#i've been afraid to say something but i can't keep to myself any longer || korra x asami

[letterlitter]

Blanket Warm

Lando Norris x F1 academy driver reader

Wordcount: 1k

Tags: fluff

•in which you become unwell after a racing accident and Lando is determined to take care of you.

"Two weeks off the track. Start physiotherapy on week two, then come back to see me. Hopefully you'll be back to racing in no time." The team's doctor smiled and handed you your prescription, along with a paper that said you had to rest and weren't in a condition to race.

Now you were at home all day, trying to keep yourself busy but there wasn't much to be done. Only if you'd been more careful during testing for the F1 academy. The crash wasn't that hard and it didn't ruin the car's livery much, but it sent it spinning several times to finally hit the wall, causing you to strain a neck muscle quite hard. You were okay during the check up, but how you tumbled around whith every step after getting out of bed the next morning scared you.

Lando, who had ran after you to keep you from falling, insisted to drive you to the doctor when the dizziness didn't get better after a couple of hours like you had said to convince him it's nothing. So there you were, having nowhere to go and nothing to do. Thankfully the F1 season hadn't started yet, so you and Lando had the house all to yourself after the briefing session he had to attend. Except, this was no regular holiday.

---****---

"No no, you need to sit down." Lando told you as he pulled you to the couch when he saw you stumbling while trying to make dinner. "I'll take care of things."

"Lando you can't cook" you smiled sarcastically, "I can do it."

Lando gave you a sassy side eye, "what did you say?"

"Well can you? Cook?"

He stood in a defeated silence and finally replied "okay I can't. But I can carry myself. I've got the internet and everything."

You sighed in disagreement.

"Come on babe. I am not letting you do anything. I may not be able to cook but no offence, you're not able to stand straight."

You bit the inside of your cheeks to hide your laughter.

"If you want to get better and go back soon, you have to listen to the doctor."

He waited and stared at you until you agreed. You couldn't resist those ocean blue puppy eyes anyway. And he was correct.

"Alright." You sighed, "but I will sit in the kitchen and tell you what to do."

"Oh no you won't." Lando stood up and pulled your arm to himself, threw it over his shoulder and lifted your body off the couch like firemen do; Making you squeak in surprise, "you're not doing anything but rest sweetheart. Let's get you to bed."

He finally put you on the bed, tucked you in, and you could tell moving you up the stairs was a little bit of a workout for his tiny, F1 driver arms. He didn't complain and you didn't either. It made your heart warm to see how he cared about your well being and the lengths he would go to to make sure you were alright. You were willing to do the same for him any day.

"Get some more sleep. I'll come and wake you up when everything's ready okay?"

Lando responded to your under breath "whatever you say" with a kiss on the forehead and left you to the silence of the room.

When you woke up two hours later, the smell of fried beef and cheese had came up all the way to your room. Surprisingly, it didn't smell as if something was burned or nasty.

Lando walked in all of a sudden with a big tray, pushing the door open with his back,

"Oh shit you're awake." He went right back out, making you laugh.

He came back empty handed and stood right next to your bed.

"Madam..." he helped you sit up eventhough you were capable of doing so yourself. Your head wasn't that dizzy but he still wanted to make sure everything is well.

Lando, who had wrapped a napkin around his waist stood infront of you like a waiter, "now that you are awake my dear lady, dinner will be served." He went back out and grabbed the tray he had left on the floor.

"I couldn't do a longer intro I was afraid it would get cold." And he put the tray on the bed beside you. He had made lasagna.

"Oh wow. Very well executed sir." You wanted to go along with the theme he started.

"Than you madam. Hopefully you'll like it. First..." he handed you the wet towel he had brought. He knew you hated eating before washing your hands and face after you wake up.

"Let's see." You lifted your fork and started slicing the piece.

"Hmmm, this is great Lando."

He smiled with satisfaction. You had never complimented him on his cooking before.

"It's a bit salty to be fair but how the hell did you do this?"

"My mom, a really long video call, many many dirty dishes and one broken one."

You smiled. It was the best you could ask for. Your boyfriend who cares for you, your house you could rest in, and so much comfort. Your life had been passing on such a fast track lately that you couldn't step back to appreciate the little things that were yours. This injury, how frustrating it was, had made you realize how grateful you are for the people who love you.

"What about you?" You said with you mouth half full.

"Oh I have tasted everything so many damn times I am completely full. No no really, that's all yours. My mom kept asking me to describe the taste for her like it's a competition."

You laughed "Well. I think you have won."

"I don't think you would say that if you saw what's going on downstairs."

---****---

The next 10 days went by really quickly. You were trying to get better and Lando was doing his best to keep your dizzy head entertained.

He would help you get dressed, tie your shoes, brush your hair and sit down on the couch to watch a movie with you. He would make you hot chocolate and give you your medication; and when the physiotherapy was due, he would message your neck gently like the doctor had taught him. He kept making you food and finally agreed to get some help from you when he almost burned down the kitchen.

And all he replied when you thanked him was "anything for my girl."

You finally reached full recovery a little sooner than two weeks. The doctor told you "everything seems in place. You must've had quite a good rest."

"I had a good care taker." You replied, looking at your boyfriend with a loving smile.

He really, really was one.

[mcflymemes]

FOURTH WING PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the book by rebecca yarros, adjust as necessary

a dragon without its rider is a tragedy. a rider without their dragon is dead.

i'm used to functioning in pain.

that stubborn, feisty look always makes me want to kiss you.

have you always been this tall?

if we let fear kill whatever this is between us, then we don't deserve it.

dragon relationships are absolutely incomprehensible.

tell him if he harms you, i'll scorch the ground where he stands.

i'm calling out for you.

i thought you said kissing me was a mistake.

you are the smartest of your year.

dragons always know.

funny how people rename everything that makes them feel uncomfortable.

what changed?

you make it hard to look away.

if you'd just man up and admit there's something between us, i would strip down to my skin so you could see every single inch of me.

it's hard to love a second home as much as the first.

why would you say that?

that does limit it a bit.

i am completely, utterly obsessed with [name].

even when i'm not with you, there's only you.

i can't seem to stay away.

kiling you wouldn't be any trouble.

we can live as cowards or die as riders.

i'm just not as strong as other riders.

i know exactly who and what you are.

i don't deserve you. but i'm going to keep you all the same.

strength of courage is more important than physical strength.

even temples can be rebuilt, but books cannot be rewritten.

i will not run.

you're not going to handle me?

what are you waiting for?

you turned oranges into a weapon?

thank you for being my shadow.

it's not fun if you expect it.

i am annoyingly aware of everything you do.

don't borrow tomorrow's trouble.

there is no me without you.

i wouldn't be standing here if i'd quit every time something seemed impossible to overcome.

i am the sky and the power of every storm that has ever been.

you still love me. it's possible.

i'm not afraid of hard work, especially not when i know just how sweet the rewards are.

i am infinite.

which one are you calling out for?

it's been my honor.

i'm so wildly in love with you that i can't imagine what my life would even look like without you in it.

if we're doing this, then we're starting from a place of complete honesty.

you never considered that it was you i couldn't stay away from?

coming in last is better than coming in dead.

i would rather lose this entire war than live without you.

if that means i have to prove myself over and over, then i'll do it.

you gave me your heart, and i'm keeping it.

hope is a fickle, dangerous thing.

you look all frail and breakable, but you're really a violent little thing, aren't you?

i'm going to keep you. you're mine.

thank you for being my friend.

none of this is worth it without you.

you're making us look bad. stop it.

i've been yours for longer than you could ever imagine.

lies are comforting. truth is painful.

it's just you and me in this room, and i don't share.

the right way isn't the only way.

i will not die today.

one generation to change the text. one generation chooses to teach that text. the next grows, and the lie becomes history.

you can't make me fall for you and then die.

going for blood today, are we?

[htpssgavi]

pleaseee bestfriends to lovers with gavi🙏🙏🙏

hiii!!! Sorry it took me that much to write it😭😭

Best Friends to Lovers

Gavi and y/n had been best friends for as long as he could remember. Growing up in the same vibrant neighborhood in Barcelona, they shared everything from childhood secrets to teenage dreams. Now at nineteen, Gavi was making a name for himself as a talented footballer at FC Barcelona, while y/n, eighteen, was finishing high school and making waves as a rising star in volleyball.

Their bond was unbreakable, a blend of deep friendship and mutual respect. They were always there for each other, through the highs and lows, laughter and tears. But lately, something had shifted. Gavi couldn't deny the way his heart raced when y/n was around, the way his eyes lingered on her a bit longer than before, the way her touch sent shivers down his spine.

One breezy spring evening, after a particularly exhausting match, Gavi decided to unwind with y/n. They agreed to visit their favorite spot—a quiet beach just outside Barcelona. It was their haven, a place where they could escape the world and just be themselves.

As they walked along the sandy shore, the setting sun casting a golden glow over the waves, Gavi couldn't help but steal glances at y/n. She looked more beautiful than ever, her eyes reflecting the warm hues of the sunset, her smile radiant. His heart swelled with a mixture of affection and longing he could no longer ignore.

"Do you remember when we first came here?" y/n asked, breaking the comfortable silence between them.

"Of course," Gavi replied with a smile. "We were just kids, and we thought this beach was a hidden treasure. We even made a pact to keep it our secret spot."

