#if i hear one more time from someone the kind of lies you've been spewing about me that will change

[natblda]

tw ;; rp abuse

reivcn

@alaskaslayer 

 @kennedybtvs 

 @tylerlockwoof 

 @sunnydalescoobies

i wasn’t going to do this. but i’m doing this. the next time you tell someone i was in love with you and talk shit about me or my muses in any fandom...check yourself. because i still have EVERY SINGLE MESSAGE, EVERY CHAT, EVERY GODDAMN THING BACKED UP AND DOZENS UPON DOZENS OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE LEARNED STRAIGHT FROM YOU HOW TOXIC AND ABUSIVE YOU ARE...ALL ON THEIR OWN WITHOUT THE HELP FROM ME I ASSURE YOU. YOU ARE INTERACTING WITH PEOPLE YOU TALKED SHIT ABOUT, I have all of that documented too, and you are interacting with them under a different alias. the number of messages i have received unprompted from people coming to me about the LIES YOU SPEW OUT, IS A MORE ABSURD NUMBER THAN YOU ARE A PERSON. 

YOU are the reason you have NOTHING but your delusions, and NOTHING is keeping me from putting every single message i have on a google document because you are literally a predator to this community. i wasn’t going to do this, i really wasn’t. because the fact of the matter is...for someone who’s so ‘in love with you right’....you mean nothing to me. you DID THAT. not only did you abuse and gaslight me for YEARS, you abused my muse, you slut shamed her for having other verses, you called her a cheater for seeing other people, you threw in my face and her face nearly every goddamn time that luna interacted with anyone else ...that I QUOTE “RAVEN DOESN’T NEED OTHER VERSES JUST LUNA, WHY DOES LUNA NEED MORE THAN RAVEN, WHY IS RAVEN NOT ENOUGH, LUNA IS ENOUGH FOR RAVEN. WHERE IS RAVEN IN THIS REPLY? TELL THE OTHER MUSE RAVEN IS THERE SO THAT THEY KNOW LUNA IS TAKEN.” 

like NO. how many times i said...get raven out there, let her explore, let her meet other people? it’s GOOD FOR HER? IT’S GREAT FOR MUSES? and you flipped at ME with that same gaslighting again. RAVEN ONLY WANTS LUNA. IT’S LUNA WHO CLEARLY NEEDS MORE. like honestly. the emotional abuse that you put me through and my muse through, to the point where i almost quit writing her? to the point where luna couldn’t even look at your raven without seeing YOUR NASTY BEHAVIOR BEHIND HER VOICE. and you would say...i cant interact with others bc no one in this fandom likes my raven, they all blocked me. BECAUSE OF YOU. BECAUSE OF YOUR SHIT, AND DON’T WORRY, I HAVE YOUR MESSAGES SAYING THAT IT WAS YOUR FAULT AS A MEANS TO MAKE ME GO ‘awe poor you, you’re just misunderstood. they just know you like i do’. but the truth is? THEY DON’T KNOW YOU THE WAY I DO AND THE WAY EVERY PERSON WHO BLOCKED YOU DOES. POOR ANYONE WHO COMES INTO CONTACT WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE A PREDATOR AND A LEECH IN THE RPC.

I DO NOT BELIEVE IN CALL OUT POSTS. BUT I DO BELIEVE IN SAYING MY PIECE WHEN I HAVE BEEN ISOLATED AND SUBJECTED TO YOU FOR YEARS UPON YEARS. and you have the audacity to talk shit about me saying that I WAS THE ONE WHO DID ALL THE ABOVE MENTIONED THINGS TO YOU? yeah that sounds familiar, bc everyone in the world abuses you, you are a victim of everything. literally everything. the number of times i heard you say “not to be racist but...” and then proceeded to spit something racist out of your white mouth.  the number of times you were transphobic, hell...i don’t have to mention that, most people saw that on the dash because you outed yourself with ‘in 2012 people like me could use any fc we wanted with any gender orientation and it was fine so i can still do that!” like..no. i let slide so much that i should NEVER HAVE ALLOWED. I BIT MY TONGUE BC I THOUGHT...maybe she just...needs to be educated on these things, maybe she doesn’t know what she’s saying, maybe it’s just not registering how to be an honest and genuine person. like i get it, people bicker, they have misunderstandings, but at least have the goddamn audacity to be straight forward with it. 

i learned today from a few people...that you accused ME of doing these things instantly upon meeting these people, not even knowing them, and you so readily spilled lies about me. and i figured out why...because you don’t have control of me anymore, you don’t control my muse anymore, because i cut the strings and i cut you out and i kept moving forward, i kept going on, happy...without you. interacting with raven’s who ARE RAVEN, NOT YOU and your narrative behind her face and name. 

the hours i devoted to you, the hours, days, weeks, months, stating over and over again how I WAS YOUR FRIEND AND NOTHING MORE THAN THAT, AND YOU TRIED COUNTLESS TIMES TO BAIT ME. let’s see if you remember this. 

