#i spent so much of winter napping and laying down that i got below the weight cutoff for my blood donations

[ntrlily]

i should go out and exercise but i am having so much fun playing my little video games

[kalpasio]

How Long Does It Take To Date A Werewolf?

2 Seconds to Fall in Love With a Werewolf

A Werewolf!Kalpas x Hunter!Reader fic, chapter 8, the final chapter below!

For the next few weeks, you traveled form inn to inn, camping between towns. Full moons were…fun. While you certainly wouldn’t want to stay around him, Kalpas never seemed to lose all control and attack people at random. He claimed it had something to do with a “discipline” he had received—some sort of spell that even Madikis couldn’t counter—and he cursed its caster on a regular basis. Most nights, so long as you gave him enough space, he wouldn’t even come near your group.

At the beginning, the three of you would rotate keeping guard, just in case he decided to visit, but eventually that practice stopped. The night of the full moon, you’d make camp early, Kalpas would wonder off, and you would all go to sleep. The next morning, he’d come back looking exhausted and sleep through most of the day. After his nap, however, he seemed completely fine, and the next day you were all back on the road.

Apart from the occasional odd job, there wasn’t really a way for you to make money, so you were running off of what Kailah had saved up to pay for the inns. You and Madikis had been taken straight from Fire Moth, so you had no money on you, and do you really think Kalpas carries around coins? This lack of gold meant you saved where you could, camping most nights and only getting two rooms when you stayed somewhere. Kailah and Madikis obviously shared a bed, leaving you and Kalpas to room together.

Some nights he would curl up as a wolf in front of the fireplace, some he would lay completely on top of you like some sort of wolf-blanket. Other nights, he would share the bed with you as a human, and no matter how much you tried not to move in your sleep, you would always wake with his arms so tight around you, it was hard to breathe. Where and how the man slept was entirely random, and your input on his decision was almost always ignored.

Kailah would tease you when she heard you shared a bed, but that was better than the complaining she did when you camped. Winter was fading, but even in spring, nights could be frigid. The fire you slept around did very little to keep the chill away, so those first few nights, you would scoot closer to Kalpas while the other two slept. Regardless of from, when you got close enough, he’d open an eye to glare at you, but a few seconds later he would turn his head the other way, as though pretending he didn’t know you were there.

The first morning this happened, you were woken by Kailah calling you a traitor and shouting so loud you worried someone would find you. Kalpas was visibly angry at the rude awakening, and Madikis was desperately trying to get his girlfriend to not poke the sleeping bear—or wolf, in this case.

“I was cold,” you tried to calm her down, but it just made things worse.

“So was I!”

“Nothing’s stopping you from sleeping next to Kalpas too,” you shrugged. Madikis wrinkled his nose up at your suggestion, and Kalpas threatened to bite her arm off if she tried.

“You could ask the ‘love of your life’ for a warming charm,” your offer was met with more complaints, so you gave up. The next night, you shuffled over again, and eventually you just went to sleep next to Kalpas straight away when night came. With warmer nights on the way, however, you were faced with a problem. What had once been a pleasant heat was now a fire next to you on an already hot night, and that made it impossible to sleep.

Rolling away from Kalpas just woke him up, and he’d move to press against your side again. Staying where you were meant sweating through the whole night and waking to find a horrible amount of fur stuck to your hot skin. You tried moving away multiple times, but eventually just found yourself very far from the campsite, and still hot. Kailah had laughed at you the next morning, but only after she spent five minutes panicking and searching for you both.

Explaining to Kalpas that you were too hot to sleep curled up to him went about as well as you might expect. Which is to say, he completely ignored you. When summer properly rolled in, you made an ultimatum. Either he stayed the hell away from you, or you started chaining him to a tree at night. You both knew the tree wouldn’t really stop him, but he got the message. That didn’t stop him from getting as close as he could without you complaining about the heat.

By fall, the four of you had found a small village that eagerly invited you in. It was the town that Kalpas had attacked the first time he escaped. Fire Moth had never sent them the help they needed, and with the lack of help with their rebuilding or fending off Honkai attacks, everyone in town cursed the organization.

Even though Kalpas had been the cause of their pain, that same old man invited you in again and listened when you explained how much Kalpas had changed over the past year. In the end, the four of you agreed to help defend the town from any Honkai attacks, and in return, you were welcomed with open arms. This did mean you had to build your own houses, which took some time, but Kalpas’ supernatural amount of strength certainly helped speed up the process.

Madikis and Kailah’s house was built first. The two would still gush over each other at any given chance, and if you heard “oh that would be great for when we have kids!” one more time, you were going to burn the house down before it was finished. Your house was started right after theirs was completed. No one had outright said it, but you all assumed Kalpas would be living with you.

The two of you had gotten close, you could easily say you had fallen for him at this point. Having only traveled with the same three people for so long, you worried that you only liked him because you had no other options. Looking back however, it was clear you had liked him before you started traveling together, and you wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.

Telling him how you felt wasn’t overly scary—really you doubted he would care—but you didn’t see a point, especially if he did care. If he got upset and left, you’d be stuck here, and you weren’t sure your heart would ever recover.

Madikis had been your confidant in the matter, mostly because there was no way Kailah didn’t let something slip, and you didn’t know anyone else in the town. Tea at his place while Kailah was out became a weekly occurrence, and you weren’t at all surprised to see the two had a full herb garden in their backyard before your house was finished. Every week, your friend would tell you to just talk to Kalpas, and every week, you came up with some excuse.

“Well, he’s busy building the house right now,” you would say.

“The man’s literally building a house for you, just tell him!” Madikis would argue.

“Oh, the full moon is coming up, I don’t want to make him more stressed,” you fought while adding sugar to your tea.

“When has he ever been stressed about the full moon?” Madikis would slide the sugar away from you.

“It’s not that big a deal,” you complained while clipping some rosemary.

“If it weren’t a big deal, you would just tell him,” Madikis reasoned while watering his invisible dusk-blooming choke vines.

You were running out of arguments, and by the time your house was finished, you were seriously considering giving in, but the decision was made for you.

“Thanks for all your help with the house,” you smiled at Kalpas, who you had just met outside your new home after hearing it had been finished.

“Help? It’s my house,” Kalpas glared down at you, though at this point you were used to it.

“Oh.” Did you just not have a house? “Well in that case…would you mind helping with mine?” the disappointment was clear in your voice, despite how hard you tried to hide it.

“What are you talking about? You’re living here too,” he walked over and picked up the pack that had all your belongings. “Those two idiots are living together, why wouldn’t we?” He was talking about Kailah and Madikis, and while you certainly didn’t consider them idiots—especially given that they were the smartest people you knew—correcting Kalpas on the matter had yet to work.

“Yeah, but they’re dating,” you held your hand out to take your bag, but Kalpas just ignored you and walked inside carrying both your bag and his own.

“And?” he asked while heading towards the stairs.

“And…we’re not?” He stopped and you walked straight into his back.

“Since when?” His voice held a dangerous undertone, and you were confused by the whole situation.

“Wait, when do you think we started dating?” You counted fifteen seconds before Kalpas moved.

“Shut up.”

“I mean I’m fine with us dating, I just know!” you had to walk fast to catch up with his long strides.

“Then quit complaining!” you couldn’t help but laugh at his outburst, but stopped in favor of a smile in when you saw his glare.

It took three hundred and forty-five days for you to start dating. That’s eight thousand two hundred and eighty hours, or twenty-nine million eight hundred and eight thousand seconds. But that’s not what you wrote in your journal that night. Instead, all you wrote was two seconds to fall in love with a werewolf.

As usual, thank you so much for reading this! It's another "wait we're dating" because that's just classic Kalpas (aka I think that's just how relationships work with this man, he attaches to you and you're stuck now, congrats) Also with the sleeping when your camping he really just said "I do not see it" and then opened his arms for cuddles totally not ooc, don't worry about it

also don't worry about the horrible ending, it's fine

if you have a request you want to send in, go ahead! I'm working through them (slowly because I keep going "yeah 5k words!" and then writing 15k) but the thousand fic train is on it's way!

[saintshigaraki]

THESE ARE HARD TIMES FOR DREAMERS

title from bones by ms mr

pairing: yandere nanami kento x f!reader

word count: 2.6k

excerpt: You wish you’d studied the stars more, ingrained them so deeply into your psyche that you’d carry the night sky with you, always. 

You wish they’d never been stolen from you in the first place.

a/n: nanami if ur reading this i’m free thursday night. 

tags: yandere, angst, reader is once again full of rage, nanami love what have you done, overuse of the word hate

warnings: yandere tendencies, obsessive and possessive behavior, slight infantilization, noncon/dubcon, gaslighting (?), kidnapping, slight stockholm syndrome, mention of past suicide attempt 

MDNI!

You can’t exactly pinpoint where it all went south. There’s not a specific date that stands out to you when you actively noticed things taking a turn for the worst. It’s like that fable. About the frog slowly being boiled alive. Except, in this case, the frog is you and the boiling water is Nanami. And in this case, this is not some story your mom used to read to you about the dangers of gradual escalation, it’s your life. If you can even call this monotonous hell you’re living a life. 

You’ve got to hand it to him, you really didn’t see it coming. Nanami’s always been smart like that. Even now, after everything, or maybe even especially now, after everything, you can’t deny that. 

You don’t bother moving from where you lay, sprawled out on the floor, when you hear the first click of many locks signaling that your sweet and doting lover has returned. 

You used to try to rush him, or get the jump on him with the heaviest thing you could find. Once you started to get really desperate, you just screamed over his shoulder before he had time to clamp a large hand over your mouth. 

None of it ever worked, of course. 

It was months ago that you decided hopeless escape attempts simply weren’t worth Nanami’s wrath. He’s faster than you, stronger than you, and far bigger. And he always will be. 

When your relationship with Nanami was still somewhat normal (though looking back you can’t help but notice all the things that weren’t normal, you suppose hindsight really can be quite the bitch in that regard) you never really thought too hard about how much stronger he was compared to you. In some ways, it might’ve even been comforting, instead of just horribly depressing. No one could touch you when your hand was tucked in his. 

It hurts more than you’d like to admit that something you once found such solace in, is now what stands between you and any semblance of normalcy and shred of happiness. 

(And fresh air. God, you miss fresh air so much it hurts, a dull never-ceasing ache deep in your chest. You miss the stars too. Sometimes, when you’re laying on the floor like you are now or in the dead of night when it’s all you can do to swallow down your screams, you try to map out constellations on the ceiling. You’re not very good at it though, and the few constellations you actually remember are starting to slip from your memory like water through fingers, no matter how desperately you try to hold onto them.

You wish you’d studied the stars more, ingrained them so deeply into your psyche that you’d carry the night sky with you, always. 

You wish they’d never been stolen from you in the first place.)

It takes Nanami’s slightly disapproving hum to snap you out of your celestial spiraling. 

You tilt your head back, just enough to find he’s towering over you. His mouth set in a grim line. His glasses, jacket, and tie have already been discarded, his shirt rolled up to his forearms. The sight of him like this use to make your cheeks burn. Now, it’s hard to rein in the urge to spit at his feet and hiss out every seething thought you have about him burning below the surface. 

But the lecture you’d receive after a ‘tantrum’ like that wouldn’t be worth it. He always manages to twist your words, your own feelings, sometimes even your very sense of self, until you can hardly tell what’s up and what’s down. Until you can hardly distinguish your reality from his. Until all you can hear is Nanami’s voice in your ear, reminding you of everything you’ll never be. Of just how helpless you are. 

(It’s like his hands are around your throat, choking and choking and choking.)

And once you’re nothing but a sobbing heap on the floor, he’ll pull you into his lap, tuck your face against the curve of his shoulder, and rub soothing circles into your back while saying something along the lines of ‘It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ll always be here take care of you’ until your sobs have quieted to the occasional hiccup.

You hate it, how he manages to make you feel so dependent on him. He’s so, so good at knowing just what string to pull so that you’ll unravel completely, just so he can put you back together again with his painstakingly gentle hands. 

Nanami’s smart like that. 

So, you’ve learned to bite your tongue. 

“You’re insistence on laying on the dirty floor when we have a perfectly good couch and bed truly astounds me,” he says, monotone. 

You don’t justify his sarcasm with a response, partly to stall what inevitably will come after this and partly to annoy him. Nanami doesn’t like it when you ignore him. It’s one of the few things you have the power to do that manages to get under his skin. 

It’s these little rebellions, you’ve found, that make all the difference. 

You eye the couch warily, it’s plush and huge. The perfect place for an afternoon nap. Nanami had traded out the smaller one he’d had before, for this one, a few months after you’d started dating. He’d wanted one big enough that you two could comfortably lay together as you slept and he read. You spent countless hours there, tucked into his side, with the setting sun warming your skin. 

It’s also where you had told him that you wanted to end things. That he’d gotten too overbearing, too controlling. That you felt suffocated. That you still loved him dearly, but that you couldn’t do this anymore. It’s where you left him as you walked out with only a single bag in hand. 

That night you went to sleep in some shady motel room and woke up back in Nanami’s bed with a padded handcuff chaining you to the frame. 

These memories from before have a way of coming back to haunt you, they pass through the walls, whispering poison in your ears, caressing your skin one moment just to dig their claws in deep the next. 

They mock you as you sit and rot and dream of stars you’ll never see again. 

“You’re stalling.” He always manages to sound so distinctly unimpressed with you whenever you don’t follow one of his unwritten rules (and God even if you were actively trying to follow them, there are so many that keeping track of them is nothing short of an impossible feat).

You finally get to your feet, wringing your hands in a way that you know makes you look weak and pathetic. Just the way Nanami likes you so that he can swoop in and take such good care of his little darling love. 

“Kento, I-” 

“Save it,” he says, already walking towards the bedroom. 

You could put up a fight, but all that’d do is make him angry, and then you’d have to do what he wanted anyway and deal with being tethered back to the bed for a few days while Nanami fusses over you like some sort of deranged mother hen.

You make your way over to the bedroom, already starting to strip, ready to get this over with as soon as possible. 

You’re half-naked by the time you enter his room. 

Even after months and months of this, the humiliation of standing nearly naked in front of him while he stays fully dressed never dulls, it’s still just as sharp and awful as the first time he made you do it. 

(It’s like you’re peeling back your own skin, defenseless as he rubs salt in the wound.) 

You suppose you should feel lucky that he lets you keep on your bra and underwear. Not that the undergarments he bought you really cover all that much, but in these four walls, beggars can’t exactly be choosers. 

He takes off his watch, setting it carefully onto his dresser before walking over to you and starting his nightly inspection for any cuts or bruises you may have received (or given yourself) throughout the day while he was off at work. Off in the world you’ll never see again. Just the thought is enough to make you want to scream. 

You used to be able to wiggle your way out of this, before the incident, as Nanami has dubbed it, but now it’d be a cold day in hell before he doesn’t painstakingly go over (almost) every inch of your skin with a careful eye and calloused hands. 

His thumb always brushes terribly gently over the scar a few centimeters to the right of one of your jugular veins, where you had attempted to slit your throat after you realized that you would probably never escape this place. Never escape him. 

You’d never seen Nanami as scared as when he walked in on you holding a knife to your throat. And you’d never seen him as angry as after he’d wrenched it from your hand using a type of speed that shouldn’t even be humanly possible. 

He took a full month off work after that which coincidently also happened to be the worst fucking month of your life. 

He cups your face in his large hand and presses a kiss to your temple. A sign that he’s deemed you just as pristine as when he left you and that he’s very pleased by it. 

You want to bite his hand. You want to rip his flesh from the bone. You want to hold his heart in your hand and crush it. 

(You want to go home. You want to feel the earth beneath your bare feet. You want to sit on a roof in your childhood neighborhood and watch the sun dip below the horizon and drown the world in golden light. You want to step out on an autumn day with winter just around the corner and smell the crispness in the air, feel it claw its way into your lungs. 

You want to remember what it’s like to be human.)

Nanami’s lips are on yours before you can think, soft and enticing. You could push him away or just say no. He’d listen. Not even he can apparently justifying forcing you. 

(We all have our limits, don’t we?)

But you don’t. You haven’t in a long while. And you hate yourself for it more than you could ever hate him.

He loses his shirt rather quickly and you manage to discard your bra before he lifts you up and tosses you on the bed. You don’t get a second to breathe before he’s over you, monstrous and awful and so terribly beautiful. 

He takes a moment to caress your face, his knuckles brushing over your cheek so tenderly that it nearly makes you sick. You’re thankful when he finally says, “Open up.” 

You do as he says and in the next second two of his fingers are stuffed into your waiting mouth. 

“Suck.” 

And you do, without hesitation, because you know what’s coming next. You know that for the next hour or so, there’ll be no denying the fact that you’re alive, that you’re not some ghost haunting these halls. It’ll prove that it’s blood that flows through your veins instead of stone, that you have not yet started to rot in your own skin. 

He he pulls his fingers from your mouth without a word and leaves a trail of burning kisses down your sternum and stomach. He wastes no time pulling your underwear off and attaching his calloused thumb to your clit, rubbing tight little circles in a way that has you keening almost immediately. 

In an embarrassingly short amount of time you’re wet enough for him to comfortably slip a finger in. Just one of them reaches spots you never quite manage to hit on your own, and you hate how much you love it. It has you moaning, nearly loud enough to drown out the lewd squelching by the time he adds a second finger. 

“You’re so, so good for me,” he murmurs, voice rough. It sends a shiver down your spine.

You hate that the praise has you clenching his fingers in a near vice grip. You hate that he still affects you in any way after what he’s done to you. After what he’s reduced you to. 

You don’t have time to stew in your self-loathing before his fingers find that spongy spot inside of you that has you seeing stars. 

(And this is the reason you don’t push him away. 

You’ll never step foot under the night sky again. But here, with his fingers hitting all the right spots in your cunt, you’ll make your own galaxy and pretend that it holds a candle to the real thing.)

With the pace he sets, his constant low grunts of just how lovely you are creaming around his fingers, and the way his thumb never lets up on your puffy clit, you’re coming within minutes, you spasm around his digits so hard that the stars you so love burst behind your tightly shut eyelids. 

He eases his fingers out of you and licks them clean, his dark eyes half-lidded and nearly glowing in the dimly lit bedroom, burning straight through you. 

You’re the one to look away first. You always are. Shame settling heavily in your gut. Shame that you enjoyed it, shame that you didn’t push him, shame that you’ll do this all over again tomorrow.  

When he finally sinks into you, he does it slowly. Sometimes you wish he wouldn’t, sometimes you wish he’d make it hurt. It’d be easier to hate him instead of yourself if he did. 

When Kento fucks you like this, chest to chest, there’s not a single part of you not swallowed whole by him. 

You hate it. 

