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burstfoot · 4 months

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Hello! Here's an update on all of Arknights' currently accessible auxiliary material as of May 2024! There's plenty to check out, so I hope this is helpful for some!

Animation

Arknights Prelude To Dawn (S1) and Perish in Frost (S2): [Crunchyroll]

An adaptation of the main story, up through Chapter 0 to Chapter 6! It's much more fast-paced than the in-game story, so I wouldn't use it to replace actually reading it, but it's very cool to see some of these scenes in full animation. Season 3, Arknights: Rise from Ember, has been announced! Lee's Detective Agency: [Youtube]

A mini-series animated in a chibi style with a comedic tone. Focused on the adventures of the Kuroblood-illustrated Lee's Detective Agency! Distributed by Crunchyroll globally, but entirely free to watch.

Closure's Secret Files: [Youtube]

A cut-out styled series of shorts hosted by Closure which outlines a lot of the game's basic mechanics!

Holy Knight Light: [Youtube]

A short OVA focusing around Penguin Logistics delivering a package, celebrating Arknights' first anniversary. Officially posted to Youtube!

Kay's Daily Doodles: [Youtube]

Another free, comedic Youtube mini-series, posted to the offical Arknights Youtube account and focused around Ceobe! Here's some additional animations! Each event usually also has a 15 second 2D animated preview of the event, but there's so many of those that I can't list them all. Anniversary Event 3D Animations: Zwillingstürme im Herbst So Long, Adele Lone Trail Where Vernal Winds Will Never Blow Il Siracusano Ideal City Stultifera Navis Invitation To Wine Near Light Dossoles Holiday Under Tides Bonus 3D Animated Shorts: Legend of Chongyue Arknights Special - IL Siracusano Lo Scontro Youtube Shorts: Ch'en and Lin's Watermelon Splitting Game Part 1 Ch'en and Lin's Watermelon Splitting Game Part 2 Amiya's Siracusan Food Guide Part 1 Amiya's Siracusano Food Guide Part 2 Amiya's Special Gift Doctor's Gifts in Return 1 Doctor's Gifts in Return 2

Comics, Manga, Manhua

Officially Translated:

Rhodes Island's Records of Originium: Rhine Lab: [Offical Source]

A canon manhua centered around the circumstances that lead to Silence falling out with Saria and joining Rhodes Island with Ifrit, as well as Ifrit's attempt to save a dying infected stowaway on the landship. Essential reading for understanding the Rhine Lab storyline and characters - read it right after Mansfield for when it was chronologically released! One of the characters, Darya, is mentioned in both Ifrit's module and briefly in Lone Trail.

Rhodes Island's Records of Originium: Blacksteel: [Official Source]

A short story focusing on the lives of the Blacksteel operators aboard the landship. While it often gets overshadowed by the Rhine Lab manga which is bigger in scope, this is a great read especially if you're interested in Franka or Liskarm.

Rhodes Kitchen -TIDBITS-: [Official Source]

An anthology story related to the cuisine that's important to a variety of operators. While it might seem unassuming, the art is gorgeous and it's really well-written! The Blacksteel, Rhine Lab, and Rhodes Kitchen manga have all been sold in physical copies, if you're interested in having them in print!

Prelude Suite: Cadenza Virtuosa: [Official Source]

An epilogue to Hortus De Escapismo focusing on Arturia's background, with the second chapter serving as a prelude for Zwillingstrume im Herbst! An excellent read to get better insight into Arturia's character.

Angelina: Sketches of this Messenger's Journey: [Official Source]

A more comedically focused manwha, centered on the adventures of Angelina travelling across Terra as a Messenger! Currently updating, with recent chapters focusing on Sami and Siesta!

Unofficially Translated

The Dagger's Inheritors: [Youtube]

A 15-minute short 3D animated film about W's past and relationship with Theresa, released for the 5th Arknights anniversary. Arknights Comic Anthology: [Mangadex]

As the title says, a series of non-canon anthology stories regarding the cast of Rhodes' Island! Some of the chapters on Mangadex for the later volumes of the Comic Anthology specifically have been machine translated, but the same is not true for the other manga shared here. Chapters are hit-and-miss, but the whole series is generally a fun read! See the original post for specific chapter suggestions.

123 Rhodes Island: [Mangadex]

A series of non-canon gag comics for the CN server, usually updated when new operators or events release!

Arknights: Operators!: [Mangadex]

A compilation of shortform manga posted on the official ArknightsJP twitter account! Thank you to @sleepywoodscans for their work on personally translating these!

Arknights: A1 Operations Preparation Detachment: [Mangadex]

Part of the Terra Historicus website and not yet officially translated, focusing on Fang, Kroos and Beagle before they join Rhodes Island, and a catastrophe striking the Columbian city of Tkaronto. Thank you to @pooce-art for their translation work!

Other:

Arknights Ambience Synesthesia: [Youtube]

A series of concerts (4 so far), focused around Arknights' music! A live performance has been done every year, with skins released in-game for the concert's theme & 3D animations produced featuring the skin's cast in 2022, 2023, and 2024.

Monster Siren Records: [Spotify] [Official Website]

Arknights' official (and-in-universe) record label publishing game OSTs, themes for almost every 6 star operator that releases, and occasional bonus songs.

Arknights: Endfield: [Twitter]

An upcoming 3D action gacha game from Hypergryph, set in the far future of Arknights' universe on another planet. Currently in closed beta testing for both EN and CN servers!

UNOFFICIAL:

Some fandom-developed tools that might be of use to you are: The Arknights Terra Wiki. While it is a very accurate source for in-game data, take the explanation of in-game story and some specific claims with a grain of salt. The FANDOM version of this wiki is currently no longer mantained and subject to vandalism! Given you can translate or read Chinese, PRTS.wiki is the current best resource for game assets!

As well, the Arknights Story Reader can help you catch up on stuff you don't want to or can't read in game! Jacob Moreau on Youtube provides voiceover readings of many in-game stories as well.

Finally, Aceship's Toolbox provides access to a variety of tools, including a levelling calculator, a calculator to ensure the best recruitments, and all the CGs, backgrounds and character sprites that are available in-game as of So Long, Adele (as far as I'm aware, the sprite/cg gallery is no longer being updated.)

Conclusion:

Thank you for reading! I hope this provided some new information to you or is an easy reference source in the future. Some things, such as merch (i.e. board games) or the official lore book have not been included due to not being accessible or translated for EN players. I'm happy to continue to provide more information like this to make the art surrounding this series more accessible! If you have any questions, feel free to send me an ask.

#arknights #i thought about just editing the original post but i felt like an update was in order! hope this is helpful to some people as the first one #was #:D #if there's anything i missed #let me know! and i'll edit it in #not as comprehensive but a little more concise than the previous version

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shegatsby · 4 years

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Whisper of Evil

Hannibal Lecter x Reader Request;

Hi! If you don’t mind I had another idea for a HannibalxReader story. Hannibal had raised an infant like his daughter and trained her in the fine arts of culinary and killing as soon as she was 18. He’s seen her grow up into a young talented woman, blending into the society as his adoptive daughter. Maybe she was gifted on her 20th birthday with her very own victim from Hannibal. Killing him without his help. Hannibal watched her, notices how hot she is and hello to the smut 🤤 Thank you 🥺🥰 @negans-attagirl

Warnings: Smut, IM TALKING WAP WAP WAP :D Age gap, Murder

A/N: I’ve changed the request a little. Enjoy. Sorry for any typos.

It was Y/N’s 20th birthday, and for her birthday Hannibal Lecter decided to throw the most luxurious birthday dinner party, ‘’Why didn’t we settled on a small party Hannibal?’’ Y/N came down the stairs in a beautiful gown, ‘’Because this year is special for both of us and I’ll do anything for you princess.’’ He watched her go down the stairs she had a long satin, lilac dress. She had makeup on and her signature red lips were glowing, yes she was a grown woman now and he knew that his guests would love to eat her up, this thought made him uneasy. ‘’You look divine Y/N.’’ He tried to sound casual but his thoughts were dark and twisted, ‘’Excuse me.’’ He went to open the door for his guests.

Servants were pouring champagne and any kind of wine, everyone wished her a happy birthday and told her how beautiful she looked, her close friends like Jack, Alana, Bedelia and Will gave her presents but her mind was somewhere else, Hannibal promised her a kill, it was going to be special because this time he was only planning to give her the name of the person and leave the rest to her, he wasn’t going to help her with anything. She hid her excitement and told them how much she liked the gifts. She remembered her 18th birthday, Hannibal took her to the basement and showed her his work of art and told her not to be afraid but she wasn’t afraid, in fact she was thrilled to see that.

