#i think the major cloud and venom snake are the only ones that are. more obvious? but i could be wrong.

[fstbmp-a]

I got bored, so you must all be subjected with something that either makes complete sense or I have absolutely baffled you with some of these pulls.

[cannedcrow]

‘Flower Frost’ - An Empires SMP/Flower Husbands fanfic: Part X, Convolvulus

Flower Frost: Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV, Part V, Part VI, Part VII, Part VIII, Part IX

Please reblog if you enjoy! :)

Convolvulus (Major): Bonds of affection, even with extinguished hopes.

Gem lay curled in her bed, a small figure shrouded in layers of silk, wool, and fur - the futile nest of warmth that’d been her home for days now. Weak winter sunlight streamed through the lilac glass of her window, dappling the room with indifferent light while the honeysuckle that climbed the walls and peeked through the window showed the true state of affairs, its limp petals dull and rimmed with frost, yellow heads drooping in mourning.

The frozen channels of her wound had spread quickly, snaking like veins of ore through rock, and the warm copper of her hair had succumbed to the slight of silver-white, like so many strands of frost haloing her. If she looked in a mirror, she could see her own heart through the clear, glassy ice, the purity stained with her own blood like ink in water, motion perpetually frozen. And still the wound spread, always reaching out more spiderweb cracks that widened into ice-soldered ravines in her flesh until one by one she lost the use of her limbs to the ice that made her very veins feel iron-wrought. It was only a matter of time until it killed her, she knew, and she couldn’t help looking forward to it, for it was as though she’d been run through with knives, so cold that they burned like an iron brand - one that never cooled.

Fwhip sat by her bedside day after day, often joined by Sausage, only leaving to take care of affairs in his own kingdom. He read to her, talked to her, while Gandalf curled on her bed, the little ash-silver cat evidently aware that his mistress needed his warmth.

It almost hurt Gem more to watch Fwhip crumble as the ingravescence of her affliction became clearer, and indeed he did wear away. To see his sister lying there, frail and delicate as an injured sparrow, was agonising. The shallow breaths that clouded the air, the hateful mass of silver hair that seemed like a malignant vine intent on choking her, the skin as pale and bloodless as a corpse - every detail was a knife to his heart.

Her suffering was his, and it grew and mutated into fury. This was Scott’s fault. Scott had done this to Gem and abandoned her to die. I’ll kill him, he thought venomously, the promise of violent retribution the only thing keeping him sane.

If Gem dies, I’ll burn you alive and put your entire damned Empire to the torch.

A nightingale began to sing from somewhere outside.

-

Days went by before Jimmy noticed the dusk-purple that began to gradate his hands. This is the beginning of the end, then, he thought, examining his numbing fingertips, the first hesitant signs of frostbite. He was so cold, trapped constantly in a cage of ice that was undeterred by fire or heat, and as close as he’d sit to the fire, as tightly as he may wrap himself in blankets, he could not get warm.

For all this though, Jimmy would’ve been happy to die there. The circumstances that’d brought them there were dark, but he’d been happy.

-

Scott held Jimmy's hand gently in his own, staring at his discoloured fingertips in horror. Both had known the severity of the Winter Plague, and both had seen their people die one by one at its hands. But to see the sickness slowly creeping over Jimmy like frost on petals was a confirmation, the tightening of a noose around his throat. Scott had enfolded him in a wordless embrace, clinging onto him as tightly as though it were himself dying, and Jimmy had felt the cold tears dampen his shoulder, the subtle tremble of Scott's own shoulders.

It was over their usual habit of sitting by the fireside in the evening that Scott broached the thoughts that'd consumed his attention for so long.

"Do you think we should go back to the empires?" He said slowly, measuring his words.

Jimmy looked to him, knowing then that they'd reached the same conclusion already. "I think we have to," he said, thinking of Lizzie, of his other friends, of his people. "I guess that's what I came here to do, anyhow. But what about your uh ... Angel-of-Death thing?" The corner of his mouth twitched up.

"I don't mean to return to our normal life, but I think we should be closer to our people and the Empires,” Scott declared, “We could live in my manor in Rivendell; that way we'll be able to keep eyes on goings-on without making contact. It might even be worth sneaking in - the servants won't be working in the house without me there, and if no one knew we'd come back, we could avoid any problems."

Jimmy nodded, "Hunkering and trying to cure the Winter Plague. Sounds like a plan!”

And so it was settled, and they made plans to return to the Empires. It was no difficultly to gather their few belongings into shulkers, and from his ever-generous ender chest, Scott produced not only a spare elytra but a lodestone compass that pointed to Rivendell. It was a small but beautifully made affair framed in gold filigree, with a slim chain allowing it to be worn as a necklace.

“It took us both a while to get here because we didn’t know where we were going, but as the crow flies, it shouldn’t take too long to get home,” Scott determined.

There was no particular reason to clear out the little house, and they chose instead to leave most of it to the elements. The two armchairs would face the empty fireplace for years, perhaps. Mice would nest in the cushions, snow would powder the floor, and brave weeds would push between the rotting floorboards.

Their last night, they braved the outside to sit on the partial roof of the cabin that’d served them so faithfully.

Above the clawing branches of the trees, the sky was a star-scattered abyss, a carelessly broken pearl necklace on a sea of black velvet. Courtesy of the full moon, the snowflakes glowed with moonlight until they rivalled even their celestial cousins, and the sky was silent but for the occasional mourning of an owl. Jimmy was wrapped in Scott’s storm-blue cloak, the pale fur soft against his neck. Warmth of any sort did little for him, but the cold was more uncomfortable for him than Scott, who sat in only his usual clothes - a deep cyan shirt of thin wool, the collar embroidered subtly with gold, and his customary trousers and boots. Moonlight glittered on the frost in his hair and wings, giving him an ethereal look - a composition of stars, watching wistfully his fellows in the night sky. How can anyone be so beautiful? He thought, entranced despite his firm self-admonishment for thinking of Scott as anything but his closest, dearest friend.

Scott tilted his head from the stars then, looking at Jimmy and smirking. His eyes glimmered with captured moonlight, and with mock flirtatiousness, he said, “Can’t keep your eyes off me, huh?”

Jimmy snorted, hoping to hide the flush of his face behind a matched tone of nonchalance. “You wish.”

Scott’s hand fluttered to his heart and with a tone of feigned injury, he said, “Are you saying you don’t find me irresistibly sexy and enchanting?”

A thought seemed to strike him then, and he held one hand in front of him, palm upward expectantly, the tips of those icy claws glinting. With the other he summoned a tiny flurry of snow that danced and melted together at his conduct, shaping itself into-

“A token of my esteem,” Scott declared proudly, displaying his creation. On his palm there sat a little ice statue about the size of a chess piece, depicting a leaping codfish on a spray of frozen water, a crown on its head. Jimmy took it in fascination, examining the intricacy and beauty of the figure.

“It’s beautiful!” He said excitedly, holding the piece up to view through the moonlight, “you’re getting good at being an ice demon!”

Scott flinched slightly, and Jimmy once again cursed his careless words. Unconfident in his ability to summon the right words, he threw himself towards Scott, hugging him tightly and murmuring consolingly into his shoulder, “I’m only teasing. You’re not a demon.”

When he pulled back, Scott looked surprised but flushed, and he felt the same warmth come to his own face as he grinned at him. Then Scott leant forward and kissed him.

[canonicallysoulmates]

I love thorki too! I've been on a fic binge recently. Got any thorki fic recommendations? Do you have any preferences for that pairing like you do with wincest and J2?

This is some great timing because I myself have also been going on a thorki fic binge! And this time I’ve actually remembered to save some of them so I do have some recs; I also do have preferences for them, I am all about the bottom!Loki. 

This is a mix of new and old favs, as always heed any warnings and happy reading!

A Season in Valhalla by welcomestars

“Thor, son of Frigga, son of Odin,” the Guard of Valhalla said in a rough monotone more reminiscent of a rockslide than a voice. They did not look down at him, but rather continued to stare straight forward. “It is not yet your time.”

Thor cleared his throat. “I know. I am here on a quest,” he explained. “I intend to find my brother and bring him home.”

bliss disclosed by maharlika

Loki rolled his eyes. “Goodbye, brother.”

With that, Loki reached out and opened the door to his chambers.

Three kittens tumbled out, one over the other, onto the carpeted floor of the hallway.

“I see,” Thor said, raising a delighted eyebrow.

Love is in the hair by CherryPie0

It all started when Loki decided to tie his hair up.

for my heart to touch upon your heart by lavenderlotion

“Loki,” Thor whispered again, deeper than before, as he held his brother so tight it felt as though Thor would break his fragile bones.

But Loki didn’t protest. Loki didn’t do anything but hug him back, his fingers clinging to the material of Thor’s tunic just as desperately.

Mama Loki by CherryPie0 (mpreg)

"I can't believe I let you convince me to have children," Loki accuses him, as if it's not the best thing that has happened to him. Thor knows that, too, of course.

____

Just Thor, Loki and their children being a happy family!

Rebirth by LenkaVittoriaElisse16

Loki runs his hand over Thor's head. Thor is still uncomfortable about the grandmaster shaving his hair off.

cause you're all i need by servicetopthor*

"I'm here."

“If I still had Mjolnir, I would place her on your chest so you could never leave me again,” Thor finally spoke, his voice coming out rough and slow.

Steadfast by ofamaranthlie*

Thor has always been physically stronger than Loki, and Loki finds that unbelievably hot. De-anoning from norsekink.

Cherished by Runie (Runic)* (pregnant!loki, intersex!loki)

"This is another of your tricks, made worse by the fact you brought Mother into it. You expect me to fight for your freedom after what you have done? Nay, Loki, I shall not, nor will I believe you carry my child."

"What did you think would happen when a fertility god could not stop himself from rutting into my reproductive parts!"

What is a dad? by TheAngryKimchi (mpreg)

Loki finds out he's pregnant, but can't come up with a way to tell Thor.

Share your life with him by athousandfaces

Thor gets hurt, so Loki uses his seidr to fix him - even if he has to shake Midgard to its core for it.

Forbidden Desires by chokememrstark

"If you're here I might even give you a hug." - "I'm here."

Set right after those words, Loki gets much more than a simple hug from his brother. He's not giving Thor an easy victory, but if he's honest this is all he desired for a long time. He's finally being dominated by the only one he ever wished to be dominated by and he can't think of anything he wants more.

Getting what he wants by Magicandmalice

Loki had turned hurt, watery green eyes on Thor. Not a word had been exchanged before Jane had found herself looking up at an enraged Thor. Black clouds rolling outside and thunder shaking the building as it sounded.

Black As Coal by Runie (Runic)* (jotun!loki, intersex!loki, pregnant!loki)

It is tradition for the Æsir to give cats to new brides. For Loki, the little kitten Thor gifts to him is all he has, until he falls into a conspiracy to rid Thor of his Jotun Queen.

One Who Wants For Nothing by KingLoptr (Aestridr)*

Loki is pregnant and happy, and really that's all Thor ever needs.

The Return of Light by sherlockssexysocks (mpreg mention)

When Loki left, it rained for a century. The people of Asgard called it the Great Drowning. They know why it rains and yet few accept it. Those who do desperately search for the Fallen One.

to whom can a god appeal for mercy by amberfox17

Post-The Dark World story, dealing with the ending. Obviously major spoilers.

On storms and earthquakes by Sojka (mpreg)

For norsekink prompt: Thor is the God of Thunder. In mythology Loki causes earthquakes because of his writhing against the snake venom, so lets go with the idea that he can just cause earthquakes in general. This would probably make for LOUD and definitely nature effecting sex if they're really going at it.