You hate yourself more for moaning when he changes the angle and starts fucking you so hard and fast that your hands can’t help but scramble for anything to hang on to, they tear down his back, drawing blood which seems to only spur him on to go harder. 

“Kento I-- I’m-,” but you can’t finish the sentence, not when you can feel your orgasm teetering on the edge, so, so close that it’s painful, you just need- 

“You want to come?” He asks, his voice annoyingly steady.  

It’s unfair of him to expect you to be able to answer when he has you nearly folded in half. You can hardly even think. 

(But when has Kento ever really been fair?)

“Use your words, darling.” His lips are right against your ear, his tone unbearably condescending, and maybe a bit mocking. 

You hate him for asking you to beg. 

You hate yourself more for giving in. 

“Kento, please,” you whine. 

He laughs, low and mean, you feel it in your own chest and for a moment it really is as though you are nothing but an extension of him, a limb left useless without Nanami guiding you. You hate it. You hate it.

Eventually, he relents and brings his thumb back down to your clit, resuming those tight, firm circles, and that’s all you needed to finally push you over the edge.  

This time, when you come, there are no stars to comfort you. Just Kento’s eyes, bright and burning. 

Your cunt clamping down on his cock is all it takes for him to let out a low groan and still completely inside you, the warmth of his cum flooding your cunt is awful in it’s familiarity. 

His eyes finally close as he drops his forehead against yours, breathing your air and forcing you to breathe his. 

He closes the gap between your lips, gently, sweetly. You can almost pretend for a moment that this is the Kento you knew years ago. Who held you so sweetly and smiled when you smiled. 

You don’t realize you’re crying until he kisses your temple tenderly and wipes away your tears. He’s not worried, you cry more often than not after he fucks you. You don’t really want to think about why. 

You let your mind wander as he carries you bridal style to the bathroom, where in a minute he’ll run a warm bath for you two to share, then afterwards he’ll dry you off with the utmost tenderness, then dress you himself before carrying you to the kitchen where he’ll set you on the counter as he makes dinner (you won’t be allowed to help, of course) then he’ll force every last bite down your throat if you refuse to eat (he hasn’t had to do that in a long while though), then he’ll have you curl up on his lap, head tucked into his shoulder, as he reads. After about an hour he’ll bring you back to the bathroom where he’ll brush your teeth for you because you never do it right, and then he’ll drag you into bed no later than 10:30 PM so that you can do it all over again tomorrow. 

“Do you want the lavender or rose soap today?” Nanami asks you. 

You ignore him in favor of trying to remember the details of your galaxy, but it’s already faded away to nothing by the time you close your eyes. 

a/n pt 2: i feel like it was painfully obvious that this was my first attempt ever at smut. i’m so sorry yall. i really did try. 

[magpie-to-the-morning]

Sundress Season

Rating: Explicit (18+ ONLY)

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Fem!Reader

Wordcount: 3.5k

Tags: Fluff, Domestic af, Hurt/Comfort, Nothing major the Reader got some scratches gardening and Frankie is Concerned, p in v sex, wrap it before you tap it, Size Kink, Sort Of, Exhibitionism, If You Squint, A little, Dirty Talk, mostly just tooth-rotting fluff (plus a little loving smut),Triple Frontier, Frankie “Catfish” Morales, Domestic, Gardening, Outdoor Sex, No Beta

Summary: You and Frankie have just moved into a farmhouse fixer upper and are enjoying the first warm day of spring. A lazy afternoon nap turns into something... more.

Read on Ao3

Leaning the shovel against the white picket fence, you stand back to take an appraising look at your handiwork, squinting against the midday sun. You’ve taken advantage of one of the first truly warm days of spring to plant some blackberry bushes along the boundary of your new home. Sweat slides down your spine and you can already feel a dull ache spreading through your calves and along your forearms, but you toss aside your leather work gloves with a grin, proud of your morning’s work. You brush your hair away from your face with the back of an arm, leaving a trace of dirt along your forehead. “Frankie, come look.”

“One sec.” His answer is muffled, even considering it’s coming from inside the old farmhouse the two of you have just moved into, and you realize he must still be working on the kitchen sink.

You enter the house, surprisingly cool and dim after the sunny warmth outside, and walk to the kitchen. Frankie’s legs jut out from beneath the sink, and all you can see of him are his work boots, khaki pants, and a glimpse of his soft stomach where the rusty red t-shirt he’s wearing has ridden up. You lean against a nearby counter, the smooth stone lip pressing into your lower back, and smile down fondly at him. “How’s the sink coming?”

The house is a dream come true for both of you, but it’s also needed a ton of work both inside and out. You’ve already sanded floors, patched up creaking stairs, painted most of the rooms, and ripped out overgrown hedges that had threatened to take over the yard. Once you’d cleared them out, the yard and gardens became an invitingly open canvas, just waiting for you to make your own.

The two of you had spent several late winter evenings curled up in front of the stone hearth, seed catalogs and plant nursery order slips laid out in front of you, arguing pleasantly over how to cram in every plant both of you want. You’re determined to line the yard with fruit trees and shrubs, while Frankie is surprisingly invested in the beds where he plans to cultivate tomatoes, peppers, cucumbers, and a variety of herbs. At least you both agreed to leave the large, well-established lilac trees bookending the house, and you’re currently waiting to see who will win the bet about what color the sprawling, thorn-covered rose bushes will be. You’re hoping for a buttery yellow to complement the lilacs, while Frankie is holding out hope that they’ll be the same pale pink as the roses he’d brought you for one of your first dates.

This morning, just when the two of you had made plans to tackle some of the new plantings, the kitchen drain had backed up. You’d decided that job would be better handled by Frankie and headed out to start the landscaping yourself. “Almost there, I just need to…” Frankie’s deep in concentration, and you swear you can almost see him sticking the tip of his tongue out as he focuses. There’s a final sound of metal scraping against metal, followed by a victorious “ha! Try it now.”

“You sure? I don’t want to soak you.”

A muted huff echoes from the space below the sink. “What, you don’t trust me?”

“Ok,” you shrug. “Just don’t blame me if you get a faceful of water.” You turn the tap on slowly and watch as the water spirals easily down the drain. “Hey, you did it!”

Frankie braces a hand along the top of the cabinet and pulls himself to his feet. “Don’t sound so surprised,” he teases. “Told you I could do it.”

“My hero,” you say lightly, crossing the floor to kiss his smiling cheek. His scruff scrapes lightly against your face, and you find yourself lingering, especially when he captures your lips for a proper kiss. “Now I can wash some of this dirt off- I feel like I brought half the yard in.” After the hours you spent planting various shrubs and a few small fruit trees, your arms are streaked with dry soil.

“Here, let me help you.”

Frankie steps behind you, his broad form leaning against yours as you stand at the newly repaired sink. His thighs press lightly against your own as his arms encircle your waist. He leans his chin on your shoulder and his messy curls brush against your ear while he begins to run soap over your forearms. You laugh, his efforts mostly just splashing dirty water around, but the cool water is a welcome relief. “Frankie! I can do it myself.”

You can feel him smiling against your neck. “I know, I just- oh.” His voice turns suddenly soft, with a note of worry.

“What is it?”

“Baby, you hurt yourself.” He steps alongside you, examining the delicate skin of your inner arm with a concerned frown. “What happened?”

“What?” You look down and see a few thin, angry red lines streaking the length of your forearms. “Oh, it’s nothing. The blackberry branches were thorny, that’s all.” You’d been wearing one of Frankie’s flannels for a little extra protection, but it had grown too hot and you’d stripped down to just your t-shirt. “It’s fine, they’ll heal fast.”

Despite your reassurance, Frankie ducks into the bathroom while you pat your arms dry with a clean dish towel and comes back holding some ointment. “They’ll heal better with this.” He flips open the cap and looks up, seeking permission.

You nod, unwilling to deny him anything, especially with that melting brown gaze trained on you. It’s not necessary, but you have to admit- you love that he takes such good care of you. Frankie takes his time, gently stroking a dab of ointment over each small scratch. His light touch quickly takes the sting out of your small hurts, and when he’s finished you catch his hands, bring them up to your lips for a grateful kiss. You adore his hands- so much bigger than your own, strong and capable but still so deft. He ducks his head and smiles and your heart clenches with love for this quiet, loving man.

------- After changing out of your dirt-streaked jeans and into a clean sundress (which, of course, Frankie also offered to help with), you head back to the kitchen to grab a drink from the fridge. The cold glass bottle begins beading almost at once, and you hold it against your slightly sunburnt neck. “I was going to go read in the yard for a bit, care to join me?”

“I’ve got a couple more things to finish up here, you go ahead.” Frankie drops a kiss to your temple as you pass, on your way to get a book and an old quilt to spread out on.

“Ok, see you in a bit.” The old screen door swings shut behind you, bouncing slightly before it catches the latch. A project for another day, you think. The two of you have already done plenty, and for now you just want to enjoy the rest of the sunny afternoon.

You spread your quilt out under a flowering magnolia tree which offers just the right amount of shade and lay down on your back. A light breeze stirs the green grass around you and sets the flowering tree branches swaying, a few pale pink petals raining down. Sunlight dapples your face as you relax, enjoying the surroundings of the garden you and Frankie are making together. The book is good, but you find yourself distracted, listening to nearby birdsong and watching billowing clouds scud across the bright blue sky. With the sun warm on your face, it’s not long before your eyelids are drooping.

-------

When you wake up, shadows are lengthening across the yard and Frankie is sprawled out next to you, having come out and dozed off at some point after you did. You lean into his shoulder, still warm from the heat of the sun, and smile against him. There’s a patch of skin just below his hairline and above his collar, and you lean in to kiss him just there. He tastes faintly of clean sweat and you press your tongue against him, seeking the slight taste of salt.

Frankie stirs and sleepily cracks one eye open. “Can I help you?” Try as he might to sound long-suffering, you suspect he enjoys your touch.

“Nope, I’m good.” You toss your book aside and drape yourself over his back, enjoying the slight movement below you as he shifts to accommodate you. It’s getting a little cooler now as the sun slips towards the horizon, but Frankie’s warm, solid presence grounds you. He tenses a little when you lean your head on his shoulder and you pull back at once. “Is your shoulder still bugging you?” He’d pulled it while you were moving and as hard as you try, you don’t always manage to wrest the heavier chores away from him, so it’s been a slow recovery process.

His answer rumbles quietly from below you. “A little. Working on the sink probably didn’t do it any favors.” You lean up at once, straddling his waist so you can massage his neck and shoulders. “Poor thing, you are tight here.”

He hums in agreement, though you can feel the tension begin to leak out of him as you knead his tense muscles. You work a stubborn knot, fingers digging into the meat of his shoulder, and as he sighs you can feel him relax further.

You lean down once more, careful to put your weight on your hands, braced against the ground,  and drag your mouth lazily over his neck. Your seeking licks turning to more intent kisses and when your teeth close over his pulse point, Frankie lets out a low groan and bucks his hips. You feel the movement all through him, especially where you’re seated against his ass.

“You want me to stop?” You ask teasingly, getting the expected shake of his head in response. You grind slightly against him before returning to nose at his neck. By the time you trace the shell of his ear with your tongue and nip gently at the cartilage, Frankie has had enough.

He rolls the two of you over with a smooth motion that ends with you flat on your back, and him smiling above you. “Oh, are we done fooling around?” You look up playfully. “I can show you the blackberry bushes before-”

He stops your mouth with a kiss, nipping at your lower lip before licking his way into your mouth. Delight shivers through you and you deepen the kiss, your tongues tangling languidly. You run your hand through his tangled curls, scraping your nails against his scalp. This pulls a soft noise from low in Frankie’s throat as he leans into your touch. His nose brushes yours and he nudges your cheek, trails kisses down your jaw.

Heat is pooling low in your belly and you spread your legs to invite him closer. Frankie takes the hint, canting his hips to drag the growing bulge in his pants against your core while you push back into him. “We should head inside,” you gasp as he moves lower, sucking at the delicate skin of your neck.

“We can if you want, but who’s gonna see?” His large hands cup your breasts and he dips his head to brush kisses over their swells. You arch your back, desperate for his touch even as you look around cautiously. He has a point; there’s no neighbor on this side of the house, just a patch of woods, and you’re well back from the road.

“Good point.” You reach down to tug at the hem of his shirt. Grinning, he sits up for a moment to help you. As soon as he’s shirtless he gets straight back to the task at hand. Frankie’s fingers make quick work of the buttons running the length of your sundress and he pulls the fabric aside, exposing the creamy lace of your bra. Your stomach flips at the sweet, eager look on his face. You’ve been together so many times, but he always makes you feel special, cherished. Despite being outside, potentially exposed, you feel completely at ease in his arms.  

With a quick glance up to check that you’re ok with it, Frankie unclasps your bra and helps you shrug out of it. The air is slightly cooler now, but his warm, broad palms encompass your breasts before the chill can even register. You sigh as his thumb brushes your nipple, and downright shudder when he wraps his plush lips around the stiffening peak. Your legs are writhing almost of their own accord now as you grow desperate for more. “Frankie,” you groan, tugging at his hair.

You feel his lips curve into a smile and his tongue darts out to flick against you. It glides along your swollen bud and your pussy aches for more so you hitch your leg over his hip. Frankie grabs your thigh to hold you close and rolls his hips sinfully against you, drawing a desperate noise from deep in your throat. “You like that, baby?”

You nod frantically. “You know I do. You know it drives me crazy when you put your mouth on me.”

Frankie chuckles and sucks your nipple into his mouth, pulling much of your breast along with it. The tugging sensation sends a bolt of desire straight to your cunt and you whine. You seize his jaw and glare, your eyes blown with lust. “If you don’t touch me soon Francisco I swear I will go inside without you and finish the job myself.”

You’re all talk and Frankie knows it. “I am touching you, sweetheart,” he says innocently.

You give an irritated huff and seize his hand, directing him where you want it. His composure slips when his fingers brush the crotch of your panties, already soaked with your need. His gaze flicks to yours, a lovestruck look in his eyes as he asks softly, “is this all for me?”

Biting your lip you nod. “Yes. I need you Frankie, please .”

“Shh, I’ve got you baby.” Frankie hooks a finger in the waistband of your panties and drags them over your legs. You kick them off, nearly sobbing in relief as he drags a single finger through your glistening folds.

Frankie closes his eyes reverently. “Shit honey, you weren’t kidding.” His finger comes away coated in your juices and he sucks it slowly before replacing the digit. He adds another finger, the pads slipping just inside your entrance to collect more of your slick before circling your clit. You tip your head back, grasping his shoulders as he gently fingers your slit. Just when you can’t take it, when you’re ready to beg for more, he pushes those fingers into you, stretching you out perfectly. Mewling, you buck your hips, chasing the feeling of him fucking you open.

“Mm, that feels so good. Don’t stop.”

“Never. Think you can take another?”

“Yeah.” Your answer comes as a breathless whine.

“Good girl.” Frankie adds a third finger and you swear it makes you see stars. He curls his fingers to stroke that spot deep inside and you find yourself skating the edge of your release. You’re so close, could so easily tip right over that edge, but it’s not until you hear Frankie murmur “come for me, beautiful” that you actually do. All that gorgeous tension he’s been winding up unspools in a rush of pleasure, your legs shaking and your hips bucking as he works you through it.

You’ve scarcely begun to come down before Frankie’s blazing a trail of kisses down your belly, his hands gently parting your thighs wider to settle between them, keen concentration suffusing his handsome face.

“Wait,” you breathe, catching his jaw with a deft hand.

Frankie draws back at once, concern creasing a furrow between his brows as he gazes up from between your legs. “Everything ok?”

You sit up, already nodding to reassure him as you draw him forward and kiss him deeply. “Everything’s perfect. I just want to come on your cock this time.”

Frankie looks down at you in amazement before pulling you into a crushing embrace. He tilts your chin up to give you a searing kiss, his arm wrapped around your waist. He leans his forehead against yours, his breath tickling your lips as he rasps “You’re perfect, you know that, right?”

You giggle, moved by the awestruck look on his face, and drop your hands to unbuckle his pants. He’s already barefoot, making it easier to push his pants down, followed by his boxers. You glance around again, reassuring yourself that the coast is clear. Clocking what you’re doing, Frankie chuckles. “Don’t worry, baby, we’re good.”

Smiling a little sheepishly, you nod. “I know. Just protecting your honor.”

Frankie begins to laugh softly but the sound is cut off by a hiss as you lick your palm and wrap it around his shaft. “F-fuck.” His eyes roll back in his head as you tighten your grip, working his cock. You brush your thumb over his weeping slit, collecting the pearly bead of precum glistening at the tip. “Now who’s being a t-tease?”

You look up at him innocently through your lashes. “I don’t know what you mean, Frankie.”

“Sure you don’t,” he huffs, his breathing already picking up. “C’mere, baby.” He pulls at your waist, encouraging you up into his lap.

You’re happy to oblige. With a few quick movements, you’re settled above him, his cock lined up with your entrance. Throwing your arms around his neck, you lower yourself slowly, taking him inch by inch. Frankie buries his face in the crook of your neck and meets you halfway, thrusting up to seat himself fully inside you. He always seems even bigger when you’re on top, and he gives you a moment to adjust to being so well-filled.

“You good?”

“You have no idea.”

He smiles at that, clearly pleased. “Then tell me,” he urges, kissing you just below your ear. “Tell me how much you like me stretching you out on this big dick.”

Your eyes flutter closed at this. He knows what dirty talk does to you, knows exactly when it will be the most devastating. “It feels so fucking good, baby,” you assure him. “You’re so thick and you hit so deep. I can’t get enough, want you even deeper. Please, Frankie.”

He sucks hard at your pulse point, his tongue laving your neck as he begins to thrust up into you. “Anything, baby. I will give you anything you ask for. You know that, right?”

Gasping, you nod quickly. “I know, love. I know.”

His fingers tangle in your hair, his strong arms bracing you as he fucks up into you. You match each thrust, grinding yourself on the base of his cock. The two of you find your rhythm and you lean back, allowing him to hit at an even deeper angle. Frankie leans forward, able to reach your breasts now. He sucks a nipple into his mouth, all wet heat and slick tongue moving against you. You whimper and arch your back, trusting him to support you.

He does.

Frankie’s eyes are screwed shut as he pounds into you, determined to take care of you before finding his own release. Your whimpering cries plateau and he can tell you’re not quite there yet. He rests his forehead against yours without missing a beat, opening his eyes to gaze into yours. “What do you need, baby?” He asks it softly, reverently, his large hands cradling your face as if you’re something holy. With him looking at you like this, you almost feel that way.

“Talk to me, Frankie,” you gasp. “Want to hear how much you like this.”

