#i should be packing for my trip

[acaesic]

happy birthday dallon!

[elucubrare]

some of us didn't bring our servant on a quest to save the world, dude

[blizzardfluffykpop]

alright~ a few updates about everything! so this weekend I'll be seeing changkyun in chicago- so I prolly won't be posting until after I'm alive again from that 😂😅 (I am vv excited about it- I just know I'll be vv tired when I return home). Anyways, I have a few fics in the works~ one of them that is a request 🤭 I'm vv excited to work on them! But I think I'm going to change my masterlist a bit when I come back. I'm going to retire a few groups from the main masterlist and I've been debating for the past year about it... But I think I'm going to add a yearly masterlist- So it would go from most recent to the beginning of this year~

I'm also thinking about changing my pfp- I haven't been really into stray kids for uh... years- But I will be sure to make an update about that if I go thru with that too- (It may be ji changmin next 🫣🤭)

Anyways those are my few updates 🥰💖

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Adorned by stars | Changing States

When he hits the I-70, Jeremiah slots George Michael’s Faith into his ’98 Accord and drives with the windows down. His mother would chide him for two reasons: a) he’s wasting fuel and b) it’s begun to storm. But he likes the way the wind shears through his hair like a nail breaking drywall and he likes the way spats of rain settle on his skin like constellations because on the road, he isn’t just a hand for someone else to hold, a body to handle, a man who looks at another man and fears how much of himself he’s lost in his reflection. No. On the road he is the sky, adorned by stars of his own making, relentless in his abundance, blinking in the absence of any other light.

A little Changing States aesthetic & excerpt!

i'm so normal about him i'm so normal i'm so normal i'm so-

[acheronist]

i miss my tarot deck

[spacejammie-eimmajecaps]

Fell back asleep for a while (still have a horrible headache btw) and I had the most disturbing dream that I'm going to tell you guys about in the tags

[wildwood-faun]

Going away on Sunday and I was planning to pack most of my things tonight because many things are happening tomorrow and Saturday. It is now almost bedtime. I have packed one (1) thing.

[conceptofjoy]

gonna be away from my drawing tablet for like 5 days so no drawings o7

[cjgladback]

[ID: A photo of prepared wool fiber and wool yarn on a wooden tabletop. A multicolored spindle rests in an orange mug; orange and grey wool is in the process of being spun onto it, with a small amount wound onto the spindle's shaft as a fine single and the majority still wrapped loosely around the top as something like roving. Around the base of the mug lies a trail of more roving, wrapped into nests and threaded onto some yarn, all grey but with a gradient of colors mixed in. In order: lighter orange, pale peach, rose pink, purplish pink, light purple, and medium purple. On the table next to the garland is a small skein of sock yarn spun from the same gradient, somewhat overplied and tied with a length of bright mint green yarn. End ID]

One down, most of one to go! I executed my plot: carded up bonus thrift store lanolin wool, reclaimed the gradient fiber from my first support-spindle-spun skein and carded it into seven gradient steps, blended those two fibers together, and divided the whole progression into two equal sequences for socks or mitts or...something. I've heard of spinners working hard to avoid muddying up their fiber colors, meanwhile I'm over here splashing in the mud puddles! The above photo was taken in the overcast afternoon light from our kitchen windows, so it's even more grey, but as a reminder this is what the colorful half of this looked like in its previous form:

[ID: The same spindle in the same orange mug, this time on weathered wood in direct sunlight with a very chunky skein of safety-vest-orange yarn fading to pale orange and pink with white patches and finally a bright purple. End ID]

I'll be honest I did have some second thoughts about blending once I'd re-carded the yarn into a smoother gradient. But I know I don't use small amounts of yarn well, especially in bright colors, and the fiber did feel a bit frazzled by the time it had no strings remaining. It benefited a lot from combining with the too-much-lanolin of its grey friend. So on to join my trusty cone of dark grey wool in some more staid applications! I am really happy with the tweedy look of this first skein, not removing any neps that had spinnable fuzz still attached (and tbh probably leaving a few slubs that could've been teased out in drafting if I hadn't spun a section of this on the bus to and from IMTS in the pitch dark of pre-dawn and late night). Only concern now is that I did just pull out the cone and realize it's only about 22wpi and my first skein is closer to 30wpi. Maybe it'll fluff up in washing? But either way I think I'll be likely to sacrifice symmetry in favor of fewer frustrations with snapping yarn while chain plying and let my second single trend a little heavier than "as thin as possible." I think the lanolin has helped a bit with it sticking together longer but it's not magic.

