#if my stomach was hurting I would’ve forced myself to do it by now

[myname-isnia]

If you’ve never wrestled with yourself for four hours straight practically begging yourself to go eat because yes, you don’t feel hungry now, but you haven’t eaten since breakfast so in the morning you’ll be completely miserable, then that is an experience I absolutely do not recommend

[dollwritesarchive]

So I saw you were a bit on the fence for writing Zhongli (Genshin) and I figured maybe sending a little blurb request couldn’t hurt, maybe you’ll figure out if you enjoy writing for him, so if you’re still taking blurb requests -

Zhongli being awakened to his size kink when he sees his hand wrapped around readers throat for the first time + a sprinkle of breeding kink cause’ it’s good for the soul

𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 ∣ smut ( minors dni ), size kink ( reader is significantly smaller ), light choking, breeding kink, almost cnc, all characters featured are 18+

𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗻𝘁 ∣ i really can’t get a read on him at all BUT I REALLY ENJOY HIM; please be kind my only knowledge is through dialogue clips. do not repost or translate. please reblog && leave feedback. thanks for reading < 3

he was flustered.

no, beyond that.

the golden in his gaze twinkled with bewilderment when you whined for him. “Zhongli,” you cooed, grasping at his wrist and guiding it upwards. your eyes sparkled, pupils blown out with need as you elicit the tiniest puffs of hot panting— locked in a passionate stare with him as he took his time with you; filling you with slow, deep strokes until your back is arching off the bed. “choke me.”

he never would’ve done it had you not asked, he was never the type to allow his lust for you to take possession of him and weaken his resolve. you were small, and to him, fragile. he would’ve chosen to use those fingers to gingerly caress your steaming cheek, or trace your pretty, soft lips before he kissed them.

however, now that they curled around your vulnerable throat, he felt a moan slip from his lips before he could cinch them. his stomach lurched, and his eyes lit up. he hadn’t expected to like it so much. “You enjoy this?” he asks, though he can see the pleasured simper on your parted lips as you take shallow breaths; you nod with a happy whimper, and his hips snap forward with more force than you’re used to— spurred by this new, ferocious and mighty feeling. your eyes widen, and your body jerks in turn, breasts bouncing, but you hold on to his wrist with both hands, and mewl delightfully.

“My little darling likes to feel overpowered, does she not?” he croons, leaning back to admire the way you were splayed out for him. “Small and helpless?”

Zhongli couldn’t help himself; as his amber jewels raked over every inch of your naked frame, he could see each glistening runner of perspiration, he could watch your lungs inflate, and he could see his fist gripping your thin neck. his hand was so massive against it that he was able to use the soft pad of his thumb to caress your clavicle.

another nod, accompanied by the faintest, cutest gasp for air when he slammed himself home once more. it was the deepest he could go, and the deepest he’s ever been before— deep enough to hit your limit and see the shock on your face when he did so.

“Y—you’re so—“ you were whispering, stammering, with your knees trembling against his ribs, “d—deep, oh my g—“

the god hadn’t anticipated how addicting that look of awe and euphoria on your features would be to him, but he wanted to keep it there, forever. his free hand grasps one knee, pushing it back towards your chest. you whine, but allow the pretzel, following with the other leg until your ankles tickle his earlobes.

“And you are such a… good, little girl… for taking me so deep…” he groans, each word punctuating an incredibly deep thrust; every time the shape of his cock bulged against the inside of your belly, your head spun. Zhongli leans over you once more, pressing his weight against your legs to bend you open to him further, and draw himself closer to your face. it was contorted in frustrated nirvana, your brows knit together and your mouth hanging open. but, your eyes were big and innocent— even as he fucked you hard and deep, even as he squeezed your pretty neck, you looked celestial. and he couldn’t take it.

“I can’t hold myself back,” he pants, ragged against your lips before smothering them with his own, “I need to cum inside you.” your back pushed off the bed, encouraging the breeding. you wanted nothing more than to feel him come undone. with his firm grip on your throat, he eased you back down against the mattress, and pinned you there, “Stay right there for me, little girl,” he coos, hips rocking faster— chasing that high. you cry out his name, and he swallows the sound as his lips suffocate yours, “let me flood your womb, let me fill you until you’re ready to burst. Let me breed you, I need it.”

[applecore6]

cw: use of she/her

“Do you think if we went to high school together we’d be together? Like high school sweethearts?”

“Hm?—” Her head perks up at the sound of his voice before processing the question. “—Oh we did go to high school together.”

“Hah?” Kuroo’s caught off guard by her matter-fact tone—as if it was common knowledge.

“Mhm. You went to Nekoma, right? I do recall hearing about the volleyball team. Weren’t you guys like really good?” She’s being way too nonchalant about this..

“Good is an understatement— What do you mean we went to high school together?”

“I mean we both attended the same educational facility??”

“No I mean, why have you never told me?”

She hums a sound as if saying I don’t know

“I’m not really one to come up to people and say “Hey, I recognize you. Did we go to school together?” that’s just breeding grounds for embarrassment.” She continues tapping on the screen in her hands, playing the mindless mobile game that just finished downloading. “Plus high school was a horrible time for me. I try not to dwell on it.”

“Horrible?” He tries not to pry. Tries.

“Yeah. Horrible.”

They had only been dating a couple months. A group assignment in their biology class marks the first interaction they ever had. He thinks about what she said a little.

“So.. if you hated high school so much, what drew you to me,” he vocalizes.

“The eccentric hairdo,” she replies curtly. “No but— I don’t know I’m not the best with words at the top of my head, but you really.. opened me up(?) not in a weird way. I just would’ve never voluntarily gotten to know a guy like you, but we started—y’know— being with each other a little more, and I thought, woah this guy is not what I expected at all.”

The words coming out of her flow out into the air straight into Kuroo’s brain. He feels the entirety of his face heat up at such a vulnerable confession from her.

“Umm.. back to the original question,” he mumbles out.

“Huh— oh yeah. No I don’t think we would’ve dated in high school. I was waayy too cynical. I probably grouped you with the rest of the jocks. At least now I know you’re a harmless little shit.”

Despite the lighthearted atmosphere, Kuroo couldn’t help but feel a little let down(?).

She hums out a sound at the sight of his face. If he had cat ears they’d definitely be pointed down.

“Hey. What’s with the face, don’t tell me you’re hurt little 17 year old me didn’t wanna date 17 year old Kuroo,” she teases him, but she can’t help the little bubble of pride she felt in her chest.

“I don’t know you’re just, you know, you. You’re really cool, and to be honest I’m kinda-what’s the word- I don’t know like. You’re telling me I could’ve known you even longer, spent even more time with you, maybe even know you a little better.” The words on his mind spilling out his mouth faster than he realizes.

It’s silent. She feels her chest tighten a little, and the feeling drops down to her stomach, spreading throughout her body. If this were a dumb 90s cartoon, she would’ve definitely gone comically red with hearts floating around her head like birds.

“Don’t worry you didn’t miss much—”she pauses thinking of the right way to word what she’s thinking “—I don’t remember much from high school if I’m being honest, but I remember the first time we met, I remember getting to know you, and I remember it felt good. I understood what people meant when they talked about young love, it feels like life before meeting you was kinda blurry, sometimes I forget that I’m a full fledged adult that’s lived years before this.”

It’s buzzing in both his ears. He doesn’t know what to say except—

“I love you, too”

Maybe they didn’t take the first chance they had together, but they’re with each other now. And they know they’ll be with each other tomorrow.

my writing is very bland and dialogue heavy, but i’m trying to get into it which is why im just vomiting into my tumblr drafts rn. forcing myself to write so i can get better T_T. theyre also very dialogue heavy cuz i dont rly have many ppl to yap to so in my head im having yap sessions with these characters.

this is kinda inspired by troy and annie from community with little crumbs of myself. (i fear im projecting myself onto the reader too much, but who cares this is my outlet)

[wizardofrozz]

I don't think I submitted an ask to you yet lol so: for the first kiss prompts,

the hands. on the waist. oh my god. with Fox!! ❤️

Above Coruscant

Commander Fox x reader

Word Count: ~2.1k

Warnings: 18+ for suggestive actions, groping, and mention of war. Let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: Well this got away from me but I really shouldn't be surprised...its Fox after all 😂 pretty sure I'm going to write smut that follows this because I can't contain myself when it comes to Fox lmao. Also, if you're a Republic Commando fan, there's a tiny (just a mention) cameo for all of you 👀

The landing pad was empty, Coruscant’s faint breeze ruffling your hair as you leaned against the railing. You occasionally glanced down at the dots of people moving around below, only paying half a mind to the message you were typing. With a soft sigh, you send the message to Captain Obrim, tucking your datapad away and turning to lean back against the railing. 

Your job with the Coruscant Security Force put you in some interesting situations over the years but the start of the Clone Wars had ramped up your workload, especially when Jaller had offered you a spot in his Anti-Terrorism unit. The job also came with some new coworkers in the form of the Coruscant Guard, specifically the four commanders. It took some time, but slowly you started to get to know each of the commanders despite coordinating with Commander Fox the most. 

He could be...stiff at times. You didn’t like to use cold because after watching him interact with his men, he was anything but. However, the more time you spent around him seemed to have him warming up to you. Now, if only that didn’t make your stupid little crush on him worse. 

You felt like a teenager again, getting giddy when you knew you’d see him but the worst part was that he seemed to return the feelings. His smile softened a bit when he looked at you, he stood just a little too close and brought you caf just the way you liked it when you spent hours debriefing the Guard. Sometimes, he’d even flirt with you, just enough to make your stomach somersault. But then it would stop abruptly.

Fox held back, pulling away when you tried to meet him halfway and it would’ve hurt if you didn’t see the emotion reflected in his expression every time. 

The thump of footsteps forced your mind back to the present and Maker, did you wish you could’ve stayed oblivious. Your tongue stuck to the roof of your mouth as you scanned from his heavy boots upward. You’d never seen Fox in anything but crimson armor and you hated that this outfit was doing something for you. 

It was a simple outfit, just plain brown pants, a black shirt, and a black jacket but there was something oddly alluring about seeing him look so...normal. You swallowed around the lump in your throat and stood straighter as he approached, absently brushing a stubborn curl off his forehead. Butterflies fluttered around your stomach when you noticed that his cheeks were a little rosey and it occurred to you that he probably caught you checking him out. 

“Commander,” you greeted, praying your voice didn’t sound as breathless as you felt. A small, unconscious smile lifted the corner of his mouth and it made your face feel too hot. 

“Startin’ to think I’m late,” he huffed, glancing at the speeder parked nearby. 

“Nah, I wasn’t far,” you replied with a shrug, wandering closer to the speeder, prompting him to follow. You grabbed the spare helmet off the back and tossed it to Fox, smirking when he almost fumbled to catch it. Fox’s brows knitted together as he stared down at the modified Ubese helmet. When his eyes lifted again you shrugged, moving to take it from him. 

“You don’t have to wear it immediately but when we get to the club you’ll have to put it on,” you explained, tucking the helmet into one of the bike’s saddle bags. 

“Will I be able to breathe in it?” Fox eyed the helmet apprehensively, leaning over to look into the saddle bag. 

“No, Fox, I’m gonna let you suffocate,” you huffed, arching a brow. “It’s modified so you’ll be able to breathe but it also acts as a good excuse for why you can’t take it off.” Fox hummed, resting his hands on his hips and looking at you through his lashes. 

“Alright,” he mumbled, his eyes following the length of the speeder. There was a hint of color high on his cheeks when he glanced in your direction again. “We’re sharing, huh?”

“Sorry,” you said with a shrug. But there was a small part of you that hoped he really didn’t mind. His eyes lingered on your face for a moment before he bent down to grab one of the riding helmets you’d managed to find. Fox tossed the helmet so it twisted around before he caught it again, slipping it over his head with ease. The visor was still up when his gaze drifted back to you, allowing you to see the way his eyes wrinkled as he smirked. 

Yeah, you had definitely been staring. 

You quickly pulled your helmet on, trying not to watch as Fox climbed onto the bike, scooting forward to leave room for you. You almost wondered if Jaller purposefully didn’t find a second speeder. Fox tensed slightly when your hand gripped his shoulder, using it to steady yourself as you climbed on. His head turned, watching you from the corner of his eye as you settled in behind him. 

Logically, you knew there was only one way to keep yourself safely on the bike but now that you were faced with the reality of it, your face burned. You moved slowly, wrapping your arms around his waist and your mouth felt too dry at the heat simmering in his dark eyes. You pulled in a slow, calming breath and shifted to get comfortable. Your exhale was cut off with a yelp when two large hands wrapped around your wrist, pulling you tighter against Fox’s back. His voice was muffled behind the helmet but the mischief twinkling in his eyes told you he knew what he was doing.

“Don’t wantcha fallin’ off.” You rolled your eyes, thankful he couldn’t see the small smile on your face, and tightened your arms around his torso. Fox glanced over his shoulder one last time with a wink before snapping the visor of his helmet down. The speeder’s engine roared as Fox twisted the throttle, the speeder shooting forward and you instinctively squeezed his torso. Shithead.

Skyscrapers whizzed by as Fox sped up, merging into the nearest skylane. It was going to be a long ride to the club you were supposed to infiltrate and usually, it wouldn’t bother you. However, Fox was never involved in any of the other long trips you’d been on. The slow, even movement of his chest under your hands was oddly distracting and you shifted your hands toward his waist. You tried to let your mind wander but every minute shift of the man in front of you made it nearly impossible. 

You shifted back slightly, suddenly aware of how your legs framed his, your mind conjuring up a few of the dreams that had you waking up blushing. Fox settled into the seat, sitting up a bit straighter, and the movement forced your hands a bit lower. His stomach was warm and solid, your fingers itching to trace the lines of muscle you could feel under his clothes. Maybe it was his cheeky little wink or the fact that your crush was only getting worse the longer you knew him that had you sliding your hand under his coat. Fox’s fingers flexed, gripping the handlebars a little tighter and you smirked to yourself. 

