#idk im just…I’m experiencing human emotions and i wanted to share this reminder with everyone cause i really think it’s okay to lean into

[gg-astrology]

hey, i wanted to ask how can we comfort the signs? like idk which planets we need to look at (moon, sun or the others?) but could you maybe do a brief description on how to make them feel better?

Hey there! ❤️💕 What a great ask! ❤️💕 

The Twelve Signs + Comforting?  ⬇️

On the topic of Comforting Someone

Premise

I’d say probably to be genuine and open to helping in your own way/what you can first of all, I know sometimes people just need to see others accept them and their feelings in the moment. 

Learning how different people operate and what they’re comfortable with comes with trail and error sometimes (and I’m probably not an expert on this yet) – but learning how to take on a supporting role or express what you can (able to take criticism and know that this isn’t about you, but how you could make it better/what you can learn from it) can help not just them but you a lot as well.

So just so that’s clear, this is a learn-able skill that we can learn and get better on. Trail and error happens, accept apologize and use it to be better (taking it personally as your own expression being criticized makes this about you and not them, the person who actually needs supporting/comforting). You’ll know when someone is victimizing themselves or manipulating the narrative, I’m saying the above for people who wants to get out of that habit (self-realization and cutting off toxic behaviors) as well. Be genuine, be yourself. But also be open to learning and change and seeking different ways we can learn to not feel so helpless/stiff comforting those around us.

Anyways now that that’s out of the way – people are self-sufficient to an extent, if someone needs time away to go do something you can just prepare for their comeback and provide supplementary support then instead. If someone comes back with unhealthy prejudice/mentality, this is where the supplementary support comes in. You’re essentially checking in on them and helping them help themselves be a better/healthier them. But it’s not your role to take on their problem/stressors, you’re there to help them be a better them. I hope this resonates with people out there who needs to hear this ❤️💕

Considering I was going to say looking at their overall placements would help, again you don’t have to take on the role of handling the responsibility for them so don’t feel like you ‘oh libra mars so this would help, oh cancer moon so this would help’ – don’t stretch yourself trying to do everything, they are self-sufficient. You’re there for support and to help witness their growth themselves.

Because it’s everything that’s going on, people are multi-faceted. There’s no one right or wrong way to comfort someone, they can adapt and grow and take on multiple expressions of others to help themselves as well. 

That’s why being genuine is important, you’re only you and you’re trying to help them as much as you can. I think for this answer, learning about the person helps a lot more because you also need to see where your expression/you fit into that person as well. 

Anyways, that’s a long ramble incase anyone needed it. I get what you’re asking though, I’m just thinking of all the ways this answer could go.

Like say you a Capricorn, I could say recognizing their strength and paying attention to them (genuinely, not overly stressed but sincerely) would help. And it would. But also this Capricorn has a Virgo Moon/MC, sometimes they can stubbornly deflect any compliment that comes their way when they’re in their space/feels queasy about it.

This Capricorn/Virgo could also have Cancer in 8th, they may not realize they need emotional support when they hit their lows. But a fateful meeting with a Cancer who could provide/show them genuine ‘im in your corner’ despite them not being able to do that or even consider it for others (the Capricorn/Virgo) can change the game for them (nurture). It’s in the chart (nature) – Cancer in 8th is right there (nature activated by nurture) — that impact once felt by someone being in their house (planet falling there and actually activating it) mean the Cancer’s genuinity and sense of expression ( the supporter/comforting person) helped the Capricorn and made them realize it themselves too.

So there’s different levels and complexity to this… but I get what you mean. Like it’s just good to have something to ballmark in order to ‘start’ that connection with them. It can be your younger sibling who you’re trying to y know, provide support and figure out the best way to help their nature be good foundation for their future nurture. It can be a friend who you’ve never seen broken down, suddenly needing some kind of support from you and you just want to know what/when/how to help.

I can’t answer a straight-forward answer since it depends on them, depends on you, depends on a lot of things. But I can help loosely/briefly, the bare stuff I’ve experienced myself that might be a place to start for you too? (again, I’m not an expert on this either I’m sorry ;;) ❤️💕

**again this is just my experience and this isn’t something that is completely definite for everyone so please use your own discretion about it too**

Aries - they’re not as unwilling to listen to you as you think they are. Their own vulnerabilities themselves doesn’t always come easy when it comes to expressing it out first (and unrolling the carpet there completely)  

Take the lead, speak genuinely about your own experience/heart and show your vulnerabilities first if you can. They’re willing to listen and understand it if it’s you – they’d much rather be in a position where they can keep their strength and you can respect that.