Be Calm, Brother by Desade* 

Mostly smut, with a smidge of backstory. Set post-Avengers, because damned if that muzzle didn't make an impression on me.

A Small Crime by locoforloki (WARNING: mentions of abortion, mentions of infanticide, no happy ending)

The Avengers have fallen apart and Tony tries to save them.

Or:

Loki just shrugs, his eyes distant as he watches a plane speed down the runway.

What would happen if we crashed, Thor wonders aloud.

We would die, Loki says almost longingly.

Thor places a hand on Loki's knee and squeezes gently.

I would save you, he promises.

I did not ask you to, Loki whispers.

* these fics contain explicit or mature content

[glarnboudin]

Tiratola, the Long-Tailed Terror!

Aliases: the Dragon of Etna, the Serpentine Savior, Our Lady of Flame

Date Discovered: May 20th, 1954

Place of Origin: Mt. Etna

Notable Stomping Grounds: Mt. Etna, Messina, Pisa, Stromboli Kaiju Reserve

Height: Generally holds head around 15 meters above the ground, but can rear up to tower at around 34 meters at her tallest.

Length: 115 meters

Biology:

A prehistoric varanid of enormous size from the same lineage that produced Kraydi, Tiratola brings to mind the dragons of yore, slinking and serpentine and adorned with a crown of fearsome crests and horns. Indeed, her Mediterranean location closely matches with depictions of dragons from the ancient Greeks and Romans, although her demeanor is hardly that of a rapacious devourer of maidens and hoarder of gold.

Rather than her jaws, Tiratola’s primary weapon of choice is her tail - even for a reptile, hers is incredibly long and dexterous, making up more than half of her total body length and as flexible and powerful as the body of any snake. With it, she can lash at targets several hundred feet away, coil and constrict her opponents, and even pick up and hurl objects as big as buildings or handle very small objects with the very tip of the tail like an elephant’s trunk. Indeed, her style of combat is very similar to that of the American kaiju Gorgolisk, preferring to coil and constrict her opponents with her powerful body.

As a kaiju, Tiratola also sports a fairly standard powerset:

Super strength

An enhanced healing factor

Immunity to radiation

She also has one more trick up her sleeve - like many other prehistoric varanids as well as Tyrantis himself, the Terror of Italia sports venom glands within her jaws that she can either ‘chew’ into her opponents or spray like a spitting cobra, and like Tyrantis, this venom has further honed into a flammable compound like something out of the pages of myth and legend.

Of course, comparing Tiratola’s fire spitting with Tyrantis’ flaming breath would be akin to comparing a firecracker with a flamethrower - rather than napalm-like torrents of ignited venom, the enormous reptile’s sprayed venom ignites into a cloud of scalding sparks and embers that explodes outwards in a shotgun-like blast with a loud crack and a blinding flash. While it’s not the best at actually damaging opponents, it still stings and burns quite painfully for targets, especially if hit in the eyes and other sensitive areas, and the sharp rapport of the venom combusting can cause a few seconds of disorientation. Injecting the stuff into the bodies of opponents, however, produces rather more grisly results as it reacts with oxygen in the bloodstream, causing the wounds inflicted by her teeth to burst open a few seconds after she lets go. To a kaiju’s durability and regeneration, it’s not nearly as harmful as it looks unless Tiratola injects a truly immense amount of venom or her opponent is considerably smaller than herself, but it’s still quite painful to experience.

History & Personality:

When the Superquake of ‘54 rocked the world, the actual tremors weren’t the only force behind the resulting destruction - tidal waves lashed the coasts, avalanches and rockslides buried towns, and a number of already-rumbling volcanoes were roused to erupt once more, pushing up not only molten material but all manner of strange new landforms forged from the Yamaneon tunnels beneath the earth. Home to several volcanoes as they are, Greece and Italy were particularly subject to this, disgorging an assortment of subterranean environments alongside quite a number of kaiju. Among them was the great reptile Tiratola - emerging from the volcanic aftermath of Mt. Etna, the serpentine saurian made herself known to the public at large when she swept through the outskirts of Messina and smothered a major fire when she settled herself on top of it for warmth, inadvertently saving much of the city from burning to the ground. In the aftermath of the fire, she would go on to save even more lives as she nosed around the rubble, unearthing nearly two dozen people that had been trapped beneath fallen debris.

Since her awakening, Tiratola has come to roam across Italy and Greece, frequently digging people out of rubble wherever she went and frequently engaging smaller mutants emerging from local Yamaneon tunnels as well as the occasional full-on kaiju - her most famous scuffles include preying upon a hoard of Paleozoic invertebrates that emerged from a Carboniferous swamp in the Greek Kassandra Peninsula and engaging a hulking one-eyed hominid kaiju that had been menacing the city of Taranto, dragging it down to its doom beneath the waves before it could do anything worse than superficial damage to buildings. Aside from an incident involving the Leaning Tower of Pisa, she’s been responsible for relatively little destruction, and has become somewhat of a local hero to the populace of the regions, something that Tiratola has come to notice.

Low to the ground as she is, the Whip-Tailed Terror is by her nature literally closer to human beings than many other kaiju, and is more aware of their activities as a result. She’s come to recognize how people react to her presence and realizes how easily she can reshape the tiny world that she now finds herself in. Were she a more malevolent sort, this awareness and her ability to easily wind through city streets could potentially make her an incredibly dangerous thrat to human beings, but the ultimate result of this is that Tiratola has come to realize that she quite enjoys the attention and praise she gets from acts of heroism. Being a reptile, she is by nature a very energy-efficient creature, conserving her strength when she does need to exert herself… but being a kaiju, acts of aid towards humans are trivially easy for her. A couple sweeps of her tail can smother a major fire beneath dirt and water and pulling people from danger can be easily accomplished by simply pushing her head into, say, a burning building and using her keen senses to locate survivors in the same way that modern varanids break into termite mounds and locate warm chambers to lay their eggs in or mother crocodiles dig out their young from nests. It costs little to the great reptile to lend her aid to others, and the reward for doing so is more than worth it - adoration and cheers whenever she enters a populated area, occasional offerings of fish and other treats, even occasional cleanings by teams of volunteers that scrub her down and aid in peeling off any lingering bits of unshed skin. The latter task has also provided another boon to the people of Greece and Italy - analysis of Tiratola’s shed skin has shed a lot of light on kaiju cellular biology, and the scales themselves are durable enough to be shaped and worked like metal or glass, fostering a small but lucrative industry of decorative items made from the kaiju’s scales.

However, there may also be another reason for her gentleness towards humans - while unearthing survivors from rubble, Tiratola frequently makes vocalizations not unlike those of crocodilian and alligator parents when unearthing their buried young, even scooping them up in her jaws in a similar fashion to carry them to safety. It may be that trapped survivors reminds the the whip-tailed dragon of her own offspring, buried in sand and soil - joint Reptodite-human expeditions into the collapsed tunnels where the kaiju emerged have even found the crystallized remains of ruined nests and cracked eggs, suggesting that she may have produced several clutches of offspring before via parthenogenesis in the same manner as some species of monitor lizard, although none seem to have survived. 

Behind the Scenes:

Behold, my entry to @tyrantisterror ’s ATOM Create a Kaiju Contest 3D, Tiratola! I’ve entered both of his previous contests, and I didn’t want to miss out here, although this is admittedly my first time posting one here to Tumblr; there’s a bunch of really creative kaiju already entered into the competition, and I highly recommend checking them out. My entry really isn’t the best by far (I wanted to make Tiratola a lot lengthier and more serpentine, but I didn’t have the space to do it, and I can’t really do detail work for shit), but I’m still reasonably happy with how my girl Tiratola came out!

Tiratola is meant to be an homage to that tried-and-true staple of the monster movie genre - movie companies from other countries trying to cash in on a trend! It’s how the world got creatures like Gorgo, Paleosaurus, and Reptilicus - creatures whose movies were far from the source material, but were packaged as being the same thing in their posters and translated titles overseas, leading to weirdness like Godzilla vs Mothra becoming ‘Watang and the Fabulous Kingdom of Monsters’ in its Italian release, the infamous cut of ‘The Volcano Monsters,’ and so on. As such, she takes the basic concept of Tyrantis - ‘giant green prehistoric reptilian monster with a long tail and horns that breathes fire’, and reconstructs it through that lens. To that end, she’s also somewhat based on slurpasaurs and on cheap rubber props, staples of Italian monster cinema.

Designwise, I based her quite heavily on, well, monitor lizards as well as the classic LEGO dragon model plus the movie poster design for Reptilicus - both are a nice combination of reptilian features that doesn’t really lend itself to any particular order, with Kraydi factoring in as another reference. Indeed, Tiratola’s meant to be a cousin to that kaiju, another of the varanid lizard lineage that would have lead to dragons and their kin in the Lost Epoch - she’s meant to be a bit farther down that evolutionary line than Kraydi is, but still not exactly a direct ancestor.

I was struggling to get a feel for Tiratola’s personality at first, but I managed to get something when I reread ATOM and the way that its reptilian stars think, plus some takes on protective dragons and why they defend humans so much smaller and weaker than they. A big part of this series is about how the kaiju are far more intelligent and empathetic than they let on - I thought it’d be neat to play off of that. While her motivations come from a very different place than they would in a human being or a similar creature, the end result is still the same: if it feels good to help others, and doing so is relatively easy, why not do so? I also added a good deal of Ogra and Reptisaurus as well - I figured it would be only fitting.

The thing about her visiting Pisa is a nod to Dinosaurs Attack, the card where the Rhedosaurus and Giant Behemoth teamed up to destroy the Leaning Tower, while her battle with the giant is taken from the battle between the dragon Taro and the Cyclops in The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad. The date of her discovery is also the date that Reptilicus was released in theaters, albeit moved back a few years.

[nightashes]

Anxceit!! With Virgil having stood up for Janus, Virgil got hurt, and Janus now has to help him!!

You Help Me. I Help You.

a/n: Thanks so much for suggesting this! You’ll have to let me know what you think!

warnings: bullies. blood. violence.

ao3 version - writing masterlist

The sun is high in the sky. A few clouds drift by, wispy in appearance. As if an artist had taken a paintbrush and lightly blended them into the blue of the atmosphere. Janus sits amongst a collection of philosophy books, full of sticky notes and highlighter. His computer lies open in his lap, an empty word document stares out from the screen, mocking the student. Taunting him with the blinking of the text cursor, as more and more minutes pass without anything new to add to the page.

Janus has plenty to say on society. On morals he could rant for hours. Gender roles, he might as well clear his schedule for the day. But, the philosophy of love? He just couldn’t bring himself to care. 

Marriage is just a made up cultural obligation that society forces everyone to care about. Oh, these people love each other! Let’s spend all of our money on an unnecessary ceremony that will force the couple to stay together or face tons of debt to undo. And that’s just marriage. Romance in general is completely overrated, overpraised, and overdone. 

Janus sighs, shifting his capelet on his shoulders in agitation. With spring slowly turning to summer, his signature outfit was beginning to grow uncomfortable in the heat. But did Janus care? Absolutely not. Beauty was pain and he loves his bowler hat and capelet more than society loves its billionaires. 