Throughout the night they ate and talked, she was a well educated young woman and Hannibal did a good job on guiding her for years, she could talk about any novel and art subject, she could speak French, German and Russian (Hannibal though her those) and all men had their eyes on her which made Hannibal uncomfortable.

Deep down he knew why he was uncomfortable but he didn’t want to admit it, he put a hand on her waist and pulled her closer, she feel the warmth radiating from his body, she could smell his manly cologne, it smelled like pine trees.Later the guests wanted her to play the harpsichord (again Hannibal thought her how to play that) and she entertained them with the swift and vivid tunes, she liked the way they admired her and just like Hannibal she loved being the center of attention.

‘’Well done Miss, your fingers are magic.’’ A young man approached to her, ‘’Thank you Sir.’’

He extended his hand, ‘’Vincent Van Damme, pleasure to meet you.’’ And he kissed the back of her hand, ‘’Y/N Y/L/N Lecter, the pleasure is all mine.’’ She heard the Van Damme family before and they came from old money, probably have few skeletons in their closets. ‘’Lecter?’’ Vincent was confused, ‘’Hannibal Lecter took me under his wings when my parents passed away, I alos use his surname too, especially when I want to be invited to a party.’’ And she winked at him, it made him laugh which caught Hannibal’s attention. She knew what she was doing, she was flirting with him to get Hannibal’s attention, because for months Hannibal was distant and she had a theory about that and wanted to prove it.

‘’I’ve met Doctor Lecter few years ago,’’ and he started to tell her how they met, honestly she couldn’t care less, it was obvious that he wanted to sleep with her and was flirting with her she scanned the room with her tired eyes and found Hannibal’s dark eyes on her. Dark brown eyes… eyes that could make one scream in fear.

She touched Vincent’s arm gently, she was using psychological tricks from Hannibal’s weekly medical journals, Vincent looked happy.

Hannibal Lecter was trying to stay calm and he finished his drink quickly, ‘’You should slow down Hannibal.’’ Will said laughing, ‘’Excuse me for a moment.’’ He left them and walked towards Y/N and Vincent. ‘’Good evening.’’ He greeted Vincent, ‘’Hannibal, thank you for inviting me. The food was amazing, as always.’’ Hannibal put his hand on Y/N’s shoulder and squeezed hard, she didn’t flinch.

‘’Thank you Vincent, where is your wife?’’ He asked abruptly and pointed his ring finger which had no ring but the mark was still there.

The tension between them sent shivers to her private part, it was a damn good show to see Hannibal on alpha mode.

‘’She couldn’t make it… the kids and all that…’’ He was embarrassed,‘’That’s what I thought. Y/N follow me please.’’

And he held her hand and pulled her away from Vincent, she was giggling when they arrived upstairs bedroom.

‘’What is wrong with you? Is it the alcohol in your system that makes you behave like this? Please explain yourself.’’ He wasn’t yelling but when it comes to Hannibal he didn’t have to yell to make someone scared and dizzy. ‘’Nothing is wrong with me Hannibal. I.. I just wanted to flirt a little, I’m 20 years old you know that right?!’’ She crossed her arms and it gave her breasts a little push, Hannibal for a split second looked at her breasts and looked away, and that was the answer to her theory, he liked her.. very much. ‘’Do you want to know your gift’s name?’’ He changed the subject and was glad to see the shine in her Y/E/C eyes. He pulled out a business card from his pocket, gave it to her and left. She almost forgot to breathe, on the card it said

‘’Vincent Van Damme.’’

3 days later

It was late night and Y/N was at the winter cabin of Mr. Van Damme, ‘’Thank you for coming here with me Y/N.’’ he poured a glass of white wine for them, ‘’I should thank you for inviting me here, it is a beautiful place.. and has the gorgeous view.’’ She pointed the big window which had no curtains and she knew Hannibal was watching them. Her hands were shaking because she really didn’t want to fail him.

They cheered and drank, the fact that Vincent knows nothing about what’s going to happen to him made her body filled with adrenalin. ‘’Vincent darling, can you get me a blanket. I’m cold.’’ She looked at him with loving eyes and made her tone little bit seductive and Vincent went upstairs to fulfill his task.

She was good at Herbology and she made specific poison for Vincent and named it ‘’Dolosus’’ it meant cheater in latin. She applied it on her lips, it looked like a shiny gloss and she exactly had 2 minutes to wipe it off or otherwise she would be dead.

‘’Here is your blanket love.’’ She wanted to vomit.

Vincent noticed the so called lip gloss, ‘’Looks tasty.’’ Vincent had a wicked smile, his blue eyes on her lips. ‘’Wanna try?’’

He pulled her for a kiss, it was long when they parted his lips were blue. She pulled out a napkin and wiped the poison off of her lips. She got up to wash her mouth and when she came back she was him on the ground trying to breathe, ‘’W- whatss happening to mee?’’ he managed to say. ‘’That’s what you get when you cheat on your wife, love.’’

Hannibal knocked on the door and Y/N let him in, he was smiling when he was Vincent on the ground.

‘’I loved your technique darling but..’’ he turned to face her, her cheeks were flushed. ‘’You just ruined our food.’’ And they both laughed together. She touched her arm while laughing and left his hand on her hand, his hand was warm. When they stopped Hannibal cupped her cheek, ‘’Well done Y/N, I’m proud of you.’’ His brown eyes went to her lips, ‘’Are they poison free?’’ he asked smiling. She didn’t say anything but leaned to kiss his plump lips.

Hannibal was in shock first, he couldn’t believe this was happening but soon he replied to her kiss, he gently pushed on the couch, one of the things about him was that he was a gentleman, that’s what made her drawn to him but she knew that once they were intimate that gentleman would be a hungry man. She wasn’t wrong. She had a dark red winter dress and she felt his hand pulling the dress few inches, his fingers hot against her shivering body. She yanked him closer, his tall body was flushed against hers, she could feel his arousal on her stomach. ‘’Do you want me?’’

He pulled away and asked her, searching for any discomfort in her beautiful eyes, ‘’Yes.’’ She was panting, ‘’Things I’m going to do to you… you won’t be able to walk the next week darling.’’ She felt her cunt vibrate with his words. ‘’Promise?’’ She asked with a smirk, ‘’Promise.’’

She helped him get rid of his clothes, it was the very first time she saw him naked and she had to swallow. ‘’Like what you see?’’ He grabbed his member to give it a few pumps. She nodded, he was huge. ‘’Undress for me.’’

He sat on the couch and watched her slowly took of her dress, she had matching underwear, a black bra and black lace panties. She was always insecure about her body but not tonight, the way he looked at her told her whatever affirmation she needed to hear, ‘’Divine, Aphrodite would be jealous of you.’’

The couch was big enough for them and the next thing she knew was that she was under him, kissing and biting his lips. He moved to her exposed neck and left marks there, came down to her breasts, toyed with them like Hephaestus playing with metal and working his magic. She could feel herself getting wetter each second, he was ravenous, his hands were caressing every part of her, his hot mouth camto her aching core. He inhaled her womanly scent and it made her blush, she wanted to close the gap between her legs but he stopped her. ‘’Never be shy around me Y/N, you are a magnificent woman who deserves to be worshiped and often.’’

He was giving her cunt good licks, he was talented, he kept her legs apart and dived in. She was panting and writhing, he decided to press his finger in and her head fell back. He was pumping slowly, a soft moan left her when he added the second finger, his thumb was circling her clit he kept his movements until she came. His hands left red marks on her legs and she liked it, ‘’Are you ready for me?’’ he watched her body, she looked up to see him, his face was flushed and his pupils were dilated.

‘’Yes daddy.’’ She surprised herself and thought she ruined the moment because Hannibal closed his eyelids and stopped pumping his juicy cock. The pre-cum was dripping, ‘’Hannibal I’m s-‘’

‘’Say it again.’’

His dream just came true, he literally had dreams of Y/N calling him daddy while he was fucking her raw.

‘’Daddy please fuck my pussy.’’

He placed himself between her wide open legs, she felt his tip and shivered. He eased into her, stretching her open, his hands were tight on her thighs. He started to move with control, fully in and fully out, ‘’Harder daddy please..’’ she moaned into his ear.

