#i'm having a time figuring out the dynamics between the (growing) cast of this story but i do think

[ghostwise]

Overgrown for the prompts?

She finds him in the orchard, among the flies, mold, and rotting fruit.

The sickly sweet odor of a thousand dead plums is an assault on her senses. Leonor reels back, dizzied. Nobody has tended to the orchards at Quinta de Talpa. For years they have been left to grow wild, an interruption of the ecosystem, sucking up all the water and nutrients in the soil yet feeding no one. A space dedicated to nothing more than decay.

It feels appropriate.

She has been thinking about her and Rinna’s situation. They came here looking for an escape, but lately it feels like a dead end. What once seemed like a promising start has become much like this orchard; untenable and stagnant.

By the time Mahariel reaches her she is miserable, looking at him as if he were the very cause of everything wrong in her life. It’s not too far from the truth.

“I wish you’d never come here,” she says, too angry to try and be clever with him.

Hamal looks at her, impassive and silent. His eyes shake in their usual unsteady tic, too blue to be real, strange and unsettling, but he’s listening. Most of their conversations involve him listening.

“You really fucked things up for me!” Leonor continues. “So many years trying to keep her safe and now we have a diplomatic incident on our hands because of you and your shit husband-”

“’Diplomatic’—what?” Hamal asks. Her tone combined with a reference to Zevran catches his attention, and his expression falls into a half-hearted glare. “I do not understand. What did you say about my husband?”

His Antivan is still not very good. He understands about half of what she says to him, but he knows just enough to be a real pain in the ass when he’s up to the effort of conversing. Frustrated, Leonor reaches into her pockets and produces a letter, written on good parchment, with an ornate seal.

“Who the fuck,” she begins, exasperated, “is writing to you from Orlais?” The paper crumples as she hits it for emphasis, startling him. “The fucking Left Hand of the Divine! Are you serious? How does she know you are here? Why does she even care?”

Hamal’s eyes follow the letter and he seems genuinely taken aback. “I… I do not know-”

“Read it!” She shoves the paper into his hands and takes out a dagger for good measure. “Out loud!”

Hamal glances at the letter, then at her weapon.

“Read!”

“Ya, ya, calma,” he says, unworried. “One moment. Thank you.”

Leonor is no Templar, no guard and no soldier. She watches him read in utter silence, and runs her hand through her curls, giving them a desperate tug. Finally, feeling that she might have been a tad hasty, she puts the knife away.

“Well? What does it say?” she asks.

It says she is overstepping, as usual, Hamal thinks.

Leliana, it seems, has done well for herself since the Blight. Truth be told, he is not too pleased by the letter in his hands. While most would think no news is good news, Leliana has taken it upon herself to spend time and resources tracking them down.

Hamal sighs and closes his eyes, aware of Leonor still watching him. He wishes Zevran was here to discuss this. How troubling.

“She is a friend from Ferelden,” he explains, and tries desperately to think of how to spin this in their favor. He struggles a bit with the next part. “Me ayudó… con… cuando… uhm...”

Waving a hand through the air, he brings it down in a swoop of wings.

“Raar, raar. Demonio. The Archdemon. She helped us end the Blight.”

“The Left Hand of the Divine helped you defeat the Archdemon,” Leonor repeats, and she sinks to the ground in a moody crouch. “Of course. And I suppose she and Zevran are the best of friends.”

“Yes. Friends.” Hamal forms a little twist with his fingers. “Leliana and Zevran. She wants to see us.”

“Then maybe you should go.”

Leonor covers her eyes, mortified. The Divine’s Left Hand! An army of Chantry forces will surely follow. They’ll find a decrepit estate, full of falsified documents, blood magic, assassins, apostates, tax evasion! What will become of Rinnala then, when she is no longer at her side?

Contentious relationship aside, Hamal does sympathize. He knows enough about Leonor to understand that her freedom was hard-won, and that her concerns for Rinnala mirror his own feelings toward Zevran. He steps closer, carefully, and kneels beside her.

“Rinnala does not want us to go,” he says slowly. “She has to decide. Zevran will wait for her to ask him to leave.”

Abruptly, he continues in his native language, something she vaguely recognizes as that curious Coastal Fereldan Elvhen. Different from the way the Antivan Dalish speak.

“I will write Leliana,” he says, holding a palm out and scribbling on it with his finger. “I will tell her we are well and correspond with her accordingly. I will tell her not to come. Que no venga.”

He wags a finger ‘no’.

“Zevran will agree with this plan. No Chantry forces will come to Quinta de Talpa. No Templars will ever chain you again.”

And they’ve squabbled with each other enough in these past months to have built a little bridge all their own. Some understanding, past the language barrier, past the distrust, allows her to grasp his meaning. Leonor puzzles out what he’s saying, unable to believe him, but tempted by the offer.

“Alright… alright,” she says finally. “But we are to read every letter you send. Do not try anything underhanded!”

Hamal nods. “Nothing bad. Promise.”

Leonor scoffs and pulls herself up, grasping him by the shoulder.

“Let’s go. It smells awful. Why are you even out here?”

“There are animals in the orchard,” Hamal says idly. “I was setting traps.”

“Animals?”

“Little ones. They eat the plums. Ah, hm… they go like this.” Unable to describe them, he holds out a hand and makes little motions with his fingers, like a creature scurrying. Then he bunches it up into a fist, as if the creature were curling up.

“Armadillos?” Leonor asks.

Hamal shrugs. A curious moment of peace transpires. The entire conversation has his mind spinning.

“This will work,” he tells her, glancing at her warily, “but not forever. Leliana is not the only one who will come. One day, Rinnala has to let us leave. You promise me.”

“Buddy,” Leonor sighs, “if it were up to me, you would already be gone.”

[findafight]

I haven’t finished the series yet (I keep having to tap out because the writers keep referring back to episodes that they think they’ve written rather episodes that I actually watched), but I think the big disconnect between their writers and the audience have with regard to Steve is that the show *insists* on treating Steve’s character development as if it’s a “Redemption Arc”, when it is in fact a fairly standard coming-of-age story.

He starts season one coasting through an almost cookie-cutter existence, moulded by the people that he hangs out with. By season four, he’s the lone jock in a group of nerds and geeks of all stripes (Lucas is getting in there though) and has found his soulmate in a weird theatre kid (whose love life he’s arguably more invested in than his own). He has his own tastes and interests, but he’s open to those of his friends as well. He’s the unofficial “adult” of the group and has a leadership position, not because an adult has left him in charge, but because again and again he chooses to take responsibility for The Party’s safety.

[Side note - the way Steve chooses over and over to take responsibility, above and beyond what was asked of him, leading to him being more comfortable in his own skin and sure of who he is VS Jonathan having responsibility thrust upon him at such a formative age that he starts to experience an identity crisis in season four as they’re stripped away from him.

Just. Why didn’t these two have more of a relationship onscreen? Why does this show do so *little* to explore how Jonathan feels about his parentification? Or the ways in which this has hurt him over the years? W H Y ?]

As you’ve pointed out elsewhere(?), the worst of Steve’s actions in season one are the result of him lashing out in anger. But he’s shown to regret these actions, and takes ownership and responsibility of them in a way that feels genuine. Jon and Nancy aren’t there to see him help clean up the graffiti; he didn’t know that Nancy was there when he went to apologise to Jonathan; as far as we know Jonathan still doesn’t know that Steve is the one who replaced his camera.

They didn’t write a stock Stephen King bully - they wrote a male, messier version of Cher Horowitz.

yes! all of this!!

Steve's just a guy who was sort of a shitty teenager but then made the conscious choice to Do Better. He just wanted to apologize! Make things right! and that seemed to lead into making sure his town isn't infested by monsters and that a group of annoying thirteen year olds don't die also doing that. And yet they try to tell us he was a giant mean bully.

honestly I'm going to put the lack of character interaction and development (especially with a cast of the size Stranger things has) on Netflix. If they could have a regular season or even a 12-15 episode season a lot of the inconsistencies and dropped character elements and explore dynamics way more.

Jonathan being thrust into responsibility when Steve actively chose it!!! makes me scream!!! Jonathan needing to figure out who he is, but at the same time not wanting to and avoiding it, while Steve had to figure that out before. Steve might be a bit directionless, but he knows who he is. Jonathan at least thinks he knows what he wants at first but he doesn't know who he is outside of his family. Especially now that Will is growing up and not needing him the same way as before. I think him and steve interacting would be so interesting and i WISH they let us see something other than animosity or ignoring each other. They've got similarities but are soooo different. Just. AHHHhh many thoughtssss

[dipplinduo]

Scrapped Content for The Dichotomy In Our Hearts

Where have I been? Ah. Well. Would you believe me if I told you I have been writing and rewriting the same chapter across this past like...week? xD

I have been working through a series of ideas for chapter updates, but I've been very very stuck on The Dichotomy In Our Hearts.

When I tell you. I have written this one scene. OVER AND OVER. LOOOOL.

Ultimately, I've realized the voice of DIOH comes from a sweeter/reflective/"grow through growing pains" kind of tone. Not as much of a conflict-driven/angsty/"Kieran can you please chill the edge bc you're lowkey toxic chain'd" one, like with what you might see me write in Sweet & Sour Dipplins. And lemme tell you, it feels sooooo good to have this breakthrough, because one thing I've been actively trying to do with DIOH is distinguish it from S&S D across the board (but especially with Kieran & Juliana's characterizations & dynamics).

So that being said, I'm gonna rework the last two chapters. I was originally going to have them come out as part of a bigger update in general, but if you've been following this story you've honestly waited long enough, lol. So! I'm prioritizing this. Next update from me will come out within a few days with the conclusion of this story. <3 In the meantime, I figured I should share some of the scrapped work I had - it's a good scene on its own, but you'll see a different version of this scene play out in a more effective way within Chapter 4. :)

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Kieran huffed out a breath of the furious storm that had festered inside of him. He had hoped his time decompressing in the frosty woods would freeze over the raw cut to his already withering pride, but it proved to no avail as he walked along the cobblestone pathway to his home. He relished in what remained of the short-lived comfort he obtained through casting himself to the shadows as his home’s lingering lights began to expose his wounds back to the watching world. The rays were an anomaly for this time of night; his grandfather had always had a strict rule of dimming the house before bed, and Kieran was highly certain it was too late for people to be awake. 

He braced himself with a careful inhale as he quietly stepped up to the shoji before him, and the door felt like a paper barrier between the last of his solitude and judgment itself. They couldn’t have been waiting up to lecture him some more, could they? At this point, he didn’t need any punishment beyond the torment of his self-criticism. He knew he was rash and reckless. He knew he was lucky the little boy was okay. 

He just wished he was better. It was another moment he could’ve used to prove himself, but he blew it. Again.

 The guilt already gripped into him mercilessly. It seemed as if the history of his inexcusable failures enjoyed repeating themselves - no matter how hard he tried to remedy them by pushing himself - and it seemed as if the world would do anything but retire the spotlight from him while he dug his grave further into the lifeless ground. The real salt in the wound was the dramatic irony of how he had failed this time, though. 

Once again, his efforts were fruitless. Once again, Juliana had stepped in so effortlessly. Once again, she is showered in praise while he is showered in shame. 

And of course she bore witness to his humiliation.

Kieran clenched his jaw tightly as he slid the shoji. He remained stealthy, but still nonetheless moved swiftly to rip the band-aid off to whatever awaited him indoors. He squinted his sensitive eyes against the blaring, toasty lights - they were more powerful than what had seeped through to the front porch - and the illuminance from the lamps refracted warm hues off of the yellow-orange walls. Minus the scattered lights, the house was void of his noisy family members. They must’ve all retreated to their beds as Kieran would reasonably predict.  As Kieran’s vision adjusted to his bright and tidy home, his movements slowed to the sight before him. He stepped inside in a manner that was as Dedenne as he attempted to survey the situation.

Juliana was curled up against the kotatsu in an awkward position - one that looked far from comfortable. It appeared as if she had fallen asleep entirely by accident; she had donned her usual attire instead of the pajamas she was meant to borrow, and she was sitting up rather than lying down into the kotatsu’s blanket that poorly covered her lap. Her back was hunched over so she could rest her cheek against her forearms, which were somewhat sprawled along the wooden surface of the kotatsu. Her Deerling-like eyes remained sealed shut as Keiran inched closer, and there was a subtle droop in her parted jaw as she softly breathed. Odd touches of flyaways and frizz decorated her waved, somewhat messy hair, and Kieran noted slight creases that wrinkled in a hidden gray underneath her eyes. 

Was she waiting up for him? 