He stares out across the campus lawn, scowling. The warm weather not only threatens his comfort but it has attracted hordes of students, crowding together to distract people like him that actually have papers to write. Warm weather is just awful. Truly horrid. Nothing good about it. He thinks to himself, watching a nearby group of students push and prod each other, their laughter loud and obnoxious. And to his left, another student, similarly dressed in dark clothing lounges beneath a tree. He spies Janus watching him and gesturing to the loud group rolls his eyes in annoyance. Janus smiles back, nodding in agreement. The purple clad student smirks. Flipping to a new page in his notebook. He begins sketching, quick and messily he runs his pen across the lined paper. Drawing hurriedly, and sneaking glances at the group before them. Catching Janus’s eye once done, he grins deviously. Flipping the notebook over, the student dramatically reveals a rather rough sketch of the three being attacked by a giant snake. Their shocked and terrified expressions caused the philosophy major to burst out into a deep and ruckus laughter. Booming out through the area, it shocks the offending group into silence. They turn around seeking the source of the sound. “What the fudge, you laugh like a Disney villain.” The one wearing a puka necklace calls out.

Janus stifles his chuckles, as the three make their way over to his position. “What are you even laughing at? Did your imaginary friend tell a joke?” A guy in a baseball cap, who thinks himself clever, speaks with bravado.

His friend with the sunglasses continues. “Are you seriously wearing a cape right now? What are you, some kind of nutcase?”

“A cape, I have no idea what you could possibly be referring to? I’m wearing a perfectly boring and unoriginal outfit just like you three fashionistas?” Janus speaks, sarcasm dripping with each word, his eyes glinting with mischief.

“Did he just insult us?” Baseball cap questions. Genuinely looking confused. Janus can’t help but chuckle at the poor fellow.

“Oh, of course not. It was a compliment. I love it when people think wearing jeans and a t-shirt makes them an individual. You three must be so brave. I applaud you.” He slowly claps his hands, emphasizing each word. ”Good job on being so unique.”

Baseball Cap grabs the front of Janus’s jacket, lifting him up to a standing position. The brute leans in closely, his breath stinking of onions. He whispers menacingly. “You think you’re smarter than us? You think you’re better than us? You're wearing a frickin’ Halloween costume in April. You’re a freak.”

“Takes a freak to know a freak.” Janus breaks in. The brute throws him to the ground. He lands on his computer, a loud crack filling the air as the screen digs into his back. He winces painfully.

“HEY!” A voice, rough and angry, yells over the commotion. Janus rolls his head to the side, seeking the source of the shout. The darkly clad student is marching over, his fists are lowered to his side, his face dark, and his features pinched in rage. “GET AWAY FROM HIM!” His voice booms, venom dripping from his words as he shoves his way through the group, trying to reach Janus. 

Puka necklace grabs the hood of his jacket. Yanking him back into the center of their crew. Sunglasses grasp the student’s chin, “Well, well, well, What do we have here? Does the freak have a friend?”

The student glares back daggers, opens his mouth, and seizes Sunglasses’s hand between his teeth. He bites down hard, eliciting a scream of pain. Puka Necklace yanks him away from Sunglasses, while Baseball Cap gives him a right-hook to the check. The student collapses to the ground. Sunglasses kicks him in the ribs, clutching onto his bleeding hand. He lets loose a string of curse words. Kicking out again at the already down student, before stomping off. His buddies follow, angrily yelling and gesturing maddeningly.

With them gone, Janus rushes to the fallen student. The injured man lies on the ground, curled into a fetal position. His arms wrapping around him in comfort and protection. Janus kneels beside his fellow student. 

“Hey, hey don’t worry. You’re okay.” He whispers assurances as his gloved hand rests on the boy’s shoulder.

The student weakly shoves his hand away. “Leave me alone.” He snarls, trying his best to rise. He manages to crouch onto his knees. His palms pressed into the fertile green grass of the campus lawn. He bends his fingers, digging his nails into the soil, breathing heavily from his mouth. A drop of blood is smeared across his lower lip. “I’ve got this.” The student sighs.

Janus appraises the stubborn student. “Yeah. I can see that.” He shakes his head in exasperation. The philosophy major sits there in silence, his chin resting in his hand as he watches the much too proud student attempt to stand. The purple clad man clutches his ribs as he brings his legs up beneath him. Trying to shift onto his feet, only to wobble and fall to his side. 

“Ugh, everything hurts.” He groans.

“Oh really? Because I thought you were doing great? But, please, do let me know if you need a hand?”

“I’m fine.” The student spits, lying on his back, clearly not fine.

Janus rolls his eyes at the obvious lie. “Are you always this stubborn or is it only on Tuesdays?”

The student shifts his eyes to the side, examining his odd companion. “Just Tuesday and Thursdays. Although on Sundays I flip a coin.”

An amused tsk escapes Janus’s lips. “Well, I do appreciate the help with that gang. Running in like you did. You’re a true hero.” Janus bats his eyes, while his “savior” scrunches his face in annoyance. 

“Oh har-de-har-har. You’re a real comedian.”

“No, really, I mean it. You… well.. You tried to help. And I suppose, that’s a nice thing to do. It’s a shame it backfired so spectacularly.”

“Yeah, well, that’s the story of my life, I suppose.”

“Things would probably go a little better if you’d let me help you. The name’s Janus by the way.” He sticks out a hand to the supine student.

“Virgil.’ His attempted savior answers, giving an odd two-finger salute in response.

Janus smiles, refusing to withdraw his hand. “Will you let me help you, Virgil?”

Virgil stares into the sky, genuinely considering his options. “I suppose I’ve already made a big enough fool of myself.” The purple student declares to the universe, finally taking hold of the offered hand.

The philosophy major growls at the self deprecation. “Wow, you truly are a fool.” Janus pulls his “savior” into a sitting position. 

Virgil winces at the movement. “Thanks for the motivation.” 

“No, really, you are an absolute fool. Stay here, I have some napkins in my bag.”

“Uhh...How am I a fool?” Virgil questions, watching Janus grab his bag and return, holding a napkin up to Virgil’s face. 

“The fact that you think accepting help makes you a fool.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I get it. Everyone needs help. Oh, thanks.” Virgil winces as Janus applies the napkin to his lip. 

“No, you clearly don’t get it. Hold that there.” Janus releases the napkin into Virgil’s grasp, pulling out his phone to text Remus. “My roommate is pre-med. I’ll see if he’s free. Can you lift up your shirt? I need to see your ribs.”

“Uhh.. is that necessary?” Virgil blushes red and well… Janus just couldn’t pass it up. He leans in. 

“Is something wrong? You’re flushing red?” He hurriedly removes a glove from his hand. Pressing his bare palm to the forehead of the injured student. He leans in close, smiling. “You’re not feverish. Could it be… that you find me attractive?” His smile is wicked.

Virgil scowls pushing him away. “Please, just because you’re dressed like a Disney villain, does not mean I think you’re cool or attractive or anything.”

“Wait.” Janus reels back. “You like my outfit?”

“I mean, yeah. It’s just so unashamedly you. And well, Disney villains are just cool.”

“I can’t argue with that.” Janus leans in close again. “But I still would like to check your ribs. If you’d allow me.”

“Ummm… okay.” He lifts his shirt up slowly. Revealing bruises that are already beginning to show. “Is that bad? That looks bad?”

“Absolutely not. Ribs are supposed to look like that.” Janus jokes. Virgil does not find it funny in the slightest. He sighs. “You’ll be fine. Don’t worry. I’ve seen worse than this.”

“You have?”

“Yeah. The roommate I mentioned. He gets into quite a few scrapes. He’s a lot like us. Unabashedly himself.” Janus speaks gently pressing his fingers to the ribs as Remus had taught him. 

Virgil winces at the touch. “Maybe that’s not the best thing to be.”

“Don’t be an idiot, Virgil. Being myself is why you find me attractive.”

Virgil blushes, spluttering. “What??”

“It’s okay.” Janus smirks. “It’s why I find you attractive too.”

Virgil is practically gasping for air, the poor fellow. Janus pulls Virgil’s shirt back into place. He rises to stare into his savior’s eyes. “Well, I think you’ll be fine until Remus gets here. Until then, do you think I could have your number?”

The purple student gulps, nodding his head vigorously. He attempts to speak. His voice cracking. He pauses. And tries again. “Yes. Yeah. Um… okay.” He speaks quietly. 

Janus unlocks his phone. Handing it over, he leans in to watch as the student types in his number, trying his best not to smile from ear to ear. “Thank you for letting me help you, Virgil.” He whispers as his phone is returned to him. Taking it back, he lightly lifts Virgil’s hand to his lips. Kissing the back of his fingers. “I think you’ve just helped me write my paper.”

awesome people to tag: @stop-it-anxiety @rainboots-are-for-snobs @hexatrash @ollyollyoxinfree @battlebunnyteardropsinthesun @leiasolo77

[tothestanders]

Only the Good Die Young

Summary:  Patton has a surprisingly heartfelt conversation with his murderer

Warnings: major character death (obviously). No sides meant to be unsympathetic

Word count: 1268

Read on AO3 here

Remus sauntered along the riverbank, head lolling from side to side. Upstream, the water shone turquoise in the midmorning sun, its happy babbling echoing off stones in the shallows. The scene made him want to vomit. He looked on with glee as it transformed into something far grimmer where the water flowed past him.

Limpid blue melted into boiling sludge, bubbles rushing to the surface and bursting into clouds of noxious fumes. Dead fish churned in the rapids, the babbling turning to shrieks that sent flocks of birds into the sky. Remus grinned at the turmoil, toothy smile expanding until his face was nothing but a gleaming maw. He was still admiring his handiwork when a shouting came from nearby.

“Hey! Anyone there? Do you need help? I’m coming, just hold on!” came the voice, closer now.

A small figure in overalls came barreling out of the woods. Remus tilted his head, eyes gleaming. A lazy finger came up to point at the person. Almost as an afterthought, he dragged the finger sideways. It was amusing how they went flying, like they’d been tugged by an invisible string. Into the river they went with a splash.

Remus let out a whoop. The body would tumble past him in a second, probably already bloodied from the rocks. Heck, probably still alive! Several moments of passed in eager anticipation, but no body appeared. Huh.

He approached the spot where the person had gone under. Sure enough, there floated a man, head bobbing just beneath the surface. His foot must have gotten trapped by a rock and stuck there until he’d drowned. Normally that sort of death was a little pedestrian for Remus’s tastes, but the trusty stream made it interesting enough. Black muck filled the corpse’s mouth and ears, oozing in and out like someone squeezing a ketchup bottle.

Remus reached down and poked the thing’s forehead. At once, a cyan mist appeared above the water. It shaped into a nebulous silhouette, only the head defined enough to be recognizable as the body below. Though cracked glasses still perched on the body’s nose, the spirit wore none.

It noticed Remus and recoiled. “Oh, hi! Hi there?” The man’s eyes darted around Remus’s face. “Sorry, I’m not totally sure where to look. You don’t appear to, uh, have eyes?” Remus tried and failed to blink in confusion. Right! He considered leaving his face as is, but finally he let the proper features melt back into place.

The spirit grimaced during the transformation, looking away until it was over. Then he asked bluntly, “Did you kill me?”

“Yep! I’ll resurrect you if you want. But then I’ll just kill you again. Maybe with snake venom this time! Do you know what happens if a stake bites you? Basically – ”

“Ah, no! That’s okay, I’ll just stay dead. Thanks for offering though.” The spirit smiled feebly.

“Bummer. Well whatever, see ya never.” Remus rose to leave, but the spirit reached forward with misty arms, expression panicked.

“Wait! Aren’t you taking me with you?”

“Nope. Not interested in the ferrying business. I’m more about the bing bang boom!” Remus threw out his hands in an exploding motion.

