#i usually eat more the week leading up to my period

[venus-haze]

Watch Honey Drip, Can't Keep Away (Soldier Boy x Reader)

Summary: America’s golden son can't keep his eyes off of you, almost like he wants to devour you whole...or something like that.

Note: Female reader, but no descriptors are used. This is kind of in the same universe as She’s Out To Please, She Pouts Her Best. I know generally men in the ‘40s, let alone Soldier Boy of all people, wouldn’t really consider going down on a woman, but it’s my fic and I get to decide he eats out. Do not interact if you’re under 18 or post thinspo/ED content.

Word count: 2k

Warnings: Period typical misogyny, power imbalance. Explicit sexual content involving masturbation and oral sex (f. receiving). Do not interact if you’re under 18.

“Which city are we going to next?” you asked, finally comfortable in the swanky hotel room in Chicago you were roomed in with three other girls from the troupe. Soldier Boy’s Sparkling Sweethearts. People came from miles around to show their patriotism–and get a look-see at the acts. If it weren’t Soldier Boy, it was you and the other Sweethearts. Something for everyone, really. Even in places like–

“Wichita.”

A collective groan filled the space, littered with makeup and dresses that’d inevitably shoved into suitcases in a hurry the moment of checkout. There were more important things to worry about than being organized.

“Better than wherever the hell we were last week. Couldn’t get enough of us on Saturday, and then nearly ran us out with pitchforks after the preacher was through with them Sunday morning.”

“I’m going down to the bar while we’re still in a hotel that has one,” you said. “I’ll be back later.”

“Not if Soldier Boy’s there.” A giggle tore through the room. “Did you see him earlier? He looked like he could eat you alive.”

You weren’t even supposed to have been up there with Soldier Boy during his act, a routine that showed off his powers and preceded his usual rousing speech to get the American public to open their hearts and wallets to the war bonds drive. But Darla had broken her leg while ice skating on a day off in Milwaukee, and Soldier Boy had specifically asked for you to fill her spot.

Your role involved memorizing a few lines from a script and looking pretty while Soldier Boy understandably took the lead, but your “rehearsal” just hours before was little more than going through your lines once before Soldier Boy poured you a shot to “calm your nerves” and spent the following fifteen minutes fucking your mouth before sending you off to get ready for the show. 

Walking up on that stage again after your usual routine with the Sparkling Sweethearts was nerve-wracking. Though you knew what to expect, you still felt like your heart was going to pop out of your chest every time he lifted you above his head or tossed you up in the air and caught you, to the raucous applause and cheers of the Chicagoans and celebrities who’d packed the theater to see him.

“Betty Grable’s in town, so I think she’s the main course,” you said as you left, closing the door behind you and leaving your coworkers to tease you in private.

Among the various hobbies you’d taken up since becoming a Sparkling Sweetheart, people-watching in hotel bars was one of your favorites. He would almost always be there too, an otherworldly presence with an abundance of movers and shakers rotating in his orbit, unable to resist the pull of America’s golden son.

Some of the girls in the troupe didn’t care for him, found him too brash and handsy. You could think of at least one who’d been unceremoniously replaced after loudly complaining one too many times. No one really knew what the extent of his powers were, but after that incident, you suspected enhanced hearing might be among them. Or someone was just a snitch. 

When you stepped into the bar, a quick scan of the room revealed Betty Grable to be nowhere in sight. You didn’t see Soldier Boy either, until a deep voice wrapped around you like velvet.

“There’s my girl.”

“Who, me?” you asked teasingly.

“‘Course you are, honey.”

“Because I heard Betty Grable’s in town—“

He scoffed. “That broad? Who needs her?”

Your chest filled with pride at his statement. She was the pin-up girl of choice for every GI in Europe and the Pacific. Well, almost all of them. His arm settled around your waist as he told the bartender to give you whatever you wanted. The overhead lights in the bar were nice and low, you felt warm beneath Soldier Boy’s gaze. Being the object of his attention always carried weight. He was the world’s first superhero, after all. A living legend. Plenty of other women he could be spending his time with besides you.

Pressing your lips to his cheek, you whispered a ‘thank you’ for the drink, taking in the way he licked his lips, his handsome face so close to yours, still under the slight cover of the shadows. Whoever decided a helmet that covered half of his face would be part of his costume needed serious help. 

“Y’know, if you hadn’t come down here, I might’ve gone up to your room and dragged you out,” he said, lowering his voice so only you could hear. “It’s like you were shakin’ your ass just for me on that stage.”

“It’s called shimmying, and I’m glad you liked it.”

“I was thinking, how about you replace Darla for my act?”

“Permanently?”

“Sure, we’ve got great chemistry,” he said, squeezing your hip, “on and off stage.”

As the night progressed, your conversations with Soldier Boy were interrupted by the slew of people who recognized him, excitedly introducing themselves and asking for a few minutes of his time. He graciously accepted with a ‘You don’t mind, right honey?’ And you shook your head, watching him humor politicians, business moguls, and socialites.

You smiled when the latest one had made their departure, tilting your head the slightest bit. “Do you even remember what my name is?”

“Honey suits you better,” he said, his tongue darting out between his lips. “Bet you taste like it too.”

“You sure?”

“Only one way to find out.”

“I guess so.”

He pressed a kiss to your temple, passing you his room key. “You go make yourself comfortable while I close out my tab.” 

As if he’d even be paying for the drinks himself. It’d probably be billed to the Department of Defense, or that strange company that sponsored the tour. You didn’t pay much attention to who was signing your checks, just that they cashed out when you brought them to the bank.

You balked at his hotel room, far more space than a single man could possibly need. Then again, he rarely spent his nights alone. 

Comfortable. Ridding yourself of your clothes, you climbed into the giant bed, pulling the covers just over your breasts. As you laid back on the plush pillows, you recalled earlier that day when he had swatted your ass as you walked off stage after your act with him was finished, playing it off as a joke to the crowd who cheered and whistled. The simple yet slightly painful gesture had gone straight through you, however, and you worried that there’d be a noticeable wet spot on your satin panties when you and the other Sparkling Sweethearts returned for one last routine to close out the show, your high kicks telling on you.

Biting your lip, you glanced at the door and slipped a hand between your legs. He had only said to make yourself comfortable, nothing specifically about waiting. Gently prodding two fingers against your pussy, you weren’t surprised to find that you were wet already. Your eyes fluttered shut as you pushed your fingers inside, thinking about how his hands felt on you earlier. Strong and steady, big hands that could break you so easily but didn’t.

“Couldn’t wait?” He stood at the end of the bed, fully clothed with his arms folded over his broad chest as he pinned you in place with his disapproving glare.

You gasped, pulling your hand from between your legs. “I was just–”

He clicked his tongue at you, though his eyes betrayed his amusement. “My fault for keeping you waiting too long, doll.”

Soldier Boy joined you on the bed, pulling back the covers you’d pulled over your bare body. He pressed his lips against yours, kissing you with an overwhelming fireceness as he groped your breasts, squeezing down your stomach to your hips and finally your thighs. His lips followed that same path, kissing and biting along your skin that suddenly felt feverish beneath his touch. Still, your pussy ached for him, especially since he had walked in while you were pleasuring yourself, but he wasn’t paying any mind to it.

Until he dipped his head down, licking your wet cunt. In your shock, you pushed your thighs together, as if his intrusion were unwelcome. 

His strong hands held your legs apart, gently squeezing the tender flesh. “I jerked off thinking about this earlier, but nothin' like the real thing, huh?”

You let out a shaky breath, eyes focused on the ornate ceiling. Gold leafing, a Renaissance-esque painting, surely Soldier Boy didn’t care much about that. 

“Eyes on me, honey. You got that?”

Immediately, you looked at him, his blazing green stare burning through you until you nodded. He wasted no time in burying his face between your legs, his tongue flicking against your clit with such force that you realized you had no idea what getting eaten out by a superhero would actually entail. 

He lapped at your pussy with an insatiable fervor that made your legs shake beneath his steady grip. Your moan caught in your throat when he plunged his tongue deeper into you, his nose brushing that sensitive bundle of nerves he’d already teased. 

A whine tore from your throat when he pulled away for a moment, smugly admiring your glistening sex. His lips appeared coated in your juices, and you nearly came at that sight alone.

“Fuck you’re soaked,” he growled appreciatively. “This all for me?”

Who else? As if any other man could make you feel pleasure so intensely, as if that were yet another superpower of his. For a moment you bemoaned a possible future of unsatisfying sex with some regular old Joe–not America’s hero, its fucking sex symbol. But all you could manage was a weak, “Yes.”

Satisfied with your response, he closed his plush lips over your clit, sucking on it like he was pulling from a cigarette, your arousal burning deep in his lungs. You grabbed at the sheets, digging your hands into them as you grind your pussy against his face. Your eyes fluttered shut for a split second, shooting open when he smacked your thigh. Eyes on me.

“Fuck—Soldier Boy,” you moaned. “‘m close.”

He growled against you, the vibrations from his throat edging you closer to orgasm. His inhuman stamina meant he hadn’t given you much of a break since he lowered his face between your thighs. He’d been content to tease you for a while, but he seemed more focused, intentional with the way he ate you out, his attention especially focused on your clit. 

You could feel it, that tightness in your abdomen that was about to snap. Involuntarily, your eyes fluttered shut, and you were on that stage again, in his big arms, bright lights blaring as you stared dreamily at him. Then he threw you in the air, higher and higher until you came back down and–

“Soldier Boy, oh my god–don’t fucking stop,” you pleaded, riding out your orgasm on his face.

His hands held down your bucking hips, your ecstasy overpowered by his determination to bring you over the edge until you were an incoherent mess, muscles aching at the exertion of each orgasm despite him doing all of the work. Light-headed, seeing stars, you reached down, tugging at his hair. That was it. You were tapping out. Mercy.

He granted such, though he pressed sloppy kisses to your inner thighs, nipping at the tender skin. All you could give him was weak moans in return. If you expected to be able to go anywhere else the rest of the night, he’d made damn well sure you couldn’t so much as move from his bed. Maybe that was the idea.  

Your breath caught in your throat when he lifted his head, wiping his glistening lips with the back of his hand, though the evidence of your orgasms was still all over the rest of his face. He kissed you, the foreign taste of yourself filling your mouth, sending a deliciously obscene rush through you. His mouth broke from yours, just for a moment, as he whispered your name against your lips. You realized you didn’t actually know his.

[bratphilia]

note ✧.*‎ hiii so this is completely self indulgent so pls enjoy!! gonna post a couple fics that have been on my mind bc i wanna write when i feel inspired to as much as possible, but reqs will be answered!! anyways no thoughts just mr. afton eating it from the back.

pairing ✧.*‎ steve raglan / william afton x reader

cw ✧.*‎ stuck and fucked trope, oral sex (f receiving), knifeplay, knife fucking (insp by this post!), the usual perverted afton, death threats, dub con, slight daddy kink

taglist ✧.*‎ @dilfity @iikyutee @kissingrhi @jen-parker @kathxstuff @papyrus-the-poet @lowballbread @cecelovesbooks @bluebearieally @cybunii @van-van @iamunabletothinkofablogname @1ncidentdropout @ice-echo26 @officially-a-simp13 @all4kura @el-sol-sale-de-nuevo @littlexstarlightx @samlow23

synopsis ✧.*‎ while trying to escape the damn haunted pizzeria after a murderous rabbit comes after you, you stupidly try to leave through the vent, only to get stuck.

helpless (w. afton x reader)

you're running through the maze of halls as fast as your legs can carry you. what you're running from, exactly? some fuckhead in a rabbit suit with a knife, menacingly advancing towards you, with a cold, evil laughter reminiscent of a typical villain. there's no doubt in your mind he's set on killing you, and you can't help but feel like this position was a setup for that anyways. it would make sense why the average security guard stays no longer than a work-week.

you're headed to your office, the only place with a quick, sure-fire exit that leads directly outside the building: the vents. then you'll make a run for it to your car. it was an ambitious plan, yes, but it had to work. it was the only option you had, after all, given that the rabbit came from the normal exit.

you swing the door to the security office wide open and slam it shut behind you, cringing at the loud clang it makes when it hits the door hinges. the last thing you want is to alert that rabbit of your whereabouts. you instantly crouch down in front of the vent and unscrew it frantically with your fingers. when it breaks loose you crawl inside. the front half of your body works its way inside just fine. the bottom half of you? fuck.

it gets stuck half way around your hips, leaving no room to wriggle in or out. you were stuck. really fucking stuck. this couldn't be happening. panic washes over you in waves and you feel your sweat break out even worse. you slide your hands forward, desperate to move forward, but it doesn't help. tears form in your eyes. i'm going to die, you think, in the most humiliating position possible.

right on cue, there's a banging on the door. there's no doubt in your mind it's that fucking rabbit. in no time, the door busts open, slamming against the nearby desk in a loud bang. "there you are — oh. what's this?"

you let out a whimper in fear as you hear him shuffle towards you and bend down close by your body. you hear a shifting for a long period of time, and then his voice sounds much clearer. you realize that it was just a costume, different from the sentient animatronics you've been desperately trying to keep out of your office the past four nights. "i was planning to gut you... but i have a much better idea."

suddenly, a large hand rests on your ass, groping. you gulp, realizing his the implications of his touch. "what should i do with you, hm?" the man contemplates out loud. he pulls his hand away only to smack your ass, making you cry out and wiggle your hips automatically.

