#i've been listening to a brand new me a lot lately and it's magic

[with-eyes-closed]

[tommiruewrites]

The Night We Met

summary: Songfic based on "The Night We Met" by Lord Huron! (i'm awful at summaries i'm sorry) pairing: eddie munson x henderson!reader

word count: 6.76k requested: yes | no requests: open | closed request rules here

warnings: Major S4 Vol1 + Vol2 Spoilers!! fluff to heavy angst, cursing, light kissing/making out, major character death, not proofread, no use of y/n, gn reader / no pronouns or gender descriptions for reader except an implication of long hair (if i missed anything please lmk!!) a/n: it's my first time writing anything for stranger things or eddie munson so sorry if it sucks! feel free comment any thoughts or suggestions, they make my day <3

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I am not the only traveler Who has not repaid his debt

"No, Nance, I'm not going with you on a date! I refuse to be the third wheel again-"

The bedroom door burst open, shaking the pictures on your wall as Dustin invited himself inside. You sighed, used to his antics, "Hold on a sec' Nance." You shoved the phone face down into the pillowy fabric of your bed to muffle your talking.

"Christ, Dustin, how many times do I have to tell you to knock on the damn door?" You groaned dramatically at the interruption.

"I need you to pick me up after the hellfire campaign tonight."

"That's nice." You picked up your phone to continue your conversation.

"Oh, come on-"

You slammed the phone back down, "Dustin! I'm in the middle of an important conversation right now. Can't you just bike home like you always do?"

"No! It's gonna be pouring! That would be like five miles in the rain!" His voice cracks as he waves his arms dramatically. "Do you really want me to get soaking wet, and then catch a cold, and then die because you made me bike home all by myself in the-"

"Dustin!"

"I'm just asking!"

You groaned in annoyance once again, knowing that he's already reeled you in. "Say the magic word." You smirk him, tapping your finger against the phone impatiently.

Dustin huffs, crossing his arms childishly, "Fine. Will you please pick me up from Hellfire tonight?"

You pretended to think it over before you finally gave in, "Fine! But I swear if you run so much as ten minutes late, I will leave you there to walk home."

"Thank you, you're the best!" He hollers back at you, racing back down the stairs and leaving your door wide open. "DUSTIN!"

I've been searching for a trail to follow again Take me back to the night we met

You pulled up into the trailer park, feeling the bumpy traction from the gravel underneath you. You parked in front of the trailer Dustin instructed you to, noting the quiet atmosphere of the lot. You probably wouldn't normally find it eerie except for the fact that you were alone and in the dark with no one in sight. To distract yourself while you waited for the campaign to end you decided to play some music. You searched through the heap of cassettes in your glovebox, settling on your brand new and already overused tape of Master of Puppets by Metallica. You popped it in and let yourself get distracted by the music. You began absent-mindedly tapping against your steering wheel, lost in your own little bubble. So lost, in fact, that you didn't notice that the campaign had ended.

The club members filed out of the trailer, saying their farewells and heading off in their respective directions. Dustin, Lucas, and Mike all said their goodbyes before heading towards your car. Eddie watched the kids trail off, opening the doors to hop inside. Suddenly he heard a wave of music flooding from your vehicle. Is that... Metallica?

He peered his head around to look through the windshield. He was just too curious to see who this mystery person was who happened to be listening to one of his favorite bands. As he looked in, he could see a glimpse of your face through the window. You looked like you were talking to the kids in the back seat, peering at them through the rearview mirror. He swore he could feel his stomach swarm with butterflies, something he'd never felt before. Something that made him want to vomit up all the cheesy feelings and stomp them out on the pavement.

Eddie had seen you around in school. You were in his year, but he had always just admired you from afar. The more he admired you, the more he wanted to know about you. He started taking note of all your quirks and habits. He noticed how you would always put a heart next to your name on tests, and sometimes a little smiley face. He noticed how you always tied your hair back at lunch with the hair tie that was permanently engraved in your wrist. He noticed how you would poke little holes into your eraser with your pencil when there was a particularly difficult exam. He would never admit it, but he had been harboring a growing crush on you for a while. Thought you were gorgeous, but definitely way out of his league. You were attractive, smart, kind, and almost always had jocks and cheerleaders fawning all over you... but now that he knew you were into metal? Now he was a goner.

He admired you as you talked, watching how the light from the streetlamps illuminated you face with this perfect, golden glow. It made you look almost angelic. He got so wrapped up in his staring that he almost didn't notice you staring right back at him. When he caught your gaze, he could feel heat rising up to his face.

You noticed his staring, sending a kind smile his way. He smiled back at you as he shifted his weight on his feet awkwardly. Man, did he have a pretty smile. Not just his smile, everything about him was attractive, and you found his awkwardness to be extremely endearing. You offered a small wave before kicking your car in reverse and pulling out of the lot.

"Hey, Dustin, who was that?" You ask, eyes trained on the road ahead. 

"Who?"

"The guy with the long hair."

"Oh him?" Dustin asked curiously, "That's Eddie. Our DM? I figured you'd know of him. I mean, he is in your year."

Oh, you knew of him. The whole town practically knew of him at this point, being one of the few proud metalheads and DnD nerds in Hawkins. Of course, you already knew of him, but you had never really put much thought into it. You always respected him, admiring how he was so unapologetically himself and could always speak his mind. You had just never gotten the chance to speak to him. Well, you actually had many chances considering he was in most of your classes and close with your little brother. You had just never been able to muster up the courage to talk to him before.

Eddie Munson.

Little did you know that Eddie Munson felt the exact same way about you, and it was only a matter of time before your paths would cross.

And then I can tell myself What the hell I'm supposed to do

"Stephen King, huh?"

You practically jumped out of your seat at the sudden interruption. You look up to see the one and only Eddie Munson, a sarcastic smirk on his face. "A little jumpy for someone who's into horror." He teases lightheartedly, noting your lack of response.

"Oh, uh... yeah. Guess I just didn't hear you coming." You reply awkwardly, placing a bookmark between the open pages before setting the book to the side. You slide over on the doorstep, inviting him to sit beside you. You could hear the booming music and loud chatter from inside still bouncing off the walls behind you.

