#if I change my mind and decide i'll write for those fandoms i'll maybe make a list of characters i won't write for in my rules

[halfmoth-halfman]

Leaving this blog.

With my mini-series finishing up soon, I've decided to leave this blog as well as my AO3 account once it’s finished. This is not a decision I've made lightly, but circumstances have left this a place where I no longer feel safe.

As of now, I won't be deactivating this blog and will be leaving my fics up for anyone who'd still like to read them. I can't say this decision won't change later, but right now I feel that I've put too much work into this blog to simple delete it.

Below the cut is an explanation of why I'm making this decision, and what has been happening on this blog since the end of last year. It's not required to read or anything to understand the gist of this post; it's simply for my own peace of mind knowing that I spoke up about it. There will be topics that are possibly triggering such as harassment, threats, and racism so please mind the warnings and tags.

The mini-series is queued to finish next week, but there will be no more fic polls or wip wednesdays. I'll still be on here to make sure the queue does its job, and maybe post some stuff from my old drafts as a last bit of fun.

I'll have dms tentatively open for the next two-ish weeks for those who'd like to follow my new account, however I will not be answering anything from empty blogs. After that, asks and dms will be turned off, and I won't be coming back to this blog very often, if at all.

I cannot say thank you enough to the wonderful readers I've had and the amazing people I've met. I don't think I would've ever continued writing without your support and friendship. There's nothing I can do to show my appreciation for all of you.

Maybe we'll see each other again. If not, I hope your inspiration is always flowing, and 2024 treats you kindly.

Mothie 💜

Again, TW: rape/death threats, violent racism, repeated harassment, and mental health.

Back in November, I started getting rude, mean-spirited anons. It wasn't anything I was too bothered with because it didn't happen often and, honestly, my inbox gets flooded for a week or so anytime I post about certain topics. I blocked, deleted, reported and moved on thinking whoever it was would get bored and leave.

However, what started as a few rude anons calling me a bitch or stupid turned into a lot of anons being vile and racist which only worsened over the next few months.

I spoke about it in this post (link) near the end of November. In that post, I mentioned that those were the nicer asks and that was not an exaggeration. I have gotten my fair share of shitty anons as seen here (link) when I had to take a break from my blog because of said anons, but I have never gotten the amount of vitriol that I saw in these asks.

When I turned anon off, I started getting even worse messages from empty blogs that would either be blocked or deactivate within a week. When I turned my askbox off, I started getting hateful DMs. When I turned DMs off, it jumped from Tumblr to my other social medias which I had to private, completely avoid, or outright delete.

I got messages attacking my writing, calling me slurs, threatening to find me and rape or kill me, sending me explicit porn and rape videos while insulting my sexuality, and going into gross detail about how much people I interacted with hated me or how I would never be as good as them. I tried to power through it, pretending everything was fine while I pulled away from this blog, from writing, from friends that I loved and talked to every day. Everything about this blog, the fandoms I enjoyed, the people I talked to, made me so anxious because of these constant messages.

I took several breaks while dealing with this in therapy, repeatedly trying to come back and get comfortable on this blog, but within a few days of coming back the messages would start up again, either here or on any of my social medias I tried to unprivate, and I couldn't deal with it.

Only in the last week or two has it started to slow down and stop on a few of my other socials, which is the only reason I even feel comfortable making this post. However, in regards to this blog and my feelings toward it, the damage is done.

I don't think I can ever truly convey how isolating this has been. So many of these messages were about how I've spoken about my struggles as a black woman in fandom, how much of a burden it puts on the people who interact with me, how inferior I am to them and that I am everything that's wrong with fandom.

I felt scared and anxious to talk to anyone about this, especially people mentioned in those messages, out of fear that this harassment would jump to them. There are friendships that I stepped away from that I will never get back because of that. There are friends that I've felt like I was betraying by never telling them about what was happening because I felt too ashamed about letting this get to me.

I constantly worried that making a post like this would feel like, "Oh, Mothie's whining and trauma-dumping into the void about fandom racism again", that those messages would be right and it would force people to feel like they had to support me. Or worse, that people would agree and it would only make things worse. I've wrestled with so much guilt trying to decide to make this post and figure out what to do to make me trust myself again.

Ultimately, I don't think I was wrong for talking about my issues in fandom, and I don't think anything I've said has warranted this kind of harassment. I don’t know the who’s or why’s behind of this, but I've come to terms with the fact that I'll never really know. Truthfully, I'm not sure it even matters at this point. In the end, I think moving on from this blog entirely would be the best thing for me right now.

But, man, does it fucking suck.

This was the blog where I felt comfortable enough to start writing again, to start posting my fics. It's the blog where I met so many friends, got the courage to join new communities, found new hobbies, new music, new things to enjoy in life. It feels silly to say about a blog, but this was a place where I felt like I was able to carve out a space for myself. I put so much work into making it my own, and now the only thing I feel about it is anxious.

Hate messages and threats and racism have always been a part of fandom, and the internet as a whole. I’ve known since I started participating in fandom spaces that it was going to and continue to happen. I've known that I had to have a tough skin, especially if I ever spoke up about problems I faced because no one was going to have my back if I didn't have my own. I thought I had learned how to deal with it, and how to make a safe space for myself. But this goes beyond that. I did not deserve this. No one deserves this.

In some ways, it feels like admitting defeat, like I'm weak or hypocritical for not being as strong as I pretended I was and leaving. In other ways, it feels freeing to start over, and I'm choosing to view look at this optimistically even if it bittersweet. I don't want to let this scare me away from writing or from speaking about things that are important to me. All I can do now is say I'm so incredibly sorry to those I've hurt by stepping away or keeping this secret, and make sure I'm able to at least leave this blog on as happy a note as I can have.

[elvisabutler]

good girls clean up their messes

summary: austin didn't used to have a housewife kink and neither did you. funny how life-uh- finds a way to change that. fandom: austin butler rating: m pairing: austin butler x female reader word count: 2100 warnings: housewife kink. unprotected p in v ( though can be read as committed relationship birth control situation ). cleaning kink? minor breeding kink. praise kink. brief mention of the pandemic and how austin was a recluse for a bit. author's note: welcome to day 25 of kinktober, housewife kink with austin butler. this was fun. truly i'd actually have written more but i had this view of cleaning in my head vs anything else. so honestly, anyone asks and i'll write a whole big long thing about it but for now, enjoy this little tiny thing. also thank you @pennyroyalcreep for being the one to ask for this. i had hoped someone would choose austin for this kink vs anyone else so i was pleased as punch about it when you did.

You were never made to be a housewife, you've told Austin this on more than one occasion. Even when you first met him and were first talking to him, you told him that despite how perhaps you looked it, all warm and inviting, it wasn't your sort of style. Life had a funny way of changing those things sometimes. It started out slow, after all you were the one with a faintly normal nine to five-ish job, he was the one who had to jet across the world half the time. It made sense that you would keep where you were living and he at least- stopped by clean. You weren't a heathen, you knew how to make your house look presentable. The first time Austin had come back from being away for a while was the Elvis press tour and he had been expecting to see the house in some sort of disarray, maybe you hadn't been keeping up with the laundry or maybe their were dishes piled up in the sink. Instead, what greeted him was his girlfriend- the woman he fell in love with when the world went to shit, he became a goddamn recluse for six months, and everyone had let things fall by the wayside- in her pjs doing the dishes with these stupid little green gloves that in your own words- "kept me from getting dirty while cleaning".

All Austin could think about when he saw you that way is making you as dirty as he could. His teeth bit at his lower lip, picturing you taking off those gloves, making a show of it as he just sank to his knees and showed you just how much he appreciated your effort to keep the place clean. In fact, that had been what he decided to do the moment he wrapped his arms around your waist and you had let out a small gasp at his clothed erection.

It got worse after that, with him finding every excuse to just watch you clean and you finding that you didn't mind. You wanted to show Austin how you could keep things going, wanted his praise telling you how good you were, how he had the best girlfriend that he'll marry when he gets just a minute to himself. How you made everything so clean only for him to dirty it up with you. How you clean up the kitchen when the two of you cook knowing fully well he wants to have his dessert on the table, spread out on the tablecloth, chasing your pleasure higher and higher until he has to suck on your clit just so in a way that has you almost breaking the table when you come back down to Earth with a thump.

Bikeriders is- complicated when it comes to him coming home and you hate it, it's led to you having to show him FaceTime videos of the clean bedroom and the dishes and him forcing them to let him take a break because he just wants to eat dinner with his girlfriend. It's led to praise being over text and over the phone with him stroking his cock and you curling your own fingers inside yourself or using that one vibrator Austin hates. You miss him and he misses you just as much if his moans are anything to go by, if his grunts and whispers of your name are anything to go by.