“Oh…you mean killing? You like doing it?”

“Yeah, ’course. What could be more fun than watching good stuff turn to rot?”

“What? Plenty of things! I mean, good stuff can be really rare, and that makes it all the more precious. Dontcha think?”

“If good stuff is rare, then opportunities to kill good stuff are also rare, therefore killing good stuff is precious! Boom, logic-ed ya.” Remus grinned.

The spirit breathed a laugh. “I’m not sure that’s how it works, kiddo. I’m Patton, by the way, though I guess you already knew that.”

“Why would I know your name?” Remus asked.

Patton’s brow furrowed. “Because you killed me. That means I was a name on your list, and now, well.” Patton glanced at the putrefying body floating below him.

Oh, this was a treat. “Uh-huh, so you think your death was some assignment by divine providence or whatever?”

“Wasn’t it?” Patton replied hesitantly. He looked away, face falling into something pained and tragic. “I’m not mad about it or anything. I get it. I wasn’t a good enough person, and bad people face consequences. Guess I haven’t even really started facing the big consequences, huh?” Patton’s arms clutched tightly around the vague shape of his torso.

“The big consequences? You’re talking about hell?” Remus asked incredulously. Patton really had no idea why Remus had killed him. He strained to hear as Patton’s voice dropped to a near whisper.

“Yes. I know I deserve it, just…is it okay if I don’t go just yet? If you give me – uh, directions? – I promise I’ll go on my own. Really, I will!” Patton closed his eyes. “I’d just like to soak up a few more moments under the sun.”

Remus stared at the cyan blob in front of him. Normally he never spoke to the things – plants, animals, people – that he killed. Some fatal mayhem and then he was gone. He had more important things to do than chat with the dead, after all.

“…Look. You wanna know the real reason I killed you?” Remus asked, sighing through his nose. “And here’s a hint: it’s not because you were on some ‘eternal damnation’ list.”

Patton sniffled, a few teardrops falling when he opened his eyes to look at Remus, who sighed again.

“It’s because you were yelling. Well, not that you were yelling, but what you were yelling. You were coming to help cause you heard screaming, right?”

Patton swallowed. “Yeah. Was that you?”

“Nope. It was the stream. It shrieks when I get close, same way it turns into a biohazard. Point is, I killed you cause I could tell right of the bat that you were good. Kind, selfless, moral, whatever. And I kill good stuff. It’s fun, like a game.”

Patton blinked rapidly. Remus could practically see the gears turning in his mind. “So…I wasn’t destined to die today or anything?”

“Nope.”

“And you killed me…because I’m good? Not broken or defective or bad?” Patton’s earnest gaze would’ve made Remus’s heart ache, if he could care about people.

“No. Geez, man. You need to lighten up. At this rate you’ll bring everybody down the second you get where you’re going. No that they’d probably care; the fuddy duddies up there get off on bullshit like ‘love’ and ‘friendship.’ Dull or what?”

“Up there?” Patton broke out into a hopeful smile. It was disgustingly wholesome.

“Yeah sure, you’ll fit right in with that crowd. Speaking of, how about you get going?” he replied dismissively.

Patton’s face was scrunching and unscrunching in what Remus provisionally identified as an expression of joy. “Yes, great idea! Oh, wow. Hey, wait!”

Remus turned back from where he’d started to leave. Patton made a motion like he wanted to fiddle with his sleeves, except he no longer had any. “You might think it’s ‘BS,’ but truly, thank you. For being my friend today. I really needed one, ha.”

Remus stared, meeting Patton’s gaze for several long moments. Finally, he broke the look to rub the back of his neck. “Uh-huh. It is BS, but – you’re welcome. And thanks, too.”

With one last sunny smile, the mist that was Patton vanished into the sky. Remus felt an odd ache in his chest. When a frog hopped into his vision, he tossed it into the river – like he’d tossed Patton. After a few moments, Remus lifted the frog out again and watched it hop away.

[mittensmorgul]

Hi, sorry to bother you, but what do you make of all the biblical symbols. There's the snake (obviously the real life snake and there's one on the wall behind Cas in the diner), Jack even brought it into the bunker (not saying the bunker is paradise lol) and then the Judas Iscariot-ish poisonous kiss on the cheek. Does that mean something?

hey hi, you’re definitely not a bother. :D

I don’t know if I’m the best person to ask about religious symbolism, for several reasons. I usually try to avoid making “real world Religion” comparisons to Supernatural canon, because so much of their use of this symbolism is only tangentially related to real-world meanings and purposes for these symbols, you know? So I try to look at them in the context Supernatural is using them, rather than how we would look at them in reality.

I hope that makes sense, because this is such a potentially touchy topic. So I’ll do my best to attempt to explain my understanding within Supernatural canon, and not mix it up too heavily with actual real-world biblical lore, because that’s a big enough can of worms on its own. (cue biblical scholar fisticuffs in three, two...) :P

This entire episode seemed to have been framed around various snake-related mythologies, not just from the bible. The title Ouroboros is a depiction of a snake eating its own tail in a circle, and a quick scan of the wikipedia article on it shows the diverse origins of this mythological symbol: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ouroboros. There’s a lot going on here, but all of it is snakey.

Then we have a gorgon for our MotW. The most famous gorgon we know of is Medusa, but this gorgon didn’t have snakes for hair, but his pet Felix (which is the snake Jack brought back to the bunker). But again, the mythology is complicated and has shifted over time: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gorgon

The gorgon’s name was Noah Ophius, and Ophius means “snake.”

Dean references Clash of the Titans to explain his knowledge of the gorgon, but the knowledge he actually relates... doesn’t actually apply to a gorgon, but to a hydra. It’s not a gorgon that grows back more heads when it’s beheaded, but the hydra, which is also a snake-like creature, but definitely not a gorgon.

Also in this episode, Felix the snake shed his skin-- a reminder that this is how snakes grow, by sloughing off and discarding the old layer to reveal the new layer beneath. Kind of like Jack has been doing as he’s grown, in a metaphorical fashion.

And we know some snakes are venomous, like our gorgon monster, but poor lil Felix is just an innocent lil beauty of a corn snake. Not a drop of venom in him. I did find it hilarious that the show opened in Raton, New Mexico, because it vaguely looks like “Rat town,” and the snake monster is eating the residents, and rats are the standard fare for many snakes-- including Felix the corn snake (aka the red rat snake).

Strangely enough, a close relative of the red rat snake is the black rat snake, and the egg-eating black snakes of Africa from which the parable of the chicken and the black snake that the gorgon told Jack in this episode derived.

But I’d venture to suggest that all of them have brought potential danger into the bunker, you know?

They knowingly brought Dean into the bunker even though Michael was locked in his brain fridge and could’ve theoretically escaped at any time. They knowingly brought Michael himself, while possessing Dean, into the bunker in 14.10. They unwittingly brought some of Michael’s monsters into the bunker in the same episode. They brought Jack into the bunker back in the beginning of s13 not knowing if he was gonna go evil and explode at any moment. They brought all the AU hunters through the rift in s13, even knowing that doing so was incredibly dangerous to the Natural Order (Billie warned them not to mess with the AU’s because the cosmic house of cards was highly unstable), but again, it was supposed to be a temporary place of refuge for them to regroup and plan a more direct attack on Michael in their own world, before Michael himself came here instead.

So yeah, there’s a lot of circles closing, a lot of snake imagery (both positive and negative, thanks to Felix being a good bean and not an inherently evil thing like his former owner).

On to the Judas Kiss. Let’s look at Luke 22:47-48:

While he was still speaking a crowd came up, and the man who was called Judas, one of the Twelve, was leading them. He approached Jesus to kiss him, but Jesus asked him, "Judas, are you betraying the Son of Man with a kiss?"

This was how Judas “identified” Jesus to the Romans, so he could be captured. But some biblical scholars believe that this wasn’t a betrayal at all, but more of an understanding between the two that this was something that needed to be done. Essentially the ultimate act of “killing what you love” for the salvation of the rest of the world.

Remind you of anyone? Of Cas sacrificing himself to the Empty in Jack’s place? Of Dean wanting everyone to agree to let him go into the Ma’lak box to save them all from Michael? Of Sam back in 5.22 knowing the only way to stop the apocalypse was for him to say yes to Lucifer and fling himself into the cage, or even the trials he undertook in s8 to close the gates of Hell? Of Jack willing to burn up his own soul in order to kill Michael and thereby save the world?

It’s all fun and games until someone chokes on a boiled egg... or on the equivalent of all the souls in Purgatory... >.>

This theme of sacrifice is finally getting a blatantly toxic label here, I guess? I don’t know what it means going forward, but the show has been thematically denouncing this sort of “all in for death” play for a while now, and this is about as blatant a “Danger Poison” label as the act has been given yet.

And then we have one final bit of snakey imagery-- the vortex of Michael’s grace spinning in a circle above Jack’s head as he burned it off from an ouroboros of malice into a lil wispy snake that he eventually inhaled and apparently assimilated into his own being. I found it fascinating that he just burned off the vast majority of that grace cloud until he was left with what was apparently just the “power pack of grace” he needed for himself, and the rest had apparently been “the Persona of Michael.”

Heck I don’t even know what else to write about any of this, and I don’t think very much of it was actually biblical, and I didn’t even touch on the “letting the snake into the garden” thing, because I feel like the show already dealt with that during the Gadreel arc in s9. And heck if that wasn’t letting the serpent into the garden, right?

[kelyon]

Golden Cuffs 15: The Blood

Rumbelle Dark Castle BDSM AU

Read on AO3

After Belle gets over her sickness, they deal with everything that happened in healthy (and unhealthy) ways.

Trigger warning for semi-consensual violence, anger and (believe it or not) blood. But this chapter also has a moderately happy ending! 

Belle opened her eyes and didn’t want to die. This was a tremendous improvement over the day before. Lying in the narrow bed in the putrid green room, Belle breathed through her nose and rejoiced. She stretched her arms out and her muscles did not ache, her bones did not tremble with fever. She sat up and rubbed her face, finding no grimy residue of sickness.

“I’m well,” she spoke aloud, and her voice was clear and strong. Rumpelstiltskin’s potion had worked. In only one night, she was cured!

But her smile faded when she remembered everything else that had happened last night. The price for this magic had been a orgasm Belle hadn’t wanted to have. Rumpelstiltskin had made her come when she had been too weak to resist. She had agreed to the magic, agreed to the price--but during the act she had faltered. It had hurt her to come and she had asked Rumpelstiltskin to stop, but he hadn’t heard her. He hadn’t stopped.

He had left to make the cure thinking he had pleasured her. Had Belle been wrong to correct him?

But he always wanted to know what she felt, what she wanted, what she liked or hated. She had hated being sick. And she had hated being pleasured. And she had hated how Rumpelstiltskin had thought more about her cunt than any other part of her.

And when she had told him, after it was all done, when she told him that she hadn’t liked what he’d made her body do… That was when he had frightened her. His anger had been palpable, but he had done nothing. The danger of the Dark One was always in his stillness--like a snake coiled or a bowstring drawn back, ready to attack but not there yet.

He hadn’t hurt her last night, even when rage had steamed off of him like mist from a poisonous swamp. He hadn’t hurt her, even though he had wanted to. Did he still want to? Was he just waiting for her to get well before he did it?

His rage would come, Belle knew. The bow would shoot, the snake let loose its venom. That wasn’t a question as far as Belle was concerned. For her, the only uncertainty would be when it would happen, and how she would bear it.