"what a whore. enjoying being at my disposal, knowing i could fucking kill you at any moment now," he spits at you. fuck, the heat at your core is becoming more and more noticeable the more he talks in that gruff voice of his threateningly. you scared, really fucking scared, and that somehow made this situation hotter.

his hand leaves your ass, then there's the sound of something metallic being picked up off the floor. "i wouldn't move if i were you," the man muses, "'less you want your sweet little body sliced open." before you can process what he said, he brings something to the seam of your pants and it slices through. your eyes widen and you shriek when you realize it's a blade.

you flatten your hands against the cool metal of the vent, already warming up with your sweat and prolonged stay there. it's even harder not to move when you're scared as fuck and can't grip onto anything. he stops once he's satisfied with the way he cut through your pants, and fuck, how will you get out of here with split pants? if you even make it out of here.

with unbelievable strength, he sticks both his hands inside the slit he made, runs the tips of his fingers teasingly along the center of your panties, before ripping the fabric of your pants even wider. when the sound of the fabric coming apart hits your ears, tears burn at your eyes from the shame of thinking about leaving like this. "beautiful," he comments, "what a fucking sight you make."

you blush at his words. he reaches forward to thumb at you through your panties. he prods his thumb at your hole, dipping in the fabric of your panties inside. you can't help but moan quietly. much to your dismay, he notices with a low chuckle. "like i said, absolute whore." you whimper at that. absolute whore. a tear slips down your face.

you forget all about that when he leans forward and presses a kiss to your panties. he lewdly inhales your scent, rubbing his nose against your panties before pressing another kiss there. fuck. you're whimpering uncontrollably. he's such a pervert; you should be embarrassed, but in your undeniable sex-craving haze, all you want him to do is pull your panties to the side and ravage you.

like you manifested it or something, he does just that. except he stretches your panties and the blade returns, slicing through the useless fabric. he lets out a low whistle at your supposedly shiny slick. "just as i thought. needy little slut, so desperate for daddy's touch."

"mhm," you murmur, resting your head down on your hands. you're so fucking horny at this point, that you want to be at the mercy of your captor.

"mhm," he parrots back to you. his face moves forward to slowly lick a stripe up your cunt.

"oh fuck," you mumble, shaking. he repeats the action, laughing slightly at your reaction while doing so. his hands come forward to part your lips, diving in fully. he shakes his face against your cunt and you feel the tickling sensation of a beard there, making you jolt.

the obscene noises he makes add to your wetness. he slurps around, suctioning his lips all over. he leaves no place untouched. he quickly smacks kisses against your clit before tongue-fucking your sobbing hole. he flicks his insanely long and tongue inside of you. you're crying and babbling incoherent words as he tortures you.

you're so close already. the way he alternates between sucking your bud into his mothing and then fucking into your hole is too much. thinking about the fact that you're completely at his mercy, nothing to grip on to, clawing desperately at the metal of the vent, practically tips you over the edge alone. just as you feel the pulse of your cunt quicken—

it's all over too soon. he removes his tongue and you cry out into the vent frustratingly, ignoring the way your voice bounces off the walls. he rests his head against your ass and listens to you sob and then coos, "aww, poor baby. i almost feel bad."

"please," you cry softly, tears running down your face.

"gonna have to be more specific, sweet thing, 'm not a mind reader, y'know." but you can't. you can't bring yourself to say you want him to fucking smother his face in your cunt. it's too embarrassing to utter, even after you shamelessly backed into his face.

he clicks his tongue. "no? well, that's a shame. if you can't say it, guess i'll just do whatever i want with you."

before you can question what the hell that means, something is shoved inside of you. not his cock, much to your dismay, but something blunt, something that stretches you out. you realize, the only thing it could possibly be, that fucking knife.

he slides it in and out, laughing at your reactions. fuck, he's so fucking cruel. your fear only adds to your arousal, and you're soaking the stick of his knife. you hate to admit it, but this probably the second best thing to his cock.

before you know it, you're drenching his knife with your orgasm. you cry out desperately into the vent. the way it echoes into the cavern is music to his ears. you slam your hands against the vent and shake uncontrollably. he slowly pulls the knife away, intentionally torturing you as you hiccup in sobs. you're fucked out already, in a state of absolute post-sex haze.

he presses a surprisingly soft kiss against one globe of your ass and rubs on it. as you calm down, he's cooing at you again, whispering about how you're such a good girl for him, did so well.

[amphitriteswife]

📝✂️Ror/ Snv characters as Students📝✂️

Qin shin huang:

🪭 never listens to the teacher. Like ever. He just does a lot of shit and the teacher is fed up with him so they let it slide

🪭 He’s the type of student to never study or show up and still pass with ease. No one knows how, not even the teachers.

🪭’ Qin you have had like 43 periods of missed lesson and it’s not even the second semester. How the hell did u even pass my test’ ‘Sir, i am literally God’s chosen emperor’

🪭 If you’re partnered up with him, prepare to take the lead cause bro either doesn’t know shit or he aint even present to begin with

🪭Even though he doesn’t do much for projects, he still buts whatever you need for it as a way to repay you. Including if he gets food or drinks, he’s paying for them too.

🪭Has very random subjects. Mainly cause they have China in them, including Chinese.

🪭 ‘Alright, what subjects do you wish to choose to take exams from?’ ‘China’

🪭 Violates dress codes. You need to dress in uniform? He’ll wear the most lavish suit you have ever laid your eyes upon. The school has a gala and you need to dress fancy? He’ll pull up w the most casual and basic outfit ever.

🪭 If he’s actually present, which is a rare sight, he’s usually loud. Mainly cause he has lots of friends and basically knows everyone since you can get along with him greatly.

🪭 complains about a lot of subjects. Math? He hates it. Biology? It gives him big brain moment and he doesn’t get it. Literature? Not Chinese? He don’t want anything to do with it.

🪭 ‘Ma’am i’m innocent, why does thou must bestows such suffering upon me?’ ‘Qin i just asked you if you could read page 34 out loud’

🪭 popular with girls. U know how bro rizzed up Alvitr? Yeah he does that with other girls too. He’s one of the popular dudes so it’s not like it’s hard either💀

🪭He’s a kpop stan. You can’t prove me otherwise. He listens to BTS, Straykidz, Ateez, KAI, EXO, Tri.be, Itzy and a lot more.

🪭 has lots of friends to the point he almost knows the whole school. Even the new comers.

🪭He a player actually. You know how bro had like idk 39291819101 concubines? Yeah that doesn’t change here either. ‘Hannah? She was In February. Mao mao? She’s so last week’

🪭Throws house parties. The extravagant ones too. Big house, a pool, big garden, many floors. You name it. Funny thing is: it aint even the main house.

🪭won the vote for: ‘Who will most likely become a stripper at the end of the school year?’ In the year books. Most think it’s not even cause he needs money but because he’ll do it for fun

🪭 passed out during the School Gala cause he heard someone say that Sushi is Japanese.

🪭doesn’t eat cafeterias food. ‘I, Qin Shi Huang, refuse to eat this….stuff…I have my own glorious food. You’ll never catch him eat anything that isn’t Asian food.

🪭Bothers ppl during lectures. As in he turns and just stares. He’ll either smile or just keep staring to annoy you.

🪭 always goes to school functions, yet ends up being the one yall wait for to go back. He just disappears when yall arrive and spawns back 34 min late.

🪭Has started a campaign for trips to China

🪭 Had a lot of baby momma’s. He a cool dad and rich enough for it. Lowkey knows how to be a dad too

Poseidon:

🔱 he’s in the school’s swimming team and even won awards for it.

🔱 straight A+ student. He a boring one okay. He dont party, doesn’t even hang out after school. Straight home and learning.

🔱 You’ll only catch him drinking water during breaks and eating nutritious. He actually enjoys salad’s. Especially when it’s middle eastern ones. Does he know what’s in it? He thinks. But he dont care. If it healthy and it bussing it works for him.

🔱 ‘My body is a temple’ ahh student. It wouldn’t be surprising if his ass did Yoga or some meditation.

🔱 only goes to school trips if it’s on the beach or it’s for a grade. He the type of person that actually does the assignment instead of having fun.

🔱 he doesn’t have many friends and usually sticks to his brothers or has his earphones in. He’s the one that’s usually silent during that time too

🔱 He’s the honor graduate. Didn’t give a speech tho. He just grabbed the diploma and dipped. He did grab some food that was prepared

🔱 actually has a gf??🤨 like legit, and she’s the captain of the swimming team. He lowkey simps but he’s Poseidon so you probably will never notice.

🔱 was at a house party once. ONCE. Bro got wasted. He didn’t know punch contained alcohol, bro thought it was lemonade. Ate too much with alcohol in his system. I think yall can guess that it didn’t end well for em😭

🔱 He wears casual clothes, sometimes blazers. He doesn’t like yoga pants cause they look ‘lanky’ not even during Yoga

🔱 He takes notes during classes. Like every class. Every moment. He either writes them or types it on his laptop. Only shared with ppl likes. It’s always organized too.

🔱 if you’re partnered up with him, it can go two ways. He’s either doing only his part and leaves you to fend for yourself. Or he helps (rare sight) with the difficult parts.

🔱 he prefers communicating in the chat document. That way he can be home and still communicate if he needs to, he doesn’t like calling cause his brothers are loud asf, and he wouldn’t talk until necessary.

🔱 supports the school library. Mostly because it’s quiet and he likes quiet, but also because he wants to read a lot and it’s an excuse to not go home. He usually studies there too.

🔱 goes to waterparks during school breaks and posts pics on insta. Insta only too. No snap, no facebook, no bereal, no nothing. Even if he does have it, he doesn’t want others to know.

🔱 surprisingly has discord. But it’s only to play games. He curses ppl out in voice chat.

🔱 would either never have kids or ends up being a teenage dad. Dw tho, his gf can support him if he ends up being a stay at home husband.

🔱 models for extra money. Mostly tight clothes cause they gotta use that body for good advertisement.

🔱 he also hits the gym regularly, so he posts pics about him at the gym too.

🔱 has an onlyfans?????

Loki:

🎭 probably sees the school therapist. Every month too. They give him candy.

🎭 Actually likes literature, art, music and surprisingly p.e🤨 he likes p.e cause he can get his mind off things and look good

🎭 probably has or is in an emo phase. He has his ear pierced and wears black cargo pants. Might even have some tattoo’s.

🎭 He either annoys ppl or is very quiet. Although ppl are mostly scared when he’s quiet cause he unpredictable.

🎭 He probably goes out for walks with his earphones in after school. Like y’know when it’s raining a lil and you can smell the grass n all while you listen to music? Yeah that’s his nostalgic experience.

🎭 He writes poems in his free times or spents a lot of time in the atelier.

🎭 Had a very messy break up with sigyn and it was the hot topic in the school. It was in the school’s newspaper and everything. Even the teachers knew

🎭 he listens to a lot of music. Mostly during making art or writing. He mostly listens to: Mitsuki, Chase Atlantic, Beach Weather, The Weekend, Tylor the Creator and The Neighborhood.

🎭He either hates or loves school trips. Even if he hates the school trip he still goes, mainly because Sigyn goes. But he won’t talk to her though. Cause he too scared.

🎭 He takes aesthetically pleasing pictures of different things. He has a nature page, a dark royal one and a school one. All of em are on insta though.

🎭 he does sometimes go to parties, but he either spends a lot of time with his friends and gets wasted or goes home early.

🎭He’s friends with Hercules and Ares. Who are mostly concerned for his well being.

🎭 he also might have gotten into heavy metal and vkei. His ass might may have since it cause Sigyn likes it.

🎭 if you pared with him you, he either does stuff ir leaves it and does it on the last moment before tge deadline. His ass likes working alone. Secretly prays to be put w Sigyn

🎭 Legit had a mental breakdown in class once. I think bro is used to having em.

🎭 Got voted to be one of those pissy teachers later on in life in the year book.

That’s all for now💀 might make a part two w more characters.

⭐️tag list⭐️ @miss-seanymph-pani @tinyy-tea-cup @heldril @nicasdreamer @monstertreden @riseofamoonycake @imperfectbloodmoon @salmonpoki @snowmantita @rukia-writes @swallowtail-lotus @brokensenseofhumor @bromeliae

[roxygen22]

Little Sister

"My Little Cocoa Bean" Series

Summary: The Wonka family gets a little bigger. This time, Ben/Bean picks the new baby's nickname.

C/W: Late period, morning sickness, pregnancy, labor (nothing graphic)

☆☆☆☆☆

You knew it was going to be a long day when you woke up exhausted. You were usually up and out of bed before Willy and Ben on the weekends in order to savor a few moments of alone time. Today, though, you kept dozing back off even after you felt Willy stir and get up.

