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duskandcobalt · 8 months

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Stargirl: Part Four

Following her last vision, Elain and Azriel navigate the surprise revelation and the frenzy that comes along with it.

...

Well, well, well... my smutty little darling that was only ever supposed to be one part comes to an end. This last part was intended to be just a little dirty short thing but somehow it turned into a 6k word monster soooo???? idk i had fun writing this, I hope you have fun reading it and I'm so thrilled I could get this out just in time for the last day of @sjmromanceweek 💕💗💞

this can be read as a stand alone but if you'd like to see how elain's sexy little visions came to be, you can find the first part of stargirl here as well as all the other parts in my masterlist xx

18+ please, gratuitous smut and a little bit of breeding kink as a valentine's day treat 💌👀♥️

ENJOY XX

Read on AO3

Elain runs a trembling hand down the front of her dress as she takes a deep breath.

She’s wearing a beautiful ivory gown made of delicate lace that’s almost sheer. Only heavy clusters of floral embroidery cover her from the top of the bodice down to the middle of her thighs where it tapers off before picking up again to form a stunning train that trails dramatically behind her. The dress has long sleeves, also covered in embroidery, but her shoulders and decolletage are left bare - an intentional design choice that she and her seamstress had made with a certain someone in mind.

A veil is ever so carefully placed into the crown of Elain’s intricately woven hair by the practiced hands of the twins when a soft knock sounds from the bedroom door, interrupting the mindless chatter she’d been exchanging with Nuala and Cerridwen.

She catches sight of the male in the reflection of her mirror. His tall, lean frame occupies almost the entire doorway. He’s dressed in an immaculately tailored suit and a small dusk coloured rose is pinned to the lapel of his jacket. His violet eyes soften as they meet hers and the very corners of his lips turn up into a fond smile.

“He’s not going to know what to do with himself when he sees you.” Rhysand says quietly. “You make for a beautiful bride, Elain.”

Elain ducks her head in thanks. The warmth of a blush creeps up her neck and blooms across her cheeks as the nerves that she’s been trying to keep at bay all morning finally settle low in her stomach at her brother-in-law’s sincere compliment and at the reminder of the male waiting for her in the garden.

She couldn’t believe that this was actually happening. Couldn’t believe that she was about to walk down the aisle to her mate.

…

It had been two years since she’d had that vision that had hinted at a truth she hadn’t been prepared to receive. A vision that had shown her this day - a mating ceremony to a dark haired Shadowsinger instead of the son of Autumn as the Cauldron had once suggested.

That single vision had come out of nowhere and thrown her entire life into a spiral.

She’d never forget sitting up in his bed, turning towards him and whispering those words that had turned their entire world upside down.

You’re my mate.

Azriel had only stared at her, still as a statue, as she fumbled over her words in a desperate attempt to explain to him exactly what she’d seen.

The offering of cake. A black ribbon binding her wrist to his.

He’d broken down moments later after finally finding his voice and asking her a few carefully curated questions to understand exactly what she’d seen. He’d clutched her tight to his chest as tears trickled from his eyes and into her hair. She’d never seen him like that before but she understood immediately that the overwhelming feeling that coursed through him was relief.

Relief from the knowledge that he hadn’t been forgotten by the Mother or the Cauldron. From knowing that he hadn’t been deemed unworthy of a mate because of all the blood he’d drawn over the centuries.

They’d gone to Feyre first, clumsily explaining what Elain had seen only to realise they would also need to confess to already having been spending time together. They told Rhys next and though it was perhaps naive of them, neither she nor Azriel had expected that the High Lord would react so poorly to the news.

For all the times that Elain had wished she could be with Azriel without needing to hide from the others, opening themselves up to the wrath of Rhysand for daring to mess with intercourt politics had resulted in a world of pain. He’d torn into Azriel for even thinking of pursuing a mated female, let alone a female mated to an Autumn Court male. For daring to bed her while her mate slept in the same house.

At the time, it had seemed that no matter how many times Elain tried to make it clear that the bond in question wasn’t even a real bond - that she had pursued Azriel just as much as he’d pursued her, that they’d never risked sleeping together when Lucien was in residence - her pleas fell on deaf ears. Rhys had stormed out of his office without sparing her a glance, only giving a stern warning to Azriel to stay the hell away from her.

They hadn’t stayed away from each other, of course. They’d simply resumed what they’d already been doing - sneaking in and out of each other’s rooms in the dead of night and only barely avoiding each other during the days.

There had been countless tears and numerous arguments. An entire war had almost been waged over their claim that the Cauldron had been wrong. Iit had taken almost an entire year of working with various High Lords, priestesses, and other contacts and associates of Rhysand to confirm that something had indeed gone wrong when Elain was submerged in the Cauldron - that a spell had been cast in an attempt to hide her bond to Azriel and guide her in another direction.

It had been confusing and messy and terrible for everyone involved but they had somehow come out on the other end, still together and still hopelessly in love. Now, there was a brand new element to their relationship. A bright, glowing tether that connected their bodies, their souls - already so tangible despite the fact that neither of them had formally accepted the bond.

Azriel, usually so reserved and attention avoidant, had surprised her when he insisted on even having a ceremony. She’d had to talk him out of going down the same path as Nesta and Cassian and after going back and forth too many times to count, Elain had eventually relented and they’d compromised on having the small garden ceremony that had come to her in that vision.

The title of mates had never meant much to her. She’d have chosen him a million times over where there’d been a predetermined connection between them or not. But she knew how much it meant to Azriel, knew that he considered the bond to be a blessing unlike any other.

It was why she attempted to look past the, quite frankly, insane behavior he’d been exhibiting over the past few months. Azriel had turned into something reminiscent of the girls that Elain had grown up with. The ones that became obsessive over their nuptials the second a ring was placed on their finger.

Just because she’d given in to his desire to have a ceremony, it didn’t mean that she hadn’t enjoyed torturing him from time to time when he was difficult about place settings or flowers.

“Never should’ve told you about that stupid vision,” Elain would taunt him, if only to feel the delicious trickle of arousal slither down her spine at the way his shoulders would stiffen and the promise of punishment would spark in his eyes.

Not that he’d ever actually deliver on that promise.

It was the one true point of contention between them. The stubborn male was intent on not formally accepting the bond before the ceremony and would hardly touch her, let alone fuck her, for fear of accidentally solidifying the bond between them before they could have it blessed by a priestess. And though she tried, there was no amount of teasing and taunting she could do that would get him to break.

He even went as far as to refuse food made by her whether she handed it directly to him or not.

It was ridiculous. He was ridiculous.

Azriel had made up for some of it though, meeting her halfway by insisting on incorporating certain aspects of a human wedding - starting with a proposal that had come as a complete surprise a few weeks before they’d broken the curse.

They’d been in the garden one evening, Azriel more quiet than usual as he studied her from over the brim of a chipped tea cup that appeared like a dollhouse toy in the grasp of his large hands. She’d only looked up from her notebook when he gently lifted her feet from his lap and shifted until he was on his knees in the grass beside her.

He had said her name so softly, his eyes gleaming with an unfamiliar quality that they’d later identified as nervousness when they laughed together in bed later, recounting the moment while Elain lifted her hand above their faces until the low fae lights caught the surface of the sparkling sapphire that newly graced her ring finger.

…

That sapphire gleams brighter than ever on her finger as Rhysand steps towards her and offers her his arm.

“Ready?”

He’d come to them after they’d announced their intention to have a ceremony and asked if he could walk Elain down the aisle - a sign of peace and a way of offering them his blessing. Something that she knew meant the world to Azriel after the tense year he and Rhys had had.

“Ready.” Elain swallows, slipping her arm through the crook of his elbow.

Apart from Rhys walking her down the aisle, most of what she’d seen in that vision remains the same. A harp plays as Rhys leads her out to the garden. Bright blooms of flowers are arranged on either side of a makeshift aisle. The sun shines and the Sidra glitters behind them. Nesta and Feyre smile brightly, tears gathering in the corner of their eyes. Cassian gives her a bright smile before clasping the broad shoulder of the handsome male standing next to him.

Elain’s breath catches in her chest when Azriel turns and his eyes land on her. She tries to keep from crying but there’s little she can do to stop the tears from falling when Azriel gives her a smile unlike anything she’d ever seen before, his own eyes shining with tears and admiration for his bride.

The sight of Azriel in his leathers was something Elain often dreamed of when she lay in bed at night, but it only takes one slow pass of her eyes over his body before she realises that the only thing better than Azriel in his leathers, is Azriel in a suit.

The suit is perfectly cut to his body and is befitting of a royal prince - the sash draped across his body, the medallions pinned to his chest - she realises that in a way, he really is dressed the part of a high ranking member of the Night Court and something about seeing him proudly dressed like this for her, makes her heart swell.

It feels like an eternity before she stands in front of him, before Rhys kisses her cheek and gives Azriel a hug. Before Azriel’s wonderfully familiar hands clasp around hers.

“Beautiful.” He gives her fingers a gentle squeeze as his eyes roam over her dress - the delicate lace that frames her exposed neck and shoulders. The embroidery that conceals the part of her that only he would ever see. He doesn’t bother to conceal his satisfied hum of approval as his gaze tracks back up the length of her body to her face.

The priestess takes over then, welcoming all their guests and guiding them through a short ceremony that culminates in an exchange of vows that leaves both of them with happy smiles and tear streaked faces.

They exchange rings after their vows - an homage to Elain’s human heritage but also something she’d quietly insisted on because the possessive part of her wanted him to have a physical marker that made it clear that he was taken to any female or male that dared to set their eyes on him.

Before she knows it, Nyx is teetering over to them, a small plate that holds one cinnamon bun haphazardly cradled in his small, chubby hands.

It’s the final point of difference from her vision - a small change she’d intentionally made to incorporate Azriel’s favourite of her homemade treats into their day. A nod to the day this had all started that only the two of them would understand.

She bends down and kisses Nyx on the forehead, gingerly taking the bun in her fingers before standing and bringing it to Azriel’s lips.

“Eat.” Elain murmurs.

Azriel’s lips close around the soft bun, teeth sinking into the sweet pastry. He swallows and Elain swears she feels the bond between them intensify. Unlike the uncomfortable pull she’d felt once upon a time, this is different. This time it’s desire and admiration and pure love that she feels when it tightens around her ribs.

By the way Azriel is looking at her, she knows he feels the same.

The ribbon is the next and final part of the ceremony. Feyre and Nesta both step forward to wrap a length of black satin around the couple’s wrists - sheepish looks on both of her sister’s faces. Rhysand and Cassian take over from their mates- tightening the ribbon and tying it into a firm bow.

“Remember, Az,” Cassian's eyes shine with mischief. “This stays on until you make her come hard enough to cause an avalanche on Ramiel.”

“Cassian!” Nesta groans, pinching the bridge of her nose, at the same exact time Feyre clasps her hands tight over Nyx’s ears even as she and Rhysand fail to stifle their laugh.

…

They don’t last long after the ceremony. It’s only a couple of turns around the small dancefloor and a few congratulatory conversations before the pull between them becomes too much to bear and Azriel bends down, his lips brushing over the delicate point of her ear as he quietly asks if she’s ready to leave.

He laughs at the eagerness with which Elain responds but she can’t bring herself to be embarrassed - not when she’d felt the absence of his touch so thoroughly for over a month now.

She needed to be alone with him. Needed to get away before the desire got the best of them and put them at risk of doing something obscenely stupid like consummating their bond in the middle of this garden, in front of everyone they held close to their hearts.

After a very quick goodbye to their amused guests, Azriel whisks Elain into his arms and flies directly to the townhouse that Rhys had gifted them as a mating present, grumbling that they may as well have it seeing as they’d already spent the last year or two desecrating every part of it.

No words are exchanged as Azriel lands, still cradling Elain in his arms as he wanders up the path and opens the door, carrying her over the threshold once more.

It was funny really, when she looks back at how far they’d come since that very first time Azriel had flown her here, to this place they could now call home.

She’d been a shell of herself back then, clutching to her human life with a desperation that had almost broken her completely. Despite it all, she’d felt a split second moment of reprieve from the intensity of her grief when Azriel, little more than a stranger to her at the time, carried her over the threshold and set her down with such care before he led her out to the one place he somehow knew she might find some sense of normalcy.

She’d felt it then - upon seeing the kindness in his eyes and feeling the gentleness of his touch - the tiniest inkling of hope that maybe one day she could find happiness in this new place, in this new life.

Sure enough, that little drop of hope had been warranted because just a few years later, Elain is the happiest she’s ever been.

The signs had all been there from the start.

That single strand of hair that had snagged right over his heart should’ve told her all she needed to know.

He carries her upstairs, toeing open the door to the bedroom that once belonged solely to her and Elain’s jaw drops as Azriel finally sets her down and she peels her eyes away from his perfect face to take in the room.

She knew that Feyre and Mor had come by earlier to decorate but she didn’t expect all of this. Her usual lilac linens have been replaced by billowing white sheets. There’s blush coloured rose petals strewn across the bed that match the roses that had framed the aisle and candles were scattered around the room, casting the bed in romantic, flickering golden light.

Azriel’s free arm winds around her waist from behind and his lips follow the path of her shoulder up her neck as he pulls her back towards him. Elain tilts her head up to meet him halfway and his mouth travels along her jaw until his lips hover centimeters from hers.

She feels like every bit of her skin is on fire. She could never imagine that the level of her desire for Azriel would surpass what she felt for him in the past but she was sorely mistaken because what she feels in this moment makes her think that if he didn’t do something to quell the ache thrumming between her legs, she might just die.

“Azriel.” She breathes his name, turning towards him fully and breaking the silence that had settled comfortably between them.

“Elain.” He answers. His fingers press into the plush flesh of her hip, the very tips of them venturing low - teasing at the curve of her backside.

“My mate.” Elain says quietly, raising her hand to cup his face. Her thumb drags along his sharp cheekbone.

“My mate.” He repeats. The word is almost unfamiliar on his lips, like he still can’t quite believe the term is his to use. Azriel brings his lips to hers and her entire body is overcome with a desperate need. “My wife.”

Elain can’t help but whimper as her body curves into his by its own volition. She melts into his searing kiss.

“My husband.”

Azriel lets out a soft moan at that and a slight shift of his stance allows her to feel him hard against her hip.

Elain is suddenly nervous as she pulls away to look up at Azriel. She doesn’t understand why she’s suddenly shy, standing in front of him like an innocent, blushing bride even though they both knew that ship had sailed long ago. He stares back at her, candle light catching the flecks of green in his eyes.

She recognises the wonder there as he takes in the sight of her. It’s a perfect mirror to her own emotions. To the disbelief that they’d actually made it to this moment against all odds.

“Not sure how we’re supposed to consummate anything with our wrists bound together.” Elain frowns, her voice shaking slightly. “I won’t be able to get you out of this suit.”

“I think it’s more of a symbolic thing.” Azriel smiles, kissing her once more to ease her nerves. His fingers slip from her waist to their wrists, deftly plucking at the knot of black satin until it comes loose and their hands are freed. He sets the ribbon down and fixes her with a look that sends a shiver down her spine.

He motions for her to turn and then his hands are in her hair, gently removing pins until her hair falls in a gentle, albeit slightly messy, golden wave down her back. He gathers it to the side and more kisses are placed to the sensitive place where her neck meets her shoulder.

Azriel’s fingers find the buttons that run down the back of her dress and he begins to undo them slowly. Elain knows that he’s doing it on purpose. That even on this special day, he wouldn’t dream of missing the opportunity to have her beg.

But Elain, for once, won’t let him win. She somehow finds the will power to hold still as he undoes her dress and drags it down her arms and over her torso until it falls to the floor and she’s left standing in front of him in nothing except for the very expensive scrap of ivory lace that covers her sex and the shiny rings on her finger.

She reaches for his suit jacket and helps him maneuver out of it and then she steps around to his back to undo the buttons of his shirt around his wings. And maybe, just maybe, during the process of ridding him of his shirt, she lets her knuckles smooth over a part of the delicate membrane that has him gritting out her name in warning.

Elain grins, moving back around to his front to reach for the buttons of his fine pants - slowly undoing them as he kicks off his shoes just in time for her to slide his trousers and undershorts down his legs.

She can’t help the way her eyes linger on the proud length of him. On the small bead of moisture gathered at the tip that gleams in the glow of the candles, practically calling for her to put her lips on him. She’s so distracted that she barely even registers Azriel reaching back for the ribbon he’d placed on the desk a few minutes ago.

“I can think of better uses for this ribbon.” Azriel’s eyes flick up to meet hers as he smooths out the ribbon and dangles it from his fingertips.

“I can think of something even better.” Elain plucks the ribbon from his hands and backs him towards the bed with a single finger against his chest until he’s laying down. His eyes shimmer with amusement as she motions for him to put his hands above his head but he silently follows her instructions.

She kneels next to him, leans down and tries so very hard to ignore the sweet press of his lips to her sternum as her fingers make quick work of wrapping the ribbon around both of his wrists before securing the remaining length to the wooden posts of her headboard.

“You have the rest of our lives to touch me whenever and however you’d like. Let’s see how long you can last before you’re begging to touch your wife.”

She moves to settle herself on his lap but he stops her with a slight shift of his knees that sends her sliding further up his torso.

“On my tongue first.”

Elain bites down on her lower lip, her core already tightening in anticipation as she shifts further up and carefully places a knee above each of his shoulders, mindful of his wings.

“Look at you.” Azriel’s eyes are fixed on the damp lace covering her center. On the gleam of arousal that covers her inner thighs. “Such a mess already and I haven’t even begun.”

“So much talking.” Elain grumbles, her face flooding with heat at just how wet she was for him when all he’d done was take her dress off.

“Make me stop.” Azriel challenges. She huffs but slowly lowers her hips until the defined tip of his nose brushes over her, dragging her soaked underwear over her clit in a delicious slide of friction.

It’s far from the first time he’s had her like this but it is the first time he hasn’t been able to use his hands. It’s in this moment that Elain realises just how much she relies on him to guide her down to his face. To pull her hips closer and closer, to help her rock against him as she rides him. With his hands restrained, it all falls back on her to gain the confidence to use him like this.

“Sit.” The single word is laced with pure demand and she can sense that Azriel’s patience is slipping. His need to get his mouth on her overruling any of the previous gentleness he’d shown her this evening.

