#i wrote this in mid may so im excited to see where were at by the time this posts lmao | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arcadejohn127-9 · 3 years

Note

Hello,, may i request headcanons of the brothers who got a love letter from mc but it turned out to be a prank from some lesser demons,,thank you :))

This was meant to be posted on yesterday for April fools but ended up getting caught up with things irl and didn't get to finish it in time - aaaaaaaand I fell asleep before midnight and now it's 3 am, fell asleep mid way through writing, well done me 😭😂

Rip the lesser demons for always having the balls to cause mischief but always end up getting hurt, when will they learn - what happens at the end is up to you

The lesser demon snickered towards his friend, shushing their friend as they slipped the pink letter into the higher demons locker. Another demon was with them, more timid than the other two.

"what if we get in trouble?! They'll find out it wasn't actually the human and we'll end up dog food-!"

"we planned this whole thing, it'll be fun - we just gotta stay at a distance!"

It was long before footsteps grew closer, the timid demon squeaking in fear. The other lesser demons took it as a sign to start running, grabbing each other and bolted away from the scene of the crime.

The owner of the locker arrived, just noticing the lesser demons run off in the distance. He opened his locker and almost stumbled back when a letter fluttered out. The demon grew curious he noticed there was a heart seal on the back. He opened it to read it to himself.

To my dearest friend,

I think it's about time I come clean about my feelings, I've been holding these in for a very long time and I refuse to keep them a secret anymore!

I'm in love with you! I can't explain it but you've won my heart, everytime you smile at me I just can't help but feel my heart skip. Is it wrong to feel this way? I'm only a human and you are a demon...we're so different and I don't know how long we'll be able to have this time we have together. All I know is that I want to be with you for as long as I can!

Will you accept my feelings? I'm not sure if I can face just yet so meet me at the end of day! I'll be waiting for you at the back of the school - I really hope you come. Even if it's decline my feelings....I just want to be able to face you and how you make me feel.

Love, (Y/N)

Lucifer:

Oh his ego is SO stroked

He could just imagine the human blushing as they wrote and nervously putting it in his locker

He did see you later that day and decided to tease you a little but while you were flustered, you also seemed confused

That was his first suspicion

When the time finally came he was patient but you weren't early

His second suspicious

You both knew each other very well, he liked things being in a timely Matter and you tried your best to not be late

He stiffened when he heard a snicker from a few trees away, he looked over there to see three demons all hiding

"I know you're hiding, it's best you come out now."

One by one they all showed themselves, growing nervous

"Come here, don't be shy, I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for this, after all you seemed to be desperate to have me out here."

"you- you knew it wasn't the human?!"

his pride wouldn't let him tell the truth, he refused to show his disappointment

"of course, you clearly don't understand the human as much as you think you do - now, who's the leader? I think we should have a nice talk."

Mammon:

YOU GAVE HIM A LOVE LETTER??!!!

He's internally screaming, his face was bright red

Watch this boy struggle against his locker as he tries to hide his excitement

Though, when his high died down he did find it strange you were being shy

You could have your shy moments but to confess through a letter was odd

He wasn't the brightest guy around but he can sense when he's getting scammed - even if he ignores that instinct when it comes to money

He's always around you so it wasn't strange for him to see you after class and he was surprised how... relaxed you were

Something was up but in the end, he went to the back of the school

When he texted you, asking you where you were and you said going home - that was the final straw

HE WAS TRICKED!

"Oi! Are you out there?! I know you tricked me!"

The lesser demons started to panic, not thinking mammon would catch on

But when mammon started marching around looking for them they decided it was best to reveal themselves

"There ya are, now let's get to talking - what made you three wanna do something like this? You think it's funny to pretend to be the human?"

The leader snickered, agreeing that it was funny to pretend but their friends understood right now - their doom was coming

Mammon cracked his knuckles, stalking closest to them

"I like a good joke, let me show you my favourite one."

Levithan:

Love Letter in his locker??? Heart seal!!!??HE WAS THE LOVE INTEREST??!!

He's torn between dying inside and excitement, he's absolutely losing it

He had to fan himself with the letter due to how hot his face was getting

He wasn't sure how he was going to face you! Let alone you having to face him

But- there was no way you were interested in him! You wouldn't do this

He didn't believe it, it HAD to be a prank

When levi saw you for the rest of the day it only strengthen his suspicions

He did go to the back of the school and when he saw you were no where to he seen

He was absolutely embarassed and ashamed by even hoping it was real

"YOU CAN COME OUT NOW! just- just stop hiding, it isn't funny."

the demons came out, disappointed with the lack of dramatics

"so you three did it, you really think it's funny to do something like this?! To mess with someone's feelings and pretend to be the human is just - IT'S PATHETIC-!"

The demons started to feel uncomfortable, the higher demon had tears in his eyes and obviously worked up

Even the one who wanted to see this kind of reaction was uncomfortable

His demon form started to shift outwards and raised his hand, the ground beneath them rumbling

"it seems you just think I'm some sort of pushover! But I'm not!"

Satan:

Hm, how interesting

It isn't too odd that you're using a letter to confess, you know he appreciate writing

But you were more verbal or atleast text - this was new

But to say he wasn't absolutely ecstatic was an understatement, he was beyond the moon

When he saw you later he tried to not bring up the letter as his brothers were around

Though, he was thrown off when you got confused when he teased about seeing you after school

He decided he'll investigate things, going up to demons who have lockers near his and ask if he saw the human put anything in it

After awhile of searching he finally found out it was three demons who did it - he didn't want to spoil their fun and so he still went

He leaned against the nearest tree, waiting for the demons to arrive

"Ah you're here, I'm so glad you finally came."

the demons were surprised when he moved towards them, they left their hiding spot with nervous smiles

"You write well, you got their energy almost perfectly into the letter - I'm impressed."

They didn't expect that....not one bit

"you're not....mad???"

Satan chuckled, flexing his clenched fists

His smile grew more strained and dangerous as he leaned over them

"oh no, no I'm not mad - im LIVID."

Asmodeus:

He was surprised to get a love letter, he gets piles worth everyday

He didn't expect it to be from YOU though

You were so open with him and you two were already overly affectionate to each other he was sure you were already low-key dating

So to get confirmation his feelings were returned - he was overjoyed!

As soon as he saw you he's hugging you, telling you how he loved your letter and that he'll still meet you after school if you need to

You were utterly confused and unsure what he was talking about

When you told him you didn't give him that letter he felt his heart break

You didn't love him?? That wasn't your letter??

To think someone would play a prank on him like that! It was rude!

When it was time, he went to the back of the school and pretended as if he didn't sense the other demons

That was until he grew impatient

"are you shy, dear? It's okay - I know it wasn't the human~"

The lesser demons came out, confused

One of them blushed just being near him

"I'm sorry for my friend! They wanted to play the prank but- but I love you asmo!"

He gave them a pity smile

"aww~ of course you love me! But you really hurt my feelings making me believe the human did, I almost cried!"

The demons immediately all felt bad

The idea of their gorgeous asmo crying made them guilty

"I know exactly what will make me feel better, making sure you three can never write again~! Can't have you keep tricking me, can I?"

Beezlebub:

A Love letter from you?! He's a happy boy

But now that he actually thinks about it - it's odd you're not being upfront

You two usually sit alone together when you wanna get something off your chest, holding hands and you don't even have to face each other

Why the sudden change? Perhaps you just wanted to be like one of Levi's anime characters

Regardless, he was happy and wanted you to be happy

Hes was going to make you happy!

Beel was quick to find you and act like he didn't find your letter, you said you'll face him after school and he respected that

Whilst you couldn't exactly avoid each other before then, he did try to give you space

As soon as school ended he Went to the back, waiting for you to arrive

Each second went by and he grew more hungry

He smelt something close by and found three demons hiding, it was odd but he didn't want to be hungry whilst you confessed - he wanted to give you his full focus

"ah-! How did you know we were here?!"

"I smelt the sandwich in your bag, I want it."

It didn't take much convincing to hand it over

He's a scary demon afterall

"it's best you leave, my friend is coming."

One of the demons started laughing, questioning if he actually believed it was you who gave him the letter

Beel got confused before it all clicked together, he frowned, glaring at the demons

He wasn't happy

"I'm still hungry, three demons will do just fine."

Belphegor:

Happy cow man, demon tail go SWISH

On the inside hes like an excited dog, outside he's just standing there

Meanwhile he wants to be like his twin, respectful that you want to do later

He isn't that patient and wants to make it official with you NOW

so as soon as he sees you, he's draping himself on you and telling you how impatient he is

You're confused on why and he shows you the love letter

You tell him that it isn't from you and that's not even your hand writing - it's a good mimic but not yours

He is SHOCKED then he's mad

He still goes to the back of the school but it's to fight whoever pranked him

He wasn't going to wait around

"Get out now or I'll search this entire space for you - it won't be pretty if I find out."

It didn't take the demons twice to show themselves

Belphegor was feared amongst others due to his brutality when push comes to shove

Just because he's always sleeping doesn't mean he isn't scary

"Good~ so which one of you wrote the letter? If you wanted to confess you should of just done it."

The demons looked at each other, unsure on what to do

But after a few moments the youngest brother got impatient, moving towards them with a clenched hand

The leader of the lesser demons finally admitted to doing the prank

"see? It wasn't so hard, let's have a long chat about this~"

#obey me #obey me shall we date #gamingclubpresident #aracadejohn217 9 #obey me mammon #obey me mc #obey me asmodeus #obey me satan #obey me belphegor #obey me beezlebub #obey me leviathan #obey me luficer #obey me imagine #obey me headcanon #obey me headcanons #obey me x mc #obey me x you #obey me x reader

468 notes · View notes

jiilys · 3 years

Note

would u help me out for a second. im in the mood to write for the first time, and i think your style is beautiful. sitting down n actually trying though, im stuck as fuck! i’m realizing that in your dialogue/scenes you’ve got a lot of Little Things. little tiny elements that are subtle & just enough. how are you deciding that lily is building a house of cards at the moment or sirius is sitting in a tree or whatever during a given scene? how do you come up with those ideas for dialogue that are so silly & real & sneakily tender? do you know where it’s going when you begin? any advice for just… starting something?

ps: i appreciate you. you make it look easy & that’s very very cool

This is a lovely question!! Sorry it took me so long to get to it, I didn’t want to get it wrong. Also I’ve included some examples to try and explain what I mean in practise, but it also comes off rather like plugging. tragically this is unavoidable. Anyway, all that being said I have no idea how to advise you about dialogue and coming up with it, I think just listening to people talk helps. Don’t forget contractions, and when in doubt always trust the reader to keep up, real people don’t say perfect or even grammatically correct sentences a lot of the time. We also cut each other off all the time, especially when we’re trying to be funny. Like, here’s an example from warm front:

“He’s not even two. He probably would have thought it was, like, having a lie down or something.”

Harry was laughing now, “A lie down?”

“Yeah, a spontaneous, truck-induced–“

“–Permanent–“ “

–Permanent, lie-down. I’m almost jealous now actually.”

Another thing, but people say um and like or can't speak or cut themselves off, especially when they’re nervous. James when Lily says she loves him for the first time: ‘“Wow,” He breathed, “I’m– wow.” He put both hands on her cheeks and kissed her crazy, abruptly, dumbly. Her head spun.’ He can’t even speak! Dumb boy.

I think natural dialogue sometimes just requires you to read it aloud, which is very embarrassing but ultimately quite useful in trying to figure out whether something sounds normal or not. Use casual words, and try not to go dictionary hunting: if you cant think of the word chances are your character can’t either

In terms of concepts I have no idea, but I do have a few tips. I write all my short one-shots in one document (its called ‘just bad’ lmao) so its easy to start something, write a few lines, and then if it doesnt work just start a new concept, but still have all the old stuff handy. if you feel like you’ve written yourself into a corner its probably because you took a wrong turn earlier, so its just a matter of going back up and figuring out where you turned onto the dead end, or where a line could be funnier and/or sadder and/or more meaningful. Sometimes the bare bones of a decent line is there but you have to work it a little.

In this harry/ginny thing where harry is apologising for all the attention and ginny brushes him off she says:

“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”

The response went through a few drafts, all variations on the same thing:

(1) “You’re funnier.” [too short, doesn’t make sense, and not really that funny. unholy trinity]

(2) “You make it funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, “It’s not– you make it like that.” [this could work! I have no idea why I cut this, I think I forgot abt it lmao]

(3) “You’re the funniest person I know, Harry said, sincerely, and Ginny felt her heartbeat all through her, “You make it funny.” [jumping from ‘its more funny than annoying’ to getting this sincere out of nowhere is a little much, even for harry who is famously whipped]

I ended up going with this:

“It’s nothing,” her voice, all force, “Anyway, it’s more funny than annoying.”

“You’re funny.” Harry said, looking at her for real, flustered, “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”

It follows the flow of the conversation and I think the way he says it, ‘you’re funny’ like its obvious, and then being like oh fuck and over-explaining it stumbling a little “I mean– you make it funny. That’s all you.”. You know when you like someone and you say something that gives you away before you can stop yourself? I wanted it to sound like that. Just gotta keep in mind how people behave, we are so stupid a lot of the time, we give ourselves away.

The thing about short stuff i find is implying a lot of history without actually describing a lot of it. I normally do this by having memories come up as almost shards, one second of feeling. You know when you’re in a conversation with someone and they mention someone or a past event, and it rises to the top of your brain, but only for a second? i find sometimes when you’re reading stuff people will try and replay entire memories or events mid-conversation, which is not something you do when you think. You don’t need to replay it beat by beat, you were there! This sounds vague as hell so I’ll try and show you what I mean:

From good crimes: “Petunia is engaged.” Lily’s voice, raw and wrong, “To Vernon. Eliza Hunt told me at the supermarket.” Sudden flashes of Petunia, the only time he’d ever met her, sat in the back of Lily’s twenty-first, pinched and whispering. “Whose Eliza Hunt?” This seems as good a thing to say as any.

pretty on the nose (the phrase ‘sudden flashes’ is pretty so i'll allow it from past me). But see how you don’t need to know how Petunia didnt talk to anyone, how she left early, how she was the odd one out: you don’t need to read all that, you already know because she was sat in the back and because pinched is such a mean verb, spiteful and sharp, you can already imagine how the evening went without me saying so

From my proposal take, after Sirius finds out they’re engaged: Sirius’ grip on his shoulder tightened for one second, still grinning, and James knew what he meant. “I know.” He said, because only Sirius had been there for all of it, when they were fifteen, drunk on Firewhiskey for the first time and James had said I think I’ve fucked it, I think I’ve fucked it but I like her for real.

you don’t need a description of the whole night, what party they were at, who they were with, what they were talking about: the important bit is that Sirius was the first person he told, and that they’re both remembering that at the same moment because they’re soulmates lmao. You know when something big happens for a friend and you feel so full of pride & love that you feel like you’ll burst into confetti?? this needed to feel like that, and you only need a flash for it

I feel like I’ve sort of strayed off from what you asked me, which is really advice on how to start something. I normally start with a line, usually of dialogue, and then try and build from there because dialogue is my thing. You might have a different thing! Some people write from concepts or locations, or an image. i might start with one or a few lines of dialogue, write them down, and then try to build from there. For example for the proposal thing I started from james just saying “Marry me”, which I find more romantic than ‘will you marry me’, purely because it sounds like he simply couldn’t stop himself from saying it, like it rushed out. Another example, this thing started from just “don’t be mad at me” “okay” James agreed instantly, because he is such a sucker for her.

When I write I don’t normally know where I’m going! I normally set out to write something I think is vaguely funny and evokes An Emotion, and then I just play around with stuff until I get there. when I write certain stuff and I have scenes in mind, stuff I want to happen, but I find that if I try to plot it to tightly its not exciting to work on, because sometimes you write a good line by accident, that you hadn’t thought of when you sat down, and you surprise yourself. That is a really nice feeling! i want to maximise that feeling.