It was yet another moment that felt stolen and improper. When he observed her, he could see nothing but a much more vulnerable aspect of his rival that he felt he wasn’t meant to experience.

It was yet another moment that felt stolen and improper. When he observed her, he could see nothing but a much more vulnerable aspect of his rival that he felt he wasn’t meant to experience. She was supposed to be unyielding and ruthless with limitless capabilities. An obstacle in his path that he could overcome to clear his conscience.

Kieran bit the corner of his lip and exhaled slowly - the bewildering tugs of emotions on either end only added to his already building frustration. He quietly snagged the patchworked, quilted blanket that was draped along the plush sofa nearby her - why she couldn’t just resign herself on that at the minimum, Kieran didn’t know - and carefully wrapped it around her narrow shoulders. As he turned to leave, a gentle touch around some of his fingers caused him to gasp. 

“Ki…Ki-”

Kieran’s mouth suddenly felt dry as his heart skipped a beat. 

“-eran,” Juliana finished, and the weird sensation in his chest rallied heat around him. Why was he imagining she would call him…?

The touch around his middle and ring finger became a soft grip as Juliana stirred and began rubbing her face. Now that she was awake, reality struck him back into his senses and he suddenly felt as restless as he was in the woods. 

Kieran tried to keep his voice even as he spoke. "Juliana, it's late. Ya’ should go to bed," 

Juliana blinked sleepily as she sat up, still holding his hand. "I was worried about you," she murmurs. "Are you okay?"

Kieran nearly pulled his hand away as the realization dawned on him. So this was what it was all about: pity.

She was the hero who looked down on him and pitied him before anything else.

The epiphany was a coarse grain of salt rubbing in his wounds, but it was somehow the easiest and most sensible thing to believe than any lingering alternatives. "Why do you care so much?" he snapped, immediately regretting his harsh tone but feeling unable to stop himself. "You don't need to pretend to be worried about me."

Juliana flinched as she became more alert. “Why would I pretend to be worried?”

“Don’t play dumb,” Kieran spat as he snatched his hand away. 

“Why are you trying to pick a fight with me?” Juliana asked firmly as she rose, a hint of anxiety in her defensiveness. “Is this about Peacharunt?”

“It’s about way more than that.” Kieran tightened his fists as he steadied his gaze on a chair cushion, readying his words like canons. “You won again. Ya’ always do. I don’t need your pity as a consolation prize.” 

“I’m not trying to pity you,” Juliana countered. “I just know that things have been hard lately, and I-”

Kieran turned to face her, his voice almost trembling as the pain in her face brought out some of his own. “That’s why ya’ came here in the first place, right? I just mess everything up left and right. Ya’ just want ta’ keep an eye on me and fix my mistakes. ‘Cause I’m so horrible.”

Juliana stepped closer and spoke softly enough to make the hair behind Kieran’s neck raise. “Kieran, you’re not horrible at all. But you’re acting like you are, and you keep pushing people away. You’re pushing me away.”

Juliana’s cries fell on deaf ears as the anger flared inside of Kieran, directionless. An ugly mix of self-loathing, resentment, and deep-seeded insecurity oozed uncontrollably as he spat out his words. "Stop beatin’ around the bush, everyone knows that I can't ever measure up to you!” His voice cracked with the weight of his emotions, and he turned away again, unable to face her and complete his thought. How even his own grandparents trusted her battle skills over his.

“This isn’t a competition. I’m not trying to compete with you,” Juliana breathed unevenly, as if there was something unsteady brewing in her.

Kieran's eyes narrowed, his frustration boiling over. "Ya’ think it's not a competition? It's always a competition! Everyone is always comparing us, and I always come up short. Do ya’ even know what that's like?” Kieran continued as Juliana opened her mouth in protest. “Ya’ don’t. ‘Cause you’re always the hero everyone wants and loves. You are perfect,” Kieran spat as an insult as he ran out of breath. 

A pulsating surge of shock struck Kieran as his rival’s voice grew uncharacteristically intense. "You think I'm perfect? You think I don’t have struggles? That I don’t actually care about you at all?” Her voice cracked before becoming small and hushed. “How could you say such a thing?”

His eyes danced between hers in anguish, and he messily attempted to somewhat soften his outburst as he recalled her smile under the fireworks. “If you had any flaws they’d just be a work of art.” (MAKE CONTRADICTION MORE FLUID)

“I thought you of all people would know that I'm anything but perfect!” Juliana cried out, tears bursting down her face. “After everything you’ve seen me struggle with.”

As he witnessed the seams of her composure become undone, Kieran felt as if he was sinking, too. The tension in his fists released as he was taken aback, rendered speechless. 

Juliana continued to fall apart before him, using both of her hands to wipe her face repeatedly as her voice trembled. “I don’t fit in at the academy. I miss being at home. And the only person that really feels like a home is the one person I’m pitted against. You’ve seen me fail over and over again with all of these things. You’ve seen parts of me I haven’t shown anyone else. But you... you act like I’m this flawless person who just waltzes through life without a care. And it hurts, Kieran. It hurts because I care about you so much, and you don’t even see it.”

Kieran’s eyes widened as he was hit with a sudden sense of clarity. He began to blink rapidly as he recalled the intimacy and affection he had misread as a threat. Her giddiness, her eagerness to accompany him and cling to him, her interest in his thoughts and moods. A tingle ruptured inside him as he pieced everything together. 

She…liked him? 

It felt like a haughty deduction, but it was the only way he could make sense of such strong feelings. He wasn’t sure what to make of it - what he was even supposed to do with it. Kieran hesitantly reached out an arm around the shaking girl’s back and nudged her forward. His hyperawareness grew as she collapsed into him as she sobbed, curling her fingernails around arms. It felt as she was slipping down, and Kieran unintentionally dropped to the floor with her as she buried herself against him. 

It was a moment he was entirely unprepared for and could never predict. There was a part of him that felt good - as if his damaged ego was stroked and given value. There was another that raved about the attention he was receiving, to have someone fight because they cared. There was another part that was disgusted at himself for those feelings. There was another that couldn’t make sense of Juliana and her multidimensionality. Was he wrong about her? Does he have the right to be mad at her? Is he even mad at her? Why would she have a crush on him, if she even did? Kieran felt as if he was short-circuiting from the swirling contemplation. 

He was ages away from speaking as Juliana continued to blubber. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do! I don’t know how to make up for what happened with Ogerpon! And it breaks my heart to keep seeing you get so angry without knowing how to fix it!” 

"Juliana, I..." he starts, staring aimlessly at the wall behind her as his voice trails off. “I didn’t realize…” 

"Of course you didn't," she weakly replies against him to the point where it was difficult to hear. "You're too busy seeing me as this perfect person who has it all together, like everyone else. Well, I'm not. And it hurts, Kieran. It hurts.” She repeated, nearly nonsensical.

(Below are notes that follow the direction of the scene):

Kieran feels guilty and hugs Juliana awkwardly

I'm sorry/angry at self / feels disarmed by Juliana's crying

His thoughts eventually grow quiet as she sags further against him and nearly falls asleep 

“We should both go to bed” wanted to escape but didn't want to leave, conflicted 

(J) I’m sorry if I was being too much

(K): Thats the second time you said that/improved ability to observe Juliana

Was she afraid of taking up space? Starts to see how difficult that must be

Closes door abruptly, holds his hands to his face where Juliana touched him

~EMBARRASSED EMO ~ / Reflection on duality of relationship

[wherevenusholdssomeofficespace]

So Doof in Milo Murphy's Law?

In general, I think Doof was as funny as he always was. He's just a disaster of a man with few social skills. He sometimes seems a bit more annoying or inconsiderate than he used to be, though I'm pretty sure the reason for this is Doof in Phineas and Ferb hardly interacts with anyone but Perry, who doesn't talk, mostly in his apartment where his behavior doesn't really bother anyone else. Doof DOES have a full fledged supporting cast so to speak (Vanessa, Norm, Charlene, Roger, OWCA, LOVE MUFFIN), but their interactions often just set up an episode or close out an episode. Not to say he doesn't have storylines where he interacts with other characters, and Norm is around often, but that's not where he spends his time. And those characters he does interact with are usually foiled to him in some notable way. I think the only human characters he interacts with for more than a few lines at a time with are Major Monogram (who is a "good" guy but a bit of an asshole, who has a natural chemistry than , Rodney, who often specifically riles Doof up, and Vanessa whose issues with her dad is central to many of her stories and has a lot of patience for him. And the kids on occasion, where I think we see many of the same problems of his Milo Murphy's Law presence. Where he's basically the kids peer and is often called out for his ridiculousness, and irritates a lot of people. There are characters Doof bounces off wonderfully and characters he just doesn't. Orton Mahson, yes. Sara, Not so much.

It's just that in MML, he's regularly interacting with people so his inability to function is affecting people beyond his immediate family. It's a bit less funny when he's actually interacting with people who don't deserve the problems he's causing. Or who aren't on some level, obligated to deal with it. His behavior is just constant Agent Doof/At2D behavior, but its now directed at characters who shouldn't have to put up with his nonsense. And it's also a little bit Doof is in a context different than the one we saw him than during PnF. He's not as certain about who he is. He's lacking a solid goal. Despite sounding like I'm complaining, I don't really mind all that so to speak. I mean, he was pretty good in the Phineas and Ferb effect in my opinion precisely because he had Orton Mahlson and Cavendish to bounce off of. Doof's still funny, he's still got heart. But I think it just makes the actual problem worse.

Which is that it split S2's focus. S1 heavily focused on Milo and friends, with the pistachio stuff mostly going on in the background until it became actually important. 2 plot lines (not unlike PnF). But Season 2 added a third arc in addition to the Alien arc that replaced the time travel arc, Doof's professor time arc. And while it paralleled Cavendish and Dakota's, it still took up time. I didn't really dislike any of it per se. But it was taking significant time away from Milo, and to a certain extent the dynamics we could have between Milo characters. I don't necessarily have a problem with the episodes, its just between Milo and Gang, Cavendish's escapades, Doof was just too much. We know (due to all the failed backdoor pilots in PnF S4), that they wanted to continue Doof's story. Between Doof 101 and the OWCA Files, they were clearly been thinking about a Doof who is figuring out how to be good for a while. And Doof, DID have room to grow. I do completely agree with giving Doof an arc. But ultimately Doof is a character who is far more funny when he's diluted by other shenanigans, or has good people to bounce off, and Milo's less erratic formula didn't dilute him too much. What I mean by that is we didn't have B (and C) plots the way we did in Phineas. I LOVE Doof, let me make that clear, he was always a delight, but I think I speak for most of us when I say I didn't love Doof enough to give up limited Milo time for him.

Phineas and Ferb had like 65 episodes in its first two seasons alone while Milo Murphy's Law had 40 episodes total. And Doof was a main character in at least 8 segments. Which may not sound like a lot, but half of those episodes didn't feature Milo. He also featured as a major character in several others. And unlike PnF where most segments were shared with the Flynn-Fletcher's escapades, when Doof gets a segment, he's often its sole focus. I genuinely think cutting down a few of the more repetitive Doof episodes or giving them Milo centric B-plots could have done a world of good. That said, I just don't care that much about Doof's middle aged drama compared to the kids shenanigans.

So ultimately I have extremely mixed feelings on it. I do love Doof. Him being professor time and Cavendish's hero, Cavenpuss, his role in helping the kids with the aliens. All great. But I admit. I don't watch the episodes featuring him nearly as much as I do the ones that are just about him and Perry's drama. I think it was something Dan and Swampy cared about. And I respect that. I get it. I could never hate it. But Milo and his friends are great characters who easily can carry half a show, and their extended cast are incredibly engaging. Between the rest of the Murphy family and the rest of the middle school there was plenty of story opportunities. Not to mention Melissa and Zack's families (we never meet Zack's younger siblings, despite their existence being confirmed). I think we all wanted to see something new.

I think none of the episodes featuring Doof were particularly bad but they all together did felt a bit repetitive when the unexplored potential of Milo was right there. I enjoyed Doof's presence in pretty much any episode where Milo and his friends also played a role, because his presence felt beneficial to the story. I liked Doof in the finale for example. But I also can't help but feel that I would have rather had characters like Amanda and Sara in it, characters who were a lot more relevant to Milo, even if Doof was a delight. But when Milo dipped out of an episode to focus on Doof that was a huge problem.

And usually I love episodes which let's us explore new dynamics. And let's make it clear, I like Adventure Buddies. But did we really need it. Maybe if Milo got another season. Because that seems like the exact kind of episode that would have come out of season 3 or 4 of Phineas and Ferb, when they had already worked through a lot of the more expected combinations and started experimenting with weirder stuff. That's when we started getting, all the AU versions of the gang, the episodes that shuffled up the cast and status quo in more unusual ways, and while those are some of my favorite episodes, I feel they only worked because of how much we already had.