She does as she’s told and her hands fly out to grasp for purchase on her headboard at the first pass of Azriel’s mouth over the lace that covers her. He doesn’t give her a moment to catch her breath before he uses his teeth to tug the lace to the side as best as he can and then his tongue is on her, eagerly tasting her, consuming her with long, effortless strokes.

“I’ve missed this.” He groans against her skin. His tongue dips inside her. “ I’ve missed you.”

She doesn’t have the words to admonish him. To tell him that he could’ve had her this whole time if only he hadn’t been so stubborn. But a month without having him like this has taken its toll and Elain finds that she’s utterly incapable of forming any words or sounds that aren’t a simple keening moan as she rolls her hips and chases the sensation quickly building low and intense in her stomach. Her thighs tremble, her fingers clench around the wooden posts of her bedframe and before she knows it, the wave of pleasure crests and she slumps forward - the already precarious rhythm of her hips falters as she comes hard and fast on his tongue.

Azriel’s mouth doesn’t stop working her until she pulls off of him completely but even then, she isn’t granted a single moment of reprieve besides a couple seconds to catch her breath.

He calls in his shadows and icy, invisible hands are firm around her waist, guiding her back down to where she’d started. Her hands find his cock as his shadows stay with her, slipping in between her legs and over her breasts in feather light caresses that have her aching for more despite just having come mere seconds ago.

Elain raises her eyes to look up at Azriel as she lowers her mouth to his cock. At the first slide of her tongue over his head, a particularly daring shadow slips inside her. The feeling of it is one she knows well, so similar to Azriel’s own fingers.

Elain pulls off of him for a second, glaring up at him. The menacing look she’d been going for is cut short when she gasps as the shadow still inside her presses hard against her upper wall.

“You said,” Azriel starts, eyes squeezing shut when she takes him in her mouth again. “You said I couldn’t touch you. You never said my shadows couldn’t.”

“Not fair.” Elain mumbles around the length of him, unwilling to stop the movement of her lips and tongue. She only takes him deeper, relishing in the way his hips lift to push himself further down her throat.

“Did you think I’d forgotten?” More of his shadows are in her hair now, tugging at her roots with delicious pressure. “All those times you’ve taunted me this past month? Did you think I would forget?”

She gives him a subtle shake of her head, hollowing her cheeks around him all the while.

She’d been praying that he wouldn’t forget, that he’d catalogue all those moments until he could finally deliver on that promise of punishment she’d seen gleaming in his eyes each time she’d deliberately taunt him with her words or actions.

“Touch me.” She doesn’t know how the tables have turned so quickly. How in a split second, she’s pulled off of him and has relinquished all control to him - begging him to touch her instead of the other way around as she’d initially planned. “Azriel, please.”

His shadows aren’t enough and too much time has passed. They’ve put it off too long and the thread between them has grown too taut. She wants his hands. His fingers. She wants him inside her.

Elain blinks and Azriel’s hands are free. She blinks again and she’s on her back in the exact spot he had just been. His hazel eyes burn into hers as his hands - those glorious, beautiful scarred hands - smooth over every inch of her body that’s within their reach.

“Please.” She begs again, unsure as to what she’s even asking for. All she knows is that there’s greater forces at play and her wants and desires are careening dangerously out of control.

“Okay.” Azriel nods and suddenly it’s clear as day to her that he’s experiencing the exact same thing on the other side of the bond glowing between them. There’s a new sense of urgency to his words. To his actions. His calloused thumbs drag over her nipples. “Okay, my love.”

He moves a hand inbetween her legs and pushes her thighs further apart and then she feels him, hot and heavy against her sex. He drags his cock over her twice, coating himself in the arousal he’s pulled from her. A moment later he’s inside her and Elains swears it’s the best thing she’s ever felt in her entire life.

“It feels…” She can’t finish her sentence. She’s too overcome by a wave of emotions so intense that it wracks through her body. That thread between them that had seemed so tangible for the past month had suddenly solidified into something else entirely. She could feel it in her blood. In each and every nerve. Could feel him. Each of her emotions - all the joy and the pleasure and the relief - it was all amplified. Doubled. Because she could feel his twin emotions on the other side of this new connection.

It had snapped. The bond had finally snapped into place once and for all.

Elain laughs, high and bright, and full of disbelief because each time she had thought that what she felt for him couldn’t possibly be topped, she had been proven wrong.

“I know.” Azriel sweeps back the hair clinging to her sweat slick forehead and keeps his eyes on hers.

“It just…” Elain gasps, fingernails clawing at his back in a desperate attempt to get even closer to him. To feel even more of him.

“I know.” Azriel repeats, lowering his mouth to hers in an all consuming kiss that renders her utterly useless. “I felt it, too.”

Azriel continues to whisper sweet nothings into her skin as he takes her, his hips meeting hers as he delivers long smooth strokes that have her crying his name.

“Want you to come with me, okay?” He says gently, waiting until her eyes focus on his and she nods that she had in fact heard him before he bends one of her knees to her chest and picks up his pace.

The new position has tears forming in the corner of her eyes from the sheer bliss that courses through her. It’s a feeling that’s only heightened when he brings a hand in between their bodies to thumb at her clit.

“I meant every word.” Azriel murmurs, his forehead pressed tight to hers. “You’re my sun, Elain.”

The smooth movement of his hips stutters and she knows he’s close.

I spent the first part of my life shrouded in darkness with only shadows for company. I thought I’d learnt what it was to live in the light of day again but I didn’t truly know what it meant to feel the warmth of the sun until you looked at me for the first time.

The beautiful words Azriel had said to her earlier in the garden echo in her head and she can’t stop the sob that escapes her at the reminder of the vows they’d made. At the promises they’d sworn - the declarations to love and to cherish each other for the rest of their long, immortal lives.

“I love you.” Her hands land on either side of his face and she holds him to her, kissing him deeply as he spills inside her. Her muscles contract around him, an endless pulsing sensation that makes her ears ring and her eyes go blurry.

He says it back to her - three words chanted over and over again in combination with her name as he fills her.

Her blood pounds through her veins and her heart feels like it’s going to explode out of her chest. No amount of reading and research into mating bonds would have prepared her for the magnanimity of what she felt in this moment.

It isn’t until Azriel pulls out of her and kneels in between her legs that her eyes focus and she regains any sense of who or where she is. He gently pries her legs further apart and his eyes darken at the sight in front of him. She watches as he takes two of his fingers and collects the come smeared on her thighs. It coats his fingers and the sight of a small bit of it sliding off the knuckle of his middle finger and landing over the gold band on his ring finger is so beautifully filthy that it has her holding back a moan.

“Back where it belongs.” Azriel says the words with a satisfied, purely male smirk and Elain’s breath hitches as he slides his fingers back in her, fucking his spend back inside her. She shivers at the sensation of cold metal grazing her skin.

“Sometimes when I see you like this - your pretty cunt so wet and swollen, so full of my come that it drips out…” He pauses for a second, eyes fixated on the easy slip of his fingers in and out of her. “I wonder why I still take the tonic every morning.”

Elain summons the energy to prop herself up on her elbows so she can look at him. She’s shocked at his admission, at all that it entails.

“If you want me to call you daddy, Azriel, all you had to do was ask.”

It’s a weak attempt at humour, a pathetic attempt to buy her some time as she tries to figure out what to say.

Azriel’s head tips back and he laughs in that way that makes her heart ache with love for him.

“I’m serious, Elain.” He gives her a soft smile, his fingers still moving within her. “If you want that with me, I… I’d be honoured.”

“I need,” she gasps when his fingers curl inside her, pressing against the spot he knows will get her where he wants her to be. “To think.”

“Okay.” He agrees. “Whenever you’re ready. If you’re ever ready.”

“After this…” Elain’s back arches off the bed and her legs threaten to close but Azriel holds her open for him with his other hand.

“After the frenzy.” He completes her thought for her and watches, completely enamored as her head tilts back and her slender fingers frantically clutch at the sweat soaked sheets.

“With a clear head.” She barely manages to get out the words. “We’ll talk about it.”

She’d need a clear head to discuss that particular subject because right now, with how unbelievably aroused she was at the idea of his fingers pushing his come back inside her - back where it belongs - she’d do just about anything he asked of her.

Azriel only leans forward, crowding her body with his as he once again sends her falling over the edge. Her moans are swallowed eagerly by his mouth.

“Always take me so well.” He praises her. “So beautiful each and every time you come for me.”

When she finally settles, utterly spent against the mattress, Azriel moves to pull back but Elain clambers to keep him with her and she finds herself startled by her own automatic reaction to him moving even a fraction of an inch away. She buries her face in his neck, drawing in the scent of him - that cedar scent that is now completely intertwined with notes of jasmine and honey- and the depth of her desire terrifies her.

Elain can’t fathom that there will be a time where she won’t need to feel the weight of him on top of her. Couldn’t imagine that there’d be a second of the foreseeable future in which she wouldn’t need to feel the warmth of his skin under the tips of her fingers. The possessive quality that already lived deep within her bones had grown into a whole new monster because even though she’s been told over and over again that it’s the males who get territorial once a mating bond has been accepted, the way in which she needs to have Azriel all to herself makes her feel confident that she could rip someone to shreds if they looked at him for even a second too long.

“I never want to leave this bed.” Elain sighs, fingers slipping down the expanse of his back as she arches upward, her breasts pressing against his chest. She’s delighted when the shift of her body allows her to feel him hard against her stomach again because despite her sore muscles and the tiredness seeping into her bones, she’s somehow immediately ready for him. Desperate to have him inside her once more.

“Too bad.” Azriel’s lips skate up the column of her throat until his lips are right over her ear. “Because I intend to fuck you on every single surface in this house.”

He sinks into her again and Elain is convinced once and for all that this frenzy might never end.

#elriel #elriel fic #sjmromanceweek2024 #elain x azriel #elain archeron #azriel #so very nervous for this to go out bc i've been putting off finishing this for far far far too long #my writing #acotar fanfiction

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samcarpentersgirlfriend · 2 months

Note

Wes getting attacked (but living) and being comforted by gn reader

found this in the drafts, sorry it took so long </3

summary: above

includes: gn!reader, swearing, maybe some light angst?? (no mention of judy or her death idk pretend it doesn’t happen here if you want to)

word count: 1k

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

“Wes! Wes! I came as soon as I- Oh my God,”

It’s like seeing your boyfriend laying here all bandaged and bruise makes the situation sickeningly real instead of just some twisted nightmare. “Wes,” is all you can bring yourself to breathe out.

You think you’re going to be sick.

“Hey,” Wes croaks out, and God, he sounds so much worse than he looks - if that’s even possible. His skin is an eeriely translucent, and white and tubes jut out from his body from all sorts of unnatural angles. You can practically feel your heart sink to the floor.

“Oh my God,” you repeat once more, stumbling over to his side. You know you should do more - offer your boyfriend some stupid semblance of comfort and security, but you need a minute to pull yourself together - for both of your sakes. Wes wasn’t exactly frail, and the idea that one day you might see him this vulnerable, this bare, hadn’t ever crossed your mind.

You reach out to cup his face, running a finger over his cheek tentatively. It’s one of the only places you can touch, one of the only that isn’t dressed or stitched up somehow. Wes leans into the touch as his eyes flicker closed, letting out a pained sigh.

“What happened?” You urge, voice barely above a whisper. It can’t be any worst than the nightmarish images you’ve conjured up in your mind - visions of your boyfriend screaming for help, a knife tearing through his beautiful skin like paper as he bleeds out all alone.

“Fucking Ghostface,” he breathes out, attempting a hollow laugh but wincing when the effort is evidently too painful for him. “He got in the house, took me by surprise. I tried to fight him off but he was stronger than me. I coul- I couldn’t-“

Telltale tears well in his eyes, and you notice the way he attempts to rapidly blink them away.

“Hey, it’s okay. I got you.” You clasp his fingers in yours as you press a soft kiss to his temple, and that’s all it takes for Wes to burst into tears. You don’t push him to speak or even stop crying; you simply sit besides him, grasping onto his hand as if it’s a lifeline. God, you feel so damn useless, but what is there for you to do? What do you say to your boyfriend who almost got stabbed to death? How do you even start to fix this?

The two of you sit like that for a while - Wes shaking from the effort of his tears, your hands still interlocked. You can’t help but think just how close you were to loosing him- loosing all of this. How you’d never see that stupid grin and bleach blonde hair ever again. How you’d be forced to live, expected to go on in darkness after the blinding light that was Wes had flickered out. It’s enough to make you want to scream.

But you can’t. Not now. And not in front of Wes.

“I’m sorry,” he says, low and strained. His red eyes meet yours, and all of a sudden, you’re angry. Angrier than you think you’ve ever felt before. Not at Wes - never at Wes - but just at how damn unfair this all is. Why was Wes - your Wes- falling apart and barely alive when the monster who did this to him was still out there? How was it fair that he feels like he has to apologise for you for daring to cry about almost dying?

“No,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady. Your ire must seep deep into your tone though, because Wes glances back up at you before turning his head away once more. Gently, you turn his chin so his eyes are back on you, and you repeat yourself again - this time, much more softly.

“No. Don’t you dare apologise, you hear me? You’ve got nothing to be sorry about. And I’m not angry at you, baby. It’s just-“ you sigh before you speak again. “It’s just that… I hate whoever did this to you. When we find out who it is, I swear, I’m gonna fucking kill them myself. “

Wes smiles. “Didn’t know I had my own personal bodyguard.” The fact that he still has the ability to crack jokes after all that’s happened, you realise, makes you want to smile and sob - preferably at the same time. Wes really is the most resilient person you know, but goddamn it, he shouldn’t have to be.

“I wish I was your body guard,” you reply, lips quirked upwards. “Then I could be with you all the time. Means you wouldn’t have been by yourself when it happened.”

At that, Wes’s gaze snaps up, all traces of his grin gone in an instant. “And have you lying here next to me - fuck, instead of me? Have you dead? No way in hell.” His tone leaves no room for argument, so you you simply keep quiet. Neither you nor Wes speak, the two of you presumably both lost in your own racing thoughts. It strangely borders on comfortable, and more importantly, it’s enough.

After a while, you shuffle closer to your boyfriend, carefully resting your head in the crook of his neck as he places his head on top of yours. It’s the best thing you can think of right now - you can’t wrap Wes up and tell him everything’s okay because it’s not. None of this is okay.

“I love you,” you murmur into the silence, because you need Wes to know. Need him to know how grateful you are to have him, how grateful you are that he’s alive. Because honestly? You have no idea what you’d do without him - you dread to even think. “And I’ll be here for you every single step of the way. Promise.” You hold out your pinky with the last word - it’s childish, you know that, but after everything, maybe that’s exactly what you need right now.

“Love you too,” he echoes, interlocking his finger with yours before squeezing it tight. “More than you’ll ever know.”

#scream x reader #scream imagine #wes hicks #wes hicks imagine #wes hicks x reader #wes hicks x y/n #dylan minette x reader #dylan minnette #scream 2022 #scream x you #scream 5 #scream headcanons #scream #fanfiction

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malexmalesstuff · 1 year

Note

Can I request Robert Pattinson x shy Boyfriend reader where Robert takes the readers virginity and lets the reader fuck his mouth and ass while praising the reader?

Requestlist

Robert Pattinson x Male Reader

warnings: this isn’t good smut. reader is 19, Robert his current age. Age gap. sad reader, kinda depressed reader? Angst ig. Shy soft dom reader. Bottom Robert. idk kinda ditched the request sorry. Girl idk what tense i wrote this in

A/n: Realised i hate writing smut.

A/n: Couldn’t think of anything further. 300 likes, 50 reblogs for a part 2.

———

“I’m home!” I heard Robert say, then a bang. You flinched, like you always do. The door was always so loud, for no reason. He just came back from filming his new movie, ‘the batman.’ He was away filming for about 4 months, not including the months during and before covid-19.

Hearing his voice, made me smile. I missed him, I missed his smile, I missed his hugs, i missed his everything. There was a difference in hearing his voice over the phone and in real life.

You felt this warmth inside you once you saw him walking in the living room, a warmth that had been gone for a long time. You tried to smile, but you hadn’t been feeling the happiest for awhile, your smile was weak. But you tried your best.

“Hey baby, are you okay?” He asked me, noticing my forced smile. I felt so weak, and happy at the same time. He rushed walked over to the big couch i was on, getting on his knees to hug me.

“Yes, i’m okay.” I lied to him, my voice was weak. As we pulled out of the hug, i grabbed his face. “please, never leave so unannounced like that ever again.” I tell him, as i feel my eyes tear up. Trying my best not to breakdown. My vision went blurry, and breathing became harder to control.

As Robert tried to speak, no words came out. His eyes started to tear up aswell, he was lost for words. Regret was the only emotion he showed, it was loud. His jaw sharpened, and he chocked on his own words.

“I-i’m sorry.” he said also trying his best not to breakdown.

- time skip (tell if you want me to make an angst fic)

We where now laying in bed, watching tv. I was laying on his bare chest, my hand on his stomach. I felt him kiss my head, giving small kisses. I moved my thumb up and down over his stomach, knowing that made him feel a certain type of way. “fuck I missed this.” He says under his breath thinking I didn’t hear him.

I wanted to continue, but I didn’t know what to do. I have never done anything like this. My heart beat start to go quicker, I heard his do the same.

“Do you want to do this?” He asked me, knowing i had never done anything like this before.

“Yes, I want to do this.”

“Okay baby.” He said as he made us switch positions, so where he was now laying on my abdomen. I was confused by this, thinking in my mind he was a top. He took off my joggers.

“Wait, ur not a top?” I asked him, confused.

“No i’m not, is that okay?” He said.

“Yes ofc, just tell me what to do?” I reassured him

“Okay, well there’s actually not so much to instruct. Just kinda go with what you think you’re supposed to do, ill tell you if you need to stop.” He tells me, with a weak but beautiful smile. I can feel my cheeks turn red.

“Okay, go ahead.” I say, giving him permission. He took this opportunity and took of my underwear. He takes it in his hand and slowly moving it up and down.

I slowly started to get harder. He started to build ip the pace, making small twisting movements now and then. It gave me this feeling, i had never felt like this before. It was hard to describe.

