#i was mostly just baffled at the lack of thought tbh

[spideywhites]

Just came from reading the latest chapter of COS. And after screaming and crying my head out in different directions, all I have to say is... You are an amazing writer and I have faith in you.

Like we got glimpses into Naruto's mentality and disastrous coping mechanisms and the frustrations and hurt simmering between both the twins. This coupled with that horrendous heir contract for Natsume looming in the future has set up a tense stage.

But. Naruto already has grown leaps and bounds compared to how he was in canon at this stage. And I don't mean it solely in terms of skill level. So tbh with the way you are exploring and gutting canon I won't be surprised if he were to grow up even further emotionally as a person.

Cuz let's be honest- the moment Naruto chose to continue to love Konoha, after knowing every fucked up thing they did to Sasuke... I knew his character was being stagnated. To the point I was baffled when Yami Naruto came and Naruto actually got furious at his mom being exported from Uzu to be made into a Jinchuuriki. He is optimistic like Minato (in the sense of knowing how the world is shit but choosing to love it anyways), but mostly because of his horrifically low self esteem and unhealthy coping behaviours (which ok I understand. Cus the choice is between bad and worse). The brainwashing in his academy years and the way the public treated him has just fed into the mindset of rationalising away everything bad and the idea that he is the problem. Vs. Natsu is cynical like Kushina.

Coming back, Naruto's reaction regarding his Mom...makes me think that...when he will learn and understand the full depth of the shit Natsume was put through....he is gonna have a reaction similar to Sasuke (not sure about the I wanna raze Konoha to ground part though lol)

I have a feeling that canon is going to be thoroughly thrown off its rails by the time Shippuden were to arrive (or maybe even before that). Cuz Naruto and Natsume can have their growth arcs, if they are still stuck in the village that is hurting them and leeching off them

This was a brilliant chapter!!

First off, thanks for reading and all your thoughts! I’m glad this chapter was suitably scream-worthy lol. I’ve been trying my best to add in realism outside of the general canon-divergence, because as much as I love the nostalgia of Naruto, it’s lacking a bit when it comes to character depth, a sense of intimacy in relationships (of any kind), and just that good, slow burning build of friendship and maturity.

There’s going to be a lot more divergence ahead! That’s really all I can say tbh! I fear they’ve been trapped in stagnation for too long, it’s time for shit to hit the fan….

[presidenthades]

So... 😳🤯

What did you think of episode 3?

I’m starting to realize I have a pattern in my general opinion of the episodes. When you look at scenes and dialogue at an individual level, it can be pretty great. The writers are churning out a lot of moments that are destined to become screenshots, quotes, GIFs, and memes that get reposted a lot on social media. But if you step back and look at the big picture, you realize it doesn’t make sense and there’s a lot of inconsistency/lack of logic.

I’m still enjoying the show more than not, but that’s mostly because of the acting, set design, costumes, music, etc. The writing is the weak spot, and it’s disheartening. But that means the show is prime material for fanfic, so silver linings? Maybe? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’m not a fan of the show’s consistent theme of “women are good, men are violent and want war.” That ain’t feminism, and feminism isn’t supposed to be the moral lesson of the Dance anyway.

I like that Rhaenys is generally level-headed, but I don’t like that the show wants us to pretend like her mass-murdering a bunch of smallfolk at the Dragonpit is no big deal, or that somehow it’s supposed to look bad for the Greens instead of the Blacks. If nobody rioted over Rhaenys’s actions, then nobody should be rioting over the hanging of the rat-catchers. And yet it’s only the hanging of rat-catchers which catches flack. 🧐

Alicent and Criston are unofficially having a fight. TBH I think they’re more interesting like this than when they’re just having sex all the time. I do love that Gwayne seems to realize something is up between them almost instantly; definitely Otto’s son.

Speaking of Gwayne: he’s a smarmy rich kid, and I kind of love him. I would loathe him in real life, but he’s just so fun to watch.

I’m glad that Rhaena finally gets dialogue!!! I love that we see her complicated emotions about being sent away because she’s the only non-dragonrider. The leak about her and Sheepstealer seems more and more likely…but I really am hoping Nettles remains in the show. I would prefer if Rhaena’s arc demonstrates that you don’t have to be a dragonrider to have a good story and be of value to the war effort, and her hatching Morning is a great moment in the book.

I also prefer the theory that Daenerys’s eggs came from Dreamfyre, but it’s not a hill I’m gonna die on.

I LOVED Harrenhal. Spooky vibes, Simon Strong just being like “we don’t want trouble,” Daemon’s hallucination sequence, first glimpse of Alys Rivers. It’s giving me ideas for more Joff adventures. Honestly, I would love if HBO produced some kind of Westerosi horror ghost story anthology.

This is a very minor scene in the episode, but it baffles me so I’ll chat about it a bit. When Rhaenyra is worth her council and they suggest “go somewhere safe while we conduct the war effort,” she calls it treason.

Why is it treason?? They’re literally telling her their ideas to her face. They’re not hiding anything. And it’s basically what happened in the book: Rhaenyra sat out of most of the war while other people conducted it. I feel like this particular scene/dialogue was forced to showcase that Rhaenyra is a woman in a man’s world.

Rhaenys and Corlys’s scene was very sweet. It’s also definitely foreshadowing Rook’s Rest.

I’m not sure I like Helaena’s scene. I read comments that she’s hyper-rationalizing as a coping method, but that doesn’t come across the screen well. I think it’s because Helaena isn’t getting the screentime necessary to convey a lot of this stuff, so we have to resort to BTS commentary to get confirmation that yes, Helaena does actually mourn Jaehaerys, she hasn’t just moved on after a few days.

I enjoyed the vulnerability that Aegon shows during his armor fitting, and his discourse with Larys. I don’t necessarily like Larys, nor do I like him manipulating (?) Aegon, but it’s fun to watch.

I can understand Aegon’s thought process to go out with The Boyz as his own coping mechanism, but like many things this season, it’s thanks to the acting. TGC’s face shows a series of emotions as Aegon realizes what a mess he’s in, then ultimately he decides he might as well go out on the town to get a semblance of normalcy. Without that degree of acting, it would be easy to dismiss Aegon as not caring about anything.

It was fun to follow Ulf’s perspective on the streets of KL. His dialogue was a bit clunky because the writers are trying to set up the dragonseed plot. He and Hugh are going to be an interesting pair to watch, with show!Hugh being the serious guy while Ulf is the clown.

No surprise here, but the brothel scene definitely gave me a lot of emotions. 🥲 I like to think sober!Aegon wouldn’t have been as much of an ass to Aemond, after all the times that Aegon has indicated he’s strongly relying on Aemond and Vhagar. Alas, Aegon was very drunk and said a lot of things he shouldn’t have said. Ewan also had phenomenal face-acting in this scene, where you could see him going from horrified and embarrassed to Stone Cold Badass™️.

HOWEVER. If the E4 leak I’ve heard is true, that Aemond tries to kill Aegon because of this brothel scene, I’m gonna be very pissed. We got a scene in E2 where Aemond says he regrets killing Luke…and now he’s gonna kill his own brother in cold blood? 🧐

Septa Rhaenyra… I’m sorry, but this whole sequence was unintentionally hilarious to me. The whole idea is kinda ridiculous. If you forget for a moment that Luke and Jaehaerys are dead, the scene with Alicent and Rhaenyra gives the vibes of two former besties having a spat over something unserious. Honestly I might use it as inspiration for some Alicent and Rhaenyra interactions in my fics, but the big difference is that nobody’s kids have been murdered (yet?) in my fics.

Overall, E3 was a setup episode for future episodes, so it feels like nothing much happened. I’ll still be here next week for E4, but I’ll probably be grumbling about the writing again. 💀

[technicolorxsn]

need to project this image into literally everyone's head

[carbootsoul]

omg please talk about saionji and utena and i want to know ur thoughts

ack anon i am. kissing u on the mouth rn thank u so much for asking !!! a fair warning before i write anything else: i have a stupid and inexplicable amount of affection for saionji kyouichi and this response will probably be kinda biased toward being understanding of him. don't get me wrong he is still very much a bad person throughout a lot of the series BUT he's also 17. anyway this got long bc i have many thoughts so its under the cut

my big thought about the two of them is that they're foils for each other! both to illustrate utena's good qualities and to point out what went wrong with saionji.

the main place we see similarities between them is their feelings toward both anthy and touga. saionji and utena are the only duelists to duel FOR anthy as a person rather than the power she wields. they're also the only two people that touga ever expresses unguarded affection toward, the only people with him in the church scene, the only people who reject him (other than nanami, whose rejection is more complex imo), and the two targets of his manipulation in season one. wakaba refers to them both as her prince and they both express at least the potential to be friends with her, they're both dragged into some kind of relation with akio through someone they're close with (saionji only for a few short scenes but the camera one does make me a little queasy), they're the only duelists to lose a duel and then rechallenge the winner. they're also the only characters to be "expelled" (not quite textually in utena's case, but the girls at the end of the last episode speculate that she was expelled for "getting in trouble with the chairman"). finally there are some vague thoughts i have about saionji's rose being a very pale green, which is a complimentary color to pink (while his hair is a deeper green, mirroring touga's red hair).

in terms of their personalities being similar it's mostly just the fact that they're both jocks and they both do the baffled face a lot which i think is fun from them both :) same 'interacting with nanami ever' expression. the two BIG things they have in common personality wise is their tendency to insist that their view of the world (especially!! their view of what is good for anthy) is correct, and obliviousness (especially to their privilege and the way it acts on other people, especially anthy). utena grows out of both those things, though, and they're two of her main points of character development throughout the series.

obviously, the differences between them are quite a bit more obvious. saionji is mostly used (especially at the beginning of the series) to contrast utena and to provoke her into protecting anthy. he's abusive, controlling, and cocky where she is... just cocky, and only sometimes. saionji is less aware of 'adult things' than utena (in some ways he's more childish than nanami- the scene that comes to mind is the one with the exchange diary, where utena worries that saionji is making sexual advances and saionji obviously has no idea what she's thinking. tbh i hold that saionji didn't really know what sex was before his car scene which is both funny and v upsetting to me). saionji is unwilling or unable to change the parts of himself that harm other people (or unaware of the effects of his actions) whereas utena, throughout the series, constantly does her best to be a better person and i love her so. so much. not-prince of my heart. also he has green hair and she has pink hair :) also he sucks so bad

anyway now that i've established their similarities and differences, here's the heart of my argument!! at their core, utena and saionji are very similar people (the church flashback rly illustrates this imo but maybe thats just bc children r all similar) but, because saionji grew up with power that utena didn't, he's. uh. who he is. (his eyes are purple, a color associated with akio's control. akio.. uh. patriarchy man.)