He let loose, the sound of their skin slapping, the crazy sensation of his hard dick.. it was too much. He wasn’t shy and hearing his moans shocked her, he was a starved man. He was kissing her as he fucked her, biting her lower lip until she was bleeding, he knew she liked it. She reached to her peak, ‘’Daddy oh fuck..’’

‘’Open your mouth.’’ And he spit in her mouth, watched her swallow, ‘’Good girl.’’

He came after her, chanting her name as if it’s a prayer. Her slick was covering him when he emptied himself into her, when it was over he laid on her, careful not to hurt her and she caressed his soft hair, he chuckled under his breath,

‘’We have to clean the place before we leave. Remember the rules, never leave your DNA.’’

Thank you for reading. :)

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kn1feinthec0ffee · 4 years

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love me love me (say that you love me) - spencer reid

spencer reid x fem!reader

title from lovefool by the cardigans

summary: after a close brush with death in the field, y/n visits an injured spencer in the hospital to have a heart to heart.

warnings: a lil bit of angst, fluff bc im incapable of writing pure angst, descriptions of injury

word count: 1,987

notes: this is my submission for @veraiconcos‘ fic writer challenge, i spent a super long time on this and i really hope you guys enjoy it as its one of my favorite things i’ve ever written ☺️

********************

settling in to what would be another evening of unfortunate, unwanted solitude due to your boyfriend having yet another late night at work, you stretched out across the sofa, wine glass in hand, ready to relax after a hard day’s work.

that was until your phone began to ring and vibrate obnoxiously across the wooden coffee table.

“jj? hi, what’s up?” you inquired, curious as to why she was calling you during a case.

“we got the guy, but spence wasn’t so lucky.” she began hesitantly. “he almost got shot, but he was stabbed a few times.”

she heard your stifled gasp through the speaker, cutting you off before you would inevitably begin rambling off questions, a habit of spencer’s you’d acquired after a long while of knowing him. “don’t worry, he keeps telling everyone he’s fine. doctor says the wounds might scar, but overall he should be alright.”

you scrunched your eyes closed, willing your racing heart to slow with the news that spencer would be okay. despite jj’s calming tone and the relatively good news from the call, you couldn’t help the nagging feeling that your boyfriend was not, in fact, okay.

“thanks, babe. would you mind telling me where you guys are? am i allowed to come visit?” your voice took on a hopeful tone that your hands betrayed, anxiously twirling a loose strand of hair that had fallen out of your bun.

“visiting hours ended a little while ago, but i’m sure i can pull a few strings for you.” your chest deflated with a relieved sigh at the thought of having visual confirmation spencer would be fine. “i just texted you the address, see you soon, y/n.”

“you too. bye,” the phone dropped onto the table with a hollow clatter. you downed what little was left in your wine glass before standing up from the sofa to get ready. you still couldn’t shake the feeling that something was up with spencer so you put in an extra bit of effort to wear some of his favorite pieces of clothing of yours, just to bring a smile to his face.

———————————————

after receiving special clearance from jj at the front desk, you headed down the hallway. you never liked hospitals; you found something about about the stark white, sterile halls cold and off putting.

the door slowly opened, a gentle creak emanating from its well-used hinges. you had hoped your entrance would be quiet enough to let the boy wonder rest, but alas, he had woken up.

though the way his irises glistened in the artificial light when he saw you was just as gratifying.

“y/n, what are you doing here?” the interrogative sounded less like a question and more like an exclamation of awe, but you weren’t complaining.

“what, you didn’t think i’d show up when a little birdie told me my boyfriend was stabbed on duty? some girlfriend i’d be,” you scoffed sarcastically.

the plastic legs of the chair skidded across the linoleum as you dragged it next to the bed. spencer held out a hand towards you to hold, a sure fire sign something was wrong.

he loved affection, especially from you, but he only seemed to initiate it on blue moons.

you gratefully slipped your fingers in between his and gave them a quick, reassuring squeeze. “what happened, hon?”

his amber hues flicked to several spots around the relatively uninteresting room before landing on your intertwined digits. “we raided his apartment just like we usually do and i happened to be the first one to come across him. i saw he had a gun and i’m lucky i ducked pretty quickly or else i might not even be here at all.

“morgan and i moved in on him to make the arrest, but it slipped our minds that the profile said he was hyper-vigilant and paranoid, and i failed to notice knife he had in his other hand and he stabbed me a few times before emily pulled him away from me.” spencer recalled with an expertise that came as a surprise to absolutely no one who knew him.

“you say that like you’re reciting a poem,” you frowned, rubbing a thumb across his knuckles. “you could’ve died, spence.”

“i guess it’s just not that big of a deal to me?” he seemed to question his own statement as it passed through his lips. “i think i’ve grown so accustomed to putting my life on the line that i just doesn’t even faze me anymore.”

“i get it, but don’t you ever - i don’t know - get worried you won’t come back to me one of these days?” you averted your eyes to the floor.

his grip on your hand tightened exponentially, causing your gaze to snap up to his. “of course i do, i worry about you all the time. isn’t it normal to worry about the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?”

his admission of love brought heat to your cheeks and tears to your eyes. “good, good, i’m glad we both agree on that then.” you smiled sadly.

the presence of an oddly heavy silence weighed down on both of you as you sat in thought. “do you ever get tired, y/n?” the genius queried quietly, elaborating when he noticed the confusion etched across your features. “i mean - well - tired of me? of my life being on the line every time i go to work? of thinking that maybe that time you said goodbye to me when i left would be the last time? doesn’t that exhaust you?”

this was exactly what you had been anticipating since jj called. the drawn-out periods of unusual silence, less eye contact than normal, the anxious fidgeting. not that you’d tell him, but you’d subtly began subconsciously profiling as well.

“if you’re asking if i get tired of those things, then yes, i do,” you murmured softly. “but if you’re asking if being with you while i have to deal with all those things is exhausting, then my answer is no. absolutely not.”

another pause. spencer played with your fingers, fiddling around with the ring he’d bought for you as fond memories swirled through his mind. “wouldn’t it be easier if you were with someone else? i don’t know, maybe someone with an average career where they don’t look at dead bodies and arrest serial killers all the time? maybe a barista or something less traumatizing than what i do?”

your lips curled up into a smile as you giggled. “yeah, i mean, of course that’d be easier, but when has life ever been easy? and besides, why would i want a barista when i could have a badass, genius iq level guy like you?”

he grinned, holding eye contact for the longest period of time since you passed through the door. “i think those attributes directly contradict each other, but whatever makes you happy, love.”

the tension had lifted, conversation flowing with ease, yet you could still tell there was something off about reid. something left unspoken.

“hey,” you murmured, brushing a stray strand of hair out of his face. “you sure you’re alright?”

a moment of hesitation flickered through his eyes before he answered. “of course i am. didn’t i say i was?”

“you did, but you don’t have the best track record when it comes to being honest about your emotions.” you watched several emotions pass through his eyes - one of his tells; those hazel hues could be read like a book.

he seemed to take a deep, collective inhale before he spoke in a small voice. “i know you said you weren’t tired of me, but i’m just scared you’re lying. n-not that i think you would ever be untruthful,” he immediately corrected himself upon understanding how his words could be perceived.

“i-” tears brimmed his coffee colored optics, terrifying you for what he might say next. “you’re the most important thing in my life- in the world even- and i’m just worried you’ll leave me. i’ll come home one night when you’ve decided you’ve had enough of this life and you have all your bags packed, ready to leave. i don’t want to lose you. i can’t lose you.”

noticing a few drops had landing on your lap, you realized you’d been crying as he admitted his insecurities to you. “i love you so much, spencer. more than anything in the world. and i know how hard it is to quiet those voices, and i know whatever i say will only be enough to quell them for a while, but you’re everything to me. just know i would never, ever even dream of leaving you.”

you sniffled, wiping the tear tracks from your face when you looked over to spencer. he held eye contact with you, something you knew was challenging for him to do.

“y/n,” he moved a hand to cup your cheek. “if i asked you to stay, would you?”

you let his words sink in and nodded nearly imperceptibly. you laid a kiss on his palm before turning to him again. “absolutely. i am wholly and completely devoted to you, spencer reid.”

his cheeks burned and his brows furrowed, almost as if he was having trouble accepting your straightforward answer. “do you promise?”

you debated a sarcastic response, but you were unsure what his reaction might be in such a vulnerable state, and you didn’t want to find out.