“i told my friends you’re my girlfriend i hope that’s okay.” 

and me...going, i mean we’re friends, i am not in the country, but assuming it was an issue with your self-esteem i said...i guess that’s fine but we’re friends, we probably hang out as much as gfs do but we ARE NOT. and then you turned around with...now you’re giving me mixed signals are we girlfriends? LIKE YOU LIED TO YOUR FRIENDS, YOU STRAIGHT UP KNOW WE WEREN’T , hence the ‘i told my friends you’re my girlfriends’ like you KNEW WE WEREN’T, SO YOU ALREADY KNEW THE GODDAMN ANSWER WAS NO, BUT YOUR DELUSIONS LITERALLY DONT GET IT AND SO YOU ATTEMPT TO BAIT. i’m sorry that after 4+ years sitting on skype every day i can not imagine being with someone i watched eat more out of their nose than of actual food. that was just the tip of the iceberg because then we’re going right back into all of the toxic nightmare you put me through, all the shaming you put luna through., and that carried into threads most of the time, luna having to look at raven and feel like a cheater. like you know what, like i said i wasn’t going to do this, but having just met some amazing rpers i am so blessed to be able to write with and hearing the kind of lies you spilled about me and this whole situation.

i’m going to go to the time when luna was single verse, single shipped with your raven, and when she would interact with FRIENDS, she was slapped for it, i was slapped for it. the time when you tried to pimp raven out in the IMs of one of our mutuals and then that mutual came to me and went...look, im not comfortable, my muse isn’t interested, i’m trying to respect the fact that you guys are single shipped but basically rowan is trying to get my muse to have sex with her. and i went...news to me, i thought we were single shipped, but from this day on...it’s best that we are not. because you know what, considering how many times luna had already been shamed for having friends at that point, to find out that you were ACTUALLY DOING what you were shaming luna for doing, when luna wasn’t doing it? pissed me off and completely broke my rp partner trust in you. and you were only pissed because you got caught, bc someone else was a genuine and respectful person enough to tell me about it. after all the shaming you threw at luna and it was YOU breaking the single ship status. NOT ME. and from that day forth i guess you know what they say...faithlessness breeds a guilty conscience.

i DO NOT HAVE TO PROTECT YOU. YOU DO NOT DESERVE PROTECTION FROM ME. A PREDATOR DOES NOT GET TO SIT BY AND SAY...I’M BEING BULLIED. and i know that’s what you’re going to say, i know because you’re a victim of everything and you depend on my silence and me protecting you bc i cared about the muses. BUT I DO NOT HAVE TO PROTECT YOU. YOU DO NOT DESERVE MY SILENCE. I WILL NOT BE SILENT TO PROTECT YOU. I WILL PROTECT MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS AND EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER BEEN SUBJECTED TO YOU, EVERYONE WHO WILL EVER HAVE THE MISFORTUNE OF BEING SUBJECTED TO YOU, AND WHILE I DO THAT, I WILL BE MAKING THAT GOOGLE DOC.  

SO...ROWAN, HIDING UNDER THE ALIAS OF CASS, [ an alias that she used in the past to make it seem like she had backup during an episode of her toxic behavior. yes. she created the alias and a clarke blog and conversed back and forth with herself on the dash so that it looked like she had someone backing her up when she was being passive aggressive on the dash ] she will likely find a dozen other alias to go by. i haven’t had to change mine, i haven’t had to hide, or move blogs, or switch anything just to get people to NOT KNOW WHO I AM, to trick people into interacting with me so that they think i’m someone else. she relied on my silence, she depended on me caring about the ship too much to speak up and defend myself or others, but i am done being silent. 