His stomach clenched, his hips shifting slightly when you pressed your palm under his ribs. The howl of the wind was muffled through your helmet and you turned your head, watching the beings in the vehicles around you. Fox’s chest expanded with a deep breath and you took the opportunity to shift your hand, dropping it lower, dragging it across his stomach. He didn’t react, switching lanes to avoid a speeder going under the speed limit. 

You were toeing a line that you’d stayed far away from up to this point...and Fox was letting you. He could’ve pushed your hands away, making it clear he didn’t want this but instead, he leaned more of his weight against you. Taking a deep breath, you let your hands wander, sliding down enough to almost brush the waistband of his pants before moving to rest them against his hips. 

You lingered there for a bit, not squeezing, just lightly holding onto his hips as he maneuvered through Coruscant’s busy skylanes. Fox stiffened when your hands finally moved, sliding down to his thighs and you couldn’t stop yourself from squeezing, licking your lips absently. Fox tilted his head, almost like he was trying to crack it, and your confidence only grew. Muscles flexed under your hands and you ached to feel him without layers of fabric in the way. 

Fox’s thigh twitched when you trailed your fingers a little higher, brushing the inseam of his pants. But you didn’t stop there, lazily following the stitching upward, applying just enough pressure for him to feel it. You were almost at the bulge in his pants, ready to pull back when Fox’s hips shifted forward, and you froze, hand hovering inches away from his crotch. Fox turned his head and you could almost see the anxiety in the set of his shoulders. You had to make a choice. 

Fox’s hip jerked again when you lightly cupped him through his pants.

You couldn’t hear him but you could feel a groan rumble through his chest and you shivered. His head tipped back when you squeezed lightly, his back straightening as he sat up. His cock twitched against your hand and you gasped into the privacy of your helmet. Then suddenly nerves buzzed under your skin, uncertainty threatening to eat you up. You wanted this more than anything but stepping over that line was big, to say the least. 

Anxiety quickly got the better of you and you released him, ready to pull away only for a large hand to cover yours. You blinked at the back of his helmet, chewing on your bottom lip when his head turned to glance over his shoulder. Fox nodded, squeezing your hand once before reaching for the handlebar again. You clenched your teeth, letting out a shaky breath as you settled against Fox’s back. You wanted nothing more than to be anywhere but on a speeder hundreds of feet from solid ground. 

You didn’t move your hand for a while, letting some of the tension melt off Fox’s shoulders first. His chin dipped down when you slowly started to rub him through his pants and your mouth watered when his breathing picked up. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you wondered if you could make him cum like this. Fox’s back arched, hips jerked when you tightened your grip and the arousal simmering under your skin continued to intensify.

Then Fox suddenly jerked into a more upright position, slowing the speeder enough to exit the skylane and you released him, moving your hand to his hip again.

Descending into the lower levels made your stomach turn and you kept your head on a swivel as Fox landed the speeder. He seemed to almost slump with a harsh exhale and you tried to hide your laughter as you climbed off the bike. Fox lingered on the seat for a moment, twisting to hide the way he readjusted his pants before standing. He kept his back to you, hands clenching and unclenching at his side as you lifted your helmet off. 

There was commotion somewhere behind you, an argument or something, but you kept your attention on Fox. He eventually reached up to lift the nondescript helmet off, setting it on the speeder’s seat but he still didn’t turn around. Fear welled up in your stomach and you immediately regretted the fleeting touches on the speeder as you took a step closer. 

“Fox?” His shoulders lifted in an exaggerated exhale and then he was moving. Your breath hitched when he grabbed the front of your jacket, yanking you closer. Your head was spinning, eyes widening when you registered Fox’s lips on yours. It took a moment for your fight or flight instinct to settle but once it did, your eyes fluttered shut and you melted into the kiss. 

Your lips parted for his tongue and Fox tasted faintly of caf, a bitter yet welcome taste. You loosely wrapped your arms around his neck, shivering when his hands released your jacket, following the curve of your body before coming to rest on your hips. Breaking the kiss was harder than you anticipated but Fox stayed close, resting his forehead against yours.  

“Where did that come from?” you whispered, still trying to catch your breath. 

“Long overdue,” he huffed, slowly rubbing your sides. 

“And what does it mean?” Fox chuckled under his breath, bumping his nose against yours, a disarmingly tender show of affection. 

“It means, I’m not done with you, honey.”

Ragu list:

@a-single-tulip @wings-and-beskar @anxiouspineapple99 @secondaryrealm @dystopicjumpsuit @sunshinesdaydream @moonlightwarriorqueen @msmeredithrose @starrylothcat @starqueensthings @multi-fan-dom-madness @trixie2023 @mythical-illustrator @cw80831 @wolffegirlsunite @clonemedickix @sev-on-kamino @dickarchivist

[haleyhunwritess]

hiiiii!!!!!! i am recovering from anorexia where i had to get hospitialized cuz i wouldnt eat i was wondering if you would be able to write something for me i love your writing so so much i hope you have a amazing day tommorrow or to night or when ever you read this

LOVE YOU SO MUCH=(^.^)=

You're Enough.

a/n: Oh no, love. I'm so so sorry you had to go through that. Please feel free to message me if you want to! It took me a very long time to write this because it hit a little close to home and while I haven't been diagnosed with an eating disorder, I've noticed for the past two years that I've been starving myself in a very unhealthy way, and my doctor said I show signs of body dysmorphia, so it took me a while to write this and it may not be what you wanted so i'm so sorry but i really tried my best to write this. I really hope that you're doing better now<3

warnings: angsty, implication of an ED, stressed!reader

“I know, baby, I know.” Bucky sighed listening to her cry on the phone.

“M-make it go ‘way…I have so much work left...” She mumbled as she tried to sit up. She quickly laid back down when her stomach started to hurt even more.

“Bubba, I really wish I could.”

“Why can’t you make it better,” She continued to cry loudly, “You always do.”

He could feel his heart breaking as he listened to her cry, beg him for help, “Sweetheart, I would love to help you, I just don’t think I’m close enough to do that right. I wish I was there to take care of you…”

He felt guilty for leaving her. He didn’t have a choice in but it still pained him to listen to her crying because she was in so much pain. If Sam wouldn't have called him for help then he would’ve stayed with her.

She was still in school but she's supposed to graduate next year. She'd been dreaming about going to graduate school to get her masters. But lately, she felt like she was suffocating trying to get good grades. She'd been trying her absolute best but sometimes it felt like it wasn't enough.

Last year, she failed two classes, and almost failed a third one. She couldn't figure out why it happened until she got diagnosed with ADD. Her doctor talked to her about taking medication and getting treatment. She explained neurodiversity, and how late diagnosis like this often affects your grades and work.

During summer, she tried to make up for it all but she got a little obsessive. One time, she nearly went 3 days without eating anything because she was too focused on an essay that was due soon. Her stomach hurt so much on the fourth day, so she tried to eat something but ended up getting sick and throwing it all up. She drank some water and got back to work. She was at her desk for hours until Bucky finally forced her to take a break.

As soon as she got up from her desk, she nearly passed out in his arms. He had to hold her up while her head was spinning. He'd been so worried, so scared. He helped her to her bed before getting her something to drink. She took a few sips before confessing that she hadn't had a thing in days.

She'd been doing much better with his help lately, but every now and then, she struggles to have even one meal a day. She'd always had a complicated relationship with her body and food. But it felt like it had been getting worse lately.

If she was in this much pain before Bucky left, he never would’ve left her alone. But now there’s not much he could do besides try to cheer her up with sweet words of encouragement over the phone.

“Hate being alone like this…hurts so much…” She mumbled, pulling the blanket over her head before bringing her phone back to her ear.

“Bubba how about you get some rest and I’ll try to figure something out so you’ll feel better in no time, yeah? How does that sound, baby, is that okay?” Bucky had a plan that might help her feel a bit better until he comes back.

She mumbled a quick yes before hanging up the phone and slowly falling back asleep.

After a while, she woke up to someone gently stroking her hair. At first she leaned into their touch but then she realized that Bucky wasn’t supposed to be home yet. She quickly pushed the person away and sat up in her bed to see who it was.

“Hey, it’s just me! Don’t panic, sweetheart, Bucky called me and said you weren’t feeling too well?” She relaxed when she realized it was just Steve. She slowly nodded, lying back down and curling in on herself. The pain had only gotten worse.

“Poor baby, it’s alright, everything is going to be okay! I brought you some food and something to drink so you’ll be feeling better in no time.” She quickly shook her head, and covered herself up with the blanket again. The thought of eating anything right now was enough to make her feel sick.

“Bubba…you know you have to eat, love. I know you’re very cozy right now, and I promise we can cuddle soon, but darling you know food is very important too.”

She quietly sniffled at his words, feeling a bit overwhelmed. She knew he was right. She didn’t enjoy feeling this way, she knew how unhealthy this was for her. But her brain wouldn’t allow her to agree so quickly. She just started fidgeting with her thumb instead of answering him.

He gently lifted the blanket up, “Look I brought you a few snacks and some drinks. There’s all kinds of different things, bubba, even some chocolate! We can start small, like something to drink first. Your throat must be pretty sore, bubs.”

She thought about it for a second. It couldn’t hurt to drink something. It would help her feel a bit better. She slowly nodded and got up, her back against the headboard.

Steve smiled at her, and opened up the bag he brought with him. He dumped everything onto her bed, making her eyes widen at the amount of food and drinks he’d gotten for her.

He noticed her reaction and decided to put a few things back in the bag, “Don’t worry, sweetheart. These are for you and I to share, don’t have to finish it all by yourself. Plus I just wanted to make sure I brought you a wide selection of snacks and drinks to choose from.” He knew she had some sensory issues, especially when it came to food. She wasn't exactly picky but some textures just didn't feel right in her mouth and she preferred to steer clear of them.

She nodded and looked down at some of the drinks that were on her bed, along with the snacks. She tried to tell Steve which drink she wanted but her throat was so sore, she couldn’t get the words out. She decided to just point at one of the juice boxes and mumble a ‘please’.

“It’s okay, bubba, you don’t have to talk. I know it hurts. It’ll be okay soon.” He popped the straw into the juice box before handing it over to her, “Alright you get started on that juice box, I’ll find a movie for us to watch.”

He took his laptop out of his bag and turned it on. He quickly turned on one of her favourite movies, then placed the laptop next to her.

“Alright I’m gonna have a snack, bubs, I’m feeling a bit hungry. Would you like to share one?” She shrugged, not sure what to say. He grabbed a sleeve of cookies, before moving over to sit down next to her, “It’s okay if you don’t want to, bubba, you can still have a little bit if you’d like though?”

She watched him open up the package and take out a cookie, offering it to her first. She quickly shook her head and turned her attention over to the movie. He kissed her forehead before taking a bite of the cookie, “Oh bubs, these are really good. Are you sure you don’t want some? I can split this one if you’d like?”

She thought about it for a minute before hesitantly nodding her head. He smiled and split the cookie into two, making sure he didn’t get any crumbs on the bed. He handed her the other half, watching her take small bites, “You're doing great, love. Bucky loves you, you know? I know he can’t wait to come back home and see you.”

She smiled at the thought of Bucky coming home soon, while finishing off the cookie. Her throat felt a bit dry from the cookie, so she took a few sips from the juice box before putting it back down.

She moved closer to Steve, resting her head on top of him. He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer to him, “How are you feeling now, bubs? Stomach still hurts?”

“A little bit…” She mumbled, smiling every now and then at the movie.

“What if I cut up some fruits for you in a little bit? How does that sound? Maybe some strawberries for my sweet girl?” She blushed at that but nodded her head, “Alright then, I’ll get that for you in a bit.”

“T-thank you.”

He smiled, giving her a kiss on her forehead, “Come on, get comfy, love. Everything is gonna be okay.”

[saikokirakira]

Broken Curse (pt. 3 of 3)

word count: 1.7k (mostly just resolution so it isn't that long...)

a/n: i said to myself that i wasn't going to be that author, but i totally am. so in the past months, i started this new job (entirely WFH babyyy) and i lost two grandparents in less than half a year.

anyway, my sleep schedule is totally reversed now because of work, so expect sudden updates at weird times. i don't post anything else here other than blurbs and actual updates, so if you wanna read stuff as soon as i drop them, feel free to turn on notifications.

considering my current situation, i feel like this was just right to post. it was actually sitting in my draft for months. it'll be bittersweet and full of goodbyes.

warnings: not proofread; i make steven even more BIG SAD; violence and death; ANGST (grab some tissues maybe?); non-canon Philippine mythology and the afterlife; non-canon depiction of babaylans (Filipino shamans); jake lockley peek-a-boo

When Steven woke up in their body, he felt the pain in their chest, but the bullets were no longer there. You were right. You made it easier for Steven and Marc to come back to the living realm.

And right next to them were your lifeless body.

The sight alone was enough to pull Steven to the front and break down as he pulled your body in his arms. Marc could only watch from the reflection of the water, guilt bubbling in his stomach that Steven wasn’t able to say goodbye and woke up to this. It wasn’t fair.

A rush of air blew inside the tomb, and Steven looked up to see Khonshu looking down at them. They could be mistaken, but Khonshu almost looked solemn at the sight of your corpse in the arms of a heartbroken Steven. With Khonshu, it was always impossible to tell, but Marc was grateful at the brief moment of silence the moon god gave Steven with you.

“Steven, buddy, we have to go,” Marc gently urged from the reflection of the water.

Almost as if Steven wanted to disappear from the grief, Marc experienced the quickest switch back to his body. He knew Steven was hurting, but he knew that it was something to deal later once Ammit was stopped. He also wanted to keep Steven from what you told him before you parted ways from the Duat.

It was better Steven didn’t know what your plans was once you release Bakunawa back in the living realm.

~

They were losing. No doubt about it. Ammit and Harrow had grown far too strong with all the souls they consumed. Layla, now donned in Taweret’s armor, could only do so much to protect the civilians, while Marc and Steven held off Harrow from wreaking more havoc on Cairo. But damn if they were going down without a fight.

