#idk what to do to feel less like shit but i need interactions and i'm literally here begging

[taffywabbit]

idk if i'm way off the mark on this, but the way some people are responding to that Guillermo del Toro interview about the decline of studio animation is a bit frustrating to me. specifically the bit where he talks about "emoji animation" and how everything is over-animated and pushed too far and things are rarely allowed to not be ultra-cartoony (y'know, because animation always needs to be marketable to children who are never trusted to have attention spans, right?). like, i think he's generally correct about it! but some folks are taking the wrong message away from that.

i've seen people going off about how "soulless" and "corporate" various recent examples are, and talking about these pieces of media as though they're the result of some kind of personal failing or lack of skill/range on the part of the animators, and it's just like. do people realize that's the only animation you're usually allowed to DO in the industry, unless you get incredibly lucky and land yourself on a project/studio that's unusually cool?

when i was in college for animation it was literally drilled into us nonstop that everything had to be pushed more, that exaggeration was not a guideline or a sometimes-treat but a hard rule that always had to be applied regardless of what was going on, because the viewer couldn't be trusted to pick up on subtlety and we sure as hell couldn't be trusted to convey it. you ever wonder why there's such a specific vibe to a lot of self-directed student films, particularly ones that are focused on character acting/interaction or deep emotions and introspection (especially when there's minimal/no dialogue)? it's because for a lot of young animators, they haven't had the freedom to experiment with realism and subtlety up to that point and they're likely not going to have it again for a while (or at all, unless their career path leads to higher positions where they might have more creative direction over the things they work on. which also becomes a lot less likely if they're anything other than a cishet white dude, for what it's worth).

i would LOVE to see more nuanced, realistic, understated motion and acting in animation. i WANT more characters to be able to express what they're feeling through natural body language and facial cues and for scenes to allow me to breathe instead of spelling everything out in giant bold flashing text all the time. what del Toro wants to see changed in the animation industry sounds great, and i hope others join him in seeking to revamp what modern animation is allowed to be.

but as things currently stand, and as they've stood for a long while now, most artists doing the grunt work on the shows and movies you see are completely at the mercy of corporations and networks who have a vested interest in producing a very specific kind of marketable and cost-efficient media all the time. (and by extension that style is ALSO what's taught in most animation schools, because their job more than anything is to grind you down into a perfect little sweatshop worker who will bend over backwards to meet quotas and get your work approved and not question the higher-ups, even if you have little to no personal investment in the projects you're working on, so that the studios who employ you can maintain their good reputations or whatever)

anyways idk what my point was here, this really just sorta became a rant and my views have undoubtedly been coloured by my own personal experiences (this kinda shit is largely why i dropped out before my last year of animation school, for the record).

i guess just be kind to folks in the animation industry? they've had it fucking rough nonstop for well over a century (the majority of them are still not unionized and there's HUGE pushback against doing so in many places). i assure you they are doing their best to infuse the latest uninspired illumination flick or weird spinoff kids' show with literally any amount of soul they can. you don't have to like the stuff that gets produced by any means! be a hater! i'm certainly not gonna stop you. just remember where these creative decisions come from and why these conditions exist, and consider that when YOU watched something and thought "hmm that could've been done better", you can bet your ass someone actually working on it probably thought the same thing but couldn't do anything about it. these things WILL change as the industry itself improves, but in the meantime folks have to pay their rent, and that usually means doing what they're told and working in a way that will minimize revisions and meet quotas so they can keep their jobs. it sucks, but it is what it is.

[bobbyfiend]

I'm a little high so now is the perfect time to write shit.

TW: mention of violence and (briefly) of suicide

Today's shit is: Stop saying Fragile Masculinity unless you know what the fuck you're talking about.

I feel the boldface above is perhaps too aggressive, but whatever. Moving on.

The interwebs seem to think Fragile Masculinity means a man who is fragile. Or a guy who is a douchebag. Or something. IDK. What does it really mean?

Fragile Masculinity (a.k.a. Precarious Manhood) is an academic theory about the nature of "masculinity" in patriarchal societies. From here on out, I'm talking like the theory, so I don't have to say "according to..." 100 times.

Masculinity isn't an innate aspect of a person in this conception; it's a status or identity conferred on certain people (i.e., people who look like "men") by their culture or community.

Your culture gave you masculinity, and it can take it away. Easily. "Fragile Masculinity" means that masculinity, as a concept or identity or social status is hard to achieve and easy to lose. It's fragile, get it?

Femininity or Womanhood, by contrast, is not thought to work the same way, usually. The theory isn't really about women, but writers/theorists comment on the contrast, sometimes: Women in patriarchal societies aren't potential people in charge, or even particularly agentive; they're resources to be utilized. Those resources need to be available at any time, and how they feel about that, or what they've done in their lives to be good resources are less important than mere existence and availability. Women become women, generally, just by growing up and having the "right" biological bits. Even bad women are still women. Even women declared good for nothing but sexual or domestic use are still women. By contrast, men become men (i.e. masculine) by doing the right things, and not doing the wrong ones, and they stay masculine the same way. Masculinity can be lost easily.

How do you lose masculinity? You fuck up. You fail to do the things the culture thinks men should do. You fail to retaliate when another man insults you. Or compliments your girlfriend. Or makes out with your wife. You fail to commit the situation-specific violence your society requires of men. You fail ?o dominate others--especially men--in social interactions. You get dominated--much worse if by a woman. You show insufficient physical strength, or (worse) you show fear of being hurt.

I'll stop with that, now. I think you get the picture.

Or you do things the culture says men should not do: you listen to your gf or wife's thoughts a little too much. You play a sissy sport or no sport at all. You hang with gay people. You are gay people. You are (or seem to be) trans--and yes, the system seems to be rigged so that both MtF and FtM trans people will generally be seen as insufficiently manly.

Getting the picture? You don't become a man just because you get physically older; you have to do things, and you have to not do other things. Otherwise, you're not a man, not really.

And every damn day there will be at least one (and maybe a hundred) tests of your manhood. If you fail to meet any one of them, your "man" status can be damaged or revoked.

Why is that so bad? Because non-men have no place in patriarchal society. Men have a place, weak-ass men sort of have a place, women have a place (most of them, most of the time); non-men do not have a place. Non-men do not receive or deserve anyone's respect or even kindness. Non-men are homo sacer. Hurting them is a great pastime because it both harms someone who should should be ashamed to exist and gives you status points with your buddies (this includes both men and women). "Hurt the outsider" is one of the most reliable methods for bonding with your tribal group. It's even better if the outsider is a traitor, someone who used to be one of you. Outsiders can be hurt because they're outsiders. Traitors should be hurt because they have committed one of the worst possible moral wrongs: they were good group members and then they chose to not be. It's disloyalty to the group. Non-men are traitors so fuck 'em up.

What is a man to do who has been declared "non-man", or just lost some of his man status, or is just worried he might? Maybe he gets the most manly job ever: cop, soldier, WWE wrestler. Maybe he makes sure to commit some extra amounts of culture-sanctioned violence or domination. Maybe he kills himself.

I hope you're getting this. Fragile Masculinity is not a description of some men's insecurities or overcompensation (though it's not totally separate from that). It's a sociological/critical theory about the concept of masculinity itself, and how it works within patriarchal cultures. Masculinity in such a culture is fragile. It's hard to achieve and easy to lose. That has a lot of really bad consequences.

