#i would’ve been sobbing in the senate bathroom

[thatrandomblogsays]

It’s a fun video, check her out @what-is-my-aesthetic

My favorite part was her immediately checking out CSPAN footage after showing my meme and…

Mood girlie, mood…

(if you had kept watching you would’ve seen the senators almost break into a brawl…)

[millers-planet]

Concern - Obi-Wan x F!Reader

Storyline/ Prompt: we accept the love we think we deserve. (fic inspired loosely by that quote from perks of being a wallflower)

Warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of abusive relationships, SAPPY

POV: Obi-Wan’s

Word Count: ~2600

I only saw her once every so often, usually when she was with Padmé, who was always with Anakin. She was never happy when she was with the senator, always crying or fixing herself up, I could only assume how she got them. She had the wrinkles of what use to be a happy person, with defined smile lines around her mouth and less-obvious forehead crinkles. However, I’ve never seen the infamous smile that must’ve caused these indents.

I picked up on her name only once, when Anakin was saying goodbye to the two ladies, “bye Padmé, Y/N.” From the second I heard her voice, I couldn’t stop thinking about what other things there was to know about her. Has she ever left Coruscant? What did she do for a living? How did she meet Padmé? Why was she always hiding bruises? I regretted every missed opportunity and chance I had to ask her these questions. She was a forbidden book, only because I knew she’d lead me down a road I couldn’t follow, not without breaking the rules I’ve sworn myself to.

These bruises haunted the echos of my thoughts. Poorly blended makeup over dark discoloration wasn’t hard to miss, especially when she was constantly trying to keep her hand on it. It wasn’t often that I saw her, but when I did, these were always a continuous look on her. I never understand why people treat precious material, precious literature that must have hundreds of stories to tell, so poorly.

While she is that locked book, this never stopped me from having small and meaningless conversation. There was one incident where she seemed happy, giving me an opening to meet her formally on a positive note. “Anakin, who’s this?” I looked at her briefly and smiled, sticking my hand out.

When she flinched at my arm moving toward her, I had to plaster a pokerface to prevent me from dropping to a concerned look. “This is Y/N, Padmé met her through the senate,” Anakin looked to her with a face that said ‘you can trust him’ which made her release a bit of tension. “Y/N, this is Obi-Wan Kenobi, he’s my Master.”

“Obi-Wan? That sounds familiar..” she eventually shook my hand and smiled as her face lit up with the answer, “General Kenobi!” She had a contagious laugh that came out gently and warm, I was finally able to see the infamous smile that has caused all of those wonderful smile-lines. Y/N seemed sweet and innocent, I would’ve believed she was this kind of person if I hadn’t seen her patch herself up so many times or if I hadn’t noticed the nearly fully healed bruised on her wrist. 

Padmé interrupted me as I was about to continue the conversation, “we should get going, there’s a meeting we’re going to be late for. It was great see you Obi-Wan.” She smiled when she looked at Anakin, “by Ani.” With that, she was gone, as quickly as she appeared. 

Ever since then I tried to figure out some way to get into a senate meeting with Anakin and Padmé, with the hope of seeing Y/N again. Of course, this was delusional behavior because, realistically, she could be nothing more than a fantasy... not even that. She would be trouble for me, I know I should cut things off fully with her, but part of me remained worried about her.

I began visiting at his chambers less in the morning, meaning I’d have a lower chance of running into her. This was rough at first, not only because Anakin lectured me over how he enjoyed walking to training with me, but also because the thoughts of her only intensified. I hoped that by decreasing the exposure risk of her, it’d lower this mindless obsession, but it’s only increased with curiosity about how she was doing and if she was okay.

The one time I did walk to Anakin’s chambers in the morning, Y/N was there, so was Padmé. The door had just a sliver of it open, just enough for sound to get through and enough for me to see her. She had fresh bandages on her arms and new bruises over herself, she was frantic as she cried to Padmé, “why am I still with him?”

“You need to leave him, Y/N, there is nothing good coming from this relationship.” The senator’s voice was pleading to the other politician, trying to make her realize the truth and side with reason.

Y/N swallowed down a sob as she continued on, “he said he was done with all of.... this! I believed him, too, because he didn’t for awhile, so I thought we got past it, only it was temporary.” I saw her figure stop and sit down on some bench or couch, touching her eyes to wipe away tears. “I wish I could just walk away, but it’s so much more complicated than that.”

Padmé’s voice broke from calm to persuasive with hints of anger, “but it’s not! Y/N, it is not that complicated. Pack you stuff, come move in with me, get out of there.” Her arm draped around her friend, “I’m more worried about you than ever.” 

