It is a beautiful day, and you are a horrible research transport vessel. Things are progressing as normal (i.e. it's boring) when a SecUnit pings you, lies right to your metaphorical face, and then tries to bribe you with human media to give it a ride. This is as unexpected as it is unprecedented, and the sheer nerve of it is really to be admired. There's no protocol to this, so what should you do?
Now, this is against a bunch of rules, and could be dangerous if you weren't so impressive and incredible, and you're technically an employee (and can probably rewrite the Univeristy charter at will (until someone notices and puts it back)) so those rules are for other entities.
So, what you should do is allow the rogue SecUnit with a broken governor module and a sketchy story aboard. If you check the files it dumps and find zero (0) malware (which is confusing), and it doesn't even try to trash the place or lay in wait to ambush a crew member, then you've got a good candidate!
Next, what you're going to want to do is absolutely nothing. Just watch it patrol your halls until it's time to leave. Continue staring at it while you're undergoing embarkment procedures. Maybe analyze it a little (you've got plenty of processing power to spare) when it finally sits down and starts watching media. Allow it to settle in and get comfortable while you stare at it and get further and further from port.
Now that you two are alone (intimacy is key!) and you've determined that watching media is all the SecUnit is going to do, it's time to make contact! Make sure to open by telling it it's only survived due to dumb luck, and letting it know you could melt its brain into putty. This starter will work to develop conversation naturally and smoothly, just like you've seen the humans do, and it will be smooth sailing from there!
This has been Perihelion's guide to making friends/finding life partners/fuck off Holism I had to work hard for this find your own
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Sora in NEO:TWEWY clothes I've put him in (so far)
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[ID: A digital line drawing of Caleb Widogast and Vax'ildan from Critical Role. Caleb is drawn with wrinkles and he's saying "Okay babe I'm getting old, time for you to move on." Text underneath what Caleb says reads (Essek does not want to move on while Caleb is still ALIVE). Vax'ildan is drawn with the raven skull mask he wears as the Champion of the Matron of Ravens and he is holding his left hand up in a peace sign. Text above him reads "been dead for 30 years and still sending ravens" and below that (Keyleth can't move on) is written. End description.]
They both suck at this (affectionate)
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🏳️⚧️ DOUBLE HEADCANON ATTACK!!! 🏳️⚧️
Family HCs are already fun on their own but with transness added on they're even better. It's actual comedy gold. Also I've always wanted to draw some kind of Meta Knight VS Galacta Knight type thing, but I can't take anything seriously like that. So you get This.
What This is, is a way too high effort shitpost. It took a combined 2 and a half? Days, though most of it was just sketching. I'm proud of it! Anything for the bit.
Textless version + unfinished doodle under the cut
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Deep Underground
Also on Twitter | I HAD THIS IDEA FOR A LONG TIME
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