So take that lead and come to them equally –  this is an equal relationship and you’re taking on a role that allows them to keep a part of their strength to help you. But they are willing to learn and listen. After saying your peace, tell them what you figured out and how this connect you to them if that’s how you feel/think.

For me, I’m saying ‘this is something i want to work on, something i’ll have to get better at’ and look them in the eye and ask ‘what about you? what do you think?’ – at the end of it, I usually go ‘let’s work on it together. We can have this thing individual– both, together. Let’s work hard.’

In the case that your Aries is frustrated, needs comforting and you’re approaching them. Bring your experience forward and have that connection with them, where you are individual people who respect your difference but uplifts each other up. ‘Lets work on it together’ helps a lot. Let them have their strength, and believe in it for them without making them feel weak.   

Taurus - sometimes they just want to be accepted when they frustrate over a problem themselves. Their minds and emotions can be muddled, they think they shouldn’t care but they don’t realize it’s just sitting and waiting ready for them to actually confront the problem.

Don’t confront the problem for them lmao, let them air out their steam and remember to remind them that you’re there (presence wise).

You don’t have to be equally heated about the issue as they are, you just have to be willing to listen and understand them first. Usually, help with clarifications and asking ‘well, what do you want?’ helps (not as— y know, dismissive as it sounds) clarifications or explaining your thoughts/opinions also helps. If they go ‘no that’s not possible’ then don’t press it. It’s in their mind, you can only just hold their hand and listen to them talk more. Again, expressing your clarification on the thought patiently and thoughtfully helps. If it comes down to rotating the same advice over and over again for them to finally hear it– so be it. Be their soundboard if you have the time.

You can’t help them if they’re brooding in their problems, if it’s a bad day and they’re in a Mood. Just your presence is enough, be kind and open, be yourself and understanding. Have patience when they finally lose their cool, and encourage them actually to not repress/keep things in and actually talk about it to you—  because they should talk about problems, it’s not ‘nothing’ and it’s not invalid. Try to guide them in dropping bad habits/muddled up thoughts, and eventually they’ll learn and grow. They’ll appreciate your presence through their tough times as well.  

Gemini - honestly, a little structure won’t hurt you. Usually you can leave them be, when they come to you they probably already has an opinion/something figured out so they just need to exchange that information around– they’re not usually asking for your opinion about it, but hear them out and pick out the part that you think is interesting/they can go further with (active listener)

You don’t actually have to participate in giving them advice but they would appreciate if you could respond back or give feedback, you don’t really have to worry about holding a conversation just as long as you come to them without a guarded heart and is just being yourself as well. Be fun, be serious, have opinions or have passion about something. They aren’t looking for you to focus or look directly at them – they’re just looking for you to be you and together you can share that together.

A Gemini distressed and needing comfort is one that probably in the midst of working it out on their own – their anxiety is making them zoom around trying to see what they can do, resources, things to figure it out. Let them and be there are supplementary support. You don’t have to offer to help them with their problems, they’re kinda self-sufficient. But what you can do is to ask them to tell you what’s up or what’s happening, generally just speaking it out loud into existence and having the space/human to hear them through tends to help them out a lot as well.

Cancer - a distressed cancer, besides reassuring them and (honestly) just apologizing before reasoning out why you’ve hurt them by being insensitive at a time they expected certain sensitivity from you. You can also hear them out, accept the part that is your flaw (your lack of sensitivity/consideration during the time and a promise to be better/prove it as well) and then get it straight with them.

A cancer who needs comforting is the one who would appreciate your support the most, and that support doesn’t have to be purely emotional. This is an opportunity to build an understanding of each other– you, understanding that emotional need is important (and therefore not invalidating the pain they feel) – as well as you being as objective as possible, explaining how you see the problem to them.

You’re a team, you’re working together. You aren’t trying to demean or devalue each other, you’re trying to progress together.

So as you have it, you gotta validate and voice out their strength while being inspired by them as well. They in turn– will show you the same kind of cordial respect, and you can help them by expressing part of your strength you want to help them grow into having as well.

Again, you aren’t growing into each other, you’re growing up together. Be their support, be the believer in them as much as they do in you. You can learn a lot from each other even when the Cancer needs comforting. Let them know they bring you strength, this isn’t about appreciation as it is about making hurtful things ease up/become more tolerable/easier to accept that it doesn’t hit so personally anymore and you can both grow to have balance in both.

Leo - sometimes, you just have to wrap them up and take the wheel for them. Leadership is knowing that you can’t hold one role (the strength) all the time. You aren’t a good leader if you can’t be part of the group being lead as well. 

