#if u’ve come this far just be my friend

[vollerey]

angel has definitely said “its all shits and giggles until someone shiggles” so many times nobody can hear shits and giggles the same bc its been tainted by angels stupid ass😭😭 this is all respectful i love my pookie bear

angel would probably say the following that ive said

“i can be ur angle…. or devil….”

“wdym i cant eat the plastic window decoration things?!! they look so edible…”

“no bro, the minecraft socks say on during nap time. u dont understand.”

“waisiaiit i feel a snize… sne… snez?… sneeze. snssbdhhdnsnebsbz fuck. umm. sneeze AGAHSGAAGHAHAHAHAHACHUUUuuu gat dayum.”

“one day my microwave is gojna explode from me being so sleep deprived i throw my fork in it by complete accident and then it goes KABOOOMMMM and then i have to put it out or apparently so im told?? can i let it burn?? plsss. oh. i canntt ok.”

“FUCKKCUKCK my cknee.. MY CUHKNEE. UAGAHAHHAHASHHAJAHSKSKSM%{#]#]#]^]*]^%]%] OUWCHHIEIEEEE sorry. i stubbed my knee… stubbed? knee slapp?? ouchie wawa,??!”

“ur acting like a terribly self inserted fanfic author. stop it…”

“no guys i cant stop chewing on the straws im obsessed!! i hav to chewed on stuffs.. u wouldnt understand my pain. scoff sfx”

[soobnny]

dating him | lee know

❝ come over, the cats miss you ❞

chan | LEE KNOW | changbin | hyunjin | han | felix | seungmin | jeongin

if he wasn’t a menace before (impossible btw), he sure as hell is now

this man is relentless

teasing as his love language

just loves riling you up bc he thinks ur reactions are so cute

and he smirks a lot too

if he wasn’t so damn attractive, u would’ve wiped that smirk off his face !!!!!

“wait min, i got a text”

“nice to know you have friends”

u hate him 😭😭😭😭😭

he’s such a little shit that he’s even rilling u up during ur dates

like

laser tag games where he kisses you to distract you before taking you out

HE’S SO MEAN

he’d push you against the wall with a sly smirk and you think you won’t fall for it again, but you do

every single time

u should’ve known better

this is lee “resident cheater in all possible games” minho

anyways

he is also an ass lover ❤️❤️❤️

i’m sorry but u cannot go into a relationship with him without expecting him to always have his hand on ur ass in some way

so in short

the trope is giving u thought he was out of ur league but he’s actually a weirdo

so now u’re dating the Weird Kid

(u wouldn’t want it any other way)

his other love language is acts of service

i said in my chan one that minho also gives Chief Hong from hometown cha3

like tell me i’m wrong

man wife #2

he is ur personal handyman

he’s just good at everything

will most probably only do it for u tho

seungmin: hyung can u fix my sink

minho: no

seungmin catching strays 😂😂

you: babe—

minho: what do you need me to do now

he says it in fake annoyance too

but he’s got his tools in his hand already ready to do whatever u want

obsessed i tell u

he drives u around too

if you have an event, a party, a project, anywhere you need to be

he’ll drive u there

he always makes time

AND he picks you up too like shut up

it could be a party that finishes at 2am and he’s just waiting for your call to pick you up

sometimes, you tell him he can just sleep early bc your friend will give you a ride home

when you get home, look … he’s still awake

he’s been waiting for you to come home this whole time to make sure you’re safe

BUT he doesn’t say anything

the moment he sees you’re alive and breathing (and doesn’t need taking care of), he’s on his way to the bedroom to sleep

when u look around, he’s done the chores already

he just does things to lessen the load that u might have u know

if u’re so stressed with anything, he’d silently clean up ur room or bring u food

so u don’t have to think about that anymore

also the best chef in town btw

he likes cooking together

and by cooking together i mean like he does all the work and u just stay there and keep him company

he can’t risk ur clumsy ass injuring urself

comforts u thru his cooking too

would baby u and feed u when u’re sad

his favorite dates with u are quiet, homemade dinners

just likes being with u and u only

away from everyone else

as niki would say, i don’t like anyone except sometimes you

it’s in moments like those that he just unwinds and shows u his softer sides

he’s honestly just so gentle and soft

he looks at u with stars in his eyes

ugh such an attentive listener too

sometimes u think he isn’t listening, but he’s got it all memorized

“yeah u mentioned it on our date 3 months ago”

like damn

anyways, moving on

his pet names for u give olden times

honey, darling, jagi

but also loser, idiot, stupid girl (endearingly)

so u two are giving me old married couple

u’d both wake up early and have coffee or tea together and just talk abt anything

also this is far into the future but like

sneak peek at minho as ur husband

i think u two would be the type to have a garden

like gardening would be ur little hobby

he grows fruits and vegetables

u beg to grow flowers

OK BACK TO BOYFRIEND MINHO

randomly sending selfies thru the day

THOSE selfies

u know what i’m talking abt

forces u to send selfies back

(ur photos are all saved and hidden in his phone but he will never tell u that)

oh u’ve also become his cats’ mom btw

one of ur favorite errands to do is going grocery shopping for his cats

u’d always end up buying them a gift

“u’re the reason my cats are spoiled”

SUUUUUUURE minho suuuuuuure

cat fashion shows

like dress to IMPRESS

(btw idk why but i feel like u could force him to play roblox with u)

he also uses his cats to lure u to visit him btw

“soonie misses u, u’re being a bad mother”

it’s just him who misses u let’s be real

and if ur favorite thing to do with him is cat shopping, his is walking by the han river with you

he loves walking

esp when it’s with you

just a peaceful walk tbh like yall don’t even have to say anything

tho sometimes when he’s feeling playful, he’d suddenly play tag with you

ends with both of u just sitting by the river and looking at the lights and the stars and holding hands or maybe ur head on his shoulder

damn wish that were me fr

when u go home, u watch some variant of a trashy reality tv show together

u’ve basically seen it all

but if anyone were to ask u what happened in those shows, yall wouldn’t know

u two were too busy just making out instead of paying attention

or falling asleep

old married couple i’m telling u

expect to also be dragged into his camping

when he has particularly long days off, he’d propose going camping together

ah, the beauty of warm bonfires and quiet conversations

he’d take good care of you the whole time

like yessss do your job as a man and fix up this entire camping site

and he does

tho, aside from camping, he’d also suggest hiking to take in the view of the mountains and the pretty sky

u’d wake up early on both occasions just to watch the sun rise

in contrast to these very productive activities, sometimes minho also just loves lazy sundays where you just cuddle for the entirety of the day

what more could he want

u and his cats with him

that’s honestly just the dream

good luck cat mom

have fun acting like an old married couple with lee know

he is the dream man

nonchalant to anyone else except u

note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy

[t-cleod]

I’m really proud of how far I’ve come in the span of a year. Sorry for the long delay, let’s just say life had other plans but I’m so happy I finally had time today to finish this piece after in the making of about a few weeks. I think when u do these kinds of remasters ur able to see how much u’ve really grown as an artist. I hope u guys observe and understand how much thought and care artists like myself put into their work. Hopefully I’ll have more art coming soon but please keep that last sentence in thought, that I take time in developing a piece and do not take shortcuts. With that said, Hopefully u guys can enjoy this new and improved Justice League Snyder Cut Poster remaster. Til then, Stay gold my friends and keep growing at ur own pace, TM

[jazzminte]

eye-opening lunch

i had a few colleagues tell me about their impressions of me today. one of them pointed out how i have a “calming presence”, and not one where u can take advantage of, but one where you just. tend to respect. my other colleague almost immediately agreed and very enthusiastically at that too :,) saying how it was actually her first impression of me. she thought i was cool and immediately wanted to be friends with me, wondering how different her life could’ve been if only she’d met me earlier.

but that wasnt the only takeaway i got from the lunch with just the three of us. see one of the colleagues was one of the department heads of the company, a guy my dad’s age, which is also why he always reminds me of my dad. then i realized it was just his overall vibe la tbh bcs the moment he started opening up conversations with us it was just sooOOoOooOoOo eye-opening, heart-wrenching too, if you will. at the very best, that is.

bullet points, bcs i rly cant afford to forget any takeaways i got from the lunchtime conversations we had:

faking it till you make it won’t work. faking it can only act as ur starting point/catalyst, but what can rly bring u to the point of making it is actually ur belief. ur faith, believing that you can actually make it. u cant simply expect to eventually make it by faking it the whole time, thats exactly why u’d get so frustrated every time u find urself spiraling back to square one; it’s bcs u’ve unconsciously put up such an expectation and even pressure on urself to just. make it bcs uve been faking it for so long already. but then again how will u ever be able to reach that point without ever believing u could do it in the first place????? refusing to believe that u can actually get through it, and just resorting to faking it as if uve already got ur shit together rly wont get u far. not far enough, at least. u could be faking it for the rest of ur whole goddamn life, but with zero belief, u will always be stuck. thats just how it is actually.

everyone has a voice in their head. that voice in ur head sometimes telling u not to do this and that, coming up with worst case scenarios that almost always not end up happening anyway. essentially the voice exists to protect you from getting hurt. it’s how humans work, it’s at the very core of our being. to not get hurt. it’s a natural human thing, a kind of instinct we’re all born with, dating all the way back to humans from the old ages. thats also why it’s called fight or flight. we do it to protect ourselves from getting hurt. so getting back on track, we tend to let the voice in our head win, and hv full control over us. we let our minds control us, and not the other way around most of the time. which is where we need to essentially change. we need to be control of our minds, but not in a way that we completely shut the voice down, bcs at the end of the day all it’s trying to do is protect us. that voice has our best interests at heart, it comes with zero ill intentions, no matter how big of a toll it could take on us. which is why our best option for now is to try to be friends with our mind first. thank it for the protection mechanism it almost always comes up with automatically, but also whenever it starts getting out of hand, try to tell that voice that u got this. there is a way for u to overcome it on ur own, and that u need all the courage u can get for u to be able to, and so to do that, ur head voice now needs to listen to u (haha) u need to not let it hv full control over u and the decisions u make in life. thank it for wanting to protect u, but also try to convince it that u’re gonna make it. essentially this is actually u learning how to convince urself of all that u can achieve and overcome. be friends with ur mind, show gratitude, and take control of it. only u can do that.

sometimes u rly wanna do something, but bcs uve let ur mind take control of u, and bcs ur mind is always actively trying to protect u, thats exactly what is holding u back.

living in moderation is good and all, but sometimes, in certain situation and under certain circumstances, u also need to stretch and push urself to get to where u need to, to achieve what u hv to at that point in time. balance is good, but pushing and pulling urself to the limit can also bring lots of benefits in ur life too.

self-awareness is something so so important to hv while navigating through life, but it’s also something so rare that u dont rly find in just about anyone. realizing that u might be the problem in certain situations is a good start. it’s not exactly blaming urself, but more to being aware and hving the realization to acknowledge where the root of the problem rly is.

this is personal to me bcs im the kind of person who would try to adapt to different situations with different people, a ppl pleaser if u will, one who would always come up with multiple solutions per se, hoping u could say the right thing to the person asking u for advice. just hoping to say the right thing. thats a very tiring way of living, actually. imagine hving to come up with multiple scenarios and multiple povs just so u could say just the right thing to the person ure talking to rn, only for wtv u said to end up not being helpful at all, not bringing any substance to the table. then at the end of the day all u’d feel is just drained bcs ure already exhausted by having to come up with those multiple solutions only to end up picking the wrong one, thus being of no use or help after all. so the easiest thing u could do is just straight up asking that person what do they want, bcs at the end of the day u cant ever possibly tell what theyre thinking and what they actually want out of it, out of the question that they’re asking u. by asking what they want will help u to narrow ur options down and help u to choose the next best scenario or advice that would suit their situation most.

im a people pleaser, still. ive always thought i no longer am, bcs of the notion that i no longer rly care abt what other ppl think of me, which is actually so wrong T_T i still very much do, only in other ways now. deep down i still care way too much abt making any mistakes, making any wrong move that would hv ppl turn their backs on me. one misstep could prevent me from properly fitting in different groups. the fact that i tend to change the way i act depending on who im interacting with, even as i try to still be as myself as i possibly could, but the fact that i would subconsciously always choose which front i should put up when im interacting with this person and that group of people etc etc.... it’s probably a deep-rooted mechanism that i’d shaped as i grew and experience life at my pace. yeah. so i am a people pleaser after all, some things rly nvr change.