[alice1505]

I made the mistake of rewatching Sherlock because I never did finish it back in the day (I was -clenches fist- seething over the queerbaiting and rage quit after not fully watching episode 1 of s4) and I'm here to make my side hyperfixation (what year is this??? Who am I???) Tumblr's problem. The more I sit with s4, the less I like it 😂 There were pieces and elements I liked, but overall, it left a bad taste in my mouth. Forgive me if any or all if these points have been talked to death, I missed all the discourse and I'm hella late, but I need to flail and send my thoughts into the void because what even WAS that season? I can't believe I avoided it for years, got drawn in by a couple of tiktoks making fun (affectionately) of superwholock Era and That Scene about the fucking phone charger port, binged all of it, only to be left with..... that. Not nearly as disappointing or rage inducing as spn's ending but by God, did it leave a hole in me. So please ignore my rambling thoughts as I slap them down here for my own sanity.

• First and foremost, what - and I can't stress this enough - the fuck was UP with the assassination of John's entire character???? What was that??? Why????

• Related to that point - I can appreciate the angst point and potential it provides, as I'm reading many, many fics, but AYO WHY didn't anyone rip John an entire new one for that beat down he did on Sherlock????? Hello???? 911?????

• Tell me why everything felt so stilted and borderline icy. Like I get the high emotions and shit, but after a certain point... 😭 was there a falling out between Benedict and Martin that I'm not aware of? Did they just try to ungay everything so hard and were so pissed at the audience picking up everything THAT THEY PUT???? into this show and their interactions that they just hit the brakes hard enough to make everything feel weird???

• A lot of it felt weird. Off kilter a little. Forced in some places, toned down in others (and toned down where it shouldn't have been), a nod to ships but weirdly/hatefully??? Idk if that makes sense. Like the whole Sherlock and Molly phone call (I do not mean any hate to this ship, I really hope it doesn't come off this way. Not my cup of tea but you are valid). Why was Molly so upset BEFORE the call? Did I miss something? Also I don't personally think or feel she'd still have those feelings for him??? I??? I am bamboozled.

• to that whole point, Eurus was.... Hmm. Mmmm. She was. Something. (Confused derogatory)

• I like Mary as a character. I also hated her. (Definitely biased by my shipper trash ass self for johnlock, I'm sorry). Wtf were those messages, please. Edit: AND ANOTHER THING. John's reaction to Sherlock's death - awful, gut wrenching, beautiful, my heart breaks with and for him, utterly devasting. John's reaction to Mary's death - had me sitting there like🧍‍♀️(it was weird. so weird. awkward. w h y. (we know why, but also the acting choices were Something TM, in both cases! for different reasons!) i'm sorry i just can't get past my anger and put off-ness with mary, fun as she could be)

• why did mycroft and John switch roles 😭 pls. The last episode was just. So Much. The lackluster responses from John, to John, to Sherlock, between them, like.... hello???? Who are these people?? Help me. Moriarty saved me for a brief shining moment tho, God bless.

There's more I could spew, but that's what's sitting right at the top of my head. I guess all this just to say, if a show runner/writer really just fucking hates the audience they got (instead of the one they wanted), they probably shouldn't have fucking become a show runner/writer in the first place. Either hand it to someone who can actually handle it and listens, or fuck off. I will never understand when shows and plots and characters gets kamikaze'd because of a show runner being pissy and egotistical. Like ????? Grow up. Learn from Bryan Fuller and Hannibal or something.

Sorry for all the rambling, bless anyone who reads this and makes sense of it 😂

[pseudophan]

idk if this is confirmed or if im insane but i feel like dan in his why i quit youtube video was talking about how he felt like there was Dan content and Dan And Phil content and how he felt like he was split between them....i wonder if hes trying both to see what he still likes to do. he had his internet show and now danandphilgamws is back like. i have a feeling he's trying to figure things out rn

i think dan ultimately wants to do his own thing and has a lot of ideas and aspirations, specifically he wants to be a stage comedian like his passion is clearly for live performances and while the comedy bit is still being fine tuned (i'm not saying he's bad, in fact he's kinda good ngl, but he definitely has a way to go if he wants to be Great) the performance part he's got DOWN like say what you want about that man but he ooowwwnnnsss a stage. also he's weirdly great at audience interaction lmao? that was my main takeaway from we're all doomed, both the pre show and the show itself, he deals with heckling like.. AMAZINGLY well. he's genuinely hilarious responding to an audience like i never thought i'd say this a few years ago but i think he might actually have a future in live comedy lmao????

but i also think he.. needs money LOL like he's said many a time he doesn't really love being a full time youtuber, but also he does enjoy making youtube videos! just, you know.. not full time. but while on his own channel making Daniel Howell(tm) videos he puts a lot of pressure on himself, and then if he does a slightly less high pressure series or whatever (dystopia daily) it's relatively well received and the videos are good enough but like.. it's not the traction he wants, nor the traction he needs

ultimately dan knows that if he wants to keep and potentially build an audience online that lies in Dan And Phil. it always has and it always will. and i think for a long time he struggled with that, and as much as people gave him shit for it i completely get it. like, lmao, of COURSE he wants to be recognised for his own abilities and not just the dynamic and chemistry he's got going with... his literal partner. honestly it would be one thing if dnp were just comedy partners because there are a lot of comedy duos on the world who've made it big, but i think there's something about it being him and his full time actual real life boyfriend/life partner that kinda makes it weird. and as much as i love the dnp dynamic i still do get that feeling so much like honestly who can blame him ?? if your entire professional life is just.. your personal life but on camera ? that's weird. it's gotta feel weird and it's definitely unfulfilling for someone as aspirational as dan and i can't blame him at all for it

that being said, dan clearly does really enjoy making videos with phil. which yeah of course he does, he gets to just turn on a camera and talk shit with the guy he talks shit with all day long anyway. and i think what he's now realised is 1. if he wants to keep/build an audience, the dan and phil branding is where it's at and 2. he needs an income while he works on whatever solo projects he's got going on, and dnp makes a loooot of money

basically my point is - dan seems to really enjoy making videos with phil but he knows that's not really a life long career choice. as much as i'd love them to, it's not really an option for them to be playing sims when they're like, sixty. and while phil is relatively chill and seems to just take things as they come, which tbh is probably the healthiest way of doing things, dan is very overthinking and wants to get ahead of everything and also in general just like.. he wants to build a career! he wants to build something on his own and i can't fault him for that at all. dan knows that one day he's gonna need something more than just Dan And Phil if he wants to keep working, and he's laying the groundwork right now to be able to do that

again, though, i don't want anyone to take this as like 'dan is only doing dapg to make money and rebuild a fanbase' because as much as that is definitely a big part of it... just look at the man. in these videos. he's having a great time. and also, as annoying as we are, he does kinda love us. sometimes. maybe. <3

[muffant]

I got an adorable idea!

What if the animatronics in security breach played D&D! Now I'm not talking about the characters inside a fantasy realm I'm thinking what if a person left a players hand book at the pizza Plex and the gang devoured that shit up!

Id like to think Freddy would be a support roll, more the type to help the party indirectly. He feels like the most inclined to spell casting. Id put him as the type to do Wizard, Cleric, Paladin, or even Druid! Id say hed likely stick to the races in the players hand book, probably a human main. He's very into playing a character, even if that character is the same sweet person each time.

Chica is your major roleplay player, she would be all about getting into the mind of her character and really selling it. She plays any race, and class, and often is the one to pick her class race combo last so she has something to go off of, as a challenge. When she does choose you know my girl is Bard all the way. She's also the only one to actually read the history of the races and really get into the D&d lore.

Roxy likes playing a modified monk, (in fact as a over all rule they play with a lot of table rules!) or a rogue, she usually doesnt pick any other class, as well as loving being an elf. She's a little less on the roleplay side (but can't help but bounce off of the others when needed) she's more of a combat centric player. She loves winning encounters, loving puzzles, anything. She's likely to be the one min maxing her character. Which has lead to some fun experiences when Chica asks about how she became a Cleric, Paladin, Druid multi class.