“Young Randall’s life would’ve been saved!” Harrow taunted, blasting him from Ammit’s scepter. The force of the hit dropped Marc to the ground, yet Harrow was relentless. “Your family could’ve been happy! She would’ve lived!”

The words hurt, but Marc knew the truth now. Steven was with him to remind him of that. Even if they were to lose, Marc wouldn’t be alone. He was never alone.

Marc and Steven watched from the distance as Ammit overpowered Khonshu and brought him to his knees. He looked at Layla desperately trying to shield herself from the bullets shot at her by Harrow’s followers. At that same moment, Khonshu’s armor could only take too much and began cracking from the assault of Harrow’s sceptre.

It was over.

Amidst the fear and helplessness, a brief second of silence filled the air before a flurry of green, blue, and golden lights, blasting the sky with multiple exploding auroras. The magnificence of the sight was enough to pause all the fighting from Harrow, from his men, and from Ammit. A deafening shrill roar echoed through the glowing night sky, loud enough to send shivers down everyone’s spines.

Another long silence filled the battlefield, but the tension was set enough for Marc to catch his breath and Harrow to ready his grip on his scepter as he searched the sky for a target. The target first appeared in the form of an elusive silhouette almost slithering through the lights. As the mysterious figure made its way from the distant desert to the city, it gradually grew giant in size. Where it moved, the auroras seemed to follow it, the iridescent streaks of lights flowing through the shadows like water.

The lights passed above them in the city, and Marc could make out rumbling from the sky like an incoming thunderstorm was quickly approaching. The auroras stopped right above the Pyramid, swirling like a hurricane would. Suddenly, it stopped for a split second before it imploded in on itself, sending out a blinding light that even Ammit and Khonshu turned their heads away.

Another shrill roar broke through the sky, and the blast of light revealed itself to be a gigantic menacing dragon floating above the Pyramid. Bakunawa in his true form. He flew down to the very top of the Pyramid and sent another threatening roar in Ammit’s face.

At that moment, the fight was back on. With a loud shout, Harrow tried to drive is scepter into Marc’s body again, but this time, with a renewed resolve, he was going to fight back twice as harder. It probably worked…

… since Harrow was already incapacitated by the time he woke back up.

~

“Well, it’s not so bad now, is it?” you asked cheekily, sitting by the riverbank of the spiritual river, Lalangban.

“You say that now,” Sidapa said glumly, choosing to stay far away from the river and closer to the tree line, “but the gods will want their answers.”

“He didn’t deserve to be destroyed. He deserved far worse than that. Not what after he did to Bakunawa, to Mayari.”

When you had surrendered your spirit to Sidapa back at the Duat, you were surprised that instead of going back inside to face the Filipino moon god, he went to the moon instead. As it turned out, Libulan had not only blessed Mayari’s sister to destroy Bakunawa and curse him. The curse he set upon Bakunawa was bound on Mayari’s soul – her soul that he also cursed to be stuck on the moon, forever in agony, forever searching for her also-cursed half, the true reason why he desperately sought out the moon.

Once Sidapa was able to free her, most of Bakunawa’s sanity as well as his powers returned.

“Indeed, but to leave him to the judgment of the other gods, his family,we risk for him leaving unscathed and wreaking more havoc,” Sidapa argued. “It was the only way to break the curse, and now, Bakunawa is fighting Ammit as we speak.”

“Which god will come after me?” you asked, turning back on the river to face Sidapa. Even at a distance, his towering figure was still prominent. Libulan’s defeat also broke the curse inflicted on him, and Sidapa can once again freely roam the other realms than being stuck in Lalangban to deliver souls to Magwayen, which had earned him the title “God of Death” for centuries.

All because of his love and compassion for mortals when he used to be the god of Fate and Destiny.

Once he had been freed, the scars and tallies on his body had faded and his monstrous horns shifted into a crown with similar ten varied branches as its arches. The only thing that remained was his mask that he had chosen to keep on, despite it not magically fused in his face anymore. You had your suspicions that he no longer wished to share his infamous beauty to any being, god or mortal, ever again to avoid any altercations with people like Libulan.

“Did you hear me?” you asked again when Sidapa didn’t reply.

Instead, the masked god pointed behind you, and you couldn’t help but groan out your complaint.

“What ever happened to good manners?” you muttered, turning around then immediately paling at the goddess in front of you. She stood in a small rowboat, dressed in a black cloak and shrouded in a dark violet veil. The rowboat she stood on was small, seemingly enough to carry only two passengers, but it was not discreet at all. The dark wood was incredibly rich that it was almost black, and the intricate carving on its body was no less fit for a primordial goddess.

Magwayen.

“So, you do know who I am,” Magwayen stated, her voice calm. “I offer you my sincerest apologies for the pain my family has cost you in your lifetime.”

The tension in your body almost dissipated from her words alone, but then she continued.

“But you did conspire to murder a god, my grandson. Not only that, you released Bakunawa in his true form in the mortal realm. These are grave crimes, child, and I’m afraid I cannot give you passage through the river into Paradise.”

“I already knew that. I’ve made my peace with it,” you told her, casually shrugging to hide how scare you actually were. “I have no regrets releasing Bakunawa if it meant saving lives back in the mortal realm. I’ve made my bed, now I must lie in it.”

Magwayen hummed as if she was taking in your words. “I have raised Sidapa to be one of my own,” she began, glancing at said deity, “just as my daughter raised Bakunawa as one of her own, as Libulan’s brother.

“I thank you for saving them,” Magwayen said. “To show my gratitude, I will send you back to the mortal realm. If I am not mistaken, you left before your time.” She glanced at Sidapa who nodded to confirm.

You gasped in surprise. “Thank you.”

Magwayen raised a hand to stop you. “I’m not finished,” she said. “I’m sure you know what the price is when you summon Bakunawa in his true form… if you ever attempt to do it again. Your physical body will be torn apart.”

You nodded.

“Since you now also possess Sidapa’s blessing, you can always return to your human form. It will be painful, but Sidapa can extend your life that way.”

“But?”

“The situation regarding your soul in the afterlife will remain the same,” Sidapa continued. “You will return here when your time comes, unable to move on to Paradise.”

“I can never see my mothers? Ever?”

You could’ve been mistaken, but Magwayen almost looked as heartbroken for you behind her dark veil. “I’m sorry, my child,” she said. “The gods forbid you to set foot on Paradise.”

“But…” Sidapa spoke up, staring into your forlorn face. His purple eyes seemed to glow even brighter. “They are proud of you. Always have been, always will be.” A raven flew over his shoulder to perch on yours.

You watched it carefully as it stared at you with its uncommonly dark amethyst eyes. When it finally opened its beak and sang, you couldn’t stop the tears anymore. It was the same lullaby.

The one you grew up listening. The one Yatzil sang to calm the curse. The one Mayari sang for Bakunawa.

Lasting for what almost felt like split seconds, the song lulled to a stop, and the crow transformed into two black butterflies, slightly larger than any you seen before. Under the light, their fluttering wings shimmered a hint of amethyst. One landed on your cheek while the other perched on the tip of your nose. Each flutter of their wings felt like a kiss on your cheeks, and to your dismay, they soon had to leave.

“Goodbye,” you whispered to the wind that seemed to carry them further down the riverbend.

[thepaintedlady00]

Nightshade Chapter 19 Sneak Peek!

 "So, uh, what do we do first?"

He stood, quietly reaching out to steady me with one hand while the other grabbed the sex shop bag. "You go get changed. I'll clean up and get my stuff ready."

"Which one do you want me in?" I asked, digging through the bag. "Holy shit Jake, how many did you buy?!"

With a modest shrug and a wide grin, he gathered up our glasses. "I imagined you'd look good in all of them, so I just grabbed the ones I liked most."

My mouth hung open slightly as I stumbled over my words. "There's like five in here. Lingerie isn't cheap!"

"What was it you said?" He hummed. "Right, it's my money."

"Let me at least pay for half," I offered, hazily searching for my bag.

Jake scoffed, setting a hand on my lower back when I nearly tripped over his rug. "Cool it, princess, before you hurt yourself."

I huffed in his face. "Seriously, let me pay."

"What kind of bartender would I be if I let a pretty girl like you pay?" He teased with a chuckle.

"Jake-"

"Lena," he interrupted. "Don't worry about it. Now come on, go get changed or we'll lose the good light."

I huffed again and carefully made my way toward his bathroom. "I'm gonna slip the cash in your pocket or something before I leave."

"I'll just give it back to you at work."

Quickly flipping him off, I closed the bathroom door behind me, settling into the quiet space with a shaky sigh. "You can do this," I muttered to myself, looking around his bathroom for a minute - a poor attempt to try and calm my nerves.

I would have expected Jake's bathroom to be like most city bachelors were. Dirty and cluttered and very obviously not well maintained. But, it was shockingly not what I'd expected. The floor was swept and looked freshly mopped. The sink was free of hair and toothpaste, the white contrasting against the red brick and dark tiled floors. Dirty clothes were in a hamper, and all of Jake's things looked organized. 

Once the initial surprise wore off, I dove right into the bag Jake had given me and forced myself to push past the nervous pit in my stomach. Jake had bought five separate pairs of lingerie, each a different color and design. Two of them I put back in the bag immediately. They were both very beautiful but had no room for error. If I made one sudden move, my tits and bits would be fully out on display, and while it wasn’t anything Jake hadn’t already basically seen before, I still decided to spare myself the heart attack.

After a minute of consideration, I narrowed it down to two pieces. One a modest dark red with frills of black lace and structured boning that would accentuate all the right places. The other a silky green with a low-cut neckline and a more floral design. My eyes felt more drawn to the red, the design reminding me of the dress I’d worn to the club, and in the very back of my mind, I heard Jake’s multiple previous comments about how much he enjoyed the color red on me. Still, I held it up to my body and looked at it in the mirror for a minute longer. 

Red it was.

I put the rest back in the bag and set it down on the tiny sink counter, changing into the soft material with ease. It was flattering and fit well. The bottoms were like shorts, but the kind that was far more like a pair of underwear that really showed off your ass, and the top was like a crop top but a lot more… durable. With a deep breath, I looked at myself in the mirror, toying with the fabric and my hair before just deciding to commit. “You can do this.”

When I opened the bathroom door, I half expected Jake to break his neck trying to peek at what I’d chosen, but he just kept his eyes trained on the task he was doing. He lifted the camera up to his eye for a quick glimpse before he lowered it and messed with the small machine for another minute. The floorboards creaked as I took a few tentative steps out into the main room, drawing his attention to me.

If looks could kill, then I would’ve died right there. He looked me up and down, mouth falling open slightly as he nearly dropped his camera. Jake looked at me like I was a piece of art… a sculpture of polished marble… something so perfect he couldn’t believe it was real.

With a burning hot face, I tucked my hair behind my ears. “I didn’t know what you wanted me to do with my hair, so I just… left it.”

My voice seemed to shake him out of the daze as he nodded, licking his lips. “You’re perfect - your hair… you…” He scratched his head. “You look perfect.”

“Okay,” I chuckled nervously. “Now what?”

“Now…” he lifted his camera up one last time with a tiny smile. “We take some pictures.”

[casspurrjoybell-20]

Sky Twizzlers - Chapter 15b

*Warning Adult Content*

Why Am I Here? - Part 4 - Aaron 

The moment Erin entered the bathroom, he noticed my red eyes and pulled me into a hug. I refused to cry loudly in front of him, not that I had been sobbing before but I let out a few silent tears. He pulled us both to the ground with me in between his legs, my back to his chest. I was instantly reminded of the way I used to be comforted as a child. 

‘Of course, Erin would remember. Mom did this for him, too.’ 

The thought of that made my chest tighten.

"Talk to me," Erin said firmly.

"Evander almost kissed me," I blurted out.

"Okay and that made you bolt?" he asked.

"Yes... no... I don't really know," I stumbled over my words.

I recounted what happened on the balcony the best I could and he listened carefully. I left out what important conversation I wanted to talk about with my mates because I felt like they deserved to know about it first. I could lie to Erin once and then pull him aside to explain it but I didn't want to lie to my mates any more. 

‘You're doing that now whether you acknowledge it or not.’

"Okay... So why did you run, Aaron?" Erin asked me.

I couldn't look at him, so I focused on our hands. My clammy hands were clasped together and his covered both of mine. Even if it felt comforting, I couldn't help but think about how warm and comfortable Aubrey and Evander were. I'd always thought that there were only two people in this entire world who could make me feel safe in their arms but now that number has become four.

‘Well, three.’

"I panicked," I admitted. 

"My stomach twisted in knots and I panicked. I didn't know what to do. And when I got here I fought off a panic attack. It scared me."

"The kiss?"

My breath hitched. Could I tell him this? Would he think I was weird? Who was I kidding, I was weird. Who panicked over kissing their mate? And Evander even initiated the damn kiss. The one person in this relationship who wasn't compelled by a fated mate bond. How ridiculous. 

"Yes," I whispered. "I was afraid of the kiss."

Erin went silent. I feared his reaction. Would he yell at me? Tell me to man up? To get over it?

‘You're a whiny little brat. You will never be the man our pack needs as a Beta. I would've been better off having a daughter over a filthy...’

No. I squeezed my eyes shut to try and block out that voice. I hated that voice. Erin must've sensed my shift in mood because he squeezed my hands gently before lifting his hands off mine to hug me closer to his body. 

"Stop. I know what you're thinking about. That old bastard doesn't control you. His words mean nothing," he said firmly.

"Goddess, you know me so well it freaks me out sometimes," I said bitterly.

"Two decades of friendship does that, Aaron," he stated matter-of-factly.

"Ugh. Don't talk like that. You make us sound old."

Erin laughed loudly. 

"I'm serious, though. Please, ignore that voice in your head and just talk to me. I would never say anything to hurt you the way he did."