Since you were typically the first to wake, Willy decided to take the opportunity to surprise you with breakfast. The clanging of plates and pans eventually brought you to the kitchen, though one whiff of scrambled eggs sent you running for the washroom. It hadn't even registered with Willy that you were even in the kitchen until he caught sight of the flurry of your robe out of the corner of his eye.

Willy winced as he heard you wretching. He made up a plate for Ben and set him down at the table to eat. "Stay here and eat your breakfast, Bean, while I go check on Mamma." He fetched a glass of water and ruffled the boy's hair as he walked past.

You were slumped in front of the toilet, whimpering with every dry heave of your empty stomach. Willy knelt down and handed you the glass of water, which you accepted gratefully with shaky hands.

"Are you alright?"

"I'll be okay," you croaked and hiccupped, leaning over the toilet as you felt more saliva pool in your mouth. Willy pulled stray hairs back from your face and drew soothing circles up and down your back.

He was silent for a few more moments before asking, "Do you think you could be pregnant? We haven't exactly been careful since our chat on the beach," he smirked with a playful gleam in his eye. "You couldn't stand the smell of eggs when you were pregnant with Bean, either."

Leaning back and wiping your mouth with a towel, you paused as you made eye contact with him. It certainly wasn't outside the realm of possibility. "I'll see if the midwife can check me over tomorrow."

☆☆☆☆☆

Sure enough, you were carrying Baby Wonka #2. He or she would make their debut in about 6-7 months. You had been so busy with Ben and going back to work part time that you hadn't even noticed your period was late by a number of weeks.

Willy, of course, was over the moon. Ben didn't quite understand but picked up on his parents' excitement. Noodle brought over some books for you to read to him about becoming a big brother, and you bought him a baby doll to practice gentle holding.

Months went by and your belly grew. Ben loved to "hug" the baby and feel them kick and move around. It was quite common for both your boys to spend the evening flanking you on the sofa with their hands on your belly as you read to them.

In the days leading up to the little one's arrival, you were overcome with the urge to clean and organize. Recognizing the same behavior that led up to Ben's arrival, Willy made arrangements to stay home from the shop and factory. You were grateful because while you wanted to make the most of these last moments with Ben as your only baby, it was becoming increasingly difficult for you to get into the floor with him to play.

However, when the big day finally arrived, it was annoying to have Willy around for early labor. At the slightest sign of discomfort, he would drop everything to hover and ask what you need. You appreciated the sentiment and knew it came from a place of love and adoration, but after two hours...

"Willy, I'm fine!" you snapped and shocked yourself with your own response. He froze and looked at you with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry, I...I just want to help. I'm just not sure how at the moment," he replied softly.

"I know. I'm sorry, my love. I didn't mean to be short with you. It's just...these pains are not regular yet, so we are in for hours more of this. Why don't you take Ben to the park for a little bit so you can both burn off some energy and I can rest."

You could tell that Willy was conflicted, but he relented and got Ben ready for the outing. You kissed them both on their way out the door and then awkwardly lowered yourself to the sofa for a nap. Their failed attempts at being quiet alerted you to their return.

"Alright, Bean, we need to stay quiet because Mamma is still asleep," you heard Willy whisper.

"Bedtime? I don't wanna go to bed," the boy whined.

"No, no, it's not bedtime. She is just tired and needed a nap."

"It takes a lot of energy to grow a baby," whispered a third voice that you recognized as Noodle's. They must have swung by the library on their outing.

"Is baby here yet?"

"No, not yet. But soon, very soon." You could hear the smile in Willy's voice.

"Not soon enough," you said as three sets of eyes turned to look at you standing in the doorway.

After you greeted Noodle and Ben with hugs, Willy came up to you and cradled your cheek with one hand and your belly with the other. "Has it been long enough now to ask how you are feeling?" he asked playfully.

You leaned into his touch. "The nap did me some good. I am feeling less grouchy if that is what you are asking," you teased.

Willy scoffed sarcastically. "Darling, I would never in my wildest dreams call you grouchy." He booped the tip of your nose then whirled around to head to the kitchen, plucking Ben up from the floor along the way. "Come on Bean, let's get lunch started."

You and Noodle remained in the study and settled on the sofa. She eyed you for a moment as you winced and repositioned yourself before saying, "I'm feeling some deja vu. Seems like just yesterday that we were in this same room playing cards and waiting for Benny's debut. Willy asked if I could come keep him preoccupied while...well, you know."

"Thank you, Noodle. I really appreciate it. It'll make things easier knowing he's in good hands. Ben loves his time with you."

"I'm glad to be of some help. And to be among the first to meet my new niece or nephew," she grinned as she laid a hand on your belly. Her smile fell when she felt your abdomen become rigid under her palm. "Does it hurt?"

"They are starting to pack more of a punch," you admitted. "But we still probably have a while to go." The two of you chatted a while longer between your contractions before Willy walked in, wiping his hands on a dish towel.

"Hope you're hungry! Food is ready." Noodle stood and both of them helped you off the sofa. You took a couple of steps and stopped suddenly, gripping Willy's arm tightly as a more intense contraction in your lower back took you by surprise.

"Nnnngh," you groaned through gnashed teeth. Willy took your other arm in his to support more of your weight. You leaned your forehead against his chest as you breathed through the pain.

Noodle looked at Willy knowingly. "About 5 minutes since the last one, but it was nowhere near that intense."

"I'm going to call the midwife," he stated. You nodded against his chest. He transferred your hands one by one to the back of the sofa for support so he could go make the call.

Noodle rubbed a hand up and down your back. "I'll go make a plate for Benny." All you could do is nod and shoot her a grateful glance before another wave of pain washed over your body.

Well, this is progressing much faster than last time, you thought.

You felt a large set of hands press into your lower back in just the right spot to ease some of the pain. "She'll be on her way shortly," Willy supplied.

"You should go eat, too, while you have a chance."

"I'm fine. I'm not hungry right now anyway."

"Anxious?" you asked.

"A bit. As much as I love our babies, I don't enjoy seeing the pain you have to endure to bring them earthside."

"I'm beginning to question why I agreed to do this again," you laughed. "But it's worth it."

He helped you to the bedroom, though you had no desire to lay down even after the midwife arrived. You were restless and paced the room, only stopping to lean against the bed or Willy during contractions. After an hour or so, he was supporting your weight in a hug-like stance, your arms around his neck, and head on his chest when you were overcome by the urge to push. Willy looked over at the midwife for reassurance. This labor was different from Ben's in almost every way.

As if reading his thoughts, she said, "It's alright. She can stay standing if she's more comfortable as long as you have a good hold of her."

Willy adjusted his grip under your arms, kissed your hair, and whispered, "I've got you, [y/n]. I've got you. Lean on me as much as you need. You're doing so well. Not long now. You can do this." Reinvigorated by his words, you delivered a squalling newborn less than 10 minutes later.

"It's a girl!" declared the midwife.

You looked up at Willy to see him crying and smiling. "A girl, [y/n]. Just like you hoped for."

With the last of your strength and Willy's support, you made your way over to the bed to rest. The midwife cleaned the little one up and brought her to you. Willy sat on the edge of the bed next to you to look over your shoulder at your tiny daughter and press kisses to your head.

"She looks like you," he said in awe. "Absolutely beautiful. What should we name her?"

"I was thinking Charlotte."

"I love it. A beautiful name for a beautiful girl."

"Can you take her to meet Ben while we finish up here? I'm sure he heard the commotion and is eager for an update," you said as you gently transferred the baby into Willy's arms. He took a moment to simply hold and stare at his baby girl before exiting.

"She already has him wrapped around her little finger," the midwife noted cheerfully.

"Indeed," you replied with a smile before laying back against the pillow and closing your eyes.

☆☆☆☆☆

Willy walked into the study with a blanketed bundle in his arms. Ben approached him excitedly with Noodle not far behind. Willy knelt down so the boy could see.

"Bean, meet your baby sister, Charlotte."

Ben peered over Willy's arms at the squirming, pink girl. "Char...Charlie?" He twisted his mouth and furrowed his brow, trying to say it.

Willy chuckled. "Well, I suppose we could call her Charlie for short."

Ben nodded eagerly. "Hi, Charlie. I'm your big brudder. I waited a looooong time to meet you. Mamma said you can't play like I play for a while, but I wait longer."

Willy looked up at Noodle with watery eyes. Her hand was in front of her mouth to stop herself from cooing at the sweet scene. She knelt down beside Ben to give him a hug and get a closer look at her new niece. "You are going to be a great big brother, Benny."

☆☆☆☆☆

More "My Little Cocoa Bean" series shorts are available on my masterlist.

[sandyca5tle]

Slime HRT - 24 Months

Well, these past couple months have been hell, with a light at the end of the tunnel that I’ve now reached, but still. Anyway, on with the show…

So, before I get into the really gritty stuff, my jaw and teeth were converted pretty early on, as well as my ear bones. The former were a little funky, but honestly nothing really changed there, since I already don’t need to chew things, losing my teeth was no big deal, and for the latter, there was a small blip in my hearing - for a few minutes - but then it came back, honestly better than before. I wasn’t super worried about the hearing loss, particularly after eyes taste and smell, only how long I'd be deaf for, but fortunately, as I said, it really wasn't a problem. I’m pretty sure that my slime has just replaced my inner ear’s function innately, and since hearing is just interpreted vibrations, and slime is pretty good at vibrating. What was and has been nice is the cat ears I made a few months back can now actually function, which took a little getting used to, but my hearing is super good now, if a little overwhelming at times.

Right, on to the less pleasant parts: Remember how in the last update I said that apparently you know when your brain goes, yeah, that’s true, and it’s ‘cause it’s genuinely the most painful, disorienting, and scary thing I have ever experienced. First of all, unlike a lot of other changes, it kinda just goes all at once - I think it’s a survival thing, the brain/core wouldn’t function while being half transformed, and it’d probably kill you if they tried to. Only issue is that this means that your brain basically dissolves over the course of a few hours, which is excruciating, and the weeks leading up to that absolutely suck as well.

The first thing I noticed was the pain - headaches, some of the worst I’ve ever had (which I know I’ve said a lot over the course of this, but I was fortunate before to have very little issues, and turns out transforming your whole body hurts). I tried to take some painkillers to help, but they don’t seem to work any more - not sure if it’s ‘cause my biology is so different now, or ‘cause my body breaks them down too well, but either way they don’t work, so I had to suffer through the pain.

Either on top of or because of the pain, I've had a general sense of disorientation. It started off as just sometimes getting a little turned around in games and the like, but it progressed to getting lost if I tried to go anywhere (which was compounded by some other stuff too). Frankly it's a good thing in the final days before my brain changed that I hurt too much to go anywhere, else I probably would have ended up somewhere entirely unknown at a really vulnerable stage in my transformation.

I also have had some memory issues while things have worked things out. My memory has never been amazing in the first place, but I started to get very forgetful, forgetting appointments, plans, even eating (I'd usually ‘remember’ when I started idly eating random things I had around, which has meant I've lost a few things, but I don't remember what so I'm keep finding things I need to replace). I’m also pretty sure I lost some older memories too, but it’s really hard to tell if that’s from normal forgetting or forgetting ‘cause my brain was becoming mush, it’s kinda scary not knowing. This is also part of what compounded my disorientation - when telling left from right is getting hard, forgetting where you're even meant to go or have come from only makes things worse. Also, try reforming yourself from a puddle when you barely remember what you were before… definitely had some interesting shapes recently. Honestly, it was terrifying, I actually didn't know if I'd ever be able to remember things again (obviously I can, but I didn't know that at the time, and my memory of that period are sketchy at best)

Of course, the pain I mentioned earlier made it hard to focus on things, but even beyond that my ability to focus seemed to vanish. I have been so easily distracted over the past couple of months. Genuinely a glint of light or something could completely draw my attention from whatever I was doing, and then I'd usually completely forget what I was doing, get distracted by something else and wonder off. I apparently walked off in the middle of so many games and videos and just any activity I was doing. Frankly it's a miracle that I have any notes, or remember enough to actually write this entry, I kinda spent most of this last month piecing together what I do remember and have notes of (the notes are not the most legible, worse than my normal handwriting which is awful anyways (there's a reason I type these updates)). 

On top of all this, I also had nightmares and hallucinations. The former sucked, but honestly asides from waking up in some weird shapes in attempts to either fight or defend myself from whatever was jumping me in the nightmare (assuming it was a monster one) they were over once I woke up. The hallucinations were worse, since they could appear at any time, and oh boy do they seem real. Sometimes they were small things, noises, or a shape in my periphery. Other times they were blurry, intimidating figures in the distance. And of course with my inability to focus on things, these hallucinations would only be another thing to distract my addled brain. The worst though, was waking up from a nightmare, a puddle unable to reform, and the nightmare continuing as a hallucination in the real world. That'd usually shake me up for a day - and annoyingly my memory issues didn't really seem to extend to them. I'm still working out what was real and fake from that time, and it has not been easy, or fun. My ‘brain’ feels like goddamn soup whenever I think about that time. 