there’s probably more, but im kinda running out of time here so im gonna pause here for a bit. i’ll come back to this, and hopefully pour out even more bcs each and every word i got from today’s lunch was so precious i only hv god to thank, for moving my heart into agreeing to join them for lunch today. i’ll be back, but thank u, god. thank u en tapai & nuha, but thank u the most ya allah. okk brb

[yong-bokk]

all in²

pairing: special agent ! lee felix x medical examiner ! reader

genre: f for fluff and felix

warnings: mentions of dead bodies and a ghost.. or a murderer... or a ghost murderer

welcome back to skz criminal investigation division !!

today

i’d like to introduce you to special agent lee felix yongbok ( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ ）

he’s one of the two agents with the prettiest long blond hair in the division in the whole wide world

also has the prettiest !! freckles !! that looks like stardust sprinkled all over his cheeks

to conclude: felix looks like a tiny ball of sunshine,

especially when he smiles ,,

BUT he can kick ass real hard ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

very good with weapons and combat in general

he also has the deepest voice which comes in handy during interrogations

“stand up and show your skills you know the drill”

+12983742 points for intimidation >:

don’t u worry though

bc he’s nothing but a cuddle bug and the sweetest ball of fluff to his loved ones ‧⁺✧(⁙´ワ`⁙)⁺

and that will include u

ESPECIALLY u

but first ! u’ll have to meet him

so u, my precious reader, are the new medical examiner in the office yay!!!

it has only been a week since u started ur new job and u’re still trying to adjust

but thankfully u have seungmin, the senior medical examiner and also ur new partner, who has been so so helpful and friendly

u’ve been so busy during ur first week with work and all the transfer administrations that u haven’t got the chance to formally meet everyone

so far u’ve only met, well, seungmin

and the unit chief, bang chan, who is very friendly too

but one day !!

an unfamiliar face showed up at the medical examiner’s office |ω・)

GUESS WHO

i’m going to give u a clue

long blond hair, prettiest freckles, and a BLINDING smile

YES

FELIX (♡ > ◡ < )

he came to ur office to fetch a report from seungmin

and that’s when he saw u for the first time

u were bagging up a few articles of clothing to send to forensics

felix never thought anyone could make a lab coat look so pretty

but THERE U WERE LOOKING LIKE AN ANGEL

u: exist

felix’s lovestruck braincells: (⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ ｡ ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)(⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ ｡ ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)(⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ ｡ ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)

cue: felix embarrassing himself in front of u

“hi, i’m here to r-report”

?????????

u are ??????(・ ・ ? confused

bc the most beautiful person u’ve ever seen just popped out of nowhere and says he’s here to report?

what does he even have to reportksljflkasdf

“hi! uhm i’m sorry, report what?”

“the medical report….?”

????????????????what????????

“OHH u mean u’re here for the medical report? hold on”

……

out of his entire lifetime

his brain choses to be dysfunctional right there in front of u

felix, deep down inside: i want to. (」｡≧□≦)」 D I S SIPATE. (」｡≧□≦)」

“oh right y-yeah, for the burn victim”

u hand him a copy of the report u had prepared and walked him through some of the findings

“we found something in the victim’s ear but i think we haven’t heard back from the lab-“

“hey yn they ran out of the cookies u wanted- oh! (｡･o･｡)ﾉ hey felix!”

“h-hi seungmin”

seungmin looks at him weirdly bc ??? what was that

who is this and what have they done with felix, his giggly cuddlebug of a friend

ANYWAYS

after u finished going through everything, felix said thank u and bolted out of ur office so quick

chan: “u okay there, buddy? u look.. uh”

“……that’s exactly how i feel too”

since then on

he never stops thinking about u

also keeps reminding himself of how embarrassing he was and gets sad over it again • ʖ̯ • )

not that he knows but !! u keep thinking of him too

u’re a little sad that all u know about him is that his name is felix (he didn’t even tell u himself :c ) and that he’s one of the special agents in chan’s division

but u two don’t see each other again after that for awhile

the next time u saw him was when u got back to ur office after lunch break

felix was fetching another report from seungmin

and he was all smiley and giggly (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ* with seungmin but the moment u walked into the room

he just smiles awkwardly at u and rushes out

u figured that he’s uncomfortable whenever u’re around

:(

and it was like that for a very long time

he’d come in with chan sometimes for the reports

and he’d be like buddy-buddy with seungmin but whenever u’re there he’s just hhshdfhshfgotta go

u wanted to be his friend too because he looks so lovely to be around :(

little did u know that he’s just shy because he likes u like A LOT and his brain just short circuits whenever u’re within his eyesight :(

u got felix going dumb da da dumb (sorry)

but stop being sad bc

here comes !! the twist to the plot !! (｡✧ᴗ✧｡)

one day

u were working late and we’re talking like LATE late because

(1) seungmin was out of office for a hearing, and

(2) suddenly 4 new bodies came into the office in a span of 2 hours?!@?!?!@# and u were currently in the brink of breaking down ；—；

but seungmin didn’t raise no quitter

with the power of coffee and anime by ur side, u started working through the bodies one by one

it’s a little past midnight now and u were quite sure the last light outside ur office turned off a couple hours ago and

u see

u could just leave and have seungmin work at it in the morning

but the caffeine in ur bloodstream said u wouldn’t be able to sleep once u get home anyway so

(๑•̀ㅂ•́)و back to work (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و

u were scraping something from the last victim’s nails when suddenly ??? the lights went off

ok let’s be real

u are ⁿᵒᵗ afraid

u work with dead bodies every. day. but it’s god knows what o’clock in the morning AND NOW it’s pitch black and u just hhhhSHDFHS

ur hand went into ur pocket to fish out ur phone but then u remembered that u left it to charge on ur table AT THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM

reader u dummy

u didn’t know how long u froze in that same spot bc ???u’re kinda afraid and u couldn’t see anything

but suddenly u heard the sound of glass shattering and someone’s groan and u thought

this is it this is ur END

seungmin is going to walk into this office tomorrow and find 5 bodies instead of 4

u crouched as a horrible attempt to hide from the ghost……….. or potential murderer…………. honestly u don’t know which one’s better (maybe bc the answer is NOT BOTH??!)

u were internally cursing about how u could’ve had a scalpel in hand for self protection but instead all u had with u was a goddamn TOOTHPICK when u felt something? or someone?touch ur shoulder

“hey-“

“p leasedon’t kill me i’m new here i really don’t know anything pleaseiwon’t sayanything to anyone”

“YN IT’S ME”

“THEY EVEN KNOW MY NAME ALREADYSDKFJSK I REALLY DON’T WANT TO D-“ Σ(ﾟДﾟ；≡；ﾟдﾟ)

“i’m not here to kill usdfskdfjs it’s me!! felix”

,,,,,,,,

felix? (･Θ･)

well

that was

,,,,,,,,embarrassing

“w-what are u doing here?”

“the electricity got cut off and i heard hyunjin say u’re working late and probably still down here so… (´ . .̫ . `) i came here to check on u”

u could barely make out his face in the dark but he was close enough u could see him smiling at u

the two of u just stayed there crouching on the ground and u were just about to say something when suddenly the lights flickered on again

( 〃．．) ohsldkfjs he’s so close and if he keeps smiling that lovely u swear u’ll combust

“are u gonna go home yet?”

“i-i’m not done yet”

“oh ! i’ll wait for u”

“WHAT no it’s late go home”

!!!!

“exactly! it’s late!! i’m not letting u go home at 3 in the morning by urself”

so u quickly finish and when u’re done u found felix nearly dozing off on ur table </3

how can a person be so CUTE ◕︿◕

he walked u home and offered u his jacket along the way

(wouldn’t take no for an answer)

it was a little awkward bc the two of u are just very very Shy

but u enjoyed his company

when u finally arrived at ur apartment,

the two of u just stood there for a little while, u fiddling with ur bag and him with his earring

“i-“ “hey-“

“sorry, u go first”

“i apologize for scaring u earlier…. whenever we meet i just always embarrass myself”

he mumbled the second half of his sentence and ur sleep-deprived brain couldn’t make out what he said but !! he looked so disappointed (っ◞‸◟c)

so u gave him a tiny hug

“no, thank you for checking up on me earlier and for walking me home”

:o

felix was bright red

shy shy felix shy

“no worries..” ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ ⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ “i guess.. i uh- i’ll get going, yeah? see u tomorrow?”

“see u tomorrow, be safe”

felix waited until u went inside and then let out a giggle

u hugged him

this is the BEST day of his life

it doesn't even matter if his house is on the other side of the city

he’d walk u home every day if it means u would hug him again

bonus:

“thanks for walking me home again” (⌒⌣⌒ )

lix looked like he was about to ask u something

but all he could say is his usual “no worries”

u see

felix has been meaning to ask u for ur number for a WEEK now but he just couldn’t seem to get the words out of his head >:

he was just about to chicken out once again when u fished out ur phone and gave it to him

“u know… i’d say text me when u get home but i don’t have ur number”

smooth reader very smooth (＾⌒＾*)

he thanked the heavens he didn’t drop ur phone when typing in his number because boy was he SHAKING

the two of u stayed up all night texting and neither could stop smiling that day

[pigstepmp3-moved]

holy hell, gamers, i finally reached one whole thousand followers! how bonkers is that! when i first made this blog in december 2018, i was just trying to start over in a new fandom. ive been active on tumblr for a looong time (since i was like 11, which is. not great, but we wont get into that). i cant remember quite why i decided to remake, but i never imagined getting a higher following than i did before, but i did! 1000 followers is bonkers, i’ve never had a thousand of anything! i seriously cant thank each and every one of you enough, whether you followed me for 911 or for mcyt or for whatever!

now, since ive reached this absolutely bonkers milestone, im feeling particularly sappy! so under the cut, i have some friends and mutuals tagged who are super great n who are always an absolute pleasure to see on my dash! <3 again, thank you all so much! (ps, if we’re mutuals and i didnt tag u in this, that doesnt mean i dont love and appreciate you!! i mostly am just picking people to tag based off how often i see them on my dash! i love all of u so much <3)

♡ 911 FRIENDS ♡

(aka the ogs, aka the fire fam)

♡ @lovelessmotel ♡ emily!! god, where do i even begin with how much i love and adore you!! i know youre one of my big sisters, but wow i am so proud of how much youve discovered yourself since we’ve met!! like wow, look at this epic, gorgeous person whos one of MY close friends! im so lucky to be friends with you! thank you so much for being my friend, i appreciate you and all the sisterly advice you’ve given me more than i can ever put into words!

♡ @eddiediaz-buckley ♡ sav!! mom!! i love u so unbelievably much!! i am so unbelievably grateful for you and everything youve done for me! all the advice youve given me and all the times youve let me vent to you have been so important to me and i cannot thank you enough for all that. im soso appreciative of you and im so glad that i have someone as amazing as you as my mom/big sister (we’ll never really figure out our fams family dynamics, will we?) (ps, whenever i go outside and have my keys with me, its always so comforting to feel the keychain you got me! its like my moms with me everywhere i go!)

♡ @liesoverthec ♡ bonbonbonbon!!! i love you so much, you wouldnt BELIEVE how much i love you!!! im so glad we met bc you are so unbelievably kind!! there is a very good reason a nickname for u is bonbon bc you are just as sweet as candy!! maybe even more so!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, you give such wonderful advice and talking to you always makes me feel a million times better!! i love you and i am soso glad i get to call you my friend!

♡ @marauder-girl ♡ sabsabsab!! i love u so much, u funky lil future lawyer!! im so proud of u and i can hardly believe ur gonna be my Lawyer big sister!!! thats so awesome!! i cant believe such a rad person is one of MY friends!! how lucky am i!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, youre so kind and funny and talented and your advice has always been so helpful to me too! thank you so much for being my friend and for always being there for me!!