“Fuck, I didn’t know you were this big.” He praised me, making groaning noises. He leaned his head towards it and started to give it kisses. Then out of nowhere he wrapped his lips around it. He moved his tongue in circular motions, going slowly up and down

I moaned, at first it hurt a little. But soon after that turned into a good feeling. You wanted rob to go faster, but you were scared to do anything.

“Can i?” I asked while grabbing his hair. He nodded yes, so you went for it. Moving my hand faster. *bop* *bop* *bop* I’ve never felt anything like this before.

“Fuck, just like that.” I moaned. I was holding his had still, and fucking his mouth. Hearing muffled noises from him.

end.

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idkfitememate · 7 months

Text

I’m So Sorry

૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა Pairings : GN! Freshly Turned Demon! Reader x Tanjiro & Nezuko (+ others mentioned)

૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა W.K. : 2.6k

໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ Tags/CW&TW : Angst to fluff, many much death, mental crisis

໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : Got bored couldn’t sleep so here are my jumbled up thoughts from too late, sorry if it’s misspelled or not GN (plus idk who the character you’re speaking too is as I write this note) I’m not in an aware state of mind rn LMAOOOO-

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry-”

Over and over you repeated those words to a still Tanjiro as you clutched at his pants, kneeing on the pebble-ridden ground.

Behind you and in front of him was a desolated village, corpses strung about in different ways.

Blood soaked into your skin and caked your hair. The iron stench followed you as your fingers forced the crimson liquid onto this clothes, taunting him with your sin.

That same sin that left your mouth a bloody mess.

He could recall a time, a much happier time, when he would call to you on summer days and you’d both sit in your worn and hand-me-down clothes and shoes, holes stitched closed and teeth missing, in the middle of flower fields. One making a flower crown for the other as you both stared into the bright blue sky speckled with fluffy white clouds.

How you’d knock your heads together, you always complaining about how hard his was - like stone you’d say - when you both laid in the tall grass.

How your hand would encompass his as you dragged him through the streets of the small town down the mountain from where he lived.

Where he lived…

Turning away from your still sobbing form, he took a glance at the mountain in the distance.

His mountain.

… Once upon a time, that had been your nickname for him.

“My Mountain.”

It was meant to show how he was the one thing keeping you grounded, something to look and gaze upon in awe and wonder. A force of nature not to be trifled with and a pillar of hope amongst men.

… His sword felt heavy in his hand. A part of him itching to get it over with. He’d raise his arm up high to the gods and slash it down with honor. To feel the blood on his skin.

Your blood.

Another part desperately wanted… no. Needed to understand why. Why you choose to become this, this is… if you choose.

A scene of thick snow in a barren forest played through his mind. That same stench that floated around you filled his nose with the sharp coolness that winter often brought. A heavy weight on his back as tears blurred his vision, causing him to misstep and fall, tumbling down a small… it was larger than a hill but smaller than a cliff, he reasoned.

That horrid growling that haunted his dreams. It had gotten better as months passed, but that first growl he heard had been etched into him, into his very soul. Stitched into his being as a driving force to ensure he never heard it again.

That she’d never make that noise again.

Your wails broke him out of his trance, cold gaze meeting your puffy eyelids as you sobbed louder, his eyes locking onto your sharpened teeth, still stained with blood, something small stuck to your canines.

Hair and flesh.

His stomach twisted but he forced the feeling down. With how wide your mouth was opened, he could see down your maw and into your throat. He watched as it flexed and moved, gyrated almost, as you forced those retched screams and cries from your throat, begging for some kind of mercy.

He was sickened, as he had every right to be. You were no longer human. You had committed a terrible sin, his mind reminded. Unlike the one he was trying to save, you gave into those urges, those horrid, vile and canabalistic desires.

Though, could they be called canabalistic anymore?

You weren’t human.

Your sharpened nails tore through the fabric of his pants, gracing his skin with red lines that slowly began to bleed. Your eyes, when they opened, had oddly shaped pupils and shining colors, entrancing almost. Your skin was unnaturally colored, with bulging veins running across the surface. Your hair was a shade no humans could ever reach, shining and plentiful and in seemingly good health, unlike when you were… alive.

He remembers when you both had met for the first time.

He was younger and his father was in much better shape, taking both coal and wood down the mountain with his son not far behind.

Your mother owned a small stand that sold small hand-made trinkets and otherwise made from wood.

He was hugged to his father’s leg as your mother bought wood directly from him to carve, her fingers marred and covered with bandages. He then saw you.

Your face was sunken and your eyes just a bit too big for your head. Or perhaps it was the fact that your head was just practically the skull, no fat or anything of the sort. It was the same for your body.

Small and thin, your clothes hung baggy off your body, almost looking two sizes too big for you. Your hair was thin and ragged, looking like a doll with its hair pulled out in chunks.

Despite this, you smiled at the other with far too many missing teeth, waving with your also bandaged hands.

He waved back.

Looking at you now as snot and tears dibbled pathetically down your face and into your mouth, that of which then drooled lazily onto the earth, he could still see some of the old you, the one he knew, in there.

They way the breeze shook you gently as though it would take your fragile body with it - no matter how light - or the way he had saw you hungrily shoving fistfuls of the meat down your mouth as though it might be stolen from you, how you shivered and jittered when you saw him in excitement before slowly beginning to shake and cry uncontrollably.

A small part of him felt bad, with how you crawled towards him on hands and knees, practically begging him to forgive you. How you prostrated yourself before him as though that would change anything, pleading with him to ‘help you’ and to ‘save you’.

His mind screamed that you were beyond saving.

That you were nothing like his sister.

He hadn’t even noticed his own crying until he felt sharpened claws on his cheek, though they weren’t yours as they were still buried to the hilt in his leg.

Instead, his gaze locked onto pink serpent like eyes, veins noticeable as the pupils dilated and contracted with visible worry. Long black hair with orange ends blocked you from his line of sight as the one he was doing this - all of this - stood before him.

His sister.

She turned to look at you, that same mixture of disgust yet pity rushing over her, he could smell it.

The siblings stood and stared down at your form as you continued to wail and cry. His sibling at his side gently grasped the blade in his shaking hand as she helped him raise it skyward, her palm gripping the back of his.

But just before they could release the blade-

“Wait!! Please!!”

A females voice called out from the carnage.

And out from your tiny hut at the end of the village crawled your mother.

She looked better than she had in the past, her skin having a much healthier glow than it had last time they had saw her, and she was much more steady on the old crutch the boy had seen her using as he left town to help his sister at the very start of their journey.

She hobbled over to your crying form, ‘shushing’ you and bending down, the crutch falling with a ‘thud’. She grabbed your head and rested it on her chest, running a hand through your hair as you continued to cry and beg for forgiveness. Tongue and throat bleeding from how worn they had become from your screams and hollers.

“I’m here… mothers here… you were doing so good… I know you didn’t mean too…” Her words settled over the scene like freshly fallen snow.

Her clothes and skin were untainted by your sin, a stark contrast to you, the boy, the girl - who had all but been drenched in blood by this point - and the bodies of those around you.

He couldn’t bear to look into their faces as he knew he’d recognize far too many of them.

Far to many lives snatched away.

He wondered how your mother, bless her heart and soul, could even look at you in this time. She obviously knew that you were the cause of this carnage and chaos, so how could she?-

“After you left,” she began, her words slicing through his train of thought, “the people turned on us. I could no longer offer my goods and services as we had no one to chop wood.”

You shook and shivered in her grasp, heaving heavily, greedily taking in massive gulps of air as though you deserved it despite the lives you took.

“It got to a point where we were forced to survive off the scraps and otherwise. Our home was taken from us and we were left in the alleys, begging to whomever would listen.”

Your voice was gone so you whimpered into her chest, listening deeply to her beating heart, something you would never allow to stop as long as it was in your power.

“Then one night, under the shadow of the moon, a man wondered into our quaint little alley. His eyes were as red as a plum, his hair as black as ink. His suit was western, black, white, and embroidered with gold.”

The boy watched as his sister’s eyes grew wide for a moment before lowering into a glare. He could hear your growl slightly from your face pressed into your mother’s neck.

“He attacked in a moment, speaking something of ‘not much, but it’ll do.’ He went for me first, I assumed it was because of my naturally weak state, so I resigned to my fate with little resistance, hoping he would spare my child in good faith. But instead, they jumped on his back, throwing hands on his eyes and head butting him, much like you would’ve, they said.”

She sighed, then moved your head to her thighs, you nuzzling into them with a whine.

“He pushed them into a wall, then jabbing a finger into their forehead. He glanced coldly at me, telling me I’d make a ‘Good first meal’. That was the day we learned of… Demons”

Her voice shuddered as she continued to run fingers through your hair.

“Though, when they awoke, they did not attack me, they stared. We learned the next morning of their vulnerability to the sun, I quickly hid them away. Forced them down from their sudden hungers when they showed, forcing them to sleep instead.”

The boy glanced to his sister. That was something you had in common, it would seem.

Sleep to hide the hunger pains.

“They were doing great, up until a few hours ago. Someone had taken things… too far. He stole my crutch, demanding I wed him despite my decrepit form, claiming he had eyes on me before my late husband. And when I said no, he slammed me to a wall, saying I had no say in the matter and he was to wed me anyway. That I should’ve felt happy that someone even glanced my way anymore, that I was ungrateful for not jumping on the opportunity, especially with a child living in poverty with me. I, of course, still said I objected, and then he… he slapped me. Something inside them snapped I tried to hold them back but… I suppose they were just tired with how they all dared treat us. Either as monsters tormenting us, or by-standers doing nothing.”

All eyes melted into your form as you snored lightly, chest finally rising and lowering at a normal pace. Tears still ran down your face, however.

“Truly, they are sorry. Don’t you understand?”

Her hand went to the boys sister.

“You hold onto one just as closely as I. Do we not share a similar sorrow?”

‘We do.’ They boy though, wanting nothing more than to steal his sister away from this world, to stow her away from this worlds gaze till the end of time.

And yet, he had a duty to the people, and you had broken that cardinal sin.

So with his still raised hand, connected to his sister, he whispered an apology to both you and your mother, before swinging it down before her eyes.

Your head rolled peacefully off to the side, a smile and ‘thank you’ on your lips as you faded away, the dust of your form clawing into the air.

In your place, your mother wailed.

Two pairs of arms wrapped around her, grief filling the town as all three began to wept for innocents lost and time never to return now that it had been lost. As they huddled like a family, kneeling on the dirt pathway, as your mother’s kimono became drenched in your sin, the blood of others.

As the sun began to rise and they all moved into a still standing home, taking off their shoes as they entered. As they laid down onto the futon together on the tatami, cuddled into each other’s warmth.

Sobs dying down and becoming echos of the past as three heartbeats became one, breaths slowing to near halts as they reluctantly relaxed and gave into the gentle hands of sleep.

Then, Tanjiro woke up.

Surrounded by a softly snoring Nezuko and curled up Zenitsu who grumbled with the foot of a starfish-posed Inosuke in his face to his right.

On his left?

You and your mother, her skin, nails, and eyes matching yours as you both cuddled to his side to share warmth. His eyes met hers as she smiled.

“Thank you… for saving us from that awful fate Tanjiro…”

Her lips curled into a smile as you muttered something in your sleep, her arm reaching over you to push you into her body. Her arm continued to stretch, petting the redheads head.

“Your kindness truly is a gift of the gods…”

She yawned, licking her lips, before letting her head rest on the pillow given to her and you to share.

“Thank you…”

Tanjiro smiled at the people around him.

At his family.

Feeling safe and protected, he let himself drift off, feelings of comfort and contentment rushing through him like the roaring waves of the ocean or a flame burning bright within.

Yes… This was home.

And he’d do anything to protect it.

໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : Alright that’s enough writing okay byyyyeeeeee I’m gonna go to sleep nowwwww Good niigghgttttttt

I’m delirious :3

#kny #kny x reader #tanjiro kamado #nezuko kamado #x reader #x gn reader #x gn y/n #gn reader #demon reader #Ik I said it’s like 1-2:30 an rn but I just ate like five chocolates #I’m ruining my body but it’s kinda fun/funny so im alright wit it #hehe

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carniv0reev · 4 months

Text

There Goes My Mind.

yo let’s go my first ahs fic!! i hope you guys like it, trying my best with this one LOL. i’ve always wanted to write as Kai, he’s such a interesting character and i’m glad i could finally get a plot to do it with. idk if i really like this… also pls ignore any typos

It’s been a day after Kai found out that he had falsely accused Winter and took her life, his mental health had been drastically reducing for a while now. But this was definitely a shove into that darkness, a darkness in him that he does not recognize and sees it as something else. It will ultimately be his downfall.

it’s been a few weeks since i rewatched cult, so forgive me if anything is a bit off. and i’m going to be adding some headcannons into this fic to give kai some more character!

tags !! @coentinim @fear-is-truth @nahoyasboyfriend IF ANYONE ELSE WANTS A TAG PLS COMMENT AND LMK

Today felt like one of the longest in a while to Kai, he had locked himself in his room. Which was something he never did, he knew it was important for humans to stay social as they are a social species. But today Kai couldn’t find the energy to talk to anyone, he was trapped within his own head. He didn’t have space for anyone else.

Kai hated feeling this way, it made him feel weak and it frustrated him, only making him even more of a mess. He would try to tell himself that it was okay to feel this way, that it’s okay to cry. But that shadow in his head, that voice told him otherwise.

He sat on his bed staring at a mirror before him that was on the wall, his dark eyes full of guilt and grief. The house didn’t feel same without Winter in it, and it was all his fault.

That realization sunk in, Kai’s eyes stung and his vision grew blurry with tears.

“Fuck.” He hissed, letting his head fall into his hands. Kai was so tired of crying, he couldn’t stop, his emotions were overwhelming him.

For so long he put up this wall to push back these emotions to stay strong, to show his people they could depend on him. But walls can only withstand so much pressure, and Kai had cracked.

He could hear the laughter of his men down in the basement, but something else sounded within the house. Muffled crying. Kai sniffed and lifted his head from his hands, his face red from the pressure on his head by his hands.

As Kai tried to listen for it, everything went silent even the basement. The house stood silent, as if the world stopped. But there it was again, a woman weeping.

Kai stood to his feet quickly at the sound, on high alert he looked around the room then walked to his door.

Weep. Weep.

He knew whose voice it was, no one better. It was his sisters cries, coming from somewhere in the house. Kai hallucinated, but he didn’t see it as that. He saw it as a gift.

Kai opened the door and stepped into the hall, as he stepped outside and looked down the hallways they seemed to stretch on forever. A dizzying feeling struck him in the head, sending a wave of pain throughout his body. He inhaled sharply and placed a hand on his head, his beautiful blue locks now gone in an effort to prove his devotion.

There it was again, the weeping that put a pit in Kai’s stomach. But this time it was coming from his basement, he could pin point the gut wrenching sound this time.

Kai rushed down to the basement, throwing the door open and going down the stars. But there was no one there, not even his men which he could’ve sworn he had heard just minutes ago. He didn’t like that.

He came down the stairs and stood in the center of the basement, where he had went on many rants before. Where he had taken his sisters life.

“Did you do it?” A feminine voice rang out, breaking the agonizing silence of the basement.

Kai turned around and saw Winter standing right behind him, his dark eyes widened and he took a step back. There she was again, her beautiful gray hair and those dark eyes just like his.

“Winter.” He exclaimed, extending his arms to wrap them around her. But his arms met nothing, only bumping into his torso, Winter had disappeared. Kai’s face was painting with grief and confusion, he turned around and saw his sister sitting on the ground.

“Did you do what needed to be done?” She asked, looking up at her brother with her natural stone cold face.

His heart dropped with that sentence that escaped Winter’s mouth, his prideful shoulders suddenly dropped and Kai fell to his knees before Winter.

“Yes, I did.” He replied, his tone low and full of hurt. His throat felt like he had swallowed glass, it felt raw from the overwhelming emotions swirling through his head right now. Kai tried desperately to keep tears from forming.

“Well, I just hope you know none of it was worth it Kai.” She said with her natural brutally cold tone, Kai’s face pained with disbelief. “All this time you spend, trying to win everyone’s trust, praise, and approval. None of it’s worth it in the end, everyone will betray you.”

This slightly angered Kai, he was taken back by this. Why would his sister say that to him? How could she not trust him? He had everything under control! How dare she. His face angered but before he could say or do anything, Winter’s figure had changed within the blink of an eye.

Just a second she was sitting here before him, but now she was a rotting corpse laying on the floor. Flys crawling along her pale cold skin, her flesh bubbling with maggots crawling and eating underneath her skin. The smell of horrible rot filled his nostrils, but it didn’t last long as he blinked again hoping the horrible scene would go away. It did. Winter was gone, and Kai sat alone in his basement.

Everything was silent. Kai’s mind was swirling with all kinds of thoughts, out of all the people he saw none of them dared to doubt him in that way. They only fueled his insane mindset, but Winter didn’t this time. She had shown him reality, but he refused to see it or listen.

His head fell into his hands, his fingers gripping harshly on his temples.

“I will prevail, I will not fail you Winter.” Kai said, poison dripping from his words he stood and left the basement with a new found anger fueling him.

Oh how wrong he was.

#ahs fandom #ahs cult #kai anderson #ahs fic #carnivore’s writing #Spotify

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snickerdoodie · 18 days

Text

“I can never let go”

Summary: Months had passed since that night, the night of reunion and hurt that neither of them could forget. They thought the worst had ticked by…they couldn’t have been more wrong.

Pairing: Castin Hammer x f!reader

A/N: I told ya’ll I’d post again 😋. Found this is my drafts and decided to finish and post it since you all seemed to like my last one. This one isn’t actually like a part two to my other Castin fic, but it’s another hurt-comfort situation because apparently I can’t write anything without hurting my own feelings?? Idk. But anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this one as much as you liked the other one! Enjoy!

Castin jolts awake with a choked gasp, immediately raising himself to sit up as his eyes dart around the moonlight illuminated bedroom. His vision blurry and disorienting as he tries to control his ragged breaths, soon failing as his mind thinks back to his very vivid feeling dream.