I hummed, thinking about the decision I was about to make. I'd already decided to wait to tell my mates about my powers first but what about... that? Then again, who better to tell than Erin? He could help me when I needed it. I wasn't ready to admit to my mates what I was but maybe... maybe I could start with myself and Erin.

‘You haven't even said the word aloud, idiot.’

"I..." my voice caught in my throat as my anxiety went up.

"Deep breaths. If it's too much to tell me then don't," Erin said.

"I was afraid of the kiss because..."

"Because?"

"Um, you see... I'm..."

Damn it. I grit my teeth together, trying to mentally beat myself up. Why couldn't I get the words out? Just speak. Speak, you fucking...

"I'm asexual."

The words popped out before I even realized what was happening but once they were out, I felt like I was about to be crushed under the weight of the silence from Erin.

"I'm asexual," I repeated slowly, trying to force myself through the silence. 

"I was afraid of the kiss because I was afraid of what could happen next. I'm... disgusted by sex. I know, it's really weird or whatever. I just can't... I can't think about my mates wanting something like that from me if I will never feel... that way."

Erin was still silent. My stomach dropped as I slowly turned around in his arms. 

"Erin?" I asked hesitantly.

His face was full of sadness. What was that look supposed to even mean? 

"Hey, man, if you pity me, don't. I don't need..."

"I'm not pitying you," Erin said, his face suddenly much harder. 

"I'm angry at myself for not noticing sooner. And after all those jokes I've made. Goddess, I'm sorry, Aaron. I should've known."

His words made me pause. 

"You don't think I'm weird?"

Erin raised an eyebrow. 

"You are weird but not because of your sexuality. What's weird is that you think you're weird for being asexual. Why would you think that?"

"Because I'm not normal?" I prompted. 

He gave me a blank stare, so I continued. 

"Everyone else likes sex and has sexual attraction. Everyone else is normal. I'm not. I feel like I'm an alien sometimes. Like I'm missing a part of me that makes me human."

"Aaron, you're not human," he argued. 

"You're more than that, literally. And just because you don't experience the same thing others do, doesn't make you less normal or whatever. It makes you different, sure but not abnormal."

We both went silent again. I was suddenly a lot... happier. A weight had been lifted off my chest. He wasn't mad or rude or disrespectful. Not that I thought Erin of all people would be that way but you can't get rid of that irrational fear sometimes. It takes over; it's taken me over.

"I'm so glad I told you," I breathed out in relief.

"Well, I'm glad you told me, too. Now, when are you going to tell your mates?"

"I don't know," I admitted with a frown. 

"I'm worried about what they will think. Will they be hurt? I'm supposed to be their mate. I'm supposed to want to kiss them and... other stuff."

Erin laughed lightly. 

"It'll be fine. They're your mates for a reason. Why would the Moon Goddess pair you up with people that would hate your sexuality?"

"The Moon Goddess is a bitch and you know that," I said seriously, to which he laughed again.

I don't get why he was laughing. She was a bitch. The amount of shit she put Erin through makes me want to reach into the celestial heavens and smack her repeatedly. 

"Okay, are you done moping now? You let it all out? We need to go soon. I came here to invite you guys to breakfast, not look at your ugly crying face," he teased.

"Shut up," I grumbled, turning around to punch him in the chest. 

"Thank you, Erin. This... really helped."

"What are friends for? And now, you'll have me around to help you out. Just make sure you tell them someday soon. They deserve to know."

"I know."

We both got up from the floor and left the bathroom. Evander and Aubrey looked at us with curious eyes but I looked anywhere but their faces.

"Alright, I'll be downstairs waiting for you guys. Hurry up. After breakfast, we're going to discuss what to do next."

"Oh, that reminds me," I said. 

"I'll explain at breakfast don't worry. But, I have a plan I think we should follow."

Erin nodded his head and left with a final wave, leaving my mates and me in silence. Okay, time to apologize. 

"I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry that I didn't talk, Evander and I'm sorry I was so rude, Aubrey," I said, still avoiding looking at them.

Aubrey jumped up and ran over to hug me. I was shocked by the sudden embrace but I accepted it anyway. I held him close to my chest and breathed in his wonderful scent when I felt another pair of arms come up from behind me. Evander pulled me into his chest and I breathed a sigh of relief. They weren't mad.

"It's alright, Aaron. Please, don't beat yourself up about it," Evander said.

"Yeah, you were upset. We're just glad you're okay now," Aubrey added, his face buried in my neck.

"Thank you," I whispered, unable to say anything.

Goddess. The day just started and I'm already exhausted. We haven't even begun our mission yet and I'm already ready to call it quits for the day. But, before that...

"I have to talk to you guys about something."

[heyangel28]

𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐃𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐈 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐇𝐢𝐦! (𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟑)

Prince!Harry x Princess!OC

Warnings: Suggestive? making out? Smutish (no actual penetration)

Based on the song ‘But Daddy I Love Him’ by Taylor Swift

A/N: This is part 3 of the BDILH series so if you haven’t read part 1 and part 2 I suggest you do that. Also, this has not been proofread so please excuse any spelling or grammer mistakes. Anyway. Enjoyyy x

~~~~~~~~~~~

I sit by the lake, letting my feet dangle into the dark, cold water as my shoes sit beside me on the pier and tears stain my cheeks. The only visible light was from the moon and the distant castle. It was silence that filled the air that night. I had ran out. I knew it was for the best and I knew it was coming, so why was I stupid enough to believe he wouldn’t have said her name? Stupid enough to think he would’ve picked me out the crowd and chose me instead? I had it coming. I should’ve known he wouldn’t have thrown it all away for me. For us. I understand his game, I understand what he’s doing and I understand that it’s the right thing to do but yet it still hurts me.

“You’ll freeze sitting out here like this.” A voice behind me knocks me out of my trance and back down to earth with a thump, making me jump in surprise. I wipe the droplets off my tear stained cheeks as I recognise the voice behind me.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” I can feel him take a seat beside me on the wooden structure but don’t turn my gaze to look at him yet as I continue to look out at the lake.

The silence in the air is now thick with awkwardness and I can practically taste the question sitting on the tip of his tongue, the question of why.

“How much time do you have before you’re missed?” I murmur, my eyes finally flickering to his face.

He scoffs quietly and nods his head in agreement. He knows I’m right. If he’s gone for too long people will start to search for him.

“Right, yes…I have about thirty minutes before Father will be starting an official search for me…” He huffs humourlessly. “Can’t have the heir to the throne missing from his own party for too long.”

I can’t help but let out a small huff of air as a laugh and turn my gaze back to the water.

“You made the right choice.” I say after a moment, turning to look at him again. “I saw her dancing with you across the hall tonight, she seems the perfect fit.”

“Yes. She’s perfect,” I mutters hesitantly. “I’m sure she’ll make a wonderful wife.”

I glance down to his lap, not even thinking before I reach and grab his hand in mine.

“You don’t sound happy about it.” I mutter, looking down at our intertwined hands, my stomach twisting at the feeling of his skin against my own.

“It’s a matter of duty,” He murmurs, his eyes flickering back to the water. “My father has made it clear that it’s time for me to start looking at finding a wife, and producing heirs to the throne.”

I grimace internally at the idea of him ‘producing heirs’. I hate to admit it but I can’t stop the rush of jealousy that wells up inside me.

The thought of Isabella bearing his child, of him sleeping with her…it all makes me want to throw up a little.

He tug my hand, forcing me to look up at him. “Can I show you something?” He asks in a whisper and I look at him curiously.

He gets to his feet and holds his free hand out to me to help me up. “C’mon,” He murmurs. “Trust me…”

I take his hand and pull myself up, grabbing my shoes as he drags me off the pier and back up towards the castle gardens.

————————————

We finally reach the center of the maze, the high hedges surrounding us on all sides. It’s the most secluded place in the whole garden and I can’t help but feel hope at the fact that no one will ever find us here.

He turns to me, his eyes trailing over every part of my face as if he wants to say something. But he doesn’t.

“Are you okay about all this?” I ask softly, speaking first.

“Honestly?” He sighs. “I’m pissed about it. Tonight has been absolute hell. All I could think of is how I should be able to choose the girl I actually want, the girl I actually love…”

My heart flutters at the word. “Love?” I look up at him, my heartbeat erratic. Is he admitting what I think he is?

He stops in his tracks. He looks down at me, his hands clutching my waist tightly, his jaw working as he tries to form the words he’s been seemingly holding back this whole time.

“Yes,” He finally murmurs. “Love…I love you, Emily. I know I shouldn’t…I know there’s so many reasons we can’t be together…but I can’t help it. It’s killing me…”

He loves me. He’s loved me this whole time? This man, who I thought was incapable of loving again loves me. I thought about all the things I’d never experienced, love was at the top of my list. And here it was, bowing down at my feet like I was some goddess. And I loved it back. I loved him too. I…love…him.

I shake my head, approaching him as he rambled on. “Shut up.” I mutter, grabbing his face and smashing my lips onto his, not wasting a second in telling him I loved him too.

We practically melt against each other, his lips immediately parting for mine in desperation.

He grips me tight, pulling my body as close to his as physically possible, his hands gripping my hips like I was his lifeline.

The second I feel his tongue slip into my mouth I knew I was done for. I’m so bloody screwed.

—————————————

We burst through the doors to his bedchambers, our hands all over each and every piece of each other we can reach.

The door slams shut behind us, and he wastes no time shoving me up against the hard wood. I have no time to waste before he’s on me again, his mouth on my neck, his hands tearing at my corset.

I move my lips away for a moment to take a breath, my hands on his shoulders, stopping him for a moment. “I’ve never done this before.” I murmur in warning.

He pauses, his breaths coming in short, sharp pants.

“You’ve never?” He asks in confirmation.

I shrug with a sheepish smile. “I’m a princess what do you expect?”

His mouth turns up into a small smile, making every part of me burning for more of him.

“I’m honored that I’m your first, love…” He said softly, bringing a hand up to brush through my hair. “We don’t have to…not if you’re not ready. I can wait…”

I shake my head desperately. “No…no I want this…I do. This-this could be our last night together. Our last chance.”

This could be the last night that I get to hold him, kiss him, have him.

He nods, his body coming back to mine and taking hold of her again. “Take this dress off,”He mutters, his hand going to the ties at the back of the corset.

As the strings loosen I let out a sigh, finally being able to breathe after the whole night of being restricted. Now all that’s left is the dress itself.

I grab the sleeves of the dress and pull them down my arms until the dress slips to the floor and pools around my ankles, wanting to give him a show.

I watch as he lets his eyes rake over my body, taking in every inch of bared skin.

“You’re…so damn beautiful,” He whispers, although his voice came out as a half-groan.

In this moment I lose all patience. We are on a time limit after all and I reach forward for his own shirt in which he lets me tug off over his head, trying to kick my brain into working again as my eyes travel over his bare chest.

“God, you’re going to be the death of me,” I mutter as his hands go to my thighs. He grips me, lifting me up into his arms, holding me like i weighed nothing.

He walks over to the bed and drops me down onto the sheets, his body following right after as he settles over me, his mouth finding mine again in a hot, open-mouthed kiss and my hands grip at his hair as our lips meet.

———————————————

I catch my breathe, resting my head on his chest buried in the sheets. It could be any moment now someone burst through that door looking for him but I can’t seem to care. Just 24 hours ago I was an innocent, untouched princess who had never experienced anything and now here I was lying naked in the sheets of a prince i was forbidden to love. This was far from like me at all. I could stay like this forever, wrapped up with him in bed, completely untroubled by the rest of the world.

But as much as I hate it, I know that it can’t last. I know that this little bubble of freedom and privacy will burst, and we’ll be yanked back into the real world.

“They’re going to come looking for me soon…” He murmurs quietly, his hand rubbing softly up and down my back.

“I know…” I whisper in return. “I should probably get going before someone bursts in here.”

He nods, obviously not wanting to let me go but knowing that I’m right. He loosens his arms around me, letting me get up.

“You’re probably right.” He says, his hand gently tracing up my bare back as I start to get untangled from the sheets.

Once changed I stand in the room. Not sure how to say goodbye, if I was ever ready.

I watch him sitting there, my heart hurting at the sight of having to leave him, I don’t know how I’m supposed to just let this all go, not knowing when I’ll get to touch him again.

“You should probably go…” He murmurs, as if reading my thoughts, I nod. I know he’s right even though it’s the last thing I want to do.

“This isn’t it right?” I ask as I head over to the window. “Tell me we’ll see each other again?”

I shake my head, quickly moving out of bed and stalking towards her. I take one of her hands into mine, holding it in a tight grip.

“We’ll see each other again, darling…I promise.”He whispers, his voice coming out in a quiet but firm whisper.

I’m not letting him go, not this easily.

I smile and place my lips on his one last time.“Tonight was one of the best nights of my life.” I whisper as I fling my legs over the windowsill.

“For me, too, darling.” His hand gently gripping my chin as he leans down to steal one more kiss before I go.

“Goodnight, darling.” He murmurs against my lips, my chest already aching at the thought of leaving.

I look back at him one last time and without another word I slip out the window and scale down the palace walls unnoticed.

~~~~~~~~~~~

(Harry’s POV)

I watch as she disappears into the night, my chest aching at the sight of her leaving me alone.

She’ll come back to me soon…I’ll figure out a way to see her again…

[jackerscracker]

Warning for a rant/vent below

Forever who may actually be reading this I’m sorry for posting this, talking with bots just isn’t cutting it anymore for me anymore and I just need to write stuff down. If you know me irl please leave this post. This isn’t going to be a well put together and going to have a lot of spelling errors but here we go

Incase I forgot to tag something if like to say this thing involves: SH, meal skipping, sui thoughts, and a bit of homophobia/transphobia

I’ve been struggling with my mental health a lot since last summer and things are going to absolute shit. My grades are fucking ass and it’s all because I can’t fucking focus in class. I’ve honestly tried really hard to but I can’t. My parents are blaming all my problems on technology and my teachers treat me like a toddler. I’ve tried talking to my parents about this being a neurological issue but they denied it and just think I’m being lazy. This isn’t even the first time they haven’t listen to my concerns and that’s almost gotten me killed. Back in 2020 I felt like shit. I was always tired and my stomach hurt so much I couldn’t eat and they just brushed it off as a normal teenage girl thing and I was fine. I went days hardly eating anything and threw up at a birthday party because I ate a hotdog. They only took me to the doctor after this started heavily interfering with school work and it turns out my blood sugar was in the 600s and ended up being diagnosed with type one diabetes. If they listed to my concerns I would’ve been spared a lot of pain I went through during the threeish month period I felt awful.