“i do, my love.” you murmured, crossing your pinky with his. he settled, visibly, too, at your admission of adoration. you knew he struggled with fully trusting those around him and you were immeasurably proud of him in this moment.

“are you heading home?” his soft lilt broke the silence that had blanketed the room with its persistent presence. “i wouldn’t blame you if you were.”

“are you kidding? after all that rom-com sappiness you think i want to leave?” you both laughed, basking in the positivity of the moment. “i’m afraid you’re stuck with me. look, i even brought a change of clothes and everything.”

while you loved the adorable look of surprise on his face, you almost wished you could wipe away any doubts he may harbor in his mind about you and your unwavering loyalty. you looked up at him again as he spoke. “are you going to sleep in that chair?”

“i’d lay with you, but you’ve got wounds everywhere and no way in hell am i risking re-opening anything that’s been sealed.” you held your hands up in mock defense, earning a chuckle from the doctor.

“you could, um, put your head on my chest,” his cheeks tinted pink. “i love it when you do that.” you planted a quick kiss on his cheekbone before pressing a longer one to his lips.

every time your lips met, as cliched as it was, it felt like the first again. not in every way, they were missing the same awkward teeth clashing and spit swapping as the original, but you could almost feel every ounce of passion jolting all the way through your being. and most assuredly, spencer reciprocated your feelings as he chased your lips every single time they made to retreat from his.

you pulled the chair as close to the hospital bed as you could and rested your head on his chest. the lyrical, constant beat of spencer’s lulled you to sleep, creating a symphony just for you.

before your eyes closed, you intertwined spencer’s fingers with yours, prompting him to look down at you. “i’ve got promises to keep, and miles to go before i sleep.”

though he knew it was medically impossible, spencer reid’s heart leapt a mile in his chest at the irrevocable love he felt for you, both in that moment and always as he completed the line, “and miles to go before i sleep.”

********************

guys wait i think this is the first ending i’ve written that i actually enjoy and i just finished this at 1am last night and i am so sleep deprived

please let me know if you want to be added/removed from my taglist!!

tags: @sojournmichael @stinkyelf @crazyfore3 @cal-ifornication @eggygorl02 @howdycharlie @eosprincess @mortallythoughtfulgurl @illuxions-x @unlikelyempathpruneauthor @blankets-for-bees @holycandypizza @flyingbabyunicornnamedangel @lovelyrdjr @minnie-bby @fantastic-fans @ashwarren32 @rexorangecouny @elitereid @keomoon @achieveonyourown @whogirl7 @jjtheangel @carol-danvers-wife

#vicficwriterchallenge #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid oneshot #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fic #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid criminal minds #criminal minds #cm #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler character #mgg #mgg character #my writing

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samanthasroberts · 7 years

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Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

Id call it time traveling. Most of the time I didnt know I was doing it until I was already in too deep. It didnt matter the day of the week or the time, or who I was with. I was just as capable of bending time alone, as I was with a handful of friends.

There was no such thing as one or two or three drinks. Just like a two headed giraffe didnt exist, neither did grabbing a couple of drinks. Its that simple. I really cant explain it any other way. My average was a drink every fifteen minutes. I never thought about that. I didnt brag about it or work towards it or talk about it, my rhythm just happened. The drink was in my hand and I drank it. I didnt think of slowing down or having an empty hand.

Id start somewhere- at an apartment or at dinner or a happy hour or on a date and Id arm myself with whatever I was in the mood for. There were the regular players: Jack Daniels and diet coke, chardonnay, Redbull and vodka, Blue Moon and those few years in my early 20s where I thought the only two drinks on the planet was a Sex On The Beach and Cosmo. Drink menus were for amateurs.

Never red wine though. It stained my teeth and lips, Id explain when asked, and respond with my quirky I only drink it alone and in the dark answer. Theyd always laugh.

For a long time the only shot I tossed back was Patron XO. Lemon drops and Kamikazes were too collegiate for me. I was smart enough to know that I always got sick after Whiskey. That was my kryptonite. It didnt stop me from drinking it again (and again), just in case getting sick was a one time thing. Spoiler alert: it wasnt.

So that was me, always, from the first time I got drunk during a party at 16 years old to my four day New Years Eve bender at age 30. But lets not call it a bender, or else my parents will worry. It was celebrating a new year with friends. It was a vacation and a belated birthday. It was me letting present, in the moment Diana take the wheel for a few days.

By the time YOLO was on T-shirts I had carpe diem booze down to a science.

It was all so normal and always OK: competing with friends how many guys we can make out with in one night (one of my favorite games), bouncing around speakeasys in the East Village, sneaking into the high end member only clubs in the Meatpacking District, 4am pancakes at a diner then going home with the cutest guy there, leaving without paying your tab, putting your drinks on a strangers tab, hooking up with your friends crush, sleeping with a guy who has a girlfriend (what, he had an accent, ok?), telling work you have a doctors appointment when you need an extra hour of sleep, telling work youre sick when youre too hungover to get out of bed, napping in the bathroom stall at work when you realize you went to work still drunk.

Theres wasnt a problem with any of this. I could go to six bars in a night and only remember two of them (seetime traveling). Others had different, less poetic names for it- like graying out or even more ominous, going black out. But lets not talk about that. Those words are scary.

It all just made so much sense to me. I had a desperate thirst for life, for new experiences and stories that were only mine and drinking was my very own special key to open that door. I dont remember being trained but I knew this truth: that I needed to drink- to have fun, to meet a guy, to de-stress, to celebrate, after a bad day, after a good day, when its more than 50 degrees out, when its under 15 degrees, because its Monday.

Its dramatic sounding, I know, but when I was drinking, like really in the middle of a good run, I was untouchable. My thoughts evened out and worries were left at the coat check. I was charming and funny. I was weightless and sexy. Nothing could ground me.

I wasnt stupid. I knew what was happening. There wasnt a river in Egypt. The biggest part was the after, when Morning Diana gradually and reluctantly pixelated back into place ready to droop down into the exorcist-like hangover.

When I was in college my hangover cure was strawberries and chocolate milk. After I received my diploma I graduated to well-done bacon, coffee, Mimosas. Water never entered the equation.

Sometime in my mid-twenties while I was gripping on to my spinning couch, I googled hangover and depression and was so relieved when I read the phrase emotional hangover. I immediately felt better seeing the feeling I felt printed on my screen. It was a relief: I wasnt alone in this feeling and it had a name. Urban Dictionary knows about it so it must be OK. Ill finish my bacon and chocolate milkshake and be just ducky.

The recovery time was always different- sometimes I could slide out of bed and be partially human the next day and other times I needed a day alone to stew in a mental playback of the night before. During those days the biggest challenge was the trek from my bedroom to couch. No matter how I recouped I never thought it was bad. I thought my friends were doing it too.

Country songs and Van Wilder confirmed for me that getting drunk and hangovers were a part of life. I never raised my hand to question it. So, about the men. I bet you thought it was hard to find a man with all this time zig zagging and space jumping but it wasnt. Lets go back ten years again and Ill tell you about all the threesomes I had. It was me, the guy, and alcohol.

It was how I flirted, played, connected, and bonded with men, always. If the boyfriend had a bad day wed start downing drinks in the hopes that hed open up and talk to me. To flirt with the new cute coworker Id suggest we play beer after work. Hed find it charming and cute and wed drunkenly made out in the corner of the bar after swapping 1st pet names and office gossip. I had a fling with a British banker off and on for 3 years and when wed meet late night hed pour us shots of tequila first. It was our thing. Our inside joke with Don Julio.We didnt know each others last names but we shared an appreciation for top shelf tequila at 3am before having sex. Im a romantic, I know.

My favorite three words when I was with a guy were Want another round?

During each encounter, each date, I wouldnt feel satisfied until I heard those words. He could shout it or whisper it in my ear, either way I wanted those words. It meant: he liked me, hes having a good time, and he wanted to keep spending time with me. He didnt want the night to end. It meant intimacy, it meant hand holding and flirty eyes and of course, sex.

I could count the number of times I had sober sex on one hand. I didnt enjoy it. To avoid it, Id explain that I simply didnt like morning sex. Most of the time Id be too hungover to move from a fetal position so it wasnt pursued for long on his end anyway. Hooking up drunk was sexy and fun. We could let our inhibitions go and really connect. Fun was had by all. I wasnt worried about any of it.

Theres unfortunately worse parts. Im not going to tell them to you though. Mostly because my mother may read this. But also because I was once told that you dont need to go all the way to the bottom floor in order to get off the elevator. So lets baby step off the lift, shall we?