There are definitely a few episodes I would cut, or at least would have demoted to B plots of some other episode. But ultimately, Doof's journey was clearly a story they so desperately wanted to tell, and he is, for the most part, a delight. I can't imagine cutting him out of Milo Season 2 altogether. It's such an important piece of Doof lore that I would hate to lose. But I mourn the loss of Milo (and Cavendish and Dakota) episodes even more. I really do have mixed feelings about it. And I can only hope that Milo & co make their way into the new PnF seasons.

[triviareads]

ARC Review of When the Duke Loved Me by Lydia Lloyd

Summary:

Catherine Forster was ruined by John Breminster, Duke of Edington a decade ago, and thanks to the enmity between their families, he refused to marry her. Now, a decade later, Catherine is a penniless spinster, and John is on her doorstep, asking for her for her help with a sensitive matter that concerns the scandal that occurred between their families years ago...

My review:

This is Lydia Lloyd's debut novel, and I thought she did a great job of writing main characters who were individually sympathetic and dynamic together, as well as an overarching mystery plot that kept me on my toes the entire time.

A lot of the plot is centered around the enmity between the Breminsters and the Forsters. About a decade before the prologue starts, John's father Reginald and Catherine's Aunt Mary (who raised her) were caught in flagrante and the fallout meant financial and reputational ruin for Catherine and her family, as well as John's family being torn apart. Now, John's father is dead and he's left behind an annuity that Mary must accept, or it will spell social ruin for John's sister. The problem is, Mary's disappeared and John is convinced Catherine can help him find her.

Catherine is a heroine who's reduced to some pretty dire circumstances (girlie literally has the residents of her household faking the plague to avoid debt collectors), so she's scrappy and realistic enough to go along with John's scheme without much fuss. John is presented as something of a feckless rake (with rake friends who I hope get their own stories), but we see the hidden, more caring side to him soon enough.

What's interesting is, between the ruination from a decade prior, as well as John initially casting aspersions on Catherine's morality ("a spinster can't kiss as well as YOU did"), you would think they have an uphill battle to even tolerate one another, but they didn't. I thought it was refreshing that despite everything, they don't bother to deny their mutual attraction right from the get-go. They grow to care for one another along the way (this is definitely a case of sex helping their relationship grow, and sex is their form of communication), and it's fairly smooth sailing all things considered. Really, the greater conflict(s) are how they individually grapple with the complicated relationships between them and their respective parental figures.

This relative lack of tension until the end also makes the climax more poignant, when Catherine is faced with the choice to break off their engagement and leave, or be forced to keep secrets from John, which she can't bring herself to do because of how much she loves and cares for him.

The mysterious relationship between Reginald and Mary serves as a compelling backdrop. For one, there are a lot of parallels between them and John/Catherine (like I think John tries to fuck Catherine on the same desk he caught them on when he was younger lol). They ultimately served as a warning for the main couple for how not to proceed with their relationship.

The sex:

The overall sex vibes in this book can probably be best described as "down and ready any time, anywhere". Delving into the specific, I'm shameless enough to say I'm all for an instant gratification moment and Lydia delivered with the beginning "ruination" scene... set in the middle of ruins at that. And the ramifications even a decade later are pretty damn hilarious: At some point John admits to Catherine that he couldn't get off unless he was thinking about her to which my reactions in order were a) GASP b) *cackles* c) wait.... this is actually romantic?

There's also a great dry-humping scene pretty early on which honestly might have been hotter than the actual sex? It starts with him telling her he wants to suck ink off her fingers, and ends with him high-tailing out of there with a Boner of Shame and Guilt (we love a selfless man) so I was 100% entertained the whole time.

Overall:

If you enjoy a your historical romances with a side of mystery, then this is the book for you. I loved the easy chemistry between the main couple and how they slowly unraveled the truth of the past. This is a fantastic debut for Lydia Lloyd, and I look forward to future books in this series.

Thank you to Tule Publishing and NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for my review.

[thecagedsong]

You said you stopped watching MLB because of how Chat was treated; I'm curious what you meant?

Chat is supposed to be Ladybug's equal. Hawkmoth needs both to handle his wish. They are supposed to be Yin and Yang. Creation and destruction. Tikii and Plagg. The only one truly able to stop the cat is the ladybug, the only one that can mess up the ladybug is the cat. They halt each other in opposition.

Working together they are unstoppable as the union of opposites, internal and external balance, and maybe an acknowledgement of the power of friendship superseding our differences in power types and personalities and being the force that lets them accomplish everything, since this is a kids show.

Visually, based on their outfit and color scheme, in costume and out of costume, this is their theme. Personality, this fits too, when you compare their social skills in different situations.

That's the theme that is supposed to guide the story every time they are on screen, we're being told that that is the theme.

That's not what the story does. Ladybug is clearly stronger than Chat. Even in the future, Chat's the joke that accidentally cataclysms other miraculuses, causes problems, and is a nuisance no one wants to see. Marinette is the competent leader who's going to achieve her goals no matter what! She's the leader that holds all the secrets, gives all the instructions, breaks down under the pressure, but she gets stronger so it's okay! She can know everyone's identity but Chat's, because she's the best and the greatest, and we all know Chat's going to fall under mind control next week because he's a screwup, so it's totally justified right?

NO. You had such cool and important themes that could have helped turn the work into something truly great.

No one in universe, except for Plagg, cares about Chat. If it's between Adrien and Marinette, everyone but Chloe is going to pick Marinette. If it's ladybug verse chat? Everyone is going to pick ladybug. And Ladybug, the so called hero that's supposed to be his partner, talks down to him too while worshipping Adrein, who is also clearly not alright.

If they tried to use this to play into the themes of the differences between the miraculous, maybe I could get past it. Develop Chat into a lone wolf type that ladybug trusts to strike on his own while she's handling the team attacks. But Chat loves Ladybug and desperately wants friends, so they should have been developing him into a co-leadership position to emphasize the equality between them.

Instead he's still a goof that's needlessly suffering because no one trusts him/loves him, and thus delaying the plot exponentially because Hawkmoth is literally living in his house. You may argue that that changes later, but it was too much for me.

I've also come to realize that what's fun about 'monster of the week' type shows is the new cast and situations you get each week. (Note the times they do do this in the show, those make the best episodes) Scooby-doo, you have a new haunted cellar/house/lab/underground tunnel system each with, with a new cast for the who-dun-it with a mix of personal motivations that the characters jump right into and have to figure out. Sailormoon? Usagi discovered new parts of her hometown, learned about gyms and festivals and sports, and putting on plays and artist galleries, each time exploring a new character that has a life of their own and separate passions, which mirrored the themes of growing up and realizing just how different and amazing the world is now that you're old enough to start exploring it. The 3D modeling medium severely limits the new cast you can introduce, which would be fine if they were willing to develop the characters more, specifically within the themes and show marked progression in the dynamics with each other, but they aren't.

So I feel betrayed by the discarded themes as shown by the unequal treatment of Chat which unnecessarily causes him suffering and I'm bored by the uninteresting cast that can neither truly change composition or develop as characters/people.

[glitterdustcyclops]

Ten Fave Characters from Ten Fandoms

I started this post years ago and gave up halfway through, but I thought it would be interesting to revisit it. To see if my thoughts had changed since then, and to add in some new fandoms I've been into. The thing is, I've always struggled to pick my Single Favorite Character in any given media, because I am a total sucker for a good ensemble cast, and most of the time I'm more interested in the dynamics of the different relationships between characters than I am in the individual characters themselves. But you know, I do still have my blorbos, same as everyone else. So here are ten of them, from ten different fandoms, in no particular order (with a general warning that there will be spoilers):

1. Steven (Steven universe)

My son, my muffin, light of my life, best boy!! Honestly, how could I not put him first? Steven Universe is and always will be It™ for me, My Thing, and I could probably write essays for days (and in fact, I have) about the themes, characters, story arcs, design, music, everything to do with this fucking show. And while I love literally everyone in Beach City to bits, you know I gotta give a special shout out to our boy Steven. Watching him grow up over the years was a genuine delight, and the conclusion of his arc being a pretty obvious transgender acceptance allegory at the exact same time I was coming to accept my own trans identity was an extra special treat on top. It will never stop blowing my socks clean off just how revolutionary a character like Steven was at the time (and shamefully, continues to be), especially in media aimed at young kids. A boy hero whose strength and power comes from his empathy, from his kindness, from the women in his life. He is literally surrounded by a team of powerful alien warrior women, descended from the Princess of Alien Space Rock Royalty, and never once does the narrative even slightly question the fact that he idolizes the women in his life. Steven fights with a rose-colored shield and loves singing and laughing and his big sisters and love, and his whole arc was about learning how to take these feminine influences and come into his own power with them, to be the kind of hero he wanted to be. At the end of the day, no matter what else Steven was, he was above all himself. And he was loved for it, completely, unreservedly, without question. How fucking magical is that? (And thank god we finally got him some therapy, this poor lil muffin).

2. Donna Noble (Doctor Who)

Best companion 5ever, fite me. I love Donna for so many reasons, but most of all I love her relationship with Ten, which is easily one of my top five brotps of all time. She challenged him and snarked at him and dared him to be better, and he tried his hardest to do it, because he wanted to be worthy of her companionship. And they were just so good together!!! Ahhh!!!!! Donna Noble was introduced as a rather abrasive figure, loud and sarcastic without apology in a way female characters frequently aren’t allowed to be, especially in the dark times of the late 2000s. But she was also shown to be really deeply kind, overflowing with empathy for all of the people and creatures around her. And not only that, but she was quite literally the Most Important Woman in the Universe because of it. Your faves could simply never, I’m sorry. Ten + Donna will forever be my ultimate fav season, my fav companion, my favorite everything of Doctor Who forever and always. (Also David Tennant & Catherine Tate’s irl chemistry is the best, they are just so good whenever they’re together on screen.)

3. Iron Bull (Dragon Age Inquisition)

It is almost impossible for me to pick my favorite character from Dragon Age more than any other series because I really do love them all too much. I mean, Hawke, my disaster bisexual? Fenris, my moody little porcupine? Dorian? Sera? Leliana? VARRIC?!?! To me one of the defining features of Dragon Age are its excellent ensemble casts. The fascinating dynamics between all these messed up weirdos trying their best to save the world. But if I had to pick one guy, the one who definitely surprised me with how absolutely head-over-heels in love I fell with him, well then I have to give it up to the Big Man himself, our beloved Iron Bull. I remember when it was first announced we were getting a Qunari love interest, and not only was he a Big McLarge Huge Warrior Guy, he was pansexual. I was braced for a walking punchline, leering and making jokes and flirting with everyone in a really crass way (not that there’s anything wrong with that, just you know, it’s been done before). But what I got instead was a burnt-out professional liar with a determined love for softness, for pleasure. Bull is an incisively intelligent and brutally calculating man who is willing to turn his back on his country and everything he's ever known, to become an outcast, just to stick up for the people he loves the most. Dude's got layers. He loves dawnstone because it's pretty and pink, he totally gets off on fighting dragons, he calls Vivienne ma'am and plays mindchess with Solas in his spare time. And obviously, of course, him being a loving dom who gives you a place to be something other than the literal Herald of Andraste was just the icing and sprinkles on top of this already delicious slice of beefcake.

4. Izzy Hands (Our Flag Means Death)

Oh boy. Hoo boy. Okay. We're getting into it now. Sometimes you just see an absolute miserable little rat bastard of a man and go "yes, that one, that one's mine thank you." While I love Stede for Gender Reasons and I love Ed because he's literally perfect, and the tender sweetness of Jim + Olu melt my heart into a pool of butter, and everyone else in the cast is absolutely spectacular, down to the guest roles, there's just something about Izzy. It’s undeniable. We love a complicated character round these parts, naturally, but also, how could you not be obsessed with one so singularly pathetic and yearning and just absolutely begging to be stepped on as Izzy motherfucking Hands. Just. His whole deal?? Imagine being so fucking married to the fictionalized persona you helped create of the man you've decided to devote your entire life to. Imagine knowing that the crumbs of affection you accept from him are the most that you could ever hope to get, because you and he just aren't made for anything else, you are Hard Men and this is a Violent, Terrible world. Until, suddenly, in walks this fucking prissy little nonce with no skills and all of the privilege, who by all rights should have been shot dead the second he set foot in Nassau, and somehow this fucking idiot manages to utterly bewitch your husband god Captain?? Who, it turns out, actually did want all of that lovely sweet softness you told yourself was Forbidden, For Reasons, and he is actually perfectly capable of showing warmth and devotion and care for someone, just not You. No, instead you are fated to watch your Captain and This Fucking Idiot fall in love, right in front of your face, and the rest of his floating insane asylum treat you like you're the bad guy here. Like, bitch, I would probably want to stab someone about that too!! (And that's not even getting into the Toe Thing, which. Jesus Christ. The Toe Thing). Also, he has the privilege of being portrayed by Con O'Neil, who I have the most atrocious of crushes on, so really, how could I not pick him?