Y/n laughed, the sound like music to Gavi's ears. "And we've kept that promise all these years. This place still feels magical."

They found a spot near the water and sat down, the serene atmosphere enveloping them. For a while, they watched the waves gently lapping at the shore, the scene as peaceful as their friendship had always been. But tonight, Gavi felt a sense of urgency, a need to say what he'd been holding back for too long.

"Y/n, there's something I need to tell you," he began, his voice tinged with nervousness.

She turned to him, her eyes filled with curiosity and a hint of concern. "What is it, Gavi?"

He took a deep breath, his heart pounding. "We've been best friends for so long, and you've always been there for me. But recently, I've realized something… something more. I can't keep it to myself any longer."

Y/n's breath caught in her throat, her eyes widening. "What do you mean?"

Gavi reached for her hand, his touch gentle but firm. "I love you, y/n. Not just as a friend, but as someone I want to share my life with. I've been afraid to tell you because I didn't want to risk our friendship, but I can't hide it anymore."

Tears filled y/n's eyes as she listened, her heart pounding in her chest. "Gavi, I… I love you too. I've felt this way for a while but was too scared to say anything."

Relief and joy washed over Gavi as he pulled her into his arms. They stayed like that for a while, holding each other as the sun dipped below the horizon, their hearts beating in sync.

From that moment on, their relationship changed. They were no longer just best friends; they were partners, lovers, soulmates. Gavi's career continued to soar, and y/n's volleyball skills flourished, each of them supporting and inspiring the other. They traveled together, explored new places, and built a life filled with love, laughter, and countless shared moments.

Their bond, once a simple friendship, had grown into something beautiful and profound. Through every challenge and triumph, they stood by each other's side, their love growing stronger with each passing day.

And so, beneath the ever-present Catalonian sky, Gavi and y/n wrote the chapters of their love story, forever intertwined, forever in love. Their journey together was a testament to the power of love and the beauty of finding a soulmate in the most unexpected places.

[liaswills]

Pick a card: Does your crush like you back?

Today we are asking 4 seperate energies what they think of you! It's important to know that any pick a card's are general energies and some messages are resonant to your crush and others might just be for other people. Generally this is my first pick a card on Tumblr but I've been in the tarot community for longer than today, since 2017 I read tarot.

Disclaimer: I haven't used any tarot cards for this reading, ironically. I'm channelling the messages instead.

Take a moment, I understand crushes on anyone can be mind whirling and obsessive at times. But well I'm here to feed your obsession, aren't I? I will take the opportunity to channel their messages so every reply is written in the voice of your crush (general) and I'll give all four groups some extra information too!

Pick one of these four sentences from my favourite tommy shelby quotes!

1. "Why not?" — Thomas Shelby

2. "Do I look like a man who wants a simple life?" — Thomas Shelby

3. “We used to come here; she’d wait for hours for me when I couldn’t make it. And I’d wait for her if her family kept her in.” — Thomas Shelby

4. “A man needs to prove he is better than me, rather than show me his birth certificate.” — Thomas Shelby

All readings are channelled letters from your crush s/o. Hope you enjoy these and follow my account for more tarot posts!

Pile 1: "Why not?"

First of all this is a person that thinks softly of you. They have kind eyes, might be more of an effeminate person. May have a beard, or look like a gentle giant. I'm also getting blonde/brown hair or shoulder length blonde hair. They have dazzling eyes.

My darling,

I have never called you that before. But why not, eh? Or maybe I do enjoy calling you that in my mind. You are like a fond thought my mind wanders to when I am sitting in the train or my car. Or when I walk or am riding my bike. I think of you softly. I'm secretly afraid, that whilst I think of you softly, you don't think of me that way. I might just be a hopeless fool thinking you'd be interested in myself. Or perhaps I am not a fool?

I kind of want to do fun things together. Take it slow. There are some people I think of. Some other people that might be interesting to me as well. I know you didn't expect to hear that but I'm sometimes too stuck in my daydreams that I wished I was anyone's person. I just want to think of love. I like to imagine my closest friends think me an idiot everytime I say I met someone because how could they not? I sort of just 'love' being in love, right there, in my head.

Telling you how I feel makes me question whether it's worth it. Should I take that step to ask you how you're doing? To ask you whether you'd like to walk with me? Get an icecream? I don't know how to date to be honest. I read often, I just thought that thinking of you in my mind would be easier than thinking of you and I actually going someplace to do fun things together.

I specically like your legs, your smile, your hair. I think you look like my dream person. I may not smile in person, or I may not say these things in person, or I may not even let you know how HOT I think you are but you really are my type. I just don't know whether you'd think of me as 'your' type.

Sometimes I fantasize too much. I think it all out. Us, together, marriage, maybe even normal things like grocery shopping together or finding out what kind of candy you eat or don't eat. I kind of want to know how you live your life. I really admire how you come off to me as a person and I just think that we could 'be' something. If only my mind wasn't so easy to wander to other scenario's and people and friends who could possibly become my person too.

If you like me, just tell me. Right now. I beg of you. It would make my day. It would be recipocrated, I already have chosen you in my heart but I can't keep my mind collected. I can't stop thinking about work or about how busy I actually am when in truth, I just want to get to know you better.

Don't be sad. I don't want you to be sad. Was I an asshole? I never meant to be one. Trust me.

Do you trust me?

Yours Forever,

Your hopeless romantic

Pile 2: "Do I look like a man who wants a simple life?"

This is someone who has dark features. Might have brown hair. They come off as someone who has dazzling green/hazel or brown eyes. They are HANDSOME. You think of them in a handsome light. Their dress style might enchant you daily. Everytime you receive pictures of them or see them you might just think highly of their aesthetic. They're giving stronger masculine vibes or someone who has a dominant personality.

Babes,

Look I never meant to fall for you. I think my guides never saw 'me' falling for you. But I did. I was thrown into this abyss of feelings that I had long forgotten or long thought I could not feel anymore. I keep being disappointed in life but you have never disappointed me. I like that. I like that about you.

You and I talk or we don't. It's like that. I know it is. Because I keep you far away from me when I need time to make a decision. When I need to fix my shit. When I need to fix my issues. I have many of them. I don't need an angel like you to come into that mess. I don't want you to see a mess or see me as a mess. I need you to understand that I'm getting better. Really, I am. I thought I told you that, before, didn't I?

My life can never be just us. It's everything. It's mostly my family, my job, my friends. It's everything. I am always at the center of it and sometimes that makes me anxious. My friends drag me into shit you may not like. I might hurt your ideas about me when I do stuff like that, or I might be repugnant but it's just who I am, all right?

I can't be with someone who will hold me back. I am not saying you do this, but I hope that you will understand I don't really know how to be in a relationship that isn't going to end in destruction so I will put this lightly: don't give me the steer. I need you to say what you need to say and be as expressive as possible to keep me there with you. Maybe I like you, maybe I don't, I don't even know this myself.

See my guides want me to stop questioning my life. They want me to stop being such a fuck, maybe I do too. When I talk to you or when I think of you, I think of what of a redemption arc that would be for me? I know that sounds weird, but I think of how I could do 'right' by you.

So, technically, no, I don't want you to crush on me because I would not deserve you. But I also want you to be with me because I want to have you. Does that make me an asshole? I suppose it does.

Look, I know how to get you on your knees. I know how to kiss you, I'm experienced, I know. I know where to push your button, what to flirt, what to say, I do this naturally. It's like god gave me one gift and it's flirting without actually intending to flirt.

I get in a lot of trouble for that.

Like you for instance. You're my trouble. You're my death. You are the one person I can't get off my mind and it bothers me because I can't come forward to you and give you this sorry excuse of a person that I am right now. I really can't. Will you forgive me for not saying anything? If you ask me about my feelings, my love, I will most likely just ignore it or just be rude. I know, I can't have you.

You do NOT deserve me. I'm so sorry. I don't want you to want me, yet I do. Yet I thrive on it. Yet I am so sick that I would get off on it. I want you to want me, it's a game, alright? It's a game. I thrive on the thrill. I thrive on chasing. I thrive on flirting. This is a mad world and you're making it worse.

If you'd give me a chance, if by some miracle you'd be able to tame the fucktard that I am, would you be able to put up with my non-commital energy? Would you? See, you don't want this. I know you do.

My guides don't want this for you.

I'm sorry,

Your idiot.

Pile 3: “We used to come here; she’d wait for hours for me when I couldn’t make it. And I’d wait for her if her family kept her in.”

Your person is very feminine. I see someone who is shy, gives off introverted vibes or might just be a person who doesn't express what's going on with them all the time. They have a hard time texting others first, they might wait on texts instead. I feel like they are someone who thinks fondly of you.

Mr/Mrs *insert your name*,

I didn't know it could feel like this. Ha, who would've thought that, ME of all people would like you like some childish crush, though, the child in me still dreams of my shining knight. Are you that person? My shining hero, you might think I read too much fantasy novels or that I'm too obsessed with that one band, haha, I know, I am. I may talk too much about my one interest because It's all I think of. It's where I want to be, want to dream of, it's where my mind wanders and what keeps me occupied. I know you're not like that, or maybe you are, but you don't show it that easily.