[blazehedgehog]

Hope this isn't too much trouble to ask but how do you deal with all the negativity and anger that seems so rampant among people nowadays? (Btw I'm so sorry to hear about all your recent life stuff you're going through man, hope everything gets better)

You kind of just have to accept human nature, at a point. Anyone can be wrong about anything. Truth can be a matter of perspective. Or to put it another way -- what's normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.

Whether you are a spider or a fly doesn't matter.

You have to pick what's important to you and live your life according to that. There will be people out there that can, and will, disagree with what you've chosen to be important. And you might think, "oh, well, I've got to defend the way I live! I have to prove to the world that I am valid!"

You don't. I mean, if you're young, then go ahead and get it all out or your system. Its cathartic, to an extent. But after a certain point you'll run out of that catharsis, and you will learn that it's better to choose your battles. There are people out there for whom you can argue, and argue, and argue, and they will never change. It's a waste of time and energy. You will go grey and have accomplished nothing of value.

And I've met people that are like "oh well I'm going to keep arguing anyway because maybe I'll change someone." I've been there. There are people you will never change. And by the time you hit 30 years old, 35 years old, you will eventually come to realize it. I did, a lot of my friends did, it's just one of those "true adulthood" sorts of things.

And you also need to realize that the people you might be arguing with are a symptom of a larger problem. Larger than them, and certainly larger than you. By arguing with them you are cutting the stems off the plant but the roots of the problem are still there. They are getting bad information from a machine tailor-made to feed them bad information. The negativity they're spewing at you (or in to the world), in some roundabout way, is "valid." They are upset about something, something that looks and feels real to them, but that something has been twisted and manufactured as a smoke screen they aren't able to penetrate. It's not really their fault. They are human. It's the machine's fault for making such powerful lies.

And this lying machine is big, and nebulous, and hard to fully comprehend. It is generations old, and many layers deep. You cannot attack it by yourself and expect to do any damage.

All you can really do is find and hold on to your personal values and be smart about which battles you pick. There's no sense working yourself into a frenzy over something that's too big for you to meaningfully effect alone.

Being steady and careful about your fight matters a lot in the long term. Evil is never forever. It all passes in time. There will always be a day where the bad guys answer for what they've done. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not a year from now, maybe not in our lifetimes, but it will happen some day. If nothing else, you have to hold on to the hope that it will happen some day.

People who act in selfish, destructive ways will eventually, y'know, self-destruct.

There are still good people out there. People who want to do what's right. Find them. Combine your strength with theirs. Share the comfort of their existence. Fight as a collective, and you'll find that moving mountains gets a lot easier. Focus on the positivity you bring in to the world together.

Focusing on the misery and the negativity isn't productive. You are not making the world a better place by reminding yourself or others how much it sucks out there.

Even if all you're doing is distracting yourself from what's awful, that means you aren't putting more negativity out in to the world. That doesn't mean you have to give up, that doesn't mean you have to pretend the struggles do not exist, it just means you have to stop wallowing in the bad vibes. Misery loves company. You're just making more misery.

I've been in depression spirals that lasted me for years. Decades, even. It's a long and hard process to climb back out, especially if you get deep enough. I'm not saying this is easy to do, and I'm not saying I know the answers, but you have to learn to catch yourself and pull out of it before it becomes a problem.

Keep hope in your heart. When you find a way to fight back, fight hard. But nothing will come from fighting alone, and nothing will come from exhausting yourself with misery before the fight even begins. You will need to save that energy for when it actually matters.

Until then, enjoy good friends and entertainment. You must take care of yourself before you can take care of the world.

[kpop---scenarios]

The Ride (3)

Part One | Part Two |

Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader

Warning: Violence, Blood, Smut

Word Count: 2.8k

"Hey cousin." Rose sneers, looking at you up and down as if you were pathetic. "Not so tough now, are we?" She laughs, fake pouting before erupting in laughter. 

"When grandpa gets.." you begin but she cuts you off quickly. 

"Grandpa isn't going to do a fucking thing. He still hasn't responded to that little home movie we sent." She admits. "We'll give him another few hours before making another move." She finishes with a wink before leaving you alone, closing the heavy door behind her. 

That fucking bitch, you think. Your blood is boiling that she did this to you. You were going to get out of these ropes and when you did, you were going to beat her ass. 

You looked around the room for something, anything that you could use to saw through the ropes. Lucky for you, you see a small nail sticking out of the corner of the wall and you manage to crawl over despite your ankles being tied together as well. 