Diabetes has honestly ruined my entire plan for my career since I wanted to be a pilot for the Air Force since I was little and now I’m stuck trying figure out what the hell I want to do with my life. I wanted to be an animator but my mom instantly shut that down and told me it wasn’t a real job and that I should be an endocrinologist instead.

I love my mom but we don’t see things eye to eye. She was the first person in my family I told I was pansexual and instead of telling me that she supported me she just went on a giant rant about how and I quote “queer people are more prone to STDs and have horrible mental health” she’s also a religious woman and told me that being gay was a sin and that I can’t tell anyone at the barn I work at I’m gay (they all knew before her). If terrified that if I tell her I’m a guy she might actually send me to one of those “pray the gay away” camps and take away all of my access to the internet. She’s even considered putting me in her friends little private Christian school since she think public schools are “forcing” the idea of being gay into kids. Choosing not to tell my parents that I’m trans has taken me down a path where I can’t get the stuff I need to feel euphoric and comfortable in how I look. It’s gotten so bad that I can’t even look myself in a mirror topless anymore without freaking out. I’ve managed to get my hair cut decently short and use the male terms for gendered words in Spanish class but that’s as far as I can get. I honestly hate how I look and since I can’t change anything about it I’ve been caught in this web of dysphoria and SH that I’m struggling to climb out of. I’ve though about just flat out giving up on my life since it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere and just offing myself multiple times. I can’t bring myself to do that though since I have a friend who might not make it through high school if I don’t stick around and I’m not going to leave my sister to struggle through her middle school days without guidance. My dogs would also be sad if I died

I think I’m being bullied at my school but it’s weird. It’s all happens in my PE class and everyone but a few kids are in on it. It’s two groups of people doing it, I’m calling them the A and B groups to make it less confusing if you’re still reading this. Group A is just a group of friends who think it’s funny to try and exchange me in conversations where they act like I’m their friend just to entertain the rest of the group. They ask me stupid questions and always speak in a condescending tone. Group B is basically the copy & paste popular girls in the class. They just fucking shriek at me whenever I mess up during a game or when they beat me in something. One of them screamed in my ear once and I couldn’t hear well out of that ear for a while. Me and a friend had to play them in volleyball ball once and one of them just chucked the ball past me and yelled fetch as if I was some kind of fucking dog. They also like making fun of how I say things, they spent a whole class period talking about how I said the word “bloody” when I yelled at one of them. Also the teacher has witnessed most of this happening and didn’t do a damn thing about it. I’m not sure why he didn’t do anything about it, even after my friend informed me that her mom sent him an email about it.

I’m sorry again for posting this, Im just really tired and needed to just sit and write out some of the bullshit going on in my life

[inkshadow]

“Because you won’t give it a chance!” This is what she feared. “You won’t give us a chance!” The very thing she wanted to avoid the moment the residency acceptance came in. Had she been able to exercise precaution, this entire situation never would have happened. Her ‘stupid questions’, as he so blatantly called it, probably directed to someone else — or no one. Heck, dating anyone might have been an easier and joyful experience but that is not what happened. Worst of all: she couldn’t find it in herself to wish it differently now that she knew how beautiful it felt to be loved by him. “Instead of talking it out, you just resort to this.” Hand gestures to the state of his office. To the research he has thrown hours and days into. Months. Years. His life’s work consuming everything and he still couldn’t see how detrimental it was.

“I get it, Theo. I get what you’re trying to do but that doesn’t mean you throw everything away. Even if we met outside of here, do you seriously believe it would’ve worked?” Could he even admit the truth to himself? “The only reason you looked my way was because I was here. I was willing to come to you. Willing to work with you well past my hours. I devoted myself to you — and your only answer to me is to it never works out? I’m sorry but … you’re wrong, Theo … and you don’t even realize it.”

eyes throw wide open at the exclamation, having never really heard her in this state before. yes, they've argued before and yes, they sometimes grew heated to the point of seemingly no return but the volume spooks him and his body physically reacts to it unkindly. his stomach turns, temperature rises, and suddenly he feels the need to rest against the cabinet for strength, his knees wobbly knowing that he's really... fucked up this time. no — he fucked up a long time ago.... this time, he's forced to face it head-on.

❝ no. you're right. it wouldn't have worked, ❞ he finally manages to say, after several deep breaths so as to not spiral. she knows exactly the right words to say to hit him where it hurts most, theo having always struggled with the balance of tending to a loved one while also chasing after a goal post that was constantly moving away from him. ❝ nobody asked you to do that, kat. you can't blame me for the devotion that you willingly gave me, only to reprimand me for not giving the same amount in return. that was your choice. do you really think i'm ignorant of all of this? ❞ hand slams the filing cabinet drawer shut, red-rimmed eyes on the verge of tears. ❝ you fell in love with the wrong person. i'm sorry but you did. i push you away over and over because i know i can never give you the time and attention and effort that you deserve. i realize that i've probably been wasting all this time over something that will never come to fruition but guilt drives me and that guilt will never go away. so i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i've hurt you. i'm sorry that i couldn't do more for you — for us. but it's not because i didn't want to. it's not because i don't care. you were and will always be the love of my life, kat. but sometimes that's not enough... and standing here, i'm sure you probably understand that well. ❞

[imhappy4u-blog1]

Lies.

I blasted home, something in my body took over me and refused to hear what he had to tell me.

I didn’t want to hear it.

I knew it would crush me.

He left to Edmonton a few days after our blowout.

I needed the space. I couldn’t trust what he was saying to me.. let alone continue on the way we were.

He had told me he had to work but I knew that was far from the truth.

He called me many times and when I would answer, the conversations were tense.

Night after night, I just felt worse and worse.

2 weeks had gone by and I really started to think

What’s the point..?

I laid on my bed, thinking to myself that I was so exhausted from thinking, crying.. overall sadness.

When one night, he finally said..

Alan: I’m coming home.

My heart was confused.. I didn’t know how to receive him. I missed him but I knew the same person wouldn’t be returning to me.

The person who had the ability to shut the world off and make me feel like it was just him and I left.

The one who’s eyes were so deep and profound, that made me feel completely understood with one look..

We arranged to meet as he wouldn’t let me pick him up from the airport.

I took it as it came.. he was hiding something from me. So, a reaction to not letting me pick him up would’ve been a waste of time.

I got ready slowly.

My body and heart knew that something bad was going to come of this I just didn’t know what it was.

I looked at myself in the mirror and let my mind drift.

Why me?

I can’t help but think that this is my doing.. that there’s something wrong with me.

I must’ve done something to make him react this way.

I continued to get ready and headed out the door to our usually meet up spot.

My stomach was in knots. I felt sick. I remember thinking..

“It’s either he wants to leave me for that girl or worse..”

Don’t hold your breath.. it was worse.

I see his car pull up. It didn’t have the same effect on me as it once did.

I climbed into his car. I could smell Versace cologne. Instantly, I thought of the first night we had together.

I shook it off because I couldn’t lose focus.

Alan: “Hi”.

I shook my head.. “HI?!” I wanted to respond by screaming. But I took it as it came..

Stacey: “Hey.”

Alan: “You look sad..”

Stacey: “I am sad”

Alan: “You know, I would’ve never dreamed of hurting you.. right?”

Stacey: “Can you tell me what’s going on? I’m tired of you beating around the bush. If you have something to tell me JUST SAY IT!”

I really couldn’t take it anymore.

He just looked straight out the windshield.

It was silent. I could hear the cars passing by on the highway in front of us.

I waited.

I looked at him.. at how perfect the profile of his face was. His eyes, how they were burrowed by the down force of his eyebrows.

I wanted to run my finger down his nose like I used to.. kiss his mouth with passion and feel his breath on mine.

He finally let out a breath..

“I have to get married.”

I physically felt my body freeze because I knew the following words were not going to be a proposal..

“Before you and I met, I had slept with my ex.. she got pregnant and hid it from me. She told my family and I the truth and now they want us to marry.”

I didn’t believe him. I was 22. Naive, stupid, impulsive, irresponsible but I KNEW he was lying to me.

“Before you met me?”

“Yes, before I met you.”

“When..?”

“She’s 8 months pregnant.”

My head fell into my hands. My mind was going a mile a minute. I couldn’t help but think “8 months is not reversible. It’s practically a newborn at this point.”

I sobbed.

He opened his door and in an instant he had opened the passenger door where I was seated, unbuckled my seat belt and turned me towards him.

I just cried and cried. I had no words.

Speechless..

He held my face and kissed my forehead.

I was expecting it to be over and I would never see him again after the news but..

What came out of his mouth after that.. left me floored.

[volleychumps]

Heyy! Can you do one where Osamu, kuroo, akaashi and Tsukishima, say something mean to their s/o and their s/o avoids them for days? When they finally get ahold of their s/o, their s/o just sorta cries because it hit their insecure spot? Fluff in the end🥺

Listen, I can’t not write this. 

Irrevocable Words. 

- the one in which they accidentally make you give them the silent treatment because of their lashing out. -

~ Osamu Miya, Kuroo Tetsurou, Akaashi Keiji, and Tsukishima Kei~ 

TW: Cursing, angst to fluff, timeskip! for Osamu, 

------------------

Osamu Miya

“Those are important files, ya know?” 

“Samu, I’m sorry. You should’ve told me you needed last month’s earnings and I would’ve looked for them before we came this morning.” The hand you tried to settle onto Osamu’s bicep was shaken off as your movements faltered. 

Your voice wobbled at the sight of your stoic fiance, an annoyed glint in his eye as he rummages through his files. Osamu felt a flare in his stomach, a lack of sleep contributing to his impatient state. The day had been a busy one, Osamu deciding that he needed this particular file for his business call tomorrow before the two of you headed home for the night. 

“I told ya not to move anything back to the place.”

“I didn’t.” You bit the inside of your cheek. “Here, just let me help-” 

“Don’t touch a goddamn thing, I’ll do it myself.” There it was. The lashing out that was bound to happen occurred with a pointed tongue as he refused to look at you, rummaging through his file cabinets. “As I do everything else.” 

He closes the cabinet sharply. “The least ya could do is try your best not to be a nuisance-” 

Osamu flinches at the slam of one of the office desk drawers, chest sinking when he sees the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. The paper he needed is thrown on the desk carelessly as you shove your jacket on, wetness slipping down your cheeks.

“And I’m not your goddamn secretary. I’m heading home first.” 

“Y/N-” 

“And don’t worry, I promise I’ll manage to do this by myself somehow.” Your voice cracks bitterly, the bell by the door jingling mockingly in Osamu’s ears as you exit, the chef hanging his head with a sigh and regret tinging his chest.

He was wrong to pray this would blow over, not expecting to wake without your warmth by his side. You avoided him on the way to the restaurant, cleaning quietly while giving vague answers to his questions, shifting out of his attempts to embrace you with apologies. 

Deciding to give you space, he softly tells you to take the next few days off, unprepared for the tired look you had given him, simply nodding in response as you slipped into your side of the bed with your back turned to him.

“Where’s your pretty girlfriend?” 

“Fiance.” Osamu forces a smile at his two elderly regulars two days later, the wife’s smile widening at his correction. 

“Oho! Cherish each other while you youths still can, she really does brighten this place up, doesn’t she?” 

You do.

Osamu’s eyes feel hot as he does a messy job of cleaning up the restaurant, closing up shop early and stopping by your favorite bakery to pick up the ridiculously expensive cake he only ever buys for your birthday. 

Throwing the door open to your shared apartment hastily, you gasp at the gray-haired man’s sudden entry, dropping the spoon you were about to use to taste the dish you were making on the stove.

“Samu, y-you’re home early-” 

“What’s all this?” He tries to steady his breaths at the sight of a nicely prepared table, something you hardly ever got to share ever since the night shifts overtook your lives and caused a rift between the two of you. 

You’re silent for a second, looking away from his warm stare as you shift under his gaze. 

“...I miss you.” Dark eyes widen when you begin to hiccup over your words, tears threatening to spill down your cheeks. “But I didn’t wanna be a nusciance-”

“Oh god, darlin’ no.” You’re pulled tightly into his chest as you cry, whole body shaking with tremors as Osamu’s inner turmoil merely increases.

If Osamu could go back in time and punch himself he would, unknowing of the torment he caused you over the past few days, thinking you just needed space. 

“I want to marry ya Y/N, I’m so sorry.” 

“I love you so much Samu.” You sniffle into his chest, causing him to smile softly, a hand sifting through your hair to hold you tighter to him. 

“I brought cake.” 

You laugh through the onslaught of tears. 

“And I made dinner.” 

“Then what are we waitin’ for?” 

“Just hold me like this for awhile?”

“Y/N.” He kisses the top of your head, finally feeling at ease with your figure in his arms. Osamu whispers a confession he hardly shared with you, wanting those words in particular to be special as he bridged the gap between the two of you.

“I love ya so much more, don’t you go forgettin’ it.”

Kuroo Tetsurou

“I said I was sorry!” 

“Is sorry supposed to just fix everything, Tetsurou?” 

“Tetsurou? Are you seriously withholding me from my nickname privileges?” 

You cross your arms at his attempt to make you laugh, thoroughly angry with the mess your boyfriend made of things as his smile fades at your peeved stare. 

“Look, what was I supposed to do?” 

“How about not leaving my parents waiting for you at the restaurant that you invited them to for another one of your spontaneous volleyball practices?” 

“I texted you I had to cancel!” 