I do like you. There, I said it. I want to be polite. I want to court you properly, when I do gather the courage to actually do that. I feel like somehow you might be the one person for me. Therefore, I find you irresistable. Because of that connection between us. We might already be friends, or well, we hang around one another, but I think you and I could be something more.

It had to be you. It just had to be you. That's what Barbra Streisand sings in the song "It had to be you" with Michael Bublé. I am on a cloud. Because I dream too much, I might seem like I am zoning out at times. That's what you do to me. You make me zone out and dream of many things. Sometimes my mind wanders back to those idols though, haha, or my favourite celebrities or games or book characters. But it mostly is you.

I would like to tell you how you inspire me. I am not an artistic person, but if I was, I would draw you. I would paint you. I would want to paint your soul. Does that sound too weird? Probably. See, when I think of you, I think of how you would be the most perfect thing to be laying beside me. To be holding hands with as we walk through an autumn world forest, to get a hot drink with in the cold winter, to meet up with for lunch or dinner. I think of you kindly, admiring and I hope you don't think I'm coming off too strongly on you because yes, I recipocrate this crush you have on me.

Even if you're not sure if you crush on me, I would not mind. Technically, I'm yours. I want to be yours. I might not be too responsible sometimes, I might not take the lead in things but I promise you that I can do that if you allowed me the time to adjust to you, to being around you, and not just you in my head.

I could ramble on and on about you in my head. I don't have many friends and the people I talk to I do mention you. Sometimes when I see something that reminds me of you, like something I see in a store window and I am like, you would like that shit, I'm almost tempted to buy it as a gift. I like gift giving. But I am bad with receiving it. I would really like if we could give each other book or song recommendations, maybe exchange poems. I secretly would give you a poem that explains my feelings for you, not going to lie about that.

Yeah, that's what it is. I sometimes feel like I have no appetite. I don't want to eat when I think of you. I can't get my head straight some days. And then I just focus only on stories. Books. My interests. I would like to get to know your interests too. Sometimes I worry that I am not good enough for you. Or that you would not want me. It keeps me silent. Truly.

It's stupid, I know. I might not come from a good background. My family life was not something that brought me joy and that kept me in my books and my internal world. Or it was my school but I hope that you might want to be my family.

Or is that too much? I'll convince you of how great that would be. :)

Yours truly,

*insert their name*

Pile 4: “A man needs to prove he is better than me, rather than show me his birth certificate.”

This is a soft masculine energy. He comes off hard on the outside. I am getting a definite 'he' but it could also be someone that is considered a butch energy, has macho energy or a person with very masculine energy. Technically it doesn't matter but this person has a message for you and it's coming. :) They're a bit mysterious.

My Destiny.

You feel like my destiny. You know I am a religious person, I think a certain way about life that might be philosophical, it might be faith, it just is my faith. I want you to know that when you're not around, I think of you as special. The song, I am a Creep, by radiohead, you like that one don't you?

Why do I have the feeling that you're after the bad guy. That you're after someone who looks dangerous, could be dangerous and that I would be that person for you. Why do you give me those eyes? That stare? That smirk? You're playing coy but I know that you fantasize about me like I am some devil in the sheets.

I really am not. *Snort*. Truly, you'll think of me less than that. Sometimes I worry that you think of me in a way where you're making this up. About me, information just gets distorted or you make something up in your mind that doesn't truly fit my personality. I would say that I don't mind you doing this, I think it's kind off cute. I think you're cute.

Some days, I wonder what you're doing. Only some days. Like those moments when it's night, you're sitting on the couch or in the tub and I am contemplating what to do now that my phone died (I might just be addicted to my phone) and I think of you in those moments of disconnect. I can watch the moon or I can look up at the nightsky and wonder if you're my person.

I like witches. Eh, did I say that? Yep. You're like a witch to me. Not in a bad way, more like in the way that "I know my girlfirend is a witch" vibe. You are mysterious to me. Something about you that I can't pinpoint my finger on. Something mysterious. It draws me in, but at the same time I don't want to be drawn in by you.

It's a push and pull with my feelings of my heart and my body and my mind. It's like this, I don't think you fit in my ordinairy life. You should do something with someone that fits your life. We might just be dating other people or you might feel unavailable emotionally to me, which is something I can't help but only you can, truly.

Still... I do think of you softly. In the quiet moments. My mind lingers on you. You're my favourite happy place where my thoughts can wander to. My favourite thing to relax, I don't know maybe your body is too. You know how I would love to relax with you, sweaty, together and being intimate in a way that makes you blush if I would ever talk about it nonchalantly in public day light.

I'd like to take you to a restaurant. You'd like that, huh? I know, I am smug when I think I know something about you but truly, i'm just a clueless fool wanting your attention when all but nothing you're just this goddess that could ruin me if you tried.

You don't even have to try, truly. I'm already broken, that's my secret.

I don't fear breaking my heart. So, if you do want to chase this? Chase me, darling.

I am ready.

But, let me say one more thing before I end this message. That dress, those trousers, that favourite clothing item you own, the one that looks comfortable, but isn't? Ehm, yeah, I have thought about you in that exact piece and eh- shamefully have fantasies about you wearing that fucking thing. Sorry, I get carried away when it's you, I really do.

You didn't expect this, did you? I know you think me the person you'd think is your type but you might need to re-arrange your expectations about me. I will disappoint you, I know that I will, I can't do nothing right in my life, why would I do right by you?

I sound like I hate myself. Perhaps I do.

Will you love me then, honey?

You know who I am.

Thankyou for reading this pick a card! I hope the message resonates and that you're able to enjoy this little crush reveal or did not enjoy this crush disappointment. The energies were very different and some messages aren't entirely the same but take whatever resonates, not what doesn't, if your gut feeling says those words weren't from your crush or s/o then they're not.

All the love, elias.

[chi-chistuff]

Pairings:TLOK Bolin x Female!Reader.

Summary:Bolin is Jealous of Mako because Mako is being so touchy to you. He cannot hold it so he confessed and turns out you like him too

Warnings:None

Bolin watched with a tight knot in his stomach as Mako laughed with you, his hand lingering on your shoulder a little too long. Jealousy churned within him, gnawing at his insides. He had been harboring these feelings for you for so long, but seeing you with his brother ignited a fire of envy he couldn't contain.

As he walked away, trying to compose himself, he couldn't shake the image of you smiling at Mako. It felt like a punch to the gut every time he saw you two together. But he couldn't blame Mako; he was just being himself, friendly and caring.

Unable to bear it any longer, Bolin found himself wandering aimlessly through Republic City's streets, lost in his thoughts. Eventually, he stumbled upon a quiet spot overlooking the harbor. The calming sound of the water lapping against the docks provided some solace as he tried to gather his courage.

Taking a deep breath, Bolin decided it was time to confront his feelings. He couldn't keep them bottled up any longer. With determination in his heart, he made his way back to Air Temple Island where you were staying.

When he found you sitting alone in the garden, he hesitated for a moment, nerves getting the best of him. But then he remembered the ache in his chest every time he saw you with Mako, and he knew he had to speak up.

"Hey, can we talk?" Bolin's voice was shaky, betraying his inner turmoil.

You looked up, surprised by his sudden appearance but nodded, gesturing for him to take a seat beside you.

"I... I need to tell you something," Bolin began, his heart pounding in his chest. "I've been feeling... something for you for a while now. And seeing you with Mako today... it made me realize that I can't keep it to myself anymore."

Your eyes widened in surprise, and Bolin's heart sank, fearing he had made a mistake by confessing.

"But... I feel the same way, Bolin," you said softly, a gentle smile playing on your lips.

Relief flooded through Bolin, and he couldn't help but let out a nervous laugh. "You do?"

You nodded, reaching out to take his hand in yours. "I've been waiting for you to say something, but I didn't want to push you."

Bolin's heart swelled with happiness, a weight lifted off his shoulders. He had been so afraid of ruining your friendship, but now he realized that his feelings were reciprocated.

"I'm sorry it took me so long," Bolin said, squeezing your hand gently. "I guess I was just too scared of losing you."

You shook your head, leaning in closer to him. "You could never lose me, Bolin. I care about you too much."

And in that moment, with the setting sun casting a warm glow over the garden, Bolin knew that he had found something truly special. He may have been jealous of his brother at first, but now he understood that his feelings for you were stronger than any fleeting envy. With your hand in his, he felt like he could take on the world, as long as you were by his side.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I don't know if it's just me, but do some of the events seem... I don't know... Lacking? It might just be me having high standards, but more than once it seems like there was a build up for something that didn't meet the hype, or the event simply didn't go the way I thought it should. Do you mind sharing your thoughts on this? Of course, you don't have to if you don't want to.

I don’t know how hot of a take this is, but I think most TWST events are mediocre. I'm looking for a certain type of story (ones with clear set up and pay off + actual stakes), and more often than not TWST decides to focus its events on the total opposite (being silly). I love the events where we get to visit, explore, and experience other countries, but I also fully acknowledge how dull they can be because those events are mostly eating local foods and shopping for souvenirs. Nothing wrong with stories like that, it's all just a matter of person taste. The unseriousness of events helps to balance out the meatiness of the main story, and it's nice to have that contrast.