You stand up, trying to ignore the pain that radiating through your entire body as you rub the rope over the nail, listening to the faint sound of the rope unravelling.

** 

You're laying in the same spot as you were when Rose left the last time, the only difference now is that your hands are free, as well as your feet but she doesn't need to know that. You lay there waiting, just waiting for the moment of her return. 

"We'll start soon. Just let me make her look a little worse." You hear Rose from the other side of the door. Taking a deep breath, you prepare yourself as she opens the door. You close your eyes, waiting for the perfect moment. You listen closely, the sound of her feet dragging gets closer and closer to you. 

She kneels, you can feel her breath as she hovers over you. "Pathetic." She spits. 

"Yes bitch, you are." You say, sitting up and colliding your head with hers to knock her back. She gasps as she stumbled backwards, her fingers reaching up and touching under her nose and feeling the blood leaking down. 

"You bitch." She snarls, charging for you. Her hands balled into fists, she takes a swing for your face, landing the punch on your cheek. You now charge for her, your hand grabbing a clump of her hair, yanking her head down as you lift your knee quickly, hearing the crunch of her nose as her face meets your knee. She lets out a scream as you push her to the ground, walking towards her, your chest heaving. She scrambles to her feet, charging at you like a linebacker, knocking you into the wall. You bring your elbow up, nailing it into her back a couple of times as he continues to pin you. When she finally let's go, she swiftly punches you in the stomach a few times, hitting your ribs, making you double over in pain. 

But you knew if you were going to get out of there, you needed to step it up and fight through your pain. You muster up all the energy you have inside of you and punch her in the face before lifting your leg, kicking her in the stomach, knocking her to the ground. You climb on top of her and feed her shot after shot, until she's crying, blood spewing from her face. 

"Whose plan was this!?" You growl. 

"Mine!" She cries. 

"Bullshit. You're not that smart." You spit. "You sent this to grandpa.. for what?" You ask, hitting her again. 

"It was his idea!" She screams, crying heavily. "It was grandpa who planned this." She finishes. 

You stumble back off her, looking at her confused with tears brimming in your eyes. You and he were so close, this didn't make any sense. "W-what? Why?" You whisper.

"I may have put it in his head you were going to have him voted out and take over." She coughs. "I knew if he thought that, he'd get rid of you and sure enough he tried." She says, still laying on the floor. 

"I would never." You say. 

"Well in his mind, you were. I wanted you gone. You were always his favourite and I hated it. So I thought if I could make him think you were trying to get him out, maybe he'd love me more." She says. 

A few seconds later her two partners run into the room, looking around at all the blood and then seeing Rose laying on the floor. 

"Rose! Rose! Are you okay?" One asks. 

"No you fucking idiot." She scoffs. "Do I look okay? Take me to a hospital." She whines. 

"What about.. her?" The other one asks. 

"Let her go. I'm done with this bullshit." She finishes, as one of the men helps her up. "Here." She says, tossing you a set of car keys. 

You limp your way out to the car, your hand holding your ribs as you climb into the passenger seat. Rage fills your body as you start the engine before speeding out of the gravel parking lot. Rose's words spin through your head as you speed to your grandpa's house. 

Twenty minutes later you speed into the driveway, feeling lucky the gates had already been open. You come to a complete stop, throwing the car into park and getting out, limping to the front door. You bust inside, yelling as you walk down the hallway towards the living room. 

"Grandpa!" You sing as you make it to the staircase, where you see Baekhyun running down to see what was going on. 

"Ayn?" He whispers, staring at you shocked. "How.. how did you get out?" He asks, gently pulling you in for a hug. "What happened? Where were you?" He questions. 

"It was Rose." You breathe, trying not to cry. 

"What?" Baekhyun asks. 

"She did it." You pause. "For him." You spit, your voice is shaky as you point to your grandfather who was standing in the doorway of his office. 

"What are you doing here?." He asks, his face remaining unimpressed. 

"Aren't you happy to see me?" You yell. "I know this was you. Rose told me everything." 

He says nothing. 

"She told me all about how she made you think I was trying to get a vote going to get you out. That's not true! I never did that and would never do that!" You cry. "She lied to you." 

"Oh, now Rose wouldn't do that." He chuckles. "I've seen the way you've been acting around here. Whispering to people, clearly trying to get them to vote for you." 