'What I mostly try to remember is that writing something down, anything down, is useful. Sometimes you write for a whole night and dont get anything useable, but its like clearing pipes. Sometimes you have to flush through shit to get to the good bits. All the rough stuff, the things you don’t like or didn’t work, you wrote to get you to the stuff that did work. All of the bad shit got you here! It wasn’t a waste, you were working to find the good thing

If I had any tips its just the usual stuff, read! It is annoying how much that helps. Also, and I know this may make you shudder, but reading poetry is useful just because in no other literary or media form is language so important. In comics you have pictures, in novels you have plot and character, in film you all that and cinematography, but in poetry you live and die by how good the words are. If you want recs here’s my poem roundup tag, that I do sometimes, or if you want something just now read this by Anne Carson, which uses words like ‘smashing’, ‘boatwash’, and ‘green’ in the best way possible. Also it has these lines: “Recently having learned to recognize the type of tree called sycamore, / I see them in any forest— / the ones that look harrowed, / in shreds, but / go also / straight up into life,”

I mean, think of a sharper image than that?? It’s not possible. Just try remember to stay true to your characters and that in real life, the little stuff is the big stuff. Little things the people around you do normally show they care more than big speeches, and if you want to show love that’s how to make it feel lived in. You want to build a world! the little stuff is usually the world. Take some from your own or dream the ones you wish you had.

This truly was a very kind message and I’m so grateful you like my stuff, I hope any of this was even half-useful, although now reading it back it is borderline nonsensical. I’m going to bed now, good luck with the writing, and don’t forget to send it to me!!

caro xoxo

#writing bitching #said it already but loved this message it was so thoughtful. seemed pretty articulate to me i think ur writing is gunna be just fine!!!#rooting for you & anyone trying to write something rn. words suck and are difficult! they are also better than drugs & sex. regretable #kindnesses

72 notes · View notes

walkwithheroes84 · 3 years

Text

Rest of 2021 Watch List

With only six and a half months left of 2021, it’s time to get serious about my drama watching habits. I’m so behind and there are several things that are (supposed to be) coming out in the later part of the year. So, here is my list of things that I want to start/am interested in. Granted, some of these things may change as more information comes out about them. Or I may just decide not to watch them. And some may get pushed back into 2022.

Already Aired:

Lucifer: season 5b (USA) - Though the first half of season five left us on a cliffhanger, I just cannot seem to sit myself down to finish out the season. It may be the mixed reactions of long time fans or the knowledge that season six is the last, either way, I’m having a hard time getting back into the show.

Youth of May: (South Korea) - This romantic, moody, slice-of-life drama. I was waiting for it.The ending is going to break my heart, so I have to be ready for it. I hear the preformances are amazing, but I know I’ll be crying.

Word of Honor: (China) - Everything I’ve heard about this drama makes it sound amazing. And while I know things will be heartbreaking - I just need to prepare.

Currently Airing:

Doom at Your Service: (South Korea) - I watched the first four episodes (I think?), but I am waiting to binge it after it ends. Why? The first few episodes were so good, I want to be able to watch it all at once.

The Penthouse: War in Life, Season 3: (South Korea) - I was super excited for this one...then I heard about Logan’s “brother” and, uh...maybe I’ll just watch the clips of my favorites?

Mad for Each Other: (South Korea) - I know very little about this drama, but it looks amazing and I’m hearing good things.

Mine: (South Korea) - So, it sounds like two daughter-in-laws of a rich family work together to get what they want. It looks good.

My Roomate is a Gumiho: (South Korea) - It just looks fluffy and adorable. And I need that.

Coming Soon:

June:

Ancient Love Poetry: (China) - It just sounds sweet and sad and I love a good Chinese drama that will make me smile and eat up the angst.

Nevertheless: (South Korea) - Honestly? The Netflix trailer looked interesting.

July:

The New Version of the Condor Heroes: (China) - I love this story and the 2014 one was a hotmess. The promo pictures look good, though they were released in 2018. Rumor is the drama has been shelved, but we’ll see what happens.

The Devil Judge: (South Korea) - You have Ji Sung staring in a dystopian drama, where he is the as the head judge of the highest court in the land. The court has become a TV reality show, with viewers invited to participate in a live. The one person looking to take him down is Kim Min Jung as the director of a corporate social responsibility foundation. And then you have two childhood friends: Park Jin Young and Park Gyu Young, idealist who want to make their world better. I look forward to Ji Sung and Kim Min Jung battling it out, and maybe corrupting the idealist cop and younger judge.

Boku no Satsui ga Koi wo Shita: (Japan) - This one may not ever get English subtitles, as Japanese dramas aren’t really subbed anymore...however, the story sounds amazing. A young man finds out his dead foster-father was a professional killer and this young man decides to take up the “family business” to avenge for the father. The young man approaches a womanwho is his assassination target. Despite his skill as a hitman, he can’t ever kill her, not matter how hard he tries. Instead, he ends up protecting her and the two fall in love. This could go so many places and I want to see it.

August:

Red Sky: (South Korea) - A beautiful and genius painter meets a blind officer in charge of astronomy, geography, art of divination, and meteorology. The two fall in love. And it’s marked as a “historical romantic fantasy”? Yes, please!

October:

The Red-Stained Sleeve Cuff: (South Korea) - The story of Sung Deok Im, a court lady. She catches the eye of Crown Prince Lee San. Once the prince becomes king, he wants Sung Deok Im to become his concubine, but she refuses. Yet, Sung Deok Im becomes the concubine of King Jeongjo. This could be angsty. Also, it stars Lee Jun Ho (who you may remember from Just Between Lovers) and Lee Se Young (who always brings it).

December: (or 2022...?)

Twenty-Five Twenty-One (South Korea) - The love story of two people, who have really bad-timing, told over the period of four years. Personally, I’m hoping for a poignant human drama ala Just Between Lovers or Come And Hug Me. (Minus death and murders),

Return: (South Korea) - This is literally described as: “A fantasy drama about the stories of young magicians who deal with heavenly spirits.” It will be on tvN, which usually has really solid dramas. There is a cast of talented up-and-comers: Lee Jae Wook, Arin, Park Hae Eun, and Hwang Min Hyun. There are also some talented vets in the cast: Yoo Joon Sang, Oh Na Ra, and Joo Sang Wook. It’s beingdirected by Park Joon Hwa Everything looks great on paper. It’s just - the drama will be written by the Hong Sisters. During my early days of Kdrama viewing (way back in the mid 2010s), these ladies wrote some of my favorites. And while I did love Hotel de Luna and A Korean Odyssey - it has become very clear over the years that these writers don’t do well during the second halves of their dramas and they aren’t always great at endings.

Snowdrop (South Korea) - It takes place in 1987, and follows students at a prestigious university in Seoul. It will be written by Yoo Hyun Mi, who wrote SKY Castle and The Bridal Mask. I’m looking forward to it, even though I heard there was pushback (which has resulted in the show airdate being moved back a couple of times) from the South Korean citizens' who believe that the drama distorts facts related to the pro-democracy movement of the 1980s in favour of the authoritarian regime. This was based on an incomplete version of the plotline that had been leaked online, which describes one character as a “spy” and another lead as working for the NSP. We’ll see

At Some Point in 2021/early 2022...?:

The Witcher, Season Two

The Umbrelllla Academy, Season Three

The Boys, Season Three

34 notes · View notes

moonlit-imagines · 4 years

Text

Headcanons for being a younger Avenger and mentoring Kamala

Kamala Khan x reader

warnings: avengers game spoilers, guns

a/n: so excited about this one; i made y/n just a bit older (and gn!) so that they’re in their mid-early teens during a-day! hope thats okie doke! reader has electrokinesis. this accidentally got really detailed

prompt: anonymous: “Hey there! Would you mind writing HCs for the Avengers Game about female reader being a young Avenger (around 17) and mentoring Kamala Khan?”

you were just a kid yourself when you joined the avengers

and you were an inspiration to kids around the world

“does SHIELD think nothing of child labor laws?” -bruce

the avengers became your family

and seeing what you could do...they knew you could handle yourself

and then a-day happened

the day started off so perfect

and the kids went ballistic over seeing you

“y/h/n! look, it’s y/h/n!”

“can i get a picture?”

“hi, guys! of course you can!”

but there was one kid who stuck out among the rest

kamala khan

“you’re the one who wrote about the sewers, right? i freaking loved it! may i just say your art is amazing?”

“r-really?”

“oh, yeah! and the part where you had thor spin mjölnir to push water towards the sewer lizards so i could shock them? genius!”

she could not wait to tell abu about what you had just said

you obviously took a selfie with her and handed her a little pin with your own “icon” on it

but your world got turned upside down that day

the battle was one you’d never forget

and the fighting with your own teammates afterwards would haunt you for years to come

“what do you know, y/n?! you’re just a kid!” -tony

“oh yeah? im one of the only functioning members of this team!”

“everybody calm down. y/n makes a good point, but—” -nat

“thank you”

“...but there’s some stuff you should leave up to us. you really shouldn’t have to take on so much responsibility” -nat

“she’s right, y/n. this was our fault” -bruce

“are you kidding me?! i’m just as guilty as the rest of you, i’m an equal member of this team! for years we’ve dealt with this together, taken the blame together! what’s changed?”

“y/n...you saw what we did out there. that changed everything...” -bruce

you technically were an inhuman, just not terrigen-based

didnt matter to AIM, they took dr. pym for god’s sake

so you had to run, you were on your own for a while

a long while

you laid low for five years, most boring five years of your life

at least you still had your life, though. it just wasn’t what it used to be

but you got a message one day

“‘tiny dancer,’ huh? my moneys on either nat or tony. nah, tony would have chosen ‘rocket man.’”

you couldn’t be sure, maybe it was just a random shield agent...maybe hank pym? god, this was crazy

the message brought you to, uh, cap’s memorial statue

and there was a young girl arguing with a couple of boys...an inhuman!

you hopped in and saved her, she seemed scared

“hey, kid, you alright?”

“y/h/n? is it really you?”

she seemed vaguely familiar

“are you tiny dancer?”

“no, i thought you might be? they sent you here, too?”

there wasn’t much time to chat, AIM was onto you

you two unfortunately got split up for a minute, but you were practically raised by the notorious clint barton and natasha romanoff, and various other spies

yes, you planted a tracker on her

and met her at the bus stop!

“you found me?”

“that i did, kamala. see, i do remember you”

“that is so cool! i mean—not almost getting killed, or the guy with the big head...”

“what guy? you need to tell me everything”

the whole busride was a bit overwhelming. kamala explained the resistance clues, her powers, her undying admiration for the avengers, you name it

but it made you feel good to know that there were people out there that didn’t hate you

“so what was it like? being the teenage avenger?”

“uh, it was...it was really cool. i felt like i was one-of-a-kind. but sometimes people didn’t take me seriously, it was kind of aggravating”

“yeah, no one takes me seriously either...”

“you know, depending on how this all goes, i might be able to give you a few pointers”

“really?! that’d be great!”

once you got to utah...you saw the chimera

it brought back some bad memories, kamala could tell

“you okay?”

“me? yeah, im good. just thinking...okay, well, do you have a plan on how to get yourself across all of this?”

“actually, i do!”

it was kind of creepy in there, but when you laid your eyes on caps shield, you kind of broke

“do you hear something, what it that?”

“...hulk. kamala, you need to get out of here, i’ll catch up to you, i swear”

she didn’t leave in time, so she got to see the greener side of bruce. you chased him back and tried to get bruce back

meanwhile, kamala found AIM troops...oops

bruce cooled off and man was he doing rough

“y/n, is that really you?”

“yeah, its me. surprise. how long have you been the big guy?”

“too long...a few years”

“jesus, im sorry. i’ll be right back, though. some kid brought me here, i gotta go get her. you kinda scared her off”

she was passed out when you got to her

but bruce is a doctor, he’d figure it out

“i could give her a little shock to wake her up, you know?”

“oh, i know. just let her rest for a minute. she needs it”

“right...well im gonna take a look around, maybe go see what i left behind. i could power the place up, but we’re missing some parts to actually get this thing running. best i can do is lights and doors”

you turned the little things on and turns out did leave a decent amount of stuff in here

your first pair of pistols that nat gave you, the gigantic stein that thor gifted you for your 13th birthday, gadgets tony needed an “extra boost” for *bzzt*, a note from cap that just said “good luck, y/n, you’re going to do great!” you cant even remember what it was he was referring to. you just missed him

kamala walked in while you were shuffling around and cleaning the place up

“hey, dr. banner wanted me to come get you. is this your room?”

“that it is, and it’s a huge mess. this is literally all my belongings ever”

bruce had his plan and you just went along, helping kamala out as you go

“baby steps, kam, don’t want you to pass out. but don’t worry, happens to the best of us” -you

“really? you pass out too?” -kamala

“oh yeah, for sure. tell her bruce, remember that time we had thor overcharge me to literally make me an EMP? and tony was busy listening to music so he wouldn’t get out of the blast radius and his armor shut down? so he was out of commission and i had just collapsed from it all? good times”

“y/n, we thought you died” -bruce

this hc is so long omg — anyways you guys ended up finding tony and it was sort of entertaining but he kinda punched bruce and then hugged you

“you got so big”

“shut up, tony”

you kinda harbored some bad feelings since none of the avengers did anything to help you once they started rounding up inhumans (but you still missed them)

getting attacked again

“okay, kamala, remember what i said about baby steps. dont overdo it. i trust you with this!”

“thank you, y/n! uh—oh my god!”

aaaanyways you went to the ant hill to see hank and pick up some supplies, boy was it great to see some familiar faces, then back the the chimera you went to fix it all up

“can you hold that right there for me, kamala? thanks. i think that just about does it. now i have a surprise for you...your own room!”

you helped kamala get it nice and tidy while talking about each other’s lives, she really did remind you of yourself when you became an avenger. excited, scared, underestimated, all of that. and she begged you to share some mission stories, so you obviously did

“you know, if you stick around for a while, you’re gonna have some cool stories, too. maybe even a kickass costume.”

“oh! a costume, ive got that sorta covered. check it out. a burkini, muslim women wear it for swimming and stuff. my mom got it for me”

“love it. soon we’ll find you a fitting name and update the suit, but seriously, this was the perfect way to go. you look great”

“you think so? i don’t know if i feel that cool. maybe i should try something else?”

“if that’s how you feel, you don’t have to stick to it. you can experiment all you want! but i really think you did awesome on this. come on, pose with me! and hey, i like your pins.”

at this point, you’d do anything for kamala, she reminded you so much of yourself. you would have killed for a mentor your age back in the day.

natasha was in fact tiny dancer...called it

“oh, god, y/n. you’re all grown up...im sorry we left you alone. but if it makes you feel better, i always kept an eye on you”

“well, i kind of took on a protégé...she’s like your grand-protégé. kam, c’mere”

after thor finally came back, everyone started fighting again and ditched, it felt so familiar. but you couldn’t leave kamala behind, you swore to yourself that you couldn’t do that.

she was so good for this team

MODOK was defeated (by kamala herself) but there was so much left to do, tons of threats to extinguish, training to accomplish

“y/n, tony won’t turn his dad rock off! he overrode the speakers in my room”

“oh, it’s on. get chastity’s fabric dye and bleach pens. we’re gonna start some trouble”

she gave you a high five one time and nearly broke your arm

sending each other tiny hand memes

“hey, ms. m, how’re your parents? doing okay without their favorite super-daughter?”

“my abu doesn’t stop texting me actually, says my family is super proud of me. it’s a nice change of pace”

you take her on covert missions for field training, it was Educational(tm)

*elevator music playing* “so...what do you want for dinner? i was thinking we could ask thor to barbecue”

sleepovers in her room that just turn into her showing you her superhero merch, listening to music, prank lists, sneaking off to the HARM room for hand-to-hand combat training and power experiments, thinking up new costume designs

“tip: you always need backup suits, you never know what you’re gonna run into out there. one time tony pushed me into a tower of paint cans and they spilled all over me. steve yelled at him for two hours afterwards. worst mission ever, except steve said ‘motherfucker’ and i have never recovered from the emotions of that day”

“wow, i wish i could have been there for that”

“don’t worry, kami, you’ll see some crazy ‘team bonding’ along the way”

she geeks out about captain marvel sometimes

“hey, i’ve got a book carol gave to me about ‘teens taking responsibility.’ you wanna read it?”

“is it any good?”