That being said, the quality of the events is still all over the place and I think that's a natural consequence of the frequency of them. We get a new story event like every 1-2 months whereas we get a single chunk of the main story maybe once in that timeframe (or sometimes in an even longer timeframe; I still remember going more than half a year without a book 5 update). The devs may not be able to keep up the pace while also providing top tier content every single time. That's no fault of their own, it's just how the gacha model works. You need to keep pumping out new content to retain the player base and make money. We should have higher standards for the media we consume, so it's fine to critique the events and say, "it's not as good as it could have been", "this felt rushed and/or incomplete", "there was definitely a missed opportunity here", etc. What's NOT okay to do is to insult the people who worked hard on bringing the events to us. So long as you keep that mind, you're fine to express your thoughts. I'm afraid I can't really go into further detail since your initial ask was vague and did not cite any particular events you take issue with. As for myself, I know I've certainly had my fair share of complaining about how... meh... some events are. To this day, I still salt about the weird pacing and plot holes of Stage in Playful Land, the lack of satisfying payoff in Tamashina Mina, and the lack of accountability in Endless Halloween Night. I'm sure there are other events I haven't liked very much, but those are the main offenders for me.

[changbeansss]

Echos of us

Pairings: Han Jisung x reader

Genre: fluff, slow burn romance, neighbours au

Warnings: None

A/n: I was inspired by the song 'when we are together' by The 1975 hehe

You’d always been one to cherish the quiet moments in life—the soft hum of city traffic at dawn, the gentle rustling of leaves in the park, the soothing melody of your favorite songs playing in the background. Your life was a tapestry of these simple pleasures, and you were content. Then Han Jisung walked into your life, and suddenly, your world was filled with a new kind of music.

Jisung was your neighbor, living just down the hall in your apartment building. You had exchanged polite greetings and occasional small talk in the elevator, but it wasn't until the building's power went out one stormy evening that you truly connected.

You were fumbling with your keys, the hallway eerily dark, when Jisung appeared with a flashlight. "Need some help?" he asked, his voice warm and reassuring.

"That would be great, thanks," you replied, relieved to have some light.

He held the flashlight steady as you unlocked your door. "Do you want to come in for a bit?" you offered, not wanting to be alone in the dark. "I have candles and some snacks."

Jisung smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "I'd love to."

You spent that evening together, sitting on your living room floor surrounded by flickering candles, sharing stories and laughter. Jisung had a way of making you feel comfortable, his easygoing nature and quick wit putting you at ease. You discovered that you had a lot in common, from your taste in music to your love for quiet, introspective moments.

Over the next few months, your friendship deepened. You started meeting up regularly, exploring the city, going to concerts, and spending lazy afternoons in coffee shops. There was a slow, steady rhythm to your interactions, a gentle progression that felt natural and unforced.

One crisp autumn evening, you and Jisung found yourselves at a small, intimate concert. The band was playing "When We Are Together" by The 1975, and as the familiar lyrics filled the room, you felt a wave of emotions wash over you.

"You know," Jisung said softly, leaning closer so you could hear him over the music, "this song reminds me of us."

Your heart skipped a beat. "What do you mean?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He smiled, his eyes locking with yours. "It's about finding happiness in the simplest moments, about being together and feeling like that's enough. That's how I feel when I'm with you."

You felt your cheeks flush, the warmth of his words spreading through you. "I feel the same way," you admitted, your voice trembling with emotion.

As the song played on, you both fell silent, lost in the music and the unspoken feelings between you. It was a slow burn, a gentle unfolding of emotions that had been building for months.

One evening, as winter began to set in, you and Jisung were walking through the park, the ground covered in a thin layer of snow. The air was crisp, your breath visible in the cold.

Jisung stopped and turned to you, his expression serious yet tender. "There's something I need to tell you," he said, his voice steady but filled with emotion.

You felt your heart race, the anticipation building. "What is it?"

He took a deep breath, his eyes searching yours. "I've fallen in love with you," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't want to rush things, but I can't keep it to myself any longer."

Your heart swelled with joy and relief. "I've fallen in love with you too, Jisung," you replied, your voice trembling with emotion. "I was afraid to say anything because I didn't want to ruin what we have."

Jisung's face lit up with a smile, his eyes sparkling with happiness. "You could never ruin this," he said softly, taking your hands in his. "This is just the beginning."

As you stood there, hand in hand, you felt a sense of contentment and excitement for the future. You knew that your relationship with Jisung was built on a foundation of genuine connection and mutual respect. It was a slow burn, a love that had grown and deepened over time, and you were ready to embrace it fully.

"When We Are Together" played softly in your mind, the lyrics resonating with the journey you had taken together. In a world that often moved too fast, you had found a love that was patient, steady, and true. And in that moment, you knew that as long as you were together, everything else would fall into place.

[feefymo]

Omg loved this fic game =D

Let's go:

Kit Walker

Spanking kink

Third element: coping mechanism after Briarcliff

Dear anon, hi! I hope this time is the right time: I've been trying to post the fic based on your three requests since I still had baby teeth but Tumblr says "nuh-uh". Fingers crossed and let's have some fun!

"Nnnnot again. Enough, fuck... !" You heard Kit hiss through clenched teeth - so clenched he could have cracked them - so you stopped what you were doing and a shiny string of your saliva broke. For the first few seconds you had a bewildered expression but it didn't last long because you knew the problem. So, worry set in. The anguish of seeing your husband perpetually frustrated, so exasperated that you feared he might become seriously ill at any moment. You timidly raised a hand to your mouth and wiped it away as you peered at his tense form in the grass of your yard. July set Massachusetts on fire and so did you who lived there. For his part, Kit was sweating but not because he was enjoying the summer or your skimpy attentions. You, now kneeling between his legs, silently observed his sore and reticent sex as you pressed your tongue against the taste that remained in your mouth. It had never been easy between you two.

When he was free to leave Briarcliff there was no shortage of skeptics but you - who knew him from before - had never, ever doubted his innocence. You had loved him before he could even discover it and your dream of being loved back had come true. Obviously, Kit Walker was no longer the carefree, heartthrob boy he once was but you didn't care. The problem with sex had emerged almost immediately after he returned to "normal" and the thing that really drove him crazy was the fear that you didn't think he was involved enough. He never failed to satisfy you, no man had ever considered you with such concern but he... he was stuck. Stuck in the loop of some trauma he suffered that he didn't talk about. And you didn't dare ask. You just wanted to see him more peaceful. "My love..." you started in a syrupy voice before being interrupted by his fist tearing a tuft of grass. Kit let out a lamentation and shook his head before sitting up and looking at you with desperate, shaded eyes. The irises melted like chocolate on his sharp features. "No, come on. Don't tell me it doesn't matter, don't tell me it will be better next time. Don't tell me not to force myself, please." yet another demonstration that he knew you and listened to you, you closed your mouth and sighed. You made sure you had permission and caressed his cheek, a gesture he appreciated and settled against. He closed his eyes for just a moment. "I love you, I'm tired of... I need reciprocity, complicity but the problem is me. I'm a broken toy now, aren't I?" as it rarely did, your expression hardened and you had to grab onto your skirt to dispel your anger. "Don't you dare call yourself "broken", that's unfair. Did you hear me, Kit Walker? Never again." and Kit knew you didn't see him the way he saw himself but that biting severity hit him. It disoriented him because... he liked it. He stared at you with a vaguely lost look, while a monster now familiar to him mounted in his chest. He had been suppressing it since the moment you had met again but he was struggling to keep it at bay and his member hinted at his secret. It pulsed, forcing Kit to palm it. "Y/N, you see, I..." he was torn, you could see it in him. "Kit, together we will get through this too. Okay? But I can't keep quiet if you denigrate yourself like this. I just want you too to experience the well-being that you are able to give me. I want to make you feel good, there's something on your mind. .. can it work? Maybe you don't want to tell me, are you afraid that I will judge you? That it'll scare me?" at that point, Kit just flinched, as if he had actually been caught killing a poor woman in a brutal way. This made you realize that yes, there was something but he had never allowed it to surface. "Fine. I don't know if it's the solution, don't..." he sighed "Come with me. Let's go back to the kitchen." The house was burning and so was the wait your husband was subjecting you to. He needed to find the right way to communicate and you would put him at ease so, standing still, you began to drop your blouse and skirt onto the clean floor. Dressed only in lingerie with sage green embroidery, you caught Kit's lustful gaze, which resembled a hybrid between a free beast and a weak prey. In captivity. "Holy God, suga': you're breathtaking, I don't deserve you." "Kit." you took half a threatening step forward, showing a certain vehemence towards his victimhood. He wasn't interested, he wasn't mortified, on the contrary: he looked you up and down as if dazed. The right hand rubbing on the open fly of his jeans.