♡ @nighting-gale17 ♡ cait, my love, my wifey!!! wowowow i love u so much!!! im so glad we’re friends, you are so unbelievably lovely!! youre also so unbelievably talented like??? hey queen wanna hand some of ur writing ability over to the unfortunate (like me). i’m so glad we’re friends, youre so sweet and even tho we dont talk as much as we used to, i still have SO much love for you in my heart

♡ @africaneuropean ♡ rae, my father!! i love u so much!! i know we havent talked at all in. who knows how long. but i still have so much love for u in my heart!! you are so iconic and cool and funny, im so glad i met you n became friends with you!! ur one of the coolest people i know, i hope i can be as cool and mysterious and wonderful as you one day

♡ @evaneddie ♡ DHYL!!! dhyl pickle i love u so much!!! whenever u pop into my inbox with random nice messages, every part of me lights up!!! u are so kind to me and for what!! i miss talking to u as much as we used to, you are so sweet and you are such a good friend!! i love u n im SO proud of how far youve come with gif making, i still remember when u first started n youve gotten SO amazing at gifs lately!! i love u soso much n im so glad we’re friends, youre so awesome!!!

♡ @basil-the-writer ♡ des!!! i love u so much!!! i know we’ve never rly talked all that much but im glad we have interacted in the ways that we have!! u are so sweet n so talented!! like the fact that u have the patience for those lil video edits u do?? that is so cool!! all ur edits are so cool, i cannot imagine being able to make stuff like that without dying every single time. u are so cool n i love being able to call u my friend!!

♡ GRIFF ♡

(aka griff)

♡ @yawnralphio ♡ u get ur own section bc u are my only 911 friend who isnt an og, but thats ok bc u are so swaggy!! i love being friends with u griff, u are so cool and funny and i am so glad that u still want to be friends with me despite all of the horrifying things u’ve learned about mcyt from me jdhfajkdhfa. i love u so much n i am so excited to get to know u more n get closer to u!!

♡ FRUITBLR ♡

(aka mcyt friends)

♡ @fear-epidemic ♡ atlas u are so swaggy and funny!! tumblr funny man!! im so glad we’re mutuals, i love u a whole lot. that one time u me n wilby played bed wars together was so fun even if we’re really bad! n that one time we played on the fruitblr server while on vc was so fun, i loved talking to u n playing with u so much, we gotta do that again sometime. i love u so much chapin n im so glad we’re friends!!

♡ @netheritedream ♡ hari my beloved... i love u so much. like literally so much that its really embarassing. i am so glad u tagged me in that one follow forever post n put the offer on the table to let me join the server. i love being ur dumb lil husband!!! jus like actual fundy, i would risk it all to watch treasure planet with u. i love u sososo much, i wish i could live closer to u so i could actually talk to u more often </333 im going through severe withdrawal, pray for me. im gonna stop talking for now bc if i kept going on, this post would be several miles along n nobody has time for that </3 just know that i love u so much and i love having matching icons n i love being ur husband, i love u so much

♡ @sootswilbur ♡ tommy... i care you so much. little bromther!!! im sososo glad we’re friends bc u are so kind to me all the time n u are so easy to talk to!! ur also so talented, ur writing n ur gifs are so amazing n im so proud of all the awesome stuff u make!! seeing u experiment more with ur gif sets n trying new things is so awesome n inspiring and i love seeing ur experiments work out!! i love u soso much n im so happy to be ur big brother!! (or one of them at least)

♡ @fruitbur ♡ virgil my Other beloved... i love u so much!! u are one of the kindest people ive ever met n im so glad i met u!! i know ive already told u this before but ur tagging system is so sweet n i love seeing u reblog my posts bc im like “yay alastair is gonna tell me that he loves me in the tags :D” i also lovelovelove ur theme, i love the soft pink and the lil aesthetic board that u have pinned, its so nice to look at!!! ily sososo much <333

♡ @theartofmining ♡ hey fruit ily. like genuinely, u are so unbelievably funny that u make my ribs hurt so much. i know we’re like never rly that serious but i love u so much. as much as i joke about hating u, i really am glad we’re friends n i really look forward to becoming better friends with u. i love u a whole lot rain, i love seeing u on my dash bc ur full of good takes n funny posts

♡ @sapnaplive ♡ dream.... bonks our foreheads together... i care u so much. my other half!!! i love u with my whole little heart. u are soso cool and im so lucky to be able to call u my friend!! ur themes are always so cool, i wish i could be half as cool as them!!! ur art is also so epic like??? u are a triple threat: good at art, tumblr themes, AND minecraft building. and ur also so kind!!! u are one of the sweetest people i know, i love u so much and im so glad im friends with u!!

♡ @dreams-little-kitten ♡ corn u are so weird and i mean that in the kindest way possible. u are so cryptic n i love that so much about u. ur like the wilbur to my philza sometimes and i think thats so awesome. that one time u came into my inbox to talk shit about that one cuphead boss was so funny and absurd, i loved that so much. i love You so much. i love how ur just so effortlessly funny, n im so glad i can be friends with u

♡ @dreamsmp ♡  JEL!!!! i love u so much holy cow. u are so sweet!! all the time!!! ur also so talented, ur gifs always look so good!!! i love being friends with u, ur always so nice to me n u always leave rly nice tags when u reblog my gif sets that make me so happy!!! i think about that one time u rbed my fundy gif set n said “FUNDY GIFS” and “GIFS BY FUNDY” it made me so happy!!! i love u a whole lot, im so glad we’re friends :)

♡ @leaguelol ♡ damien!! i love u so much u funky little cryptid!! i love when u pop into the gc just to share cryptic thoughts, u are so strange but i think thats so cool of u!!! i honestly see u kinda like a lil sibling, im always so proud of u when i see ur art on my dash!! u are so talented at art!! i love u so much n i love being ur friend, ur rly sweet n i love seeing u on my dash and in the gc!!

♡ @its5undy ♡ idk why im putting u on this, ur my mortal enemy. jkjk, i actually love u a lot clay! i love joking around with u, ur so funny and for what. im so glad u joined the gc bc i love talking to you so much!! i still love that one time u reblogged that fwt gif set n tagged me in it moments after I reblogged it. i love that u thought about me, that rly warms my heart! i love being friends with u sososo much

♡ @cavalreee ♡ oh hey, another great big fruit!! i dont think we talk all that often, which is a shame, bc ur so sweet!! and also so fucking funny, why is everyone in this friend group so fucking funny, its not fair. i love seeing u on my dash talking with ur other friends, u always have the funniest convos ever. also? ur desktop theme is SO epic, it threw me off the first time i saw it but its so swaggy, just like u!! i love u soso much azzie, n i hope we can talk more in the future bc ur so cool

♡ @technosoot ♡ i love u even tho ur a br*t /j /j /j. jannat u are so unbelievably sweet. im so glad u joined the gc bc u are such a kind presence both in there and on my dash! u radiate very Warm, Friend energy. ur friend shaped. i love u so much n i love being friends with u!! im very eager to become closer friends with u bc u seem like a really amazing friend to have

♡ @sortasortaspicy ♡ les where are u in the gc i miss u </3 i love u so much, u fit in so well from the very beginning n brought so much more fun and laughter into the gc. i dont know u all that well n i dont think we’ve talked one on one like. at all. but id love to get closer to u bc ur so rad and ur so sweet!!

♡ EPIC PEOPLE  ♡

(aka mutuals who are so cool n id love to be friends with u pls talk to me)

@eurytherm ♡ @vampkings ♡ @weelbur ♡ @wilburtheesoot ♡ @quackityskarl ♡ @wimblrscoot ♡ @technofarmer ♡ @wooteena ♡ @bloodforblood ♡ @smpsapnap ♡ @literallynotfound ♡ @hearty-an0n ♡ @enderanboo ♡ @springbonniecpu ♡ @pandascanpvp ♡ @tommylnnits ♡ @strawberrygogy ♡ @timedeo ♡ @nymika-arts ♡ @h-isforhome ♡ @eboykarl ♡ @joe-alkaysani ♡ @betwecouldmakesome ♡ @squirrelstone ♡ @maddieandchimney

[keytomythoughts]

Perfection Imperfections | Chapter 1

Chapter Index 

»»—————————————-　

Finally, summer break. It’s been a while since I was able to go home. Having to attend high school rather far from my home in Seoul, I never thought that I’d adjust to the new environment. Fortunately, I wasn’t entirely alone, since I stayed with my aunt for the four years of my high school life. School wasn’t so bad, but the homesickness is what killed it for me. Even though it was my parents' idea to send me a rather vast distance—me not being too excited about it, but I knew I wouldn’t get my way in the end—there was some good that came from it. The two only good things, actually. 

I glance outside the train window, the buildings of Busan zooming past me. Sure, it may not be my home, but I won’t lie. I’m really going to miss this place. My phone suddenly vibrates in my lap, glancing down to see a text from my group chat, smiling as I respond.

(Binnie)

R u still on the train?

                                                               Yeah have been for the past like 30 mins

(Eunuwu) 

Going back to ur parents? Or r u moving out?

                                                                                                                      Funny

                                                              ��         Yk I can’t move out, at least not on                                                                            my own. My parents won’t allow it

(Binnie)

:/

What about Jaehyun?

                                                                            Idk, they rlly dc what he does tbh

                                                                       They’re just hell-bent on me getting                                                                                    into the top schools and shit

(Eunuwu)

Damn, rough

                                                                                                                        Mhm

(Binnie)

Try talking to them, u never know

They might change their minds?

                                                                 Nah, I already know how it’s gonna end

                                                                         Me crying and stuffing myself with                                                                           pints of ice cream

(Eunuwu)

Doesn't sound so bad

(Binnie)

¬_¬

(Eunuwu)

Except for the crying part ofc

But c’mon it cant really be THAT bad

I’ve been over plenty of times, they seem nice

(Binnie)

U’ve been to her house??

                                                                         Yeah him and oppa are friends too

(Binnie)

Righttt forgot lol

                                                                  And that’s bc you were there dumbass                                                                    and half of the time ur either in oppa’s                                                                    room or out somewhere

                                                                  Interaction with my parents = minimal

(Binnie)

That sounds awful ngl :( sorry Hyuna

But hey we should all hang soon!

(Eunuwu)

I’ll be in Seoul for the summer too so y not?

                                                                                                           I miss y’all :’(

                                                                   Ok I should be there around like 5 ish                                                                     so I’ll text then

(Binnie)

Aww I miss u toooo 

(Eunuwu)

*puke*

                                                                                           Shut up, ur just jealous

(Eunuwu)

Me? Jealous?? Of what, ur face?

Yea no thx, Ive got a great face already

And personality 0:)

                                                                               Gr8, explains why ur still single

(Binnie)

LOLL

She got u there bro

(Eunuwu)

Shut up

Ur talking as if u’ve got a gf

Idiot

(Binnie)

At least I didnt reject them as coldly as u did lol 

                                                                                             See? My point exactly

                                                                               Your fAcE scared off every girl                                                                                   in sight bc of tht pErSoNaLiTy

                                                                           I almost feel bad for them, u little                                                                             heart breaker

(Binnie)

He made a couple of em cry I heard

                                                                                                                     Rlly?!?

                                                                                                                         YAH

                                                                                                               U MORON

(Eunuwu)

Bin wtf

(Binnie)

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

                                                                                    U JERK HOW COULD U??

                                                                                              Those poor girls omg

                                                                               Im so kicking ur ass when I c u

(Binnie)

Me 2

(Eunuwu)

Wtf?? Y???

(Binnie)

No reason lol, just feel like it

                                                                                         And this is why ily Binnie

(Binnie)

:D <3

(Eunuwu)

GROSS

                                                                                                        Can it u demon

                                                                                                         Read 4:02 PM

I snort, turning off my phone and placing it back down on my lap as I go back to staring outside my left-hand window again. Meet Cha Eunwoo and Moon Bin, my two best friends. The only reason I got through high school how I did without major setbacks. Sure, there was the occasional homesickness and all, but had I not met these two, I probably wouldn’t have even attended and graduated. 

Being so far away from the place I grew up never really suited me, and they saw it right away from day one how lonely and upset I looked. I didn't seem to fit in, especially since I skipped a grade and was placed in classes that were very advanced for me. Not that I minded the vigor, but it was hard for me to socialize, let alone make friends. 