There was a pause in the conversation before they continued onward, Y/N’s sighed and stood up, “no, Padmé, I can’t. There is too much at risk if I leave. If I go, there could be so many rumors started about where my priorities are at or other stupid things. But, we both know what gossip can do to someone.” I saw Y/N walk out of view, then a door opened and then closed after a second, it sounded like the bathroom.

“What was that all about?” It was Anakin. “Actually, tell me later, Obi-Wan is probably here. Bye.” He opened the door and swiftly closed it behind him, pushing a loose hair out of his face before smiling, “good morning, Master. I didn’t keep you waiting long, did I?”

I shook my head slightly before walking toward the training hall, “no, I got here only just a moment ago.” I shouldn’t ask about what just happened, though, what if she really is in danger? It’s not like it’s any of my business, though... “Early morning company?”

“Yeah, Padmé and Y/N came over again. She is going through a bit of a rough patch with her boyfriend, that’s all. When she wants to get away, her and Padmé come over to my chambers because-” Anakin caught himself as if he was about to say something he shouldn’t. “Because they know he won’t come searching near the Jedi area.”

Ever since then, not a moment passed by when she didn’t cross my thoughts. At night, I began romanticizing the idea of rescuing her, like some hero. I stir up dreams of following her back to her place and going to it when only her “lover” was home, just to show him a lesson. I have to remember, despite all this, that my job here is only to be a peacekeeper, but the idea of taking that forward step into this seems like the right answer.

When I was making pretend-scenarios of this rescue-op, I would imagine engaging in a conversation with her after I ran into her confessing the truths of her relationship to Padmé. I would generate possible starters of how I would ask her about all of this, possible things I would say to comfort her, or just all-around things to talk to her about. Maybe, instead of convincing her to just leave her boyfriend, I could convince her to leave him for me. 

No, that’s selfish. I can’t do that just because I like the idea of her, just because she’s what occupies my thoughts most of the days. There are so many rules I’m breaking just now, without even talking to her anymore. If I was wise, I would talk about this to Master Yoda. If I was wise, I would have Anakin talk to her for me because he would have a bigger chance of making any impact, since I’m only a General she knows nothing about.

To compromise with myself, I’ll be... somewhat oblivious. I’ll forget what I’ve heard and seen, only if it doesn’t come up again. I will quit all of these meaningless thoughts and daydreaming because they are doing me no good, but if I run into her crying in Anakin’s chambers more than often, I’ll engage in those conversation that should remain solely as a fantasy. Unfortunately, this is exactly what happened, three times in just a week.

It was the same conversation between Y/N and Padmé, only this time each of them was more emotional. I wasn’t able to hear anything other than, “Y/N, he is going to hurt you so bad you won’t recover, and I won’t know what to do.” This was the final straw, this has begun to spiral out of control and I need to step in, in some way.

Just at the perfect timing, Anakin came through the door. Before he could say good morning, as he usually does, I intervened. “I can’t pretend anymore that I’m blind to what’s going on between Y/N and her boyfriend. Anakin, what is happening? Why is she still with him?”

My padawan sighed as he guided us toward our usual walk, only slower. “They have been together for a few years, since they both began in the public sector of work. It wasn’t always like this, according to Padmé. They were both happy, for a long time, but ever since the trade issues began, the way she’s been treated has declined.” Anakin stopped talking and turned to face me, pulling me to the side, looking me head-on. “You can’t say anything about this, I’m technically not even supposed to know. Please, Obi-Wan, pretend this never happened.”

“Anakin, something has to be done, there has to be something we can do for her.” My voice was pleading, when I realized how concerned I sounded, I noticed how suspicious it was, as well, for me to be so concerned for a politician. “You know that if I could, I would leave this alone, but the conversations between Padmé and Y/N in the mornings have progressed so much. They’ve turned from conversations of advice to conversations of begging for reason,” my voice was firm and less emotional, making me seem more serious, hopefully.

He sighed and looked around, considering a response. “Do what you want, but you didn’t hear any of this from me. Talk to her tonight, she’ll be at my chambers again with Padmé, most likely.” I furrowed my brows together, in confusion. “It’s what’s been happening these past few nights, so it’s a possibility she’ll do it again. She leaves about 7 to go back home. Now, can we go?” I nodded and continued our normal regimen, only, my mind was galaxies away.

If she lives in her chambers, I could take the long way around to my chambers, then break off to head to Anakin’s, making me run into her. However, if she lives with her boyfriend in his room, then I’m out of luck. Though, if I take the main lobby, that increased the chance of our paths colliding, but it’d make it more public. I can’t walk back with Anakin because it’d be too obvious.