"You have good taste." He smiles at you, this time much less smug. "Not a fan of parties?"

"Not so much. Too many people." You shrug, fiddling with the sleeves of your varsity jacket anxiously. "You don't seem like the party type either, Munson."

He leaned back, palms pushing into the harsh pavement with a dramatic sigh. "Well, when money calls."

Eddie could sense your nervous energy, watching how you could barely sit still. He noticed all your tells: your restless fidgeting, how you chewed your bottom lip raw, the way your leg bounced up and down in a way that made your whole-body shake. He felt a small pang in his chest as he realized how uncomfortable you must be feeling. He had the urge to put his hand on your bouncing knee to calm you down, but he didn't want to make you even more uncomfortable, so he didn't.

"So why did you stay? If you don't like parties, I mean. You here with someone?" He asks nervously, secretly hoping you weren't with anyone.

You looked down at your hands, almost embarrassed to admit it. "I came with some girls from my class that practically dragged me here. They left with some guys a couple of hours ago and now I don't have a ride home." You trailed off, not wanting to seem too pathetic. "I'm waiting for some friends to get off of work and pick me up."

Eddie's face softened, all of a sudden feeling this unexplainable anger towards a group of girls he didn't even know. "When does their shift end?"

You checked the watch on your wrist, "In about an hour or so."

"Honey, it's freezing out here!"

Honey, Honey, Honey. You felt a light blush tint your cheeks at the nickname.

"You can't wait out here for an hour, you freeze to death." He thought for a moment before offering, "I can drive you home if you want? My van's parked just across the street."

He really hoped you didn't think he was some sort of creep.

"Are you sure? I don't want to be any trouble-"

"Nonsense!" He said with his usual dramatics, causing you laugh. God, he loved your laugh. He wanted to be the one to make you do that all the time.

"Well, if you insist." You smiled, taking his hand as he helped you up off the ground. His hand lingered on yours for a moment longer than necessary before dropping it with an awkward shift. You would have been lying if you said you weren't a little bit disappointed.

He walked you over to his van in almost complete silence, both of you too awkward and nervous to come up with anything interesting to say. Once you got into the passenger's seat, he opened up his glove box to reveal a huge selection of cassettes that almost rivaled yours. Almost.

"Pick anything you'd like." He said absent mindedly as he turned on his engine, letting you freely rummage through the pile. You let out an excited gasp, seeing your current favorite song amongst the collection. Master of Puppets. You quickly pull it out, excitedly handing it to him to put in the player.

He took the tape, fingers ever so slightly brushing yours, sending little shocks through you at the contact. He turned it over to look at the title, causing a wolfish grin to spread across his face. "I knew it! You, Henderson, are a cute little metal freak." He exclaimed teasingly, pushing the cassette into the player.

You felt a much heavier blush spread across your face this time, biting your cheek to hold back a giddy smile. He thinks I'm cute?

"Shut up, Munson."

And then I can tell myself Not to ride along with you

You laid against Eddie's chest, his arm wrapped comfortably around your waist as the two of you laid on his couch watching Sleepaway Camp. It had become a weekend tradition to have a movie night at Eddie's, and this week was his turn to pick the movie. You watched as a particularly gory scene came on, hiding your face in his chest and gripping his shirt like a like your life depended on it. He laughed softly, rubbing soothing circles into your hip. He definitely didn't choose a scary movie just so he could have an excuse to hold you.

"Scared?" He leaned down to whisper in your ear, the warmth of his closeness calming you.

You buried your face further into him to hide your embarrassment, "Just shut up and watch the movie Munson."

It had been months since Eddie drove you home from that party, and the two of you had quickly become inseparable. You saw each other practically every day and told each other everything. Well, almost everything. He was your best friend, but you wished so badly that he was more. Besides, Robin and Steve wouldn't hesitate to tease you relentlessly for it and you wanted more than anything to be able to shove it back in their smug faces.

You finally willed yourself to look at the screen again, getting anxious with the suspense.

"Hey, hey-" Eddie tilted your chin up to look at him, gently pulling your lip out from between your teeth where you were gnawing at it nervously. "Don't do that. You'll make yourself bleed."

"Oh..." Was all you could find within yourself to reply. With the close proximity of your faces and his hand under your chin, thumb still lingering on your bottom lip, you were starting to get a little lightheaded. Your eyes flickered down to his lips before you could catch yourself. You quickly averted your gaze to his neck, hoping he hadn't noticed. He noticed.

He let his eyes wander back down to your lips, slowly leaning in towards you. You felt his lips barely brush against yours, his warm breath fanning your face as he waited for confirmation that you wanted this too. He looked at you with the softest look you'd ever seen, silently asking for permission. You finally leaned forward to close the gap, feeling yourself melt into him. Both of you smiled into the kiss as you felt the cliche fireworks go off in your heads. You moved your hands around his neck, entangling your fingers to lightly tug at the hair near the nape of his neck. He let out a soft moan, so soft you almost missed it, muffled by your lips on his. The response sent a swarm of butterflies to your stomach. He placed his hands on your hips, shifting you to straddle his waist so you were in a more comfortable position. You noticed how his lips were surprisingly soft despite refusing to use chapstick, and you could taste cigarettes, the slightest hint of weed, and something sugary you couldn't quite place. His hands gripped tighter at your hips, slowly moving under your (his) t-shirt to rest on your waist. His cold rings made contact with your skin, causing goosebumps to rise in their wake. You softly giggled into the kiss, slightly ticklish.

You eventually let your hands fall to his chest as the two of you reluctantly pulled apart for some much-needed air. The two of you just sat there staring lovingly at each other, panting as you tried to catch your breath.

"One hell of a first kiss." He teased, a dorky smile on his lips.

"Go big or go home." You smiled down at him, absolutely giddy with adoration. "I like you, like, a lot... If that wasn't clear."

"I Like you" was an understatement.

Eddie's heart swelled, "I like you a lot too."

That was an understatement too.

He leaned up to press another peck to your pretty lips, neither of you able to wipe the smiles off your faces. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to tell you that. To do that."