“That was a half hour before we were supposed to meet, Kuroo! They were so excited to meet you they got there early. God, why can’t you ever take things seriously?” 

“You’re right.” A bitter chuckle slips Kuroo’s lips as you falter at the sudden tone change, the volleyball gym seeming bigger than ever as his next sentence makes your lips tremble.

“Since I can’t ever take things seriously, then I must not need my serious girlfriend then, right?” Your eyes widen. “I can just find somebody else who won’t fucking hound me all the time.”

His cat-like eyes widen as the words slip his tongue, unintentionally coming out crueler than he intended. To make it worse, you simply stayed silent, your body physically backing down and away from him as you turned on your heel. 

“Wait, I didn’t-” 

“Do it then.” His chest just about shatters as your shoulders tremble, refusing to turn back around as your voice takes on an uncharasterically defeated tone. “I hope they make you fucking happy.” 

Kuroo runs a hand through his raven hair frustratedly at the way you rushed out of the gym, throwing a stray ball so hard at the wall before his vision becomes skewed with heat. 

He should have expected the next week to be utter hell. You left class before he could catch you by escaping to the bathroom with all your things, leaving school another way instead of the exit you always took together before he had to start club activities. 

“Kenma, what are you doing?” 

“You can’t come in here.” 

“I’m missing class for this. Let me through.” 

“She doesn’t want to see you.” Kenma shrugged, eyes on his handheld. “I told her I’d watch the door so you can’t surprise her during our breaktime.” 

“I’m her boyfriend. And you’re not her guarddog.” 

“No, I’m her friend.” Kenma’s eyes narrow at his childhood friend. “And last time I checked, you’re on the search for someone who isn’t her.” 

“So she told you.” 

“Dick move, by the way.” 

Kuroo’s calls go straight to voicemail, his emotions affecting his playing with each passing day. He leaves little notes in your shoe locker to meet him, heart sinking more and more with every time you stood him up. 

And it wasn’t until he saw you smiling again at a joke Yaku made that he truly felt like he was losing you. 

“Go home.” 

The sight wasn’t one you were expecting to see, Kuroo sitting on the steps to your house with his hands shoved deep in his jacket pockets, the dark bags under his eyes sparking worry within you. 

“It’s probably better if my parents don’t see you-” 

“I’m sorry.” His eyes seem to have lost a little of their glint, regret swimming in the tall boy’s pupils as your guard softens. “I’m so goddamn sorry I ran my mouth and said shit I didn’t even mean-” 

“Tetsurou-” 

“And I hurt you in the process. I hurt the one thing that matters to me the most, and I’m sitting here playing the creepy ex that stalks the girl he loves-” 

“You love me?”

“Doesn’t matter, does it? You’re done with me, and I deserve it-” 

He’s cut off with the sight of tears hitting the wood in front of him, lifting his head to see tears streaking down your cheeks. On instinct, he reaches out softly, rising to his feet to cup your cheek, astonished when you curl into his touch. 

“I’m so fucking mad at you right now.” 

“Noted.” Kuroo laughs somberly, a wave of emotion hitting him as you do something you hadn’t done in days. 

You look him in the eye, tugging him closer by the sides of his jacket. 

“But I love you too, you absolute idiot.” 

Kuroo grins into the kiss you press onto his lips, heart lifting in weight as he pulls you closer. 

“Does this mean we can go back to Tetsu?” 

“I’m going back to ignoring you-” 

“No.” Kuroo’s tone turns serious as he holds you a little tighter. “I can’t do that again.” 

You smile as he presses a kiss to your temple lovingly. 

“Being away from you was complete and utter hell, sweetheart.” 

Akaashi Keiji

“Tell me how to make this right.”

“Right, Y/N.” Akaashi refused to meet your eyes as he loosens his school tie, not slowing his pace for you to catch up with as he throws the doors open to the volleyball club. The usually put-together setter had an angry glint in his eye that silenced his awaiting teammates. “Let’s just go back in time before you agreed to be his partner.”

“Hey hey, what’s going on you two?” Bokuto jogs up, his worried tone making your lips tremble even more at the sight of Akaashi’s turned back.

“I came to you as soon as he made a move! I didn’t let him-”

“There shouldn’t have been an opportunity for him to make a move in the first place.” Akaashi’s jaw clenched as you shuffle in place.

“I didn’t do anything wrong, you think I wanted him to try to kiss me?!” You fight the waver in your voice, standing your ground. “It was a project for class. I didn’t know his intentions-“

“I told you what his intentions were, but you never listen.” Akaashi turns hastily, startling you and causing you to stumble slightly backwards into Bokuto.

“Akaashi-“

“Stop defending her. She never listens to me, and then comes crying to me when it turns out I’m right.” Akaashi snips at his best friend, ignoring the silent stares from his quiet teammates. “Why can’t you get it through your head, Y/N? I’m not your goddamn babysitter-“

“You’re right.” You interrupt, fingernails biting into your palms as you choke back a sob. “You’re not, you’re my boyfriend. I just wanted to respect you by coming to you with something like this, but it turns out I’m just a hinderance.”

Akaashi falters for a second, blue eyes widening a fraction at the angry heat that fills your eyes as regret begins to bubble in his stomach at his harsh words.

“Y/N-“

“Give me some space, Keiji.” You say softly, patting Bokuto’s arm to let you through as your shoulders sink in a defeated manner. “I promise I won’t come crying to you about anything else.”

Your steps echo as you walk out of the gym, Konoha breaking the silence first when the door shuts behind you.

“Hate to say it, but that was well-deserved, man.”

Akaashi closes his eyes, head falling back towards the ceiling as he tries to steady his breathing, pretending like he wasn’t scared of you slipping through his fingers. He willed himself to not allow himself to chase after you, his anger directed towards you fading as he forces himself to respect your wishes. 

It was obvious you were avoiding him. Akaashi had blinked when Bokuto had self-proclaimed that he needed you as his “study buddy” during breaks when you weren’t even in the same year as the owlish boy. It got worse when you seemed to panic when Akaashi willed you to talk to him, eyes refusing to meet his watery blue ones as you pushed him further away.

So he gave you your space, wilting with each passing day. It wasn’t until he accidentally bumped into you a week later, the setter turning hastily on his heel to walk in the opposite direction before a soft tug on the back of his school shirt wills him to stop. 

“Keiji.” Your wobbly voice makes him turn back around immediately, a soft palm already cupping your cheek gently. “I’m s-” 

“I’m sorry for being cruel.” The words are whispered against your forehead, Akaashi’s heartstrings tugging in the worst way possible. “I was angry at the situation, my love. And that sorry excuse you call a classmate. Please,” 

His grip tightens just a little more as he feels wet warmth drip into the palm that was cupping your face.

“Forgive me.” 

“I told you I wouldn’t come crying to you-” 

“I want it all, Y/N.” Akaashi pulls back slightly, voice cracking slightly as blue stares intensely into your irises. “I want all of you. Tears included.”

You swat his chest playfully as Akaashi manages a soft smile, hand threaded through your hair as he presses you against his chest.

“Do you still need space?” He murmurs, and you smile at the sound of his hearbeat picking up as he awaited your answer fearfully. 

“Nope. The exact opposite, please hold me?” 

His embrace relaxes immediately, and your heart skips a beat at the sound of his relieved sigh, his slight nod making the weight lift off your chest. 

“Good, now I can take care of your classmate-” 

“Keiji-”

“Nope, my love.” He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, Akaashi’s eyes swirling with devotion. 

“No one gets to try anything with you so long as you’re safe with me.” 

Tsukishima Kei 

“So I’m the bad guy again.” 

“Do you want the honest answer, Kei?” You exhaustedly run a hand through your hair as Tsukishima’s scowl deepens, his long legs easily catching up with you in stride as he tugs on your wrist as the rambunctious court gets further and further away. 

“It’s not my fault you’re insecure.” 

You flinch. “Well maybe you shouldn’t let the girls in the stands cling to you after your matches. They were all over you, Tsukki! And you didn’t seem to mind it one bit.” 

“What?” Annoyance brims the blonde’s voice as he takes another step forward, clenching his jaw when he sees the quiver in your lip, distrust filling the atmosphere between the two of you. 

“Afraid that they’re prettier or better than you’ll ever be?” 

You feel as if the wind was knocked out of your lungs, breath catching in your throat at his insinuation. His guard slackens almost immediately, clicking his tongue before turning away, too proud to apologize for the words he regretted as soon as they slipped his tongue like venom. 

“Yeah.” You laugh humorlessly, making brown eyes dart over to your expression immediately. “You’re 100% correct. I am afraid you’ll find someone better than me in all aspects. Because I love you, you absolute asshole. Is that what you wanted to hear?” 

The silence that befalls the two of you in the deserted hall is broken when you flinch away when Tsukishima tries to take a step towards you. 

“I didn’t-” 

“You never mean to do anything, Kei.” You say in a hushed tone, turning your back on him in an attempt to shield the hot tears slipping down your cheeks. “But you somehow always manage to.” 

The win for Karasuno didn’t mean much to the blonde that night, hoping that this would just go away and things would be back to normal. However, it was anything but. You didn’t look his way once in class, disappearing when it was over. Your voice trembled as you had avoided his seemingly stoic eyes through his frames, simply stating that you wished for some time away from him. 

He was fine. Or at least pretending to be on the outside. In truth, he would never find better, because you were it for him, words that you would never catch slipping his mouth. So he put on a front, pretending that your absence had zero effect on him whatsoever. Pretending the brush of your body against him in the hall as you pass each other didn’t make the blonde want to cave. 

It was the smile you shot at Hinata during one of your breaks that caused him to. The first glint in your eye in awhile, and it had been caused by him of all people, prompting the tall middle blocker to tug you by the forearm into the corridor.

“Tsukishima-” 

“I hate this.” 

You falter for a second, guard back up in a flash as your back touches the wall. “What did I do?” 

“You didn’t do anything, and it’s pissing me off.” 

“I don’t follow-” 

“I was wrong.” His forehead touches your shoulder as you stiffen before relaxing against his familiar touch. “I don’t care how many times I have to apologize. You win, okay? I’m sorry.” 

“This is a rather aggressive apology-” 

“Y/N.” Tsukishima lifts his head so it’s level with your height, unprepared for the way tears brimmed your eyes at the proximity, your guard diminishing. 

“What if you do find someone better one day, Tsukki?” Your voice cracks, inner fears trickling to the surface. “Do I need to prepare myself to lose you-?” 

You gasp as Tsukishima’s jaw ticks before kissing you intensely, his hand touching your lower back to pull you closer. 

“No. You don’t need to do something stupid like that.” His eyes were slightly glaring at you, a flush across both his cheeks. “Because there is no one better than you, okay?” 

It was your turn for heat to flood your cheeks as your eyes widen a fraction, his breath tickling your ear as you stutter. “Kei-” 

“I love you too. I said it, are you satisfied now?”  

---------------------------------------------------------

General works: @takemetovalhalla  @faesbae  @savemesteeb @dreebbles @yams046   @let-me-have-my-own-name  @deadontheinsidebut @lifeisntjustblackandwhite   @curiouslilbeast  @aprettyfruit   @wisepandaslimeland   @h0ngh0ngh0ng   @lmkjimin   @orangegiraffe7   @dai-tsukki-desu   @kac-chowsballs   @spikertrash   @yamaguwuchi   @lord-suneater-explosion   @holaaaf  @babyybokutoakaashi   @lexysclubhouse   @disneyloving-muggle   @kuuuuroo   @theonep1ece  @that-chick212  @mjoork

[luveline]

in the morning, afternoon and night [Fred Weasley x Reader]

tags: reader-insert, hurt/comfort, self esteem issues, low self esteem, reader has acne, sad reader, insecure reader

pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

word count: 1.8k

You glared at your reflection.

You'd think with such amazing magical medicine available, some witch or wizard would've invented a cure for acne, or at least a spell that covered it up.

You'd struggled with it since your third year. The muggle doctor you'd seen with your mother had suggested it was hormonal, and would calm down as you got older.

That was years ago.

It shouldn't have been a big deal. It wasn't, really. It wasn't usually very painful, though it was itchy as a stinging nettle and twice as unsightly. A large part of you knew it wasn't your fault, that acne was something that simply affected people at different times in their lives. You'd tried topicals and changing your diet, you'd tried losing weight and exercising and dermaplaning and everything they suggested in your mams fashion magazines.

Nothing worked.

Tears welled in your eyes and you sniffed them back, blinking rapidly.

It might've been silly, but it honestly made you want to hide away. You'd skipped dinner without really thinking, finding your way into the girls bathroom you inhabited now. You straightened your tie and robes, dusting down the sides. You leaned forward again, dabbing under your eyes with your sleeve.

The last thing you wanted was for anyone to know you'd been crying, because then someone might ask why. You didn't want to talk about it, ever.

If Fred saw you like this...

You and Fred Weasley had been almost dating for a few weeks now. Almost, because you hadn't talked about the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing yet.

It had been years of thinking he was the fittest boy in Gryffindor (besides George) and months of meeting his gaze in the corridors and catching his eye over dinner. Gradually it had become something more; he started carrying your books between classes and opening doors, touching your arms and your hair and your face.

You cringed at the memory. He had been so caring, moving to wipe an eyelash from the skin under your eye. You'd violently flinched from his hand, afraid he might feel the bumpy texture of your skin, feel the acne beneath your makeup. He'd been apologetic and a little confused, filling you with guilt. You hadn't been able to find a way to tell him it wasn't him, it was you. Of course you wanted him to touch you, the thought of him cradling your face had been the subject of many dizzy daydreams, but you just couldn't tell him this one thing.

It was your deepest insecurity.

The stress had only made it worse. Redness was easy to cover with muggle make up and even some wizarding tricks you'd learned over the years, but there wasn't a way to smooth your skin, and the acne was textured.

It was depressing. You didn't want to use that word, it felt ungrateful to compare your skin issues to something so severe, but it made you miserable.