5. Flint (Black Sails)

Speaking of Messed Up Gay Pirates. I know we can all relate to someone being so fundamentally angry about homophobia that he decides to declare war on all of Britain about it, right? No, but for real, James Flint McGraw’s entire arc, from earnest do-good Homosexual with politically radical beliefs to vengeful ginger murder-pirate to tired old man who gets to retire to a lifetime of gentle lovemaking with his recently-unburied Husband was something I never expected, but was utterly delighted by nonetheless. There is just so much seething rage burning under the surface of this man, that constant war between his tenderness, his capacity for love and care that was so cruelly ripped from him by such a corrupt system, and then his yearning for violence and vengeance. And, on top of that, the ways he relates to the women of the show; his entire co-dependant Thing with Miranda, which is so queer it’s almost beyond definition in the best way, and his Tired Gay Dad routine with Eleanor, and to a lesser extent, Madi. Plus, he’s damaged and hot and so so sad about it, and he looks so criminally good covered in blood it should actually be a crime. To this day the entirety of the “in the dark there is discovery” monologue fully lives rent free in my head, not to mention “my truest love, know no shame.” Ultimate blorbo status for sure.

6. Joan Watson (Elementary)

Confession time: I was definitely one of those people who was initially dubious and upset that they were doing yet another modern Sherlock Holmes adaptation, and not only that, but they were making Watson a woman! “Oh this is obviously an egregious No Homo attempt, fuck this show,” I thought, and I was fully prepared to write off the whole enterprise. But then I found out they had cast Lucy Liu as Watson and I was conflicted because, seriously, Lucy Liu, how could you not totally love her? I decided to give the first episode a shot and was delighted to discover that Miss Joan totally captured my heart from the literal moment she appeared on screen. I’ve never been the biggest fan of the original Holmes stories so take all my opinions with a grain of salt here, but I love that Joan is played as Watson who is an actual equal to Sherlock. Their dynamic is an honest-to-god partnership, instead of the tired trope of the Brilliant Amazing Perfect Special Genius Boy and the long-suffering idiot who puts up with him. You can really see what Sherlock sees in Joan, all the things he values in her: her strength and quiet brilliance, her inquisitiveness and determination, and how she utterly refuses to put up with his bullshit from like, day one. This is a Watson with healthy boundaries, y’all. She’s just such a wonderful character in her own right. She’s more than Sherlock’s blogger, she has a life and dreams and goals of her own, and the show respects that. And not only that, but there is not even a hint of any tired romance tropes between the two of them. Their quiet queerplatonic domestic partnership evolves in such a really lovely way across the series, it is one of the core dynamics of the show, and it’s so good. And each episode is an excuse to look at Lucy Liu in gorgeous outfits for an hour at a time, which I will happily take where I can find it. Good show. Criminally underrated.

7. Aziraphale (Good Omens)

Alright, I’ve got another shameful confession for you. I’ve never actually managed to finish reading Good Omens. I know I know, nail me to the cross. There was just something about the writing style that I could never fully get into, but I got far enough to know that Crowley and Aziraphale were totes in love 5ever, and even though I wouldn’t have understood why at the time, I really Related to Aziraphale for Some Mysterious Reason. Smash cut to 2019 and the first season of the TV version premiers and I’m watching Michael Sheen do all That as Aziraphale and a lightbulb pops on over my head and I just go oh. Gender!! There’s a tumblr post I love that talks about how Aziraphale is soft and effeminate and good, and that is such an important part of his character. He on-purpose cultivates a deliberately gay image because he relates to gay culture, because he identifies with being a maligned outcast to society the same way homosexuals were for most of the time he’s been on Earth. Our Angel loves food and pleasure and soft warm things, and that never stops him from being a hero. In fact, it is because of his hedonism and softness that he defies Heaven and Hell to literally save the day. To quote from that post directly, “He’s soft and queer and vain and he loves food and these are good qualities! These things are his and he wears them openly and defiantly and they make him strong in a way heaven doesn’t comprehend!” God, just, *slaps Aziraphale’s belly* this bad boy can hold so much gender. I love him endlessly.

8. GLaDOS (Portal 2)

So rarely in media are women allowed to be unhinged murderous lunatics, but GLaDOS carries that heavy burden on her beautiful robot shoulders admirably. I think sometimes the fanon characterization of her focuses a little too heavily on either the tragedy of her, of Caroline being forced into this body against her will, or on the whole Evil Dommy Mommy Step on Me Cold Calculating Badass thing, which is unfortunate, because GlaDOS is also completely fucking bonkers in the best way. Not a goddamn hinge anywhere to be found on this bitch, and that’s what makes her so special. She’s silly! And weird! Her toxic yuri mother-daughter Thing with Chell is endlessly compelling, and every line out of her mouth is an ice-cold banger. Also, she gets the special honor of being one of the few characters I’ve cosplayed as, and she is certainly one of the funnest to portray. To this day I still have the entirety of her wake-up speech from Portal 2 memorized. “Okay look. We both said a lot of things you’re going to regret. But I believe we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster.” She’s incredible.

9. Yuna (FFX, FFX-2)

My first blorbo! Yuna Finalfantasy will always have a special place in my heart, for reasons I’m not sure I can properly articulate. FFX is one of The Games of All Time for me, I literally used to listen to the soundtrack as a lullaby, and to this day my dad and I can quote the dialogue along with the cutscenes. And Yuna’s arc just absolutely destroys me if I think too hard about it. She is just so good, she is quiet and gentle and sweet and absolutely drowning under the crushing enormity of her legacy, her mission, the fate of the goddamn literal world. And then she meets her match in the Manic Pixie Dream (Heh) Boy who gets her to open up and live a little, who makes her laugh and smile, and she really values him for it, for the discovery and possibility he represents for her. And then, the ultimate tragedy of him being the one to sacrifice for her, that she may live? Ugh!! It’s raining. On my face. To this day the scene of her Sending after Kilika just guts me, and the way she grows and changes and comes into her own over the course of FFX-2 breaks me down to my atoms. Best girl, no question.

10. Astarion (Baldur’s Gate 3)

Alright. Okay. Yes. I know. I’m going to try and make this entry not just a rehash of my last post about Astarion or unhinged gay screaming for 500 words but like. Come on. Look at him. I never played Baldur’s Gate during early access,  but when I found out that one of your potential love interests was a queer pretty-boy vampire with a Tragic Backstory involving a twisted Master/slave dynamic I was...intrigued, to say the least. What I did not expect was all of the depth and complexity that went into writing him and portraying him. It helps that Neil Newbon has an absolutely delicious voice, yes, but there is so much more there besides the surface level of him. In fact, that is the entire point of his arc! Seeing beyond the very pretty seductive mask he presents to the world, to the gaping wounds and barely-concealed traumas and fear and insecurities behind it, and choosing to love him for it anyway. And by loving him, the real him, you make space for him to find himself, to rescue himself. A man who has spent 200 years buried under ground surviving horrific abuse and becoming cruel and petty to cope, finding the strength within himself to heal, to choose to live and to love, honestly. That is so fucking powerful, I will literally never get over it.

[non-neutoniangender]

More CR, more scarves. I watched 4-sided dive between episodes and hot damn I have thoughts about that too.

The essek lore!?!?!?! Aaaaaaaaaa

Also always love watching the cast interact outside of sessions, and 4-sided dive is really well conceived for their dynamic.

Sam..... sam... your add spots are like notoriously bad, cringey? literally everyone saw the second shoe coming lol. God why does sam always subvert exelpectations like that. Anyway, thoughts:

Lol that was the wrong episode I clicked on. That was the spot from next episode.

This is certainly a battle

Poor Imogen doesn't know how guns work

That was an intense encounter lol

But damn Birdie!! She's got some firepower

This is such a cute little hideout!

.....more rocks

The whole time thing is..... really interesting

Ira...... is............ hmmmmmmm very Fey, chaotic, does kinda whatever

Also Morrigan? Hmmmmmmm

What a cool telescope!!!!

Matt is so good at describing things damn

A whole ass ley line god damn

This is a wild mechanism

Lol not everyone failing those damn perception checks on the damn moon

But wow. This moon is.... something else.

Not sure it was birdies silhouette..... was it Otohan!!??!???

"The old fate-sticher herself" WHOMST!?!?!? damn fearne. But also imso intrigued!! I love fate its such a cool concept

"The old Hag" hmmmmmm what an interesting turn of phrase.....

Older elven man, white hair, blue and grey robes, cane....... fucking Ludinus D'eleth ????? God damn he can't keep himself out of trouble

Double date with Ira lmao!!!!

Whoof that's a powerful crown

Damn love at first sight bro

But also what a sweet story!!! I love hearing stories of people meeting their significant others

No way!!!!! Fearnes grandmother stretched time to have Fearne longer!?!?! Holy shit (damn thanks Ira)

Mori is HOW tall!?!? 13 or 14 feet!?!? Who the fuck is she? She's gotta be some kind of powerful fey being and I cannot wait to figure out who.

A collector..... a hag, no one knows how old she is.... one of many titles.... huh

Wow there are a lot more layers to this Fearne growing up situation that previously thought. Also I wonder if fearne was the payment for the lense that she brought to her parents that would've been....... something.

Marisha is on a chair... shits getting real

But a cage around a moon that's new ish.... showing up where it shouldn't, giving people nightmares........

God the storytelling in dice rolls is.... impeccable as always.

A CITY!?!?!?!? holy shit oh my god not two campaigns were cities are a problem, God I hope this one isn't alive.

WOW that was quite the session holy shit. If this campaign didn't have me hooked before, it definitely does now. Holy shit I'm so curious how this ties into the rest of the story of the world.

[cantalooprat]

Faraway Wanderers

What I Liked

now i understand why liang jiuxiao had to die i, half-dying after speed-reading tyk and pretty sure missing A Lot of Subtext: wow i love priest works

first! and foremost! the relationship dynamics between zzs and wkx!!!! mmh have i ever said i love how priest writes romance? because i really do!!! two lonely people who only found each other by happenstance, trying to break away from the shackles of their past... i almost can't believe there are people who say zzs and wkx's romance feels rushed, like zzs is only putting up with wkx... like wow. zzs is very, from the beginning, his time is limited---3 years! he plans to muck around for 3 years, relishing his limited-time freedom and then dying peacefully somewhere, probably alone. but then he got caught up in a jianghu conspiracy and finds a family in the form of a flirtatious madman, his lackey in purple, and a crybaby boy, and finds that these "noisy people" make him want to live again. and wkx too! he was just out for revenge, and probably wouldn't have minded dying after, because he doesn't really have anything to live for, anyway---but then he meets zzs completely by chance, this suspicious figure who's somehow on the same wavelength as him, and at first i'm like, wow, how exactly did he decide that zzs is perfect for him? but then all of their offhand conversations, the responses zzs gives him, it all makes sense when his past is revealed. this is the person who understands him, and yet they meet when this person is about to die---just how painful is a fate like that? good thing it's a happy end novel lmao

It's Not A Priest Novel If There Are No Beloved Side Characters Whose Fates Are To Die: buy one get one free edition! i just wanted cao weining and gu xiang to be happy /crying but that little bit in the underworld really... i'm so happy that they met again, and that even meng po was sympathetic and gave them the red string so they could meet again in their next life...

mmh there's actually just, so much to unpack in tyk, like all priest novels lmao i love that even though it's a jianghu story about a conspiracy and sect politics, at its core, it's just zzs and wkx's story. zzs honestly really doesn't give a single rat's ass about whatever happens in the jianghu, he just gets embroiled in the conspiracy because he happened to save zcl. meanwhile, wkx is actually deeply involved in the conspiracy, but he's there to cast it all away, and if he just so happens to find someone whom he might be able to call his soulmate, then, well...that might be just his luck, isn't it?