After all, it was her duty to bear it. She had to shoulder the burden of Rumpelstiltskin’s desires. She was the vessel for his lusts and his rages. She had to amuse him, entertain him, give him whatever he wanted to take from her. From the beginning, their deal had been that he could fuck her and hurt her and deny her anything. That was how it had always been. Why should anything change now?

Belle got up out of the bed, thankful that she had the strength to stand. She picked her robe up off the floor and wrapped it around her. She was as dressed as she would ever be. With nothing else to do, Belle made the bed she had slept in and looked around the ugly green room.

She had never been in this room before. It was a simple space, plain. The pale green walls were unadorned, the rug on the floor threadbare. The furniture was cheap and rickety. All major items--the bed, a chest of drawers and a wash stand--were all clearly made in different styles of different materials, but all three were painted the same nauseating green as the walls. Who was important enough to merit their own room, but not worthy of having a space that was pleasant to live in? Perhaps this was the chamber for a governess or a housekeeper, certainly no one of any great honor.

Belle walked over to the windows and tried to open the curtains. They would not pull and when Belle examined them more closely, she found that the bottom of the curtains had been nailed into the wooden window frames. So many rooms in the castle always had the curtains drawn. Were they all nailed in? Was an enchantment not enough to ensure complete darkness? Did Rumpelstiltskin hate the light much that he was unwilling to take a chance?

At least Belle was able to peek out through the sides of the curtains. Through a narrow strip of light, she caught a glimpse of snow-covered mountains and an overcast sky. Patches of blue peeked through the clouds, just as Belle peeked through the curtains. She smiled when she saw those spots of blue. They were hope in the midst of despair.

The doorknob turned.

Heart racing, Belle dashed to the center of the room and fell to her knees. She placed her hands on either side of her on the floor and kept her head bowed. As Rumpelstiltskin entered the room, she could only see his boots--the scaled gray ones that laced up the front.

He leaned against the bed with one ankle crossed over the other foot, observing her. He didn’t speak.

On the floor, Belle dug her fingernails into her palms. Should she go to him? Crawl over and kiss his boots? Would he want her to beg for mercy? Or would he not want her to move? She didn’t dare look up, didn’t want to see the expression on his face.

Belle made herself breathe through her fear. She made herself wait. She let Rumpelstiltskin make the first move.

After an interminable silence, he uncrossed his legs and spoke. “Do you have anything you want to say?” His voice was low and serious.

Slowly, Belle raised her head but kept her eyes lowered. She couldn’t make herself look at him. Not yet. “I feel much better, Rumpelstiltskin. Your cure worked wonders.”

“Would you say it was worth the price?”

Belle flinched at the snarl that was his last word. She breathed. She forced herself to relax. “Rumpelstiltskin--,” she began, but he cut her off.

“Go to your cell,” he snapped.

The cuffs yanked her to her feet and pulled her through the castle so quickly she had to run to keep up with them. The pull didn’t stop at the cell door. The cuffs dragged her to the far wall and locked her into the stone with her hands so high above her head she had to stand on her tiptoes. Belle’s back was to the door, her body pressed against the wall.

She let out a shaky breath. Then another. This was new. Rumpelstiltskin had never hurt her in the cell before. Pain games were usually for the dining room, after he had taken tea. That was when it amused him to make up a reason to hurt her.

But this wasn’t a game, was it? His anger wasn’t a pretense this time. He didn’t want to hurt her because it was fun. In this moment, Belle knew, Rumpelstiltskin had much darker motives.

Behind her, she heard his footsteps enter the room. This time she didn’t wait for him to speak.

“Should I beg you for mercy?” She wanted it to be a quip, wanted to show him she wasn’t afraid. But the words came out high-pitched and tremulous. She did not sound brave at all.

“It won’t help,” he said coldly. His hand reached around her waist and he untied the belt  of her robe. Without touching her body, he pulled the robe over Belle’s head, covering her hair but exposing her back and her ass.

Hooded now, the warmth of Belle’s breath quickly became stifling. She was isolated now, with the blue silk covering her eyes, muffling her hearing. Her world had shrunk to the two inches between her face and the cloth. Now she had even fewer ways of knowing Rumpelstiltskin, his moods or his temper. And with no way to gauge him, she had no hint of what her punishment would be. How bad it would be.

She thought she heard him take a few steps backwards. Was he looking at her body? Admiring the bruises and welts he’d already left there? Looking at the places on her that were still unmarked? Was he thinking of what he would do next? Or did he already know?

“Please,” she spoke up, disregarding his warning. “Please, Rumpelstiltskin just talk to--”

He cut her off, not with a word, but with a sharp burst of pain on her shoulder. Belle cried out at the shock of it, the bright fire that seared itself into her consciousness even before she registered the physical sensation.

He waited. Belle tried to imagine what he was waiting for. What did he want from her? What was he hitting her with? When would he hit her again? She breathed.

The second lash was worse than the first because she knew what to expect. A yelp ripped its way out of her throat and she felt the pain tears gather under her eyelids.

Again, he waited. Even now, he was letting her breathe. Of course, she knew that trick, didn’t she? Relax, because that will make the pain worse when it comes.

“Will you speak to me?” she whimpered. She could endure pain, but the silence, the unknowable mystery of this man--that was unbearable.

In answer, Rumpelstiltskin gave her another strike. This one she felt in the center of her back, a long, white-hot stripe against her spine.

After a few more blows, Belle heard a crack in the air above her head. That was when she realized what the new instrument he was using to hurt her. It was a whip. He was whipping her.

But still he would not speak.

“Please!” she shouted over the sound of her pain. “Please, Rumpelstiltskin! I just want--”

“Isn’t it obvious by now?” At last he broke his silence, lashing her to emphasize his words. “I don’t care about what you want!” The strikes came faster now, every word a new pain until Belle’s back was a wall of fire. “I-don’t-give-a-damn-about-you!”

Roughly, he pressed his body against her back. The sudden contact made Belle’s vision go white with pain and she sobbed. Her legs were useless but the cuffs held her up to the wall.

“You’re nothing!” Rumpelstiltskin moved to growl into the silk that covered her. “You are my thing!” He was hitting her ass now, bringing the flat of his hand down on the same spot over and over. “I bought you, you whore! And I will use you! And fuck you! And hurt you until I kill you if that’s what I want!” He pulled the crumpled robe away from Belle’s head, freeing her. “Do you understand?” He punctuated the last word with a strike, grabbing her reddened flesh, digging his claws into her skin.

When he pulled the robe away, it was as though Belle could truly breathe for the first time. The cold dungeon air was bracing, it shocked her awake. After a moment, she looked over at Rumpelstiltskin. He was staring at her. His whole body quivered but not a muscle moved on his face. He was looking at her. He had asked her a question. He wanted an answer.

“Yes,” she breathed. Then she breathed again. Every breath was another moment to clear her head. “Yes, I understand. I am your thing, Rumpelstiltskin.”  

His expression--still the coiled spring of rage--did not change. But, very slowly, the hand that gripped her flesh began to loosen. He reached between Belle’s legs and began to touch her.

Even she hadn’t realized how wet she was until his fingers swirled over her secret places. Belle sighed, delighted to feel anything that wasn’t pain.

Rumpelstiltskin sneered. “You slut,” he snarled. “You unconscionable harlot.”

Belle felt herself nodding distantly. Yes, it was unconscionable. It was incomprehensible. It was absurd that her body could turn pain into pleasure, that she could desire the man who hurt her. That even if she didn’t enjoy this treatment, she could still be aroused by it. It was madness, she thought numbly. Wasn’t that want he wanted from her?

He must want it, she thought with blurry reasoning. He was aroused by it too. Rumpelstiltskin kept his fingers inside her until he replaced them with his rigid cock. He slid into her from behind and pushed her against the wall.

“It’s impossible,” she heard him mutter as he slowly filled her. “Impossible.”

For few moments, he was gentle. Belle heard him gasp and almost whimper as he felt her wetness, her desire. His hands went up the wall next to her bound wrists. For a moment, both his thumbs rubbed against her forearms.

But then his hands clawed at her suddenly, grasping at her flesh, gripping her to the bone. His pace quickened, he went into her deep and fast. Belle pressed her cheek against the rough stone, bracing herself for what was to come.

Faster and harder he thrust, muttering vulgar oaths. He shouted and grunted like an animal desperate to escape from danger. He was not just thrusting but banging her into the stone, like he was trying to pulverize her bones through the might of his cock.

With a final push, he came inside her. The heat of his pleasure added to the heat of her pain. He rested against her body, pressing himself against her wounded back. Again, Belle heard his whimpering moans, the weak noises she would never have known him capable of if she weren’t exactly where she was now.

Rumpelstiltskin reached up to put his hands over hers. The cuffs released her and they fell together onto the dungeon floor, laying side by side. He curled around Belle and clutched her tightly.

“It’s unfair,” he muttered into her ear. “I take and I take and you give and you give. I give you nothing back.”  

Wordless, Belle shook her head. It was her duty to give. It was their deal.

They lay together. They breathed together. Together, on the cold dungeon floor, Belle and Rumpelstiltskin rested and recovered from all that had just happened.

Rumple was the first one to move. He pulled himself away from Belle and then stopped without standing up . “Oh gods,” he whispered. “Belle, what did I do to you?”

Her back on fire, Belle turned to look at him. She saw his face first, the horror that gripped him. His lips pressed together, his jaw clenched. His nostrils flared, she noticed, when he got upset. He was looking at something that upset him.

Belle lowered her gaze a little. Her mind was still foggy. The pain clouded over her thoughts and left only occasional patches of clear blue sky. Rumpelstiltskin was wearing a silvery gray shirt. It matched his boots but it didn’t suit him. The only appealing aspect of the shirt was the splotchy pattern of dark red. It caught her eye.

For a moment, that red was all she could focus on. It meant something, Belle thought. It was more than what it looked like.

It was blood.

Her blood. Belle blinked at the realization. Her blood was staining his shirt. She stared at it, while he stared at her. If she was looking at the aftermath, how horrible was what he saw?

Their eyes met. Rumpelstiltskin seemed just as shaken as she was. His mouth moved, but no sound came out. His eyes flickered, back and forth, between her face and her back. He didn’t notice his shirt.

“Rumple,” Belle mumbled. It was the most she could say. She pointed at his chest.

He looked down at himself and breathed in sharply. He tensed, Belle could see him tense, but then he shook his head. “It’s just laundry,” he said gently. “But you, oh Belle!”

He gathered her up into his arms and Belle found herself wrapped in a sky-blue blanket. It was the same color as the pillow he had given her on her first night.

Picking her up in his arms, Rumpelstiltskin carried Belle over to the bench and set her gently on her belly.

“I need to mend you,” he whispered. “Where is your washing cloth?”

Belle pointed to the ever-steaming cloth and Rumpelstiltskin went to fetch it. Laying her head on her pillow, Belle felt pleasantly numb. The pain was there, of course, but it was so much that it became nothing. It was just noise in her body, she could ignore it if she had to.

“Now hold still,” Rumpelstiltskin knelt beside her with the cloth in his hand. “This might sting a little.”

Wincing and squirming, she tried to obey him, but even the cuffs were useless at keeping her still. “That hurts!” Belle whimpered.

“Good!” he said loudly. “I mean--good that you’re telling me. It’s not good that it hurts--not this time, anyway.” He sighed, then went back to cleaning her wounds. “What did I do to you?”

Belle had no answer for him. In her clearing mind, all she had was more questions. “How is this different?” her voice was small as she asked. “Why is this worse than anything else?”

“How can you ask that?” Frowning, he showed her the steaming cloth. “What do you see here?”