“i don’t know, i only read the first two pages”

you ended up having a true heart-to-heart with her after one mission when she made a mistake that nearly cost you guys the mission. you told her that not every mission is going to go perfect, each avenger had slipped up in the field, and she had just started, shes not going to be perfect

“i am literally always here if you need anything. i know what it feels like to be a teenager among legends, but trust me, you’ve made it this far and you’ve proven how much of a badass you are. i know you can take anything that gets thrown at you”

kamala said she makes vegan nachos and yeah she makes vegan nachos

you guys have to hide from the rest of the team when she makes them bc they eat ALL OF THEM

gaff (the SHEILD vendor) has you test his gear, you recommend gear to kamala

you were so excited to guide kamala on her journey of heroism

taglist: @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm //

#kamala khan #kamala khan x reader #kamala khan imagine #ms marvel #ms marvel x reader #ms marvel imagine #avengers #avengers x reader #avengers imagine #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #avengers game #avengers game x reader #avengers game imagine

176 notes · View notes

crqstalite · 5 years

Text

pt. 1, unforseen (felix && naji)

this turned out so much worse than i wanted it to.

i was actually kind of worried to write this chapter because while i did have the headcanon that force-sensitives could sense their children’s presences even before they were born, but by the time i wrote this chapter i was so absolutely done with trying to characterize the crew right that i just gave up. ;-;

also like?? there are no felix fanfictions anywhere n im so disappointed. even compared to like, torian, felix has like, none. so i guess i gotta write em’ all lol.

enjoy if you can. it does get pretty depressing near the end though :/

written: 7.28.19. word count: 2,686

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

character song: imagine, ariana grande

character file: naji iresso, barsen'thor, felix iresso, lieutenant

there’s another presence on the ship.

she feels it washing over her, whether she’s meditating or relaxing alone in her quarters. it’s there, it’s warm and beautiful. it’s much like felix’s, like the sunshine on voss, with a bit of a cooler tinge. but it wraps over her like a blanket or a hug, which is comforting in the dark nights aboard the defender.

while it is wonderful, naji is beginning to think there’s an intruder on the ship who’s really, really good at hide and seek. naji has hunted every single corner of the ship, even getting her husband and other crew members involved, but she can not find it. whatever is causing the extra presence, is either invisible or very, very small.

nadia mentions that she doesn’t sense it when she’s alone, only when she was around. and naji trusts she does meditate on her own, which she finds odd. she can’t ask any one else, because no one else on the ship is force sensitive in the slightest. thank god it’s not a cold aura, because naji may have had to fight herself (preferably with a blanket) to ward it off.

she’s reading a holonovel when she hears her name being called from outside her door. it’s…holiday? for a moment, naji forgets she was given access to the ship, and often appeared wherever she pleased except for their quarters. it was a tough week or so before she buckled and allowed tharan to install sensors in the defender for her to appear where she chose. there was one event in particular that lead to naji and felix making a rule that holiday wasn’t allowed to enter unless they gave her explicit permission, one she’d rather not remember right then.

“i’m alone, you can come inside, holiday.” she says softly.

holiday’s slim pink frame shimmers into view as she smiles to the jedi. naji isn’t very good at reading the hologram’s emotions, but she has a mischevous grin that reminds her of tharan’s when he has some sort of new project he’s working on. she’s up to no good, and she refocuses on her reading. “jedi, i may have found the answer to your…‘force presence’ issue!”

her capacity for not only sentience but a real voice box is amazing as she shrills the last part of her sentence (she didn’t ever tell tharan that, his ego would inflate further than the ship could handle, but she was in awe of his work). “is it a good thing?” she asks, as she continues skimming the holonovel. she’d read this one before, a published diary by an old war hero, and was just getting to the mid-climax of the book. “there are no intruders aboard the ship, i hope.”

“not exactly…” she clasps her hands together as she disappears and reappears into view, sitting on the bed next to naji. she props herself up on her elbows next to the barsen'thor, who turns some of her attention to the hologram. “you did say you wanted kids one day…”

“that is true, holiday.” naji smiles to herself as she flips the page. it was a dream she’d had since she was young, but given her position as a warden of the order, felix and her had pushed it back as far as they could. in the prime of their lives, neither was exactly ready to have to resign themselves to the ship or an apartment to care for a child just yet. home was where the heart was, and her heart was with felix iresso. naji wasn’t ready to share it just yet with a baby. “why?”

“well, where do you think that force presence is coming from, if only you can sense it?” holiday purrs, rolling onto her back.

“i’m not sure, holiday.” she answers absentmindedly as the other female groaned. “why, where do you believe it’s coming from?”

“naj, you’re a great person, you’ve helped tharan day in and day out and are even the warden on the jedi order. but could you please listen and think for just a second?” she nearly begs the woman. “why else would i ask about a force presence and then kids within the same span of five minutes?”

“i’m not su-” she pauses for a second, halfway in between flipping another page without even thinking about holiday’s question before the realization sinks in. the force presence was relatively new, and while small, it enveloped her in a way she’d never felt before. only before when she’d reached out in the force for a younger being, such as nadia or the younglings at the temple. innocent, full of life and a passion for adventure. a fire that couldn’t be quenched, but a soft, warm feeling that left you feeling euphoric.

but…

turning slowly to the smirking hologram, she puts the holonovel down on the opposite side of her, trying not to show the anxiety pulsating through her veins as she continues thinking, running a hand through her hair. “holiday, what are you implying?”

“i think you know exactly what i’m implying.” she grins, but her face drops once she sees that naji hasn’t broken into a smile yet. “naj, you do know what i’m implying, right?”

naji stands from the bed, holonovel forgotten as her eyes darken, her hands becoming sweaty and heart rate increasing. “h-holiday-”

“naj, aren’t you happy?” holiday asks, disappearing and reappearing next to her. a panic attack is creeping up, as her chest tightens, her hands wrapping around herself, tears begging to fall from her eyes as the pink woman is trying her best to comfort her. “i’ve heard most women are excited at the whole 'expecting’ part. i’d never be able to bear my own children.”

“holiday, get. out.”

“naji-” the hologram knows she can’t touch her, as her hands phase through her as the jedi flinches away from her, a fearful look her eyes. “it’s going to be okay-”

“holiday i said GET OUT.”

holiday pauses for a moment, as if she’s run into a malfunction or a bug, before lowering her head and shimmering out of her room. she’s shivering, as if it’s too cold in the room as her vision blurs. she can’t help but panic, she’s afraid. it was bad enough she’d gone behind the council’s back and married not even another force sensitive, but a solider. something she’d sold out another padawan for while she was on tython.

and now what?

she was already carting felix off on mission after mission to save the jedi from utter destruction, attempting to keep the republic in one piece. she was trying to be her best, she wanted to be her best. she wanted to be the padawan everyone saw when she arrived to the temple, the one they could rest all their hopes and dreams for the future on.

what would they think of her then? she’d broken the jedi could already, passion was something she fed off now. was she dipping into the dark side already? naji never felt darkness around her, and nadia admitted her force aura was like the suns of tatooine.

and now she was possibly dropping a baby on him as well?

staring at her hands through teary eyes, she couldn’t help but think,

'where did i go wrong?’

felix knows something’s off as soon as he boards the ship after a particularily harrowing supply run (imps, stars they’d be the death of him). usually naji always greets him when he arrives, or eventually comes out of the cockpit or from below deck. he doesn’t immediatly panic though, possibly she’s meditating with nadia, and he wouldn’t want to bother his wife if that was the case. she’d get so wrapped up with her padawan some days that she’d be in a trance for maybe an hour afterwards until the bond was severed for a bit.

but, the ship is oddly quiet. zenith sits at the table near the intercom, in his own world of politics and freeing refugees (all very admirable), so other than an offhanded wave from the sandy colored twi'lek, he heads belowdeck.

what’s off is that there’s hushed whispering. qyzen is tinkering with something near the ship’s engines when he checks that room, and that nadia is nowhere to be found in the medbay (where she usually resides), and he picks up his wife’s name from holiday’s voice in the cargo bay. it’s too quiet, but the female hologram sounds concerned.

“holiday! you know she’s sensitive, why would you do something like that behind her back?” nadia asked hushedly. “you didn’t even offer to help her, you just dropped it on her like a bombshell!”

“i’m sorry, nadia. but it was either that or the multitude of other things that could happen if you ignore it for too long. after a bit of research on the holonet, i found out that using the force extensively can endanger not only her but-”

“yes i know that!”

“you didn’t know that beforehand, did you, nadia?” holiday sounds exasperated as he creeps further and further down the stairs and near the cargo bay’s doors. “i thought she’d be happy, i know i’d be!”

“holiday, dear. our fair nadia is correct in her assessment of your actions. this shouldn’t have been taken so lightly. you are aware of her and lieutenant iresso’s position on the matter.” tharan says, as he catches felix’s eye as he steps into the cargo bay, shifting awkwardly as neither woman meet his gaze. “lieutenant, you’ve arrived back to the defender in one piece.” tharan welcomes him back in a slightly standoffish manner.

“that’s right.” he says, raising an eyebrow. “what exactly did you drop on naji, holiday?”

if a hologram could seem embarassed, holiday did in that moment. she flickers in out of existence, hiding behind a curtain of hair as she frowns. she still freaks him out a bit, with the increased sentience. he keeps thinking she’s a real person, just halfway across the galaxy. she lowers her gaze, not meeting felix’s. “where is she, anyways?”

“she’s in your quarters.” nadia answers quietly, arms crossed. less being threatening, but a stance he often noticed was the product of anxiety from the younger woman. “holiday, you tell him. it’s your fault we’re in this mess.”

instead of answering, she shuts off completely. tharan sighs, and felix knows that there’s no way he can get her back. forcing her back into a holographic form causes some uneeded technical difficulties, including being shocked with a low-voltage electric shock if she was feeling particularily mischeveous. “do i have to ask one of you?”

nadia and tharan share a look before turning back to him. “i feel it would be impersonal if we tell you. you may be more inclined to ask your fair jedi.”

“what’s so wrong? is she okay?” he pauses for a moment before almost rolling his eyes at the two. “if you two keep trying to communicate through your eyes i will eventually get an answer from one of you.”

“of course, felix.” nadia says, twisting her robes in her hands. her haphazardly cut hair does nothing for the sad look behind her eyes as she excuses herself. tharan busies himself with something else in the cargo bay before scuttling out to speak with qyzen. out of sight of the others, he does try to keep from bolting up to his quarters, concerned for his wife’s safety. had she fallen ill without him ever knowing? naji did have a tendency for hiding her own pain in favor of healing his. while not a sage, she was was capable of healing faster than tharan could, even though it took a toll on her force abilities and health.

“naj?” he asks, knocking on their shared quarters’ door. “you alright?”

no answer. maybe she’d headed planetside for the night, but he found that unlikely. “i’m coming in.” he said softly, before unlocking the door.

as always, it’s dark. neither of them do much work here, so they have no reason to really keep the lights up that high or that bright. stepping inside, he can’t hear anything, and can’t see her either. however, she gives her position away as he hears shuffling from the bed. he can just make out her form underneath the rose gold comforter, and after slipping off his armor and boots, goes over to sit opposite to her. “naj, i know you’re there.”

“go away, felix.” he’s only getting more concerned, as her voice sounds hoarse.

“naji, did you get yourself sick?” he asks, turning to face his wife. he catches a glimpse of her puffy red eyes in the dim light before she rolls over to face the wall. she’d been crying, for whatever reason. or, she’s caught herself a nasty cold. placing a hand over her shoulder, she flinches before curling into herself. “don’t be like that, please. you didn’t even come to greet me when i got back.”

“i didn’t want to.” she mumbles, pulling the blanket over her head.

felix knows better than anyone that his wife has secrets, enough to fill one of those boxes and then some. he doesn’t know enough of them to pull one to memory just like that, only that she’s been relatively sheltered within the temple since she was child, and that he was in absolute awe the first time he met her. but, something’s eating at her, and he’s not sure what. and seeing his wife in any sort of pain drives him mad, and not in the way he wants to be either.

wordlessly, he pulls the blanket back just enough for naji’s face to be facing him now. “naj, if something’s bothering you, you don’t have to face it yourself. we’re a team, remember?”

her hair pools around her in a blonde ocean as he brushes damp strands of it out of her face. she must’ve been crying while he was on the ship, and a part of him wishes he’d ignored tharan and the others and come straight here. “what’s bothering you?” he whispers as he helps her sit up against the headboard. she slumps further onto him, a few quiet hiccups escaping her.

“h-holiday-”

“i already know she told you something. she didn’t elaborate.” he answers, smoothing back her hair before she looks up at him, blue grey eyes red and shiny with unshed tears.

“i-i’m so sorry, felix.”

“for what? you never did anything wrong.” he responds. “naj, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”

“i should’ve been more careful, this was never supposed to happen, and now…” she trails off into silence. “the force presence i felt, it wasn’t an intruder.”

“okay?” he asks, before she cuts him off.

“felix, it-it’s a child.” he can almost hear her tears rising up again as he tries to take stock of the situation. “i, i messed up. i’m..pregnant.”

felix iresso hates one thing (well he heavily dislikes quite a few things), and it’s when she cries. he doesn’t like it when anyone cries, but when naji breaks down, something in him shatters.

he lets her cry, because there’s no stopping her when does. she’s not a loud crier, but her weeping is enough to make anyone shed a few tears. given, they had both been extremely careful since their first time together (and one of the few times they were every together in such a manner), as she’d expressed her concern of ending his career early (though he’d assured her he was her lieutenant first and foremost) with the prospect of a child. as the warden of the order, he could only imagine how disappointed and crushed she’d be to lose that position that she’d worked her whole life for.

“naj, you don’t need to cry over something you can’t control.” he says quietly, as she shifts herself to rest her head on his chest. “it would’ve been nice to wait a while,” a long while, “but whatever you want to do, i’ll support you through it. whether you don’t want a baby around, or you do, i’ll always be here for you.”

naji’s content to stay with him for the rest of the night. they don’t talk, not about anything. their impending future or her breakdown earlier in the day. the one thing that he does intend to ask her in the morning, as she reads in his lap, is that she wasn’t going crazy. felix had felt that presence too, though he figured not nearly as a strong. he’d thought she’d been running a fever everytime he’d even grazed her skin. but as he adjusted his grasp around her waist, he smiles. deep down, he does hope naji keeps their baby. something with such a bright presence couldn’t be anything that bad.

i really hope i characterized felix right. he and andronikos are my favorite romanceable companions.

#swtor #star wars the old republic #swtor oc #original character #swtor fanfiction #swtor fanfic #fanfiction #felix iresso #naji iresso #female jedi consular/felix iresso

6 notes · View notes

anotherescsite · 3 years

Text

THE ALBANIANS 2021

Festivali i Këngës 59 is the first national final out of the gates in Albania which has been a tradition for a little while. There was a time in the early 2010s were the Ukraine tried to muscle in on the honour, but the Albanians have stayed strong to continue with the tradition. The semi finals begin December 21 and the final is on December 23.

RTSH have decided to hold their national final outside in the winter evening air. I expect everyone will be performing in a puffer jacket, a beanie and mittens and no scantily dressed women and bare chested men. The national final splits the list of 26 songs (there may be a withdrawal - keep reading) into two semi finals to with the top 10 each going to the final for the right to represent the country at Eurovision 2021 in Rotterdam. As usual, the songs are in native language. They have the ability to request a language change after they win the Festival.

I am listening to them for the first time without any bias towards any of them of the preferences of others. I’ve only heard of one of these performers that I can recall. They are in alphabetic order for no particular reason and have listened to studio versions.

Agim Poshka – “Vendi im” (“My place”) The music is very pleasant to listen to; it is like the music to accompany a hymn. Agim’s voice is a little lackluster and it drones on which is a shame because the musical accompaniment is very nice.

Anxhela Peristeri – “Karma” This begins with a loud opening and then scales back to a ballad which I found unusual. Anxhela has a decent voice and at half way it picks up an Oriental beat and some pace. It doesn’t reach its potential though, and I’m somewhat disappointed. Her name translates to ‘Angela Pigeon’ which i found amusing.

Devis Xherahu – “Peng” (“Hostage”) A lovely Spanish guitar and Devis vocals are appropriately mournful and suitable. It picks up the pace and I like it alot. May not set the scoreboard alight. Decent entry.

Durim Morina (Mirud) – “Nëse vdes” (“If I die”) An attractive ethnic entry with the addition of electric sounds. I like the vibe and mood of the song; it has some challenging vocal moments that make it sound like an anthem, but not so.

Enxhi Nasufi – “Njësoj” (“Same”) Upbeat number and Enxhi has pleasant vocals. It seems a bit dated like a mid 90s number. It’s okay as songs go.