You but down on your quivering lip, pushing away from the mirror unhappily and opening the bathroom door, a frown on your face.

"Y/N!" a familiar voice said.

You jumped, startled but unsurprised. Fred had a talent of always knowing where you were. You'd find it creepy if he wasn't so endearing.

"Fred," you said, plastering a smile over your frown. "I was just coming to find you."

"What a coincidence, ma chérie, I was doing the same."

"Well," you began, easily sidling into his space, "you found me."

"Yes, I did," Fred hummed, wrapping his arms behind your neck, grinning.

He took a long look at your face, his forehead creased. "What's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong, Fred."

He moved his hands to your shoulders, looking down into your face searchingly. "Have you been crying?" he asked.

You shook your head, lying without thinking. "Something in my eye,"

"Both of them?"

You stepped backwards. He let go of your shoulders accordingly.

"Y/N?"

"It's really nothing," you said through a forced laugh.

He frowned at you for a few seconds more and his face cleared. "Alright," he said slowly, rolling the words in his mouth, "if you say so, doll."

You opened like a blooming flower at the pet name, your whole face softening. You smiled, hoping he understood that the smile meant, oh I just so adore you, Fred Weasley.

He threaded his fingers through yours, dragging you down the corridor beside him and waxing poetic about their newest lot of Peruvian darkness powder as you went.

-

It got so bad you couldn't go to class.

Okay, so you definitely could've gone to class, but the thought of leaving your curtained bed was enough to make you sick with anxiety, so worried that everyone would see you - see your face.

NEWTs were coming fast and hard. Everyone who wanted to be anyone was working hard studying their asses of, on top of Professor Umbridge's million new rules you had to abide by, including her newest life-ruining rule: Boys and girl are not to be within 5 inches of each other.

What a joke. You struggled through classes, wrote essays so long your hand burned at night and now you weren't allowed to sit next to your almost boyfriend at lunch? It was miserable. It was making you miserable, and now you may as well have sharpied on your forehead how equipped your body was to deal with it.

Fucking badly.

You groaned to yourself, rolling on your side to face the wall. You were at your wits end. It felt endlessly unfair that the thing that was stressing you out most was getting worse from stress.

Your stomach growled hungrily.

You threw your arm over your eyes in defeat, eyes finally filling with tears. You felt so hopeless. There was nothing to be done except keep up your routine until the flare up was over, or until your mothers next 'miracle cure' popped into existence.

The tears felt too hot against your sore skin. You couldn't help but sob quietly to yourself in self-pity.

A knock sounded at the door. You gasped, wiping the tears away in panic.

"Y/N?" It was Alicia. "Are you alright? Can I come in?"

"Yes," you managed. "Yes, of course. It's your room too, after all."

The door clicked open. Alicia appeared, tanned skin completely clear and glowing, though each perfect feature was marred with empathy. "Fred's been begging every girl in the common room to come fetch you, but I told him to leave you be."

"Thank you," you said.

You cleared your throat. Alicia moved her weight from foot to foot, twisting her hands.

"I- Y/N. I won't pretend to know how it feels, but I promise you, Fred won't care. He's beside himself worrying that you're bedridden and dying or-" she laughed to herself, "or that you're still mad at him for the itching powder. What I mean is... he's a good guy, and you're upset. Maybe you should tell him what's wrong. He won't care."

You sniffed. "I know," you admitted, feeling the weight of her shifting the bed. "I know he's a great guy. I just wouldn't blame him if he, if he didn't like me anymore. If he found it ugly. I would understand it, and I think that makes it worse," you choked on your words, heat building behind your eyes.

"Oh, Y/N," Alicia said, placing a tentative but comforting hand on your shoulder.

You lay in quiet, listening to your own ragged breathing.

"I'll go talk to him," Alicia said.

"No! I mean, no. Thank you, but no. I... I'll speak to him myself."

Alicia nodded, rubbing your arm kindly.

The sound of the door clicking shut behind her finally spurred you into sitting up. You dressed in a hurry, chucking a wool jumper over last nights pyjamas.

He wouldn't care, would he? You cringed. Yes, he definitely would. Whatever was between you would stop. He'd have the grace to let you down slowly, drawing away his affections. He was a polite guy, he'd probably even say the whole spiel of "it's not you, it's me". But he would, eventually.

Well, you figured. Let it be quick. Like ripping off a bandaid.

You tread lightly down the steps, hoping to see him before he saw you.

Of course, when the slightest groan on the bottom step sounded, his lovely face whipped to meet yours. He smiled in relief, but it was mixed with something else. Disgust, your brain supplied nastily. He was disgusted. He rose to his feet, smiling smiling smiling. But something in his eyes was different, now.

"Y/N," he said.

"Hi," you said.

"Hi yourself, beautiful. Where've you been all day?"

"I'm... sick. Bad cold," you settled on.

He raised an eyebrow. "You sound okay," he said, not unkindly.

"I..." you looked down at your hands.

A siren was sounding in your head. You didn't think Fred had seen you without make up for the last 3 years. Fight or flight was leaning heavily towards flight.

"Well, are you hungry?"

You shook your head.

"Are you sure? You haven't eaten all day. You need something in your system if you're gonna fight this cold."

"I'm not actually sick, Fred," you admitted under your breath.

"I know."

You looked up. He was still smiling kindly. It was infuriating.

"Look," you said finally, rushed and all at once, "if you don't want to- if you're grossed out. Then it's fine, I'll understand if you don't want to see me anymore."

Fred was stricken.

"I know it's - ugly."

"Ugly? Nothing about you is ugly."

"Fred, my face-"

"No, listen to me, Y/N. It's not ugly. It's not gross. You're not any of those things, are you kidding?" he said, grabbing your hands. "You're beautiful. All the time, in the morning, afternoon and night. You're beautiful in charms and transfiguration and care of magical creatures. You were beautiful yesterday and you're beautiful today and you'll be even more so tomorrow." He stopped suddenly, looking down at your joined hands. His cheeks had turned bright red.

"Smooth, Freddie," came George's voice, from the sofa behind them.

"Shove OFF," exclaimed Fred, growing more red by the second. Heat filled your own cheeks.

"It's skin, Y/N. That's all it is."

"Okay," you said tightly, trying not to cry.

Fred breathed out, his hair shifting in response. His corded arms pulled you tight to his chest. You breathed him in. He smelled sweet and rough, like burning caramel.

He thought you were beautiful.

You smiled into his shirt.

<3<3<3

tag list: @msmimimerton

if you’d like to be added to a tag list, please ask ! for in general or for specific characters, i don’t mind

[songmingisthighs]

[4.11] mafia!wooyoung × reader

⇀ you thought he didn't care, he was sure he doesn't, he had said it so himself to you. that was, until he almost lost the chance of being able to care for you.

⇁ tw : running away, mafia life (criminal/illegal acts)

⇁ part 1 / 2 / 3

⇁ disclaimer : the author does not support any and all criminal/illegal acts. the narrative written in this story is purely fiction out of the author's imagination. the things written here does not portray real mafia life nor is the author aware of how the mafia life is like. the author is a hermit loser.

At first, Wooyoung thought you had really ran away from him. After the fight you had the previous night, how could he not ?

"All I ask is a little bit of attention! I know you could spare some for me," you exclaimed, following after Wooyoung into the home office in his mansion. Yes, his, he never once said it was yours too so you treat it as such.

Wooyoung rolled his eyes at you, "and I ask you shut that big trap you called your mouth before I shut it for you, but we can't all get what we wanted now, can we ?" He spat.

You're used to his aggressive words, it used to hurt but now the pain just comes and goes. But you're at your wit's end, he was distant when you both were first forced into engagement but he was still polite so you thought that was just the shock, but now that you're married, things got worse.

"Wooyoung," you called, leaning both of your hands on his desk aa he sit on his office chair, "it's been 8 months since we got married," he glared at you when you said that, so you sighed and change your choice of words, "since we were force into marriage... But I've been trying so hard to make this less of a chore for both of us, I don't know what else I could do! You're not even bothering to hide the fact that you hate my guts to your very core even though it wasn't my fault that we got into this! Heck, you don't even bother to acknowledge that I exist!"

Wooyoung slammed his hands down on the table, standing face to face with you, "that's right," he chuckled darkly, "I don't even bother, you know why? Because you're nothing in my life, I never ask for you, I never wanted you, you're still here because your dad's business fell through with my dad and he used you as mean of escaping because that's all you are, princess," he leaned closer to your face and spoke through gritted teeth, "a worthless burden that people toss around,"

It would've been a lie if you said that his words doesn't affect you whatsoever. Because it does.

Maybe deep down that was one of your biggest fear and having someone confirmed that made you feel sick to your stomach. You recoiled from the table, as if having been struck across your face.

Though Wooyoung had a satisfied smirk on his face, "you should know I've been planning your assasination ever since you said 'I do', I would've made it look like an accident so that my dad wouldn't be up in my ass talking about losing his insurance of control over your dad, maybe I should move the schedule up so I can get rid of you quicker,"

You stared at him for a while, not knowing that he actually hated you that much. All this time you thought it was just petty reluctance of being tied to you, but this just brought things to a whole new level.

"No..." you choked out, trying to hold back tears, "I'll take care of it myself," and with that, you ran out of his office to pack all your belongings with tears streaming down your face.

And that was the last time Wooyoung had seen you. He had heard from one of his butlers that he had seen you running around the house retrieving your things where it supposedly was earlier, you looked frantic and you hadn't even taken a second to take a break.

"And did she got out of the house today?" Wooyoung asked from his position on the couch, loosening all of the buttons on his shirt. "No, master, not that any of us know of," said butler then leaned close to Wooyoung's ears, "the cctv has been cut off, her bodyguards are dismissed, no one has tended to her nor got close to her, and I personally see to it that all windows and doors are unlocked just as you had requested,"

Wooyoung couldn't believe that he's probably a free man now, that YOU had left him so that he wouldn't be in hot water with his father.

With a glass of whiskey in his hand, he decided to look around to see whether or not you had really left while telling his maid to prepare dinner for him.

True to what he expected, he made two laps around the mansion but not once did he find you. Not even in his office with a divorce paper, as dramatic as it sound.

He finally step into his shared bedroom with you to make his final confirmation.

At first he knocked on the door, not really knowing why he did that, but when no sound came from the room he simply opened the door and walked in. He hadn't returned the night before, spending half of his night in his home office before going out with San to a bar, not realizing that it was his guilt that drove him out to drink his memory away.

Looking around the room, he couldn't really tell whether or not you had ran away. The room looked like it had been slept in the night before, he could see the spot where you laid in comparison to his side that's perfectly neat.

When he stepped into the walk-in closet, he was quite surprised at the sheer contrast to the bedroom. Your clothes thrown haphazardly, it seems like you were urgently looking for things to pack, and the more he analyze the items on the floor, the more he realized that you hadn't taken anything that was bought with his money.

But that wasn't the thing that got his attention.

It was your wedding dress that had been taken out of its garment bag, across from it, an empty bottle of wine and a box of tissues with crumpled tissues surrounding it. It looked straight out of a movie.

He walked closer to the dress and trailed a hand down it.

He remembered seeing you wear it on your wedding day. He remembered being too pissed at his father to be able to fully appreciate how ethereal you looked. He remembered how when you looked at him, he could see the redness in your eyes, indicating that you had been crying.

But over all, he remembered how his heart skipped a beat when he saw you walking closer to him. Of course, he would never admit it outwardly.

His train of thought was broken when his butler knocked on his bedroom door, "master, dinner is served," he said.

Wooyoung cleared his throat and straighten out his posture, "yes, of course, I'll be there soon," he called out.

As the footsteps of his butler fade, he carefully zip your wedding dress back into its garment bag, making sure that the dress is stored perfectly.

After that, he went to the dining room to have his dinner.

Usually, you'd be seated in your seat, across from him at the other end of the table that seats 10 people. He'd have to admit that it feels weird not seeing you smile at him after a long day of working, but he forced himself to believe that it was a good kind of weird.

Strangely, as he eat his food he felt that it doesn't match his palate, that something feels off. So he called for his head butler and asked him about it.

"Did we change cooks? Why does today's dinner taste so bland?"

His butler seemed hesitant to answer him, looking at the head maid for a bit. The middle-aged woman stepped forward from her spot, bowing slightly to avoid Wooyoung's eyes, "we did not have any change in staffs, sir, it's just that the mistress used to prepare all of your meals and considering... the circumstances, she had not prepared anything for you," she said, not even bothering to hide her bitterness that he had drove you away.

Considerably, he was shocked that you had never brought the fact up to him. But as usual, he masked his true feelings and just nod at her, continuing with his meal even though he can't seem to enjoy it.

The shock didn't stop there, though.

Over the course of the first 5 days of you leaving him, he began noticing the things that indicate your presence in his house. Or used to indicate your presence.

He never knew that you were the one who always put flowers around the mansion. He noticed this when he passed by a vase of wilting aconite. It almost broke him when he see the maids cleared all flowers, leaving an empty vase that he now associate with your absence.

He never knew that you kept tabs on food he likes and dislikes. After 3 days, he gave up on eating the food his cook made for him, firing the poor man on the spot and resorting to take outs.

He never knew that you were the one who personally arrange his wardrobe. Usually, every morning he'd find his favorite shirts or favorite sets of clothes on the front, ready for him to pick out and wear. Now that you're not here, he had to spend extra time deciding what to wear.

And lastly, he was surprised at the fact that you had never made it to your hometown.

"What do you mean she's not with her parents?" He growled at his henchmen, making them visibly scared. "W-we tried looking for her, even asking around, but no one had seen her," he explained.

All Wooyoung wanted was to hear about how you're happier without him, how you've settled back to your life without him, how he'd be assured with the fact that you leaving him was the best thing that could ever happen to you two.

Feeling that he owed this for the sake of his own closure, he ordered everyone under him to find out your whereabouts.

The desperation suffocated him, he hated the feeling.

So he ran out of his office to his garden, going to the furthest side where it is practically abandoned so that he'd be all alone to calm his mind.