I was in one of my first sessions with my new therapist when she told me I repeated the word untouchable a lot and made me explain why I thought that was a good word. (See all of the above for my response). Valentines Day was two weeks away and I was mentally preparing to be single again during my least favorite holiday of the year.

I wasnt too worried though because Id participate in my friends annual BOVD- Black Out Valentines Day. The year before included colorful fish bowls and sushi till 2am. Problem solved. I was talking but realizing more and more how much she looked like Lily Tomlin when she put a piece paper down in front of me. It was a wordy contract with bullet points in the middle and a blank line next to my name at the bottom.

I was supposed to go a week without drinking. Thats a lie. I could drink. But only three glasses of beer or wine, two different nights. If I broke the contract I had to give $100 to her. Lily was crazy. How was this legal? I couldnt do this. Fact. I shouldnt have even been there. I wanted to deal with this but apparently not by actually dealing with it. I argued with her and left the session with the unsigned document squished to the bottom of my purse. That night I didnt sleep and express ordered Alan Carrs Easy Way to Control Alcohol. Problem solved. I went out drinking all week. And I drank like no one was watching.

Then I signed the contract. And then when week one ended, I signed the next contract. Was it easy? Fuck no. Did I have to write some checks to my therapist? Yes. Did I cry? Did I rant? Did my hands and mind twitch and turn during dinners with friends as I stared at my 1 drink for the night? Hell to the yes. Most nights all I could think about was my hand stammering under the table and how much I wanted and needed another drink.

I thought of the contract and Lilys annoying face staring down at me. I thought of how I felt when I was hungover. I thought of the fuzzy nights. I thought of the fuzzy years. I cried a lot. I stayed in and watched Netflix even more. I watched Vampire Diaries starting at season 1, many times. In therapy I compared my drunk self to being a vampire with no soul. There are many different points of view on vampire rule and regulations but most of them agree that the creatures of the night have no soul. Stick with me here. In Vampire Diaries the rule of thumb is that vampires can turn this soul switch off and on. When its on they feel everything, when its off they feel nothing and become untouchable. Follow me now? The easy way to live is to keep the switch off. I did that, over and over again. I was tired of it and wanted to be in the world of the living again. I didnt decide this overnight. It took months, a lot more episodes of Vampire Diaries and most of 2015. Something weird happened around the same time I switched to watching new episodes of Arrow that wouldve really pissed off my 23 year old Cosmo drinking self- I stopped enjoying drinking.

By November I was completely sober and joined a boxing ring. I could get up in the morning and exercise. I didnt need to sign a contract anymore. I sober dated. I sober celebrated friends birthdays. I sober had a fun Thursday night. I went to AA meetings sometimes and spent most of the meeting listening and nodding my head. I was funny and smart and friendly during the day and I was funny and smart and friendly at night. I added to my own life and stopped letting drinking take away from it. I started a social group. I started a book club. I started.

Sometime between the last crippling snow storm of last year and planning my 31st birthday, I stopped wanting to go to Edit Undo. I re-entered my own life. I went through those years and theyre a part of me for worse or worser. I went through it before knowing there was another side. I hit my rock bottoms (yes, there was more than one). Im still learning how to talk about it- what I want to say about it and to who. But the further I get from the person I was then, the more I like who Im turning into now. But letting go of her seemed like an impossible ask that the tiny tired voice deep inside me was begging for.

If I stopped drinking Id lose all of me, not just a part. I was terrified as if I was going to lose a limb or my hearing. My life would be filled withwhat? Id have no buoy or security blanket or man behind the curtain. Id be dry, unfilled, just curved edges and rims. The thought paralyzed me.

Now, Im at this other side. Im still learning what this other side is like and who I am in it. But I do know this- Im more now than I was before. Im more me and more strong and more present. I feel more and I listen to me more.

Days are now broken up between feeling this raw, strength of life and connection to people and namastes and really fantastic Im part of the universe and not from vibes to a total, giant uncertainty and instability, and anger and exhaustion. I never knew I could get tired of feelings. Weve moved in together, you see. We wake up together and go to bed together and they insist on forming an invisible fanny pack around my waist during the day. Hello intimacy, party of two. Theyre normally the big spoon. My thoughts continue from one moment to the next and connect without taking breaks. I had years and years of turning myself on and off and more off and now I just want to be on.

I wish I could say that when I wake up sober now, Im not depressed anymore or lonely, my friends became better friends, I became the perfect best friend, sister and daughter, and my love life came together Prince Charming Cinderella style. But becoming more sober didnt mean everything clicked into place, it just means I see the pieces more clearly and I dont hide from the messy parts.

So now whatdo I become resentful and guilty and depressed thinking about the years I spent avoiding intimacy and feelings and honesty and fuck, concrete memories? Do I think those years dont count? Do I blame my bad habits on the constant excess of New York City? Do I blame the alcoholic-like attributes that run in my blood line? Do I blame my friends? Or the work hard play hard Don Draper industry I work in? Do I blame shitty men boys?

Yes, to all of the above. I point the finger at all of them and then back at me, and then at them and back at me. Lily says hi.

Ive had men yell at me, not being able to grasp the idea of my moderated drinking habits, insisting that Im just pretending I dont drink because I wanted them to buy me drinks. I dont get it either. No means no guys. My friendships have changed, my god have my friendships changed. One friend who pre-games with a bottle of wine (a standard respectable approach I once followed), on multiple occasions, dumped her wine into my water when she realized I wasnt drunk like she was. Yeah, I dont spend time with her anymore.

I went sixty days without drinking before I decided to drink again. For me it was like breaking up with a boyfriend and then meeting up again two months later. Never a good idea. Youll never want to be just friends who catch every up every now and then. I drank Vueve Clicquot and it didnt make the night better but it didnt make it worse. I didnt gray out. I didnt break down. That night isnt fuzzy. I could wake up in the morning.

Theres been other times when I drank recently and couldnt move far from the couch. Those times are a quick, slap in the face of what not to do. But old feelings and doubts still come flooding back in. Will I always want another drink? Why cant I just stay sober? Why does everyone make it look so easy? Is my therapist actually Lily Tomlin?

Deep down I know the majority of my problems start and stop with alcohol. Drinking will always be a part of my life whether Im drinking or not. Itd be easier to figure out if I wasnt both the variable and constant in this little conundrum of mine.

Today, I stare all the feels in the face, and make sure they know the last sixteen years matter but the last thirteen months matter even more. Im not her anymore, Im a different, more me now.

Im not 100% sober and I dont know if I ever will be. One day, maybe sooner rather than later, I could decide to sign up for a sober lifestyle again. But right now, I cant imagine midnight on New Years Eve without a champagne toast. I can do without five toasts but one still feels OK to me. So yeahmy relationship with drinking? We file it under Its complicated.

The good news is, Ive learned how to unwind on a Friday night without the trifecta of a bottle of wine, pizza and Netflix. My secret is just pizza and Netflix.

Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/13/getting-sober-redefining-my-longest-relationship/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/11/13/getting-sober-redefining-my-longest-relationship/

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adambstingus · 7 years

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Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

Never red wine though. It stained my teeth and lips, Id explain when asked, and respond with my quirky I only drink it alone and in the dark answer. Theyd always laugh.

By the time YOLO was on T-shirts I had carpe diem booze down to a science.

When I was in college my hangover cure was strawberries and chocolate milk. After I received my diploma I graduated to well-done bacon, coffee, Mimosas. Water never entered the equation.

My favorite three words when I was with a guy were Want another round?

Yes, to all of the above. I point the finger at all of them and then back at me, and then at them and back at me. Lily says hi.

Today, I stare all the feels in the face, and make sure they know the last sixteen years matter but the last thirteen months matter even more. Im not her anymore, Im a different, more me now.

The good news is, Ive learned how to unwind on a Friday night without the trifecta of a bottle of wine, pizza and Netflix. My secret is just pizza and Netflix.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/13/getting-sober-redefining-my-longest-relationship/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/167431371812

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allofbeercom · 7 years

Text

Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

Never red wine though. It stained my teeth and lips, Id explain when asked, and respond with my quirky I only drink it alone and in the dark answer. Theyd always laugh.

By the time YOLO was on T-shirts I had carpe diem booze down to a science.

When I was in college my hangover cure was strawberries and chocolate milk. After I received my diploma I graduated to well-done bacon, coffee, Mimosas. Water never entered the equation.