I need to clear my mind, I shouldn’t be trying to plan ahead like this, I will know what is right when the time calls for it. Whatever feels like the proper path will be the correct choice, but I can’t know what it is until then. If I’m going to talk to her tonight, I should have that clear head to make proper decisions. I’ll meditate until then, Anakin has his own tasks to do today, I believe he was meeting with the Chancellor. 

Pulling myself together as I sat down on an open spot with a nice view, I took deep breaths. My focus drifted away from all of these issues at hand and just drifted off. Everything relaxed, everything was still, and everything made sense again. I forget what really matters in this universe, and coming back to here makes it all better. I was in this state of meditation for a few hours, occasionally interrupted from loud distraction that were brief as I pulled myself back into concentration. When I was finally out, it was just a little before seven, giving me plenty of time to take that long route to my chambers.

I walked at a steady pace, not thinking ahead of the conversations we might have or of anything else, other than my destination. Keeping this clear mind will be fine, whatever happens, happens. Me overthinking does nothing to help, these past few hours has helped me realize that. The familiar hall designs pulled me from my zen state, I was in my hallway, with Y/N just a few feet down the hall. “Obi-Wan?” she called happily, picking up the pace to catch up to me.

The biggest smile spread across my face as those beautiful smile lines beamed right back at me, her bubbly aura flowing off of her. However, her body spoke a different energy, it cried out with pain and discomfort as the bruises stuck out like sore thumbs. “Hey, Y/N, right?” She nodded. “Are you alright, you look a little.... shaken up?”

She sighed shakily, she smile never leaving her face as she hesitantly rubbed her arm that was coated with markings. “Yeah, everything’s all good, how are you?” I pushed her hand down, off of her arm, revealing the dark welts once more. “Obi-Wan, please, don’t. I hear enough from Padmé.”

“I think we both know what needs to happen, I think we all know what is the best.” Her smile finally broke off of her face, her lip quivering. “You are so strong, Y/N, but there is so much love in you that’s being thrown away by wasting it on your boyfriend.” I put her chin between my thumb and index finger and pulled her weepy eyes to look at mine.

My hand instinctively moved up to her cheek, cupping it gently, she leaned into it, obviously comforted by it. “I don’t know how to do it, I feel like I’m throwing so many years of my life away.” She pulled away as she dried her tears, “I know there’s nothing left for me with him, but I can’t let go, there’s so many things I’m ruining by letting go.”

I sighed, “what was there was ruined long ago, Y/N.” She began tearing up as she heard what I said, not calling me out on it, obviously realizing what I said was true. “If you want, you can spend the night with me. You can come sleep on this tonight and do it tomorrow. Or, I’ll take you to him and you can do it now, then we can head back to my place.”

Her sniffles quickly ended as she wiped her sleeve on her nose, looking up to me with those watery eyes that just melted every bit of me. “Really?” I nodded. “Can we do it tonight? I know I won’t have the energy to face him tomorrow.”

“Of course we can, I’ll walk you there. You just go inside, make things quick, stay in there for as little as possible, you might just make things worse if you’re in there for awhile.” I saw her hands fidget and shake as I went on, just wanting to prepare her. “I’m right outside, though. If I hear anything, you won’t be alone.”

She nodded and began to lead the way. “Obi?”

“Yeah?”

Y/N ran herself into me and let out a built-up sigh, “thank you,” she spoke softly as she briefly wrapped her arms around me before moving forward.

tags: @blondekel77 @mysticdeerpolice @gabile18 

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[redrobinhoood]

catch me i'm falling | one-shot

A/N: There’s not enough angst in the Foxiyo fandom and I’m here to fix that. Full work posted here, optional AO3 link.

AO3 Link | 1,800 words (approx)

Summary: Riyo regrets the view from her window. All it has ever done is give her a look at her world as it falls apart. [Unrated, Major Character Death]

For the second time in her life, Riyo regretted the view out of her window. The first time, Fox had been called on with the highest priority and run to his command. She had been preparing for bed by herself when she noticed a new light from her bedroom window. Opening the blinds, she had beheld the Jedi Temple in flames. That night, she had sat in her living room until dawn, clutching a cup of tea as she watched the Temple burn. She hadn’t seen Fox again for a week, until he’d appeared at her office with empty eyes and very little to say. Then, he had held her as she cried for all they had lost.

Now, she had been preparing for bed, alone once again, when she heard the muffled explosion. She ran to the living room to watch as a plume of smoke rose from the side of the Jedi Temple. She could’ve sworn she saw a green blade dancing with a red one amongst the smoke. But that was impossible, the Jedi were gone. She saw the patrol transport move towards the blast site and wondered what was going on. She wondered if Fox was there. He had been ordered to secure the Jedi Temple for reasons unknown. Surely he was still on-site. She swallowed the panic rising in her throat, returning to the bathroom to brush out the unnatural curls that her senatorial hairstyling had left behind. Seconds later, the second explosion shook her mirror and she ran back to the window to see smoke rising from a neighborhood bordering the Temple. The holonews held no answers for her. Now, once again, she couldn’t sleep. She slipped on a loose pair of pants over the romper she had been wearing and sat down on the couch to watch the smoke billow into the night.

