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#i wasnt around for like the anne rice shit but
expfcultragreen · 1 year
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Tldr: i have always been aware that i am awful in the ways in which i am awful
...but i can always choose to be more honest about it and i have done a lot of drugs and gotten a lot of brain damage since i was a cptsd-cyborg growing up in the pnw. I think i turned out ok its just fucked up how slowly that was allowed to happen and i resent how low-info the world i grew up in was. Viva the new enlightenment. This is the dawning of the age of awoke w/ us. Highvibe nation whatwhat, etc. Speaking of highschool, the alty kids who were too cool for everyone were all in an amnesty international club together that like some well-leftoid [i flatter myself to say this applies to me, too, finally] to-the-manner-born [i wish] anarkiddie had started years earlier or whatever. I didnt know what the fuck amnesty international was and i never looked it up because i was like "candle with barbed wire around it, arm bands, gotcha. Maybe i'll ~care about Stuff in ~college but for now i unabashedly care only about new episodes of sex and the city and rereading anne rice novels. Oh and buffy!" (Is the uncomfortably stark whiteness of that shit still telegraphic like it was to the amnesty international club kids? Because the most culturally enriching media in my life in hs was antm which started at the end--and the fact that i was a massive weeb. These were the limits of my horizons at the time. Hilarious. What a way to be.) Point being, they were what we would today call woke, because now white people know that word and have distorted it into an intended insult, but at the time there wasnt anything pithy to call them derisively for being cooler than i was so to deflect/project my own insecurities about being utterly clueless and objectively uncool (insecurities i had because i could approximately grasp that these things were entirely true, even without the necessary context to have done better or to truly have known my insecurities werent just residual social anxiety from being all puberty-riddled like i constantly massaged into my brain as a cope; also i percieved the cooler kids i alienated by being all zomboidal as being snobbish and overly cynical, and there were only like a dozen of them anyway in a school of 1000+ students whose good graces and high opinions i didnt covet), i called them the fashion club, like from daria. As if to suggest that they were all mindlessly hopping on some highbrow trend of "advanced" leftism (i was a teenage ndp campaigner, i thought the amnesty club kids were "doing too much," to have a focus beyond party politics in highschool) their champagne swilling glitterati parents had tuned them in to, yet from my pov most of them had the pretention of basically drafting themselves as child soliders or some shit in these overseas conflicts they actually knew and inherently cared about. I didnt even know who Che Guevara was, starting hs with these kids. They were actually drafting themselves as child soliders, in the culture war. They did all dress very chic, they had matured frames of reference and shoplifting chops. Mild affiliation/cross-pollination with the slightly nicer and way dorkier theatre kids via the Openly Gay Kid contingent. Naturally i never counted as Openly Gay because i was "bi" and they didnt care who i was dating plus "everyone's bi" so i didnt get any latent solidarity points for being out in hs, which seemed arbitrary at the time because their whole universe seemed to be a matrix of solidarity points, and the gold star jr gays were like there on a ticket of Being The Gay Accessory......but aaaactually, i had obviously managed to say and do a bunch of heinously braindead awkward-kid-with-fash-parents-but-the-kid-doesnt-even-get-that-yet-beyond-the-level-of-personal-grievance-with-their-restrictiveness type stuff and they had all written me off as pointless. Fair play to them, i had so much catching up to do. I think mostly theyre yuppies now. Except for the ones who got really into the 60s and no one ever saw them again, fade out
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not that i have any intention of making offensive CR content but do they actually get to make dictations like that or is fan content still protected by fair use even if it goes against what CR deam “inappropriate”?
like this is a genuine question I have no idea how this shit works
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