It's a Saturday and you find that there's more than a bit more dust in the house than you'd like, that and you've let the glass door leading out to the backyard remain a little too dirty for your liking. Austin had mentioned the possibility of being able to fly in for the weekend, something about an award or a round table discussion but he hadn't told you when he'd be coming in. You take a chance on him coming in early, choosing to be a little silly and wear a French maid costume you had bought for yourself last Halloween and turn on your cleaning playlist, allowing the mix of electroswing, rock and jazz fly through the air as you got started on your efforts. The door is easy enough, done in about thirty minutes and left to settle before you would go back and see if you missed any spots. Now came the hard part, the dusting that usually would have you sniffling by the end of it but you hoped it would be different this time.

Your wish is granted, just not in the way you planned for it as Austin opens the door to the house and walks in only to find you bent over, no underwear under the costume you're wearing and he has to bite his lip to swallow the groan that threatens to escape him at the image and the knowledge. He knows perfectly well how engrossed you get in your music when you're cleaning, having once snuck up on you and swayed to the beat of the music for what felt like ten minutes- it was only five- before you realized his presence and had abandoned your task. You're near the window you had just cleaned, dusting the bottom part of an end table nearby and Austin drops his bags quietly, allowing himself to sneak up on you until you feel his hands grip your hips. The gasp that leaves you is closer to the breath leaving your body, especially as Austin uses his grip to pull you into a standing position, feeling just how hard you've already made him.

"Hey baby." He murmurs into your ear, kissing the side of your neck and nipping at your earlobe. "No panties and you're dusting in this. You love painting such a pretty picture for me, don't you?"

The voice you have, the one that normally snarks at him leaves your head right in that exact moment knowing fully well you need to use it. Your answer is predictable because of it. "I have to make sure my hardworking man comes home to a nice clean house." You swallow and shake your head a little, ignoring how Austin's hands are sliding up your torso, making their way to your chest. "I've seen how messy his hotel rooms can get."

His laugh vibrates against your back and the noise slips into one ear only to settle in your brain, you missed hearing that laugh in person. "Low blow. Valid, but is that any way to treat me after all this time?"

A giggle leaves your mouth unprompted as you try and focus on dusting once more. "Yeah, maybe just a little."

He hums as an answer to your sass, cupping your breasts as he grinds against you slowly. "Want to fuck you, baby. Want to make a mess of you while you clean."

Your breath quickens just slightly as you grind back against him, allowing you to feel the roughness of the fabric of his pants against your bare ass before you pull away, smoothing down your skirt. "I've still got to dust around the door, Austin."

The noise that comes out of him when you moves sounds like a growl as he pulls you against him again. When he speaks it comes out almost as a whine. "I can just flip up that skirt while you're dusting, baby. Promise I won't make you smudge the nice clean window with your body. Just want to fuck you against the door."

You know your neighbors can likely see what Austin's doing, see how he's slowly pinning you against the door, the front of your body pressed against the cool glass, giving you some relief from how hot just having Austin pressed against you is making you feel. Your answer comes out in a pant.

"Fine. Just, you're doing the top of the door, you tree."

Austin would have laughed at you calling him a tree if he wasn't so distracted with undoing his pants and pulling down his boxers as he flipped up the skirt, exposing your now wet core to the air of the room. Unbidden, a small keen escapes your mouth as he pushes into you without warning. It's not unwelcome, but you hadn't expected him to go all in immediately. Your ass grinds backwards against him as you brace yourself against the door.

"Fuck. So fucking wet for me. You're- Perfect. That's- Got the best girlfriend, cleaning my house, cleaning the dishes, wearing outfits like this. Didn't even have this kink before but god." His words are punctuated by his thrusts, each one causing you to thump against the glass. "My pretty little housewife, doesn't even need to cook but she does. Doesn't need to do all of this but you do this just for me. You going to keep doing it? When I marry you do I get to keep this little housewife?"

"Not a housewife, Aus." You huff out a laugh, focusing on the noises of his cock entering and exiting you, it sounds like there's so much fluid that you swear you'd be surprised if there's not a puddle below your feet when you're done. "Still got my job."

"Doesn't make you any less of one." He growls against the shell of your ear, his hands dipping in between the fabric of the outfit and your skin to squeeze your breast and then your nipple. "You're gonna be my housewife, aren't you? Even when we get married you'll keep the house clean. Even when I give you a baby, you'll do it, won't you."

Your cunt clenches around him at the last part, causing embarrassment to flood your system as he chuckles. "Full of my kid, cleaning my house, making food, being such a good girl. My gorgeous housewife, my fantastic housewife that I don't deserve."

If your head starts to roll back against his shoulder, neither one of you comment on it, instead Austin uses it as a chance to kiss your neck, nipping at it occasionally as he keeps thrusting into you, stealing your breath when he hits just the right angle. One of your hands drifts toward your clit, trying to see if you can come before Austin swats it out of the way.

"No, let me take care of that. Don't want to get that pretty pussy all dirty with dust. Let me reward you, baby." He whispers as he moves to rub it, allowing you to gasp at the sensation. You can see smudges forming from your hands, from your breasts, from your skin against the glass and you find you don't mind just this once. Instead you allow yourself to grind against, his fingers, his ass, just allow yourself to move in whatever way you can to chase your high. Austin's hips are starting to stutter, his thrusts become a little erratic as he feels himself about to come before he pinches your clit in a way that should be painful but has you hitting your head against the glass door lightly, your cunt clenching around his cock, milking it as he comes with a groan against your neck. You stay like that for a few minutes, both of your legs too shaky to move before he pulls out of you, earning a mild sob of distress from your throat.

He turns you around to let himself kiss you, his thigh moving to between your legs just in case you want to rock against it. You do just slightly before you speak. "You made me smudge the glass."

Austin's laugh and smile fill the whole room with sunlight you didn't realize just how much you were missing until that exact moment. He shrugs. "I did, didn't I? Guess I'll just have to watch you clean it again. Oh no, what a tragedy."

You smack him lightly with the duster and point to the top of the door. "Laugh it up, Aus. Do that and I'll think about it."

He moves his thigh, allowing his knee to press against your clit. "My perfect little housewife isn't going to stand for that dirt. I'm getting to watch it."

It's then that you finally move his thigh back, allowing you to walk away from him, hips swaying just so as you walk to pick up the glass cleaner from the floor, exposing your cunt leaking his cum to him. "Maybe. Depends on how nice your housewife is feeling. Get to cleaning, Aus. The clock is ticking."

You both forget about cleaning about fifteen minutes in. Oh well, there was always tomorrow.

[pfhwrittes]

Actually I know you said I wouldn’t wanna hear you bemoan your writing process, but I’m actually very interested in that tbh

What is your process for a longer fic? How do you format your outline? What does your research look like if you need to do that?

I’d love to see it! Maybe this is more of Talk Shop Tuesday question lol

tats you can have a little Talk Shop Tuesday as a treat!

so i briefly touched on my process (god i need a new way to phrase that it sounds so wanky) in this ask here where i admitted to kind of flying by the seat of my trousers/pants with writing ("live by the PWP sword, die by the PWP sword i guess" is probably one of my favourite sentences i've ever written).

but i'll expand further under the cut because i know i'm going to get long winded as hell.

firstly, i'm going to admit something slightly embarrassing. i'm not a planner, or a plotter, or a think further than the scene i'm writing writer. i'm just not. i write entirely on vibes or wherever the worms take me. i think that's pretty evident from the fact that most of my fics/drabbles for the fandom are shorter than my left leg. i consider it to be a minor miracle if i break 500 words, never mind 1000 words for my fics.

secondly, maybe mummies is my most rigidly outlined fic ever. i have a super rough outline for my festival fic (remember that? god those were the days) and for my bbc ghosts inspired thing (again, another blast from the past right there) but maybe mummies is the biggest document i have in my WIP folder right now and i'll use that as my example for my outlining process (and hopefully i won't spoil the fic too much).