[arctic-hands]

I have joined the society of bluetooth earphones

[vaguely-concerned]

the absolute insane research rabbit hole I am currently going down to try to determine the one (1) specific version of the robin hood stories I listened to on cassette tape audiobook in like 2001 and that permanently affected my brain chemistry. I am going nuts. and yet I must know. if anyone by chance should happen to know what version it could have been, considering that it was likely produced in the 90s or a bit before (from memory of the state of the cassette packaging, it was quite worn) and available (in norwegian but in translation) from a small library in somewhat rural norway... please tell me and free me from this self-inflicted torment lol

some more vaguely remembered context that might help pinpoint it:

robin dies at the end, and I think he's already been parted from marian for some time before that (I don't remember if it's because she's dead or just For Reasons, but the growing melancholy of the last few chapters even before he dies were probably what made this version imprint itself on my brain). he's at a convent after falling sick and the abbess or something is an old enemy of his (and maybe his cousin??) and goes whole hog on the bleeding cure to make sure he doesn't get up again. little john (and maybe will scarlet?? some merry man at least) are there with him as he dies and little john cries while robin comforts him. this scene did permanent things to my psyche I suspect. peak 'THIS WASN'T IN THE DISNEY FILM WITH THE FUNNY ANIMALS!!'-betrayal and outrage mixed with 'but also this is so sad it's somehow beautiful...' formative childhood experience.

if I remember correctly there's a bit more of the rest of the merry men than you get in most adaptations. robin and little john had some powerful homoerotic Somethings going on to my baby queer mind but that's just what the robin hood mythos is so idk what that adds to it in terms of helping with the search

I think it must have stuck fairly close to the original ballads that we have, at least comparatively (I've had a looksie and it was definitely not howard pyle's version. I think it had a bit more somber/serious tone especially towards the end, and less of the faux-old fashioned language)

I remember finding it very funny that robin's way of making friends was just finding people who proved they could easily beat him up or were better at stuff than he was and going 'you rule do you wanna join my cool club? :D' and them all being like 'you're an annoying little twerp but also ...yeah <3'. he may also have met marian like that in this or I may be mixing it up with a different version.

from this and some other odds and ends through my downward spiral of obsession I have a tentative theory it may have been either rosemary suthcliff or antonia fraser's versions (both from the 1950s)? but especially with the layer of translation getting inbetween it's so hard to tell haha

I understand if all anyone has to offer when faced with this always sunny conspiracy board of leads is sympathy and/or rightful mockery, but all ideas are welcomed with open arms

[ef-1]

when your just a girl but you have it all under control

[shatterthefragments]

(currently overwhelmed bc of having to entertain mum while i needed to get ready for bed so I’m just. Hopefully going to fall asleep. And thinking of all that I have to do this weekend. And hoping to hell I don’t get sick from my family. I know for sure dad won’t be wearing a mask while he drives (three others are joining in his car) and he’s a pall bearer too so he has other duties indoors and it is SO BAD right now and I can’t afford to get sick again. I’ll probably have no short term disability left to take if I do. If I don’t even have the energy I won’t be able to go to my shows even if I can somehow afford them. I won’t be able to see my friend there. I won’t be able to get more tattoos (for Completeness I need at least one more to make a dozen this year)

And fuck. I’m even like. A bit worried about trying to get donuts so I can give my sister a birthday donut or few (bc she likes them, we weren’t able to do any donut days this summer, and they’re reasonably affordable)

…also I might have to drive when 爸爸 is off on his pall bearer duties. In the Bad City. With several people that will talk. And that I almost definitely can’t loop. Say. Ashnikko’s Worms ad nauseam (for them) like I did last time I drove that city. The aunt who could drive is recovering and probably shouldn’t tbh. The other aunt doesn’t navigate there. And as long as all my passengers shut up ish (a few don’t speak English which is fine except I need to be able to drive so I need the cars occupants on my terms in stressful environments especially) and get real cool real quick about me taking the long way (I miss exits and turns and shit) I mean. It’s possible. It’s ridiculously stressful (even just thinking about it) and. I’m trying to reduce stress wherever possible bc FUCK I don’t ever want to have Those stress dreams where I’m dying because of it again. I want to want to live. I want to live.

[zaacataac]

I wish there was an app that would tell you what you’re gender’s gonna be tomorrow like the weather app

[scarletcomet]

I feel so stressed ahhhh

[quatregats]

Honestly the worst part of all of this is that I'm going straight to India tomorrow night, which is a lose-lose situation because (1) I know that I'm not going to have any time to rest if I'm going from being sleep-deprived from finals and being sleep-deprived from traveling with a 10 1/2 hour time difference and also basically being in transit for like 5 days straight, making me really not feel motivated to put in the extra push and get these essays over with, and (2) I really wanted this India visit to be a good trip, like I want to take pictures of my family house and brush up on Malayalam and just in general go in with intentionality and get the most out of it, because it's the first time I'm going back in >10 years and also it might well be the last time I get to go to Kerala (at least in a family capacity), but everything is shaking up for this to be a fever dream in which I am mostly just miserable and sleep deprived and if I'm lucky I'll come out of it remembering anything at all. Like I don't even have the post-finals hit of relief that you're done, and even worse, I don't even get a good trip to India. Plus on top of that I'm missing Christmas at home entirely, which is really not helping.