About all of it.

“There was this mission.” He feels himself begin to say, voice almost detached from him. He can’t bring himself to look away from you. “Almost a year ago now. Reason I got stationed out here. We- we weren’t meant to come home. One of my fr- coworkers almost died.” You just wait, listening, and he takes that as encouragement to continue. You haven’t run away yet. “He said something, about how the only place I’ll lead anyone is an early grave. Can’t help but feel like he’s right.”

Your touch burns him, eyes staring into his soul as he wrestles with himself to lay it all bare in front of you. He pulls away, standing up to pace the small living room. You let him, simply just watching him.

“I’m going to get them killed. There’s a reason I wasn’t selected to fly the mission. I’m- I’m gonna hurt them, gonna get someone killed. I shouldn’t be there. I’m not good enough and it’s going to cost someone their life.”

His hands reach up to his hair, going to tug at it again, the familiar feeling of trying to ground himself as everything spins out of his control.

“I- I feel out of control all the time. I can’t look them in the eye. I feel like I can’t breathe up there, that the only time I’m safe is on the ground. They don’t need me anyways.”

He chances a glance back to you and every part of your face is screaming pitypitypity

He doesn’t need your pity.

“I wanted to resign from the Navy. My CO told me no.”

You finally break your silence, shifting up. “I’m sorry, he told you no?”

He waves you off, starting a new round of pacing. “He needs a valid reason.”

“A valid reason? What’s more valid than I want to-?”

“Leaving is complicated and there’s a lot of paperwork, you have to have all these forms and a letter-”

“That a big decision, Jake.” You breath out, interrupting his explanation, moving to the end of the couch, looking like you might walk over to him. He hopes you don’t, despite how badly he wants to be next to you. “Are you sure of this?”

He pauses, feeling the tears sting his eyes.

He will do anything to not break right now. Not in front of you.

Bitterly, he can hear his Dad in the back of his head, reminding him how weak he is.

Real men don’t cry.

“I just don’t know what else to do.” He whispers, afraid of the words he’s speaking into the night. “I just need it all to stop.”

That’s what propels you off the couch as you walk over to him, wrapping your arms around him. The feeling of you holding him close makes him buckle as his resolve cracks and crumbles, the tears taking over as his knees sink to the floor. His sobs rack his body as he reaches up to clutch tightly at your shirt. You run your fingers through his hair as you try to soothe him.

“Jake, I-” You swallow, your hand stilling in his hair.

Here it comes. When you tell him this is too much, that you didn't sign up for this, that he should never contact you again-

You kneel to be eye-level with him, pulling his face into your hands. “Jake, I am so sorry. You deserve so much better than that. And I wish there was something more I could do for you, more for me to say. All I can say is that it’s going to get better. Things will always get better and I will be here to help you. I’ll always be here.”

He swallows, wanting so badly to believe your words. He almost does, if he squeezes his eyes shut and forces his Dad’s words out of his brain. “I want to believe you. I don’t know how.”

“That’s okay. I’m here, Jake. I’m not going anywhere.”

“You can’t fix me. You can’t make me better.”

The words are blunt, cruel. You don’t flinch away or move back.

“I don’t want to.” You move closer to him. “I just want to help you. Let me help you.”

Without thinking, he surges forward, kissing you before he can think about the consequences of his actions. He knows in the half-second before you freeze that he’s fucked up.

You pull away, ducking your head as your bottom lip catches between your teeth. Neither of you say anything as your chests heave with what just happened, unable to meet the other’s eyes. Your hands haven’t left his face as you swallow, finally pulling up to look at him.

“Jake-”

He shakes his head, pulling out of your grasp to stand again. “Don’t. Don’t. Please don’t. I shouldn’t have and I’m sorry.”

You stand too, sighing. “Jake, please-”

“Just go.” His voice wavers, cracking, a reflection of how he feels on the inside.

“Jake, this isn’t- Now’s not a good time-”

“Don’t make excuses. You don’t return my feelings and that fine. Just- get out, please.” His back is still turned from you as he waits for your footsteps to signal that you’re going to leave, just like everyone else. He succeeded in driving you away.

He does hear your footsteps but they don’t leave through his front door. No, there you are, figure blurry in front of him through the tears he’s been trying to suppress.

“Jake.” You softly, and he feels his lip tremble as he wraps his arms around himself, wanting to make himself small. “It’s not that I don’t return your feelings and I’m not saying never, but- you’re going through a lot right now. You need a friend, not a new relationship, and I’m happy to be here in whatever capacity I can be for you. You deserve the world Jake Seresin and I’ll be here no matter what.”

Your hands reach to his face and he allows his hands to unwrap from around his body, pulling you close to him. His head falls into the crook of your neck as he takes a shaky breath. “Don’t leave.” The words are muffled against your skin. “Please.” The words are like a prayer as he grips you ever so tighter.

“Never. Believe me Jake, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

For the first time in months, he takes what feels like his real breath, feeling like he isn’t drowning under the waves of his own mind.