A knock on the door disturbed her. She glanced towards the clock to check the late hour, then rose and walked to the door. She brought up the image of a white and red clone on her doorstep and pressed the button to speak.

“Hello?”

“Senator Chuchi, it’s Jek.”

Of course it was, she could see very clearly his distinctive marks from wear and tear across his armor. She couldn’t shake the feeling of unease that the late visit had brought to her. Still, it was Jek. She opened the door. “What brings you here at this hour, Jek?” She hadn’t seen him, nor any of the clones besides Fox, in weeks. They had been overwhelmed by the formation of their new Empire and the government was in chaos.

Jek sighed and took off his helmet so that she could see his face. He wasn’t crying, nor had he been crying, but he looked like he was on the verge of bursting into tears. “Thire sent me. Commander Fox is dead.”

For a moment, she wondered who Commander Fox was and why she would want to know if he was dead. Then it hit her that it was her Fox, her beloved commander, and she felt something inside her break. Jek reached out for her as she swayed, steadying her in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck for support, focusing her gaze on the looping tattoo on his neck as she tried to remember how to balance on her legs, how to stand. She’d known that this day may come, that every time she said goodbye to Fox it could be for the last time, but nothing could’ve prepared her for the sheer numbness that was filling her.

“I want to see his body.” The words spilled out before she could think of them in her mind. She almost hoped that he would refuse her, allow her last memory of Fox to be of him leaning down over her on the couch, afternoon sunlight streaming across his features, to kiss her before departing to his station. Was that really only hours ago?

Jek took a deep breath, pulling her closer into a proper hug. “Okay.”

---

He brought her to the wreckage of the patrol transport she had heard crash earlier. Small fires still burnt amongst the twisted remains and the smell of burning metal filled the area. Jek refused to leave the speeder, but pointed her to the white and red armor of Commander Thire, who was talking with the fire suppression team. She made her way over to him, wishing she’d grabbed something with sleeves so that she could’ve covered her nose. He noticed her before she was upon them and stepped back to greet her.

“Riyo.” He sounded tired. The blatant use of her name threw her off for a moment, but she pushed on to stand beside him.

“Thire.” How long had it been since she’d seen him? She knew that he had been involved with the hunt for the Jedi who had attempted to assassinate the then Chancellor, taking perhaps the most proactive role in the Coruscant Guard in the Jedi Purge besides Commander Stone, who had been killed at the Jedi Temple on the night it burned. She wondered how he could sleep at night. Maybe he couldn’t.

She turned her attention from the commander into the wreckage beside them. There were scattered bits of burnt plastoid littering the ground and a few shapes which she recognized as burnt bodies. She bit her tongue as she continued to scan the site. Peeking out from underneath part of the wreckage she could see a pair of familiar boots. Rys. How many times had she seen those boots next to her? She’d know them almost as well she knew her own shoes. She understood why Jek had elected to stay in the speeder. Beside him, a little way away from the wreckage, she saw a set of red armor. She stepped forward but Thire grabbed her and pulled her back. The numbness inside her lifted, making room for crushing despair.

“Please. Please, let me see him. Please. Please. Please!” She fought against his grip as she sobbed, screaming at him to let her go. He didn’t say a thing, just held her until her voice was hoarse and her struggles had stilled. When Thire’s grip on her loosened she nearly fell to the ground. She would have fallen if he had not caught her and pulled her close to him. She didn’t notice the fleeting glances that some of the clones on-site sent her way. None of them approached.

“Riyo, you won’t be able to unsee this. Are you sure?” Thire finally said as he steadied her.

“Please, Thire. I owe him this much.” She wished he’d take off his helmet so that she could plead her case to a man and not a suit of armor. Yet, she couldn’t bear to see Fox’s face staring back at her; or Rys’, or any of the clones that had been on the gunship.

Thire nodded and helped her to her feet. He walked over with her to the red armor- she refused to think of it as Fox- and stood behind her as she fell to her knees beside the body. She reached for the stretch of black between Fox’s chest plate and helmet, slipping her hand under his neck. She was horrified when it bent unnaturally under her touch and she realized how he must have died. Swallowing her fear, she reached instead for his helmet, trying not to jostle his head as she removed it. Thire had knelt down behind her and he now lay his hands on her shoulders. She took Fox’s face in her hands and ran her thumbs numbly across his cheeks. How many times had she done this while he was alive; taken off his helmet and ran her hands across his face as if it belonged to her. She was thankful that his eyes were closed, though a look of sadness was still etched into his brow and lips. She realized that he must’ve begged to be spared in his final moments. She could never picture her proud Fox begging for his life, but maybe he did, for her. She continued to run her thumbs across his face as she took in his features for the last time. She almost missed Thire reaching out from behind her to prod at Fox’s throat.