zzs is such a delightfully unreliable narrator, he basically fell in love with wkx at first sight but then just! doesn't know what to do with Feelings! and is, y'know, also dying, so falling in love and having that love reciprocated probably isn't in his bucket list of "what to do before i die in 3 years". i loved the push and pull they had, and all the unsaid insecurities between the lines---zzs likes wkx, and it would've been fine if he was the only one in love, if wkx isn't serious about him, because he'll be happy to have wkx for the rest of his days, but then wkx would be lonely after he dies. but he also doesn't know what to do---love isn't exactly a priority when his main job had been machinating politics in the capital, and then being the head of an assassination group to stabilize the emperor's reign. he said it himself, he doesn't know how sincere wkx's feelings are, and he can't help but be on guard the entire time. but it says A Lot that he then wants to live, that he then dares to hope for survival because there will be someone by his side who wants him there, and zzs's "i love you" to wkx is basically "i'll spend the rest of my days with you until our hair grows white with age" and i think that's just, really sweet and romantic

and wkx too, oh man, it's really something else rereading the beginning of the story, rereading his early conversations with zzs. i said it above, but i really did feel like it was super sudden when he was all "this person understands me and i want to spend my life with him" but it all becomes clear at the end. wkx has always been lonely, having his family massacred and then having to survive among the very people who killed them, unable to trust anyone but the literal infant he raised like a little sister/daughter figure, not understanding societal conventions and seeming like a campy weirdo but it's probably precisely because he's had no healthy frame of reference of what being a "normal person is like". and then he meets zzs, this suspicious figure who's caught his attention, and then finds out that he has literally no interest in the jianghu conspiracy that literally everyone is crazy about, then casually, very casually probes him for his opinions on, y'know, very random things about morality and views in life. by some fortunate happenstance, this person's answers make him feel at ease that there's someone out there who isn't afraid of him, who reassures him that, yeah, y'know, sometimes people become bad because of circumstances, and not because they are bad from the beginning, that even bad people could deserve sympathy and love. and then it turns out that this person whom he's been very fortunate to meet just happens to be dying, and, well, it's good that he hasn't fallen in love completely, right? nope, not at all, he's very very much in love and already can't let zzs go.

that one priest interview where she gets asked "what will wkx do if zzs really dies, will he destroy the jianghu/court" and priest is like "nah, he'll just be completely lost and out of his mind as he deliriously lives, thinks of zzs, and then dies" and i'm like, wow, that's really quite intense, but i also feel like that says a lot about wkx as a person, that at the core he's not a violent person who's out for revenge---if zzs were to die, then... he would just, be really sad and lonely.

What I Disliked

iunno if it’s rly a con, but like, there’s nothing quite…lacking w tyk, when thinking of cons it’s actually hard to say. but ig a con is that, even though there’s nothing lacking, i don’t rly…feel much post-reading? i feel a lot this way for priest works in general, excepting liu yao lmao

Notes

the more i read priest works the more i like them lmao it's... hm. i'm kind of surprised that the seeming international favorite modu is prob my least fav of the ones i've read so far (liuyao, modu, qiye, tianyake). not that it's bad, because it's really not! but the themes in the other ones just seem to resonate with me more, and i think that's absolutely lovely that she has such varied works that touch on various existential questions (?)

mmh i have to say i really love the title "tianyake"/"faraway wanderers", there's something so ephemerally beautiful about it and the specific imagery it evokes in my mind---this picture of two people walking along the edge where the sky meets a mirror-like surface that reflects the endless azure expanse and the white clouds floating idly, away from the vicissitudes of life and the shackles of the secular world...

Quotes

When cold rain falls, autumn makes itself known; the wutong tree ages and dies. Thin robes offer no protection from a night of bitter winter, years and lives wasting, whiling away… nothing more than this: resentment, that we met so late. (going off this translation)

[divinepriestesskokomi]

I JUST FINISHED THE STORY QUEST AND IT WAS SO GOOD OMG

my thoughts undercut, beware of spoilers

These thoughts are going to be all over the place and won't cover everything I'm thinking bc I'm really just dumping the first thing that comes to mind. It's been a long day and i'm tired lol

First of all. THE LORE. We FINALLY got to know more about Cyno's past, and it was SO good! His ties to the Temple of Silence and Hermanubis are so interesting, I have so many more questions but my mind is so cluttered with thoughts I can't get them all down rn.

I'm so happy we finally got to see Cyrus, and got to see more of the dynamic between him and Cyno! Such an interesting dynamic. It's alot like I imagined it being, where they are father and son but in an unconventional way. Like Cyno doesn't call him father, he just calls him professor, but they still very much have that father son dynamic. And oh my god those little photos of baby Cyno....my heart 😭 I loved the mentions of Lisa too, I love the idea of her being like an older sister figure to Cyno

I have mixed feelings on Cyrus himself, like he was apparently good to Cyno growing up and protected him from the Akademiya trying to do experiments on him, but also like?? He kinda kidnapped him from the Temple of Silence? That part really got glossed over in the story quest ldskgjdklfgj. Not only that, but he was part of the original experiments that got Cyno his powers. So he feels very morally grey to me. I'm kinda giving him the side eye.

Also they said that Cyno's parents gave him up to be used as a vessel. So are they still alive and part of the Temple of Silence?? Where are they???

And I AM a little sad that it was confirmed that Cyno can't communicate with Hermanubis, since I've always loved that in fan content. But hey, at least it can still exist in fan content, hehe

Also the unexpected crumbs for Tighnari lore????? Hell yeah

AN D OH MY GOD THEY REALLY FED THE CYNONARI FANS WITH THIS ONE. I was right in my guess that Tighnari would insist on coming along to support Cyno! There were so many sweet moments between them. Tighnari being protective of Cyno and not wanting him to go alone. Also the way they just casually show that Cyrus knows both Tighnari and Collei well is so cute omg. Cyno bringing his husband and daughter to visit his father, so cute 🥺 Also the way Tighnari made a point to say that Cyno needed to keep his power for his own sake, not just the Akademiya's sake, was really sweet. It was like he was giving Cyno a little reminder that he's more than just the General Mahamatra, he's his own person. And how that really seemed to get through to Cyno during his fight with Sethos.

I LOVED the little hints we got of their time in the Akademiya together. That they used to sit on the divine tree together and watch the sunset as they did their school work together omg 🥺 It does make their timeline a little confusing, so I guess Cyno was the General Mahamatra even while he was a student, because Tighnari's character story mentions that he and Cyno met when Cyno was the General Mahamatra and was investigating Tighnari, but now this quest also implies they were both students together. So I guess General Mahamatra is a position they can give to students too.

And the little family moments between Cyno, Tighnari, and Collei made my heart melt. Them both being so proud of Collei and how far she's come. Them having little codes and being able to understand eachother with a look. and oh my GOD the moment where Collei bailed the moment Cyno started telling jokes had me in tears.

And of course we got to see more of Cyno and Tighnari's friendships with the other Sumeru cast. I love how Kaveh and Alhaitham were just immediately looking out for Cyno the moment they realized something was fishy, and immediately knew to get Tighnari and Collei involved once Cyno ran off. And even Faruzan and her being all worried and protective of them in her own way! It was just so sweet.

And I'm very happy with how things went with Sethos! I was afraid at first that having a new playable character appear for the first time in this quest would take away from the focus being on Cyno, but they did really well with it! Cyno was still very much the focus, As for Sethos himself, he seems really interesting and I can't wait to learn more about him when he's released. He seems an interesting mix of sweet and mischievous. Like he obviously cares for everyone at the temple so much, but is also not opposed to blackmail. Very curious to see more of him.

Also sidenote, I really enjoyed how much internal monologue they added to this quest, it was cool getting to hear the thoughts of characters other than the traveler for once.

Overall I'm just SO happy with this quest, it was so good! And I was so happy to see my boys again!

Also Naphis looks so fucking funny. Laughed my ass off everytime that man was on screen. Nari I can't believe that's your master. Silly looking ass

[celestialnocturnes]

a message to my youth (reply 1988 thought dump)

warning: this isn't meant to be a coherent review or commentary on reply 1988. i literally just finished the kdrama a few moments ago and i want to preserve what i'm feeling through this entry. this is only a cathartic attempt to show how the kdrama had impacted me in so many ways. also, spoilers!

--

to the things that are already gone. to a time that has already passed, i want to say a belated farewell. goodbye, my youth.

watching a kdrama wasn't in my top priorities this year, but things that used to be a part of you would demand to be revisited sometimes. i'm glad that i did, and i'm thankful that it was reply 1988.

taking a nostalgic look at the year 1988, this kdrama tells about the story of five families in a humble block in ssangmun, seoul. for someone born 12 years after the setting, the plot is something strange, a history lesson in the lens of simple households. for someone in the limbo between careless youth and adulting, and someone born in an asian family, this kdrama will feel like home.

culturally speaking, reply 1988 was a beautiful exposition of how asian households run. what got me hooked to continue the drama was the endless saga of giving dishes to neighbors in the first episode. funnily enough, all families ended up having a feast of each house's dinner on their tables.

from a mouthwatering display of korean side dishes, to the trends of 1988 korea (back when jyp himself was a hit lolz jk), to the endless neighborhood gossips, to the flawed and conservative views on politics, and to the tight-knitted family dynamics — one would find this hilarious and relatable, informative even.

reply 1988 was a lot of things, but its casts hold a special place in my heart. the gang had so much love between them and it was so beautiful to see a pure friendship evolve through the years. i wish i could still have loud dinners and drunken nights with my friends when we get into our careers. I would love that.

sung deok sun, the optimistic figure in the group, was a ray of sunshine to me even as a viewer. i love deok sun because her spirits were never faltered by her failures and her status in life. my personality is sooo far from deok sun's, but she was relatable to me when she said she didn't know what to do in her life. she doesn't have a dream, i have a lot of them. even so, the uncertainty is there. i guess we all figure things out in the end. deok sun became a flight crew and was able to earn money for the family. i can't wait to figure out my own path, too.

dong ryong, being deoksun's self-proclaimed soulmate faced the same journey. despite not getting into a prestigious university, it's amazing how he was able to establish his own restaurant and even expand branches! makes you really think that not everything in life can be solved by good grades. honestly, i wish i have his street smarts and wisdom. what a powerful person i would be, then.

jung hwan was the man of few words in the group. he showed his affections not through words, but through his actions (and teases for deok sun). his love language would definitely be acts of service! i love jung hwan. he was a good son, brother, and friend. i aspire to have the kindness that he has. but oh dear heavens i would kill just to see how his love life would unfold had he faced the courage to confess to deok sun. i mean, come on! just be straightforward! they would honestly make a good pair, the ray of sunshine girl and the cold guy.

choi taek, the professional go-gamer, was the baby of the group. like jung hwan, he was a man of few words, except that taek was actually shy. his growth through the series was perhaps the most apparent. his innocent image was eventually changed by the way he picked up curse words from the gang, to his smoking, and to his openness of affection for his family and later on, deok sun. also, his character made me fall in love with park bo gum and his smile!

before i go to the next two characters that i associate myself with, i would also like to comment on the household parents of the block. the fathers here have different personalities, but their identities as providers of the house defined the way they act. they keep a tough act and may be distant to their children, but the love is there even though they don't really know much about the household.

and the mothers, oh dear, the mothers. my mom is not a working entity, but i've seen her struggle through the years. i think her burdens are even heavier than that of my dad's. the way this kdrama portrayed the stories of the mothers touched my heart so much that i couldn't stop my tears. never underestimate a woman's strength, i tell you.

from these figures, i learned so much about adulting and marriage. our parents miss their parents, too. our parents would always worry about us, no matter how old we are. our parents are trying to keep everything together, so they put up a tough front. our parents' wishes are devoted to their children. our parents just want the best life for us. not only us are growing old, but our parents, too. our parents want our attention, too. our parents do not have the perfect marriage, but they would do anything for their children. our parents love us deeply.

okay, here goes my reflection in the kdrama — sun woo and sung bora. initially, i was planning to write an entry only about bora, but i realized that i am in many ways alike to sun woo as well. both characters are the eldest children of the family and they face a lot of pressure in their respective families. both characters sacrificed their dreams because they are limited to what their families can afford. sung bora took math education despite her dreams as a prosecutor. sun woo took medicine because that was what his mom wanted. as for me, i chose a course that would promise a stable salary. i dreamed to work in the field of science or writing, but both paths have unstable pays in this country. i do not come from a well-off family, so i have to set my dreams aside.

bora and i do not share the same personality. hers was aggressive and frank, mine was the opposite. even so, i found a piece of my soul in her character because she was steadfast in her goals and was very understanding of her family's situation. she was the cream of the crop in the siblings, the only one who became a student in the premier university, the talk of the neighborhood. she had strong political stances that made her own parents almost disown her, but she was never sorry for it. when it comes to little things, bora had so much privacy over her things that she would get mad at the slightest unauthorized touch of it. oh dear, if that wasn't me.