Sometimes the biggest help a Leo can get is coming to meet someone sure and confident in what they’re doing without being particularly aggressive/compensative about it (in this moment/context). 

Showing/expressing what they’re going to do without making things so complicated and nuanced all the time. 

It’s just them, this is natural and comfortable for them. No this person isn’t making exceptions for the Leo, this is for them as much as it is for the Leo and this is how they fit together so well. It’s natural, and it’s them leading this time to open the ground up for the Leo to feel comfortable being in that presence (sharing that space) too. 

So in this case, this really isn’t about the Leo. But about you and how ‘you’ you are when they need to be reminded it’s okay to be ‘them’ them as well.

Rather than talk more about appreciation and attention and being there (which you probably should already if someone wants that) – this is about you proving yourself without doing so. You’re you. And thus, in the presence of you being you– they are allowed and accepted to be them them as well. 

The idea is that, people are allowed to turn up– and turn down. None of these are unnatural and sometimes we get into the habit of being distinctive between these two all the time. Distressed and comfort comes from feeling the stability of those modes of ‘us’ having to adjust or adapt. Thus – opening up a space where they can feel comfortable testing the waters and getting ok with it is something that can help them out a lot.

If it’s not about opening space up for them, and this is about them. Comforting a Leo is the easiest because you can’t go wrong with giving more and more to them. There’s no such thing as moderation, just give to them. Sometimes that’s literally all it takes, whether they ask to be taken in consideration for or be taken seriously. Whether they want to play/given attention, whether it’s something else. You can’t go wrong with just listening and being okay with them. Just spend some time with them and give them your full energy, that’s all it takes. (It’s the accumulation of it that matters, literally just give in and that’s all it is)  

Virgo - Surprisingly, socializing helps them out a lot more than keeping to themselves. God knows they really do just keep to themselves though, their normal mode is isolation. For anything at all, if they think they need to ‘focus’ on something just watch your Virgo go into self-isolation mode again (some are introverts but that doesn’t mean it should be made an excuse if you’re not working well as an introvert either y know – detriment habits are detriment habits, how much people/socializing you can take is up to you/depends on the person.) 

But – the thing here is that, that doesn’t necessarily help them because going out of their own mind, breaking and putting yourself back together isn’t exactly effective coping mechanism just saying. They work well if they keep that very specific ‘edge’ or momentum yeah – but that’s literally stepping on a wire trying to tight-rope and going ‘I Know What I’m Doing! God! I don’t need Safety Precautions!’ 

So.. for Virgos. Comforting them means dragging them out and just letting them work it out on their own that they do better with people than alone. Your Virgo will use their usual sharp tongue and displeasure 100x to voice it out sometimes – but here’s the deal. Someone has to know what’s going on.

Despite them thinking they know best (or you being convinced by them – that maybe stepping back and going ‘oh ok theyre gonna be fine’ is going to be ‘okay’—but when it doesn’t work out that way, you both will just watch them crash and burn to something that could be prevented if one of you step up your game)  

They usually don’t know best. Virgos know this– you don’t know best! And that’s okay!! Because that keeps you driving and hungry for more things to work on!! It’s your sense of drive and part of your essence!!! That’s your strength not your vulnerabilities!! That’s perfectly fine!! It’s just– other people need to know that you do know you don’t know best too!! 

But Virgos won’t admit to it, because they don’t want to be taken advantage of and who knows what other people are going to trample over (accidentally or not) – if they themselves don’t know them best (Virgos), then who’s to say other people will have a better idea about them than say – them (Virgos)?? 

That’s why part of comforting a Virgo is acknowledging that they don’t know best (but not stepping over that line y know) –  sometimes someone should take the wheel for them and be wiser than them because they don’t have all the answers. But like– have some senses about it y know?

Libra - Honestly unless they actually speak up about it themselves (the situation/problems) as far as they’re concerned there Isn’t a problem and if there is – they want to figure shit out on their own first. Kinda like gemini– except they may for-go social interaction in order to brood and do their own stuff (with other people).

Let them rant, or talk about it. Just listen to them because honestly, they want to figure shit out on their own but they just need to know you’ve listened, reaffirm and came up with a bit of possible solutions that you aren’t forcing onto them as well (because they probably won’t take it or will weigh it in their mind a bit more before figuring out something themselves) 

The thing is they probably don’t want you to remember them for their vulnerabilities which is – y know, it’s about impressions and impact that can have on others. 

