#if this is one of those copypastas being sent around to popular blogs in the misgen tags sorry if you've already seen it a million times but

[ftmcutiepie]

I’m trans and stuck living in transphobic country, I hate my life and I’m planning to kill myself. Does this make you happy and turn you on?

Okay, first things first, in case you're serious:

Call a suicide hotline. Call or go to a local mental health facility that has an emergency service. Go to your local hospital's emergency room.

Talk to family or friends, if you can.

Those things are way better outlets / support opportunities than an online stranger's ask box.

BUT. In case you seriously need someone to talk - and from the tone of this ask I doubt you'd be interested in this offer - you can come off anon and I'll DM you.

I am not taking on responsibility for your mental health, but trans people need to stick together in a world that is so often against us.

Hell, this kink is more often than not a coping mechanism for exactly that.

Where's that tweet that's like, "I'm not fetishizing your experience, I'm fetishizing my experience, idk who you are". That.

This blog, and many blogs that fetishize dark, terrible real life things like SA, abuse, misogyny (dare I say racism? I'm technically mixed race but white passing and culturally white, I don't feel like it's my place to have an opinion on this), are FANTASY, often times COPING MECHANISMS and should be between CONSENTING ADULTS ONLY.

I do engage in this kink from a privileged position. Like I said, white passing and culturally white in central europe. Far from transphobia-free, trans people here are still affected by discrimination and hate crimes, but we have the possibility to get hormones relatively easily (I'm almost 7 months on T), and further medical and "legal" transition is harder to get, but possible. Overall, queer acceptance has been on the rise, but so have been right-wing leaning sentiments.

I made my own experiences with transphobia, mostly from family members, and was closeted in some aspects of my life for years. I'm still not out at work because I'm anxious about negative consequences.

These experiences have given me this kink.

Getting misgendered and even deadnamed hurts less when done to me with my CONSENT, not from a place of genuine transphobia. Masturbating to dysphoria alleviates it.

This kink is playing with real pain and turning it into something positive.

I would never stand for someone misgendering or deadnaming someone without their consent. That is transphobia.

This kink - engaged in between consenting adults - is not.

I am truly sorry about your situation.

Obviously it doesn't make me happy or turn me on. I never said it did. If you actually looked at my blog you'd know that.

Again, fetishizing my own experience has nothing to do with you.

If blogs like mine make you uncomfortable, the block button is free.

A few trans people online engaging in a niche kink to cope isn't the reason for the transphobia around you.