What is your process for a longer fic? i always start every single one of my fics by dumping a synopsis of what i want the fic to be at the top of my document. first of all, it scares away the Fear of the Dreaded Blank Page (where The Blinking Cursor of Doom lingers), secondly it pulls me back on track when i start getting lost in the weeds as i always get lost in the weeds to some degree. thirdly, it's kind of silly and mostly vibes. i basically just talk to myself in the blurb and at some point that may translate to an author's note but sometimes it doesn't.

then i move onto notable tags i know i need to include. so that would be the general vibe of the fic ("Inspired by The Mummy (1999)"), the genre ("Action/Adventure", "Romance", "Comedy"), or notable triggers ("Bugs/Beetles", "Implied PTSD", "Implied Alcoholism"). the notable tag section is subject to change as i write but as soon as i pop something in my fic that i know could potentially trigger someone or make someone balk at bit at reading it, i update the tag list. as i work through the sections/scenes of my fic i list the tags/triggers that apply to that section and mark them with a star and match that star up to the notable tag section.

for maybe mummies, i started writing it chronologically while on my third(?) rewatch of The Mummy. i spat out the blurb during my first watch because the brain worms took me gently by my throat and calmly threatened me at knife point (no, i don't know where they got the knife either and at this point i'm too afraid to ask). then i yelled at @391780 over having an idea as i usually do and early enabled me like the Chief Worm Wrangler they are.

then i got bored of writing it chronologically on my fifth rewatch after blocking most of act 1 and act 2, so i went to the last scene of the fic, blocked that out with bullet points (and made myself laugh) before deciding that actually, an epilogue would really tie everything up wonderfully. so then i spat out the epilogue (and very shyly asked @syoddeye if the emotional beats hit right and they were kind enough to go "i love [this metaphor] and [this interaction]" which basically cemented the epilogue for me. so if you hate it, don't you dare blame sy, i'll come for your kneecaps with my makita drill if you do).

aside from that, i block everything roughly using bullet points. sometimes that's a badly worded sentence, sometimes that's a particular dialogue exchange that fits, sometimes thats just [JP and F!RC bicker] (anything in parentheses gets filled with more detail in at a later date), sometimes the worms wriggle and i spit out an entire scene.

if i'm struggling to write a scene i tend to either leave myself bullet points or break the scene into smaller chunks. it helps my brain to focus on the parts i want it to write better that way and it takes the pressure off so i don't get stuck in the mire of "oh god this needs to be the most perfect first draft that has ever existed".

How do you format your outline? so my heavily redacted outline for maybe mummies looks something like this:

Blurb (stream of consciousness babble/vibes/silliness)

Title (currently blank)

Notable Tags (all the current tags/triggers, and there are 23 currently!)

Characters notes - John "Johnny" MacTavish - Female! Reader Character (RC) - Captain John Price - Simon "The Ghost/Ghost" Riley - Kyle Garrick - Philip Graves (then some redacted characters)

Act One (the set up) - Scene 1 - Scene 2 - Scene 3 - Scene 4

Act Two (the rising action) - Scene 1, part a - Scene 1, part b - Scene 1, part c. (etc, etc. you get the idea)

Act Three (the crisis) (see act two and three for how that would look)

Act Four (the resolution) (heavily redacted bits go here) - Final Scene

Epilogue (this i have written out in full, but i can't share it with you because of spoilers).

Odds and Ends (this is where chunks of dialogue i want to add into the fic, or interactions i want to go live until they find a place in the fic. it's also where the parts i've "scrapped" go too. i never delete anything from my outline, it just gets moved to the odds and ends section).

What does your research look like if you need to do that? oooooh boy. okay, another embarrassing admission coming up. my research for maybe mummies has been my nigh on continuous rewatching of The Mummy. i'm on 13.5 watches right now (10 before my surgery date, 3 post surgery, and one time i started watching it and fell asleep about half way through while my brain was slowly stewing in the remnants of morphine and codeine). other than that, i've got about 5 or 6 tabs that i've shoved into a folder in firefox dutifully labeled "shit i don't know about 1920s eygpt".

in short, my research is more of a mess than my outline.

hopefully this answers your question and i'm so sorry i made you slog through what is essentially 1.1k of words that may be nonsense.

[theonethatyaks93]

Sketch Showcase Time!!!

Sooooooooo, these are days two and three of my "Learning How-To Draw Pinky and Brain Phase." And, y'all, I think I found my groove! This is attempt 2 of drawing Pinky:

Already, I'm very pleased with this. I mean, this was my attempt to re-create Pinky's design by @goosieboosie. I'm not a digital artist, so I couldn't capture all the majesty of this design perfectly, but I did a decent job. This style allows me to draw Pinky's face a lot easier, and I can get more creative with facial features. I was really happy when I finished this, I kinda freaked out because, he looks great!! I even drew my gender/sexuality headcanons for Pinky beside him, as well as his signature because, why not? I tried to re-draw this picture a few hours later and I made a new discovery:

Sorry for the blurry pic! But yeah, I think I invented my own unique style!! This is the first version of this; there a few changes from my first re-draw. The main changes are Pinky's eyes being rounder, and his ears a little bit larger. I think the base shape of his head is also a little different. I think he looks so derpy!! I was instantly in LOVE with this updated design, so I decided to draw it again and:

The design is a little different again! And also, my first expression!!!! (Ignore the weird as hell erased Pinky head you see; it was a massive failure and I couldn't erase it all :( ) I really think the Pinky on the left turned out better than I thought!! I love his cute little face and his extra floofy head. The second pic is another kind of model pic, but I added a little tongue because it looked cute. I also added the mind bubble and the little blurb just for added effect. I think he looks cute, what do you guys think?

On day three/attempt 3, I actually doodled a Pinky without looking at a reference in one of my books because I was in school. Here's how it turned out:

I LOVE IT!!!! I was so shocked when I finished with this because I think Pinky looks amazing!! It's not perfect, but when compared to day one, it's like night and day. This is my favorite Pinky I've done so far, and it only took my like 25 minutes; what an improvement when compared to over an hour just for one drawing lol! I've made some small changes here, and I will continue to make changes for the time being. I'm still finalizing my style.

Later on, I did something I'm very proud of:

My first full-body Pinky!! I drew the body first and then added a head in later. I also marked certain areas that I might improve upon later, and little personal touches that I added for fun. Yeah, I think his head is a little too tall, but I'll fix that. I implemented some unique elements such as his muzzle area being based on the OG show, the tufts of fur on his head being longer, the chest fur, his feet being stuffed-animal like, his short legs (which will probably be longer in the future), and his tail being from the reboot. I am currently working on hands; they're just not ready yet. I'm very excited to see my own personal style being formed. I like all the touches I added and I'm excited to maybe work on some screenshot re-draws and other things like that.

Here are some hand sketches. Hand are EXTREMELY HARD for me so I'm trying to get an idea of what I want to do. I was either thinking of the one on the left (larger fingers, rounder shapes) or the one on the right (more angular, slimmer fingers). Idk, which hand style do yo guys think would work better?

I'm very proud of the progression I made on these designs. I'm currently planning on drawing Brain very soon and I will be doing screenshot re-draws, experimenting with changes to eye shape, and more expressions. I'm also writing still (new fic currently a wip), and I'm very excited to be contributing more to the fandom!! Let me know where I can improve and some tips on how to draw their hands. Also, special thanks to @cosmicangel139 for the drawing tips for Brain!! You are amazing and I will definitely keep those tips in mind!!!!

[orie-ology]

A sliver of hope

Fandom: Arcana Twilight

Pairing: Vega x OC/Reader

Warnings: bad grammar and spelling, not proofread, OOC character, mild spoilers for Vega's backstory

Author's Note: Henloooo, this is my first time writing for this fandom, heck even writing on this platform in general. Anyways, I had Vega and my OC in mind while writing this. This is a snippet on how Vega and my OC gradually opens up so if some parts doesn't make sense I apologize for that heheh :>>

story under cut

It was one of those nights, one where your thoughts wouldn't let you sleep.

You've been tossing and turning in bed for the past few minutes trying to get some shut eye, but you simply had too much stuff in your mind.

Ultimately, you decided to get out of bed and go for a quick walk. The night air is chilly, but soothing nonetheless. You found a place to sit then gazed up at the night sky. You've always found the skies of Bound Arlyn to be a sight to behold, especially at night.

Whilst you were busy stargazing, you failed to notice a figure watching, observing you. He didn't plan to follow you, in fact, he was about to rest after a tiring mission. Well, when it came to you, he can't help but worry. But why hide? he asks himself. Maybe he didn't want to get caught, or maybe he still finds it hard to face you. After all, it's been quite a while since he last saw you. The pain of that day, when faith decided to seperate the both you was still fresh. Adding the frustration he felt after knowing you remembered little to nothing of your childhood together (or so he thought) simply made it difficult for Vega to approach you. But seeing you restless and looking lost he can't help but worry, wondering what he can do to help.

While Vega was lost in his own thoughts, he heard you let out a particularly loud sigh. That's enough hiding, he told himself as he made his way towards you.

"...Summoner"

"GAHHHHH!! Oh, it's you."

In your defense, you weren't expecting to meet anyone this late in the evening, especially not Vega.

"What are you doing out here? You should be sleeping."

"Hmm I'm just simply stargazing, that's all." Opting not to say that you couldn't sleep.

"I see..."