Era Rusi – “Zjarri im” (“My fire”) A very different sound which sounds almost modern indigenous. Very exciting sound and I’m eager to see the stage production for the song. It does morph into a different creature for the chorus, but still interesting as a whole.

Erik Lloshi – “Jo” (“Not”) A quiet ballad song that suits Erik’s voice. Drum beat adds some drama, but it could be forgotten without a decent performance.

Evi Reçi -“Tjerr” (“Spin”) It is an interesting soundtrack to the song but I don’t know where it is heading. Sometimes sultry, sometimes country, sometimes traditional making it a very awkward song.

Fatos Shabani – “Ty” (“You”) I like the way the acoustic guitar works with his voice and the strings. He wrote it and it seems very personal. It works, but it won’t set the world alight.

Festina Mejzini – “Kush je ti dashuri” (“Who are you love”) There are some nuances to this song that make it special, but I’m not sure there are enough to sustain the interest of the audience. Festina seems to have a nice voice, but I’m not too taken by it.

Florent Abrashi – “Vajzë” (“Girl”) Florent took part in FIK 54; and doesn’t have the power seen back then. This is a sweet ballad, it is restrained and it’s very safe. I’m really disappointed.

Franc Koruni – “E morën botën” (“They took the world”) Franc brings some class to the show. It is a studio version which is a little restricted by has scope to be much more interesting live. Franc has a voice that could go down well, or fall flat.

Giliola Haveriku – “E lirë” (“Free”) Ballad with predominant piano, well placed percussion, touches of electronica and soaring notes. This could do very well if performed and styled well.

Gjergj Kaçinari -“Më jep jetë” (“It gives me life”) It begins with spoke singing which I don’t like. While the music is dramatic, but I’m really not taken by the style of it or the singing of the song.

Inis Neziri – “Pendesë” (“Penance”) A power ballad which has the classic Albanian anthem punch to it. This will work very well with an orchestra and Inis has a very nice voice to carry it.

Kamela Islamaj – “Ajo vajza” (“That girl”) A piano ballad which seems like elevator music. Not a powerful song or much interest for me. It seems very washed out and dated.

Klevis Bega (Kastro Ziso) – “Vallja e jetës” (“The dance of life”) Thankfully, a non ballad. The music is great and the beat was louder and faster. It could perform very well on a stage with the right back up. Could be a bit to repetitive.

Klinti Çollaku – “Do t’ja dal” (“I will do it”) I’m sorry to say it, but this sounds like a filler. It’s a bit quiet and there is a unpleasant droning electric organ. It changes to a more grungy electric guitar sound, but it changes back quickly. Klinti does some vocal aerobic near the end; not saving the song though.

Manjola Nallbani – “Ora e jetës” (“The hour of life”) has disappeared from Youtube and the link to the song on the RTSH gives an error. Expect it will be withdrawn or replaced.

Orgesa Zaimi – “Valixhja e kujtimeve” (“Suitcase of Memories”) Albanian jazz. Not a bad thing if you can pull it off. Orgesa’s vocals suit the song, but I’m not a fan of the style.

Rosela Gjylbegu – “Vashëzo” An interesting song that has a curious sound and vocal combination. It seems like a Oriental-Albanian fusion which is really lovely to listen to. Looking forward to this live.

Sardi Strugaj – “Kam me t’ba me kajt” (“I’ll make you cry”) Mournful opening and creepy opening and I was expecting a bit of an explosion of sound which didn’t come. The songs music is quite dramatic to add tension to the song, but it overshadows and overwhelms the singing. Shame.

Stefan Marena – “Meteor” This could be better live; I think they were trying to get a sound that hasn’t been captured in the song. Quite a conventional song that I don’t think is special, but with the right sound it may be a surprise.

Viktor Tahiraj – “Nënë” (“Mother”) I’m not a fan of songs about their Mummy, so this is at a disadvantage already. And a gentleman of this age should know better. The song is decent actually; the sound is good contemporary number. Viktor’s voice less so.

Wendi Mancaku – “Si ajo” (“Like Her”) Quiet number that is well written to highlight the pleasant voice of the vocalist. It’s tempo is slow and can be mistaken for a boring song, but it is far from it. There is a sensual velvety sound to the song. I like it.

Xhesika Polo – “Më mbron” (“It protects me”) Xhesika has a very rich voice and this is another song that has been written to take advantage of the singer’s talent. It is a very well written ballad that seem like a journey in a song. This could be a dark horse depending on the live performance.

CONCLUSION

The Albanian Festivali i Këngës always brings forward new music that is different to what has been heard before and has it’s own flavour. It is a good selection of songs for a national final with few songs that don’t interest me.

I can’t pick a favourite of the lot. If i was going to name a winner, I’d say “Pendesë” more than anything else. It has all the makings of the usual Albanian entry. I would welcome a win for E lirë, Më mbron, Vashezo or Nëse vdes.

#esc #eurovision #rotterdam #2021 #the netherlands #albania #festivali i kenges

0 notes

clove-teasdale · 6 years

Text

holmes & watson at the ball

*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧

A/N: challenge #4! I asked for two more days cause I had a lot of things this week (IM OFFICIALLY 18 YALL. FIRST FIC FINISHED AS A TECHNICAL ADULT(?)) Anyhow. Here is the fic. I was still pretty busy today so this might suck but thERE IS PROGRESS SO. have fun reading and forgive any weird writing or typos. Ft. detective crooks ™, one of my guard ocs cause I always bring one up lol & nate. Thanks @brooks-schreave @nathaniel-schreave @eloiseduval for the rps that couldn’t all be included so this wasn’t a monster fic. around 3,2k words

*:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧ *:･ﾟ✧

“Your drink, Lady,” Rogers said, offering me a glass with a half bow as a joke. I snorted, but accepted it, taking a sip of the mysterious orange-tinged drink and tasting the alcohol.

“Well, Officer Rogers,” I stated dramatically, ready to tease him. “I doubt your commanding officer will approve of you giving alcohol to a Selected.”

He gave me a fake glare. “You said to surprise you. I just complied with a cocktail. Besides, it’s not like you’re not old enough.” His amused grin disappeared when I raised both eyebrows, silently asking, ‘am I though?’ He took the drink from my hand and set it on the silver platter of a passing servant. “Never mind.”

I laughed and stole his drink instead. His was just cider, which is what I would’ve asked for if it weren’t for my curiosity of what he would bring otherwise. “I see you like to keep it clean.”

He nodded, gladly taking my comment as a compliment and glancing at the ballroom. “I’m technically still on duty.”

“Fair point.”

I watched the beautifully decored ballroom too, in the midst of couples, spotting Eloise now done with Officer Barnes and dancing with Brooks. The prince looked different in his suit. A good different as he laughed at something our shared friend had told him. The brat kinda had a nice laugh… but anyway, that left my options to be, hanging around Rogers, chatting it up with another Selected or finding someone else to dance with.

I knew at some point of the night I would end up dancing with Brooks since we’d agreed to do so when our lead arrived, but that wouldn’t happen at the moment. Eventually, I was certain Rogers would be asked by another young Lady to dance with him. With no doubt, his good looks would help him. That meant I needed to figure out what I’d do next. My goal of making at least one friend so far had been accomplished with Eloise, but I had yet to establish any meaningful conversations with anyone else.

I was planning on it. Really, I was. But I was always too busy with research on the journal–or actually, any excuse I could come up with. After the success of Marshall’s birthday party, I considered her to be a good prospect though. For a moment, I thought I could try talking with her tonight. Even someone else for the sake of trying.

Many of the girls seemed to be getting a bit too excited about the variety of beverages available, however, and I did not do well with drunk people. While searching for sober familiar faces, I found the one prince we were all supposed to be there for. Finally free to talk.

“Go ahead,” Rogers teased when he noticed where my glance was.

I rolled my eyes, but handed him the glass back, telling him to shut up and walking over to Nate. Tapping his shoulder, I said, “Hello there,” and he turned around.

“Hey, how are you?”

“Quite free to dance at the moment.”

“Well so am I, would you care to dance?” He held out his hand for me to take.

“My, how unexpected of you Nate. It would be a pleasure.”

“Hello, dear Nathaniel.”

Brooks. A mischievous smile on his face and a confused Eloise on his hand as he approached me and Nate mid-dance. Stealing my hand from Nate’s, he changed my place with Eloise and told them to have fun. With no further explanation, he dragged me away.

“Hi.”

That wasn’t how I’d expected him to ask me to dance. Not now. Once I’d offered Eloise and Nate a polite smile, I gave him a deadpan look. “Was there no better moment for this?”

“Nope. See that guy?” He gestured towards a group of men that were clearly advisers. His hand was on my waist and my own on his shoulder as we easily slipped into our waltz. “That’s William Holt, father of the advisor John Holt, and one of the names mentioned in the journal.”

I spared them a glance as casually as possible. W.H. “Our mystery initials from the notes?”

“Yes, dear, our mystery initials.” I did my best not to roll eyes at the grin accompanying his joking ‘dear’ and let him continue. “I spoke a bit to some advisors, and I think he’s here on business. There’s been some talk of someone stealing books from the restricted section of the library.”

I raised an eyebrow with a smirk. “My, my… is that so? No wonder I never saw that journal while I was there. I had no access.”

A smirk of his own spread across his face as he whispered, “Neither did I. But tell me, why are they so fascinated that book is gone?”

“Guess we’re on the right track.”

“I have a plan. I’ve noticed key advisors have been flocking around him deep in some random conversation. If we stay close, we may find something.”

“Lead the way…Highness.”

Dancing us towards the men, I could see the same excitement coming off him as I’d seen the day before when I told him about the ink. It was kinda cute to see that childlike enthusiasm. “Be very quiet and listen.”

Once we were at the required distance to do so, I acted as if nothing was more important than our dancing, in reality, eavesdrop alongside Brooks on what the group was saying. They were too immersed in conversation to care about us or the other couples nearby. Nobody was supposed to be interested in their conversation anyway.

William Holt was older than my father but still managed to look decent. His son, John, did not share his silver hair yet but had the same cheekbones and bushy eyebrows.

“I figured this would happen. It’s a bit soon though,” William complained to the others. None appeared too concerned except John, however.

“Aren’t you worried who has it?”

William took a drink. “My bet is Levi.”

I exchanged looks with Brooks at the mention of a name.

“After all these years? He’s ancient by now.”

“He was always a resourceful one.”

“Do you know where he is?”

“Last I checked, Harrison still lives downtown. He throws some annual New Year’s Eve party. We’ll check him out after that. We wouldn’t want to draw suspicion.” William finished his drink after that as his son and the rest of the advisers nodded in agreement.

I mouthed, ‘journal?’ to Brooks and he danced us away to talk.

“We’ve gotta find that Levi guy.”

“Can we be sure he’s our guy?” I wondered. “I mean, he’s definitely related to the whole ordeal, but he might not be the writer of the annotations.”

“Regardless, it’s a lead. He may know who wrote them.”

His hand played with the fabric on the back of my dress as he spoke. I did my best to ignore it, unsure he was even aware he was doing it. Why I didn’t feel the need to mention it was also beyond me.

“Fair enough. We should check this guy out…But later.”

“You’re right,” he nodded, “We have to stay at the ball for a while longer. I’ll get in trouble if I leave.”

“Such a tragedy,” I said with an eye roll, but my sight drifted soon after to the advisers talking around the room. Dad hadn’t come and I pursed my lips, mumbling, “Strange…” at the realization. He hadn’t called me since his last visit, but I assumed he’d be here. He never missed events.

Before I could debate any possibilities in my head, Brooks spun me around. That earned him a laugh as he said, “Riveting.”

“What is?”

“This whole thing. I feel like I’m a part of the Scooby Gang.”

“A two-person gang?” I asked, amused.

As our investigation hit a pause, I found myself truthfully focused on dancing again, taking more deliberate strides as I watched my feet and smiled. All thanks to one name. I couldn’t help but feel excited. One step closer to the truth. “There’s always Holmes and Watson, you know? I’ll let you be my John.”

“John, really?” Brooks almost scoffed. “Dream on.”

“He’s very important too, don’t belittle the guy.”

“He’s the sidekick, Clove. I’m obviously the main attraction here.”

I let out a single laugh but noticed the small smile he gave me. “Don’t flatter yourself that much, Brooks. And stop insulting John! He had the heart of the team… well, depending on the adaptation.”

“If you prefer him so much, you can be him. I insist.”

I rolled my eyes and smiled smugly. “Need I remind you who of us managed to decipher that horrid writing and translate it?”

“Need I remind you of,” he twirled me again, “who started this in the first place?”

I feigned offense with a gasp, not missing a beat on my steps though. “I was doing my own research before you came along in case you weren’t aware.”

“But I definitely sped things up for you, didn’t I? Admit it. You needed me.”

“I had already admitted that… in my head, at least. From day one, that’s why I agreed to work with you. You needed my help as much as I needed yours. We wouldn’t have gotten far without each other.” I cleared my throat, noticing how my last sentence sounded and clarified, “Each other’s help, I mean.”

As I watched the way his lips parted to reveal a small smile, his cheeks turned a slight shade of pink. “I really do appreciate your help. I hope you know that.”

Unable to drift my gaze away, I smiled too, pleasantly surprised by the sincere tone of his voice–the honesty, lacking any hint of sarcasm this once. “Well, now I know…I’m glad to be included.” It was strange to feel shy at the admission, but I only averted my eyes for a second and then looked back up. “It seems my help on other matters served its purpose too.”

“What do you mean?”

“No stepping on feet so far…and I haven’t been spun into oblivion either,” I teased and he rolled his eyes.

“Don’t jinx me.”

I chuckled. “Just keep it up.”

The song slowed down even more as he pulled me closer, like when we’d whispered to each other during dancing practice. The difference was that this time, his hand also covered the back of mine and pulled it to rest against his chest. I wasn’t sure if I imagined his heartbeat or not.

“Only for you.” His voice was dramatic as if it were one of his many jokes. Nonetheless, it somehow felt like there was some truth behind the words.

Blinking up at him, I was unable to reply for a few seconds at the change of positions. My head kept making mental notes that seemed rather unnecessary, such as the warmth of his hand seeping into mine. The way my heart almost fluttered at the proximity of our faces. The smell of hazelnut on him. My lack of concern for how close we were to each other. It felt very different from yesterday’s practice.

I rolled eyes at his joking tone, but when meeting his gaze again, a lump formed in my throat. I hoped my freckles would hide my slight blush as I said, “Lucky me.”

A small laugh. “As a gentleman, I feel like I should compliment you.”

I chuckled softly too. “But as Brooks, you must mock me, I’m sure.”

“No.” He paused. “A gentleman would feel required to tell you how lovely you look, but Brooks… I would mean it.”

My heartbeat was definitely skyrocketing now and I wasn’t sure why or how to make it stop. He’s just being nice. I stared down at my dress, smiling. Hopefully, not too awkwardly. That was actually… really sweet of him to say.

“Is that so? Well, you look quite handsome yourself.” I kept the tone light and decided not to make a big deal out of it. “Not too bad…”

“The word you’re looking for is ‘dashing’.”

“How very humble of you.”

A while later, the song came to an end and he released my hand slowly. I kinda missed the feeling of it wrapped around mine. “Meet me at the door when I signal you. We can research the address of that guy. We don’t have a lot of time until New Year’s Eve.”

An hour or so later, when I’d danced with Barnes, some politicians and chatted up with Eloise about that new trinket around her neck upon her return to the ballroom, I saw Brooks near the exit, brushing a thumb over his nose. I returned the signal and made sure no one was watching before walking over.

Brooks pulled me out into the hallway. “Sorry if I cut your evening short.”

“We have to figure this out anyway. It’s the best lead we’ve got.”

He nodded and led the way to another part of the palace forbidden for the Selected. Once there, he gestured for me to be silent and got a key from his pocket. I kept a lookout as he opened the door cautiously. I had to reprimand myself for suddenly agreeing on his Scooby gang comparison.

He let me walk in first and closed the door softly behind him. I decided to ask where he’d gotten that key at another moment and followed him as he swiftly made his way to the single computer in the room. Technology had been making a comeback amongst some crowds in the past years but was still pretty rare.

Despite that, Brooks didn’t seem to have a problem browsing the computer. “This is where they keep the online files of addresses, birthdates, castes, stuff like that. All we have to do is look at past advisors and search for a Harrison Levi.”