On top of everything else, sometimes I'd faint. Sometimes due to pain, other times (particularly towards the end of the transformation) I'd just keel over, only to wake up in a puddle of myself. It was really disconcerting and scary… kinda felt like my brain was just cutting out, and I was a little scared it might not cut back in at some point… and of course that’s one of the things I remember clearly, the fear and worry of that - very clear that the ‘remember bad shit’ survival instinct was and still is functioning, as annoying as that is.

Since I don't particularly want to linger on those thoughts more than I already have, an interesting thing to note is that even through all of this, my actual mental faculties didn't diminish - while I was forgetful and distracted, if I managed to make myself, I found myself just as capable as before. I partially did this to help assure myself I wasn't losing myself, but also because, let's be honest, slimes aren't known for being the brightest bunch, and I've been a little worried this whole time that I'd get dumber or something. The pamphlet I was given didn't really say anything about this happening, but I know from trans hrt that the information your given doesn't always include every possible effect (I know it certainly failed to mention the attention issues during the most recent stage, and the blindness from before) 

But, despite last month being basically the worst month of my life, I have survived, albeit a little scrambled, and I'm slowly putting everything back together. And of course, now, there's nothing human left in me! I'm all slime!!! (It makes me so unbelievably happy to be able to say that now).

Interestingly, unlike everything else, my brain hasn't fully gone, instead I ended up with what I quickly realised is a slime core! For those unfamiliar, slimes can have a core, which is essentially like their brain/major organ inside them, usually looking like a small coloured sphere. While slimes are usually pretty hard to damage permanently, damage done to a slimes core can be very debilitating, like heart, brain, or lung damage for humans and stuff. 

I actually think I had a kind of proto-core before hand, but didn't notice it, and I think it came around about when my digestive system was changed, since I think my core manages matter-to-slime conversion (I'm guessing this ‘cause that's improved since my core has now fully formed). I guess I didn’t spy it before ‘cause it was too small or something?

On that note, my core is/looks like, interestingly, a kind of verdant green gem. It mostly just seems to float inside of my goo, although I can move it around my body wherever I like, but I tend to keep it either right in the middle of my torso, or in the middle of my chest (at least in human form). Both areas have a decent amount of goo protecting my core, and it looks neat to have it there. 

It does actually look really pretty, especially when taken outside of my body (don't worry, it can be taken out of my body, so long as it remains in contact with my goo I'm completely fine), and yeah, just kinda looks like a funky green stone/gem. I am curious as to why it's green, and I'm kinda hoping it's gonna boost the efficiency of my photosynthesis, and that it's green ‘cause of chlorophyll, but I don't honestly know yet, need some nice sunny days to properly test it out. 

I did find out that if my core does become separated from my goo, I can just reform another body from stored goo around the core, leaving the old body to fall (but I can just reabsorb it afterwards to maintain mass). Oh, and before anyone worries that I was being reckless, I made sure to check that I wouldn't die before I tested anything.

On the note of stored goo, it seems like excess goo/matter is stored in the core, like fat in humans. I'm not sure what or if there's a limit or what happens if I try to eat too much, but as far as I've gotten for now, it seems to be fine. I have noticed that I actually seem lighter now, I still seem to weigh about as much as I look like I should (maybe slightly over) and as such it changes if I make myself grow bigger, but not really if I eat things. I'm not entirely sure quite what's going on there, as that seems like some physics defying shit, but it's actually super useful, means I can store as much mass as I'd like and not break the sofa when I sit down. 

So asides from all of those experiences and changes, I've found a couple other things that have sprung up from these changes. Firstly, I've found that my body feels much more coherent, I'm very much now one gelatinous entity, rather than bits of one and bits of another. Movement feels much more fluid now, especially outside of a humanoid form (not that I've gotten worse at being humanoid, just better at everything else) and I honestly find myself kind of hot swapping between slime ball and slime girl as I need/feel like it. Also navigating crowds is super easy now, just kinda slipping and moving between any gaps (I could kinda do this before, but again, now it feels so second nature). On top of this, my multitasking seems to have improved. I still can’t say one thing while writing another, but I've gotten better at physical multitasking; I struggle less coordinating my ‘hands’ when I try playing the piano for example (I still can't play it, but I've got more of the coordination for it). Add in that I can very easily have several limbs/pseudopods/whatever you want to call them at once (which is honestly why I think my multitasking has improved, it's to facilitate control of the numerous structures I can now produce) and it’s become very easy to manage multiple, physical, tasks at once. 

One thing I have noticed myself doing, almost subconsciously (and honestly, this might've started a little before now, but I'll talk about it here, since I've really noticed it now), I'll just adjust my body however I need in the moment. Now, this may sound kind of obvious, but it's a little funky (but mostly neat) to just suddenly grow an extra limb, or pseudopod to hold or grab something quickly, or to just adjust my mass to better balance or manage something. Again, very neat, but a little funky to realise when I didn't consciously think about it. 

Relatedly, shaping has become easier, not sure if that's due to practise, or having a more compatible neurological centre, but I seem to be able to shape myself quicker, and I seem to have gained a better memory for shape too, the latter is definitely due to recent changes, or at least, definitely due to the treatment.

I've  also still been working on my acid control, which feels like it's gotten easier, but again I can't say whether that's from practice or the recent changes, but I can at least somewhat reliably keep an area of my body acid free now for a bit.

Unrelated to the treatment, but I'm actually much shorter now, at least in my humanoid form, clocking in at around 4’4”(slime ball form has remained the same size, at around 30cm tall). I always liked the idea of being really small, and I can now, and it's not like it really offers any disadvantages, since I can just reach tendrils up to grab things from high up (with eyes/vision so I can see what I'm doing), plus it means I have more spare slime to spend on other, more fun things than just being tall. This all being said, the idea of using all my slime to become really big also has its appeals, but it's less practical for day to day life. 

To touch on one final thing, I definitely don't feel human anymore. I'm a slime, through and through, humanity is just a memory. I've mentioned before feeling more and more detached from humanity (if I ever felt truly attached) as this process has gone on, but now that I'm seemingly done, I don't feel human at all. Interestingly, I find this aspect has been remarkably similar to gender transition, with the feeling of being a guy slowly fading away until it seemed alien to think of myself as one, which kinda feels like where I'm at at the moment. I'll likely catch myself still including myself in humanity from time to time for a while, but I can safely say I'm a slime, and I am so happy I can now. So that’s what my life has been for the last couple of months, and while parts sucked - like, really sucked - the end result is so unbelievably worth it. While this feels like the end of slime hrt, I do have an appointment planned with the doc to talk about my next step and hopefully get myself onto shapeshifter hrt, so my next update will probably be about that. See y’all then!

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@calliecwrites, @friedsputnik, @now-entering-the-goop-zone, @scrubbinn, @lilacinthefog

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[fuzzyclink]

Wrote a Cirrus x Vesper fic! I originally posted this on my touchstarved blog here but I've been finding that my posts from there don't show up in any tags currently, so reposting here.

Warnings: 18+ mdni, priest kink, eating, food, humiliation, violence, spitting, bad BDSM ettiquette, sadism, kicking, blood/pain. Reader gender not described(pronouns/body).

Cloying

As the last full moon of the year draws closer, the paths of the city buzz with excitement. Though not everyone under the mountain prays to the Lunar God, plenty are happy to join in the merriment or make a profit off of people who are celebrating the festival. This time of year people cluster around the usually isolated church - vendors crowding around the base of the building with their wares. You've decided to join in the celebrations yourself, donning a black seasonal mask that covers your nose to forehead, with a small, delicate depiction of the moon going through various phases positioned right above your eyebrows.

Tonight is the official start of the festival, though anticipation has been brewing for the last week. As it's your first year here, you haven't been able to attend a Lunar Cleanse service, only hearing about it in bits and pieces from people at The Leaping Bear. Privately, you're a bit excited to experience something new. You've been so caught up in your search for a cure that you think some merriment for once would do you good. And, you're curious to see Cirrus lead the congregation through the ceremony. You've never seen him in front of a large group like that before.

The ceremony is starting shortly, so you make your way to the church. The streets are alive with festival-goers milling around. The air, usually damp and still, is filled with sweet scents. It's more humid than ever, hazy air rising from delicious round buns, steamed and stuffed with savory meats and vegetables. You see a nearby vendor lay out pale sesame rice balls on small plates, sticking to the fingers of people who tear into them hungrily. Another vendor is selling marshmallow filled cookies, covered in a thin layer of white frosting. On your way to the church, a stall selling candy catches your eye. You purchase some quickly, grabbing a bag of tiny, glittering silver candies. You pull open the narrow bag as you walk, placing a candy in your mouth. As you roll the sphere around on your tongue, a delicate flavor of jasmine fills your mouth, and you crunch the rest of it between your teeth happily. It's a delight to see the backbreaking worries of the city fall away, even if it's only for a short period of time.

The sounds and scents of the busy street fade away as you enter the church. The church is busier than you've ever seen it before, the building crowded with devotees sitting shoulder to shoulder in the pews. Even though it's crowded, everyone speaks in hushed voices. The building has been decorated with gleaming ribbons, strung along the tops of the walls. The placement of the ribbon leads you to think that few other than Cirrus would be able to place the decorations. You snicker to yourself quietly, imagining him wobbling on the tips of his toes to secure ribbons around the building. Or maybe, you think as your smile widens, he stood on a small stepstool? Your exploratory gaze falls upon Cirrus himself, standing at the front of the room. You immediately avert your gaze, feeling as if he would be able to sense your daydreaming just from your facial expression. He has a way of drawing guilt to the surface of your thoughts, bobbing to the top unavoidably like a cork in water.

You find a seat at the back of the room and slide into the end of a pew, crowded rows of benches lining the chapel in front of you. Your neighbor gives you a quick nod, their silvery silk mask glinting under the light of the candles before turning back to the front of the room. You clutch your candy in your hands, placing the bag on your lap. The room quiets as Cirrus takes his place at a podium. He wears the robes you've always seen him in, but in this moment they seem almost ethereal, glowing and shimmering in front of the candles. Silver hair cascades down his back as he stands resolutely before the crowd. His shoulders stand strong and the power he emits reaches you all the way in the back of the room. The crowd leans forward in anticipation.

"At this time of year we are able to begin anew," he intones, sweeping his hands out to the audience.

"The moon is pale and shining- a reminder of the ending of one year, and beginning of another. All of us gather to praise it’s light.

"All gather to praise", the congregation murmers in response. You hastily mumble some words, wishing that the service came with a tutorial. You hadn't realized there would be a call and response.

Cirrus continues. "The Night Air pierced by Silver Light presses down upon us. The Moon shines through us. We ask for it to illuminate our darkest faults, to wash them clean. Each of you have made grave errors this year," he sternly states, gazing out into the room. "Each of you have mistakes that you wish to release." You swear you can feel his eyes upon you, and wonder nervously about any possible mistakes you have made recently. Does it count that you hadn't brought your dishes to the counter at The Leaping Bear? Or maybe you’ve been too rude to the vendors when, time and time again, they have no news for your cure?

Cirrus's voice cuts through your thoughts.

"Let the strike of bells pull your guilt from you and release it. Let each toll into your heart and feel it dredge up the turmoil within. Bring your darkness out and let it whither in the light".

He stands commandingly at the front of the room, a bell the size of his fist resting in his gloved hands. He carefully swings his arm, the sound of the bell crisply ringing through the room. It's medium pitched and sharp, startling you in the quiet. You jolt a little, shifting in your seat. As it echos through the room, he paces softly across the front of the church. Another toll spreads through the space as he reaches the left side.

"Bring your sorrows up through your chest and release them with your breath," he instructs, a lecturer to an obedient audience. You try to obey, but your breath catches in your throat at the next ring - the sound so sharp and striking that it tears your attention away and sends a shock through your body. He continues to stride slowly at the front of the room, each subsequent ring of the bell growing softer and softer until you can barely tell whether he's rung it again or if the sound still lingers faintly in the air from the previous strike.

"Let your breath serve as a reminder to you of the life given to you, and of the light that will always return to you, even when the darkness feels crushing and all-encompassing. Just as you inhale and exhale, the moon changes and is lighted anew." He pauses for a moment, solemnly surveying the audience. You feel light and unburdened, more at peace than you have felt in weeks.

"With renewed spirits and lightened hearts, let us learn from those who have walked before us. In the first book of the Lunar Scripts..." Cirrus continues onwards, describing to the congregation a particularly (in your mind), dry and archaic passage from historical literature written long ago. Your eyes begin to close as his voice continues slowly on, the soft light of the chapel blurring in front of your half-lidded gaze. Your head starts to drop and you jolt yourself awake, shifting nervously in your chair and eyeing Cirrus. You suspect that he might have been facing the other side of the room when you started to doze off. He continues through the text, emphasizing certain points with a strident tone. It's clear that he knows the text well - but due to your lack of familiarity you're having a difficult time parsing the archaic phrasing. At times, you're not even sure it's in a language you know at all. You shift in your seat, fighting against the drowziness that seeps into your bones. You hope that the service will finish soon so you, and the rest of the worshippers, can join in the festivities outside. Your fingers shift on the wrapped candies in your lap and your stomach grumbles quietly. On a whim, you ease the top of the bag open, pressing a candy silently into your mouth. Maybe this will help keep you awake and your hunger at bay until the service is over.