saionji's role in the show isn't just as the personification of rape culture, but as a statement on what the patriarchy DOES to teenage boys who don't notice their privilege. he is quite obviously less aware of his power than touga or akio are (they both use sex as a power tool, and both take advantage of the fact that they, as men, have power in most situations. saionji also takes advantage of this but it seems much less conscious on his part- again the scene with the exchange diary comes to mind. he is looming over utena-as-anthy but not in an attempt to scare her, but just bc he's found that when he is big and tall, people do what he want). this is shown especially in what we see of saionji when he's staying with wakaba! he's a much better person when he doesn't have this institutional power as close to his fingertips, even when he's unaware of this lacking. he goes back to being a douche the second he leaves, to, which is where his personal problems come into play.

saying that saionji is how he is just because he was born into privilege is way more forgiving of him than the narrative is or i would be, because the other bit that contrasts him with utena is his unwillingness to see or acknowledge his privilege. the fact that he's unaware of the bits and pieces of society that come together to give him that power over anthy doesn't absolve him, because he still takes advantage of the fact that he can do whatever he wants to her and he never tries to understand why. he sees that if he's engaged to anthy she will love him unconditionally (what he's looking for throughout the series) but he never tries to connect the dots between the power he has over her and the fact that she says she loves him. a scene that i think is rly interesting is the one in touga's last few episodes where touga and utena are talking and saionji comes and lies down in anthy's lap- it's such a small thing but i think it does a really interesting job summarizing his character! he actively seeks out affection/the love he wants from anthy and, because of the power he wields, she gives it to him. he's content with this, because he refuses to see the power dynamics that make her let him nap with his head in her lap. he allows himself to keep the safe blanket of his privilege, even when it hurts everyone else. utena sees that she has power as the rose bride's fiance and she (eventually) works against the powers that be to change that.

anywayyy that was a lot lol and im not sure it makes a ton of sense??? but those r what i've been thinking about! really it boils down to like. saionji would be a much better person if he took a feminist theory class with a completely open mind. and then he and utena could be friends :) the other thing it boils down to is that both utena and saionji's best and worst characteristics are being stupid as fuck BUT utena tries to learn and saionji refuses to. thanks again for sending this ask!! i hope my response made some sense haha

[dmbakura]

I’d love to hear your thoughts on DmC if you feel like sharing asdfghjkl

(I haven't finished the vergil's downfall dlc yet but I don't think it's gonna give me any earth shattering revelations about the plot so anyways) I guess I should list whatever positives I can think of along with the negatives. WHOMST READY FOR AN ESSAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY

Positives:

gameplay and level design is good. some bosses suck. there's one great boss fight (bob barbas) that, if the rest of the game reached that level of creativity it would have been way better. it's an aiight game overall with decently fun mechanics and weapons

the setting is mildly interesting. I do like the dystopian punk mass media surveillance state it had going on and wish more was done with it

idk that's it really

Negatives:

to expand on above, it really just didn't do much with the world it established. in the second half of the game any worldbuilding it had going on becomes second to the family drama they try and shoehorn in to make it more like the actual dmc games. which I really don't understand because they seem to want to establish this as its own thing and yet?

dante and vergil's dynamic is so fucking bad. they have no chemistry. I don't understand why they try and set up this rivalry when neither of them even properly remember it. It just doesn't work, and it especially feels off given they're allies for 90% of the game. None of their interactions come off naturally and their showdown at the end feels forced as hell

vergil's character is baffling. it's like they took one look at his canon counterpart and said "ah yes he's the order man" which is a very shallow reading of canon vergil's character. as such, the reboot version of him comes off as a really gross misinterpretation. and fine it has no connection to the canon material, but the character still shouldn't be completely unrecognizable. and they also give him similar story beats to canon vergil which now make very little sense given the new context. would it not have been more fitting for him to be some kind of rogue hacker out for his own gain instead of a vigilante justice type character with a skewed idea of order? or for him and dante to be at odds? they might have played better off each other that way instead of their stiff interactions as "allies" in the game, where they're forced to get along to face a greater threat, and this also might have made their fight have more weight. also, he doesn't fucking do shit in this game until the very last battle.

really all the characters suck. dante is only barely tolerable at points because he has shades of nero in him. kat is... The Girl. mundus is laughably bad and I don't get the attempt at humanizing him. I feel like he's not hard to write. mundus has such weight in the og games because he doesn't have much characterization. he's this omnipresent god like figure that you mostly SEE the aftermath of and gain the full context of his complete and utter EVIL through people like vergil who were destroyed by him. DmC mundus just tells you he's a 'god' (and also his human alias is """kyle""" what the everloving fuck) like that's supposed to mean anything. I think that's the problem with basically all the characters tbh. they just Tell you what they are instead of Showing it.

it's probably been said before but the tone is so edgy and in a completely terrible way that lacks any charm and doesn't at all try to endear itself. it's mean spirited on a meta level ("not in a million years") and relies on shock value for a lot of its story beats. there's an uncomfortable amount of misogyny/understated homophobia in the game too. every single woman in this game is referred to as a whore at some point. kat's entire character is written to be this sad abused girl with no agency, even throwing in an offhand "oh my dad molested me" out of nowhere. there's a scene where mundus rapes (?) his blonde henchwoman. there's a scene where the evil newscaster calls dante a "known sexual deviant" with a wink wonk kinda face and given the context of the scene it feels like a jab at actual dante (who the devs of this game called a "gay cowboy" derogatorily). this game is CRUSTY.

I hAvE TeRAByTES oF pLAnS We CanT LeT MuNDuS GeT HiS hAnDS On (vergil what the fuck does that MEAN)

[jesuisgourde]

sometimes i’m really surprised that i just continue existing while rawdogging reality and then i realize that well i kind of dont because i just kind of hide my brain in various dumb shit on the internet and youtube and books and tumblr and such. but it’s just mostly because i know my fucking stupid ass personality and i know that if i started on any substance, even casually, i’d get real addicted real real fast and like i’ve pretty much always known that about myself because of how much i love escapism and doing as much as i can to not be alone with my thoughts (or blank blank horrible lack thereof) and to have constant idk like stimulation of some sort. but sometimes it just catches me by surprise and i realize there’s absolutely a reason that i try not to pay close attention to the news or subscribe to any news sites or whatever because just reading an article or two about a couple of news stories is just a one-way ticket to spiralling over the speed and immensity of news and life and never being able to keep up and all of it being so insane and so much and all that and it’s like if i read the news there’s always so many things happening all at once and there’s just no room to know what to actually focus on or pay attention to or give emotional effort towards or whatever and like if i think about it too hard then it’s just overwhelming that there’s all this shit happening everywhere and no one can really do anything about it because all us individuals have no fucking power as individuals plus half the shit that’s on the news is stuff that’s in another state or another country or whatever. so there’s that plus the fact that so often if i am not actively working to read or watch or listen to something my brain is just a big old blank expanse and it’s terrifying because so often no matter what i do i can’t conjure up a thought that’s worth lingering on and more often than not the only thing sitting in the middle of the expanse is just two or four lines of a song that have decided to lodge themselves there and allow nothing else in. like how the hell am i managing to rawdog my whole entire blank brain. my coworker and i were having a conversation and the subject of drinking briefly came up and he asked me if i drink beer and i was like no i don’t drink because i know if i liked it even a little i’d end up doing nothing but. and it’s fucking true and idk sometimes i vaguely consider like trying shit just to get something different (although tbh probably the only thing i’d really actually consider would be psychedelics) but then i realize i really really really should not because of how much i love escapism and crave easy stimulation. anyway this is just an insane ramble because the news is overwhelming and my brain is fucking stupid and i’m utterly baffled at how i have managed to deal with it with nothing although i know that at least part of the reason is because of how torturously blank it so often is. even though that’s a massive part of my problem and tbh i think i’d rather be overwhelmingly full of thoughts than so blank all the time because then i’d at least have some sort of stimulation something going on you know some sort of something to run with or go on and something to think about or things and something to write about or whatever, because the blankness extends to everything not just the news but fucking everything and it is just so frustrating after a while and i don;t really know what to do about it except just continue to sit there with nothing in my head and craving something something somethihng fucking anything at all literally any independent thought or creative idea or something because the nothing is so awful and boring and static and quite literally stupefying.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

I am actually fuming at the new promo photo for Ange for next week. I can't even be bothered to explain how stupid the concept that Ange would want to be with Josh after going through a major trauma rather than her daughter. They just put their characters through drama for the bants and then refuse to acknowledge the impact it would have.

Why are they cramming everything in at once?! The Ange storyline and Henrik storyline should not be running at the same time. Ange being literally held hostage, and then 'getting' with Josh, should not be happening in one episode. I'm just so confused, the lack of understanding and apparent care/empathy by the writers about these serious subjects is baffling.

The what now - *goes and checks the Eastieoaks website* - oh.

I really hope this somehow isn’t what it looks like. If they are going there... seriously? I don’t mind the idea of a Josh/Ange relationship, tbh, it could be a bit of fun, but like... have it later in the year. Not now, when she’s just been through something really traumatic. Put the focus on that first, gdi Holby. (Also now I’m worried we’re getting another “woman’s trauma becomes all about a man/her relationship with a man” saga.)

Also, what Ange has been through would be incredibly traumatic for anyone, but... surely it would also bring up memories of her rape? Being grabbed and attacked like that, being deprived of her autonomy? I’m not sure I buy that she’d be wanting to go and have sex with anyone so soon after that. Like, I guess maybe if she’s using sleeping with Josh as a distraction/coping mechanism to take her mind off all of it or something like that, that might make a bit more sense, but I’m not sure the Holby writers are smart enough to write it that way.