An awkward silence followed, not that you mind, it was Vega after all. You've been wanting to speak to him but just couldn't. A lot has changed about him after all those years and you fear that the person you once knew may no longer be there.

"Y/N" he called, startling you from your thoughts. He was seated beside you now, though with a bit of distance.

"You can come to me if there is something bothering you" Ahh so he saw right through you.

"Oh don't worry about it, nothing I can't handle."

Another silence. You wanted to say something, anything, just to keep conversing with him but where would you begin? As you were caught in your little dilemma you heard him speak.

"I missed this."

"Oh?"

"... Y/N there's so much I want to tell you but... where do I even begin?"

Oh. Oh. So he feels the same way?

"Same here"

He looks at you.

"How about we start small? There's no need to rush. We could get to know each other again" you said.

Again... Vega repeats that word in his mind, Hoping that you remembered all those times you both had together.

"That would be nice" he responded

Another silence followed, but this time it's a comfortable one. Maybe, just maybe you could go back to being close friends again, but for now being able to talk with him again is enough.

Well, this scenario looked better in my head. It's probs all over the place but i'll just place this here.

I may or may not continue and elaborate more on this but this will do for now

[katronautt]

KAT'S 2022 YEAR REVIEW & THANK YOU NOTE

well hello there everyone. i'm not sure if this is still a thing this year because i haven't seen anyone doing this (or i just wasn't tagged in one at all sdjfkfkf) but that won't stop me from writing another year review and saying thank you to my wonderful internet friends!

at the end of last year i finally moved out of my parents house so i've been officially living alone for a whole year now and i'm proud to announce that i still live haha its not easy sometimes and it's hella expensive but i enjoy it nonetheless. i continued decorating and furnishing my apartment and it slowly but surely became my comfy little corner on this earth and im very proud of it :3

i know i said last year sucked and i was hoping for a better one in 2022 but boy oh boy was i wrong lmao

this year was shite. like utter shite. i didn't get a job that i enjoy doing or pays well BUT at least i still have a job lol the job sucks and sometimes i wanna jump out from the 3rd floor window but i managed to make wonderful friends among my colleagues so i'm definitely thankful for that. i only work there for 7 months but i already feel like we've known each for years and they definitely make working there bareable.

this year i also finally get to meet my bff (braincell for life), Ariana (@queenofthefaceless) in person and i am very much grateful for that. i'm sad no more meeting could happen in the rest of the year but maybe in the next one 😉❤

towards the end of the year i started working out again because i gained a little bit of weight and altough i became much more confident this year, it started to bother me so i'm proud of myself for not letting it slide and now i'm mostly focusing on getting my strength back i used to have instead of being the couch potato i was all year lol and one of my new years revolution for 2023 is to eat healthier and work out even more.

and yes i am still not over the fact that you guys putting out those wonderful fics for us for free. you still rock !! 💜💜

next year i will continue to hope for a better job, one that i enjoy and pays better (or at least one of these lol) and to be even more confident and open to new things ( and finding a rich husband 🙏)

ALRIGHTY NOW ONTO THE THANK YOU NOTES:

⭐@queenofthefaceless i still love you bro sm. you rock & i can't wait for another year with you (and your amazing fics)💜

⭐my dearest cee @fuckyeahdindjarin. you started writing for the pedro fandom earlier this year and you decided to start it all with a bang haha. i was hooked on consent after the 2nd chapter and was never let go. your writing is brilliant, my favorite thing is how you can amazingly combine comedy, angst and smut in one chapter in such a kickass way i found myself rereading sentences and conversations just so a chapter would last longer. i loved that series and i cant wat to see what you will bringing into 2023! 💜

⭐ i am so honored to call you my friend kc @avennger. and i'm now so glad that i had the courage of sliding into your dm's and start incoheretnly screaming at you (YOU KNOW AFTER WHICH CHAPTER).. because that started our conversation and i love love love chatting with you and bonding over our disaster saurondriel couple haha. you are one of the most talented writer i've met and you have such great potential i'm honestly in awe. the research and work you put ito your works is absolutely mind-blowing and i hope i'll get to read many many amazing works from you in the future! ily 💜

⭐ @foli-vora foli, you continue to amaze me with your amazing fics and your wonderful and friendly personality. please never change and here's to another year filled with insane horniness towards middle aged man 🥂💜

⭐ i think we can all agree that cristina @pedropascalsx is the nicest and most supportive person on this hellsite right? you always surprise me with the insane amount of goodness you have for the people you care about and you showed nothing but supportiveness and kindness towards me too and for that i am so so grateful. you are a wonderful and talented person and i hope you'll have just as wonderful year in 2023 🥰

⭐ @sirtadcooper ruth, even tho you spent a good amount of 2022 taking a break from tumblr (which i completely understand, believe me) like i said before, i was so happy seeing you back on my dash, you were always so supportive and i hope you won't stop making those amazing edits of yours 😘

⭐@mandosmistress mari, you wonderful, wonderful friend.. i was honored to be your best reader of 2022 very early in the year and here i am hoping to achieve the best reader of 2023 next year just as quckily while we continue our horny brainstorming in the dms because i love doing that with you 🤭💜

⭐@ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa i love and miss our late night (& horny) conversations so much. you are such an amazing and nice person katryn and i hope we get to chat again in the new year! ily 💜

and here's tagging the rest of y'all who i owe my life to because once again your amazing fics give me absolute joy and i know i will never be able to pay it back to you beside the support i'm always trying to give back in reblogs and reviews and promotions and such. here's to you all!! 🥂❤ (i am forever sorry if i missed someone):

@absurdthirst, @the-darklings, @softpedropascal, @write-and-buried, @oonajaeadira, @honestly-shite, @outercrasis, @qveenbvtch, @javier-pena, @toomanystoriessolittletime, @storiesofthefandomlovers, @lellowberry, @frannyzooey, @charnelhouse, @krissology, @juletheghoul, @dincrypt, @f0rever15elf, @the-ginger-hedge-witch, @astroboots, @brandyllyn, @littlemisspascal, @radiowallet, @just-here-for-the-moment, @letterfromvienna, @amywritesthings, @the-scandalorian, @whataperfectwasteoftime, @orcas86, @saintmurd0ck, @demonscantgothere

HERE'S TO 2023!!! 🥂💜

[rockyroadkylers]

20 Questions Game for Fic Writers!

I was tagged by @ssmtskw! thank you bud <3

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

23!

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

204,389

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Technically, Marvel (specifically Iron Dad) and Red, White and Royal Blue, though I've taken a huge step back from Marvel.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Baby's Firsts

Domestic Life Was Never Quite My Style

Starlight, Star Bright

Two Worlds, One Family

Tony Stark vs. Babies "R" Us

(um... ok, they're not bad fics, but they're all super old. the fact that they're my top five is due to age more than anything else. I was a semi-popular writer in the height of the Iron Dad fandom's activity. My writing has significantly improved since these were written, so if you've read my most recent work and decide to go back and give these a try, just keep that in mind 😂 most of them are five years old.)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Almost always! There are a couple of unfinished fics that I ended up turning off the comments for, though, because I don't plan to finish them, and I kept getting comments on them that are written with the best intentions but come off as discouraging and kind of obnoxious instead - "update when?" "i know this is a longshot but please update" "it's been two years, will you ever update?" Aside from those, I do try to answer every single comment that comes to my inbox.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Um... I don't really write angsty endings 😂 "I Will Soften Every Edge (I'll Do Better)" is probably as close as it gets? It's not pure angst, but it's not pure fluff, either. "Oh, Little One, You Just Need to be Brave" is another kind of vaguely hurt/comfort angst-adjacent ending, I guess, but please don't read that one 😂 the only reason I haven't deleted it is because I know how frustrating it is when authors delete stuff.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Maybe "Baby's Firsts" or "Before, After, and Beyond"? Like I said, angsty endings are hard to come by in my fics, but if you want pure fluff...

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nah. I've gotten a couple of comments that were confused by something and asked for clarification, but they were very polite about it.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

LOL, no 😂 I'm comfortable talking about it, but I don't think I'd ever write it myself.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve ever written?