My finger traced the top of the old equipment as I took a glance at the other file cabinets and bookshelves in the room. “In how much trouble would we be if we were caught here?”

“Lots and lots.” He glanced up from his typing quickly and asked, “Why?”

I focused on the different folders he was opening on the screen. “Aren’t you concerned?”

“I’ve spent my entire life being nervous about things. I’m past the point of nerves now.” The relentless sound of clicking echoed in the room as he continued. “Here’s the page. We just need to let it load now, which could take…” he squinted at the screen, “a while.”

“Just because I’ve avoided being caught before doesn’t stop me from being nervous, sadly. Especially because this is so much worse than just being out after curfew. I don’t entirely mind the adrenaline, simply want to know how much I’m risking here.”

He replied nothing at first and began humming instead. I couldn’t stop the memory of our duet from crossing my mind.

And all I’ve seen since eighteen hours ago is blue eyes and freckles and your smile… Spinning around in his swivel chair, he faced me, a hint of uncertainty in his features. “I really am sorry to have pulled you away from the Ball.”

I tried to wave away his insecurity. “It’s fine. I had already danced enough and made my presence.” Moving the edges of my skirt, I made the fabric dance around my legs and added with a shrug, “And I got to wear a pretty dress so…”

“You’re not upset I pulled you away from Nate? I know it’s hard to get time with him.”

“He’s a busy guy, but what we got was good. He has a lot of other girls to worry about more than me.” I thought about our conversation during the ball again. I did feel good around Nate, but not like there was something yet. I even brought up the word ‘friend’ without a care in the world. “I‘m pretty sure what we have will always be a friendship and that’s okay.”

Brooks lifted both eyebrows. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah, that’s what it feels like… I like him, but not in that way, you know? Some others already seem to have feelings for him and as much as I care for him it’s not… romantic. I came here knowing love had a very slim chance of striking, so I’m not that disappointed I guess,” I spared him a glance, “Why so surprised?”

He repressed a smile and turned back to the computer. “I’ve always shown an interest in your love life, haven’t I? I’m nosy like that.”

I clicked my tongue and narrowed my eyes at him. Smiling was unavoidable though. “You’re still horrible.” Leaning forward to take a closer look at the screen, I asked if there was a match yet. The computer seemed to continue running over a million old archives, however.

From the corner of my eye, I thought I saw him spare me a glance, like my proximity made him nervous, but the screen finally loaded and stole my attention away. The profile picture of a man in his early thirties had popped up along other windows behind it. The photo was not recent, of course. It had to be from the days this man worked as part of the royal cabinet. Ginger hair and lively green eyes had once gazed upon a camera for that picture.

“It’s a match, holy shoot, it’s a match!”

Leaning even closer to the screen and reaching for the mouse over Brooks, I held back the euphoria bubbling in my stomach, clicking on the other windows to see more information. His files confirmed his years working with the royal family as an adviser. His early resignation did not go unnoticed, but a few clicks later I found what I was searching for.

In a handful of documents, one of them contained his signature. My eyes widen as I read aloud, “Harrison Levi… It’s the same handwriting.” A grin slowly took over my face, “the strokes and loops, the way he strings the letters together.” I turned to Brooks with a wide smile. “It’s him. He wrote the annotations.”

He didn’t move for an instant as if he’d been watching me from the moment I opened my mouth with some sort of fascination. The second passed by fast and he stood up. “Do you know what this means? Clove, we have his address. We can find this guy!”

Running a hand through my hair, I looked back at Brooks, beaming with excitement. “We found him…He’s alive and we know where he lives.” I couldn’t help but laugh. “We even have a party to crash!”

He ran a hand through his hair as well, full of disbelief, in the frenzy of our eureka moment, picking me up, hands on my waist as he swung me around in a thrill. All I could do was chuckle with the same happiness and anticipation. A sense of butterflies in my stomach I finally understood.

Nothing could’ve prepared me for what happened right after, however.

#challenges #//fics #//crooks #brooks tag #nate tag #eloise tag #barnes and rogers tag #//conspiracy #ending hmmmm

8 notes · View notes

saltyslack-toast · 4 years

Text

#KnockTheBook : Anne Frank

“The nice Anne is never present in company, hasn’t appeared one single time so far, but always predominates when we’re alone. I know exactly how I’d like to be, but, I’m only like that for myself. And perhaps that’s why, I’m sure it’s the reason why I say I’ve got a happy nature within and why other people think I’ve got a happy nature without. I am guided by the pure Anne within, but outside I’m nothing but a frolicsome little goat who’s broken loose”

I knew this book exist since I was in elementary school it was on the 6th grade I guess. I saw this book in one of the notability book store (re: Books and Beyond) in kinda so-so Bandung Mall (re again: Istana Plaza). I read the behind book preview and my curious ass was really intrigued, that time I didn’t know wtf is holocaust and my English skill was so poor, I mean like still but now its getting better right????? My 11 years old wallet was penniless, so I didn’t buy the book, that’s ok though because book wasn’t the main source of my happiness and I don’t really read much books that age. Many years later, there was BBW Bandung in 2019, and I’m so excited since I started to read quite a lot of books after I’m in college and just like that, I found a gem I’ve been wanting for since I was starting my puberty and now I’m at the edge of my puberty era (STILL COULDN’T MOVE ON FROM MY PUBERTY DAYS, PLEASE CHECK THE PREVIOUS POST OF MINE OR I’LL KILL U! Never mind it was a trash anyway). I’m gonna review this book in a way this book relating my life, because I SWEAR TO GOD Anne Frank is me in 1942 indeed.

Okay let’s cut the shit off of the personal history attached to this book, cause no one cares, no one probably read this master of shit.

The title of the book is “Diary of A Young Girl: Anne Frank” written clearly in the book’s grayish cover and it has a picture of queen Anne herself writing on her diary I suppose?? So it basically Anne frank writing her story and someone took a picture of her posing like she was writing the story and the picture became the cover of her story that she wrote when someone was taking that picture, got it?. The book is published by Wilco Publishing Book in 2013 in Mumbai, India. The book’s price is written on its cover, it was 19.95 in US Dollar and converted to Rupiah approximately worth RP 326.569, please note that I convert this price when USD 1 is worth RP 16.300 (fuck you corona). But don’t worry, if you are going to buy one in BBW the price is 50% cheaper than the original one, omg someone take me to BBW RIGHT.NOW!.

For those who dumb in history but insist to read this history-biography kind of book (WHICH IS STRANGELY CONTRADICTION, like dude u suppose to have good grades in history class if u like this kinda book, but whatevs I don’t judge), chillax there’s gonna be a short sum about what’s happened in WW II and the origin short story of Hitler gon’ mad with his bonkers political party. Also, there is a little summary about Anne’s previous life before she starts writing her diary in that crazy era she’s living. This book is literally her diary, I said diary, it means u could see her recounting her daily activities in a writing book (Except the fact that she named her diary with Kitty and consider it as her friend).

In this book, you are going to meet plenty bold characters. Here I describe few of ‘em that quite memorable for me. First is Queen Anne herself duh! She’s fucking THAT BRIGHT, I mean she was 13 when she wrote the story of her life, loves to read books, emotionally instable just like a mad teenage typical but she really has very unique perspective of how she depict the whole condition when she was in hiding. Second is her fucking family duh!(2), her mummy is weirdly kind of remind me to my mom FOR REAL, both of them were as problematic as her youngest daughter, sensitive, and caring as regular moms out there. Daddy is totally a sweetheart and kind of hard-working just like most of the Jews I guess?? And Margot which is Anne’s older sister, you know that golden child in the family who always be the spotlight in your big family gathering? Yes she is one of the kinds. Not only Anne and her family that is pretty intriguing, but there is also one little family which also joined Anne’s family in hiding, that is Mr. Van Daan Family and all of their dramas *applauding* that is caused by Mrs. Van Daan’s deportment (She’s quiet funny for me though) . There is still a lot amount of characters that is also involved in this book, but you can read the book by yourself its good honey trust me its good and worth it.

I think for the first time I managed to look serious in previous paragraph right?

What’s very interesting to me is how Anne and her mom fighting could be very relatable to all of us. The peak of these fighting dramas was on Friday, April 2nd 1943, when Anne refuses to have her mum took prayers with her, I would say that was truly heart breaking moment. You know the time when you had a huge fight with your mom and you feel so miserable because you disgust the situation where no one was there for you and all you can do is to blame yourself because you love your mom and realized that she got nothing wrong, and what you did is self-loathing all days long, as her mom said,

“I don’t want to be cross, love cannot be forced”

I’m on my fucking tears for reading that sentence, perhaps people that has lots of problem with their life might be understand exactly how it feels, for longing to just vanish from the world because die in all likelihood would still make people around to be distressed because of you? (OMG Ana, u really need stop exposing yourself!). However, after all the fights with her mum, Anne figured out that it’s only the matter of unpleasantness and misery rebounding all the time. She learned that it still much better for hard words on paper than to be carried along with her mum’s heart (it’s a pro tip y’all!).

“Leave me in peace, let me sleep one night at least without my pillow being wet with tears, my eyes burning and my head throbbing. Let me get away from it all, preferably away from the world!”

Anne was hiding for 761 days, of course many things happened and her relationship with Peter (the only son of the Van Daan’s family) is one of the cutest story I liked. Peter was 3 years older than Anne, in my vision he’s the type of nonchalant chap, yet very sweet inside. Started with Ana’s frustration to be alone, ended with having another person other than her family to be talked to. Peter and Anne, after they were close to each other (because they weren’t really get along together at first), they spent most of their times in the attic which is Peter’s basecamp in the annex, talking about life as a teenager and their complicated family before the life in the annex. It kinda remind me of how surviving life becoming the point of how we see each other’s color, Anne had become comfortable to talk with Peter about all her difficulty and so otherwise. Anyway, their fucking love story gonna prompt you to the nostalgia of young love in mid school.

“Already this morning I noticed that peter kept looking at me all the time, not in ordinary way I don’t know how, I just can’t explain……. I made a special effort not to look at him too much, because whenever I did, he kept on looking too and it gave me a lovely feeling inside...”

It’s not over yet, there’s going to be a lot of scenes that giving you goosebumps which cause by a burglar, yes not a ghost, but a fucking burglar, and other shits that would give you a nerve because Anne’s diary also described how the current war situations going (IT WAS SO INTENSE F U HITLER ROTS IN HELL U DUMBASS). The war was not only happened outside the annex but also inside, the war over making noises when everyone’s sleeping and the use of a little table in afternoon between Anne and Mr. Dussel, I perceived it quite hilarious!

. That’s probably a glance of how this book is so intriguing for me. The perspective of Anne Frank of everything sometimes could be so naïve but also relating to my life as well, even until today. Especially during this corona outbreak which has becoming the pandemic, I’ve stay at my home only for 39 days but already feeling sick even for an introvert and antisocial like me could be that JADED, so right now y’all bitch imagine being Anne Frank have to stayed in a hiding for fucking more than 2 years with exactly the same annoying people every fucking day. Nevertheless, if you guys interested to read this book you can buy it in BBW which available in Tokopedia on 27th April until 3rd May this year, so please don’t miss the chance! (to be noted that im not having any relation to BBW, im just so happy that this bazaar coming up into my life). And also you can check the official website of Anne Frank House in www.annefrank.org, there’s a lot of information you could uncover about Anne and other people in furthermore and the visual of the hiding they have been living (IT’S SO MUCH COOL BRUUH).

I think that’s it, I really had no idea how to review a book, this shit just basically me mumbling my opinion about the books I have read. I hope my writing is getting better than the previous post (even I thought this trash was a degrading quality of mine). And a bit information, I finished and posted this writing in the time of corona virus, it was so hard to everyone enduring all the negative impact from this pandemic on our life, so please if you’re lucky enough to still be able enjoy all the fortunes, please help those who badly impacted of this pandemic and I. BEG. YOU. TO. STAY. AT. YOUR. FUCKING. OWN. HOME. If you’re still strolling around for unimportant purpose and not even using a mask, im literally gonna kill you bitch!

So yeah, that’d be all. Thank you for read until this much guys!

*me talking to non-existing audience*

Xiao, see you in advance!

0 notes

imsarabum · 7 years

Text

Responses to {Part 21} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU Asks~

Please ‘Keep Reading’ to find my response to your ask ^^ As always, I have copied and pasted all asks into this post in regards to last night’s chapter to avoid clogging up people’s dashboards and to avoid spoilers for those who may still wish to read the chapter. Thank you ^^

(I have also included asks that I received in the hours before IWSY was posted ^^)

Anonymous said: So i found IWSY last week and marathoned through it in 2 days and omg its so good im dying for the next part!!! Thank you so much for blessing us all with your writing have a wonderful day/night!!!!!! ❤❤❤❤❤

Oh my gosh thank you for marathoning through it! I’m really happy that you found it and that you’re liking the story so far my dear ^^ I hope you have a wonderful day or night too! ❤

Anonymous said: TONIGHT'S THE MOMENT OF TRUTH!!!

WOOHOO! C:

@mysr3 said: Queen Serren will shed some light for us tonight and poor Jungkook' unbeating heart is ready I can feel it! My heart is also not ready!!! Have A good day Love ❤️ PS I re-read Who are you again! And I find new things that I didn't notice before last time and feel different! You are such a good writer !!!

Hehe yes things were revealed last night with more to be explained c: And yay thank you for reading it again! I’m glad you could pick up on things that you maybe didn’t pick up on before, I personally love when that happens to me :3 ❤ Thank you so much my love :)

Anonymous said: It's 11:14pm in Sydney right now and I am so ready for IWSY! Unfortunately, it's a little known fact time difference is a bitch and I can't read it till the afternoon! *sighs* if only they didn't block tumble at school. -Tall anon

Aww that sucks that they block tumblr at your school! But I can understand why because they wan you to concentrate :( I hope you’ll enjoy it when you read it my love!

@lostheretics said: fEW HOURS TO IWSY AAAAAA *screaming internally* but cant read it immediately bc i have mid tests😔😔😭😭

That’s okay my love! tests and study come first ❤ I hope you enjoy it when you get a chance to read it!

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: iTS TUESDAYYYYYYYYY

YES IT IS!! ❤

Anonymous said: Yuss, vamp!Kook-tuesday!! Highlight of the week ❤

I’m so happy that it’s the highlight of your week ❤ ahhhh that really makes me smile so much!

@m1n-yoong1 said: OMG I JUST REALISED ITS TUESDAY AND IM REALLY HAPPY NOW. My day has been quite bad so I was sad all day until now 😁😁

I’m glad it can brighten up your day my love, I’m sorry that your day has been sad :( *hug* ❤

Anonymous said: I'M READY FOR WHATEVER PARANORMAL SHENANIGANS YOU HAVE PREPARED LETS DO THIS *insert boxer emoji here*

PARANORMAL SHENANIGANS YES ❤ hehe I hope you enjoyed it babe!

@kpoperinthehoody123 said: OMG SARAAAA!!!!!!!!!! I JUST READ THE WHO ARE YOU // IM JAEBUM SERIES ALL IN ONE GO AND IT IS SOOO FUCKING LEGIT THAT I FORGOT CEO JUNGKOOK WILL BE COMING OUT ANY MINUTE NOW!! HOW DO U WRITE THESE MASTER PIECES??? *cries in the corner* However, U have such an amazing and creative mind oh Sara😘😘😘 Can't wait to read 'I wont stop you' part 21 💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Ahhhh thank you so much for reading it alongside IWSY! (I hope you enjoyed last nights update too!) You flatter me way too much D: I just imagine something and then write it, it’s nothing special ❤ Thank you so much my love!

Anonymous said: I've updated your tumblr way too many times tonight.... I'm dying to know what's going to happen! 💕

asdfghj I hope you enjoyed the update beautiful!

Anonymous said: i spent a single day binging the entire IWSY series and i've never been happier because it's been hard to find some good vampire!jk and now i have and i'm living also i remember that i had read it when there was only one chapter and then i forgot about it but honestly im so happy to be back!! your writing is exceptional and as a fellow writer, i'm so happy to have found this and you ❤️❤️

jkdgkjsdg ugh thank you so much ❤ I’m really happy that you found it and returned to it and that you enjoy it ❤ thank you for finding me and telling me that you like my series dear, it really means a lot to me!