“Blood,” Belle answered his question as well as her own. “You never made me bleed before.”

“And blood is sacred,” he said softly. “Blood is--more than I ever really expected to take from you, Belle.”

His hands stayed busy above her, but her back was such a mess of pain she couldn’t discern what was happening. On the floor at his feet there was a spool of his golden thread. He must have conjured it.

“What are you doing?” Belle asked him.

“Mending you, like I said.” He held up a length of thread between two fingers. From one end of the thread there hung a silver needle, curved as the crescent moon.

“You’re sewing me,” Belle said mostly to herself. At home, during the war, the doctors had trained the castle’s needlewomen to sew up the skin of wounded men. It was the cleanest way to keep the body whole, to keep the flesh from putrefying. They had used catgut--healing the flesh of men with the flesh of animals. “You’re sewing me with gold.”

“Magic gold, don’t forget.” His mouth quirked, it might have been a smile. “It will look beautiful in your body and help you heal more quickly.”

Belle had the image of her back, pale and bare and marked not by scars or red wounds, but by stirpes of Rumpelstiltskin’s gold. As though her body were a dress to be embroidered with his thread.

“Where did you learn how to sew?” Belle spoke to keep herself awake, and to keep him talking to her.

“Oh, I’m full of handy skills,” he brushed her hair back fondly. “As full as you are of questions today.”

“I just want you to talk to me,” she murmured. “I hate it when you’re silent.”

He rested his hand on her head for a moment. Then he took it away. “Thank you,” he cut the thread of the last stitch against his thumbnail. “For telling me what you want. I’ll try not to be so remote in the future.”

“You were angry,” Belle whispered. “At me.”

“I was angry at a good many things.” His eyes stayed focused on her wounds. “But you were the only thing I could hurt.” She felt something cold on her back and smelled medicinal herbs. “But also the only thing I could heal afterward.” He rubbed her flesh and for a moment the pain came into sharp relief--but then it disappeared entirely.   

“Am I healed now?”

“You will have scars,” he said. “Scars are important, they show what you’ve survived. I cannot take away what I did to you.” He swallowed. “I could take away the memory of today, of last night.”

“No,” Belle said quickly. “Please don’t ever erase my memories.”

“Not even if I grant you a wish every time I do?” There was a hint of impishness in his voice. He was joking with her, referring to the story in the book he had given her.

She shook her head, but with a slight smile. “Not even for that.”

He got up off the floor. “Can you sit? I’d like to hold you.”

Her back ached a little when she moved, but it was a warm glow of pain, not the sharp fire it had been. Rumpelstiltskin sat on the bench and Belle rested in his arms, still wrapped in the sky blue blanket. “You still have blood on your shirt.”

“Easily taken care of.” He moved one hand along his chest and the blood lifted off the silk. Drop by drop it hung in the air around their heads.

“That’s almost pretty,” Belle said. “If you forget what it’s made of.”

“Blood can be very beautiful,” Rumpelstiltskin said distantly. With a slow twirl of his finger he set the droplets to spinning. They looked like red stars or a model of the planets in orbit. “It’s precious.”

“Sacred, you said.”

“Yes,” he breathed. “It should not be given or taken lightly.” He shook his head. Belle could feel him underneath her, feel him coming back to himself. “I need to pay you,” he said in a much more normal voice.

Belle blinked. “Pay me? Pay me? But I am payment. I’m only here because of our deal.”

“I know that,” he rubbed her arm with his hand. “And stopping your war bought me much, but we didn’t bargain for blood.”

“Doesn’t that fall under hurting me?”

He shook his head. “It’s not enough. And it’s not just blood. Over and over, I have taken more than I gave you. I am in your debt and I must balance the scales.”  

He had said as much when they were on the floor: I take and I take and you give and you give. “But isn’t that how you like your deals?”

Again, he shook his head. “This deal is different. We must be fair to each other, you and I. I thought that saving a few thousand lives would be enough to earn a pretty girl, but you, my sweet, are more valuable than I had ever imagined. I cannot short-change you the price of all you give me. So what do you want?”

What did she want? What kind of a question was that? The Dark One could give her the sun and the moon if she was foolish enough to ask for them. What would he really give her? What would she value most to get from him?

“What do you offer?”

The drops of blood still hung in the air. Rumpelstiltskin brought them down in front of Belle. As she watched, they changed. The liquid became a solid. Droplets became pear-shaped. The surface went from rounded to faceted. Still red, the objects fell into Belle’s lap and she gathered them in her hands. Clinking together, the droplets felt like glass or stones.

“Are these rubies now?” she asked.

He nodded. “I could make a gem for every gift you give me. A ruby for each drop of blood, diamonds for your tears, pearls for my pleasure.”

“Those would have to be black pearls.” Belle said softly as she looked at the jewels in her hands. She had never been so close to so much wealth. But these rubies were her own blood given back to her. That didn’t feel like a proper gift. “When you came to my father’s study, that first day when we called you for help, you turned gold into dust.”

“And then back into gold, it’s a fun trick for parties.”

Belle couldn’t help but snort at him, the creature they had feared so long ago. “My point is,” she said, “what is made can be un-made. Rubies today could turn back into blood if you wanted to.”

“That’s true,” he said. “But I can turn anything into anything. No reward is completely safe.”

“What can you do with knowledge?”

“Knowledge?” he repeated.

Belle nodded. “Facts, the truth. Can your magic turn information into nonsense?”

“The only thing that can turn facts into nonsense is more facts, as any philosopher will tell you. But that is what you crave, Belle? The truth? The truth about what?”

“About you,” she blurted. Quickly, she added: “And about everything. You are so learned, Rumpelstiltskin, and you know more of what’s going on in the world than I ever will. If you want to give me something, give me knowledge, give me the right to ask you questions.”

“You ask questions all the time, little one.” He placed a teasing kiss on her hair.

“Well then this is your chance to make a game of it. You can deny me answers--or make me work for them. It doesn’t have to be all the time, just when I’ve excelled in some way, when I’ve given you exceptional pleasure.”

“Or when I’ve given you exceptional pain.”

“Yes,” Belle agreed. It would be easier for her to endure pain if she knew there was a reward at the end of it.

“So if I let you ask me a question today, will that make up for how I’ve treated you lately?”

“Only if you answer truthfully.”

“Oh, I’m always truthful,” he quipped. “If you ask nicely, I might even be persuaded to be honest.”

Belle grinned and nodded. “Honesty is preferred.”

“Very well then.” He took one of her hands and pressed his lips to the back of it. Belle felt her cuffs grow warm for a moment. “The deal is struck.”

They were silent for a moment. Belle contemplated the enormity of what they had just done. Their deal had changed.

Rumpelstiltskin spoke, softly. “What will your first question be, my dear?”

Belle closed her eyes. She had a question, but she didn’t want to ask it. She didn’t want to spoil the quiet peace that was between them now. She didn’t want to think that their had ever been a time when things had not been peaceful and kind between them She didn’t want to think that bad things could ever happen between them again.

But she knew that bad things could happen. And she knew she had to ask him about it. She had earned that right.

“Rumplestiltskin,” her voice was stronger than she had thought it would be, “would you ever rape me?”

Underneath her, his body tensed. His hands still held onto hers, but that hold had become a clenching grip. Belle heard the breath catch in his throat. It took him a moment, but eventually he spoke:

“It’s kind of you to think I haven’t already. What with one thing and another, this is not the life a maiden dreams of.”

“That doesn’t mean I am unwilling.”

“But last night… when you were ill…” he didn’t finish his thought but made a disgusted noise.

“When I was ill, I was ill. I didn’t want to do anything, even if it was something I would normally enjoy. It was a… special circumstance.”

He scoffed, “Special indeed.”

He hadn’t answered the question yet. Belle persisted. “So, knowing what you know now, what would you do in the future?”

He shook his head. “The future is a river with many streams, my Belle. It is well and good for me to sit here now, calm and rational, and say that I would never hurt you again. But in the moment? In the heat of passion? How am I to know what I would do? And if I say I don’t want to hurt you and then I do, then what is the value of you asking the question? It would make me a liar as well as… everything else.”

“Rumple,” Belle sat up to look at him. “Do you trust me?”

He blinked at her. “Trust you with what?”

“Do you trust my judgement? My understanding of myself? Do you trust that if you want to take me one hundred times, I will happily oblige you ninety-nine times?”

He looked at her, brow furrowed. “I… suppose I do, yes.”

“Will you allow me to trust you? May I trust in this moment, in this calmness, here and now? May I trust in the man I’m looking at right now?”

Ha gaped at her. “Why would you want to?”

“It doesn’t matter why,” Belle said. “I do. And if you, right now, tell me that you will never take me when I don’t want it, I will believe you.”

He shook his head, didn’t look at her. “You’re a fool, sweet Belle. A fool to trust in the Dark One.”

“I’ll only trust you if you tell me I may.”

His eyes found hers again. He looked at her, wary and puzzled, mystified. But deep in the back of his eyes, Belle saw a glimmer of light. Like a blue sky peeking out of darkened clouds, she saw hope in his eyes. Slowly, he spoke. “You may trust me, Belle,” he said. “You may trust that I will never rape you again.”

“Thank you,” she said. But she knew her words were not enough.

Unwrapping herself from the blanket, Belle got out of Rumpelstiltskin’s lap and knelt by the bench on the floor. He sat up when she did this, and Belle waited until his feet touched the floor before she moved.  

“Thank you,” she said again, before she bent down and kissed his boots.

[rana-capito]

blue, navy blue, i'm as blue as i can be, cause my steady boy said "all of them", one hundred something questiiiions