You leaned down to press excited, loving kisses across his cheek and down his neck, nuzzling your head into his shoulder. "Me too, Eds."

The grip you had on his shirt was loosening as the day finally caught up to you. Eddie rubbed your back soothingly as you started you started to fall asleep in his hold. "It's okay. I'm right here, sweetheart." He whispered quietly into your hair, "You can rest now."

He held you close to his chest as you finally let your eyes flutter shut, the film playing in the background long forgotten as he carried you off to his room to let you sleep.

Yeah, Eddie thought as he admired you, This is the one I'm going to marry someday.

I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met

"Eddie? Eddie!" You whisper shouted uselessly, shining a flashlight into a dusty window.

"Yeah, that'll find him." Dustin snarked, shaking his head in disappointment as he walked towards Steve.

You and your brother were with Steve, Robin, and Max, searching around a seemingly abandoned house in search of Eddie. You banged the flashlight against the window, coughing as dust fell into your face.

Robin started hollering out for Reefer Rick while Dustin and Steve argued pointlessly over whether or not Steve could take a squirrel in a fight.

"Hey guys..." Max caught our group's attention, her gaze fixed to a shack behind the house, "Has anyone checked back there yet?"

The lot of you ran through the grass and into the broken-down boathouse. You carefully surveyed the area, making sure not to step on any loose floorboards. The rest of the group looked around, Robin occasionally sneezing due to the amount of dust.

You and Dustin looked around, searching for easy hiding places. "It looks pretty empty."

"Yeah, I'm missing collar bones, not eye's."

"Stop talking."

Steve studied a window covered in cobwebs, "What a dump." He grabbed an oar off the wall, making his way back over towards a tarp covered boat, poking and stabbing it. You watched him for a moment before losing your patience, "What are you doing?"

He shrugged at you like it was obvious, continuing to poke at it, "He might be in there."

Your little brother piped up, also losing his patience, "So take the tarp off."

"If you're so brave, you take the tarp off!" Steve and Dustin continued their usual bickering. You quickly lost interest, growing increasingly more worried about your missing boyfriend. Especially considering all the accusations against him. Not that you believed any of them, of course. Eddie could barely kill a bug without crying, there was no way in hell he was a murderer. You were just worried that he would be put in danger, and you would do most anything to try to avoid that. You honestly didn't know what you'd do if something happened to him.

"Hey, look over here!" Robin and Max displayed a clutter of snacks, food wrappers, and empty cans. "Someone was here."

"Maybe he heard us?" Steve added, "Got spooked and ran?"

Dustin chimed in again, "Don't worry, Steve will get him with his oar!"

Steve deadpanned to Dustin as you held back a laugh, "I know you think you're being funny, but considering everyone in this room has nearly died a hundred times, personally, I don't find it funny in the slightest-" Suddenly Steve was being pushed up against the wall with a shard of broken glass pressed to his throat. Everyone jumped back in terror, before noticing exactly who was on the other side of the glass.

"Eddie?" Eddie's face softened as soon as he heard your voice, turning to face you and immediately dropping the glass to the floor. He looked at you with a fear in his eyes that you had never seen before. He looked confused and scared out of his mind. It made your heart squeeze as you looked at his trembling hands. You immediately walked over and pulled him into a bone crushing hug, shoving your face into the crook of his neck. "I was so worried about you." Your words came out muffled, cheek squished into his shoulder.

His shaky hands came up to pull you impossibly closer, "I didn't do it. I- I tried to save her, but she wouldn't wake up. I didn't know what to do, and I ran-"

"Shh, It's okay. I know." You whispered soothingly, "I know. You don't have to convince me, Eds. I believe you."

I don't know what I'm supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met

"There's no way it's been busy for three days. That's not Joyce." Max argued, slamming the phone back into place on the wall.

"She's right," Nancy agreed, pacing back and forth across the room, "it can't be a coincidence."

You tense up in your seat, "But Vecna can't hurt them there, right? I mean, not outside of Hawkins."

"Not if he's dead." Nancy said firmly, giving you a determined look that made your stomach twist with stress. Eddie must have noticed your leg start to bounce anxiously because he rested his hand on your knee, rubbing your leg to try to calm your nerves.

"We have to go back into the Upside Down."

"What?!" You, Eddie, Erica, and Dustin all gasped simultaneously. Eddie started violently shaking his head, "Nope, absolutely not."

"Nance, you know I love you." You started, hands fidgeting with Eddie's rings as your anxiety kicked up to 100%, "but are you out of your mind?!"

Steve started towards Nancy, hands raised in surrender as if he was afraid to set her off, "Let's think this through-"

"What is there to think through!" she snapped.

Steve piped up again, "Max almost died, Nance."

"That's because we weren't prepared." Nancy countered, "This time, we will be."

"He's not afraid of us."

"Yeah, and for good reason!" It was now Robin's turn to speak up, "We were wrong about Vecna/Peter/Henry/001. He's a number like Eleven only a sick, evil, male, child murdering version of her."

Nancy sighed, unable to understand Robin's fast paced nature, "What's your point?"

"My point is he's super powerful. It's not fair, right?"

"Then why fight fair?" Dustin started, "You're right, he's like Eleven which means-"

"Which means we have the upper hand. We know all her strengths and weaknesses." You finished, jumping up from your place on the couch and towards your brother.

Erica raised her brow, sceptical, "Weaknesses?"

"Yeah, when El remote-travels she goes into this trance like state." Dustin clarified, "I'm willing to bet the same is true for Vecna."

Lucas jumped to his feet, snapping his fingers at his revelation, "Which explains what he was doing in the attic!"

"Exactly." You add, "So that would mean that when he attacks his next victim, he'll be back in that attic. Physical body defenseless."

"Defenseless?" Eddie scoffed, "What about the giant army of angry bats?"

Dustin started pacing, trying to think of something "We'll have to find a way past them. Distract them somehow."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." You snapped, letting your nerves get the best of you as you begin to dig your nails into the palms of your hands, also pacing the room.

"Yeah, distract them." Eddie asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice as he walked over to you, grabbing your hands in his, "And how are we supposed to do that exactly?"