"Tell me how to make you come, Mr. Walker. Now." Now cornered, Kit bowed his head and swallowed dryly. He didn't say a word until he had a broom in his hand which, shortly after, he passed to you. "Take it." he murmured, unable to hide a veil of shame. You hesitated for a moment but then complied, studying the object. “As you know, in Briarcliff I took corporal punishment. I took it often, so often that… something clicked. I had to defend myself, survive. Y/N, I started to like the caning. I hated it, and yet… my body reacted with enthusiasm. Perhaps this..." The more Kit explained, the more you regretted having imposed yourself so confidently. Did he want you to cause him pain? Was that the way to fix the mechanism? "You're scared, I understand. You don't have to, there's a reason I never asked." "It... it's not healthy. I would never want to see you suffer, if I indulge you I contribute to..." you took a breath, left the sentence hanging. You both knew everything that even silence conveyed. "Go to the table and lean on it. Turn around." suddenly, you changed voice in a calm but merciless tone: you were giving brief orders. For a moment, Kit had to store your words but a gasp writhed in his throat and he hurried to comply. "Take down your pants and underwear." you moved barefoot, it was almost impossible to hear. "Moreover." you grabbed onto his jeans and tugged at them, causing your husband to exhale violently through his nostrils. Now, he was staring at you over his shoulder and his eyes were shining pleadingly. He breathed violently and, in a certain sense, you too followed that syncopated rhythm. "Punish me. Punish me for all the times I couldn't get inside you. That I couldn't stay there. Please." you despised that compromise, and yet, the idea of ​​reaching a solution entered your core and made it crackle. You didn't know the practice but you were tired of waiting and Kit looked like he was about to implode, so you passed the broom handle over Kit's buttocks with the delicacy of a Judas kiss. Then, without warning him, you loaded the blow and dealt it to him. While you jumped in fright, he arched up moaning darkly. He seemed absurdly… relieved. With his hands wide open on the wood in search of balance, the man nodded vigorously and you caned him again. This time, his legs trembled and an animalistic cry pierced the daytime heat. Now resting on his elbows, he whispered darkly, "M-more." annihilated by the scenario in front of you, you were the victim of widespread tingling. Your panties had become soaked without you realizing it. It wasn't the violence that excited you but the way Kit reacted to that. "Are you...are you getting wet? You're wet, I can see it from here." yet another blow came unexpectedly, immediately followed by a soothing: "ssssh...". Breathless, with his eyeballs rolling to the ceiling, Kit had to press his cock against the table. The live, pulsating erection was in need of the friction that Kit found in contact with the support that endured his weight. "God, my God, suga', how do you do it... get Sister Jude out of my fuckin' head. Again. Again!" teeth sealed in a roar and fingers scurrying off his tank top as your pussy cried out hungrily. You came closer and touched the reddened flesh and then tightened it in a vice that forced Kit to bark in pain and pleasure. He quickly brought his hand to his length and ran along it with uncontrolled ardor but, victim of yet another beating, he had to go back to holding on to the table.

Now bent at a right angle with one cheek on the surface, he was panting uncontrollably and you were unable to resist the temptation: you grabbed onto his hips and pushed yourself against his ass. “Oh, fuck… fuck, Y/N I’m about to come… ff-…” Kit, in the throes of adrenaline, found the strength to turn around and pounce on you. You both fell to the floor, kissing as if you were going to bite each other off while he dodged the obstructing fabric and entered you without grace.

He filled you with such voracity that an incredulous, breathless laugh left your jaws. Kit was destroyed, distraught, a toxic flame that hit you with its impetuosity. "Yes... yes, my love, yes... do it hard! Strong as my sti-AH!" your husband, firm on his knees, sucked in his lower lip, holding your hips as he slipped out of you to re-enter with even more urgency. "Jesus Christ, Y/N, I have to fill you..." and on the last letter, the thrusts of that brief embrace became frantic, taking both of you by surprise with a stunning orgasm. An expression of disbelief built on Kit's face. His eyelids narrowed and his Adam's apple threatened to tear his throat open as the hot spurts of his seed invaded you as promised. The lips swollen and wide open in a silent cry. Desperate and euphoric. He soon leaned over you, grabbing your breasts as he continued to move and slide into you. You, who didn't remember the sensation and who, entranced by the mere image of Kit, had the impression of going crazy with ecstasy. Coming, clinging to the soft curls of the love of your life, you trembled with such force that it nauseated you. Tightly wrapped around his veiny cock, you had never reached such a climax and neither did he.

[darkkitty1208]

on fic writing and fandom: where am i going forward?

So. It's a bloody dull Friday and I'm writing this post--have been meaning to, for a while--because I can't stop thinking about it. It's just a few (a lot, actually) thoughts I've had in my mind the past few days that I've decided to spill into a single post, which turned out far longer than it needed to be, but nothing too important. Under the cut.

I've been a fanfic writer for a while now. Not a long time by any means, but a while nonetheless. My first fic--which is now orphaned like a few of its brothers for undisclosed reasons, though if you're an og you might be able to guess why--was dated back to the 18th of November 2021. 3 years later and I've got a humble 89 works and counting (the orphaned works and unposted wips unincluded). I can safely say I've improved quite a lot since then.

Where are you going with this, then, Kitty? Surely you aren't here just to brag about your writing progress?

Well. Not exactly. But I'll start with this: I guess what I'm trying to say is I've lost the spark.

You know. The old feeling. That boost of serotonin you get after you finish a piece you're proud of, or when you get lovely reviews on ao3, or when you get a kudos email, or a new mutual, or some wild tags under your silly post. The spark. I haven't felt it in a long time, now. The last time it's been so palpable was... I'm not sure. Probably last year's October. That was a lot of fun. I was most prolific in fic writing, that year. It shouldn't feel like a long time ago. Because it wasn't.

Don't get me wrong. I love all this. All that's going on right now. The comments I'm getting--even if fewer than I had before--and all the other interactions, I appreciate and enjoy and love them so, so much. And writing my newer fic projects are well exciting. But it just isn't the same anymore. I'm afraid it never will be.

(Maybe it has something to do with the lack of interactions lately. Maybe? I don't really know, either. I'm sure we're all well aware the fandom is past its peak, and with the current developments in the MCU I am frankly unsurprised, but I dunno.)

I guess that's part of the reason I've been less active lately. I've been inactive as a whole this year, admittedly, and disappearing far too often for far too long (and I notice some of my friends are, too). I just didn't get the same joy from being in a fandom like I had when I first started this blog, or my ao3 account.

In hindsight, I've probably been a little too dependent on fandom to provide me serotonin. The past few years have been hard, the years before that, too. Life just keeps kicking me in the arse time and time again. I guess I've been using fandom and fic writing as a coping mechanism, and once I've had my fill, the joy dies off to something a little more dull. Like a gum I've been chewing for too long that the sweetness has since worn off.

Honestly? I don't want it to be this way. I want to live without being so dependent on my presence online. I want to live without only knowing joy through internet interactions. I've got to learn to. It sounds silly, but it's true. (I think I may be slightly chronically online, oh no. x'D)

So naturally my first instinct is to distance myself a little. I contemplated quitting, but I can't do that. I don't see myself ever doing that, no matter how many times my brain convinces me that I might.

When this year started, I had set some goals for writing. One of them was to write for more whumptober prompts than I did last year or complete them all. I did like 21 prompts or something last year. Of 31. Within a little more than a month. While still balancing all the life stuff I had going on. This is, if not obvious, an extremely ambitious goal. I am not insane. I don't know what I was thinking. I can't possibly do that now, can I? Not with all the stuff that's been happening.

...

Can I?

...

Yeah, no. Definitely not.

See, that's another thing: writing. Probably the thing I'm trying to get at in this post but otherwise derailed completely from. Fuck my brain.

I'm sure many of you have noticed that I've been writing significantly less. I still post, obviously, but not as much as like, last year when the number of works I had went from a few to far too much. That had helped me improve quite a lot, actually, but those days I barely slept because I just insisted to replace my sleep time with Writing Shit For The Gays. It was pretty unhealthy now that I look back at it. My sleep schedule is still shit now but, yk. Some things just never change.

I was really, really caught up on wanting to be good at writing. Like, really good. I wanted to make awesome things. I wanted to write like a real fucking pro. Like all the more popular fandom authors I look up to. I want to be like the big dogs in fandom. It sounds so silly. I did everything; sprinting daily, setting a minimum of 500 words writing sessions every day, trying new writing styles, churning out works after works, writing for prompts and events and gifts and the like. I was enjoying it, yes, but was it really something I did for myself? Or was it because I wanted to please other people or impress other people for their validation, which is something I'm entirely too dependent of? Was it for the numbers?

Well. It was more for that than for me, I realised a little too late.

So yeah. Fuck wanting to be good. I want to write for the hell of it. I want to write something that's for me. Not what the majority of the fandom or other people want to read, but for me. Which is why I absolutely loved writing works like just a matter of time, how to kill a god, or how to become a god, because they're not meant for other people but myself. (Ironically that last work is a gift but, yk. I still liked it.) I know I joke about self-projecting a lot, but it's been seriously helping me rediscover the joy of writing that doesn't come from the incessant need to be good or perfect or focus on producing more and more and more. It makes me feel like a kid again. Also, I'm only realising this now but I'd rather get like 5 people who enjoy reading my works so much and express them to me rather than 100 people who silently thumbs up at me and then go away to consume another fic or demand more. (All this to say I still love interactions, it just shouldn't be my no. 1 priority to get them when writing fanfics.)

But yeah. None of those works are perfect. They're not meant to be. But they're mine. They're me. They represent me. And it's so, so great to feel that in writing. I've been so stuck up on being some sort of content machine. I'm doing this for myself, how could I forget? I've been saying this since the beginning, I don't know why I'm still struggling to do it. God. It's ridiculous.