Your want pulls an answering moan from him. “God, you know I fucking love this. You’re so tight, and you take me so well, baby. I could pound this pretty pussy all day.” He snaps his hips, driving himself deeper inside you as if to prove his point.

Your breathing comes faster, your cunt clenching around him as his words drive you closer to your edge. “Fuck, yes, just like that. I’m so close, baby,” you whine.

Frankie cants his hips, hitting that devastating spot deep inside you. His voice is even huskier as he urges you onward. “You have no idea what hearing that does to me, sweet thing,” he pants, sweat dampening his hairline. He runs the back of his hand distractedly over his forehead. He’s not about to let go before you do and he leans in close, his warm breath ghosting against your ear. “ Come for me. I know you want to. I can feel you clenching around me so be my good girl and come for me, sweetheart . ”

And just like that, a wave of sweet pleasure rolls through you. You clutch his shoulders as the two of you ride it together, Frankie moaning against your lips as he finds his own release.

Your head drops to his shoulder, your limbs quivering as little aftershocks zip through them. Frankie holds your limp form easily, dropping lazy kisses over your face and hair while you drift back to the present. Finally, you draw back, a dazed smile tugging at your lips. You blow out a breath along with a tired, please laugh. “That was-”

Frankie chuckles, his eyes crinkling at the corners, pleased to have pleased you. “I know, baby.” His kisses are easy, unhurried, and still make you feel nearly drunk with happiness as the two of you linger lazily in your afterglow.

By now, the sun is truly setting, the horizon taking on a purple hue as the first evening stars begin to appear. Even in Frankie’s arms, you start to shiver as the breeze whispers over your rapidly cooling skin. In a deft move, he tugs at the edge of the old quilt, rolling the two of you into it, creating a cocoon of private warmth. As the sky darkens and more stars appear, the two of you stay wrapped up in each other, making plans for your future in the peaceful space you’re creating together.

[mrs-hollandstan]

More Than Perfect || Sam Holland

Warnings: mentions of nudity, mentions of childbirth and the complications afterwards, self-doubt, language?, babiessss, Sam just being a supportive cutie

Word Count: 1,720

Author’s Note: Hopefully you guys enjoy a little bit of dad!Sam. Lemme know :) Also, huge credit to @/marsbudge on Instagram for the picture on the right. She’s amazing in expressing her beauty and is the whole reason I created this piece. Moms/ women in general are fucking superheroes. 

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There was nothing like having a baby. You were told that once you had a little one, your life would change and you would never understand the absolute love you have for this tiny human you'd made. When you and Sam got pregnant with your daughter, he was infatuated with your naked body. The tummy and the thick thighs and the ever growing breasts. Not that you yourself particularly minded being nude around your fiancè or just in general, especially when it just so happened that in the worst weeks of your pregnancy you'd be in the middle of summer. 

When your belly popped towards the bottom, blossoming up the further you got in your pregnancy, Sam lost his mind. He loved the bump and when his hands wandered, it's often where they ended up. More than anything, Sam appreciated the changes your body went through, especially the stretch marks around your thighs, hips, and belly. The boy was obsessed. That's why his Instagram blew up with pictures of your belly, pictures from the baby shower, of the nursery, of her closet, her name board above the crib, and eventually her when she arrived in the beginning of August. 

Virginia Elizabeth was what you named her and Sam, just as much as when she was in your belly, was obsessed with her. She was constantly in his arms and he admired each one of her little features on the daily, dressing her, feeding her (if you couldn't of course), changing her, rocking her to sleep. He was an all around great father. 

Especially because of the pain and exhaustion he inevitably and guiltily felt he inflicted on you. Your bump remained for a few weeks, but what it left, Sam saw, made you slightly depressed. Your feet were still swollen, your breasts were huge but your belly was starting to sag, and the bleeding was ridiculous. You slept most of the time because of the constant milk production and late nights, but Sam didn't mind taking Virginia out into the living room and kitchen, especially if his brothers were over to see their baby girl. 

However, after about a month you'd gotten somewhat used to being a mom and feeding her late at night with Sam right there at your side, giddy smile on his face the entire time at the look of his girls. He loved introducing you as his girls and going to see family and friends with your bubbly little girl in his arms. But something that seemed to remain after all of it was the nudity in your house. 

Sam found that most times he came to find you napping, you were nude beneath the blanket. Not that he minded. Easy access to the skin of your back and belly and thighs. He actually loved the sight and hoped that when he went back to culinary school and eventually went to work as a chef in one of your local restaurants, you'd still be like that, something to look forward to when he climbed into bed with you. 

With a day off from work but not from school, Sam was off in the afternoon and back before the sun started to set, walking up the stoop with a smile on his face. Even a few hours spent away from his girls was torturous. Shouldering the door open, he drops his bag just inside, kicking his shoes off just beside it, 

"Babe?" He calls. There's no reply, a frown covering Sam's face as he walks towards the nursery. He pauses in the doorway of your bedroom when he sees you, smiling to himself. You stand just before your bed, nude with your little girl, only clad in a diaper, in your arms. Your eyes are closed as you sway from side to side, the little one whimpering softly. Walking into the room, Sam stands with his hands on his hips, 

"Look at you two." He says softly. You open your eyes slowly, glancing at him. His smile is so wide you don't know how it fits on his face. He takes a deep, breathless like breath, looking you over, "You two are so perfect." He mumbles before he walks forward again, coming to stand behind you. His hands rest over your hips, lips pressed to your temple, 

"You smell like biscuits." You murmur softly, not faltering in the swaying, even as you lean back against his chest. He chuckles softly, 

"Orange cardamom biscuits. They'd go good with your tea, I'll have to make them sometime for you." He explains softly. You nod, lips pressing against Virginia's cheek. Her little face is turned up towards the ceiling, mouth hanging open as she fights sleep. You sigh, 

"I uhh, I took a shower, put her in that little bouncy thing just outside the shower and she got fussy cause it was hot in the bathroom. So I took her out of her onesie and was holding her and I just... her skin on mine felt amazing. Like yours does. And I miss her. I miss..." Sam can see the tears in your eyes now, "I miss my baby bump and being in the hospital smelling that newborn smell and all that." You tell him. He nods, 

"Its the postpartum peach. You know it'll pass and you'll have so much fun with her when she's older. Plus... the older she gets, the closer we are to havin another one. More of that newborn smell." He reasons. The look you throw him over your shoulder makes him swallow, 

"Alright... yeah, still traumatized from her birth, got it but... you don't have to be so upset. She's still little and perfect... both my girls are, and for the next... what, year, that won't change. She'll get nice and chunky and when she changes, we'll so be ready for it. She'll get giggly and fun and you'll love it. I know you will babe." He reassures. You nod, 

"I know I just can't help it. It feels like someone else is controlling my life, my emotions. I'm sorry." 

"You don't have to apologize Y/N. Your body, your mind are going through a lot of changes. You're maturing and all that. I'm not upset about it. The crying, from you or her doesn't bother me. At least there's some need for me." He half jokes. You smile, looking down at your baby girl. He sighs, 

"I'm really likin this naked thing with you though." He mutters, kissing your shoulder as he molds your hips in his hands. You hum, 

"Sometimes I'm just too lazy to get dressed, other times it's just too hot." You reason. Sam nods, 

"I like it." 

"Oh yeah?" He nods when you glance up at him, "Maybe you should join the party then. I wanna stare at her and she likes daddy's chest." He doesn't even need you to finish the before he's stripping from the grease and oil stained shirt and pants, leaving them in a pile on the floor as you sit at the edge of the bed. You scoot to your side, letting Sam lay down before you before you lay Virginia over his chest. He mumbles incoherently down at her, kissing the top of her head as he strokes down her back. He purrs which makes her whimper, the motion further lulling her to sleep. He glances over at you when you prop your head up on your hand, 

"You're a great father Sam. You've always been an awkward little bean but... when it comes to V, you do amazing." He chuckles softly, 

"Thanks Y/N/N. You two... mean the world." He admits, rubbing up and down your baby's back softly. You sigh, brushing his unruly curls aside, 

"I'm just glad that I don't have to cook. The food you make is excellent and you like doing it and baby loves it too." He laughs again, 

"And that's all that matters is making you both happy." He murmurs. There's a silence that permeates between you for a moment before you stand, finding the thin robe you wear all the time if it genuinely is too hot to wear anything else, 

"What was this... thing you were saying about orange cardamom biscuits?" You ask with a cock of your eyebrow. He smiles wide, tip of his tongue caught between his teeth, 

"I'm starting to think ALL you use me for is food." 

"I feed your little girl from my own body like eight times a day. The LEAST you could do is make bomb fucking food Holland." He hums after a moment, eyes averted from yours and to the little girl laid across his chest. He glances back up, 

"Can we just... have a little longer of this moment? Just a pretty little family before I'm whisked away to slave over a stove." He jokes. After a moment of staring at each other, you sigh, trying to fight your smile before you near the bed again, sitting at his side, 

"Fine Samuel. But only because you're pretty." You lean in to kiss his nose, kissing your baby girl's head just below his chin, "And you too little miss. I just hope you at least get something from me for all the pain and suffering I went through getting you here." Sam reaches up to tuck hair behind your ear, 

"You're a great mumma already. I have no doubt that she'll be witty and perfectly perfect. With a mum like you she'll always know she can never disappoint us with whatever decision or life choice she makes. You'll make sure of it and that's what matters. Raising a decent fucking human being." He says with such passion in his eyes you think you'll faint. You stare at him for another moment before sighing, 

"I love you more than anything on this earth Samuel Holland. Our little family is just perfect right now." You tell him. Leaning up to kiss you, he sighs, 

"Love my girls in all of their beautiful nudity. Love skin to skin." He murmurs. You lay your head against his shoulder, watching your girl sleep. Of course pregnancy and motherhood was difficult, but your fiancè made it so much better and your baby girl was everything and more for the both of you.

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[kippykasey]

Snowdrop Chpt 4

Paring: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 4115

Series Summary: Bringing Zemo in to help fight against the rise of the new group of super soldiers brings in a new, yet familiar face into the mix.

Chapter Summary: The team found the refugee camp and now look for information on Donya Madani.

Chapter Warnings: Episode level violence.

A/N: If you missed it there is now a drabble that talks a bit more about how Reader got the nickname 'Amazing Grace'. Also send me feedback! I would love to hear your thoughts about the story so far.

Disclaimer: All languages that are not English were provided by Google translator with the translations following in bolden italics. Gifs used were found under the gif tab provided by tumblr.

Catch up on Snowdrop here: (1) (2) (3)

Sam was on the phone with a member of the air force to get information on Donya Madani, the refugee that is the next lead. Bucky was lounging on a sofa-like bench intently trying to clean his metal hand. With a slight nudge to the man’s leg on the seat he pulled it in, not looking up at the woman who lowered herself into the seat across from him, one leg tucked underneath herself. She held her hand out wiggling her fingers next to where his eyes were trained on his own hands. The blue eyes raised up off his hands to look into her waiting eyes. His eyes rolled as he silently placed the cloth into her hand, extending his arm so his hand was in her reach. She silently began to clean, his hand making sure to get into every nook and cranny that she could.

Sam’s call with Torres ended and he sat down letting out a deep sigh. Bucky turned his head, pulling his eyes away from the smaller hands working to clean his prosthetic. “You okay?” the man across the aisle from him turned his head to look at him before looking back up at the dimly lit ceiling of the plane. “Yeah. Just thinking about all the shit Sharon had to go through. And Nagel referring to the American test subject like Isaiah wasn’t even a real person. How many people have to get steamrolled to make way for this hunk of metal.”

Bucky’s attention turned back down to the palm of his hand that was now in the process of being cleaned. “Well it depends on who you ask. That hunk of metal saved a lot of lives.” (Y/n) never looked up from her task as she listened. Barnes turned back to Sam making sure he understood that he was fully listening. “Yeah, I get that all right. Maybe I made a mistake.” There was a slight nod from Bucky as he verbally agreed, “You did.” There was a slight pressure in his hand as it was squeezed by the woman as a sign of her disapproval.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have put it in a museum. I should have destroyed it.” Sam’s admission made her raise her head and look over at him, her hand stopping from cleaning. “That shield may cause a lot of fuss but it also means alot to some people. It’s the person behind the shield that brings a problem.” The woman spoke up for the first time. Bucky say up pulling his hand out of her grasp while doing so, “Like me, that shield means something to me. So before you destroy it, I’ll take it from Walker myself.” Conversation paused and like she always did a comforting hand rubbed small circles in the ex Winter Soldier’s back. The anger slowly left his face in the blank stare he mastered, but there was a softness in his eyes.

Zemo carried over some food as Sam answered his ringing phone. He passed one of the plates over to the two ex HYDRA soldiers and set the other down for Sam. Sam spoke on the phone, most likely to Torres, while he watched the two across from him effortlessly pick at the plate they were sharing. “They found Madani...dead. She died in Riga, a city near the Baltic Sea.” Sam informed everyone. Zemo holds a finger up and nods, “I have a place we can go.” The baron sits back in his seat, “I for one am looking forward to coming face to face with Karli.”

With the new heading set and food eaten everyone was settling for the remainder of the flight, and most likely to sleep. Bucky was still on the sofa, one leg out on the bench the other hanging off the edge. The nurse was tucked up in his arms, her head resting against his chest. Bucky’s eyes were already closed as he started to drift to sleep. However the woman he held onto was still awake looking across the aisle and out the window of the plane. Her view was blocked by Sam as he came back from the restroom. He turned to face them and their eyes met for a moment before he glanced over at Zemo who had a sleep mask over his eyes. “So what’s the story between you two? Were you two ever like a thing?” Sam’s voice was soft not to disturb those already asleep, especially Bucky.

“No. When we first met I was engaged. Not saying HYDRA didn’t want us to be.” She answered looking slightly up at the sleeping man holding her so casually. “What do you mean?” The woman’s eyebrows furrowed and she just slightly nuzzled into the warm chest below her, the owner’s arms flexing around her waist. “They wanted us to reproduce and create genetic super soldiers. Never got that far.” Sam watched how peaceful the two looked laying together on the small sofa bench, comfortable even. “You went back for him and you were engaged.” Sam pointed out to her. “He saved me. That day Steve broke him out of isolation in that camp. He came for me. Since then I swore myself I would keep those two idiots safe. I think my engagement unofficially ended the day I refused to get on that plane to the US and instead became the nurse for the Commandos.” A ghost of a smile appeared on the woman’s face as she went on. “He ended up having a son, who turned out just like his dad. Even had a granddaughter too. I got the chance to meet them, kind of. Maybe once this is all over I’ll get the family I wanted.” Her voice slowly began to soften into a slur as she began to fall asleep.

Sam sat there for a moment. He never thought Bucky Barnes could ever look so peaceful but he did. Normally even napping the man was stiff as a board but this was completely different. Here he was asleep, head lulled to the side resting against the back of the sofa, a woman in his arms, and not a scowl or anything visible on his face. It's interesting how much you can learn from someone just from watching them sleep, as weird as that may be. Sam smiled at the two before turning his head and letting himself fall asleep.

【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】

Riga, Latvia was the new location the group found themselves in. The group walked in a ‘T’ shape, Zemo leading with the other three following, (Y/n) in the middle. As Zemo led the way he mentioned Sokovia and how it was taken over by the neighbors before the land could even be cleaned up. Now it doesn’t even exist. As they turned the corner to one of Zemo’s many residences Bucky began to fall back from the group.

“James?” The soft voice of the nurse called to him. The man’s head turned to her and smiled softly. “I’m just going to go on a walk.” His statement drew the other two men’s attention as they stopped walking to turn towards the taller man. “You good?” Sam asked. “Yeah,” Bucky started to walk backwards. “I’ll see you guys in a bit.” The nurse turned to follow out of habit but Sam wrapped his arm around her. “He’ll be okay.” He told her even as her eyes still trailed Bucky as he left for his walk.

With the three of them now inside the apartment sized space (Y/n) ran her fingers through her hair hissing slightly at the knots and tangles in it. “You really care for him don’t you?” Sam asked her softly, making the woman glance at him with large doe eyes playing innocent. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Wilson.” She tapped against the bar top that she leaned against and looked at Sam. “I am curious though, Bucky’s new arm, where is it from?” Sam crossed his arms looking at the woman who wouldn’t meet his eye, “Wakanda. He spent some time there.” She nods and smiles at the realization that the metal his arm was made out of. “I visited Wakanda once. Back in, well I guess it was 1940 maybe even 1939 I can’t remember exactly. It’s where I was proposed to. It’s probably much different now than it was then. Maybe in the future I can see it again.” Sam watched the far off look clouding over her eyes. The conversation died after that, neither pushing farther.

Zemo had taken a bath before Bucky had returned, the closing of the doors announcing his arrival. “Well, the Wakandans are here. They want Zemo. Bought us some more time.” Bucky spoke as he walked towards the bar where everyone was centered around. “Ouch Sam.” The nurse hissed as the comb Sam had been pulling through her hair got caught. Bucky raised an eyebrow at the sight before him. “Were you followed?” Sam asked, ignoring the woman as he put down the comb. “No.” Although amused by Sam combing someone’s hair, his voice didn’t reveal anything. “How can you be so sure?” Zemo asked, peeking through the stained glass window. The nurse’s head whipped around as she stared at the back of the baron’s head like he was crazy. “‘Cause I know when I’m being followed.”

Zemo turned from the window to look at Bucky, “It was sweet of you to defend me at least.” Sam merely turned his head over his shoulder to speak to the German. “Hey, you shut it. No one’s defending you. You killed Nagel.” The woman in the room rolled her eyes as she hopped off the bar stool she was perched on to walk behind the bar. Her hand just barely brushed Bucky’s back, unseen by anyone else in the room, as she passed to grab a glass and pour herself a drink as she listened to the men. “Do we really have to litigate what may or may not have happened?” Sam’s eyebrows furrowed as his eyes moved left and right, “There’s nothing to litigate. You straight shot the man.” Zemo raised a hand to point at the only woman in the room, “She wanted to.”

“Sam,” Bucky called, drawing an end to their little argument. Sam turned his attention to Barnes who was standing on the opposite side of the bar from him. “What?” Bucky glanced up from his phone for a moment before informing him, “Karli bombed a GRC supply depot.” “What? What’s the damage?” The slight influx in Sam’s voice showed slight surprise and interest. “Eleven injured, three dead.” The nurse next to Bucky looked over his shoulder. “Where is it close enough to help?” She asked, trying to see a location. “Sugar, you are more help with us,” Bucky told her before continuing to inform Sam, “They have a list of demands and are promising more attacks if those demands aren’t met.” Sam let out a deep sigh, one that could visibly be seen pulling the man’s shoulders down. “She’s getting worse.” Helmut pointed out the obvious. He stood at the end of the bar between both Sam and Bucky. “We,” He began before the nurse shook her head and pointed at him. “Nuh-uh. Do not wrap me in with you. I’m done. I am here to help because of the serum. As soon as this is all over I am going with Sam or Bucky.”