The Ange SL and the Henrik SL should really not be running simultaneously. I am 100% with you on that one. They really, really should have waited until after all the stuff that happened with Cameron had been over for at least a couple of months before they started the Henrik SL. (Which also shouldn’t have been anything like what it actually is. I have no objections to the basic concept, tbh I’ve thought for a few years now that it was only a matter of time before some producer noticed that Henrik has a lot of traits mostly common in sexual abuse survivors and made a storyline out of it. But it should’ve been treated properly and as the serious subject it is, not just as an excuse for more drama, and all this racist stereotyping and retconning with the abuser being Sahira’s dad should never have been a thing.)

The writers evidently don’t care about handling topics of trauma or abuse properly at all, tbh. You can tell. Most of the time when a character goes through something traumatic on Holby, it’s quickly glossed over because dealing with the harm it would actually do is too ~inconvenient~. Unfortunately, I expect them to do this exact same thing with Ange being kidnapped that they have done with numerous other characters’ traumatic experiences. :/

[cruisercrusher]

i totally wanna hear what you have to say abt rebels!! personally im a big fan and ive never seen anyone specifically not like the show so im interested in ur thoughts !!

Ok please keep in mind I do not at all pretend to be unbiased because clone wars is my most favourite thing ever so every Star Wars thing ever gets compared to clone wars it’s like my thing

The core of why I’m not fond of rebels is because to me none of it felt impactful. I’ve actually watched I think 3 out of the 4 seasons, because my d*d made us all watch it as a “family” and imma be real with you chief. Years down the line I struggled to remember the main characters names. Almost none of it actually stuck with me in any meaningful way, someone will mention something that happened in an episode I did watch and I’ll be like damn i have no recollection???? But also like having gone back and taken a second and third look at the show I’ve gotten the impression that even within the show nothing has that much impact, maybe the last season is different idk but it feels very one note to me and at times shallow in the story telling. Nothing sticks, because the characters retain a degree of staticity throughout what I’ve seen, and Disney very clearly had a set formula laid out for how the episodes/arcs would go that left little room for the ballsy storytelling and character development we got from clone wars.

It’s a little disappointing because I think there were things in rebels that had a lot of potential, rebels as a whole had a lot of potential but Disney really put a stranglehold on Dave Filoni and the rest of the creative teams creative ability.

That being said, I really don’t like the animation either. Like, really don’t like it. I feel like it lacks depth and texture, and I don’t like a lot of the character designs, and the backgrounds are a little flat, and the way the characters move is weird to me. They’re just a tad too fluid and a touch too expressive that for me it reads as very uncanny valley, it actually took me out of it sometimes.

(Also the human skin tones all looked kinda off to me I was like I don’t think that’s the right undertone babes that’s too much yellow. Too much yellow babe)

As well as the fact that the animation stayed pretty much exactly the same throughout the series, and had none of the actual real innovation and groundbreaking animation that the clone wars had.

Going back to the story telling, and again, this is Disney’s fault, there were a lot of missed opportunities for them to go really hard. There were a lot of lessons in clone wars (like always question authority, and Capitalism Bad, and War is Futile, and sometimes the people who are supposed to be the good guys aren’t necessarily very good) that Disney is just straight up afraid of. Like clone wars really had a lot of more left leaning themes that is simply too much for the conservative, one percenter, trump supporting Disney executives and shareholders.

An example of this I feel would be when they introduced the clones. If I could have I would have done that arc very differently. And don’t get me wrong, I loved seeing grandpa Rex! But the way those episodes were executed felt a little. Dissatisfying? Maybe not quite disrespectful, but then again imo the story of the clones is THE MOST tragic one in all of Star Wars and those episodes had an element of levity to them that I don’t think fit. That arc could have been really deep and somber (and they could have done at least a little to acknowledge the rampant ptsd the clones must have, especially Wolffe who shot down his general and father figure against his will) yet the script didn’t really do those characters justice at all.

Also, I would have written Sabine’s character very differently. For one, I would have made her at least twenty, because with everything I know about it her it’s baffling that she’s supposedly only like sixteen. Makes zero sense. I don’t get it. Also I would make her a butch lesbian. Like a total mean dyke. We need more of those and I think Sabine could have mean dyke potential.

Now. The inquisitors. Dear lord. Again, could have been really cool, but tHOSE SPINNY LIGHTSABERS DRIVE ME INSANE HOW DO YOU FLY WITH THOSE IT SHDHJSJFJD FORGET THATS NOT HOW THE FORCE WORKS, THATS NOT HOW PHYSICS WORKS!!!!

Barbie life in the dream house had better animation because they were actually supposed to look plastic. Also, rebels yoda haunts my nightmares.

And I specifically don’t like Ahsoka’s character design either. I like her outfit but she looks less like Ahsoka to me and more like Ahsoka’s cousin. Her skull is a different shape. Why is it a different shape? Did she have jaw transplant surgery? Where is the consistency. We literally see an older version of Ahsoka during the mortis arc and she actually looks like herself (and looks really cool!) but Rebels Ahsoka looks nothing like that? I don’t understand. It makes my brain hurt to think about it

Alright, I’ve said a lot of negative things, so here’s a positive: I really appreciate Chopper. I just love chaotic astromech droids who feel nothing but unbridled bloodlust at all times. It is so funny. I appreciate him

And, bearing in mind I haven’t seen the whole episode (because I don’t want to) mostly just gift sets and clips, but the episode where Maul finally finds Obi-Wan on tatooine and they have their final duel?? Very cool concept, lots of potential, I just wish the lightsabers weren’t so SKINNY WHY ARE THEY SO SKINNYYYYYYY

I think that’s about everything? Barring the fact that for the longest damn time I thought none of the characters had fingernails because I mistook Ezra’s layered gloves for fingerless gloves and thought he didn’t have fingernails and that freaked me out? Yeah I think that’s about all my thoughts. I tried to have as little blantantly comparing to clone wars as I could because that’s not exactly fair, of course rebels was never going to be on the same level as clone wars. When it comes to well done cartoons I think it’s like. Way up at the top tier is Atla then clone wars in second place, and then literally everything else is wayyyy below it because that’s just how it is tbh. Anyways hope this satiated your curiosity!

[atopearth]

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Part 3 - Justice for All (2nd game)

The Lost Turnabout Well, that random amnesia to set the game up again for the reader to get used to things again was...random lol. Gotta love the fake dying message that had such beautiful legible writing lol. And I guess these are one of the moments when we should thank parents for using weird and unique spellings of a name, really helps to prove that you’re not a murderer! Kinda baffled with the whole thing though, the defendant and the criminal were both so bland, and the whole case was pretty simple. But, yeah, it’s the first case to get things flowing again so I guess that’s normal! Nice to see Maya back though!~

Reunion, and Turnabout Pearl is an interesting girl…lol. I’m not sure why Mia didn’t want to reveal her aunt as an accomplice for this story, since if she doesn’t reveal it, Maya could be found guilty, especially if Phoenix isn’t able to find evidence for that. Initially, I wasn’t really sure what to think about the whole case being in the village where Maya is from and where she does her training etc, but I guess it’s nice to see her background etc. As for the case itself, although I still suck at knowing when to press statements, I’m a bit better at knowing what to present as evidence hahaha. Anyway, it was obvious that the murderer was the real Mimi who had taken her sister’s face to try and live a new life. So it was easy to know the motives etc, and how she hid in the box behind the screen etc, I guess I was mostly in a bit of a bind in terms of how the murder happened and the reason for the gunshots haha. Otherwise, that was a pretty average case, mostly because I think the witnesses and murderer this time around wasn’t very interesting. Lmao at the daughter von Karma whipping everyone she hates and then whipping Phoenix until he was unconscious when she lost lmao. Hopefully the next case is more interesting~ and I wonder what happened to Edgeworth?

Turnabout Big Top Max…is an interesting character. He looks cool, but dang does he look silly when he reverts to being a country bumpkin lolll. And…I establish that no one in this circus seems normal. Not sure about that daughter of the victim, she looks like she barely cared that her father just got murdered… Great to know that she’s sheltered and so knows nothing about outside of this circus, but dang lmao, she seems to like the puppet more than Max hahahaha. And did Franziska upgrade her whip? It looks different lol. So…Acro has a brother called Bat (loll) who is in a coma after getting bitten on the head by the lion…and this lion got shot by the Ringmaster after it happened… Hmmmm. Oh…Acro is in a wheelchair because he tried to save his brother from the lion… And Bat did what he did because he made a dare with Regina, that if he could do the same thing as her (put his head in the lion’s mouth), she would go on a date with him… How saddening yet ridiculous.

Lmao when Acro comes to court as a witness, and when Phoenix claims that he’s actually the culprit, one of the birds that flies around Acro pecks Phoenix on the head as a background thing lolll. Anyway, once we did more investigations, it was obvious that Acro was the murderer and that his aim was Regina. However, I just feel that the villains this time around in this game have rather dubious motives. I guess it was kinda cool how the “murderer who flew away” came about with the stone bust being pulled up when the coat etc accidentally caught on to it, I just think everything that occurred was still rather anticlimactic though and lacked impact this time around so I couldn’t really like it tbh.. It didn’t help that I didn’t like any of the witnesses lolll. It was understandable how things happened, but at the same time, it wasn’t a very interesting case tbh.

Farewell, my Turnabout Lmao at the Steel Samurai becoming the Nickel Samurai, this show is never gonna end, is it? Omggg Lotta again? Gotta admit, she’s not my favourite witness so seeing her twice in one game kinda kills me lol. On the other hand, I like Wendy Oldbag but she can get rather overbearing lol, so this pairing kills me. When they talked about how the manager Adrian Andrews might be the killer since the ninja actor supposedly hid her mentor’s suicide note, and since she attempted suicide because of how reliant and dependent she was on her mentor when it came to living, I guess it is possible. But I think what hit me the most was when they talked about her “dependent nature”, where she basically always needed someone important enough to her so that she would have a reason to continue living. To an extent, I can kinda relate to that, tbh, although I’m not as extreme as her, sometimes I do feel that if I lost my siblings, I don’t think I’d ever be able to pick myself up.