Anyway. That's that. This has become a very long ramble. Thank you for listening to my Ted Talk. And for letting me waste your time, if you make it to the end of this post.

[jaysbraindump]

Dead Boy Detectives characters as Sleeping At Last songs: a very long post

Edwin – Nine

Who am I to say what any of this means I have been sleepwalking Since I was fourteen Now as I write my song I retrace my steps Honestly, it’s easier To let myself forget Still, I check my vital signs Choked up, I realize I’ve been less than half myself For more than half my life

Wake up Fall in love again Wage war on gravity There’s so much worth fighting for you’ll see Another domino falls Either way It looks like empathy To understand all sides But I’m just trying to find myself Through someone else’s eyes So show me what to do To restart this heart of mine How do I forgive myself For losing so much time?

Charles – Eight

I wanna break these bones 'til they're better I wanna break them right and feel alive You were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong My healing needed more than time When I see fragile things, helpless things, broken things I see the familiar I was little, I was weak, I was perfect too Now I'm a broken mirror But I can't let you see all that I have to lose All I've lost in the fight to protect it I can't let you in, I swore never again I can't afford to let myself be blindsided I'm standing guard, I'm falling apart And all I want is to trust you Show me how to lay my sword down For long enough to let you through

Here I am, pry me open What do you wanna know? I'm just a kid who grew up scared enough to hold the door shut And bury my innocence But here's a map, here's a shovel Here's my Achilles' heel I'm all in, palms out, I'm at your mercy now and I'm ready to begin I am strong, I am strong, I am strong enough To let you in

Crystal – Smell

Is this the part where the brain scan shows where memories reside? Some ambiguous shape in me, suddenly producing light Triggered like a trip wire every time I breathe it in Isn't it strange that a lilac tree is what unlocks where I've been? Like a time machine rebuilds the past My memories return Like remembering the ashes before they burn It is the friction that lights a match Desperate attempts that make it last So I hold my breath for as long as I can But before long, the wind swells in I started a fight I could never win But I will hold on as long as I can

Niko – Some Kind of Heaven

I'm having trouble sleeping Keep thinking my phone's ringing I wake in a panic, what's wrong now? Nervous system's acting up I'm worried it's forever messed up Now being awake feels unsafe Please, help me remember The voice of my mother Reminding me everything's okay

She deeply believed it

Just a little longer Everything will make sensе Broken things will be remadе But what about the meantime? How do I ignore the signs That one day, everything I love will fade?

Monty – Wave After Wave

Wave after wave, I'm more afraid It's been a hard year, it's been a high tide I can make it make sense, but my body decides I keep telling myself again and again It's been a hard year, healing takes time Routine test results, I'm probably fine I know better I know better But it doesn't really matter My body decides One part at a time I am the sail, the plank The mast that breaks and gets replaced I am remade, repaired, reshaped But somehow still the same Even after every cell in my body changed I know my name

Jenny – Homesick

You spend your whole life Just to remember the sound When the world was brighter Before we learned to dim it down Call it survival Call it the freedom of wills; Where breath is borrowed Our compass needle stands still Our resignation only comes on beaten paths

When the world was flat We dreamt of its edges… If love’s elastic, then were we born to test its reach? Is it buried treasure Or just a single puzzle piece

The Cat King – To Be Enchanted

I see longing in its eyes I can't quite put my finger on it There's just something about its face That makes me sad It's as much afraid as it's haunted I've never related more To anything or anyone before I can't explain it Politely, I asked, "Are you real?" It said, "Here, let me prove it" It placed its hand in my hand And neither one of us could feel it "Don't kill the messenger", it begged "You're alive, quit acting like you're dead" Like a mirror, it spoke so clear "Don't you recognize the reason why you're here?"

[loulislife]

I can't get the silver(y) dress out of my head that Eve wore to the `house of the dragon` season 2 premiere. So this is what my mind made out of it:

The grand hall of Queen Luna’s castle in Solaria was adorned with twinkling fairy lights and banners of deep blue and gold. The evening air was filled with the soft murmur of conversation and the gentle strains of orchestral music. Nobles and dignitaries from across the realm mingled, their laughter and chatter creating a vibrant symphony. The stone walls of the ancient castle, lit by hundreds of flickering candles, seemed to glow with a golden warmth.

Farah Dowling stood near one of the tall arched windows, looking out at the moonlit gardens below. The silver gown she wore shimmered like liquid starlight, each movement creating ripples of light that danced across the fabric. Her blonde hair was styled in soft waves, cascading over her shoulders and catching the light just so. She wore a simple yet elegant necklace and matching earrings, which sparkled as brightly as her gown. Farah exuded an air of calm grace, but her heart was a tumultuous sea of emotions.

Saul Silva entered the hall, his eyes immediately searching for her. When he spotted Farah, he froze for a moment, the breath catching in his throat. She looked like a vision, ethereal and otherworldly, and he found himself unable to tear his gaze away. Saul had always admired her strength, her wisdom, and her beauty, but tonight she seemed to outshine everything else in the room.

Farah turned, sensing his presence, and their eyes met. There was a brief moment of surprise, followed by a warmth that spread through her chest. She offered him a small, genuine smile, and he returned it with a lopsided grin, his heart pounding in his chest. Saul approached her, each step slow and measured, as if he were afraid the moment might shatter if he moved too quickly.

"Saul," Farah greeted him, her voice soft and melodic. "You look dashing tonight."

He chuckled, feeling slightly self-conscious in his formal attire. "And you, Farah, look... breathtaking."

A blush colored her cheeks, and she looked away, momentarily overwhelmed by the intensity in his gaze. They stood in silence for a few moments, the unspoken feelings between them hanging heavy in the air.

"Would you care to dance?" Saul asked, holding out his hand.

Farah hesitated for just a heartbeat before placing her hand in his. "I would love to."

As they moved to the center of the hall, the other guests seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of them and the music. Saul placed a hand on her waist, and she rested hers on his shoulder. Their movements were slow and fluid, the dance a silent conversation of longing and affection.

Saul's eyes never left hers, and he found himself lost in the depths of her gaze. "Farah," he began, his voice barely more than a whisper, "there's something I've been meaning to tell you."

Her heart skipped a beat, and she nodded slightly, encouraging him to continue. "Yes, Saul?"

He took a deep breath, gathering his courage. "I've... I've been in love with you for a long time. I didn't know how to say it, and I was afraid it might change things between us, but I can't keep it to myself any longer."

Farah's breath caught in her throat, tears welling up in her eyes. "Saul, I..."

Before she could finish, he continued, "You don't have to say anything. I just needed you to know. You're the most incredible person I've ever met, and I can't imagine my life without you."

She smiled through her tears, her heart feeling as if it might burst with joy. "Saul, I love you too. I always have."

He pulled her closer, their foreheads touching as they swayed to the music. The rest of the world fell away, leaving just the two of them in that moment, finally free to express the love they had both kept hidden for so long.

As the dance ended, they remained in each other's arms, the unspoken promise of a future together filling the space between them. In the castle of Queen Luna, under the watchful eyes of the moon and stars, Farah Dowling and Saul Silva had finally found their way to each other.

[mlove44lh]

Don’t hurt yourself

Chapter 3 - Anger

Masterlist

Previously chapter

Warnings: cheating, angst, mention of infertility, mention of blood and hospital (really short), alcohol use.

Lewis is a real asshole in this chapter, I think that could go as a warning too.

Words: 2.750

“If it's what you truly want ... I can wear her skin over mine. Her hair over mine. Her hands as gloves. Her teeth as confetti. Her scalp, a cap. Her sternum, my bedazzled cane. We can pose for a photograph, all three of us. Immortalized ... you and your perfect girl. I don't know when love became elusive. I think of lovers as trees ... growing to and from one another. Searching for the same light.

Why can't you see me? Everyone else can.”

I step slowly into the apartment, my head spinning with the anger I feel and all the alcohol from earlier. The place seems different from what I had left before, the white walls filled with memories in the form of our photos no longer bring me the comfort and happiness they used to.

I can hear Lewis' footsteps in the hallway outside. I take a deep breath, preparing myself for the imminent confrontation I can no longer postpone.

Lewis slams the door behind him with enough force for the sound to reverberate throughout the apartment.

"Stop with this silent treatment bullshit. You ignored me all night. Isn't that enough?!” His voice is louder than usual.

I place my bag on the wooden dining table and turn towards Lewis, who is standing in the middle of the room with his jaw clenched and his eyes fixed on me.

"I told you this conversation would happen at home.” I feel the anger burning in my throat. I seem calm, but I grit my teeth over so many emotions stuck inside me.

"Here we are." He gestures to the entire living room. "Now, can you tell me what the hell is going on? First, you've been acting weird all week. Then at dinner, you didn't say anything except to make senseless comments. You drank two bottles of champagne alone, even though you know you can't drink. Do you want to throw away all the treatment we're doing?”

Suddenly, I can't contain my emotions any longer. I explode with words that should never leave my mouth. My laughter is a humorless, painful groan. How can he bring this up now? How dare he act like nothing is happening? After cheating on me, he still has the audacity to want to build something big together?

"Fuck this treatment, Lewis! I have no interest in conceiving a child with you anymore!" I scream at him for the first time in my life, and say the worst things I could.