"No idea..."

Eddie dropped his head onto your shoulder laughing nervously like a mad man, "We're dead. We are absolutely dead."

"But-" Dustin continued, trying to be optimistic, "Once their gone, Vecna doesn't stand a chance. It'll be like slaying Dracula in his sleeping coffin."

Eddie wrapped his arms around you, letting his head rest on the back of your shoulder to stop you from pacing as well as calm his own worries, "Yeah okay, that's great in theory, but we still don't know what the bats are capable of." You grumble out, wanting nothing more than for all of this to be over.

"Yeah, and there's no pattern to Vecna's killings either. We don't know when, or who he's going to get next."

"Yes, we do." Max stepped forward and into the conversation. "I can still feel him."

Everyone turned their attention towards the younger teen, plotting and debating our next move. You tried to pay attention but you just couldn't focus on the words anymore. You zoned out as your whole body went rigid with dread. It's not like you haven't fought the supernatural before. You've been fighting it since your freshman year when Will first went missing... but this was different. Something was off and you couldn't shake that uneasy feeling in your stomach. You couldn't get rid of the swirling thoughts in your head telling you something you didn't want to hear. Not everyone was going to make it this time.

When the night was full of terrors

"Five!" Dustin shouted over the earth-shattering music; eye's locked onto the swarm of bats heading directly for you. You watched Eddie as he continued playing his precious guitar; playing the song he learned for you. The iconic, Master of Puppets. Maybe you were crazy, but you wished desperately that you weren't in imminent danger right now because my god did he look good doing it.

"Four!" The bats screech and scratch as they get closer, making goosebumps raise on the back of your neck. You watch Eddie intensely, both of you waiting for the cue to run like your life depended on it, because it did.

"Three!"

They were almost here.

"Two!"

You could hear your heart pounding in your ears.

"One! Run!" The three of you ran as fast as your feet could carry you, almost tripping over the slimy vines covering the area. Eddie helped you and Dustin off the roof, pushing you up the steps. You all shoved your way inside the trailer, shutting the door tight behind you. You panted and stared up at Eddie wide eyed, Dustin having a similar expression written on his face.

"Most. Metal. EVER!" You shouted, jumping into your boyfriend's arms as adrenaline took over. The three of you squealed and jumped around in achievement like excited children.

And your eyes were filled with tears

Your little celebration was cut short by the sound of sharp, scraping footsteps above you. You all snap back to reality, refocusing your attention on the situation at hand. You still didn't fully know the abilities these bats actually possessed. You pulled yourself out of Eddie's protective hold, turning to grab your weapons off the floor. "I don't like the sound of that." Your voice lowered down to an almost-whisper, trying to listen to the thuds through the thin metal. The boys hadn't yet mastered the skill of volume control.

"They're on the roof!" Dustin squeaked, holding up his hand-made weapon.

"Yeah, no shit." You moved slowly to follow the sound. The boys timidly trail behind you, looking every which way just in case they were in for a surprise. Eddie picked up a weapon with a string of curses, adjusting spear in his hand nervously.

As the noise stopped, you all stared up at the roof with bated breath, waiting for something, anything, to happen.

Suddenly the vent burst open, a giant, ugly, demobat trying to force its way through the small space.

"Jesus H. Christ!" Eddie yelled over you and Dustin's screams as the three of you rapidly poked and stabbed at the bat, trying to either kill it or make it so sick of your assault that it leaves you alone. You watched out of the corner of your eye as Eddie dropped his weapon, grabbing a spare shield off of the floor. "Move!" Eddie shouted, practically shoving you and Dustin out of the way. He then pushed the nail covered shield up into the ceiling, effectively blocking the vent. The three of you heaved a breath of relief before Dustin's eye's go wide, face paling.

"Eddie... you don't have any other vents in here, right?"

"Shit!"

When you had not touched me yet

Eddie raced over towards the back of his trailer, you and Dustin hot on his trail. As soon as he's turning the handle to open the door, he's slamming it back shut just as an ambush of demobats swarmed in through the other vent. "Fuck fucking shit!" Eddie screeches against the door just as a bat pounds against it. "Go go go GO!"

The three of you stumbled over each other, rushing over to the open gate as fast as you could. "Up, Dustin!" You demanded as you and Eddie helped him up the rope and safely down onto the other side. Eddie ushered you to the rope, "Go! Come on!" Eddie practically begged as you hesitated, looking back to the door.

The demobats were making progress, dents and cracks in the wood only getting larger. You looked back at Eddie, looking into his eyes and seeing them almost glossed over with a look you didn't recognize. "We're running out of time!" You felt your stomach twist with anxiety, feeling the words stab right through your chest. He was right, you just didn't know then exactly what that meant.

You snapped out of your trance, hearing Dusting screaming for you to hurry up. You let Eddie help you back through the gate.

Oh, take me back to the night we met

You and Dustin stared through the gate as Eddie grabs the rope, shouting for him to hurry up and climb. You watch as he freezes, turning towards the door to see that the bats have almost broken it in completely. It's only a matter of time. You feel a lump start to form in your throat.

"Eddie come on! Hurry up!" Dustin shouts, "Christ, just climb!" You can hear the anxiety evident in his voice, making your heartbeat impossibly faster in your chest.

"Eddie!" You scream down, begging for him to hear you. "Eddie what are you doing!? Climb the rope! Climb the damn rope, Eddie!"

Eddie looks back up at Dustin for a moment before turning to you. You feel tears begin to prick your eyes as you whisper a choked "Please."

You see Eddie's eyes water with a shaky breath as he mouths out an "I'm sorry." with one last smile. You feel your entire body go static like a live wire as you watch him cut the rope connecting the worlds, leaving you with no way to him as he races out of the trailer, taunting the bats to follow him.

Your ears start to ring, drowning out the sound of Dustin's and your own screams, drowning out the screeching of the bats as they chase Eddie out of the trailer. You don't even have time to process your own movements as you pull a chair under the gate, standing on it to jump up through the portal. You land on the other side with a thud, letting out a pained sob as you hear your arm crack underneath you. A sharp pain shoots through you before turning into a dull throb, but you can't think about it right now. All you can think about is Eddie. Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. You use your good arm to push yourself to your feet, breaking out into a run as your legs move faster than your mind, pulling you out into the darkness.