Monty is exclusively a fighter dragonborn. He loves being allowed to smash shit up and have no *real* repercussions. However he's not actually combat driven, he's a roleplay player similar to Chica, only he expresses he can make 101 characters with out needing to change the mechanics of said character. It's scary how calm Monty can be when he's in the role. (Said calmness started to carry over to work life too!) That doesn't stop a burst or two which thankfully only results in a pouty gator. Monty loves exploring the worlds, it's his favourite thing. To picture landscapes and worlds completely different from his own. And then be able to interact with those worlds.

Sun and Moon are the DMs! Sun is a story focused DM, he loves crafting a narrative, playing NPCs, and developing the world's of his story. He's the one usually in the spot light for a majority of the time. The rest of the time is Moon. Moon is a challenge focus dm. He loves crafting riddles, puzzles, combats, and difficult choices at the party. When ever it's moons turn to take over the table all the lights go out and dark red ambient lighting fills the room. Moons challenges are to be feared as Moon takes death in the game as a real and possible thing. While Sun tries to avoid it happening all together. Funnily enough Moon doesn't like improf, he has his encounters planned almost to the T, including alternative paths the party takes, INCLUDING DEATH OUTCOMES. He is meticulous. Sun on the other hand has a half ass idea of what the session will be about related to the over arching story, have a few bullet points of required information, a few bullet points of optional information and just goes from there. He has a party who eagerly love to make their own decisions and discuss where to go and what to do.

I like to imagine that while one is running the work for the day, the other is planning out their portion of the session, always able to communicate and keep track of details together. While Sun is playing Moon is taking notes, more for himself really.

They play once a week on Sundays, seeing as that's their only day off. They play 6 hour sessions usually and go on many tangents. But they enjoy playing so much, after all its the closest thing they get to freedom.

Edit: I FORGOT DJ!!! Of course he would be allowed to play!! And the little DJ dudes too idk what their called. DJ seems like the kind of player to sit back and watch everything happen, communication is a bit hard but he's still included. I think he would play a bard (very classic) just so he could have an excuse to play sound boards during the game. Speaking of which they definitely play games in the west arcade, with DJ helping set the ambience with music and sound effects. I like to think he secretly downloaded files like leaves russling to add to it. DJ likes to work on theme songs for each character. He simply enjoys being included even if it's limited.

[lavernius]

Use this ask as a prompt to talk abt Restoration :3 I always like reading your posts w/ your thoughts

Thank you! Heads up for the usual "I'm super RVB critical" disclaimer but here are my assorted thoughts.

RVB: RESTORATION SPOILERS under cut, very rambly, TLDR at the end.

The premise was interesting! I think I (personally) would've appreciated it way more if it had actually followed RVB13 directly, but that's beyond anyone's control. Tucker becoming the Meta is great, it would've been nice to see a real-time progression into it. Kinda sucked that Tucker himself didn't get as much focus as a character, but they probably didn't have time to squeeze in anything past Sigma mentally torturing him and Tucker's passing comments about not wanting to help him.

The animation was okay. I won't flame it because they were probably on a time crunch/low on crew, but some parts of it looked worse than others. Action sequences looked pretty good though.

They were trying to do a "final encore" thing by bringing back some old characters (even as cameos), which is, like. Fun? But I feel like focusing so much on Freelancer seasons (with Niner, Wash's hallucinations, Tex, the Meta) snubbed Chorus, which is fine, but a little sad to have the final season reflect on people from the past but not show any Chorusan past Grey. It's RVB, though, so the cast is way too huge for that shit to work out smoothly anyway.

Sarge's death sucked. I think I laughed through the whole thing because I was so baffled. It was expected, and while the comedy of it all fit him well, I just don't think it was good as like. His last ride, you know? He didn't die a valiant death, the comedy lead up was an "oh god don't do it like THIS please" moment for me. Subversion is fun but falls flatter in the very last installment of a show that's been going on for two decades. I kinda? liked that Grif was mourning it, but because his death was so lackluster the entire "This is the end for me" speech didn't grab me.

Seeing as she's my favorite Blue, I'm very happy they brought Sheila back, but bringing characters back randomly without…much explanation (did they explain that? Maybe I missed it) felt weird to me. I loooved Sheila's bits in the season but it felt like a forced cameo. Niner was similar, even if people wanted her back, but at least she had Sheila to explain her presence. Making FLISS and Sheila the same person was a crazy move I need to write a dissertation on though.

Speaking of feeling forced, half of Grif and Simmons's conversations felt so ingenuine. Like they were shoehorned in to MAKE them bicker and not natural. I knew (the second the season was announced) that they weren't going to do shit for Grimmons, but for ONCE I didn't really find…ANY of their interactions especially riveting. Simmons letting Grif leave was HILARIOUS from a meta standpoint. Physically splitting them up at the end as one last fuck you to the gay people.

Caboose felt better than he does most seasons. Still an ableist mess in some places but I loved his IDGAF attitude. The big Meta fight was just fun for him. He just wanted to win. He was fucking with Lopez on purpose, speaking Spanish and misunderstanding him. He should've been more of a little shit earlier on. His voice acting sounded good! Inflection is always annoying but it felt less…egregious this time?

Donut got fucking robbed?! Kai too?! What was the point of giving them development. There were so many places where Donut would've been great to have in! Throwing the memory unit at Tex as a parallel to their BGC rivalry, helping Wash through his problems, IDK. Sucks.

When the fuck did Doc die. Why him. (< Rhetorical questions.) Wash mental health stuff is awesome, though, I love psychotic Wash, even if the portrayal was a little predictable (to someone who was paying attention. I was thinking about Lopez) and imperfect. I'm kinda glad his issues were focused on without him being a major character. PISSED Carolina only showed up on his behalf and stuck around for his sake, can't a girl live for herself sometimes…

Ummm. Lopez was there. I want to wring him like a wet towel. He's medicated as fuck and got to talk to someone who speaks Spanish…and his WIFE was there…I'm so glad he was having as best a time he could and SOOOO glad they wrote him out early like I anticipated (just personally because I love-hate him, but it was cheap). Go on an adventure with Sheila gayboy. Run away from all of this.

TLDR: Overall, solid 7/10. I went into it expecting a 5-6, but was pleasantly surprised by it overall. It felt VERY forced in a lot of places, the pacing felt bizarre sometimes, I still don't even know where exactly this is placed in the overall timeline (and I don't care), but they did some fun things. I'm so glad it's over I hope I never have to see official RVB content again.

[sophieinwonderland]

I'm sure we've vented in your inbox before but we're seeing this round of "it's just ableism" shit and it's so annoying we wanna drop this here to share our thoughts/point:

Anti-endos are doing this repackaged transmed shit, and we were there for the transmed shit. We remember when people were telling non-binary folks that the discrimination they faces was "misdirected transphobia". We were there when people were saying that it was just an online issue. These arguments are the same ones! And they were mainstream!

And what gets to me is that this was like, less than ten years ago. Idk if it's because they were too young to be around for it, weren't in those spaces back then, or what. But it baffles us that this exact same rhetoric is being shouted completely unironically.

Any person stating that anti-endo bigotry is only a tumblr issue or it's DID discrimination that's just a little confused, would have sided with the transmeds during Obama's second term.

-Faye

This is way too true, and it's really sad that it is this way.

It also frustrates me that people keep having to relearn the same lessons every decade. That the exclusionists who pretend to be inclusive today because it's popular end up repeating the same exact arguments as the ones who oppressed them.