"I've never once said or did that. Grandpa, you know I would never! You know me! How can you believe her?" You ask, feeling heartbroken.  You couldn't believe that he thought of you like this. 

"You know what, I just need a doctor now. I'm going to lay in my room." You spit, turning to the staircase with the help of Baekhyun.

"I can't have a traitor living in my house." He chuckles. "You are no family of mine anymore, Ayn. And if I were you, I'd watch my back. And don't think about doing anything.. that might harm anyone." He finishes, turning to go back into his office. 

Baekhyun scoops you up in his arms, carrying you out the front door of the house you used to call home. 

** 

An hour later Baekhyun pulls you from his car, carrying you into EXO's house. He carries you inside, calling out for someone. 

"Lay! I need help." He yells, taking you to the living room and laying you down on the couch. 

"What happened?" A blonde man asks, kneeling beside the couch, trying to decide on which wound to look at first. 

"Her grandfather, Chairman Yang had her kidnapped and tortured." Baekhyun seethes, his teeth clenched together. 

"What the fuck." One of the mumbles, his eyes wide as you try your best to breathe. 

"I'm going to need to reset some ribs and some other things. Bring her downstairs, she's going to have to be put under." Lay says. "Kyungsoo I'm going to need your help." He says to another man who rushes off. 

Baekhyun scoops you up again, bringing you down the narrow staircase, and into a room that closely resembles a surgical room at a hospital. 

"You'll be okay." Baekhyun smiles, rubbing your head as you get hooked up to some machines. "I'll be right here when you wake up." He finishes as they inject you with the sedation. Your eyes become heavy and the last thing you see is Baekhyun's smiling face as you close your eyes. 

** 

It feels like minutes, but according to Baekhyun it's two days later you wake up from your surgery. Lay had told him that your injuries weren't as severe as he expected when he went in there but they were still pretty bad and it would take you some time to recover. 

"I have to lay in bed for 4 weeks?" You groan, throwing your hand over your eyes. "I need to get revenge, or do something." 

"You leave that to me, just focus on getting better. But did you have anything in mind for Chairman Yang and Rose?" Baekhyun asks. 

"Take. Them. Out." You grit through your teeth. Your family wanted to turn on you, frame you and disown you? Then you owed them nothing and didn't give a fuck about them. You close your eyes again, the exhaustion taking over once again.  

** 

The 4 weeks you were practically forced to stay in bed were the longest weeks of your life. By the second week, you had been feeling much better but no one would let you do anything, except shuffle your way to and from the bathroom if Baekhyun would even allow that. 

Not to mention, he refused to touch you at all, and to say you were horny was a huge understatement. 

"So I'm cleared now?" You ask Lay. "To do anything?" You ask, winking at him weirdly. 

"Yes, you can have sex now." Lay chuckles, standing up to leave your room. 

You quickly rushed from your bed and to your shower, needing to freshen up before Baekhyun got back from whatever errand he had to run. You scrubbed your hair, your body, shaved every surface, just made sure there was no longer any smell associated with what had happened left. You were dealing with the trauma, but right now you wanted to forget it all and get railed by Baekhyun. 

After your shower, you quickly dried your hair and went to the dresser to find any kind of lingerie. Luckily for you, tucked way in the back was a small little lace piece that was just your size. You ripped the tag off, shoving it back in the drawer before putting it on and loving the way it made your tits look. 

You could hear Baekhyun's voice down the hallway, so you sprinted back into your bed, covering yourself with the covers when Baekhyun walked in. 

"Hi." He smiles. "How are you feeling?" He asks. 

"I'm okay." You smile. "I have a surprise for you." You whisper. "Turn around." 

Baekhyun smiles widely, turning around and tapping his foot as he waits. You get out from under the covers, sitting on your knees you adjust yourself before telling him to turn around. 

When he turns, his mouth drops as his eyes scan your body up and down a few times. 

"I.. uh. Wow. Like.. wow." He says, clearing his throat. "I thought.. " he pauses. 

"Lay cleared me." You purr. 

"For?" He asks. 

"Everything." You whisper. 

You crawl off the bed to where Baekhyun is standing, you can see the outline of his hard cock through his jeans, making your pussy throb. You undo the button and the zipper of his jeans, pulling them down along with his boxers to free his cock. You grip your hand around his already throbbing cock, stroking him from base to tip. 