Anyway, since Edgeworth is back, it was expected that something would happen to Franziska to prevent her from being the prosecutor. It took a while but I’m glad to see Edgeworth and Phoenix in court together. Omggg, Engarde just turned ugly when he revealed his true self!! He was such a pretty boy too, sigh! It’s really interesting to think about the idea that Phoenix’s client is actually guilty for once. He got an assassin to kill Corrida, and Andrews got wrapped up in this when she decided to “frame” Engarde for it. But I think Celeste (Andrews mentor who committed suicide) was the most innocent victim of all this. She first “dated” Engarde back then but was thrown away, and when she thought she could have a happy marriage with Corrida, Engarde decides to tell the guy that they used to be together, so then Corrida called off the marriage, and that led her to commit suicide. But I think the most saddening thing was that even though she committed suicide, none of these guys she so loved were unhappy, instead they were still consumed in their stupid rivalry, where Corrida wanted to use the suicide note she left to show the world Engarde’s true self. It’s so saddening to think of her life just amounting to them as something like that.

It’s interesting that the last case aims at delaying the trial to save Maya since they already know Engarde is guilty, but at the same time, it’s kinda boring? It doesn’t have the same feel as the other cases where you can reveal more and more pieces of the puzzle on what actually happened, and instead focuses on how they can use everything they can to delay the verdict. Which is…quite questionable tbh. Lmaoo at Shelly De Killer (the assassin) being a witness hahahah, and it was so funny when Phoenix presses on one of his statements and asks what’s his fee, and the judge thinks Phoenix wants to kill him lmaooo. Gotta love it when Shelly gets flustered and the transceiver starts leaking oil or whatever lolll. Anyway, I knew that they’d use the fact that Engarde recorded the murder to blackmail Shelly in order to get the latter to turn against his client since he’s so hung up on the trust factor between clients. I mean, you’ve gotta admire Shelley’s work ethic! Lol.

Anyway, I didn’t like the last case in terms of story and how it played out. I think I much prefer the usual Phoenix uncovering the truth bit by bit without really knowing who the culprit is and how they did it until later, against this Engarde case that was just..such compiled with a crappy villain with crappy motives, he was basically a bad villain with no depth. I liked it that they established that both the prosecution and defence work for the truth. But at the same time, I have to say, I don’t feel like the last case really portrayed what it means to be the defence and the prosecution. I had more expectations on how it would be better handled in terms of having a “guilty” defendant as well, but yeah… Oh well. At least everyone is happy and Franziska might be a bit more like the current Edgeworth and not be so hung up on winning all the time.

Overall, I’d say Justice for All was a pretty lacklustre sequel. It rides on a lot of old characters from the previous game, which can be pretty cool, but I think just like how Powers introduces himself as an underpaid action star (LOL), this sequel was underwhelming to say the least. But I guess the biggest problem were just the stories themselves, they just weren’t very interesting, and the way things happened either felt rather cliche or just kinda over the top in a bit of a ridiculous way, whereas in the previous game, it felt like the cases and how they went about it made more sense and was done better. Also, I think Franziska wasn’t a very “fun” prosecutor either, like, I just don’t think she meshed well with Phoenix. Like, when it came to Edgeworth and von Karma, they both were unique enough that they bring a different sort of bantering and connection with Phoenix in court, whereas Franziska is basically just a whipping monster lol. Anyway, hopefully the next game will be better!

[fullmetal-the-last-alchemist]

oooh nice ok do: 1,2,3,4,5,7,9,22,23,

AHAHA NICE NICE NICE

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?tbh i really don’t understand zoro/law? zolaw? i rlly don’t get it.  where’s the appeal?? the chemistry??? do ppl just want two buff dudes with swords to fuck???? i mostly only see horny stuff with them so im assuming thats it. but even knowing that, it still sort of confuses me tbh

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?z*san for SURE like its just. its wack im sorry. y’all who ship it are wack. also la/wlu and jo/takak

3. Have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion?oh definitely, but like. less “opinion” and more bc they ship mc/reyes or baku/deku or st. bad shit.  also unfollowed a few unironic sanji stans bc like come on. one in particular had the wackest viewpoints and opinions on some things… i won’t get into it or name them but it rlly weirded me out. the utter lack of brain cells and comprehensive thinking was baffling

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?really just. see question 2.  z*san, law/lu, jot*kak.  also any incest or pedo ships obviously.  OH relevant one: i really don’t ship fugio honestly?  it’s a valid ship for sure and lots of ppl make really cute and nice content for it but personally i don’t ship it, for reasons

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?i thought i might enjoy jota/kak or z*san for about five seconds and then never thought that ever again. also partially bc neither ship has virtually any canon basis but ANYways

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?HA i can’t believe i used to like f***y t**l thats so goddamn cursed it makes me wanna die. i rlly just wanted one piece and got bad knockoff lowkey porn instead huh

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?i think rohan sucks and i think people who unironically stan him are annoying tbh

22. Popular character you hate?hmm i think i already answered this BUT. i do really hate sanji in a lot of ways.  in some ways he’s one of my favorite one piece characters but at the same time he sucks SO bad. it’s all oda’s fault though. and again, anyone who enjoys him without admitting his character is flawed? is a loser and i have no respect for them

23. Unpopular character you love?this USED to be true for giorno and now it’s not which makes me rlly happy, i love him a lot and i’m glad to see other jjba fans seeing how cool he is too

[alicedrawslesmis]

Davies Thoughts

it came out very long again

okay sorry I keep beating a dead horse here but for someone who claims they are not making the musical andrew davies feels like the les mis fandom was like right after watching the 2012 movie

Remember the 'Cosette stole Marius from Eponine" discourse? but once you read the book and you spend some time away from On My Own we realised Cosette hate is stupid, Eponine is not Marius' girlfriend, on my own is about shattering hope much like I dreamed a dream, Marius is just a mindless guy who doesn't notice his next door neighbours are living in extreme poverty nor does he think about Eponine in any way shape or form besides the information she can give him (and! if you think this is a shitty dynamic I agree! you can fix that in your writing but this is what the book says! so if you're gonna be accurate to the book you have to make Marius an idiot! or don't be accurate to the book and make him a better guy!)

bottom line is I really think Davies read the brick in such a superficial way, it feels like he speed-read his way through it and chose the """"sexy"""" parts, mixed them in with the musical and that's what we got

also I don't think he fully read the the digressions either tbh, the story is the heart but the digressions are the bones of the whole book, you can't separate them

About the lack of sex in the brick: I think it is super chaste, much more than your average Hugo work. But this book is Not About Sexual Intrigue! This book is chaste because it's a book about Revolution with a Capital Fucking R. It's about the Ideal, Beauty and Good and Justice, and Hugo made a swear to god choice to make the book more chaste than usual. His characters are mostly virgins and Explicitly Stated To Be Virgins In The Text. So Andrew, if you want to be true to "the psychology of the book" you Have To Talk About Revolution. You have to show that the endgame is to change the world for the better by revolting and not about sexual intrigue during a riot. It's not a riot. It's an uprising. VICTOR HUGO MAKES NO PLACE FOR SEX TO BE ON THE FOREGROUND WHEN THE STORY IS ABOUT THE IDEAL. THE PROOF IS IN EVERYTHING HE SAYS ABOUT ENJOLRAS.

Point is I think Davies has that image of the musical in his head from when he watched it in 1989 and never again, and he doesn't like it because it's a musical so -low artform-, and he read the book but was unable to separate the image he had of the musical from the book he was reading, so much that he missed the core of the story

and it baffles me truly because V Hugs is not subtle? Hugo states several times (I'd say too much even) what the point of this book is. And it's very much not about how everyone is a sexually repressed incel.

True to the book is Revolution, what Davies is doing is take some scenes from the book and remove it from it's political content. The musical is also kinda guilty of that, but at least Cosette gets a solo so I guess you win some, you lose some

I hate Davies' take on the story, I hate the BBC for whitewashing a book about social change into a feel-good period soap-opera that's "not a musical" meant to reassure people of how good we got now, and how shitty the past was. And I hate the way Les Mis has cemented itself in pop culture as a melodrama with Anne Hathaway.

So that's my stance I guess

[purplesurveys]

382

-What was the last song that you sang out loud? I played a Destiny’s Child playlist when we were out for a bit earlier so I was most likely rapping along to Bug A Boo before we got home. -If someone has bad breath, do you tell him or her? I don’t think I can. I’d rather just not have my face directly on them when talking. -With which friend are you most likely to share a secret? Angela. She knows e v e r y t h i n g. -Do you have an item that comforts you when you are sad/scared? My...phone? Haha. If I get anxious I need to watch videos to distract me. My phone has YouTube. Also bracelets that Gabie has given me over the years. -When are you likely to hide your emotions? When I’m with people that don’t really know about my anxiety. People I’m not close to, in general.

-Which is scarier: Dying of thirst or of starvation? I think both are equally terrifying??? Both put the body in immense pain and it goes through a slow, agonizing shutdown and I don’t even want to think about experiencing other lol. -Who was the last person to take your breath away? MY GIRLFRIEND -When you turn on the TV, what channel do you flip to? Probably a movie channel but I legit have not watched television in yearssss. I watch everything on Netflix now. -Have you ever tried to help someone quit smoking? No. -What was the last comment someone made on your music taste? I don’t have much of a music taste so it’s not really something people tend to make comments on. -Where do you go/what do you do when you need to calm down? My room. Or to my best friends. -What was the last mess you cleaned up? I had a stack of readings and stationery scattered all over the dining table last night when I was studying, so I cleaned everything up before going to bed. -Have you ever had to talk anyone out of suicide? Yes I had to talk to Toby because he made a series of disturbing tweets a couple of weeks ago. We aren’t close per se, but he’s an orgmate and therefore a friend, so I messaged him immediately. I’m happy it worked, cos he showed up to school the next day and gave me a bear hug. -When you think of tomorrow, what feelings come to mind? Work. -Who, in your opinion, has an amazing voice? Hannah sings a lot, and I really like it when she does because she sounds great. -Would you ever camp out on a beach, under the stars? Of course.