“The crash didn’t kill him.” He’d taken off his helmet. His voice was level, detached, as if he was going through his thought processes out loud for her benefit. “Neither did our men, there would be bruising. But he was dead long before this ship hit the ground.” He brought his hand back to her shoulder. “It was a nearly instantaneous death, Riyo. He would’ve barely felt it.”

“You know who killed him then.” She didn’t turn around and Thire didn’t answer. “Please, tell me.”

“I did. I was the one who found him, on Mustafar. I brought the medical capsule. I saved his life. This is all my fault.”

Riyo finally turned to look at Thire. He wasn’t crying, but the blank look on his face was worse. She’d been afraid to see Fox in Thire’s face, but felt more afraid when she realized that she couldn’t. “Thire, please.”

“Vader.” He looked out at the debris around them and Riyo felt a chill run down her spine despite the heat. She let out a shaky breath and buried her face in the crook of Fox‘s neck. She almost hoped that she would feel his arms wrap around her as they always had before. But she was too late.

---

Her apartment felt empty. It had always felt empty without Fox there, ever since the first night he had stayed in her bed. She kept waiting for him to walk in the door and tell her how he had faked his death so that they could run away together. But that would never happen. She knew that it had been Fox that she’d buried that day. Not that she’d buried him. His body had been taken by the Republic.

She sat as she usually did now, alone in her chair with her datapad and Fox’s helmet in her lap. She had been permitted to take that much, and Thire, the new commanding officer of the Coruscant Guard, had later brought her his bracers. As she reviewed her notes, she ran her fingers across the plastoid, tracing the painted stripes or the exaggerated features.

A message chimed across the top of her datapad from Senator Organa. She opened it.

‘Are you with us?’

Maybe it was inappropriate for him to take advantage of her grief. When Bail had asked for her thoughts on the Empire before, she had turned him down- fearing retaliation. She wasn’t afraid anymore. Riyo clutched the helmet to her so hard as to dig the plastoid into her skin as she responded.

‘Yes’

Vader would pay.

[iflostreturntosteverogers]

No Longer

Characters: BuckyxReaderxSteve, Alexo (Male OC)

Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Violence, Implied Smut

A/N: Chapter Two of Blood On My Name is here! Beta’d by: @fictionalabyss

      Staring in the mirror, I smooth the silk of my gown once more. I calculate the different ways this plan can go, finding a solution to every problem, all except one. Me. Operation Longing gnaws at me, distracting me, stealing my breath with fear and anger. I’ve been their good, little doll. I’ve done their bidding over and over. I’ve done horrible things in my long life, but Operation Longing will not happen. I won’t kill them, and I won't let them be dragged into this Hydra hell. Not again. I’ll die first. Steeling my resolve, I leave the grand hotel room. One last take down. One last time being the butterfly of Hydra, of being Alexo’s plaything, of being the broken little girl stolen from her home, all because she fell in love. 

Brooklyn, January, 1941

      “Where are we going?” Bucky and Steve wanted to surprise me with something, and the anticipation was killing me. They were usually terrible at keeping secrets from me, but they kept this one locked up tight. “We’re almost there, doll.” Bucky chuckles at my dramatic sigh. “But if we keep walking, poor Stevie is going to have an asthma attack.” I giggle, earning myself a pinch on the behind. It feels so good to tease them and laugh, it makes tomorrow feel farther away. Bucky’s draft into the war turned our worlds’ upside down. He was putting on a brave face for Steve and I, but the facade was cracking with the leave date nipping at our heels. We couldn’t stop it, couldn’t find a way out of it, so we begrudgingly accepted the orders. The boys were determined for tonight to be something to remember, something for us all to hold onto during the war. We left the Modern Marvels Pavilion, after watching Howard Stark’s demonstration, the boys ready to get on with the night. We finally come to a stop, and Bucky pulls the blindfold off my eyes. We’re at the top of a grassy hill, overlooking the lights of the city. It’s beautiful, with the stars shining above us. It’s unusually warm for January in New York, but for that I’m grateful. I turn to tell the boys I love the view, but the words die on my lips when I see them both down on one knee. Two rings, two men I love deeply, it’s overwhelming and wonderful. I start shaking my head yes, tears escaping my eyes before either one can speak. I rush them both, pulling them into my arms. We fall to the ground, laughing and crying and hearts bursting with love. 