For the first time in months, he allows himself to consider that things might actually turn out okay.

#jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin fics #jake hangman seresin fic #jake seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin fics #jake seresin fic #top gun maverick #top gun maverick fics #jake seresin x female!reader

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melonteee · 4 months

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I've been rewatching One Piece and oh my lord it is SO GOOOOD on a rewatch dude holy shit! When i first watched One Piece, I was suuuper impatient I guess?? Because I remember getting annoyed at so many arcs for "dragging on" but as I'm watching now, I don't even know what I was talking about ?? I think subconsciously, one piece has made me realize how short my own attention span is and how annoyed I get when I don't have all the information laid out to me on a silver platter lol but I genuinely believe one piece has made me a more patient person in general because oda just knows how to piss me off and then make me feel kind of embarrassed about it because I'm used to not trusting writers I guess 😅 idk I just remember not liking punk hazard very much but damn I'm really enjoying the ride now. Thank you for reading my rant lol

This is exactly it! One Piece is fantastic on a first watch, and even better on a re-watch! It's why when people complain about pacing issues in One Piece, I truly do not understand what they're talking about. There's not been a single moment in One Piece where I've thought "Oh my god, get on with it!" because we get NEW INFORMATION! ALL THE TIME! And the 'slower bits' do WONDERS for the world building!

It definitely comes down to impatience, so many people speed through One Piece to 'catch up', and it frustrates them. But if you just enjoy the ride, everything you see and everything you hear...is important! You get such fun little insights of an island's culture, life and environment that really makes One Piece feel lived in. And if it's not about the island, it's about the characters we meet!

Any time One Piece's pacing is complained about, I always have to wonder WHAT these people are watching One Piece for? If you only like ONE character, and you're WAITING for that ONE character to come back? OF COURSE you'll complain about the pacing!

If you're only in it for the fights, and all you WANT is fights, YOU'RE GONNA COMPLAIN ABOUT THE PACING! This is why I think Skypiea is complained about SO MUCH! Because the fights are few and far between, and EXTREMELY unconventional for how a shonen usually works in terms of pairing characters off to fight! I will die on the hill that Skypiea does not have pacing issues, I NEVER know what ANYONE means when they say that, ALL of Skypiea had my eyes BIG and BULGING at what I was seeing!

Oda is very good at planting information, letting us sit with it for a LONG time, and bringing it back up when it's relevant again. It's why I have a giggle when people go "ODA FORGOT THIS" or "ODA DOESN'T CARE ABOUT THIS!"

Oda has not forgotten anything, Oda DOES care about what he's added, he's just waiting for the right time to bring it back! One Piece really does make you more patient, because you realise a good story doesn't mean presenting a TEDTalk full of exposition. It means building a world, journeying with our protagonists, and going on an adventure with them!

#ask #melonask

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voidwritesstuff · 22 days

Text

A Heart beat away

CW: rot,decay,animal death and worms. A lot of angst and comfort.

Summary: In humanity's new home, Fury tries to reach out to her siblings from deep within her heart.

A/N: Does this count as strife september? hes got a few scenes and mentions here (no spoilers). @darkdemeter hey there Dem, youre in for one fluffy and brotherly love filled fic. (I got emotional re-reading this when I was doing my onceover, so you know its gonna hit hard/LH/HJ)

Fury had visited this realm exactly once. It was,perhaps, the one mission she didnt have to slay her way to get done what she needed to.

Now in hindsight,the realm is quite like earth,green pastures,bovine looking animals and a few lakes scattered. The Few difference laid in mostly the Flora of this place,And the fact that as far as she knew there were very few villages.

She sits now at the edge of one of the lakes where the few humans shes now in charge of lived their lives as best as they could. She looks down at her reflection on the water before her and realizes she...looks exhausted.

A sigh leaves the black rider,as she unclasps the amulet gifted by Death. She traces the carvings, feeling the divots and edges of the runes since her gauntlets are tossed to her side with her shoes and shin armor.

The coolness of the water feels nice against the skin of her feet and calves. Few were the moments of rest she got,there was always something she could do or help with back at the village but now she can just relax since humanity has kind of settled in their New home.

With this moment of respite, comes thought. Usually,thoughts have landed her in identity crisis as her journey on earth has so ungracefully shown her. But this one might just be the worst,because as her eyes linger on the amulet she notices her mind drifts to her siblings.

First,of course, is Strife.

When they were children,before all hell broke loose in Eden,they were quite the pair. He had her back at all times, he had returned home with a broken nose just to defend her honor. Strife has always been the sibling she was closest to,at least in recent memory. To younger fury he was...her knight in shining amor,just Like the old fairytales she was told growing up.

Strife...has always had a way to make his sister feel seen,hes never been afraid of putting her in line for her own good even if she complained about it. He has dragged her away from fights she was too small to take on,And always made sure she was okay.

So now she wonders,is he okay? Was he still fending off demons back on earth? Was he hurt?.