I used to write wild crossovers all the time when I was a little kid just learning how writing works for the first time 😂 I don't write them so much, anymore, it's not really my thing, but I think one time when I was a kid I wrote a Harry Potter/American Girl crossover? 😂

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah, actually! Or, at least part of one. Someone translated two chapters of "Before, After, and Beyond" into Russian. I think they forgot to translate the third? It was still pretty cool, either way.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yeah, a couple times. I've taken my name off the published ones, but I'm working on another project with a bunch of people from the Brownstone server, at the moment, and I'm super excited about it!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

At the moment? FirstPrince. It changes depending on my current hyperfixation, but Alex and Henry are my #1 right now.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Ugh. Probably the birthday fic in my "Tony Stark adopts Harley Keener and Peter Parker" AU. I've just completely run out of steam on anything Marvel-related, and I feel bad about it, but there's not a lot I can do. My mood completely plummets whenever I try to sit down and make myself work on any of my old Marvel WIPs, so I've just been giving myself some grace and telling myself that if I never finish them, it's okay.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Ooh, I don't really think about this very much. I feel like I'd need an outside opinion 😂 I've been told by several different people that I'm good at nailing characterizations, which always makes me pretty proud of myself, haha. Every time I get a "this is so in character!" comment I puff up like a peacock 😂

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions, maybe? I can do them, but I feel like they've never quite as interesting as they could be.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I love multilinguism in fics! It's a little intimidating for me personally, because I never quite managed to grasp a second language myself, so I have to rely heavily on translators and asking people who speak the language "hey, does this make any sense?" but especially when I'm writing Alex and his family in RWRB fics, their bilinguism is so important and I don't want to skip it just because I'm scared, so I'm willing to put in a little extra work to make it more authentic.

19. First fandom you ever wrote for?

Well, technically, if we're talking about writing that never even got published, the very first fanfic I ever wrote back when I was probably around six years old was a Harry Potter self-insert 😂 But my first published fic was for the MCU.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

"It's Nice to Have a Friend" 😊

---

tagging @inexplicablymine, @hgejfmw-hgejhsf, @happiness-of-the-pursuit, @littlemisskittentoes, @movetoheavens, @affectionatelyrs, @read-and-write- and anyone else who wants to! (sorry if you've already done it lol)

[elnierah]

Announcement of Writing Hiatus, Yet Too a New Adventure

TLDR: Pausing my writing/fanfics for an indefinite amount of time to pursue drawing. Not abandoning my projects, but need a change of pace.

Hello, my lovely readers! Long time no see...?

This post has been brewing for quite a while, but I've been my usual stubborn self and refused to publicly acknowledge my struggles until now. I gave myself a deadline to make a decision, and that deadline is now here, hence this announcement post. However, to explain a little... Since October of last year ( 2023 ), I've been battling against and contending with an intense bout of writer's block - pretty much right after the 2nd remastered chapter of YCTL released. I also wasn't enjoying myself in the fandom, nor was I content with some of the decisions Atlus was making at the time. With those combined, I genuinely debated leaving/deleting all of my work, as all it brought me was misery. I won't go into too much detail as I don't like airing negativity, but I ultimately decided a break from it all was required, from SMS and such. After a much-needed break and unforeseen support, my volatile emotions ebbed and I managed to see the light again, yet when I tried to return to writing, I felt my heart wasn't as enthusiastic about it as it once was. I even attempted to begin production on Yusuke's B'day fic earlier, thinking that maybe it was the chapter of YCTL holding me down, but that didn't really help either. I was and still am apathetic towards my writing. I don't feel excitement, enjoyment or anything joyus towards it anymore. All I currently feel is frustration and annoyance whenever I try. It's easier to chalk this up to writer's block, because, well, that's ultimately what it is, but it's quite a severe case, unfortunately.

Around New Years, a friend of mine gave me their old drawing touchpad/tablet as they had upgraded, and I've been enjoying experimenting with it and tapping into my childhood hobby/interest since. While doing so definitely has those natural creative frustrations, I've been able to aspire beyond them, and that is ultimately what made me realise what creation should feel like again, and all of the above. It was akin to a wake up moment, one where I realised my relationship with writing as a whole had degraded and just trying to 'willpower' through it was impossible. I do not wish to abandon my projects or writing as a whole, but the reality of the matter is I cannot create anything of worth in my current state - trying to force myself will only lead to hatred, and I really don't want to lose my love for writing more than I already have.

These last 3 months have made it clear I need a change, and so I debated how to proceed forward and ultimately decided it would be wise for me to put my projects on an indefinite hiatus, yet instead of simply mulling over that fact, I should shift my creative energy towards other methods and explore different creative outlets whilst my burnout heals. I, unfortunately, cannot give a timeframe for when I may return to writing, as these issues have a mind of their own, but I'm hopeful this will be a step in the right direction. In the meantime, I plan to pursue drawing again as I've found it rather fun, despite the lulls, but this will primarily be a 'behind the scenes' venture, as I am still very much a fledgling artist and do not harbour any confidence regarding posting my artworks. I'm hopeful pouring my creative energy into something else can facilitate my growth, instead of remaining stagnant as I have the last few months.

As for my accounts, I plan to resume my activities on SMS. I've gone dark the last 2.5 months as I really needed it and wished to spend time with loved ones without these mental pressures, but now that I can see a path forward, I want to enjoy my place within the fandom again. I'll primarily be doing as I always have, posting miscellaneous stuff and supporting other creative individuals - just without the chapter updates and whatnot. Who knows, I may even post some of my artwork that I find decent enough.

To showcase my dedication to this new adventure, I drew a small fanart and wish to share it with you all! I did want to draw something a little more substantial, but the weather here is brutal and there's some other, unrelated, changes occuring in my life at the moment, so I'm rather busy. Regardless, I hope you enjoy this little piece - a piece indicating my wish to forge ahead, no matter its form! ᕙ(✧ヮ✧)ᕗ

This post has been going on long enough, so I'm going to conclude it with a few more words. But ultimately, I am still very passionate and love P5/shukita/kitashu, the form of which I express it is just going to shift for some time! Thank you all so much for your understanding, I honestly wouldn't be here without you all as your support has been paramount throughout the years! I hope this leads to a fruitful future for us all!

❤️❤️❤️💙💙💙

PS: Yes, I had to draw both variations of the ship as I love them both equally~! ヽ(♥ ³♥)ﾉ

[undertalepinkhorsepro123]

I haven't spoken up about the Calcium Cat stuff yet, mainly cause I wanted to get more facts, and also didn't want to risk accidentally writing anything wrong or, well too emotional (I've written stuff meant to be encouraging while enraged/taking in the news before, never ends well).

Cal has confirmed that she is transphobic, and the way she phrases it is sickening. The people she liked posts about are, in general shit people (I sure as hell ain't talking about that shit hole of political madness though-)

I didn't answer yet about it though, as I still wanted to... Really think it through what I would say.

The main reason I was unsure how to go with this is one, the fact I have a book for Calcium Cat, and two, I am not one of the ones affected by this. I'm cis so, I can't begin to imagine how those who loved her, only to find out how she thinks about their existence must be feeling. I decided to wait, and seeing the fandom's reaction is, strangely heartwarming. The (although passive aggressive towards Cal) support for those in the community is inspiring, and helped me come to terms about what to do.

So, I've finally made up my mind about my book, and how to go about this in the future.

I am still going to continue Two Small Dreams. But since I changed a lot of Daze's (very dark) backstory to adhere to her rules, no shipping (abusive relationship for anyone wondering) and also, well dark adult topics, I am thinking about redoing the story to include those topics. It is no longer a gift for Calcium Cat, it'll be a gift for all of the supporters of the fandom, and for those who are affected by this news but still loves OSD.

At the end of the day, One Small Dream isn't Cal. I will not support her, but I support the fandom of little Dream and big brother Nightmare.

I'm thinking of even changing the Nightmare and Dream of OSD in the story to be more canonically correct backstory wise (and some HCs of course). (Maybe even add some trans Nightmare for spite-)

If anyone who once read cannot read anymore, I completely understand. Do what's best for your health.

I'll probably make a poll at some point to ask if I should continue the story or redo it.

But for now, happy new year!

Don't let the news ruin the last of 2023, take a breath and look around, see what you've accomplished. Be proud of yourself, and remember that she doesn't deserve to feel your sorrow.

[duhragonball]

Duhragonba11

(That title looked cooler in my head for some reason.)

Hi, I'm Mike, and on December 21, 2012, I made the first post on this blog. It's nothing special, just a fandub video that always amused me. I didn't have any particular agenda with this thing, which is why I went with the name I chose.

I signed up for tumblr in 2011. Livejournal was dying, I had just moved to a new place and I was kind of looking for a fresh start. My main blog, @sodiumlamp, was my half-assed attempt to do a cool science themed blog. I thought you had to have a moody aesthetic on this site, because a lot of popular tumblrs posted black and white photos with wistful poetry and shit. I was burned out on """fandom""" and wanted to try to write something focused on a more general-interest topic. To be honest, I still want that, but it took a back seat as my priorities changed.