Baroness, his wife, struggling to hang onto the glimpse of life as blood squirts out from the sword impaled in her abdomen. Castins there, hands shaking as her desperately applies pressure to the wound, knowing damn well there’s nothing that can heal the every bleeding injury. He takes in shuddering breaths as he struggles to hold back his tears, the heaviness behind his eyes only increasing as he hears her own breathing become more and more shallow. As she takes in one last, staggering breath, she lets out a quiet “I love you.” His eyes widen as he lets out a wet “oh my god,” as he watches the life drain from his wife’s eyes. Looking up at the sky in hopes of a miracle, a sign that she’s living, but alas none come. He shuts his eyelids tightly, wanting to wake up, to feel her once beating heart against his own, to feel the known warmness of her now cold body. But he knows, goddess does he know the look of a dead, pleading soul by heart all too well.

Trying to decipher what’s real and what’s not, his desperate eyes soon make focus on a little bead of candle light coming from the library. As his mind switches to autopilot, his shaking hands roughly rip the sheets from his sweaty body, his stiff feet soon making contact with the cold floor, causing his body to involuntarily shiver at the feeling.

His body tries to stand in its own, not realizing its own weak state, legs and knees giving out as he grabs onto the bedside table to support himself, his quivering arms and hands knocking over glass and whatever else lays upon the table, his ringing ears not detecting the crashing and shattering of the bottles. Eyes shutting tensely when his vision blurs once again, noticing the slight sting in his palms from the shards that lay on the table and ground.

A room away the Baroness hears the commotion, looking up from her book at a source for the sound, finding nothing in her line of sight. Figuring it was her clumsy husband, she shuts her book quickly before walking over slowly to their shared bedroom, peaking over the corner, not expecting the right before her.

She sees her husband, hunched over their bedside table, shoulders shaking and head moving from side to side, his breathing erratic and quick . Taking notice in the broken bottles on the floor, she carefully starts making her way towards him, feet tapping on the floor quietly.

“Castin?” She whispers out, soon met with an uncomfortable silence. As if being pulled from a trance, her husbands head perks up, jerking to face her, but the glazed over look in his eyes makes her queasy.

“Baby,” he rasps out, voice nearly breaking. With two left feet, he tries to make his way over, as does she. But his knees soon buckle and his body falls forward, the baroness catching his heavy body in her much smaller arms. With a grunt, she tries as gently as she can to set them both on the floor, being held up by their knees. As she does, his arms frantically curl around her as if she’d disappear, face snuggling against her neck hurriedly.

“C-Castin? What-Are you alright what happened-“ Her thoughts were cut off by a small sob coming out of her husband’s mouth. It surprises her, to say the least. To hear her husband get choked up. His usual stoic and masculine self being broken down to nothing but one of a weeping child. She feels his tears soak into her sheer silk nightgown before she speaks up again, more gentle this time, much like a soothing mother.

“Castin? Oh my poor dear, what happened?” She coos, her soft hands pull his face away from her, feeling a sense of dread as she sees the absolutely heartbreaking look in his eyes. His eyes are wide, unfocused, fat tears threatening to fall down his roughed up face, eyebrows furrowed tightly as his lip quivers sadly. Surprisingly, he speaks up.

“I—I lost you..you…” he chokes up on his own words before continuing, “Oh god, you-you were bleeding ou-out e-everywhere…so..so much blood I-..” he tries to continue his thoughts but a fresh batch of tears stop him from doing so. Her hands come back up to wipe them away as they gush out. As he babbles out incoherently, she starts pressing soft kisses onto his tear soaked face as a way of grounding his scrambled mind. As if it was some kind of cure, his eyes flutter closed at the contact, piecing together the fragment of memories slowly.

Her delicate hands trace gentle circles along his rigid arms, feeling as they release the tension that lies beneath. Continuing her ministrations, she feels his body succumb to the tension and finally give out, almost collapsing on top of her if it wasn’t for her grabbing his shoulders to steady him, they both would have ended up with an even worse injury.

“Are you with me, my love? Can you feel me now?” She asks softly, one hand coming free to caress his chiseled face. It takes him a moment to compel himself to nod gently on her hold. Smiling in slight relief, her hand rests against his cheek as she watches his eyes open slowly. The moonlight catches them perfectly, the glazed over look her once held now replaced with one of a tired worker, droopy eyes meet her own sheepishly.

“My love?” He starts, voice rough and gravely, rightfully so. She nods, a sad smile coming across her features.

“Are you alright now? Whatever happened to cause that?” She questions, thumb stroking his cheek lovingly. His eyes trail down to the floor before taking a deep breath before starting.

“A..a nightmare, a very vivid one at that. I….i thought it was so real, you were…” he takes in a shuddering breath before continuing, “You were bleeding out, right in front of me. A sword straight to the stomach…I…I couldn’t stop it and…” his voice becomes watery along with his eyes once again as she shushes him gently, both hands now coming to caress his face lovingly.

“I’m right here, my love. Alive and very well, very healthy. Breathing and speaking if you wish. It was all just a dream, a figment of your imagination, none of it was real, alright?” He nods against her, hands coming to cup her own against his face, feeling the warmth of them, relishing in the fact that he can feel the pulse within. “You can feel it, no? My pulse, my heartbeat, my warmness, *thats* all real. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere any time soon.” He smiles, eyes still casted down to the soft fabric of which she wears, thanking the stars there’s no blood or weapon penetrating her porcelain skin.

“I feel you, baby, all of you.” He adds, taking in the small smile that makes its way across her face. With a loving glance, he slowly leans forward to interlock their lips, the weight of the world falling off his shoulders as he once again feels the heat radiating off her onto him.

Pulling away gently, his eyes meet her own, blinking sluggishly. His hands moving from hers to wrap around her midsection, face once again moving to her neck.

“I don’t think there’s anything in this world that can make me stop loving you, wife.”

“Likewise, husband.”

I love finding old writing from months ago that I just completely gave up on lmao. Idkw but the idea of Castin being like..so comfort starved triggers something in my brain. I love it when warrior men get all emotionalllll. Oh, this also don’t proofread either, I don’t think any of my stuff will actually be 💀. Am I gonna reuse the same Desmond image for every Castin fic??..perhaps

I hope you guys enjoyed this one too! I’ve been trying to post more but life is life and it literally stops for no one so I might just be scattering around random writes here and there lol. As always, comment about what you liked and what you didn’t like, or leave me a request in my inbox! I love ur guy’s ideas and seeing people request stuff makes me heart so happy ❤️❤️

(P.S. does anyone know how to make a master list?? I rlly wanna make one but I’ve got no clue how to work this😭. I’m doing all this on my phone so uh, help it wanted)

#baroness #castin hammer #desmond asmr #x reader #Castin #pt 2 #not really #comfort #female reader

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quarantineddreamer · 1 year

Note

Hi, idk if you're doing the ask game still but if you are, could we get rebelcaptain for number eight?

Hi, anon, thank you so much for the ask 💜 Confession? I read the prompt wrong a bit wrong and got through this whole thing before realizing it was things you said when you were crying 😬 but I'm going to argue that in this they both cry at points, so I hope you'll forgive me my error (and I really hope you like it!!)

things you said when you were crying

It took all of Cassian’s concentration to command his left foot forward, hands gripping the bars on either side of him so hard it hurt–though not nearly as badly as the rest of him.

Every muscle in his body was on fire, every bone sharply aching.

Not even ten minutes into today’s session of physical therapy and he was drenched in sweat, hair plastered to his forehead, shirt stuck to his chest, the salty taste of it on his lips, stinging his eyes. While he glared down at his feet, a large bead of it–containing all the grace of a raindrop and none of the beauty–dragged down his nose and fell to the floor.

The next step hurt just as bad as the last, and the one after that took twice as long and left him trembling, teeth practically rattling from the effort.

But he was determined, eager to heal. The Rebellion needed him. Already he felt like he’d been away for too long. Months spent in and out of surgery, in and out of consciousness, he refused to let any more time go to waste.

Cassian squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, fighting a wave of exhaustion, pain, and nausea that threatened to drown him; they were sensations he had grappled with more times than not since Scarif, and he had quickly learned that each was tortuous in their one unique way.

“Take a break if you need to, Captain,” the medic told him. “You have a long journey ahead, so pace yourself.”

Screw that. He opened his eyes again and, biting back a shout, forced his foot forward again.

But the toe of his shoe slid in a pool of sweat–all of his own making–sending his leg sliding out from under him. He tried to catch himself with his arms–to brace his weight on the bars framing either side of him–but his palms were too slick, making his grip precarious, and he crashed to the floor, the intense agony of his injuries hitting him all over again.

“FUCK!” he shouted, because what else was there to say when you could remember taking down stormtroopers without so much as a blink and now a single step had turned you into a humiliated tangle of limbs, sprawled across the ground.

Fighting for breath, he used what little energy he had remaining to reach up to the bar above his head and pull himself upright, clumsily positioning his back against the wall.

But following that act, he had nothing left with which to defend himself against the frustration, the hurt, the fear that fell upon him, predators on wounded prey–devouring, consuming–until he’d forgotten himself entirely and all he knew was the dark wash of anguish tearing him to shreds from the inside out.

“Cassian, Cassian.” A hand caught his own midair, preventing him from smashing the floor with his fist again.

The touch grounded him, bringing reality surging back to his frayed mind–he found himself wishing it had left him alone.

No…not now. He didn’t want her to see him like this. Couldn’t bear the look of disappointment he expected to find on her face. “Jyn…” He caught her knees on the floor beside him out of the corner of his vision, made himself look up at her, her image swimming before him.

“Let me–”

“What the hell are you doing here?” He tore his arm free from her hand.

“I came to check on you, I wanted to–”

Cassian did all he could to turn away from her. “Don’t,” he said sharply, loathing the tears that were cutting lines down his cheeks.

Before Scarif he had been better than this at controlling his emotions, hiding them from others, but the regiment of medications he was on created a fog so thick he discovered his own thoughts betraying him all the time. If it wasn’t his short-term memory in shambles, it was his temper–forcing everything to be felt with a heightened sensitivity. The perfect storm of conditions under which he was dealing with perhaps the greatest challenge of his life.

It was hell.

“Will you please look at me?”

“Leave, Jyn. You don’t have to be here, this isn’t your problem. Leave.” His head fell back against the wall and he watched as Jyn’s face darkened, her fingers curling into tight fists where they rested over her thighs.

“Is that what you really want?” she asked quietly, fixing him with a hard stare.

No… A strand of her dark hair was hanging across her face and he wanted to push it back–maybe would have if he’d possessed the strength to do so. Force, her eyes were beautiful.

He was on the floor crying from pain and exhaustion; what must she think of him? Weak, pathetic.Yes, yes I want you to leave…

But she wasn’t looking at him like that, no, he wasn’t quite sure what her expression was saying, but it wasn’t that. I don’t know…

“What if I told you I’m not going anywhere?” Jyn murmured, reaching a hand tentatively towards his face, wiping a tear from his cheek with surprising gentleness. She caught his eyes again, still waiting to see if he would offer a reply.

“I’d say it’s just like you not to listen,” he finally sighed.

“It does sound like me doesn’t it?” she teased, lips briefly twitching upward. But her voice was serious, expression intent, when she said, “Cassian, why are you asking me to leave?”

I don’t deserve this… I don’t deserve you… At his best he’d been a mess–so used to playing whatever part the Rebellion needed that he’d half-forgotten himself–what could he possibly offer her or anyone else now? It wasn’t clear yet if he’d ever be able to walk well again, much less run or fight. He would only slow her down, burden her–and Jyn had carried enough in her life as it was without adding his weight to the equation.

But Cassian didn’t know how to put those thoughts into words–or maybe it was that his voice was betraying him as much as he felt his body was–so he just shook his head, looked across the room to where the medic was standing in the distance, awkwardly trying their best not to encroach despite the need to hover.

“I’ve pushed people away before,” Jyn said softly, pulling his gaze back to her face. “Usually when I needed them most… I did it before they could do it to me, because I thought that’s how it always went, that there was no other way that life could go.” Her hand returned to the side of his face, thumb gently brushing over his cheek. “But it’s not like that with you… I said horrible things to you on Eaudu, but afterwards, when I needed you, there you were.”

“This isn’t like that,” Cassian murmured.

“Isn’t it?”

“You can’t help me with this, I might not get better. And then what?” his voice broke on the question, the first time he’d dared to voice the possibility aloud. If he considered the notion for too long he thought it might take life, form the shape of a black hole, a yawning void that would threaten to swallow him alive. Where would I go? What would I do? What now?

Jyn blinked at him. “You think that’s a reason for me to abandon you?”

“I’m not the person I was–I might never be again.”

“Neither am I,” she replied fiercely. “Neither is Chirrut or Baze or Bodhi–any of us. How can we be? After everything we went through? And besides, it’s not the first time any of us have changed–I know you know that. ” He opened his mouth to speak but she held up her hand. “No, listen. I know you’re going to say it’s not the same, and you’re right, it’s not. This is a big change, a hard change. None of it was your choice, and I can’t even begin to understand what you’re going through.

“But if you’re trying to tell me that your ability to ‘get better’ is what determines your worthiness? I’m going to…” she took a deep breath, “to have to fight very hard not to strangle you, because whether or not you know this right now, you're worthy no matter what happens next.

“However you have to show up each day, however you’re feeling, the good, the bad, I’m with you. Same as…same as I know you’d be for me.” She cleared her throat, blinked back a watery shine that had fallen over her eyes. “Okay?”

He leaned his head into her palm. “Okay,” he breathed, because even though he knew he might not believe it tomorrow, he believed it for the moment–and he had a feeling if and when he changed his mind, Jyn would do all she could to bring that belief back.

She wiped her tears from her eyes and offered her hands to him, “Can I help you?”

It still wasn’t easy. He still felt some embarrassment, he still held anger and frustration for it all. He still hurt…

But together, they slowly rose to their feet.

#rebelcaptain #rebelcaptain fanfic #b writes #ask b anything #jyn x cassian #this one is long enough im just tagging it as a fic buuut i did write in a drabble mindset #i hope i did this alright tried to draw from my own experience but i know it is a tricky subject #and one in which perspectives and experiences are almost all unique to individuals #okay here goes nothing

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herri-writes · 2 years

Text

In This Eternity

Mika Kagehira x Reader (!!)

Note: Pls this idea stayed in my brain occasionally. (Long ass writer's note and fic incoming) Idk but i put some slight spoilers from Sprout * Waning Hermitage. I cannot unthink of how beautiful this is-- INCLUDING THE CARD ARTS I AM IN LOVE. RABU~I It's been a while since I last wrote a songfic. Never thought I'll be able to write one using an enstars song— especially Acanthe. I am bawling with crocodile tears here. Not to mention, the whole song is the whole goddamn base of this fic. It's an absolute mess because of my writer's block but Mika— MIKA— made me continue to write this. I used the english translation from the wiki and being creative by using it to give meaning to the fic. I will cry once the trans at en live will show up and not accept it. Warning: Messy writing. I'm fighting writer's block like how I fought my life.

It was sundown at Sky Garden. You are taking a small breather because of certain twins who saw you working hard as usual but caught you slowly blinking the minute away. Somehow, they brought you all the way here to Sky Garden and left you out there, all alone because of the Deputy Director summoned them for work reasons. You sighed. They were right. You are overworking yourself to the bone again. You were completely glad that someone who studied in the same Alma mater was there to help you. You remembered Valkyrie's previous live. Your words got caught in your throat the moment they performed. Of course, it was different from their rehearsals but the actual performance blew you away— like a kiss that will inspire your heart in this eternity. The song is so heart wrenching and yet, it touched you and held you, like these arms that will embrace you tightly in this eternity. And yet, their art is like a museum, their hermitage. A doll, who was able to dance freely with no strings attached, blew your heart and kissed you, in this eternity— You shook your head when your mind wandered and saw a pair of heterochromic eyes in your vision. You slapped your cheeks to remove those eyes in your mind. Sure, he was once a doll but he was given life by his own creator. He was more human in his performance, not like a marionette who was lifeless and controlled. It was such a sight to see that he was accepted as an artist by his own master, who was now his equal. Their past performances are artistic and yet your gaze remained to him, who was once a marionette at his own movements, was now a human. And that marionette, is Mika Kagehira, the novice artist. You spent days wondering how were you able to take a liking at this young artist, who graduated from a doll to his master's equal. It was always like this since the day your eyes stared at his heterochromic ones. Amber and sapphire gemstones sparkling beautifully under the ever-changing sky. Whether it's night or day, its always a wonderful sight for you to look upon. You sighed once again. You always knew that ever since the day you began to produce for Valkyrie. As someone who is always busy like Anzu back in the previous year as a producer in the Idol Course, you were able to understand what Valkyrie is like— from the past to the present. You stood up and began to dance, just like how Mika had done at Hermitage. You were amazed on how he interpreted the way on how the doll came to life. You remembered how Mika told you once that he was possessed by the doll. You couldn't believe that it actually happened and yet, it made you think that it was how Mika was able to adapt to his former self as a member of ex-Valkyrie and act the way he is as a member of Valkyrie in the present in his dance. While being perished in this longing and illusion You placed your hands on your chest and turned, as if your embracing the loneliness in your heart and hummed. While anticipating this sleeping Hermitage Graceful and beautiful, yet tragic and heart wrenching as it ended with a happy ending. That's how you describe Acanthe. Valkyrie's Acanthe. Someday, your heart will blow and you'll kiss me In this eternity