“Fine. I have the will to complete this mission. Do the three of you?” The Baron tried again this time changing his phrasing. “She’s just a kid.” Sam reminded him. Zemo turned to him and shook his head. “You’re seeing something in her that isn’t there.” Sam sat back as he listened, eyebrows furrowed. “You’re clouded by it. She’s a supremacist.” Bucky’s head tilted and his eyes glanced over at the woman slightly behind him who was looking down at the floor with her arms crossed. “The very concept of a Super Soldier will always trouble people. It’s that warped aspiration that led to Nazis, to Ultron, to the Avengers.” Bucky walked around to the opposite side of the bar from Zemo and leaned against it. “Hey, those are our friends you’re talking about,” Sam warned. “The Avengers, not the Nazis.” Bucky quickly added which made the ex World War II nurse smile and nod her head.

“So, Karli is radicalized, but there has to be a peaceful way to stop her.” Sam turned so he was talking to everyone even if his eyes were primarily on Zemo. The nurse opened her mouth but Zemo began to talk, cutting off what she had to say, “The desire to become a superhuman cannot be separated from the supremacist ideals. Anyone with that serum is inherently on that path. She will not stop. She will escalate until you kill her.” There was a pregnant pause before he adds an afterthought, “Or she kills you.”

Bucky stands up straight as he looks at the man who just spoke, “Maybe you’re wrong Zemo. The serum never corrupted Steve or (Y/n).” The German raised a finger and his eyebrows. “Touche. Yet the former Amazing Grace did turn her back on everything to come after you and helped you within her own free will. She’s probably more guilty than you are. So there really has never been another Steve Rogers, has there?” The woman’s eyes never left the floor as she quickly shuffled her way out from behind the bar to try and get away from the conversation. Yet she was stopped by Bucky who gave her a concerned look. She shook her head and moved farther away.

Her mind involuntarily flashing through ever murder she was assigned to help the Winter Soldier with. She lowered herself onto the couch and held her head trying to will the memories to go away. She could feel the intense concerned look on her back from Bucky as he spoke. “Well, maybe we should give him to the Wakandans right now.” His voice got closer as he neared the woman currently lost in the dark corners of her mind. “And you’ll give up your tour guide?” Zemo asked while opening cabinets. “Yes.” Bucky’s answer was as firm as the warm hand that fell onto the woman’s shoulder.

“From my understanding, Donya is like a pillar of the community, right? So when I was a kid my TT passed away.” Sam spoke as Bucky’s hand rubbed gentle circles around the woman’s back as he sat next to her, the way he remembers her comforting him years before. His hand hesitates just as much as his voice as he asks, “Your TT?” Sam turns to him and nods, “Yeah my TT.” Bucky’s face scrunched up in confusion as he slowly started to rub her back again, “Who is your TT?” Sam rolled his eyes and holds his arms up, “Fine. When I was a kid, my aunt passed away and the entire neighborhood got together for a ceremony. It was like a week long. Maybe they’re doing the same thing for Donya.”

(Y/n) slowly raised her head as she focused on what Sam said instead of the nightmares in her memories. “It’s worth a shot.” Bucky comments looking back at the woman next to him. She looked into his eyes and he gave her a silent nod of understanding. She leaned her head against his shoulder for a moment and took a deep breath. Then under her breath she whispered to him, “Do you think Sam was a dorky looking kid?” She felt his shoulder shake in a small silent laugh. “Definitely.” The two laughed silently as Zemo made a comment about how Sam’s TT would be proud of him. The woman stood up and ruffled the dark hair of the man next to her, earning her one of his signature stares. “I’m going to wash up a bit then we can head into town and look for more leads.” She told them men before leaving to the bathroom.

【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】

With their trusty ‘tour guide’, as he so graciously called himself, the group headed out to gather information. Zemo talked about the location they were at with fond memories from his childhood where the place they stood once was home to grand parties. Standing at the entrance the group divided into two. Zemo and Bucky stayed on the ground lever and courtyard while Sam and (Y/n) went to see what was upstairs.

(Y/n) stayed at Sam’s side but followed his lead as she looked around the building. Spotting a kid Sam followed him, calling out to him once, as they entered what looked to be a workplace for seamstress’. “Excuse me, have you heard of Donya Madani?” Sam spoke gently but the women quickly got up and left. Sam looked over his shoulder at the woman scanning the room behind him, then adjusted the case in front of him to show her the red handprint symbol of the flag smashers. They continued to walk through the upstairs rooms, each time they came across someone to ask about Donya they would quickly leave the room. Each room having at least one item with the flag smasher’s insignia on it. (Y/n)’s brow had furrowed by the second room. She glanced out the window, down at the courtyard where she could see Bucky and Zemo.

Finally they moved onto probably the final room, a small smile falling onto the woman’s face as she saw the children’s crafts in the makeshift classroom. “Excuse me.” Sam called out to the sole teacher in the room, who was kneeling down next to one of the desk’s helping a child. The man turned his head towards them and Sam continued to ask him, “Do you know a woman by the name of Donya Madani? She was a refugee here.” The man stood and turned towards Sam. “We’re not refugees, for we have nothing to seek refuge from. We’re internationally-displaced persons, for what it's worth, and we don’t trust outsiders.” The man pat the student he was helping on the back as if giving him permission to leave since the kid stood and exited the room.

“No, I understand, “ Sam spoke and there was a certain calmness to his voice, something soothing about it. “I’m not from here, but I have a pretty good track record of helping out.” The man in front of her looked as non threatening as he could make himself so she tried to relax and do the same but her eyes kept scanning the room as she listened. “I know what happens when people say they’re going to help. Nothing. The Global Repatriation Council promised to send more teachers, supplies. That was six months ago.” The woman’s head snapped around at the news. How could things have gotten so bad? She frowned as she looked over to the two smaller children in the room. “What’s your name? Maybe I can make a call?” The man shook his head. “I know who you are. But I can’t trust you. I’m sorry. “ He turned to the two children, picking one up as the other went to leave the room. Sam watched them leave and the woman behind him ran her hand over one of the desks. “Sam,” She whispered out the raw emotion for how much she wanted to help these people clear in her voice. “I know.” His voice, while more stable, held the same sadness in it. “Let’s head back down.”

Sam and (Y/n) came to stand on either side of Bucky who was watching Zemo interact with some local kids. “It’s starting to feel like a dead end.” Sam mentions as he too watched Zemo. “The hell is he doing?” Bucky said the same question they were all asking themselves. “Being smart. We won’t get anything out of the adults, they don’t trust us. Kids however, they don’t know any better yet. Is that...turkish delight?” Her head tilted to the side as she watched. Zemo stood and handed a handful of the candy to the children. The baron then turned to walk over and join the waiting trio. “Cute kids.” He comments, walking by the three of them. “He’s up to something and I don’t like it.” (Y/n) muttered putting her hands into the back pockets of her pants.

Without much information to go on they returned back to the apartment. “I got nothin’.” Bucky sighed, “No one’s talkin’ about Donya.” Zemo made a straight line to pour himself a drink while Bucky went to sit on the couch along with Sam and (Y/n). “No surprise there.” She comments before Sam explains,” Karli is the only one fighting for them. They have no need to cross her. And she’s not wrong.” Bucky sighs, turning his head towards them. “What do you mean?” Sam slaps his knees and holds his head back for a moment. “For five years people have been welcomed into countries that have kept them out using barbed wire. There were houses and jobs. Folks were happy to have people around to help them rebuild. It wasn’t just one community coming together, it was the entire world coming together. And then, boom.” Sam snapped to make emphasis on the event that brought everyone back. “Just like that, it goes right back to the way it used to be. To them at least Karli’s doin’ somethin’.”

“You really think her ends justify her means? Then she’s no different than him or anybody else we’ve fought.” Bucky replied, gesturing to Zemo who was pouring himself tea. “She’s different from them. She’s not motivated by the same things.” Zemo carried in the tray that held all of the fixings for the tea he had just prepared. Bucky turned to him, “That little girl. What’d she tell you?” Zemo looked at each of them before answering as he set the tray onto the table. “The funeral is this afternoon.”

The information peeked everyone’s attention. Out of the corner of her eye (Y/n) watched as Bucky’s jaw muscle flexed, a sign that he was annoyed or getting upset. “You know the Dora’s coming for you any minute. In fact, they’re probably lurking outside right now. Keep talking.” However the threat didn’t scare Zemo into telling him any more. “Leaving you to turn on me once we get to Karli. Hmm, I prefer to keep my leverage.” The woman in the room rubbed her temple as she mentally thought about how this may turn out. Bucky standing up from his seat and rounding the coffee table to stand in front of the man he helped escape prison, yeah that definitely wasn’t a positive one.

The low clink of the glove-covered vibranium hand against the cup Zemo was holding only took seconds to become a shattering splash of the cup hitting the pillar behind Zemo’s head. Bucky’s jaw was set as his hard gaze locked onto the shorter man in front of him. “You wanna see what someone can do with leverage?” The low rumble threat that came from Bucky made the woman slide to the edge of the couch and prepare herself to jump in to stop him. “James.” She said at the same time Sam stood and said. “Take it easy. Don’t engage him.” Sam held his hand out right above Bucky’s chest. “He’s just going to extort you and do that stupid head tilt thing.”

(Y/n) stood from the couch and moved to Bucky’s side. Sam glanced at her and she gave a nod. “Let me make a call.” Sam told them as her hand gently grabbed onto Bucky’s elbow, the man’s attention still locked onto the baron. Sam walked away, patting Barnes’ on the shoulder as he did. With Sam gone, Helmut spoke again. “You want some cherry blossom tea?” Bucky finally broke his eye contact to look down at the tea. “No, you go ahead.” Bucky turned in the direction that Sam walked and gently patted the small hand on his elbow before walking off.

“Keeping information from them won’t keep you from being taken back into custody Zemo. Not to mention playing with him needs to stop. Or maybe next time I’ll be the one you need to handle. Do you understand?” The voice she spoke in was calm even as Zemo let out the breath he was holding. “You feel like that with him staring you down, try not upsetting us both.” She gave a friendly smile as her hand reached up to gently pat the side of his face.

[realyouearthing01]

The benefits and advantages of Earthing / Grounding for animals/pets – Grounding to the Earth

As you will discover in this post, pets also benefit from Earthing / Grounding. So here is the testimony of different people who tell their experience with their animals and Earthing / Grounding, the connection to the earth.

When indoors, pets sense something familiar and beneficial when they come in contact with an Earthing mat or other grounding product.  They are definitely drawn to Earthing.  Although they can’t articulate what they feel, their actions and responses speak louder than words, as these accounts clearly indicate:.  Here is a sampling of feedback:

Extending Quality and Quantity of Life

The second edition of the Earthing book (2014) included a report from Sandra Wong, a musician in Boulder, Colorado, about how Earthing was helping her aged Grand Pyrenees dog, “Raffie.”

In 2013, she had first told us that “Raffie,” then 11, was suffering from severe, painful arthritis and multiple structural issues. She had exhausted conventional options, including medication that just made him sick to his stomach. She was reluctantly considering putting him down. Then a friend suggested Earthing and she obtained an Earthing throw for the dog. The results, she said, were striking. “Raffie” began resting and sleeping grounded. His energy amazingly returned, as did his mobility and zest for life.

In April 2014, the dog passed. “He made it to a miraculous 12 years of age, almost unheard of for his breed,” Sandra told us. “Grounding gave him an entire extra year of life and with quality that I didn’t think was possible.”

In early 2015, she told us she has helped other animals with Earthing. “The week before ‘Raffie’ passed, ‘Mosey,’ went into a steep downward spiral and was diagnosed with the lumbosacral disease, among other things. She’s another one of my Pyrenees. Her back legs were going out much of the time. She had full urinary and fecal incontinence. The vets didn’t have much to offer but after several months of using homeopathic remedies and encouraging her to spend more time on the Earthing throw, she has made a rather miraculous turnaround. She has been able to walk to and from the backyard without assistance. Her urinary incontinence and 99 percent of all accidents have stopped in the last three months. ‘Mosey’ is now 13 years old and a few months, and although fragile, she’s going stronger than I could have imagined possible with the only changes being nerve tonic (homeopathic), Traumeel (homeopathic), and her Earthing throw.”

Sandra continued: “A friend of mine has a rescue black Lab/chow mix with severe hip dysplasia. The old dog took a turn for the worse with the coming of colder weather. The pain meds he was prescribed left him lethargic, yelping, and disoriented. My friend put him on similar homeopathic as ‘Mosey’ and installed an Earthing throw, as I had done, in the dog’s bed. Now, two months later, it’s as if the dog was two years younger. He’s clear-eyed, connected, happy, and exhibited significantly less pain.

“Earthing also helped my mother’s dog, my grandmother’s dog, and my other Pyrenees, ‘Serafina.’”

In 2017, we heard from Sandra again. Both “Mosey” (14 ½) and “Serafina” (13 ½) had died the year before, 18 days apart. “However, both of them had a good quality of life up until the very end, despite their advanced age, with the help of the Earthing throw,” she said. “’ Serafina’ had a stroke shortly after ‘Mosey’ passed. I think she missed her sister.

“All this is to say, in my experience, Earthing is incredibly helpful to animals, including older ones with sensitive systems who reactive negatively to strong medications.”

Less Shedding

From Yavor Kresic in Ottawa: “My Siamese ‘Alexander’ loves going on the mat. I’ve noticed that he hardly sheds now. He’s an older cat and rarely goes out.”

More Comfort, Less Itching

From Ambien Hay of Vero Beach, Florida: “‘Jackson,’ my Jack Russell, loved his Earthing mat. It relieved his arthritis and pain due to Lyme disease during the last years of his life. He died at 16. After sleeping on it all night, he clearly felt more comfortable in the morning, as he pranced outside and had his breakfast.

“‘Sailor,’ my 12-year-old Westie, heads for his Earthing mat any chance he gets! He has been Earthing for more than eight years and is healthy and happy. The mat helped relieve his skin allergies and itchiness. He hogs my Earthing mat under the computer desk, his favorite place to snooze.

“All creatures large and small love to be connected to Mother Earth!”

In 2012, Karen Kolczak from Phoenix told us she obtained a mat for her cat after experiencing the benefits of Earthing herself. She said: “My old cat doesn’t get outside much anymore, but now she is going up and down the stairs much more frequently and curls up to me purring on the bed as if to say ‘thanks mom.’”

In early 2015, Karen reported that her cat had passed away and that she brought a new cat into the house who “loves the mat as well.”

Togetherness

New Hampshire researcher James Oschman sent this picture (below) from a doctor friend who commented: “Here are my daughter’s three cats. Ordinarily, they stake out separate rooms for their morning naps, but this is what they’ve been doing since I came to visit and installed an Earthing sheet on the guest bed.”

More Togetherness

From Linda Olk in Winston-Salem: “I have five dogs and a cat. And most of them, along with me, have been Earthing since 2013. The dogs get their indoor ‘dosing’ at night like I do, and sleep on the Earthing sheet I put over the sofa. Sometimes all of them pile on at one time. From time to time, some of them jump into my bed and onto the Earthing sheet. I have to shoo them off.

“The animals have all been in good health. After I added the Earthing sheet, they absolutely became calmer. Not that they had been rowdy or unruly, but they carried a certain agitation. That changed a lot.

“When the cat developed an infection from a bite, I noticed he spent more time than usual stretched full out on the Earthing mat I placed in the living room under my desk. The cat usually stays outside, right on the ground, under a tree, except when it’s very cold. Then I set the mat out and typically he gravitates to it.

“After I bought an Earthing yoga mat for myself, the dogs, and even the cat, want to lay on it. I sometimes have to shove them off when it comes time to do my exercise.”

It Works in Finland, too

Sisko Pynnonen from Kangasniemi says her dog usually sleeps on the floor during the winter and outside on the ground when the weather is warmer. “After I put an Earthing sheet on my bed, ‘Tahvo’ started to climb up into the bed in order to be able to sleep on the sheet. One night he even brought a bone into the bed. He seems to sigh with relief when he sleeps on the sheet…and sleeps there all night!”

Satu Laitinen, from Siilinjarvi, says her cats love the Earthing plush pad and compete to use it.

Maine Cats Know When They Need Mother Earth

From JJ, in Maine: “My two indoor cats don’t seem unusually drawn to Earthing sheets or their grounded pet beds when they’re healthy. However, when my cat Cleo had an inflamed paw pad, we noticed her resting on my daughter’s Earthing sheet in an unusual manner, with her arm stretched straight out in front of her, the sore paw pad placed gingerly on the grounded sheet.

“My other cat, ‘Pixie’ is an obsessive washer. Since she’s been sleeping grounded (two years), her fur has grown back on her sides and some on her tummy. Grounding seems to relax her and reduce the hyperexcitability of her condition.”

Don’t Get Crushed!

From Deborah Ebbers, Suttons Bay, Michigan: “I have a story concerning my earthing journey, started one and a half months ago. I bought the earthing mat for my bed and the results have been very positive; deep sleep, arthritic pain reduction, calm energy… and now my dog (who sleeps with me) has decided that since I’m earthed that it is perfectly natural for her to sleep on top of me……. there’s one little problem…she’s a Great Dane. Beatrix is 116 pounds!”

They Hog the Bed!

From Tina Morin, a German Shepherd breeder in North Bay, Ontario: “I have 7 dogs and they all try to get a piece of the mat on the floor lol I have a sheet on my bed and sometimes I catch them up on there too. They all sleep on it or on my bed lol as I have a grounding sheet there. They sure gravitate to grounding.”

Golden Retriever in Healing High Gear

Karen Poizin of Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin, reported that “Lance,” her Golden Retriever, had surgery to remove a large lipoma in his armpit in December of 2013. He slept on a pet mat during his recovery and, according to the veterinarian, “he healed quickly.”

“Juniper the Rat” − Life after a Stroke

Diane Higgins, of Toronto, is an ardent animal rescuer. “From fish to horses,” she says, and including rats. In 2015, she communicated to us about “Juniper,” her very senior and nearly three-year-old hooded female pet rat. The rodent had had a stroke, a fairly common affliction among elderly rats, and often fatal.

“I’ve become all too familiar with the symptoms but this time I had a new weapon and so I decided to use one of the Earthing bands,” Diane recounted. “Rats, no matter how well we feed and take care of them, don’t live very long, but if this could improve the quality of her life, I was all for it. Often there’s nothing you can do to help them in these situations, the time between a stroke and their unfortunate demise is swift.