-What is the last thing you complained about? I need a printer to print out my readings (I absolutely cannot study from an e-book) but ours has been broken for years and there’s no Internet/printing shop nearby. UGH I’m serious about complaining over not being able to study haha.   -What was the last curse-word you said? Fuck. -When you fake sick to get out of school, what do you say or do to convince your parents that you are sick? I would never fake sick to my Asian mom.  -How did you recover from your last bout of tears? I slept. As is always the most effective way to stop crying. -Do you still talk to your very first best friend? Yes. I talked to her last night. -When was the last time something went terribly wrong? Well a couple of weeks ago Gab and I had a huge, really serious fight that had just been unfixable–it was the kind of fight that you just had to wait. And the wait was torture. I was really scared then and I stayed in bed for what was probably 48 hours and ate like two times in that period. -How do you console someone when he or she is upset? I stay with them and listen to them if they have to let things out. -Have you ever seen either one of your parents cry? Just my mom. I don’t know what I’d do if I saw my dad cry. -Choose one: Trip to outerspace, or trip underneath the oceans? OUTER SPACE. I’d do anything to have a glimpse into my astronaut dream. -How often do you feel overwhelmed? 7 days a week. -How do you deal with everyday life? Get by. Aren’t we all forced to? -Do you have any secret obsessions or guilty pleasures? I don’t think so. I’m never guilty of whatever it is I’m obsessing at the moment haha. I am into serial killers, like reading and watching docus about them; and obviously I never announce it the world unless it comes up in conversation. -Aside from on this survey, what was the last thing you wrote about? I was writing down notes on my readings from my Southeast Asian history class. -Who in your family do you act like the most? I’m a mix of my mom and dad. I seriously can’t tell you who I act more like. There are certain phrases my mom says that I say, and certain intonations and mannerisms I got from my dad.  -What is the most romantically sweet thing someone has done for you? I’m into intimate, more between-the-two-of-you kind of stuff, so I always appreciate it when Gab volunteers to drive my car if I ever drink a little bit too much for the night. She helps me get to bed and gets me some clothes to wear too, which is always sweet.

-When you go out to the mall, do people stare? Not me, but my girlfriend and I obviously will get stares from time to time for holding hands. -Have you ever been confronted by a mall cop for your behavior? No. -What just tears at your heartstrings? Videos of dogs reuniting with their owners, abused dogs getting saved and all groomed up, or dogs getting adopted. -Is there a show you swear that you will never watch? GAME OF THRONES -What was the last topic that you ranted about? The lack of a printer that I delved on several survey questions ago. -Is there someone that makes you feel like you're walking on eggshells? Jane lol. She’s the president of our org and will easily get pissed the fuck off sometimes, and it never does my anxiety any good. -Were you ever afraid of one of your past teachers? Yes. We had this monster of a PE teacher in 2nd grade who would literally kick down doors if she gets angry and would yell at 8 year olds. How she ever got employed in the first place still baffles me. -Have you ever been in a physical fight on school grounds? That’s a huuuuuge no-no in our school, so no. Plus I came from an all-girls’ Catholic school; it just wasn’t in anyone’s nature to pick a fight. -Have you written anything in a bathroom stall? What, if anything? No, I feel so iffy about vandalizing in public. -Is your school like the drama capital of the country? HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You can say that, damn. -A homeless man asks you for 50 cents; how do you respond? I give them a little more and a snack if I had any. -When was the last time you visited a thrift store? I don’t remember. I don’t think I have? -Was there ever a time when you wished you'd never been born? Always. I didn’t even choose to be born lol. -Can you handle constructive criticism? Uhhhhhh only if it’s from someone I truly respect. Otherwise I can honestly be a big baby about criticism. -Who is the most sensitive person that you know? ME. Also one of my friends, Mils. -Have you ever had a tooth (or teeth) pulled? Nope. -You can have one famous person's wardrobe; who do you choose, and why? Kate’s!!! She dresses so well and looks pretty in all of her outfits. -When was the last time you wrote someone a note? I think December? Aya was down in the dumps pretty bad so I dropped her a short message on Facebook to let her know that I’m always around for her. -Do you tell your parents before you go somewhere, or just leave? I ask permission. Duh. I’m Asian.  -What was the last thing you tried to get out of doing? Agatha’s birthday party. She’s a good friend, but I’m not friends with any of her friends and I just can’t relate with the college block we both belong to. I scheduled a date with Gabie’s dad on the same night because I didn’t want to go to the party. -On average, how many surveys do you fill out in one day? If I had a lot of time, I could fill out three. Nowadays it’s like once a day/a couple of times a week. -How many hours a day do you spend on Bzoink? I don’t stay on Bzoink; I just go on there to look for surveys. -Which season do you dread the most? I hate Philippine summers. -Do you ever brag about your achievements? Oh god never. I hate putting any attention on me. -If someone makes fun of you, are you able to laugh it off? Tbh no, I’m pretty sensitive and serious in that aspect. I mean I’d smile to be polite but will most likely be whispering something evil about them in my head hahahaha. -When was the last time that you watched the sun come up? Three years ago, in Sagada. -What did you do last Halloween? I think I went out with Gab that day, but it wasn’t to celebrate Halloween. -Last Thanksgiving? -Last Christmas - if you celebrate? I like how Christmas has the *if you celebrate* disclaimer but the North American-centric Thanksgiving doesn’t. Anyway, we had several family dinners and we ate and drank and caught up with one another. -How did you celebrate the arrival of the new year? Also saw some relatives and ate and drank and bonded with my cousins. -Is there a foreign culture you'd like to learn more about? I’d like to know more about all of them if I had the time and the chance. -Have you ever (purposely or accidentally) played with someone's heart? I possibly might’ve with Mike but I don’t want to be an ass and assume. -Has anyone ever played with yours? Sure, you can say that. -Have you ever seen a famous painting and thought "I could have done that?” Not famous, but expensive ones. The ones that are paint splatters hah. -Fire drills: Did you ever wish they were real ... just once? LOL YES. I’m terrible for thinking that but yes. Mostly because everyone was such kids about it and never took the drills seriously. I secretly wanted a real one to happen just to see those people regret not being any more serious.

-What is the scariest thing about attending your school? Nothing’s scary about UP. If you’re scared to be in UP you can’t survive in it. -Are you a good judge of other people's intentions? Meh. I can tell sometimes. What was the last thing that you felt strongly about? I’m not so sure, it’s been a while. -Shopping: best with friends, parents, bf/gf, or alone? Girlfriend. -What is one insecurity you have about your body? Teeth. -What is one part of your body that you are proud of? My overall figure. -When was the last time someone told you to turn your music down? Ages ago. I’m getting old myself and don’t want my music too loud lmfao. -When you don't know how to spell a word, do you look it up? Yes, of course. -Are you one to spend a lot of time in the bathroom? Nope. I hate making people wait. -Have you seen the movie Super Size Me? No. -Do you still eat at McDonald's, regardless of that film? I’d probably continue eating at any fast food establishment even if I watch a billion documentaries exposing them, being completely honest. -Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a different race? Sometimes. -Do you ever consider the challenges other races go through? Of course. Except for one snowflake race out there, lol. -When was the last time you doubted your abilities? Now? -At your favorite restaurant, what do you order? I don’t pick favorite restaurants. -What was the last thing you wished for? A DAMN PRINTER. -How many times a day, on average, do you look at the time? Too many. I’m perpetually impatient.

[kurosarium]

Haikyuu headcanons for the reactions of Captain Squad+ Kageyama and Iwaizumi (that makes it Seven character I think) to their s/os showing up unexpectedly on Halloween in top notch sexy costumes (slave Leia costume level sexy). How would the party play out?

I had to google the Leia costume.......”what the fuck” is all I’m gonna say. 🤭

Thanks for the request anyway!!!

Sawamura

He’d feel extremely uncomfortable with them showing up dressed in such a way. He’s definitely not the kind of person to tell their s/o what to wear, but he would comment on it, saying something like “why would you be wearing this to a Halloween party?” or “That’s a really nice costume, but a little inappropriate, don’t you think?”.

Of course he thinks they look extraordinarily hot dressed up like this, and it would surely give him a hard looking away, but nonetheless he wouldn’t approve of it. He just thinks that it’s not very appropriate to walk around like that in public.

Daichi would probably urge his s/o to leave with him a little sooner than planned. Once they’re alone he’ll sternly tell them that he’s kinda shocked and that he wouldn’t have thought  his s/o would walk around in such a getup in front of that many people.

Even though he might be rather bewildered at first, he wouldn’t resist any of his s/o’s advances (given they’re in private).

Kageyama

As soon as he spots his s/o he will turn crimson, and wouldn’t be able to from a proper sentence around them. He awkwardly averts his gaze, and tries to fix his eyes on anything but them. He’ll compliment them on their looks anyway, but he’d be too nervous, and his compliments might sound odd or wrong the way he puts it.

Kageyama would probably ask them why they decided on such a revealing costume at some point though. The party would continue unaffected by his s/o appearance, and only when the other first years or even worse, Oikawa and his former team mates show up, Kageyama would get extremely protective. He’ll try to shield his s/o from their view and tells Hinata that he shouldn’t dare to set his gaze on them or he’ll decapitate him personally.

I imagine that he secretly thinks that their outfit is a little too bold, considering their age, but he wouldn’t mention it.

Oikawa

Is pretty baffled at first, but regains his composure very quickly. From then on he will be walking around with an arm slung around his s/o and shows them off to everyone at the party.

He’ll definitely enjoy the embarrassed and ruby faces of his younger team mates (Kunimi and Kindaichi mostly), and points out how they can’t stand being around a beautiful woman such as his s/o. He’s the type to be like “Yeah watch as much as you want, she’s mine anyway.”.

BUT if he encounters one of his rivals at the party he will become overly possessive, and will most likely tell his s/o to stay by his side at all costs. He wouldn’t want his s/o to run into one of them on accident. He’d be super anxious throughout the event, but tries to downplay it when someone mentions that he’s being very clingy.

Bonus (?): If there’s a dance floor he’ll definitely want to dance with his s/o, and will grind on them with no shame whatsoever.

Iwaizumi 

His first reaction would be like “Uhm, what exactly do you think you’re doing?”.  He’s not very fond of the way his s/o presents them self on the party, and his thoughts are occupied with criticism towards their choice of costume rather that inappropriate thoughts about them. He won’t openly say anything about it, but he’s definitely ready to kill anybody who makes any kind of comment about his s/o that he deems inappropriate.