Once again he was saving her,that persona of the knight still gleaming through gruff witt and the blood thirsty ringing and roar of his pistols.

Her eyes close as she begins to feel them burn a little,her breath shakes as the crushing worry that has been lingering within her begins to show its face. Fury has never been one to cry,even before the nephilim massacre, but Now she finds herself in need of tears and sadness.

Was she burrowing worry from the future?Was she mourning? If so what exactly was she lamenting the loss of? Her brother or the brotherhood she shared with him?

Regret,thats what began to accompany her sadness. Why didnt she spend more time with him when she had the chance? Had she known he was Jones,would she have acted differently at all?

God,perhaps she has been a bigger asshole than she thought she was. Despite her antagonism towards everyone,specially Death, she now realizes that she just...misses her brothers.

It feels like a lifetime ago,when they were still family and this old world was so,so young. The memories of playing in the mud,of strife braiding her hair in intricate styles, the silliest jokes they would whisper eachother in the dead of night when neither could sleep, the way he would rock side to side when he hugged her...it feels like it didnt happen to her at all.

But it had happened,how could she forget?

How clouded was her judgement to forget the things she had lived?.All the good memories she has forgotten and all the love she denied to have for her brothers. Deep down she knows she felt unfit, ashamed,of relying so heavily on her siblings.

All her life she has been called the dumb one,irrational. No wonder she had the need to prove herself,to go above and beyond even if it hurt and burnt those around her.

Even if she had been told to ignore the stinging words. She wonders if any of her siblings saw something in her that she did not.

Strife sure as hell did.

"In other words,you have lived" he told her after her confession of how she has been all that the deadly sins stood for. Its really mind boggling how she reached this Age and only now has she lived.

--By creator,I can almost hear the 'I told you so' -- she murmured to the wind as if her siblings could hear,its tinted with shame of herself but also fondness. It wouldnt be the first time her brothers were horribly right, and the memories of those times warms up her chest.

Perhaps they could hear her,through the Bond of the vow they took when they became the horsemen. If so she wouldnt be surprised to find them snickering And trying so save face.

However,She has never used the properties of this Bond. She doesnt know how to reach out. Thats what she gets for dismissing Death's teaching- As talented as she was with magic she really had been a stubborn mule of a student.

Perhaps its desesperation that overpowers the paralysis of not knowing how to interact with this Bond.

Fury closed her eyes,holding the Nephilim's Respit tight and focusing on her breath. She slowly feels the world fall away,her heartbeat drumming in an endless blackness whilst also thundering in her ears.

Slow beats fill the void,she sees nothing but herself standing there unsure. But Still her brain is fresh with the memories of her second eldest brother,the laughter,the bickering, old and New she holds those memories to her heart and whispers...

--Hello?

Her voice echoes, grows in pitch and suddenly the empty ebony world seems so small. Her steps are soft and unsure as she walks forward, or what she thinks is forward.

No answer comes but she sees a Long Hall of Mud bricks stained with paint. She...recognized those scribbles, which makes her turn to her right to see a beaded curtain of red.

Widened eyes begin to show the realization within herself. She turns behind her to see a dining room,a rickety old sofa and a Burning fireplace. It smells of dry herbs and that Musk Death has always carried of dead leaves during misty mornings.

It all just pushes her to Keep walking,she sees then a beaded curtain of an odd,splochy Pink. She remembers now it was all hand made,and Pink pigment was hard to attain but Death had tried his damnest to give her that indulgence.

A few more steps and shes before yet another set of blinds,the one she has been looking for. Its maroon, the color easier to make with black,red and a bit of blue pigment.

She clears her throat,feeling like this whole house is bigger than she is.--...hello?-- she hugged the amulet to her chest,feeling safe with it in her grasp.

--Fury...?--Comes the voice of strife,suddenly the air smells of Gunsmoke,the scent hits and it takes her a second to recompose from whats essentially a horse's kick to the nose in smell form

Yet theres an odd ring in the tone,it started off gruff and sounding like it belonged to a grown nephilim,but then it thinned out and cracked like a teenager.

In that moment she realizes where she is. Its her old home back in...somewhere. But before her is strife's room,and if she wasnt mistaken it always looked like a tornado of messyness came over the small bedroom.

--Strife!--She called out,her voice too now childish. Uncoordinated steps make her rush past the courtains that click and clack together with each bead that flows around her face like hanging vines against a breeze.

The decor is lost on her,disorienting like overlapping memories. And the only thing that isnt a blurr is,of course,Strife.

He wears normal,rudimentary clothes. He smiles a fanged grin and says-- Hey,there you are you runt. -- but then her saddened expression registers And he asks-- why the long face?

No doubt in her mind, the female nephilim runs to him and hugs him. The amulet falls to the floor unbroken and her arms grasp him.

--Oh WOAH! Woah easy,easy...--his hands card through her hair, the motion soothing. Its been so long since she has felt the touch of her siblings. He rocks side to side to calm her--Was it those idiots again? Did they pick on you?