“’ Juniper’ is one tough little gal. She had difficulty getting around so I decided to try the band on her and within twenty minutes she was able to raise her head. Within an hour she was able to use her legs again. After a few hours, she exhibited more mobility and was able to lift her head.

“I put her in a safe, warm, and comfortable location with the band attached (she had wiggled out of it once, but I got her back into it) and she settled in and let the band do its thing.

“I got the shock of my life the next morning. ‘Juniper’ had climbed onto the roof of her mouse house ALL BY HERSELF!! She climbed up and ate breakfast! She gave me a bit of trouble getting her into the band this morning but I got her in. She has MUCH better mobility and is much improved.

“She does the rat equivalent of purring (bruxing) when she is in the band. This can also occur when a rat is upset, but she seems to be a happy little rat when she does this.

“On the third day, she was having less problem holding her food, all the red stuff around her eyes is gone. That’s porphyrin, a secretion indicative of stress, sickness, or poor diet. Her eyes look clear and her coat feels silky.”

“On day five, she continued doing well. She has made daily progress. The old girl is now able to get all the way up to the third tier of the cage. She seems to recognize her limitations with ‘down.’ She actually signals me when she wants to come down and I either pick her up and place her on the bottom of the cage or I gently ‘escort’ her with my hand and assist her.

“She has never eaten commercial pet food. She gets filtered water, organic fruits, vegetables, nuts, and seeds, as well as avocadoes, bananas, mangoes, grapes, corn on the cob, carrot, spinach leaves, kale, and chaff from my juicing as well.

“Everything has worked in harmony. TLC without Earthing or Earthing without TLC would not have produced these results. When I first started this therapy with her, I was thinking she might not last another day. But she is doing so well and has been a great surprise.”

A week later Diane reported: “She is doing amazing!! She was able to fend off her younger companion ‘Thea,’ when I gave her one of her favorite treats, a piece of Pita bread. ‘Thea’ does NOT share. ‘Juniper’ is now able to drink out of the water bottle on the second cage level now. Her front paws are no longer tensed up and she is able to wash like she used to. She appears very calm and does that bruxing thing, which is so cute and endearing. OMG, she is so smart!”

“Juniper” lived actively for more than a month after her stroke, and then died peacefully. “I hadn’t expected her really to live another day after her stroke,” reported Diane. “She was a real trooper.”

Sweet Dreams

“I actually had to buy myself a second Earthing mat, because the minute I put my mat on the floor to put my feet on while watching TV, my Golden Retriever immediately would make a beeline for it. He then falls into a wonderfully deep sleep with lots of squirrel chasing dreams. For me, this disproves the Earthing doubters who explain Earthing benefits as a placebo effect. Both my dog and I know that earthing REALLY works!”

For more information, please visit https://realyouearthing.com/

[aweebwrites]

Move on Dragons 19

While the ninja were away, and the dragon team was doing rounds with their kin, a certain Sensei was having difficulty tracking down his brother. He’s passed through three realms following his tracks, getting painfully close but still so frustratingly far. He didn’t understand why his brother chose to run. It was out of character for him to do so, no matter what troubles lay between them. While this version of his brother was different, he was still his brother. He needed to get to him, to talk to him and this realm was his chance. He hasn’t been here in some time. The First Realm. There was no fleeing to another realm here. Second to the Never Realm, the First Realm was one of the most distant of the 16 realms, only claiming second place due to the dragons that inhibit its land and skies. They were the only means of leaving the realm if you got to it. He had to visit and speak to the Firstbourne to have her let the other dragons know not to aid him off the realm, not until he’s spoken with him at the very least.

He looked up once a roar caught his ears, a wind dragon descending in his direction, its body long and serpentine like. He reached a hand out and stroked its muzzle once it did land before him, returning it’s low croon of greeting.

‘I need your help. Could you take me to her?’ He asked it and it looked at him with large silvery eyes.

‘Very well.’ The dragon pulled away from his hand and went airborne. ‘Fly with me. It will please her to know you’ve unbound your inner dragon.’ Wu nodded, expecting as much.

After so long without shifting, it took him a moment to grasp the form of his dragon self, but flying came to him as easily as breathing. The First Realm may be as vast as Ninjago, but it is only a matter of time once he lets the Firstbourne know, until he will finally corner his brother and he can receive answers.

 ______

‘Come on. What’s a quick flight near the coast? We come here almost every day and there’s no humans around!’ A speed dragon urged as they, along with other dragons hung out at the cliffs at the edge of Hiroshi’s Labyrinth.

‘I dunno. We’re kinda pushing the boundaries by just being here…’ The mind dragon murmured, looking down at the sea below, their waters far calmer than that of their home.

Perhaps it has to do with the fact that they had more than one moon while this world had a single one…

‘He’s right. The elders and the beings- the humans who are so graciously lending us their home gave us this vast, lush forest to live in and even built us a place to rest our head… We should respect their rules and restrictions. It’s this or certain death.’ The green, poison dragon rumbled as she curled up, ready to take a nap.

The speed dragon frowned.

‘Look, that may be all true and we’re all grateful for their kindness, but this is- this is too-’ He struggles a bit for the proper way to express his feelings. ‘Restricting! You all may be fine with it but other speed dragons are getting painfully restless and aggressive because of it! How am I supposed to tell them to stay calm and thankful when I feel the same way!’ He vented, pacing back and forth rather quickly now, the group watching him.

‘It may be fine for the rest of you but we’re not made for this! You all know we’re the natural explorers of our kind! We fly massive stretches of land just to stretch out wings! Stretches of land several times bigger than this! If it hadn’t been for our kind, we would have never found warmer lands for the winters to migrate to, If it hadn’t been for us, we would have never found new feeding grounds or new foods to lead poison dragons to, to test if they’re edible! We would have never found new caving grounds for earth and metal dragons to dig up minerals and metals! We wouldn't be the advanced race we are if it hadn’t been for us! And this is how we’re repaid? By being caged and being told to be grateful!’ He snapped, all out snarling now.

Morro frowned as he listened in from above, his dark green scales camouflaging him in the high treetops. He glanced away as the speed dragon’s friends told him he was being irrational.

No. He had a point. While the entirety of the dragon race was like a massive flock of birds, they only spent roughly half of their time in one place. When winter reaches the Mountain of a Million Heights where the Sacred Temple all dragon kind knew is home, they scatter further south for the duration of it and won’t return until near summer. Every dragon understood that the elders, his father and uncle, were the sons of the First Dragon, that they would protect and lead them, would care and provide for them, understood that their word was law. It was why, despite their best efforts to seem less intimidating, in size and presence, most dragons had a hard time approaching them about anything. It’s why they had the system set up where they chose a head of each kind of dragon to relay information to them, as they were less intimidating.

But now, as the head of speed as he was, to not carry these concerns to neither his father nor uncle… The confinement must be greatly impacting them. Morro pulled his wings closer, his claws dug in the branches . That, and he’s not even sure if there’s much his father and uncle could do. This was not their world, was not their domain in any way. They had no say over these lands. They could try and speak to the ninja of it but even the ninja could not guarantee that they would be received well. Morro’s tail flicked anxiously as he puzzled over a solution. He hadn’t the blood of the First Dragon in him, nor will he ever be the one to lead the dragons, but Lloydie was his family. He’s understood and accepted this all. Family supports family. He would not leave Lloyd to struggle with all of dragon kind alone. He blinked once a blur of whie and red shot off the cliff, his eyes widening as the head of speed flew quickly away from the edge of the cliffs, out of sight in seconds.

The other heads, of poison, mind, shadow and ash stood anxiously at the edge of the cliff, wondering if they should go after him but unwilling to go against the elder’s word. It’s not as if they could catch up with him either. They had no choice but to wait until he returned and hope that one of the elders didn’t swing by. Morro frowned as he too became anxious. In that direction was the island the ninja had absolutely insisted no-dragon goes to, as it was quite literally dark in nature. They bore the risk of becoming corrupted if they come in contact with its natural pools of dark matter or remain in its airspace for long, as it is also in its air- though in trace amounts.

It reminded Morro of the corruption pools in the Cursed Plains of Nindrago. He was lucky enough to never come close to them, as he was naturally of the pools of darkly glowing substances. But he’s seen what happened to animals who had. They became wild and destructive, seeking to destroy everything in sight. More often than not, Morro himself had to take them out while he could, else he ran the risk of being killed. He hadn’t the size nor the intimidation of a normally sized dragon so he had to develop skill. One such skill he discovered, was something only he knew and was most effective with taking out predators that came after him. He had the ability to quite literally steal the air from his target’s lungs and have them suffocate to death. It was morbid… But it was his most effective tool out there… And as long as his hunger wasn’t too great to critically affect his strength, it was a guaranteed means of taking down prey in the off chance he manages to find some.

Morro squeezed his eyes shut against the memories of the past then focused on the horizon, waiting, hoping for the leader of speed’s safe return. It was his fault he had to go through what he had. He had no-one to blame but himself. He blinked then turned towards the sound of very familiar wingbeats approaching. Oh no. That was his father. He must have been searching for him, as he broke away from he and the others some time ago. He looked back to the horizon, spotting the leader of speed also returning then. He’ll be seen by his father and he’d be in trouble. Dragons rarely needed to be punished, as they were peaceful beings. A scolding from his father and uncle was rather effective as well. But for the very few that dared to go against the most important rules the elders had put in place, their punishment was harsh. He wasn’t there for it but he heard a little after he had left the Mountain, a dragon had killed another dragon over a potential mate. Their powers were stripped by his uncle, their wings taken and they were banished to a distant island with no hopes of ever leaving. Considering the state of their world now, no doubt those who had been banished are…

‘Griffin.’ The disappointed rumble of his father snapped him out of his thoughts and he blinked down at the scene below, his father looking down at the speed dragon as he landed, his head hung low, knowing he was in serious trouble, his friends looking at him sympathetically. ‘Have you anything to say for yourself?’ He asked the speed dragon and Morro shifted anxiously.

‘I dared him to do it.’ Morro spoke up and all eyes turned to him, his father glancing at him, his head just barely brushing the canopy of treetops.

He could tell that his father didn’t believe him for even one moment.

‘... Is this true?’ He asked Griffin, looking down at him again and Griffin met Morro’s eyes, confusion in them.

Morro only nodded, letting him know he can take the blame for this. It wasn’t as far fetched as it seemed and they were still rather uncomfortable with him still. Anyone would believe he really did goad him to do so without another thought. Griffin looked away from him and back up at the elder Wu, swallowing as he thought of what to do, what to say. He didn’t get why his son was willing to take the fall for his stupid, rash decision… He shook his head.

‘No. It’s not true.’ He spoke up. ‘I went out there on my own. No-one told me to. The others tried to stop me but I didn’t listen.’ He says, gesturing a white wing to them, the underside and edges baring red.

‘I’ll accept my punishment.’ He rumbled low, hanging his head lower and Wu looked him over.

‘... You will remain in the tower for the rest of today and all of tomorrow to reflect on what you’ve done.’ Wu told him and Griffin blinked, surprised by the rather light sentencing.

He wasn’t about to complain however. 

‘Yes, of course. My apologies.’ He spoke formally before flying off, the other dragons following after him.

“That was noble of you, Morro.” Wu murmured, turning to him and Morro shrugged then flew out of the tree.

“He had some strong points… I wish he had gone to either you or uncle about it though.” Morro told him, nuzzling him lightly.

“What were they?” Wu asked as he settled to lay on his stomach, Morro landing before him and doing the same, preparing himself for a lengthy discussion.

“Well…”

________

“Man it’s hard to find a nice, sunny clearing out here.” Blaze mumbled as he laid on his back in a clearing they had to make by carefully removing a few branches from the trees, not wanting to cut them down.

“Yeah but this works nicely.” Rocky mumbled lazily nearby, the warmth of the sun making him sleepy.

“Agreed…” Wisp hummed, also on his back, his tail flicking back and forth.

“Lloydie’s not back yet?” Shard asked as he lifted his head, blue eyes surveying the area.

“He said he’d be back by now…” Mist says with a troubled expression.

“You guys worry too much.” Lloydie huffed as he walked into the clearing then. “I just grabbed an extra bite is all.” He says as an explanation then shook the remaining drops of water off of himself before he walked over into the clearing and flopped down in an available spot.

“Oh that’s right. You’ll be just as big as your dad one day. You’ll need all the meals you can get.” Rocky murmured as he glanced at him.

“I don’t know about that… My dad and uncle are still growing. I doubt I’ll catch up to them any time soon.” Lloyd shrugged with his wings, leaving them open to take in even more of the sun’s warmth.

“Well, if the First Dragon created the Mountain of a Million Heights hollow so he could use it as a resting place, certainly they have much growing to do to get anywhere close to that size scale.” Shard pointed out.

“Hey, when you get to that size Lloydie, can I use your back as Nindrago’s largest water slide when it rains?” Wisp asked as he lifted his head and Lloydie snorted.

“Sure. Whatever you say.” Lloydie says, amused and they all laughed.

____

Garmadad figured that Krux and Acronix still held at least some remnants of their memories if their reactions to both he and his brother was anything to go by. He sighed as he held a wing up, Acronix hanging off of the edge by his teeth sunk into it, his large, reflective eyes innocent, despite him clearly being caught in the act. He set his wing down low and carefully nudged him off before doing the same for Krux who was gnawing at the flat tip of his tail. The second they woke up and realised they were alone with him, it’s been a competition of who can cause him the most pain it seems. While dragons had rather tough and durable scales, past those scales is rather sensitive skin. Their small, sharp teeth are just perfect to work between his scales to get to said skin. But he wouldn’t wrong them. They were more fortunate than many. They had a second chance, even if they didn’t want to. Their slate has been cleaned and they will grow to understand the difference between right and wrong, understand that power and control wasn’t everything… And once they do understand, their powers will be returned.

So for now, he will give them the benefit of the doubt, would mark this off as hatchlings teething. He laid down, unphased once they immediately began climbing his snout like the mountain he was sure he was to them. Krux was the one who got to the top of his snout first. He watched as he looked for his brother before he wandered over to the other side to see him climbing still. He gave high chitters, encouraging his tiring brother to keep going as he paced around the edge of his snout. Once Acronix finally made it to the top, they both nuzzled each other, excitedly, chirping as they did. Garmadad held back a huff. They still had that strong connection with each other and that was good. Brothers should always stick together… ________

“I’d say that went well.” Kai smiled as they headed towards the Bounty.

“Kai, you literally tried to fry half the population of the press there.” Lloyd says dryly.

“But I didn't.” Kai pointed out proudly. “Plus those jerks deserved it.” He grinned, tail flicking back and forth.

“He has a point there. One of them outright implied you’d ssomehow end up like your dad.” Jay pointed out.

“But you didn’t have to tase him Jay.” Lloyd protested.

“Oh I didn’t. Tempest did.” Jay clarified. “I didn’t stop him but still.” He added with a grin.

“He looked like he was gonna attack you so it was either Jay tasing him or a broken nose and missing teeth.” Nya says as she cracked her knuckles.

“The media would not have taken well to that.” Pixal reminded her.

“Screw the media. We save Ninjago countless times. You’d think they’d have some faith in us by now.” Cole huffed, crossing his arms.

“I think that is the reason why some still doubt us. After all, Ninjago is almost constantly under attack. Harumi proved that an attack can come from the most unexpected of people. It’s best for us to not dwell on those few however. The majority of Ninjago appreciate and accept us as we are after all.” Zane advised.

“Zane makes a solid point.” Kai nodded then grinned. “I bet the dragons will be stoked to be able to fly anywhere in Ninjago they’d like. Let’s go deliver the good news!” He yelled then spread his wings and flew off, landing on the Bounty up ahead.

“You heard him.” Jay grinned, unfolding his wings and taking off as well, Cole, Lloyd and Zane following up.

“I’ve got you Pix.” Nya huffed, tucking her hands under her arms and Pixal made a sound of surprise once she was lifted off the ground, Nya beating her wings a little harder to carry her over to the Bounty. “That was a work out.” She admits as she set Pixal down then smirked.

“Mind if I add carrying you around while flying to my workout routine?” Nya asked her.

“Certainly. It also broadens my understanding of your aerodynamics.” She agreed as Kai started up the ship.

“Next stop: Dragon’s Labyrinth!”

__________

“Dad, you’re watching them?” Lloydie asked, a little confused as his father herded the twin hatchling dragons with his tail.

“Yes. The ninja had to have a meeting.” Garmadon says in explanation, not even flinching when they both sunk their teeth into his tail, used to it now.

“You uh… Need some help there?” Cole asked, eyeing the two gnawing at his tail like a toy squeak.

No. Squeak toy. Squeak-e toy? Yeah that’s it.

“It… Would be appreciated.” He admits and Cole huffed as he walked over, plucking Acronix then Krux off his tail, picking Acronix up with the tip of his tail as he padded away, setting them down a safe distance from the elder and tucking them under his wing. Earth dragons had a natural affinity in caring for hatchlings, as eggs are always hatched on rock or soil as Dragons didn’t nest like birds.

“What’s going on here?” Morro asked once he and his father returned.

“Brother, there is much to discuss.” Wu says as he walked over to the dark dragon.

“Certainly.” Garmadon says as he straightened up.

All of their attention turned towards the exit facing the front of the labyrinth once they heard the familiar sound of rocket boosters, spotting the flying ship that belonged to the ninja as it arrived and lowered to land, Kai heading their way.

“Kai! Hey!” Lloydie greeted, walking over to nuzzle him.

“Lloydie!” Kai laughed nuzzling him back as they both purred. “I have big news!” He told them with a grin and the dragons all shared a look.

“Lay it on us.” Blaze says as he walked over, eager to hear.

“So Hiroshi’s Labyrinth is great and all but we get that you guys are dragons and this small area might be good for a temporary home, but not so much to properly stretch your wings.” Kai began, Wu and Morro sharing a look, the larger being impressed and the smaller being surprised. “So we gave Ninjago a heads up about you guys being here so they won’t freak out, which means that you guys can fly out beyond this little patch of forest without worry!” He grinned at them and the dragons looked at him in awe- then excitement.

They had barely seen much of their world. They were indeed curious to explore.

“You’ve told them?” Jay asked as he and the others flew in a moment after, Pixal yet again in awe at the colossal size of their elders.

“Yeah, they seem pretty stoked.” Kai grinned, looking up at the bright eyed dragons.

“It’s important to remember however, that while your free range has broadened, Vortica’s influence hasn’t. Long periods of time outside of the labyrinth is not recommended or else dragons will begin to turn human.” Zane reminded them. “We aren’t able to return to your world to reverse the effects so every dragon should be careful when they decide to fly outside of the labyrinth. The Dark Island is still off limits as well.” He told them and the elders nodded.