"Eddie?!" You picked up your pace, clutching your arm to your chest and ignoring the hot tears rolling down your cheeks as you frantically searched the red storm around you, "Eddie!" Your heart plummeted to your feet as you turned a corner to see the swarm of bats starting to fly off into the distance. You see something lying on the floor and your head starts to go fuzzy. "Oh my god-"

I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met

"Oh god-" You fall to your knees next to the love of your life, blinking away the tears to see blood pooling around you. "Oh god, what did they do to you?" You frantically take off the flannel you had wrapped around your waist, lifting him with a groan of pain to tie it tightly around his wounds in an attempt to slow the bleeding. You do the best you can with one arm, sobbing out frustratedly as you use all your strength to try to tie it tighter. You hear Dustin screaming in distress as he falls to the ground next to you.

"Sweetheart-"

"Don't worry, everything is going to be fine." You state firmly, voice wavering as you and Dustin begin to lift him up. "We're going to get you to a hospital, and everything is going to be okay.

"Don't-"

"Just hold on for me, okay? I'll fix this, I have to fix this" You sobbed frantically, "You just need-"

"Just-" you hear Eddie groan in pain as he softly squeezes your arm, "Just... give me a minute." You freeze, time slowing around you. You hesitantly put him down, not willing to accept where this was going. You move your hand to put pressure on his wounds, staring at the blood seeping onto your trembling hands through your teary vision.

You feel as though your head is under water, hearing a muffled conversation between Eddie and Dustin. You can hear your brother crying and panicking but the pounding in your head drowns it out. You refuse to let it end this way. It's not fair. It's not his time yet, it can't be. You haven't had enough time yet.

"Hey, hey-" You hear Eddie's weak voice and his cold hand softly brush a hair off of your cheek. "Please don't cry."

You feel your lip tremble as you finally look at his face, seeing him all beat up and bloody you let out a choked sob. You try to hold yourself together, wanting to stay strong for Dustin. Needing to stay strong for Eddie. "I didn't run this time, right?" He asks, smiling at you.

"No, no. You didn't run." You use your remaining strength to give him a weak smile back, "But god, do I wish you did."

You grab weakly at Eddie's wrist, pulling his hand gently off of your cheek and up to your chest. You hold his hand against your rapid heart, hoping that maybe you can transfer your life supply through to him. "Next time you do something stupid like that I'm gonna have to kick your ass." You say with a watery smile, trying to pretend that everything is fine for just a little bit longer.

He lets out a small, pained laugh, squeezing your hand just a little bit tighter. "Still got that date next weekend." Eddie says with a wobbly voice, and you can tell he's using all his strength just to stay conscious. You can see the tears pooling in his eyes, spilling slowly down his face, and it makes your throat feel like it's closing in. "Don't forget to pick out a movie, okay?"

You can only give a feeble nod and an "Okay." Unable to breathe properly anymore as your lungs feel like their frozen and on fire at the same time. His arm weakens and tenses in your hold. You can feel him trying to fight just a little bit longer for you, and you can hear his pain. You finally let out quiet tears as you realize that there's no getting out of this one. You can't run away from it forever.

You lean forward to press a soft kiss to his lips, tasting the bitter tang of his blood on your tongue, reminding you that this would be the last time you would feel his lips on yours. The last time you would touch him, laugh with him, hold his hand... everything. You didn't want to let go. You weren't ready. You finally make yourself pull away, resting your forehead against his to keep him close.

"I love you so, so much Eds." His eyes flutter, trying to stay open. He squeezes your hand, staring back into your eyes with all his energy. He tries to speak, and you know you'll break down if he does. "Shh, It's okay. I know," You whisper reassuringly, "I know." You can still hear Dustin's sobs and pleas from beside you.

"Don't worry about me, okay? Dustin and I'll take care of the kids while you're gone. We'll be okay." You prayed and wished for that to be true, but you knew it wasn't. How were you supposed to keep going if he was gone.

He looked so tired, and you knew you couldn't make him be in pain any longer. You can hear his staggered breathing begin to slow and you feel your silent tears falling onto his face as you will yourself to let him go. You have to let him go. "It's okay, I'm right here. You can rest now, Eds." You swallow the knife in your throat as you squeeze his hand three times, "I love you."

He finally allows his eyes to flutter shut with a weak smile, and his cold body goes limp beneath you. The dam finally breaks as you scream and sob for him to come back to you, body going numb as you cling to him. Dustin cries out behind you as he pulls you away from Eddie's lifeless body and towards the gate, away from the bats screeching in the distance.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Take me back to the night we met

You sit silently in the filled school gym as you watch everyone around you busy themselves. You offered to help Steve with the clothes, but he told you just to rest. You didn't put up a fight, knowing you couldn't do much with your arm in a full cast anyway.

As you sat there, your brain ran blank. Like the channel was switched, buzzing around with white noise. You haven't been able to speak in days. You've barely eaten, slept, showered. You just can't bring yourself to do anything anymore. You can't get the image of him bloody and afraid out of your head. Your hands haven't stopped trembling and it takes all your energy to stop yourself from sobbing. The only thing keeping you going at this point is Dustin, knowing he's struggling just as much and needs you with him.

Your eyes lift as you see Eddie's Uncle, Wayne Munson, trudging into the gym to put up a new missing poster for Eddie. You feel your chest tighten as you watch him do it, not even able to bring yourself to look at Eddie's picture. You reach into your pocket to feel the cold chain of the pick necklace you've been carrying around with you. You couldn't bring yourself to put it on. It felt wrong. So, you carried it in your pocket, wanting to have a piece of him with you. Looking at his uncle now, you know that he needs it more.

It's what Eddie would have wanted.

"Excuse me, Mr. Munson?" Even saying his last name hurt like barbed wire on your tongue. Mr. Munson whipped his head to glare at you, his gaze softening when he realized who you were.