Fury knows this is a vivid memory,she tries to push past it by burying her head against her brother's crook of the neck. His words slowly quieten,lowering in pitch until its no longer within her hearing range.

Leaving one only sound,her heartbeat.

She must have lingered there for hours,it certainly felt like it. Was she doing this the right way? What else was she supposed to do? Did she miss a step?

Panic began to grow within her,ready to pull away to at least seek confort in the memory she had plunged herself into.

Her ears ring and suddenly her heartbeat bursts in a dry boom that leaves her deaf and only being able to feel her pulse though her shattered eardrums.

A rapid Fire thrumm that sits between her ears,a choir that only she hears amidst being deaf. Like frenzied violins that tell her to pull back,but shes unable to.

Soon she finds out why.

Within her chest another heartbeat joins,steady Like a low drum. Curiosity overshadowed Fear as she centered in that feeling.

Thats not her pulse.

Her eyes blink with surprise as things begins to click into place,followed by the smell of gunpoweer and smoke.

--Fury?--Came the voice of a very adult strife right behind her. She turns and sees his brother,armor chipped but still standing. His voice cuts through the deafening ringing,bringing her world to a steady foundation once more when she was just about ready to freak out.

Always coming to her rescue.

--Strife! Oh thank the creator!--She whipped around and hugged her brother-- why in the nine hells was it so hard to reach you?!

The gunslinger snorted,hugging back-- thats what you get for zoning out during lectures.

--Like you fared any better

He snickered--hm,fair-- His grip tightens and his voice lowers as he revels in the embrace--This thing wont last long. Lissen,im fine. Are you okay? Are the humans safe?--he sounds..not amused at this experience,perhaps he had fared better in hearing Death's teaching.

Fury nodded-- we're just fine. Im...fine..

--Y'dont sound fine.

She shrugged and melt into the hug,shoosing her brother when he tried to speak. Even if hes a little pressed about it, he understands the message shes trying to convey.

They linger as he rocks side to side within the hug. Just like he has always done when they were kids,it makes her snicker and melt into the arms and sturdy chest of her sibling.

And just like that,shes Back to her body and present time. Bone tired but with a smile on her face.

Tomorrow she would try again.

-♡-

It was a busy day,so Busy that Fury had come back exhausted and was just about ready to go to bed at 7 p.m. when she had finally been able to free herself of all the duties she had undertaken.

She all but collapses on the bed,sluggishly taking off her armor and being able to comfortably fit underneath the covers.

Her whole body feels as heavy as concrete,her muscles Burning and her eyes slowly begining to close on their own. She managed to snatch the Nephilim's Respite amulet before she fell in a hypnagogic state.

This moment was the only thing that had kept her going through today. Her hands move on her own as she noiselessly taps on the totem with the pads of her fingers,the world around her begins to fall alway and she unconciously plunges into the Abyss.

Once again she finds herself within the void,just like she did yesterday. At least now she knows how all of this works...kind of. Kind. Of.

Shes decided that shes reaching out to War tonight,was he still chained at the council's feet? Was he alright?. She knew the worry would eat her whole,and perhaps complicate this already convoluted work of magic. Had it not been for Strife yesterday,who would know what would happen to her.

A steady breath left this representation of her,devoid of armor and weaponry with only the amulet to serve as some sort of conduit and anchor.

Like she did last time,she began to walk whilst trying to remember any of her interactions with War. She expected a memory to manifest in this realm at some point, she had a few hours to spare anyway.

Worry doesnt get a grip on her,not even a few minutes into her walk. But she does grow tired as nothing has given her a signal on where to proceed.

That is,until she begins to hear childish but loud and fast approaching steps. She turns to find herself at the bank of a muddy stream,watching Strife and Death sparr on the land across the body of water.

She feels herself caked in mud and sees a simple wooden staff thrown hastily by her side. Pieces begin to click as she recognizes this memory.

By now she must be around her mid teens,she can feel her hair shorter than how she has it now. Her hands are barely scarred and her body does feel tired but theres still that youthfull unrest within her.

--Sister! Sister!--The voice of the young nephilim that was her brother makes her look behind her again.

There he stands, a hatchling nephilim of very undeveloped features. In human ages she guessed he must be around 10. After so much time, nephilim tended to lose count on how old they were.

--Hm,Yes Child?--Shes curious as to what the kid had behind his back. She tries to sneak a look but War is quick to shift his stance and prevent her from doing so.

Messy platinum hair strewn about his soft features with a rectangle shaped- Very underdeveloped fitting for the lack of years on his life span. His white eyes look up at her with something akin to expectancy.

--I...have a gift-- He said meekly.

--Ah,so is that what you have behind your back?

He nodded,his secret found out. He clears his throat and presents his sister with an unpolished gem of black,magenta and dark pinks swirling within it. Its rough in texture but she can tell theres a feline eye line in the dead center.