I created a few sideblogs, and decided the only thing I was missing was one for anime nonsense. It feels weird that I waited so long to go through with it, though. That first year or two on tumblr, I was kind of wary of the site, like I didn't know what to do with it, and I was worried I'd screw something up. Anyway, I broke my leg in the fall of 2012, and I spent about five months laid up at my parents' house. It was on the evening of December 20 that I made up my mind to set this thing up. Maybe I just couldn't settle on a name for the blog, or I wasn't sure I could post enough stuff to it to make it worth the trouble. My sleep schedule was a mess in those days, so it doesn't surprise me much that the first post was made in the middle of the night.

What really made this important for me was a post I made a few days later. I decided to just write about Raditz, and it got a lot of notes. Well, more than a hundred, which is kind of a big deal to me. There seemed to be an audience for this stuff, which led me to devote more and more time to this blog. Over the years, my other blogs have fallen by the wayside, and this became my main internet presence.

I don't think this thing is all that "big" in terms of popularity. I currently have 3957 followers, which sounds like a lot, although I usually only see 20-30 unique users in my activity reports. Still, it's a lot for me, and I'm grateful for it. I think things started to pick up in 2015, probably because of Xenoverse 1, Resurrection F, and Dragon Ball Super all starting up around that time. I got a lot of positive reinforcement from my audience, and that was a major factor that led to me getting back into writing fanfiction.

The Luffa concept was something I had been sitting on for years, but I never tried to write it because it seemed like too daunting a challenge, and even if I could finish a story like that, I wasn't sure anyone would bother to read it. But in 2015 I felt a lot more confident about giving it a shot. And people read it! They seemed to really like it! And in early December of that year, I even got fanart of the story.

(Art by @bluewavelengths)

It still blows my mind that this happened. It's eight years later, and I still find myself kind of averting my gaze when I look at this. Like, it's just sort of overwhelming. I really need to assemble some sort of gallery for Luffa art. I've got a folder with a lot of XV2 screencaps and loose drafts, and I'll run across this image from time to time and it always gets to me. Thank you, Nico.

So Luffa kind of took over a lot of this blog space from 2016 onward. I still felt like I should maintain some sort of general presence for an audience that wasn't interested in the character. I don't know if that makes sense or not, but that led me to kind of half-assedly liveblogging JoJo's Bizarre Adventure in 2017, which led me to three-quarter-assed liveblogs around the time I got to Stone Ocean and Steel Ball Run. That kind of set the stage for much of the stuff I do these days. Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z in 2019, Hellsing and Battle Tendency in 2021, and GT and Super in 2023. Well, I like to think I use my whole ass now when I liveblog these things, but I guess I should let history be the judge of that.

I'm not sure there's a coherent message to this. Honestly, I noticed back in January that I passed Year 10, and I thought I should really make a point of doing some sort of retrospective on the next anniversary, so here I am. I kind of debated making it a shitpost, or blowing it off altogether, but now that I've settled on revisiting the history of the blog, I feel like the common denominator here is that I can express myself and there are people who are interested in what I have to say. Every so often someone will tell me they liked something I wrote, and it's great. I'm not good at taking the compliment, but it's still gratifying to know that someone actually paid attention long enough to go "Yeah, he's got a good point." That matters. It matters a lot. If you're reading this, thank you.

I don't know what the future holds. I mean, I'm gonna keep posting stuff here, but for all I know Tumblr will get sold to Yahoo again and go out of business. In the short term, I still have fic work to do, and I've got a lot of messages in my ask box that I need to get back to. Also I'm gonna try to watch Evangelion next year, and reread Jojolion now that it's finished, and see if it makes more sense. Other than that, we'll see.

Serious question: Did I coin the term "Knife Lady"? Like, other people call her that now, but I think I may have been the one to get that started. Maybe I'm kidding myself, but it's fun to think about sometimes. I just don't want to steal fandom valor from the actual inventor of "we should all call that Saiyan 'Knife Lady'." But if it really was me, then that's pretty cool.

[freebooter4ever]

Are the lines on your drawings stylistic choices or are they measurement/guiding lines? Either way, they are cool, but just wondered. I dont understand drawing at all, might as well be a magic spell to me. I was looking at the pencil (?) sketch of Malkin with the cheesecutter hat on.

i, uh, definitely did not google 'cheesecutter hat' until after i saved out these images. :/ sorry about that. if you'd like the other one broken down, i can do that too lol. my reading comprehension when im tired is kinda lazy i just saw 'cheese' and imediately thought 'omelette'. SO here's the 1) initial sketch, 2) 'clean' sketch, and 3) final lines for the omelette boy drawing instead:

also i have had a cumulative of about 9 ish hrs of sleep total for the past two days so keep that in mind for if this explanation makes no sense, its not my fault. :( anyway! the way i draw definitely has changed over the years but currently im really trying to focus on the line i "see" rather than the one that is actually "there". i've been applying this to my writing for years (story vs happening truth) and you know it never occurred to me that i could do it in my drawings too till like...a few years ago. in general these lines seem to form the planes of the subject. if you google 'stanford bunny' you can find an easy example of a 3D surface turned into triangles. I do this too - see things in relative triangle proportions, except i've been doing it long before i knew how computers worked. i cant begin to tell you how long d*sney and cartooning's obsession with round building blocks of anatomical structure fucked with my brain until i finally decided i could cast that teaching aside completely.

ANYWAY sorry off subject again. so we have these sketchy under lines, and usually as im trying to find the proportions and form of the subject these lines end up being where the light/shadow hits. here i saved out the 1) 'flat colors', 2) the 'light', and 3) the 'shadow' parts on their own (i lightened the background for the 'shadow' so its easier to see):

the light is like four or five 'overlay' layers of pale yellow/orange. you can see how each of these layers follow one of those sketchy lines i did initially. and the same with the shadow but instead its a dark red color set to 'multiply' for each layer. and when you combine everything together you get:

some bullshit :). anyway you know that anniversary edition of beauty and the beast that featured the version previewed to nyc audiences in 1990 with the glen ke*ne sketchy keyframe animation of the beast's transformation? i watched that - must have been sometime after i graduated college - and i felt robbed that THAT version was never presented as a final piece. the 'unclean' drawings had so much more life and movement and intensity to them. tldr i like the messy lines, i hate 'inking' with a passion (HATE. IT.), and when i finally allowed myself to stop giving a fuck drawing became way more interesting. but my art is shit and i will never be glen k*ane so i dont really feel like the best advocate for this "style". alas. there was this one artist on tumblr who i fucking loved whose sketches were SPECTACULAR but the asshole racists in the m*c*ha*nz*o fandom bullied her off tumblr and ive never been able to find her art anywhere else since. she was also very negative about her 'unclean' sketches and it made me so sad. there was also this other artist whose sketches were awe inspiring but all she drew was p*rn and well...we all know what happened on tumblr in december 2018.

also i 100% stole the lighting scheme from The Bear which is currently one of the most gorgeous shows on television right now in my opinion

im really really sorry if this makes no sense, if im feeling motivated maybe i'll try again when my brain is fully functioning but with the actual 'cheesecutter hat' doodle ^_^

[mmx-code-crimpphire]

Brief Post on the AU's Origins

This isn't really a headcanon, but a post about how the AU came to life. How I just wanted a short little comic, to making this into a full blown AU.

NEW CHAPTER ON AO3!!

I believe some of you are wondering how that progressed. I’m sure I covered this before, albeit briefly, but if I haven’t, I’m happy to bring it out. I've only told a few people about how it came into existence and I did write it at least once in the info box on a sprite animation I made back in 2018. And, that's where it starts, and that's also when I barely joined the fandom.

I wanted to have a crossover made for Classic and X, considering, at the time, I had the information of the two not being so directly connected to each other, and I was ALL OVER THE PLACE for the ship at the time (who am I kidding, I still kinda am lmao). I am one of those who headcanon they definitely are connected directly, and it should be that way imo. Since, in the classic games, at least some of them, Zero was in the process of being made. Especially Megaman 2: The Power Fighters. It may or may not be canon to the timeline. I say it does but idk how other people feel about it.

Though, I consider that canon, so- take that with what you will.

Anyway, ever since I knew of this happening, I wanted a crossover between the two games so bad. See how Rock and Roll react to X and Zero being from the future. How X and Zero's love influenced other., That kind of thing. Especially considering how that's also how Rock and Bass became shipped in my little circle lmao. I think I'll post another headcanon soon, possibly.

I drew a couple pieces pertaining to this, planning out how some scenarios could go, including a cover to the comic. Which I haven't posted anywhere, unfortunately, and I thought I did. But I didn’t. I also did a redraw, which I might also post but I'm not sure where I put it or the og, as it's all drawn traditionally.