You were over at the trailer with Eddie most nights, so you knew Wayne well. He leaned in to wrap you in a big bear hug, careful of your injured arm. You could feel his worry and you envied the hope he still had. The hope that you were about to strip away.

"Mr. Munson-"

"Please, darling, call me Wayne."

"Mr. Wayne. I, uh- Eddie wanted me to give you this." you croaked out, your throat feeling like sandpaper as you spoke. You pulled the chain from your pocket and placed it carefully into his hand. He stared at it for a moment, his face holding a blank expression you couldn't read.

"Where- How did you get this?"

You had to mentally restrain yourself, not wanting to break down in front of everyone. Especially not someone who loved Eddie as much as you knew his uncle did.

"I was with him when- the uh... the earthquake happened." It made your stomach curl with nausea to lie about what really happened, but you knew there wasn't another option.

He moved his gaze from the necklace up to your face, "And where is Eddie now?"

Your face paled, lip quivering as you swallowed back the dry lump in your throat. Your silence was all the answer he needed. "I'm so sorry."

He sat down on a nearby table to steady himself, clutching the necklace tight enough that his knuckles turned white. You could see his eyes fill with tears and you sat down beside him, leg bouncing with anxiety. "I wish everyone had gotten to know him." You started, holding back fresh tears, "Really know him." You looked down at your hands, fiddling with the ring Eddie gave you all those months ago. "Because they would have loved him, Mr. Munson."

"They would have loved him."

The two of you sat in quiet sorrow, neither one of you strong enough anymore to speak another word.

[belladoesmakeup]

Hey guys,

We all know I love to try out new products and honestly I am embarrassingly late to the Kiehl's party. I have been recommended this brand from friends and family for such a long time, honestly my mum even swears by their facial cream. I decided it was time to try out some bits. I recently discovered that John Lewis in oxford Street now have a counter so I could go and talk to the consultant about what products would suit me the best.

I went to the counter after having done some research about products that might suit my skin and they were literally all the products I was recommended (I must be doing something right!). After talking about my skin time I was even given a little sample of a intense face toner to dry out blemishes (mini blue bottle) and a little body wash (little white bottle) which was so sweet of the consultant, he was so sweet and passionate about the products. So let's chat about the 3 products I did pick up.

Starting with the Kiehl's Ultra Facial Oil-Free Cleanser, 150ml , £17.00 . I need to have a facial cleanser in skincare routine I do whether its day or night I'm convinced products like these have saved my skin and improved it from what it was. This oil free cleanser is a lightweight formula to remove excess oil and impurities leaving your skin looking more balanced. What I personally love about this product is that it does not dry my skin out every time I use it. With some cleansers this can be a issue but this product leaves my skin feeling so soft and it gives my skin a real deep cleanse. Using oil free products really compliments my skin type because I have oily combo skin and using this as my face wash before makeup I always find it sits better on my skin.

Next up we have the product I actually went looking to buy, meet the Kiehl's Ultra Facial Cream, 125ml , £47.50 . Now the reason I wanted to buy this cream is because the product value for price, compared to a 30ml Magic Cream from Charlotte Tilbury for £49.50, I can get the Kiehl's 125ml cream for £2.00 cheaper. Isn't that insane? So many reviews said that they got this cream as a slightly more affordable option compared to other high end brands( it wasn't hard to work out what they were talking about). Luckily this cream lives up to the hype. This lightweight moisturiser helps your skin keep moisture throughout the day while keeping your skin really soft and hydrated. I love how great it makes my skin before makeup and at night before bed. It's such a lightweight formula that it quickly sets into your skin which is a big win for me.

Lastly we have a product I didn't plan on buying but honestly the sales guy was good I had to get it. Let's chat about the Kiehl's Ultra Facial Oil-Free Toner, 250ml , £18.00 .Now Toners are something that is quiet new to my skin care routine because in all honesty I didn't get the hype ( I know I'm a bad person) but now I'm obsessed and use one every evening and morning. The oil-free toner is formulated to visibly reduce excess oil on skin's surface, while leaving it instantly fresh and healthy looking. This toner is alcohol free so it does not dry out your skin and gently removes makeup without stripping the skin. What I love most about this product is being oil-free means it doesn't leave my face all shiney and you can really see a difference with your skin if you have oily skin like me.

I love these products and I've been using them for over a month so I can say in my personal experience these products work really well for me. If you live near Oxford Street why not pop by and talk to the consultants. They are great at recommending products and really listen when you talk about areas of your skin you want to fix. Click the links above to find out more about each product.

Lots of love

Bella x x

[shiro-0197]

Oh bae grrr don't apologize!! I'm just glad your day was alright, and I hope you get some rest tonight!! My day was okay. I was just in front of my laptop since I had classes, and then I finally finished my slides, and had another leo meeting. My brother was a royal pain in the ass the whole day istg, but I'm fine now :) thanks for asking btw!!

Aww but that's so admirable! Gotta love teachers like that, haha. And I totally get that! That one uni I researched is probably the one I've set my eyes on. I've done EXTENSIVE research on it, so I don't want to set my sights on other places. What about you? Do you have any specifics for your future uni?

ikr?? He's just grandpa Kuroo to me istg. He's also an ENTP, and I vibe really well with ENTP's, so haha I think that'll also be cool.

I AGREE SOMUCH. Shōyō is just such a cute smol bean. He'd be the best little spoon, honestly. i agree thoo, they're all amazing characters, and probably would be so fun to hang out with 😭

that's actually pretty great!! I hope the cases come down to double or single digits soon!

oh nice!! And aaah I've heard A LOT about Russian food, it honestly sounds delicious. (I just love hearing people talk about food and culture. I could read/listen to them for hours istg). And aw that's such a cute story. I'm sure they were all really glad you introduced it to them. Confuzzled tho... Y-you don't like cottage cheese? :O

Yes you should be proud!! Today I was ready to kill my brother, then I saw your message(‼️) and I decided I could let him live a little longer, because I was busy reading it.