      “I’m coming home, my love. It’s going to be okay.” I try to stop the tears, but I can’t. Bucky crushes me to him, pulling Steve into the embrace as well. “This war will be over soon. I’ll be home, and we can really start our lives. Buy a house in the country, have a couple little rugrats, and we’ll all grow old and wrinkly together.” Bucky’s voice is cracking, thick with emotion. “I love you both so very much.” He releases me into Steve’s arms, blowing a kiss to us as he walks away. Steve can barely hold my weight up as I fall apart, sinking to the ground, silent sobs wracking my body. Steve and I return to the little apartment the three of us share. He puts me to bed, holding me until I cry myself to sleep. Stupid, sweet, never back down Steve returned to the recruiters for a fifth time.

      I stare at the body of the senator. The poor fool never stood a chance, at least I made his death quick. The family he married into, well, they would’ve prolonged the suffering of the cheating millionaire. I leave the hotel room after inspecting my dress and body for anything out of place, finding nothing. Distracted, I nearly miss them. Just coming off the elevator, Bucky and Steve turn towards me. Recognition dawns on Steve’s face and he starts to alert Bucky, before I disappear into the stairwell. I’m chanting a mantra of please don’t follow as I hurry down the stairs. I have to stop myself from running the whole way back to my hotel. Steve’s face had paled, eyes going wide like he was seeing a ghost, and maybe he was. 

      Alexo snores next to me. After “celebrating” a mission well done, he passed out. I can’t sleep. My heart is still pounding, aching for them. They were just within reach, and I had run, I wasn’t ready. I have to take care of the sleeping man next to me first, send a message to Hydra, that they don't own me anymore. I slip out of the bed, grabbing a robe to cover my naked body. Walking into the bathroom, I pull on a pair of jeans and a hoodie. I grab my hidden bag, opting to leave all but a couple outfits, some money, and all the intel I had. Alexo is awake when I exit the bathroom, I pull the gun from the back of my jeans. “Oh little butterfly, what do you think you’re doing?” His voice is confident but his eyes betray his fear. “I’m done.” I say plainly, before pulling the trigger. I hear his gurgling, his dying breaths, as the door closes and I run. 

��     I pace back and forth in the alley across from the Avengers tower. Operation Longing was supposed to be the end of the Winter Soldier and Captain America, instead it was the push I needed to break the chains, to take back my life. Taking a deep breath, I walk up to the door and into the lobby. “Ma’am, do you need something?” A lone security guard sits at a desk, eyeing me suspiciously. “Yes. I need to speak with Sergeant Barnes and Captain Rogers.” He makes a call. “Yes, sirs. I’m sorry to bother you, but there’s a young woman that says she needs to speak to you.” He covers the receiver, looking at me. “Ma’am, what’s your name?” “Y/N Y/L/N.” He repeats into the phone, his face paling at whatever he’s been told. The door to the stairwell bursts open a couple minutes later. Steve and Bucky tripping over themselves and coming to a stop ten feet away from me. Pale faces and wide eyes greet me. Bucky opens his mouth to speak and shuts it. I know the feeling, words are failing me too. Steve utters one word, “How?”

Tags: @sorenmarie87, @aactuaaltraash, @importanttyrantruler

[kittensjonsa]