Besides vulnerability being something that makes people go ‘oh god what if they remember my weak moments and use it against me’ – or just the overall dynamic/balance of the relationship y know? Like the overall picture of the relationship (over time) – what does it consist of and what can they minimize on? 

If those vulnerabilities became part of the relationship as an Impact Impression of them, they’d much rather be remembered for getting through and moving past it. Which is why most of the time– Libras would divert your attention away from their actual problems/things that are new developments in them that they have to figure out first before they expose them to anyone. 

It can take a while for them to open up or even accept comfort thats not just– y know, cordial niceties with appropriate distance away from each other. Usually if your dynamic and roles are tight – they know their part and you know yours. They’re well aware of your openness and experience with the problems, they’ll consult you about it. The push-pull of the dynamic is an add on, it makes it easier for the Libra to trust that partnership with someone and talk to them as well (*depending on what dynamic/partnership it is honestly).

(Also, sometimes if it’s not that serious you can just pamper them. Pampering helps. And I don’t mean that in an overdone way.) 

Scorpio - I don’t know why they’re the easiest/most natural to comfort to me?? Like Scorpio comforting is literally to just take them seriously and be there for them. That’s literally it. 

You– you literally don’t have to agree with their thinking/ideologies all the time because god knows they can be messed up sometimes (and they’re allowed to be, that’s part of being human?) 

Sometimes they just need to have their emotions supported, be there for them. Be present. React and reach out with your own integrity. This is literally all it takes– to not make light or dismiss/wave away their feelings. It’s not something you can go ‘I’m sorry bub’ and then go ‘anyways this thing happen’ and push it back onto you or skitter around hesitantly. Just care for them? But like, don’t push yourself onto them right now, y know? Be sure and honest. That’s literally it.

More than anything, they just want sincerity that’s clear and simplified. Truthful and honest, nothing indecisive or ulterior about it.  

It won’t hurt their feelings, you just gotta open up the space with them and let them talk about things/share things with you. And you can do the same back. You better have your own ideas/solutions and expressions as well. Don’t be a useless bub, intensity isn’t as scary as you think– if you don’t understand something, just say it rather than fibbing them (god you just have to be honest and truthful with them in whatever capacity you can be honestly?)

Even when they’re hurt, they aren’t unreasonable. Rather even when they’re hurt they’re still a reasonable person who has their own explanation for things. So you honestly don’t have to be so afraid to come to them with your full sincerity and genuinely with your thoughts?

You’re trying to help them and comfort them, the best thing you can do for them is to be just as honest and open about your thinking. Touch them with your heart instead of trying to reach them with anything else? Because your heart– that’s the thing that shines the most. 

This isn’t about what you’re saying or having to be worried about how to say it – as long as your heart is in it to be there to help them 100% 

Match up, that’s all it takes honestly. The rest of it, we’ll figure it out as we move further.

Sagittarius - reaching out to them helps. Like honestly, I think if you’ve ever interacted with a Sagittarius you’d know ‘oh they have alone moments’ where they go off by themselves. But honestly– reach out to them, with no expectations y know?

Expectations kills the deal honestly. Let them go escape and go off on their own world, comforting a Sagittarius means leaving them messages with no pressure for them to reply immediately or at an appropriate time. You’re just sending them in because you think of them and stuff. You yourself should be capable of holding one side conversation sometimes too.

It’s reassuring when you may be unavailable but your close friends still invites you out to places but understands your different availabilities as well. It’s not reassuring when they ‘assume’ things about you. Assumptions and expectations kills everything, that’s like– the death of comfort for them honestly.

So to comfort them, let them know there’s space/place for them when they return. Leave that space open, it isn’t affected by time/effort/expectations/assumptions. 

You leaving for a period of time as well – consumed by other stuff that needs attention too in your life– doesn’t mean that you don’t care about them, gave up on them or is hurt somehow in their absence. 

Let them know they can take time and security in your relationship, that their own health matters too. Part of their problem is they can sometimes be bad at multi-tasking things and their own health, so when they’re about to break – remind them by gently forcing them to go take breaks because you can see them wrecking around the seams. Keep in contact honestly, if not for your sake– for theirs. Just do it.

Sometimes they just have to go, set the bar real low for them. You don’t have a bar. The bar doesn’t exist. All that exists is your relationship in an infinite space/time condendum that says your relationship relies on mutual freedom and space. That’s literally it.