Ah yes!! Your country's flag colour too!! Tho the blue is such a pretty shade, it's like a teal? So pretty‼️💖💖💖. The Malaysian flag is just like an off-brand US one 😭🤚

and aw I'm glad I'm right! I only know one other person who has white as their favourite colour, and she's the best (Angel). So maybe both the cool people in my life like white xD my favourite colours are pink and yellow :>

Yes, why wouldn't they be? I cherish anything anyone makes for me, and especially you, because you're truly that special. Love you!! Sleep well, sweet dreams :))

—ari (gone back to signing my name with lame ol' Ari because I'm out of ideas. Also. I'm getting territorial over my nickname because at today's leo meeting there was this other guy also named Ari and we DID NOT vibe well grrr)

Hey hey!!! I know I answered like ... 24 hours late which sucks a lot, very sorry :(( I'm hoping your day went good today too!! Tell me about it?

Oh I'm glad you got the work done! Mind showing me a few slides? I'm curious hehe~ Also I'm going to have to detach your brother's ribs for bothering you, my apologies😁

Yeah!! They really make me feel like there is a reason to keep going. Like, at least to make them go "that's my student!!"😭

Well, since I got all the research done for me, I just mostly did research on what its actually like to be a translator, you know? I read through like 24 articles on both languages I know and I think I'm prepared xD I'm gonna look up the unis my teacher suggested soon though, and probably question some of the students because I'm desperate like that😝 Hopefully that'll pay off

Hehe, yea, the way he acts like he has seen life is adorable in a way. That's so cool though, imagine having the luck to have your personality match your favorite character's😭 I really wish I had an extroversion trait in my mbti xD I'd really need that ..

YES also you saying he'd be a little spoon made me want to cuddle him SO BAD I'm JSJDJWJDJ I want to give him a headpat and squish his little cheeks .....

Not gonna lie, I wish I could spend a year with one character each day. How cool would that be? You get a hang out and maybe learn something new. Then live in pain for the rest of your life because they wont be here anymore but that's nothing to worry about

I really hope so too!! Honestly this has been crazy. And the way everyone still refuses to cover up their nose... sometimes I wonder if it's ok to mock people who got COVID, cuz like, it's not always their fault, but when you saw that person without a mask before and now they're in the hospital, it's kinda funny, in a rude way. I'm an asshole, I know, I'm sorry😔

Yes yes, if you ever get the chance to try it, you should!!! I'm really sure you'll love it. You should try adding ketchup and mayo mix as well! It'll do magic

Oh no, I LOVE cottage cheese (mixed with sour cream and sugar..🥰🤤🤤), I just really hate it when its cooked or baked. Like ... that's it, its warm and so much soggier now. What have you done? You ruined it. Congratulations! You've lost my respect. Well, not you of course, anyone who cooks cottage cheese xD it's like water, it sucks when warm.

Awh what !!!!! That makes me so happy??!?!? I bring you that much joy you pass up on murder ?!?? That's a lethal strike ma'am were getting married again

Yeah!!! I also kinda like the symbolism. And the story. Which is an honor for this whole place because I really dont like this country xD dont ask why~ personal reasons. Though it's so much more peaceful than others, so that's also great hehe. The Malaysian flag is kinda funny now that you call it like that😭😭😭 I still think it looks cool though!! I'd call it "Asia's USA" but that would, uh, be more of an insult, considering the state (see what I did there? Haha states... haha) of the country right now😓

Welp, the purest people like the purest colors xD just kidding, we're all probably chaotic~ at least out of everyone I know, everyone with white as their favorite has done something no normal person would do (ex. One of the color-white-lovers I knew tried stealing 7 shopping carts😐 I really didnt believe him until he showed me the photo of the fine he got.) Pink and yellow are such a good combination🥺🥺 they're like peach and sunset and uhh... PB&J, if that counts? Peanut butter is now yellow, deal with it😔 Anyway they're really pretty, together or not !!! what's your favorite hue?

Daww... you're so sweet... I'm melting🥺🥺😭💕💕 just so you know I also created a separate album for the stuff you drew me <3

I hope you sleep well tonight!!! You deserve it after all♡♡♡

Dawwh😭😭 I know what it feels like. Sometimes people with your name embarrass themselves so much, it makes you embarrassing because you have the same name. It's not the situation you're in, but uh ... another example? xD I could change your tag to "Shortcake🍰💕" if you'd like😝

[mikemightwritesometimes]

DAUGHTERS - HELL SONGS

"Love is a disgusting thing."

As of more recently, I've been re-connecting with the side of me that once was heavily enamored with thrashing and pulverising - at least in musical form. Last year I re-discovered and realized my absolute infatuation with The Blood Brothers, and I'm sure I'll end up writing about them at some point. The Blood Brothers opened my eyes to a forgotten pre-conceived notion that I once shed, gained back, and shed again - not everything labeled "screamo" or with a "-core" at the end of the genre descriptor is inherently inferior to other forms of heavy music. Quite the contrary, actually. Digging deeper into similar bands since then, I fell in love with everything Orchid has ever done and more recently came around to having some real pleasant body spasms while listening to Jeromes Dream. These three bands made me identify what I love so much about this early brand of """"screamo,"""" namely the menacingly gruesome demeanor and the visceral speed bands can take the style - leading to absolutely euphoric highs.

Bands such as Orchid, Jeromes Dream, and Swing Kids planted the seed for future bands to further twist and mangle the way hyper-speed, ear-shredding goodness is made - and bands like The Blood Brothers, The Locust, (and unknowingly to me for a while) Daughters, carried that torch into the new millennium. All three of the progenitors listed focused on raw power but with an easily perceivable subtext of wit, humor, and unique musical ideas. The successors took that pass from the top of the key and fucking slammed it NBA Jam-style into the future. An alley-oop of strange musical wonders.

When it comes to Daughters, I had never really heard anything by them outside of their incredibly acclaimed 2018 comeback "You Won't Get What You Want," a sublime record - albeit one that I've never really sat down and experienced as a whole. The single "Satan in the Wait" piqued my interest while the closer "Guest House" is really what widened my eyes to the band's sound. It's a fantastic track which beats the shit out of you from the starting gun only to slowly morph into a heart-wrenching (or maybe organ-removing) picture of madness. I bring this track up in particular not only because I love the song (seriously, that melodic, synth brass-sounding addition at the middle of the track is simply awesome and warranted many a replay from me), but because I think out of all the songs I've heard from "YWGWYW," it's the one that closest resembles the ecstasy I feel when listening to their second record, "Hell Songs."