“We are aware. We will all e()nsure each and every dragon’s time outside the labyrinth is monitored carefully. But I am certain they will be ecstatic all the same to hear the news.” Wu told them lightly.

“... You really are amazing…” Morro says in awe, looking directly at Kai who blinked then flushed a bit at the surprise compliment.

“It wasn’t all me though. It was everyone.” He shrugged, bashful.

“Yeah but you’re the one who pointed that out to begin with. If you hadn’t we would have never considered this.” Jay spoke up then blinked at a familiar chitter- just before he was ran into by an excited hatchling, landing hard on the ground with a grunt.

“Glad to see you too, bud.” Jay laughed breathlessly as Nix nuzzled him excitedly, his tail flicking back and forth eagerly.

“Looks like you’ve got a fan.” Cole huffed, pulling Nix back enough so he could sit up and hug the baby dragon properly.

“Lookss like it.” Jay chuckled, stroking the spiny bumps on his back.

“So what’s the rest of Ninjago like?” Lloydie asked Kai and he grinned.

“It’s mostly desert but…”

___________________

(Sorry for the late update! I've been busy over the past couple days and also trying to flip my sleep schedule from sleep all day awake all night- yet again. But tada! Longer chappie! Next update will be time skip and some more plot! Thanks for reading!)

[nam-nam-joon]

comfortable

Pairing: taehyung x reader

Genre: fluff

Wordcount: 2.4k

Warnings: cuddling, otherwise none~

Summary: you initially go over to polish the balcony of your neighbour, who then invites you to stay for lunch - and a nap afterwards

The sun had climbed high enough in the sky to fully shine its light on the tiny balcony you currently occupied, surrounded by pots, flowers both dead and barely alive. Accompanied by a small shovel and a sack of soil you’d spent the last hours trying to save what could be saved concerning the plants that had sat the winter long in the pots hanging on your neighbour’s handrail; receiving nothing but a thin sheet of snow and the unrelenting pecks of birds.

The stack of newspapers under your shins served as a pillow against the cold floor, and you took a moment to shuffle around to sit back on it more comfortably.

Taehyung had put cheap bamboo wrapping around the metal bars running around the edges of the little outside space and it provided a great shield against the, admittedly, still freezing breeze. It was nearing April now and the wind had yet to change from biting cheeks to caressing the little flowers peeking their heads out from the ground. You, however, were currently comfortably warm bathed in the bright light.

Several bones popped as you stretched your back out.

Dirt collected under your fingernails and in the creases of your hands.

You didn’t really bother wiping them clean, not just yet. There was still a weak little bush of lavender needing assistance; but before you could reach for were it currently lay between the repotted catnip and fuchsia, the glass door in your back opened.

The smell of something delicious wafted outside together with a gush of heated air.

Taeyhung’s head peeked out and down on you, a grin stealing on his features as he observed you lazily blinking up at him.

“Remind me again which of us is the cat?” He asked, amused. You chuckled and stretched your legs.

“It’s really nice out here. Warm, sunny… very pleasant. Also, fresh air. You should try it sometime, does wonders for your body.”

He wrinkled his nose in fake disgust before his face momentarily vanished back inside.

Moments later it popped out again, together with the rest of him.

In his hands were two glasses of juice, one of which he graciously extended toward you.

You accepted with a word of thanks and took a sip.

“You’re almost done?” He noted after a moment of quiet; intelligent eyes running over the mess you made on his tiles. You nodded.

“Yup. Sorted out everything that was beyond saving and put it in that basket over there, everything else is in these pots here. Only gotta put your lavender back now. When it gets warmer you can go out and shop for replacements for your… whatever that stuff with the long little branches and loads of dead little leafs was.”

He leaned back against the closed door and nodded, gaze still taking in the shrubbery while his tail softly swished back and forth behind him.

It flicked abruptly, just before he opened his mouth.

“Do you want to stay for lunch? I made noodles and soup, and there’s some leftover from the take-away BBQ I had yesterday evening. More than enough for two.”

You finished your juice and leaned forward to place the empty glass on the railing to the side. Taehyung’s eyes followed your movement and his left arm, with its hand stuck into his pants’ pocket, twitched.

He ignored the amused raise of your eyebrow and his ears turned backwards.

“Is that a thank-you for saving your greenery?”

His hand, half on the way to the glass, changed course and came up to rub his neck as his eyes finally met your gaze again.

“If you want to? Although you’re probably doing only yourself a favour here; I can’t say I care that much about them…”

“Evidently.” You tsked, soothing the harsh comment with an easy smile. “Nah, my pleasure. And yes, I’d love to grab a bite. Got some work done?”

He seemed to pause briefly before finally picking up your empty glass. “I- Yeah. It’s still way too many files to look through and write emails, but- It’s less now.”

“Some nice people with the applications?”

His strong eyebrows creased the skin between them.

“A few. Most of them don’t immediately fall out, but it’s the other documents you have to really look out for if you want to weed out those who don’t, y’know, really want to help.”

You nodded in understanding and turned back to the helpless lavender still lying on the floor.

Taehyung lingered a while longer but then returned back inside with a swish of his tail, leaving you to his pots once more.

He kept quiet during your lunch, after you’d scrubbed your hands clean and brushed a few stray leafs out of your hair.

“Everything alright?” You asked, after both of you had picked up your spoons and started eating a few mouthfuls.

He chewed on a piece of vegetable and stared into the foggy liquid for a while. When he lifted his head and his tawny eyes found yours you noticed how worn out he looked.

The shaded rings around his eyes and the slightly matted hair hadn’t been noticeable in the bright sunlight.

“Tae?”

“-Yes.” He hurried to answer, hiding a yawn behind his palm. “Yeah, I’m just- just tired.”

He shot you a quick, unconvincing upturn of his lip’s corners before picking his bowl up again and continue eating.

“Maybe you should take the afternoon off. Have some rest.”

As soon as the words had left your lips you saw the shift in his face, the hardening of the muscles around his jaw.

“I can’t. We have so many young ones in the shelter at the moment - we can’t afford- I can’t afford to keep them waiting for too long. They need good families, as soon as possible.”

“Okay.” Your voice was deliberately soft after his outburst. He sighed and avoided looking you, and so you reached out with your right to cover his left hand gently.

His fingers twitched but he didn’t pull away.

The tension in his shoulders eased somewhat, up until the point that his ears rose from where they had flattened to his scalp as his gaze slowly rose to yours.

“If I can help in any way - please let me know. Okay? I’m always here, just across the hall.”

A tired, but this time genuine, smile, stole on his face as he tilted his head and gave you a long look.

“I know. Thank you. You’re an awesome neighbour.”

You grinned.

“I sure hope so. Otherwise it’d be a shame if some of your new pots would magically find themselves on the terrace three stories down, hmm?”

One of his eyebrows quirked up.

“Are you insinuating you’d - you’d push them over the edge?” His eyes narrowed. “Not funny.”

The boxy smile contradicted the serious tone of his voice greatly and you laughed.

Without him needing to ask, you picked up the dishtowel and began to dry the bowls that he placed dripping wet on the little rack.

The small smile he send in thanks warmed your insides.

Now and then you could hear a faint tune from the radio in the next room, playing calm pop music. Even the street below his kitchen window was almost devoid of cars passing by; only the occasional couple or warmly wrapped individual sauntering past.

You felt his presence on your right as he joined you standing next to the window, looking down.

The warmth on his face as he took in yours made you smile.

He opened his mouth, caught sight of something on the upper right part of your hair, and paused.

There was a quick glance of his pointy canines as he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, biting down on it before seeming to overcome the struggle taking place inside.

“Do you- Would you mind, uh- You wanna stay for a nap?”

The shyness was new, but you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t somewhat endearing.

Work must have really worn him down.

"Sure. The couch?"

Visibly relieved by your positive reaction, the cat hybrid’s tail flicked as he turned towards the living room.

“I would take the bed, usually, but with the sun… we could place the cushions on the floor and? With, with a blanket?”

You inclined your head with a small smile. “Works for me.”

The cushions turned out to be a lot smaller for two people than expected, but after you’d given Taehyung your Okay that you didn’t mind body contact he wrapped his limbs around you, pulled himself almost completely on top of you.

After a bit of shuffling he finally rested his head next to yours, one of his arms lying across your upper chest, one leg hooked around yours.

“Want me to pet your hair?”

The quiet "Yes" almost escaped your ears.

You felt the small shiver running through him at your words and suppressed a smile. Your neighbour of the past year was more like a cat than he liked to admit, sometimes.

It took you a moment to find out where he liked your fingers rubbing soothing circles into his hair the most, lightly scratching the base of his ears, and carding through the locks at the nape of his neck, to getting him to fully relax.

The thin tail snaking around your upper thigh was the first sign you did something right, before Taehyung drifted off far enough to no longer care if he purred or not.

Day to day you hardly ever saw him embracing the animal side of him, whether it be curling his lips over his teeth but refraining to hiss when a car drove through a puddle near him and splattered him with muddy water, nor purring in comfortable situations. Or at all.

Now, you held your breath, fingers pressing down on the spot above where his ears would have been, had they been human.

The sound was minimal at first, started as a soft rumble deep down in his chest. Under your administrations it rose to a steady vibration that travelled through his body into yours, the spot where his chin met your shoulder almost tingling.

He sighed and adjusted his position, hand tightening on your side, pulling you further into him. The leg on top of yours stretched minimally before settling back into its place, his hips rolling forward once without any determination behind it.

The steady rise and fall of his purring, together with the warmth of his body and the blanket on top of you lulled you in.

The sunbeams streaming through the windows bathed your little pile into an island of light, the walls and rest of the room slinking back in shadow.

You risked a glance sideways.

Taehyung was so beautiful.

His lashes fanned over his cheekbones, his lips slightly parted for breathing.

He must have forgone shaving this morning; you could see the thick stubbles of his whiskers dotting the skin next to his nostrils as well as the thinner ones of his would-be human scruff peppering his upper lip and over his chin.

Something tugged softly on your heart.

Your hand dropped from his hair to his cheek, caressing the soft skin there.

He licked over his lips and tucked his head in, rubbing his cheek against your touch in his sleep.

“Get some rest, Tae-Tae. You deserve it.”

You whispered, foreheads only parted by an inch.

“As long as you don’t go anywhere.”

His voice was thick, words slurred by sleep, and you doubted he was fully awake.

Nonetheless did it surprise you; the absence of his purring making the room sound weirdly quiet all of a sudden.

“I won’t.” And you picked up carding his hair again, Taehyung slipping back into a deeper slumber. When his purring resumed you felt heavy, deciding to give into sleep as well.

You blinked your eyes open an indefinite amount of time later.

The world was warm and you felt pleasantly heavy.

Upon attempting to move you found Taeyhung had now completely made himself comfortable on top of you. His face rested in the crook of your neck, breath hot and a bit wet against your skin, while his left hand held onto the pillow under your head next to your face.

“Taehyung.”

You placed a hand on his side, feeling the resistance of his last rib and then the firm softness of his waist below.

He grumbled in response.

“Shouldn’t we get up?”

He groaned, pressing down on you and adjusting into a more comfortable position, as if that would be answer enough.

“Hey.”

You gently rocked him from side to side, all the movement you could muster at this point.

“Do you have any idea how distracting you look, sitting out there, taking care of my stuff and potting my plants?”

His voice was raspy and deep, muffled by both your pullover covering your shoulder and the blanket.

“No.” You answered truthfully, fingernails running over his scalp once more.

He groaned in satisfaction.

Then he lifted his head, as if remembering your position, your person.

The purr building in the back of his throat died down.

He blinked.

“And your pets are criminally good.” He narrowed his eyes. “Have you been practicing on a hybrid I don’t know about?”

You grinned at the suspicious look on his face.

“I swear, I’ve been true and faithful. You are my one and only.”

His ears turned back and the apples of his cheeks slightly deepened in colour.

You laughed out loud, as best as you could with his considerable weight on your chest.

“Okay Kitkat, off now. I really need to use the bathroom. Don’t you have work to do, too?”

With a begrudging sigh he gave you free, sheepishly blinking at you with half his face buried in your pillow.

The end of a grin was visible on his lips.

“‘Kitkat’?” He repeated, voice caught somewhere between an amused snort and touched.

You knelt next to the pile, studying his face before he rolled on his back, taking the blanket with him and pulling it over his face until all that was visible were his eyes.

“You don’t like it?”

“No, I… I do. I do.”

“Then yes. Kitkat.”

As you left the room you could hear Taeyhung mumbling the nickname to himself.

leave a comment or like if you enjoyed reading this ^-^

[cannedsaladsoup]

Answer All the Ship things for Chili's

sisjxjdjsksjdkkajzkdbd oh boy long post then

1. How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals? Golan takes the first night watch every other day so it's not too uncommon for Enya to fall asleep before he gets into bed. He does his best to not wake her up but in the winter he warms up by the fire first so he doesn't wake her up with cold hands/feet.

Golan's the first to wake up as well so he wakes her up whenever he does. Enya usually stays in bed for a bit and on rare occasions Golan picks her up and tosses her outside to get her outside.

2. How's their teamwork? Do they share well? They're a pretty good team together and never really have issues, however they have a tough time working in cramped areas since they both are trying but Enya's trying to get something behind Golan but Golan accidentally runs her over because she's always below his line of sight and who decided to put Golan of all people here--

They share pretty much everything in the first place aside clothing, but Enya steals Golan's shirts anyways and he tried stealing her stuff to get her back but her shirts cant fit past his shoulders and it just looks ridiculous.

3. Are they open about their relationship? How do they feel about PDA? They weren't open about their relationship when it started but also didn't keep it a secret, like if someone asked they wouldn't hide it. Once they got married their relationship was very out there bc duh there was a wedding man.

Their PDA is usually just like a kiss or two at the most, but it's not unusual to find them sitting/laying together in the grass if they've got nothing to do that day. Enya's probably putting flowers in Golan's hair while he's napping.

4. First impressions? Love at first sight? They met when Golan came in to get an wound treated and Enya (who treated him) saw him n her first impression was just "oh another dumbass who's not gonna follow my orders,,," and she was kinda right but surprisingly enough he listened to her, but only her according to the other nurses who've seen him before. She didn't fall for him at once but she slowly sank down without noticing until one day she realized her feelings.

Golan had a lot of respect for her since she didn't put up with his shit n basically was just "try working before your healed and i'll tie you down to that cot so help me--" He pretty much fell hard for her like the dork he his

5. Nicknames? Pet names? In-jokes? Enya's his little kitty cat because her snoring sounds like a cat purring. She hates it and calls him a thunderstorm to poke back at him.

They also joke about the dwarf taking down the giant.

6. Any tasks left to one person? Golan's in charge of grabbing things too high up and Enya's in charge of getting into hard to reach spots.

7. What annoys them the most abt their partner? What would they change if they could? Enya gets pretty annoyed when Golan just never talks about what's bothering him and wishes she could make him more open about it. Meanwhile Golan kinda wishes Enya wouldn't bug him about everything that's on his mind but he knows she means well and doesn't want her to change.

8. What do they like best about their partner? Enya appreciates that she's with a giant bed warmer and someone who can safely get her the top shelf things, but she loves his compassion and humility.

Golan adores Enya's ambitions and just the motivation she gives him just by being around, he also thinks her fluffy hair is adorable and would play with it all day if he could.

9. Do they discuss big issues? Religion? Marriage? Children? Death? They have obviously discussed marriage and were both on board with it but they had a disagreement on children for a good year or two. Enya really wanted kids but the idea of kids scared Golan bc of some past traumas (weirdly enough killing a child does that to u) but Enya ended up pregnant anyways and Golan was soon on the yes kids side.

10. Who Drives? Cooks? Does the handiwork? Cleans? Pays bills? Handles the public? Well since this is a medfant setting and they're both essentially hermits, driving and bills are out of the question, but if it were a modern au then Golan usually drives and does financing.

They both work together on cooking, Enya often does smaller type handiwork like sewing while Golan does bigger things like moving stuff, and Enya handles the social things since Golan's a complete dork.

11. Do they celebrate holidays/anniversaries?Not really since they don't keep track of the exact dates of things but they do celebrate their wedding anniversary around mid to late spring.

12. Is there a wedding? What was the proposal like? Honeymoon? WEDDING IS A DEF YES THO and i still wanna draw something for it but lazie. Anyways getting married was something they talked abt before as like "yeah i'd marry u probably" but nothing official, so Golan popped the question one day when they were gathering wood together and Enya was caught completely off-guard n was just ????????????? for a solid minute before saying yes

As for their honeymoon they just stayed on a mountain top together for a few days and enjoyed the serenity, nothing all that fancy.

ok ive spent like an hour on this alone i give up q3q

[writing-parker]

A Series of Vignettes- Bucky Barnes

Summary: A series of episodes and events in the reader’s and Bucky’s relationship. Big and small, sweet or angsty, these stories lay out the moments in time they carved out for themselves in the crazy world they live in. They all take place in the same universe, but do not need to be read in any particular order.

Warnings: Some of these stories touch on topics including: PTSD, mentions of violence, suicide, death, drugs, alcohol, strong language, and smut. Each vignette has its own warnings.

A/N: So, i so a prompt that said “You’re laying on your lovers chest and their heartbeat speeds up” and this is what came of it. Also, dogs. Lots of fluff. enjoy/ 

Let me know if you would like to be tagged.

A Night in Brooklyn | Beautiful World | Johannesburg

It’s nearly noon, and you’re still in bed. The two of you weren’t normally the type to waste a perfectly good day tangled under the covers, but the cold November air was unforgiving when, earlier this morning, you went to your bodega for coffee and bagels.

“No more ‘outside’ today.” You grumbled to Bucky when you were safely back in your shared loft. “Too cold.”

Bucky’s smile turned into a laugh when he pressed his cold fingers to your neck.

“Stop!” You yelped, squirming away from him.

His arms circle you, not letting you go anywhere, “No more ‘outside’.” He promised.

It was the first really cold day of the year, temperatures nearly dipping below freezing. You spent all summer complaining about the NYC heat, but now that winter was closing in you missed the hot, heavy air.

You hooked your leg over Bucky’s hips, head on his chest, while you scrolled through Netflix titles. “Have I made you watch Cheers yet?” You ask.

Bucky stares out the large windows that your bed is pressed up against. “Don’t really feel like starting something new,” he looks down at you for a moment, one hand coming up to card his fingers through his hair.

“Mmm,” You hum, pressing your face into his chest further and dropping the Apple TV remote, abandoning the thought of television. Bucky’s gaze returns to the streets below you. The large windows that covered nearly every wall in your loft have quickly became his favorite part of your apartment.

Looking for apartments with Bucky had been difficult. Not because he was so picky, but the exact opposite. Where did he want to live? I don’t care, you pick. How many bedrooms? Does it matter? A brownstone or an apartment or a loft? I’m happy if you are.