My favorite three words when I was with a guy were Want another round?

Yes, to all of the above. I point the finger at all of them and then back at me, and then at them and back at me. Lily says hi.

Today, I stare all the feels in the face, and make sure they know the last sixteen years matter but the last thirteen months matter even more. Im not her anymore, Im a different, more me now.

The good news is, Ive learned how to unwind on a Friday night without the trifecta of a bottle of wine, pizza and Netflix. My secret is just pizza and Netflix.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/11/13/getting-sober-redefining-my-longest-relationship/

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jimdsmith34 · 7 years

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Whats Worse For Your BrainDrinking or Playing Football?

Our correspondent drinks for a living. Is he putting his brain at more risk of damage than a football player?

I woke up Sunday morning with a throbbing headache. Id spent the previous night heavily sampling a selection of rare whiskeys with some friends.

That may have been fun, but now here I was, still in bed at 11 a.m., barely able to keep my eyes open, hardly able to think, certainly not wanting to turn on the days NFL games.

A parent cant consent to giving their kids a cigarette or a beerwhy can they consent to him playing tackle football?

And I thought this cannot be good for my brain.

The effect of NFL action on the brain is one of the hottest topics of the moment, with the movie Concussion opening this Christmas weekend.

In that film Will Smith portrays Bennet Omalu, the forensic pathologist who first brought to light the appearance of CTE (chronic traumatic encephalopathy) in American football players.

Thanks partially to Omalus work, nowadays when we watch the constant brutality on the football field, when we see players crashing their heads into each other down after down, when we notice aging players getting dementia (and worse) once retired, many of us have even started to wonder, Can I ethically enjoy football any more? Myself included.

At the same time, though, I often put my own brain in serious jeopardy too.

Yes, I am a professional drinks writer. Mid-day cocktail tastings. Evening scotch samplings. Beer festivals on the weekends. Trips to breweries, distilleries, and wineries. You should see how much free liquor gets delivered to my house on a daily basis!

People often tell me I must have one of the best jobs around. But they arent the ones that have had to drink literally every single day for hell, who knows how many days in a row it has been now. They arent the ones that wake up many mornings with a hangoverjust another occupational hazard.

So, with all this in mind, I decided to ask some football concussion doctors about the effects of my equally dangerous profession on my own precious brain. I wondered, how bad is my drinking compared to playing football?

Was a single whiskey shot equal to a QB sack?

A night of heavy beer drinking equal to a half of football?

Did my brutal Sunday morning hangover feel worse than it did on a Monday morning for a running back?

Neither Dr. Omalunor Will Smithreturned any of my calls, but luckily I had other accomplished doctors willing to answer my questions.

Dr. William Barr is the Director of Neuropsychology at NYU Langone Medical Center.

He is a clinical expert on epilepsy, forensic neuropsychology, and sports concussions. He has testified in numerous cases involving forensics and in civil cases involving MTBI (mild traumatic brain injury). More importantly, from the mid-1990s until 2004, Barr was a neuropsychological medical consultant for the NFLs New York Jets.

He quickly understood the somewhat silly concept behind this piece, and even why a professional drinks writer had reason to be concerned.

I used to think about boxers, he told me, noting that this was before all this concussion talk was in the mainstream. People used to say boxing was the only way for a kid to get out of the ghettobut he had to put his brain at risk. How terrible it was that society forced them to do this! But I also thought about the typical Mad Men-era businessmen. They had to do the three-martini lunches for their workthey too were pickling their brains just to get ahead!

Barr is a bit of a firebrand when it comes to talk about concussions. In fact, he believes concussionswhether from football or otherwiseactually have a fairly minimal impact on future cognitive functioning.

When you look at the studies and what happens three months after a concussiondo you know what meta-analysis is? he asks. I dont. He explains that, In science, rather than making conclusions based on a single study, you look at all the literature. Put it into a similar metric. Whats the overall effect based on many, many studies? So now, maybe, youre looking at 300 people over 10 studies. What it shows is the overall effect (on your brain) of a concussion after 30 days is lower than the effects of intoxication.

The study Barr is citing is Grant L. Iversons 2005 paper Outcome from Mild Traumatic Brain Injury.

Iverson didnt study alcohols traumatic effect on the brain per se, but he did find chronic cannabis use to be worse on overall neuropsychological functioning than an MTBI (mild traumatic brain injury) was on a person just one to three months after the injury had occurred. Likewise, he found chronic cannabis use to be slightly worse on future memory functioning than an MTBI.

For Barr, that was enough for him to deduce for me that alcohol abuse would be probably likewise worse on the brain than head injuries from playing football. Uh oh.

Barr isnt completely speculating, as he has co-authored his own significant studies. With a team of other doctors and PhDs he helped pen Cumulative Effects Associated with Recurrent Concussion in Collegiate Football Players and Acute Effects and Recovery Time Following Concussion in Collegiate Football Players.

Ive studied athletes more than the general population. With them we can get information before their injury and then after, he tells me. And what that shows is that 95 percent (of athletes who have a concussion) recover back to normal in 7 days or less.

He tests alcoholics brains in a similar manner to how he tests concussed athletes. He interviews them and then gives them a series of tests, ones mainly based on memory functioning (they have to remember a certain story).

So I might notice, this person has problems with attention and remembering things. In the past theyve been a 10-drinks-a-day alcoholic and now it looks like theyve pickled brain.

Though well-honored and quite thorough, you can probably see how Barr is considered a bit of a contrarian for his thinking on concussions.

Barr was even dismissed from the NFLs MTBI committee in 2004 by then-chairman Elliot Pellman, another former New York Jets team physician who is not without his own controversy.

I wanted another doctors opinion on my potentially pickling brain. Dr. James Paci, a professor and orthopedic surgeon, specializes in sports medicine at Stony Brook University Medicine. Hes also the football teams doctor.

First, he clarified that he was neither a neurologist nor brain physician. Despite that, he was trained to deal with concussions on a day-in, day-out basis in his own role as team doctor.

My expertise is how do we treat these athletes, Paci told me. What do we look out for? How do we prevent long term consequences?

However, unlike Barr, Paci somewhat struggled with the comparisons I was hoping he would draw for me.

Certainly there is some connection between alcoholism and Alzheimers, brain diseases. Drawing a parallel between drinking and football though? I dont think anyone has made that correlation. Though he does note, The rock n roll lifestyle and athlete lifestyle certainly do have some comparisons.

A man like Paci believes that both football and drinking are inherently dangerous, but thats OK, so long as we acknowledge the risk involved in both activities and, thus, let potential participants make informed decisions.

Ive had concussions before, Paci tells me. Anyone who plays sports has had one before.

Paci is about my age, having played football at Yale University in the late-1990s, while the slightly-older Barr played during a time head injuries werent treated all that seriously.

Back in the day when I played high school football, Barr tells me, you pretty much had to be in a coma before they did anything about it.

So both men had played football at a fairly high level, had head injuries on the field, and were still able to become prestigious doctors. But did they drink?

Not routinely, but I do, Paci tells me. Most doctors do. There are certainly benefits to some alcohol.

(Ive been saying that for years.)

I do, Barr also tells me. Everything in moderation. A little bit of alcohol can be good for the heart. Theres good data for the red wines. Some scotch in moderation, a finger a day maybe.

So you guys drink, but now knowing what you know, would you let your own children play football?

On that point Paci is fairly strict, believing young children simply dont have the body control and should stick to flag football or two-hand touch.

A parent cant consent to giving their kids a cigarette or a beerwhy can they consent to him playing tackle football?

Barr has a six-month grandson he absolutely wants to play football some day.

Should that boy play football or not? My take, from what we know right now: the chance of getting dementia, the prospect of a 13-year-old boy who starts football getting dementia one day is, lets say, 1 to 2 percent. Im being liberal, Barr tells me. But lets say that boy is not allowed to play football. Instead junior becomes fat and gets diabetes and high blood pressure. Now he has a 30 percent chance of dying of dementia.

So to Barr inactivity in this country is a much bigger problem than helmet-to-helmet contactinteresting, because drinkers on the whole are statistically much more active than non-drinkers according to the Center for Advancing Health.

That papers lead author, Michael French, a professor of health economics at the University of Miami, found that alcohol users not only exercised more than teetotalers, but the differential actually increased with more drinking.

I dont fully understand the relationship, Barr admits, though he has a speculation. Maybe people feel like after visiting the gym, they deserve to do something bad.