That’s when I met them. Freshman year in homeroom before my first literature class. Moon Bin, a boy with parted, coppery-golden hair accompanied by his shy, puppy-eye smile and sweet nature, offered me an empty seat next to him in class, even going as far as to share his textbook and asking how I found the school. No doubt, I was embarrassed and immensely shy, stuttering over my words and failing to meet his soft gaze. However, he didn’t make fun of me nor find me odd. All he did was smile, laughing lightly at my slightly flustered state. He stuck his hand out, introducing himself (most people just call him Moonbin or Bin) with that smile of his, thus the start of our new friendship. Since then, he became someone who always knew how to cheer me up when I was feeling down. No moment was ever dull with him by my side. 

Eunwoo, the tall, brooding black-haired and charismatic student almost everyone knew (and crushed on) of, was usually with Moonbin when we hung out together, but he normally kept to himself. Though quiet and sometimes reserved with his intimidating looks, it didn’t take long for him to break the ice with us, the three of us becoming close friends. Promising to stay like this until we went to college and beyond. Regardless if we all diverge and tread different paths, we would always converge and come back to one another. 

Four years flew by and graduation was upon us. Just like that, the two became like family to me, my ride-or-die duo. The two who were able to turn my world upside down, finding solace in a time where I thought it was nearly impossible for me to.  

My thoughts are interrupted by my “Move” ringtone—yes, I’m a huge Lee Taemin fan—looking down at my phone again to see it’s my brother calling. I sigh, picking up the call.

“What?” 

He gasps dramatically. “Is that any way to address your loving older brother after being away for so long?”

I snort, shaking my head. “Loving my ass, oppa. How are mom and dad?”

“They’re fine, living. Didn’t you tell them you’re coming home?”

“Nope, I don’t even text them that often. You already know this..”

He sighs. “Yeah, I figured.” 

There’s a slight pause on his end, but he continues. “You took the three-thirty train, right? So you’ll be here around five or so?”

“Yeah, give or take.” 

I look out the window again to see the endless stretch of greenery and flowing springs, sometimes even children playing in the fields. I grin mischievously, deciding to poke fun at my brother when he doesn’t respond right away. 

“What, you miss me?”

He makes a sound similar to throwing up. “As if. I got so used to the peace and quiet. I’m not ready for it to go away.” 

“Yah!” I realize that I had yelled a bit too loudly and eyes were now trained on me, and I bow my head in apology. I lower my voice, “You’re such an asshole.”

“Oh, I know, but you still love me anyway.”

“Shut up.”

I can hear his laugh resonate through the phone and a smile unknowingly tugs at my lips. I wouldn’t say it out loud, but it’s true. When I lived with my aunt in Busan for the duration of high school, I missed Jaehyun a lot. Though two years older than me, he didn’t seem to alienate me the way my parents do. While I hate the notion that they spoil Jaehyun endlessly and let him do as he wishes, I won’t lie and say that he was a prick about it. He could’ve been, but he never came off as selfish. I’m really close with my brother, shocking as it may be. Sibling relationships are like that—one minute you want to strangle them with their intestines and the next you’re singing duets together. Crazy, but that’s how it is for us. My parents don’t really pay me any attention, so Jaehyun decides to do that instead. Not complaining though. I’d rather take his pranking and teasing over my parents’ demands and reprimands any day.

“Aight, I’m heading out for a bit. Text me when you arrive.”

I smile again. “Will do, but make sure to get me food!”

“Let me think…” He hums, and I can practically sense the smirk on his end. “Nope. Get your own.”

“Oppa!”

Jaehyun laughs. “See you in a bit, Hyuna. Get here safely. Bye!”   

He hangs up the call before I get a chance to retort, and I scoff. Typical of my brother. He knows how much I enjoy street food, and every time he goes out, it’s almost certain that most of the time he stops somewhere to eat. Did he ever bring food back? Sure, but by the time I’d get to it, most of it was gone anyways. That only lasted a little while before I had gone upstate anyways, so he had more food for himself, I guess.

As the train barrels down the tracks, I feel my heart racing in excitement, but there’s also a slight ounce of dread. I really don’t know why. I want to believe it’s because I’ve been away for too long, but part of me knows it’s the fact that I’ll have to face my parents again. Knowing that I only have two months to decide where I wanted to go and what I wanted to do, I know the bitter truth is that those decisions won’t be left up to me. Last time, I was sent to Busan.

God knows where I’d be sent to now.

***

“Final destination of the KTX Busan-Seoul train at Seoul Station is approaching and will arrive at 05:30 PM. The doors to alight are on the right hand side. All passengers are requested to dismount the train upon arrival. Thank you.” 

That’s my stop.

Gathering my bag and hand luggage, I patiently wait for the train to pull up at the station. Seeing the familiar shops and buildings around me makes my legs bounce up and down in both excitement and anticipation. 

Four long years away from Seoul...

Before getting off, I quickly text the group chat and then my brother, letting them all know that I’ve reached safely. Side-stepping the other passengers exiting the subway doors, I carefully land onto the platform with my luggage in tow. I breathe in the air around as I stretch my arms up into the sky, the grin widening on my face.

It sure as hell feels good to be back home.

I try my best to maneuver through the crowds, but it doesn’t stop the rush of people knocking into me. At times like these, I curse my genetics for favoring my older brother instead of me in terms of height. Eventually, I come to a clearing and when my eyes glance upwards, I spot a rather familiar dark brown-haired six-foot-tall male amongst the small crowd waving me over.

“Hyuna, over here!”

I gasp, my eyes widening. “Oppa!”

He smiles as I begin walking towards him, my feet hurriedly moving across the concrete. The distance between us shortens and I abandon my luggage as he opens his arms wide. 

Only for me to sucker punch him in the stomach.

He yelps in pain, grimacing as he holds his abdomen. “Shit, that hurt. What has Aunt Sua been feeding you up there? Rocks?”

I smack his shoulder, my blood slightly boiling in anger. “Yah, why didn’t you tell me you were coming?! Do you know how much money I blew off for the bus fare?”

He straightens his back before going to rub his shoulder, then behind his neck.

“Fine, fine. My bad. I wanted to surprise you, but I guess that didn’t work, did it?” 

I cross my arms over my chest, huffing in annoyance. He sighs, nodding.

“Okay, okay, I’ll compensate you. Dinner’s on me.”

At this I grin, blinking excitedly. I grab onto his arm and shake it vigorously. “Really? You mean it? You’re the best, oppa!” 

“Look at this brat..” he taunts, shaking his head. In a flash, he headlocks me and rubs the top of my head harshly with his knuckles, upsetting the neatly-tied auburn ponytail. 

“Yah! Quit it!” I smack his arms and flail in protest, but he chuckles, saying this is what I get for cunningly finding a way to exploit him the minute I stepped back into Seoul. 

What can I say? It’s a talent. 

He lets go eventually, and I try to smooth down my already-tangled hair. I grumble incoherently but Jaehyun pulls me into his embrace, wrapping his arms around me. His free hand gently pats the side of my head in comfort.

“Welcome home, sis.”

I stand there stiff for a second before hugging back. He squeezes me tighter and I find myself smiling into his shoulder. 

“Good to be back,” I whisper. 

We stand like that for a moment before he pats my back a couple of times, us pulling away from each other soon after. He reaches behind me to grab my hand luggage as he shoulders my bag. I tell him that I can carry them just fine, but he starts walking away from the platform to the parking lot. I call out after him as I run to catch up, and I can see the corners of his mouth twitch. Jaehyun leads me to his car, a sleek matte-silver convertible Mustang. My mouth drops open in shock at its stunning beauty, my body forcing itself to remain composed for the sake of avoiding public self-embarrassment. 

He throws my luggage in the back seat before he turns to me, smirking at my expression. “You like it?”

“Shit, do I like it? I love it!” I run my fingers over its metallic surface, the silver exterior gleaming in the evening glow. Grinning, I stare up at my brother who catches my gaze as I stand next to the driver’s seat, my fingers already curled on the handle.

“Can I—”

“No.”

“Please—”

“Nope.”

I pout as I pull my hand away and step to the side. Jaehyun chuckles, rubbing my head playfully before getting into the driver’s seat and starting the car. The engine purrs to life as my brother pulls out his shades and wears them. He looks at me and cocks his head to the passenger seat. 

“Don’t just stand there. Get in.”

Smiling, I quickly make my way over to the other side and slip into the passenger seat. I barely have time to buckle in before Jaehyun speeds off. I scream in fright, but he laughs heartily, telling me to let loose.

With the wind harshly whipping around us, I close my eyes and tilt my head upwards, absorbing the remnants of my childhood in a place I’ll always call home. A place where my heart always feels at ease.

My name is Jung Hyuna. I’m eighteen years old, and this is my story.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 |  

[venusiangguk]

hiiiiiii, i’m new to ur page & i’ve read all of gold rush and first chapter of tao. ur such an amazing amazing writer!! i think im gonna start icrlr tonight AND IM PETRIFIED. everyone has me scared to start, cause i get heartbroken easily.

i have a question AND ITS KINDA AWKWARD..

is eating ass actually gross?? like i have a boyfriend and i’ve done a lot of taboo shit with him and he’s eaten mine but like something about a guys ASS SCARES ME.

but i wanna like , please him. he’s never asked me to but i kinda just wanna ask him and tell him how much he’d enjoy it. i’m assuming u have cause u write so well about it, idk if this is just awkward to ask but none of my friends are into kinky shit and i might as well ask someone online. and all ur asks u seem so so sweet so yea 😞😞😞

btw i’ll come back to see the comments if anyone else has some tips <3

eee thank you for reading!! im glad u liked what u've read so far! and good luck with icrlr LOL tis bittersweet, but i hope u enjoy!!

self proclaimed ass muncher, stella at ur service 🙋🏻‍♀️

i do not blame u for being scared most men are nasty lol so like yeah sometimes it can be gross, but if they are hygienic and take care of themselves and like showered before hand then it's honestly not that bad. its like when ur sucking dick, the first few licks are the worst bc u can actually taste them, but after a while all u taste is ur own spit LMAO 💀

[mooosicaldreamz]

We obviously need your song by song analysis of evermore please!

i got asked to do this about four times so here it is.....much anticipated. i know. please note that when i say that i hate her or despise her i don’t actually mean that. but i do

EVERMORE

OK LETS GO

WILLOW - ok, groovy first time you hear it, right? has a strong rumbly wiggle. let’s VIBE. the low of the verse, the high of the chorus…oh my goodness! what is she doing. she’s just out there! wow. “wherever you stray i follow” is a banger. “life was a willow and it bent right to your wind” with the overlay oof let’s go.!!!! a shockingly strong first entry of the record…best one since “welcome to new york” maybe!!! let’s just say it!!! for some reason “i come back stronger than a 90s trend” throws me off though…i don’t know. it’s just so moody pop, no one is doing it like her!!! i hate her

CHAMPAGNE PROBLEMS - every time i listen to this song i listen to it four times. not a joke. it’s perfect. i don’t think i need to convince anyone! it’s perfect!!!!! what are you doing? taylor swift, the most dramatic bitch, has been writing dramatic bitch songs since she was fourteen and yet, somehow, she contrives to write even more dramatic things as she ages. this song is a JOKE. there are not ENOUGH songs about denying proposals! it’s just simple and sad. oh my god. it’s insane. the fact that she wrote this with her boyfriend (i have a running theory that they are married, we are going to refer to joe as her Perfect and Glorious Husband from now on) …… come on. the ENTIRE BREAKDOWN. “YOUR MIDAS TOUCH ON THE CHEVY DOOR / NOVEMBER FLUSH YOUR FLANNEL CURE / THIS DORM WAS ONCE A MADHOUSE / I MADE A JOKE WELL ITS MADE FOR ME / HOW EVERGREEN OUR GROUP OF FRIENDS / DON’T THINK WE’LL SAY THAT WORD AGAIN / AND SOON THEY’LL HAVE THE NERVE TO DECK THE HALLS THAT WE ONCE WALKED THROUGH” ……. concluding with that absolute stabby killer “what a shame she’s fucked in the head” oh my god……….. and the song resolving in a very adult “you’ll find someone else” god

GOLD RUSH - ok so like this song is like ok it’s got the same groovy high /low that’s happening on willow but it’s so different! it’s so good! the pulse of the beat propelling the whole thing through and then the falling apart “oh what must it be like to grow up that beautiful”……………..ok. the visceral image of “my eagles t-shirt hanging from the door” …………. i admire very much taylor’s oncoming gift of moving through high/low imagery…… i love her so much? it’s so HARD. “my mind turns your life into folklore” beautiful! BEAUTIFUL! also i have some belief in me that this is about karlie kloss but i shall not dive into that hole.