"Silver Light, shining down upon us. We are bleached clean in your light. Glorious Celestial One, we are grateful for your protection in the last year, and returning brightness in this New Year. Before we celebrate your fullness through laughter and festivities, let us take a moment of silence to honor your watchful guidance". Cirrus leans onto the podium with the passion in his words. Everyone in the congregation stills, and the room falls silent. Light falls on Cirrus, draping over him and illuminating his hair like spun silver over his shoulders. He bows his mask towards the floor. You sit quietly, and as the silence stretches onwards, your eyes start to close again. You desperately pry them open, but between the warmth of the building, the dim lighting, and late hour, you soon find your head tilting to the side involuntarily. When your eyes close shut a third time, you desperately reach into your bag of candy for a distraction to help keep you awake.

To your horror, your fingers catch on the edge of the narrow bag, and the contents spill out in front of you, countless candies clattering across the stone floor. They bounce and tumble, each movement sounding thunderous in the silent room. You watch helplessly as the round candies careen across the flagstones, the furthest coming to a standstill at the feet of people three rows ahead of you. Masked faces turn to you curiously as people glance over their shoulders to see what the fuss was. Cirrus's gaze snaps to your face, pinning you in place like a moth on a board. His mouth twists when he sees that you're the one who caused the commotion.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry," you hurriedly breathe, sinking to the floor to gather what candies you can reach without disturbing those around you. The color is high in your cheeks, your hands sticky as you grab the candies nearby and press them into your pockets. Your gaze flits between the candies in front of you, scattered between the shoes of the other attendees but out of reach. You barely hear the end of the service, too mortified to raise your head or focus on Cirrus' words. The back of your shirt is damp with sweat. The congregation rustles to life as the ceremony concludes, the congregation impatient to finally listen to the music and enjoy the celebrations outside. You hover anxiously by your bench, standing and waiting for the rows to clear so you can gather up the mess you made. As the final attendees file out of the building, chatting to each other, Cirrus comes to stand beside you. His irritation rolls off him in waves and you shrink besides him, falling back down onto the bench without a thought.

"It's rather disrespectful, don't you think?" Cirrus says tensely, his words clipped and short. "Bringing food into the service. Distracting the church members. Irreverence on a sacred day. Such gluttony, hm?"

You have never had him this angry with you before, and your hands tremble in your lap where you twist them nervously. "Cir..Cirrus.. Father... Ah, I'm so so sorry, please, I'll clean them up right away. You're right, it was so stupid of me, I shouldn't have brought them in...I - I never meant to drop them, ppplease let me pick them up, I'll do it now..." You chance a look upwards, and the last bit of hope inside of you shrivels. He is silent, his face unmovable.

"You want to pick them up?" He asks softly. You nod, eyes fixed nervously on his face.

"I think your insatiable fingers will simply betray you again".

Your face falls, and you gesture out to him. "Sir.. Cirrus...I'll do it, I'll pick them up. Please, I'll do it right away,"

You sink to your knees and quickly stretch for one candy that's most of the way under the bench nearest to you, fingers scrambling across the dusty floor in your haste. Your heart stops in your throat when Cirrus's heavy, booted foot is placed onto your wrist.

"I said no," he hisses, the flat sole of his foot cruelly twisting against your skin. The bones in your wrist shift under the pressure.

"Your hands are clearly unreliable. And with your voracious hunger and desperation? Hmm, it's only fitting for you to use your mouth".

You lean back on your heels and crane your neck to look at him, wrist still pressed to the floor. "My mouth?"

"Yes. As starving as you are, we had better not let them go to waste." He places his hands behind his back impassively. "Begin."

You nod nervously and he lifts his foot off of your arm. You lower your torso to the floor with your arms, carefully picking up the small candy between your teeth. You can feel his icy gaze on your back. Chewing it quickly, you stoop further under the seats to grab the next nearest candy, shuffling forwards further on your hands. Even under the shelter of the bench, Cirrus's presence looms ominously behind you. You've just picked up the second candy when he speaks again, derision dripping from his words.

"In fact, I think it would be better if you didn't use your hands at all, hm?"

You twist awkwardly from beneath the bench, shuffling your weight back onto your heels. When you pull yourself upright in front of him, you see he's pulled out a narrow black rope. He steps behind you smoothly, pulling your arms behind your back and wrapping the rope around your wrists. A few firm knots later and your wrists are securely bound. Cirrus briefly checks the tightness by sliding the tip of his finger beneath the ropes and then stands.

He peers down at you, his mask an impenetrable shield. He can't keep a sneer from pulling at the edge of his mouth as he speaks. His anger is still palpable. "It suits you, my star. Perhaps this will teach you some restraint, since you are clearly struggling to learn. Continue."

You shift your weight forwards on your knees, testing the rope on your hands. It's tight but not unbearable. If you let your shoulders hang forwards the weight of your arms forces the rope to bite into your skin. But if you clasp your hands behind your back, it's tolerable. You lean all the way forwards, resting your torso on your knees. The spilled candies stretch out before you, some scattered as far as three rows ahead of you. Awkwardly, you scooch forwards, trying to move yourself over to a candy on the right. Your knees already feel sore against the pavement. You have much less control without the use of your hands, and you bash your spine into the underside of the bench. Pain radiates from your back and causes you to lurch forwards. Resignedly, you fully lay down, your torso on the floor and legs stretching out behind you. The floor is gritty and cool against your cheek, and you can feel the solidity of the stone through your clothes.

"There are many more to gather, my star. Best for you to progress quickly. Unless you'd rather I give you some *encouragement*, hmm?"

From the malice in Cirrus' voice, you feel pretty certain that you wouldn't like whatever his encouragement would entail. His foot comes to rest next to your ankle. The threat of it spurs you into action. You gather the candies under this row of pews with haste, twisting and contorting your body around on the stone to gather them in your teeth. The sweet jasmine flavor fills your mouth, polluted now with bits of dirt and sand from the floor. You look from side to side, your neck straining as you peer in the dim lighting. As you go from candy to candy, you pant harshly through your nose, mouth occupied. It’s difficult to progress with any kind of speed despite your efforts, and you work your way slowly across the ground, twisting and bending to shift from place to place. Your knees are starting to get rubbed raw, and your back aches from the strain of your motions. Your movements are becoming less precise as you grow tired, and you find yourself lunging for the candies with little finesse, eager to finish the job. One such motion scrapes the skin off your chin as you fall a bit too heavily on the floor.

Reaching the gap between the benches, you rest your cheek on the floor for a moment. The candies are fewer now, only beneath two wide benches ahead of you. You can feel the sweat stick to your skin. Your back burns, muscles furious from the repeated motion below the pews. Through your efforts, you've gained abrasions on your chin and cheekbone to accompany those on your knees. You close your eyes for a moment, gathering your strength.

Your body jolts when you feel Cirrus' boot come crashing into your ribs. "You think you've earned respite?" He speaks to you lowly, cooly. You squeeze your eyes shut, and find that his voice cuts into you. "You're dirty. Pathetic. Snuffling in the dust for grub like an animal." His disgust for you drips from every word. "Just minutes ago, you begged me to let you clean up. Told me how *quickly* you'd do it." On the last word he swings his leg again, this time slamming it into your gut. You gasp out a choked groan, wheezing. He continues on in a biting murmur. "I suspect that you cared more about currying my favor than righting your wrongs. I am not someone who can be plied with desperate words".

You cough a little, feeling a bruise bloom in your ribs as you do so. "Nno, I - I really am sorry, Cirrus, please, I'll continue. I want to clean it..." You feel a bit disgusted in yourself, but your desire to appease him and shame from your mistake prevails. You inch your way forwards to the next candies, painstakingly making your way beneath the benches. Cirrus walks to the row on the other side of the bench and stands there, waiting for you. You can see the faint shine of his shoes out of the edge of your eyes. Gathering the candies beneath this bench is harder. Your mouth and throat growing parched from your exertion and the endless sugar. You gasp on dust that rises from your movements. At some of the candies you find yourself resting for a moment, before quickly glancing to Cirrus’ feet and continuing again. Your back trembles as you shift forwards and you find yourself using your knees and shoulders more, doing your best to ignore how your skin screams at the friction. You've stopped clasping your hands together and they slump forwards limply, wrists aflame where the rope restricts them.

You start to feel anxious about how much is left. You've finally made it past the second bench. How many more are there? Surely you must be finished soon? You curse yourself. WHY would you be so stupid to try and eat them DURING the service? The delicate Jasmine flavor feels foul and cloying on your tongue. Glancing up desperately, you assess how many you have left to gather and realize that you only have the candies past the third bench to remove. Cirrus has walked ahead of you and stands at the remaining candies that have rolled out from under the bench. You realize, as he starts to move, that he was waiting for your attention.

He carefully lifts his boot and places it on top of the candy, grinding it into dust beneath his foot. With horror, you watch as he does this to each candy one by one, crushing each delicate silver orb into a fine, sugary powder. He drags the toe of his shoe through the mess, gathering it into a pile before he walks to the side. The powder clouds the dark leather. Cirrus waits for you, his expectation clear. Your breath hisses through your teeth as you pull your weary and aching body forwards. Pausing brings greater pain, each point of agony alighting with renewed vigor after the miniscule rest. Your clothes stick to you, damp with sweat and blood from your efforts. Reaching the edge of the powder, you shakily press your tongue into it, trying to pull it into your parched mouth. Your lips crack as you try to clean the mound up, each time leaving dust and damp remnants. You keep returning to it, trying again and again to remove it but only succeeding in spreading it more broadly upon the floor. With how dry your mouth is and your level of exhaustion, you’re unable to pick it up.

Your face slumps onto the stone next to the pile and a sob breaks from your chest. It's too much. There's nothing to be done. Your eyes squeeze shut as hot tears spill down your cheeks, leaving tracks in the grime. You curl up on yourself raggedly, body in a defensive ball. You can feel Cirrus's presence as he comes to stand by your shoulder. His clothes rustle slightly as he crouches. He grabs your chin, fingers sliding slightly through your tears. It's impossible to look at him. His voice feels gentle. "Your efforts, my star, have almost convinced me of your repentance".

"*Please*..." You croak out. You're not sure what you're asking for. His forgiveness, an end to all this, his help, rest.. Ciruss's thumb falls to your cracked lower lip.

"If you need help, you only must ask," he whispers to you.

He pulls your lips open and you feel something cool and wet fall against your tongue. Your eyes spring open to see a thin strand of saliva falling from his lips and into your open mouth. In this moment, it feels like a mercy. His jaw works and you open your mouth further yourself, accepting anything he would offer you. His spit pools in your mouth, almost refreshing after the relentless dust and sugar from the floor. It glints wetly as it falls. His hands slide to the back of your neck, carding through the damp hair at your nape for a moment. He holds the full weight of your head in his hands. His voice is as soft and as firm his fingers.

"So close, my star. You will continue. Leave your guilt behind".

Your heart trembles at that, the promise of forgiveness and his kindness so near.

You feel filthy. You feel beautiful in his touch. You feel like the stone you've spent so long inching across. His fingers slip softly through your hair and lower your head back to the ground. You feel him straighten more than you see it. With the most weariness you've ever felt before, you roll yourself to your front and gather the pile of dust into your mouth slowly, mouthful by mouthful. Your tongue and throat burn and it feels more as if the sugar tears your mouth than it does dissolve. You drag your damp jaw along the gritty floor, realizing at last that the pile is gone.

"You've done well to make amends.", Cirrus says, looking down at you in a heap at his feet.

It's then that your gaze falls to Cirrus's boots, right in front of you. They still have a fine smattering of dust from when he crushed the candies in front of you. Hazily, you blink at them, watching how the sugar dulls the reflection of the lights. With the very last dregs of your resolve, you shift forwards and lave your tongue through the dust on his boot. The boot shifts minutely, a quiet huff of surprise coming from him. You can tell he watches you as you do the best to clean his boots. Your exhaustion means that in some ways, you simply press your face and lips against them devoutly, your damp skin carrying away more grime at times than your mouth.

"What a precious, obedient little bootlicker", he breathes rapturously. "My devoted, gorgeous toy.”

Warmth sweeps through you at that, padding over your many aches and pains like a soft balm. Satisfied with the appearance of his shoes, you lay motionless on the floor. Dimly, as if to someone in a dream, you feel Cirrus unbind your hands and carefully lower your arms by your side. He rubs them gently, hushing you as you mumble in protest. You feel him reach below you and, with a motion that makes the world swing on it's axis, heft you into his arms.

"Is it ok, now?" You can't help but look for reassurance, your mind and body clinging to him as he carries you.

“Yes, little star. You are forgiven.”

--------------

Thanks so much for reading! This fic was inspired by sitting through church services over the holidays and the full moon rn. I was also inspired by this ask to Rotten Racoons (https://www.tumblr.com/rottenraccoons/703263691996545024/will-the-lis-spit-in-vespers-mouth-if-they-asked), which stated Cirrus would spit in Vesper's mouth as a reward for good behavior:D I wanted to manifest the idea of "getting punished for being disruptive in church". If you made it to the end, thank you! I'd love to hear what you thought!