Pull Me Closer

For @jonxsansafanfiction Valentine's Day: 6 Feb - Hearts. This was a hard theme for me so I tried my best. I love animals so I guess the hearts was a little tribute to them. Oh and the story is based on the hot dress Sophie Turner was wearing at the SAG awards so I thought OK let's combine the two. Lol. If only Kit was there. But that dress hot damn wow. Anyway thanks for reading. And keep the fics coming! ************* Jon peered out through the peephole and made sure the coast was clear before he slipped out of the hotel room. Running a hand through his curls to make sure not a strand was out of place and that his now crumpled shirt was tucked in properly. She was still on him, the scent of her pervaded every fibre of his being and even on his clothes. Laundry could wait a week or two. See you tonight love, he thought as he glanced back at the messed up duvet that hardly covered a shapely leg which stuck out from underneath it. Jon felt his loins stir as he recalled the last few hours from the night before in his mind. And more nights to come, he thought grinning to himself and reluctantly opened the door. ..... TWELVE HOURS EARLIER... The annual Wild @ Heart charity ball was an event Sansa and Arya were always looking forward to in attending. All of the North's high society and who's who were invited and the Starks were almost always on their guest list. Ned and Catelyn Stark's contributions and efforts in funding wildlife research and rehabilitating the endangered grey wolves back to their original habitats in the North, were one of the Stark's family's proudest accomplishments. From building a research centre to picking the best experts in the field to funding the various programmes, Ned and Cat were a force to be reckoned with. And they had imparted their compassion and passion to their children as well. Robb was determined to continue their legacy and placed his heart and soul into doing what his parents would have done for the foundation. So much so that the organisers had promised Robb Stark, now the head of the prominent Stark household, that they would be honouring the Stark family with the Passionate Hearts award that evening. It was an award that represented what Wild@Hearts Animal Sanctuary and Wildlife Research was truly about and it was the highest honour the organisation could give to anyone for their continuing support and dedication to caring and rescuing all wild creatures big and small. Sansa was delighted when Robb rallied the whole family to ready themselves for the gala. It was Sansa's third time in attendance but the preparation leading towards the evening always seem like the first time. From choosing the right dress and jewellery, getting the right make up and hair done was something Sansa could get used to. Sansa had her eye on an exquisite red gown she saw draped on a mannequin in the Louis Vuitton boutique while out having brunch with Margaery a month ago. Sansa knew that dress was the one. Even Arya agreed it was indeed meant for Sansa and she was keen to turn heads, maybe a popular fashion magazine to look her way . "What time is the limo picking us up?" Sansa yelled to Arya who was in the bathroom, checking her hair for the hundredth time. Arya stepped out and shrugged, her curled up bob looking the same as it did a few moments ago. Sansa sat still as the make up artist put the finishing touches to her face. Sansa glanced from the corner of her eye at the red gown hanging on the coat rack. Robb had been generous with their wardrobe this time, who finally saw how much his sisters revelled in social events such as this. "I don't know, Robb will text when it's here," Arya quipped, pursing her dark plum lips. Sansa gave a little smirk when Arya took her advice and tried something different this time and picked a simple Charlie Brear dusty pink 1920s style gown that showed off her athletic physique. What are sisters for, Sansa thought happily. After the accident that took Father and Mother and little Rickon away five years ago, the Stark siblings had grown closer than they had been before. Gone were the bratty squabbles and snide remarks. They only had each other now. Sansa got up to wear her dress when a knock came on the door. "We have another half hour, I hope to God you girls are ready," Robb's voice rang in from the other side. Sansa zipped up her dress and strapped on her shoes. Arya was already ready and texting on her phone. Looks like it was going to be family night out tonight, Sansa thought as she took one final look at the mirror. Bright red dress matched with a bright red lip, Sansa was confident she was going to get some attention tonight. Perhaps best dressed by Harper's Bazaar. She could dream. "All right. You ready? Let's do this." Sansa and Arya stood in front of the full length mirror of Sansa's room and looked at themselves. How much they had grown. It seemed like only yesterday they were wearing pigtails and shoes with untied laces and now, they were all dressed up glamourously for a ball. Arya smiled back at Sansa's reflection and both of them stepped out, geared up for perhaps the best night of the year. Sansa couldn't help but squeal slightly as she stepped in the grand ballroom of the Waldorf. The huge chandelier hanged elegantly high above the room, its crystals reflecting the warm light and bathing everything in a rich golden glow. Everyone looked beautiful, Sansa noticed. She could get used to this. As the Stark siblings were ushered to their tables, Sansa felt a light tug on her elbow. "You caught my eye, Sansa," a low raspy voice whispered from behind her. Sansa almost stopped breathing. Jon. Sansa turned and was greeted by a very dapper and broodingly handsome Jon Targaryen. Sansa's mouth nearly touched the floor. The velvet navy suit with the navy bow tie looked as if it belonged on him. The almost black curly hair that neatly framed his handsome face gave Sansa butterflies. "Jon.. Oh my God, so good to see you! My, my look at you, you cleaned up well." Sansa reached over to give Jon a hug. It had been years since she last saw him. Ever since the accident. Sansa lingered in his arms when she caught a whiff of Jon's wonderful scent. How she missed him. They had been childhood friends and practically grew up together. She remembered the many times Robb and Arya used to tease the both of them as if they were a