Its true enough anecdotally for myself, though Im a bit more of the reverse. I do something bad the night before, then feel the need to go jog five miles the next day.

I ask Barr point-blank, It seems like you ultimately think its safer to play in the NFL than to drink heavily?

Yeah, you could say that, he confirms.

This did not sound good for me. But what exactly did heavily mean? This week alone I sampled new whiskeys on Monday, drank wine with dinner on Tuesday, visited a hot new cocktail bar on Wednesday, went to a brewery opening on Thursday, and hit happy hour with friends on Friday.

Luckily, Barr relieved some of my concerns about any sort of future with dementia, simply telling me, You would not be on the phone with me, or even able to write this story, if you were drinking too much.

Regardless, I think Ill start trying to be more cognizant of my intake. As Paci ultimately summed up for me: The brain is an amazing thing. Your head hurts when you bang it. So you try not to bang your head again. With a hangover, theres obviously something similar going on there.

source http://allofbeer.com/2017/09/28/whats-worse-for-your-braindrinking-or-playing-football/ from All of Beer http://allofbeer.blogspot.com/2017/09/whats-worse-for-your-braindrinking-or.html

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viralhottopics · 8 years

Text

Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

Never red wine though. It stained my teeth and lips, Id explain when asked, and respond with my quirky I only drink it alone and in the dark answer. Theyd always laugh.

By the time YOLO was on T-shirts I had carpe diem booze down to a science.

When I was in college my hangover cure was strawberries and chocolate milk. After I received my diploma I graduated to well-done bacon, coffee, Mimosas. Water never entered the equation.

My favorite three words when I was with a guy were Want another round?

Yes, to all of the above. I point the finger at all of them and then back at me, and then at them and back at me. Lily says hi.

Today, I stare all the feels in the face, and make sure they know the last sixteen years matter but the last thirteen months matter even more. Im not her anymore, Im a different, more me now.

The good news is, Ive learned how to unwind on a Friday night without the trifecta of a bottle of wine, pizza and Netflix. My secret is just pizza and Netflix.

Read more: http://ift.tt/2iTRz6N

from Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

#Getting Sober: Redefining My Longest Relationship

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sherlockedmindblown-blog · 8 years