TIS THE DAMN SEASON - oh so i’m supposed to LIVE with this song EXISTING. WHY!!!! HOW……..oh my god………..taylor was like, yes, i’m going to write a song about a famous girl going home and banging her high school flame for a week and jack and aaron were like oh ok. “i parked my car between the methodist and the school that used to be ours.” she is such a joke. “you could call me babe for the weekend” like ok emo!! emo!!! OK. I LOVE THIS SONG

TOLERATE IT - taylor really gave us the most depressing track 5, but it’s absolutely a banger and i love her! she is just vibing! oh my god. what a specific emotion to pinpoint with this song….it’s such a gift. no one is hitting this space

NO BODY NO CRIME - this song has no business being on this record but in the BEST WAY, like how daddy lessons mysteriously appears in the middle of lemonade. oh my goodness. this is just pure country revenge song. taylor was like oh actually i haven’t forgotten my roots and i hate men more than i ever have. and she got haim to sing with her. and it’s so good. the low “i think he did it” oh my goodness. this song is a joke. how is it real? it’s just a perfect radio song. it reminds me very much of “before he cheats” but it’s a lot more sonically calm

HAPPINESS - similar to “tolerate it” and i think “champagne problems” this song is beating on an emotional bush that is really really hard to hit the head of. like, so she collabed with the national and bon iver on this record and previous obvi, and i LOVE them, but their music can often be very………impressionistic? perhaps? is how i might put it. it’s sometimes hard to get a note of specificity from it. imo. but taylor loves a fucking story bro. and she has figured out how to tell made up stories. she can’t be stopped now. like…this space of a breakup and knowing that it’s for the best and being sad in this way? name a pop star who has a song this nuanced. for real! god. i despise her. “across a great divide / there is a glorious sunrise”

DOROTHEA - the other half to the far superior TIS THE DAMN SEASON and a banger all the same. it has the bouncy joy of the most buoyant national songs. in the same vein as the also far superior BETTY, she has her sweet dumb boy slurry and less intelligent voice. i love that she paints these narrators this way, it’s just nothing she would have ever reached for ever before this period. she has a Perfect and Glorious Husband now and she has begun to understand teenage boys, FINALLY.

CONEY ISLAND - i have upon many occasions opined that i love the national VERY MUCH. i once went to a festival with my gf and her sister to see them even though i was expressly not invited and you know what despite the fact that it caused a lot of angst, i got to see the national play TERRIBLE LOVE in the middle of the night and I SCREAMED IT. so like, listen. what is matt berninger doing here, to me, specifically????????? i was somewhat hesitant about how their voices might blend, but it works astonishingly well. and i think that it’s so wonderful, i can’t. the imagery of a dreary coney island…..”sorry for not winning you an arcade ring.” as taylor always proves, the bridge is spectacular. “were you standing in the hallway / with a big cake / happy birthday”……”and when i got into the accident / the sight that flashed before me was your face / but when i walked up to the podium / i think that i forgot to say your name” sorry to yOU calvin. she had ISSUES. and now she has a Perfect and Glorious Husband. also “sorry for not making you my centerfold” ok kaylor

IVY - this song is about emily dickinson and i DARE you to tell me that i’m wrong. I DARE YOU. I DARE YOU. you’d be wrong! embarrassing for you. taylor finally writing a probably legitimate queer song and it’s about fucking emily dickinson is so on brand…..it’s dripping with poetry and groove and she’s so fucking dumb i hate her so much. her narrative of ivy and poetry and the lakes district…….ok taylor. i know. i know you watched all the dickinson things that came out and you identified with her. the gentle sway of the “oh, goddamn” and the “oh, i can’t”……i CAN’T EITHER TAYLOR !!! i CAN”T TAYLOR!!!! “oh goddamn / my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand / taking mine but it’s been promised to another / oh i can’t / stop you putting roots in my dreamland” TAYLOR. and then she says, “oh you didn’t realize this wasn’t gay?” “i want to know the fatal flaw that makes you long to be magnificently cursed” like @ emily yourself taylor “he wants what’s only yours”……TAYLOR. give me the entire catalogue of emily dickinson songs!!!!! i can’t do this. “springs breaks loose / but so does fear” “i’d live and die for moments that we stole / on begged and borrowed time / so tell me to run / or dare to sit and watch what we’ll become / and drink my husband’s wine.” taylor if you see this post, a, i love you, b, i need you to tell me about ivy, and c, PLEASE can i have tickets to your next tour in the year 2025 or whenever because my gf never buys me any to your shows……….i love this song if it isn’t clear. i think i’d love it if it wasn’t gay

COWBOY LIKE ME - ok this will sound weird and if you’ve read this far i’m going to assume that you don’t care about me being weird…but this song reminds me of the fanfiction STAY THE NIGHT by lynnearlington (maybe u’ve heard of it). please reply if you think about this and feel the same. “never wanted love / just a fancy car” “you had some tricks up your sleeve / takes one to know one / you’re a cowboy like me” the opening line re: the tent-like thing reminds me very strongly of the fourth of july at our family’s country club and they set up a tent over the parking lot and this song just makes me think of that vibe????? i don’t know. i have vibes. i love this song a lot, which is impressive because it follows after the gay euphoria of IVY. perhaps this is because it gives me its own gay euphoria. “now you hang from my lips like the garden babylon” ???? is one of the most gay, seductive, brutal lyrics i have ever heard. she wrote that down and was like, oh yeah, vibez, hundo p. she did that to me

LONG STORY SHORT - this song is an honorary sequel to I FORGOT THAT YOU EXISTED from the lover era (honestly i’m still in the lover era). but i actually think this song is better! so we are taking that. “actually i’ve always thought that i looked better from the rearview” ok taylor let’s access that feeling! “no more keeping score / i just keep you warm” is like, stupidly sweet.  rip to calvin but now taylor has a Perfect and Glorious Husband.

MARJORIE - made me cry, simple and beautiful. one of the more personal songs on the tracklist! and something that i had never considered that she would write about, but i think the quarantine period has allowed a lot of us to dig into our feelings, so….vibez. we’re vibing!

CLOSURE - this song’s production sounds a lot like bon iver’s recent productions, very tech-y and repetitive and spare. rip to karlie kloss but taylor has a Perfect and Glorious Husband and karlie’s legal last name is kushner so who really won? hmm? i love “i’m fine with my spite / and my tears / and my beers / and my candles” the inclusion of candles is just. vibez. there are four candles lit rn in our apartment!

EVERMORE - i think this song is very intriguing and i’m still puzzling with it! the simplicity of her depressive gray November phase and then the very ebullient and bold bon iver interlude……..really has a manic/depressive, sad/angry vibe???? it feels so on brand for this pandemic quarantine…..and it works shockingly well, except for that i’d rather listen to the bon iver part for 10 minutes more. “all my waves are being tossed / is there a line that i can just go cross” and then taylor’s sort of call and response with his interlude……should just be the whole song.  but it’s still good. that’s how annoying she is

[angeltrapz]

SAW ASK!!!!!! 💞 n ee wayz as far as Eric/Adam goes i wld love to hear yr thoughts on how their relationship looks @ th very beginning when Eric still v v fresh in his recovery (obvs we’ve talked a lil abt this both but expandin on stuff), n also u mentioned Eric knowing how to bake (at least some things) n id LOVE to hear more abt that!! also for a general SAW polycule question, just bc it’s a dynamic i don’t think either of us have rlly touched on, thoughts on William + Mallick?

SAW ASK!!! (tysm!! <3)

okay so Eric/Adam:

I rly like th idea u had where they meet at one of Bobby’s groups (also throwing in tht I think abt Group Therapy All The Time) bc like. neither of them want to be there, neither of them rly have much in common w any other survivors, n neither of them can stand Bobby Dagen. so tht’s still like, th foundation fr how these 2 meet to me lol. the idea of them listening 2 him talk while rolling their eyes at each other n fake gagging is So Good.

I feel like Adam is just... rly open? w Eric? bc god does he understand how fucking hard it is 2 be around ppl after smth like that - maybe not to the same extent (though they DO have tht solidarity), but like. there’s only so many times u can hear “I’m so sorry tht happened/I can only imagine what u went thru” b4 yr ready 2 just tell ppl to shut the fuck up. so like, on Eric’s side of things, not getting tht frm Adam? not hearing the whole “I’m rly sorry u almost lost yr son and were locked up fr six months”? tht’s foreign territory ENTIRELY 2 him. sorry is all anyone has to say, even other survivors. Adam not saying sorry n instead being like “well I’m glad yr still around” is kind of what makes tht decision in Eric’s head like, yes, I think I want 2 get to know this dude. He Gets It.

n Adam is just patient too. letting Eric come 2 him, making sure he knows he’s there, tht sorta thing, bc regardless of how much he likes Adam, being around ppl again is not smth he can just jump into. it’s a wound tht is still raw n open n aching n he needs to treat it w care instead of rubbing salt in. n Eric half expects tht to turn Adam away, esp when he sometimes goes a day w no communication, but it doesn’t n he’s just sorta like ??? bc Eric never rly... saw some1 making tht kind of accommodation fr him, never expected some1 to understand it. tht’s another region I feel they’re very similar in - contact, sometimes, can b very very hard, even over text. if they don’t speak all day, tht’s okay - they send each other “i’m okay” texts n th other person responds w “good” n tht’s fine. Adam provides compromises when Eric never even knew tht was a possibility. it’s good.

things progress kinda slowly but not in a bad way. they’re just kind of getting used 2 each other - both of them have been alone fr so long, having some1 in their lives tht they give a shit abt n who gives a shit abt them is smth they’re both navigating. fr Eric, it’s being around some1 consistently after his trap. fr Adam, it’s actually having a friend who doesn’t make him feel like shit + having some1 he can definitively say is there. sometimes its easier 2 sit in comfortable silence than it is to force a convo neither of thm rly have the energy fr. sometimes just being in a room together is enough. tht’s smth they both notice - tht it’s like. they find it easy 2 be around each other. which is SO foreign to both of thm so they’re just kinda feelin it out?

n again like u’ve written b4, I also feel one of th turning points is when Eric calls Adam abt his hair + Adam shaves it fr him in his bathroom. tht’s th point where they’re both like “oh, I rly care abt this person.” bc it’s three in th fucking morning, Adam didn’t even have 2 pick up his phone or even answer when he saw it was Eric. but he did, bc he cares, bc he wants to help, n Adam’s just kinda freaking out internally too bc it’s been a looong time since he’s felt tht way abt some1 - he just wants Eric 2 be okay. n it’s then tht he’s kinda like, coming 2 terms w th fact that he truly cares abt someone who he can say without a doubt cares abt him too and it’s just like. oof. ESP when Eric sleeps over bc again, it’s early as fuck, and isn’t it so much easier 2 just have him stay? isn’t it easier fr Adam to make space fr Eric in his bed n home n heart? n Eric actually doesn’t tell Adam abt this later, but tht night he sleeps over after Adam shaves his hair? it’s th best he’s slept in fucking weeks.