Though, after all of that, this was also before I made the blog in November 2018. And the name was gonna be "The Love and Loveless". Yeah. Doesn't sound like a fitting title at all, does it? As a romantic writer and illustrator, if the story has romance at least half predominantly in the story, I naturally make a romantic title to it. And I didn't like it. I'm also one of those artists that come up with things on the spot and I usually like them. They mostly stay as they are, but sometimes, even after I like the first idea to come to mind, I'll change it eventually. And this was one of thoses things where I didn't like the first thing AT ALL and needed to change it.

So, for the next couple weeks after the title was first thought of, I thought about what the better title could be, and then my thought process went like this as I stimmed: "Hmmm… X is blue, Zero is red.. though mine is black armored. Hmmmmmm. Maybe something with 'Code' in it. Since the story does revolve around them more heavily in it. Ruby and Sapphire, maybe. Nah, too long. Crimson and Sapphire is definitely too long… …Waaait- Crimson. Sapphire. Crimpphire. Code: Crimpphire!! That's it!!"

And that's how the title became as it is now! Not only does it revolve them as a pair, but also as individuals and how their connection made them feel as one. How they supported each other as well as took care of themselves. They indirectly taught each other to do what they can to fight the evil in the world, albeit it was mostly Mavericks for a time. They became each other's heart and soul.

Though- back on topic, sorry lol you get the idea

I loved the title then so I decided to change it to that when I made more fan stuff to accommodate the comic. Though, as the month progressed (this is from September to October btw, right around the start of being in the fandom still), I thought about what X and Zero could do with the Command Mission crew at that point, then it escalated what could happen if they had a beach trip and then took the train home (you can thank the "Spirited Away" track "The Sixth Stop" for this lmao, along with a fanart of X and Zero resting on a train by themselves IT'S SO CUTE!! If I find the link I will put it here), and my mind just went BRRRR and made a little script out of it.

And it.. well - progressed into something way more than just a Classic/X crossover comic. I thought about what other scenarios can happen, especially during X5, so I started making the script for Zero and Dr Light's Deep Conversation. And it became the demo for this AU.

Then it escalated into what if I made this entire thing into an audio drama??? And that idea seemed to work- except I was dealing with a lot of problems behind the scenes, that I felt overwhelmed, and from then on by this post here, I decided to not make it into a full on audio drama anymore. But it's still been a huge process but I think I finally found an outlet that can work for this.

Especially since I haven't done it in literally over 15 years.

I DECIDED TO MAKE A FANFIC OUT OF IT!! And then audio dramas, comics and a few tidbits of art are gonna come out of that!! It took me this long to consider it but I think I'm finally doing it!!

Sorry this also turned into a full on announcement on what the AU's direction is gonna be, but I'm just excited to bring it out!!

That's how the AU became a thing and I'm glad it has with the friends I've gained over the years and it's great to have them!!

I'm glad you all came to see this and it has fed you well so far and I hope I can FINALLY give you a cohesive story I wanted to share since day 1!!

Hope you enjoyed reading!!

[lawain-dimensional-heroes]

BLOG UPDATE

Okay, so this is a post about what's going on thus far.

First off, I'm doing pretty fine so far. I've consume a bucket of chicken wings so I'm hecking full rn. That being said, time to do the actual update part.

Update 1 - how's the ask blog going?

So I had decided at some point to start an ask blog using MMD models to answer asks. I'm going to be honest, after finding out a moot left tumblr (unsure if it's for good or not) a day or so after I decided to start the whole thing it kind of dropped my mood to do it. Don't worry, it's in the back burner, this also includes Maroon's model which I haven't been working on for the same reason. I do however accept asks blog like asks here for Tsukine, Hanaka and maybe Miku too. Just make sure you'll add MMD ask: in the ask and I'll keep that in mind

Update 2 - Current thing on the Dimensional's vocaloid drabble story and potential other drabble story / stories planned

Currently I'm unsure what to do with that. However I am very happy that it allowed me to flex my drabble writing skills and not only that it allowed me to have a story that allows the muses to go do funny shenanigans. It got me so comfortable that I might try and flex some more and write drabbles for other stories. Here's the ones that I am considering:

Maplestory drabbles - I've been meaning to do some of those for quite a while given how I already have an idea of the story planned. I even have a few maplestory muses on this blog with two more going to be added and potentially some more too. There is one drabble in the making but I've put it on the sidelines and never gotten further to it. The drabble was about how Maroon met Jack and Oz. As for Yamato he was going to become a friend in the later stories. A part of it is also because of one or two ships I really want to write at some point but I always wanted to write said ships with moots. But considering how dead the fandom is among other things I think it's better I just do ships on these things myself.

Dimensionals drabbles - I should really and I do mean it: REALLY should do some drabbles regarding main muses-- one or more for Maroon, Hanaka, Tsukine-- maybe some for Akari and the others. Maybe those would be more or less tiny drabbles like I did with the Vocaloid story. But I really am thinking of doing more drabbles-- ones that Hanaka will be a part of cause I have rarely used Hanaka at all and considering that I barely used icons on drabbles if at all, this may be the perfect opportunity to write Hanaka and other muses on this blog.

Update 3 - New muses adding, removing old muse(s) and some changes in the bios

So it's clear to see that I've added 5 new muses and I already have plans to add another muse-- that being the magical girl OC as well as adding the original verses for Mercedes and Tear/Theresa-- or Angelic Buster in her original verse. I'm probably going to add one more magical girl or two-- one of them probably be Miyuki Hoshizora-- or a very canon divergent one for now.

That being said I will remove some muses from this blog-- or at least guest muses that I almost wanted to make a main stay muses: IF, Noire and Nepoty. The Neptunia fandom seems pretty dead and I don't see myself using these muses outside of the dimensionals universe or their original Neptunia verse. The muses I'm going to mention now are on the potentially to be removed list:

Hibiki: I barely use her and as much as I wanted to keep her at ifrst she doesn't have any real role being played on the blog's story. I first wanted to add her to the blog because it might make for an interesting point of view, but considering I barely use her, I might not use her.

Lena Oxton: I swear I was supposed to give her something interesting, but considering I haven't done anything with her thus far, I might as well consider her not a part of this blog. Any ideas however would be nice!

Nanoko: I had an idea to use her to give Hanaka an annoyance to deal with, but like with all these muses I haven't even used her at all so I might remove her from this blog unless she either gets a lot of interactions all of a sudden or I have an idea so fun I have to keep her.

And then there comes one change in the bios of the muses moving forward. I've noticed a lot of the polls regarding muses and their other verse selves that you guys want them to have separate bios. This also includes the other timelines. I always see muses who has versions from other timelines as the same muse, kind of like how the game Elsword treats it, so I'm going to treat almost all of timeline variants as such and put all said variants into one neat bio for the muse, like what I did to Aisha for example. So the Aishas, Elysia and Nafisa are affected. I exclude Nëbel for that because of the fact that neither him or Maroon want to see eachother as the other version of one another regardless on if it's true or not.

So yeah, that's all I have to say. A lot to read perhaps but I had to get this out of my chest. If you've read this far, feel free to leave a like! You don't have to if you don't wanna.

[ask-agent-rapzutin-vodello]

I am going on a hiatus ...sort of!

Hi guys, gals and beloved theysies, I got an announcement to make!

I've been considering this for a while, so here it goes ...

Starting today, "Waiting for our moment" and other "Razputin Vodello AU" related stories will be put on indefinite hiatus. Now don't start panicking! I mean the big stories. I'll still write the occasional one-shots and prompts provided by you and others. This blog will also stay open and I'll keep being active on it.

And although I still got some Psychonauts Stories in me, I will, however, be writing other stories about other fandoms, like 'Little Witch Academia' and 'The Owl House', among others.

Will anything change? Does this mean I am done with the blog or the AU?

NO! The askbox will stay open, and I'll keep running this blog like I've done since I started this. You can keep sending me asks and prompts and I'll keep doing those like I've always done. That doesn't change.

Why am I doing this?

In all honesty, I am getting a bit tired writing stories solely about this AU. Don't get me wrong! I love it! Still do!

But since I started this blog, for almost 9 months after that my main and only focus was "The Lives and Times of Razputin Vodello' and running this blog. And I loved any second of it. The amount of love that it got motivated me throughout all those months and kept me going.

And after that I started writing what I wanted to be the sequel. However ...I feel like "Waiting for our moment" is not getting the same love I thought it would. And that's okay, but it kinda dampens the motivation. And most things that will happen in the story have been kinda mentioned in the asks here.

(I do extend this offer. If you would like a brief synopsis of what would happen in later chapters of "Waiting for our moment" and you don't really care about spoilers, send me and ask and I'll answer it as private. That way, I won't spoil it for others. )

And I've noticed it's getting harder to keep working on the AU stories. That particular candle is a bit ...spend.

And I've been wanting to write other things, but I keep feeling my AU stories looming over me and that makes me put pressure on myself. And that's not good for anyone.