And it feels to me a bit like their values are just dependent on what's popular at the time, not any deeper moral philosophy or critical reasoning. Which if I can go on a bit of a side tangent, I hate this above all else. It's one thing that I just really can't stand. Morality that's subject to the whims of popularity.

Like, stepping away from syscourse, I feel like this is true for a lot of queer exclusionists. These are people who have gained a fair amount of acceptance because of people with inclusionist values. People who worked hard to make the world more inclusionist by going against the majority. By looking around at the world and saying "actually, how things are now is wrong, and they need to change."

And that's a hard thing to do. It's hard to realize that the vast majority of the population is wrong, and to stand up against the overwhelming majority because it's the right thing to do.

I feel that exclusionists are coasting on the work done by inclusionists who have fought tooth and nail for them, while clinging to the same mindset as people who, in past generations, supported their oppression. And ultimately, repeating their same rhetoric on new "acceptable targets" that haven't gained the same widespread acceptance yet.

(Note that when I refer to widespread acceptance, I'm referring to within individual communities that queer individuals are regularly interacting with. Nonbinary acceptance isn't everywhere, but it's common enough on sites like Tumblr, and locally in left-leaning cities. Adding this addendum because I'm sure somebody will want to read this in bad faith and argue that I'm claiming there's acceptance of nonbinary people everywhere, or something of the like.)

[dandelionflowery]

Intro post!

(breast cancer awareness post here/the legends of tumblr here, variations here and here , alt link for number 7/arch nemesis Cynthia here) [the two topics are wholly unrelated]

HII!!

My name on the internet is Dandelion, but you can call me whatever you like honestly. It's so hard to find a good name around here, the fae keep stealing them

I use any pronouns, online people default to they/them, IRL people default to she/her, you can use whatever you feel like!

I'm aroace 🧡💛🤍🩵💙 and my gender is up to interpretation lol

I'm 16 and I live in France but I have both French and American citizenship (so i do speak both french and english)

I have both scoliosis (diagnosed, 45°) and probably dyslexia (not officially diagnosed but all the internet tests I did were screaming at me to go get an official diagnosis- as has life lol) and those two really hate each other who deCIDED SCOLISOIS SHOULD BE SPELLED THE WAY IT IS (if i spell it correctly be aware that either I copied it from somewhere, or i thought about it for WAY too long, or it was a monkeys on keyboards thing)

I created a blog just for reblogging shit (aptly named @dandelionflowery-reblogs) but even with that I can't promise to tag stuff correctly on either blog...

I'm not often super active on here, at least not regularly, mostly because I have way too many classes but sometimes I go absolutely insane and spend like an entire day on here (oops)

actually i'm most active on here I think now lol

~~☆~~

I like:

- Harry Potter (Drarry, Deamus, Romione, Linny are my main ships but there's a decent chance you could get me to like a specific portrayal of just about any pairing lol) [also fuck jkr]

- The Marauders (WOLFSTARRR! Also Jily and aroace Peter and maybe Remadora. Same thing as before: open to other pairings [I know of and appreciate the ships with the girls but usually I'll lean towards the first ones mentioned actually I'll lean towards wolfstar with background Jily and aa battery Peter)

- Reading and books in general

- Fanfics, fanart!! (Both writing/drawing them and reading/simping for them)

Speaking of which, I have a side blog that's actually technically marauders themed! @mybrain-fanficedition

- Interactions on here!!

- there's probably some other stuff I like but I can't think of anything rn

~~☆~~

I don't like:

- Following from above, I said I was open to pretty much any pairing, ... I lied lol

Idk what jegulus did to me but i just don't like it for some reason (jegulily? lovely. jily? fantastic. jegulus? less.)

- Also the usual list of if you're pro-genocide, homophobic transphobic uh racist, pedophile or just a generally mean person

~~☆~~

I like talking to people even if you don't know what to say just say hi!

Also I have other social media, come find me if you want!

@/flowerydandelion, @/dandelionfloweryart and @/wands.swords.and.books on Instagram!

On Ao3 I'm like 90% sure it's DandelionFlowery and uh probably similar usernames on Discord and Reddit [though I'm not often active on there]

Wait if I link my ao3 that means i need to actually post my fics lol

Leave comments if you read my fics, I love feedback!! (or just leave kudos, it makes me irrationally happy lol)

~~*~~

tags about my current wips featuring really bad summaries:

#third time's the charm- Lily

(not going to be the actual title i think but first i have to write it, we'll worry about titles later)

Lily decides canon sucks and she's going to do something about it

#our broken hearts- an ode to wolfstar (this one is subject to change bc that title is way too sappy for me)

Sirius dated Peter. And Marlene. And Lily. And James. And then Remus?

~~*~~

totally normal link trust me :)

if you still trust me (and why shouldn't you?), here's the ULTIMATE PRIDE FLAG lol)

let's see how trustworthy you think i am

wanna see some stuff i wrote? (warning, a friend said it took them half an hour to read just the main bit lmao)

an apology 1 | 2

useful tumblr post about hobbies

SNAIL CROSSING SNAIL CROSSING SNAIL CROSSING

~~*~~

side blogs: @x-lovegood @xenophilius-quibbler (Xenophilius Lovegood rp) @sybilances (Sybill Trelawney rp)

@antheia-anthousai (nymph oc)

@mybrain-fanficedition (as mentioned above)

@am-i-a-crab (crab army!!)

+ another gimmick blog but i'm not saying which one >:)

[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

ABOUT 4/4 EP.12

We can all have our own opinions about Day getting a successful eye transplant. We're all allowed to like, dislike, have mixed feelings, whatever about it. But I think some things need to be addressed about the ways we express ourselves and how we interact with other people.

First of all, let it be known: I would 100% prefer Day didn't get his sight back. I think it would be more meaningful to the narrative of growth and learning and would send out a positive message that disabled people aren't missing something, they're just as whole as everyone else. And that happiness is possible in its entirety for us too, regardless.

This being said, what I'm about to say has nothing to do with my personal opinion of the ending but about the way people are handling things here.

1st of all, no one's opinion rules over anyone else's, even when/if that is the opinion of the majority. Fandom doesn't have a hierarchy and it's not a political system either so it doesn't matter if "a lot" or even "most" people think a certain way. They're still not more or less right than anyone else. Period.

Furthermore, an artistic creation belongs to its creator(s) in the sense that they can do whatever they want with it. Can you think it sucks? Yeah, sure. But you can't tell them what they can or can't do.

So, this thing of people acting like Aof should've done X instead because "it's what everyone wanted" is pure bs. Let that be clear.

Then, okay, you just don't like the ending. Should you not say it? No. By all means, do. This is fandom, after all. It thrives on opinions. And points of view. But you have to do so respectfully. "So I can't say it's shit??" Not a all. You can say it's shit. What you can't do is say "and everyone who disagrees is ableist" or say you consider the ending ableist (which, btw, fair, you can definitely see it that way) and then imply that any positive opinion of the ending is likewise ableist. Why? Because this is art and, thus, subjective. And opinions, big shocker I know, tend not to be black or white. Even more so when, as far as I've seen at least, there's a considerable amount of disabled people in the fandom and some of us liked the ending. So what? Are you gonna just assume all of those people are ableists?? Like, sure, just like women can be misogynistic so can disabled people be ableist but that definitely should not be the assumption you make about the group right away. And I don't think it would be a fair thing to say even if the person you're attacking isn't disabled, so... It's just stupid. To not be able to take an opposite opinion to yours or frame your opinion in a way that it makes it seem like everyone with a different one is evil is just fucking stupid. And childish.