sun woo, on the other hand, was nearing my male counterpart. he cares so much about his mom and his sister that he hated the thought of the former working. he was the model student, the one with the straight a's, and the one who acts professionally even with the internal turmoil of emotions. he never opposed his mother's wishes and he loved his sister dearly. he would always hold his feelings in, but gets weak in the arms of a loved one. based on his upbringing and firm values, you would also see how he respects women. i love it.

these two never worked out at first because they prioritized their dreams above romance, but i'm so, so happy that they got together in the end.

reply 1988 was perhaps one of the best slice of life shows that i've ever seen. i wish i had watched this when i was younger, because it would teach you so much about family, love, dreams, friendship, and growing up. the pacing would feel kind of slow because of its movie-length episodes, but i swear it was worth it.

to the youth that i was, thank you for building the youth that i am.

to the youth that i am, enjoy the uncertainty and strive to be a better version of yourself.

to the youth that will be, may you never lose the spark inside your heart no matter how old you are.

i will hear your reply in time.

most ardently,

grace

[deonideatta]

hi hi i heard you like chief kim and i'm here to get all the intel on why it's a good drama 😊 and what you love about park jae bum's other dramas 😊 pls let me know if there's romance bc that's the oxygen i breathe when i watch a show 💕

Hello!!! Thank you for asking me about Chief Kim!!!! I can go on about it for ages lol. This got a bit long so i’m putting it under a cut

Chief Kim (aka Good Manager) is a comedy office drama with 20 eps, and it aired in 2017. There isn’t a main romance plotline, but don’t let that put you off! It’s an incredible drama in so many ways. (tho there is a subtle romance side plot, but it doesn’t involve the main character and it’s never the main focus, though it is cute). It does feature a bromance that was so great that the two actors literally won an award for it tho lol, so there’s also that!

In a way, the general premise is somewhat similar to Vincenzo in that it’s the main character and an unlikely team of others fighting a big corporation. The comedic tone is also more or less the same. The drama follows Kim Seong Ryong (the titular Chief Kim, played by Namgoong Min), a man with a talent for handling numbers who goes from running a seedy accounting firm to quite accidentally becoming a champion of employees rights in one of the biggest corporations in the country. He originally joins the company with the goal of embezzling a lot money and moving abroad, but he gets swept up in office politics surrounding high executives and the sinister goings on surrounding the position he was recruited for, as well as the shady things the higher-ups want him to do and the suspicion of the other members of his department. Eventually he starts to work alongside them to fight the corruption of the higher ups, and quickly becomes the bane of top management’s existence by being so incredibly annoying that they begin to regret hiring him.

It’s the kind of drama that really gets you to laugh, while still being incredibly heartwarming. The main character is so unashamedly funny, and the character dynamics are all so warm, and none of it ever seems forced. The first tag for the drama on MyDramaList is “character development”, and that says a lot! There’s so much growth that goes on for all the characters, even some of the villains! It’s especially funny because to begin with all the good things Kim Seong Ryeong does are completely by accident, and he’s annoyed but also pleased with all the attention it gets him. Over time he begins to own it, and begins to actively try to stand up to the corrupt people at the top of the company. The other highlight for me besides the humor is definitely the characters. From the eccentric main character, to the no-nonsense second in command in his department Yoon Ha Kyung, to the aggressive finance director Seo Yul who is always eating (one of my all time favourite characters, played by 2PM’s Junho), to the janitor lady who always roasts everyone, there isn’t a single dull character, whether good or bad. And Seo Yul gets one of the best character arcs I’ve ever seen in a kdrama. You get to watch the characters struggle and triumph, and you feel for them because their struggles feel so real, and the drama really gets you invested in them. You see the ways in which they fight to survive as normal working class citizens and you want them to win.

It differs from Vincenzo in that the main character isn’t considered evil and loses his less savoury traits over the course of the drama (his character arc is one of becoming a more upstanding citizen), and the message is one of fighting against corporate greed using the corporate system against itself in order to make things better for the average working citizen. But there’s the same plotting, and the same feeling of rooting for the protagonist team to win as you watch them plot and plan. I never rewatch things, but i’ve rewatched Chief Kim twice already and i’m looking forward to rewatching it again soon (just writing about it is making me want to rewatch it right now lol). It especially hits well for me because i love office dramas, and the humor and the bromance are just right. (Also, not entirely related, but it’s the first drama Kim Seonho was in!)

Another Park Jaebum drama i can definitely recommend is The Fiery Priest! It’s also a comedy action drama with 20 eps (released in 2019), and it follows Kim Hae Il (Kim Nam Gil), a catholic priest with a real temper, as he works to solve the mystery surrounding the death of a senior priest. No romance there either, but it’s got the same humor as Chief Kim and Vincenzo, and the same overarching found family trope (that really shines for this one). It’s darker than Chief Kim, but not as dark as Vincenzo. The plot is very intriguing, and it’s the kind of drama you feel compelled to keep watching to see what happens next. And the host of characters in that drama is still one of my favourites to this day. Every character was incredibly written, and they all played vital roles in the overall story. Again, lots of character development all round, and great character arcs not just for the main character (even for a few of the villains!). Plus it was lovely to watch the various characters interact, get closer, and build relationships. Such an iconic squad. Not to mention how funny it is?? And the fight scenes??? In fact, I enjoyed it so much that when I checked Park Jaebum’s page on MyDramaList after watching it around June last year and saw Vincenzo as an upcoming project, I added it to my plan to watch list immediately even though there was only a single line of synopsis lol. It’s also got an absolute banger of a soundtrack!

When you think about it, all three (Chief Kim, TFP and Vincenzo) can be simplified to “guy with dubious past sets out to fight corruption and creates a great support circle in the process”. All three are dramas of finding people who care about you and are willing to fight alongside you, and fighting for your convictions/what you think is right. Each main character starts out as a somewhat solitary figure, and you get to watch as they each find people who are willing to fight alongside them and support them. What exactly those specific convictions are varies in each drama, but Park Jaebum writes the character development arcs incredibly each time, and the relationships between the characters are so real and so satisfying to watch. And yet the integrity of the main character in each drama is never compromised either, it’s shown that they can grow and become better without losing themselves. The growth is also in the way that they learn to work with and rely on others, because teamwork makes the dream work. And then to cap it all off he lets them have victories, and he makes it SO satisfying??? There are highs and there are lows, and you feel all of those right there with the characters, which makes the victories feel so so good. In each we see the ensemble cast get involved with the fight and the plotting, and we get to see all their epic plans and their execution, and the victories they win that build up over time. And it’s so satisfying to me! I love it a lot, just thinking about it is making me smile lol. It also shows how well humor and darker/more serious plotlines/events are balanced in the dramas, neither is compromised in favour of the other, but it always works so well that the humor never feels forced or out of place. As someone who doesn’t like overbearingly dark shows, I really appreciate that. They all give you lots to laugh at, while not losing any of the plot to the funny.

Of course there are differences, notably the romance, and the fact that Vincenzo is bad vs bad rather than good vs bad like the other two. They deal more with redemption (especially The Fiery Priest), but that works for the stories that are being told, and it’s very well executed.

It’s worth noting that Park Jaebum also wrote Good Doctor and 4 seasons of God’s Quiz. I haven’t checked those out yet, but I’ve heard good things about all of them. He also wrote Blood, I haven’t seen that one either but opinions seem to be split on how good it was. All of those are medical dramas (which is the reason I haven’t watched them lol, i can’t stand medical dramas) from before 2017, when he wrote Chief Kim. It seems he’s been on a roll since then, good for him and good for us lol. You can see everything he’s written on his MyDramaList page.

Overall I enjoyed the Park Jaebum dramas I have seen for first and foremost the comedy, but also for the warmth of the character relationships and for how well developed/written each character is. And I love how he balances the humor with more poignant/darker moments, I laughed a lot watching all three dramas, but I’ve cried over each of them as well. It’s a good balance to have, it gives you a good plot to be interested in, but doesn’t keep you stressed and sombre the whole way through. I’ve seen people say that Vincenzo wouldn’t be as good if it wasn’t so wacky, and I fully agree. It’s the same for both TFP and Chief Kim, and that balance is definitely what I appreciate most in Park Jaebum’s dramas. I know I will laugh, but I also know I will get an incredible plot and incredible characters, and that’s really important for me. Plus I know I can trust that there will be a good ending because the writer cares about his characters.

I definitely recommend checking out both TFP and Chief Kim after Vincenzo is done, especially since they’re so similar in terms of comedic tone and basic plot direction. If you ever get to watching either of them feel free to hmu to chat about it!! There’s lots of plot stuff that can be can discussed.

lol this got v long (i have lots to say about how much i love these dramas haha), but I hope it’s helpful!!!

[dreamerandcrazy]

Ok, so I haven't been able to comment much on my Riverdale rewatch mostly bc i'm watching it with my boyfriend and we have an agreement of no cell phones when we're watching, otherwise we can't pay proper attention to it. But I wrote down some notes about the episodes I did watch (I watched up until ep 6, which is very ironic bc apparently today is its anniversary, so yay for my perfect timing). I actually remember most of the stuff that happened in s1, so here's mostly a few things I paid more attention to or noticed about the characters and the ships, or things i'm able to look at through a different view now that i've watched all the seasons. Strap in if you want to see my notes, if not just scroll please, no ship or character hate here please. Also, feel free to ignore, this is really just a personal look in some stuff I didn't notice in my first watch.

- Betty's character used to be much happier and lighter in season 1. I know we're introduced to "Dark Betty" right in episode 3, but still, I feel like the way Lili played Betty in season 1 did not hold the same "darkness" as it does in the following seasons. The scene where she is dancing happily in her bedroom because she's going to homecoming with the boy she likes? The scene where she introduces Jughead to the Blue & Gold and gets him to work with her? Her genuine innocent happiness at seeing her sister again after so much time? The way she interacted with Kevin and Veronica? Those were all chef's kiss because she actually feels like a teenager in them. In all her girly glory, she radiates youth energy and it's a thing that was sadly lacking after s1. Btw this is not a critique at Lili's acting at all, I blame it entirely on Ras and his obsession with dark Betty.

- There's actually so many indications of Cheryl being a lgbt character in the first episodes that I have no idea how I missed it the first time. But then again, there were many indications with Veronica as well, and sadly that's not the path Ras chose for her.

- Jughead in s1 is truly so superior in so many ways that it's not hard to see why he quickly became such a fan favorite. I think even if he wasn't played by Cole Sprouse, he still would have conquered many fans' hearts. Sadly, the things that made Jughead such a loving and interesting character for me also fizzled out in s2 when the writing team decided to make him a woke serpent leader instead of allowing him to sticking to his true personality as a passionate mystery lover, a dedicated friend and very nerdy, which was very cute. I feel that we got some of that back for him in s4, which was good, but sadly s1 is where my love for him really stayed to stay. But I still care for him, and s5 has a promising storyline for him which i'm excited about, so let's see if s5 Jughead can become better than s1 Jughead.

- Going back again to Cheryl for a sec, I just noticed that the red lipstick actually wasn't that common for her in s1? At least not in the first five. I wonder when did it start becoming her trademark? Anyways, it's actually a really good look her and allows you to appreciate Madelaine's natural beauty even more.

- Also, did anybody notice how Alice lowkey figured out who killed Jason in ep 2 lmao, like... in episode two she legit says she wouldn't be surprised if the Blossoms themselves had killed Jason, which... is what happened LMAO, considering we know it was his father. And even more hilarious and tragically ironic note, in ep 6 she's laughing at Betty suggesting that Hal killed Jason because "do you think your father has the stomach for it?!"... Ma'am... i'm-.... 😂😂😂😂.

- This rewatch has reminded me of how much I adored and how I much I miss Josie and the Pussycats. The girls were such a nice addition to the cast, and their songs were so beautiful. I truly wish we get to see them again someday, but at the same time I also think the actresses deserve to be at a work place where they're given the treatment they deserve and not completely ignored and treated like extras.

- Archie/Valerie was super cute and is very underrated in the fandom, but i'm glad Valerie stood up for herself and didn't take any of Archie's or Cheryl's sh*t. Still sucks because they were really good together, though.

- Why was Jason not allowed to talk, lmao? Like, i'm sure it's become a running joke in the show at this point, but back when season one was airing what was the excuse for it? He appeared in so many flashbacks and scenes and we still never heard a single word ☠️☠️☠️☠️. I just want to know what was the reason lol.