"So hard.” You moan. You slowly stroke his cock, back and forth, watching the precum already dripping from his red, swollen tip. You lick your lips before opening up your mouth, engulfing his cock, his tip hitting the back of your throat as you begin to hum, the sweet vibration sending so many chills down his spine. 

Your hand pumps his base as your mouth takes on the rest of him, your tongue swirling around. You can feel the saliva seep from your mouth as you swallow him, sucking and pumping until he's almost ready to bust. 

"S-stop before I cum." He growls, but you continue sucking him off, making him pant. His hand grabs a clump of your hair, yanking your head back, forcing his cock from in your mouth. 

"I said stop, baby." He growls, staring down at you. His hand is still gripping your hair, forcing you to look up at him as a mixture of his precum and your saliva drips down your chin. 

"Yes, sir." You smile. 

"Hands and knees." He demands.

Eagerly, you climb on the bed, getting onto your hands and knees, swaying your ass from side to side as Baekhyun comes up behind you. He grabs your ass, squeezing harshly before raising his hand and laying a hard slap on your right cheek, making you yelp. 

"Quiet now, princess." He purrs.

You feel his fingers gently grazing your clit from underneath before moving up, his fingers slowly pushing into your pussy. 

"Ahh." You gasp, it's been so long. Your head drops down as you bite your lip, moving back and forth against his hand. 

"Are you eager?" He chuckles. 

"Fuck me." You beg. "Please push your cock in me and fuck me until I cum all over it." You whine. 

"As you wish." Baekhyun groans. He pulls his fingers from inside you, sucking them clean of your juices. 

He pumps his cock a few times before pushing himself into you, stretching your pussy around his cock. 

"Fuck." You both huff. You missed the feeling of Baekhyun's large cock stretching you out, fucking you raw until your scream. 

"Fuck me hard." You demand. Baekhyun's hands land on your hips, his fingers digging deeply into you. He snaps his hips once, thrusting so hard it jolted you forward, causing shivers to spread across your body. 

"Please. Just like that." You whine. Baekhyun continues to fuck you slow, but thrust hard, making you cry out in pleasure each time. 

His hand leaves your hips, moving to underneath you, his fingers pressing your swollen clit, rubbing the bud and making you cry out louder. 

He hunches himself over you, continuing to rub your clit but his thrusts are fast and hard, pounding his cock into you. 

"Don't.. don't stop." You stutter, your breathing laboured as your orgasm builds so quickly. "I'm gonna.. cum." You whimper, your orgasm spreading through your entire body, making you shake as you cum around his cock. You tighten your pussy, making Baekhyun cry out as he releases himself into you, filling your pussy up with his juices. 

"Fuck." He breathes, sitting up, his cock still inside you. He raises his hand, landing a smack on your ass again, chuckling while he pulls out and drags you to the shower with him, his cum dripping down your leg. 

** 

A few days later, Baekhyun stood by the front door with you, pleading for you to rethink going on a run. 

"I have something else we can do?" He winks, nudging your arm. 

"I need this run but when I get back, definitely." You smile. "Plus we need to go over the retaliation on Chairman Yang. Make sure everything is going according to plan." You finish, giving Baekhyun a peck on the lips before walking out the door. 

You plug in your headphones as the sun shines down on you. You feel good, you're happy and things are working out just the way they should. Just as you leave the gates, you see a familiar car sitting outside, with your grandpa leaning against the car. You pull out your headphones, yelling over to him. 

"What do you want?" You yell. 

He chuckles and shakes his head as he walks towards you. "I told you not to try anything stupid." He says. "And now here you are planning on retaliating against me?" He says. 

"How did you.. " you trail off. 

"How did I know?" He asks. "I've got a rat in there." He laughs. "I warned you. And now you'll pay the price." He finishes turning around to head back towards his car. 

You roll your eyes, turning around to walk the other way. Just as you're putting your headphone back in, you hear what sounds like a gunshot before you feel a hot, burning sensation in your back, along with wetness pouring down your back. You collapse to your knee before falling to your stomach, laying on the gravel bleeding. You barely hear the car driving away, just as you barely hear the sounds of Baekhyun screaming your name before you succumb to the darkness

[distrackles]

Resistance: Part 3

Dean Winchester x OFC

MASTERLIST

Detest /verb/: dislike intensely

- B o -

I woke up the next morning with my body completely disregarding the pillow boundary I had created the night before. My nose was smashed right up against Dean's shoulder and my hand was balled up on his chest. I slowly lifted my head, and looked at his sleeping face. Even in a deep slumber, his facial expression was troubled and guarded. The crusted blood on his temple that I somehow forgot to make him wash off did not add any softness to his hard features. As soon as I remove my forearm from his chest, his eyes blink open. I should have tried to pretend that I wasn't just studying his face, or I should have at least pretended that I had also just woken up, but I didn't. In fact, I didn't even look away or speak at first.