He might try to avoid the other third years from aoba johsai, because he knows that they will shamelessly tease him about the situation. Other than that he would act slightly more awkward around his s/o, party because he feels a tiny bit uncomfortable with them being dressed like that in public, but also because he’s flustered as fuck.

Kuroo

He would be flabbergasted. Like he’d be just casually chatting with his squad, but once he spots his s/o dressed up like that his jaw would be hanging open. Kuroo would excuse himself momentarily to approach his s/o, and after he complimented them more than enough he will return to his people with his them trailing behind.

He’d make a lot of suggestive jokes/ innuendos, and they’re either so stupid that they’ve got you laughing on the ground or they’re pretty smart and effective, and will make your panties drop in 0.00218 seconds.

Kuroo won’t make any physical advances (except hugging/kissing etc.) towards his s/o while they’re in public, and patiently waits until they’re alone to make his move.

Bokuto

He really wouldn’t know what to say, and instead keeps his eyes on his s/o for the whole evening, and he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands by himself as well. Like, Bokuto would constantly keep an arm around them, and his hand might even slip a little more downwards, accidentally touch their bottom, and he honestly would just keep it there tbh.

If he notices anyone gaping at his s/o he will try to create eye contact with that person, and will give them the nastiest glare he can muster. He actually likes showing them off, but considering that he’s quite possessive, especially with them wearing such a gamey outfit, he will try to keep his s/o by his side, and just stares them up and down all evening. And touches them, just a little bit, but he really can’t keep his hands to himself.

Moniwa

This guy’s going to be extremely flustered, and will most likely try to avoid his former team mates as much as possible. He knows that they would probably do or say something that would embarrass him, so he rather not encounter them at all.

Besides this, he’s a little uncomfortable with his s/o appearing in such an alluring costume and nervously tell them that he’d rather have them dress up more conventionally the next time, or to at least warn him.

Terushima

His surprised at first, but that surprised look on his face turn into a playful grin real quick. He’ll approach his s/o with a small skip in his walk and will immediately sling his arms around their waist, leaning into them, and whispers how amazing they look. Then he’ll take his s/o to meet his friends (if they haven’t met before he’ll introduce his s/o) and they’ll just casually hang out and chit chat about god and the world.

At some point he’ll most likely drag his s/o onto the dance floor (it’s likely that he’ll request for everyone to join him on the dance floor). It’s mostly just silly drunken dance moves, but if he’s really feeling the outfit he might grind on them as well.

Ushijima

Externally he looks as stern and unfazed as always, but as soon as they reach him he’ll straight forward asks them what made them choose a provoking costume such as this. He doesn’t ask because he judges them, but rather out of curiosity as he had notices that most people at the party dressed pretty casual unlike his s/o.

He doesn’t feel uncomfortable, and just really doesn’t care about the lack of fabric on his s/o. He knows that it’s not his decision to make and will accept whatever intention they had for wearing such a costume, even if he doesn’t agree completely.

He’s really chill and will do whatever he would have done without them suddenly appearing as well. For the most part he will talk with some of his friends, and awkwardly stands on the sidelines of the dance floor with a drink in his hand. And even if his s/o asks him to join them for a dance he will pass and tell them that he really can’t dance, and would rather just engage in another conversation with them.

It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate the straightforwardness of his s/o, but he probably wouldn’t give in if they made a move on him at the party. He maybe wouldn’t even get the hint.

[whyshanti]

twenty nineteen. periodt.

i genuinely felt the need to write this because i was bored i have not written anything in a really long time. but mostly because there’s only a few who might read this and not care afterwards. it sucks to not be able to do something that i used to enjoy for quite a while. but here i am!

a lot of thoughts to unburden and a lot of unspoken feelings to unpack. let’s get to it, bih.

1. this year felt like it was dragging on. i wanted it to end asap.

so this year, i actually had A LOT of time. where did it go? 

to: movies, series, anime, music, watching youtube videos, breakdowns, feeling stuck & paralyzed,  academics, reading articles about pop culture & mainstream shit, going out with friends, chatting random ppl at night bc i thought i could trust them (and some of them, i can), and etc.

but on a more serious note, i really was more into the world of media, of both mainstream and indie worlds. i still can’t believe i got through this semester when i have been doing these things unrelated to uni. some ppl are also baffled by this activity log that i have. 

point is: i felt like a walking zombie. probably looked like one as well. there is this routine that i have to do and i got really sick of myself. i didn’t have the motivation to strive more. i was always either sleeping (at least for the first half of the year) or watching. it all feels lifeless. the latter part of the year, my body clock was wrecked. i did not like the weather during daytime. at all. i slept during the day when i did not have classes then i was awake at night. but i try to get as much sleep as i can because my health is declining. i think.

also this year felt like it had 3 sequels. unnecessary, boring, full-of-jump-scares type of sequels. fuck.

2. feeling anxious and chill at the same time.

the only thing that made me feel chill at the latter part of the year is the fact that this shit... like all these shitty things we’ve been doing... will pass anyway. 

i don’t know if it’s because of the new system that was implemented but it definitely feels like the stress levels were high only during exam weeks. for real. i am grateful to have THAT kind of “stress privilege (??)” but i also wish i was stressing over something that gives me LIFE. i know i’m studying for something that will actually help me provide something for myself and for my family but my soul (oh crap here’s where things get cheesy) screams i should do something else. 

my friend always tells me to chill but i couldn’t because there’s always that nagging thought that i have to do something productive everyday. i think it stems from past disappointments, failed expectations from ppl close to me, and just basically feeling like a failure. i’m a frantic mess who somehow has the time to do unnecessary things. wish the energy was put into finishing acads on time or earlier, but here we are. think they meant that i should be chill with mysef. to be kind to myself. to not panic and breathe.

another thing is that there’s a load of information shoved in my head that really paralyzes me to act on something.

3. leaving behind the things i’ve outgrown.

it’s so funny how i’ve met few new people this year who i already treasure only to have quite a number of people to walk out of my life.

it’s not really surprising to me. i think we all wanted it to happen anyway. i’m just happy that things kind of subtly fell apart for things to make more sense. the feeling is kind of like how a misplaced puzzle piece is put into its rightful place. finally, i don’t have to force myself and i think the feelings are mutual. anyway, this year was a revelation in itself despite how dragging the pacing felt. love how the gunk went out and i see now what i’ve been blind to. chuck the deuce! definitely a thank u, next moment.

4. meeting new people, unexpected unions.

i definitely did not expect to form connections and be reunited with some of my old friends this year. also witnessed deepened friendships. 

there’s always this thing where i put my energy on a high level when i’m meeting new people just to seem decent and happy then slowly revealing how tired, sad, and boring i can be. then there’s that fear of losing people’s interest in me or people not becoming excited to talk to me about... anything really. never thought i’d have this fear of losing certain people in my life. i want to detach myself from that and from people themselves too (in a healthy way ofc). 

i’ve never ever felt like i could lose people in an instant. there’s that thing where i worry if i’m too much or i’m lacking for people. so i appreciate people who let me know if i’m crossing the line or if i’m doing something that completely annoys them because i really want to be part of people’s lives, meaningfully and genuinely. a good one. i don’t want to half-ass my relationships with other people and i seek loving relationships that thrive and inspire where it doesn’t only get good at the start but is continually progressing even when we don’t see each other often. it’s fascinating how as we get older, we see how relationships are not as simple as we think they are but really are simple at the same time. we have different goals, we are at different stages in our lives, we are facing shit that nobody else seems to understand and things that don’t seem to end, and we can only hope that our mere presence and emotionally available hearts will listen to whatever the other person has to unburden. 

to somehow let them know that they don’t need permission to rest and to do things that they are afraid of pursuing. 

4a. discovering new artists.

AURORA: the most underrated artist for sure. watched every interview/video/set because she is that bitch. her SONGS, man. i swear. she is that ethereal fairy from the forest. her fucking voice just draws me in. she deserved a better role in frozen 2 tho. she needs to be a lead in a musical animated movie. idc idc i said what i said.

beabadoobee: fucking rockstar, reviving the 90s grunge music and looks.

Billie Eilish: a badass. hate how she still stans bieber tho. 

5. daydreaming of a new life.

you don’t know how many times i’ve been dreaming to have a big house. 

it’s time. we really need a new house. i’m not, as what the kids say, vibing with this old house anymore. this is what i wish to leave behind as soon as possible. how do i even get the MONEY to afford it? i’m just hoping for a miracle to happen, you know. i really wish my family gets to be in a better home soon.

i think if u know me, u might have caught me spacing out a few times. 

idk why this always happens. it’s so rude to the person speaking to me but my mind literally drifts off to another planet. it’s not that they’re boring. i just can’t help it. i feel like shit thinking about how many times it has happened to me. 

sometimes, i dream of being this whole new different person. 

someone who is better than who i am. someone who is good at something and is passionate about the things she does. there are a lot of things i am interested in doing but i don’t have the courage to actually do it. idk why i always turn into a statue when i think of things that i wanna do.

6. God.

it’s been a long time. i have lost contact with You but You are always there to patch things up for me. every effin’ time. i cry everytime.

it must be because i was raised in a christian setting. that’s why i always think it’s You who’s working behind the scenes. but still i am grateful.

saved me from certain people.

saved me this semester.

saved me from pulling worthless all-nighters.

provided me financially esp when i thought i had nothing.

prevented a severe acid reflux situation.

gave me new friends.

did literally so many things that saved me from bad situations and people in general like WHO DOES THAT??

7. a life without a plan.

this is literally what i wanted to happen. not carelessly but like where i don’t have to worry about what to do next. just let things be and go with the flow. the first half of this year, i really did not think things through as i normally would and i let plans fall just to enjoy what was in front of me. be at ease and be present during that time. and i did. it was a peaceful, cheery time tbh.

8. every day i wanted to start over just to get over a lot of things.

9. i missed a lot of ppl.

10. i wanted to be held. not by a certain someone. not romantically. but by anyone close to me. *plays i’m with you by avril lavigne*

sometimes we all just need a long hug. that’s all. and it’d be nice to hear more stories from people. :)

11. not everybody will reciprocate the same energy that i send out to them and it’s okay.

this bummed me out. felt like an effin’ loser but i’ve learned that people have businesses to do. life doesn’t always happen the way we want it to.