Anonymous said: I'VE NEVER BEEN SO EARLY FOR A FIC HOLY--

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT!! ❤

Anonymous said: idk why but i??? Cried during chapter 21 its was sO GOOD BLESS

awh~ sad tears or happy tears? c: Thank you so much my love!

Anonymous said: I had a feeling that I would get the vampire explanation and not the "what the heck is she" explanation. On another note, in really happy with how the whole thing went, like I half expected for it to bee more awkward and for the second hand embarrassment to be worse, but you managed to write in in a way that wasn't over the top and still provided a realistic (as realistic as we can assume a scenario like this would play out) scene. So thank you for once again making the week long wait worth it.

Yes~ I personally feel it would be too unrealistic for them to tell absolutely EVERYTHING in one go~ (Y/N) has had a traumatic time and if they were to just unleash everything then she legit might run away terrified lolol. I’m happy that you perceived it as being realistic - especially when the genre is supernatural. I think, for some people, there will always be an element of cringe when it comes to talking about Vampires but I really wanted to make it as natural as possible. In this chapter, I really just wrote like - how I would react if someone were to tell me. I’d be scared but I’d require proof and I’d be curious if I was able to see substantial proof heh~ Thank you very much for honest and unbiased review of the chapter, it was refreshing to read and respond to - and I hope you have a lovely day ❤

Anonymous said: I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER WEEK FOR THIS MASTERPIECE TO REVEAL WHAT THE HECK Y/N IS?

YES MY LOVE YOU DO ❤ Hehe, thank you for reading it ❤

@moonlighthollow said: Jesus christ.... this was so worth the wait😂😍 I'm soooo inlove with this story omg thank you for writing so perfectly and amazing🙏

I’m glad you found it worth the wait ❤ Thank you so much for reading the update my love!

@lovehaniwhaimagines said: HOLY FLIPPIN SHIT. I binge-read all 20 chapters of I wont stop you just yesterday and waited until the new chapter and holy frickin cow, I LOVE IT. Please keep up the good work, I appreciate every single thing you write :) ~

I’ll keep writing for sure! Thank you so much for reading and enjoying the series love ^^ ❤

Anonymous said: You know you could actually write a book and it would sold to millions of people! You're creative stories and writing are fantastic. I love how you mix humor into your stories, especially in "I Won't Stop You". You are one of the best writers on tumblr no doubt about it. Love you~

I’m not sure about millions of people xD But maybe one day eh!? hehe~ And yes! I love to incorporate a little bit of humour, especially if one of the characters personalities is like that, it can be a great mood lifter or a change of pace throughout the story or chapter ^^ Ah, you flatter me so much ❤ thank you my love, and I love you too!

@parkheehi said: I'm so fucking happy that Y/N was not that mad at jungkook for his secret. :D do you know how many parts I won't stop you will have?? (BTW I DIED WHEN JUNGKOOK SAID 'I won't stop you' AFTER Y/N ASKED HIM IF SHE COULD TOUCH HIS TEETH) Don't overwork yourself and stay healthy!🤗

I have no idea how many chapters~ You guys will know when I do! ALSO THIS ISN’T THE FURST TIME JUNGKOOK HAS SAID ‘I WON’T STOP YOU’ - and actually, the reader has said it before too ;) I guess youll have to go back and read to find out where and when it was said! hehe ❤ thank you my love and I hope you’re having a great day!

@semisweetsuga said: I fukin knew you were gonna end it on a god damn cliffhanger but the update was SO GOoD I loVEd iT!

This should no longer be a surprise anymore~ I’ll gladly wear my crown for queen of cliffhangers ~ hehe, I love Kotooooo ❤

Anonymous said: I JUST ABSOLUTELY LOVE WHEN YOU HAVE "I WONT STOP YOU" SAID IN THE IWSY STORY!!!! IM SO EXCITED FOR NEXT WEEK BECAUSE IVE HONESTLY SO CONFUSED WHENEVER YOU MENTION THE AFFECT (Y/N) HAS ON PEOPLE. ❤️😍

This isn’t the first time that the title has been mentioned in the series! :3 Jungkook has said it once before and so has (Y/N)~ muhaha! I hope you’ll enjoy the storyline when you find out what (Y/N) is ❤ thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME! I HAVE BEEN WAITING LIKE THE WHOLE FUDGING BOOK TO FIND OUT WHY SHE TINGLES, AND THEN YOU JUST SNATCH IT OUT OF MY GRASP AND SAY NOPE YOU'LL HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER FUDGING WEEK TO KNOW THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN YOUR LIFE RIGHT NOW (I know I sound really sad) Ugh 😑 at least you know how to keep your readers along for the ride

Because my dear, I am evil and I enjoy inflicting pain ❤ heh~ Thank you so much for reading and I hope you’ll enjoy the future chapters!

@pandafish said: A very intense and dramatic reveal! I can't want to hear about their history!

Thank you so much my dear! I hope you’ll enjoy it :D

@animeimmortal said: I shit you not i have never been this mad before. The other cliffhangers? Fine ill just deal with it. but this one? LET ME LIVE FOR ONCE I BEG YOU JUST ONE CHAPTER WITHOUT A CLIFFHANGER PLEASE DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE FROM THE LACK OF KNOWLEDGE I AM SO FRUSTRATED I NEED THE REST GOD PLEASE OMG ❤ love you ❤

U mad bro? :3 tehe~ But thank you s always for reading it despite wanting to kill me ❤ I love you too!!

Anonymous said: When she asked to touch his fangs and he was like 'go ahead I won't stop you' I literally had to refrain from shouting TITLE REFERENCE! BOOM!

This isn’t the first time that the title has been mentioned in the series! Jungkook has said it before and so has the reader ;) But it was probably less obvious because I like to slip in those things to see if anyone picks up on it~ heh^^

Anonymous said: *glares at you author* I was this close to knowing. NOW I HAVE TO WAIT 7 MORE DAYS TO GET MY ANSWER TO WHY I'M VAMPNIP!!! GRRAGH>:( But on the bright side, this chapter wasn't as angsty as I feared! Hooray! :) *but I'm still mad at you hmph*- love Vampnip anon

*glares back at you and smiles* muhaha~ Don’t be mad at me because I love you very much ❤ hehe thank you so much for reading it my dear!

Anonymous said: AAAHHH I've waited so long for this IWSY Chapter *^* My jaw dropped when "I" called the Queen 'bitch' >.< I also really wanted to read about her finding out that the Jeon's are the royal family and her beloved Jungkook is a PRINCE <3 maybe in the next part~(?)

Haha yes! You called the Queen a bitch! c: But it can be forgiven I guess due to the circumstances lol ^^ YES MAYBE SO! ❤ thank you for reading the update dear ^^

@omelys-space said: Once again such a great update ❤ I am glad that they all opened up to her and that she had her time to freak out but calmed down pretty soon after that Excited to see what she is now and again gotta give some love to Serrena She is such a babe 😍 Thank you for your hard work and till next week ❤

Ahh thank you so much my love ❤ I’m happy that you enjoyed it and I hope you’ll look forward to next week too! ^^

Anonymous said: You always leave me crying, my heart full yet broken. Every Tuesday. And it's okay because art takes time.

Ahh you make me sound like such an emotional abuser :c I don’t mean to break your heart! *hugs* hehe~ thank you so much for reading the chapter dear ❤

@deboracorrea25 said: OMG!!! Perfect, simply perfect! I just love the way you write, the way you make us feel all the emotions of the characters. I could feel the surprise, the anger, the acceptance, and even the love. I couldn't imagine this to be better, and I know next week chapter of "I won't stop you" will be flawless too. Thank you again for writing this fanfic. Love you!

sdfghj you’re too sweet for your own good, i’m so glad that you could feel all the emotions that everyone in the chapter was feeling ^^ thank you so much for reading it and for looking forward to next week - I’ll do my best!! ❤ I love you too :D

@mocking-butts said: OH MY GOD IM SCREAMING FOR THIS CHAPTER~!! I was literally at the edge of my seat when they were telling her and oh my god I almost cried and I need it to be next week I want to know so badly I love this story so much teach me the ways oh wise one. I love this story so much I can't even right now.

It’s only 6 days away now! *sweats* lolol c: Thank you so much for loving the story, I really really appreciate it that ❤

@fashionkilla124 said: I am SO FUKIN DONE WITH IWSY. I WAS CRYIN AT FIRST BUT HAD ME DYIN AT TGE END I CANT JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL.😩😩😂😂

*pats your head gently* there there my love, its okay~ ❤

@kookies-hoe said: ARGHHHHH 'I won't stop you' JUNGKOOK YOU TEASEEEE AND ALSO HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, THE CLIFFHANGER 😭😭😭😂

Ahhhh but it’s not the first time that the title has been mentioned in the series!Both Jungkook and the reader have said it before :3 thank you for reading it my lovely!

@mysr3 said: SARAAAA!!! I LOVE YOU!!! You saved JK heart and my heart at the same time This chapter I love it. The details are amazingly well portray and I love the humor you threw in there to emphasize Y/N characters in the state she is in or her personality in general. ahhh I love your writing! But you just ripped my heart out dying to know the whole story! I was so sure you would reveal today! I thought I had nailed how today chapter would turned out but I was wayyy offff lol Well played my love ❤❤❤

I’m glad I could save your heart and rip it out at the same time hehe ❤ I’m so happy that you could feel everyone’s response and their personalities in the chapter too ^^ Thank you for reading it dear and I hope you have a wonderful day!

Anonymous said: THAT ITALICIZED I WONT STOP YOU I SCREAMED BIIITTTCCCHHH YAAAAASSSS 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 I love it SO MUCH also the garlic bread part I died that was so fuckjng funny and then the to be continued 😭😭😭😭 y u do dis 2 mE ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

This isn’t the first time that the title has been mentioned in the series! Both Jungkook and the reader have said it before c: LOL I chuckled at the garlic bread reference when I was writing it haha (i’m so pathetic lol) Thank you for reading it despite the frustration of waiting ❤

Anonymous said: If you keep ending IWSTY chapters like that I'm going to explode. It's been continuous cliffhangers omg. I love the story and I can't wait for the next chapter!!❤ love you

Please don’t explode, that would make me mega sad :( And yes - continuous cliffhangers are kind of my thing? my style? lolol I’m sorry but it is what it is! :P Thank you very much for reading and I love you too pumpkin ❤

Anonymous said: okay SARA what the absolute HECK why must you play with our feelings that way?? i really thought we were going to get the tea ☕️ on what the reader is but NO ahhhh lovely chapter though omg 11/10 as always!!!!

Because I love to play and toy with people’s emotions~ does that make me a bad person? c: lolol thank you for reading and enjoying the chapter my love!

@doubletroublesince1994 said: I didnt expect this reaction at all! I thought she'll stay mad for 2 or 3 chapters before finally accepting it 😂😂 On a side note, I particulary loved this chapter because Ive been waiting for the declaration since day 1! Can't wait for tge 2nd part

Ahahaha I hope you still enjoyed it though my love! And it makes me really happy to hear that you’re looking forward to the next part too! Have a wonderful day babe ❤

Anonymous said: Oh my gosh this chapter was so good!!!! I can't believe that Jungkook finally told Y/N! Thank you for writing this amazing series. ♡♡ - self care anon (and yeah, I'm trying to take care of myself. The routine is the most helpul part. Love you!)

Hi there self care anon! I’m glad to know that you’re still taking care of yourself and that my series can attribute to that self care routine ❤ And I’m also really happy and thankful to know that you enjoyed the chapter, thank you so much for reading it and I hope you continue to take good care of yourself ❤

Anonymous said: O.o Oh mai gawd Sara, that was sooo good. IWSY part 21, (y/n) stays!!! Yess!!! I've been so excited for today, I was so anxious to see whether or not (y/n) runs out on Jungkook and I'm so glad this part ended the way it did. Without a doubt, IWSY is the main reason I put up with tuesdays. ily soo much! can't wait for next part! - army anon

Hello army anon! I’m so glad to know that you enjoyed the new part ^^ and yes! (Y/N) was never going to run away or leave Jungkook - she loves him too much :D I love you too and thank you so much for reading it!

@audreymv said: MAMA IS ABOUT TO GIVE STORYTIME WOAH. This was a roller coaster of a chapter like she yelled at them and she was angry wow and then like wow next thing ya know is she is apart of the ancestral line. Maybe her parents died by mistake. Ooo it's getting interesting

STORY TIME WITH SERRENA TURN UP! lolol~ Thank you once again for reading the new update and I hope you’ll enjoy next weeks too! Have a great day my love ❤

@btsfanficss said: What the heck I swear I was following you this entire time :o BUT ANYWAYS THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EXISTING I LOVE IWSY SO MUCH IVE BEEN FOLLOWING IT FOR SO LONG ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

That’’s okay my dear don’t worry! A lot of the time I assume I’m following people but it turns out that I’m not so I totally understand xD Thank YOU for existing too and thank you so much for reading IWSY ❤

Anonymous said: Not gonna lie, I squealed like a fangirl when Jungkook said, "I won't stop you" LOL. But you're seriously killing me every week sara! I die every Tuesday, then get resurrected the next Tuesday just so I can't read the next chapter 😂 UGH AND AGAIN? REALLY SARA? IM STILL WAITING TO FIND OUT WHAT Y/N IS 😭😂 I'm hoping the next chapter will be nice and long for me to indulge in 😉... and not gonna lie, I'm scared of the idea of vampires, BUT I REALLY WANT ME A VAMPIRE JUNGKOOK OMG 😜 - 7:45 Anon

Did you know that this wasn’t the first time that Jungkook said I Won’t Stop You? The reader has actually said it before too c: lolol And don’t worry - the next chapter will probably be around 7k words (just like this chapter was), because it’s essentually the chapter that I explain the lore I’ve created/decided upon ❤ AND SAME I REALLY WANT A VAMPKOOK and I also want Vampire Vmin too lolol~~ Thank you so much for reading the new chapter as always 7:45 anon ❤

Anonymous said: YESSS I WONT STOP YOU AAAh. This made my day lol , I love you!!!! Have a great day c:

Did you know that this wasn’t the first time that Jungkook said I Won’t Stop You? The reader has actually said it before too c: hehe ^^ I love you too and thank you so much for reading my dear!

@ineffabl-y said: IM SHAKEN OMFG but like WHEN IT SAID THE TITLE I SCREAMED also you should use this thing called interactivefics and it lets the reader insert their name inside the fic and I love it!!! just a suggestion tho ANYWAYS CANT WAIT TO BE THIRSTY FOR THIS FIC TILL NEXT TUESDAY <3

Did you know that this wasn’t the first time that Jungkook said I Won’t Stop You? The reader has actually said it before too c: That’s good that there’s a site like that but I think for now I’ll be staying on tumblr because if I moved and started uploading somewhere else, people might get confused :( Thank you so much for reading my love and I hope you have a good day!

@ohheyitsebonyrose said: Saraaaaaaaa my queen. That part was amazing. I'm so glad the protagonist knows of vampires now ^.^ IM SO CURIOUS TO SEE WHAT SHE IS!!

Yes she finally knows! What a relief hehe ^^ Thank you so much for thinking that it was amazing! I hope you’ll enjoy next week too my love ^^

@theninjachan said: I die every Tuesday and rise again every Tuesday. Thank you. Chapter 21 was a delight (cont.) Oh and “Go ahead; I won’t stop you” Nut bust x10000000000

Did you know that this wasn’t the first time that Jungkook said I Won’t Stop You? The reader has actually said it before too c: Hehe, thank you so much for reading it my love and I hope you’re having an amazing day!

Anonymous said: I CANT TAKE NO MORE. THIS TUESDAY TO TUESDAY IS KILLING ME. I JUST WANT Y/N AND JUNGKOOK TO BUMP UGLIES AND BE HAPPY. BUT THIS CHAPTER WAS SO INFORMATIVE AND INTERESTING LIKE I WAS LIKE AHHHHH SNAP ITS GOIN DOWN NOW. But on a real note like this story is my shit. I don't mind waiting every week but I do. But like I don't. But then again I do. I'm just confused and I need to know what up with y/n cuz my theories are hella wild and I need the tea ☕️. I love you so much! 💜 ~LilKookieAnon

BUMP UGLIES AND BE HAPPY LMAO I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LIL KOOKIE ANON :3 I love you too and don’t worry, all will be explained in time, I promise you!! Have a wonderful day my dear and thank you so much :3

Anonymous said: Wait, so since Serrena is older then Jeonju does that make her a cougar? 🤔😂

I mean, I guess so c: A hella cougar tho! hehe~~

Anonymous said: I HAVE NO WORDS. That chapter was amazing!!!!!! I'm jungshook. But in all honesty I really want everyday to be Wednesday!! *sigh* I'm so excited for chapter 22! -Tall anon

Thank you so much my dear! That means so much to me Tall anon :D I’m so happy you enjoyed it!!