So please, if you're mad at the ending, understandable, but take a step back. Breathe. Bite a pillow, punch a bag, call your friends to complain, go on Discord with the besties, idk... But take that step back. And then come back and comment on all the reasons why you don't like it, by all means, we love analysis. But don't be an asshole. Pls don't be an asshole.

Thank you <3

[solar-sunnyside-up]

heyyy its me again :3

so my culture is VERY anti-mending bc of reasons (torn/mended clothing brings poverty or some bs, im not following it but my parents are very strict) and i have little chance of even being able to go to the library much less participate

so all i can really do is gather resources, which is really disheartening since, yk, im two years away from moving out and 2 years is a long time for a teen like me

i guess im really just asking for affirmation since i can do next to nothing and i kinda feel bad for calling myself solarpunk bc it just feels like the anger at the system is festering and kinda hurting me since i cant DO anything

and all i can do is wait and watch as the world feels like its going to shit bc of climate change and people hurting each other bc theyre different

and i honestly hate actually gardening even though i like the idea of it (or maybe im just too burnt out to put any effort into anything idk)

im not sure what else to say, sorry about the vent/asking for affirmation

Hey I hear ya! There's a lot of stigma around mending and the ability to interact with our groups irl given the way our system is currently built is extra hard!

This doesn't devalue what you do, doesn't mean your wants and values mean any less just bc society and current situation are literally built to keep you isolated.

The thing is, we have to find where we can and sometimes that means all we can do is daydream or read or nit take physical action.

And that is super duper tough. To be so far from the end of the tunnel that you honestly can't see the light. The big thing is that we inspire each other so that we can wax and wane as needed!

I was once a "useless lazy" teen who only daydreamed of earthships and solarpanels. And now I'm on the board for my community. Writing grants and emails to get food at events so kids can come and so we'll known in my community I can't go on walks with headphones in bc ppl wanna chat. But even if I had never done any of it, my value as a person isn't diminished and I'd still proudly be solarpunk. And so, even if you do nothing the rest of your life, you are too.

[tostadamika]

Daniel Watches She-Ra & The Princesses Of Power

-S1E1- 'The Sword Part 1'

Today's She-Ra Watch Art: This shitty Glimmer doodle.

Look I promise they won't all be garbage ;-; I promise

Okay I wanna preface: Not every post is gonna be this detailed, I didn't even intend to go on this long with just one episode but I lost track of time. Some posts I'll be short & sweet. Some I'll be long winded to a comical degree. Depends on my feeling.

I think I'll just keep it to one paragraph per episode, & only pull out the long rambles when I finish a season. I think that'll work. Yeah.

Okay so I have no idea who any of these people are because I literally just started but one of these guys is a lizard. I'm a huge sucker for lizard people in anything ever so I immediately like this fucker. He's a lizard, that is all I need. He's just instantly cool because lizards are fucking rad as hell dude.

So Cat-Ra speaks, that first fucking line of hers.

The fucking "Hey Adora"

The first fucking thing I said to myself, out loud, was the immediate reaction I had to that line: "Oh so they're gay."

I don't know if it's like canon or not but one of the things I know about this show is people ship them a lot. I have no idea if that's actually like a canon thing in the show or not but I've seen a lot of fanart of them so I know people at the very least WANT them to kiss or hold hands or get married & buy a house in the suburbs & raise like 5 kids & watch Shrek on VHS & talk about doing their taxes or whatever idk.

That being an actual thing in the show itself? Uh I guess I'll see what happens so who the fuck knows man. Maybe they just explode idk.

But like....dude. DUDE. The fucking way Cat-Ra said it was just....

SO fucking extra like that immediately felt fruity to me. I'm already getting that vibe from her. On top of that, the way her & Adora continue to interact in the episode also give off a very distinct vibe, a rather, ahem, 'fruity' vibe. I think I'm already getting the idea of why this ship is popular. I do believe I see the vision.

Also, quick tangent, I LOVE the way the animators animated Cat-Ra like an actual cat. Her hair getting puffed up when she's agitated, her ears moving to reflect her mood. Her eyes dilating like how cat eyes actually do. THEY EVEN ALSO MADE HER PURR LIKE AN ACTUAL CAT, LIKE SHE AUDIBLY CAN BE HEARD PURRING. THAT'S SUCH AN ADORABLE DETAIL & IT MAKES HER IMMEDIATLEY ENDEARING AS FUCK.

Also I guess it makes sense Cat-Ra would be into women, yeah?

Because it makes sense that CAT-Ra would be interested in PUSSY.

(Please Laugh) (I'm desperate please think I'm funny I need this)

Now moving on, let me talk about this BITCH.

One. Compared to the original Shadow Weaver, they sure did make her a way more intimidating villain.

Two. FUCK THIS BITCH??????

THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM YOU FUCKING BITCHY, INKBLOT LOOKING, WACKY WAVING TUBE MAN HAIR HAVING, WIZARD-WANNABE MOTHERFUCKER? LITERALLY SHUT UP

+ NO ONE CARES & ALSO YOU SMELL BAD

+ YOU LOOK LIKE A BOOTLEG ERMAC

+ YOU'RE MEAN TO CAT-RA, I MEAN HONESTLY, WHO THE FUCK JUST BULLIES A CAT?

IMAGINE BULLYING A FUCKING CAT. FUCK THIS BITCH.

I DO NOT CARE FOR THIS WOMAN.

HER SMUG AURA MOCKS ME.

Hi so I immediately love you?? Like instantly my favorite character just from the design alone. Glimmer is so real honestly.

I also like Bow, like, Bow is just so fucking cool & nice? He's such a real one, I wanna be best friends with him & hang out he's just so lovable like he's just awesome. I love this man immediately. He deserves all the good in the world actually.

Also holy shit the contrast between Bow in the original show vs this reboot design.

It's funny, the original design WAY more gay than the new one.

The new one that a lot of people (and by people I mean homophobic douchenozzles.) complained about, the design for Bow in this supposedly 'woke tumblr sjw cartoon' has a design that is far less homoerotic in it's design & feel.

The original Bow just outright looks like a fucking gay pornstar.

He's got the trademark 'Gay Porno Mustache™' & everything.

Okay so there's a magic sword or something, etc.

They mentioned Eternia.

Okay so, one of the reasons the original she-ra was lame as fuck compared to He-Man? No Skeletor.

Hordak & literally all the villains in the original show suck ass.

They fucking suck. Hordak is just Skeletor but boring & shitty.

Why the FUCK did they not take the oppurtunity to replace Hordak with Skeletor? You don't even need to add He-Man, I'm fine with that.

But You could have just taken She-Ra & added a better villain because Skeletor fucking rules. He calls people boobs. That's fucking awesome & cool. WHERE IS HE? WHERE THE FUCK IS SKELETOR? LOOK SHOW. HORDAK WAS FUCKING LAME AS FUCK.

SO IF THIS REBOOT IS GOING TO CONVINCE ME THAT HORDAK IS IN ANY WAY A LEGITIMATELY COOL VILLAIN, THEN THEY BETTER FUCKING PULL OUT ALL THE STOPS BECAUSE IT'S GONNA TAKE A LOT TO CONVINCE ME THAT THEY WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF JUST USING SKELETOR INSTEAD. LIKE, YOU BETTER FUCKING IMPRESS ME BECAUSE OTHERWISE, THE LACK OF SKELETOR IS GONNA BE A HUGE FLAW THAT YOU CANNOT OVERLOOK.

I mean, so far they managed to make me actually LIKE Cat-Ra, & the original Cat-Ra fucking sucks. Shadow Weaver sucked & so far at least this reboot Shadow Weaver is actually intimidating. But man, you better fuckin' impress me show, because the lack of Skeletor is felt deep within my soul.