1: How tall or short do you wish you were?I’d take a couple more inches but like this is fine2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not)It would be so cool to have a snake…but a dog is also really good…3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?cool jackets are cool…for myself I like target man tshirts4: What was your favorite video game growing up?I had these Magic School Bus computer games that were truly excellent. there was one about whales and dolphins and one about rainforest animals5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:idk…the Majority of my thoughts are either very self-centered or just the song that it’s time to have in my head6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say?fuck idk. warning: occasional stupid bitch 7: What is your opinion on [insert person/thing here]?hmm! vague8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]I got sanguine on a quiz I took once and I like that because I like blood9: Are you ticklish?yeah, not Extremely tho10: Are you allergic to anything?guinea pigs, cats, pollen11: What’s your sexuality?i’m Gay12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?Tea13: Are you a cat or dog person?they are both good and i really like both…i’ll say dogs because i’ve been seeing a lot of very good ones lately + the cat allergy14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson?VAMPIRE15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber?I watch beckiejbrown a lot and I think she’s cool16: How tall are you?5'7"17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to?Benjamin..perhaps…but there’s too many bens so I guess I’ll just have to be Larl18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]between 144 and 150 pounds19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?eh…nah20: Do you like space or the ocean more?The ocean..has more animals in it21: Are you religious?non22: Pet peeves?when people call frogs venomous or spiders poisonous23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?diurnal…i like Sunshine24: Favorite constellation?i like cassiopeia she’s spiky25: Favorite star?uhhhh I don’t have one26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?i think they are..flexible?27: Any phobias or fears?MIRRORS IN THE DARK MIRRORS IN THE DARK scary. 28: Do you think global warming is real?yeah lol29: Do you believe in reincarnation?not really30: Favorite movie?hmmm. i liked inglorious basterds a lot but i’m mostly saying that because i can’t think of any movies that have made an especially big impression on me at the moment31: Do you get scared easily?..yes i’m sensitive32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?1 frog 2 tortoises 4 guinea pigs & a lot of fish33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]8/10 content is great but posting frequency is too spread out34: What is a color that calms you?green like my room at home35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?I want to go to like..australia. or some other place with cool and weird animals!36: Where were you born?atlanta :P37: What is your eye color?brown38: Introvert or extrovert?IntroVert39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?not really but i like to read things about them anyway40: Hugs or kisses?WHY not both41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?clarissa…so far away…an entire TIMEZONE42: Who is someone you love deeply?Antonie Hvan Leeuwenhoek43: Any piercings you want?maybe something extra on my ear?44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?they’re cool45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?i neiver have done so46: Talk about your crush, if you have one!sexy. very shapely calves. extremely good at calculus and physics and programming. 47: What is a sound you really hate?when my shoe scrapes on the sidewalk48: A sound you really love?the echoes from the main staircase in the mlc49: Can you do a backflip?no :(50: Can you do the splits?no51: Favorite actor and/or actress?i like..karla souza52: Favorite movie?this has been asked previously and i still don’t have a good answer. 53: How are you feeling right now?cool! kind of tired54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?uhh this color’s good55: When did you feel happiest?jeez idk that’s pretty hard to answer56: Something that calms you down?my green chair in my room at home57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]i do not58: What does your URL mean?it’s vaguely homestucky59: What three words describe you the most?cool. sexy. innovative.60: Do you believe in evolution?hell yeah61: What makes you unfollow a blog?content that i don’t like or no content for a long time62: What makes you follow a blog?content that i like63: Favorite kind of person:cool person64: Favorite animal(s):guinea pigs. orcas. cane toads. naked mole rats.65: Name three of your favorite blogs.teensplop.blogspot.com is my ultimate favorite blog ever. my favorite tumblrs are of like random people who i follow and i would feel weird @ing them66: Favorite emoticon:girl with carrots67: Favorite meme:bode was pretty good68: What is your MBTI personality type?i think i got infp when i took it69: What is your star sign?capricorn70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?i don’t have a dog :(71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?dark gray vneck from target and my Excellent jeans72: Post a selfie or two?i’ll do that..later73: Do you have platform shoes?no i’m tall74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?my blood type is A positive75: Can you do a front flip?into a pool or on a trampoline76: Do you like birds?hell yeah! i wanted to be an ornithologist in 6th grade and if that ended up being my life i would be satisfied and happy77: Do you like to swim?Yeah Put Me In The Water78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?hmm. i guess swimming? ice skating is very fun though. and it has to be the correct context of swimming like the water is clean and i can swoop around in it79: Something you wish didn’t exist:*****es80: Some thing you wish did exist:my huge future muscles81: Piercings you have?one in each earlobe82: Something you really enjoy doing:dancing in a loud bar83: Favorite person to talk to:different people have different good talking qualities but there is a special kind of conversation i can only hold with my sister84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?this sure is The Place For Fanart85: How many followers do you have?15086: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?hmm…i feel like yes but i would be very tired after87: Do your socks always match?almost always yes88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?i used to be able to but no longer89: What are your birthstones?i think turquoise?90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?something sneaky and timid and nocturnal91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?it has 5 smooth white petals and a smooth green stem and i was so into it for like some time in second grade92: A store you hate?urban outfitters93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?ideally zero94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?fly95: Do you like to wear camo?not particularly96: Winter or summer?summer for sure..i like Sunlight97: How long can you hold your breath for?i don’t feel like testing this rn98: Least favorite person?let’s say johnny rives99: Someone you look up to:my veterinarian cousin is cool100: A store you love?binders is pretty cool101: Favorite type of shoespumas 102: Where do you live?in a College Town103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why?no i love MEAT104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?star sapphires are pretty cool?105: Do you drink milk?on occasion106: Do you like bugs?yeah :)107: Do you like spiders?yeah :)108: Something you get paranoid about?people thinking i shouldn’t be in a place109: Can you draw:yeah i think so110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?nothing comes to mind111: A question you hate being asked?what kind of music do you like?112: Ever been bitten by a spider?maybe…i had this huge itchy leg bump the past few days that i think might have been from that113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?yah it’s nice114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?mmm sunny115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now:Antonie Hvan Leeuwenhoek116: Favorite cloud type:Ummm ones that are interestingly shaped! not just stratus. everything else is cool117: What color do you wish the sky was?blue is good118: Do you have freckles?yah119: Favorite thing about a person:do people like actually have an answer to this in mind120: Fruits or vegetables?VEGETABLES121: Something you want to do right now:eat dessert122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?mmm sky!123: Sweet or sour foods?sweet…124: Bright or dim lights?uhh depends on the mood125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature?…no?126: Something you hate about Tumblr:some of the discussions on here happen in really weird and negative ways but i’m pretty much never involved so whatever127: Something you love about Tumblr:lots of nice content128: What do you think about the least?i don’t fucking know since i’m not thinking about it129: What would you want written on your tombstone?something about science contributions maybe130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?i’m not in a really violent mood rn131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?nothing comes to mind132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?yeah133: Computer or TV?computer IS tv134: Do you like roller coasters?yeah :D135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness?sometimes…not recently136: Are your ears lobed or attached?lobed137: Do you believe in karma?eh138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?this really varies but like in the middle somewhere. not a 1 and not a 10 for sure139: What nicknames do you have/have had?sarah calls me em…that’s it140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?hmm sarah and i had an imaginary little sister named lucille and an imaginary dog named ruby141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?non142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?i try to be a good influence?143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?i like…giving ;)144: What makes you angryjohnny rives145: How many languages do you speak fluently?One146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?i’m a lesbian147: Are you androgynous?hmm i think i’ve reached that somewhat148: Favorite physical thing about yourself:i like..my feet149: Favorite thing about your personality:i try to…be nice150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person.julia clarissa sarah151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?i’m good staying here thank u152: Do you like BuzzFeed?it can be entertaining but i don’t think it’s good153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.]introduced by a mutual friend is the most basic explanation154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?yeah!155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?yah156: What embarrasses you?being in the gym157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:the gym158: Biggest lie you have ever told:i can’t say it here…it’s illegal159: How many people are you following?130160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?4,507161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?2162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?27,596 wow163: Last time you cried and why:thursday night and i have no Fucking clue164: Do you have long or short hair?short165: Longest your hair has ever been:i think it got past my boobs in the first semester of 9th grade166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?i don’t really have any religious affiliations at all so. neutral167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created?..yes? like i think it’s cool and stuff168: Do you like to wear makeup?Not like, regularly, but I like doing my 3am editorial looks169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds?No170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?mostly. i didn’t think Too Deeply

@shovelthefries

[terryblount]

Ancestors: The Humankind Odyssey Review

Video games have the potential to teach, excite, and make you see things in a different light or from a different perspective.  It’s one of the greatest things about the medium, but not too many of them ever really boil down to anything but mindless fun.  Ancestors: The Humankind Odyssey is a lot like modern games in some aspects, and in others, it’s something completely different and unique.  While it comes from one of the minds that brought us the Assassin’s Creed series, it is not that.  Ancestors is a survival game.  Well, actually, it’s THE survival game, telling the story of a primate and their clan in their struggle to survive, adapt, and evolve.

You create your own story

There really isn’t a story here, actually.  The story is the one you create.  Your adventures can range from the small triumphs of learning to use both of your hands to the bigger moments like the joy of childbirth and the advancement of your lineage.  Ancestors is a complex survival simulation, that doesn’t hold your hand and makes you think at every turn.  It allows you to weigh the costs of each and every action you make, just as you would were you the primate you are controlling.  Yet, it’s not a turn based game or a simulator, it’s a third person open world game.

Ancestors is a little bit overwhelming at first.  There’s really not much by the way of tutorials, even if you elect for the guided first play through. You are given a world to explore at your pace.  There are some pretty brutal rules at the onset.  Don’t get killed by predators, basically.  You can also die of starvation or thirst.  You can walk into an area where you become scared, fearful for your life, overwhelmed and frenzied.  You can get bitten by venomous snakes which clouds your vision and makes you weaker and slower.  You can break your limbs if you mistime a jump and fall from heights which makes you move much slower making it harder to climb or run away from predators.  Like other survival games, it’s the basics at first though.  You’ll learn to find food and water, where you can rest at, and what you can interact with.  The core building blocks will keep you from going hungry or thirsty and allow you to get rest so you can explore the world and navigate its dangers.

Ancestors can be a bit overwhelming in the opening hours

The beauty of Ancestors is that instead of a tutorial that walks you through the video game rules of finding water and food, you simply walk to a stream, cup your hands and gather water.  Or walk to a tree, examine it, pick a berry off of it, and eat it.  It’s all pretty natural and organic in the way that you learn the rules.  You are a basic primate at the onset of the game, a far cry from the evolutionary result you’ll become.  Ancestors is a game of small a-ha moments.  We’ve all seen the depiction of cavemen when they invent fire.  To modern day humans, we don’t even think about it.  But can you imagine what it’s like to discover something like that for the first time?  Ancestors has a lot of these moments and they’re absolutely great. There’s really not much instruction, you are just kind of guessing what to do, or thinking to yourself what would logically work in a given situation.  More often than not, when you do stumble across an important gameplay mechanic you will then get a tutorial tip from the developers on why it’s important and how to do it.  But not before you find it in most instances.  You’ll just use minimal on screen prompts to figure everything out for the most part.

For instance, as you get a little ways into a generational playthrough, you’ll unlock the ability to switch an item between your left and right hands.  While it doesn’t sound like a big deal, it’s what is basically the road to crafting and manipulating objects.  I literally found myself in a spot where I had a coconut in one hand and a rock in the other and a light bulb went off where I thought “I’ve got it, I’ll smash them together.” It seems dumb, and it might sound dumb, but it was a moment, a milestone, a new source of food.  I could climb the trees, above the predators on the ground (like the boars and tigers) and pluck coconuts for sustenance without much risk.  The tree wasn’t far from the cave either.  I could easily go back to our clan’s makeshift base without much danger, get the kids and bring them out to get more coconuts.  In the process I would be teaching future generations to survive as well.

I took to the trees to avoid predators and make it back to the base to meet my clan

Because Ancestors isn’t just about a single character.  You’re controlling a clan and all that goes with that.  The primate you start out with will die.  Whether that’s from old age or from a Saber Tooth Tiger tracking you down.    Your job is to survive, procreate, teach your children skills that they will improve upon and pass down to their kids… and so on.  This is where the video game systems definitely come into play.  Once you start figuring this stuff out, Ancestors does get a bit more transparent, but no less fun as there are still plenty of surprises in store.  However, you’ll soon realize that your goal is to push forward, multiple generations, locking in the skills and abilities that you’ve learned out in the world.  There are few different systems at play here.  The first is a series of challenges that give you somewhat of a goal.  These require that you perform different actions.  This can be finding and using certain tools and items or combinations.  There are abilities unlocked through exploration. And there are expansionary goals which consist of things like finding new clan members to join you out in the world or intimidating predators before they attack you among many others.  These challenges along with using your senses out in the world to learn more about it by finding new items, locations, friends and foes, will lead you to become more capable.  Again, this isn’t a checklist of things to do, rather something that you see as a milestone AFTER you’ve done it.