You know that feeling when you regret saying something even before the last word leaves your mouth? That just happened. The pain in Lewis' face becomes clear before my eyes, but it's not greater than mine. I could never imagine saying those words to him. To the love of my life.

Lewis stays quiet, motionless, as if he's glued to the floor. Like him, I try to process the words I just uttered. I don't know where they come from, or if I really feel that way. But I don't move to take them back or try to retract what I said. I think this is the moment I'll remember as the breaking point. There's no turning back after saying something like that.

But life is made of choices, and I choose to move forward with my anger.

I walk to my bag, and for a brief moment, the sound of my heels hitting the floor is the only thing that can be heard in the room.

I take out the bracelet that I've kept with me all this time, and walk up to him with the object clenched tightly in my fist.

I walk close enough to hear his breath. His eyes shine with sadness. I can't recognize us at this moment. Everything seems so wrong, so confusing. We know each other so well, but now I feel like I'm looking at a stranger.

I feel a lump in my throat, and for a moment, I'm afraid that I'll break down.

"I stopped taking the hormones five days ago, Lewis. You would know that if you paid any attention to me.” He keeps his eyes locked on mine, and I can identify an appeal in them. "I stopped when I found this in your car.”

I hold out the bracelet with my index finger near his face. I watch realization taking over his expression while his gaze moves between my face and the object in my hands. He seems to want to say something, but I don't want to hear a word from him until I finish saying everything I need to.

"The problem was there for a long time, wasn't it? It was my love for us that blinded me and didn't let me see what was right in front of me. Until this shit showed up" I throw the bracelet at his chest. Despite the almost zero distance between us, I know that Lewis barely feels the metal contact his skin. He remains motionless. The bracelet falls between us, resting on the cold floor as we continue to stare at each other. "I tried to deceive myself. Even today, I was willing to give you the benefit of the doubt and let you make up for everything you destroyed in me."

I feel my eyes welling up, but there's more anger than sadness in the tears.

"Y/n..." Lewis' voice comes out in a tone that I don't remember ever hearing before.

I cut him off before he can say another word.

“But then I arrive there, at the dinner you invited me to.” I extend my index finger until it touches his chest, and just this minimum contact makes me tremble. “And I watch you looking at her in the same way you used to look at me. And the worst of all is that you were acting as if nothing was happening. You wore this lie so well that if she hadn't done what she did to show me the truth, I would have left that restaurant even more in love with you. While you were lying to the woman you swore loyalty to on an altar."

His fingers wrap carefully around my wrists. I try to pull away the moment I feel the contact, but Lewis doesn't let go and keeps holding me in my place.

"Y/n. Please listen to me.”

I don't want to listen to him, but I know I need his explanation.

"Go ahead. But tell me the truth if you still want the slightest consideration from me.”

It takes him a few seconds to start talking.

"It's true. But it didn't mean anything, not for a moment. It was the biggest mistake of my life, Y/n. And I know that doesn't change anything about what I did. But I'm so sorry." He puts word upon word as if his desperation could change something. "I'm sorry. I was selfish and in a bad place, and she came along and seemed so simple. I didn't think about you or us. But I swear there's nothing left. I realized what was at stake and ended everything.”

It's not a “this never happens” or “you misunderstand” the only thing I get is an apology.

Even though it was already clear, hearing it from him manages to hurt even more. His dark and guilty eyes look at me with such supplication that even staring back at him becomes a difficult task.

"When did this start?”

Lewis lowers his gaze as soon as I finish my question, perhaps out of shame or fear of my reaction to the answer.

"September.”

I break free from his grip as soon as it sinks in.

"You were fucking her while I was going through that hell?!”

I watch tears streaming down his face, but I feel no sympathy. What I want now is for him to suffer even more for the consequences of what he caused himself.

“It was a hard time for me too.”

"No." It's unbelievable that he's playing that card now. "You're not going to do this to me. Not after everything I went through.”

"But it's the truth. We were both living in hell." He says barely a second after I finish speaking.

"And your way of dealing with that was by cheating on me?!” My voice comes out in a scream for the second time tonight.

The adrenaline inside me is so intense that I can't stand still. I take a few steps back from his figure.

"Y/n, you've changed since the diagnosis." The forced laugh that comes out of me is the only thing I can express. "You think I was the one who distanced myself when, in fact, you had already been distant for a long time. You looked at me as if I were to blame for..." He trails off, regret etched on his face the moment he falls silent.

It's like a knife has been plunged into my chest. Even before he finishes, I already knew where this was going.

"Finish it. Tell me, Lewis. Tell me that I looked at you as if you were to blame for my infertility."

"That's not what I meant."

"Yes, it is. It's written all over your face."

"No. I meant because of the situation we were in."

I shake my head as I stare at Lewis incredulously.

"How callous and self-centered does a person have to be to make this kind of deduction?" My voice is low, and the words spill out without much forethought. "I bled for hours, only to receive the most devastating news of my life shortly after. I left that hospital and rebuilt myself piece by piece to try to move on. And during that process, you believed yourself to be too important to not receive the attention you craved and went after that whore to stroke your ego."

Lewis tries to approach me, but I move away as soon as I realize his intention.

"Get away from me!"

"Y/n, please. I would never do that. That's not what I meant. I just want you to understand.”

"There's nothing to understand! What you did has no explanation.”

I turn my back to his figure as I feel tears streaming down my face. I wipe my face with my hands, trying not to let him see me cry. The tears are not just about what he did, it's about everything we went through together. It's about me thinking I had someone on my side who understood me and would never do this to me. But now life feels more raw than ever, and I feel alone. The pain is intense and the feeling is that it will never go away. I feel vulnerable, exposed, and very angry.

I'm not sure I can stand, so I walk over to the couch and sit on the edge of the white cushion. I feel the comfort of the upholstery in contrast to the tension in my body. As I try to calm down, Lewis comes to me and kneels on the floor, putting himself at the same height as me.

Lewis takes some time before speaking again.

"Listen. I love you so much. And I know what I did may be unforgivable. But Y/n, we have been through so much together. I really want to fix this. I don't want to give up on us.”

I don't look at him.

"But you've already done it.”

"No. I made a mistake. The biggest one, but I will never give up on us. I'll do whatever it takes, please.”

My eyes flicker towards him, but I can't bear to hold his gaze for more than a fleeting moment. It's as if looking at him for any longer would be a betrayal to the pain and anger that I feel.

"If only you had been honest. But you lied. That's even worse. You acted like everything was fine when you had just admitted that everything was wrong even before you got involved with her." Lewis wraps his fingers around my ankle as if hoping to change my thoughts with just that touch. "You promised me that whenever something went wrong, we would talk about it. And when it did happen, you just ran away from me. How do you expect me to forgive you for that?"

"Please," he begs me for something that not even he knows.

"I'm going to pack my things."

"No. Y/n, don't do that."

I stand up but can't take more than one step. Lewis comes to me and rests his hands on my shoulders, keeping me in place. I feel exhausted. I think I have no more strength to keep going with this. I've reached my limit tonight, and so has he.

"Stay. This house is yours. I'll sleep in the guest room, but please don't leave. We can talk tomorrow when we're both calmer. Let's give ourselves tonight to think.”

"I've spent the last month thinking. I have nothing else to think about. I don't want to talk to you anymore, Lewis. I don't want this anymore.”

"Y/n, please. It's three in the morning. You have nowhere to go now. Stay here. You don't have to talk to me, but I don't want you driving like this in a nervous state."

His concern seems like a joke, it might have moved me if we weren't in this ridiculous situation.

"If I stay, you're the one who leaves.”

“Y/n...”

“Get your stuff.”

“Where am I supposed to go?”

“I don´t know. I don´t care. Go to her place. Take the opportunity to let her know that you're single now.” I go to the cellar and take the first bottle of wine I find there. “Just be careful with Matteo, he might kill you if he finds out you're fucking his little bride.”

Lewis stares at me for a few seconds before heading towards the bedroom. He knows I can't handle another minute of conversation tonight. Now the only thing I want is distance from him.

I open the wine bottle and pour a glass with a surprising calmness. Perhaps my level of stress and shock is so high that I no longer know how to deal with it.

With the bottle in one hand and the glass in the other, I walk to my office and close the door behind me. I don't want to see him leave, trying to convince myself that it's because I don't want to look at him anymore, but in truth I'm afraid of not letting him pass through the door.

I take every sip of my drink as a desperate attempt to calm my emotions. I am sitting in the armchair in the middle of the dark room, and I can hear every step Lewis takes just a few meters away from me. Sometimes, I can even tell which room he is in.

But then, after a short while, I hear the final thud - the sound of our apartment door closing. And suddenly, silence fills the room, bringing with it an intense cold.

I want to allow myself to cry in this moment, but I can't. Exhaustion takes hold of my body and mind, but I know I won't be able to rest until I know what will happen with us.

Author's notes: CALM DOWN, DON'T FREAK OUT. I'll post chapter 4 soon. I promise it won't take as long as this one did.

Let me tell you, it was a struggle to write this one. I spent hours just to write a few words. It was definitely the hardest one yet.

I kinda feel bad for making Lewis such a asshole. He's like my baby, you know? But hey, we still have a few more chapters left, so who knows what could happen? (Not even I know, haha.)

Anyway, thanks for sticking around and i see you in the next one!

