#i've got a few more options this than than before bc i'm trying to spread it out more thin

[biaswreckmepls]

(Sorry for the delay in the poll y'all, life got in the way)

Remember to please reblog after you have voted, so that we get a larger sample size!

[bots-and-cons]

Heya, I just want to offer some advice on your vent post, bcs I struggle with similar problems regarding selfcare. Having sensory issues + depression and anxiety sucks, and here are some things that help me wrangle my own autistic brain into caring for myself;

Making food fucking sucks, but there are a bunch of stuff that can be eaten in a cup. I know ramen and soups in a cup can be a hit or miss depending on texture, but I found that they are one of the easiest ways to get something warm and not sweet into my body.

On that note oatmeal or muesli or cereal is an option. With oatmeal being a good neutral tasting but filling thing, that you can dump some sugar or salt or whatever in to achieve the taste. When I needed something sweet but filling, I would add sugar and cinnamon. Or some syrup if I wanted some fruity flavor.

Higiene is annoying to do, I can't express that enough. But wet wipes are a saviour in that regard. I use neutral non scented ones, and they help keep the private areas clean when showering is too taxing, and can also be used for a wipe down and a way to freshen up the armpits (I have a fear of stinking, so that helps me a bunch).

I buy them along with toilet paper. People don't care what we buy, and toiletries are on everyones shopping list, but buying stuff together helps me get my anxiety to shut up.

My oral hygene and sweet tooth are mortal enemies. I've got holes and crowns to prove it, so I started working on making brushing easier on my brain. I rinse my mouth with water a few times, and if brushing feels too hard, I put some toothpaste in my mouth and spread it around with my tongue.

It either gets me to grab the toothbrush or I atleast have a slightly fresher taste in my mouth. Surprisingly, I can force myself to eat way easier when my mouth doesn't feel gross.

My struggle was with auditory hallucinations before I got meds that worked, so yea, headphones are life saving when everything is. Extra loud.

The only thing helping me not to bust my hearing when things are REALLY bad, is that warning that shows up on the screen when I try to turn the noise up over the safe limit. It makes me pause, and instead change to some other music that holds my attention better.

I hope some of these help you. I wish I had more to offer, but I myself am also struggling with the piles of laundry and dishes so... Good luck to us both I guess. Putting music on and trying to go autopilot sometimes works for me.

I have no idea what a friendship of 18 years looks like, but your bff kind of reminds me of a friend I had in my hometown. It took me moving away and getting some perspective to realize she was friends with me for the benefits of homework and stuff, and p much nothing else. Or to make a joke at my expense and not get called out for it.

I don't know what you and your bff are like, but from my point of view, she doesn't sound like a best friend. Especially not one that is for Forever, because friends do not make us feel like shit.

It took me some years to learn that, and a good friend I met in the dorms, that helped me realize what kind of person I consider a good friend. Qualities I mean, and she has remained a prime example of a best friend for 8 years now.

This is getting way longer than I intended, but I hope its of some help.

Have a good day/night, and a cookie to help you battle with the stresses you're under 🍪

This is a great advice post tbh, and I'm going to be trying some of these I don't already do. I do have a couple of soups I make very well, even if it's a bit of pain, but then I'll have food for a couple of days. I sometimes eat oatmeal multiple times a week for many days straight, and then I forget about it for like two months, and then I do it again. I like to put some frozen berries into my oatmeal, but it can also be a bit of a hit or miss since the texture sometimes sucks.

Hygiene is indeed a pain in the ass. I learned about the thing with the wet wipes a while back, and I try to remember to use them when I don't want to shower. I have a big problem with actually remembering to do things, so I have to constantly remind myself. I've never been good with brushing my teeth, ever since I started doing it on my own when I was a kid. Since no one was making me do it, I didn't really bother to do it much. Also, it's sensory hell for me and if I try to brush my tongue it's make me gag. So that's fun.

I'm kinda the opposite with the volume thing, since I often feel like even one bar of volume is way too much, so I'm not at danger of hurting my ears, luckily.

I'm probably going to like week's worth of dishes today, and it fucking sucks. I know I shouldn't let them pile up, but I just can't wash them as they get dirty, because that would be every day and I only have so much energy. I know it's disgusting to let them sit for that long but I just can't manage sometimes. Kinda same with the laundry. Everything is piling up, but I'm gonna try to get them done again so I can focus on school stuff.

The friend thing is complicated. After I made that post, she answered my messages the next day, and we talked on the phone. As usual, I didn't really air out any of my concerns and how I felt, because I didn't want to upset her. I just keep swallowing my own feelings in favor of not upsetting someone else and it sucks sometimes. You're probably right about the whole thing tbh, my BFF and I are just both pretty codependent, and it's hard to let go, especially because I have no other friends "IRL" currently.

I hope you can get through whatever stress you're battling against, too. I really appreciate the advice, because it's something I can actually use and not just the "think positive" or "try not being so sensitive" crap.