I feel like after tht they’re a LOT more comfortable w each other - not tht they weren’t b4; I mean in th sense tht when they’re not doing too great, they’ll reach out 2 each other rather than bottling it up n dealing w it alone. Adam comes over w CDs he likes bc he can’t talk abt it but he doesn’t want 2 be by himself n they sit in Eric’s living room together in comfortable silence. sometimes Eric sings 2 him. they both find tht it helps. Eric becomes more accustomed 2 accepting help when he knows he needs it + Adam offers - dimming th lights n staying close by to keep him frm getting another migraine, having th TV on but w the sound down low enough tht it doesn’t feel like some1′s hitting him over th head w too-loud dialogue, getting things fr him on th days tht his nerve pain flares up n he’s mostly confined 2 his bed. they’re there fr each other. this is what friendship looks like fr them, two Jigsaw survivors who understand each other better than any1 else ever could.

another huge step fr them is like, th first time Adam offers 2 help w Eric’s rashes. I feel like, even as they grow closer, tht’s still not smth he’s vocal abt/comfortable showing often, something he’s ashamed of bc he feels like it’s gross n he doesn’t want 2 like. make Adam deal w that. but like during one of their sleepovers where Adam cuts his hair fr him n Eric’s got his shirt off he just. grabs the ointment he knows Eric keeps in th cabinet above the sink n while Eric’s still sitting w his back to him, he wordlessly begins tending 2 the rash spread along Eric’s shoulders n his neck n back, n Eric just. freezes. Adam doesn’t say anything, just does it fr him, n Eric kinda. Breaks Down a lil bit. like he just starts silently sobbing bc Adam doesn’t have 2 do this. he doesn’t have to help him w one of th things Eric hates most abt his own body. he could think it’s Gross. but he doesn’t think it’s gross n he doesn’t mind touching it and he’s so gentle when applying the ointment n then when he’s done he just kind of leans against Eric’s back bc He Knows. he reaches around front n grabs one of Eric’s hands n just sits there w him while he cries it out, holding his hand 2 say I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere, n that is MAJOR fr Eric. and honestly? tht’s kind of th first time he Rly becomes aware of “oh fuck I love him.” (Adam too, ngl)

basically, the way it starts is a shared experience, smth no one else can rly say they have, an understanding based on tht shared experience. giving each other space until they begin inviting each other in. care, patience, “I’m here.” re-learning th feeling of mutual concern. somewhere along th way, it turns into love, and somehow falling into tht is just as easy.

-

Eric + baking:

YES I love this hc!! this is smth he picked up during his time btwn jobs during th earlier stages of recovery (but After meeting Adam/connecting w Art) bc he needed smth to do n was just sorta like, “well I guess this works huh?” n like. it was def a learning curve bc Eric can cook, relatively well/at least okay, but baking is a entirely different matter. at frst he was kinda discouraged when things didn’t turn out th way he hoped they would, but w gentle guidance on Art’s side n enthusiastic encouragement frm Adam, he stuck w it n has gotten pretty good as a result!! his fave things 2 make r peanut butter cookies (he does a little design on th top w a fork n both Adam + Art r like Oh My God That’s Adorable) + th aforementioned carrot cake cupcakes!! frosting is usually homemade n it’s usually cream cheese! he makes his own frosting fr cakes n stuff too (Constantly has 2 tell Adam to “keep yr hands off of th frosting/batter/dough! we’re not gonna have any left!!!” even tho tht Doesn’t stop him).

he makes rly good banana bread too! tht one was a lil harder 2 learn but he’s honestly pretty proud of it now. it’s so funny bc Adam typically doesn’t like stuff like tht but if Eric made it? oh it’s Amazing. (he’s like tht w Art’s cooking too kjdfhjs partially bc he is a Disaster in th kitchen, but also bc That’s His BF/Best Friend!!!)

if some1 is feeling particularly shitty he takes requests (Adam usually wants brownies + Art is partial 2 peanut butter cookies but w chocolate chips too) n it’s just a nice lil thing he can do 2 help, which is smth he Always wants to do. he also stress bakes tho so sometimes his bfs have 2 just kinda like check in n make sure he’s doing okay. but! yeah baking is smth he enjoys + is relatively good at!!

-

William/Mallick dynamic:

yr right I haven’t thought abt this dynamic much but I Am Now!!!

I feel like at his core, William is def a caretaker. Mallick, 2 me, is someone who is just wholly unfamiliar w being cared for. so like, at the Very Least, they’re both dating Adam + Lawrence, right? they spend a lot of time around each other. plenty enough time fr William 2 pick up on this. it just kinda. makes his heart hurt, bc he sees the unease in Mallick’s eyes every time one of thm performs even th smallest acts of kindness fr him - not bc he doesn’t appreciate it/doesn’t want it, but because it’s more that he feels like he doesn’t deserve it. n William Sees That and is just like. I Need U To Know You’re Loved.

they’re comfortable w each other, of course they are! they’re friends, good friends, who happen 2 be dating th same people! who go to bed together at night n wake up w each other in th morning. it’s love, they know tht, but Mallick still always looks so surprised when William makes waffles fr him fr breakfast. William cares.

n Mallick can kinda feel it, and he’s not resistant 2 it, but he’s definitely on edge abt it a little. but William also just has this air abt him that Mallick finds it hard to stay keyed up in, so it doesn’t rly take long fr Mallick to at least be at peace w William’s attention. but the moment he starts to really fathom it is during one of those days he can’t get himself 2 relax n is just shaking out on the couch, knees drawn up to his chest n his arm wrapped around thm, just kinda staring down at th carpet n just Not having the energy to get himself out of his own head. Lawrence + Adam r at work n Eric is taking a quick nap so it’s just Mallick n William.

so Mallick is sitting there spiraling n his breaths r coming out a little fast n William just sits down beside him, a mug of warm tea tht he sets down on th coffee table fr a moment, n he just rests a hand on Mallick’s shoulder. doesn’t say anything, just sort of like. offers tht bridge, opens tht avenue. n Mallick is like This Close to just breaking entirely, but what rly does it is when William just swipes his thumb over his shoulder n squeezes. n Mallick rly DOES break down, almost ugly-sobbing and wheezing, n somehow he ends up w his face in William’s neck, pretty much curled into his side, n tht’s when it truly hits him how much William cares abt him too. tht there are Several People who hold tht kind of room fr him in their hearts n lives. William didn’t even have 2 say anything fr Mallick to understand that, to know it as truth. n tht’s like, one of th events tht actually leads Mallick to building up tht self-esteem, knowing that.

n after tht happens, Mallick is a little less reluctant abt accepting William’s (+ everyone else’s!) help, at least some of the time. like Mallick will catch himself digging his fingers a lil too harshly into th stump of his arm (I’m w u on 10 Pints resulting in at least a partial amputation - like what was tht little scar in 3D???) n then he’ll feel William’s hand cover his n gently curl around his palm 2 be like “I’m not gonna say anything, but I see you, it’s okay,” n his grip relaxes. Eric will notice he’s working himself up too much n he’ll reach out n take one of his hands while he’s pacing + laces their fingers together so tht Mallick has to pause a moment n then he’s able to breathe. Lawrence stumbles across him in th midst of a panic attack n Mallick finds himself breathing easier when Lawrence takes one of his hands, places it over his chest + his heart, n breathes w him. Adam holds him when he jolts awake frm a nightmare. lil things like tht.

one of their fave things to help them both de-stress is they’ll lay in bed n William will read out loud to Mallick, who has his head on his chest n is listening but doesn’t have to put too much energy into keeping up, bc it’s mostly abt being close + having smth to fill the silence tht neither of them feel particularly comfortable in anymore. sometimes Mallick falls asleep n it honestly makes William rly happy bc not only is Mallick relaxed enough to actually close his eyes, he also trusts William enough to fall asleep around him, trusts him during a time he’s at his most vulnerable. it’s not uncommon fr Lawrence to get home frm work to find th two of them curled up against th pillows, sometimes both asleep or just Mallick while William continues reading silently and brushes his fingers thru Mallick’s hair. Adam def has a pic of them like tht somewhere, hung up on th cork board Art had bought specifically fr those kinds of photos. it’s smth easy tht doesn’t really require much energy + has the added bonus of just being close to n held by someone u love n who loves u.

and they help each other. sometimes William has a rly hard time looking at himself, the days where his guilt sits heavy in his chest n doesn’t seem 2 want to anywhere, n Mallick will just sit w him outside on th porch swing and just Be There bc it’s like. “I’m here, I want to b here, Jigsaw was wrong, you are not a terrible person, u did what u could w what u had and I love you,” in a single action. I think William also struggles, like u’ve mentioned tht Eric does, w th guilt of what happened + feeling like it was his fault. so Mallick sitting w him, their shoulders brushing, fr William it’s like, if he was truly as awful a person as John seemed 2 think he was, wld Mallick be this close? wld Mallick willingly lay down beside him some nights n kiss him good morning? wld he kiss him again on th cheek after he makes a fresh pot of coffee + pancakes? n William knows tht Mallick wouldn’t keep himself so close if John was right, so it’s like. proof of tht. n tht means a lot to William. sometimes tht’s all he needs.

they don’t have 2 deal w their struggles alone. they’re both surrounded by ppl who love them n want to see them do well - it’s only natural they feel tht way abt each other, too.

[angelyuji]

BAU - Types of Yandere

ive gotten back into my weird yandere phase and ive seen literally no yandere bau so ive decided to make my own headcanons on them ;) im gonna do the og team + tara lewis, since im only on season 11. i’m not gonna do anything nsfw unless requested. enjoy!

TW // DARK THEMES, ABUSE, GASLIGHTING, JUST BAD THINGS!! i do not condone any of this behavior!!! this is just for fictional purposes!!!!!

Spencer Reid:

calculated, resourceful, patient, emotional/extremely jealous

he’s gonna fall fast. u could literally do one nice thing for him and hes hooked.

he’ll watch u for sure, pictures of u will cover some secret area in his house

he won’t try to kidnap u, unless he feels like he has no choice.

u get a gf/bf? he’ll panic and grab u.

remember: he has an iq of 184. hes smart smart, so he’ll probably get away with ur kidnapping

if he has u,he’ll be patient then too. probably lock you up in a closet or empty room till uve calmed down.

if u calm down and pretend to love him, he’ll honest-to-god be the best boyfriend

he’ll read to u and treat u like a literal queen, with limitations, of course... until u earn his trust

hes literally the smartest babie so he knows how to break u if u dont listen or if ur trying to escape

good luck trying to escape becuz ur in the hands of a genius and he probably has plans to either: a) prevent u from escaping or b) bring u back if u escape.

Aaron Hotchner:

resourceful, sadist, calculated, strategic

he probably met u at a coffee place or at the park, ur gonna talk and he’ll be smitten but the way u interact with jack will make or break his obsession

if ur good with jack, then ur done. ur his now. sorry i dont make the rules.

if ur bad/not good ig? with jack, then he’ll slowly distance himself and u’ll be free :)

holy shit, he does not mess around

unlike spencer, hotch has social skills lol

he’ll probably try to get close to u and then show his true colors slowly.start showing, very very manipulative

if u start dating, he’ll rush for u to move in and try to get u to slowly only depend on him and only him.

if u don’t fall in love, he’ll maintain distance and slowly integrate himself into ur life until he is THE most important person in ur life.

if u end up dating someone else, he’ll try to get u to break up with them and try to make them seem like a bad person.

if this person is ur eNdGaMe, ur gf/bf might end up dying in a weird accident and ur going to wake up in hotch’s spare guest bedroom, tied up on the bed. sooo... sorry.

anyway, once hotch has kidnapped u, there is a 50/50 chance u can escape successfully, but in the end, u’ll be back in hotch’s manipulative arms in no time.

jack will be the no.1 manipulation tactic. ex.”jack sees you like a mom,u can’t leave him”

if u do escape, good luck staying low, hotch will find u no matter where u are on the globe.

Derek Morgan:

sadist, quick tempered, manipulative, quick-witted

morgan has literally one of the best social skills on the team.

u are his gf/bf. u have fallen for him. there is literally no way in hell u didn’t

he is the king of smooth (lol thats the dumbest shit ive ever written)

but like once u guys are dating, he’ll start controlling you.

he doesn’t have to manipulate you becuz ur just gonna listen to what he says

if he tells u to stop talking to ur friends, ur going to stop talking to ur friends

if he tells u to not wear that dress, ur not wearing that dress

morgan doesn’t have to kidnap you becuz you’ll willingly move in with him becuz he’ll make u dependent on him and only him

there is no chance you’ll escape becuz u’ve been gaslighted into being his

sorry babie, you’re out of luck.