--The other kids were playing around in the caves-- he began, quickly adding-- And I.. I know im not supposed to play there, I know Death said its dangerous but I stayed only at the edge!--Theres an urgency to his voice,like he is telling the truth and is desperate for her to believe him--But then I saw this!--He inches the gem closer to her-- And...I knew I had to get it for you before the others saw! There were scary bats and rats but I braved through.

Fury chuckled endeared, her eyes softening and taking the gem-- we might be able to make a warrior out of you,little one. Bats and Rats are scary, and ridden with disease.

War shudered at the idea of falling ill-- Do you like it?

She inspected the dirty gem and sat on the edge of the bank,her brother following suit with an urgency to gain his sisters favor and approval.

--Well it is quite dirty,I cannot tell-- She was just messing with the kid,but she does clean off the rough stone when her words follow silence.

Now in all its Glory, the gift can be appreciated. She smiles and turns to the young nephilim-- Its beautiful, thank you.

War squeaks and hugs his sister who relents and melts into the gesture. Her face buried in his fine,platinum hair.

Her gaze drifts to the reflection in the stream,surprised to see the grown yet youthful face of war. She blinks with stupor and pulls back, she feels his brother grow exponentially and now she has to look up to meet his snowy gaze.

--What sorcery...--He began,but then fury just gave him a shrug.

--Did you also ignore Death's teachings?

The hulking red rider looked away like an embarassed child-- The works of magic are lost on me...

--Like humor?

--Are you sure youre not strife?--He bit Back with good nature. And was that a smirk on his face?--What are you...we doing here?--He turns to see the silhouettes of strife and death locked in a dance of well timed blows and parries. But theyre blurry figures of black against the evergreen forest around them.

--do you recognize this memory? -- She asked,feeling the heat of the sun on her skin even if this was all fake. She gets a nodd to her question,however-- I just...I...-- the words get stuck in her throat. She doesnt feel right talking to him after her mistreatment of him at the chamber of the Council.

War could recognize the tone and expression. She was his sister,of course he knew. And that smirk grows into a grin --could it be...you were worried about me?

Fury almost chokes on her own spit,not used to being read so easily. She coughs out a few crude choice of Words,and her sibling all but breaks into a fit of giggles.

--you flatter me,fury--he began,trying to play nice-- Youve changed...--His voice sounds warm,genuienly happy for her. Like a Real brother.

--Earth and humanity have taught me much-- the answer is short and simple,believing she has shown too Many of her softer parts-- ...are you alright?

He sighed,the inquiry clearly has a more convoluted reply to It. He doesnt know how she Will take it, and Kinder words do not find him-- I believe they mean to...send me to the Abyss.

Fury jumps from her spot beside him,she looks at her brother with wide eyes-- what?! No,no,no War... Ill go to find you i-

The youngest nephilim takes his sister's hand. His palm massive even if both belong to the same species-- Sister,I Will handle it.

--War this is the goddamn abyss!--she yelled,temperance thrown to the wind.-- Ill go find you--She insisted as her feet shifted to help her stand up.

--You must have other duties-- he insisted, his gauntlet hand- so massive and incredibly gentle- cups the back of her head-- You three have always disregarded me for being the youngest. But i implore you to listen to me,to trust me. I Will handle it.

She couldnt live with the idea of losing yet another life time companion. The grief would eat her whole.

Fury brought her brother for a hug,the instinct of an older sister knowing she cant protect her kin-Such a raw kind of pain and Despair- was tearing her appart. She almost cries if it wasnt for the way her brother cooed to calm her as he returned the embrace with careful mindfulness of his strength.

--Sister I do not know where this worry comes from,but...it is appreciated-- his tone is still urgent-- But after I return and I make those who wronged us pay,I Will find you.

War,always so sweet with his siblings. In the end thats all he ever wanted,to be loved by his kin.

--Be safe...-- she urged, still not able to restrain this Burning urgency that claws at her throat and chest. -- By creator,be safe.

His hug tightened and he nodded.--Is it too late to ask for forgiveness for almost decapitating you? -- thats his try at humor,and she plays along like she has always done with him.

--Never--She shook her head-- but that is behind us now....brother.-- she felt him smile against her shoulder,she couldnt see it but being able to sense it made it all the better.

--Im your brother now?--Smug little blight.

--...youve always have been. I was just too blind to see it-- her grip tightens and she can all but feel his stunned expression,yet he soon melts like a child in the embrace of family.

And before she knows it, shes back to her humble abode of dark wood and thatched roof. She rolled on her back,her hands still on the amulet.

--Miss fury?--Came the voice of one of the humans from the other side of the door of her home-- Its past sundown,are you alright?

--Just fine,Gabrielle. --Her voice is groggy and a little strained as she swallows the knot in her throat-- I Will be out in a moment.

--Alright,Please come by in the morning. Angie insists on having you over for breakfast.

Fury snickered-- tell the little runt ill be there. And I might just find her something interesting tonight. -- Angie reminded her of War so much,not only in appereance but her trouble seeking nature and that inherit sweetness to her. The little human might just get along with her brother.