So, I've decided to put those stories on hold and start writing some other stuff. I have more stories in me and I think writing them might get me out of this funk. And like I said, I'm not done writing for this AU. I'll just write other stuff and maybe that way I'll find back some motivation along the way.

So what will I be writing instead?

Like I said, I'm not done with Pyshonauts. I got some other stories that aren't Razputin Vodello AU related. I still want to write that Vampire AU I've been thinking of and I would like to expand on my Pirate AU story I wrote in the summer. There are some little AU's I had my mind on. There are some game stories I want to write.

And you can still send me prompts, AU related or not. Heck, I might make that a whole different thing on AO3.

Also, I've been getting obsessed with "Little Witch Academia" and "The Owl house lately" and "Arcane" lately. And I have this Little Witch Academia story in mind for years! I might actually write it. I mean, the last one I wrote recently got really well received, so ...yeah.

And, like I said, this is not a permanent hiatus. I have been considering making "Waiting for our moment" a spinoff-side project and start writing "The Tides of War", the story that has been alluded to in the epilogue of chapter 15 of "The Lives and Times of Razutin Vodello". I feel like that might ge the same attention I've been getting with "The Lives and Times".

But for now ...I got some other stories in me that needs to get written.

Anyway, I just felt I needed to let you guys know.

I didn't want to make it seem like I'm just dropping everything AU related or something. I'm just ...changing focus, so I might gain focus again, you know.

I'm sure there are fellow writers among you that might have felt - or even do right now - the same way as I do now. And I've been interacting with you lot enought now, that I know you understand why I'm doing this.

Anyways, thank you for reading. Thank you for understanding. Keep sending me those asks. Keep sending me those prompts. Keep supporting the blog.

Love you all.

[calistayed]

          Hello  and  welcome  to  my independent, selective,  private  roleplay  account  for  an original character, Mason  Mayfield. This  blog  is  rather  low  active  and  will  contain  major  dark  themes.  Please  approach  with  caution.  I  also  ask  that  you  read  my  rules  and small about under the cut  before  following.

          Exclusive: zoomingupthathill ,           Affiliated: zoomingupthathill ,

                            Rules to follow! I'll keep it simple: Mun: My name's AJ! I love characters, love talking about them all the time. I love to read and write. I mostly read horror, and recently found it's actually a favorite genre of mine. I'm a nerd, a dork, hella shy, and would love to be your friend!

Please be kind and respectful! If there are any issues with me, please come to me in an appropriate manner. I don't bite, I promise. We all know we can't read each other's minds!

NS.FW. It might be present. He is of age in his main verse, but I'm deciding if even if I want to just make a sideblog for more of that stuff. Either way, I will only write it with those I feel comfortable with for it isn't something I write normally.

Shipping. I love to ship. I'm opened to it as long as we both are good with it, and talk about our muses to see if they click.

Controversial characters. Totally down to write with any type of character. I won't limit myself. If this bothers you, please do not follow.

Triggers. I'll tag what I can/remember. I will NOT write with drunk muses. This doesn't need to be tagged for your threads, I just don't want to deal with it one-on-one.

OCs/Fandoms. Totally chill with OCs, just have some type of an about page. I can try and fit my muses into anything, and will follow blogs I can see working (even if I don't know the fandom).

Be patient! I have a full time job and a few other blogs I hop on. I usually go with the flow, see what muse I have. Plus please be aware that I struggle with depression. Some Days are good and others not so much.

OOC. I love to chat ooc. Through IMs or discord. Whatever works for you. Although, discord is only open to mutuals.

Icons. As of right now I don't have any icons. Even when I do make some I'm totally fine if we don't even use them at all. It's not a make or break thing for me.

Exclusive. I have one exclusive Max which me and the mun talked here and there about these two. I may add more to exclusive depending on plotting and such other things.

MUTUALS ONLY!!!!

                              Small about (cuz I am hella lazy):         any questions about anything please feel free to message.

Name: Mason Mayfield Nicknames: Masey, Mase, Ace Age: 19-20 (s4), 17-18 (s3) Gender: Male Traits: Kind, responsible, loyal, impatient, stubborn.

Mason is the older sibling to Max, and can be argued as the younger or older brother to Billy. Before Billy, Mason and Max were a fair close bonded siblings with the perfect amount of annoyance to each other. However, he grew up fast. Still rather young, he became the man of the house once their father was out of the picture.

Then, as their mother got involved with Neil, things started to shift between the family dynamic. Mason noticed the change the older man brought into the home, and noticed the way he was around Billy as he grew older. Mason spoke with their mother several times, saying how he felt uncomfortable, saying how it wasn't good for any of them to be around Neil.

Once the Fall of 1984 came around, Mason decided he wasn't going to move with his family. He opted to stay with a relative, making up as many excuses as he could for he didn't want to be in the same house as Neil. Mason knew the news didn't sit well with Max, but he made a silent promise he would make enough money to take Max, and maybe even talk to Billy, and get away.

Summer of 1985 came and Mason decided to move to Hawkins with a good amount of money to his name. Happy to see his family again, he only got the cold shoulder from Max. Mason let her be angry, and decided to get a job at the mall to earn even more money. Mason hoped he could talk to Billy at least, but he was also rather distant.

Spring of 1986 came far too quickly. The death of Billy and abandonment of Neil made Mason work long shifts to help support them. Still, it was hard to focus with the strangeness of the town finally hitting him, and the fact of high schoolers getting murdered didn't help.

[onwriting-hrarby]

Hi hope you’ve been doing well !

I still can’t get over this last chapter I love this story so much , I cried over it

I don’t know what to say definitely gonna reread this story again sometime it’s literally been a whole journey and it was worth it that ending and the fact that u had it in mind since the beginning is just amazing, I wanna know ur thinking and writing process during that last scene , the protest and the birth scene playing simultaneously and the way u wrote it was just perfect , how u captured all that chaos , I was literally on the edge of my seat reading it ur writing making me feel many emotions all at once I don’t know how u do that

I started reading this story mainly for EM not really thinking much since it was the first work of urs that I stumbled upon but I was wrong , the way u treat various subjects , how u did every single character justice and wrote about their struggles , if I could write an essay about this masterpiece of a story and how it deserves all the recognition i totally would but this is when I curse my limited English vocabulary, also the fact that u have such dedication and how every time u deliver a 20 pages chapter for each update with the outmost of perfection is worth talking about , no wonder this process must have been stressful , yet u still outdid ur self every time and wrote the best ending for this story can’t imagine it any other way .

I’m so glad that I stumbled upon RJ it’s been a long time and I can’t believe that it’s over ,this story left me with a book hangover and a void I don’t know how to fill , nonetheless I’m glad I found it and even though we won’t get new updates anymore who knows it might be ur novel that I read next in which I wish you the best of luck with and for ur original writing as well , I know it will be outstanding and I will definitely read it if u choose to share it with us , u deserve all the recognition , success and happiness in the world , I can’t thank you enough for your contribution and for choosing EM out of all the fandoms in the world to bless with ur mesmerizing writing and presence, thank you so much dear , and take care of yourself 💜

:')))))) Thank you SO MUCH for commenting and coming to my inbox!

About the ending, I'm actually thinking of doing a post about how I conceived it! Because I had it thought in the beginning and the last sentence changed over time, I think it would be interesting to talk about it, but at the same time I don't want to give a lot away because I really like the idea of how I did it hehehe I'll just talk, in the post, about how I came to the ending and decided to change the sentence, but for you: everything in the ending was pointed out to make you breathless as a reader, so it was important to maintain the rhythm, hence I relied a lot on the different chunks and sizes of the paragraphs. The last chapter has four parts: the Eren/Mikasa resolution, Levi/Erwin breakfast, Friends gathering/Deciding what to do, Protest/Birth. In those four parts, only the first two are "traditional" narrative. The third relies on the bodies and the plurals, and the fourth relies on the difference of rhythm... (Well, maybe I'll do a post, yes!).

...I am almost tearful about what you say in delivering pages and following the story through. It's been stressful sometimes, but god, I absolutely love writing. And there was also a sense of reward every time I got a comment. So I didn't write for the reader, but I definitely knew that even if I got one comment or one kudo more I would be happy. If I didn't, I would have been happy anyways—some chapters more than others, because I'm prouder of some of them—but I think the beautiful thing about fanfiction is interaction, so whenever I felt strained, I decided to keep on pushing.

BOOK HANGOVER??????? that's... amaziinngggg! if you want to read a very good book, give "Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow" by Gabrielle Zevin a try. I have not felt that compelled by a book in a LONG time!

Thank you for the great well-wishes :') I am floored by your comment. I love it. Thank you, and you take care of yourself too!