[safetycar-restart]

KINKTOBER DAY 9: 24/7 DYNAMIC [FABIO QUARTARARO X READER]

NOTE: This is an NSFW fic with sub!Fabio and dom!reader. If you're under 18 or uninterested in this, then scroll past. Alternatively, if you like what you read here, check out the rest of my blog :))

This fic is part of a kinktober series where I discuss a different motorsport person with a different kinky thought, and that thought will be discussed more through answering asks on my blog. So if you read this and have some thoughts of your own, feel free to stop by!

Fabio absolutely thrives when he can do 24/7 dynamics with you, when he can just exist with you in a subby headspace for days at a time, focusing only on being a good boy and listening to you. He thrives on praise and love and when you give that to him, he's as happy as can be.

This is by far his favourite way to spend time between races, because it allows him to train and prep for races without getting stuck in his own head? Before you, Fabio had a bad habit of overtraining and getting lost in the pressure and trying to better his riding to the point of exhaustion during races. He just... he wanted to be good enough.

But now his training is worked into 24/7 days with you. His trainer and riding coach give him his clear schedule and diet for the period, and fabio hands it right over to you. He doesn't make his own schedule or decide when he rests or decide when he trains or what he eats. That's for you to decide. His only job is to be a good boy.

His trainer is a little confused when suddenly he's told he has to speak to you about when fabio will be training instead of with fabio himself, but then he meets fabio for the first one of those sessions and he's so so much happier? He's so settled and pleased and does so well and from there none of his trainers question you at all because it's clear that whatever you're doing is making fabio very happy.

He gets all giddy and excited for days leading up to when he knows he'll have some 24/7 days with you, because he's so excited!! The poor thing has had such a stressful season, trying so so hard to be good and failing time and time again because the Yamaha is just not good enough to allow him to succeed.

Which is why having longer 24/7 dynamic periods are so important this year in particular, because he desperately needs some section of his life where he's still good? He needs to do well, needs feel good in something.

And there is nothing that makes him feel better than when you kiss him softly and call him a good boy.

The moment he gets home, he's dropping his bags onto the floor and throwing himself in your arms. You have to catch him or else you'll both go toppling down onto the floor. And so you immediately have a very happy fabio in your arms, giggling and clinging to you and pressing kisses to your neck because he's so excited!! A whole week of no thoughts!! He's so ready!!!

You gently part from him, welcoming him home and giving him a nice kiss before instructing him to unpack all his bags. You sit on the bed and watch him while he does this, because you know he loves having your eyes on him. He's so happy, smiling to himself as he unpacks even though he usually hates unpacking because you told him to! He's listening to you! He's being a good boy!!

Once that's all done, you praise him for being so good and take him to the bathroom to shower together. Needless to say, he starts to get hard cause he's showering with his dom!! You wait until after the shower to give him some relief, giving him a soft hand job while he sits between your legs and whines directly into your ear.

The rest of the week follows the same pattern, with fabio just listening to whatever you tell him to do. He gets fucked so hard he can't remember his own name every night, and then wakes up to breakfast and goes throughout his day just following you.

By the end of the week he's like a whole new person, so much more certain of his own abilities and feeling so much better about himself because he's a good boy! He's your good boy.

[financeprincess]

It is so inspiring hearing about your weight loss :) i was wondering if you had any particular weight loss tips you’d like to share? I went through a period of weight loss myself, but have lately gained back a lot of what I’ve lost and I’d like to know if there’s anything that helped you get back on the wagon. Love your blog btw!

Don’t be too hard on yourself, its rough out here especially in the US. it’s easy to accidentally slip up and gain 15 pounds just by eating a lil extra every day.

Some things that helped me:

Intermittent fasting, only a 13 hour window though. The 16:8 was too much for me and with women it can screw with your hormones if you’re not careful.

Drinking lots of water. Like a ton. I put those hydration multiplier electrolyte packets in my water as well.

Get good quality sleep. I got some Brooklinen sheets and they are 100% worth it. Definitely improved my sleep quality. I also have a really nice down duvet and an Egyptian cotton cover for it. I also have a silk eye mask and a silk pillowcase from Slip that I love. Sleep is extremely important.

Get 10k steps a day or at least just walk as much as you can. I’m sedentary a lot for school/work/etc. so I absolutely have to get out and walk and get moving. Even if you just aim for a mile or two a day it’ll greatly help.

If you don’t want to lift weights that’s okay. It’s not for everyone. I used to be super into powerlifting and got pretty muscular but it doesn’t excite me like it used to. I do a mix now of walking, jogging, pilates, rollerblading, cycling, kickboxing, swimming, yoga, ice skating, and weightlifting. That way I’m never bored and the variety allows me to choose what I want to do.

Consistency is key. Doing 4 workouts a week at a light/medium intensity is better than doing 1-2 a week of super high intensity and burning yourself out. Every little bit helps.

I do a full body stretch every day. This is super important. Our bodies get so stiff during the day. If you don’t stretch this can lead to injuries when you try to do other things.

I love the sauna (and hot yoga too). If you can find and afford a gym that has a sauna, I would highly recommend. Sometimes I will just go and walk on the treadmill for 30-45 minutes and watch YouTube videos and then sit in the sauna. It’s the best.

Make sure you’re not deficient in anything. Take a complete multivitamin and get blood work done. I was severely deficient in vitamin D and it was making me depressed. Once I took a supplement, got more sun and got my levels up it really helped my overall health.

Cut out grains, sugar, junk food, fried foods, etc. and just eat real foods. Anything with a long ingredient list usually isn’t a good idea. It’ll take a minute to get used to it but once you start eating almost exclusively vegetables, fruits, proteins, and healthy fats you won’t miss it. I have such a big sweet tooth sometimes I’ll have to eat like five servings of berries with a few tablespoons of honey just to satisfy it, but that’s better than ice cream or candy any day.

Don’t deprive or starve yourself. I eat as healthy as I can manage 80-90% of the time. But every once and a while I will eat a huge plate of pasta, gelato, tiramisu, croissants, those types of foods that I love. It’s not helpful to punish yourself and you gotta live a little.

I got a smart scale in my bathroom, the one I got is from FitIndex. It has an app that connects to your phone and it syncs to other health apps. it shows you body fat, muscle mass, water weight, everything. Honestly super triggering at first because I felt called out lol but now I step on it once a week just to make sure I’m on the right track.

You do not need a gym membership to workout. YouTube is the best. I love Yoga with Adrienne, MadFit, Move with Nicole, Charlie Follows, Vicky Justiz, and there’s a bunch of others. Find what you like and try to stick with it as much as you can.

Rest is super important. Don’t run yourself ragged. If you’re sore don’t force yourself to workout.

MyFitnessPal is super helpful. If you have a history of disordered eating this might not be for you but it’s good to be conscious of what you’re eating. Figure out what you need to lose fat/maintain/gain muscle and then track to see where you’re at and adjust accordingly.

Eat more protein. Protein, healthy fats, and fiber keep you full. You will be starving if you eat only salads. Fruit smoothies with protein, protein oats, salmon, yogurt, eggs, etc.

Get cute workout gear. It makes it more fun for me to workout with my pink towels, my pink hydroflask, my lululemon yoga mat, I have a baby blue jumprope and pink dumbbells and pastel colored resistance bands for at home workouts. A lot of my workout clothes are from lululemon, alo yoga, free people, and aerie. I have some of those blender bottles in cute colors for preworkout, protein powder, super greens powder, electrolyte mixes, etc. Some of this stuff is pricy but I’d rather be investing in my health than paying medical bills down the road so it’s 100% worth it to me.

The only way to see permanent change is to make it a lifestyle. Unfortunately you can’t just go back to eating unhealthy foods once you hit a certain goal. Those models who say they live exclusively off of pizza and pasta and cheeseburgers are lying through their teeth. It’s perfectly healthy to have days off where you indulge or don’t exercise but most of the time you’ll have to find ways to eat healthy and exercise and prioritize your health.

[storiesofsvu]

Love Comes Quietly Ch 8

Alex Blake x reader warnings: language, alcohol, brief mentions of bau work. we're finally getting there folks! this chapter does jump around a bit, starts off immediately following the last chapter, then jumps a week, then jumps another like, two weeks (ish, use your imagination) but time has gone by. next ch will pick up directly after this one

Neither you nor Alex said a word about her falling asleep in your bed, you were more than well aware that she’d spent the night there, you’d half woken up a couple of times to find yourself securely tucked in her embrace. But it had been a long week, a rough case all around, you chalked it up to an exhausted accident. Though, you would be lying if you said you didn’t want it to happen again.

Alex wasn’t necessarily embarrassed about it, but she thought that you might be, or that it might have just been a little bit of an awkward conversation to have upon waking up. So she was happy to have slipped out before you’d realized and she wasn’t about to bring it up. She wasn’t sure if it was just sheer exhaustion getting the best of her, or if she’d been lulled into slumber by being in someone’s embrace again. While she’d had a couple of dates that lead nowhere, and a couple of very brief hook ups since James, there hadn’t been an overnight stay, it had been an incredibly long time since she’d shared a bed with someone.

While she made her morning coffee she chewed on her lip, thinking about how much more enjoyable life had been since you’d moved to town. How much fun daily life was, how much she truly loved having you around the house. You made things easier, she had less work to do around the house from cooking to cleaning to mowing the lawn. She knew that you usually took on a few more tasks than normal because you felt a little guilty about not paying rent and she knew that you were likely going to deep clean the entire house this weekend with how downtrodden you were right now. She made a mental note to not leave you alone in the house so she could at least help you with whatever insane task you would decide to take on. She found her thoughts wandering, subconsciously comparing having you around to back when James still lived here, whenever he wasn’t halfway across the world. Before she really realized what she was thinking about she was torn from her thoughts at the sound of your bedroom door clicking open and your feet padding down the hardwood floor.

“Morning.” You greeted with a soft smile and she felt a blush creep up her neck.

“Morning.” She replied, tossing you a small smile as she turned back to the coffee maker, pulling down your preferred mug, “coffee?”

“Please.” You yawned, rolling your neck to stretch out the stiff muscles, wincing a bit at the pain in your side as you did so. Alex slid your coffee mug across the island and you muttered a quiet thanks before taking your first sip, moaning softly as it coursed through you and the caffeine started to wake you up, “hey.. uh..” you started, eyes flicking between Alex and your drink, “thank you… for yesterday. I.. dunno how I would’ve handled it without you.” You could feel the heat on your cheeks when you finally glanced up at her.

“Of course.” Alex smiled warmly, “I wouldn’t have wanted you to have to deal with that on your own. How’re you feeling today?”

“Better.” You replied with a sigh, “and I did wake up with my period so that probably explains a lot.”

“I knew there had to be a reason why I woke up with the burning desire to go buy more ice cream.” She replied with a grin, turning to the cupboard behind her to grab the Midol, tossing it to you. “And I don’t think hormones had anything to do with what happened in that warehouse.”

“Yeah but I can blame the rest of it on them, right?” You nearly winced and she chuckled.

“Just don’t beat yourself up about it, okay?”

“Promise.” You gave her a small smile, wishing you could control the heat in your cheeks as she gazed across the island at you. “Have you eaten yet? Cause I’m pretty sure I’m going to die if I don’t have French toast, I was gonna order in.”

“I picked up some brioche the other day, I can make some.” She offered with a shrug.

“Oh, okay.” You placed your coffee down on the counter, “milk, eggs, vanilla and cinnamon, right?” You made to move around the counter and she held up a hand in offence.

“Ah, absolutely not.” You stalled at her words, your brow furrowing, and she laughed softly, “your cramps are always the worst on your first day, go get comfortable.” She gestured toward the couch, grabbing the heating pad from the top of the microwave before tossing it in.

“You sure?”

“Yeah. Besides, I need to know what happens next on Love Island.”

You let out a little laugh, the grin remaining on your cheeks as you picked up your coffee, retreating over to the couch.

*

It was a whirlwind of a week, barely any recovery time between cases, though, that had become relatively normal for the BAU. At least this one was local so you didn’t have to worry about shitty hotels and endless work hours. You were still a little worse for wear so Emily kept you out of the field and honestly, you appreciated the little bit of a break. By the time Friday rolled around everyone was grateful for the case being closed and it being the weekend, briefly saying goodbye to each other before going separate ways.

Dinner was take out, ate on the couch while mindless television played to distract the both of you before you were yawning. Your sleep schedule had been a little off and despite it still being early, you retired to your room at the insane hour of eight thirty.

Alex’s mind was still spinning, trying to wrap around everything that had been happening. She smiled softly at you when you said goodnight, her gaze returning to the tv as she got distracted. Three hours later she realized she should probably get some rest, picking up the containers and plates from the coffee table. She spent a bit tidying up around the house, making sure the dishwasher was full and turned on, that the trash was set outside to be taken out in the morning. She unpacked both of you go bags into the laundry to be done in the morning before she finally stripped out of her clothes into cozy pyjamas and curled under her blankets.