--Very well-- the smile on Gabrielles face is audible,and the rider then proceeds to get ready. Her ears trained on the steps of the mortal growing quieter.

There was only one more sibling to check up on.

And already,she began to dread the encounter.

-♡-

Fury tried to stall the encounter for a few good days,the guilt and shame too much for her. After everything, after almost stealing his place...

How could she be so disrespectful?

The image of Lust's illusion makes her stomach churn, makes her sick. She knows now that she does not want her siblings to kneel...

Simply...she wanted to be respected,perhaps just wanted to be acknowledged. Just like War. And just as simply,she dreaded to meet her eldest brother's eyes and see reflected in them her hubris.

Death had Many faults,but he was a leader all in all. And now shes wise enough to admit that she needs guidance, because being humanity's protector was hard.

Humans...they were riddled with worries and the uncertainties of what was to come for their entire species. She knew the raw fear of survival,a part of that was why she accepted to become a horseman...aside from her loyalty to her family.

She knew that she could not handle such crisis,she felt like an arrow threaded by her own unsteady pulse. And with no-one else to turn to,shes forced to confront her fear not only for her but for humanity too.

After a bit of walking she found a spot with a bit of decayed vegetation. How bugs and maggots Fed from the dead Bark, an endless cycle of death and rebirth.

Fury sighed,sitting with her knees to her chest. She remembers when she was younger,they came across a dead carcass of a hunt Now spoiled.

She remembers being squeamish at the sight,but Death Gently nudged her forward and reached for the animal's skull.

--Its just part of life,Fury-- he commented with a voice soft,patient, almost coldly indifferent at the passing of the animal-- Hunt and hunter,life And death. Its a sacred balance, it died and we...

He uses his sword to sever the head of the animal,and kneels as he carefully begins to clean off the decayed fur. Theres a practiced ease to his movements,he cleans it off as best as he can and when hes done he presents the skull to his sister.

--Icky...-- She commented,kneeling to see the bovine skull with a mix of disgust and awe.

--Perhaps. Death Is a sight to behold-- the older nephilim Noted,understanding of the disgust but also amused-- But be keen,look-- as he talks,he points at the maggots and then Gently shooshes his sister as a flock of vultures feed on the carcass-- Its important to this world. Decay,rebirth,theyre woven together. And it can be...beautiful.

Fury tilted her head,eyes falling to the corpse. --I dont understand.

-- think of this...-- he began,scooping a Mass of worms. His sister recoils with a snarl-- They feed the vultures alongside this cow. We eat this Cow, just like it Ate of the Grass. Its Decay feeds the earth and the cycle begins anew. Just because you dont understand it, it doesnt mean its not important.

He lets go of the Mass of maggots who burrow underneath. He cleans his hands and grabs the skull,to then help his sister up.

--So..the Earth feeds itself, thats it?--The eldest nodded-- I dont see the Beauty in it.

Death snorted-- Beauty comes in Many ways,Child. Like this skull, I believe War Will like it.

--I dont like it

--And just because you do not,it doesnt mean War wont like it either. Perhaps youll find Beauty in this cycle from a different lense-- He offered his hand-- Come now.

And young fury took it as shes guided deeper into the forest for foraging. Trusting of her brother's words.

In time she did find Beauty in death,mainly for the association to her eldest brother. Seeing Decay and blight always made her feel that her brother was close, that she wasnt alone. that her once guiding light, was always showing her the way even if he wasnt physically there.

She centers in that, and that memory just now. She can already feel the crunching of leaves and her steps across the field. Its only noise and touch,still dark as only the void could be.

The more she walks,the more she expected to turn and see her brother holding a bovine skull tucked between his arm and ribs,but nothing ever did appear.

It wasnt time to freak out, why would she? It took her a long time to find strife perhaps death is much the same. He was the oldest after all and perhaps magic wouldnt behave the way it was supposed to- she knew Many things could mess with such powers.

But a solid hour went by and nothing appeared,and to worsen the fear she began to feel the Grass give way to hard cobblestone and everything she could hear was only whistling wind that choired like souls in sheer lament.

Death was...death, perhaps thats what caused the sudden change,surely she was growing closer to him by that logic- or so Fury told herself just so panic and frenzy didnt take hold of her.

--Playing hard to get?--She asked to the void,looking around into an emptyness so consuming, so endless that it swallowed her sight with no sense of depth-- You old bag of bones,do me the courtesy of meeting me half way.

Her voice carried no bite,her teasing smile unstably quivering and teethering the line between faux calmness and mania.

--Youre even hiding Dust from me,are you?--She kept going,trying to believe her own lie that she wasnt completely alone.-- Dust! Come here! I May just have seeds for you.

But not even the cawing of crows met her ears.

Its such a deafening silence,even her meek and fearful steps startle her every time she hears them,she didnt understand where the cobblestone path came from..an overlapping memory?