- I liked s1 Reggie, but I feel like Charles Melton's Reggie is better because he actually feels like a douche with good intentions lol, and he has more of a personality. Most of the time I even forgot about Reggie in s1, but after s2 he definitely made me more aware of him. So for that, I like Charles Melton's Reggie more. But the actor from s1 still did a good job with what he was given.

From now on I will be talking about the ships, so bear with me, and know that I am a multishipper. Yes, I have my preferences. No, my word is not law, it's just an opinion, so please respect it.

- Bughead is still super cute in s1. I feel like from s1 they will always be my otp, even if I no longer feel as strongly about them now and have a different insight as to where I would like their story to go, and now I definitely see the problem others had mentioned before of how they kind of took over the show, which is something I kind of closed my eyes to before... But I really loved them in s1. It felt like a very juvenile teenage relationship, they didn't give much thought on why and if they should be together, they just went for it like teenagers usually do, and they were very very cute together.

- I feel like if you don't count Beronica (because they really were the best no matter what you say or ship), if there's a ship that deserves "best chemistry" award for s1 is probably Varchie. I lost my interest in them years ago, but this rewatch reminded me of why I actually loved them once. They never really became an otp for me, but Kj and Camila's chemistry in s1 was VERY GOOD, and I really liked them. Their kiss in the pilot was electric and the s&xual tension was OOF, and that chemistry carries on through the season. You can easily tell something will happen between them eventually. It makes me sad bc I don't know what happened after s1, but their chemistry from s2 onwards was just... not there for me. Which is ironic bc it's the season they truly started dating and they got a lot of smexy scenes, but I just... didn't feel it. But I'll leave that comment to my s2 rewatch. For now just let me enjoy Varchie's chemistry in s1 while it lasts because it was really good.

- Now we get to Barchie, who I made clear was the reason for my rewatch, so let's get to it. I LOVED the way Barchie was written in s1. I remember when I first watched Riverdale, I was curious about their dynamic but didn't put much thought into it because I loved Bughead too much and wanted them to be together, and I thought Barchie would be the traditional "first og ship" thing and wouldn't have a big follow up, but boy was I WRONG and am I GLAD for it. I'll talk more about their development in the next seasons when I get there, so for now let's focus a bit on s1. Just in like the first two episodes, there is so much Barchie foreshadowing, like, it's legit insane how it was right there in my face and I missed it the first time! "I have never felt what i'm supposed to feel with betty", "it's not my fault he doesn't like you", "I can't give you the answer you want"... Omg, those are obvious eyebrow raising "this will come back to bite you in the a$$" moments and it's incredible how they actually DO! I would call it clever writing, but like... it's Riverdale lol. So I really am just glad that the ship was done this way, i'm glad Barchie has the back story that they do, they've really come a LONG way and i'm happy I get to experience their whole growing storyline. It's also especially good because s1 actually provides you with scenes that show you their friendship and how they're so close, you see them hanging out, talking, their pictures together, everything was just really done well with them. Still have a bit of critique with the way Archie contradicted himself sometimes regardinf his feelings for Betty, but let's be honest, we've watched enough Riverdale to know that's just a problem with the writing.

- Kevin/Joaquin is still my favorite Kevin ship, i'm sad it's completely impossible to go back to them someday so for now i'll just be really glad it existed and that I got to see them even if it was short-lived. They had great chemistry and their kiss scenes always outsold.

- Beronica... sigh. Beronica. The most wasted chemistry i've ever seen on CW and I've watched a LOT of CW shows. There was so much potential there, s1 was practically overflowing with them and it's one of the reasons it became some popular. I remember when the Beronica fandom was the biggest one, ah, good times. Veronica and Betty were easily the best part of season 1, their friendship, their lowkey romantic moments, they were just superior in every way. This ship deserved better, not even just as a ship, but as a friendship.

- Veronica's s1 hair >>> Veronica's hair in seasons 2-4. I loved the side part and I am glad it's back in season 5, it looks so much better like that.

- Cheryl, as always, deserves better. Can't wait for her to meet Toni so I can watch again Cheryl finally get to love someone and be loved back, which is exactly what she deserves.

For now, that is all! I will probably make another post soon when i'm done with season one and from season two on I will be live-blogging the episodes since I will be watching it alone. Once again, pls, no hate, my thoughts are my thoughts. Peace.

[franeridan]

Fran, what are the animes you're into this season, like that one with the pretty girls with nice colors 👀👀👀 (I'm in desperate need of distractions, but if this is annoying please ignore it and also have a nice day!!!)

Definitely not annoying please do allow me to gush about all the anime I'm following this season is full of great stuff!!! I'll give a little summary of what the story seems to be about for each of them, don't read that if you don't want spoilers for the first episodes! * next to the ones I really think you should check out

ura sekai picnic - about two girls (uni students!) who make a habit of crossing into a parallel dimension where urban legends are real and fight with them. one of them is looking for her lost friend, the other is unable to say no to the first and goes with her despite reason telling her it's better to let it go. seems gay atm so bonus points for that! makes liberal use of unnecessary cgi so points detracted for that. The girls are extremely amusing for me though!

* wonder egg priority - the one with the pretty girls in pretty colors! Something just slightly off of being a majokko, in which girls who've lost someone important to them seem to have found a way to bring them back to life by constantly risking their lives to fight monsters. It's more complicated than that, but this one isn't easy to explain in two words - extremely pretty, golden animation, wonderful moods and camera work, all the girls introduced till now seem wonderful! the plot is very interesting too, just on the wrong side of hopeful to make you sure something will go wrong any moment, love that

2.43 - volleyball anime! there's nothing much to say about this one tbh, it's mostly your typical sports anime. If I had to tell you to watch one anime out of this list this one would Not be it, but if you're like me and you enjoy listening to japanese accents you don't hear often in anime this one is amusing in that sense 😂😂 sorry, that's probably not what you want to know about this, but it really is my favourite thing about watching this one haha

back arrow - this one is DUMB. mecha anime in a fantasy setting, about a world that ends with a wall and a boy insisting he came from the other side of said wall and wanting to go back. it feels so random to watch you kinda want to keep on following it just to figure out where it's trying to go?? the protagonist is delightfully empty headed and the supporting cast has interesting dynamics and fun designs - also there's one guy between the maybe-antagonists that's so extremely chaotic neutral I enjoy every second he's on screen ngl

kai byoui ramune - about a doctor who cures supernatural illnesses. I can't say it's an exceptional anime in any way for now, but the sheer chaos the protagonist brings wherever he goes has me hooked for sure. Is he a nice guy? is he a bastard? is he actually both at the same time somehow??? I dunno but what's for sure is that he's exactly my type of character, and the supporting cast isn't half bad either!

* sk8 the infinity - about weirdos skating!!! delightful, fantastic, incredible colors and animation and designs and characters and character interactions, really a bones studio anime, I love it a bit more each new episode out. And it's hilarious! I don't think I've spent more than a couple of minutes of it not laughing in the whole three episodes out atm, really really suggest this one! Biggest selling point is the relationship between the two protagonists for sure, love me two best friends who just love the shit out of each other without an ounce of shame

* horimiya - shoujo manga about two classmates who one day find out they're completely different people outside school and become best friends. Adorable!!! Lovely!!!! Soft AND hilarious, the main girl is a gem and the main boy is just ideal, plus all the supporting characters are extremely charming and fun - the relationships between everyone seem to sail smoothly too, which makes the whole of it really relaxing to watch! I just love it, so glad I'm following it

* kemono jihen - demon anime about a halfling kid who one day finds out he isn't completely human and decides to join an agency that takes care of monsters-related accidents to maybe figure out what happened to his parents. This one is GOOD. First of all, the main protagonist is extremely charming, he's weird in a way that's on the edge of just being sad and it makes you want to keep following him to find out how the new bonds he's forming will help him grow. It IS kind of disgusting at points, but as far as I'm concerned it just adds to the charm of the anime - the visuals are damn great and the cast seems a lot of fun, can't wait to see how it keeps going 👀 I already have it in the list of manga I'll catch up on after the anime's over

PLUS I'm still following jujutsu kaisen, hanyou no yashahime and the digimon remake, but the last two are really just nostalgia things and the first I assume you already know I love with my whole heart 😂😂 this a busy season!!

[hirazuki]

Ooo I'm curious about your hot takes on the Inuyasha reboot after reading your tags 👀

Ahaha, where to start XD Idk if they are hot takes, but here are my thoughts in bullet point form for coherency, I couldn’t figure out how else to organize them. Under a cut, as usual, because it got lengthy... as usual :D

We are 13 episodes in, and I still have no idea wtf is going on or what the series is actually about. And yes, I’m aware that we didn’t know of Naraku’s existence or of the overarching plot until at least episode 16 of that series either and Inuyasha was still very episodic in nature at that early point too, but here’s the thing: Inuyasha did not build upon a pre-existing series. For better or for worse, Yashahime has certain expectations to live up to that the original anime didn’t, by virtue of its being a sequel. Unfair? Maybe, but tough; that’s what happens when you make a sequel. Additionally, despite us not knowing The Main Plot™ of Inuyasha until later, the basic framework for it was laid out clearly by... episode 2? I think? Find and collect the Shikon Jewel shards. Boom, done. Were there distractions or fillers? Sure, but you never got the sense that the characters simply up and forgot about the shards. Even in fillers, the shards often made some kind of appearance. With Yashahime, there’s like three potential storylines going on: 1. The most obvious: most of our main cast from the OG is missing; where are they? Apparently no one in-story cares! :D Inuyasha, who’s that lol. I’m all for a sequel focusing on the new generation with cameos of the old crew; after all, they already had their own series. But this is like... no one cares about them? No one talks about them? And the more characters go about not mentioning them, the stronger their absence is felt. Like, for instance, Kaede knows Moroha is InuKag’s daughter. Moroha grew up on her own, doesn’t know her parents. Kaede doesn’t mention them to Moroha, doesn’t even spare a passing thought about them for the audience’s benefit, Moroha doesn’t ask. Kagome’s family in the present day meet Moroha, recognize her as Kagome’s daughter and... say nothing??? Souta shows Towa Kagome and Inuyasha’s old photos, but doesn’t say a word to Moroha?! Like. It makes no sense. By people not even acknowledging their existence, it makes the fact that they are nowhere to be found even weirder. Also the new gen girls don’t care about their parents or finding out who they were/are... like, okay, it would maybe be in character for one or two of them, but all three don’t give a fuck??? 2. Kirinmaru/the rainbow pearls: Idk how familiar you are with the story, but similar deal with Naraku and the shards here. Kirinmaru is being set up as the villain, still a mysterious figure; our new gen trio is supposed to collect the rainbow pearls that... some of his henchmen have? Or he is after them? Or is that Riku? Unclear. ANYWAY the new gen girls often forget all about the pearls’ existence :D 3. Setsuna’s memories: Setsuna’s dreams have been stolen by the dream butterfly and they need to get them back, because without her dreams she has no memories and is unable to sleep. Cool! Finally a solid, easy-to-follow plot line! Except wait! Towa, who supposedly made it her goal to get Setsuna’s sleep back, forgets all about it! All the time! Like, none of them make an effort to look into this other than being like “oh yeah, know anything about the dream butterfly?” to random folks every now and then. The Inugang back in the day was putting some grad school level research towards their goals, just saying. It just feels like everything’s all wishy-washy and there’s nothing really solid tying the series together. People just remember shit exists when it’s convenient.

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Character development is MIA. I’m not expecting ground-breaking char dev in 13 episodes (though I do know 12 episode series that were phenomenal in that regard), but like... I do expect the series to focus on building the dynamics between the main three characters. So far, the series is more focused on teasing the audience with glimpses and promises of the OG cast instead. The creators are using nostalgia and bait (esp of a certain pairing) to drive interest in the series, rather than developing the new characters as fully-fledged characters for their own sakes. 

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Moroha is was the only thing I actually liked about the series. She is a little spitfire and you can somehow instantly see both Inuyasha and Kagome in her, while she also remains very uniquely herself; I have never seen such a successfully developed main pairing child in any series. She featured quite prominently in the first few episodes -- and unlike both her parents, she’s got a great memory and knowledge of lore -- where she balanced funny moments with badass fighting moments and being the token supernatural encyclopedia. It was great! And then... they’ve like... forgotten her. She’s been left behind so many times by the twins. She’s the butt of every joke. She’s become the type of comic relief that’s, well, insulting. More like a buffoon than anything else. And it’s basically all for the sake of giving the floor to Towa :/

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Setsuna is okay. Not offensive, but unremarkable. She’s got her dad’s personality but like way toned down due to her different growing up circumstances, which is nice, but like... I feel she isn’t given any room to grow or breathe or anything. She’s also basically there as a device to enhance Towa’s development.