Her brain was on fire, it didn’t seem to want to stop, even after the melatonin she took. Every time she closed her eyes she tried to relax herself into sleep, but there was something keeping her awake. She tossed and turned for a couple of hours until she finally let out a frustrated groan and picked up her phone. After scrolling through it for a while she let out a yawn, thinking maybe she was about to win now that her thoughts had calmed but once she was curled up on her side her brain started running wild again and she huffed. Her head swiveled over to the clock, it was nearing three in the morning and she was nowhere near tired. She rolled her eyes, shoving back the blankets as she shifted from the bed, she had some sleepy time tea that hopefully would help the situation, so she made her way out to the kitchen.

She only flicked on the stove light, wanting to make sure she didn’t disturb you as she turned on the kettle and pulled down a mug. She ran a hand over her face, her mind wandering as she let out a sigh, it was as if her subconscious knew there was something else going on but wasn’t ready to explain it to her yet. She caught the kettle right before it was about to whistle, pouring the steaming water into the mug, stirring it as it steeped. She settled into a stool at the island, her hand reaching out to the book of poetry she’d left there earlier right as she heard the sound of a door clicking and her head shot up in the direction of your room.  A few seconds later you appeared in the hallway, stalling in your steps when you saw her, a sheepish smile on your face.

“You’re still up.” You greeted softly, your voice groggy with sleep, moving toward the sink with your water bottle.

“It appears so are you.” She smiled back, taking a sip of her tea.

“Was dead to the world.”

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” She asked, worry etching her features and you chuckled.

“No.” You filled up your bottle, “you okay?”

“Yeah.” Alex brushed it off, “I guess insomnia just strikes again.”

“You sure?” You raised a brow, “it was a pretty tough case. If you wanna talk about it, you know I’m here right?”

“I do.” She smiled softly before taking a sip of her tea, “I don’t think it’s the case that’s bothering me.”

“What’s up?” You asked, curiosity taking over your face as you leant against the island.

“Oh you don’t need to worry about it.” Alex laughed it off, “it’s stupid.”

“Alex, c’mon.” You laughed, “we’re both up in the middle of the night, if the universe wanted something, it’s this conversation.”

“Fine.” She shot a glare your way that was somehow combined with a smirk as she took a heavy breath, “I… god…. I’ve had trouble sleeping, and honestly I think it’s just the empty bed that’s been bugging me. After so many years, it’s been hard to sleep alone, even if he wasn’t around all the time.”

“I believe that.” You replied, a soft expression on your features as you looked across to her and she softened, smiling gently at you. “I mean, don’t ask me why but I’ve always slept better with someone I care about in my bed, even if it’s sleep talking, snoring, leg kicking Emily.”

Alex barked out a laugh at that, watching you for a moment as your lips curved up into a grin before she spoke, “god… this is awkward to ask…”

“What?” You asked with a sleepy laugh, taking another sip of your water.

“Would it be weird if I asked if you maybe wanted to sleep in my room?” She winced, “just tonight, I promise. I just… I think it might help? I wouldn’t normally ask but that night I fell asleep in your bed was the best sleep I’ve had since the divorce…and… it was a week from hell this week.”

Alex was instantly relieved by the laugh that you let out, the slight blush on your cheeks as you ducked your gaze. You were simply trying your best to figure out your own thoughts, attempting to not blush to hard at the thought of sharing a bed with Alex, and on purpose this time.

“Honestly…” you glanced up with a smile, “I haven’t slept that good in years.” You laughed, “so yeah. Plus your bed has that memory foam topper.”

Alex laughed, the smile on her lips as she turned toward her bedroom, though the jitters didn’t stop as she was leading you to her bedroom. You easily slipped under the covers, taking the spot beside her and nestling into the pillows. Both you and Alex were unsure where the boundary of touch came into play so you started out facing opposite ways, the warmth and weight of another body enough to finally lull the two of you to sleep.

For now, that was all you needed.

**

The team found themselves in a dive bar across the street from the hotel in Phoenix, Emily having made the call to stay overnight to have time to wind down and relax a bit after solving an easier case. She played a couple rounds of pin ball with you before Derek managed to steal you away for the now free pool table. Grabbing a fresh drink, she settled in at the bar beside Alex who was sipping on her beer and absentmindedly ripping up the coaster it was supposed to be sitting on.

Emily had almost expected her to say something when she sat down, but Alex remained silent, her gaze lingering in the direction of the pool table. Emily followed her eyeline, watching as you bent over the pool table to take a shot before her eyes drifted back to Alex and a smirk took over her lips.

“Her ass really does look great in those shorts.”

“What?” Alex nearly jumped, the coaster clattering to the bar top, “I’m not..”

“Really?” Emily laughed, “cause I know you’re not looking at Derek like that.”

“I’m not looking like anything.”

“Your pupils are dilated.”

“It’s dark in here.” She defended, taking a sip of her beer, fingers picking up the coaster again, picking at its edge as she tried to fight the blush creeping up her chest. Emily chuckled, glancing between you and Alex briefly, watching the way that Alex’s eye’s narrowed, her head tilting every so slightly while two little lines formed between her eyes. The look she usually got when she was deep in concentration on a case trying to get inside an unsubs mind and way of thinking.

“Hey…” Emily nudged her elbow, her voice softer now, the tease gone from it, “what’s going on?”

“Nothing.” Alex sighed, her gaze dropping from you to the coaster, continuing to tear at it before she took another sip of her drink.

“If you’re hung up on the case, don’t be. You did incredible work this week, and we got that girl back with her parents.”

“Oh, no, it’s not that.” She waved her off with a shake of her head.

“Oh c’mon.” She laughed softly, “I know that faraway look, you’ve got something on your mind.” She watched as Alex’s brow furrowed once more while she looked in your direction, “everything okay at home?”

“Yeah, of course. She’s perfect, it’s perfect.” Alex corrected herself, but not fast enough for Emily to miss it, her lips curving up into a grin. She sighed softly, glancing down to the bar top to find the coaster finally ripped into tiny little pieces that she could no longer distract herself with. “I’m just trying to figure something out and I’ve been a little conflicted on it, I’m really not sure about a couple of things.”

“Okay. Talk me through it.” Emily urged gently and the other woman let out a breath, draining her beer and replacing it with a new on. Alex’s eyes darted across the bar again, catching Derek cheering, taunting in your direction as you rolled your eyes at him, hanging up the pool cue in defeat. You reluctantly high fived him, and then moved to pick up your jacket, deciding it was time to leave. She let out a breath, finally looking up to catch Emily’s gaze.

“I’ve been trying to differentiate between what could just be the comfort of having someone around the house all the time, the domestic feel of the whole situation, relying on each other, what could be just platonic affection and… the possibility that maybe there’s something more there.”

“Ah… so this is about Murphy.” She chuckled and Alex scowled in her direction.

“And you’re right, her ass looks spectacular in those shorts.” She busied herself with her drink while Emily barked out a laugh.

“Alright, so there’s some sexual attraction, we’re off on the right foot.”

“Okay, but where is the difference in sexual attraction and finding someone conventionally attractive?”

“Well, do you think she’s pretty or do you want to stick your tongue down her throat?” Emily asked and Alex nearly choked on her beer.

“Valid question but I’ll raise you this, where is the line drawn? Is this just because she’s always around and I’m lonely, sexually frustrated, is it just out of pure convenience?”

“When was the last time you got laid?”  She asked, watching as Alex’s brow furrowed, letting out a groan.

“A month or two after James left, when I finally had the house to myself.”

“Blake that was almost two years ago!”

“Do you really have to remind me?” She asked with a laugh.

“How often do you masturbate?”

It was Alex’s turn to laugh, practically rolling her eyes at the other woman, “not often. It’s tough being on a nearly identical schedule, doesn’t leave much alone time in the house for either of us.”

“Well,” Emily placed her empty cup down onto the bar, sliding off her stool, “I think your best bet right now is to get yourself off.” She squeezed at Alex’s shoulder, “and if you’re thinking about her while you’re doing it? Congrats you figured out your problem.”

Alex chuckled softly, shaking her head at Emily’s antics while she watched the other woman leave the bar. Not long after she finished her own beer and made the trip back to the hotel room. Naturally, Emily had her bunking with you and she was unsurprised to find you changed into pyjamas (including shorts that left even less to the imagination than the ones you’d had on earlier) sitting on your bed, television on while you flipped through a magazine.

“Hey.” You muttered, not glancing up when she entered the room.

“I take it Morgan won?”

“By a landslide.” You replied with a groan, glancing up just in time to catch Alex unbuttoning her shirt and heat surged to your cheeks. You gulped, quickly looking back down to the magazine. Sure, you lived together, you roomed together on trips and honestly had routinely changed in the same room before but there was something different in the air tonight. You chalked it up to the alcohol and the fact that one night of bed sharing had lead to basically every night you were at home, the comfort of another body helping both of you get much better sleep. You made out Alex’s voice but you were so focussed trying to ignore the fact that she was in her bra in front of you, you were practically hallucinating.

“I’m going to shower; did you want to join?”

“What?!” Your head shot up, eyes wide and her brow furrowed as she chuckled.

“I said I’m going to shower; did you want the bathroom first?”

“Oh!” Your heart rate began to return to normal, “no, I’m good, go for it.”

She disappeared into the bathroom with a click of the lock and you let out a quiet groan, dropping your head into your hands.

*

Emily was faintly aware of sunlight creeping through the hotel blinds, what she was suddenly very aware of was the panicked knocking at her door. Her heart leapt in her chest, wondering if this was work related as she crawled out of the bed and half ran to the door, pulling it open her brow furrowed at the sight of you in the doorway.

“I think we have a problem.”

“Oh god, what happened?”

“I think I have a crush on Alex…”

____________________

@svulife-rl @clarawatson @hbkpop @momlifebehard @alexusonfire @itisdoctortoyousir @temilyrights @alexxavicry @evilregal2002 @alcabots @ladysc @dextur @disneyfan624 @augustvandyne @supercriminalbean @lex13cm @prentiss-theorem @happenstnces @whiteberryx @heidss @geekyandgay98 @onmykneesformarvel l @inlovewithemilyprentiss @desperate-gay @amypoehlfey @overtrred28 @emobabeyy @1974-sp @theclassicgaycousin @kalixxa @leftoverenvy @bigolgay @daddy-heather-dunbar @regalmilfs4me @scorpsik @riveramorylunar

[butmakeitgayblog]

i don’t have a uterus so forgive my ignorance but… 2 weeks??? 😭 i thought it was one wtf have i been lied to

That absolutely is a lie pushed on society by big pharma and the industrial complex (don't fact check me on this) I mean everyone is different snd everyone has their own fun little insanity inducing ~quirks~ to their cycle, but most people I've known who have periods usually have the week or so leading up to the period where you are either extremely hungry or hate the sight of food, ya bloat, boobs are sore, ya get so fucking horny that a bitch gets close to licking their own phone if someone hot enough scrolls through. And none of that covers potential skin issues, sleeping issues, depression issue, etc.

Then the actual period begins 😒 which is a whole other clusterfuckery bag of systems to deal with. And they say 2-7 days. If you just felt like you heard an echo in the distance, that was the feral wildbeast screech of every person who is on day 9 of their period. Who thought they were done and went back to regular clothes only to fUCKING START SPOTTING AGAIN 😤

And none of that even begins to account for anomalies like endometriosis or polycystic ovarian syndrome which can lead to even longer periods, more frequent periods, intensely painful periods (think stabbing pain. Burning pain. Feeling like your lower intestines are being wrung out like a wash towel.)

And we do this every month. While working. And cleaning. And cooking. And being general useful members of society.

My point in all this being, everything you've ever learned as a "generalized rule" about periods is a gotdamn lie and just, just listen to people who have periods when they say it's hell and we deserve to nap, complain, and eat our little treats in peace

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 720.5: Hayatani-san wants to observe

Pag 1

1: At Sohoku High School

It's lunch break!!

Three anpan!

Here, your change is 40 yen

Hurry up!!

2: There is a school store!!

Ohh, do you remember? Look, this store's.... that's right!! I'm Hayatani Yuuko (44)!!

They still have a special yaki!!

3: Yes

Yees

Here, your change is 100 yen

Amazing, she's so fast!!

Ah!! But in my heart I'm 24 years old!! Day after day I quickly hand bread to satsify the hungry students' stomaches!!

4: I keep a close eye both on the bread and the students' movements

The Thousand-armed Kannon Yuuko is kind to everyone!!

Boy, guve that bread to that girl, please

Thank you so much!

5: During lunch break the store is so chaotic, but

Alright, the melon bread is sold out!

Do you have the cocoa bread?

Pag 2

1: Other times are unexpectedly free

2: Between second and thrid period, when the sunlight hits just right, it feels so good

Ahh, I wonder what song is tha5

3: You seriously have never eaten daifuku at that store, Sugimoto-san!?

It's because I'm not close to it, my class is on the other side

4: I'll buy it this time, really!

You said this the other day too

Ah, the boy with orange hair from the bicycles team

At that time I get read for lunch break while watching the students

5: It's the boy who always comes to get a “special yaki life”

6: I always buy more!! But then I eat it before I give it to you!!