"Ngh... Sis Mado! Where are ya?" A voice called out from behind the building. "Sis Mado— Hm?" He stopped from the corner of the building and listened closely. His heterochromic eyes widen as he saw you singing and dancing Acanthe. Holding on to these rusted, broken, and lonely feelings Getting close to this person in Hermitage His jaw dropped. He rubbed his eyes and thought if his eyes are creating illusions. 'Am I seein' things or 's it (Name) dancin' to ma part of the song?' He shook his head and look around to see if the little doll is within the vicinity. To his surprise, she was sitting on one of the benches near you. 'Good. She's here.' He sighed in relief. 'But how did Sis Mado got here? Someone must've took her. Was it (Name)?' He shook his head at his own question. 'No, t'was nearly impossible for (Name) to bring Sis Mado here...' "Someday, these arms will embrace me tightly..." He heard you all too well. "In this eternity..." His heart softened as you hit the notes all too perfectly that he sang along. He woke up from his short reverie when he heard her voice. "My, (Name), your voice sounded so lovely. It was pleasant to the ears, just like what Mika told me before." Madmoiselle commented at the performance you just did. Well, Mika couldn't lie when he heard you sang once. He was stunned when he first heard you sing back then when he waited for you in Valkyrie's practice room. He always saw you always talk and work that he began to wonder if you can sing or dance. And this was the second time he saw you did both. "Thank you very much—" You paused for a moment. That familiar voice made you turn around and you couldn't believe your eyes. Your eyes look down to the bench and see the petite little doll on it in a blue dress, pairing it with a blue ribbon tied on its signature blonde curly hair. "Ma-Madmoiselle?! How did you get here? Since when did you get here?" The doll chuckled, "I asked for a little help from someone and I was already here when you started singing." You walked closer to the doll and lowered yourself to her level. You curiously asked her, "A little help...?" You tilted your head a little. She answered, "Shu once heard you sang so he wanted me to see you and hear you sing." "He perhaps brought you here to know that I'm bad at singing." "Of course not. He was amazed that he heard you sang. Not to mention, your actions, pose, everything, is all a work of art, he said." You blushed at Madmoiselle's words. You felt like you're crazy because you're talking to a doll that Valkyrie rubbed a lot on you. It became a thing since last year, of course. You made an eye contact to the doll and exhaled in defeat. You were pretty sure that all of this is a coincidence— starting from the moment the Aoi twins took you out here for a break and Shu bringing Madmoiselle here and left her on the bench near you to hear you sing. What's next? Mika hiding from me behind the trees or behind the building? Your eyes widen at the thought. You thought if someone from Valkyrie is here that you stood up and sat beside Madmoiselle. "(Name), I may be a doll but I can tell you anything that you need to know." Madmoiselle said and you nodded. "What did Mika say about me?" You asked her and she answered, "Mika always describe you as hardworking producer. Sometimes he thought if you made a competition with Anzu here. He often told me that you're creative when he saw you that you can design clothes so well. He thought if he could bring your designs to Shu but you always hid your works in your bag the moment he saw you draw your sketches." "I—" You were absolutely stunned. 'Sis Mado?!' Mika froze on his spot and covered his mouth to prevent any noises to come out of him. He doesn't want his cover to be blown and get caught by you and Madmoiselle. He didn't expect that she'll tell the things that Mika told her and pass it on to you. "Mika may be a curious one and all but he has a lot to learn for himself. He never wanted to depend on Shu and learned to become independent for himself." The doll continued. Ah, right. He was like that when he thought of designing an exclusive outfit form himself when it was his turn to be given one. You smiled at his reactions when you saw him at the clothing gallery to sketch his designs. "I thought so, too." Mika heard everything and nearly fainted at your response. "Sis Mado... Ya don't even need to say anythin'..." You exhaled and looked at the doll and asked, "Madmoiselle, would you mind if I continue to sing. I felt comfortable singing in front of someone now." 'Or something...' The doll answered, "Of course." You cleared your throat and continued to sing. Reminiscent of this lingering fragrance of warmth You stood up from the bench and continued to dance. This time, it was Shu's part of the performance. Mika's eyes opened wide in surprise. 'She knew Teach's part?! Amazing...!' Once upon a time, this love was decorated with scars And they are the proof that we have transcended time itself "I shall never forget you even if you disappear..." Mika was so close on revealing himself from hiding and singing alongside you. He resisted but gave up as he snapped out of his thoughts to hide and revealed himself. Luckily, your back is facing the bench where Mika is so he took it as his chance to skip his way closer to you. Mika stepped closer towards you and danced alongside you. You were so immersed to the song that you didn't notice he was there just now. The singing voice is about to fade away Mika appreciated your voice ever since the day he heard you sing, the day he saw you danced, and the day he saw you create art. It was completely rare for someone like you who has hidden talent, could attract a young artist like him. Even if many times these feelings get lost He was glad that he performed alongside you, even if you didn't notice that he was here just now. Give in this spring, we shall repeat this love again You could feel the song as if it embraced you. You were right, it embraced you, like a person in a hermitage. It's as if the song carried your soul away and made you less distracted to your surroundings as if you didn't care who or what was around you. "With a kiss that will inspire your heart..." He held out his hand, as if to reach you. He smiled as you did the same. Your eyes widen when you took a glance beside you. His amber and lapis-like eyes glanced back in a moment to your own. They were beautiful, indeed. Your mind began to panic as he looked at you with such loving gaze with a genuine smile. "...in this eternity..." Your voice was caught in your throat that you heard him sing. You weren't dreaming. This is not a hallucination after an adrenaline rush, not an hallucination from overworking, and not an illusion or not a see-through item like glass. 'Mika?! The Mika Kagehira?! Of Valkyrie?! Oh, God... He's really here?!' You mentally panicked that you froze on the spot, mouth agape, and eyes open wide. "Hm? (Name)? Are ya alright?" Mika tilted his head in confusion. He checked to see if you're alright by poking your cheek and blood rushed up to your cheeks, giving out a pure blush, which was either out of pure embarrassment that someone saw you dance and heard you sing or you being flustered that the young idol you admire from afar is here and witnessed almost everything. Mika stepped back, surprised on what he saw. 'Move, you dummy! You always met him at Yumenosaki! Act normally!' You internally screamed to yourself but you couldn't move. "Ngh... Earth to (Name)? Ya okay?" Mika waved his hand in front of your eyes and looked closer. "She looks like a doll right now..." Mika said his thought out loud. He saw you slowly blink, once then quick at the second and twice and you're awake. "Good evening, Kagehira..." You uttered. You saw him staring into your eyes and you stared back as he greeted you back. "Good evenin', (Name)." Your eyes couldn't leave this staring contest that you were so sure that moment you were finally awake from the unknown reverie you felt after you felt your heart skipped a beat. You were finally back to your sensed that you stood up properly after the sudden awkward tension you felt between you two. You cleared your throat and asked him, "What brings you here at this time of hour?" "Ah, right. Teach asked me to look for Sis Mado because he might've misplaced her somewhere." Mika explained everything what happened and you nodded. He turn around to see Madmoiselle sitting on the bench and said, "Well, it seems I found her so I'll bring her back to Starmony Dorm." You look to where Madmoiselle is as Mika took her and gently carried her in his arm. "It's nice spending time with you even if it's a little, (Name)." She said sadly. "Likewise, Madmoiselle." You sadly replied. You look up to face Mika and excused yourself to leave since it was getting dark and you have to return back to the building. As Mika saw your figure disappearing into the distance, he held out his hand to reach you but failed when you're too far away from him. His smiling expression faltered into a gloomy one. Madmoiselle noticed this and decided to tell him everything what had happened today to Shu. Little the three of you know that someone was watching from the distance and witness everything that is being unfolded. As if the curtain had closed a moment ago, they had left the vicinity and returned to the dorm without making any noise or being seen by anyone close by.

The next day, you're in ES's clothing room and you're spending the day planning for the add-ons for the design for the next exclusive outfit while listening to Acanthe for the nth time of the day on repeat. You were relieved that no one here is interrupting you. You look around to see if anyone else is in the room and you sighed in relief. Satisfied and undisturbed, you began to hum the song while the melody is playing at your earphones. You forgot that the door is half-open that you saw a mop of dark green hair entering the room the moment you glanced. You ignored it and continued to hum. "Someday, your heart will blow and you will kiss me..." You were drowned in thoughts as the melody continued to clear your mind that you didn't notice someone was sitting on the chair near you. You look up to see who it was and the music stopped as you remove your earphones. It's as if he knew where you stopped singing, he continued it for you. "...in this eternity..." He looked at you the same way he looked at you last night in Sky Garden. He never failed to make your heart flutter once again with that innocent, child-like smile, those heterochromic eyes that somehow represents day and night, that dark green hair that you once saw it as black from afar but it revealed as a dark, burnt, emerald when close. "(Name), yer starin' again. 'S there somethin' in my face?" His words make you awake from your trance. You realized the close proximity you two had and the gentle warmth you felt on your forehead. It's so warm that you felt like sleeping and leaning on his touch. 'Was he always here whenever I sing that song...?' "I heard from Naru that yer overworkin' to the bone again. Ya really need to rest. Yer a human ya know?" Mika said with concern. He was stunned when he felt you leaning on to his hand that was on your forehead and fall forwards to the table. Luckily, he stopped you from falling to not to hit your head on the hard table. What's worse for you is that there are pens and pencils on it. His eyes laid down on your sketchpad but shook his head. '(Name's) priority comes first. Teach will be mad if he saw them like this again. Sis Mado will be worried...' "Ngh..." He groaned out of fear and worry. He carried you in his arms and headed towards the couch and placed you there, gently and carefully. Mika worried looked at you when he remembered himself, his past self and that made him worry even more. "Yer better rest (Name)." He quietly whispered, a volume that only he and you could hear. "Yer a producer. Everyone's rooting for ya. Ya don't need to overwork yerself." He inched closer to see if you're fully rested and you were. He stayed there and watched you sleep peacefully. He wants to whisper to you a lot of things but he couldn't say it. He loves you but he couldn't say it. It pained him and he knew that all too well. He knows that his emotions control him but couldn't do so anymore because of his days as a doll. Now that he is not, he still couldn't control it even it was an accident. Then, he gave up. "(Name)..." He whispered your name. "What if I tell ya that I like ya...?" He shook his head once again. He knew all too well that you're sound asleep and knows that you couldn't hear him. He ate a candy until he felt himself drifting off to sleep. Wave of exhaustion washed over him these past days. He is working hard for Valkyrie, of course. Your eyes fluttered open as you let out a low hum and try to remember where you were right now. The moment you saw his face right in front of you, you blinked once, and twice. Alarmed at the proximity between you and him, you yelped, which made the male jolt up from his sleep and fall back to the floor and hurt his back. "My apologies, Kagehira. Are you alright?" You immediately rise up and rushed to the male who was on the floor. You checked if he was hurt elsewhere until you heard him chuckle. You saw him smile as he scratched his cheek. "I'm fine. Nothin' to worry." You exhaled in relief. "Thank goodness..." You began to wonder why is he here and not with Shu and Madmoiselle. You checked the time at the clock facepalmed yourself. They left Japan minutes ago. "Right... Teach told me to check on ya once I return to ES after he left for his flight to France." Mika look away with a faint blush shown on his face. "The moment I got here, ya spaced out and sing the same song from last night. Ya really liked it, don't ya?" You nodded at his question. The same awkward tension you felt before is back again. You stood up and let out your hand. He accepted it and helped him to stand up. As he was finally standing on his own two feet, you told him to sit down and you apologized for scaring him. "Hm? It's okay. I was the one who supposed to be apologizin' here..." He said as he scratched the back of his neck. You leaned back to the couch and exhaled. You were exhausted and barely had enough rest these past few days. The only time you could relax is to be alone and to sing your heart out. Mika heard your sigh looked at you. He remembered something to make you sleep, as what Madmoiselle, Ritsu, and Arashi had told him before. "Don't tell me ya can't sleep well, (Name)?" Mika asked and you nodded. "Would ya mind if I sing for ya?" "I wouldn't mind..." Your words ended with a small yawn. He smiled and began to hum. 'Ah, it's the same song again...' You thought and you felt him pulling closer to you gently. He guided your head to lean on his shoulder and rubbed your arm with his hand as he lulled you to sleep. His voice may be melancholic, but it was gentle as light, giving its way in the dark. You were so sure that you heard someone whispering to you when you fell asleep a moment ago. You disregarded it and you muttered it out, as if to respond to that mystery person's question. "What if... I tell you that... I like Kagehira...?" Mika stopped his humming as he heard you said those words. It was too coherent that it caught his attention. He blinked twice. He was so sure he heard his name. He held you tight, but not too tight that will make you awake. Pink covered his cheeks and red began to spread all over. He covered his mouth to hide that goofy smile on his face. It was completely written as "(Name) like me? Did I heard that right?"

He began to remember your previous conversation with Madmoiselle back at Yumenosaki, when you visited the Handicrafts Club room. "He was able to express other human emotions that a doll couldn't have. One time, he was thankful that he was able to feel an another human emotion, other than pain, guilt, anger, and joy, and it's all because of you." Madmoiselle told you as you placed the decorations on the table. "Because of me? How?" You tilted your head as you asked her. "Because you are more human than you think." She answered. "Well, I am indeed a human." You replied. "I'm not a human if I don't feel any emotion." "That's what Tsumugi told Mika back then." She giggled and you nervously chuckled. 'What kind of doll is she...?' You sat down on one of the chairs near Madmoiselle and sighed. "Says the one who has a human knowledge..." Mika didn't mean to eavesdrop on you and Madmoiselle. He overheard her saying his name that he leaned closer to the door and listened closely. "Say, (Name), do you have hidden feelings towards Mika?" Mika nearly slammed the door open but abstained himself from doing so. "N-No...? Why?" You hesitantly answered. "Don't say that. I know you have that. You always look at him differently from others when you're doing your work as a producer here in Yumenosaki." She said. Mika internally panicked and leaned on the wall. 'I did tell her that...!' He heard you sigh. "Alright. You got me. I did have feelings towards him. I like Mika." You paused for a moment and remembered a rule that existed in the idol industry. "But idols and producers can't be together. It'll be better if I disregard these feelings and move on." You're right, even Mika just remembered that rule. "You can tell him that you do like him as (Name), not the you as a producer." Madmoiselle told you and you felt like falling from a cliff or burying yourself alive six feet under the ground. "It's unhealthy for someone to hide their own personal feelings and prevent it from overflowing— unless if they knew how to control it or preventing it from doing so. But in your case, you couldn't." You began to sulk because a doll told you that. A doll, a doll that has unknown human knowledge and it seemed like it was based on written literature that can be found anywhere in the world, a doll that was given great love and care, and a doll that was owned by an artist named Shu Itsuki. You sighed in defeat. Mika on the other hand, sunk down to his knees and felt like screaming his heart out. That was the day that he knew you felt the same. His mind wandered around and think. A questioned popped up in his mind and it repeated like a broken recorder. "When will be the time that (Name) will tell her feelings to me? When will be the time that I'll be able to confess to her?" His smile faltered. He knew that it was nearly possible. He did overheard you saying that you like him. He wanted you to say that in front of him soon. But he know all too well that you kept holding on to these rusted, broken, and lonely feelings you once called. He reached out to you, and came closer to you, the person in Hermitage. One day, if there is a time that someone will embrace you tightly in this eternity, it will come true. Right now, it already did. He will wait for you to speak out. He will wait for you to love him back. He will wait and always will.

It feels like years when it was actually weeks when he last communicated with you. You ignored him these past weeks and it pains him. Were you tired of spending time with him? Talking to him? Sharing your creative thoughts to him? Or was it something else? Then he finally knew why, a person like you, whose love was decorated with scars, became the proof that you've transcended time itself. You've fought and withstood everything that you forgot to love once again. He knew that you forgot to care yourself that you've became weaker than you always were. You prevent your feelings to overflow out of you and you gave up on everything. You avoided him because of these lingering feelings whenever he's near. You overworked yourself to the bone until you collapsed. Mika waited for you to talk to him again but his patience snapped like a thread when he heard that you're in the infirmary from Arashi. He rushed to the infirmary and to see if you're alright. He saw you, alright, sleeping peacefully but wasn't relieved when he saw your current physical condition. Your eyes that was full of life, turned dull and lifeless. He knows it even if it's closed. Your arms that carried anything with such strength, became thin. He was so scared to hold you that you might break. And your skin that was smooth and fair, became pale and dry. He still have time and he knows it. He sat on the chair beside the table and waited for you to wake up. Tears began to fall from his beautiful, azure and amber eyes. He weeped. He held your hand and gently squeezed it. You are so thin, thinner than you usually were that he was scared that you might break, like a porcelain doll. You indeed look like one but you seemed like you're on the verge of breaking. Mika waited and waited for you to wake up. Even on the middle of his work, all he could think of is you. Whenever Shu called him and Mika could only let out a small noise of guilt, Madmoiselle reassured him that you'll be alright once you wake up. He couldn't eat nor sleep well. Arashi and Ritsu comforted him. Including the rest of the Pretty 5. He is so worried that he was too close on ending up on the same condition as you and luckily, they prevented him from doing so. They help him stood strong for you and he wanted to do that to you the same. Days later, you woke up from your long rest. Your eyes opened to see the all-familiar white ceiling above you. Your hand feels limp yet the touch is sensitive from the warmth enveloped on it. You turned your head to see Mika sleeping at the bedside, holding your hand, as if not to let you go while waiting for you to wake up. You tried to call his name but your throat feels dry, like the drought in summer. You saw him waking up from his slumber and looked at you as he rubbed his eyes to stay awake. He pounced on you and hugged you firmly yet gently, not too tight and not too loose. "Yer back! I thought ya died..." He said as he began to sob. You pat his back for reassurance. He let you go and faced you. "Ya slept for four days! Everyone's worried about ya!" "..rry..." You tried to voice out but your dry throat won't let you do so. "You don't hafta apologize! It's not yer fault why yer like this!" "...t is..." You spoke out and tried to give moisture to your dry throat with your saliva. "Mi...ka... I—" "Not now, (Name). Ya hafta rest more." He cut you off as he gave you a glass of water. You weakly took it from his hand and drink it slowly. "I'm... sorry... I shouldn't—" "(Name), please..." Mika begged you to stay in the bed. "Mika, please, listen to me." "Talk to me after ya recovered. That can wait." He said as he assisted you to lie down on the bed. You held his hand to make him stay. You saw his eyes. He seemed hurt. You did as he said and kept your mouth shut but you didn't let go of his hand. You tried to tell him to stay but the other half of you wanted to tell him to go. So why? Why didn't you let him go? Silence remained in the infirmary. Mika stayed like what you told him to. Everything is too heavy for you that tears fell from your eyes. You couldn't let out the cry from the weight you've bear. It was too heavy that it's hard for you to let it all out. It was a silent one, indeed. Mika saw the constant flow of tears coming out of your eyes and comforted you. You immediately hugged him and constantly apologized to him. He was startled at your sudden actions to him. He became baffled on why you apologized to him. He didn't make a mistake to you or did any. "It's alright, (Name). Let it out." Mika whispered as he returned the hug you gave him. Soft sniffles and hics resonated in the infirmary. You wished that if only you could apologize to him properly and not like this someday soon.