Immediately after digging their comeback record, I did what I usually do - jump back to the debut. Their debut, "Canada Songs," is some pretty good stuff. Not my favorite mathcore (or even grindcore) project I've ever heard (thanks, Locust), but it shows the starting point for the logical progression to their current dense, yet hard-hitting sound. It sounds like shredding your ear with a cheese grater (in a good way, mind you) but even at ~12 minutes for the whole project it's not one I've been inclined to come back and listen to a lot. Where the magic for me truly has lied is listening to them develop into their current form on "Hell Songs," an album that brilliantly blends the incredibly unique character of their recent work with the aggression of their debut.

Right off the bat, "Hell" is a completely different animal than their debut. If "Canada" is a ravenous, rabid dog, than "Hell" is a grizzled, experienced fighting dog who only won't kill you if it feels like you deserve mercy. Immediately noticable in the opener, "Daughters Spelled Wrong," is the shift in the vocal stylings of Alexis Marshall. He's traded in the shrieking grindcore growl of the debut for this bafflingly unique and immediately impressionable southern drawl. One thing I love about bands like The Blood Brothers and The Locust are the flat rejection of traditional hardcore vocal stylings in favor of weirdness - which ends up not only resulting in catchier, more memorable music, but also emphasizes and helps to accentuate the technical virtuosity going on underneath it instead of just drowning it out. "Daughters Spelled Wrong" is a sludgey, slow behemoth that less threatens you at knifepoint than it stares at you with crazy fucking eyes from across the street. Marshall lists off every single negative thing he's ever been called, from a sinner, to a fallen angel, thief, black sheep, and finally: a good-for-nothing, ass fuckin' son of a bitch. If that doesn't hook you in, (especially with the thunderous low end backing him up the length of the track), I don't know what will. It certainly hooked me in.

Throughout the record's ~25 minutes or so, there are a few tracks that instrumentally harken back to the grindcore sounds of their debut - namely "Fiery", "Crotch Buffet", and the fantastic "X-Ray" (I CALL AT FUCKIN ONEEEE, I CALL AT FUCKIN TWOOOOO). The difference here is both the aforementioned shift in vocal style - which lends the songs far more staying power - and the band's ability to elevate their game when it comes to breaking up the madness for a good slice of weirdness. Not only are Daughters a more technical, clean, and more evil beast on this record - they're a stranger one.

However, the crown jewels here are the "longer" tracks. "Feisty Snakewoman" has an opening death wail on guitar that persists throughout the track, winding up to be perfectly symmetrical with the half-time stomps of the drummer - just further proof that the craziest, nastiest music doesn't have to rely on the tired tropes of the genre. "Hyperventilationsystem" is another personal favorite - opening with some mind-melting double bass and high-pitched grinding guitars before suddenly throwing the steering wheel as far as it can go. Punctuated by a spy-thriller bassline and two guitar tracks - one punching, one gushing - Marshall echoes one phrase to himself over and over again, expressing his absolute disgust with love with the phrase, uh, well, "Love is a disgusting thing." As the song builds steam, the southern drawl of the vocal inflection burrows itself into your mind in perfect step with the bass drum - and have fun not singing it to yourself for a week. At the climax of the track, the band sets the car on fire while Marshall yelps, only for the band to drop out behind him for just long enough that your brain gets tenderized as soon as they pick up again.

That's a good time to talk about the lyrics, as well. "Hell Songs" beautifully blurs the line between the wordily poetic and outright debauchery. Within the same record, Marshall paints hauntingly dark imagery such as "When I awoke, a vicious dark hung in the sky / My surroundings foreign and discomforting", and lacerating himself and the listener with his tongue via lines like "I wear my sickness like a wedding band / I've been touching myself all day with a hammer and nail / I'm the flat-footed-mule-faced-fucker, the shit-bird-derelict-king."

Those last lines come from what I feel is the shining achievement of the record - and the song that quickly became one of my favorite extreme music-related songs of all time: "Recorded in a Pyramid." It's almost off-putting how traditional the main rift lining the song is, however as the song takes shape - what with its spastic snare drum fills and such - the underlying strangeness blends with the catchiness to become completely homogenous. By the time the chorus hits, the riff has suddenly jolted into an immediately wonderous major-key riff with a slab of heavy double bass underneath. This is all beautifully topped off with two of my favorite vocal lines I have ever heard in any genre relating to this one, with Marshall expelling all the breath from his lungs on top of this impeccably weird, pretty, and boisterous group of instruments until he sounds physically unable to do so anymore. The band, of course, catches him right at that picture-perfect final word both times to create one of the most memorable moments in hardcore I've ever heard. Again, never does the vocalist achieve this amazing tenacity by outright growling or shrieking - not that growling doesn't have its place - but somehow I picture grindcore grit not coming out anywhere nearly as magical as it does on this track.

The record ties itself up with two similarly great tracks - the much-acclaimed "Cheers, Pricks" which is a six minute (!) excursion into multi-part songwriting, mathcore brutality, Mach 10 funky strumming, and guitar ambience alike. The closer, "The Fuck Whisperer," is a short yet ungodly vast summary of just how much the band has shown on the record. Opening with stop-start fireworks, Marshall drops one line near the beginning of the track and the band follows suit mid-line. Suddenly, all there is is band members in the back murmuring to themselves as if they've just seen the immediate aftermath of the apocalypse: "It's already too late." But just when you think the record may be allowing itself to be completely engulfed in brooding torment for too long, Marshall (from seemingly across the room), reveals the ace up the band's sleeve (that mixture of crazy, evil chaos and unique character) with one line that intersects with the band: "There will be no leap into hyperspace and, it's already too late." The record's death yelp summarizes the lyrical themes throughout, with Marshall simultaneously unleashing one monstrous scream whilst making exaggerated sex moans. The band may have just told you that there will be no leap into hyperspace, but for the last half hour or so, you were just traveling at fucking warp speed. What a great record.