couple. Sansa didn't understand why back then, but as she grew older and realised how close Jon and her were, they might as well have been. Till he moved away with his family and now, all grown up and groomed to be a Senator. Like his grandfather, Robb had always described Jon. "Not as good as you. My, that dress, you could stop a train in that." "Well, good thing I'm not then since I plan to drink all the champagne," Sansa giggled shyly, her cheeks pink from Jon's stare. "Not too much though, at least until after a dance with me," Jon smiled as he held out his hand to her. The night went wonderfully as expected, Robb managed to bring a tear out of everyone in the room with his heartfelt speech and Arya finally getting a chance to chat with the suave Gendry Baratheon. Even Bran was having a good time. But all she could focus on was Jon. Who had been constantly gazing at her with his dark eyes from the next table the moment she sat down. They had exchanged shy smiles and looks across the tables and Sansa could even feel his eyes on her when she left for the bathroom. She had to admit it felt good. How did she ever missed out on Jon? Too close for comfort, perhaps. But still, the thought of Jon with her was a tempting prospect. And one she had always thought for some time. The image in her mind never really left. Sansa felt a nice warm buzz from the four glasses of Vueve Cliqout she had downed and leaned on her chair as she watched everyone around her. She was sober still but felt relaxed. "Robb did a wonderful job with the speech. I'm sure your mom and dad would've been proud." Sansa heard Jon and turned to see him sitting beside her. Her table was empty as Arya was seated at Gendry's table and Bran and Robb were making rounds shaking hands with everybody who congratulated them. "He did and I'm sure they would be too." Sansa sighed and wished her mother and father could see how far they've come as a family. She missed them terribly. Especially little Rickon. He would love coming to places like these. Sansa took a deep breath when she felt a sob coming on. No, it's a happy night for all of us tonight, let's just enjoy it, Sansa thought. "You know, there's a little garden out back that I've always wanted to check out at night, thought maybe I could do with some company. If you don't mind, would you like to come join me for a walk, Sansa?" Sansa came back to herself as she heard Jon's invitation. She too had wondered how the rose garden of the Waldorf looked like at night. She looked around and it deemed upon her that perhaps a quick break from all the celebration would be nice. Sansa took Jon's offered hand and followed him out of the ball room. The summer night was a balmy one and the air was warm and filled with the scent of roses. Sansa loved it, it looked different at night, the roses bore a darker red, almost purple in the moonlight. "I have to say, I've always wanted to bring a date here." Jon chuckled as he admired the garden. "Oh, so were you successful?" Jon laughed at Sansa's cheeky remark. He missed that about her. "Well, you're here with me now, aren't you? So I say yes." "Free champagne and dinner. Well, you got a good deal." They both laughed at Sansa's comment. They've always shared a similar sense of humour. "I couldn't take my eyes off you the moment I saw you walk in Sansa. And I started to remember all the times we had together when we were kids. Do you still remember? " Sansa smiled. Of course she did. " Yes I do Jon. We had so much fun together. Those were good times, of course I remember." "Have you thought of me ever since? Because I often think of you, Sansa. And I was hoping to see you tonight." Sansa blushed. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or Jon that was making her warm and tingly inside. "And I was hoping I could talk to you about something that I've waited so long to tell you." Sansa head snapped towards Jon who was now inching closer to her. Sansa wasn't quite sure what was happening. "Sansa, I-I don't know how to tell you this but I'm just going to say it.. I love you. I've always been in love with you. Ever when we were kids, I knew I loved you. I understand if you don't feel the same, but I just wanted you to know. Before I.. Before it's too late to say it," Jon softly professed, his whispering breath on her giving her goosebumps as he spoke the words. Jon was now holding her arms and looking at her earnestly. "Oh." Sansa was stunned by Jon's admission. She wasn't dreaming, she had always wanted Jon to say that to her, ever since she realised she had developed feelings for him too but kept quiet, just like he did. Missing him was terrible when he had to move far away. The emails and calls didn't stop though they got much lesser and less frequent. Apparently, they were both afraid of speaking the truth when it was the only thing that mattered. " You could have told me sooner, Jon. I missed you terribly. I thought you didn't want me around anymore." "No, no... Oh my sweet Sansa, never. I wanted to stay but family duty got in the way. And I'm sorry it did. I've always wanted you to be with me. I wanted to tell you but I didn't want to lose you if I did. Because maybe you didn't feel the same way. " Sansa felt tears coming on. How long she had waited for those words to greet her ears. It was a song. " But you were wrong Jon. I did. I've always did." "Oh." Jon looked down and tried to compose himself. This was getting harder than how he had planned it to be. "Jon, I've always loved you. And you know what, I still do. I just wished you acted on it, instead of letting it be. I wondered for so long, Jon." It was Jon's turn now to tear up. How could he not know? He cherished her friendship and presence so much that he didn't dare to ruin it. It was a mistake to leave it and it plagued him ever since. "Oh Sansa, I was an idiot. I'm sorry. How can I make it up to you, for all the lost time?" Sansa's eyes searched his and wondered what she would do if this opportunity didn't present itself again. They were reunited again and there must be some cosmic reason for such things. Sansa wasn't a big believer in most things but the feelings bubbling up in her, told her there was something truly magical about what she and Jon had shared. And perhaps, they both were not going to let it pass and lose it again. "Well, pull me closer, Jon and we'll find out."