David Rossi:

listen, out of all the cm cast, i cannot see rossi as a yandere. maybe like a platonic parental figure yandere but like...romantically? ill write for both tho lol

manipulative, phD in gaslighting, toxic, obsessive

Platonic:

he is a helicopter parent on STEROIDS

you wanna go out with ur friends? who are they, what are their names, where do they live? what are their parents names, address, and contact number?

if rossi doesn’t like any of ur friends? holy shit don’t even bother asking to go out, you’ll only get him mad.

toxic parenting TO THE MAX

literally if u don’t listen to what he says, he’ll shame u and degrade you. ex: “you’re so stupid, y/n! didn’t i tell you to put the dishes in the dishwasher AFTER rinsing them? Do you not have a brain in there?” 

he’ll try to not physically hurt you, but if push comes to shove *shrug*

if ur 18, honestly fucking RUN. get into a college as far away as you can and get a job vastly different from his. so you’ll never cross paths

rossi will check in tho at least once every day

if anyone’s bothering you? you won’t see them again

ur boss is being a dick? he won’t be at work tomorrow or ever again.

if u decide to go back home, don’t bother getting a ticket back cuz once you go back to rossi, there is no going back.

Romantic:

parent rossi but romantic instead of platonic basically lol

manipulative, toxic, obsessive, abusive

he’s controlling, emotionally and mentally abusive

god, hes awful

he will make u feel like shit for wanting to hang out with someone else or if you want to leave his mansion

he’ll make u feel like he’s the only one for you.

ex:”no one else will love you like i do” or “who will anyone love you? ur a mess you shouldn’t even be outside!”

you can try escaping, since he’s gone and he “trusts” you to stay home, but there is 89.99% chance you’ll be caught.

Penelope Garcia:

sensitive, jealous, emotional, possessive

omggg yall are probably friends at first

so easily jealous abt e v e r y t h i n g

you can mention how you had brunch with a couple friends. “are they better than me? u never have brunch with me? why do u always hang out with them?”

god forbid you try to defend urself, “are you mad at me?” immediate tears.

then ur apologizing instead of her.

if ur dating? she tracks everything, ur phone, bank accs, where u are, what u watch. (incognito is ur best friend)

but even then,she knows everything ur doing,no matter the time of day

you can easily escape Penelope tho

shes not out in the field much, so as long as u stay off the grid, you’ll be safe.

the only person she trusts you with is the BAU team, so if you escape

be warned that they’re going to look for you too.

Jennifer Jareau:

possessive, obsessive, kind, deceptive

she’s a mild one honestly

she treats you well, and asks you out + dates you like a normal person

but sis believes that u are the only one for her

if you try to break up, “YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME. ILL DIE WITHOUT YOU”

of course, thats not true, but you can’t risk it.

jj is probably the safest one to be with, she won’t endanger anyone unless she has no other option.

you won’t need to escape either, you have freedom and everything in a normal relationship.

you just can’t leave. thats all.

Emily Prentiss:

obsessive, protective, strategic, patient

holy shit, emily is the worst. like jj, she’ll let you have your freedom

you can go out, but emily comes with, she chooses what you wear, and where you go.

“youre going to wear that? are you sure? cuz that color makes you look fat. you should wear that one dress i got you.”

“baby, stop wearing make-up, you look like a whore.”

“the beach? ill come too. i can’t trust you to take of yourself.”

you probably met at a club and clicked

if you try to break up, “you want to break up? go ahead, leave. who would want you, other than me? you’re pathetic and stupid. no one would ever date you.”

she’ll break you down till you only depend on her, so don’t bother to escape.

you won’t have the will to try anyway

Tara Lewis:

mild, protective, calculative, gaslighting

honestly, tara is the last person i see as a yandere, but she’ll be a lot like jj

she’ll give you freedom and everything in a normal relationship, except if you don’t listen her.

tara is controlling as hell, so if you disrespect her or don’t listen, she’ll break you down and make you question your own sanity.

she’s incredibly protective and she plans like 20 steps ahead (a lot like spencer)

be a good gf/bf, and tara will be good back

be disobedient, and you’ll regret it

if you plan right, you can escape.

tara has to be out of town and you would have to be in her good graces to be allowed out when shes gone, but if the stars have aligned in your favor... you have a small chance of escaping

if she didn’t get help watching over you from the team.

thanks for reading! hope you liked! I take yandere requests as well as normal character requests! nsfw/sfw are both okay!

[s1st3r]

Hey!! Can I have a Bad Batch ship? :) I’m female, 5’7ish, slim, and I have green/hazel eyes. As for personality, I’m an ambivert, I have a veryyy dry sense of humor, independent, and I’m also empathetic. I love giving people advice and being there for them! I’m usually the responsible one when I’m with friends. Cool fun fact about me- I’m pretty sure I have a photographic memory, lol. I love reading educational books, writing, gaming, and I hope to learn how to play the piano one day. I love being physically active and socializing with my family and friends. I can be a bit impatient sometimes and I’m also highly critical of myself. Thanks!!

Thank you for ur request! The more u give me, the more i can work with so this is awesome!

Your ship is...

Hunter!!

Ok, I’ll be real, I read “verryy dry humour” and was immediately like “yep. hunter”.

Hunter loves that u can match his humour lol. U two honestly have the best time during missions just throwing super dry jokes at each other through the comms until one of the others finally tells u guys to shut up 😂

He also loves that ur independent. I feel that this is a quality many clones would admire but especially if ur going to keep up with the bad batch. Ur reliable and competent and hunter loves it. U being physically active and sociable just makes u that much easier to relate and talk to.

Your empathetic and assisting nature is also super helpful for hunter when things get a little out of hand. There’s a lot of responsibility on hunter and it would b fantastic for him to have someone like u who is there to listen and empathise even if there’s nothing u can physically do to help the situation.

Since ur more responsible, hunter finds it easy to trust u and far more easier to work with u.

He also appreciates that ur somehow able to tame wrecker just by whipping out a controller and going a few rounds of the console/pc.

Sometimes you might remind him of tech when u recite to him some interesting fact u found in one of ur books. He says it’s annoying (but he secretly finds it so cute when u start gushing about these random topics u’ve enraptured urself into). The fact that this means u get along pretty well with tech makes him feel relaxed for some reason.

U may be a bit impatient sometimes (maybe a bit of a hot head when things get really frustrating), but hunter learns very quickly ur signs of frustration and is very used to defusing unnecessary conflicts, so he makes sure to jump in before things get out of hand.

As far as ur self critical tendencies, he honestly doesn’t understand where they come from, which to him is really frustrating because it means he doesnt really know how to make these thoughts go away. He thinks ur very easy going and capable, so when u voice concerns that u feel otherwise, he gets so confused and spends the next hour or so explaining why ur wrong lol. He just tells u how it is. He unknowingly reaffirms u.

When u tell him that u want to learn how to play the piano one day, he asks with confusion “what’s a piano?”. He’s entranced by ur excitement as u describe the instrument and finds ur ambitions endearing.

~ Sister

[indic0lite]

Right so I'm not keeping up with Unus Annus at all but what's all this about codes and nerdfiction?

ahh u’ve come to the right person my friend!

basically: UA has an editor named Nerdfiction or Marcus who puts codes into some of his videos that he edits and he’s also responsible for editing basically any other video that has a weird ass thing in it (Tho so far the only ones are The fire video where Unus appeared in the window and the force video which just had a bunch of weird stuff at the end, my new header is one of those!)

Marcus even changes his twitter bio sometimes to reflect on recent UA codes rn shit-

it’s strange and weird and no one here knows what the fuck is going on

I made an entire google doc with every code we know about so far (apparently there’s one in today’s video but I’ll have to update it later once I find the timestamp n shit)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/12xRfoFnQs2_wXLp4snU-sP4pIVYa7Z7dg4LtqCnOO3k/edit?usp=sharing

[penaltbox]

Something like enemies to friends to lovers with beech or mike vorlicky? Maybe it starts w u guys living in the same dorm hall and u hating how much noise he and his teammates make at ridiculous hours of the night when ur more exhausted and stressed out than u’ve ever been before & in dire need of sleep

Oh you know I’m always here for a Mike one 😬

—

You remember the first phrase Mike Vorlicky ever said to you like it happened yesterday. You’d somehow got stuck near a bunch of freshmen in the dorms despite being a sophomore and to say they were loud was an understatement.

You went over to ask them if they could quiet down, just a little, because you had an 8am class the next morning and it was an important one. Mike looked you straight in the face when he answered the door and said ‘I don’t care.’

Your jaw dropped, and before you could argue with him, another boy came up behind him and introduced himself as Owen. He apologized for Mike’s rude behavior and had the boys settle down a little. Owen was much nicer and Mike became your least favorite person on campus after that.

Various run ins happened with him afterwards and you just tried to ignore him. He usually brushed past you, all but ignoring you for the first couple weeks after his rude greeting.

You’re trying to lock some homework down one Tuesday night when you hear a loud thud on the wall next to your bed. You look at the wall, completely confused, and turn back to your laptop. You hear another thud accompanied by a low ‘fuck’ and you know it’s Mike’s voice.

You frown, not sure what the issue is, but you try to ignore it. Suddenly he’s loud, on the phone with someone you assume to be his mom, and he’s complaining. He’s sick, and he has no medicine and no idea how to take care of himself. You curse yourself before getting out of bed and going to his door.

You shake your head but knock anyways. It takes a second before he opens the door but you’re met with a miserable version of the boy you knew. He frowns but doesn’t say a word. You take a deep breath and think of how to phrase it.

“Apparently we share a wall. I heard you say you’re sick, I’m sorry for eavesdropping. I have some medicine if you need it,” you offer gently, hoping he wouldn’t make you regret trying to be nice.

His shoulders drop and he nods quickly, speaking in a scratchy voice, “I feel so miserable. Please help.”

You smile a little and nod, instructing him to go back to bed as you go grab some stuff. He deadbolts his door so you can get back in and follows your instructions. You get everything you think he’ll need and grab an extra Gatorade from your fridge.

You spend the next three days checking on him as he progressively gets better. He tops it off with apologizing for how mean he had been at the beginning of the year. You don’t think you hate Mike anymore after that.

A weird friendship grows after that, rounding out the first semester, and you keep talking to each other despite being back home for the holiday break. You snap, text, and even FaceTime once. It was weird, but you started looking forward to hearing from him.

He’s at your room as soon as you get back to campus and when you open the door, he hugs you for the first time. It catches you off guard, but the feeling in your stomach lets you know you’re in trouble.

It doesn’t get easier after that. He wants to hang out all the time. He does homework in your room and invites you to hang out with the boys. He even invites you to a party, but you politely decline that offer. He still shows up to your room that night, drunk and sweeter than he’s ever been. If he falls asleep in your bed that night, and you happen to be cuddling, well that’s just something you don’t bring up the next morning.

It’s late in February when he comes over one night, seemingly run down from homework, hockey, and his crazy schedule. You had just finished a paper, submitting it and planning what you want to do with the rest of your night when Mike interrupts you.

You sit on the edge of your bed and he walks over, hands on either side of your thighs as your feet dangle. You’re glad now that you lofted it slightly so you’re level with his face.

“What’s wrong, Mikey?” You ask, reaching a hand up and running it through his hair. It was getting long and you hated to admit how much you liked it on him.

He sighs, closing his eyes for a second before speaking quietly, “how would I have survived this year without you?”

You giggle lightly, pulling your hand back to your lap and fidgeting with your fingers, “I don’t know. You seem to be doing just fine.”

“I almost died in November. You swooped in with medicine and saved my life,” he says, acting far too serious.

“You are so dramatic, Vorlicky.”

He smiles a little and shrugs, “I think it’s pretty close to the truth. Hey, I have a question.”

You frown a little because he’s never said it that way. Usually he doesn’t hold back and if he wants to know something he goes for it. You nod, saying, “yeah, go ahead.”

“Will you come to my game tomorrow night?” He asks, almost seeming shy. It wasn’t like him at all but you couldn’t tell what was going on.

You smile a little, “of course, I usually do. Why would this week be any different?”

He reaches a hand up and scratches behind his ear, a nervous tick you’d noticed with him. You grab his hand and wait for him to look you in the eye.

“Mikey, what’s going on?” You ask more firmly.

“I want you to go as my girlfriend this time.”

It’s quiet and rushed, and you have to take a second to make sure you heard it right. Your mind starts reeling, all the little things that had happened since holiday break building in your head. When did this happen? How did you miss that you weren’t the only one with feelings here?

Mike looks horribly nervous so you quickly snap out of your thoughts and nod, telling him, “I’d really like that.”

He lets out a big breath and smiles, laughing a little, “I really thought you were gonna say no. You hesitated a lot.”