OH wait hold on.

Okay I see why everyone said this show is gay now.

Anyways I didn't mean to ramble on this long about the show in just one episode, I promise this is gonna be a rare occurrence. I think from now on, I'll keep it shortened to just one paragraph per post. I'll only pull out these long posts when I finish a season or something.

Anyways uh:

-Glimmer is the best

-I'm sorry but I'm not over the skeletor thing WHY DID YOU NOT USE HIM HE WAS RIGHT THERE-

[trillscienceofficer]

Imagine if Voyager truly cared about what B'Elanna and Seven wanted, like. once in seven years? For all the screentime Seven gets, it's never about what she wants, just what she has to do in order to fit in better, and B'Elanna... well. She truly gets shit from everyone for no reason whatsoever.

One of the main reasons why I would've love for them to interact more is that, for all their mutual annoyance, somehow they aren't as dismissive with each other as others are with them. Seven is a an arrogant little shit but she apologizes to B'Elanna very frequently when B'Elanna expresses her annoyance, more than most other characters generally do with B'Elanna honestly! And Seven seems to notice pretty quickly when B'Elanna is upset too, which always makes me raise my eyebrows because we're constantly told Seven is not very socially smart... she is though, once she starts learning. B'Elanna in turn only tells Seven to cut it out when she crosses a line and is not at all about giving her a lesson in 'humanity' or whatever.

@nebulouscoffee left some tags that made me think last night:

#on rewatch especially!! I noticed how much the script kept telling me these two hated each other #but they so rarely ever really came off that way? #and even when they did it always felt so... idk Scripted

And I totally agree with this. Voyager to me is a fundamentally unselfaware show, especially when it comes to B'Elanna: we're told things about her by other characters, but those never, ever gel very well with how she acts, how she expresses her feelings, how justified she she is in being irritated when others treat her like anything she says or does is unreasonable. On a lesser degree Seven is also treated that way; constantly, constantly told 'this is how you need to act', 'this is what you need to learn', 'this what it means to be human' and punished every time she's not good at it which is inevitable because literally no one else (except B'Elanna! or maybe Harry, although he is exempt from sexist tropes) is held to the same impossible standards. And Seven tries very hard every time! But of course the show is convinced that she needs to be taken down a peg in order to become 'a real woman' (yikes).

The way the show wants to present B'Elanna and Seven together is always 'look how catty they are with each other (wink wink)', and imho it isn't different from what's going on with them taken singularly. We're told they don't like each other, but what is shown to me is... way more nuanced, especially taking into consideration how they both fit (and not fit) within the ship. In a way, the way they relate to one another is the most honest rapport either of them have on Voyager. They don't really want anything from one another, they aren't thinking about fundamentally changing the other so their lives can be easier (again, when B'Elanna gets annoyed with Seven she only reiterates her own boundaries). Granted the show makes awful jokes at their expense sometimes (“Infinite Regress” and the cold open of “Someone to Watch Over Me” come to mind) but show me a character or a relationship on Voyager who is exempt from this kind of deeply uncomfortable and not actually very funny situation.

I truly believe that exploring this relationship more could have given them some much needed space. Space is a concept I always come back to when I think of B'Elanna and Seven, because I think both of them (especially B'Elanna) needed more of it to be themselves on their own terms for once. And I'm not talking necessarily about minutes of screentime—I'm talking about the writing being less sexist and racist, being less enamored with the idea of conformity, caring about them as characters and not as props in the absurd sexist, idiosyncratic fantasies of a 90s production: even beside Seven's horrible biosuit, B'Elanna is so often 'the girlfriend who doesn't understand what the protagonist is going through and will be insulted onscreen', it makes me genuinely mad!

Obviously I'm not exactly wishing Voyager had actually done it, because again, totally unselfaware writing all the time, but thinking about B'Elanna and Seven interacting always leads me to think about how they could both let each other simply be, even if they would still likely annoy the shit out of each other. And I wouldn't ever want to change that, honestly: willful women deserve to be themselves, that's all.

[tabithatwo]

Do you believe Jackie and Shauna have a codependent relationship in canon? and if you do, who do you think is who in the relationship ("giver"/"taker") dynamic?

i think this is a very interesting and difficult question to parse out, mostly due to the fact that they're teenagers when we see them together. being 18/19 really does mean heightened emotion, less frontal lobe development and therefore less impulse control and ability to moderate our interactions with others, more hormonal imbalance, just a perfect storm of codependency. i say this lovingly, as a lesbian who experienced what its like to be a teenage lesbian and did her fair share of insane shit lol, the type of crazy you can attain as a teenage sapphic is fucking unmatched. there is this deep and unyielding attachment that forms between girls in general at that age and when you add romantic love that spark of crazy easily transitions to a wildfire. i think so many people see themselves in jackie and shauna because it is a more shared experience than we like to admit and the show fucking nails it.

when you're in it, you think that you're the only one feeling that sort of intense obsessive consuming need for a person. often you don't see that the other person wants and needs you just as deeply, because we all do our best to hide what we know isn't acceptable. and its true. that sort of desperation isn't healthy at all. we should all strive to be more comfortable in ourselves and to stop putting all our happiness (not just happiness really, because when you're consumed by someone like that every emotion hinges on them) into external factors, especially one person. but learning to do that is a process. we don't come out ready to do that. it takes time and development and independence that you can't achieve when you're that young.

then we get older and we're embarrassed when we look back on those behaviors. we shove them down and pretend they didn't happen as best we can and we definitely avoid talking about them with other people. i can't tell you the amount of times a rush of just total abject horror at how obsessed i was with my high school best friend, turned homoerotic nightmare, turned girlfriend, turned ex hit me in my mid twenties. like your brain starts kicking in and you just go GOOD GOD!!! what was i THINKING??? but more years pass and time makes the sting of things lighter and now i can talk to her and sometimes (sometimes!) we can broach the really fucking deranged things we did and thought and its weirdly healing and horrifying all at once.

now, idk if you're still with me because that was a long intro that didn't even touch on the topic yet, but i promise i'm getting somewhere:

i think that jackie and shauna are fully and completely dependent on each other. i don't think that there is one giver and one taker. i think that they are a beautiful and tragic example of the crazy obsessive entangled love that happens between young sapphics. for me, watching them and discussing them and writing them is so freeing, because it allows me to actually face the harsh realities of unhealthy dependence.

neither of them could ever be whole without the other. and i don't mean that in a romantic hyperbole-fueled manner. i mean that in a truly horrifying way. i mean that to them functionally, they are girls who have body parts as real as any other, that are unattached from their nervous system. jackie's arms are shauna's arms and shauna's arms are jackie's arms. each girl has two hands that touch and do and create and destroy, without her brain giving the okay. each girl has to watch, as an extension of herself does something that she would never ever allow. when they're apart, when they're fighting and hurting, when shauna goes to sleep in the attic, its as though their lungs and their hearts are in another room.

who gives and who takes is hard to answer in specifics, though the simple answer is both for each. but the best way i can put it is that jackie gives more and more in the tangible real world. she tries to anticipate shauna's every need. she gives her the last bite of food. she gives her everything she has and then some, because jackie's biggest fear is shauna taking a seam-cutter to all the parts of them that are sewn together and becoming a separate entity. jackie squeezes shauna tight in her hands and shauna gives more pieces of her body and soul to their shared cache than she wants to.

shauna has an image of freeing herself from the dependency, but she doesn't like to reckon with herself and she doesn't like to see all the places that she expects jackie to be an extension of herself. so when she tries to make space, shauna doesn't even realize that she's not separating them at all. she's touching where jackie touches and kissing where jackie kisses. she is trying to be jackie, but not truly in a jealously way. not in a way that undermines their romantic love. shauna is trying to be jackie in a way that intensifies their dependence, because even if consciously shauna is aging and trying to forge a path for herself with a new school and a new life, like most of us tend to try and do at that age, shauna is still subconsciously trying to fuse them into one being.

and when jackie dies, shauna absorbs her. because she can be both. she's been practicing for this her entire life.