Anonymous said: How long do you think I Won't Stop You is going to be because honestly I need it to be as long as possible!! I absolutely love it

I have no idea how long it will be but it won’t be ending any time soon ^^ you guys will know as soon as I do! thank you so much for reading and enjoying it my dear ^^

Anonymous said: OH MY GOD I LITERALLY SANK DOWN IN MY SEAT WHEN HE SAID "I WON'T STOP YOU" ITS LIKE YOU MADE ALL OF THESE CHAPTERS JUST TO SAY THAT ONE PHRASE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IM SCREAMING

Did you know that this wasn’t the first time that Jungkook said I Won’t Stop You? The reader has actually said it before too c: It will be a reoccurring sentence throughout! I hope you’ll be able to find them all c: hehe I love you so much too and I’m so happy you enjoyed the chapter!!

@jynxy24 said: I hate you so much, Sara. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MEEEE AND JUST AS SHE WAS ABOUT TO TELL?! COME ONNNNNNNNNNNNNN! (Reader was adorable with the way she was asking question :3) I swear when I saw that cliffhanger, I was like, "Wha- Uh- Sara!" ISTG I'M SO CONFUSED AND FRUSTRSTED😂😂😂 Staph torturing me, Sara😂

Awww don’t hate me because I LOVE YOU very much c: And you should know by now that I love to torture you c: But thank you very much for reading the new chapter Jynxy my love ^^

Anonymous said: God damn it you know like what even what the actual fuck. I am more than shook rn ok. I am relieved nothing too bad happened but I am on edge now with that cliffhanger (& all others). I love it & dislike it (I don't like using hate cuz it's a strong word u kno). I'm sure u get that a lot tho lol. I am so excited for the next part oml I'm so eager to find out what the reader is & y she makes vamps feel things. It sucks to wait but I am really looking forward to the next part 💕 take care 💕

I do get it a lot haha it’s a weird feeling to know that people love and hate me at the same time lolol xD Thank you so much for reading and I’m sorry about the frustration! I hope you’re having an awesome day my dear ^^

@ananyak26 said: Ok I love this chapter!!! How can Serrena be so savage AND sweet at the same time?!.. And jungkook... Ahhh.. Jungkook . Great job as usual author-nim!!!

She’s a badass mum indeed! Thank you so much my love and I’m so happy you enjoyed the new chapter!

Anonymous said: Love the 'I Won't Stop You' series! I found it a few weeks back and it's amazing!!! Always looking forward for each Tuesday (well Wednesday for me since I'm 7 hours ahead of you)

Ahhh thank you so much sweetie! I’m so happy you found it and that you’re enjoying it ^^ And ugh, damn timezones, they ruin everything!! lol I hope you’re having an amazing day ^^

@angelbeats47 said: YO SARA!!! I'm really getting angry reading I Won't Stop You!!! Like seriously you're writing is fantastic and I can't handle this anymore.... I literally threw my pillow as I finished reading the latest chapter 😡😡😡😡 THIS STORY IS TOO GOOD! I'M GETTING MAD BECAUSE I GOTTA WAIT ANOTHER WEEK FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER 😫😫😫😩😩😩 ugh so good so good 👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽

Hiya doll! :3 You only have to wait another 6 days so it’s not too far away right? c: hehe, thank you so much for reading and I’m sorry it makes you angry :P I hope you’ll enjoy the next chapter!!

Anonymous said: I die every Tuesday bc of your clifghangers!!! Asdfhklhdf your work is so good, i literally binge read all of 'i won't stop you' yesterday and its killing me inside!! Also, a part of me wants yoongi to fall in love with her and become a better person but i also want her to end up with jungkook ahhhhh can u feel my pain T__T

Awh thank you so much my dear! Glad to know that you’re enjoying the story and I’m sorry about the frustration you feel heh ^^ Have an awesome day/night!!

#imsarabum #responses #asks #iwsy #i won't stop you

22 notes · View notes

limejuicer1862 · 5 years

Text

Wombwell Rainbow Interviews

I am honoured and privileged that the following writers local, national and international have agreed to be interviewed by me. I gave the writers two options: an emailed list of questions or a more fluid interview via messenger.

The usual ground is covered about motivation, daily routines and work ethic, but some surprises too. Some of these poets you may know, others may be new to you. I hope you enjoy the experience as much as I do.

David Roe

Born in Derbyshire in the 60’s, David has lived in the North East since his early teens. An undiscovered dyslexic in his childhood, he became a secret writer for over 30 years. Conned into a poetry Slam in 2015, and not bound by the rules of literacy and education (he just never learned), David is a free and un-tethered writer and a refreshing new addition to the Spoken Word scene. David likes to think of himself as a “Northumbrian with a wonky accent”. With a mix of both comedy poems and more poignant pieces. Working as a Chimney Sweep, he gets to travel all of Northumberland, meeting a wide variety of people, both of which are a source of inspiration for his art. Sharing his work with audiences, David can be found gracing the stages throughout the North of England. Poet in residence for the wonderful Redefest held near Otterburn the first weekend in August every year, organising their poetry side of entertainment. His first short story Birth of a Legend was published in the collection of short stories “Grimmer Fairytales” published by Spectral Visions Press in October 2018 making him both an Author and a Poet.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Grimmer-Fairytales-Spectral-Visions-Press/dp/1727746740

The Interview

1. When and why did you start writing poetry?

In my early 20’s, i had a bad day at the office and got sent home to ‘think about my future’. I lived in North Shields at that time, so took a walk out to the old Tynemouth Priory, found a quiet bench and sat with my thoughts. A woman, mid 50’s sat next to me and we started to talk.We talked about everything, life, love, family etc, we even ordered pizza to the bench and stayed there till the early hours of the next day.I don’t think there was a ‘click/switch’ moment, but on looking back at my early scribbles, it was around that time i started to write.

2. Who introduced you to poetry?

Defo Dr Seuss and Pam Ayres. Exposed to both, the lyrical nature of their writing gave a struggling boy a love of words. We didn’t have TV as children, dad said it would ruin us, so reading was a common pastime.

3. How aware are and were you of the dominating presence of older poets traditional and contemporary/

Not remotely. I left school with only a CSE 3 in English because of my dyslexia, it hadn’t been invented back then, so i was an ‘awkward little bugger who wont write anything down’. I never reached the level in English where poetry was read or studied. I am still yet to read any of the masters. Poets and writers are painters, but instead of paint, we use words. I love the freedom of a blank canvas, not limited by education or rules. My writing and poems are an expression of me and my thoughts, not history or guidelines.

4. What is your daily writing routine?

I carry pencil and paper with me at all times, but i don’t write everyday. Im a self employed chimney sweep and jobbing builder. Im also one of these nuts who jumps out of bed at 5am every morning, and land running. Writing gets sort of slotted into the gaps of busy days, or days off

5. What motivates you to write/

Over the years, I’ve grown to love words and not fear them. Writing helps me understand words and express myself. Many current topics cause me to write, i work regularly with a few charities that are close to my heart. Im a people watcher and through my job i get to meet a huge range of people from all walks of life.

6. What is your work ethic?

I’m a very practical and grounded person who doesn’t tolerate fools gladly, and i hate ‘ditherers’, if you don’t do something, nothing will change. So drive is never a problem. My dad taught me that if you want something, you have to work for it, then it will hold greater value to you. The journey is as important as the prize

7. How do the writers you read when you were young influence you today?

Bill Bryson and Terry Pratchett. Both love to play with words, like Lego Masters constricting huge artworks. I think the love of words and play on words learnt from them both can be found in my work.

8. Whom of today’s writers do you admire the most?

Tess Gerritsen. I love her attention to detail as she builds the excitement of a story, she is one of the few writers who grip me

9. Why do you write, as opposed to doing anything else?I couldn’t spell very well, so i wrote in secret for 30 years, i knew the words, just didn’t know how to spell them, so i wrote to express the inner artist within me. I truly didn’t think anybody would ever be interested in anything i wrote. So writing helps me see both my own soul, and other peoples.

10. What would you say to someone who asked you “How do you become a writer?”

I don’t think anybody ‘becomes’ a writer. We are all poets, writers, dancers, singers, painters, musicians and lovers, the secret is finding the ones your good at. A very dear friend told me “Just write, it doesn’t matter what its about or whether anyone will see it. Just write, it trains the brain” I find that a mantra to live by.

11. Tell me about the writing projects you have on at the moment.

Just had my first short story published in Grimmer Fairytales late 2018. available on Amazon. Ive wrote my first novel, 14000 words, but its only at 1st edit stage, so i think that wont appear till 2020. Im currently writing a one man show which will form the backbone of a book launch later this year. It will be my 1st book of poetry which is currently with the publishers. And as always, i write for fun and many local projects with poems tumbling from my mad brain.

Wombwell Rainbow Interviews: David Roe Wombwell Rainbow Interviews I am honoured and privileged that the following writers local, national and international have agreed to be interviewed by me.

0 notes

fmlfpl · 7 years

Photo

Lineup Lamentations - GW33

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s.

WALSH (abridged version written by Alon)

Transfers:

OUT: Kun and Tony Valencia

IN: Kane and Joel Ward

So RE: Kane/Bookaku debacle on the pod we decided to go with what was initially dialed in - simple - Kun to Kane. Walsh later chimed in after listening to the pod from Japan to “fuck Lukaku” and bring in Kane and cap him :).. so there we have that. I think Romelu is NOT essential going forward except for this week. Not having big Rom this week is a very very scary risk but Walsh plays dangerously and so here we are.

The second transfer was done when me and Walsh were texting today, like 6pm my time and 7am his time in Japan we got it done. We decided to fuck off Valencia and that whole headache. Hard to imagine him starting more then 1 match in their next three and we decided to triple up Palace who have a great fixture this week and obviously the double next week. Ward the safest/most nailed fuck in their backline so here we are. And Walsh obviously a massive Palace supporter made it all sweeter.

GK: Big Tom Heaton 4 life. But actually not for life he will probably be fucked off by Walsh next week for Valdes.

DEF: Alonso 4 actual life (fuck off Tom). Bellend is away at ‘Boro so maybe Arsenal will keep a clean? Don’t hold ur breath. New great friend Joel Ward comes in against a shitty ass Leicester side who will probably rest 4-5 lads before their UCL second leg vs Atletico (which is now all that matters for them).

MID: Keeping Siggy and Ayew was decided on by Guest Jason, Derek, and me on the pod and so here we are. Siggy is at Watford (PLUM) and brother of Jordan is at Sundy (PLUM) so all of our fingers are crossed that we did good by Walsh. Wilf the legend easily keeps his place and Alexis on thin ice (but not really) is well overdue a tit for the both of us.

FWD: Walsh loooooves Kane. I remember Walsh getting in Kane in 13/14 season when I barely knew who he was and he was priced at like 5.5 mil.. It’s nice for Walsh to have Kane back reunited with Harold or Harrison or who cares. Ibra absolutely nailed into all relevant FPL squads from GW34 onwards with their two upcoming doubles and rounded out by the of nowhere confident Benteke who could haul home vs Leicester. I feel it at least.

CAP: Kane. Scenes.

ALON

Transfers:

OUT: EVERYONE BABY IM ON WILDCARD FUCK EVERYONE

IN: WILDCARD LETS FUCKING FUCKKKKKKK4206969

OK I’ve been tinkering for literally hours today. I’m worthless. Here’s where I ended up and I’ll dig into it below:

GK: Pickford the god has been in my team a long long time and I surprisingly don’t hate him, I kind of love him. That’s saying a lot tbh..

My second GK is Valdes purely for the ‘Boro double gameweek next week. He probably won’t start again for me all season.

DEF: We were all talking shit on Alonso on our text thread and then he put in a peach of a FK and everything was immediately retracted. I know the clean sheets yada yada yada but we love him for his attacking intent. We’re getting basically an attacking winger for 6.4 (when I bought him) who’s out of position listed as a defender and therefore gets clean-sheet points on a top three defense. He’ll also be essential for GW36 and GW37.. It’s simple as that so back off of me and him. Starting Kelly this week home to Leicester - Palace are in scenic form and as I wrote above Leicester are shit and will be resting a bunch of people. Could be a cheeky clean / baps type of game from old friend Martin who should be nailed for at least the next 3-4 matches with their injuries and Sakho unable to play vs LFC. And lastly Holgate in there as mostly an enabler with his cheapness but also because I want to start him this week home Burnley so that’s all that needs to be said about that. Fuck Burnley...

Rounding out the bench Bailly is in as one of only two nailed United defenders (the other being Rojo). Bailly I like a lot more and is seemingly much better on bonus so I’m there. He’s also just a way better player for me which I’m hoping secures his spot more firmly when other guys eventually return. Stephens another bench dweller and $$$ enabler but he’s seemingly nailed. He will not see the pitch for me until GW35 home to Hull (maybe) and then the two doubles GW36 and GW37.

MID: Alli I’ve been saying for weeks on weeks is the best midfielder in the game in terms of value and tits. Kane back is a small dent as Spurs will still fuck most teams sideways. Alli not goin’ anywhere. Alexis I presented my case for him on the pod and my inability to part with him is a large part of the reason I ended up wildcarding after all. Yes he’s in bad form, yes he’s playing out wide, yes Arsenal are fucked up right now. But I think over the rest of the season and two doubles his class will shine through. You wanna leave in the summer Alexis? Show me. Zaha one of the few who kept their place in my squad through the wildcard grinder and how could he not do? He’s a fucking festival and will probably get sold for 50million this summer. Not to mention he doubles in GW34. And lastly King. It had to be King. It’s the obvious move and the template move but he’s just the best guy for the spot since the Southampton’s first (of two) double gameweeks is further away then we thought it’d be. If, say, Soton were doubling this week or GW35 I’d’ve maybe gone Redmond or JWP instead but I cannot reason that in this moment. Go on Josh.

My bench / 5th mid is Romeu. I was tinkering with this spot maybe most of all spots. I had a cheeky Leadbitter in there (good stats but not nailed) and some other fucks too. I ended up with Romeu and his nailedness and his two doubles approaching. He doesn’t have any attacking prowess whatsoever but he will probably play ~360 minutes over GW36 and GW37 and that at minimum is 4 points per GW. Maybe some clean sheets and maybe some bones that could rise a bit. But I’ll take 4 points a week.

FWD: The holy trinity. Romelu the god home Burnley this week looking to cement the fuck out of his very shiny golden boot. King Kane returns and we have all wasted no time to get there. He’s the best player in FPL and there is really no one else to even consider ahead of him for me. And lastly Ibra. Nothing more to be said for Ibra. We all know he’s not explosive and we all know that he’s essential. I hate saying players are essential but Ibra really is.

CAP: Sticking with my pod guns and keeping it on Rom. Kane is sooooo tempting because of his much lower ownership percentage but I gotta stick with my twats here. Kane might not start or might just play 60-70 minutes and Lukaku at home vs shit teams is as automatic as one can get this season. Let’s ride it.

SPECIAL GUEST DEREK C.

Transfers:

OUT: Costa and Aguero

IN (For -4 Points): Lukaku and Kane

Even though it is tough for me to imagine kicking two of my favorite bros to the curb, it seems that Alon did a good job of convincing me live on the pod this week to bring on one of my FPL debut strikers, Bookaku, and the mouth breather, Harold "my real fucking name is Harry" Kane. I will take the -4 hit, which I have only done maybe once or twice this whole year, it makes sense to me due to their tasty fixtures and likely high captaincy rates. Additionally, I still do not have any Spurs players so it seems prudent to finally bring one on. Harry, please treat some dongs for me and make this reunion worthwhile.

GK: For the first time since GW27, I am going to go with General Lee Grant. Tommy Boy is playing at Everton and I am hoping Bookaku scores a hat trick against while the fusion of the Confederate and Union archenemy Generals is playing Hull at home.