12. this the final year of college. just finish it already, dumbass. 

13. why can’t i just be kathryn bernardo or AURORA for like a month or a year? i promise i will not ruin their careers lmao.

14. i want to make major changes in my stupid life but money is an issue.

15. the stars are below the sky now.

the state of the environment is the same as of our minds. polluted and overloaded with gibberish to the point that we get scared of doing one thing at a time and where we also don’t throw away the unnecessary baggage/s. 

we’re so intent on doing things all at the same time. finishing everything in one sitting. being productive became an addiction and it scared me how i was becoming affected by this. there’s this constant thought that we collectively share which is to do something by every day and it only adds up to people’s anxiety and depression. social media definitely made us aware of mental illnesses/disorders but then it became a trend. people self-diagnose themselves and end up with the wrong treatment. some people use it as a tool to get followers and... ugh it’s all a mess. i hope people get the right treatment/s AND/or professional help because if they don’t, they’ll lose themselves. i mean... just look at the sky. there’s literally no sign of a star now if u live in the city. we’ve lost sight of what should guide us. we are unconsciously following a false light thru our devices. 

i’m not good at analogies or at explaining things as u can tell. but moving on...

this hyper self-awareness that i have gained from social media has its advantages but is also distracting me from living my best life. i didn’t realize that i was making my own christmas lights inside my seemingly dark mind when really... it’s just clouded by all this information that’s coming in fast and has affected who i am and certain areas of my life. i’ve almost forgotten this and i’ve come to believe again that there’s always an ever-present light and it will take time to get used to its brightness once my mind gets clearer by the day. hopefully, it will.

anyway, CLIMATE CHANGE IS REAL AND WE NEED TO SAVE EARTH. 

16. men are trash. 

17. the people who i should avoid always looks odd or unpleasant and has bad energy. i know shit when i sense one. 

18. i’m not happy with my life and with who i am but i’ll work with what i’ve got.

life gives u a mirror and shits on your face. sheesh.

for some reason, i can’t forget what my adviser told me during my 4th year of high school. she told me “it seems like you’re a person full of regrets” and every time i have a cryfest, i think of that. idk why. (never underestimate the power of a few words, folks). you know how like in flow charts, u encounter decision points? the diamond shapes? i think i always decide no and end up with the worst consequence and then there’s no more starting over. 

i don’t think i understand flow charts well. ugh. 

i can’t come up with a cool transition to me having insecurities so let’s say i did!

some people’s beauty, inspiring. but others just make you feel like shit.

i really want to explore my feminine side more because i was more masculine when i was younger. i’m not gentle, i’m a bit aggressive. and it just doesn’t fit with who i want to be. idk why. and also, it’s fun (!!!). you get a taste of what it’s like and it’s so EMPOWERING at least for the short experience that i had. but can make me feel very conscious of my entire being and i just end up wearing cartoony disguises. ironic but BABY STEPS. when i think about it, there’s really no black or white answer whether this or that is feminine or masculine.  

self-love is not a 5-step process. 

it is continuous improvement of oneself to the point where you don’t give a fuck about what they say. i really envy the ones who are comfortable in their own skin, who are totally embracing their flaws. they just bloom. some people just look like them. like it’s SO THEM. unmistakably them. and i think if everyone had that, we would not have standards anymore.

oh, to live in a time where individuality is encouraged but is also discouraged when not lived up to its standards. hurray.

19. this year was the year of mindless decisions. periodt.

20. hoping that the new year, 2020, will be the year of CLARITY where i know who i really am, embracing it, and where i will not be taking anymore of anyone’s bullshit. where i know where i stand in my relationships with other people and vice versa. there will be intentional but meaningful endings that will pave the way for blossoming beginnings. 

let’s hope it unfolds the way it should be. for the better.

bonus: nobody knows what the fuck they’re doing. everyone’s just going with the flow. be yourself.

note: this is a compilation of thoughts, informally. thank u.

[vapaus-ystavyys-tasaarvo]

Revenge Sandwich Week 1

Okay I’m here to attempt to participate with actual words rather than just maps. I can do this. By the way I haven’t read any other posts yet because I wanted to make mine first! (Because I’m worried that if I do read other people’s posts they’ve already said everything I was going to say and then I don’t have anything. x) I mean, literary analysis really isn’t my strong suit.)

Turns out this book is still such a page-turner for me. :p It’s really reminding me why I loved Dumas books as a kid. I’m already a bit ahead of schedule because I just couldn’t stop reading. But I’ll just talk about this week’s part now.

So yeah, I did vaguely remember some of what happened here but there were a lot of details I’d forgotten. And even things that don’t count as “details”: SOMEHOW I managed to COMPLETELY forget that this was all about politics and Napoleon. I literally read the part about them stopping on Elba and went “hey wait is this a Napoleon thing?” and yes, turns out it was a Napoleon thing.

Anyway.

This story... or at least the beginning is kind of hilariously unsubtle, isn’t it? The book doesn’t exactly make you wonder who are the good guys and the bad guys. (At this point at least. I have the impression that this is going to change.) And Edmond is kind of boringly perfect and like EVERYBODY LOVES HIM except the couple of guys who’re jealous. Although he IS at least kind of charmingly naïve, the poor guy, so he does have at least one fault...

Well also he has a bit of a temper because of course he does, he’s a Dumas protagonist isn’t he? And btw that bit where he’s all like “yeah Danglars and me once had a row so bad that we almost had a duel over it (on Monte Cristo no less, that sure isn’t foreshadowing anything at all) but I’m sure we’ll get along fine from now on and he definitely would never betray me” rhat is EXACTLY the kind of thought process Dumas himself would have. Like I’m 99% sure he’s just outright calling himself out here.

I mean some of the characters do get some complexity already. M. Morrel is introduced as kind of a greedy bastard who just cares about his cargo rather than that his captain died, but then turns out that he genuinely cares about Edmond and is ready to even risk his own reputation to help him. Caderousse is an envious, selfish bastard but he’s also somewhat sympathetic. (Again, because he defends Edmond... this seems to be a bit of a trend here. Liking Edmond makes you more sympathetic. xD) And then there’s Villefort who’s... well he’s a really compelling character and I find him fascinating and I want to read more about him but I also hhhhate him as a person. :p Yuck, prosecutors. I feel like washing my hands. And I just see red when his only motivation to do the right thing seems to be just to please his fiancée and he like fantasizes about telling Renée about how nice he was. Ewww dude, you are the worst.

Renée is interesting because I kinda genuinely do like her but on the other hand she’s way too happy to marry Villefort which makes me side-eye her a bit. I mean yeah she’s an upper-class woman and probably doesn’t have endless choices about matters of love but still. (Also she doesn’t mind the death penalty apparently unless it’s for political prisoners. >__<) Well, we’ll see how things turn out. I hope she’ll keep showing up.

I do really like all the political stuff, even if it seems to be more about the intrigue and the plot than the kind of manifesto masquerading as a novel that Les Mis is. But I enjoy both kinds. :p It’s a fun contrast too, given that these are novels set approximately in the same era. (And Dumas still finds time to make fun of the Royalists which I appreciate.)

Oh but there seems to be quite a lot of class discussion too, right? Which is interesting. I’d really like to see where it goes.

Uh... that’s pretty much all the at least somewhat structured thoughts I had for now? Like I said, this isn’t really my strong suit.

Some random reactions and comments that I wrote down:

‘-- if it were known that you gave a packet to the marshal and spoke to the emperor, you might be compromised.’

‘How could it compromise me, Monsieur?’

Oh you sweet summer child...

‘I shall always have the highest regard for those who enjoy the confidence of my owners.’

That’s an interesting way to translate “mes armateurs”. (I had to check what it was in the original text, it felt so weird.)

- I love the bit about Les Catalans. It just appeals to me a lot, that kind of sense of a tiny community with an interesting history. I just appreciate it in a story (although I don’t really know how accurately they’re portrayed here and of course we only seem to get to meet two people from there.)

- Another thing is the strong sense of the era, it’s just very very 1815. I like it.

- Mercédès’s speech to Fernand is probably the most blatant kind of exposition dialogue ever lol

- Also at points it feels like maybe you don’t need to remind us that they’re Catalan like literally every time you talk about them? Especially with Fernand, omg. (And who says “with your Catalan knife” when they’re also Catalan themself?)

- So far I like Mercédès though, I don’t really have much to say about her otherwise. Fernand creeps me out, like he’s obviously meant to. He seriously doesn’t seem to care about Mercédès’s feelings AT ALL as long as she doesn’t kill herself. >___< 

- All the talk about it being bad luck to call a woman her fiancés name before they’re married and a man captain before he’s been formally appointed... there’s SO MUCH FORESHADOWING HERE OMG. I get it, everything is going to go horribly wrong! Stop reminding me!

- Danglars, why did you even talk in front of Caderousse? I don’t get it at allll. I mean at first I thought the novel was going to have Caderousse, Danglars and Fernand all conspire together against Edmond and I was so confused about Caderousse being there because he seriously didn’t have a good enough reason to hate Edmond... I’m glad it didn’t go that way but now I’m just baffled by Danglars.

- I don’t have much to say about Danglars in general, he’s probably the most one dimensional character so far. I mean I appreciate his twisted mind because it makes him a scarier villain but otherwise... I don’t know, we’ll see.

-  Btw isn’t it a bit weird how even though we get told that Edmond has all these friends and how all these people really love and respect him but they don’t really get named or introduced at all? Instead all the focus is on the three people who actually aren’t great friends. Just a thought. It’s weird.

‘a commissioner wearing his sash is no longer a man but a statue of the law, cold, deaf and dumb.’

Hah. :D

‘but, dammit, though he’s a Royalist and the crown prosecutor, he is also a man and not, I believe, a wicked one.’

‘No’, said Danglars. ‘Though I have heard it said that he is ambitious, which is much the same.’

Oh snap. Okay I really like that line even though it’s Danglars saying it.

- All the coincidences, like the foreshadowing and the character introductions, ARE NOT SUBTLE AT ALL. Buuuut then again what are you even reading 19th C. lit for if you don’t appreciate Poignant Coincidences....