Whatever the answer it all ended un the same thing: Fury,terrible engine of rage and rider of the black horse,felt herself beaten by fear.

Was there a way to brute force this? That was her first instinct. Could she pull her brother by the ear and yank him down to meet her here in this realm?

Death more than anyone should be able to fully sense her reaching out.

--This isnt funny anymore,brother!-- She began,the nickname so foreign as she began to run towards what she believed to be forward. Her heels echo on a stone floor she cannot see and each frenzied step she takes terrifies her more and more.

Brother.

When was the last time shes genuinely called him that?

--Brother!-- she called out again,voice wavering-- Death where in Oblivion are you?!

She must have ran for hours,until her legs quiver and falls. Overcome by worry and grief she screams,ripping her throat and clawing at the black floor that has no depth and is nauseating to stare at.

Were those tears falling? Her face felt so warm,she felt so lost.

No guiding light.

No knight to come to her rescue.

Curled in a ball she sniffs loudly and cries,perhaps her tears pool on the ground or they dont. She can see anything, she can only hear her heaving sobs filled with mucus and gasping breath that grates her throat into fine sand.

Her brother would not be so cruel.

She knew him.

But she couldnt find him,not in this place.

--Where are you...?-- she asked,a voice barely audible. She has never felt so defenseless even with her armor on, just like a child lost in the forest.

And all the while the cobblestone floor texture taunted her,only then does she recognizes the choir,the whistling of the wind she had forgotten about in her fear.

She needed an anchor,something to calm her before she can try to pull away from this place. "Be keen" the rider told herself,as ever so slowly the whistling became singing and moaning of souls.

And then...blue light,it lights up her path. She looks up,made a mess of tangled hair and reddened face.

Large is the arch a few feet away her,she doesnt understand what is going on. She Begged for death to show,and only souls heeded her call.

One final glimmer of insight comes to her, souls answering the call of the reaper. She always found Death's description of his role as flamboyant theatrics,but by now she Will take whatever this place gives her.

Still,her walk is uneven and stumbling. Her breath burns her lungs with her throat scratched deeply by her despair,and yet one step and then another she approaches the arch.

Her trail marked by something that gives her some calm. Crow feathers,guiding her like a mournful path of breadcrumbs past whats behind the carved stone looming over her.

Blue light wraps around a circle platform,shes puzzled that the trail ends at the very end of whatever this was.

--Death...?--The name sparks a surge of pure energy that breathes overwhelming life into her and just as quickly takes it away, euphoric and disorienting. With it comes the flash of blue and she begins to see skull phantoms began to float in and out from the blue gossamer sheen.

She follows the path to the end,unsure of what else to do. She looks past the low wall and into the center of the light, she finds no answer and pulls back.

Theres a pulse in the air now that shes close to this source of power,she recognizes the slowness of it. Only one person she knows has a resting heart rate of 40.

Perhaps this is just a stupid prank, and she really doesnt like it.

In her disdain she pulls back,only to knock down something that clatters to the ground making a sound like bone on rock. It only puzzles the rider,and as she looks down at the object all breath is pulled from her.

That stupid,Freaky bone mask of her brother laid on the ground.

She picks it up with shaking hands and asks--Where...where are you.-- She asked,no answer given-- Where are you?!-- she screamed,her fear pulsing through the Bond across this realm. The place swells up at the sheer energy she displays-- Death! Come here right now!

Her voice like a fearful Bark,she Holds the mask to her chest fearing the worst. The whistling of souls still in her ears, coming and going in a cycle.

A cycle.

--Oh,no...-- fury's tone shakes with realization. Finally the place shes in makes sense.

This is a Well of Souls.

And by all indicators...her brother was dead.

What a horrible thing to understand. How could this happen doesnt matter now. Fury gives up her fight and collapses to the ground, slowly Losing her mind to her grief.

She expected to hit the ground roughly,but the impact never comes. She feels cold as strong arms hold her up,and though she cant see through her tears she hugs whatever is gripping her.

Theres no words,nothing to say other than-- Im sorry,im so sorry. Please dont be gone,please dont be gone.

--Im not gone,child-- the voice of death himself is devoid of any teasing bite or sardonic grit. He settles his sister on the floor and hugs her with a gentleness so unbecoming of him.

--...why didnt you answer-- she can barely talk from how hurt her throat is.

--Its hard to hear,among the dead.

--Why...why are you dead?! What happened...!

--To ressurect humanity...I had to make a sacrifice. -- he cooed,gently stroking her hair.

--Nothing Is worth more than your life...

The old reaper sighed,hugging his dear kin tight-- I hoped for humanity's rebirth to be the freedom of War.

She scoffed bitterly and began to tell him about what she spoke with War,what happened to humanity and how theres only few survivors now. Death seemed to...deinflate at the news,but not all was lost.

Afraid,meek and feeling too weak to fight her pride she says--I dont want to lose any more people I care about--And just like a child,she asks-- Will I see you again?