What he hadn't expect to see though, was several pieces of clothes on the ground. At first he just thought that the laundry might have flown away due to the wind, but when he inspected them closer, he recognized them as yours.

"Why would these be here?" He muttered to himself as he began picking up the scattered pieces of clothes one by one. When he picked up the last piece, he noticed your suitcase by the corner of the tall wall that surround his house for protection.

The sight that made his stomach drop was a rather huge hole that could fit a person.

Wooyoung's brain put 2 and 2 together and the only reasonable conclusion made him feel like blowing up.

You had been kidnapped.

[xutokawa]

I really love your s/o finding scratch marks, so I was wondering if you can do one for Bokuto & Hinata- if not Hinata you can do Akaashi uwu please crush my soul ~🥝

pairings: akaashi x reader, hinata x reader

genre(s): fluff to angst, cheating

warnings: langauge, cheating

wc: 2.4k

» masterlist

a/n: anon!! tysm for this request hehe. sorry it took so long to write :( but I hope you enjoy!! since i already wrote one for bokuto, it’s just hinata and akaashi in this one! also tysm guys for 400 followers!?!!??! i def don’t deserve it since i barely post oops but i still can’t be grateful enough for your support!

atsumu and oikawa ver.

osamu and iwazumi ver.

kuroo and sakusa ver.

suna and bokuto ver.

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Akaashi

Excitement bubbled in your stomach as you checked your appearance in the mirror. 

“How do I look?” you teasingly asked your boyfriend. Looking up from his phone, his face immediately formed into a smile.

“Ethereal,” Akaashi replied, taking in your appearance. You giggle as you walked over to where he was sitting on your shared bed, wrapping your arms around his waist, snuggling into his chest. His scent filled your nostrils as you felt his hand reach up to smooth your hair. Warmth spread through your body. 

“You ready to go then?” Akaashi asked you.

“Ready when you are,” you replied, tilting your head to meet his gaze. His eyes filled with adoration.

“Let’s go then.”

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

The two of you were seated in a nice cafe, hunger satiated as the two of you talked. Your conversations were filled with smiles and laughter. Yet Akaashi’s smiles never seemed to truly reach his eyes. How could they when nothing but guilt filled his mind, when evidence of a drunken escapade was marked on his body?

Akaashi had noticed your intense gaze on his neck, shifting uncomfortably. Panic and dread rose to his throat at the thought of there being a hickey on his neck from the night before. Despite checking in the mirror countless times, he still couldn’t help but feel panicked at the thought of missing one.

“Is everything okay, y/n?” Akaashi tentatively asked, rubbing his hand over his neck. Snapped out of your trance, you meet his eyes before laughing it off.

“Yeah, just zoning out,” you tried to laugh off. You couldn’t shake it from your head. That couldn’t have been a hickey. Even if it was, Akaashi wouldn’t be so careless to not cover it, right? Unless he wanted you to see it. Tears pricked at your eyes. You quickly excused yourself to the bathroom, not wanting Akaashi to see your tears. 

As soon as you left his sight, Akaashi hurriedly checked his camera on his phone to see what you were staring at. Sure enough, a purple splotch was peeking out from underneath his shirt. Akaashi cursed as he wracked his mind with what to do. All he could come up with was pulling his shirt collar to one side.

His heart hammered in his chest. Would you break up with him when you came out of the bathroom? He felt his heart crumble at the thought of you leaving him. Akaashi was hoping he would eventually forget about his mistake and move on with his life with you. He just wanted to move onto the moment he got down on one knee, the moment the two of you would buy a house for the first time, the moment you held your children in your arms. He just needed to get past this moment.

He knew as soon as he saw you walk out of the bathroom. Your red eyes and blotchy cheeks gave it away. You saw, and now you knew how shitty of a person he was.

Silence enveloped the two of you as you sat back down.

“So you saw,” Akaashi confirmed. All you could do was nod in response.

“Wh-what do you want to do now?” Akaashi choked out. He truly didn’t want to lose you. It was like living in a nightmare, but the most he could do now was respect your wishes.

“I-” you started off, taking a breath before continuing, “I want to go back to the apartment.”

Akaashi silently nodded in understanding before gathering his things and leaving to pay. You buried your face in your hands, not fully grasping the situation at hand. Why was he acting so guilty? This was Akaashi, your boyfriend since your third year at high school. Never once did you doubt the love you held for each other during your relationship. 

“C’mon, y/n, let’s go,” Akaashi said, tentatively reaching his hand out to you. You debated whether or not you should take it, still unsure of everything going on. Finally, you gave him, letting his long fingers intertwined with yours. You almost wanted to laugh at how easily your unease washed away at his touch, how you immediately felt comforted, when the man who made you feel this way had traces of another on his skin. 

The two of you drove in silence, neither one of you sure of what to say in this situation. Confusion swarmed Akaashi’s mind. You obviously saw the hickey on his neck, yet you weren’t lashing out, demanding to break up with him. Yet he could see you were visibly troubled, your history and past with him getting in the way of your rationality. Guilt and shame pooled in Akaashi’s stomach. He shouldn’t be using his familiarity with you as a way to keep you with him. He was unfaithful, and deserved all the consequences. He knew that, no matter how heart wrenching it was to have you leave him.

Silence continued to envelop the two of you as you walked up to your shared apartment. As soon as you entered the threshold of your home, Akaashi attempted to start some sort of conversation.

“Y/n, I think we need-” Akaashi attempted to start.

“Baby, I’m really tired, can this wait till after I take a nap,” you cut him off. Maybe if you continued to pretend you saw nothing, that this was just another day, everything would be okay. You and Akaashi would be okay.

“You can’t just ignore what just happened, y/n!” Akaashi reasoned. Your detachment from the situation honestly scared him a bit. He would’ve expected you to demand him to move out, maybe even a smack across the face, but your reaction was unexpected and unsettling.

“Nothing’s wrong, Akaashi,” you said, tears beginning to pool, “I still love you, and you love me, right?” 

“Y/n-” Akaashi started, “of course I love you, which is why I can’t stand to see you like this! I fucking cheated on you! I don’t deserve your love! You shouldn’t be forgiving me! I don’t deserve you anymore!”

Tears began streaming down your face at his words.

“No, no no no, Akaashi, no! We’re supposed to be together! You wouldn’t hurt me like that, Akaashi, you love me too much to do that to me!” You tried to reason. Deep down, you knew. Even if the two of you somehow got past this moment, new insecurities from this moment would arise. Your relationship would never be the same.

“Y/n! Get it through your fucking head! I cheated on you! I’m a fucking scumbag who forgot how fucking amazing you are! I’m the asshole here! You can’t just forgive me like this! How are you going to forgive me when I’m never going to forgive myself?!” Akaashi’s voice broke at the end.

“Akaashi, stop it! There’s no proof!” You yelled back, not wanting reality to hit. Your eyes widened when Akaashi moved to pull his shirt over his head.

“Is this proof enough?” Akaashi started, “What will it take for you to realize? Did you want me to call them up? Have them tell you? Y/n, please, don’t put yourself through this! Fucking wake up and realize!”

You collapsed to the ground, sobbing as you took in his appearance. Hickeys littered his neck and chest, red scratches on his shoulders. It finally hit you. Akaashi cheated on you. He left you for another. 

“Why? Why did you have to ruin this, Akaashi!” you yelled, “was this not enough?”

“I don’t know, y/n,” Akaashi began breaking down, “I regret all of it. I would give anything to turn the clock back, but I can’t! This is reality, and we both have to face it whether we like it or not!”

Pain flared in Akaashi’s chest as your eyes met his. He watched as the love you held for him slowly dissolved from your eyes. His heart fell into pieces as you walked into your shared bedroom, only to emerge moments later with a small duffle bag. He recognized it. It was the duffle bag you used when the two of you took trips. You were leaving.

Tears freely flowed down Akaashi’s face as you wordlessly brushed past him, nothing sounding in the room except your hiccups. 

“Y/n,” Akaashi started, “where are you going?”

“Away,” you replied, giving no other explanation. The coldness and sadness in your voice sent knives into Akaashi’s heart, but it’s what he deserved. He couldn’t beg for your love again, or have the right to yearn for your warm embrace. He’s the one who ruined everything, so Akaashi could do nothing but helplessly watch you walk away from him, leaving him alone in a cold apartment.

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

Hinata

“Y/n~” Your boyfriend whined, plopping his head into your lap. Your hand instinctively went to comb through his orange hair.

“What’s up?” You replied, not looking up from your phone screen. Your eyes finally met his, however, when he pushed away your hands, forcing you to look at him. One look at his pleading eyes was all it took for your heart to melt.

“Can we please go out today? The weather looks so nice,” Hinata pleaded, “Don’t you want to go to the beach?”

“But I just want to watch Netflix,” you whined.

“C’mon, baby. Please?” Hinata looked at you, bottom lip sticking out, “Let’s go outside and enjoy the sun! We can buy ice cream!”

You hesitated for a second.

“Ice cream and smoothies,” you said, “and we go to the mall tomorrow.”

Hinata sent you the brightest smile.

“Deal!”

༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺

“Ugh, y/n, I love you so much,” Hinata mumbled out around a mouthful of ice cream. Giggling, you wiped the corner of his mouth.

“I love you too, baby,” you cooed back, heart swelling at the sight of his smile. Hinata didn’t understand how you still managed to give him butterflies after five years of dating, but he wasn’t complaining. The way your eyes crinkled and your nose scrunched when you laughed made him feel warm inside, and he wouldn’t trade you for the world.

“You know, I’ve been thinking a lot, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life like this with you,” you said, eyes shining with adoration as you looked at your boyfriend. The amount of love you held for the spiker in front of you was unexplainable. All you knew is he made you feel like you were on top of the world, the only thing that mattered to him.

Gasping dramatically, Hinata replied, “That’s insane, because I’ve been thinking that too!”

“Stop teasing me,” you laughed off. Hinata’s chuckles blended with yours. The spiker’s joy was cut off as guilt began rising in his stomach. Of course he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were his everything, the reason he felt like he could breathe easier, the reason everything in his world was so bright. But he knew he wasn’t faithful during your relationship. Hinata didn’t even know how it happened. All he remembered was waking up in a hotel room, his legs tangled with another’s. He remembered the feeling of his stomach plummeting to his feet once he saw the mangled marks on his back.

Hinata was pulled out of his thoughts by your voice.

“Is that Bokuto?” You questioned, gaze pointed at the sandy beach. Sure enough, the wing spiker along with Atsumu were there, standing on opposite sides of a volleyball net.

“Yeah, Kageyama and Hoshiumi are there too!” Hinata excitedly pointed out, already walking towards the volleyball match. You recognized a couple of other players standing around the area.

Hinata bounded towards them, yelling out, asking if he could join. You laughed as you watched him immediately settle into a disagreement with Kageyama before he came running back towards you.

“Y/n!” Hinata panted out, “I know this was supposed to be a date, but do you mind if I play a couple matches?”

You giggled as you saw the excitement shining in his eyes. 

“It’s no problem, I’ll just go shopping around the boardwalk! Call me when you’re done, but don’t play for too long,” you said, giving him a peck on the cheek.

“Yes! You’re the best! I love you,” Hinata said as he enveloped you in a hug before taking his shirt off and running back to the volleyball net. Your eyes immediately fell on his shoulders. 

“Shoyo, what’s on your back?”

Hinata stopped in his tracks as his stomach fell to his feet. He had completely forgotten about the evidence of his infidelity on his back. The prospect of playing beach volleyball with his friends overtook his rationality, and now he was paying the price for it. He whipped around, eyes now wide, panic replacing the excitement that was there moments before. The hurt swimming in your eyes was enough to make his heart shatter.

“Y/n, I-” Hinata breathed out, unable to form a complete sentence. The spiker felt his knees go weak as he watched you turn around and walk away from him, shoulders shaking. It wasn’t until he heard you say, ‘I won’t be going back to the apartment tonight, don’t wait up’ that he scrambled for his shirt, shoving it over his head as he attempted to catch up to you.

“Y/n, please wait! Let me explain-” Hinata ran after you. He stopped in his tracks, eyes wide, when you turned around. Nothing but hurt blazed in your eyes as you looked him in the eyes.

“Explain what, Hinata? Did you want to go into detail about how you fucked someone else? Was simply cheating on me not enough? You don’t get to hurt me more than you already have,” you spewed back at him, venom laced in your words. Hinata’s face crumpled into sobs.

“No, y/n, that’s not it at all. I never wanted to hurt you, not ever! I’m so pathetic! I can’t even remember how it happened. It never should have happened, I can’t lose you like this,” Hinata sobbed, falling to his knees at your feet. The thought of losing you sent Hinata’s mind into a panic. His hands scrambled to find yours, clasping to them for dear life. You scoffed at his actions.

“Get up,” you said, looking away from his figure. Hinata hopefully looked up, hoping you would give him the chance to make it up to you. His hopes were shattered, however, when he met your eyes. Instead of the care and affection he was hoping to see, he was met with nothing but embarrassment and putrid hate.

“You’re making a scene. People are staring,” you said, looking around you, “I told you, I’m not going back to the apartment tonight. I’ll grab my stuff later.”

“I’m sorry,” Hinata choked out, “I’m so sorry for everything. Please, you deserve better. Someone who won’t forget what he has in front of him. Someone who will cradle your heart and give you everything you deserve. I love you, y/n. I’m so sorry.”

“I wish I could believe you when you say ‘I love you’, but we both know it’s not true at this point. No loving boyfriend would cheat,” you said lowly, energy drained from the situation.

“No, y/n. Please, if anything, trust that I love you with all of my being, and I would do anything to try and fix this. I can’t imagine my life without you, let me fix this!” Hinata sobbed.

“You should’ve thought about that before you ruined everything,” you said as you looked into his eyes. Tears pooled in both of your eyes. The hurt and regret was evident on the spiker’s face, but you couldn’t give in.

“Goodbye, Hinata.”