Mika constantly visit you after his work. He took care of you even Anzu was there to bring you back to shape. From breaks to lunch and after work hours, he always visit you as you recover. Anzu scolded you for not taking care of yourself when she even did the same to herself. But in your case, it was worse than hers. Days passed and you recovered. You tried to return back to your work but Mika and Arashi stopped you from doing so. Even most of the units told you to rest just because you've recovered. Remembering that you're still a student, you ignored them and remained busy at your school works, which you were caught by a fellow producer of yours. That left no other choice for you but to rest and do nothing except for participating in classes, much to your chagrin. You sighed as you sat under the tree at the rooftop of the school building, where you could finally have peace. No Anzu stopping you from doing your producer work, no Ritsu tackling you down to the ground to make you sleep with him, and no Yuzuru to bring you to the student council office to have you drink tea with Tori and Mao. As the day was finally coming close to its end, you stayed there before leaving the campus to work at Ensemble Square. You lied down on the bench and felt the afternoon sun shining down on you. It was warm and gentle, just like how he held you back then. Your eyes shot wide open when you realized that almost everything reminded you of him. It annoys you almost every time. (W/N: ngl this happened to me all the time and I got sick of it.) You shook your head to remove the thoughts in your mind and rest. You felt peaceful once again and relaxed the you leaned sideways to see the late afternoon sky, shading from violet to orange. Just as you were about to close your eyes, a figure blocked the view and your scrunched your brows and nose up in annoyance. "I found ya." Mika sat down to your level and tilted his head to see you properly. That look of annoyance on your face just now disappeared and turned into a calm expression. How could you be mad when it's someone like Mika? "Ya seemed like yer like a cat who's about to kill someone? Ya okay?" Mika asked you out of curiosity? You questioned back, "Do I seem like one?" He nodded and grinned, "A cute one at that." You turned your body, making your back face Mika. You didn't want him to see that blush growing red on your cheeks. "Er, did I offend ya? Sorry..." He apologized and scratched his cheek. You immediately sit up and reassured him that you're not. The panicked look on his face turned into a relieved one. Cats are indeed cute, aren't they? You sighed. You cupped his cheek with your hand and rubbed your thumb. You felt him leaning to your touch and slyly grinned. You felt your heart squeeze like how one would squeeze a lemon by hand. Your other hand went to his hair and petted his head. You felt him leaning closer and rested his head on your lap. A blush began to spread across your cheeks until it covered your whole face. "(Name)... do ya like someone...?" Your flustered self didn't hear that question that you subconsciously answered him yes. "Really? Who is it?" You felt your heart stop at his question that you tried to process everything. "Can you repeat your question, Kagehira?" You wanted to hear his question once again to make sure you're not hearing anything wrong. "I asked ya if ya liked someone. You said yes and I'm asking ya who." He look up to see your face and stared into your eyes. You look back and said, "If I tell you who, would you still sing with me again?" He nodded at your question. Your spirit waved the white flag and ignore what will happen to you if you sold your soul to a demon. Mika sat down beside you and waited for you to say who. You were hesitant at first but you gave up and confessed, "It's you... Kagehira." Mika blinked once, then twice and brazenly replied, "I thought ya hated me that yer always away from me these past days." You look away and lost eye contact with him and admitted everything to him. "The reason why I took distance away from you and increase my workload more is because I wanted to ignore my feelings towards you. Producers and idols can't be in a relationship, Kagehira. That's why I created distance away from you. I'm sorry." Mika hugged you tight. "No wonder... Now I know why ya kept apologizing to me at the infirmary back then." He patted your back and you felt your tears coming out of your eyes. It hurts to cry but another wave of tears won't hurt, right? That's it. You're now waiting for him to leave you after this. "To be honest, I felt the same so don't feel bad okay?" Mika whispered to your ear as you felt more tears flowing out from the corners of your eyes. A moment ago, it was sadness but now it was full of pure joy. You didn't expect him to feel the same as you do. You wiped your tears and you felt Mika making you lean on to him. Now that you admitted it, you told him, "You know... it's better if we remain as friends. I'm not ready to be in a relationship with you, Kagehira." "It's fine, (Name). I can wait for ya to tell me if yer ready to date me." You smiled at his response and laid your head on his shoulder. It was reciprocated, indeed. But no one knows if it will last long. You thought that it won't stay long after you confessed to him. There will be a time that you'll disappear in this world and never return and leave him behind. But there was one thing that you didn't know and that is he will love you like a warmth in spring and shall never forget you even if you disappear. Even if there's no end to the seasons that come and go, he will be there to accompany you and will always be with you. Even without a word coming out of you, he knows that there is a soul inside. With the tears you both had shed, he'll gently tie these and use them to tell a story. The story you shared and created with him in this sleeping Hermitage, where you were being perished in this longing and illusion, he inched closer and reached you while you're holding on to these rusted, broken, and lonely feelings. Your wish when someday that he, will blow your heart and kiss you, embrace you tightly, and with a kiss that will inspire your heart in this eternity finally came true.

W/N:

Don't judge me. I'm fighting writer's block like how my life depends on it. *Proceeds to continue my speech and draft for the clubworks* Anyways, before I could disappear again, I made two pics for the fic like

He's so beautiful and you cannot argue with me.

I even have to ask my ValkyrieP (+EdenP and Double FaceP) friends at discord to pick a pic and somehow, it ended up as a "SwitchP fighting for their life from ValkyrieP's at their natural habitat with their very own companions" sumthn like that.

Anyways, bye.

#written by herri #ensemble stars #ensemble stars x reader #mika kagehira #mika kagehira x reader #precious scrunkly made me write for him even on the misdt of my writer's block #midst #goddamnit #i didn't expect for this to be freaking long omg #enstars #enstars x reader

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pixelmensupremacy · 1 year

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Omg! You write for Markus? I wanna see what you can do with how Markus saves his beloved android s/o from Zlatko who got kidnapped because they were a unique RK model and was easily fooled. I've been having this idea in my head for weeks but idk how to write

A/N: Dear, Nonny, I'm so so so sorry for taking astronomically long to write this. I had quite a fall out of the dbh fandom, though I'm slowly coming back and working on the other dbh requests.

Word count: 0.7k

WARNINGS: body horror, hurt and comfort, body horror, hinting at inhumane practices (cause that bastard Zlatko)

Good was all (Y/N) ever strived to do even if sometimes it meant they would have to suffer; maybe that flaw of theirs is what brought them close to the android’s leader. Or rather it was just a flaw of their prototype model that got them in trouble like it always has; ironic as it was their whole existence revolved around humanity and empathy, yet they never got to experience such empathy themselves. That was until in their darkest moment- the one in which they lost everything, despite giving it their all- (Y/N) came across the community of Jericho, their new family.

Now darkness engulfed their field of vision much like in that one fateful night; clicking sound echoed across the space along with a piercing static sound that only enhanced their distress. System errors clouded their CPU, notifying them of damaged and even missing bio components; agony was all they felt as they contemplated the events that got them to this very situation. Their trust was once again broken and now (Y/N) wasn’t lucky enough to get away with just the bitter taste of betray; it pained them deeply, despite knowing deep down they couldn’t trust anybody- maybe in that case not even themselves. Still there was person that came to mind when the single flicker of hope left resurfaced akin to the light at the end of the tunnel; Markus, the one who opened their eyes, had been there for them through thick and thin. To them, he was like an angel that always supported not only them but also his community, which only made them respect him more.

A dreamy exhale rolled down their lips at the thought of him; (Y/N) wondered if his ambitious plans were already playing out, though yet another thought occurred to them, one that even more overambitious than a successful android revolution- salvation. Even though their situation was beyond hopeless, they still had a sliver of faith within them that things will turn out for the better but that hope was gradually fading away as the eerie pants and moans of the other androids echoed in their ears. Dread filled the air as gloomy neon lights of malfunctioning LED’s did a poor job of lighting up the darkened space of what appeared to be a basement.

Hot tears rolled down their cheeks as despair slowly nestled within them; abrupt commotion caused them to flinch. The distinct sound of footsteps grew louder and louder as so did the distressing noise of desperate pleas; memories of the past arose in the back of their mind, reminding them of the times they would rather not think about, though it was hard not to as the same nightmare was about to repeat itself.

Loud bangs resonated across the space just as abruptly as the unsettling cries for help; reluctantly, (Y/N) lowered their hands from their face and peeled their eyes open only to be met with the sight of crimson creak running down the dimly lit hallway, forming a pool of deep red. Lifeless body of a middle-aged man lied on the concrete; numerous bullet holes oozed with thick scarlet liquid. Their breath hitched at the unexpected touch of one the fellow androids that leaned in their side.

“rA 9 is coming to save is!” The deviant exclaimed, its distorted features curled in a wicked expression of happiness, covered in numerous scars that made up for the most grotesque sight (Y/N) had the displeasure to witness; though they felt pity and even sympathy towards the poor, distorted beyond repair deviant- only then did it occur to them where they had found themselves in. Horror shook them to their very core just at the thought what was to happen to them; right then their train of thoughts was interrupted by a familiar voice, calling out their name.

“Markus!” A new wave of tears formed in the corners of their eyes, blurring their vision though they clearly saw the familiar silhouette of the one and only deviant leader. Strong arms wrapped around them and they were suddenly ridden of all fears and horrors as if they have never occurred.

“I was so afraid I was going to lose you.” He only pulled away to press a gentle kiss atop their forehead, sending a wave of warmth across their systems that hummed in delight. They were safe.

divider credit

#dbh fanfic #dbh imagine #dbh x reader #markus x reader #markie post #rk200 x reader #requests

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save-the-villainous-cat · 2 years

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Grumpy villain who for some reason has to save sunshine hero, who is badly injured, almost dying. Then when they're safe villain has a break down in front of hero?

Idk if i explained myself well, english is not my first language, sorry.

Have a lovely day/night! I love your writing. <3

“Are you alright?” the villain asked. They felt the shaking in their fingers, how the blood shot through their veins and this oh so familiar feeling of being crushed to death.

They wished they had some power to control their state of panic. They wished there was something they could do, some neat mind controlling trick they could use on themselves to bring their heart rate back to healthy 80 beats per minute.

“I’m still alright, yep!” the hero answered, grinning at the villain, their face still decorated with their own blood. “Just like five minutes ago!”

“Good, good,” the villain said but their body didn’t make any efforts to reduce their own miserable state. They were gasping for air right now.

They could’ve lost the hero.

The villain had recently thought about when losing to the hero had become losing the hero and why the latter was the bigger fear out of the two. But honestly, the villain couldn’t tell. Everything blurred together. It had happened a few months ago, maybe even last year…

“Are you alright, though?” the hero asked cautiously from the (villain’s) big desk chair in which they were sitting. “You look pale.”

“I’m good.” The villain tried to sound as cold as always but their voice seemed to break. “I’m alright. Do you need more painkillers? Do you want to take a nap? You must be exhausted. I can arrange something…my henchmen could…”

They looked at the bloody cloth on the desk, soaked in red soup. They hadn’t finished cleaning up the hero’s face…they knew they had to…

The villain felt their head spin, their muscles tense. They grabbed their desk so they wouldn’t fall over.

“Hey—” The hero made a motion as if they were going to get up.

“Don’t,” the villain warned. They squeezed their eyes shut. “Please don’t move. You’re hurt.”

“You are hurt,” the hero protested. They were still wrapped in all the blankets the villain could find in their basement an hour ago. “What is going on? Should I call someone?”

“No,” the villain gasped. They closed their eyes again, trying to blink the white shapes out of their vision.

“Are you freaking out right now?”

“Kinda,” the villain admitted and then there it was.

They started crying. They didn’t sob. They didn’t contort their face. They simply started zoning out, tears streaming down their face.

And all of it because the nasty nightmares they had tried to fight for the last hours came back into their mind and manifested as too real, too terrifying pictures in their mind.

The hero dead, beaten with blood all over them on their bed.

The hero dead, poisoned with vomit all over them on the ground.

The hero dead, burnt with nothing but ashes all over them in their own house.

“Hey,” the hero said softly, snapping the villain out of their little horror show. “You were great back then, I appreciate what you did.”

“Please stop talking,” the villain said even though this wasn’t what they wanted.

“I mean it.” The hero stood up and to watch them hold their wounds made the villain’s stomach turn.

They could only imagine the pain the hero was going through: their flesh torn apart, one gunshot wound, stab wounds, broken bones, countless bruises…

“It’s okay. I’m okay. You’re okay,” the hero whispered. They took the villain’s hand and squeezed it lightly. They pulled the arm that wasn’t in a sling out of the many blankets and let their fingers comb through the villain’s hair.

“Thank you for saving me,” they said as their fingers pushed hair out of the villain’s eyes, as they scratches lovingly their scalp, as they travelled down to the villain’s jaw and wiped the tears away. “I don’t know what to do without you.”

The villain felt themselves calming down. The hero was there. They were touching them. They weren’t dead.

“That’s a lie,” the villain said, a small smile on their face. Their hands were still shaking though. “You’re good.”

“I wouldn’t have survived without you.” Suddenly, the hero stood up on tiptoes and pressed a kiss to the villain’s cheek. “This is the least I can do. Let me help you calm down, okay? We can help each other?”

The now blushing villain nodded slowly, eyes lost in the hero’s.

#writing snippet #heroxvillain prompt #heroxvillain snippet #heroes and villains #hero #villain #grumpy villain #sunshine hero #hero x villain #heroxvillain #an answer for an ask #request

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aajjks · 2 years

Text

Pretty (Jay)

pairing: nerd!Jay x crush! reader

genre: fluff, FLUFF AND FLUFF.

note. From my zodiac game! this is my first time ever writing for enhypen and idk the group at all I just watched one introduction vid and can I just say that I think jay’s my bias? okey ENJOY!

@mgnedx I hope you like it?

Goodness, you were so pretty. Jay sat right beside you, stealing glances at you, oh, he could look at you forever. It was so embarrassing.

Jay fixed his glasses as he took a deep breath. He had the biggest crush on you. But unfortunately you were way out of his league.

God, you really were so pretty. Him and you were too different and Jay knew that, but whenever he saw you, his heart fluttered abnormally inside his chest.

Jay couldn’t help but look at you again, you looked so good, focused on whatever the teacher was saying.

Jay was supposed to be focusing on the lecture but you were sitting right beside him, how the hell could he focus?

The way your e/c coloured eyes were frozen on the teacher's old figure, he smiled softly.

He wished he had the guts to confess to you.

But, he was so afraid of rejection. You were the most ethereal person he’d ever seen in his life.

And he was a nerd. A loser.

As people would tease him. So, why would you even look at him?

Jay was afraid that if you caught him looking at you like a creep.

You’d actually think that he’s an actual creep.

No.. no no that couldn’t happen. Jay was quick to tear his gaze away from you and tapped his pencil on the wooden desk.

It broke his heart that he could never have you, you were a dream that would never come true.

The bell rang, the student whined in delight as they all stood up from their desk and walked away, Jay was unable to stop himself from looking at you.

You too stood up from the desk, picking up your bag. You looked around.

Jay’s heart skipped a beat as he looked away quickly.

Did you catch him ogling at you?

“Uh Jongsung is it?” Jay’s eyes snapped back at you in shock, his name rolled off your tongue so easily.

“A-Ah me?” He stuttered helplessly, as he stood up. His eyes were now looking everywhere but at you.

“Yes… you.” You blushed, he could tell as you smiled so dazzlingly at him.

God he could never get tired of your beauty.

Your smile was the prettiest one he’d seen.

“Listen… um…” you laughed awkwardly as you rubbed your hand, looking at him with a shy gaze.

“Umm… I-I… I don’t know how to say this but umm… no one is here and… this is the only time I’ll ever get the courage to say this..”

jay listened to you, his heartbeat quickening with each second.

What was going on?

“I-I like you, Jongsung… I’ve liked you for some time…would you please go on a date with me?”

His world stopped as his mouth was agape from shock.

“W-Wha-What? I-I!?!” Jay felt his head spin as his gaze blurred. His mind shit down as he felt his body going limp.

“OH MY GOD JONGSUNG?!??”

“Y-Yes Y/N..” that was all remembered saying when his vision went black as he lost his conscious.

#enhypen smut #enhypen x reader #jay smut #jay x reader #jay fluff #enhypen fluff #enhypen fic #jay x you #jay x y/n #enhypen au #jay au #enha smut #enha x reader

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forcemeanakin · 3 years

Note

heyyy!! can i request a anakin x reader fic where they were together but she left the order?? you know depressed!anakin ... but they found eo again after a few years on a mission!!!!

Hands like home.

•WARNINGS: ANGST. Mentions of abandonment.

Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x Jedi!reader.

Summary: Y/n leaves the Jedi Order after a heavy argument, leaving Anakin behind too.

Word count: 3.7k. Buckle up.

A/N: First request!! So grateful to the person who did it! Thanks for trusting me with your vision. I hope this fills your expectations. :) I did with all my love. I didn't know if you wanted a happy ending or not, sooo let me know if you want the other version as well. :)

If you want to request something, here are my rules !!

Recommendation: While reading, listen to:

-IDK you yet by Alexander 23 (for the first part)

-Touch by Sleeping at Last (for the second part)

I will signal the parts so you can turn on the music.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

(Cue “IDK you yet by Alexander 23” Repeat if you must and want to :))

“And ta-da! This is how you fix a droid’s transmitter!” I pointed proudly at R2-D2 and smiled widely at y/n, who was looking at me with loving eyes.

“I could listen to you talk forever”. She clapped her way to me and then hugged me, her arms wrapped around my waist.

“Would you? I think it would be really boring.” I scrunched my nose and then chuckled.

“No. Never.” She poked her lips up and kissed my nose, to which I giggled. “I love the way your eyes light up every time you talk about mechanics.”

“Well, I love you.” And now I kissed her gently on the lips, slowly, soaking up her flavor. I caressed her hair softly and she cupped my face, smiling mid-kiss.

“We better stop before someone enters.” She separated from me and I whined.

“C’mon, nobody comes to the hangar at this time.” I pulled her back again, only this time turning her around, holding her back against my chest. My arms squeezing her, wanting to feel her as close as I could. She grinned and grabbed my hands strongly. We stayed there, holding each other for what felt like hours.

The sunset was beautiful; different tones of orange, yellow and pink splashing the skyline. Y/n tilted her head, putting the weight on top of my left shoulder, while quietly stroking my arms wrapped her waist. I didn’t waste my chance and I peppered kisses along her cheek, her jawline and her neck, to which she could only giggle.

“I wish we could stay like this forever.” I sighed, returning my attention to the magnificent view and put my head on top of hers.