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THEFINALPROBLEM

‪Im angry for all those who see things which arent there..So i have to write it this way, 140 letters its not enough..its called FRIENDSHIP,not ur fantasy.. I have gay friends and i love them, I am all for LGBT rights,marriages,adoptions and everything so dont try make me a homophobe..Dont be so feisty and offensive..I am a huge fan of tv shows, i saw more than 200 shows, now i activly watching over 100 through the year, so I am bot specialist, but I have my opinion and kind of huge base to build on, cause i saw a lot..And i am also a shipper, so I get that..But the whole team who make #Sherlock (and they are doing some pretty pretty good and brilliant job) they cant make every shipper happy..And I know the world is trying ti change and be open and welcoming to gay people, and its right that way, cause we are all same...But u have to keep your reason and logic and whole thinking together..At first with your attitude they will didnt care about us and there will be no other season, and maybe for all u showing it would be deserved cause u are ungratefull and mean..Sorry u can ripped ne apart but I stand by my opinion and I will give you arguments why..Maybe some of you will understand..‬ ‪In every show u always find ur favorite, and ur shipping..And sometimes it happens and sometimes dont..I get it that u imagine yourswlf on Sherlocka or John place or imagine them as a dreamy oerfect couple which u want to live someday with someone in ur future..They change a lot and make a SPECTACULAR SHOW from old classic..But u want too much and u see things which are clearly not there..There is line between friendship and love. Of course u or i imagine that we change oyr crush to gay or straight or whatever it doesnt matter..But there is clearly totally different story.Not because creators want to make you mad amd furious and filling internet with these crap and throwing a lots of shit on their brilliant work..‬ ‪U dont not anymore concentrate on story..TRY TO THINK..please just try it with me..‬ ‪If ur wish would be fullfill hiw it would looks like abd what would happen with Sherlock, with show we all love and worship???‬ ‪So imagine it with me: ‬ ‪Theyre on a case, so much intense drama like always, everything we love...And in the middle of that they would be holding hands and showing their love and pride to whole world, in this case to whole London...And they would kiss or cuddle in Sherlock chair, or go on a date or whatever John going out of Sherlocks bedroom making him breakfest in the morning..I get it and I dont blame u that u are shipping this and see u in some way at their place...If I will be honest to u, maybe it will help, I imagine myself worh Sherlock so i dont want him with Mollt, Adler or John, dont care about gender..But I am reasonable intelligent person and I dont excpected this happy end for me( i know Sherlock is not real person, i am not crazy..) and I am totally "in love" (we cam call it in love probably) with Benedict Cumberbatch (I wasnt since the beggining, i actually wondering for two years why is whole world so swoon by him..I didnt saw it..I was so blind and stupid, now i get it maybe too much) but it doesnt change anything about that i love the show and i am very excited for what creators bring us and if they hive us more(please we want moooore) and if they give u ur happy ending Sherlock&John=❤❤❤ The biggest world love..That would totally ruin the whole show. It would become a totally different show which would many of us dont wanna watch, not because we are antigay or homophobic or whatever bullshit u will tell me, but because it would be wrong..They would instead of solving case solving they partership and problems in theirs relationship from why didnt u take out garbage to why did u cheated on me..So it would become a show about gay guys living in London splving specially their relationship because its aleays like that when partners work together..And usually they dont solve cases like that and dont get inti situation nearly close to this...So i u want Sherlock (if it ever will be another season, its in stars, but i believe in creators team that they dont ruin my hopes) to become a cheap like some german romantic movue from Rosamunde Pilcher, when u see those films u know it from first shoot, and u also now the whole story, keep preasure and hating what they done, all this amazing job...‬ ‪I would maybe shipping it two in different tv show, if it would be real...‬ ‪Its not my first rodeo, but in furst case I was sitting quitely and kept my mouth shout and my opinions to myself..‬ ‪But this time I am piss off cause u are all, touch ur conscience whi wrote what and where and hiw rude and disrespectfull to vreators u was, everyone one of u by yourself...Because they deserve so much better from us, our fandom, theyre doing it cause we love it so much. But we habe to be normal and think about whole thing ot only that part and gay happy end u want. It would make a joke from the whole show, because theyre both clearly elsewhere than u want them..John was dating, get married, had a baby, almost had an affair and its not still enough. I can almost hear u all argumenting that he or both of them are hidding it cause it happens in real life..Yeah but not everytime.Sometimes its just two huys become friends and after some time family..Sherlock, u could maybe said that he is little confusing about his sexuality at the start, and theough whole shiw, but its not about he being secretly gay( he is so clever and logic and reasonable that he would know that about himself and he would worked it out like everything, with pure logic) he is dofferent in other way, with his emotions, rudness, always bored by usuall stuff and ordinary life and so much mite thing, which we love so much about him..And he goes through some changes in those four bloody good seasons..He find his only friend in Watson, friend for gid sake, not future lover..He find his soulmate but in dofferent way that all lovesexpassion thing..And it was change him, in nice and goid way. But u all wake up and stop with all that hate pointing to creators and whole team..Ur fir no reason, yes i dont see that as a reason to hate all about finale and bitching and wining about it, because its not like u want it..U should appreciate and love the masterpiece they all made and not by bad and angry and rude AF! ‬ ‪I wastalking about that I saw this before, ta kind of funny because it was with Hannibal, it was also such a brilluant show( i became a huge fan of Mads Mikkelsen so see them together with Benedict in Doctor Strange was kind if my happy moment, omething like u wish with Sherlock and John huge gay love story..U are finding things where theyre not..) and it was same but it was probably a lot smaller fandom than Sherlock has, it was probably why it was cancelled after 3 season, but i also hope they will come back cause theyre some serious talks about it, but its not important now, but there was a characters of Hannibal and Will, it would take sometime to explain whole show but in shortcut Hannibal is psychopathic serial killer who eats people and like to cook them very goid, like high chefs stuffs and Will is nit an usuall detective(am I the only one who sees the simillarity yet?) he has this thing he can imagine in his somekind of mind palace how was those people kill when he us on crime scene..And there are some serious creeepy shit, but the point is that Hannibal becomes somehiw obssesed by Will, but not in the way of love, again, how somebody saw it, but there happen a lots of stuff which lead to weird kid of friendship between two very extraordinary people, like saving lives, and helping to other one, even if theyre are enemies fro the begiininf, and they both have relationship with women, doesnt matter hiw disturb those relationshio are, there was no romantic line between who somebody wanna see..It would also ruin the show, it was about friendship, between two not normal at all person, that fragile thing which start after all what they done to each other or to everybody else.Ther was that beauty, and this is the same case..We love Sherlock and Johns FRIENDSHIP...We dont want to turn it in different show, it wouldnt be like all ur memes and fanfiction story cause if this would happen there will be no base for any of this, u would win and what about us? U feel somehow(dobt get it why and how un this case) discriminated by this, but what about us all? There is always so mamy different opinions and tastes, never can make everyone happy, but theyre the creators and its up to them how its gonna be in the end. If u where on their place U could change it but they have theirs vision and they are creating it using their own fantasy and brilliant minds, all those twists and everything..U can express ur opinion, wish or feelings but doung that through rudness and hatefull comments and tweets and complains to BBC? I think its too much...And u being ungratefull amd dissrespectfull to their hard job...And amazing fantastic results... ‬ ‪They all deserve ours DEEPEST BOWS AND THANKS for taking us to this amazing rollercoaster ride of drama and emotions and hard thinking and deductions..It was quite something..And I dont say it like that, it means something cause I saw so many shows, and I usually watch even those which are nit as fun and i dont enjoy them too much, cause i am trying to give it a chance cause sometimes its worth it. But in case if Sherlock (i was never fanof crimi and i was the type "i dont givea fucj whi did that and why"cause they put detective and "maincharacters" aside in every crimi and i dont like that. Maybe I become wiser😂😂 i do t think so highly about myself😂😂with aging..Or i jist change, my taste change...) it was for the first time when I didnt do anything else then sit and didnt move or even breath at every episode, i didnt go to kitchen and let it play cause every minute and word it can be important, i didnt even scroll through my Iphone cause I am type of person who do t concentrate very good and gets easilly disstracted, and I was completly drown into...‬ ‪Yesterday I was being mad because of the finale cause we are now changing an operator and we are without cable tv, and I have this problem...I live in Czech Republic, so u all whos complaining, u cant imagine what i would give to have that chance to saw it cinema..I was prepar to be mad since 21 at England, at my country is one hoyr difference so its 22..And wait fir somebody uploaded online somewhere( not so nice, but when isnt any other usefull choice) so i couldnt look nowhere to avoid saw just a frame...And it was my imagination of pute torture..Longest two hours..Maybe u will think i am posh or whatever butour czech tv channel called Ct2 airs it at the same time, asi in England(surprise, in other cases we ate here at season 2 meanwhile there is season 6) but they made i with czech dabing..AndI just cant..I love it on english, i waych everything in english cause i hate stupid dabing its just looks like two totally different shows, the voice and the picture...Amd i would not even mention theyre picking very weirdly, with consideration(in their case not consideration would be more accurate) of real voice of those actors...So it would be torture and I would have it all completely ruined. So I was upset but I think I can not do anything, so I have to deal with it(u should do that too by the way). And I go to my best friend house around 20:00 and I was there only with my Iphone complaining about my "cruel fate" and how much I wanna saw it, in the best case now! My friend is untouched by Sherlocks charm ( i was trying to explain during watching it but I failed) and he doesnt completely understand my obssesion, so he looked at my like I am crazy. But even so he was trying to be helpfull and I try Google to find Bbc to watch online, it was second link, it was working but I didnt want to get my hopes up, but it was actually working. It was pure happiness and joy. I was literally sitting on the floor, totally carried away, holding my Iphone in ky hands listening to every word, poor my friend even go try to hold the washingmachine so I could hear that, and even I was a visitor for shit, he let me watch it all, and do t throw me out or kill me, for what I am beyond thankfull to him...And i enjoyed to best finale, another brilliant mind blowing episode and i was like on cloud nine, my emotions all over...Today i was little bit sad because I dont want this to be the end, i want more, and sooner than later...But its not in my powers and I have to hope and even if this was iver really like over over I would never be like u to creators even if it would ve there deccisiin if this is the end. I dobt know if its by the anonymity of the internet or what, and i dont wanna start with thinking about where the world going? But u bullying creators I dont have any other word for this. When I dound out today(yes I am maybe stupid but I assumed qhen I was so swooned and touched and excitedx from this episode, that everybody else defenetly must have been too..) And this is actually the reason why I spend half night by writting thus very long essay because of tv show...But this is about mire than that? its about basic human decency, which u dont have at all..Ur all like we want gueer and gay stuff here and the world is mean and bad and u creators are i dont wanna know how u called them, i feel ashamed by u, cause I dont want they to think the all fandom is bunch of mean hatefull people..Ur doing opposite for what u LGBT stands fir, but I really dobt wanna statt with those things..But u wanna be taken like "normal"(its not the right world, we are all same and what is even "normal" in this world...but i think u get how I mean it) but specially by this u putting yourselfs in special group whose calling for special treatment and its angry because its not what happened, and its offensive and discriminated to your LGBT rights...Dibt u see that this doesnt make sense cause it goes against each other....And because of this u make this whole ugly situation..‬ ‪I know u will have million and one things to said to me, to offended me or whatever but actually I am grown enough to take it and make it. I wrote this all just to express my opinion and my admiration to whole team of creators...Because they deserve it.. ‬ ‪So if by any chance this essay of mine gets a hold of eyes someone from whole Sherlock team this end will be for you. ‬ ‪I wanna thank you, so much, for bringing Sherlock to us and give us those amazing moments, and so brilliant tv show that there is hardly a rival somewhere. And I know that its not job of one, but whole team, so I bow to all of you, with hope in my heart that there will be more. I have to admmited that I was never so swallowed up by tv show, to do things like that. But this time I just have to. ‬ ‪To Mark Gattis and Steven Moffat as writters I truly envy their clever minds to get it here. Someone says that its out of line or reality or whatever someone didnt get gay finale, but I think that those two know very well what their are doing and they made it perfectly...So this is my thanks for entertain me...‬ ‪And in the end I have to, all actors are brilliant Martin is awesome (i didt saw Hobbit, so I keep thinking where did i saw him before and in the end i found out and laugh to myself, but I will make it right and watch all three espisodes very soon, i promise..) and i love this chemistry(friends) between John and Sherlock, because when I will be honest I would be like John...Little bit..Even if I would rather be Sherlock of course, i an realistic..And i love Martins looks on his face, those faces he makes, and I admire John for his strong friendship after all Sherlock did to him, even not on purpose..And Martin makes it so real and so good, he is good at his job.. ‬ ‪I am actually one of those who dont miss Moriarty, cause it would became boring if behind everything would be everytime only him..I think he is alive during TheFinalProblem because those subbtitles with time period was little late...And I was in shock but also I was like hell no..But that twist save it very well..And Andrew makes him very cool evilish devilish maniac, so I kind of like him after all..His tick tock on that red video drived me crazy, and I wasnt even there with Euros. Sian Brooke amazed me, she was terryfying, crazy but in the end I was sorry for her...She nailed it..And Mark as Mycrofr when he offers himself insteqd of John, and all was pure perfection together..Nithing was missing, badass Mr.Hudson, and i love just love that Sherlock feels something...And there I am going to the end, I save the best for last. Cause I dont if I dont let myself little carried away... ‬ ‪Because what makes Sherlock Sherlock its huge talent and gift from God and thats Benedict Cumberbatch. I am not any profesional and I just saying what I think but he is the best actor who walks on Earth right now...I did some reaserch today and i cant help myself but he is amazing even when you just listen to his voice reading a poem or audiobook, he has something special and perfect. I bow infront of him, so deep how I could, and that woukdbr be enough, cause he will achive great things, and I am very glad that he didnt go to law school, cause hidding this talent in court room would be such a waste. I really admire all of his work, and I have to say it I just love him..Its not other possibility. And other word wouldnt catch it like saying this love stuff. But we all know how it is, dont we? I am fangirling!!! Very much and I enjoying doing it. But I give myself goal and also fullfill dream if its happen that I wanna go to London to Sherlocked Event and meet him in real, say something nice( I will maybe figure it out till October) and take a pic..I would be very nervous, very, I am nervous from imagine it, making all thise script in my head what I will mess up. But we will see if I make it. And if i will I will thank him in person fir Sherlock and everything else.. ‬ ‪And thats all...And IT IS WHAT IT IS...‬ ‪ Sherlock ‬

#sherlock