DEF: Fresh off a delightful dinner with my parents and me, Marcos A. will get his spot, per usual. Chelsea is playing Manure so not necessarily expecting a clean, but Alonso's constant flanking of the wing and involvement in the offense makes him a locked starter on my side. My other Stoke lad and a stalwart on my squad since GW1, Pieters, will also get the start. Lastly, I will go with Valencia and hope he plays more than 60' despite Mou's vague comments about his status. He played all 90' in the Europa match but with all of United's fixture pile up, who really knows what will happen with him. If Valencia gets rested, I will have Holebas first off my bench.

MID: With Arsenal desperate for a win, Alexis survives one more week on my side and I expect him to return against Shiddlesbrough. Wenger's recent remarks that Alexis prefers to play wide than upfront makes me think he may not be back up top this season which makes me sad, alas. Another one of my loyal lieutenants, Siggy, will get his spot again. No assists or goals since GW 28 has been a complete joke, but the tide must turn for him and his desperate shit team. Leroy Sané gets his second start for my side this weekend. He hasn't returned in a couple of gameweeks but I really have loved his involvement and the chances he has had in recent memory. With Kun out for me, he is now my only City representation. Lastly, but certainly not least, Wilfried gets the final spot for my team this week. Returning in three of his last five fixtures he has looked great and Palace has also been playing very well, beating Chelsea and Arsenal in two of the last three gameweeks. I am hoping for at least an assist from Mr. Zaha this week against Leicester.

FWD: Divock gets his likely last go around for me ahead of bringing on Zlatan next week for the doubles. I am kinda nervous that Sturridge will get the nod ahead of Origi but fingers are crossed. My two new lads, Rom and Kane, will get the last two slots up front. Nothing else needs to be said here.

CAP: BOOKAKU. This is not a very exciting or unique captain shout but feels like a safe and responsible move. Kane versus Bournemouth is also on my mind but I am still nervous that he will not play the full game. Although Bookaku has frustrated me at times this year in certain games when it seems like he is barely involved or even touches the ball, it cannot be overlooked that he has the second most points in all of FPL, only behind Alexis. Burnley is a nice fixture at home so hoping for an explosion from the Belgian while Everton try to make an unlikely push for a top four finish.

0 notes

jasensalvatore · 7 years

Text

A birthday essay. A blog entry:March 9th 2017. It’s midnight, march 9th, one year older then I was last year. It seemed like a short period of time passed this year from last. Ive hit the “big” number so all i can do is go up from here. I kind of do this every year I have a birthday, it becomes MY new years day. I’ve always kind of thought of birthdays that way. January 1st I can start thinking about my long term goals, researching them, thinking about them, march 9th I can put them into practice. Last years birthday was a milestone birthday, I really don't want to repeat the number, not that Im ashamed, its not that, its…well, maybe I’d like to hold on to my “youth” a little longer. I know that doesn't make sense. I wrote last year that by this age Id hoped and wished that I had gone further in my career, a career that I had a lot of promise and dreams for. The slippery slop of I wish I did, I Could have become, if I only….and that may be, this is what I've learned this past year. It hasn't been easy, and its sometime is heartbreaking to come to, I know that I'll always be an actor, Ill always work in the arts. The slippery slop….I do wish I had my head screwed on tighter when I was younger and my head out of the clouds and had gone to an art school, finished my masters, attached myself into my craft and work when I was younger and understood that a career doesn't necessarily begin in Hollywood. There I said it. Now understanding that, I can say that age brings wisdom. I cant help my self, I was at a coffee shop the other day and over herd a girl talking with a friend, it looked as if they were studying something, so i would but them in there early 20’s, and i overheard her say “well the acting thing…Ill try it, if i get discovered….” I had to hold my self back with commenting. Oh my youth…. I know that word well, “If i get discovered” It was my fucking motto with out doing anything about it. It’s not a race, its a journey. Sure had I aimed to go to Yale school of drama was I good enough to have got in at that time in my life? probably not. I knew from a young age that this was always my dream, probably age 12. I wish at that time i would have applied my self different, but this out come would have never been reached. Timing and destiny, yes I believe that by a Divine God. I can remember when i first got to Hollywood I would go around and knock on agents, managers and casting directors doors, I had moxie, I had a lot of ambition, I wanted it and didn't really know how to do it, it had to do with knowing the work, application and commitment. I want the fame with out the do. does that make sense. I remember I walked into a managers office and said something like I'm not leaving until i can see the manager, walked into his office and pulled out some corny TV monologue, Im sure it had heart, I did have a lot of passion in those days. So the manager said ok, and hip pocketed me,(those who know that term) and sent me out on my first audition for a major Disney film, I was like…this is it I’m going to book this and be discovered, and it’s only been a year that I've been in Hollywood. Got the script sides, in those days they had to have them messengered over, I thought I was so…in having a messenger knock at my door with a script. I looked at it read over it, and I think that may have been it….I know knock my self in the head…I show up yo Disney, the gate they have my name, wow. drive on, walk up, wait to be called in…,….walked out herd laughs, Never never got call back again from that manager. I knew that while I might have passion I didn't know how to do the work, sounds like “ Boleslavsky’s the first six lessons.” and thats where I started. I think a big part of it was maturity. I went to NYC in 2002 by my self, set out to another big city, I didn't know anybody, took my first taxi ride, I tried my foot in NYC audition stage and was given a rude awaking. It seems like this is a big part of my life, my career, my dreams. It’s a reoccurring struggle on my journey. My journey. Thus far has been filled with excitement and adventure, pain and joy. In all due truth, I believe when I started to walk outside my bubble and travel around the world I saw that I had much to learn and see to understand something bigger then i was. It’s a story, it’s my story. I had a moment this past fall on my trip with my father. We were driving through Switzerland and reached a point where we were at the center of the pass, we had reached the clouds, and some how in a divine way God met me at that spot, it was some clarity. My discovery to being discovered, life doesn't work that way. Had I had my way in my 20’s and 30’s I would not be surround by the love that fills me now. Id probably be a victim, at the time, I had no great support system around me, close to me, to hold my had through it, i may have been a “has been” and that was never the dream in my life So yes i believe in fate, divine fate. A reason and a time. Anxiety still gets the best of me at times, tunnels of darkness creeps in at times, and at times I need to be cracked over the head with a bat to wake me up and open my eyes to the blessings I have in front of me and the infinite power that has a plan for me at the right time in my history, my journey. I have learned to fall in love with this verse of wisdom, for me it has served as hope, Job 23:10, “But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold”. This last year has been one hell of a year. It’s been a journey. 3 surgery’s, a dip in a mid life crisis, a journey around the world with my father, be passed over for a major movie I lobbied for for 6 years, watch my commercial agent drop me only to see her book a lead on a hit show herself. Be told I was to old and had not enough experience for a job. We got positive answers about our daughters health. I helped my parents move from the bouts of hell to California (Missouri), having them be a part of our children lives and watch them grow, getting to hold my wife's hand and have her wipe my tears away when I feel like a failure and lost about my dreams, when she see’s me for me and celebrates my dreams. My two healthy children that I get to hold. If it wasn't for this journey I wouldn't be at this moment, right now. There is a reason, a path, a season, and a growing curve....There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heaven a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal,a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,a time to search and a time to give up a time to keep and a time to throw away,a time to tear and a time to mend,a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. I am blessed. thank you Sarah, Samuel, Sofia, Mom and Dad. thank you.

0 notes

girlwithsword · 7 years

Text

so i haven’t journaled in 2 weeks because i am a #mess and a lot of stuff has happened so i think broad summaries are more in order

basic themes: the summer, school, the next week, the house, ken, friends, family, my health

the summer: we had the group sicha for mosh madatz applicants and i had my interview with ari for the gilboa position, galil applications just came out

i don’t think i’m going to get mosh or gilboa - not ‘cause i’m not qualified, i am, but there just seems to be a lot of people more suited for that tafkid at those machanot than myself

galil is still open and idk as much what the landscape is like so it’s still a possibility, but idk what i’m going to to if i don’t get madatz madricha. i have been actively trying to separate what i want from the summer from the tafkid and i can’t do it.

Hannah and Sarah have made a proposal for a kvutzah messima based on leading nachshonimot and I’m down with that, but Hannah think that i could just go to Galil and be with their bogrimot and do that and maybe i could but a) that still wouldn;t give me the tzevet experience i’m looking for b) i wouldnt have the time or freedom to build a tochnit and c) i do NOT want to be the person coming in to the summer, especially as an outsider, demanding to be with certain kids! That person sucks!

I’ve talked to Hannah and to Bekah about it and im trying to talk to the mads but if i don’t get madatz madricha it’s really hard to justify going to a new machaneh to be on tzevet ragil to myself and my mother, not when there is SO MUCH theatre over the summer

anyway we just had a kvutzah call about it - Hannah, Jess and Toviah are applying for MBI! Sara and Ari are thinking about gesher! but sara still only wants to come for one session? arron fine is applying for madatz at miriam and maybe gilboa but idk?

i do have an idea, that maybe if i don’t get madatz, i stay in the city, work in theatre over the summer and spend my free time facilitating the kvutzah. like everyone gets so busy and hyper focused over kayitz and i could be an eye in the sky, keeping everyone updated, helping people with resource gathering and editing peulot - i could still be involved while not missing a summer of opportunities

school: so things are a lot more overwhelming than i want them to be

‘cause i had a bad week at the end of january i feel behind and i still haven;t totally caught up and it’s coming to mid-semester and that’s gonna catch up with me

monologue study is a lot more work than i expected - just doing all the xfript work is taking much longer than i planned for - i /just/ finished making the Lists yesterday and I’ve been working on that for WEEKS. Luckily, we don’t actually have class this week so all that stuff is due after the break - unluckily, i can’t really do work over the break and that shit needs to get done - more on that later

however, my actual piece is looking really good and some of the warm ups and breathing exercises have helped so much! two classes ago we did these breath exercises and then went around and each said a central line from our pieces and i have never been so in the moment and real and in my breath than right then and now i have had a taste and want that always

we’ll be starting shakespeare after the break and i want to try something new, I love my Beatrice, but there is something to be said for repertoire building. Rosanna suggested looking into Rosalind pieces from As You Like It and that’s promising. I might... try a Juliet? Like, idk if that’s worthwhile im just... not a Juiet, im never gonna be the ingenue, why try? but having something sweeter is definitely a goal, idk i looked at Rosalind pieces and i think there is something that catches my eye

scene study has a similar issue in that the written work is a lot more overwhelming and time consuming than i planned and that /is/ due next week so. however, rehearsals have been going AMAZING, we’re like 98% off book and have to focus on picking up the pace, sticking to tactics and not playing attitudes and getting the blocking a little more fine tuned.

we had dress rehearsals tuesday and it was a WRECK. /no one/ was off book, a couple scenes were just /stopped/ midway through and everyone was off. then we went up, the only group who didn;t even once call for a line and who was actually on top of our shit. i admit, it felt kinda good to be the best. though, the bar was kinda low.

I’m being mean, a lot of people had good moments and most of the scenes that derailed derailed ‘cause ONE particular person clearly didn;t have their shit together and it threw everyone off.

Brandon and i rehearsed today and got pacing a little more down and he’s gonna come over sunday and do a final rehearsal before tuesday’s presentation!!

my elective has been a lot less interesting than i was hoping for, the classes are kinda boring but at least it’s pretty easy. HOWEVER, we did a field trip to city hall yesterday and THAT was fascinating! we got to sit in on the city council sessions as they were deciding the budget and it was! so! cool! that’s the room where it fucking happens. and like, we should all be more on top of local politics ‘cause that’s where the day to day shit gets figured out. i did a whole snapchat rant about it it’s good

fevergraph isn’t technically school but it’s been going really well - i got to get some emotional stuff out through the journeys and i’ve gotten my heart rate up a few times, last class is next week and i think i’m gonna look into maybe some voice lessons for the next half of the semester?

anyway: sunday i need to get all my fucking scene work done, monday i should record all my notes for my TOR midterm ‘cause tuesday im running around a lot and i need to study for that. monologue stuff will have to wait - that’ll be wednesday/thursday, cause thursday afternoon... i’m getting on a plane to israel

so, that’s happening. i kinda was just.., thinking about it.. and then jazz said that if i went she would go with me.. and then my parents said they’d give me 300 for the trip as a bday present.. and then i booked tickets. we’re still figuring out exact details in terms of where we’re staying when but i’ve e-mailed mona and paul and talia and the mads about it and we’re figuring it out

so, yeah... that’s happening. we’re gonna chill and see people and go read on the beach and i’m going to where nothing but dressed the whole time and i’m so fucking excited.

in the meantime, this week i have to get all this fucking work done, my birthday is this weekend!! (there’s gonna be cupcakes and whiskey and an entire afternoon of theatre!!!!) and we need to shove in ten thousand roommate interviews in there sometime

‘cause YEAH, updates on Murnau House: we still haven;t found a new person for the Room That Cannot Be Filled which is Annoying and the previous occupant has not been as ontop of finding a replacement as he said he would so Sam is leading the search, bless her

aaaand our fridge broke last week, again, and we lost a BUNCH of food, but due to my skills of being a polite and efficient BITCH thanks to my mum, we got a new one pretty quickly and that’s going fine.

the ken: we had a tubshvat carnival two weeks ago, some bogrimot came and volunteered, it went fine, but i wasnt as invested as i should’ve been - however, i did see Iris there!! whcih was nice, she’s gonna be chinuch at shomiria this summer and she did the habo/hashi birthright! very cool

then, sem. so, we had a tzevet of 7 for 40 kids, two of whom lefton the saturday night. aaron and yehuda of all people were on mitbach and the post mbiers were a big help. the schedule pretty much went out the window becuase we didn’t even get in till after midnight in friday due to the storm.

i did however get an entire busload of kids off the bus, to a rest stop and back on to the bus in FIFTEEN MINUTES ‘cause i’m amazing, we went to camp and the kids had fun even tho it was very Emotional for me, and we re focused on The Krinkle Project for messima, and even tho we didn;t do the vaad stuff i hoped for, i think we can move forward if i get my shit together enough. we also did kvutzah peulot that, even if they didn’t go /so/ great, i think brought important ideas and next steps into a lot of the kids minds about how to be stronger as a kvtzot

there was gonna be a katkateam this weekend but ido and i are both on vaccations so that’s been cancelled. there;s a purim party on the 5th that might launch our participation in Krinkle if we get that together. Mifgash with Tavor in March, spring sem in May, maybe one final event for messima and then... we’re done. at least. I am. I’m done. And I should be expecting a cheque from Shaul any day now.

friends: sima is interning on a CTV show and getting updates on the PM’s schedule in her work e-mail, and graduating soon

julia is kind’ve her usual mess but also starting to turn a profit in selling her embroideries on etsy, but idk if she has like a plan of any kind? and that worries me to a degree

mikki’s cosplay stuff is BOOMING and she’s back with Lou but... she’s still being kinda self destructive and i’m worried about her??

josh just finished a show and i haven;t talked to him in a while....

anna grace and natty are putting on a show that natty wrote!

i don’t ... have that many friends??

family: same pretty much. Alex is migrating in a month, they’re moving a little closer to me than i like but what can you do.

Batsheva was here, we had one of our Talks, i need to find a more permanent therapist to go deeper with once school is done. i should probably join a group... but that im where im at for as young as i am considering everything... im honestly on a pretty good track

my health: so, i doubt anyone is reading at this point so... the weekend after my fatigue flare up at the start of the month i had a suicidal episode. and i’ve only told my therapist

it was my first one in about a year, my worst one in two and over the dumbest thing since highschool .... just being overwhelmed by school work

like, two mays ago i had a really bad one ‘cause i couldn’t get myself to finish my Buddies piece, a year ago i had a much smaller one ‘cause of a HUGE fight with my dad and this was just... being overwhelmed.

and that’s what;s frustrating!! i guess it was frustration at my body and i hadnt eaten that well and i was a day away fro my period and all that added up to curled into a ball trying desperately not to reach for a handful of my ciprilex and melatonin for most of that saturday??? which just like wtf

OTHER THAN THAT, my physical strength has actually been on an upswing since the start of the month and im feeling a lot more active. i have a cold this week but that’s just it being february and my immune system being shitty. thank god for cold 911

okay, it’s far too late. i gotta shower and sleep and this took about 10x longer than i planned for

it’s gonna be a hell of a week, and i have no idea when i can do this again, but wish me luck!

#my life today

0 notes