Dean swipes his tongue over his lips before he lazily smiles. "Mornin'."

"Morning." I breathe out and attempt to plaster the annoyed facade I have targeted towards him. A majority of the warmth leaves the bed and exposes my body briefly into the colder air when Dean leaves the bed. I remain in my spot for a few more minutes, my mind was in awe that it got a full nights sleep.

When I get downstairs, I have already gotten dressed for the day and fixed my hair. Dean is cooking breakfast as Riley sips coffee, and Sam is sitting at our kitchen table with his laptop on in front of him. I immediately go towards the steaming coffee pot which required me to squeeze myself between Dean's back and the counter. After I pour the coffee into my cup and leave it black, I make a face at the bacon that is sizzling and spewing grease in the pan.

"Oh, please don't tell me you're one of those health freaks too." Dean groans, and Riley laughs at him.

"Sorry, I would hate to die of a heart attack after all I have been through, seems a little anti-climatic." I reply and take a seat at the table across from Sam. Dean exaggeratedly rolls his eyes, making a point of stuffing bacon into his mouth in a detesting manner. Sam takes our suddenly small looking mug into his hand and downs the rest of his coffee. He proceeded to announce to his brother that he found another case not too far away. And he also adds that they'll just go ahead and head home afterwards since it is down that way.

I almost thought I might possibly feel a little bit of disappointment when he finished talking. I don't know if it was because something in me enjoyed having new faces around. Maybe it was because I was gonna miss having a chance at another full nights sleep. Or it was the gut feeling that it wasn't a good time for them to be leaving. I never voiced my thoughts that I had during this moment, because I knew they would never listen to that kind of thing. It takes them less than ten minutes for Dean to quit eating, and for Sam to pack up his computer and jackets that Riley washed for them. Riley also walks them both out to the car, I catch her kiss Sam's cheek while Dean wasn't watching before both men get into the vehicle. The pit in my stomach only grows stronger as I watch them drive away.

.

It began with the screaming of the name "Sammy" before the visual of Sam Winchester trapped with long sharp clawed fingers wrapping around his throat interrupted the blackness. The image pulsates and the fluorescent green eyes over the Winchester's shoulder become suddenly noticeable. He seemed to be out of breath and his hand is twitching against the werewolf's filthy one. Every small flinching move of Sam's finger would cause the wolf to tear his claws further into the skin of his throat.

"Dean, don't!" said Sam, trying to be stern in his breathless state. After another pulse, Dean's livid and tense face appears. I could see Dean lunging for the creature that has his little brother at his mercy. Before the older brother could play out his attack another werewolf, out of nowhere, appeared. The monster took him down from the side before Dean even saw it coming. I felt like I was there with them, I wanted to scream, run to them, do something! It felt as if Dean was staring directly at me as the wolf tore into his stomach and then his cheek. Actually he was staring directly at me, and I could honestly swear he was mouthing my name with no sound.

I spun around to see if he was looking at anything behind me, and I wanted to fall to my knees. There laid Sam, neck torn to shreds, and a gaping hole in his chest where his heart should be. It was as if someone had turned the volume back on in my ears because I could finally hear Dean yelling. He was yelling for his brother even though he was being brutally injured at the same time. I wished so badly that I was able to take a step towards either of the men, but my mind had me planted in one spot. Once I had managed to make some steps, no matter how much I quickened my pace, Dean seemed to get farther and farther away from me.

He began shaking his head as he noticed me running towards him, everything had gone silent again. It didn't make me stop moving though. The thing that did stop me had no distinct face, they were something I saw a lot. I was pinned to the endlessly ebony colored environment, Dean still feverishly shaking his head. My airway felt like it was inclosing on it's self and I began to scramble at nothing. My vision got blurrier every time I blinked, but I could tell that Dean's fighting had weakened.

The last thing I could remember was a moment of clarity when I looked at Dean's bloody, dead expression before I heard another voice scream my name.