Capricorn - me, a capricorn. Having absolutely no idea how to comfort a capricorn. Actually I DO know, the opposite of Sagittarius. Be there for them. Check in on them but don’t be forceful or nosey. Here’s the thing– when a Capricorn unloads, it’s a lot and it’s heavy. Think of it as a ratio, if you come here already pushing 80% of your emotions onto them, they’re gonna be reluctant to accept comfort from you because that leaves 20% for them and ugh what the hell are they gonna say/keep back in that 20%?

Come to them with 0% empty space and let them paint, fill it up with their thoughts and weight. They’re great painters (metaphorically) honestly, you just got to give them a big enough canvas so they don’t have to be afraid of running out of space while doing it.

Getting a Capricorn to open up is in stages, that’s why you need 0% empty space. They won’t spill everything at once, they’re gonna unload the first layer and see how you deal with it. And then if you’re ok (don’t be close-ended/think that’s over and done with) – they’ll unload a follow up to that, a deeper level to it. 

You really can’t take it for granted, because the way they do it is like a story report/update of their internal being that unfurls in layers, and has a narrative that links to one another – so it builds on each other, everything is connected and it’s different faucets of them. It’s from their perspective, so that part is consistent. But if you can see the deeper story, they’re multi-faceted and they want you to see/acknowledge that. To point it out and help them acknowledge it, they don’t want to be one-dimensional to others y know?

Let them unfurl and paint their story, honestly. You’re the art appreciator, and your words and comments have an impact on the next piece of painting as much as they themselves do. Appreciate that in them.

Aquarius - this is like a mix of Capricorn (eyy saturnian friend) and air sign aversion tactic which is: you kind of have to be there for them with your genuinity/from the heart – actually hear what they say/are saying. 

Comforting an Aquarius means they might not feel completely 100% opening up to you about everything unconditionally – they’ll kinda evaluate how wise and open you are on the topic. 

Because what they’re trying to figure out can spiral down a rabbit hole where they have to understand it themselves (rather than adopt/take yours) So most likely, you can have your opinion – but make sure you don’t assume or think that your opinion is the end-all be all for them. 

The Aquarius will work it out in further detail on their own, they’d appreciate having your support, open-mindedness and understanding of the topic (hearing what you have to say about it)  – at the same time, what matters most is that they can find their own way across the street.

It’s not the same when you’re going to a new place with someone, and have them guide you through it/give you tips and tricks. Versus you going to a new place and being capable of navigating yourself through the street with your own gps/guidance now. 

 It’s kind of like that, they appreciate comfort for sure. But unless they can understand it for what it is – it’s value/worth and experience with it. Sometimes comfort is in the presence and open-mindedness/wisdom, and they’re the one who might just need a little push sometimes to get their footing back again.

On the other hand, I kinda understand that sometimes opening up you’re afraid of people disillusions about you. Not wanting to not be genuine or how to explain complexity— like how we’re always growing/moving and sometimes we shift away from who we were before into who we are now. Reconnecting with someone who doesn’t share the same experience or understanding can be uncomfortable and jarring, especially since it’s not the Aquarius’s responsibility to teach/educate them about years worth of growth/development if they haven’t found out about it themselves as well (or go out and reach it).

Pisces -  Let them spill their problems, honestly being an open and reactionary listener helps a lot. They don’t want your advice, you just have to ask and actually be open to hearing what they have to say. 

Much like Sagittarius, being an open space helps. In the case of Pisces, sometimes you have to change your outlet to let them plug in because they have different latitude of problem sometimes (they won’t burden you with their problems if they think you’re not ‘there’ yet or understand/have experienced with the problem yourself– so taking notice of this/what theirs is and then bringing it up and being open with them helps a lot). 

Comforting a Pisces means letting them know that you do love and care for them, verbal reassurance helps a lot even if you don’t know it. Don’t be afraid to sink deeper into emotional territory, if you want to explain the things that made you miss them and why– they won’t be opposed to understanding more of you either (take yourself seriously, and take your emotional importance seriously honestly– so they can take you seriously as well) .

They’re very low-maintenance and that’s a good thing, check in when you can and don’t be afraid to let them know whats on your mind/how you miss them. 

If you don’t have much time due to your busy daily life – just expressing some of your affection in the narrow gap where you can (between your activities) is honestly good enough. Be sincere and affectionate– a breath of fresh air of honesty and affection/emotionality helps gives them support and quells some of their worries/warms their heart.

Approaching them with a comforting heart and the ability to listen, the ability to open spaces up for them helps so much. Talk about expressions and emotions, about activities and interests. You honestly can’t go wrong with knowing how to love and comfort a Pisces – you literally just have to have space for self-expression and being considerate towards them. That’s all there is to it?