[the-s1lly-corner]

spot that meets a autistic reader, that is talkative to themselves, but has poor social skills because (lack of good parenting + bullys, but is very smart and loves art and engineering, and dreams to be a scientist one day.. it could began as the reader first feared him over an awkward moment? to opening up about themselves and the reader's obsessive fascination over him. two very talented ppl that only wants to be appreciated, respected and loved...💔

idk is it to much?? bruh I'm trying to be creative😭 I'd be happy with whatever happens!. aNd TaKe yO tiME!! On irl things and beloved spotty <3

Spot w/ an autistic reader!

Rubs my autistic little hands

Feeling a lil drowsy but I wanna chuck this out before I fall asleep for (possibly) the next 7 hours :3

Not proof read we die like Peter Parker <\\3 we are sleepy and tumblr wont let me save drafts for asks <\3

Obligatory "I like this character so I'm hcing him to be ND like me" touch

He gets it

Anyways

I think to help make the whole thing less jarring, or whatever, is that you may have known each other vaguely before the collider incident

You weren't a scientist at alchemax, more like.

Well shoot I just forgot the term but like, you work there, but you dont do hands on experiments, not experienced enough yet

Intern?

Maybe, idk

Obviously you don't work there anymore after the collider blowing up, so... you're looking for a new job

You knew about Jonathan, but you weren't friends

You had also heard rumors about what happened to him but you kinda dismissed it as cruel rumors surrounding his death.. I mean no one could've survived that explosion.. right?

So imagine your surprise when you end up almost getting robbed by spot

Can you blame him? He hasnt found another job since the accident and hes probably living off of pity handouts; likely homeless

Now hand over the wallet!!/j

No but on the semi likely chance that you manage to defuse the situation, given Spot sucks as a criminal, you just bluntly ask if the whole

Rumor thing is true

I mean obviously it is but confirmation is important

After a few more chance encounters, you guys both finally decide to properly sit down and talk

Its tense and awkward at first since 1. How does one even act around someone like spot? He's vulnerable but also trying to do the whole. Revenge thing... And 2. Hes desperate for human interaction and it SHOWS, it's almost uncomfortable actually

But you both trudge past it and make it work

One meet up turns into two then three; then you discover how much hes struggling and

Now you're roomates

Oh my god they were roommates/ref

Anyways, that's the set up!! It kinda felt wrong to just. Jump into it without some explanation on how yall end up in the same area consistently

Doesnt mind that you mumble to yourself, he probably does the same thing. From muttering things to keep his train of thought to having a personal monologue, I wholeheartedly believe he does the same thing

Hs understands how it feels to be. Not treated very good, he likely wasnt the most respected in alchemax so it's not uncommon for the two of you to have vent sessions where you both let it all out

You ask him about his journey to becoming a scientist and not so subtly ask for advice on how to get into the field; and touching onto the whole human interaction thing, hes more than willing to talk your ear off about his entire career history

On the chance you dont want to do physics stuff, and you wanna do another branch of science he's all ears on listening to you ramble, may even lend a hand in getting you to where you need to be career wise

Yall do at home experiments as bonding stuff

Look if spot can make a mini collider in some building then I can only imagine the type of shit yall get up to at home

Oh? You're still curious about.. him? Of all things, him?

He never thought anyone would look at him with interest; usually its disgust or fear, or both

Hes hesitant at first because what if you discover something that'll totally change your view of him?

Takes (some, a little) coaxing

Bro caves fast, he misses physical touch

"So like, these holes-" you proceed to just. Dip your entire fist into a hole and watch said fist pop out from another hole

The demons are telling me to make reader like

Make it a game to try to throw stuff through his holes but I feel like that would be really mean, no one likes stuff getting thrown at them

Please dont throw stuff through his holes :(

Random but like

Idk if this happens with yall but

If someone stims do yall. Like stim back

Like I have vocal stims and mess with my hands; and sometimes my friend will be prompted to stim if I stim??

Idk but yall do that

OHOH before I post this if you're both comfy with physical touch please please please hold him, it's been so so long since someone has hugged him and he really really needs it :(

[justalilpearlie]

!! Intro !! (updated)

Hello everyone, my name is PearlescentMoon

Hihi! I'm Pearl! Magic is quite a fine name aswell. Although I'm a man of many names ;)

I am a minor, my gender labels are gendervoid verinix, tho I also ID as bigender and ftm (fem presenting tho! not transmasc, just trans man)! I'm queer, leaning on mlm, tho I also like girls here and there.

I go by He/Xe. I can She/Her myself + close friends/mutuals are allowed, but refrain from doing so without explicit permision please. (I also use neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)

I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.

I'm autistic and I have ADHD aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)

- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -

I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), c!Magic(outsmp+psmp), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)

I like to stream, roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are the Outsiders SMP, The Hatchetfield Musicals, Life Series and Empires 1.

I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any mediamates!! Specially from Outsiders <3

Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!

- -💥-🐺-🌙- -❤️- -💛- -✨-💥-✨- -💛- -❤️- -🌙-🐺-💥- -

DNI prefferably:

- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)

- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.

- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.

- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much

CCs I'd rather if you didn't interact, but if you shall do so anyways, do so at your own risk, you've been warned. /lh

- -🪸-🐸-🌙- -💙- -🩵- -✨-🪸-✨- -🩵- -💙- -🌙-🐸-🪸- -

"Disclaimer"

- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao. COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref

- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp outsiders/life series/empires/fnaf u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.

- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.

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Special People Mentions!! fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)

Family! <3 🌼 @pehpurr* SISTER!! YOU'RE AMAZING, DAISY. SO SO GREAT. YOUR ART IS INCREDIBLE, YOU ARE SO PASSIONATE ABOUT EVERYTHING YOU DO, YOU ARE SO VERY CARING FOR OTHERS, SO KIND AND TALENTED, A GREAT WRITER AND THE BEST BEST SISTER I COULD EVER ASK FOR!! Scar, you changed my life, you were there for me when I needed you the most, I know you ALWAYS have my back. You're kind to me even when the world isn't, and know that even if we fight or if you do things I disagree with (ehem forgiving too much ppl /lht), I will never leave you, and I will never stop coming after you. I love you, Kanna. You're the best Peeps, keep it up, for you're a beacon of hope in everyone's lives. I'm so proud. ♡ ⚙️ @gentlexmadman DAD!! I FREAKING LOVE YOU DAD OMG!! I am SO very happy we got to spend our first fathers day together even if just a little, you made this the first year I was actually happy to celebrate it, looking forward to it and making a gift of my own :) Im so so happy to have you in my life. You are, likewise to Pepper, an AMAZING artist, so much detail, just so awesome in general. I love hearing all your silly stories about work and the people you know, old man. Thank you for being with me, papá, I never thought I'd actually find you again. Thank you so so very much. ♡

🐸 @bigb-enthusiast SIBLING!! MY SIBLING IN ZAYA OH MY GOODNESS IS THAT USER BIGB ENTHUSIAST?? YES IT SURE IS!! Bro I could listen to ur analysis and rambles til the end of the world u got the best ideas ever wtf!!?? Ur very freakin insane but also ur my best buddy, my nosey neighbor for life!! I appreciate u a lot, Bee, my favorite insane asylum escapee ♡