“I’m sorry,” you say, scrunching your nose up, “I just had a million thoughts at once. But yeah, I think that sounds pretty nice.”

Mike nods and leans in, one hand sliding up to your hip, squeezing a bit as he kisses you gently. You return it, but instantly it’s not enough. You pull him closer, grabbing his shirt, and kissing him harder. He complies and keeps things going until you have to pull away and catch your breath.

“Wow,” is all you can manage at first, “does this mean I get to steal a sweatshirt to wear to the game finally?”

He smiles, mumbling before kissing you again, “yeah, I don’t care.”

This time the phrase is nicer, holds a much different tone, and yeah, maybe you definitely don’t hate Mike Vorlicky anymore.

[momtaku]

hi mom !! i hope u’ve been having an amazing week so far ❤️ if u haven’t, then i hope it gets better ! i needed someone to speak to about the eruri emotions that slammed into me again after rewatching s3p2 (*chuckles* i’m in danger) /p.1

i was wondering if u knew of any fics that rlly delve into erwin’s admiration of levi? bc i can’t get this picture out of my head of erwin being in pure awe at the power that levi wields everytime he fights. not just the power, the ELEGANCE. erwin thinks it almost resembles a dance, the way levi moves, sure and confident in every calculated mood. i just- rlly like the idea of- erwin telling levi one night, when they’re both sitting on a rooftop of the survey corps hq, unable to sleep- /p.2

“you know levi, the way you fight is incredible. beautiful, even” when what this cheesy as shit commander rlly means is “levi, YOU’RE beautiful when you fight” i’m so sorry for all this rambling mom. i guess what i’m tryin to say is. erwin has the fattest strength kink and you can’t change my mind

RAMBLE AWAY MY FRIEND!! You are preaching to choir 😂

 @lostcauses-noregrets is the (un)official fandom librarian but I feel like basically every fic from Erwin’s POV includes his admiration of Levi. I’m tagging her to see if she knows on any canonverse that focus specifically on Erwin’s admiration of Levi’s physicality (but when you mention dance, her fic “Lead” springs to mind :))

Thank you for sharing your feels with me! s3p2 should come with a massive warning label about how it will mentally incapacitate anyone watching and render them a nonfunctioning human while they process the pain. 

I hope your week is a wonderful one as well ❤️Something tell me you’ve already started writing the fic you want in your head so I hope you keep going with it!!

[ionlycareaboutyou]

prompt: kind of a niche ship but could you write some richie n seth fluff pls? i love your fics!!✨

omg i love this ship. i’ve written them vaguely (richie/seth/stefon threesome fic) but never on their own? so this was a v fun challenge for me. i hope u like it, u’ve inspired me to write more for them!

cw for this being set in IT ch 2 canon, so eddie is like. dead and gone for good, unfortunately, and it is discussed. i picture this fic being set around 2017. i promise this fic isn’t just richie angst, there’s fluff! just gotta get through some sad parts first.

When he moved back to New York City, Richie felt like his 29-year-old self again. He still does sometimes. The NYC comedy scene and the LA one are distinctly different, despite all the NYC expats who move to LA to star in films or do voice acting or settle down and have a few kids. It didn’t feel right to go back, though. LA was all shine and sun, several layers of sky blue paint over decades worth of grime. At least NYC was honest in its grime for the most part. At least New Yorkers were able to joke about their greasy ass pizza and subway rats instead of all trying to be Instagram influencers. 

The real truth was that Richie had friends in NYC. In LA, he had none. And what he needed was friends. 

The funny thing about reconnecting with an old friend is that sometimes, even though it seems like a lot has changed, they’re still the same person, deep down. 

Seth is still a workaholic--the same workaholic who Richie met back when he hosted SNL for the first time. He still stays up til 4 AM sometimes, drinking dark, bitter coffee for the caffeine rather than the taste, darting in and out of cubicles, asking if anything new has cropped up in the past few hours that’s monologue worthy. He still wears those ratty sweatshirts during the day and changes into suits for the evening. He does shave more consistently, Richie will give him that. He still laughs high pitched and loud when a joke really gets him, and he still laughs at his own jokes, even, stumbling through them sometimes with tears welling up in his eyes. He still loves to drink tequila and whiskey and anything really that brings heat to his cheeks and more of that laughter bubbling out of his chest, though he tells Richie he doesn’t drink as much as he used to--he’s far too old for it now, and the hangovers are intense.

(“I do wanna do a day drinking segment with Rihanna, though,” he confides in him once over lunch. They’re eating greasy pizza, and Richie feels like he’s in heaven, because the shit in LA doesn’t even begin to measure up.

“Rihanna? Do you have, like, connections to her or something?”

“No! I wish,” Seth frowns at his slice of pepperoni. “Do you?”

Richie hoots out a laugh. “Dude, you are severely overestimating me if you think I know Rihanna. Good luck on your quest, though.”

“Hey, maybe Rihanna’s got a thing for raunchy comedians who wear the same shirt three days in a row and own like, two pairs of sneakers and refuse to buy new ones. I don’t know her personally, either.”

Richie flicks a piece of mushroom right at Seth’s face. He laughs in that way he does, and Richie’s chest flutters.)

And maybe it’s the fact that Seth is still Seth--still blue-eyed, New Hampshire, toothy grin Seth--that makes Richie fall for him. And he’s not even surprised by it. He thinks he’s always sort of had a piece of his heart reserved for Seth, even when he moved to LA. He was the first one to send him a congratulatory text when the news broke that he got Late Night, and he was always happy to wander around his too-empty LA apartment and shoot the shit with him for hours long phone calls about everything and anything and nothing at all. Seth was the first to welcome Richie with open arms back to NYC. They were the sort of friends that never truly fell apart, even when they went a while without speaking to each other.

It all comes tumbling out eventually, why Richie is back in NYC. Seth never really poses the question, but when Richie calls him one Tuesday night at 3 AM, eyes unfocused and hot with tears and chest heaving with hyperventilating sobs, the answer becomes clear to him. 

He’s still awake, of course, sitting in his office and staring at the writers’ Slack chat when the phone rings. “Are you awake, man? I’m sorry if I woke you,” Richie says into the phone, warbly.

Seth manages to talk him down from it when Richie admits he had a pretty vivid nightmare. He doesn’t judge him for a second or wonder why a 40-year-old man is so shook up by one. He simply talks slow and soft into the phone, telling him it’s okay and grounding him as best as he can. “You can tell me anything, Rich, you know that, right?” His voice is so goddamn sweet Richie wants to sob all over again.

So he tells him everything--well, rather, a condensed version of everything. He tells him he had friends as a kid back in Maine, really close friends, and they met up again after drifting apart, and he tells him that he saw his best friend in the world die right in front of his eyes. He’s careful with his words, but something tells him that even if he did explain all the clown shit, Seth would listen and comfort him all the same, even if he was confused by it. “I feel so bad for dumping this shit on you, dude,” Richie says, fighting back the tears that he’s finally managed to quell. “It’s just--”

“Shh, hey, it’s okay,” Seth assures him, “I can’t fucking imagine. I’m so sorry. I know that sounds really lame, to say I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t really fix anything.”

“It’s okay. I haven’t--no one really knows. I mean, my friends know, they were there, too, but...God, it’s so fucking complicated.” He lays his head back down on his pillow and exhales a shaky sigh, feeling mostly back down to earth. “I guess I just. I picked up my phone and dialed you because I needed to know everything was...you were okay and I wasn’t still in that fucking dream.”

“I get it. You don’t have to worry about that. You know I keep crazy hours anyway.” They manage to get a chuckle out of that. “I hope this doesn’t sound insensitive, but I’m glad you were with him in his final moments, I’m sure he was very glad to have you there.”

Richie swallows the baseball-sized lump in his throat. “God, I sure fucking hope so. He was…” he stops himself. He hadn’t told the other Losers what he wanted to say about Eddie and how he felt about him, but he was certain they knew. Seth is completely detached from this whole situation, but maybe putting out what he’s been harboring in his chest for so long will take some weight off it. “He was the first person I really fell in love with.”

“Oh, Rich.” Seth’s voice is soft and sad. 

“I know that’s a lot to tell you, and like, I haven’t even really told you, or anyone that I’m gay, but I guess here it is, this is so damn...ungraceful,” he rambles with a shaky little laugh, “But I guess I’m not really graceful anyway.”

“It’s okay. You know it doesn’t bother me at all, right? God, I sound like--every straight dude in the world right now. I’m totally cool with gays!”

“Well, maybe a little,” Richie says, unable to not give him a little shit, and he’s happy to hear Seth laugh on the other end. “But thanks. I’m glad you were the first person I told.”

“Well, when I tell you about the dudes I hooked up with in college, I know you’ll be chill about it, too.” Seth says, then adds, “Oh, guess I just did.”

“You what? Seth middle-name Meyers.”

“It’s Adam.” 

“Not the point. You what?”

“Dude, haven’t I told you like a million times about my crush on James Spader? Do you know how many times I’ve watched Pretty in Pink? Too many times. That’s not even the best Hughes film.”

“I thought that was like--a joke! You always said you wanted to grow your hair out like that!” He’s smiling against the phone, really truly grinning at this whole mutual coming out situation, and he’s so happy to be smiling again.

“Well, yeah, I do, but also, like, he was hot, okay? Him being bald now is the greatest tragedy of my life.” Seth says, laughing even more. 

“You know, I haven’t gone bald yet. I’ve got plenty of hair. It’s unwashed right now, but feel free to run your hands through it. We can roleplay. I’ll be...fuck, what was his name? The Pretty in Pink guy?” Richie hasn’t seen that movie since it came out. 

Seth answers very quickly. “Steff.”

“That’s it! I’ll be Steff, and you can be...Andie! That’s her name.” 

“Steff wasn’t the love interest, though, remember? He was the love interest’s asshole friend.”

Richie hums. “I’m kind of an asshole. Not as pretty of an asshole as Spader, though.”

“I think you’re perfectly pretty.”

“Thanks,” he smiles again. His stomach knots itself up, then un-knots. Seth Meyers, the man who’s all blue eyes, New Hampshire, and salt-and-pepper hair is calling him pretty. What a world.

After he hangs up and manages to catch a few hours of sleep, he’s not surprised when he gets a call from Seth a few days later asking if he wants to grab a drink, and there’s a different tone to his voice. He can’t quite place it, but it almost sounds nervous, like he doesn’t want to screw this up. He doesn’t screw anything up, though, and when they make their way back to Seth’s apartment, pleasantly buzzed, and end up on his couch, lips on lips, Richie isn’t really surprised, either. He smiles into each one.

--

They seem to divide their time in between either apartment, not quite ready to have the “hey, let’s move in together” conversation. It’s only been a few months, and they’re taking their time. Richie’s never let himself take his time before.

Most nights, they’re tangled up in whatever bed they’ve fallen into--tonight, it’s Seth’s, and Richie has managed to get him home at a reasonable time, around midnight, even though the show filmed several hours before. (“The news and the president don’t stop,” Seth has explained to him before, “But God, I wish they would.”) He’s running his fingers through Seth’s hair, which is surprisingly soft once all the product is washed out. Richie never gets tired of touching it. “You’re halfway to Spader, I think.”

“Yeah? I’ll see if makeup and wardrobe approve of me growing it out any longer, or if they’ll force me to cut it.” Seth sounds sleepy, but even in the dark Richie can tell he’s smiling.

“I’d like it,” he says, and presses a kiss to the line of Seth’s jaw. “Isn’t that enough?”

“For me? More than enough.” Seth brings him in for a proper kiss, long and deep and warm, hands wandering and stroking skin, unhurried and sweet. 

When they pull apart, it comes tumbling out, as things seem to do. “I love you.” It’s the first time Richie has said it. He’s known it, without a shadow of a doubt, for a while now. And he thinks Seth knew it, too, even if it went unsaid. He understood that Richie was working up to this sort of thing, to opening himself up and allowing himself to cry and feel and say things like that. Like I love you. And now it’s come out, like it was always bound to, and Richie feels Seth smile against his temple.

“I love you, too.”

“More than James Spader?”

Seth laughs. “Much more.” He pulls him in for another kiss, and they say “I love you” many more times that night, and almost every night afterward.