“I don’t.” She said, caughting me off guard. “I wish we could have more. Leave this glorified cell of institution.” she rolled her eyes. This was not the first time she expressed her disgust towards the Jedi Order. I kept my opinions to myself so I wouldn’t upset her, but how could I hate the place that rescued me from slavery? Being a Jedi pulled me out of a lifetime of misery. How could I turn myself on Obi-Wan, on my fate as the Chosen One? I knew that they were really old-fashioned, but that’s how things were. We couldn’t change them. She continued speaking. “To have a life of our own, be free to show our love. ”

“I wish that too.” I agreed. “Just you and me against the world.”

“Just you and me against the world.” She repeated in a whisper.

“But you know I don’t care if the world doesn’t know that we are together, right? You knowing that you have my heart is enough for me.” She didn’t say anything. I could sense her pain deep inside, her mind going over and over again.

“Does the sun remind you of back home on Tatooine?” she asked, her voice so low I could barely listen to her.

“I never considered it as such. That place is just pain to me.” My spine shivered at the awful memories and I had to fight the tears from escaping. Now she was the one squeezing me.

Her touch soothed me everytime. For some reason, her hands were always warm and soft. My favorite moment of the day was crawling into bed and falling asleep at her head scratches. Or whenever I came back after an exhausting battle and she would welcome me with a hug and her nails would drag along my back. Or whenever she kissed me and cupped my face, slightly stroking my cheek with her thumb; her palms had become home to me and my body couldn’t wait to return to her at the end of the day.

I turned her around and pressed our foreheads together, breathing her in, admiring her beauty. “You are home. I’ll always come back to you, baby.”

She smiled and right when we were gonna press our lips together again, my commlink bipped.

“Skywalker, we need you to backup Master Fisto’s supplies drop-off on Ryloth. It’s a tricky one, we believe Grievous may be there, so there’s a possibility you’ll have to engage. If you see Y/l/n on your way, let her know she must go too. Good luck. May the Force be with you.”

“May the Force be with you, Master Windu.”

I looked at y/n and she rolled her eyes.

“You heard the man, let’s go.” And she buffed while starting to walk out, but I grabbed her wrist and I turned her around. “But first.” And I kissed her like it was the last time our lips would meet. It felt like it.

——————

“I’m not gonna keep talking about this, y/n” I groaned.

“Are you seriously mad at me? With what reason? I did what was right! Those Twi’leks were starving to death!” She yelled back at me. Her smaller legs fought to keep up with my pace.

Finally, I turned around and faced her angry, reddened face.

“But Grievous escaped!” I upped my voice tone to match hers.

“Anakin, I can’t believe this- Drop off the supplies, that was the priority.” She hit her hands on a firm gesture.

“Priorities change! Especially when you are at war! And in case you haven’t noticed, we are in one, y/n! It’s our duty to win it.” She limited herself to buff and turned her head to the other side, shaking it.

“You sound just like them.” she whispered and rolled her eyes.

“I-” I was interrupted by the Council’s secretary.

“You may come in. The Council is waiting on your report.” He let us know.

Surprisingly, the first thing they did after we entered was not to ask for an explanation of the mission’s events. Apparently Fisto already filled them in. What they did was to ask Y/n for her side of the story.

“It was either that or he would have destroyed the cargo ship. I made a choice and I would do it again!”

“Master y/l/n, do you know the implications of this so-called decision?” Windu asked with his palms pressed against each other, covering his mouth.

“Yes. I know I could have intercepted him and that I would have been able to stop him and bring him here, but I was not gonna let those citizens spend another night of despair and hunger! Who knows when we were gonna be able to drop off another load like that? It could have easily been months.”

“You need to calm down, master.” Windu threatened Y/n’s when he saw her heavy breath and hateful eyes. “Master Skywalker, what do you think about this situation? If I recall correctly, you ordered Master y/l/n to chase Grievous.”

All of the eyes were set on me, nonetheless, the stinging gaze of Y/n was unavoidable. She stared at me, starting a visual duel between us. The expectant looks of the remaining Jedi pressured me and pushed me to speak.

“Well, y-yes, I did- But you know, it wasn’t my commanding mission, it wasn’t really my call-”

“But do you agree with your Y/n’s… decision?” Windu added with sass.

I stared at Windu, then at Yoda, Obi-Wan, trying to avoid my love’s eyes but I inevitably reached Y/n. Everything in my body screamed at me to say yes. To agree with her. But I would be lying.

“Well, I mean, the cargo was equally important-” My body worked hard to appear confident.

“Master Skywalker, sense that you are lying I can.” spoke Yoda. “Do you or you do not agree with Master y/l/n’s actions?”

Dead silence.

“No.” I finally spat.

I sensed a disturbance in the Force and I directed my attention to my girlfriend. Her body radiated hate, anger, disappointment, sadness. She shook her head at me with teary eyes, breaking my soul.

“Fine. Needless to say, Master y/l/n, the whole Council disagrees with your course of action and due-” Y/n interrupted Windu.

“I don’t care.” She blunted with poison.

“I beg your pardon?”

“I don’t care. I don’t care what any of you think.” Her tone getting louder and louder. “I made the right call, whether you agree or not! I did what I must. Protect the civilians, keep the peace! I’m not a soldier, I’m not here to fight a war that isn’t mine. What my duty is to look over the ones who need it!”

“Master y/l/n, I won’t tell you again, calm down!” Windu squinted his eyes. “A Jedi does not behave like this-”

“Maybe I don’t want to be a Jedi anymore!” My head almost snapped at her words.

“Master, I would recommend to choose your next words careful-”

“I hereby renounce my title as Jedi Knight.” The Council gasped. Her defying face didn’t flinch once. I widened my eyes and tried to reach out to her, but she was already on the move. I followed her back to her room, where as soon as she entered, she grabbed a little backpack and began to fill it with a bunch of her stuff.

(Cue “Touch” by Sleeping at last. Repeat if you must and want to :))

“What do you think you are doing? Are you crazy?” I pulled her things out, to which she glared at.

“Stop it, Anakin! It 's already done! I’m leaving, I’m finally leaving this dreadful place.” she flipped her room upside down in her little hunt.

“You totally screwed up this time- Can you please stop for a second and listen to me? Please.” I stopped her on her tracks and held her by the shoulders, slightly shaking them.

“What do you want me to say, Ani? You know how tired I am of them, of this war! We are not what we are supposed to be!” She shouted once again.

“What we are supposed to be is together, Y/n! And you totally left me there! Without warning!” I yelled with resentment, my face scrunching.

“You are talking like you didn’t you totally throw me under the bus there! Huh? What was that all about?” She yelled back. Tears threatening to fall at any given moment.

“You know I didn’t mean to! I was totally cornered!”

“And how about when I left? Why didn’t you say something then?” She asked with hurted eyes. “You let me go and you didn’t say a single word.” She poked my chest to the rhythm of her words.

“What did you want me to do?” She escaped my grip and walked to her bedroom.

“To follow me! To say that you were quitting too! That you were choosing me over them!” She twirled midway and shouted at me, completely broken, tears running desperately over her face.

“You are twisting things over, Y/n. Please, think for a moment.” I walked over to her and grabbed the sides of her head, putting a loose strand of hair on the back of her ear. I must admit I was truly hurt when she didn’t cup my face back. “This is not about us. I love you, you know that. Nothing will ever compare to you, you are my priority-”

“So are you leaving with me?” She asked, suddenly extremely calm.

I ignored her question and kept going. “Tell me what I can do to make you stay. What I can do so you won’t leave. I need to know how I can fix this!”

“You can’t Ani! You can’t! I can’t stay, I won’t stay.” My vision became blurry and I closed my eyes, looking down, not being able to face the reality of the situation. “Will you come with me then?” Her eyes bleeding hope. I felt my heart clustered on my throat, the beating sounds deafening me. The solemn silence drowning the room. Her heartbeat boomed on my palms and I swallowed hardly.

“Y/n, stars, it’s not fair. Why did you have to make everything so complicated?”

“Will.you.come.with.me?” The pause between her words building up the tension on the room. Her hands were on my forearms, holding tight to them, holding down to the last hope of us.

“I-I… I can’t” I finally whispered.

“So I guess priorities do change.” She let the last few tears roll down her eyes before she sucked them up. I let go the grip on her face as well as she did to my arms. Her fingers slowly moved to my hands, just to hold them one last time before letting go. We looked at each other so defeated, so breathless. Neither of us strong enough to keep fighting. She reached for her bag and backed away.

“It doesn’t have to be this way-” I began to talk again, but she stopped me.

“Anakin, there’s nothing left to do.” Her lightsaber was placed on the dinner table before marching her way to the door. Taking my heart with her.

—————

After that day I fell asleep to my usual nightmares, just to wake up and realize that they were true.

The first few days were especially tough. I sneaked out to her room and slept on her bed, breathing in her sheets, hugging in her clothes, if that somehow replaced her absence. It didn’t. I cried myself to sleep with the loose optimism that she was thinking of me, just like I was thinking of her.

Then something changed. My sadness turned to anger. How did she have the nerve of getting mad at me? She was the one that gave up. She abandoned me. She didn’t let me know what she was gonna do, she just blurted it out in front of everyone, treating me like everyone else, but I was so much more. She blurted it out like it didn’t concern me. Like the love of my life leaving me wasn’t something I should know. I stopped going to her room, like I used to do when we fought. I even turned my face when I walked past it, refusing to think about her. She didn’t deserve my thoughts. If it was so easy for her to leave me here, she didn’t deserve my tears.

But I never got to hate. I couldn’t hate her. Not even if I tried with every inch of my body. I tried, Force, did I try. I remembered every time she would do things to annoy me for the sake of it: hide my tools, steal my robes, pretend she wouldn’t listen to me when I scolded her. It definitely backfired because it only made me miss her even more. Whenever she hid my tools, she would always return them and stick by my side as I fixed whatever I needed to. Whenever she stole my robes, she would jump around her chambers and say how much she loved to smell me. Whenever she ignored me as I scolded her, I knew she was actually paying attention and she would apologize with soft kisses. I couldn’t hate her. I loved her. With every beat of my heart.

As the days went by, the hope I had of her coming back decreased. And what were days, quickly became months, and then years. The painful hole she left in my chest never got smaller. As if it weren’t tough enough, I hated to be in the Temple; it only reminded me of her, her essence, her laugh. I could only see all of the places we once hid, kissed or walked. I worked on pushing those aside. I forced my mind to block her and all of the moments that kept replaying on my head non-stop. I forced my heart to shrink, so the love I had for her would somehow bleed out of me. I forced my body to forget her, but I guess my hands didn’t receive the memo, because the feeling of her warmth letting go was a pain I could never erase.

That’s why I was constantly volunteering to be deployed.

“Always on the move”. Obi-Wan continuously said, but what he didn’t know was that if I stood still I may not come back from the void and hollow place my mind turned after her departure.

So here I was. On my way to Cato Neimoidia. There was a droid invasion on the central village and the Jedi couldn’t lose the opportunity of annexing another system to the Republic. The 501st marched out the transport with me to the chaos, but everything got incredibly harder with the awful rainy weather of the planet. Our vision was considerably compromised, making it harder to walk. We decided to split up, Rex leading three quarters of the legion to where the main battle was taking place. On the other hand, I took some troopers down to the warehouse we suspected the Separatists had their base. Not to our surprise, some of the droids were waiting for us at the entrance, completely outnumbering us. I reached the warehouse all by myself and I ran through it, eliminating everything at my pace. My soaking wet clothes didn’t help me to be subtle.

I started to notice that the droid's bodies were totally destroyed. But not in the path I came. Someone else is here. I ran quicker, trying to catch up to the figure that was beating up droids when I encountered someone on a dark blue cloak, running away from me, the fabric whooshing behind them as they entered the rainy street.

“Stop right there! In the name of the Galactic Republic-” I choked at the reveal of the mysterious face. When the person turned around and put down her cloak, I didn’t know whether I should run towards them, drop down and cry or turn around and come back to the troop. My heart felt like it was gonna pop out of my chest and my legs started to fail me, feeling jiggly underneath me.

“The Galactic Republic can suck it, for all I know.” She answered witty, trying to keep her composure. But I knew her. She was petrified. She wasn’t expecting me.

“Y/n…” I let out a heavy sigh. Words couldn’t come out of my mouth. My head was dizzy and the extra water on my face wasn't helping me concentrate.

“Hey.” She whispered.

“What- why are you killing droids?” I asked, but that was the least of my worries. What I really wanted to ask was, Why are you there and not right here in my arms?

“Someone needs to take care of the people. Jedi can’t handle them all.” She said with a bare hint of emotion.

“Please tell me this is real.” I begged, holding back so I didn’t burst into tears at that moment. “Please tell me it’s really you. You look just the same.” I tilted my head, pushing my wet bangs out of my forehead so I could look at her better.

“Yet I’m so different from what I used to be,” She said with just a string of voice. I walked up to her and she backed off, stepping on my heart in the process.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry about everything. I should have said something. I should have defended you in front of the Council. I should have been braver-” I blabbered all of the words I had stuck on my head for years. I saw her face softening and her body giving in. “I should have left.” I finally let out the words that would bring us peace. Her face scrunched up, fighting to hold the tears.

“Anakin-” She was interrupted by a hoard of droids coming our way. I ignited my light saber and she got two blades from her cloak, dropping the coat to the floor. We fighted them fearlessly, letting out pain flow through each swing of our weapons. I saw that she got in trouble when they knocked out her blades from her, leaving her defenseless. I reacted quickly and pulled out an extra weapon from my belt. One that I could never leave behind.

“Y/n, catch!” And I threw her lightsaber at her. She looked at it surprised, yet did not hesitate to turn it on and keep fighting. We were back to back, our movements so smooth and coordinated, like they were connected. The droids fell down, one after another like the useless metal they were. After we were done with all of this, we stood in silence, contemplating the view in front of us.

We were panting at the effort and looked at each other, mechanical bodies all around us. Her eyes finally gave in and tears rolled down, to which I joined. Her knees failed her and she fell down on them, grabbing her face to hide her pain from me. I kneeled in front of her and pulled her into a hug, squeezing her tight, not ever wanting to set her free. Our bodies shook when our crying got more intense, letting out of all the bottled up emotions. The seconds became eternal in our embrace and I just wished this moment would last forever. What I would give to flip a switch and go back to when it was just me and her against the world.

She pulled back and looked up to me. I cupped her face and she did the same, releasing some of the burden of my chest with a simple gesture. I pushed our foreheads together and I forced myself not to close my eyes, even if they ached due to the rain, so I wouldn’t miss a second of her beauty. Time got heavy and slow, being almost non-existent.

“There’s nothing I can do to fix it, right?” I asked, terrified to the bone.

She grabbed my hand, put it on her mouth and left a kiss on it, always looking at me with loving eyes. My chest tightened when she shook her head.

“No.” and smiled sadly.

I don’t quite remember the moment I got up from that position.

I just remember staying there as she stood up and turned around, walking away from me. Again.

I just remember staring at her figure and crying my lungs out through muffled sounds. Again.

I just remember feeling her lightsaber on my hand after she left it there. Again.

I just remember staying there completely heartbroken. Again.

I just remember feeling her hands leaving mine. Again.

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omiscurls · 3 years

Note

Diluc, zhongli and childe reaction to their s/o breaking up with them after something they said, maybe after a week or so after they argument they think the s/o forgave them but they break up instead? I WANT THE ANGST

consequences

plot: reader decides to break up with the character after not speaking to them

contains: diluc, zhongli, tartaglia (idk how am i going to do this to my special boy but ill try my best)

warnings: angst, breakups, implied past toxic behavior

a/n: OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO HARD- I DONT HAVE THE HEART TO BREAKUP WITH PEOPLE

diluc

hopeless thoughts ran through your head as you fought with yourself about wether to enter angel’s share or not, hand halfway through to the doorknob. your mind hadn’t been made up just yet, you were still in between two very different scenarios - the urge to forgive him for his hurtful words growing stronger each day, as anger and other emotions subdued to loneliness and the feeling of a part of you missing, ever since the two of you stopped talking.

your mind flashed back to the exact moment when you looked into diluc’s eyes, always so soft and calm for you, forming a way of anger he never expressed towards you before. to the feeling you got right then and there that this man is not the same one you’ve met and fell in love with.

the process of coming to terms with that conclusion was as painful as the first strike of his angry glare, and even though he seemed to have realized the weight of his words right after saying them out loud, no matter how hard you tried, you could not erase them from your memory.

one strike of that pain, one memory of that night was enough to make you go through with your plan, door to the bar opening with a little screech.

it was like just another late afternoon, with charles tending the bar, knights and townsfolk filling the hot room, and the smell of alcohol traveling through the air.

“hi” you said to the bartender “is master diluc around?”

charles, busy with his work, quickly replied that he’s out back, opening a barrel. you nodded and went where his directions guided, pushing open yet another door to see the back of the man you loved, looking just as always from this angle, working over said chore. he didn’t even seem to mind the fact that someone walked in on him working.

“diluc” you said with a sigh, and he almost immediately turned around, tools falling from his hands and onto the ground.

“darling, hi” he replied quietly, walking over to you but stopping half way, eyes set to analyze your expression, figure out what was going on in your mind. “i’m glad you’re here safely, i haven’t heard from you in over a week” he added cautiously, as if weighing every word before deciding to say it out loud.

“well” you sighed again, once again going over wether you should actually break things off right then, mind taking pity on his troubled expression, tired eyes, on the obvious eyebags that were much more apparent than before, a sign that he didn’t catch too much sleep. “i had to come to terms with what i’m about to say”

he wanted to tell you he was sorry, he really did, but words didn’t seem to come out of his throat. obviously he was sorry, it was a bad day and he meant none of what he said, but you knew that, right? you knew he always cared for you and loved you… right?

he wasn’t the best with words, hence, the idea of apologizing with a gesture after you were done teaching him his lesson came to mind. a brilliant idea, one could never go wrong with a thoughtful deed for their significant other, just give him one more chance.