Death nodded-- Surely. Life is a cycle. And i do believe our work is not done.

Fury sighed and cuddled closer-- Im sorry,im so sorry for everything Ive done to you...

He could never hold a grudge towards his siblings. He shakes his head and closes his eyes,his face pressed on the side of her skull.

--nobody knows your fury more than me,there is no ill Will I could hold to you. Youre still my sister.

--But ive been awful to you

Even in his untimely demise,Death had to fight the fear of vulnerability--my love for you three is unconditional.

Life hasnt been easy,and neither of the four have made the best of desicions. But still they prevailed,and so did their Bond.

The pale rider pulls away to wipe the tears of his sister,humming under his breath a gentle lullaby to sooth her. She slowly evens out her breath and when calm returns, her brother pulls back her hair with his spindly fingers and says.

--Youve grown much,sister.--Was that pride in his voice and face?

Only now she realizes,thats his actual face. Its been so long since shes seen it.

--I...couldnt fight it.-- she admitted --But...I did try.

A warm chuckle left the eldest-- I'd be worried if you didnt. -- he rests on his knees and goes to pull back a strand of wine red hair that got into his sister's mouth-- Its not easy being a leader. But surely youll find your way.

She snorted-- Since when are you so...soft?

The world makes him snarl-- Rid it of your mind. --He began,looking away at the ground-- looks like we have both grown. There Is much I must make up for.

Fury was in no mood to fight-- I dont know...anything. I dont know how to handle the human's fears and worries. I just...

--You dont understand? -- Its like hes recalling that same memory she did before all this. He sounds just a little smug,good to see not all of his nature got lost.

She sighed with disdain,knowing fully well what followed-- Suppose so.

Death pulls back his hands to rest them on his lap with his usual slouch akin to a shrimp-- worry is only natural,given their state. There is no rule book for leadership,I would just advice to follow your instinct. I believe youre finally of sound judgement

--Is that supposed to be a compliment?--Fury chided.

He smirked--You ask too much of me,sister.

The she horseman pulled her brother for a hug and decided to enjoy the company before the spell ended. He seem to catch on and hug back with no fight or complaint- He missed being a brother,so here he is.

--We'll bring you back-- She promised under her breath.

--We'll see eachother again-- His voice is so certain, it calms her and gives her a fixed point as she begins to lose the sensation of his touch and the world around her.

She now sees the sunset embracing this realm, she holds nothing but air but the smell of dead leaves and humidity cling to her. A final gift.

--At least you finally get some rest-- she commented towards the decayed tree,noting that within the trunk lays a single bird skull with feathers still clinging to it.

Fury grabs it and carefully cleans it on her way back to the human village. Her eyes are puffy from crying but she breathes in and out,she has had enough for today.

Eventually she reaches the human settlement and greets the mortals who dont comment on her tired appereance. Yet she does make a stop to hand the skull to little Angie,who acts a bit disgusted but intrigued.

--Why give me this?-- Asked the child.

--My brother taught me something, little one-- she kneeled to eye level-- The world is very scary for all of Us now. But your kin Will rise again. Just like after winter comes spring. -- she felt so silly saying it but nevertheless she does-- Its a cycle. Right now you feel scared and unsure,but you Will find your place here. All of you Will

Angie's face was a clear sign that the cogs in her head were turning-- I.. think I get it. Uhm thanks miss fury-- the child smiled brightly,warm as the Fire of the rider's youngest sibling-- Uhm..stay for dinner?

Fury's eyes met the gaze of Gabrielle who nodded reassuringly. She then returns to the girl and picks her up-- Very well. -- as they walk she begins to humm a tune,a single lullaby for herself.

The child she holds perks up-- You know it too?--The rider looked at her puzzled-- Jones sung it to me once,made me Real sleepy.

Priceless was the face the she-horseman made,taking just a split second to guess the circumstances that brought this kid to know such an old tune. She chuckles and shakes her head dismissively--Funny. My brother sung it to me,too.

Angie smiled-- Is he as sweet as Jones is?

Fury tapped on the amulet absentmindedly and looked past the window of the kitchen where a family was playing. She knew their story,an eldest brother in charge of taking care of his siblings with no guide other than his heart and witt. Much like Death when he was given the role of care taker.

With a chuckle she answered-- Even sweeter. He can be a bit of a handful sometimes-- she rolled her eyes as she recalled Death's and Strife's dramatic appereances-- Both of them actually, Sooo dramatic.

The child snickered--Jones told me I remind him of his youngest brother...William was his name?

Fury has to hold back a snort. 'William? Really?" She thought-- Hm,you remind me of my youngest brother too. In looks and demeanor. You little trouble maker-- she sets down the kid and ruffles her hair who giggles at the interaction And tries to stop the nephilim from messing with her fine locks.

The black rider knew her journey was far from done,and eventually she Will reunite with her siblings. But until then, she is not as alone as she thinks she is.

She has a family waiting for her here,and beyond all these realms. After all they were just a heartbeat away.

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