You’ll see small immediate improvements, but your goal is pass traits and abilities onto your kids

It is baby steps however.  You’ll see little things at first, like small improvements to dexterity or your memory.  These will allow you to remember the locations of items you previously found or use items differently.  You’ll learn to groom your clan mates, bond with the opposite sex and make babies.  You’ll learn that you need to teach these babies how to do the things that are necessary to survive and you’ll ultimately continue to build and build through each generation.  However, there is a fail state in the game.  Your clan is finite.  As mentioned, time or predators can thin out your ranks so its important to make children and progress the game.  The more children you’ve created the more points or traits you can lock in for future generations.  You’ve got to pair males with female that aren’t related to one another.  You’ve got to give them a good back rub and couple up before you can invite them to your bed of leaves to do the duty (assuming their fertile) and you’ll have a child.  These children can make more children and they can mate with others and so on and so forth.  The more children you have the more upgrade points you can earn by taking them out into the world to learn.

Over time, you’ll see the evolutionary process at play.  The things that were once milestones are commonplace.  Things you once thought were a challenge become easier as you become better equipped to survive in the harsh conditions.  That said, the progression can be incredibly slow in this game.  While the developers urge players to play their own way and that there is no right way to play Ancestors, this does mean that different people are going to get different things out of it.  I could see some people picking this game up out of curiosity or word of mouth and then putting it down an hour or two later.  There are many things to learn at the onset, and you kind of have to buy in or have that first a-ha moment for the game to really sink its teeth in.  Once it does though, it’s one that will make you think.  Whether that’s trying to solve specific problems for your clan or trying to do things you know that are necessary to survive that you haven’t quite figured out, you’ll search for these answers.  Once you have that moment, you’ll likely be hooked though.  Ancestors makes you think about what life was like for early primates and the evolutionary process.  It uses gameplay in unique ways that feels incredibly rewarding at spots and slow and tedious at others (kind of like real life).

Ancestors impressed in the way it makes you think about solutions to problems

Ancestors is not without its flaws.  Since the game is releasing on PC first, there is only one way to play this game at the moment and that’s going to be on the Epic Games Store.  That might be a deal-breaker for some, but even if it isn’t there are some other things that’ll need to be overlooked as well.  The controls of the game are one of the major things that do hold the game back.  Ancestors doesn’t really feel that great to play from a controls standpoint.  Swinging from tress and climbing around the world should be more fun than it actually is in the game.  Where you might have been able to eek some enjoyment out of the game in the more mundane moments, a lot of the controller input gameplay from moving around the world to “fighting” with predators doesn’t feel great.  Traveral and climbining, running and jumping, it all feels sluggish and your prone to just being caught on the geometry when navigating the world.  And, it’s a PC exclusive which tells you up front that it was designed to be played with a controller.  You’ll likely need it because there are some timing based puzzles that don’t feel that great on a keyboard.

While it’s also understandable why there have been a lot of considerations made to let players figure it out on their own, this can also be incredibly frustrating when the first time you fire up the game you fall from a tree and break your leg or get poisoned and aren’t able to see anything.  Since there’s really no descriptions to help you other than hey you need something to cure poison, this aspect can also be frustrating.  There’s an interesting problem here with this game and Panache Games decided that less is more when it comes to help and explanation and have made a pretty big bet that people will have a better experience when figuring it all out on their own.  I ended up loving my time with Ancestors and I plan to play a lot more of the game, but I was did not feel this way when I first started playing.  It felt like the obscurity of the game’s rules were too much to overcome and unstructured nature of the game made it feel like most of what I was doing was a waste.  So long as you can let go of the standard ways that you think about rules, missions, and stories, there’s some really incredible stuff here that crosses some boundaries when talking about games as a medium.  Many games evoke emotions and can give you a sense of accomplishment for your completed tasks.  Not many in recent memory have I played that did it like this one.  It’s a refreshing take on a genre that’s been done to death in recent years.

The Verdict

Ancestors is likely going to be a polarizing game, but it’s something so out of the ordinary than what you’ve come accustomed to in either the survival or third person open world genre, that it’s worth a look.

Ancestors: The Humankind Odyssey Review published first on https://touchgen.tumblr.com/

[renegadesepiida]

From February 3 until February 11 another King of the Hammers race week made Johnson Valley an enormous cloud of dust. I’d heard about the craziness of this event since I arrived in the Southern California desert five months ago. That was the time of innocence, thinking there was no possible way our country would take the turn that it has, and out here I was definitely in the minority.

While I don’t want to get too wrapped up in politics, it does have an influence on the world we live in and of course how people see each other. It is a shame, which is why I prefer to keep traveling, to experience every culture, and to understand it with respect. I looked at this event as a perfect way to do just that, understand and respect why these people feel this way.

The first thing I should do is to explain what King of the Hammers is. How my boss explained it to me and just so everyone knows these are the words coming out of a government park institution leader whose family all grew up in this area (so don’t hate me if you’re offended by the next sentence). “It’s a shit-ton of drunk rednecks who come out here with all their heavy machinery to tear up the desert.” Honestly, after hearing that I was way more terrified of participating than I was at the actual event. I expected super rowdy drunk off their ass spectators and racers on motorcycles, quads, and every other tricked out ATVs (all-terrain vehicles) you could possibly think of. There were plenty of tricked out vehicles, which were soooooo awesome to watch. I originally thought the vast majority of people were extremely kind and were just there for fun. In fact, there weren’t people just from that area, but all over the country and even the world. It was truly an international event with people driving from Canada, flying from England, Australia, and even China (along with many others).

I couldn’t believe some of these rigs, they cost upwards of hundreds of thousands of dollars, crazy. I could never save up money for that, it’s the racers business, and if this event is anything to go by, business was good.

BOOTH DUTY

For my part, I was working with Art, the Mojave Desert Park Ranger (the only one), to educate the public on the native flora and fauna out in the desert and show them that they should protect it. A lot of the education was geared towards kids, but the teens and adults also got involved with questions and wanting to hold the animals Art brought. All the animals were rescues, or in the case of the baby desert tortoise, born and raised in captivity.

In the case of the desert tortoise, which is an endangered species, we told the people that, should they want a pet tortoise, to adopt one from a shelter. When they are taken out of the wild and interact with humans they develop a respiratory condition that can cause them to die around 15, the female breeding age, and will be passed to their offspring. Therefore, none of them can ever be returned to the wild. And this is especially sad because they can normally live for over a hundred years, and could be passed down through human generations. But they might be picked up, exposed and after a few years the people who took them get tired of looking after them and leave them back out in the desert where, soon enough, they die.

BTW: It’s actually illegal to take them, even really to interact with tortoises at all (except if they are on a road, then you can pick them up, keeping them low to the ground, and move them off in the direct they were originally going.) Also if you see any broken shells DO NOT COLLECT, scientists need to be able to see that that area is a tortoise habitat, otherwise people may try to build on it, displacing many more animals.

PSA… Anyways…

We also passed out maps of much of the land for free, don’t want anyone to get lost, and then it would also help them know where and where not to ride their ATVs. Everyone was extremely grateful for all of this information, and they were happy that the BLM (Bureau of Land Management – who I work for along with ACE – American Conservation Experience) was out getting involved with the public. A government branch that actually cares about the environment and the people – crazy!

Almost everyone who came by our booth really opened up to us: telling us where they are from, what they like to do for fun, and how they feel about the entire environment we were currently in. It’s interesting to see how people will act when you get them talking.

Along with the tortoise we also had a dead, stuffed raven, to explain how they eat the baby tortoises (first pecking through the soft underbelly of the shell, and then one they develop harder shells pick them up, bring them to telephone wires and then drop the tortoises on the rocks to break them – smart animals). Other than the tortoise, the living animals were as follows:

A false widow – looks like a black widow but not venomous and very common.

A desert hairy scorpion – also big (ladies are larger and almost white – glow in the dark with a black light, males are smaller and darker) and a little venomous, but not dangerous unless you’re allergic, like bees. And also very common here, shake out your shoes and jackets, really anything you left on the ground while camping.

A chuckwalla – lizard who thrives in 90+ temperature, with loose skin flaps on its sides so when it runs between rocks it can blow itself up like a balloon to keep predators from yanking it out and the detachable tail.

A California king snake – black and white (sometimes brown or red too, depending on the region) snake who eats all the other animals (including rattlesnakes) so the top predator that is nice to people and keeps us all safe and happy.

The desert may seem empty, but it’s sooooo not.

I spent most of the time with a baby northern alligator lizard, that Art saved to feed to his king snake, who loved my body heat and crawled up my sleeves and hung out under my shirt collar for hours on end. I named it Geoffery Carlile, and didn’t change it when I found out it was female; the name was too good. So now I have a pet/buddy.

OTHER SHIT

We did have a couple less than sober people come by, especially because the vast majority of adult (young to old) were carrying around cans of beer in cozies. But with thousands of people passing over the week there was only one man (probably in his late 50’s or 60’s) who passed celebrating Trump’s idea of shutting down the BLM, and all the ideas he had for tearing down all the governmental structures. What that man probably didn’t know is that, without the BLM Johnson Valley would be taken over by the military and, thus, they could never access it, which would mean no more off-roading. So, YOU’RE WELCOME.

Also btw, that is not me being ok with how much of the land and habitats the off-roaders are messing up with all this crazy behavior. Just trying to appeal to what they care about.

  TIME TO ESCAPE

Because standing/sitting in a booth all day is boring as shit, there were times when I would take a walk to the bathroom and take a longer way back, passing the other stalls and the stages. Almost none of the vendors were selling their products because, as I later learned, the man who puts this on every year charges through the nose for placement, and makes the vendor give him a percentage of whatever they sell. By the end, he’s basically pocketing around a million dollars a year.

But, to the casual fan, this stuff doesn’t have too much of an effect. The booths instead have people sign up through email, which gives them an opportunity to win a $500 credit with their company, spin a wheel, and get free little prizes (like hats, cozies, stickers, etc.). While $500 might sound like a decent amount, most of the products cost over a thousand dollars, so good if you are in the market for stuff like what they sell, but worthless if not.

On Thursday, the day before the final 200-mile car race, one of the fire station volunteers (who also volunteers for the BLM) offered to help me escape the monotony of the booth for a while. I took him up on the offer, we climbed into his jeep and showed me two of the coolest parts of the racetrack: chocolate thunder and the waterfall.

Since I am more comfortable in heels, rather than flat shoes (completely serious) I wore my high heeled boots every day, this made it more impressive (?) to onlookers when I jumped out of the jeep at chocolate thunder and walked through the steep sand hill and over the rocks one handed. The lizard was hanging out in my sleeve still and I didn’t want her shaken up too much. When we arrived we could see that one of the customized jeeps had flipped and the crew was trying to set it right so they could finish the race. The canyon was very steep and rocky and we watched long enough for me to take several pictures and videos of the jeep being righted and passed a couple times.

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The second location was “the waterfall” which had a straight three feet rock that both cars and motorbikes had to navigate both up and down, depending on the race direction. I only got to see the cars going down, but that was pretty awesome. Took some pictures and more videos (btw they have cameras along the track and in helicopters overhead so they can film and live stream the entire race) and my favorite was when one car drove through it like it was nothing, almost on the tail of another car and then after getting through the rocky bit slammed on the gas speeding up on the sand. Vroom Vroom motherfucker

            Watching the whole race filled me with adrenaline; I just wanted to jump on a bike or into a car and speed over all obstacles. Wouldn’t even think twice, as long as the owner wouldn’t care if I messed up the vehicle… no fear. Didn’t get to, though.

Overall, the experience was generally enjoyable and I’m glad I got to talk to groups of people that I would normally clash with. And, as it is Valentine’s Day I wish love and understanding to all people of the world, wouldn’t that be great?

  Happy Valentine’s Day and be safe on all your adventures.

Long Live the Hammer King From February 3 until February 11 another King of the Hammers race week made Johnson Valley…