"Bo! Wake up!" Mine and Riley's heads almost clashed into each other's when I jerked awake. She has a reflex for moments like this where she automatically moves her's away as soon as my eyes open.  "What happened this time." She asks softly.

I suck in a shaky breath, pushing my flyaway hairs off my forehead. "I don't know, I've never had them feel so real before."

"Who was it?" Riley questioned, as she rested her steady hand over my trembling ones.

"I was watching Sam and Dean get attacked by werewolves, and I just couldn't save them no matter how hard I tried." I reply, sniffling. Riley nods slowly, it sounded like a normal nightmare for someone like me to have. "Riley, this one was different...it's hard for me to even believe it didn't actually happen."

"I'm sure they are totally fine, your mind probably just turned the thought of them hunting something as simple as werewolves into a horror show from the lack of sleep."  She tries to reassure me, but I still had the inkling that something wasn't good about this. I go to protest against her claim just as she shushes me. "I'll stay in here, try and sleep again." She commands, and then get herself comfortable beside me.

I huff and lay back down, when I close my eyes all I can picture is the look on Dean's face as he yelled for me and his brother. Then the image of Sam's lifeless, and heartless, body on the ground. As I laid there and relived that horrible nightmare, I tried to have a little bit of faith in someone out there who may have been listening. I hoped that those guys actually made it out of that hunt with only a scratch, or two. The thought of calling Sam or Dean also crossed my mind, but I also had too much pride to let Dean think I cared if they, in fact, were just fine.

"I can feel you over thinking this." Riley grumbles from beside me. I roll my closed eyes and turn my back to her. Before I can even think about trying to sleep again, there is a pounding at the front door downstairs. We both sit up and make our way down there together. Riley peaks through the peephole before she curses under her breath.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." I have never seen her whip that door open so fast, and I wish she had been able to do it faster after I see what lies on the other side.

A broken looking Sam, and a bloody and beaten Dean leaning into him. Riley quickly lets them in and gets Sam to put Dean on the couch, she then glances at me and gives me the "why are our lives like this" look. I start springing into action when Sam is slicing away at Dean's layers of clothing, as he tries to show us where he knows the injuries are. Quickly threading a needle, I get on my knees beside the couch and start stitching up his wound, as Dean goes in and out of consciousness with Riley pouring alcohol on the slashes in his stomach. I vaguely register the small trying-to-be-postive sentences that Sam is trying to convince his older brother about.

Once the stitching becomes the only job left, Riley takes the rubbing alcohol and starts assessing Sam's needs. Dean lets out a loud pained groan at one particular stitch that I put through him.

"Sorry, I'm sorry." I stumble out words, apologizing for the pain and because I never spoke up before they left for this hunt. If I could have truly just tried to stop them, I could have stopped this from happening. If me and Riley would have followed them like Riley had suggested earlier, we could have helped. But we didn't do any of those things, and now here I am sewing up a man I met just days ago, his blood all over  my hands and probably the couch.

"Okay, you're pieced back together, here is your reward." I put the bottle of whiskey that is with our first aid materials to his lips and lets him drink as much as he desires. As soon as the liquid is down his throat, I can see him use his last bit of determination as he drops his head back.

I stand up, giving Dean one last look to make sure I had not missed anything, and go to wash myself off. I shake my head and squeeze my eyes shut tight for a moment, as the nightmare scenes coming flooding back to me when I see the blood washing down the drain.

Looking at Dean's bloody, dead expression. Him yelling my name, shaking his head violently to stop me from coming to him. Seeing and hearing the pain in his voice as he screamed for his little brother to be okay. Not being able to help them. Watching the aftermath of both Winchester brothers dead, and not coming back.

"Bo. Are you done?" I snap out of my daze when Riley asks if I can get out of the way so she can get a shower set up for Sam. I nod, moving out of the way, and go to the living room. Dean is officially passed out on the couch, I take his shredded clothes and toss them away, making it so at least there was a minimal amount of blood left around him.

I take a silent seat in the recliner across from the couch, and close my eyes, feeling more relaxed, and more like I had the night before. Secure, and at a peace of mind, knowing that they were both okay without knowing why that was so important to me.  I fall asleep in a cramped balled up position on that chair, slightly registering the sound a shower starting, and a quiet snore from the man across from me.

//

Ugh, this was short, but I rather it be a quality short chapter than a long forced chapter, so oh well.

Thanks for reading!

-Sam