🔪 @skywardspecter OECAAAAA HEY ZACH ILYSM BROTHER!! YOUR ROLEPLAY AND WRITINGS ARE AAAAA-MAZE-ING !! I RLLY WANNA MEET U IRL!! UR SO GOOD AT ROLEPLAY AND ART, YOU'RE SO CREATIVE AND BRIGHT UR LIKE A BALL OF SUNSHINE!! U PUT UP W A LOT RUNNING SM SERVERS BUT U ALWAYS GET BACK UP AND I THINK THATS ADMIRABLE!! AND IDK VIANS TUMBLR BUT SHOT OUT TO VIAN AND ORCA TOO !! VIANS SUCH A GREAT SUPPORTIVE FRIEND FR NO MATTER WHAT AND ORCA IS SUCH A KIND AND FUNNY GUY, VERY UNDERSTANDING <33 I LOVE U GUYS!! U MAKE ME FEEL SAFE, LIVE LAUGH LOVE MAGIC MAZE ♡

🥣 @rennyus SOUP OMGGG HAI SIBLIIIING ILYSM !!! GGHHH YOU. YOU ARE SO GREAT AND PATIENT WITH ME, YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEED YOU AND YOU'VE NEVER EVER JUDGED ME FOR ANYTHING!! I LOOOOVE HEARING ABT UR MEMORIES THEYRE ALWAYS SO SO SWEET <33 I RLLY HOPE U FIND UR WIVES SOMEDAY CAUSE ALL I WANT IS TO SEE U HAPPY SIB ♡

🐟 Aussi, MY AMAZING COUSIN OMG?? IDK UR USER HERE BUT!! WE'VE BEEN THRU SOOO SO MUCH TOGETHER, EVEN WITH THE PERIODS WE DONT TALK MUCH IN, I LOOOOVE GETTING INTO THINGS U LIKE OR WHEN U TAKE THE TIME TO GET INTO THE STUFF I ENJOY TOO!!! UR FRIENDS ARE ALSO VERY SILLY N I LOVE PLAYIN PHASMO WITH YALL! I LOOOVE ALL THE MEMORIES WE SHARE TOGETHER AND THESE TWO YEARS OF COUSINSHIP HAVE BEEN AMAZING!! TO MANY MANY MORE YEARS COUSIN!! LOVE YOU TONS ♡

Simply special <3 ☕ @insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love every second we spend together. I love seeing yall thrive. I love your insane yet endearing behavior. You might be a bit unhinged sometimes, and admittedly not the healthiest person when it comes to your schedules, but I'm just so proud of everything you create and accomplish. I hope you get to accomplish all your dreams, and I hope I can be here to see that happen, if you let me :)! For many years more, cause I'm just oh so glad I met you. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world. 🍊 Jack***, Oh my dearest, where do I even begin with you, sport... you trully are my soulmate, my other half... mi media naranja, if you will, heh.. Every second I get to spend with you is like heaven, no matter whats going on, I know everything will be alright cause I have you. You mean absolutely everything to me, my Hero, I know you'll always be there for me. You are the sweetest man I've ever met, and I'm so proud of the person you've become. If I had to choose between you or the world I'd choose you 10 times over, and I can say surely, that you'd do the same. I love every single detail about you, thank you for being so patient with me, you're wonderful, cielo. I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and stupidness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. ♡

Friends! 🏜️ @thecranewivesrpf My right hand man!! OMG we havent talked in a WHILE but ILYSM !!! MY SECOND IN COMMAND IN THE MAJORMOON SERVER FRFR!! WE SHOULD TALK AGAIN, I MISS U POOKIE </3

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(More TBA)

That's it for now folks, love yall and see you around!

[ghost-of-a-system]

Asking about fronting / awareness / existing in Innerworld, how you percieve that, how others might if they see this, idk. (not dx, questioning at "ok there is apparently *something* idk how to comprehend it, so my perception / understanding / the concepts i'm fitting these experiences into might be wrong. but it is not nothing. and dissociation and trauma is medically dx sooo." but like i don't want to fakeclaim.) I see systems / alters talking about being in the headspace, living there, interacting, like they have their own consciousness, going to sleep there or doing activities. And I'm like - how - howwwww how are you that real and separate and alive For me it is more like there's the front room with a big control / signal board and whoever is at these controls is the current I. there's like that omniscient consciousness that is just linked to that front room. and i (?) sometimes see pictures of it or of other Alters, i hear their voices, sometimes we can interact. but conscious I = whoever is at the controls more or less. there'll be intrusions and fragments from elsewhere / others that i might be able to identify as "probably from xy" but not a real other I that exists and is able to think and have its own consciousness??? I think? So how do you do that shift from a collective consciousness to being separate? and like being real and thoughts and feelings and actions *existing* when they arent perceived through that front? Is this even how systems work / would I be a system if it's like that? is this collective PoV just actually all 1 personality that is changing wildly and only the intrusions are a different thing from that? is it all just me and I need to get my shit together and stop imagining stuff? i'm so confused by all this (reminder i'm as far as "there is something complex dissociative going on i guess??" - and that after said brain threatened revolution and unaliving us if we didn't stop denying their existence which uh pretty hard to argue with) honestly i'm amazed i can even type this without getting a strike i think this is the first time i've ever used we this much in a public space and was even thinking about signing off - midi / keeper / plus whoever the mini was in the middle there. also a bunch of others maybe somewhere around too, basically almost everyone who was distinct enough to get a name i guess somehow. but mainly those. ...a bit of time has passed and uh wtf howww what did you do brain?! and i feel obligated to add that this is all just in my head and i might as well have imagined / been crazy like I don't wanna appropriate anything ...more time has passed and I added this & cut out like 4000 words of further rambling: Idk I really hope this makes sense, if not please ask and I'll try to explain further! Also hope this was okay to ask, I really was trying to be respectful and stuff, you don't have to answer!

I feel that what you are describing could very well be perceived as a system one. Of course, the disclaimer... we are no professionals. But, if I am understanding this properly, we relate to feeling as though we are one consciousness, almost... cycling through different identities rather than (metaphorically) individual consciousnesses taking turns with control. At the end of the day, we are all one brain, I suppose! If you are a system, the most I could chalk this up to is simply being a matter of how your individual system functions. It isn't always the same down to the little details as someone else's, and it is all about what your brain needs.

We cannot answer on behalf of systems with complex headspaces, or inner-worlds, in which their alters can manifest and experience fleshed-out lives. We have no inner-world, and have never been able to experience this (Despite attempts). But, I do not believe that the presence of this is required for alters to be considered "more separate", or distinct. We have fairly distinct alters despite having no inner-world, no fronting room, and nothing of the sort. What makes us so distinct is who we are when we are here. But that is just our experience.

We are no inner-world professionals; we hardly understand the ability to visualize in itself! Having aphantasia, and all. It may be better to ask a system who is more experienced with these things. But I will try. You mention wondering how to shift this one consciousness into being more separated, and I'm afraid I do not know if this is possible or something that someone can achieve. Perhaps we are uninformed, in which case I do hope that someone corrects us. I do recall reading about how inner-worlds can be constructed and expanded, if that was something you feel you are interested in, or something you feel could help. After all, inner worlds are visualization tools to help with communication, at the basics. I believe that this is generally achieved through therapy, though I'm sure it isn't required. You can probably try to look more into that online and see if anything helps.

This is the most I feel comfortable suggesting. I do not want to speak too much for something we do not experience.

Feel free to reach out if we misunderstood or should expand upon anything.