So, that’s how the two of you ended up in a large loft in Williamsburg, looking over McCarren Park. The space was huge and open, the only walls being the ones that separated the bedroom and bathrooms from the rest of the space. Floor to ceiling windows nearly covered every wall, letting so much light in that you rarely ever had to use the artificial kind.

“It’s huge.” Bucky had said when you guys toured the place, “But, doll, there’s no walls.”

“Nuh-uh.” You said, grabbing his hand and pulling him to the French doors that led to the bedroom, “Look. Doors and walls for the bedroom and bathrooms. And besides, it’s a loft- that’s kinda the point. And it’s right by the train. And Steve’s. And the park. And-”

Bucky cuts you off with a kiss, “You really like it?”

“I love it.” You tell him giddily.

The next day you were signing your first lease together.

Bucky subconsciously pulled you closer to him, your warm body chasing away the chill of the day. He would be content to never get out of bed on the weekends, but you were an early riser, dragging him to brunches and museums and the parks you liked to spend your days in. Not that he would ever complain. He enjoyed that time, too.

And besides, he would follow you to hell and back. All you had to do was hold out your hand for him to take.

You scroll through Instagram and Twitter, listening to the sound of Bucky’s steady heartbeat under your ears. Eventually, your phone falls to the side and you feel yourself being lulled to sleep as his fingers play with your hair absentmindedly.

You’re barely conscious when you hear the speed of Bucky’s heartbeat increase rapidly. You look up at him, concerned, only to find him gazing out of the window peacefully.

“Buck?” You tug at his shirt a little.

“Hmm?” He hums, his gaze not leaving the street below.

“Your heart just got all fast… what are you looking at?” You push yourself up on his chest a little.

“What? I…nothing- just… look at those dogs.” Bucky forces out eventually, cheeks a little red.

You sit up to peer over him and it takes everything in you not to laugh out loud. In the park below your window, an elderly woman pushes a stroller holding two French Bulldogs in matching sweaters. You press your lips together and look at him, eyes wide, smile playing at the corners of your mouth.

“Don’t laugh at me.” He grumbles as he pulls you on top of him and buries his head in your neck. “They’re cute.”

One of your hands comes up to tease the hairs at the nape of Bucky’s neck and you can’t help the loud laugh that escape your lips when you think of his endearing response to seeing the small, well-dressed pups.

“Big ole softie, is all you are.” Is all you say, tugging on his hair a little to get him to look at you. He nuzzles his face further into your neck.

“Y/n,” Bucky whines, drawing out the syllables of your name.

“Don’t worry. I won’t tell the guys.” You tease.

Before you know what’s happening, both of Bucky’s hands are tightening around your waist, and he’s flipped you both so he’s hovering over you, tickling your sides.

“Stop!” You shriek with laughter.

With a conniving laugh of his own, Bucky pushes you further into the mattress, fingers unrelenting, “Bucky! Oh my god, stop, I’m gonna pee!” You kick at him, and eventually he collapses on top of you with an over-dramatic sigh, always careful to not put his full weight on you.

You push him up and he flops down beside you, pulling you back to his chest. Settling back in, you feel your eyelids start to grow heavy, and you nuzzle into your boyfriend for an afternoon nap.

“Baby?” Bucky asks quietly.

“Mmm?”

“Let’s get a dog.”

Tags: @liamakorn @acupofhotlatte @captainmommaoftwogirls @reallyconfusednowpt2 @stressedasalways @swtmckngbrd @emmiejames

[exit-paradise]

Russia: An Introvert’s Paradise

Being an introverted American in Russia is great because no one really wants to talk to you.

My trip to Russia in February of 2018 started the way all my trips start. With tons of research, planning and maybe too much thought put into packing.

What follows below is a picture of all the items I took with me, with convenient red no-no's over the things I didn't use (5 things). I can accept one or two, but this was too many.

The reason some of these things didn't get used is that the giant coat with the fur trimmed hood (center right) was TOO MUCH COAT!!

I bought it a few weeks before the trip when I saw that temperatures in Irkutsk and Krasnoyatsk were in the -30 to -40 range. (C or F, you ask? It doesn't matter. That is sudden death cold either way).

But when I did get there the temp has warmed to -5 F (-20 C).

So this coat was Overkill. Especially in Moscow where it was +20 F (-6 C), and I had the hood off and coat unzipped wide open like a madman.

Sorry for the Potato quality images of the Kremlin. Imagine this but crisp and vibrant. Moscow in winter is probably better than any other time because of all the holiday decorations.

I spent a few days in Moscow before I headed off to Siberia for the dogsledding trip, and let me tell you, Moscow is amazing.

Now, if you’re like me and grew up in the 80′s, your idea of Russia is probably a drab, blocky, communist dump. But it’s absolutely gorgeous, so I spent a lot of time just walking around, hitting Red Square, the Kremlin, Moscow State University, Gorky Park, and the UNESCO listed Church of the Ascension.

Church of the Ascension, Moscow. Built in 1532 to commemorate the birth of who would later become Ivan the Terrible.

I wasn’t as adventurous for food in Moscow as I should have been. Fortunately there are quite a few cafeteria style restaurants that were much less socially precarious than a traditional restaurant where you have to talk to a waiter. The old Soviet throwback cafeterias were a special lil treat.

After my time Moscow, I headed back to the Airport to catch a red eye to Irkutsk, a 5 hour flight.

Irkutsk is full of old wooden buildings. I am not sure how anyone could stay warm in there in the -5 F degree weather.

In Irkutsk, I had my biggest issues and awkward moments of the trip.

I ventured to a real restaurant, where the staff didn’t speak English and neither did the menu.  I recognized Borsht, so I ordered that as a starter. Then I just pointed to something on the Menu in the Entree section. What arrived was another bowl of soup. I mean, it was basically a goat leg boiled in broth, but yeah, I had two soups for a meal.

I could not get my ATM card to work anywhere. I tried at least 15 ATMs. Fortunately the Sled Dog trip would accept PayPal. But it was a tense few hours there where I thought I had traveled 13 time zones just to fail because of US sanctions against Russia.

Sled dogs are super friendly.

At the helm of the sled on the frozen Lake Baikal. These 8 dogs carried 3 people and some bags.

The dog sledding trip was just about the best I could have hoped for. It wasn’t too cold (only -5F), and for my first time, only 4-5 hours on sled per day was just about right. There were 2 other americans and A kiwi on the trip, and all of us enjoyed the overnight in the cabin complete with traditional Russian Banya experience.

A Russian banya works like this: you strip naked and enter a warm, wet antechamber. Here there are shallow pans and ladles on the wall, some felt hats, a barrel of cold water and a spigot coming from the furnace with scalding hot water. Not knowing what to do, one of the more traveled of your companions assumes it's like a Japanese bath where you are to rinse off before entering the sauna room.

Hearing the spashing water, an old Russian man comes in fully clothed and frantically tries to explain to you what to do.

After a few tense moments, you learn this: get some hot water from the spigot into the pan, add a ladle of cold water. Put on a felt hat and take your warm water into the sauna room. There is a rock embedded in the furnace. Throw tiny amounts of water with the ladle on it until you are about to die. Return to the antechamber and cool off with cold or warm water from the barrel and spigot. Repeat until dead.

The next morning it was back to Irkutsk for another uneventful night before I caught the Trans-Siberian to Krasnoyarsk.

Now boarding on platform 4, Train #1 from Vladivostok to Moscow, but I was only doing 8 hours from Irkutsk to Krasnoyarsk.

I took a pretty big gamble for my Trans-Siberian mini-adventure and booked a 3rd class sleeper. If you don’t know what that is, it is basically a train car filled with beds. I thoroughly enjoyed it in retrospect, but let me tell you all the ways I messed it up.

I picked the worst berth. On one side of the Aisle, there are 4 beds (2 sets of bunk beds facing a table) that are perpendicular to the aisle, like so =|. On the other side, the cheapest bunks, are parallel to the aisle, like so ||. And I chose the upper bunk. During the day the lower bunk folds up to reveal two seats and a table. At bedtime, the bed folds down and the table and chairs goes away. If you’re on the top bunk, you’ve nowhere to sit or put anything, and very little head room. So when the babuska in the lower bunk decided 9pm was a good bedtime (and really, at night there’s nothing to see or do anyway), the only place to go was lay down in my upper bunk.

I might have been in the wrong car. I was supposed to be in car 16, and I was sure it said 16 on the outside, but a display screen at the ends of the car said 18. So I spent a good deal of time being terrified that someone would get on the train and make me move.

When travel guides recommend you bring flip flops or a good pair of slippers, you better do what they say. I had a thin pair that I’d gotten from the Transatlantic flight, and it was not enough to save my feet from the sludge on the floor of the bathroom.

When the Russian gentleman invites you to sit on his bunk because the babushka is sleeping, you take him up on the offer. I refused politely and said I don’t speak Russian. I could have had a great, social moment with a stranger and instead I stood in a super narrow aisle for thirty minutes.

All comfy in 3rd class. Honestly, with a friend or two, this would be a really amazing way to travel.

I got to Krasnoyarsk early in the morning, checked in to my hotel and pretty much just checked out. I was mentally exhausted by this point and so despite being able to see a ski resort across the mighty Yenisei River, I only explored the center city area on foot after a nap.

Krasnoyarsk straddles the Yenisei River, the largest river system that flows into the Arctic ocean.

That was it for Russia. 3 flights, 13 time zones, 7500 miles, and 16 hours later I was home.

[lithium-lossr]

It’s been a while since I’ve posted but mostly because after the appointments I was exhausted for days on end and all energy accumulated was spent on my toddler. Finally though, after a long nap, I have mustered enough energy weeks later to update my little tag for myself before I forget anything.

So here’s an update for myself.

Last I posted was how anxious and frustrated I was with the American healthcare System since, without insurance, 15 years of my life was depending on 30 minutes.

When I went in for that appointment I ended up only having an EKG, not the orthostatic blood pressure I expected. Which is fine, just really shitty when travel time is north of three hours, but my doctor knew their EKG prices are FAR cheaper than my areas so no worries. This appointment was 12/31/19

The nurse on the other hand was rather condescending, I thought. Maybe it’s the autism not catching tones right but i dunno. Felt off. I expressed I knew the EKG procedure since I’ve had several in the past so she didn’t need to walk me through it. She broke terms down for me and I also explained she had no need since I have a strong history in human anatomy but also have had several friends & my own sister being nurses. TYPICALLY I have nurses feel relieved or kinda happy after explaining I don’t need them to baby step me. Normally allowing that knowledge be known opens to some great convos that don’t involved every single step they’re taking. I felt some of her finishing comments about me being a “good little ekg taker since I’ve had so many” basically felt invalidating. I’m sorry I didn’t have you explain the whole process out to me like I’m a newbie. That you didn’t have to remind me 100 times to stop moving or talking. Maybe THATS why you fucked up the wire order and put my calves on my arms & messed up the chest one with another. Because you didn’t talk yourself through it. But hey, who knows. I don’t.

Anyways,

My EKG came back and it showed enough for us to set up and orthostatic bp appointment.

I was unable to find the EKG Results on the portal but I’ve requested them and will be adding them to my tag to keep track of all this.

For my orthostatic bp appointment I thankfully had a much nicer nurse. She had me lay down and did me up with a cuff and finger pulse oximeter. My oxygen was 99% (not to brag or anything *debbie Ryan hair pushback meme* but it’s Rona SZN bb)

I just focused straight up & ahead. Throughout the whole lay, sit, stand transition she asked me questions on how I felt. Just like any day my symptoms were strong and immediately on sitting up my chest felt sharp and tight. Slightly light on my top half. More I had to support myself the worse I felt. Started to realize how much I support myself with walls, chairs, bars, anything to keep me from having to hold my own weight because this sucked. When I stood my heart kept hurting and my body felt light. My legs felt like they were literally draining. Like I honestly feel like I’m in some sort of Stephen King movie with how it felt the blood fall. Feet felt heavy.

The poor nurse sounded so concerned. Several times she asked if I was going to pass out and if I needed to sit then sit but I won’t lie. If it took me passing out I was prepared to because I’m SO TIRED of this debilitating BULLSHIT.

To give better context on results I’m about to drop (to anyone who actually might be reading this and care) on my orthostatic bp I am:

-24 years

-114 lbs (51.7kg)

- 5’7” (170cm)

My results (copy and pasted from the portal)

Orthostatic BP -

123 / 78 supine R arm adult cmchale1 01-12-2021

127 / 95 sitting R arm adult Abnormal cmchale1 01-12-2021

134 / 91 standing R arm adult Abnormal cmchale1 01-12-2021

Conclusion came to yes, it is POTS-

“Dr. R______ has reviewed your nurse visit and states: Her symptoms and vital signs are highly suggestive of POTS, or postural tachycardia syndrome. There are a variety of reasons this can happen, but the most common demographic is young, thin females. Often, nonpharmacologic treatments can be very effective. Specifically, high salt diet, aggressive fluids, and a daily exercise program with cardiovascular training (e.g. interval jogging - let me know if she needs more specifics). Also, doing things to increase venous return (squeezing the leg muscles a couple times) before standing up can be helpful. Sometimes, a beta-blocker like propranolol can be used as needed to help with high heart rates, but should only be used in the context of the behavioral strategies. I'm happy to send some in, if she doesn't get enough relief with the behavioral approaches! Let us know if you have further questions.”

Since dealing with this so long most of these things have already been in place. I’m a r/hydrohomie and even recently updated my bottle to a half gallon hydroJug since my quart was just useless. Always ALWAYS empty. I have a relatively salty diet but will be getting supplements to boost, I just don’t really know what to look at for SALT/sodium tablets. Like, the thought of them existing never crossed my mind until I read about sodium intake. As for working out I won’t lie, I chase a toddler (16m) around all day so I definitely TRY to get a nice workout in but I’m exhausted after them. In Maine we are below freezing temperatures and inside just don’t have much room so I try to hoop or do some palates or something to get my muscles working. I used to be such an avid walker when I lived in town. Even in the winter I’d just walk to the store. But now the closest store is 5 miles away on a busy road in tourist/farm land so needless today it’s isolating for someone who doesn’t drive. Even when the weather is nice I never NEVER HAD TO DEAL WITH T I C K S. Northern Maine doesn’t deal with that. I saw my first tick at 19 years old 50 miles from my hometown. So not even something I had to worry about hiking in the woods up north. But HERE. PEOPLE KEEP A COLLECTION TO SEE HOW MANY THE CATCH EXCUSE ME.

Ugh that’s a tangent and a half but 🤢🤮 ticks

Little fucking paracites.

As for the medication, I’m glad that wasn’t the first thing she pushed on me. I LOVE having a D.O. over an M.D. Idc. If I have a choice I will pick a D.O. EVEYTIME. My goal is to eventually be off all pharms, even if right now it’s only Zoloft. After I stop breastfeeding I’m to add lithium back at a low dose and that’s just so much maintenance. Labs, med management, MORE refills. Adjustments. Sigh.

Adding also for anyone who does actuall read. I KNOW a cardiologist is who can properly diagnose me and help me more effectively than a D.O PCP. My pcp is literally just worried about my heart and that it was ignored so long. She also knows I have no private insurance and her office doesn’t take state. She’s worked with me in the most amazing ways to get me the best care for the CHEAPEST.

Her original plan was to have a holter monitor for 24hrs & ekg and go from there. I wasn’t able to get a holter to rent so unfortunately we had to relay on my Fitbit but I also got an finger pulse oximeter to track my symptoms especially when I felt them. I was suggest to also get a BP cuff but baby steps. I plan on ordering an electric arm bp when I can.

I had my EKG which clearly showed a need for a Ortho BP.

My overall plan was at LEAST get it addressed and in my records for when I eventually DO have to change PCPs for what ever insurance I can scramble up. That way my new pcp can see and maybe I can get in with a real cardiologist.

I’m just so damn grateful that my doctor listen to me. I love receptive doctors. Thank you Dr. R for being a Queen and not ignoring how I have to live and feel based on the words “I pass out randomly.” You gave your thoughts, I CHALLENGED them and you listened. Thank you. Thank you for not having a fragile ego and working on this together.

[thatgaylittlefrog]

E v e r y ask

If you insist, dear anon!

vanilla - how has your week been?

Ehhh. A bit rough, if I’m going to be completely honest. I miss my friends from school and my boyfriend quite a lot, and things with my mother have been.. tense. Oh! I also was kind of forced out of the closest, which was super fun.

chocolate - what do you crave right now?

Cuddles with my boyfriend. Since he’s far away though, I guess my pets will have to suffice.

red velvet - what type of music do you like?

My favorite Pandora station as of late is called “Hipster Cocktail Party”. Take that as you will.

ice cream - if you were an animal, what kind would you be?

I have a lot of house cat tendencies, but I really love the idea of being a bird. I’m absolutely fascinated by them, and the ability to fly and see the world from a different view would be wonderful. I suppose if I had to choose one, I’d be a mourning dove. They mate for life and are real great birds. That said, I’d also be down to be an owl, because owls are the fucking best, man.

cake - describe your ideal location

If we were to just combine all the places I love into some sort of amalgamation, it’d be a quaint little cottage in a heavily forested area. There’d be a clear and clean lake nearby, and I’d live there with the person I love and many, many pets. Fuck, that got cliché as all hell.

mocha - what are three things that make you feel warm inside?

1. The rare moments my cats actually decide to lay by me

2. Sitting on the floor in my two boys’ dorm room

3. Literally just any time I’m with my boyfriend. I’m an absolute mess.

frosting - describe your appearance!

I’ve got red, curly hair that goes down to my shoulders and always seems to be perpetually frizzy no matter what I do with it. I have eyes that are mostly green if you don’t look too closely. My skin is unfortunately pale, and due to me being a ginger the only time I get color is if I burn. I have a strong, pointed nose and an unfortunately weak jawline. I wish I could somehow flip the two. I’m fairly tall, standing in at 5′9′’, and a bit overweight. I have too many stretch marks and not enough freckles, the fashion sense of a 12 year old boy and a mother all in one, and could name far too many things I’m unhappy about with my appearance. I’m trying to be more positive, but I’m finding it to be a challenge.

marshmallow - do you sleep with plushies? if so, which are your favorites?