…. yeah yeah

7: The boy noext to him is in the bicycles team too, like Naruko-kun

Pag 3

1: Maybe he brings a lunch box? He never comes to buy bread, but he comes to buy stationery....

Do you have.... uhm, the sharp lead for a mechanical pen?

The 0.5mm B ones... next week the first years students have their first exams, so I want them to be prepared

2: He seemed like a polite and reliable guy

I wonder if he a third year already...

3: Right now, his back definitely looks like that of a senpai taking good care of his kouhai

Then let's go together this time, together

Yeah!!

So you can't eat it yourself on the way, right?

Yeah, Sugimoto-san you're a genius!

4: Yo

Ah, Imaizumi

Imaizumi-san

Listen, now with Sugimoto-san...

5: Do we put these components on the desk in the clubroom?

Yeah, thank you

6: Ah.... I know that boy too, he's so tall....

7: I'm sure....

Excuse me

Pag 4

1: May I ask? Do you have a clear A4 holder?

He's Sohoku's bicycles racing team captain, Imaizumi-kun!!

2: As expected, the aura of the two times national champion is on another level

Hayatani-san guessed it wrong

3: I have it, an holder for A4 documents

He has to callect the club's documents, since he's the captain

He's not the captain though

4: You're going this year too? To the nationl competition

6: You mean the Inter High?

That's right!!

Pag 5

1: We still have the qualifiers to do

So we can't say anything, but we plan to go – me, Naruko

2: and our captain Onoda!!

4: He.... people usually tend to think that he's strange and unreliable, and he himself said “maybe I should show a more dignified attitude to the first years”

But during practice his eyes are really different

Huh?

Huh!?

Huh!?

5: “Captain”?

But? Isn't that you!?

6: He himself doesn't realize it, and that's why everyone follows him

Pag 6

1: I think we're going, to the Inter High!!

Because it's like he's making “promises” with all sorts of guys!!

And he's the kind of guy who will do his everything to keep a promise

2: Onoda!!

Pag 7

1: No no, you mean you're Onoda-kun!?

Huh!? Imaizumi-kun!? No, I got it wrong, Onoda-kun is a boy wearing glasses!!

2: The boy that won two times in a row and  that Naruko-kun said it's the captain!!

3: Ehiii!

4: Imaizumi-kun

5: Ah, the first year with the pretty smile from the other day... no, he's a third year!

6: Ah, you know him?

I gave him bread when he needed it the other day

Imaizumi-kun, you know him too?

Yeah, he's....

Pag 8

1: Kya-!

Our capt-

2: Don't fall over for nothing

So-sorry, Imaizumi-kun

He gave him a hand right away, eh... he's so nice

4: Ehi! You really have lots of amazing friends!!

7: Yes!!

8: They announced a new season of Love Hime!

Ehh...

9: Ah... I failed to catch that boy's name once again

Hayatani-san was still looking forward to “meet” Onoda

[jakesangel]

how to know if you are full when you’re eating? i still dont know how to know it

hai anon bby <3

i used to struggle w it, specially when i started to watch healthier. i used to eat lot of inflammatory food that would always makes me feel full so when i started to eat more healthy it was hard ᵎ what helped me was to drink water before n after my meal n to wait for around 20 minutes after my meal to check if i'm still hungry. if i'm not then i can just go in my day, if i am then i have a snack. also i try to not listen to my body munch ㅎㅎ like if i planned to have my usual meal w my usual dessert then that's all i have. i'll wait til next time n will jsut drink tea or coffee. but that cal also tell you that u aren't eating enough or doesn't have enough calories. so i either have more carbs in my meal or just have a bigger portion the next time. here some tips :

eating slowly ᵎᵎ your brian doenst wokr as fast as your stomach, so even if finished eating your brain will tell you more tho u're full. this will prevent such happening ᵎᵎ

start w protein n finish w carbs, protein makes u full for a longer period of time but it doesn't start right away whereas carbs are more like 'in the moment energizer'

slowly decrease your portion size/ calories as to not face a too hard challenge right away ᵎ this is only make you binge even if u can last a day or too or even a week, u will end up binging.

eat something you enjoy ᵎᵎ it's actually proven scientifically but basically if you don't eat something you enjoy, u're gonna be disappointed n will be moslt likely try to find something else to eat, but as u just eaten it will lead to the feeling of over fullness

some people use mindful eating. it doesn't work for me but you should look it up n try ᵎ

thunder training ᵎ that was worked for me but i feel like i didnt explained myself well. basically it's to eat at the same time everyday the same meal the same amount. this will train ur stomach n ur brain to be used of that you want to eat. it will also help you w craving as ur brain will slowly only want that n not bad stuff u want to get rid off ᵎ

[lonelyroommp3]

hello person with probable-but-not-diagnosed PCOS here can you elaborate on the dairy because...... that would explain some stuff!!!

oh i just have like a mild dairy intolerance so i always break out a bit when i eat it. when i'm not eating dairy (i usually try to be as vegan as possible but will make exceptions if i have no other options for food) i still get a few standalone zits here and there bc my skin's quite sensitive but i will only have a full on breakout 1) roughly around the week that i'm ovulating and 2) in the week leading up to my period. issue right now is i can't tell if my current breakout is hormonal (& therefore very-nearly-confirmed pcos related) seeing as my period is overdue so now would be a logical time for that to happen OR if it's a result of me having been in monaco/france over the weekend and eating a lot more dairy than i normally would 😭 or simply the two combined which would be very rude of my body at a time like this

so basically i doubt very much that my dairy intolerance and What Is Looking 99% Like It Might Be PCOS are actually related BUT if you're not sure if your own acne is pcos or dairy related it might be worth, as an experiment (<- i am not a medical professional and this is not official medical advice) cutting down on (or cutting out) dairy entirely for a cycle or two and seeing if your breakouts clear

mostly or entirely [you're probably just a bit dairy intolerant esp if you find your digestion improves at the same time]

not at all [likely another cause which may or may not be hormonal]

on and off depending on where you are in your cycle [almost definitely hormonal acne]

[gregorvorbarra]

I just realized I never gave you all a Lee Update

So,

Lee tore is Cranial Cruciate Ligament in his right knee. The vet thinks it’s been torn for a while because he has some mild arthritis in the knee now, but we noticed him limping in mid-October. It didn’t stop him from trying to be insane though.

He had Tibial Plateau Levelling Osteotomy this past Tuesday to fix it. I know not everyone wants to read surgical stuff so details on that and how it went under the cut, but Lee is doing well so far!

Enjoy this picture of Lee in jammies:

So the TPLO involves cutting the tibia and rotating it and reattaching it with a metal plate, to stabilize the knee joint. The torn ligament is removed completely. It has a really good success rate, with no post-op complications or need for long term pain management. Which is great!

Bad news is that it’s a 12-week recovery process, and Lee is going to be on “crate” rest through most of that. We don’t have a crate for him anymore, so… he’s confined to the guest room when we’re not home.

Sad!

Lee was apparently very very good at the vet the whole time. Here’s a pic the vet sent us:

Good job Lee! Best Boy.

He’s been doing well since he got home! He was Very High when he got home on Tuesday, and cried a lot, but he’s been okay since then. He’s been trying to get up and follow people around the house, which he CANNOT be doing, so we’ve had to sedate him to make sure he’s resting as he should. I’m amazed by how well he’s moving just a few days post-surgery, but I know that he needs to just SIT so that his leg actually heals. Just because he’s trying to walk doesn’t mean he actually should be. (Had an argument with my dad over this, but I won’t go into that.)

I got a pet camera so that we could check up on him while we’re not home. Best decision, no regrets, and I got a great deal on it, too.

Check out this picture from last night:

Lee, please sleep on your bed, thanks.

He’s also been reluctant to eat, so I’m having to add chicken broth to his meals. THANKS LEE!

It is EXTREMELY common for dogs with one CCL tear to blow their other knee within a year or so. So we will likely have to do this again, but I am looking up ways to try to prevent (or at least delay) it. What I’ve learned so far:

- Steps/staircases for getting onto high surfaces (beds, furniture, etc, stuff they use frequently) helps a lot.

- Rugs on hardwood/tile/slippery floors is also helpful. Gives them more traction and prevents them from slipping. (Especially when they’re going to be jumping onto something, like furniture.)

- Keeping nails short, again to prevent slipping.

I already have steps for the bed from when Lee was refusing to jump, and I’m getting some rugs. Lee usually keeps his nails very short, but I think being on crate rest for 8 weeks will lead to some long nails, so nail clipping time.

Overall, I’m very optimistic about the outcomes of this, but the recovery period’s going to suck a bit.

Anyways, thats the update on Lee! Thanks for reading, pls wish Lee the best right now. And if you have any advice, I’D LOVE TO HEAR IT!!!

[honeysuckle-venom]

I've noticed an interesting correlation between the week leading up to my period/the week of my period and increased food issues. I always have food issues, I have disordered eating primarily due to very intense food focused OCD, and it sucks in general. But it gets way way worse before and during my period. Which is also when I'm the hungriest and have more cravings than usual. And it's just awful because the two impulses are fighting like crazy and I end up fucking calorie counting while desperately trying to figure out how to allow myself some chocolate and oh my god it sucks soooo much. I spend hours per day on food-rule-calculations even on normal days, but right now? It's amped up to 11 and it's driving me batshit.

[babyspacebatclone]

Welcome to “Tomorrow will be soul destroying, I have a fic idea, write as much as I can to feel happy!” rough drafts!

Companion to This Ficlet (Don’t Tell My Wife about the Tanks; She Thinks I’m Fishing with my Brothers) all the way at the bottom of the thread

Three Weeks in Etheria from Entrapta’s Perspective

“Entrapta, I wish to inform you I shall be - travelling with my brothers for… an unforeseen amount of time.”

The Dryl Princess looked up at Hordak from the circuit board she’d been soldering, smiling brightly beneath her mask.

“That sounds great! Family bonding activity?” she guessed.

Hordak repeated the words carefully, rolling each in his mouth as though none were familiar.

She clarified. “A planned enjoyable activity or series of activities shared with family members with the intention of reinforcing emotional bonds, trust, and happiness within the group.”

While the actual activities Scorpia had described to her had failed to sound particularly enjoyable or capable of achieving the desired result, Entrapta had found the concept itself fascinating and worth further exploration when time was convenient.

Approximately a third of Hordak’s clone Brothers had begun attempts at engaging in an Etherian lifestyle, with a third of those being able to be defined as “Great Success” by Entrapta’s reasoning and most of the remaining “Working towards Success.”

Hordak himself, however, had struggled greatly between his desire to help his Brothers and own feelings of awkwardness towards social interactions. To this point, Kadroh had taken the largest lead in encouraging healthy activities within the group, and Entrapta was thrilled Hordak was feeling a desire to participate.

Her lover frowned, the fine distinction that indicated “contemplating” instead of the more typical “exhausted frustration.”

“Is it still a - ‘family bonding activity’ if the event is one where… you are not enjoying the activity itself, but will feel a shared sense of satisfaction upon completing success?”

“Yep!” Entrapta beamed with confidence. From her understanding, the intention of shared time and experience mattered more than the activity itself, and when working with Hordak’s brothers “enjoyment” was often still a very sensitive, if not panic-inducing topic.

Hordak gave a sharp, wide grin of pleasure. “Then yes. My brothers and I shall be gone for an unforeseen, but hopefully short, period of time on a ‘Family Bonding Activity’ where we seek a successful completion of our objectives.”

“Awesome!” Entrapra was already turning on her blowtorch again.

Kadroh had been getting a lot of training from Adora about engaging in healthy, appropriate activities.

She could trust the group would be safe until notified otherwise.

linebreak

Entrapta had intended to keep her communication pad with her while Hordak was gone, but like usual when she picked it up to go eat with Imp that evening, it was muted. She shrugged as she checked her messages; anything important, Hordak would have contacted her through the Castle’s interface.

There was no messages from Hordak, which was a good sign; no trouble he couldn’t handle, and engaged enough he wasn’t lonely!

The forty three awaiting video messages from Perfuma, however, was completed baffling.

Perfuma sat firmly in the status of “Close Friend’s Romantic Partner” in Entrapta’s social hierarchy. While technically she had more historical grievances with Catra than the Plumerian Princess, she also shared both more positive activities and interests with the catgirl.

This left Perfuma in a position where Entrapta viewed her either neutrally or as an annoyance, but one she was required to be polite to and had a great personal desire to achieve the latter for the wellbeing of Scorpia.

So, it was with resolve and only a little teeth grinding she opened the first message.

It was closed before two seconds had past, teeth grinding significantly harder.

This was an issue. The speech to text program she had developed to deal with undesired but necessary video and audio messages was under normal circumstances excellent, but showed a great weakness attempting to transcribe emotional distress.

And in those two seconds, in was clear Perfuma had worked herself into a hysterical meltdown.

No messages from Scorpia, at least; this shouldn’t be due to an issue with the romantic relationship.

Entrapta would have the transcription program run while she and Imp ate, and attempt to decipher the results later.

It couldn’t be that important.