[justanotherrpmeme]

Love Confession starters

"I've been wanting to tell you something… I'm in love with you."

"You… you feel the same way? I've been falling for you too."

"I've been keeping this to myself, but I can't hide it anymore. I love you."

"I'm in love with you too."

"I don't know how you'll react, but I can't deny it anymore. I'm in love with you."

"I never thought I'd feel this way, but I'm completely in love with you."

"I've known for a while now…"

"I'm scared you won't feel the same way, but I have to be honest… I'm in love with you."

"I've been in love with you for longer than I can remember."

"I want to be with you."

"I never believed in love until I met you."

"I was afraid of losing our friendship, but I can't deny it anymore—I'm in love with you."

"Our friendship means everything to me, and now I realize… I'm in love with you too."

"I've never felt this way before, but I can't ignore it. I love you, and it scares me."

[text]: Hey, there's something I've been meaning to tell you…

[text]: I can't keep it a secret any longer. You make my heart race every time I see you.

[text]: I've been trying to find the right words, but all I can say is that I'm completely and utterly in love with you.

[text]: I've been keeping this to myself for so long, but I can't hide it anymore. I love you with all my heart, and I hope you feel the same way.

[text]: You've captured my heart completely. I love you more than I ever thought possible, and I can't wait to see where our love takes us.

[text]: I've tried to deny my feelings, but it's impossible.

[text]: You've touched my soul in ways no one else ever has. I love you with every fiber of my being, and I can't imagine my life without you.

[text]: I've been struggling to find the right time to say this, but I can't wait any longer. I'm in love with you, and I hope you feel the same way about me.

[text]: Every time I'm with you, my heart skips a beat.

[text]: I've tried to fight it, but it's futile

[text]: You've stolen my heart, and I don't want it back. I'm in love with you, and I can't imagine my life without you by my side.

[text]: I've been writing and rewriting this message a hundred times, but the truth is simple: I'm in love with you, and I can't hold it in any longer.

[text]: I've spent countless nights thinking about how to tell you this.

[usertoxicyaoi]

for ages i've always made myself not go too deep into analysing and interpreting this:

just because in uwma, when team said this, we didn't have the full context. in between us, we do.

and i think its now that i can finally put my mind at ease and speak about how much this, for me, is team implying and referring to his mental state. the fact that he knows his ptsd, insomnia and survivor's guilt are things that are never going to go away. they've left their scars all over team for so long now that he can't even imagine his life without them.

and so he's realised here, by this point in the show, that he loves win. and he wants to be someone important to win and wants win's love too. he doesn't want to run away from that. he doesn't want to run away from the only person in the world who he can confide in and talk to about his demons and his past and his trauma. win gives him so much emotional security and fulfillment. he has craved this for so long and he doesnt want to let it go.

but at the same time, team himself knows that his trauma can get the best of him at any time and put his mental health and entire physical and emotional state at a detrimental place, and that includes putting himself in danger sometimes too. this isnt going to go away. ever.

and he's trying to tell win here, just that. that "can you put up with me at my lowest? when things get heavy and my thoughts spiral and i've had barely any sleep and i'm all over the place, will you be able to handle that? when you find out about my past, will you still see me in the same way? when i'm sobbing because of my guilt over how i killed p'ton and i keep saying how i wish i was dead instead of him, will you be afraid and run away from me? can you catch me when i'm spiralling and falling into the abyss?"

and. no. really. i get win's hesitation. things have changed so much and he knows he loves team but he's had this life long ingrained belief that what he loves and holds close, he ends up losing. all his life, win has sacrificed and been so selfless and only given and given and given. and now, with team, for once, he just WANTS. and he wants team to STAY. and that is so hard for him to admit to team because he IS scared of losing team, especially after that last episode. but how does win tell team that without sounding selfish or rude? because win is none of things, but how does win tell team that "if i love you, i am scared of losing you too. and i've seen you drown once and then held you whilst you talked about how you wish you were dead. so yeah, i am petrified of losing you." like. remember the look of horror on his face and the confusion in his eyes, just at the MENTION of team saying how he wishes he was dead:

like. they STILL havent talked about this. so how can they possibly talk about long term or forever when this all ... is still THERE. HAUNTING them.

and i feel like until this isnt cleared up or talked through between them, its just going to linger. and they can't put off talking about this any longer now. team, about his childhood trauma and guilt, and how he needs win because he is his safezone, he depends on him and in that, craves for win to love him despite his issues and his trauma and his past, because he likes how good win's love makes him feel about himself and no one has ever made him feel like that and so, yeah, selfishly so, but team wants that for him and he just hopes win will stay. and win, about his abandonment and attachment issues, and how scared he is of losing team at any given moment, but how he loves team for how wanted and appreciated he makes him feel, which is something he's never felt from anyone, and so, yeah, selfishly so, but win wants that for him and he just hopes that team will stay.

[bezierballad]

"Of course, I've made many contracts and satisfied many mortals' desires and wishes throughout my existence. Even now, the taste of their souls always seem to stick with me."

"If you can pardon my protruding curiosity, what do they usually ask for?"

"A grand majority of them have asked for wealth and power. Limitless amounts, even."

"Well, those things are quite worthless if that person is fated to be dead the next day, right? Humans and their impulsiveness."

"Yes, indeed. Even now it never fails to be amusing."

"…what have you gotten in return?"

"Um... souls."

"…other than that."

"Other than that, nothing."

"…Nothing?"

"Other than souls, nothing at all… I don't see what else I could possibly receive, if anything."

"Well, if you could wish for something and have that be granted, what would it be?"

"…I simply want to fufill my master's wish. If only to finally be able to consume what's been marinating in years of pain and despair… and finally sate myself. I wish to finally be able to take what's been right in front of me and yet so far out of my reach... I wish to finally be able to satisfy my endless craving for the most fine and extravagant course I've ever had... that is all."

"...Well... why wait then?"

"..."

"..."

"...I'm sorry?"

"Three years, you've gone without consuming a single soul, all because you've been hankering for something that suits only your personal high-quality tastes. Three years, Sebastian!"

"And? That's hardly even a fragment of our lifespan."

"Well, if you want it so badly, why not have it now?"

"I can't afford to break my contract with my young master now of all times. I see absolutely no reason to do so."

"..."

"...why would be as wreckless and imbecilic as to break my contract after years of progress?"

"...Allow me to put it this way: imagine you're a donkey who's looking to take its rider somewhere because they have no other source of transportation. They want to go somewhere... far, let's say. You haven't eaten in days, and your only possible food source is a carrot on a stick... and you're not even halfway to your destination."

"...I don't see where you're going with this."

"Is the long, painful journey really worth going through... if by the end of it, the carrot you've been working so hard for has gone all moldy?"

"..."

"...Sebastian?"

"..."

"W-Where are you going?"

"It's been a fine moment of tranquility dining with you, Napoleon, but I'm afraid I can't stay any longer. My master's most likely woken up by now and I must not keep him waiting for his breakfast."

"Sebastian..."

"...you didn't even eat anything."

[miradelletarot]

Okay, US moots...help.

I need to put some feelers out there. I have *GOT* to move out of florida...preferably the end of december after Christmas, or in january. I was hoping to go for Wisconsin, (please, no one mention the weather. I am aware of the abundant cold, and I LIKE cold. I MISS cold...i can't drive in it, but i'll fucking learn okay?) But at this rate, I am willing to go anywhere that's got 4 seasons, jobs and low-income living.

When I say I'm desperate, i'm not kidding. I KNOW I am overstaying my welcome with my friends, and my bestie has been starting to sound a little passive aggressive with certain things, and it's making me feel really guilty for being there as long as I have (even though she was originally talking about me moving with her and her family and stuff...I'm just getting the vibe that things are not as happy as they once were,) and I don't want to inconvenience her any more than I already have.

I do not make enough money to pay her much, if at all. I buy my own food, pay my own bills (cell phone, credit cards, and other personal stuff,) but that's about all i can handle. if i could afford my own place, trust me, I WOULD. I don't want to ruin our friendship, but I'm afraid if I stay there much longer I worry things will start to decline.

I work 2 jobs, 7 days a week, and my ass is still paycheck to paycheck. If i want anything extra i have to really pinch pennies to get it, and that's not a lot to work with tbh. I'm not home much, and i keep to myself as much as possible. It's just me and my dog for now b/c i can't afford to take care of my kids too. They have to stay with dad for now (which is fine, we have an agreement on that so i'm not worried there).

Anyway, I'll take recommendations at this point for locations, available jobs, etc. I can't move until at least the end of December b/c I have an agreement with one of my bosses to pay off a car she bought me, and I need to focus on getting that squared away. After that, I'm looking to get the fuck out of dodge.

Which, ofc, this means I am gonna once again ask for help with funds. If you want a tarot reading, visit my website, www.miradelletarot.com, or DM me if you need assistance. I am also going to try and do my notary stuff locally, and perhaps see if I can officiate a wedding or something here and there. I am even going as far as to reconsider doing F*nsly. I didn't really like it much, and barely used it, but at this rate...money is an issue I can no longer hope will get better. I have to do whatever it takes to get what I need to make this happen. This turned into a rant, trauma dump so sorry about that. I've been really stressed and in my feels a lot these last few days and the reality of my situation isn't helping at all.