I do. I usually sleep with just one, as I find it to be roughly the same size as my dog. My go to is Lisa, a bunny I’ve had since I was a baby. I take her just about everywhere, as I have trouble sleeping without having something to hold.

sorbet - describe an ideal summer day

It’s not grossly hot and humid out, and there’s a slight breeze. It’d be best spent outside in nature, maybe even on or in the water. It’s full of sun and laughter, and lasts well into the night. There may even be a session of stories shared around a campfire.

butterscotch - describe an ideal autumn day

The sun and its warmth are being replaced by the cold, cutting air. The leaves are at their peak color, and the sky is grey. It’d be a good day to walk, so long as it isn’t raining. Rain isn’t a deal breaker though, as rainy autumn days provide the opportunity to get bundled up in a bunch of blankets, make a warm beverage of your choice, and get some reading done. You may even get the chance to take a nap. Bonus points if these are done with a person you’re fond of.

caramel - describe an ideal winter day

It’s not horrifically cold out, maybe it’s around 20 degrees (fun fact: it’s currently below zero in good old MN). There’s a light snow coming down. It’s spent going and doing some winter activities outdoors, maybe sledding, maybe just a walk in the woods. After that, I’d go back home, get warm and cozy, and maybe pop in a movie or show that I like.

pecan - describe an ideal spring day

I always love going on nature walks in the spring. There’s something about seeing the plant life coming back that’s invigorating. There’d be plenty of time spent outside to make up for the deficit of sunlight just experienced during the winter. Lots of dog walks, lots of exploring. Maybe even some gardening, if that’s at all possible.

mint - what’s new in your life?

I’m back at home now, which is weird to say because it doesn’t really feel so much like home anymore. How can something so old and familiar feel new and foreign? I’m also out to my immediate family, which is very new and strange to me. It hasn’t been very pretty, either.

pie - “home is where…”

The creatures I care about are. I word it that way because my pets are important to me too.

macaroon - list three things you feel inspired to do

1. Read some more of A Feast For Crows. Maybe even finish it over break, if I feel so inclined.

2. Work out, get in shape and maybe even lose some weight. I’d honestly love to just have a better endurance again, as I used to be a cross country kid.

3. Learn how to play my blasted ukulele. Quite a few of my college friends are able to play instruments, and I feel the need to prove myself. 

Thank you for asking!

[writemywalks]

Letters to the piece of my heart: Ushuaia

After last year events I haven’t flashbacked much, in fact, they cured me of all the drama-related crap and now I barely whine or regret about trying new things like  i rarely feel that out-of-nowhere sadness. Sometimes true sad things set life priorities for you and you just chill the hell down.

Ergo, with that mindest I left home (aka new home/grandma house) a day after Christmas to the airport with a clenched butt, since my budget for the actual trip was very low and I had no credit card to back me up. But in spite of it, with a whatever comes attitude, me and my friend took off and myself finally enjoyed a flight for the first time, since the last two i did, I had a bad time being suspended on air in a locked-up plane.

For the first time in my life, I made this trip with zero expectations, like I wasn’t daydreaming or creating likely scenarios in my head. The only thing that was at the back of my brain was that, this Plan B was going to be made in honor of what Plan A should have been about. Even though our flight was delayed for almost three hours, everything was fine and we made it safe and sound.

Outside the airport while looking for a taxi, we came to realize that it was very windy and that in fact, there wasn’t a drop of the heat we left back in Buenos Aires. We were kind of insecure about the hostel we booked, since it looked too good to be true, but at this point we were already free falling. Once we checked-in and settled in our rooms, we saw that, in fact, everything was just like in the booking page pictures, and we had a plus: our shared bedroom had a dreamy view with mountains that seemed to be 5′ away. 

Gotta say I love having anecdotes of roomates farting in the middle of the night, or people having smelly feet that make you almost pass out, you really hate it when you’re there but I look back laughing now.

I think our first tour was “The end of the world” train that is basically a comfortable train with big windows indeed that takes you throughout dreamy landscapes while you’re being told the old prisoners stories that used to work in the mines located there.

It was a nice ride and bet my life that must be a whole dream on winter, with all those mountains and landscapes full of snow. There were some waterfalls, little lakes, and some good scenery that a movie would do.

On the same day we also booked a tour to the “Canal Beagle”, a channel where there’s the iconic “end of the world lighthouse”, sea lions and pinguins. This was the tour which worth every penny we payed. When we took our sits inside the catamaran, the view from the window of the city from afar looked similar to the Niek Engelschmanbrug buildings in Amsterdam. Once the city landscape was out of sight, we decided to approach the bow of the boat and there are no words to express how much freedom, feeling like singing and all that carefree crap i felt right there. I was like, living in the present is the moto one should live with.

After our first tour we went back to the hostel and spent the following two days boring the hell out of us. Me neither my friend are what we would call antisocial but we are really laid back people, so we weren’t having much sucesss regarding making new friends in the hostel, so we spent the time drinking mate, laying down in the sofa listening to music and scrolling down IG (and with our friend scolding us from her own beach vacation through FaceTime for being lazy asses).

The following day we woke up very early since we had to go to Laguna Esmeralda, a 2 hour and a half trekking to a Lake with a emerald color with white-peaked mountains as far as eye could see. I must have lost almost four pounds walking up and down those muddy paths where I baptized half leg after my friend pulled me down when she almost slipped herself.

Even though you stop to take some pictures, none of them does justice to what your retinas and brain keep for the rest of your life. The most I remember was being eager to reach the lake, the wind against my face, feeling so small in front of those enormous and even more majestic mountains, Indeed some things that a snapshoot would never show.

The first thing we did when we arrived to the lake was devouring our ham and cheese sandwiches, we were starving like mad after such long walk. Then well-fed and full, we decided to take a 5′ nap in front of this movie set-like place. I tried FaceTiming my family but we were so far from everything that we didn’t have any signal at all. I remember trying to capture a lot of videos of my camera and there’s some pictures on my cellphone with my ass laying near the lake trying to capture some good shoots from below. Some other people were icing their beer amongs the rocks since the water was quite cold and there were people gather here and there chatting and with the same wide-eyed gaze we probably had.

When we had enought rest, we walked beside the lake and tried to find some another view closer to the white-peaked mountains. Whatever we looked, it looked dreamy and sadly, we only had 40 minutes to record that in our minds before the truck came to take us to the city again. Our way back to the entrance seemed to take hours, since we were completely out of air and our legs were already giving up. 

Since my budget was low, I just knew these were about to be the only three tours and experiences I would have in the whole trip. They weren’t THAT expensive but I didn’t have much to spend around and we still had to buy our New Year’s Eve dinner. 

On December 31th, me and my friend woke up with the idea to just walk around the city since even walking the streets was a dream. Don’t ask us how but we ended up taking another tour since I remembered I had the hostel deposit left, I made my last bet and we made our way to Glaciar Martial.

The way to the Glaciar was non-stop uphill, we would stop once in a while to catch some air because contrary to the Lake, the path never went downhill. But as we got closer to the peak of the mountain the air was not only more fresh but we saw from afar people playing in the peak of the mountain full of snow?

Let me tell you, my experience with snow is ZERO, I never had a winter holiday and I never seen it falling down and played like in a Christmas movie. I remember watching some vlogs of people playing with snow before I left for the trip but I knew it wasn’t winter season so there was no chance of seeing snow. I remember reaching the summit with my friend and walking over it with my trainers and since we had left with the idea of just walking around the city, my boots were sleeping in the hostel room and I told my friend “I feel I’m walking over my freezer” and my friend who already went to the South in winter said behind me “girl, this is what snow feels like” and I remember sliding down the hill and sincerely having the time of my life. 

And again, a picture never captures your ass freezing, the back of your mind singing that new song you just listened to and feeling the world is so full of wonder and a lot yet to be seen. The view from the top was outstanding. On our way back down, turning to the entrance some grief came out of nowhere and I started tearing up again. That’s how it works, I guess.

.While we were walking down, we were talking with my friend how much of a dream the ski center must be on winter, since there were some chairlifts hanging there and a winter place off service and my longing to see snow falling increased a bit more. Someday.

My wet ass and my friend came back the hostel and some guests were just chilling so we decided to call our Chilean friend we had made two days earlier and fetch some dinner, since the supermarkets closed at 6 pm.

Wish I could tell how much fun I had that night. Meeting a group of Russians, making Italians taste some Argentinian homemade beverages, eating different Chinese dishes made by a guy from Hong Kong who talked in a spotless british accent, laughing with the tall German guy who suggested picture poses and laughed everytime. I bet he barely spoke spanish or english but we understood each other. And ending up dancing with all this people. Duuuude, it’s so odd seeing foreign people dancing to local music but we laughed and man, the beer made in the South, let me tell you, it’s the best I’ve tasted in a while.

The countdown was such a thrill, that’s when I knew I wanted to spend every NYE ahead at places I haven’t seen yet. The rest of the night we spent it, chillin with the only people awake in the hostel: the Argentinians. Everyone else were already sleep by 2 am. Extremely odd for our culture.

I wish I could tell how much I learned from this trip, how people who traveled on their own encourage us to do it, how safe I felt walking around the city at night with the friends we made there, that if you’re open enough, chances can be infinite.

I’m looking forward to more adventures like that.

It’s never too late to wake up to life.

[from-red-string]

Why?

This shout out for the simbar shippers after the lutteo ficweek, which I loved and is amazing. 

Sorry for not finishing it, I had some problems. 

Ps: Especial thanks to Ellie @fangirlelliethings for handling my excited self for this fic and proofreading for me ILY 

 Emms @rowbrinaswift I need your reaction haha

Anyway, Simbar now! I hope you like it.

“Why do you two work so well?”

When I first heard this question, my first reaction was to start laughing out loud. How could anyone think that?

We’ve had a long way to become what we are now. I’m not even sure how it started. I was a plastic rich girl from Buenos Aires and he was a waiter in Cancun. What were the chances of us meeting? What were our odds of ending up together?

But against all of the odds, we’ve met. The beginning was terrible. I thought Simón was Luna’s dog, also known as Luna’s best friend that was ridiculously in l love with her. And for Simón, I’m not sure what he thought about me for real, but he politely says that he had no problem with me even though I was mean to Luna.

After a while, I broke up with Matteo, who was in love with Luna and she liked him back. Since I needed to get away from Matteo, my best option for a pair up was Simón. Even better, we were two products of love rejection.

What better way to fix a broken heart than to meet another one?

It was cool to skate with him. We seemed connected, we had the same rhythm. The rhythm that guide me was the same that guide him. Skating together had made me realize that we worked together very well.

This realization scared me so bad. Nothing ever worked well for me naturally. I've always needed to make things to go my way. It was good for once to just let it be and it was going fine by itself. With Simón, it was easy to talk, to dance, to play, to be me, it was easy but also so intense. Every feeling I got around him was strong, awestruck, real. Nothing was a pretense.

And my stupid self had noticed how great they were, so I had this ridiculous revenge plan where I wanted to make Simón against Luna because I thought that would make her suffer as much as I suffered when she took my best friend. I didn’t realize that was a mistake until it was too late.

I was in love. Probably, I was in love with him even before that but when I noticed it, the scariest moment of my life came right after that. If I'd thought that what I felt when I was with Simón was fear, I was wrong. When Simón discovered the plan, I saw that the fear I felt before was not even close to a real fear. The only thing that made me feel good. The only person with who I could be myself and I manage to destroy all of this. I was so afraid of losing him. In that time, he told me something that was painful but true.

“You can’t lose what you’ve never had for real. All we had was a lie - your lie.”

It took me so much time to stop thinking about this sentence. Even after he had forgave me, he needed to say a billion times that he didn't mean it that way.

“I was angry hurt boy. I wanted you to feel as bad as I felt. I was yours before you first talked to me. I knew I was yours when I first saw you on Jam & Roller’s stage singing. I heard your voice and I knew it was a lost battle, I couldn’t fight against it.”

For so long, the guilt of hurting Simón followed me but we are okay now. I realized Simón doesn’t care about this anymore, so it was time for me to let it go. I’ve learned that those plans and acts only end up by hurting me and who I loved so it needed to be in the past.

About love - my first “I love you” came out on one of our secret nights, the ones when Simón would sneak in my room late night and leave early morning. I’m sure Amanda noticed the existence of male clothes in a drawer in my closet but she's never said a word about it, at least not to me.

“Do you really need this thing on all night?” Simón asked pointing at the air conditioner, taking his shirt off. “It’s winter. It’s already cold.” He complained sitting on my bed.

“I need the air on to sleep and you wouldn’t feel so cold if you'd wear some clothes.” I said coming from the closet and laughing when he gasped, but then smirked and I frowned.

“You want me with clothes on? Okay.” He reached for his shirt on the floor, provoking me. I stopped him by stepping up closer and putting a hand on his chest.

“No.” I said shaking my head and slowly pushing him to lay down. “I can keep you warm.” Then I kissed him.

Eventually, the “I love you” slipped out of my lips, shocking Simón. He already confessed his love a hundred times before and in various forms. He has never rushed me to say it back even through he wanted to hear me saying it, so hearing it from me for the first time made him really happy. Also it made me happier for feeling confident enough for saying it out loud.

Our happiness could've lasted longer if the whole 'Sol Benson' drama didn't come. The discovery that I wasn’t Sol Benson had wrecked me. First, I wasn’t Ámbar Smith, then I wasn’t Sol Benson. I freaked out. I believed that I was no one that I had nothing and no one, and the life that I've lived before was somebody else's life. Everything previous had belong to someone else, so I needed to start over. I needed a name. I chose to be the new “Ámbar Smith”, I created her before so it was time to recreate her. If Sharon Benson’s ever wished to destroy someone’s life, that was when she'd succeeded.

I felt so lost, I had no direction to go, I was a train whose rail ended but couldn't stop itself. Simón had tried to help me, to make me stop, to reach out for me, but I kept pushing him away, I confused his care for control and I didn’t need somebody to try control my life.

He tried everyday, he didn’t give up. Somehow he knew I still needed him.

When I couldn’t handle it anymore, ready for a free fall, he was there to catch me.

Together we started solving the dazzle that was me. He helped me to get to know who I am and we realized that he already was a part of me.

One day we were coming back from my therapy session in Simón's car - Luckily, he got his license during my dark phase, it was truly just luck - I have no idea how someone like him could pass. I’ve become our official driver, soon after I got my license. We figured out that was safer.

“Last song was bit lame. But that beat.” Simón commented replaying the best with his mouth. I had no idea what music is he talking about.

“Yes, obvi.” I agreed taking my eyes off the window, Simón laughed.

“You ignored the radio.” He stated shaking his head smirking. “A kiss for your thoughts.” We usually do that to get things from each other, it’s a silly joke but I enjoy it. And that would've worked if he wasn’t driving.

“Concentrate on the road and try not kill us, driver.” I replied. Although he was an okay driver, I wouldn’t bet our life on Simón’s multitasking skills. Simón grinned and turned the radio up.

 I don’t ask for you to change, baby no no no

And you don’t ask for me to change

 Tell me how we're not alike

But we work so well and we don’t even know why

 “This song is way better.” He smiled saying it. I silently agreed, smiling back, then turned back to the window again.

But I couldn’t ignore this song.

In that time, I still lived in Benson’s mansion, even through I didn’t talk to Sharon anymore. I ate in the kitchen and started being friend with Luna. She made staying there easier. Almost the whole time I spent in the mansion was with her - studying, watching movies, even cooking.

Within a year, I moved in with Simón. We were alright living together. He cooked I did the math - bills part and we divide the cleaning duties. I was finishing college, so sometimes we had a few parties to go. At one specific party there was a cold night, the people that went there were not that cool and we didn’t feel like drinking, we weren’t enjoying being there, but I needed to stay a little because it was my classmate's birthday.

“So cold!” I murmured to myself, brushing my arms with my hands, Simón gave me his jacket. Sometimes, cold seemed to be just a thing from my head because I was shaking but Simón didn't feel a thing.

“Aren’t you the one who loves the air on?” He mocked, hugging me. Simón was trying to make us leave the party and go home, he want us to have some privacy. It was taking all of me not to give in.

“It’s different.” I answered and I shivered losing my breath when he kissed a skin spot right below my ear. He knows me too well. “You’re dirty, Simón. That’s a low move.”

“I’m just a player who try to beat his enemy.” He whispered low with his lips almost glued to my ear, then gave me a hickey on the neck making me suppress the moan that arised. “Can we go now?”

He asked taking a step back to look in my eyes. I nodded unable to speak. I gave in. After all those years, Simón's effect on me was still as surprising as the first, but it’s stronger and better each time.

9 months after that night, Emma came, our first daughter. Fortunately, I had only 6 months of college to go when I got pregnant so Emma came in the right time. Emma’s birth was perfect and we couldn’t be happier. Luna is her godmother, she really loves Emma. Emma was the best unexpected thing that happened to us.

And that’s a huge fact when nothing on your parents life is as expected or has a plan set.

“Emms, your mom is sleeping.” I heard Simón, whispering to the 1 year old Emma in his arms, when I woke up from my nap on the sofa. I got up to give them a kiss.

“Hey, how was your day at the studio?” I asked letting Emma play with my hand. Simón has a studio with the Roller Band, they were a pretty famous band but they've decided to do less tours and work more on producing music. Simón says they want to give a chance to some new bands.

“Good. Emma was a success singing with Pedro. What about you? How is Fab & Chic going?” He said with his hand caressing my cheek. Oh yeah, I work with Jazmín and Delfi, we created the Fab & Chic brand clothes, there’s a store and a fashion blog, we are doing pretty well. I’m the manager, the three of us have different accomplishment functions in the company, each if us doing what is best at. Emma goes with us to work some days, since she’s on vacation from her daycare.

And now, 10 years after that day, things didn’t change much. And you could’ve thought that would be boring, well, you would be wrong. It’s not that we've found a happily ever after - we don’t. We can’t find something that doesn’t exists. But we know we are happier living together than apart, so we just live passing through whatever we need.

Okay, many things have changed. Luna and Matteo are married, Gastón and Nina aren’t yet - Nina keeps delaying it. I can’t judge it, Simón and I haven't got married neither, but we don’t need this. About us, we had twins, Ellie and Lucas, who are the best planned thing in what we succeed in.

At least, one of them was planned. The twin part wasn’t exactly expected.

But Emma is the one who changed the most. She can eat alone, wipe herself, sleep the whole night, walk and talk. Indeed, it was her question that started all this wondering.

My eyes are locked to Simón's. We are on the sofa and the twins are watching Trolls on TV.

“We don’t know why.” I answered for both of us, looking at Emma.

“It need to have reason.” Emma whispers staring the TV.

“Is it the time?” Simón mouths to me, my eyes widened. I think he’s right. Oh girl, my baby. I nodded. “Emms,” He calls her, she turns to him. “When a boy and a girl like each other,”

“No no no. I already…” Emma stands up saying with the hands on her hips. She’s undeniably my daughter. “I’m done.” And goes to the kitchen. We start laughing, the twins looking at us, confused but soon go back to watching the movie.

“You started just perfect.” I mocked getting closer to him and laid my head on his shoulder.

“I love you.” He says kissing my forehead.

“I love you.”