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Towa... oy. I tried to like her, I really did, but she just doesn’t work for me. They set her up having a very Kurosaki Ichigo type deal with beating up bullies and getting into trouble at school and shit -- I’m fine with that. That’s cool. Esp if it’s linked to not feeling like she fits in bc she’s a hanyou? Awesome. Except once she travels back in time to the feudal era it’s all “Oh killing is bad you shouldn’t kill people” and “even though they attacked me I can’t possibly hurt them” and “you need to empathize and talk things out” and “friendship is magic” and shit. It feels like she had a personality transplant, it literally makes no sense. Her design is totally nonsensical too -- out of everyone at her school, she’s the only one dressed in a bright white suit? Do protags not wear the school uniform? Someone should tell Kagome lmao. She’s a pro at hand to hand, and she can absorb demons’ powers and fling them back at them like a personified Tessaiga, and she has a lightsaber sword, and she’s immune to miasma, and -- like... you get it. It’s too much. It’s way too OP for the type of universe that Inuyasha/Yashahime is set in. She’s hanyou for fuck’s sake; remember all the training Inuyasha had to go through? When he couldn’t lift his sword? When his sword attacked him? Sango, Miroku, Kagome, even Sesshomaru all had trouble with their weapons and had to work to become stronger. But Towa? Nope. Towa is straight out of the Yas Queen/Girl Boss manual, so she gets a free pass on everything.

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UGH they are doing the VLD/bad writing thing where things happen (like, BIG THINGS) and none of the characters actually react to them. Or stuff happens and there are no consequences. No one ever talks about anything. It’s wild.

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Everyone has amnesia!! :D People either don’t know or don’t remember anything or anyone. People who absolutely should know things all of a sudden magically don’t know them. Like, Kohaku -- traveled with an undead priestess, spent years in the company of demons, traveled with Sesshomaru... and yet had NO CLUE that Setsuna is Sesshomaru’s daughter or that she is hanyou, despite her living and working with his team of demon slayers all this time. Like... how, man. How. And Kaede! Don’t get me started. Since when does she perpetuate random demon-boogeyman type stories as facts? Demon children will kill each other in the nest so that only the strongest one will survive, therefore Setsuna must have killed Towa when they were infants. O_O What are they, sharks? Has she been hanging out with Kisame? Wtf?? And she’s speaking about Sess’s kids as though she doesn’t know him or anything about him, when she has had Rin under her roof all these years. It just makes. no. sense.

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Things that happened in the original series are happening again now! Because that’s the best we’ve got, recycled plot elements wooo! No, but really, characters that died or things that were resolved in Inuyasha keep coming back. Why? What was the purpose of bringing back Kinka and Ginka? To have a foil for Towa and Setsuna as twins? Someone please tell Sunrise they can just create new characters. Like, it’s one thing to have call backs to the original or cameos, references, whatever. But like... this is entire (dead) characters and interactions.

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No one knows how long it’s been since the original series ended. Fans initially heard 20 years from promo material, then “over 15″ and “10 years since” in-series regarding two different events, and now in a future episode summary we’ve gotten 18 years since Hosenki II gave Inuyasha the black pearl. But like, which black pearl? Because the one in Inuyasha’s eye doesn’t exist anymore, but Hosenki II had told Inuyasha that it would take 100 years for him to produce one. So, are we retconning that or where the fuck did it come from? Also, this doesn’t help one bit, it just confuses things even more. Back to the point, though, we have no coherent timeline or real frame of reference whatsoever, and I’m betting it’s in large part to keep the mystery of who is Sesshomaru’s wife going, as it keeps Rin’s age very vague. Everything is vague and mysterious in Yashahime, to the point where no one knows what’s going on, in fandom or in-story even. It’s kinda like how too much plot twist/shock reveal ruins a story, too much mystery does the same. It’s insane that both shippers and antis of that ship can lay equal claim that the “18 years since” announcement works in their favor.

tl;dr: Idk man, Yashahime is a clusterfuck of a series. Even if the mother of Sess’s twins is either of the characters I ship him with, I will still not like the series. There’s no saving this writing. Every episode feels like this:

[beccasbigworld]

Blog Post #1 Examining Youth Culture

I loved watching the show Euphoria the best out of all of the assigned movies and shows. It’s been something I’ve been wanting to watch for a while so I thought this was the perfect opportunity to binge the whole season. The movies and shows assigned to watch were, Euphoria, The Breakfast Club, Mean Girls, Mid-90’s and KIDS. I know... That’s so fetch, right? Throughout each film, there were tons of astounding characters, some being well known throughout society. Perhaps Regina George rings a bell to anyone? However, despite all of the fantastic characters in each work, I feel as if I identify with Rue from the show Euphoria the most. I feel the most connected to Rue because she is a young teenage girl who has to deal with mental health issues but also the fact that she has fluid sexuality. She likes men, women and just gravitates towards anyone she feels connected to. I'm part of the LGBTQ+ community so the amount of representation I felt in the show was slightly overwhelming. Especially since many older shows and films lack representation so when something arises with more LGBTQ+ representation it makes me happy. I also know how it feels to be in Rue’s shoes, especially with her relationship with Jules in the show. The whole season is a rollercoaster of Rue and Jule’s relationship and as the season progresses Rue finally takes the leap of faith and kisses Jules. **Sorry if I spoiled it for anyone** I’ve been in situations with past relationships where I liked a girl for so long but never could make the move and it was interesting to see Rue’s confidence build and I think her becoming sober helped with that aspect. An article titled The Unicorn Scale written by bi.org it discusses the different sexualities and identities of the characters in the show. It states that Rue, “Rue’s sexuality seems to be unexplored but fluid, she is clearly interested in men, women, and everyone else. Rue’s bisexuality is not shown as the cause or causing her drug addiction, it is simply another facet of who she is. Her nerves seem limited to the normal anxieties we feel for our first love” (The Unicorn Scale: Euphoria) Rue’s character also goes through many ups and downs throughout the season. She struggles with drug addiction and staying sober. She lost her Dad to cancer and had to have her younger sister find her overdosed in her room. Three common themes I’ve noticed in each of these films and shows are one, family dynamic/struggles, sex, and, coming of age moment.

The first theme, family dynamic/struggles is relatable to youth culture because growing up as a young adult or teenager can bring a lot of family issues. For example, in the movie MID90’S the main character Stevie is physically abused by his brother Ian. In one scene, Ian barges through Stevie's room in the middle of the night and punches him repeatedly. There is also no father in the picture and his mother is a single mom. So this could contribute to some of the reasons why Ian abuses Stevie. He could be taking out his anger in the only way he knows how and that’s with violence. I feel that people, especially young men struggle with dealing with their emotions and healthily expressing them. This theme also relates to me because I struggle with family issues and throughout the years it has taken a toll on my mental health. We also see in the movie KIDS the family dynamic and how it affects the main character, Telly. In one scene they show Telly’s mom taking care of the baby in their small city apartment. Telly asks for money and the mom says she doesn’t have any to give. Telly goes out and says he will be back later. The mom is so focused on the baby that she is not paying close attention to her son and what he is doing. This negatively affects Telly because he gets into the wrong group of people. This happens often without young people, it's a form of negligence that can lead people down the wrong path.

Another example is the dynamic between Nate Jacob's and his father in the show Euphoria. From a young age, Nate has been intimidated and scared by his father. In one scene, Nate’s father comes into his room and tells him how he played in the football game. Nate and his father get into a physical altercation and Nate starts to beat his head repeatedly against the floor. The second theme of sex is a big issue in most of these films and tv shows. When viewing and studying youth culture I’ve noticed how sex is a big part of a young person's life. Especially when I was in high school, sex was a majority of what people were talking about and it always mattered who was hooking up with who. I didn’t necessarily care for it and I had my experiences later in my life and at the end of the day, I don’t think it’s worth the hype and stigma around it. There are more things to do and talk about than sex. In the movie KIDS for example the main discussion of the film was sex and how the main character Telly wanted to have sex with virgins because they were seen as pure and innocent and he had the power to take that away from them. In the movie MID90s, the character Stevie has his first sexual experience and it was very real for many young people. In the scene, he starts to shake and get nervous, in an interview conducted and written by Slate Culture, asks Jonah Hill, the director of the Mid90s film, about the scene. Jonah states, “To me, showing it as harsh and as honest as it was back then was the point. You know? The point that this kid is terrified and shaking during his first sexual experience. And we get to see that as the audience. And he only gets happy and excited once he realizes it’s his currency to raise up through the group And that’s a fucked-up lesson that a lot of people now are having to unlearn from this time period And to me, I just wanted to show how that was and let the audience see that for what it is” (Bloomer) When you have your first sexual experience it can be a very nerve-wracking moment and in youth culture, the sexual experience is different for many and I believe it's split between boys and girls. As portrayed in these films for the young men, when they have sex it’s a powerful experience that boosts their confidence when they tell the group of guys they are associated with. For girls, it’s a moment that is more kept to themselves and cherished in a sense.

Being that I identify as a lesbian my experience doesn’t follow the heterosexual story so it’s interesting to me to see how the experience can be for heterosexual people. Lastly the last theme of a coming of age moment. I feel that when you are a young teen there is always this hope that you will have this coming of age moment like in the videos. I feel that Hollywood does a good job of exaggerating what a coming of age moment is for a teen. The film that is a clear example of a coming of age moment is the iconic Breakfast Club. According to the source, Movies, “The Breakfast Club (1985) is perhaps one of the best examples of a classic ‘coming of age’ plot. The film details the lives of five high schoolers stuck in a weekend detention together, only to have the misfit gang bond together despite their differences. This cast of characters are delineated by the conventional roles they fill: the Outcast, the Princess, the Jock, the Basket Case, and the Brain” (Holderbaum) The Breakfast Club shows how highschoolers defeated the stigmas and social scale of highschool. This connects to me a lot because high school was a very difficult time for me. Just like the movie we watched Mean Girls, I was at the bottom of the social ladder because I was different from a lot of people. Being a lesbian, out in highschool isn’t fun especially when you have guys who say “I can change that”. Despite the exaggeration by Hollywood with this big coming of age moment, I believe that my coming of age moment just like the Breakfast club was defeated the social ladder and being a confident, strong, lesbian at the end of my high school career.

The soundtrack of a film, TV series impacts the narrative of a story because it can uplift any emotion or feeling a character is feeling or trying to portray. The soundtrack can make or break a film/show. The soundtrack is a narrative of the story and can bring chills down your spine when watching a film. If a soundtrack is not done well the movie is not as impactive. In the movie the Breakfast club mostly everyone knows the famous song Don’t You and the iconic last scene. If it wasn’t for that song I believe the movie would not have been as famous. The playlist I made called Adolescent experience is a list of 10 songs that define me and myself growing up as a young teen trying to figure herself out. The first song on my playlist is, Electric Feel by MGMT, this song was one of the first songs that I listened to when I got my first iPod. The feeling it gave me felt like I was in an indie film when I would listen to it on long car rides. The second song on my playlist is What You Know by the Two Door Cinema Club. This song helped me with coping with my feeling of being lonely and feeling like I had no one to connect with, especially with being a young teen still stuck in the closet. The third song on my playlist is Little Secrets by Passion Pit. The band Passion Pit was one of the first bands I ever discovered and fell in love with. The fourth song I have in my playlist is 1901 by Phoenix. Anytime I listen to this song it gives me this feeling that I can accomplish anything. The fourth song is All For Us from the show Euphoria and sung by Zendaya and Labrinth. I love this song because it reminds me of the love I carry to many people in my life and how it can be tiring doing things for love all the time. The next song, Work by Rihanna is one of my favorite songs to dance to and it reminds me of a great memory of my middle school best friend Nina and me. The seventh song is Butterflies by Kacey Musgraves, this song is very meaningful to me because it's me and my girlfriend's song and it’s a reminder of the growth I have made within myself and my love life. The eighth song is Cruise by Florida Georgia Line, this was the first country band I started listening to when I was younger and the band reminds me of a very traumatic experience in my life. The ninth song is Man I Feel Like A Woman by Shania Twain. This song strikes a happy memory in my childhood because when all of my siblings were little and would be in my mom's suburban driving down the road we would sing this with her. The last song on my playlist is The Less I Know The Better by Tame Impala. This song just gives me an overall feeling of happiness and it was a song I listened to a lot when I was in a really good spot mentally.