- Uggghhh all the talk about trials is disgusting. Yuck yuck yuck. Hhhhate. The sheer lack of empathy in everybody except Renée. Also Villefort, HOW IS IT ANYTHING LIKE A DUEL WTF. Let’s make a list: a) duels are supposed to be agreed upon by both parties, b) it’s supposed to be balanced, not favouring one of the parties, c) both should be facing the same risks. YOU LITERALLY HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE, YOUR OPPONENT HAS EVERYTHING ON THE LINE. ARGH.

- did I mention that I hhhate him?

‘Nowadays, the sword has been put aside and the gown is supreme: there is a wise Latin tag to that effect.’

‘Cedant arma togae,’ Villefort said, with a bow.

‘I did not dare to attempt it in Latin,’ the marquise replied.

Okay, relatable. x) (obviously I don’t like her either but)

‘So the guilty man has been arrested,’ said the marquise.

‘You mean, the accused man,’ said Renée.

Thank you, Renée, the only half decent human being in this party.

This restore to us had a revolutionary ring to the ears of the crown prosecutor’s deputy.

Fucking royalists, omg. (I do appreciate Dumas snarking about them.)

settled his features in front of the mirror into their grandest expression and sat down, dark and threatening, behind his desk.

Omg Villefort you dork.

- Also: interrogating a suspect while also thinking ahead to how cleverly you can tell people about it later: like this guy is simultaneously so relatable and so disgusting. It’s both hilarious and enraging. (Idk, it probably hits me particularly hard because he feels like such a real person.)

happiness makes even wicked men good.

Another good line.

‘To whom was it addressed?’

‘To Monsieur Noirtier, Rue Coq-Héron, in Paris.’

Oh shit... Suddenly it makes sense that Edmond ends up in prison. >_______<

- Aaaa poor Edmond has all the power here and he just doesn’t KNOW.

- I don’t have anything to say about the next chapter, just AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaa

- This part has gotten so much harder to read as an adult tbh.

Villefort ran out but, on reaching the door, realized that the sight of a deputy crown prosecutor in such a hurry could upset the tranquility of an entire town, so he slowed to his normal pace, which was quite magisterial.

Omg this guy. I swear.

- Villefort is having his Storm Inside A Skull moment except he put HIMSELF into this situation and of course he turns out to be an Anti-Valjean if anything. It really feels like an echo of the same scene though, even to the point of being interrupted and pushed towards the final decision by someone coming to tell them that the carriage is ready.

- I don’t have much in terms of thoughts about the chapters with Louis XVIII. Mostly I just kept wondering how historically accurate this was. xD

Okay, that’s all I had. Time to read everybody else’s things!

[attackofthezee]

The fic I’m working on that’s not that ABO one I shared part of the other day (Still Shrinkyclinks tho lbr)

Hey, who wants the beginning of what is currently called “probably accidentally roommates tbh but started as a burglar au inspired by that one post” in my google docs? Idk who, but guess what? You’re getting it. The whole thing is based on this and @writinfreak gets all the credit for telling me Bucky should be looking for a place to squat for a while and not actually looking to rob Steve. 

This is unedited af and probably has mistakes, so beware. 

EDIT: This gets reblogged and liked occasionally so here, have a link to the actual fic!

Click here to read Where The Heart Is!

When Steve gets home from work there’s someone in his apartment. A tall, foreboding, and goddamned metal armed someone is in his apartment, perched on Steve’s countertop and eating a sandwich like he hasn’t broken into Steve’s apartment.

Steve reaches blindly for the Maglite that sits next to his door and briefly contemplates his chances of beating a man twice his size with nothing but a heavy flashlight. The flashlight, in it’s defense, works miraculously well as a weapon in most cases. He’s just not so sure of it’s efficiency against the scary looking asshole currently occupying Steve’s kitchen.

“Uh, who the fuck are you and what the fuck are you doing in my apartment?”

The man turns to look at Steve, brow wrinkling as he takes him in. “I thought this place was vacant.” He says, shrugging like he hasn’t broken into Steve’s apartment.

“Yeah, well it’s not. It’s very much occupied. By me.”

“I see that.” The man says, setting down his sandwich casually, on Steve’s countertop, in Steve’s apartment that may Steve remind everyone, he broke into. “I didn’t know someone was already squatting here.” He adds and hops down from Steve’s countertop like he might be about to leave.

Steve breathes a sigh of relief, prepared to chalk this whole thing up as some weird experience or a frankly, insane hallucination. Until, that is, he properly processes what the man had just said.

“I’m not squatting here!” He insists, voice going a little pitchier than he’d like if he’s honest with himself. (He’s not.) “I live here. I pay rent and everything.”

The man blinks slowly, like Steve’s just said something baffling. “You live here? You don’t even have a bed.”

“I have a bed.” Steve insists, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly, still clutching the flashlight in his hand. Sure, a sleeping bag on the floor doesn’t seem like much of a bed, but it’s still technically a bed, okay? Steve’s pretty sure it still falls into the category of being at the very least bed like.

“That,” The man says, jabbing a finger at Steve’s makeshift bed in the corner, “is not a bed.” His expression darkens for a moment, but before Steve has a chance to worry about what the random, crazy guy talking to him is going to do he’s speaking again. “Give me a few hours, I’ll be back.”

Before Steve can get a word in edgewise, the man is turning around and leaping out Steve’s window like it’s no big deal. When Steve crosses the apartment and sticks his head out the window, the man is nowhere to be seen and Steve takes a moment to wonder if this isn’t all some weird hallucination brought on by a lack of sleep and maybe one of his meds. Maybe he should google for side effects, find out if vivid hallucinations are one of the side effects no one thinks to warn people of.

Three hours later, the man barges back into Steve’s apartment. He’s carrying a frankly incredible amount of stuff and there’s a redhead with a stack of pizza boxes trailing behind him.

“This is Natalia, Natalia this is… Hey what’s your name? I forgot to ask.”

“Steve.” He’s too flabbergasted to say more than that, absolutely baffled by the way his day is going so far.

“Call me Natasha.” The redhead says, setting the stack of pizzas down on Steve’s countertop. “You have my sincerest apologies for James, he’s still learning how to be a human being.” She shoots the man- James- a pointed look that he entirely ignores in favor of dumping the pile of things he’s carrying on the floor. There’s a lot of parts of things that Steve is assuming can be put together to form actual items, but mostly it just looks like chaos.

“Don’t listen to her, my name’s Bucky.” The man- James- Bucky says before he’s disappearing out the door again, leaving Steve standing there, probably looking like an idiot with his mouth hanging open.

“I think your friend might be a little insane.” Steve tells the redhead. “Maybe a little more than a little.” Who the hell breaks into someone’s house and then brings them furniture and pizza?!

Natasha just shrugs and flips open the lid on one of the pizza boxes. “That’s actually pretty likely. He means well though.”

“So he’s not going to murder me in my sleep or something?” Steve asks, accepting a slice of pizza when Natasha shoves one into his hand with a look that practically dares Steve not to accept it.

“He probably won’t, no.” Natasha doesn’t sound reassuring at all.

Before Steve can question it further Bucky appears again, this time carrying a mattress and looking not at all like it’s difficult. Steve does not spend a moment surreptitiously eying the muscles that allow him to do such a thing, no, not at all. This is still a stranger who broke into his home. Whether or not they’re a kind stranger that is attempting to furnish Steve’s apartment, and whether or not they thought the place was vacant is moot.

Bucky doesn’t say anything to Steve yet, just levels a look at Natasha. “You could help, ya know?”

Nat fixes him with a flat look and takes a bite of pizza pointedly. “I helped. I brought up the pizza. Now I’m helping eat the pizza.”

Bucky scowls at her, and mutters something under his breath that Steve can’t quite catch before he’s disappearing once more. Steve decides it might be best not to question how this is his life and shoves a bite of pizza into his mouth.

Roughly an hour later, Steve is sitting in a brand new chair, (Brand new for him that is. The chair appears to have had at least a few other owners before Steve.) watching Bucky attempt to put together a bed frame. It doesn’t seem to be going well, if the low level muttering is anything to go by.

“I can just sleep on the mattress on the floor, seriously.” Steve says, rolling his eyes when Bucky scowls at him.

“It’s not good for the mattress to have it on the floor.” Bucky’s words are followed by a triumphant noise when he manages to fit two pieces together. “I can put a goddamned mattress frame together, it can’t be that hard.”

“Sure it’s not.” Natasha says, seated on the floor near Bucky, has somewhere along the line taken out a bag of gummy bears that she’s steadily working her way through while seeming to have a wonderful time watching Bucky get increasingly frustrated.

Steve’s determined that Natasha is fearless, because Steve definitely wouldn’t be that comfortable sitting that close to an increasingly agitated man with a metal arm.

“You should be nicer to me, I’m brain damaged.” Bucky says with an exaggerated wounded expression.

Natasha doesn’t react to that in any other way than to throw a gummy bear with frightening accuracy to hit Bucky square between the eyes.

Later, once Bucky’s gotten the furniture all put together and they’ve eaten Chinese (an order that Natasha refused to let anyone else pay for and was big enough that Steve thinks he’ll have leftovers for at least the next two days), Natasha declares that she really needs to be going.

She surprises Steve by drawing him into a hug and promising to drop in again soon before she makes Bucky accompany her out the front door.

Steve has no shame over the fact that he stands on the other side of the paper thin walls and listens in to their parting conversation.

“You should let someone other than me know that you’re okay, James.” Natasha’s speaking low, but Steve can hear her clearly enough to make her words out and Steve gives thanks to his apartment for being so shitty.

“I will. Eventually. There’s still things I need to do, things I have to figure out.”

“And this is how you’re doing that?” Steve doesn’t know Natasha very well, but he can almost picture her raising her eyebrows at Bucky incredulously.

“Yes. The internet says you’re not allowed to judge my coping strategies, Natalia.”

“Far be it for me to judge.”

There’s silence for a long moment, the sounds of shuffling and then Bucky’s voice again.

“I’ll call you soon, okay? Check in, let you know I haven’t gone off the deep end.”

“Good, because I won’t hesitate to hunt you down James.”

There’s another moment of silence and then Bucky is swinging the door back open and descending on Steve’s apartment once more.

“This is still considered breaking and entering.” Steve says and waves a finger at Bucky to emphasize his point.