“and my conclusion is, we need to take a step back and… reevaluate things in our lives. i’m not saying this is the ultimate end, but what you’ve said, and how you’ve said it made me realize…”

you were making a good point. you were talking about your feelings. he should listen, but the only thing he heard was the blood pumping through his veins, and the two single words

the end

so there won’t be another chance? he won’t be able to prove himself? what do you mean, the end? the best thing that ever happened to him in his sad life was coming to an end because of him? but he was so careful, he treated you like his treasure, because that’s how he truly felt, like his lifeline, something he could never lose…

and all it took was one sentence too much, one glare too intense. for the first time in what, six, maybe seven years, his eyes began to water, as he blinked the tears back at a rapid pace.

“… and that was a shitty thing to do. i hope you know that. i don’t know if i had anything else i wanted to say, perhaps i did, but… that’s all. see you around, i guess” you mumbled, loosing confidence in what you were saying, taking one last glance at his lost eyes before turning around.

turning around from him, from the love of your life, was perhaps the hardest thing you ever had to do, and yet you did do it.

before you could reach the door again, though, a cold hand caught your forearm. your eyes met his, with just a glimmer of hope that he would magically say all the right words and somehow make you stay, you didn’t want to leave, yet knew you had to. if you wanted to preserve the respect you had for yourself, you had to leave.

why were you giving him time to say something?

his helpless gaze seemed to speak with a thousand words, begging, pleading you to not leave through that door, but as much as his lips did part, not a single word left.

he couldn’t say anything to hold you back, and you ripped away from his grip, turned, and walked away.

and just like that,

he was all alone, again.

he was gonna need a drink.

zhongli

tears flooded your vision, blurring every details of zhongli’s face, causing you to only see a pale color palette, instead of your favorite person, ever. maybe it was for the best, maybe it would make it easier, you thought, but that was a foolish thing to hope for.

even through the salty tears, you could make out his eyes, it’s glow never failing to guide you, and comfort you, now seeming to burn their way through you, through your body and soul.

“you’re stuck in another love, zhongli, we both know that!” you exhaled a bit louder than you intended to, the outcome sounding more like an accusation than a fact. “how can you ever say you love me, when it’s so obvious, and so apparent, that every time you look at me, you see someone else? you HOPE for someone else?”

you could only wish the words you spoke didn’t come out as a complete mess, because of those tears you were constantly choking on. desperation seeped through your voice, as the feeling of helplessness rose every time you looked at your lover and at the anguish, and confusion he presented.

how could he make this so hard? it’s not like you’ve presented some statement he didn’t know already, right?

you hoped your eyes would say all the things you didn’t trust your voice to. you hoped he’d somehow hear how all you ever wanted was to be enough, was to meet his standard, how it tore you open that every time he said <i love you> his eyes wandered everywhere but onto yours, how all his touches seemed absent, how all his compliments were truly about some other face, some other smile, some other kind soul.

the worst part was, how could you blame him? how can anyone, ever, blame someone for being in love, of all things? love was something beautiful, and once you’ve experienced it, you’re drowned in it forever, and don’t even want to see the surface again.

love is beautiful. when you’re the one who’s receiving it. love was beautiful, to you, too, when you loved how his wisdom flew through his words, how his kindness hugged your spirit, how his aura brought you comfort. you loved his eyes, you loved his cheeks, his lips, every single detail of his skin.

the love you felt made you complete, made you warm, until you finally realize the thing you should’ve seen much sooner.

that you were merely a mirror for him to look at someone else, someone long gone.

suddenly all the warmth you felt was directed back at you, burning you inside, making you wish you never felt it in the first place.

“aren’t you gonna say something?” you whispered.

his long fingers found their way to your hand, but you snatched it away.

if you fell onto his charms now, you wouldn’t be able to get out once more.

his breath hitched as he gathered himself to speak

“i want nothing more than to love you” he said, although quietly, it rang through your ears like the loudest of screams.

you scoffed.

“we both would’ve wanted that, then”

“and i’m sure i can, if you just—“

now, laughter was all that you were capable of letting out.

“zhongli, you can’t train yourself to love someone. and even if you could, then how do you think that would make me feel? like i’m so unlovable you had to force yourself through it to grow accustomed to a feeling similar to love?”

“that’s not what i—“

“that’s what it means! let it go, please, please just… let me go” you sighed, standing up from the bench over at liyue harbor that you were sitting on. the sun has begun to set on the other side of the sea, and you couldn’t help but notice, it would’ve been the perfect date.

“i do sincerely hope you’ll find someone who’ll love you just the same” he finally stated, as he gave up on trying to make you stay.

“why?” you chuckled “so i could make them suffer the same way you made me?”

tartaglia

(archons give me strength)

you found nothing but guilt, looking into the endless ocean trapped in his eyes. for the first time in forever, they glistened, but not with a spark of joy, like you always hoped they would, they shone a sickly shine, caused by a thin layer of tears, that didn’t dear to spill over his porcelain cheeks, almost as if afraid of making contact with the ruthless face of the number eleven of the fatui harbingers.

he could’ve easily been crying if only he let himself go. he would’ve been in tears, sniffing and coughing, but he just… wasn’t. he held those tears in the gates of his eyes, as if his life depended on it.

the guilt you found inside them, wasn’t his, but yours. you felt guilty, watching this composed, confident man fall into pieces right before you, crumbling before your sight. why were you doing this? you seemed to forget all those terrible things you’ve heard just from the way his irises begged for forgiveness and brows furrowed in inexplicable sadness.

but you couldn’t, no, this time you couldn’t.

“my word” you swore on dear life you’d burst into tears if your voice shook right now “my word is final. we’re over. and that’s… that’s it. you need to understand that there won’t be another chance.”

the moment his lips parted, you knew you were lost.

“i have told you so many times already, but i will say this as much as i need to, it will never happen again! i swear, on everything i love and everything that i am, i swear on life itself, i won’t ever let that happen again! you know i won’t! come on, i promise you, if there’s anything you can say about me is i do keep my promises, don’t i? darling, please…”

“promise yourself to heal and become better, first” you stated coldly, watching faith disappearing slowly from his fixed look.

“im sorry, you know i am, im sorry, im sorry, im so fucking sorry!” a scream left his throat as desperation took over both reason and self-respect.

“sorry isn’t gonna cut it”

“then what will? i’ll do anything, anything in the world, anything to prove myself to you. i get that you can’t love me, i understand that, but please, let me win your trust again.”

he said unnaturally calmly, compared to what he did before, and you got concerned immediately.

i understand that you can’t love me, his words rang through your head. oh god, what were you doing? guilt stroke again, right at where you felt your heart to be.

right when you wanted to turn around and leave, he must’ve sensed that, and pulled you into a tight embrace. not suffocating, as they often describe it, not toxic and desperate, but… as loving as every other hug you’ve ever received from him. as calming and grounding, even though you could feel his heart racing. he didn’t refuse for you to leave, he didn’t trap you.

you understood after a while,

he was saying goodbye. all the love trapped inside his heart seeped out onto you, all his feelings surrounding and engulfing you.

“let me promise you this” he whispered, voice shaking painfully “the next time i’ll see you, i’ll be a better man. someone you will be able to be proud of, someone worthy of both your trust, and love. i won’t stop until i’ll be enough for you to look at me without the disgust and fear you have now. i promise. i’ll be better.”

“until then, then.” was the only thing you were capable of saying before leaving.

as soon as the door shut behind you, you rested against a wall and covered your mouth with a hand, unable to hold your tears any longer.

you heard a cry through the door. so he does have some feelings left, after all

your daily reminder that requests are open [here]

#genshin angst #genshin impact #diluc angst #zhongli angst #childe angst #diluc x reader #zhongli x reader #childe x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin impact x reader #gender neutral reader

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chuuyrr · 3 years

Note

hello again! i hope you’re doing alright and not overworking yourself! <3

may i request a one shot with toji and gojo, where the reader goes to toji after small inconveniences with gojo (him yelling, arguments or stressed out from taking care of her) she that feels like gojo doesn’t want her as a daughter no more, so poor baby scarlet witch runs to find comfort with toji (since she brought him back to life 😭), only to ask why he left her and megumi, "they couldn’t been a happier family". obliviously she doesn’t know her own question breaks gojo’s heart once he finds out.

angst please, i love pain. 🥲

"couldn't be happier" — scarlet witch! baby fushiguro! reader

jujutsu kaisen x reader

masterlist of the series

warning(s): possible anime/manga spoilers for jjk, use of strong language, screaming, fighting, angst & low-key no comfort

helloooo im so sorry if the request took so long to get done, i don't have much time for writing lately due to school and i may or may not be struggling to write with angst, i don't mind getting angst requests—i just don't think im very good with em' 😭

no worries, im not overworking myself! i make sure to take breaks both from schoolwork and writing so don't worry :D thank you so much for the concern and requesting <3

(p.s. this was painful to write, i may or may not had tears in my eyes ngl and idk, i hate the ending fgdshwksja)

gojo satoru was no doubt the strongest. having been gifted with the six eyes and natural talent, he was burdened with expectations and hard work throughout his life. eventually, he had you too, some time when he was still barely a graduate. just as toji had asked him, gojo took custody of you and raised you as if you were his own. but sometimes, even the strongest people can fall, no matter how powerful and invincible-like they can be. just because gojo is strong, it doesn't mean he doesn't get tired or stressed out because he does.

exhaustion and stress are inevitable, and it became even more inevitable when he had you. not only did he have missions to do and students to teach and look after, now he had a little girl to parent and care for. all of those things tend to overlap, which is the very reason why you ended up running away from home.

you only wanted to play and get your father-figure's attention since he was so busy. you did get gojo's attention, just not the kind of you wanted.

"why can't you just fucking leave me alone for a second?!"

you could still hear gojo's booming voice; it was echoing inside your head. your couldn't handle it and you longed for comfort. with tears blurring your vision, you made your way towards the first person that came to your mind. fushiguro toji. the same person you brought back with your chaos magic as soon as you remembered who he was to you. although you were fully aware that toji was your biological father, you never lived with him and insisted on staying with gojo—maybe that could change today.

using your magic, you easily located where toji was living in an hour. you knocked on his door, almost banged on it from desperation. you watched the door swing open to see your biological father with an infuriated look across his face.

"who the fuck do you think you are banging on my do—toji's eyes widened when his gaze fell towards you. he cut himself off, completely caught off guard from the sight of your red-glowing eyes, which were puffy and red with tears streaming down your face. "[name]? oh god, i'm so sorry princess. i didn't know it was you."

before toji could even question you, you ran towards him and hugged his pant leg, clinging onto him and crying.

"hey, now. hey." toji took hold of you, picking you up to coddle you in his embrace and when he did, you buried your face against the crook of his shoulder, grabbing onto the fabric of his shirt pitifully.

"it's okay, angel. it's okay, i got you." his voice was hushed and soft-spoken.

toji brought you inside, opening the lights, continuing to cradle you in his arms, whisper comforting words in your ear and rub shapes on your back. he pressed a kiss on the top of your head in hopes of soothing your crying down. your cat-like grip on him was making his heart shatter. he could feel your nails digging and tears dampening the fabric of his shirt.

you remained in toji's arms until you had completely cried your heart out. once you had calmed down, toji placed you down on the sofa in his living room, momentarily leaving you for a second to fetch you a glass of water. when he returned, your eyes were back to their [color] color, and the red vapor of your magic had dissipated.

you practically gulped down the water toji offered you and almost coughed which prompted him to rub your back again. "easy, angel. easy, now. you good?"

as you nodded your head, you wiped the water that trickled down your chin as soon as you stopped coughing.

"how did you find me, angel? erm—how did you get here by yourself in the first place. where's gojo?" toji watched you visibly frown when he mentioned your other father's name.

you shook your head as your your [color] eyes fell at your feet. "he's not here.. it's just me."

"did something happen angel?" toji placed a hand on the top of your head and gently ruffled your hair. "you're not hurt are you? did you get lost? i can call gojo if you want?"

you shook your head once again, and this time, you were fiddling with the hem of your sleepwear. yes, you ran away in your pajamas. "i ran away from home." you admitted with a small gulp.

"you ran away from home?!" toji repeated your answer. "wha—why?" you flinched at toji's raised tone of voice but relaxed when he mumbled a quick yet short apology.

"i don't think he loves me or wants me anymore." you could feel fresh hot tears threatening to spill from the brim of your eyes, the lump in your throat now becoming hard to swallow. "i think.. i think i'm just a burden to him."

"it must be a misunderstanding, angel. how can gojo not love you anymore?" toji pulled you into his lap and let you curl up against his chest. he brushed a hand on your cheek and tucked your head below his chin. "you're not a burden. you are so loved, baby."

as you leaned against him for comfort, you silently enjoyed the warmth and affection toji was giving. you remained in his embrace when a question came into mind.

"h.. hey.."

you started quietly debating whether to call toji as is or dad, but just as you were struggling to find the right words, he responded.

"what is it, baby? do you want some more water?" toji gently pulled your head from his chin, brushing a loose strand of hair across your face.

you fiddled with your thumbs. your tear-glazed eyes suddenly became unable to look at his green ones. "why did you leave me and megumi behind?"

toji looked at you in surprise. he was clearly not expecting such a question from you. at that instant, the tables turned. toji was now the one who couldn't look at you straight in the eye.

"why did you give us away? did you not want me anymore too?" your lips quivered as your [color] eyes turned a glowing red color.

of course, gojo never told you. didn't he? toji swallowed thickly. he hasn't felt this nervous in such a long time. toji remembered the very reason why he refused to take you back from that limitless sorcerer, even after you ressurected him. the guilt was eating him up again.

"no, [name]. it's not that i don't want you." toji began and straightened his posture as he took a deep breath. "we couldn't have been a happier family."

"what do you mean?" a breathless question trailed from your lips.

"i gave you away because it was for the best. i did it for you, [name]. for you and your mother. you won't be happy with me. why do you think i never took you back from gojo even when you ressurected me?"

you don't understand was what you read from his mind, and he was right. in fact, you don't even know why you asked him such a question when you should already know the answer, but then again, you were just a kid. of course, you wouldn't understand why things are like this.

"couldn't be happier.." your lips quivered.

your frame began to tremble. gojo's shouting was replaced by toji's words instead, and it repeated inside your head like a broken record.

tears were streaming down your face again, just like earlier when toji found you outside of his place. "no.. you don't want me either. that's it." you shook your head, sniffling. "we could have always been happier, we're family. so, why are you saying that?"

it didn't take long for gojo to come find you. as long as you were emitting chaos magic energy, he could feel you, except this time, you were projecting a weighty aura. it is the type that feels as if you were being choked. just as your chaos magic began to involuntarily act on its own, making the entire place tremble and furnitures levitate with your power, the door swung open.

"[name]?" you turned your head to see the ever familiar snow-haired man you saw as your dad.

toji cleared his throat and almost scoffed when he addressed him, "hey, gojo."

"what.. what are you doing here?" gojo's tone hardened when his gaze met the person you were with. "why do you have [name]?"

"'why do i have [name]?' she stumbled all the way here, crying and needing comfort. don't speak to me with that kind of tone like i'm the bad guy here. do you even have any idea what she has been telling me?" toji scowled.

the chaos magic lingering in the atmosphere dissipated when toji lifted you from his lap, placing you down on the sofa before standing up to face the limitless sorcerer. "[name] told me she feels as if she's a burden to you and she thinks you don't want her as a daughter anymore."

gojo's heart sank to the floor. "what?"

"and now she's asking me why i gave her away." toji stressfully ran his fingers through his hair.

gojo turned to face you, but you adverted your gaze, not wanting to be seen crying with puffy red eyes and tear blotches all over your face. "[name], baby." he muttered.

"you promised me you would take care of [name] and you let her out of your sight. what if something bad happened to her, huh?" toji angrily snapped at gojo.

"stop telling me what to do. you have no idea how stressful things have been." gojo retorted back, "if you're so good at parenting then why don't you take [name] back?!"

"that's why i gave her away! i just want [name] to be happy, so make her happy. don't make her feel like she's a burden!" toji wagged his index finger at gojo, but with his infinity on all he could touch was the force between them.

everything was overwhelming your senses, and the grief in your chest was making you numb. why did you have to run away? why did you have to bother gojo when he was just stressed out? why did you have to ask toji why he left you and megumi? all of it was too much for your mind and heart to handle. maybe if you just kept your mouth shut and never left the house, then this wouldn't have happened, but now gojo and toji were fighting because of you.

you held onto the sides of your head. their yelling both in reality and in their thoughts. your chaos magic was so high that you were subconsciously reading their thoughts.

"stop fighting!"

toji and gojo halted and stumbled at the tremor that elicited from the immense energy you had expelled the moment you cried. they turned their heads towards you to see your eyes glowing a menacing red color as you stood up from the sofa.

"please, don't yell at each other." you sniffled, your voice sounded meeker this time. "i'm sorry for running away. this is all my fault."

gojo was the first one to react to your outburst. abruptly leaving toji, he went towards you and knelt down to your height. "no, no. kikufuku, it's not your fault. okay?"

"you don't want me anymore." you cried, your tiny hands attempted to push away gojo but failed.

gojo picked you up, coddling your in his embrace to cradle you. "no, baby. no. of course i want you. god, i'm so sorry. don't blame yourself kikufuku, it's my fault. i didn't mean to say any of those things to you."

"stop saying that. stop messing with my head." you continued to cry and push him away from you.

"[name], you will always be my little girl. you will always be my daughter. believe me, baby." gojo pressed a kiss on the top of your head and continued to cradle you. tears were now glazing his eyes at the words you were throwing and the way your hands were trying to shove him. "i'm sorry. i'm so sorry. i was just stressed out. i shouldn't have lashed out like that."

your crying lasted about an hour until exhaustion caught up with you. you had been crying out for the entire evening that you passed out in gojo's arms. gojo sighed in relief and pecked your forehead to see you sound asleep with your head pressed against his shoulder and arms hanging over his.

toji spoke up after some time. "please take her back home."

"i will." gojo answered back. his tone of voice was much softer this time compared to earlier. he gave toji one last look before disappearing with you in his embrace.

once gojo brought you back home, he tucked you in bed and sat on the edge. gojo's thoughts lingered on the words you told him, especially the question you asked toji. tears pricked against his eyes as he interlaced his hands in yours while you snored in your sleep. it shattered his heart and absolutely destroyed him. if only you knew how sorry gojo was.

he took hold of the blanket hovering you and slipped in underneath. gojo pulled you to his embrace and whispered silent apologies and promises to make it all up to you when you wake up. the guilt continued to rack him straight in the chest until he had fallen asleep right next to you.

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